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Evangeline Fox always believed in fairy tales, happy ever afters, princesses getting married with the princes they insanely loved and having all the dreams come true. Because if she didn't believe that, it wouldn't be true. And her marriage with a prince would remain her silly childhood dream.
Though it became true eventually, she found out girls need to be very specific about what kind of prince they wanted.
Jacks wasn't Evangeline's type. She knew that from the beginning, from the very first moment she laid her eyes on him at his church. He didn't believe in love and the language of deals was the only language he spoke, whereas Evangeline was a native love language speaker.
They were two opposites. He wanted to remain broken, she desired to get things repaired no matter what. He looked at the night sky and saw darkness which may help him ruin people's lives in secret. She looked at the stars and thought every one of them was someone's dream waiting to become true. He destroyed his happy ever after because he thought his story wasn't meant to have one. She fought for it and didn't give a shit about things people said or predicted.
Their difference was that Evangeline always trusted her heart, and Jacks didn't think he had one which worked properly.
She shouldn't feel angry or devastated when he finally seemed to hurt her right when it ached, but she felt. It was cruel. It wasn't unforgivable, but not when he didn't want to acknowledge his words hurt her and that the pain was bigger than before, than when they worked together to find the stones, than when he manipulated her in order to get what he wanted. Nothing of that was real, and that's what was different now.
Evangeline rushed upstairs their cozy house in Magnificent North they built themselves when everything seemed to end right where it should and they were finally let to have some time alone. Maybe the whole life, she didn't know. Evangeline didn't even look at pictures in frames when she passed through the hall and shut the door of her tiny library. She slid down the wooden wall and took several deep breaths, her thoughts a hurricane of fury, pain, surprise and… love.
Evangeline hated that the most. The fact she still desperately, irretrievably loved him even when he offended her. Some people would say it was toxic, but they didn't know the whole story. They didn't know that Jacks, despite learning to be caring, was the most stubborn living creature in the world and didn't simply recognize his mistakes. And the fact he was a Fate once didn't help, so. He evolved, but slowly and in the only possible way: making a wild destroying fire everywhere he laid his eyes on.
The only option was either to deal with all of his issues and work on them or to leave him to fight alone. And Evangeline Fox simply couldn't leave him alone: she knew too well how it feels to fight a battle with no one to catch you if you fall.
But again, it was impossible to always stand up to his poisoning words.
"Get out", she thought and hoped he was angry enough to walk away and leave her alone. Tears fell down her cheeks while she sat in the small but cozy room full of bookshelves with dozens of Northern stories and ballads. As if on purpose, the first book which caught Evangeline's sight, was "The Ballad of the Archer and the Fox" and she felt a gut in her stomach tightening.
"Can't, Little Fox."
"If you really think I can stand you for one more second, then you—"
"Look out of the window. You know me not well enough if you think I'll walk outside."
She frowned at these words and pumped herself up just enough to see what was going on outside of the window on the opposite side of the room. In the mini library there was a nice noise isolation, so clearly Evangeline didn't hear the rain pouring on the street. It was wild and wonderful and so unnorth-like she stood beside the window for a couple of minutes.
There was always freezing cold at North except during the summer season when an average temperature was capable of melting the ice. But pouring rain was odd.
"Okay, then."
"That's all? I thought you'd figure something out to get the awful monster out of your home", Jacks's sarcastic evil voice answered.
"Can you please stop making everything a joke for once? I'm trying to explain why it hurt me so much and you still think I'm the silly one. Poor child Evangeline, let's help her figure things out, tell her how to feel because she's just a lost orphan who doesn't know how to react properly to the fact the man she loves returned her from dead and didn't bother to tell her that! I'm reaching out to you like what, a thousandth time, and you prove to me once more that it means zero to you."
Evangeline didn't even think of the last sentence, she shouted it mentally so Jacks would be able to hear how that new information had affected her.
He was silent for a couple of minutes, enough for Evangeline to think he gave up and went making dinner or reading or eating some blue apple or whatever he was about to do.
"Get back downstairs", she heard his voice in her head and refused to acknowledge a wave of relief crushing her body.
"You can't think I'll actually do what you say."
"Please."
"No."
"Okay, so. Can you open the door, then?"
She did it mostly because of the surprise she felt after hearing his voice in her head. He sounded not like before, as if he was finally serious. And, of course, a question to open the door surprised her, too.
When Evangeline reached for the doorknob and opened the door, Jacks stood there, right in front of her, all masks were down. His face was a combination of sorrow, misery and confusion, as if he didn't really understand what made Evangeline so upset.
"Wanted something?" she asked, trying to calm down her nerves. Maybe she wanted him to hear desperation in her voice, but that doesn't mean she wanted him to see it.
"You know me too well, Little Fox. I always want something. What was that?"
"Oh, so you're interested now? It didn't seem like that downstairs, when you just simply threw the new information at me. «Hey, by the way, you'd died and I returned back in time so you didn't die and that's why all your memories were gone. Have a nice day.» Oh, no, without the last sentence because that's not normal if you wish someone to have a nice day."
Jacks let out a loud exhale, Evangeline could clearly see how he tries to stay calm too and don't blow up because of her words. But she couldn't help herself. She loved him so much she thought it was impossible to love him more, but today was the proof she can. And still, if they didn't fight today, she'd never find out that she was, indeed, dead. That's why she couldn't remember anything from her past, including stories her mom had told her, including every single day she had spent fighting, laughing, crying with Jacks by her side or on the opposite of hers. Including even her name. And all of that happened because her memories turned out to be an equal value of her life.
"Why didn't you tell me?" she asked, her voice cracking. "After everything, when we lived here. Just simply one morning tell me what happened the day we used the stones. That was the only part I didn't understand, well, before today. The reason I lost my memories", Evangeline sniffed, looking at Jacks as if he was the bad guy. "You knew that I was confused and you didn't tell me. I can understand if you screwed up there or something, if that was your mistake because no one wants to talk about that. But you saved me. I— "
"Seriously, does that really matter to you?" Jacks interrupted, shocked quietly. "It was nothing. Keeping you alive was my job, and I didn't handle it well."
There was so much hidden pain in his voice she almost gave in.
"Nothing?" she repeated, so far away from this conversation. "Maybe that was nothing for you, but for me it's everything."
She looked up at him again and saw a red moisture in his eyes, unbearable pain could be seen in the blues. He seemed so distant, too, buried in the memories of that night, and it hurt him as well.
"You really think for me it was nothing? There's a difference", he said and brought himself to look at her, at the girl who saved him in every way he could be saved. She was so broken at this moment, her eyes and nose red and lips trembling, it seemed one touch could shatter her into a million rose-gold pieces and he knew he wouldn't survive the second time if that happens.
"I don't know what to think at all" she shrugged, her hand moving to her beautiful face to wipe away the tears on her cheeks. "Since I remember everything again I don't know how to talk to you. Everything became weird, as if you think it's better to just shove me off or turn mine and your words into a joke than to explain things."
That was true. Despite Evangeline feeling happier than ever after she and Jacks have got a chance to have a happy ending, there were nights she couldn't sleep, couldn't eat and couldn't breathe because Jacks's behavior confused and upset.
"You died in my arms," he said quietly. Evangeline froze, never taking her eyes off him as if she'd die again if she did. "That's what you want to hear? You died in my arms. I couldn't— I couldn't think, your body and clothes were covered in your blood, and your neck was—" he stopped talking, swallowing hard. Jaw tightened and his knuckles turned white. "It was— I—", he took a deep breath to collect himself and looked at Evangeline, this time with so much love and concern, as if him memorizing that night could actually hurt her again. "I saw you there, lying and not moving, and when I touched you… You were cold. It didn't feel right, you were always so warm and your heartbeat was like a stormy sea, it changed almost all the time. And then your heart just… stopped beating. I lost my mind and the only thing I remember wanting is you blinking or smiling or coughing or I don't know— Showing some signs of being alive. And you didn't. There was only one thing on my mind then. You being alive. It was everything I wanted, everything I could think of and with you continuing to lose blood in my arms, dead and not breathing, I could think about the only option able to save you."
"The stones", Evangeline said with tears in her own eyes. She saw that Jacks was scared to love her right before they returned to the Wolf Hall, offended she thought the only reason he was gentle and caring with her was the mirth stone. She saw that completely clearly when they let Castor Valor in the arch and seeing Jacks right now, unarmed, without the bravado he'd been carrying with him all the time, dissolved Evangeline's anger in the air.
He was afraid of losing her. Him being the Archer was a carte blanche to get Evangeline out of his life so she could live. The loss of her memories could possibly be the same and it was at first, but Jacks wouldn't be Jacks if he just let it be. When he saw the devastation and sorrow Evangeline had been in, he knew he must return her memories. Because that's what made Evangeline Fox so special. Every single day she lived through made her stronger and taking her memories was too much even for Jacks because this girl deserved all her memories back and the rest of the world as a compensation for the moral damage.
Fortunately, that stopped him from running away, because the first words Evangeline had said after she remembered everything were "I love you" said to Jacks. She explained later that the very first thing she memorized was that she didn't have a chance to tell him these words. And how the hell was he supposed to walk away, leave alone this girl who knew well how to put her ass in problems, after what she'd said?
"I knew time would take something, but… I couldn't think about it at that point", he confessed. "I'm sorry if I hurt you but… You having your fairytale ending happily was the only thing that means something to me and I truly have no clue why you are still here with me."
Evangeline glanced in Jacks's icy-blue eyes and smiled brightly through the tears from the amount of love she had for him. He didn't deserve the world where he'd been trying to ruin everyone's life, but if he deserved something, it was her heart.
And she was more than glad to give it to him.
Evangeline leaned in and hugged Jacks in an attempt to show him everything she felt in her arms wrapped tight around his neck, in her tears streaming down her cheeks, in her quiet laugh by his ear. Jacks circled his arms around her waist and drew her as close as possible to him, until there was no inch of their bodies not touching each other. Evangeline felt the warmth of his lips on her head and knew she never felt as in peace as right now, in the arms of a man who wasn't a definition of peace at all.
"I love you", Evangeline said. "I've loved you since the first time you told me about your past and started to open up, I love you and I will love you no matter what. There's plenty of other people outside whose lives you'd ruined, but mine isn't one of them."
She felt his smile on her head and how his hands slowly moved up and down her spine until he finally brought himself to move a few inches back just enough to look in her eyes.
This girl was truly a hero. If there was something Jacks could dream of, it was Evangeline. If there was someone he didn't want to corrupt or arrange a meeting with cruel reality, it was Evangeline. If there was a reason Jacks still believed in mankind, that reason was Evangeline. If there was someone he could love, it was Evangeline.
Evangeline Fox. The only one on his mind, the only girl in his wrecked wicked heart.
"I love you, too", he said and eventually let a single tear drop from his eye. Last time he did so it was scarlet, but now it turned out to be different.
Transparent as glass.
And before Evangeline could progress this change in her mind and acknowledge Jacks wasn't a Fate anymore, he lowered his lips to hers in the best kiss the world had ever seen.
She always thought about how it'd feel to kiss Jacks, to have these mischievous lips not only on her neck, but on her mouth. To test if that's really a kiss worth dying for.
Jacks kissed Evangeline gently, but firm, holding on to her like she was the only thing able to keep him alive. For some reason, he thought their impossible first kiss(he never planned on kissing her while being a Fate, of course, but a man could dream) would be soft and caring, so slow it was more of a cuddle.
That kiss was wild. Jacks touched her lips with his like a dying man, his fingers most likely to leave small bruises on her waist. He brushed his lips among hers and couldn't comprehend that this truly was happening. He kissed her. He was able to kiss this angel of a girl more than once.
And at right this moment, right when he was kissing and drawing her closer, Jacks knew there was nothing left in the world he'd possibly want. Or want more than be beside Evangeline for the rest of his days. His life was always a search for things which could make him happy, which could fill the void in his soul and make his heart not only beat, but work again. After he found all of that, there was just nothing worth his attention anymore.
"I love you, too", he whispered after they both had managed to make their breaths steady. "I knew I loved you the second I'd seen you whirling in front of the mirror in that sparkling dress and I never stopped since. Maybe you pretended that you're mine, but I didn't. I'd always been yours and I will remain no matter what."
Evangeline looked in his eyes full of love and humanity and for the first time in many months was sure they'll live happily ever after.