Your hands bleed Wine while I Cry.

by Swag_Panda

Summary:

After a disagreement occurs in the chain, Hyrule reflects.

[Please note: The original fic will be in the second chapter and the first chapter will be the new rewritten version!]

Notes:

WARNINGS TO CONSIDER:
This fic is based on the implications that God/Jesus is a thing in Hryules land based of the multiple references to the religion through LOZ:TAOL originally having an item titled "Bible" (being renamed to "Magic Book"), having an actual cross item and being depicted with a cross on his shield thus the fic being inaccurate to any actuality of the religion of Christianity. This is a projection fic meaning there are things in this piece of fiction I personally believe but many of it is just that. Fiction. This is not meant to insult anyone but if it does I will not take this down or apologize due to my personal experiences on the topic of religion. Any mentions of Gods and Goddesses with result with capitalization on both the title and their names for respect. Please exit this work if you are uncomfortable with this (Christianity being referred as a fabrication of the people). If you feel this work is missing any tags please let me know and I will add it.

Thank you, and enjoy.

Chapter 1

Notes:

This is the rewrite (which is sadly shorter than the original)

The Calatian native listened to two of his brothers in arms discuss a dreaded topic to the traveler. The Goddesses. There was a..bit of a debate that started to get less than calm. There was a question that loomed over the group of eight like a cloud filled with a vicious storm waiting to strike. The Skyloftian defends the Goddess of light, having the most knowledge on the woman. A small argument rose when the Goddess’ name was said. Legend was adamant that there was no goddess by that name and that instead there was once a group of people known as the Hylia.

Before the two could go on any longer than they already had (seriously…twenty minutes was just excessive) the Veterans attention was pulled away from the brunette Knight by Warrs’ striding beside him and letting out a good-natured insult. Legend chuckles before firing back with his own. Sky was left to huff in clear aggravation before picking up his pace and walking beside their youngest brother, initiating a conversation in order to get his mind off his anger. Silently, Hyrule was glad no one had ever taken note of his clear avoidance of the subject. That despite always being one to assist in mediating disagreements, occasionally using the light of a spark of lightning to pull attention away from any possible physical altercations. He made that a habit after the one time two of the oldest got into a shouting match, which to this day they refused to elaborate on, had led to a deafening smack before quiet tears began and a string of apologies ensued.

Circling back to the original point, Hyrule has never enjoyed the discussions of goddesses or even any other holy belief. On the rare occasion the subject was brought up Hyrule would keep his lips shut tight and his eyes away from the people speaking, He never cares to be seen as disrespectful in those moments, only caring to block out the words that burrow inside his mind like worms and Ropes.

Hylia and even the Golden Three have been long forgotten by Hyrules own time, instead they created religion. They wrote a book on a ‘God’ and their child Jesus. These were who they built their religion on. They worship them as if they were real people and not characters made in a desperation for answers to the unknowns of their world. To represent their creation,t hey wear rosemary and carve crosses out of dead bark. All his life Hyrule has prayed to this fabrication, put hope into it, and now to know of goddesses that are undeniably real…he feels anger. While he cried in realization that his faith was waning the goddesses watched and gave no sign. The day his shield which branded a holy and golden cross cracked..his faith did as well. Anything he tried to regain the sense of devotion to a being that does not even exist had never worked, Nothing. Nothing at all. The goddesses watched.

The Goddesses let the hero Legend speaks of perish and in turn doom the seasoned heros and Hyrules own lands. They allowed their lands to be cursed and tormented by the result of a single man's death. If they goddesses were so loving and kind then how could they watch a world burn and even flood Winds world. Their gaze is cold now that Hyrule knows they have been breathing down his neck this entire time. Forever out of reach from souls crying out for salvation. Hyrule wants none of it.

He wishes to abandon religion. To abandon Christ. To ignore the Goddesses and their supposed mark on his hand. (A mark he will forever associate with hyrule and only hyrule. Those beings will not take that away from him) But he can’t. No, the urge to just play along to gain the acceptance he desires. He needs to be accepted…wanted..treated as an equal. If he were to ever walk away from it he would be shunned, heavily questioned and worst of all they would try to guilt him and scare him with words of damnation.

Just thinking of it makes him want to scream. It makes him want to-

“Hyrule! Dude, where are you even going?? We’re finally setting camp get over here!” A voice rang out and pulled the adventurer from his thoughts. It was a voice that was now unmistakable to Hyrule, it belonged to Legend. He turned to face the blonde and can feel his face flush in shame as his ears flick downward. Of course, there he went again, getting lost in his own mind and he just had to lead his family to practically chase after him. Hyrule watches the others arrive to the scene..all with varying expressions of confusion and concern.

It took a moment for Hyrule to realize someone had been speaking, it seems he wasn’t truly broken from his thoughts. So clearly he can see more concern than confusion on their faces. Great. Just fantastic even. Leave it to him to worry hsi brothers far more than he ever wanted (which is not at all but that’s apparently too high of a bar).

“‘Rule, you okay?” Goddamnit, Twi’ sounded so worried for his well being. He couldn’t even find it in himself to feel glad he cared that much considering he couldn't get fast the fact he has to know how much he cares. He should respond. He has to. He doesn’t want to. Honestly, it’s kind of funny how everyone wants someone to listen to them but the moment they get that someone or those people they suddenly can’t get the words out. At least, that's how it was for Hyrule.

He looks at Legend for a moment before his eyes flick back to Twilight, “Ah- sorry guys I..zoned out.” Nothing but the truth left his lips but he still can’t help but feel that wasn’t quite the right thing to say. Not with all the trouble he caused. Absently Hyrule listens to Time mention a river nearby and something about sundown and food. Thankfully, whatever the presumed oldest had said took attention off him as the group began dishing out duties. He watches an interaction between Wild and Twilight but doesn’t bother to really listen, still preoccupied by that off feeling he feels from his earlier thoughts.

Legend walked over to Hyrule to raise his arm and ruffle the taller teens' hair. The teen adorned in far too many rings huffs out a quiet chuckle before speaking, “If you ever feel like sharing what had you aimlessly wandering like that, just know I’m all ears.” Before Hyrule could figure out how to respond, Legend walks off. Hyrule feels a small smile form as he watches him walk off before turning to do whatever he was assigned.

And after some time Wild had finished dinner. It smelled delightful and looked pleasing even though it was only a stew of meat and vegetables. Voices over lapped as bowls were passed around. Hyrule stayed silent, his old thoughts returning once more. It felt as though the cross hidden beneath his tunic became tight enough to choke him. Rationally he knows nothing is really happening but god it feels it his airway is truly being constricted by the necklace. Perhaps its punishment for such sinful thoughts he thinks when prompted. A punishment for his lack of faith. Later he’ll pray for forgiveness even though he knows such a thing is pointless.

Dinner goes by with laughter and occasional shouts and it seemed to have gone by so quickly and yet so painfully slowly. Hyrule was almost tempted to take up Legends offer but it felt like in an instant they were all preparing for bed. The travelers own rest was dreamless and did little to rejuvenate him before the sailor had woken him up for second watch.

 

With a yawn and a sigh he takes over as the young teenager practically throws himself onto his bedroll. Wind fell asleep fairly quickly, leaving Hyrule the only one awake. Wordlessly he stares at the sky and the moon blankly. Without removing his gaze from the heavens Hyrule reveals his cross and clasps it tightly in his hand for just a moment. Afterwards he slips from the log he sat on and lands on his knees. He claps his hands together and thinks of what to try and pray for. Protection he requests, and a delay in the next encounter of any black-blooded beast. He asks God for these things knowing they won’t answer. They never have. No matter how much he tried and no matter how desperate he was. He knows of goddesses that watch him and do not interfere. He continues to pray for if he does not he’ll go to hell. That's where anyone who does not praise the Lord goes. That's what he’s been taught and what he wishes to forget.

Biting his cheek, he tears his eyes away from the cloudless sky allowing the night to go on as if that moment of weakness never occurred.

Notes:

Comments and constrictive-criticism are always welcomed and Kudos are appreciated especially considering this is a rewrite!

Chapter 2: Original Version!

Sky and Leg’ are once again engaged in an argument due to their conflicting opinions of the Goddess above, Hylia. The Skyloftian states despite her mistakes she does truly care and is trying her best as the Veteran counts with the thought of her ‘best’ is simply not enough and her part in all of their suffering is inexcusable. They have been going back and forth for about twenty minutes by now! Though, luckily, Warrs’ finally pulls Legend from the discourse by a good-natured insult to certainly gain the man's attention allowing him to cool down in a much better way than he would’ve found himself (read: repeatedly stabbing the compact dirt risking foot injury). Sky simply huffs as he walks closer to those in the front to converse with their youngest brother. Hyrule is quite honestly surprised no one has noticed nor cared that these types of arguments have never been broken up by the teen, who always tried to minimize conflict considering there was always the off chance of it escalating physically. It had only happened once and it was nothing more than a slap followed by a string of apologies and tears.

Circling back to the original point, Hyrule never responded to any conversation of the Goddess, no matter who was discussing her. In fact, he’d subtly fasten or slower his pace to get farther from those speaking of her. And if it was everyone? He’d simply keep his eyes forward and his mouth shut tight, for he and his home were not like the others in many more ways than just one. One of those things are their beliefs and who they worship. Of course Hyrules hyrule worshiped the Three goddesses but after the Fallen Hero had failed and doomed the land it left many enraged. They cursed Hylia for her poor choice of a hero, they shouted how she failed them. Those people lost their faith in the Goddess and scowled at her statues with hatred. They created someone new to worship. A person named ‘God’ and their child Jesus. They built religion. The land was split on if this creation was a mockery of not just Hylia but all of the Goddess but those who adopted the religion dubbed Christianity. They wore Rosary and carved Crosses from dead bark. Barely any choose to worship all beings, L̶i̶n̶k̶ Hyrule was one of the few. He fought for the Goddess and adorned the symbol of Christ, a shield gilded with the Holy Cross and Rosary that was worn underneath his tunic. He worshiped and prayed to his God and Goddess.

His heart weighs heavily for once he turned Fifteen he felt dismay as he realized his faith had waned and now no longer knew who to worship, his already cracked shield branded with such a Holy symbol gets destroyed during a panic leaving him to spiral further. Why believe in a person that 𝙙𝙤𝙚𝙨𝙣’𝙩 𝙚𝙫𝙚𝙣 𝙚𝙭𝙞𝙨𝙩?! Why disrespect them in such a horrid way he had done? His chest hurts with not only confusion but anger. While his faith is challenged in God and their child due to the two being fabricated by the people, his diminishing faith in the Goddess was fueled by pure unfiltered rage for he knows she and the other Goddesses are real. 𝗪𝗮𝘁𝗰𝗵𝗶𝗻𝗴. Too far to reach out and grab their hands.

Hyrule doesn’t want to believe in any of them, the very thought makes tears prick the back of his eyes and generates anger deep in his bones. But it simply isn’t that simple to choose and allow others to know one does not believe in what everyone else does. He felt, no, feels pressured to continue believing in the figures that stare down at him. He wants to stop, to curse their names, to allow all see that he does not respect their almighty figures but stopped by the desire to pray and play along. 𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗱𝗲𝘀𝗶𝗿𝗲 𝘁𝗼 𝗯𝗲 𝗮𝗰𝗰𝗲𝗽𝘁𝗲𝗱, 𝘄𝗮𝗻𝘁𝗲𝗱, 𝙩𝙤 𝙗𝙚 𝙩𝙧𝙚𝙖𝙩𝙚𝙙 𝙖𝙨 𝙖𝙣 𝙚𝙦𝙪𝙖𝙡. For if he is honest surely he will be shunned and questioned. They will try their best 𝘁𝗼 𝗴𝘂𝗶𝗹𝘁 𝗵𝗶𝗺, 𝘁𝗼 𝗳𝗼𝗿𝗰𝗲 𝗵𝗶𝗺 to listen to their words.

He feels resentment, he feels anger. Both the Goddess and God breath down his neck, 𝗮𝗹𝘄𝗮𝘆𝘀 𝙬𝙖𝙩𝙘𝙝𝙞𝙣𝙜, never answering his prayers. The prayers that may spark even a semblance of true faith. But nothing is ever said or done for 𝙂𝙤𝙙 𝙞𝙨 𝙣𝙤𝙩 𝙧𝙚𝙖𝙡 and The Goddess is a damn sadist. She enjoys his suffering, doesn’t she!? If Hylia is so 𝗸𝗶𝗻𝗱 why hadn’t the Fallen Hero succeed? Shouldn’t she have never allowed such a thing? Why had Gannon ever gotten the chance to grow as powerful as he did? Why does he have to fix it?
𝗪𝗵𝘆?
If she is so 𝗹𝗼𝘃𝗶𝗻𝗴, why does he have to fight? How come she never stops the endless hunts for his blood and corpses?!
𝗜𝘁’𝘀 𝗻𝗼𝘁 𝗳𝗮𝗶𝗿.

Hylia’s statues seem to 𝗳𝗼𝗹𝗹𝗼𝘄 any place he goes as if they move towards him the moment he turns his eyes away from the stone creations. 𝗛𝗲 𝘄𝗮𝗻𝘁𝘀 𝘁𝗼 𝘄𝗲𝗲𝗽…𝙝𝙚 𝙬𝙖𝙣𝙩𝙨 𝙩𝙤…𝙝𝙚 𝙬𝙖𝙣𝙩-
“Hyrule!” A voice slices through his thoughts leaving him startled. When had he gotten so long in his mind? “The voice spoke again, “Dude what the hell? Never mind why you decided to wander away from us again, why in Hylia’s saggy tits did you keep going when we were gonna finally set camp?!” Aside from the voice, the vocabulary was unmistakable. Legend had been the one to pull him from his thoughts. Hyrule felt his ears droop and his face flush in shame, how could he lose his grip on reality so severely he caused his brothers to essentially chase after him, in fact he now that he’s regained proper consciousness he could see not only legend but Twilight, Warriors, Wind and even Time standing close by and behind the Veteran and he could hear (and even see) the others coming over…they’ve arrived, all with varying expressions of concern and confusion.

There was an unnatural silence until Hyrule realized he just hadn’t been listening, they were even worried now. He never meant to make anyone worry but here he is, making everyone worry. Great. Fantastic even. “Hyrule, seriously, are you alright?” Din-Damnit, Twi’ sounds so concerned with such a pained look on his face. Hyrule takes a small breath before finally answering, “I’m sorry guys…I just..” Words shouldn’t be so hard to say but they feel like swallowing bricks whenever you think about truly opening up, don’t they? He starts again after seeing the patient look on Legends face, “I zoned-out and had no idea I was walking so far…” The teen lowered his head a smidge, he hadn’t lied but it still felt wrong, especially added to all the trouble he’s caused. Time looks around for a moment and reveals a rather small smile. “Well at least we’re closer to the river now. We’ve got four hours, fifty-three minutes, and twenty eight seconds until sundown so we better start setting camp and start up some dinner,” spoke Time. And just like that the attention was taken off of Hyrule and put into setting up and drawing blades of grass to see who’s the pair that will be gathering firewood despite Wilds reminding them of having wood in his Slate. Which of course led to Twilight reminding him they were saving the wood for emergency fire before shaking his head at the glint visible in the 117-year old pyromantics’ eyes.

Legend walked over to Hyrule and raised his arm to ruffle barely taller teens' hair, huffing a small chuckle. ”If you feel up to sharing what was plaguing your mind, I’m all ears,” he quietly told Hyrule, causing the Traveler to smile. The shorter walked away before he could think of a possible replay or before Warriors noticed he was being ‘soft’. After a second of thinking, Hyrules smile grew larger as he came to the conclusion there wasn’t a replay needed, not even a stuttered thanks was needed. He walked over to his brothers and started queering them to see if anyone was injured, greatly or minorly. There were no injuries sans a bruise on Fours arm that the blacksmith hadn’t even realized was there. It helped calm Hyrule immensely as it meant he hadn’t harmed any of the others by wandering so far or hadn't heard someone getting injured. But his mind was still fogged for all of that though his faith always left him rather uncomfortable and exhausted. Even when he sat by his brothers who were chatting and waiting for Wild to finish dinner, Hyrule felt like his Rosary was choking him out. Punishment for his lack of faith in a person only his land has created. He’d pray for forgiveness but he knows it’s pointless.. Bowls started being passed around, they’ll be eating a meat and vegetable filled stew tonight, and soon everyone had a bowl and utensil.

The fire's roar was drowned out by the nine heroes' conversations. It seems despite traveling with the men that have become family for months, he’d never get used to the warm feeling of sharing meals, passing time with stories and games, being unafraid of the smoke born of flames. He may never get used to the warm and 𝘴𝘢𝘧𝘦 feeling his family has given him. He’ll forever be grateful for the warriors that surround him. Though he fears he may ruin that.
He’ll ruin it if he shares his 𝘀𝗶𝗻𝗳𝘂𝗹 thinking. So he won’t, even if Legends' offer no matter how tempting it is. When did Hyrule put his spoon onto his lap? He must’ve zoned out again. Slightly shaking his head, Hyrule quickly continues to consume his stew. And before he knew it, it was time to sleep as Wind had the first watch.

The Traveler's sleep was dreamless and had done little to rejuvenate him before he was woken up by the sailor for his turn to take watch. It doesn’t take long for Wind to crash, leaving Hyrule alone in the land of consciousness. Hyrule stares at the sky and moon so hard that if anyone were awake they'd think he’s mimicking Time whenever they land in Wilds hyrule. He reveals his Rosary and clasps the cross on it, his breathing shaky. He releases the necklace to clasp his own hands, kneeling on the dirt. He should pray. He doesn’t want to. He wants to ask God for protection and to delay any encounters of the black-blooded beasts. 𝗕𝘂𝘁 𝘁𝗵𝗲𝘆 𝘄𝗼𝗻’𝘁 𝗮𝗻𝘀𝘄𝗲𝗿. 𝗛𝗲 𝗸𝗻𝗼𝘄𝘀 𝘁𝗵𝗲𝘆 𝘄𝗼𝗻’𝘁. He can feel Hyila 𝗹𝗼𝗼𝗸𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗱𝗼𝘄𝗻 𝗼𝗻 𝗵𝗶𝗺, pitying him but ultimately doing nothing to help. He’s tempted to ask her but he knows all she’ll do is laugh. He should pray, he’ll go to hell if he does not praise the Lord he reminds himself, despite knowing 𝘁𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝗶𝘀 𝗻𝗼𝘁 𝘁𝗿𝘂𝗲. 𝙏𝙝𝙖𝙩 𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙧𝙚 𝙞𝙨 𝙣𝙤 𝙨𝙪𝙘𝙝 𝙥𝙡𝙖𝙘𝙚. In the end he does not pray, feeling the Goddesses gaze as his Rosary weighs him down.

The troubled Traveler tears his eyes from the cloudless sky, allowing the night to go on.

Notes:

Once again, do not be shy to inform me if you feel this work is missing any tags so I can add them!

Comments and constrictive-criticism are always welcomed and Kudos are apricated.