Chapter Text
“Ah, there you are. Puss in Boots, in the flesh.” A deep voice said from Puss’s right, nearly making him flinch in surprise; he hadn’t even noticed anyone come in. Oof, clearly he’d had enough to drink.
“And you are?” He glanced at the stranger while setting down his half-empty shot glass, making a mental note to cancel his order of the heaviest cream the place had to offer, which the bartender had just left to grab.
“A big fan; been following your career for a while. Closely.” The wolf said as he leaned in close, smile looking just a little too wide as he stared directly at him with crimson eyes, unblinking.
“That’s strange;” Puss scooted over a bit in an attempt to bring back some of the distance between them. “I do not recall having seen you before.” He gave the wolf a once-over, noting his large hulking frame, his piercing red eyes, his pristine sleek silvery-white coat. Yeah, he would’ve recognized this guy if he’d ever seen him even once before.
“Well, I tend to stick to the shadows, keep to myself.” The stranger shrugged as he righted himself in his chair. “But felt it was high time for a change of pace.”
“Oh? And what kind of ‘change of pace’ would that be?” Puss queried with a raised brow.
“Well I figured, what would be a better way to get into the thick of things, other than join up with my favorite fearless hero?” The wolf explained with a grin.
Puss couldn’t help but laugh heartily in response to that. “Sorry guapo, I appreciate the offer, but if you’re really such a ‘big fan’ then you’d know Puss in Boots is kind of a solo act. I travel alone.” He slapped a few coins on the counter before hopping off his stool, wobbling a tad after landing. “Belay that last order, jefe.” He called loud enough for the barkeep to probably hear him from the back. “I think I’ll keep it light tonight.” He then left the establishment without a backward glance. Though getting one last peek at the wolf had been tempting, he knew that would only serve to encourage the guy.
In fact he half expected to be followed out by the strange wolf, but it seemed luck was on his side and he was left to his own devices. He soon found a nice comfy tree to spend the night and settled in, the seven and a half shots of cream helping him quickly fall into a peaceful slumber.
-
He awoke when he felt the warm rays of dappled sunlight poking through the leaves to caress his fur with their warm gentle touch, and languidly stretched his limbs, making a sound of confusion when his paw came into contact with something soft.
“Hey there Dormilón, did you have sweet dreams?”
His eyes shot open to see none other than the wolf from the bar chilling on the branch next to him. “Aah! Hijo de puta!” He shouted before he found himself tumbling out of the tree in shock.
Before getting the chance to see if he’d land on all fours after having just awoken, however, he felt his momentum cease.
“Aww, you’re not scared of me, are you?” The wolf all but cooed as he held Puss up by his cape before setting him gently back down on the tree.
“Please, I do not fear death, why would I be afraid of you?” Puss huffed, brushing himself off. “You just surprised me is all.” He sniffed indignantly.
“Understandable.” The wolf said before an iconic cavalier hat with a golden plume came into view between them.
“Gracias, señor.” Puss said as he took it from the hands that were each bigger than his entire head, before fitting it snugly atop his noggin where it belonged.
Puss wanted to ask what in the blazes the wolf was even doing here, but didn’t want to converse more than necessary and give the guy the impression he’d be cool having someone tag along with him. “Well, I best be off; these rippling muscles aren't going to feed themselves.” He said before purposefully falling from the tree and landing in a graceful pose, then starting off for the next town to get some grub.
“So, where we headed?” The wolf asked from directly beside him, nearly causing Puss to flinch in surprise once again; how was he (nearly) as quiet as Puss himself if he was so large?
Then his words caught up to Puss’ brain. “Woah woah, what’s with this ‘we’ stuff, hombre loco? Were you not listening to anything I said last night?” He thought he’d been pretty clear. Then again he’d kind of been drunk at the time, so he may have remembered incorrectly. Perhaps it was time for a reiteration. “I work alone. Solo pero feliz. So, adiós, and have a nice day.” He gave a cheeky salute before turning away and quickening his pace.
“Well, it seems we’re going in the same direction, so why don't you tell me the tale of your favorite battle on the way? You do have one, right? We can talk while we walk.” The silvery one lilted as he didn’t even seem to notice the change in traveling speed.
Oh great, he was one of those types. Well, no matter; he knew exactly how to deal with folks who didn’t know when to give up. And luckily it was a plan that could be easily enacted too. “Well, I do like to extol my virtues, and what better way than to wax poetic about my most epic of showdowns?” He began, pretending he’d been convinced. “But such a tale is deserving of a level of storytelling best not experienced on an empty stomach, so wouldn’t you prefer to hear it over a meal in the next town?” He coaxed.
“Sounds divine.” The wolf agreed. “Esperándolo~” He rumbled lowly.
“Yeah yeah, same here.” Puss replied distractedly before falling quiet as he decided where exactly to go.
Eventually the silence got kinda awkward for Puss, so he gave in and exchanged in some small talk, randomly switching between answering questions about himself truthfully or with malicious falsehoods, as one could never be too careful.
Especially now.
None too soon they stumbled upon an eatery Puss recognized after making it to the next town without issue. Good, since he was familiar with the place it would only make this next step easier. He led the way to an outdoor table and addressed his soon to be ex-traveling partner. “If you would be so kind as to hold our table I’ll go inside and order our meals.”
“I shall guard it with my life.” The wolf smirked and crossed his heart as he plopped into one of the chairs languidly.
Aye, this guy was even more exasperating than he was. Or at least he hoped that was the case (it was kinda hard to judge considering he was never on the receiving end of his own one-liners), otherwise he could understand why some people were so quick to draw their weapons on him. “Right. Un momento.” He said before throwing open the doors to the place and sidling up to the counter. “One order of your finest pescado, por favor.” He said with a wink to the person at the counter. “And not to be rude, but could you perhaps put a rush on that? I’m in a bit of a hurry.” With a flourish he deposited the payment on the counter, a little extra mixed in for the special request.
“Sure thing, we’ll have it out in a jiffy.” The attendant said with a cheery smile before heading to the kitchen.
“Much appreciated.” Puss said as he examined the interior, making sure it hadn’t changed since the last time he’d paid the place a visit. Sooner than expected his meal was out and he swallowed the perfectly-seasoned fish in one go, then casually slid out the back door and made a run for it.
“Oh Puss, you are a genius!” He laughed as he sprinted his way through the town, easily dodging and leaping over obstacles with his cat-like reflexes, eventually turning around when he was far enough away from the town that it looked no bigger than a child’s play toy, and took a moment to catch his breath atop the verdant hill he’d run up. “Phew, that oughta do it.” He sighed, wiping pretend sweat from his forehead. There was no way the wolf would be able to find him now.
“Impressive moves, mind teaching me some?”
Puss froze and turned to see none other than said wolf casually leaning against a tree just beside him. “Que demonios?!” He jumped back on instinct, only for one of his feet to come into contact with nothing but thin air. He gasped and his eyes shot wide open as he felt himself suddenly falling backwards off the high apex.
“Woah there,” A large hand gently wrapped itself around his forearm and pulled him safely back onto solid ground. “careful;” the wolf smirked down at him, before placing his other hand on the small of Puss’ back, then turning a half circle in a tangoesque manner, to set him down away from the sheer side of the hill. “we wouldn’t want you to lose a life, now would we~?” He rumbled out smoothly.
Puss shoved at his savior (and sole reason for needing saving in the first place) to get out of the hold—hoping he wasn’t blushing—then asked the important question. “How the devil did you get here before me?!” He’d sprinted the whole way for crying out loud! And Puss wasn’t exactly known for being slow.
“Eh, I saw that one coming, so I got a head start.” The wolf casualed while inspecting his claws.
“Grrr” Puss growled; this guy was as cunning as he looked. “Okay, if you’re so dead-set on this, then give me one good reason I should allow you to tag along with me, the legendary Puss in Boots.” He crossed his arms in annoyance.
“I have a lot of talents. Talents I’m sure you’d find useful.” The wolf grinned.
“Oh? Like what?” Puss asked as he looked at the other doubtfully. The guy didn’t even carry a weapon, how useful could he possibly be?
“I’m a great cook.” The wolf rubbed his knuckles on his chest arrogantly.
“Big deal, so am I.” Puss waved him off. “Try again.”
“I have plenty of experience with bargaining.” The wolf rumbled.
“Please, I practically invented bargaining; people sometimes pay me to take something off their hands.” Puss informed hubristically, ignoring the odd emphasis. “Next.”
“I excel at shelter-building.” The large figure supplied.
“As if I couldn’t just use a tree, or construct a shelter myself.” Puss rolled his eyes. “Anything else?”
“I’m fluent in many languages.” The wolf revealed with an arrogant lilt.
“Sou nano? Wie niedlich~ My third middle name is ‘polyglot’.” Puss gloated back. “Sounds to me like you don’t exactly have anything useful to offer that I can’t already do better myself.” He turned away from the other with a huff. “So why don’t you just be a good boy and run alo-”
“How about a challenge?” The wolf interrupted.
That piqued Puss’ interest, his gambling proclivities rearing their ugly head. “A challenge, you say?” He turned his head back just far enough to reestablish eye contact.
“That’s right.” The wolf smirked as he began to walk a slow circle around the hero.
“And just what kind of challenge did you have in mind, exactly?” Puss asked, trying to sound indifferent as he tracked the silvery one’s movements.
“A game of hide and seek.“ The taller of the two began. “The rules are simple: the game will last ten minutes. The first five are to allow you time to secure a good hiding spot while I stay in place and count aloud, the other five are for me to find you. If time runs out before I manage that, then you win and I leave you alone for good. But if I do find you within the allotted time, then you stop fussing about me accompanying you. Sound good?” He raised an eyebrow after finishing his explanation.
“More like ‘easy peasy lemon squeezy’. You’ve got a deal, primo.” Puss stuck out a hand to shake on. “I’ll have you know I am a champion of hide and seek, so you just signed up for a guaranteed loss.”
“Well that remains to be seen.” The wolf merely grinned in response before taking the proffered hand and sealing the deal with a firm shake.
~•*•~
Puss smiled in self-satisfaction as he chilled in his brilliant hiding spot. He’d taken a dip in a lake, then covered himself in mud to disguise his scent, made a few false trails, then found a nice fragrant thicket of flower bushes to hide amongst, which is where he now sat, waiting out the last thirty seconds. “Hehe, he’ll never find me, and time is almost up~” He gloated quietly.
“Oh, on the contrary, I found you a while ago.” Said a smooth voice from directly behind him.
“Ahh!! Sangre de bestia!” Puss made to jump forward, but ended up tripping and falling on his face thanks to the slippery mud still coating his boots. “You are going to give me a heart attack!” He pointed accusingly from his prone position on the soft grass.
“Well, we wouldn’t want that;” his spooker spoke as he raised Puss up to eye level after grabbing the extended arm. “I hear those can be deadly~” He gently set him down, then casually brushed some of the now-drying mud off the shoulders of previously orange fur.
“Grr, how did you even find me?” Puss spat as he batted the meddling hands away. “My technique was flawless!” He’d accuse the guy of cheating if he hadn’t heard him counting with his own ears. But if the wolf had indeed played fair, then that would mean Puss had likely made a mistake somewhere, forgotten something, left behind a clu- but no; he’d done his usual to cover all his tracks (both physical and otherwise). It was second nature by this point, so he’d definitely covered all bases.
…Right?
“Oh, no doubt about that.” The wolf assured. “It’s just that I happen to be a top-notch tracker.”
Puss’ relief at having not erred was short-lived when the secondary implication of the words processed and he sent the wolf a death glare. “Yet you failed to mention that in your skill set?” Such a thing would’ve been nice to know before he’d accepted the challenge. Not that he would’ve declined if he’d known, but he probably would have gone a little more hardcore.
“Did I?” The wolf said with a poorly concealed shit-eating grin. “Must’ve slipped my mind.” He flippanted with an unconcerned shrug.
“For some reason I very much doubt that.” Puss ground out through gritted teeth, understandably incensed.
“Anyway, now that that’s settled,” He continued as if Puss hadn't said anything. “Where to next, amigo?”
Oh.
Oh hell no. “Listen up, pendejo.” He rounded on the other. “Just because I’m going to let you follow me around like a little lost puppy does not mean I am your ‘amigo’.”
“Whatever you say,” the wolf replied lightly. “compadre.”
Puss’ eye twitched. “Come to think of it, extraño, I don’t even know your name.” He said with an accusatory squint.
“Oh right, how rude of me." The almost-cheater said, giving an exaggeratedly deep and formal bow. "You may call me Lobo.”
Puss rolled his eyes at the theatrical display before an idea suddenly came to mind. “Hmm, I don’t know, you look more like a Perrito to me.” He smarmed with a cheeky grin, sure that would get a rise out of the other.
“Ooh, pet names already~?” His conversation partner smirked with a cocked brow.
Well, that didn’t work. His grin dropped.
“In that case maybe I should call you Gatito~” The silvery one suggested with an irksome smirk.
“Puss is fine, thank you very much.” The fearless hero huffed as he started off for the lake to wash off.
“You are most welcome.” The irritator said, falling into step beside him. “By the way, I appreciate your dedication to the sport.” He looked up and down Puss’ mud and dirt-caked form.
“I would too if I’d actually won.” Puss growled lowly in response.
“Now, I believe someone owes me a story about their favorite battle?” The tall one prompted.
“I only said that to lure you into a false sense of security.” Puss revealed. Bedsides, he’d never actually agreed to tell him; merely implied such a thing.
“I figured as much.” The other replied, annoyingly unperturbed. “Can’t blame a guy for trying though, right?“
“Try all you want, you’re still not going to hear it. No one ever has, and I plan to keep it that way.” Puss huffed, crossing his arms stubbornly.
“Ooh, so mysterious~” Was all but cooed in response. “Must be a good one.”
“Yes yes, too good for the ears of mortals; it would cause their heads to explode or something.” Puss responded noncommittally, as they'd reached the lake. “Now would you give me a moment? I prefer to do my ablutions in peace.”
-
Puss had been most of the way through with washing all the mud from his fur when the wol- Lobo made a reappearance (as he’d seemed to have disappeared several minutes prior; there one second and gone the next as if he’d just up and vanished. Granted Puss hadn’t been paying close attention, so maybe the sentient irritant just sauntered off the second he’d looked away), then had the gall to swan dive into the lake near enough to Puss that the once again orange cat had been well within the splash radius.
Okay yeah, no. Puss decided he was not going to put up with this shit just because the guy was good looking, and the plan had been to tear him a new one for his transgression, but found the words dying on his tongue when he saw the wolf’s water-slicked form crest the surface of the lake and he found himself captivated as he watched the water droplets travel down the muscular physique. He quickly caught himself and about-faced, blushing as he hoped his bout of staring had gone unnoticed; otherwise that would be extremely embarrassing. It was bad enough he’d actually called him handsome during their initial meeting.