Work Text:
Xisuma likes to work. At least, he thinks he does. And what is liking anyways? Dedicating your life, hours and hours to something you don't think you hate? Or is there more to it, a little switch flicked on behind the curtain that hides the little nuances of code he can't quite touch? If there is a difference that matters, how is he supposed to tell? Is it even possible to tell?
... That got a bit existential, didn't it? He can't quite help it. Coding is idle, sitting work, and he's so practiced that his mind tends to wander away in the late hours. Or are these the early hours? He's been working so long he can't quite tell. He prefers to mark the time by events, and not ticks or hours or sunrise or sunset. It keeps his memory sharp, no matter how much time passes.
It works more often than not. He's doing perfectly alright!
Doc in came to ask if he could create something called a 'Worldeater' before flying off in a flurry of fireworks and laughter before Xisuma could piece together enough of what he'd said to say no, or at least tell him to be careful. After a few minutes of wondering how concerned he should be about that, he decides that whatever he's doing is probably fine. Doc's done worse before and it usually turns out alright.
Impulse dropped by to ask a couple technical questions about a largescale wither skeleton farm, which went great, and then a couple less technical questions about how he and Keralis were doing, which went considerably less great. And it's not that he doesn't like talking to Keralis and planning builds with him, and hanging out with him even when they don't even talk, but he just doesn't get why everyone thinks they're dating!
Then of course Scar snuck in, wielding a bandolier of invisibility potions in one hand and a plate of cookies in the other. He says something about chorus fruit extract in the chocolate, and Xisuma can't help but be honored Scar would even consider going through all that effort for him. Granted, Scar's got the ratio a bit off, and it takes about half an hour to find a way down from the roof, but Xisuma really appreciates it. He'll have to plan a gift for him later.
Overall, completely normal hermit behavior. In what few breaks he allows himself he simply stares out the window, watching the other hermits scurry around like busy little bees, making more progress than he could've even imagined two, three seasons ago.
Xisuma loves his hermits. He’s so proud of them, even if he’s just watching them work, but he has more work to do. He turns away from the window. He can't lallygag forever, after all.
He likes to think this is good for him, because the alternative is that this is bad for him, and that can't be right.
The sun dipped below the horizon and there was quiet. It's long past nightfall now, but that doesn't mean much of anything to him. He can see perfectly fine in the dark. He doesn't know why his vision is blurry. He doesn't know why he can hear fireworks and- oh voids below, why can he hear screaming?
Xisuma winces as one of his windows shatters, the CRASH of glass splintering and hitting the floor. That's going to take hours to clean. But more importantly, someone just crashed through his window and didn't die, meaning they definitely need his help.
"Tango?" Xisuma calls, his voice scratchy with disuse, and come to think of it he doesn't remember the last time he's had something to drink. "If that's you again, you're gonna have to replace that window. Glass doesn't grow on trees, you know!"
Judging by the lack of a response, whoever just crashed through his window has either tried to run off and pretend it didn't happen, possibly adding a tally toward Grian, or hit the window so hard it knocked them unconscious.
He doesn't like the thought of either, if he's to be honest. He speeds up, glad he's already wearing his armor. It wouldn't do any good to have to fuddle around with any latches or clasps if one of his friends was hurt, now would it?
"Alright," Xisuma steps into the empty room. He hopes he's coming across as stern and not exhausted. "Whichever one of you did this has three seconds to come out and get a healing potion or else I'm going back to work. And this better not be another surprise party!"
He's only at two and a half (a new record, if it's Scar) when he hears the quiet tinkling of glass shifting somewhere behind him. Unconscious hermits don't scatter glass around, and badly injured ones don't stay silent like that. He feels relief surge through him, sudden enough to give him the funny feeling his knees are about to give out.
"Shishwham!" There are arms hooked beneath his shoulders, holding him upright. Even through his armor, he can feel the warmth radiating through him. He's glad Keralis is here. "And here I was, about to congratulate you on sleeping well."
"Well, you see, what had happened was..." Xisuma starts, before Keralis clicks his tongue and scoops Xisuma into his arms, armor and all.
He always forgets Keralis can do that. It always sends him reeling, dragging thoughts about new mods and plugins to a complete halt. He's not even mad about the window. How could he be, when he can't even hear himself think over his stuttering heartbeat?
"Keralis!"
“Yes shishwham? My pretty shishwammy? The starlight of my void?”
“Put me down!”
Keralis grins, looking down at Xisuma. Even through the tinted glass of his visor, Keralis easily maintains eye contact.
“Do you really want me to? Be honest now!” Xisuma can tell Keralis isn’t using any of his tricks, there’s no homey spark of magic settling behind his eyes. Even still, Xisuma doesn’t want to be untruthful.
“.. No.” Xisuma sighs, pressed tightly against Keralis’ chest. He’s glad his helmet’s sensors are so finely tuned, or else he wouldn’t be able to hear Keralis’ heartbeat. “But I have work to do.”
Keralis clicks his tongue. “What were you working on?”
“Reducing lag at spawn still.” Xisuma can’t help but feel safe. Keralis’ heartbeat is steady, and his stride is steady as he walks through Xisuma’s base. “I still can’t find where all those entities are hiding but I’m at least pretty sure it’s not item frames this time.”
“Mm.” Keralis says, “How long have you been working on that?”
“Only a little while, but I’ve also been making some serious progress on the design for the kelp farm.”
“Tell me more about that.” Keralis’ voice is quiet, low and soothing.
“You’d never believe it, but the flying machine is the easy part.”
Xisuma feels the familiar hum of Keralis’ Worldbound magic settle deep in his chest. It’s just as warm and comforting as Keralis himself is, so he quickly decides not to worry about it.
“There’s a lot of physics,” Xisuma grimaces, “that goes into making sure all the water will stay in place.”
Keralis’ steps falter for a moment, a tap.. tap where there shouldn’t have been hesitation, before he finds his footing again.
“You’ve been working so hard, haven’t you?”
“I guess so.”
“No guessing! You’ve been working for a long time, and that absolutely deserves a break.”
“But I’m not done with anything yet.”
“The kelp farm will be there later! And if the entithingies go away while you’re resting, that just means you have less work to do later.”
Xisuma can’t argue with that logic. Keralis is, unfortunately, fully correct. Nothing he’s currently working on is on a strict time limit, even if his fellow hermits would probably enjoy a less laggy spawn.
Xisuma sighs. Keralis starts to hum in response. It’s nothing Xisuma personally recognizes, but it’s slow and soothing all the same. He thinks it might be the lead sax part of some jazz song or another.
Xisuma blinks his eyes open and peers up at Keralis. He hadn’t noticed his eyes had been closed to begin with. Was he really that tired?
Keralis looks relaxed, a smile on his face as he hums some nameless tune. He doesn’t look down at Xisuma, but he probably knows he doesn’t have to. If Xisuma was going to do anything other than be a comfortable deadweight in Keralis’ arms, he would’ve said something already.
The door to Xisuma’s office passes by. Xisuma blinks. Hold on a second. His starter base doesn’t have an office. Keralis must’ve brought him to Xisuma’s private server, making him one of maybe three people to ever set foot in it without explicit invitation.
For some reason, the thought doesn’t upset him. This server exists solely so he can have a safe place to rest that’s not as completely isolated as a singleplayer world, and Keralis did bring him here to rest..
Did Keralis also bring him here to make him feel safe?
If he did, well, it’s working. The quiet hum of hidden redstone, the low ba-thump of Keralis’ heartbeat, the constant rhythm of Keralis’ steps.. it’s all very soothing, in a way he’d forgotten he could feel.
He should really let Keralis do this more often.
If anyone had to (quite literally!) sweep him off his feet and pull him onto an entirely different server, Keralis would be his number one choice. There’s no one in the world he trusts more.
Keralis carefully bumps open the bedroom door with his hip. Xisuma’s room is exactly how he left it last time he was here, which is to say full of Keralis’ knickknacks and smelling faintly of homemade incense.
It’s not as if he minds Keralis’ stuff being here. He’s been careful not to leave a mess after the first time he nearly tripped while carrying Xisuma, and besides that, it’s not as if he had much in the name of decoration to begin with.
It feels cozier with Keralis’ things here. Keralis must like it too, considering how often he brings over more shirts and hats and shampoo and- oh.
Oh.
Is that why Impulse asked about their relationship?
He feels a bit silly now.
He can’t fault his hermits for thinking he and Keralis are romantically involved when Keralis so readily moved into his private homestead, especially considering Xisuma let him.
He likes Keralis being here, to be fair. Having someone he cares for so deeply allowed in a place so near and dear to his heart is something he wouldn’t trade for several worlds.
Does Keralis know how important he is? Surely he must, but the idea of Keralis having even the slightest inkling of a doubt makes something twist in Xisuma’s chest so sharply he can barely breathe.
“Keralis,” Xisuma starts, his voice so low it startles them both.
“Yes?” Keralis matches Xisuma’s tone, gentle and warm like a crackling fireplace. Xisuma wonders if he sounds that lovely to Keralis.
“Are we,” The words melt in Xisuma’s throat, leaving him staring at Keralis as he’s ever so tentatively set down on a plush bed. The linen sheets and down-stuffed duvet were both Keralis’ idea. It’s the most comfortable bed he’s ever had. Even when Keralis hasn’t visited in a while, the smell of honey and aftershave and quartz lingers.
Xisuma is stalling. He knows he is, but he can’t help it. He doesn’t want to mess this up with the one man who’s been there for him for as long as he can remember. “I mean, I know you’ve made yourself comfortable here- and that’s great, don’t get me wrong!- but are we friends?”
“Friends?” Keralis echoes, a hint of amusement growing in his warm brown eyes. “Of course. For as long as you’ll have me, of course.”
Xisuma.. hesitates.
He doesn’t know what he expected to get out of that, really, but he thinks it wasn’t that. He would love to hear Keralis’ voice like that again, low and almost reverential, promising. But he doesn’t want the promise to be of friendship.
Something in his chest wilts, even as Keralis gently twines his fingers amongst Xisuma’s like thread pressed through welcoming fabric. Xisuma tries not to look disappointed. He really shouldn’t be. He doesn’t even know what he wants, how could he expect Keralis to?
“What- what if I didn’t want that?”
Keralis gives Xisuma a moment to collect his thoughts.
“Not that I don’t want to be friends- I like having you around all the time, and I really like hanging out with you even if it’s just stuff like quartz hunting in the nether because you don’t like going alone, even if I’m next to no help when it comes down to it- but I just..”
Jeez, he’s tired. He doesn’t know where he was leading with that rambling tirade of complete nonsense. Even though he knows Keralis isn’t judging him, he can’t help but feel embarrassed. He wouldn’t be making a fool out of himself if he’d just gone to bed like a responsible adult.
“Shishwham,” Keralis says, in that hushed near-scolding tone he only ever uses when he’s being too hard on himself. “First of all, you just being there helps. I don’t like the nether, you know I don’t like the nether, and I haven’t in a few seasons,” ‘Since the incident’ goes unspoken. “But it’s nice having you here.” ‘It wasn’t your fault’ goes equally as unspoken. “You don’t have to be useful for me to like having you around. I care about you, not just the things you can do.”
Xisuma blinks, warmth crashing over him like a tsunami and seeping through the gaps in his armor until all he can do is try not to melt against Keralis. He blinks again and hopes Keralis doesn’t see the near-tears he almost let slip.
“Second, you’re the most caring, intelligent, kind, wonderful man I’ve ever met and the fact you always offer to come with me only proves that. There’s no way you would keep coming all the way out to the nether just to save my tushy if you weren’t!” Keralis isn’t at all deterred by the blush spreading across his face and blooming on the tips of his ears. “It’s been an honor even knowing you! You’ve made my life brighter just by being a part of it. There’s not a day that goes by without me caring about you, and I love you.”
Keralis beams, the corners of his eyes crinkling with the force of it. He seems more relaxed, somehow, as if he hadn’t just told Xisuma the most important thing in the world.
“Don’t you feel pressured to say it back, or decide how you feel right now. You’re still supposed to be here resting, wrapped in real blankets instead of just being AFK at some farm somewhere! That’s still not good for your back, shishwammy.” Keralis says with a smile. “I just wanted to tell you.”
“It’s okay,” Xisuma says, and he means it. How could he not? His heart is full of care and admiration and it’s honestly ridiculous how long he misidentified this feeling before. “I feel a bit silly saying it like this after your whole thing, but I think I love you too.”
Keralis lights up like a christmas tree, his eyes sparkling as he meets Xisuma’s gaze. He knows Keralis means it with every last ounce of his soul as he laughs and pulls Xisuma into a comfortable embrace, one he’ll never forget for as long as he lives.
Keralis is warm, incredibly so. Xisuma would bet all the honeycomb in his farm on Keralis feeling even warmer if Xisuma were out of his armor. Keralis’ broad chest is pressed against his own, and even through his armor he can feel the slow and soothing rhythm of his breathing.
He can’t help but relax, feeling like he’s floating despite being strapped into all his armor. He feels completely and utterly safe, but he doesn’t let himself drift off just yet.
“And.. nothing has to change, right?”
“Of course not.” Keralis squeezes Xisuma, his tight hug nothing but cozy despite Xisuma’s less than cuddly armor. “I already live in your wonderful house! The only way things could change even if you tried is if you stopped wearing your helmet so I could kiss you on your pretty face instead of just your visor.”
That’s not a half bad idea, actually. He could. Maybe not in public, but if Keralis would enjoy it, there’s no harm in trying.
“Okay. Just checking.”
That neatly solves the last of his immediate worry. With nothing to keep him awake and a safe embrace surrounding him, Xisuma presses his face against Keralis’ shoulder and lets himself drift.
Xisuma yawns. “Goodnight Keralis.”
“Goodnight Shishwammy.” Xisuma can all but hear the smile in Keralis' voice as he adds, “Sleep tight. And don’t let the bedbugs bite!”