Risen

by InkyIbis

Summary:

The Black Cat is supposed to be in the shadows. Destroying what won't be missed, observing and carefully pouncing before retreating back. To see the Black Cat too much is an omen of terrible, history-crushing events about to come.

It was necessary though, to call the Black Cat to destroy the risk that Hawk Moth poses to the world. What a wild miraculous could do to all of humanity.

In light of recent events though, it might be too risky. Such destruction must be used with greater concern lest calamity occur.

Notes:

And I'm back! This is basically a direct continuation from where 'Awaken' steps off- only really like, a week between then and now.

So, well, enjoy!

Chapter 1: The Mime

The notes elegantly dance around one another, a beautiful swirl of music from the four hands gliding over the keys.

Adrien wonders what emotion the piece is meant to inspire. Nino would probably know, music is all about emotion to him. What can he make in the given moment, energy and momentum. Whereas Adrien usually has memories and people tied to his music.

It sometimes irritates Nino. That he’ll ask Adrien if something’s a fun piece, and Adrien’s trying to unclench his fist because it reminds him of what someone was playing while he was waiting for a train and he found it to stomp on the exhausted remains of his patience.

Father continues to play this piece with him. Completely unaware of the real and stolen peacock brooch tucked in his pocket, and Adrien tries to keep his previous train of thought alive rather than feeling guilty about it. Father said the book was returned- his punishment transferred to keeping him home for the week and his phone given back- so hopefully Father’s in a better mood.

A good enough mood that Adrien will be able to go see Mylene’s father perform tonight. Adrien promised everyone he’d try, and he really wants to see them all after a week of staying shut in and only going out the single time Hawk Moth sent out an akuma- and a lack luster one at that, they parted ways only ten minutes of him getting out of the house- and for patrols.

Which, after a few disagreements between him and Ladybug, were sort of awkward.

It really isn’t that big of a deal. Most of Adrien’s frustration about the whole thing comes from that he couldn’t really explain that about why he knows the book the Collector wanted was so important to the miraculous without giving away that he had a really thorough look- which limits his identity pretty much to only who he is.

So he lied and said he broke in-

(and Ladybug was really upset about that, but she was upset to begin with because that fight was hard on her and she kept babbling on about how hurt someone got and how she needed him and he wasn’t there- Adrien never really seems to be there for the people who need him- and the whole thing was just hard and sad and now all their conversations are just… heavy)

-to see what book could be so important to get someone akumatized.

Adrien was under the assumption that a simple hint that this book had clues and Ladybug would be all over it. He even proposed his video idea so that they’d only have the book for an hour tops, they’d return it before Gabriel Agreste would know it’s gone. Especially since Adrien would just volunteer to do this himself, using the excuse he knows how to break in, and just not do that and send the video he already has.

It was a great plan.

Instead, she said that it would be better not to pursue it. After all, it’s quite possible and probable that experimenting too much with the miraculous likely got this organization destroyed. They’ll only use their miraculous only as strictly necessary to stop Hawk Moth and nothing more. She consulted Tikki about this, (although why would Tikki know more when Plagg doesn’t have any answers) and says this is the safest way for them.

Still, despite her clear wishes, Adrien can’t stop thinking about how to convince her of it. Especially since he’ll have to do it soon since he can’t spring his ideas and working theories- experiments, really- that he had even before the book. And if he does crack anything before she’s on board, she’ll assume he went behind her back to do break in and record the book anyway.

Which isn’t true if he did it beforehand. But Ladybug can’t know that to protect his identity. And it could probably be assumed that he is kinda going behind her back by still pursuing this even though she doesn’t agree.

But, once he can make her understand what an edge this would give them over Hawk Moth, he’s sure she’ll be happy. And then they’ll have so much knowledge that Hawk Moth won’t know what hit him.

So it is using the miraculous as necessary to stop Hawk Moth, she doesn’t… Ladybug just doesn’t see it that way yet.

Blinking the thoughts away, maybe this piano piece is meant to inspire conflict with the ones you care deeply about, they finish the piece with a flourish. A flourish that makes him very glad he was practicing piano while watching Nino play Skyrim, if he kept it abandoned like he did the first month or so of being Chat Noir, he would not have stuck the landing at the end there.

Father smiles- just a soft touch of upturned lips but that’s such huge improvement that Adrien’s face splits as joy tingles and races through him- and folds his hands over his lap. “Your mother loved that piece.”

“I feel like I can hear her singing when we play. It’s soft, but, well, it’s like she’s still here.” Only soft notes, barely there compared to the real thing, but it’s not nothing. She’s not gone.

“Yes, well,” Father’s smile falls as he stands, “She will forever live on as long as we fight to keep her alive in our hearts.”

“Then she’ll be here all our lives.” Adrien stands too, sensing that the is the moment to ask before Father’s good mood leaves further. “Father, I’ve been asked to go to a performance that one of my friend’s father will star in. The Mime’s Extraordinary Adventures, at the Eiffel Tower. I, I want to ask if I can go, but I completely understand if I’m not allowed to.”

Father hums, “That isn’t too dangerous, as long as your bodyguard goes, but why do you wish to go at all? You’ve never shown an interest in such performances.”

Yeah, he isn’t entirely sure how he’ll show his interest in this when he finds it all quite boring, but that’s only his problem if Father allows him to go.

“I… I’m afraid I’ll be distracted in class if that’s the first I’ll see everyone again. I wish to get it out of my system in a more controlled manner.” Adrien smiles sheepishly and looks down, “After all, since noticing that my emotions can blindside my logic if I’m not prepared, I thought that at least predicting and controlling the setting will allow me the time I need until I can discipline myself.”

Father raises an eyebrow, and then his face softens towards him. “That’s very good son, an Agreste should always strive to be in complete control. Very well, I’ll tell Nathalie to rearrange your schedule for tonight, perhaps I’ll be able to accompany you as well, and you can return to school next week.”

“Thank you,” Looking back up, trying to control his grin at Father coming with too, Adrien pushes his shoulders back. “I’ll make sure to have myself under control soon.”

Nodding slightly, Father pats his shoulder before leaving.

The moment he does, he headbutts Plagg. “He said yes!”

“Way to go Kit!” Plagg does a loop in the air and then tugs on a strain of his air. “Come on, this requires celebratory cheese!”

“You think waking up should have celebratory cheese.” Rolling his eyes, although pulling out the cheese regardless, Plagg immediately swipes it from his hand.

“And I’m completely right, your head’s just too far down in the sand to realize the truth when you hear it.”

Chuckling, Adrien pulls out his phone and texts the group chat with an all-caps ‘he said yes’. It looks weird, especially with that many exclamation points. He almost doesn’t send it, but Alix said that looking at his texts makes her feel that Miss Bustier is about to correct hers and he needs to loosen up a bit.

Instantly there’s a bunch of celebration gifs and emojis sent from some the class. Adrien doesn’t expect much else from them- he’s learning that group texts have an etiquette of their own mainly because of multiple texts from Alya and Nino telling him to knock it off before he starts grating on nerves- but his phone continues to buzz from Marinette, Nino, and Alya.

Even one from Chloe, saying that she’s caught up in queenly activities but warns to not let the peasants get too close.

He reads them all, but instead of wanting to text out all the replies- he has no idea how people can stand texting all day long when it’s impossible to do anything else- and FaceTimes them all at once.

“So did you do what I said?” Alya gets on first and adjusts her phone, setting it up in her kitchen as she moves around it. “I was right, wasn’t I?”

Nino pops on next, one ear on a headphone and the other off. “I don’t know what she just said, but take it from me dude, it’s always best to just agree with Alya.”

“Shut up Nino- so, come on, I do want to hear that I was right.”

Adrien smiles at them, “You were right. I mean, I was right too, because I do feel a little bad about it, but it is mostly the truth.”

“Dude,” Nino eyes are focused hard on something beyond the camera, “This one event is not going to cover all the things that Imma tell you in class.”

“And why is it again you can’t just tell me now?”

“Some things gotta be in person. And class isn’t more important.”

Marinette pops on, her face appearing for a single second before she turns off the camera. He’s never figured out why she’s uncomfortable with the camera on but, considering that he usually does it after a photoshoot, he figures she has her reasons.

“On principle I’m going to deny that, but, well, maybe for the first day back, there can be an exception.”

Alya snorts, “You say that now, Sunshine, but soon enough we’ll get you to the point where every day is an exception.”  

“Don’t listen to her Adrien.” Marinette pipes up. “You won’t need to do any of that stuff once Gabriel Agreste sees that you’re happy and perfect just as you are. Uh, wait, I mean that-”

“Thanks Marinette,” He smiles at the phone, maybe cutting her off because her trying to fix her sentences usually only makes them more confusing, before he turns on his computer. “Let’s just hope that day’s sooner rather than later. Besides, I think that maybe-”

His words fizzle out at the alarm coming from his phone. He stamps out his grin when the akuma alarm goes off. This will be good. Another chance to talk to Ladybug and make everything better because he’s going to stop pressing the book issue until he thinks of something perfect. Another chance to go out and do something good. Another chance to be Chat Noir and be free and have fun.

“Ah!” There’s a thump from Marinette. “Sorry guys gotta go, Mom always wants me down in the bakery in case we need to help people.”

The line disconnects only seconds before Alya, with a manic grin, picks up her phone. “And I have a bug to catch, see you guys later!”

“Alya-” Adrien rolls his eyes when she leaves- “How can she have no self-preservation?”

“Dude, even after dating her, I don’t have a clue.” Nino shrugs, and because he doesn’t go running into danger, turns back to his computer. “So, wha’daya think we should do to celebrate? Actually, don’t answer that. We’re getting pizza afterwards. Get you on a good diet.”  

Adrien grins, “How do you know what my diet is? It’s on a knead to know basis.”

“Dude,” Nino snorts, his whole face crinkling even as he rolls his eyes at the camera. “That was awful.”

“You’re just upset that you can’t get a slice of this action.”

“Noooo,” Nino laughs through his groan, “It’s soo bad.”

“Hey, don’t be jealous. Music’s your thing, but my doughmain is wit.”

“Oh my god, how?”

“I’m punstoppable.”

“Kit,” Plagg pokes his shoulder, “I’m getting feta up with this.”

Adrien cracks and starts laughing along with Nino, shaking his head and reluctantly pushing back. Hopefully Ladybug is in a good mood today too and will crack a few jokes back at him.

“You are such a dorkosaurus, dude.”

Winking at Nino, Adrien holds a finger up to his smile. “Shh, don’t let anyone in on the secret. I have a reputation to maintain.”

“No sweat dude,” Nino smiles back, but then frowns when Adrien gets up. “What’s up man? Do you have to go too?”

“My lessons weren’t for another hour, but the akuma will probably get it cancelled and Nathalie likes to do these things immediately.” Adrien shrugs and avoids the camera. “But hey, give me an hour tops, and I’ll be back. I’ll get done as soon as possible.”

The frown disappears. “I am so holding you to that. And I will be a menace in class tomorrow if you don’t get back to me.”

“Oh, please,” Adrien smirks at him, “I’ll be so much worse.”

Nino blinks, but Adrien ends the call before he gets sucked into anymore banter with Nino. As much as he hates saying goodbye to his friend, it would be wrong of him to keep his lady waiting any longer for him.

“Claws out!”

Inhaling as the energy snaps over him, clicking into place, Adrien bounds out of his room with ease. And to think, a simple year ago, he could only stare out that window and long to go out into the beautiful day. Now, with some help from the impossible, Adrien gets to touch that whenever he wishes.

“Bugaboo!” Adrien leaps on top of oversized monstrous akuma- and it looks strangely familiar, has he seen this on tv before?- and yanks on the large scaly ears to drag it away. “The day always gets better with you around!”

Ladybug smirks up at him. “Wish I can say the same Chaton!”

“Me-ouch!” Landing next to her, Adrien presses a hand to his chest and leans away from her. “How could you do this to my poor heart?”

“Ah ah ah, Kitty!” Ladybug flicks his bell and starts swinging her yoyo. “You know the rules, no messing around until after the akuma is dealt with or the Gremlin is gonna get you!”

Adrien brightens when he finally places what the large akuma is- he saw it on Nino’s living room tv one of the times he (snuck out) went over there. “That’s what this is! It was on the tip of my tongue!”

“Then you clearly don’t have any small children in your life.” Ladybug jumps and dodges the Gremlin’s attack.

It’s a simple akuma. And after Anansi, Adrien does have some worries about to why Hawk Moth is even bothering with these ones. At least with Mr. Pigeon, Hawk Moth is usually trying to probe them and study how they work. Yet with these ones, what is he trying to do?

Oh well, it’s extra practice for them and these simple ones mean that Adrien can have some fun without having to worry about Hawk Moth winning.

Adrien catches the victim- only a kid, Hawk Moth is truly a sick bastard- and they blink up at him, only flinching when they hit the ground.

“Miraculous Ladybug!”

Hmm, another time doing that without him. While it’s good that Ladybug knows how to since there have been times where he wasn’t able to come (he’s so sorry Father), they talked about this. It’s better to do it as a team to make sure they don’t miss anything and so she doesn’t have to take the burden of all of it.

“Chat Noir?” The eyes widen and a huge smile bursts on their face. “Chat Noir! Mommy, it’s-”

The kid looks around, the large smile quickly shifting into a frown, and thank goodness Ladybug swings by and scoops him up. “Don’t worry, little kid, I’ll take you to your Mommy. Once you get to fly that is.”

The kid gasps, eyes back to the starry awe before. “Ladybug…”

Ladybug smiles softly at the child before turning to him with a raised fist, “Pound it!”

“Ladybug,” He grins and leans on his baton before she swings off, “May this alley cat have a minute of your time before you leave without a whisker?”

She shakes her head with a smile, “Sorry Kitty, you’ll have to wait until patrol. I’m quite busy.”

With a zip she’s off and Adrien runs off before any of the reporters can get too close to him. He doesn’t use his baton, instead jumping in sheer defiance of physics. Grabbing onto the side of the building, Adrien leaps up even more. His entire body rippling with the power, soaring up over the roof.

He doesn’t stay in the shadows until he needs to, letting Paris see his strength and power, and he smiles at the gasps and shouts from under him.

After all, he usually doesn’t let people see him after a fight as he practices his stealth. Yet, well, Paris should see their heroes after all this time waiting for Hawk Moth’s end to come.

“Claws off,” Adrien stretches, sighing and swiping a piece of cheese for Plagg before flopping back down onto his chair. Not even twenty minutes have passed, so he goes through his email. Only Nathalie sends him anything, but he needs to know everything in those emails.

His entire wardrobe is going to be changed, and he won’t be allowed out if he doesn’t meet specific standards of appearance. He won’t have to do any PR with Chloe anymore at least. But it looks like Adrien’s declaration of becoming more mature also translates into taking a more active role as a model for Gabriel.

Thankfully, Father made no mention of having to travel and be the face of the summer campaign again. Or for the fall campaign. They likely already have a model in mind for the summer campaign at this point.

He marks them all as read so Nathalie won’t bug him later about it when she checks. Yawning, Adrien opens up some of the documents she sent. Which, staring at the title with no small amount of dread, is confirmation about being more active in the company. It’s practically an essay about important figures.

Adrien calls Nino.

“Dude, you’re back!” Nino props his camera up, his right hand clicking with the mouse. “Here, listen to this and tell me if it’s any good. It sounds… wrong.”

“That’s probably because you made it.” Adrien says, wondering if he’s reading a new language as he tries to comprehend the document.

Plagg snickers, which is never a good sign.

Glancing at him, the little creature shaking his head at him through his crackling, Adrien looks over at Nino. Who’s shuffling and looking distinctly uncomfortable and frowning at beyond the camera.

“OHMYGOD!” Adrien slams his hands on the table when he realizes what he just said. “I didn’t mean it like that! All of your work is awesome! I could never dream of being as talented as you are, but, well, everyone’s their own worse critic. That’s what I meant. So, like, it only sounds wrong to you because you were the one to make it, not because you make bad stuff. I would never- I love your music way too much to ever think it’s bad.”

“Dude, okay, I get it.” Nino raises his hands and drags one down his face. “Man, and here I thought you were done stumbling around like this.”

Sighing in utter relief that Nino no longer seems hurt by this, Adrien scratches his neck. “Well, I like to think I’m getting better.”

“You literally just proved otherwise.”

“Yeah, yeah… can’t you just let it go?”

Nino snorts, “Nope. I clearly have to stay around for the long-game, and the only way you’re getting better is if I tease you.”

“Why, Nino,” Adrien sighs dreamily and presses a hand to his heart. “I always hoped my savior would mock me.”

“You’re such a drama queen, dude.” Nino looks away and plays the music. “Anyway, come on, listen.”

The phone doesn’t do the best job at capturing and playing Nino’s music- it always sounds so much better listening with the speakers Nino has in his room- but Adrien enjoys it regardless. The upbeat music has his hands twitching to grab for a baton that isn’t there, ready to swirl and dance over the rooftops with Ladybug as he sings wildly, and he’s smiling along.

The track drops and swings, and Adrien flinches.

Nino turns it down, “Hm, is that too aggressive? I liked that part but-”

“No, no, it’s fine, really.” Adrien waves it off. “It’s objectively good. I’d like it the first time I heard it.”

“First time? Dude, did you break into my laptop last night or something? I can’t believe you didn’t say hi.”

Tapping at the desk, Adrien sighs with his decision. “You did that same sorta thing as the Bubbler.”

Nino does deserve to know that. It’s not fair for him to think of it as bad when it’s only Adrien that has such strong memories attached to that day. Maybe he shouldn’t be surprised or disappointed in himself when he’s messing up Chat Noir or taking risks that barely get them through. After all, if he had just transformed the moment he saw the Bubbler, then he wouldn’t even have a reaction to this.

“Yeesh,” Nino stiffens up, “That was- uh- yeah, okay so-”

“Tell you what, buddy.” Grabbing his phone, he refuses to let that stupid mistake of his ruin a good song. “I’ll help you out another way. Start it over again.”

“Or- uh- really don’t have to- I could uh…”

Sitting at his piano with the phone resting on top, Adrien cracks his knuckles. “Play it, come on.”

Nino mutters out, “If you’re sure…” and the music starts over.

It’s easier to mimic the sounds with his eyes closed, and it just isn’t possible to think about what the music means to him when he’s focusing like this. In all reality, Adrien’s mostly sure he’s butchering it since the piano can’t replicate most of what’s coming out of the phone, but he plays along with it, his own flair instinctively bleeding through.

Opening his eyes when the music stops, the piano ringing as his fingers stay pressed into the keys for the finish, Adrien smiles down at his hands.

Improv is surprisingly fun, and he didn’t even think about the Bubbler.

“So…” Adrien picks up the phone, “Did that help? I definitely went a little off the track at some point, but, well, at least now-”

“Dude, dude that was great! Thank you so much!”

“For playing your song badly on the piano? Because if that’s all it took, then anytime dude, happy to help.” Adrien puts the phone where the sheet music is meant to go and gets a good look at Nino doing… something very passionately on his computer.

“No, no, it was great.” Nino says, not even looking away.

“Hmm, sure, and Ladybug is Hawk Moth.”

“Yep! It was awesome.” Nino curses softly, “Hey, play along with this part?”

“Go for it.”

Adrien plays, probably doing something different than the first time since he can’t remember, and the piano stumbles back into silence when Nino cuts off the music in the middle of what he was doing.

“Okay, okay, awesome, cool, cool and if I do this then…”

Adrien chuckles, “Do I need to give you and your music some space? I can leave if you want me to.”

“What, no, dude-” Nino jerks his head to the phone, even if his eyes dart over to the screen. “I can do this at any old time. It’s not important.”

Okay, that gets an eye roll. “Sure Nino, it’s not like you’re going to be on the Challenge in like, a week, for that one extremely specific and important skill. You can practice whenever. No big deal.”

“I mean…” Nino’s shoulders fall, sighing with a nod. “I guess you’re right.”

“I could stay on call if you need my amazing piano again.” Something in Adrien’s chest loosens when Nino perks back up with a grin. “Only if you want me to, that is.”

“Yes!” Nino clears his throat. “I, er, yes. That’d be good. I’d like that.”

“And you called me the dorkosaurus.”

“Shut- shut up.”

Dutifully doing as he’s told, Adrien does move back over to his computer. It sucks having to read the document, but he keeps at it. If Nino asks him to do something, then he’ll be far along into it and doesn’t have to panic about getting it done later then.

Although his future self better be really thankful for this, because reading this flat-out sucks. Adrien’s eyes might be drying out that’s how dull and boring it is.

Twenty pages go by, and Adrien’s scared to look at how much if he has to go. One the on hand, if there’s only five more left, he’ll power through it and be relieved. If not, he thinks he’ll lose all hope that he’ll ever meet Father’s standards and will be forever shut in again.

Plagg yawns, stretching out from his hair, and moves over his forehead. “Wow, Kit, no wonder your Father is the way he is if he likes that stuff.”

“I know, right?” Groaning, Adrien rubs his eyes to try to work some moisture back into them. “Why do I even have to read this? I’d rather live in the sewers forever than ever take over anything in the company.”

“Um… what?”

Ah, yes, Nino is on call still.

And judging by the way Plagg’s laughing, one of them remembered that.

“Talking to the demon on my shoulder.” Sighing, Adrien props his head up. “Please tell me at least you’re having a good time.”

“If you’re thinking about living in the sewers, I can guarantee I’m having a better time.”

“Hey,” Adrien grins, thinking about how his little hideout now has quite a few water bottles, snacks, and even some cushions he managed to smuggle down after patrol. “I bet it wouldn’t be the worst living down there. I bet I could figure out some way to have fun.”

Nino snorts, “I’ll let you borrow my shower.”

“I’m sure I’d get nose blind eventually.”

“Not the rest of us, dude. I’d sooner just let you stay at my house than deal with that.”

Sighing, like having a sleepover that long wouldn’t be the best thing ever, Adrien frowns and nods. “I guess I could live with that. But the sewer cats are probably better mannered that Noel.”

“Noel wouldn’t scratch your eye out over a dead rat.”

Neither would the sewer cats. They seem to like him well enough. Granted, that may only apply to him. If and when he ever brings Ladybug down there to show her what he’s learned, he should warn her about that.

Hmm, Carapace hasn’t been called again yet for a fight. Although they did bring him along on patrol with Rena to see if they could all work out decently as a team- which seems like it’ll be a Sunday thing from now. And, since obviously everyone loves Nino, there’s a chance he’ll be as well known and active as Rena is for a temp hero. Which means it wouldn’t be unreasonable for Chat Noir to trust him and then eventually show him the hideout.

Yeah, one of these days, Adrien is definitely going to change Nino’s mind about the sewers.

He could probably do it faster if he tells him he’s Chat Noir. Plagg doesn’t even seem bothered by the idea anymore, but Nino also hasn’t been tested for that long. Adrien… he’ll just feel it out a little longer and see how it goes.

“But they’d also leave me alone. And that-”

The knock at his door interrupts him, and he instantly shoves his phone face down when Nathalie opens the door. “Adrien, we’re leaving. Be ready in five.”

“Of course, I’ll be right there.” Adrien picks up the phone and shrugs to Nino. “Sorry man, duty calls. I’ll see you later though, kay?”

“Of- of course,” Nino swallows, and his smile suddenly tense. “I’ll see you then.”

Getting ready doesn’t take long, Adrien does check that his makeup is still good- his late runs and growing insomnia issues have formed bags under his eyes which is ridiculous because he feels fine- and gives Plagg some more cheese before they go.

It seems that Nathalie has to run some errands for Father and that’s why they left early, and Adrien takes the opportunity to nap.

When the akuma alarm goes off and wakes him up, Adrien mentally groans. There hasn’t been two in one day for a while now. Not even when Hawk Moth was trying to exhaust them the week before winter break. It’ll probably be an easy akuma again because of that. It must be difficult for Hawk Moth to do this without much time to recover.

Adrien was looking forward to tonight as well.

His reluctance comes to a halt- along with the car- and he opens the door.

“Get out of the car everyone and hide!” Ladybug orders, eyes trained forward. “I’ll cover you…”

She blinks, losing her face of concentration as she looks at him. Adrien looks back, freaking out because that’s not a normal face and suddenly trying to remember if she’s ever seen him outside the mask- shit, shit, there was that time with Father’s akuma- and if it’s at all possible that she’s trying to break through the glamor.

The window shatters, and that breaks the spell. Ladybug grabs him and swings him away towards cover. She hesitates, looking back at him for a horrifically long moment, and smiles. “Stay safe.”

“Oh thank god,” Adrien sighs against the pole and leans further back into the shadows. “That was close.”

“Ugh, doesn’t Hawk Moth have better things to do?” Plagg yawns, completely uncaring of Adrien’s almost heart attack. “I wanted to be a spectator tonight.”

Spotting a flannel blur, Adrien sighs. “Wish Alya thought so too. Come on then, claws out!”

First priority, scooping Alya up and away from the akuma. “Sorry miss, but this show isn’t open to the public.”

“Oh come on, I don’t even have my phone with me! I just wanted to see!”

“I’m not that gullible.” Setting her down, Adrien waves before bounding off towards the fight where, despite seeing nothing, Ladybug is getting dragged closer and closer to the akuma. “Hey! Paws to yourself!”

The akuma is humanoid this time, though Adrien doesn’t understand the purple skin. Does Hawk Moth wish he was an alien or something? Just let the normal human shaped akumas have normal skin, geez.

Extending his baton to sword length, Adrien charges as the akuma pulls out… nothing from his side. Well, this looks like it’ll be easy. Not surprising since Hawk Moth put out another akuma not that long ago.

His baton screeches against nothing when he brings it up to attack. But it certainly isn’t nothing when a sharp tip rips through his suit and his shoulder bursts into a gush of pain.

“Ah!” Kicking, the pain numbing and suddenly filled with a brimming need to hit and drive the akuma back and crushed into the ground. Adrien focuses on how the akuma moves to see the invisible sword before driving him back.

The akuma frowns and gestures strangely in front of him which isn’t going to stop him. No way, this akuma is going down.

“Chat Noir! Wait!”

He slams headfirst into something staggering backwards at the impact, clutching his throbbing forehead.

The akuma smirks at him before… Adrien thinks they might be opening something. A car, considering how they sit down and start driving away. Man, okay, he could probably cataclysm the wall, or maybe just go over it.

Ladybug’s yoyo goes straight through it, and she catches it next to him. “He can only create one thing at a time.”

“Oh great,” Adrien reaches up to hold his shoulder, it’s starting to hurt now that he isn’t fighting- and the wet warmth instantly flowing into his hand puts off his mood for saying anything cheeky. “I always hated the idea of Hawk Moth making an akuma that rips off yours.”

“What? This isn’t anything like my powers.” Her eyes dart over to where he’s holding his shoulder, frowning.

“Don’t worry about it,” He rotates the shoulder, ow, but he still has movement. “It’s not bad. But I’m not wrong, he can create anything. It’s the closest one we’ve seen yet to you.”

“Yes, but I can create solutions to win.” Ladybug winks at him, “He can’t.”

He smiles, and then it drops once she zips away. Shoot, despite what he told her, this is likely to be painful.

Clenching his arm as he grabs his baton, squeezing onto it hard with both hands and suppressing the urge to vocalize any of it. It’s fine. This is fine. Ladybug needs him. So it’s time to go.

By the time he catches up, Ladybug looks like she’s a newborn bird trying to fly with how she stumbles and holds onto the car. A newborn bird that’s flying low enough to crash into several people.

Gritting his teeth, he throws his baton into the road to stop the invisible car and lands on three limbs.

The shock of the land is fine for everywhere except his shoulder, all of it this squishy mess of tingling and burning that doesn’t hurt that badly but is also rapidly making it impossible to use his left arm very well.

Ladybug falls and she throws her yoyo up. “Chat! Follow the bus!”

“If you wanted to play fetch, LB, you only needed to say the word.” Adrien grabs his baton and vaults after her, mentally making a note to pack the highest grade of painkillers he can into his baton for future use.

“I’ll stop the bus, you keep him busy and try to get that hat!”

“Um, maybe I can do the bus part?” Adrien falters at the sight of his blood dripping down when he makes a turn. Uh, maybe he should be concerned about that. It looks very concerning.

“You’re better at hand-to-hand combat.”

And with that Ladybug reaches the front of the bus, and with nothing preventing the akuma from plunging whatever invisible thing he has into the ceiling, it’s up to him to stop that.

“Hey,” Adrien kicks him off balance and holds his baton up, tucking his left towards his back so he doesn’t even think about using it. “I’d like a rematch. Say nothing if you agree to let me win.”

The akuma rolls their eyes and starts swinging at him. It isn’t Anansi levels of difficulty, most of his moves are very showy and Adrien can tell he doesn’t have any real training behind them like Nora did. However, since Adrien can’t see his sword and has to make all his predictions based on how he’s moving, it’s a bit struggle to keep up.

It’s also getting harder to move. Not in a muscle achy way or he’s been hit too many times, but it’s like his body just isn’t responding with the speed and strength he’s used to.

The bus slams to a halt, and Adrien definitely knows how to arc in the air to land on his feet.

The execution of that… well, it doesn’t work and now his face is throbbing.

Pushing himself up to see what’s happening, he stares at the slowly growing red puddle by his elbow. It doesn’t look like a whole lot, but well, all of that should still be inside him and seeing it distinctly not inside him is making his stomach turn.

Something hits him, and by the feel and his rising frustration that every movement just gets him further tangled, Adrien’s going to guess it’s a net.

“CATACLYSM!”

He spits out the word, focusing the power into whatever’s keeping him down, but nothing goes away. The power is funneling into it- he can feel it- and pushing more and more into the net does nothing. Which is so stupid! He is destruction! This is just a stupid net that doesn’t even really exist!

Thrashing, no no no, will he NOT just be held up and stuck because of this, he starts clawing. Focusing his powers into just one spot, hoping that’ll give him some give, but nothing! Nothing and he’s still just trapped! His limbs tangling and shoulder jabbing out pain but who cares about that when he can barely even move because he’s stuck!

Trapped! Gasping, looking around at how Ladybug’s fighting the akuma, he can see it. He can see it and he can’t even help her because he’s stuck here and can’t get out. He’ll never be able to leave and- and-

Okay, spiraling. He’s spiraling. Gasping, but slightly deeper now, Adrien tries to figure out something to do. Surely, he can do something. He just needs to figure out what that something is so he won’t be stuck here anymore and can actually do something rather than just watch it all happen and be totally helpless to everything if something goes wrong and that’ll be his fault because he let some stupid net trap him.

Still spiraling. Still gotta stop that somehow. Or, Adrien can do that second, priority one is do something to help Ladybug. He’s a superhero. He can obviously do that. A net against a superhero. It’s obvious who’s superior here.

Or, as it takes a lot of squirming and hissing just to grab his stupid baton with his arms all caught up, it should be obvious.

Adrien looks, focuses on Ladybug’s fight for the moment, and extends his baton. Using all his will and panic to make it extend as instantaneously as possible.

The hat goes flying off the akuma’s head, and Ladybug jumps up away from the grasp of the akuma while using her yoyo to bring it to her. It’s an incredible feat of coordination that looks exhausting and impossible just looking at it.

Destroying the akuma, the net finally breaks under his cataclysm. Which, whoa, his swims a bit and he relies on the sudden screaming from the mute akuma to guide him. Forcing all his energy and the ring’s into moving forward, but it just doesn’t go that well and he feels bad for making it a few seconds slow to the akuma.

“Hey,” Adrien blinks when the guy’s face taps his mind as he gives him a hand up. “You’re… you’re that guy. The mime guy. Right?” Adrien squints, trying to force his vision and memory to come together. “Or maybe you just have one of those faces.”

“I am, or was, but oh my gosh-” The mime guy jerks back away from him- “You’re bleeding!”

Adrien looks down at his shoulder. It’s hard to see any blood, darn black suit, but the vivid red comes out as it dribbles down onto the concrete from all his fingers.

It’s distinctly quite concerning.

“Good thing Father doesn’t know about this!” He chuckles weakly at the man and Ladybug, clutching the wound to try and slow it down. “I’d be soooo grounded. And like, he just let me out again. So, Ladybug, if you’d please.”

She thrusts her hand out, and together they say “Miraculous Restoration” as it should be.

Sure, it makes him really tired- especially when Ladybug’s creation sensing powers can’t help him destroy all the blood he left around town- but this is the proper way to do things. It’s not like Ladybug would be able to destroy his DNA all over town with her creation powers.

Adrien still feels awful, but the tingling warm- close to burning- wet sensation is gone from his shoulder.

Grinning, he holds his fist up to Ladybug.

“Why didn’t you tell me you got stabbed?” Ladybug throws her arms to the side. “I thought- you said it wasn’t anything big! I could have gotten another hero!”

“There- there wasn’t time. And it really didn’t feel that bad-”

“Do you know how much blood you just lost?”

“Uh…” Adrien has never really read up on blood lost. He figures the excess exhaustion is from that. And it’s not like he’s feeling faint. “It t’was but a scratch. I pawmise it looked worse than it was. We still got the job done, didn’t we?”

Ladybug stares at him for a long moment, almost a glare, definitely picking him apart. He resists the urge to squirm though. This is just like how Father looks to make sure he’s alright. Nothing… nothing else. It’s just like that.

With a sigh, she looks down and softly mutters. “He really does have destructive tendencies….”

“Uh… Ladybug?” His chest tightens, something squirms in his stomach, and he can’t really say why his throat is getting tighter. “You’re, you’re okay too, right?”

“Of course I am, just thinking about grabbing Carapace and Rena if there’s another akuma soon. Just in case you lost more blood than you think.” Ladybug smiles and waves, “Bug out!”

She leaves and Adrien quickly does the same, not wanting to be around others for how his internal organs are quivering inside him. He’s fine this is fine everything’s fine. But everything feels really wrong and after a week of getting that feeling out, he really wishes it wasn’t around anymore.

Didn’t he just prove he’s being a good superhero? Didn’t he fight when it was hard? Hasn’t he proved he’s a good son and friend? Why is he feeling like this at all?

Groaning, Adrien mutters the transformations off and flops on his couch. “Okay Plagg, what do you want? Because I’m about to order as much food as humanly possible from the kitchen.”

“Um, Kit? Might want to take a look around.”

Adrien sighs and looks at his very normal room. “Do you me to send a glowing review to the interior designer?”

“This is not where you transformed.”

Adrien blinks.

“SHIT!” He jerks up and runs to his desk- he’ll just grab some of his emergency snacks- and instantly his balance and eyesight completely vanish.

“Shit!” Clutching his throbbing forehead, Adrien takes a deep breath on the floor. “Claws out.”

Things get a little easier transformed, enough so that he can eat and run and jump out the window without feeling like he’s going to lose his footing. Which is very necessary for him to get to where he needs to be.

And damnit, he still has that tracker wristband thing on him. He really hopes that when he’s found, it’ll be ignored and no one will bother looking at it. But, as he pushes himself harder to go faster, they might be looking at it now to try and find him. He really needs to find some sort of solution to deal with that.

Adrien gets to where he was dropped off by Ladybug and leans against the wall before he calls off the transformation, sliding down it when his legs shake on him.

“Whoa, Kit, easier there.”

“Plagg,” Adrien breathes, as deep as he possible can, and it feels like he is only taking the most shallowest gasps of air. “Why?”

Plagg rolls his eyes. “Maybe it’s because you need blood and as powerful as that ring is, it can’t be blood? And like, transformations still wear on a body even when it’s in good condition?”

Hmm, that’s a good point.

Standing up, keeping a hand on the wall for support, Adrien walks out into the open and heads to the car. Hopefully no one has their camera out. His throbbing forehead does not make for great PR, especially the same day that Father asked him to be more presentable. Which is the least he can do after the theft and how Father’s making a greater effort to be with him.

The quivering of his guts gets worse.

It’s a great relief when his bodyguard is suddenly in front of him, Nathalie tailing behind.

“Adrien, where were you? We’ve been looking everywhere.”

“Wow, really, because I’ve been looking for you guys.” Adrien shrugs, and has he always sounded like such a bad liar? At least it doesn’t sound like they used the tracker. “Not near the car, wasn’t sure if the akuma was still around, but glad that we’re all back together.”

Nathalie sighs and nods, straightening up. “Yes, of course, we’ll return to our tasks. We’re quite behind now.”

Nodding, Adrien gets in the car, takes another poor deep breath, and passes out.

 

“Adrien,” Nathalie shakes his shoulder, and for a brief moment, he hates her for that. “You need to get up.”

Raising a hand up to his forehead, which feels tender and he decides to ignore the general throbbing, he opens the door. “Is Father here?”

“Oh, no, he said that something came up. But he still reserved seats for you, front row, you’ll have an escort.”

“So, you two are going back as well?”

Nathalie glances away and nods.

“Alright!” Adrien gets out, and he supposes that this was the original idea after all. “I’ll text for a pickup.”

“Pssh,” Plagg floats by him as they move through the crowd. “Your dad is such a party pooper. I bet he’s reading those stupid papers since he thinks those are fun.”

“Come on, be nice. At least I don’t have to read that many.” Adrien mutters before grinning up to his escort, who, without a word, leads him forward.

His friends are likely scattered about, but Adrien knew that he’d never be able to sit with them because Father would only tolerate front row. The whole plan is to get together afterwards. Nino, Alya, and Marinette said they’d try to get front row using Mylene for help and since Marinette fixed his hat, so hopefully that works out.

It’d be a nice to see them again. To actually sit next to Nino again. To not be alone again.

“Your seat, sir.” The escort inclines his head and leaves, and Adrien thinks it’s a great seat. There’s three of them empty next to his.

It’s also, when he sits in it, super comfy and he really wants to fall asleep again. Maybe, maybe he can just close his eyes for awhile. Until the show starts or his friends get here at least.

“Ah, Kit, it’s nice to see my wisdom rubbing off.” Plagg curls up in his hair, grooming it. “Any time is a good time for a nap.”

Adrien hums his agreement.

“Hey,” Plagg tugs at some of his hair, “Your friends are here.”

He almost says that was fast, but then he realizes Marinette is right next to him when she definitely wasn’t before.

“Oh, Marinette, good evening.” He smiles and yawns, looking up at Alya and Nino walking over.

Nino looks really grumpy, almost pissed actually, and Alya scowls at him. Which, no, Adrien does not want any friend tension or arguments. No. No way. Out of everything in his life feeling like he’s messing it up somehow, he wants his school life to at least be normal and good and not horrible.

“Is…” He looks at Marinette, because Marinette is great at relationships and people to a degree he can’t really comprehend. “Is everything alright with them?”

She smiles at him, beaming actually, and doesn’t say anything.

“Um…” Adrien’s shoulders drop when Nino sits the farthest from him. It isn’t a big deal, someone else had to be on the end, but well. He wanted to sit next to Nino.

“Don’t sweat it Sunshine,” Alya leans forward as all the lights dim. “We’ll talk after the show.”

Adrien smiles and settles into his seat, trying not to feel weirded out by Marinette. She’s… she’s already apologized a ton of times about the book and everything, saying she never meant anything to get so blown up by it, and is probably just happy that his punishment’s over.

Because he is out of the house and he is with his friends, and that’s something to be really happy about.

Although, admittedly, he does doze a couple of times through the performance. He was personally involved in his own action that left him quite fatigued and well, he never really did understand the appeal of mimes.

The intermission startles him, the lights turning on but still quite dim around them, and Adrien stretches. Then, resisting the strong urge to simply sink back into the chair, Adrien stands. His sight swims slightly, not bad enough for his balance to die on him, but he turns around to grab Nino’s arm.

“Hmm?” Nino gets up, stiff from seating too long. “What’s up?”

Adrien hugs him. “I never really got to thank you for last week and it’s been killing me.”

“Anytime, but you said that enough.” Nino hugs him back, still kinda tense, and Adrien wishes that they were somewhere not so public because he just- he really just wants to hug him.

“I mean it though,” Pulling back, unfortunately, and looking at Alya and Marinette, he beams at them. “You guys are the best friends I could have ever asked for, and if you ever need me for anything, know that I’ll always have your back.”

Alya nods, “In that case, my price for helping carry your broken self away from your akumatized dad is the newest phone.”

Adrien smiles, “I didn’t mean it quite so literally or with my Father’s money, but I’ll see what I can do. Did something happen to your phone?”

“You could say that,” Alya rolls her eyes and ends it with a look at Marinette. “And, just so you know Sunshine, I expect the same treatment.”

If only she knew how many times he’s carried her away from an akuma attack.

“Well that just goes without saying.” Adrien turns to Nino, because, as much as he likes the girls, it’s Nino who’s his very best friend and the one he doesn’t want to imagine ever having to leave. “I’ll always be around for you guys, no matter what.”

Nino’s face darkens with a blush and he looks away with a small smile, and Adrien’s smile grows as he looks back to the others. It’s always fantastic to know that he holds special place with Nino as Nino does to him, and just knowing that makes him smile.

Marinette looks ready to melt too- that must especially hit her hard after her innocent actions spiraling out of control- and Alya’s got a small grin of her own. It doesn’t even look that devious, which is a first for her.

“Oh,” The lights dim, and Adrien reluctantly goes back to his spot. “Guess I’ll have to save my other dramatic declarations until afterwards.”

He gets some snorts and chuckles, probably an eye roll from Nino or Alya, and settles into his seat. Already the urge to fall asleep is swelling back up, and Plagg’s purring does not help matters.

The clapping wakes him up, oh man does he hope no one asks him questions about any of this, and he starts clapping too. All the noise makes Plagg grumble- and it’s making his forehead throb even worse so hopefully the bruise isn’t too bad- and his phone buzzes in the middle of it.

He sighs at the texts, so much for hanging around to talk to his friends, he will at least linger with them as much as he possibly can.

“Well,” Alya stands and stretches, “That was great.”

“Yeah…” Marinette sighs, and she’s looking at him. “Really fantastic.”

Oh, does she want his opinion? Shoot. “Yeah, it was good.”

There. Not too enthusiastic where he would be expected to say what he loved about it, but also not necessarily bad either. A neutral answer. And he is pretty neutral since he only has pictures of what happened between his blinks of awaking up.

Alya snorts and grabs her friend’s arm. “Anyway, we gotta bounce. I need to head to Marinette’s before home, and it’s already pretty late.”

“Bye!” Waving and getting waves back, he turns to Nino. “I technically have to leave, but well, I’m going to use the crowd as an excuse for as long as I possibly can.”

“Hey, I’d flat out run away if I were you. I don’t know how you don’t have cabin fever by now.” Nino shrugs, stiff again.

“I have tricks to get me out of my mind. And,” Adrien nudges him, “I got you now. Especially today. It was nice having you there, but like, I could also get things done.”

Nino looks at him, “You know you can always leave if you do have things to do. I’ll put up resistance, obvi, but like, you should go if you have to.”

“Yeah, I know, but I like hanging out with you.” The crowd thins too much, and Adrien moseys his way out. “A few shabby performances are worth that.”

“I-” Nino swallows and tugs on his cap- “Did you really mean that? About, like, being friends no matter what?”

“Absolutely.” Adrien’s hand twitches, and he ends up following through and squeezing Nino’s shoulder. “I don’t know- if there’s something I can do or not, but I mean that with everything I have.”

“Okay, okay, cool. I- I know that, I do, it’s just, I guess- well, no. I know that this can be a game changer, but that’s what’s important. Friends first.”

“Best friends first, always.”

Adrien says that, like he isn’t completely freaking out. Nino looks extremely uncomfortable- so impossibly tense that he isn’t even fidgeting with his hat- and it clearly has something to do with their relationship. Adrien thought they were great. Sure, they had a few rough moments. Nino acted weird for about a month. Adrien took his entire night basically after the Jagged Stone concert. But they got through all that. Adrien would take ten times worse that and still have Nino’s back because Nino deserves it no matter what.

But, well, just because he’d has Nino’s back doesn’t mean they’re best friends. Which Adrien is still completely confident on. It’s just that this is weird and new social territory and he doesn’t know what it means.

Nino gestures them further away from the crowd, and Adrien can’t help but notice how the darkness secludes them. Is Nino trying to be stealthy about something? No, no, it’s probably not to that extreme. Just… some extra privacy. Nothing that concerning. Right? Probably.

When Nino takes a big deep breath, Adrien finds himself swallowing.

“So, okay, I- what I want to say is-” Nino looks up at him, shoulders steadily climbing up and words rushing. “And I know that you might not have all this stuff figured out, but well- I- I-got-a-crush-and-like-it-doesn’t-have-to-change-any-”

His bodyguard clears his throat- jolting them both about a foot into the air- and Adrien just stares at him in a vague recognition. Vaguely realizing that this is potentially an out from this conversation. Since as much as he doesn’t want to let Nino down on this (oh his crush, crush, Nino has- does-), as much as he wants to say something to help him out, Adrien’s chest feels really weird and his thoughts are all weird and that’s probably just the exhaustion and hungry and dehydration and it’s all creating this headspace where this is just… bad. Too much.

“Oh, uh, sorry Nino, but I have to go.” Adrien takes a step back, hating how Nino recoils like he just got punched.

“Wah- wait! I- But- You don’t have anything to say? Nothing?”

Adrien winces and shrugs, he doesn’t have any insight on- on crushes and especially thinking about that with Nino and he doesn’t want to let him down but- “Sorry, I’ll do the best I can to be, uh, your wingman? Yeah, I’ll try my best, but I really have no idea about this stuff and I do have to go. We’ll talk it out at school, yeah?”

Nino recoils again, at least not punched looking instead more in surprise, and Adrien can live with that. He turns around to follow his bodyguard, pleading at him with his eyes that they walk fast before Adrien can make things worse somehow.

“Adrien! Dude!” Nino runs up beside him, eyes still wide and generally flustered, and grabs his arm. “I meant that I-”

His bodyguard grunts and scowls at Nino, and Adrien places a hand on him. “Hey, don’t worry BG, he means nothing by it.” Turning to Nino, he gives his friend a sheepish smile. Not even a fake one at the sheer confusion and achiness that’s happening. The only thing fake is the intensity. “Look, we can call in the morning if you’d like, but I really have to go. I’m sorry.”

Nino looks up at his bodyguard and lets go of him. “Okay, um, sure, yeah, that’s- that’s fine. I guess. Um, la-later.”

“Later,” Adrien nods, and it feels awful to leave Nino like this. “I- I’ll see you later Nino.”

Nino nods and then disappears back into the crowd.

With a sigh, Adrien continues back into the car. He was expecting to fall asleep again, if anything he feels even more exhausted than before, but his eyes remain stubbornly open and his mind feverishly active the entire time.

Adrien isn’t even thinking of anything in particular. He tries to keep all his thoughts out. Which maybe is a really bad friend thing to do- he’s even only grunting to Plagg whenever he says anything once Adrien gets to his room- because clearly Nino is trying to ask him for help about this. Maybe he needs help to see if this person’s even interested, maybe this crush is a guy and Nino doesn’t know about who they’re attracted to.

Besides, after what Nino said about their friendship and everything, maybe he was making sure that Adrien really is cool with him dating a guy. Which, of course Adrien’s fine with that. Why wouldn’t he be? Did Nino really think that Adrien would try to tell him who and who not to have a crush on? Adrien can’t make those calls for Nino.

Laying in bed, exhausted and needing to sleep, Adrien stares up at the ceiling. He doesn’t really want to think about this. Thinking about this is making his chest do more of that aching and pulsing thing that he really doesn’t like and he’d much rather just go to sleep because this can’t be happening and maybe he’ll wake up and it’ll all be a bad dream.

But what a horrible thing for him to even think! Nino deserves to be dating someone! Nino’s, like, the absolute greatest! But what if this other crush doesn’t like how clingy Adrien is? Adrien wouldn’t have thought he’s particularly clinging a couple of weeks ago, he isn’t like Chloe, but, well, there was that day with Lila and Adrien hated being away from Nino for just a few classes.

What if that upsets this crush? What if they ask Nino to stop being so affectionate with him?

His chest seizes up, and Adrien hates it. Hates them. He wants to absolutely destroy anything that would take that away.

But he can’t. He can’t because it would be Nino’s decision to date this person. Nino’s decision to respect their wishes. While Nino could chose not to, he also could and then Adrien would respect that- because of course he would since he doesn’t ever want to make Nino uncomfortable- and then Adrien would go back to not having that and that’s awful.

What’s worse is if he has to see it though. If he has to see Nino throw his arm around someone else. If he has to see him lean in to tell one of his stories or try to make them laugh. If he has to see how they get all of Nino’s love and care.

If Nino starts turning him down for calls because he’s giving more time to someone else. If Nino no longer asks him for help with his music because he has someone else. If Nino just doesn’t tell him as many stories because he doesn’t want to say them twice and of course this crush will hear them first.

It’s wrong to be selfish and greedy to be thinking these things and feeling them burn in him. He knows that. He knows that and he especially shouldn’t think he’s entitled to any of that from Nino. He isn’t. All of what Nino does isn’t his. He’s not entitled to it. But god how it would be torture to see someone else getting it. How he could do nothing but long for it because it would be so out of place for him to try and demand it if Nino isn’t freely giving it.

And Adrien should even be supporting this! If this is what would make Nino happy, then Adrien will do this. Because Nino deserves to be happy. He deserves to be with the person that makes him happy. Adrien shouldn’t get in the way of that. This is all just a bunch of stupid hypotheticals anyway. Nino could be with his crush and absolutely nothing will change.

But then again, maybe everything could. Maybe Nino said all that stuff about being friends because he wants to affirm that still be friends even if he has someone new in his life. Someone new that will have a special place with Nino, someone new that may take some of what Adrien’s grown to love and cherish.

Maybe he wanted to make sure that Adrien knew that they were friends because their friendship is going to take a step back for this new one. Maybe he told them not as some weird way of seeing if Adrien’s okay with it, but instead as a warning.

Inhaling, suddenly desperate for air with his tightening throat, Adrien stares up at the ceiling and tries not to cry. Because after everything, after working so hard and being so happy being with Nino, it doesn’t matter. He’s going to lose parts of him anyway, and there’s nothing he can do about it.

A few tears leak out, and barbed wire twists around his heart. He isn’t Nino’s crush.

It’s wrong of him, so very wrong, to wish Nino was his. To try and force Nino’s affections onto him. But for tonight, remembering all the wonderful ways Nino makes him feel and knowing they are all about to be ripped away from forever, Adrien’s way too tired to try to be right.

After all, there’s nothing he can do about it anyway. He can’t be perfect to win Nino over. He’s never been… enough, for anyone like that. And he doesn’t want to think about that, so he’ll just sleep.

Chapter 2: Dark Cupid

Notes:

A long one! But long overdo for Adrien and Nino! Enjoy!

The akuma alarm goes off.

Grabbing his phone, feeling all different kinds of crummy from physical to emotional, everything just feels worse that it’s three in the morning. Nothing good ever happens at three in the morning. The best thing that can happen is just sleeping straight through it.

“Claws out…”

Not even the transformation feels good. Which is a crime that of course would happen at three in the morning. That this horrible time can even make turning into a superhero feel awful.

Groaning, Adrien goes out. This is what being a hero means. Pushing forward even when he doesn’t want to. So, if he wants to start feeling like he actually is a hero, he should probably start by doing his job even when everything is awful and it’s three in the morning.

And doing his job sometimes does mean hiding in the shadows and simply watching the akuma before attacking. Sometimes a direct attack shows what the akuma is like and how to fight. But sometimes simply watching can give that same information and, as a huge plus, doesn’t require the same physical exertion at all.

“I am Sleeper.” The akuma looks distinctly like a type of shade or ghost, somewhat translucent and a wispy tail instead of legs, and speaks with that same undead haunting tone. “All worries, all hardships, all the pain will go to sleep.”

Frowning, since if he assumes the victim is roughly the same size as the akuma, that means that Hawk Moth likely akumatized another kid.

Adrien doesn’t know exactly what he wants, but Hawk Moth must be soulless to do this to children. To take advantage of them.

Even Adrien can sympathize with having certain things go to sleep. That urge for it to end, at least for a little while, and the hope that it’ll be easier after waking up. This isn’t a petty or angry akuma like how so many are, this is just sad. Some child’s desperate and impossible plea shaped into this.

Especially since the akuma’s powers isn’t just mindless destruction. It’s a bit scary that they float through walls. But Sleeper simply floats into the apartment where Adrien can hear the yelling coming from, and it stops. The couple don’t fall to the floor unconscious, so Sleeper must be able to abstract things, like arguments, to rest.

It only gets worse when Sleeper puts someone back to sleep after screams abruptly come from a window. As someone who suffers from nightmares too, Adrien really would appreciate it if someone could come in and wipe that all away. Allowing him to relax and try to sleep again.

Ugh, the angry ones are better. They’re so much more black and white. It’s clear how Hawk Moth is clearly using the butterfly miraculous for evil. This is probably what the butterfly miraculous is even for. Reaching out to someone to help them fix a problem, not to force them to follow along like a mindless puppet.

Granted, Adrien is under no illusions that Sleeper will start fighting them once they see him or Ladybug. But right now, watching them help people because of something they too were struggling with, it makes him hate how Hawk Moth is using these powers to increase conflicts.

Adrien hears Ladybug’s approach and goes to meet her before Sleeper hears her.

He blinks at Nino, slowly turning to Ladybug. “You got Carapace now? Why?”

“I think that answers the question.” Ladybug frowns, “Do you not remember?”

Right. Right. Ladybug got concerned with his lack of blood. Since Ladybug couldn’t recreate his blood since it didn’t get damaged or anything, just misplaced, he has to heal normally. So she thinks it’s good idea for another hero. And of course she would pick Nino tonight instead of Rena, because it’s three in the morning and everything is awful.

“No I do, I just…” Adrien sighs, “I can really sympathize with the akuma this time. God I’m so tired. Three in 24 hours? Does Hawk Moth sleep? Actually, better question, does he have a life?”

“Amen to that.” Ladybug sighs too and turns to Nino. “Don’t worry Carapace, this should be easy then. Hawk Moth won’t be able to draw on his powers to make a tough akuma. So, what do you know, Chat?”

“Sleeper has the power to make anything sleep. Arguments settle. Nightmares brushed aside. It’s physical touch from what I can see, but they can also move through walls at will.”

Nino nods, “Oh man, I am jealous. Sleep would be awesome.”

Slumping, because of course Nino is up tonight thinking about his crush. Valentine’s is coming up. Adrien completely forgot about the holiday until a couple of hours ago, until he realized all these changes were going to be happening this freaking Monday, and that’s probably why Nino said something tonight. It’s so he can prepare a confession or something equally amazing and thoughtful because Nino’s amazing and thoughtful like that.

“Carapace, your shell should still be able to stop Sleeper-”

“You’ll probably need to focus on what you’re protecting from or Sleeper can go through it.”

“-but only do that if it looks like one of us is about to go down. Until then, we all need to keep our distance until we can find out where the akuma object is.”

“Well, if it’s an object…” Nino frowns, “How can it go through walls? Could Sleeper leave it somewhere?”

Ladybug hums, “I didn’t think of that. We might need to play that route.”

“Eh, probably not the case,” Adrien shrugs, “We shouldn’t worry.”

Nino shrugs and nods, immediate support which is good so that hopefully they can finish this faster and Adrien doesn’t have to look at him and wonder how much of Nino will he be denied now, but Ladybug frowns at him.

“How so?”

“Oh,” Adrien blinks, did she really not know? Was this something he figured out from what he could tell from the book or just his observations? “You know how it’s our minds and bodies and souls that our powers mesh with?”

“Yeah.”

“Wait, hold up, what? Mesh with our souls?”

“Distance matters. Like if I’m trying to destroy something big, it doesn’t matter if it’s got the density of air, it always takes a lot more of a push to destroy that farthest corner. I have no idea how Hawk Moth can make an akuma, maybe it’s just a special power of the butterfly, but as the port of his power, it can’t be too far from its host or there would be too much strain on him and his victim.”

“So,” Nino clears his throat, “That means shells are easier to put up close.”

Adrien nods, “Yeah, blow your bubbles close and they’ll be harder to pop.”

“But then what could this be?” Ladybug hums and paces. “Did you notice if Sleeper changed at all after putting something to sleep? Maybe they can gather energy?”

“It’s possible, but I didn’t really see…” Adrien wasn’t looking for that. Which sucks because he’s supposed to be a hero and he can’t even give a good recon report.

“Okay!” Ladybug pounds her fist against her hand. “I got a plan. I’ll keep Sleeper busy until I can figure out where the akuma is, then I’ll shout out where it is. Chat, you’ll come in and destroy it. You think you can do that even if they’re incorporeal?”

Adrien thinks about it and nods, “This cat has got it in the bag.”

“What do you want me to do?”

“You’re backup, Carapace. Shield us if we’re about to go down or if I’m baiting the akuma. Stay close in case the plan changes.” Ladybug takes her communicator out. “We all good?”

“Yep,” Adrien takes his out and secures it in his normal human ear, “We’ll be on your tail, LB.”

“Um, actually…” Nino pulls out his shield with a frown.

“Here,” Adrien puts his hand out and mentally reaches out to ask Wayzz to give the communicator. He pulls back his hand and offers it to Nino. “Your shield won’t be as effective with this out, but you’ll be fine.”

Ladybug frowns at him, “How did you do that?”

“I asked Wayzz.”

Now both Nino and Ladybug are looking at him weirdly now, which, did he say something wrong already? Ugh, he’s too tired to figure it out.

“I can talk to him?” Nino pats his suit, “Is he still awake? Oh man-”

“Not really awake, but, I mean, he’s still there-”

Ladybug shakes her head. “Chit chat later guys, let’s go put Sleeper to sleep.”

Nodding, Adrien breathes in the shadows as Ladybug zips through the street. Nino stays behind him, painfully loud and bright in his senses, and Adrien hopes that Ladybug’s brighter and more distracting that they won’t be noticed.

Nino falls a few steps behind him rather quickly, and Adrien pauses while keeping his ears on Ladybug.

“Oof,” Nino bumps into him, “Sorry, I swear I can see in the dark, but you’re just hard to make out.”

“Get on my back, it’ll be easier that way.”

It’s actually torture this way. Nino doesn’t give a complaint, even if he can feel the slight shake in him because Nino is literally pressed up against his back with his legs and arms crossed on his chest with only magic between them.

Rolling his eyes at his own brain for doing that to him when he’s Chat Noir right now, Adrien creeps back along the shadows. He has to go faster to catch Ladybug, but even with that he feels much more hidden than with Nino bumbling behind him. Nino’s suit and miraculous might not be the best for speed and stealth- he wonders if it’s better than Ladybug’s- but it doesn’t matter like this. Adrien wraps them both up in shadows, padding silently with his hands and feet as they stay hidden in the background while Ladybug fights Sleeper.

When they stop, watching the fight from about as Ladybug engages in front of the Eiffel Tower and uses the open space to her advantage, Adrien tries to focus on her quips as he sneaks in closer. But none of them make any sense. He can’t possibly focus on it when Nino’s breath is skirting over his neck and jaw. When his arms and legs flex slightly to keep their grip.

Why even is Nino still hanging on? They aren’t going fast anymore!

A small but very insistent part tells him to not disturb it. Because Adrien won’t be getting this anymore. Because this is probably the closest he’ll ever get to Nino now that he has a crush. Because even if this is wrong, then at least he can selfishly take it without affecting Nino’s relationship.

“Ah! So your butterfly is in your bracelet!” Ladybug jumps away from akuma, and Nino immediately scrambles off to run beside him as Adrien sprints out. “I’ll just put it to sleep!”

Her yoyo goes through the wrist, and then Sleeper grabs it to jerk her forward. Reaching out-

“Shellter!”

Ladybug laughs from inside the green bubble. “Sorry, but it’s not my bedtime yet.”

Sleeper screams and pounds on the bubble with the bracelet clearly on display. Adrien’s much more used to physical touch, but he pours the image into his mind and calls “Cataclysm” with the intent purpose of making sure he won’t be seeing it anymore.

The akuma turns around, becoming paler as Adrien gets in close, but it doesn’t matter. His hand goes through the wrist, but the bracelet still vanishes.

“Hey,” Adrien catches the little girl- who really can’t be older than five- and holds her up as Ladybug does her thing. “You okay?

She shivers and presses closer to him, sniffling into his shoulder. “I- I- I’m sorry…”

“No, don’t be sorry. Everything’s how it should be.” Shifting her into a different hold, trying to get as much of his arms around her as possible, Adrien begins to purr softly.

It’s still a weird feeling, and he closes his eyes to focus on his transformation more. The purrs get louder, and he mentally takes note that it’s easier to change a transformation towards a goal rather than picturing the change that needs to happen. Since, honestly, Adrien doesn’t know how his organs need to shift to purr.

So, taking his sadness and slight panic at how she’s cold, Adrien funnels his focus into heat as best he can. Plagg probably helps him, the grumpy small god has a soft spot for kids, and he smiles as she sighs and relaxes against him.

“You know,” Ladybug whispers, “I can’t sense much that was created from this anyway.”

He grins and winks back at her. Words are hard to do while he’s purring, and her breathing is slowly starting to even out. He isn’t going to do anything that’ll wake her up. Especially since one of them is probably going to have move her somewhere, and it’s best that she’s asleep for that.

Nino walks up to them, a soft smile growing before he turns his head down. “Can’t believe Hawk Moth would do this to a kid.”

“That’s why we’re here,” Ladybug pulls out her yoyo and flips it open. “Her parents are already with the police, we need to take her there.”

Adrien purrs, wondering if he can get her there like this. He couldn’t use his arms, it’d slow him down dramatically if he can’t climb or use his baton, and all the jolts from jumping would likely disturb her.

He nods over at Ladybug, she nods back. “Lucky charm.”

A large ladybug blanket falls down into her hands, and he carefully holds her out- purring louder to compensate- as Ladybug bundles her up. “Alright, I’ll see you soon Carapace.”

She zips off, and although Adrien really should go back too, he turns to Nino. He can’t see his eyes behind the goggles, but he did admit to having problems sleeping and… and even if that means Nino will only be moving father from him, Adrien is going to help him.

“Hey,” Adrien nudges him, “Wanna talk about it?”

Nino frowns at him. “About what?”

“Whatever it is keeping you up.” Adrien shrugs, “I mean, it beats staring at the ceiling.”

“Thanks for the offer, but I’m not just going to dump my personal stuff on a superhero.”

Adrien reminds himself that Nino doesn’t know him, or at least the Chat Noir him. He has no reason to expect Nino to be forthcoming with anything personal. Since, after Queen Bee, Ladybug must have grilled him about the importance of secrecy.

“We. We are superheroes.” Adrien punches his shoulder and plants his baton. “And well, we have each other’s backs. I probably can’t help that much if it can’t be cataclysmed, but I can lend an ear and a paw.”

“A paw?”

Adrien snorts and offers him a hand. “You aren’t exactly fast, no offense.”

Nino deflates and takes it, holding onto the pole with his other. “Yeah, no, that’s true.”

“Hope you don’t have a fear of heights.” Flying up, shooting beyond the Eiffel Tower, Adrien sighs at how Paris shines at night. “After all, isn’t it pretty up here?”

“Yeah… it really is.” The lights twinkle and glow, and even if Paris is getting a negative reputation as the magic city, it looks mystical up here.

Nino sighs and thunks his head against the pole, muttering. “The city of love and I’m hopeless.”

“Well, if you need to feel better, ask Ladybug how stupid I was when we first met. I was clueless.” Adrien nudges him, hoping that his smile isn’t as horrible as he feels. “What direction?”

“That way.” Nino points, and he stiffens up. “Hey-”

The wind takes the question away as they tilt that way and Adrien has to focus on the right moment to snap his baton back to him. It responds faster now that he doesn’t have a chunk out of it- he doesn’t feel it nick any buildings- and Adrien loops an arm around Nino’s waist before doing a few more jumps until they reach a flat roof.

“I don’t wanna ask too many directions.” Adrien looks around, knowing that this is pretty close to Nino’s place. “But hopefully it isn’t too far away?”

“Yeah, no this is fine. But, well, you said you’re clueless about love, right?”

Blinking, Adrien slowly nods. “Yes…? Is that a good thing?”

“Right now? Maybe.” Nino hums slowly. “So, like, what would be your first reaction if your best friend came up to you, talked about your relationship, and then said they had a crush?”

If there was ever a time that Adrien wished that he didn’t know that Carapace is Nino, then it is right now. This is awful. He doesn’t want to be reminded of this.

“I’d congratulate them.” Adrien swallows down the urge to growl. He is going to help Nino know that can rely on Adrien despite his response. “And, assuming they’re my friend, I’ll try to help them out.”

“THANK GOD!” Nino booms, and Adrien flinches at it as his heart crumbles. “You’re just like him!”

Nino pauses, stiffening up almost immediately, and Adrien pushes down all his hurt because this is about Nino. Because Adrien is going to do all that he can to support him, in and out of the suit.

“Um… yay?” Adrien pats his shoulder. “And ease up dude, I’m not straight either.”

Adrien still isn’t sure what he is. Other than a mess that is.

“Okay, thank god, and dude. Dude please! You gotta help me!” Nino’s hands tighten on his shoulders, and even through his suit it feels like he’s getting crushed. “What do I have to do to make sure he knows I’m talking about him without slapping him in the face with it? Because I’m pretty sure I’m just going to see him and just shout it at him or dissolve into stutters and it’ll be so weird and I don’t know what to do.”

Adrien blinks, trying to control the creeping hope in his chest. “I think I can believe that. Hopefully he doesn’t have sensitive ears.”

“Oh, sorry. My bad.” Nino lets go and immediately pushes his hood back, his hands now grasping and pulling on his hair and picking at his goggles. “I’m just going nuts. Like, I finally say something after freaking months, and then he totally takes it the wrong way. And then he has to leave before I get the chance to explain!”

There is a whisper telling him that he’s supposed to be responding.

The rest of him is wondering if his heart just stopped or if Sleeper really did put him to sleep and he’s in the middle of the best dream he’s ever had.

“Um…” Adrien tries to remember how to breathe. And talk. Talking would be good. “So… like… isn’t Valentine’s day coming up? Do… do something then maybe?”

Nino groans, “That was my plan. To say something today so we can do something. I dunno what, but he’s super busy and this was sorta impulsive so maybe he wouldn’t even have time. And, besides, he has a ton of admirers anyway, I… I’ll just get lost among everyone else.”

“Don’t say that!” Adrien snaps out before his mind can catch up with the frantic pounding of his heart. “You are amazing and, you know what, I bet this guy is just wishing that your crush is him.”

Nino snorts, “Yeah, I wish. I don’t even know he’s gay, dude. Like, I’m pretty sure, he’s said a few things, but that wouldn’t be the worse. Him not being attracted to me just isn’t his choice and that’s fine. But if he just isn’t interested… ugh, it probably doesn’t matter. This is gonna ruin everything. Why was I such an idiot and said anything? He’s my best friend and I just ruined everything!”

“I’m… I’m sure that’s not true.” Adrien swallows, needing to help him because all of this is just wrong and also freaking out and half debating if he should just drop his transformation right now. “And if he’s your best friend, then he isn’t just going to leave you because of this. And if that’s the case, then, well, I’ll be your new best friend.”

Adrien almost starts laughing when he hears himself. God, he is an idiot. That’s what he is. An utter idiot.

But then Nino smiles at him, and it’s totally worth being an idiot.  

“Thanks, and my SoundCloud better be your favorite and you’ll have to announce it to everyone then.”

Adrien looks at him for a moment, and a wide grin overtakes his face. “That’s gonna be pretty difficult. My favorite SoundCloud is RedBeats and you’d have to pretty amazing to top him. The dude is a wizard. Have you heard of him?”

“Oh, um… yeah, I, uh, have. Definitely.” Nino stampers, definitely blushing even if he can’t see it well, and Adrien’s grin grows.

“I mean, of course you have.” Adrien turns his head to try and control his smile. “I might be a bit biased, but he’s the best. Like, do you even hear the nonsense that XY puts out? RedBeats is clearly superior, why can’t there be actually talented musicians on the radio?”

“I…” Nino shuffles and does his half-smile thing when he gets compliments and clears his throat. “I guess I’m fine if his is your favorite, ‘cause like, you clearly like it and what kind of best friend would I be if I had you lie all the time? So, you know, you should tell people that’s your favorite.”

Chuckling, Adrien looks as he hears Ladybug zip towards them. “I guess that’s my cue. And hey, I wouldn’t worry about Valentine’s. Just spend the day around this crush, and even I would, at that point, realize who you meant.”

Nino grins at him, “Hey, I think I can pull that off. Thanks dude.”

“Anytime,” Adrien waves goodbye, “And no offense, but I really hope it’ll be a few days before we have to meet like this.”

Since, smiling out at the city, Adrien is definitely going to be seeing Nino before then. And it’s going to be great.

 

“Chloe,” Adrien stares at his new wardrobe at a complete loss, “My Queen, I beg of you, I need assistance.”

“Always happy to help my favorite prince. What is it that concerns you?”

“I really need to look nice tomorrow. But, like, not too nice. Nice enough that there was an effort, but not over the top. Which, well, I had an idea what not over the top was, but…” Adrien looks over where Plagg’s nibbling on some cheese after his long, long bouts of laughter after Adrien showing him possible outfits.

“SABRINA!” Chloe yells, enough that Adrien flinches from the phone. “Come here! Something much more important has come up!”

Chloe ends the call, and seconds later Adrien’s accepting the FaceTime. Sabrina’s head popped over behind Chloe’s.

Chloe smirks and leans forward, “So, firstly, I need to know just who managed to get the attention of my innocent little prince. Make sure she isn’t some nasty gold digger. Or Marinette.”

“No, no, I just…” Adrien looks away and knows that he shouldn’t tell Chloe. He didn’t want to call her because he knew she’d ask. Nino might not be out to her, and it isn’t Adrien’s secret to blurt around to everyone. Especially to someone who reveal she was Queen Bee the moment she transformed.

But he can keep it vague and to himself. “It’s… it’s a guy.”

“Hmm,” Chloe hums, long and thoughtful, and Adrien suddenly panics now- a little too late- because even though he and Chloe share all… most of their secrets, that doesn’t mean that this one will also be acceptable.

Sabrina clears her throat. “That definitely changes things! Are you trying to go low profile or do you want the whole world to know?”

Instantly, Adrien wants the second option. He wants everyone to know that Nino is his, his his his, and that he has the absolute best friend and- his heart jerks and picks up speed- maybe best boyfriend of anyone around. He wants to shower Nino with all the affection he possibly can.

But that’s not practical. And he’d likely only get that for a day. But then he could break Nino’s trust by outing him to everyone.

“Low profile.”

Chloe laughs, high and teasing. “Don’t pain yourself, Adrikins, you’ll definitely have an outfit to get this lucky guy’s eye without painting a rainbow on your face.”

“Hey! I didn’t even know until-” Adrien waves his hand aside. While the revelation is definitely sitting at the back of his head, smoldering with what he knows from the internet, that isn’t priority. He knows he wants this with Nino. He can have his crisis later. It’s always later, but he’s got this important part down. “Whatever. I just need something. Please.”

“Very well,” Chloe tsks, “Let me see.”

Adrien shows his wardrobe to the two girls, and the two of them quietly whisper their opinions to each other. He doesn’t say anything, since it doesn’t sound like they want to hear him. But he’s glad the camera is turned away when they snicker and say some choice words at a shirt that Adrien quite liked actually.

“Alright! We have come to a decision.” Flipping the phone back to him, the two girls smile and nod at each other. “So, you definitely have to wear those black jeans.”

“This pair?” Holding it up, feeling the slight stretch from a fabric that’s not completely denim, Adrien isn’t sure if he likes them.

But when the two experts nod at him, he puts it aside to be sure that he’ll wear it.

“Okay,” Sabrina smiles at him, “Are you going to be walking around at all for tomorrow? We don’t want you getting sweaty.”

Chloe wrinkles her nose. “That would be utterly the worse.”

“I will be. Probably. Hopefully. But it won’t be a lot.”

“Great, then that crème sweater- no, not that one, the one that’s got the vertical seams- will be just perfect.” Chloe smirks at him, “If only it was warmer, then you could wear a dress shirt with quite a few buttons popped.”

Adrien shifts, never going more than two buttons undone unless it’s for a photoshoot, and puts the sweater on the pile. Muttering, “That’s not really low profile.”

“Anyways, Adrikins, the most important piece. Do not take it off unless you already have this guy of yours drooling and wrapped around your finger. Understand that, my prince?”

He bows his head slightly, “Of course, my Queen.”

“Great. That red short trench coat, wear it. Leave it open, but that color is going to look fantastic on you Adrikins.” Chloe smirks at him, “There’s a reason your Father doesn’t let you where red often.”

Blinking- suddenly recalling that, yes, he never wears this vibrant of reds unless he’s modelling it or it’s such a deep red that it’s getting close to black- Adrien pulls it off the rack as well to hang it with the others.

Looking at the pieces, quite simple compared to what Adrien know it could be, Adrien smiles at them. “The two of you are lifesavers.”

Chloe grins at him, “Just be sure not to forget that.”

“Never my Queen.”

“As is expected, my prince.” Waving him by, Chloe looks over at Sabrina. “Now, well, we were in the middle of something, but I look forward to seeing you tomorrow.”

“Oh, of course,” Adrien waves to them. “Bye Chloe, bye Sabrina.”

Sabrina waves back, “Bye Adrien.”

The call ends, and he makes sure to set his alarm so he can do some of his makeup tomorrow because the gray bags under his eyes are not acceptable for tomorrow. Tomorrow has to be perfect. He is going to make tomorrow perfect.

 

“Hello, m’lady!” Adrien lands and bows to her, “What a fine evening this is now!”

Ladybug raises an eyebrow at him, “You seem happy for someone recently stabbed.”

“Eh, it was minor thing and well, I’m just happy.” Grinning, imaging all the things he hopes that he can do with Nino, all the things that they can grow into, Adrien tenses his arms against the vibration running through them.

“Mm hmm,” Ladybug chuckles, “Go on, I know you’re just dying to say something.”

“Oh my god, Ladybug! It is the best thing ever! I thought I’d have to spend tomorrow wallowing around in misery and as the wingman and just totally hopeless but then I was told- well, it really felt more like a smack- that I was the crush and that I’m the one and- and- and! And oh my god! Oh my god it is the best thing ever and I can’t believe it!”

Adrien laughs and stamps his feet, “I already have my outfit picked out and a few plans- totally adaptable in case something comes up or if one of them is too much or anything- and it’s going to be amazing. I can’t wait!”

“I’m glad that your Valentine’s is going to be great. You definitely deserve it. Now,” Ladybug plays with her yoyo, “What about a little race to burn off all that energy so you can sit down and tell me?”

“Oh, you’re on-”

Ladybug practically disappears, and Adrien leaps to stay with her. He doesn’t know where she’s going, but it doesn’t really matter much anyway. Ladybug is fast, and it takes all of Adrien’s focus and energy to simply keep up with her as she flies around the city as if she really had wings.

Especially when he realizes that this isn’t a sprint, but a marathon. Ladybug keeps going for long time, long enough that Adrien can feel his body responding beyond the miraculous, but he can’t pull from the ring. These patrols are to get better as just them and not needing to rely on their powers for everything.

When Ladybug finally stops on the top of some billboard, Adrien lands next to her only a second or two behind on all fours.

“Meow! Now that was something!” Stretching, Adrien takes a seat next to her. “One of these I’m going to catch you. Just you wait.”

Ladybug smiles, but it’s strangely tense as she elbows him. “Oh, come on, I can fly through the city.”

“Ladybugs buzz around, I am the one that can truly run!” Plus, if Adrien figures out how to change his transformation, then maybe he really can get a boost to his speed.

“I guess, but you’re plenty fast, Chat. You don’t have to push yourself.”

Adrien frowns at that, “Uhm, that’s kinda the point, though. We have to make sure we always have the edge on Hawk Moth.”

“I know, I know.” Ladybug sighs, deeply, plays with her yoyo string. “I just wish… Let me take it on, okay? I can get Rena and Carapace too. It’s not, you don’t have to do any more now that we can have a team if necessary.”

Adrien doesn’t want to contradict her. They’ve been so silted the last week after what happened with the Collector, she’s been frazzled and snappish while he was pushing the idea of experimenting. They’ve past that now. He- he wants them to be a team again. Them fighting, trusting and having total confidence in each other as the fight akumas. It’s better that way, it’s fun that way and they still save the day.

Yet…

“I’ll try, of course I’ll try.” He says, needing her to know how he is listening and wants to do good. “I can’t make that promise though.”

It doesn’t matter. He said the wrong thing. She stiffens, head curling down lower towards her yoyo. Eyes darting away when he tries to get a look at her.

He doesn’t know the right thing to say here. If there even is a right thing to say.

“But- I can pawmise that I-”

“Don’t make promises, please.” The look Ladybug gives him isn’t a glare, but there’s an intensity there he can’t read. “Chat, if you keep doing this- if you… you’re going to get yourself…” She looks away, jaw clenching. Yoyo string pulled taunt in her hands. “Doing this is going to end in your own destruction.”

He straightens up, because Plagg has told him no. Plagg told him that he won’t let that happen, that he’ll force the transformation off if anything close to that happens. He’s touched by Ladybug’s concern, but he knows that she just doesn’t understand the scope of it either.

“Plagg says that I’m fine. A little reckless, but nothing I can’t recover from. And if it is, he’ll cut me off.” An idea hits, and he fiddles with his tail. “And, besides, if you think we need to know more then maybe…”

“Absolutely not! For Christ’s sake, Chat, I’ve already said no a thousand times! We aren’t even adults- we know nothing about this! Messing with this stuff has only brought us stress and the city a terrorist. Trying to bring any more will just bring more misery.”

“Of course, sorry, I’ll… I’ll stop with it then.” Adrien nods with his words, the biggest lie he’s ever told her.

He can’t stop. Not now. These miraculouses don’t bring pain or misery. Perhaps Ladybug wishes she wasn’t chosen. Perhaps she sees this as a distraction from her life. He can’t blame her for that. He knows that she must have a different experience. Perhaps becoming Ladybug makes her fear she’ll stifle her civilian self the same way he fears that his civilian responsibilities will hurt him being Chat Noir.

So if that’s how she feels, then he’ll take this and learn and do more with it. Adrien can’t live with the idea that he could be getting better, that they can be more confident that Hawk Moth will never beat them, and isn’t. That he’s letting the chance of Plagg getting taken away, of Ladybug and the freedom, growing while he doesn’t do anything.

He can’t accept that.

“Thank you, Chat.” Ladybug sighs, groans and picks at the edges of her mask. “I just want- I want Chat Noir to stick around. I- you can’t know if messing around with this- there’s just too much risk.”

“Hey, hey… don’t worry. We’ll figure something else then, using our heads and not the miraculouses.” Adrien bumps shoulders with her, smiling through the twist in his gut. “Plus, I have this great partner that can fix everything, so I’ll always be good as new.”

“I can’t fix everything, so just, just make sure to tell me when something happens, okay?” Ladybug squeezes his arm, her lips flickering with a smile that doesn’t quite come to life.

“You’ll be the first. Okay, Plagg will probably know first, but you’ll be second.”

It isn’t quite a lie. Plagg is the only one that knows and will be the only one that knows for a long time. Ladybug will be the next to know, it’s just… it might be a long time until then. But she didn’t ask for that, so he didn’t lie.

His gut squirms more until Adrien pushes it solidly out of his mind.

“Alright, now that we got all that out.” He almost wants to bring up Nino again, he’d feel a lot better, but he doesn’t want to even bring the idea of him into this for the fear of how it could lead to Carapace. “How about another savate lesson? I’m stagnating in class and I think you’ll be a much better match.”

Ladybug huffs and stands up. “What? They don’t become superheroes to give themselves an edge in savate? Wow, talk about lack of commitment.”

“I know, right?” Laughing, they get into position on the billboard. “Good thing I’ve got you as a partner too.”

She smiles at him, and his gut twists violently before they start sparring.

Eventually, she has to leave- her yoyo buzzing with a text- and Adrien stands there. Watching her leave, remembering how she gave a soft smile down at the screen, and he wonders what it would be like. To sigh in relief to shed the suit. To feel a tinge of reluctance before calling out the transformation.

Adrien lifts a hand, “Cataclysm.”

Even without aim, the power flickers and buzzes within his claws. It doesn’t hurt him as it follows him. Adrien doesn’t hold it as much as he constantly pulls it back, keeping it from mindlessly entering the world and destroying anything. Perhaps that’s what bothers Ladybug. That if he uses his power too much it’ll end up breaking him in trying to get out into the world.

Shutting his eyes, he lets out a long exhale and tries to see the power regardless. It doesn’t fall or move like anything else he knows of. It has the weight and strength of a solid. It flows and shift as if it were a liquid. Yet it floats like a gas.

It’s the liquid part that he focuses on. Adrien is the gravity that the power must adhere to, the force that destruction itself must bend to. It’ll only hurt him if he’s improper and that won’t happen if he knows how to use it. He’ll prove to Ladybug that his powers can’t hurt him, that he’s the one in control of it.

Opening his eyes, Adrien watches as the crackle and power slide down his arm and then trails back up towards the ring as he loses grip with it. Further down than he was able to a few days ago. His arm aching slightly as it moves away, but nothing more than a little soreness. With some practice that’ll be gone.

He’d be disappointed if he couldn’t move it. He did it once before on sheer instincts and panic when fighting Anansi, and surely the baton merely acts as an extension of his body. Granted, since it isn’t actually his body, it didn’t hurt. With more practice, this shouldn’t either.

Hopefully if he keeps improving with his abilities he can convince Ladybug that this isn’t the biggest deal. That he won’t get hurt and that learning more about the miraculous is a good idea.

Hopefully he won’t have to lie to her anymore.

Sighing, Adrien jumps and heads home. Not down to his hideout, not there because tomorrow is Valentine’s day and Adrien is going to make it perfect. It’ll be perfect and good and none of this. No being a bad son or a bad friend.

And maybe he’ll figure out why Ladybug so desperately doesn’t want to get any further into the miraculous when it’s only ever given him good things.

 

In the morning, after almost an hour of fussing over how he looks in the mirror, Nathalie raises an eyebrow at his appearance. “You can stay at school for the lunch hour.”

Adrien tries not to burst into smile right then and there. “Thank you.”

“Of course.” Nathalie looks over him and a small smile touches her lips before it fades back into professionalism. “Your schedule will remain the same for the rest of the day, although, I would like to remind you of the importance of today and what the media can do.”

“That’s why I’m dressed like this.” Then he panics briefly, because what if even if Chloe’s idea of low profile is too much? “It’s… I’m not being too showy, am I?”

That almost smile touches Nathalie again. “No, you look great, Adrien.”

“Thank you Nathalie!” Adrien beams at her, instantly relieved, and he forces himself to calmly walk into the limo. He wants to break apart, all of him vibrating all over, but no, stay cool. He has to stay cool.

But, today is- with Nino- and he’s going to-

“Kit,” Plagg grumbles as he curls up on the seat next to him. “What will it take for you to stay still?”

Adrien chuckles softly, the idea ludicrous. He can’t imagine being still right now. For the past week he’s been longing to go back to school, to go back and be with all his friends. And now, after getting slapped with what Nino said and then learning that Nino meant him, Adrien can’t sleep or relax now.

He gets to see Nino again. He gets to sit next to Nino. And then he can-

A smile and heat climb onto face, and Adrien takes a deep breath. Honestly, he has no idea what exactly he wants to do with Nino, which is silly when he wants it so much, but the flashes in his head are somehow similar to what they’ve always done but just that much more powerful anyway.

Except, the smile stretches across his whole face and even aches a little, the kissing would be new.

Resisting the urge shove his face in his hands- he can’t ruin his makeup- Adrien focuses on taking deep breaths. How Nino ever survived being around him if he feels anything like this is the greatest mystery Adrien’s ever come across. It might just be the most impressive feat of discipline that Adrien has ever seen. Adrien wants- the urge to do something and say something snapping and crackling inside him- and can’t imagine holding this back.

“Maybe I can find some catnip and shove it in your mouth,” Plagg mutters.

Adrien takes cool and measured breaths. He can feel his hands starting to sweat, his heart beating that much faster as they get closer and closer to the school, and he can’t start sweating. Chloe manages to maintain an immaculate appearance throughout the entire day. If she says that sweating is the worst, then that’s something he needs to avoid at all costs.

“Okay, okay, be cool.” He whispers it, forcing his thoughts to still to listen to himself, and takes another, desperately needed, deep breath.

His bodyguard grunts when he pulls up to the curb, giving him a thumbs up.

Smiling, and looking in the mirror with relief that his blush is gone, Adrien opens the door. “Thanks, see you later.”

His bodyguard nods, and Adrien finds his breath catching as he steps out onto the sidewalk.

“ADRIKINS!” Chloe plows into his side, curling into his arm until he finds his hand resting lightly on her hip. “This whole last week without you was ridiculous! Utterly ridiculous!”

Sabrina quietly stands on the other side of him, giving him a small grin and wave, before suddenly glaring off to the side. And when Adrien looks, he sees a lot of diverted eyes.

“Chlo,” Adrien clears his throat, “My Queen, apologies, I really need to-”

Chloe leans in, grinning, but her voice is serious. “You said low profile. If I don’t do this, then just who is everyone going to wonder why you’re all dressed up.”

Adrien chuckles and briefly rubs his head across her forehead, squeezing her to his side. “And that is why I’ll always be your loyal subject.”

Her smile softens, and then, in an instant, Chloe scowls over to the side. “Eyes to yourself, you peasant!”

She could be softer about this, but it means a lot that she’s at least taking the time to explain herself and just doing this for him. Maybe she’s gaining some intangible social thing he can’t see, yet that doesn’t stop the swell of pride he feels towards her.

They walk into the courtyard, Chloe muttering about how wretched and awful it is to be surrounded by people like this all the time and that school’s just better with him around, and Adrien half listens as he keeps an eye out for Nino. He’s sure, with Chloe’s outfit coordinated with his, no one’s going to really or assume who it is Adrien really has planned out for today. Father will never know.

He could do without all the whispers and stares, but he didn’t want to come back to school so he can see everyone everyone again. Just everyone that means something to him.

And Nino. He hasn’t seen Nino yet, and the other wonderful thing that Chloe’s doing is providing a distraction so he doesn’t start thinking about how he’s going to be sitting next to him again. Since, well, Adrien was absolutely sure that Nino’s here today. They texted yesterday- not call, definitely not call, Adrien doesn’t trust his voice enough for that- and Nino even made a point to make sure that Adrien’s coming.

“Miss Bustier!” Chloe chimes as they walk through, practically dragging Adrien in. “Can you pretty please let Adrien sit next to me?”

Adrien chuckles, “Chloe, I like my current grade in history.”

“As do I, the seating arrangement has already been mixed up enough. And I’m keeping them the same as before unless Lila’s medical report says she still needs to be upfront.”

Chloe and Adrien smile to each other, everything’s back to the way it was and prefect again.

“Adrien man!” Kim walks up- Max in close tow- and both of them are grinning. “Glad I didn’t bet against you.”

Rolling his eyes- he’ll never understand how the bets in this class work- he smiles at the two of them. “What were my odds, Max?”

“I calculated that you a 1 in 14 chance of coming back.” Max nods. “I’m glad to see that the unlikely unfolded. It was the much more preferable outcome.”

Kim waggles his fingers between them. “So, spill it when, when did you two become an item?”

“Chloe’s just sentimental. It never happened.” He grins and ignores how she puffs up next to him. “Hey Max, I need to ask a favor.”

 “What can I do for you?” Max smiles at him, and Adrien relaxes a bit at that.

 Lifting his left hand, he pushes his sleeves down to reveal the tracking bracelet. “Father wants me to where this to know my location, and I don’t really want him to know everywhere I go.”

Max nods, “If I have your exact schedule, I’ll make a dummy signal. In the meantime, I can have something that just glitches if they try to access it. Is that acceptable?”

Adrien’s face splits into wide grin. “You’re a lifesaver.”

Chloe huffs and inhales, but Adrien catches Nino out of the corner of his eye and darts away.

“NINO!” Crashing into him, his friend makes the best squawking-squeaking noise as Adrien picks him up and tries not to explode from the sheer joy bursting out of his chest. “Dude, I missed you!”

“We saw each other on Friday man,” Nino says, and if he’s trying to tease him, then he utterly fails when his voice softens and his own wide grin takes his face.

“Yeah, but I couldn’t talk to you during the show.” He turns and gives a thumbs up at Mylene, who’s leaning against Ivan’s desk. “Mylene! It was great, by the way, your dad was amazing.”

She smiles back, thanking him and both of them congratulating him on his return, and he doesn’t feel that bad about the small white lie (he still has no idea what that show was about) when they go back to being engrossed with each other.

Adrien tucks his head down, trying to contain his smile somewhat, but that’s hard when he imagines having that with Nino.

“We also called, dude, a lot.”

Adrien chuckles, it’s not really funny, but he just can’t help himself. “Yeah, well, I guess if you want me to go then…”

“I did not say that.” Nino throws an arm around him. “I mean, I need someone to vent to about my music.”

“Music this and music that.” Chloe appears next to him, squinting at Nino, and Adrien stiffens up. “But somehow I don’t get the impression that’s all you think about doing.”

Chloe says that last part with a very specific look at him. And well, once that last part clicks, Adrien’s manners about outing Nino wither and burn as his face heats and he jerks apart from Nino to turn fully to his long time friend.

“Chloe, Chloe, my Queen, I see what you’re doing here.” He presses his hands up in prayer, inhaling. “Please don’t go any further.”

Humming for a long moment, looking over Nino, Chloe finally sighs. “If peasants make you happy, my prince, then go for it.”

Tension uncurls from his chest and he sighs. “I’ll tell you about it later.”

“You should have simply said something earlier.” Chloe smirks at him, “You’re just utterly awful at secrets.”

“I don’t know,” Adrien glances down, knowing that Plagg’s taken an inner pocket to nap. “I have still have a cat or two hidden in my bag.”

Chloe arches an eyebrow at that, and then with a huff she twists around to go sit at her desk.

Nino blinks at her, “I feel like I just missed something.”

“Don’t worry about it,” Taking his own seat, his gut squirms a little at the thought that Nino won’t worry because they won’t get together rather than Adrien simply revealing that he trusts Chloe not to hurt him.

“Well,” Nino rolls his eyes, “That just makes me worried.”

“I say it only because you’ll get a headache trying to make sense of Chloe, I’ve gotten multiple of them in the past, and besides-” Adrien leans in, unwilling to try and contain his smile anymore, and relishes in the slight hitch in Nino’s breath- “I’d much rather ask about your wardrobe change. Is there someone you’re trying to impress?”

Adrien’s eyes skim down his outfit, his smile morphing into a smirk- he solely blames Chloe’s and Plagg’s influence on him- as Nino shifts. Besides, it’s nice to take the time and appreciate the effort and know that Nino was thinking about this too. The denim jacket does look good, and Adrien definitely wouldn’t oppose if Nino wore more black.

“I- uh…”

Leaning in more, Adrien reaches up flick his hat down. “I’m glad you kept the hat though, it’s one my favorite things about you.”

“Well…” Nino trails off, blinking at staring at him. Which, well, fair. Adrien has never touched his hat, never crossed that line, but he feels bold today. He wants and it’s like he can’t contain himself. Everything just latching onto Nino as the rest of him goes giddy and light.

Adrien leans on a hand as he smiles at Nino. “It was a little high though, had to fix it.”

Nino’s eyes widen, and Adrien likes to think his hearing is good enough to hear the confused and panicked thoughts that are clearly going on inside his head.

“Adrien!” Rose’s squeal gets him to flinch, heart staggering back to normal as he looks at her and she and Juleka entering. “It’s so great to see you again!”

“Oh, uh, yeah.” Chuckling, forcing his gaze away from Nino, Adrien scratches his neck. “It’s great to be back. I really missed all of you.”

“Aw! We really missed you too!”

Juleka nods beside her friend, giving him a nod.

“Thanks guys.”

Alix snorts on her way past them. “She’s just saying that so she can convince you to talk about clothes. Welcome back though Adrien.”

Juleka punches her shoulder while they climb up to their seats, Rose winking to him.

“Wow,” He whispers it, a mutter, but no less potent type of warmth overtaking him at how everyone seems to be glad he’s back. He expected it from a few, of course, but he doesn’t even know Rose or Alix or Kim that well.

“Dude,” Nino punches his shoulder, “What’s the face? You surprised that anyone can resist those eyes of yours?”

Heat tingles back in his face, and Adrien refuses to look at Nino until he’s got it under control.

It hits him, again and suddenly, that despite how badly he wants to be sitting here next to Nino again, Adrien has no idea how he’ll survive if this is what most of the day is going to be like. Like some sort of blessed torture that he can’t say no to.

Although, really, when the bell rings with Alya dragging Marinette with her only moments before- both of them wave to him with large smiles though- it’s not like he has much of a choice. Miss Bustier said she isn’t changing the seating chart. So, oh well, he’s just going to have to live with it.

Since, sneaking glances at Nino as the lesson continues about fairy tales, Adrien isn’t going to complain much about living in his own fairy tale.

 

When the last bell, finally, finally rings, Adrien whirls onto Nino. “So, are you doing anything right now?”

Nino startles, but he’s getting faster at calming down in the past few hours. “Um… lunch, are- is there a reason you’re asking?”

“Well…” Adrien grins- he wanted it to be a surprise earlier but is too overjoyed now that Nino is leaning back to him and confident and Adrien loves that - and walks around the desk. Grinning even wider when Max gives him a thumbs up. “I have the lunch hour free.”

“Really?” Nino lights up, a little tense but mostly excited. “Dude, that’s great. I mean, cafeteria food probably isn’t anything like your stuff. But-”

“Oh no,” Adrien throws an arm around Nino, “We’re not going to the cafeteria.”

“We?”

“Yes, we. I don’t know any place around except for the Marinette’s bakery and Father will never let me do this again if I only eat baked goods, so you’re going to pick a place and I’ll pay.”

Nino really tenses up now. “So… you wanna take me out for lunch?”

“Yep!” Urging him on down the stairs, Adrien has to resist tugging on Nino. “Come on, free lunch dude, be a little more excited!”

“I- uh- yeah. This is…” Nino chuckles and relaxes. “You know what? Yeah, I would love it. Thank you.”

Adrien’s beaming before he can even comprehend it, his left hand and arm twitching as he stops himself from wrapping him up in a huge hug. It’s illogical, it’s always been illogical how badly Adrien wants to touch Nino and how amazing it is, and because of that Adrien doesn’t have the words or gestures for how big this is inside of him.

“I feel like I should be thanking you. You’re going to be picking the food, and I have such rich high tastes.”

Nino looks down, hand reaching up to adjust his hat as he blushes. “The one and only time you had my Mom’s food you couldn’t eat it fast enough. And I’m pretty sure that she overcooked the vegetables.”

“I would personally buy your Mom’s cooking. She spoils you.”

“You have a personal chef!”

Adrien shrugs. That chef can control his portions and Adrien is supposed to avoid any foods with too much grease or oil. It was so much delicious food, and that was back when he was only a month or two in being Chat Noir, and he could have never stopped eating if it weren’t for his manners kicking in.

Right now, he sort of hates the guy for how he has brought up concerns about Adrien’s diet and now he’s gotten more creative about trying to get enough to eat.

“Yeah, but like…” Adrien sighs into Nino when he can’t find the words. “It’s different. She made all of that for you. It was just special.”

Nino hums, and a spare hand comes up to grab the one Adrien still has slung over his shoulder. “You know… feel free to sneak out at any time and come over. We’d love to have you.”

Then Nino smiles at him, soft and shy and hopeful and Adrien was planning on saying something much later- he thinks it’s much more common to do it at the end than before from what he’s seen- but he just can’t. He can’t look at Nino when they’re like this and try to contain it.

“Nino, I-”

Adrien frowns and straightens, looking back at the school they’ve been steadily walking away from. He pulls his arm away from Nino, souring at the person now dropping their phone away from him, but that doesn’t explain the sudden uneasiness prickling at his scalp.

“Adrien?”

He shakes it off and shoves his hands into his pockets. It must have just been the camera that got his sixth sense. “I wonder what it was like to famous before everyone could be their own reporter. Or maybe people have always been this nosy.”

“Oh, dude,” Nino sighs, “Wish you could just be you without it being on film.”

Adrien smiles and nudges him with his shoulder. “Right? If I’m ever going to be filmed, I’d rather it be by you.”

“Dude,” Nino sighs again, but there’s a smile tracing it this time. “You’re such a sap.”

“Only for you.”

His heart briefly spasms when the words slip out, but he doesn’t care. Nino should know. And Adrien would be a fool to try to keep it anymore.

Nino stops. Makes several expressions at the ground. Turns to Adrien with a shaky grin.

“Yeah?”

A blush dusts Adrien’s face, he can feel it, but it’s so little compared to everything else.

He smiles and opens his mouth-

His eyes flick up towards the snap, towards the black blur, and Adrien pushes them both forward- lunging forward- and he gasps as something hits his head.

Panting, Adrien opens his eyes. He’s in a stinky, stupid alley. Ugh, and he’s even transformed which is just making everything more pungent and nasty because Plagg just had to be a cat. He bets that Ladybug doesn’t have to deal with smelling the stink of the city.

He scowls when he tries to remember why in his right mind he’d even be in this kind of place, and his memory keeps turning up blank. There’s nothing and nothing in his worthless brain that’s meant to remember stuff. What would he have if he didn’t remember anything? So why can’t his brain do it’s job and give him any of his memories?

The last thing he remembers was being with Nino. And- damnit!- he was having a good time! Then this BS had to come around- which he doesn’t even freaking remember- and now he’s transformed in a stupid alley instead of having a great time as Adrien. Which happens so rarely and he wanted to enjoy that!

Shaking his head, Adrien grumbles and starts taking a few deep breaths. He’ll actually be able to get answers if he can politely talk to people- even if he wants to shout and scream at everyone who thinks being a superhero is his job. It isn’t. He has a life, one that’s getting pretty good, and why should he have to sacrifice anything for people he doesn’t know and people that always watch him and prevent him from having anything good?

Adrien isn’t calming down. He was trained to calm down! Did these stupid mediations just decide not to work anymore? The whole world must just be against him right now since apparently nothing can go right.

A large flapping noise- ugh, birds, how obnoxious, maybe he should just destroy all of them and then he’ll never have to worry about another sneezing fit- and Adrien flexes his claws to see what large feather fiend is dying right now.

A sharp burst of hate- digging into his chest and burning his mind- consumes him at the winged akuma. It did this. He caused this.

“Hawk Moth,” He hisses, “I’m going to destroy you.”

The akuma flies off- a silly red blur chasing after it- and Adrien bounds up to chase after them. He really shouldn’t be helping Ladybug. Because Ladybug would rather not use her miraculous. Would rather not use the literal magic that’s entered her life. She would rather give up all of this. So why should he, who doesn’t even have that great sense of duty like her, even use it?

She’ll probably be thrilled if he gave up his miraculous. Because she doesn’t care about how amazing this all is. It’s all about duty and responsibility and he doesn’t have that.

Scowling, Adrien runs faster and faster to catch up. Well he’s just going to prove to her that he’s a great superhero! He doesn’t even need her! He’ll tear down this blasted stupid akuma without her help. And he’ll even do it better because he isn’t afraid of using his magic.

“Chat Noir!” His supposed partner doesn’t even bother to look at him when he catches up. All that work, and she just takes it for granted! Like she can tell him off about what he wants and he’ll be more than willing to crawl around after her. “I need to get this-” This being a silly little candy- “into his hand.”

“I’ve got a better idea,” He growls and he leaps. “Hey bird brain! Catch!”

The akuma huffs and dodges him- those great big pains from his back easily moving him around in the air- but Adrien is going to ground it.

He points his baton at it, focusing all his hate into extending his weapon in an instant and to make it hurt. Bird brain doesn’t get the chance to dodge and instantly coils over as the end pounds into its stomach. Holding the pole as if to push it back like it’s some toy. Like it isn’t destruction magic made physical. As if his weapon is something unimportant compared to the flash and style of Ladybug’s yoyo or Rena’s flute or Carapace’s shield.

It may just look like a pole. But he knows how to use it.

Shrinking it, pulling him to the akuma before it can get its wits again and escape, Adrien’s on him. The akuma yells at him, flying and jerking about to throw him off, but Adrien digs his claws in and takes the hits. He wields destruction. Does this akuma seriously think that he can’t take a little pain? A little destruction of his own body?

“Watch closely, Hawk Moth,” Adrien hisses, “I’m practicing for you.”

Twisting and using the akuma’s body against it, Adrien ends up on his back and embeds a claw into a wing. He focuses on his powers, at destruction itself, and jerks his hand down.

The akuma screams as the wing tears and flutters down to the ground, purple overtaking it and the whole thing vanishing before it ever even touches the ground.

Adrien grunts as he steers the falling akuma, simply to make sure that it hits the ground first, and jumps off when the akuma lands. He swirls around for some pathetic attack of senseless rage, and instead sees the black butterfly flapping out of some broken pin and someone screaming on the ground.

“Ugh,” Adrien reaches forward to destroy what he can of Hawk Moth’s magic, wishing it was physical so he could really tear into it the way he wants to. “Birds squawk so loudly.”

“Kitty?”

“Why do you call me that?” He half turns at Ladybug, scowling. “Do you think I’m some joke? Call that cat creature kitty, how cute. He looks like a little kid having fun with the magic. Is that what I look like to you?”

“Of course not,” Ladybug raises her hands and takes a step forward, “You’re way too dedicated for that.”

He raises a hand, and with a thought destruction bursts in his hand. Crackling and sizzling as he spreads it to his shoulders. “That’s right. And because of that I can call my powers with a thought. Control it. Because I had to. Because one of us had to step up when Hawk Moth was about to win and it’s never you!”

Ladybug’s jaw clenches, “That’s not fair, Chat Noir, you know that. You know why we do this.”

“Yeah, well, maybe I should get enjoy this!” He raises his hands and thrusts them down, the ground shakes and splinters at the motion even without direct touch. “And hey, look at that! I just learned something new about my powers! When was the last time you did that?”

“Here, I’ll show you!” In one swift move, the yoyo blurs at his chest. He doesn’t move, he can’t, not when moving is on the other side of the denial that Ladybug’s betraying him.

The yoyo hits him, a slam, and she yells. “Restore!”

Adrien gasps, falling to his knees, and the tense boiling hate burning him flows out like cool water. His shoulders hurt, and why would he do such a stupid thing when he knows moving a cataclysm hurts? There was no point to it.

He looks behind him to where Kim is shaking on the ground, staring at him in fear.

And, oh, Kim isn’t the only one. Oh no.

“I…” He swallows, his body swinging back into his control, and he tries to remember why he did any of what he did. But he can’t. He remembers it so vividly, the hate and drive to make everything around him suffer too until they see and feel it too, but that’s no reason. He had nothing except that.

He turns to Ladybug, who’s still standing cautiously against him. Ready to fight him if he were to snap.

Him. Her partner. She’s… she’s standing against him. And he gave her good reason for it.

“I’m sorry, I don’t…” Never before has Adrien want to take off the ring. To give it up if this is what he can do if he loses his head while he wields it. “I… I only want to take Hawk Moth down, and I- I still think the thing with the magic- but not like that. I didn’t want that. I didn’t- I would never- I only wanted…”

His stomach turns as he thinks about it- when he remembers ripping off a wing. How easy it was. He curls his arms around himself, trying to breathe through the fear swelling up and clamoring at him at what damage he could have done. At the people he could have hurt from how careless he was.

“It’s okay,” Ladybug steps up to him and squeezes his shoulder. “You were under the influence of the akuma.”

He lets out a shaky sigh, whispering. Only for her as he curls away from the eyes and cameras. “I think I would have killed him. If Hawk Moth appeared right in front of us, then I would have killed him with barely a thought. It was awful… I never want to feel that way ever again.”

“Do you… do you know why you remember it?” Ladybug squeezes his shoulder again, her kind eyes bent in understanding.

“I took a hit for my friend.” He gasps when his memory comes up blank at what exactly he did to Nino. “I- I have no idea what happened after that. I was just transformed suddenly. I still hated everything and everyone but I was back but not with my friend oh my god. Oh my god what did I do-”

“Hey, let’s heal this whole mess then,” Ladybug holds out a hand and gives a small smile. “And you can get back to that friend.”

He takes the hand, and never before has he felt so desperate in flinging out his senses to everything that got destroyed. They only do this after capturing an akuma because then Ladybug can pinpoint what got affected by the akuma’s magic. Without that sense or knowing exactly what they want fixed, there’s just too much that could have otherwise happened and both of them would pass out after each battle.

But not this time. This time he seeks out the school, seeks out to where he and Nino was, and he finds a crumpled red hat on the sidewalk. The bill of it smashed into the cement.

“Miraculous restoration!”

Adrien bolts the moment they’re done, pushing himself faster. Faster still towards that area. Falling into an alley- “Claws off-” and sprinting towards where that hat would be.

“Kit, kit!” Plagg flies beside him, but he can’t- he just needs to find Nino. “Kit, you gotta stop! You gotta listen!”

Shaking his head, Adrien staggers to a stop at the fully restored hat on the sideway. He grabs it, clutching it to his chest as he snaps his head every which way for Nino. Maybe- maybe he went back to the school?

“Kit, please, listen.” Plagg floats in front of him. “I know you want to get to him, but you have breathe and understand what happened.”

Taking in a staggering breath of air, Adrien can’t even get the words out. Only staring and begging for Plagg to say something.

Plagg sighs. “This was not your fault. You wanted him safe. Remember that.”

The smashed hat doesn’t look like Adrien was a safe person to be around. And Nino would have never done that.

Yet he nods anyway.

“The thing you got hit with turned all your love to hate.” Plagg looks away from him. “So you’re cuddly thing with him turned violent pretty quickly.”

He gasps, “Did I…”

Plagg shakes his head. “Nothing really landed. He fell backwards, just stumbling to dodge, and I took your attention at that point. Just some goading to get you in that alley.”

“Thank you,” Adrien stares down at his hands, and a sharp burning taste fills his throat and tongue before he swallows it back down. “Thank you so much.”

“Of course,” Plagg grabs his chin and points it to the left. “That’s where he ran off to.”

It’s not towards the school. It’s towards the subway. Which- as he numbly does some thinking- will take Nino back towards his apartment.

Numbly, he realizes that Father is going to kill him.

The thought doesn’t even make him hesitate before he’s sprinting back towards a hidden space. Before he’s back over the rooftops as Chat Noir. Before he abandons staying stealthy despite how there’s always a part of him extremely aware of the looks and whispers he’s getting from below him. He doesn’t care.

Only when he gets close towards Nino’s place, slipping into the shadows and going further until he can slip out and get into the apartment building. And maybe someone will make the connection. Maybe someone will realize it’s downright impossible for Adrien to have been where he was and then here so quickly.

Adrien doesn’t care.

He knocks on the apartment door, his shaking hand making the noise erratic and odd. He waits a second or two, and then he knocks again. Because Nino just has to be here. Because Plagg is nodding at him in his peripherals. Because Adrien is not letting today end like this.

Mr. Lahiffe (shit, has he ever met Mr. Lahiffe? He’s always gone during the nights that Adrien comes) opens the door and frowns. “Whadda want?”

“I’m sorry, sir, my name’s Adrien and I’m looking for Nino. Is he here?” Adrien squeezes the hat, and then forcibly relaxes so he doesn’t damage it all over again. “Please, I really need to talk to him.”

Mr. Lahiffe looks down at the hat and then at Adrien- and he is desperately trying to think of something, anything, that will convince him that he needs to see Nino- before he slowly nods and steps aside. “In his room. Don’t wake me.”

“Of course.” Adrien darts in, his muscles’ exhaustion nonexistent, and knocks once he gets to Nino’s door.

“Go away,” Nino groans.

Adrien swallows, “I’m not going anywhere.”

There’s a long bout of silence, but then he hears Nino getting up.

He sends a look over to Plagg, and his friend nods before flying away. Barely even a second passes and Nino opens the door. He’s still wearing everything from earlier, much more rumbled though- Adrien tries not to wince when he knows he’s the reason for that- and his hair is all frazzled and curly.

“I-” Adrien holds out the hat- “I’m so sorry. I… I’ll go if you want me to, but I- I saw this and I- and I-”

He gasps, swallowing against the swell in his throat, and he lowers his head.

“Adrien,” Nino grabs his wrists and swallows, “I- I want to tell you something.”

“Is it…” Taking a deep breath, Adrien forces himself to look up at Nino. “Is it about what I did? Because I swear, I didn’t mean any of it. Whatever it was is the exact opposite of what I meant.”

Nino frowns, “The opposite?”

“Yeah,” Adrien’s head bobbles, holding onto Nino’s confusion as a lifeline. He can explain this. He can fix this. “The akuma. It- it turns…” Adrien lets go of the hat with one hand and grabs Nino’s. “It turned all my love for you into hate.”

His eyes tingle and burn, and Adrien doesn’t deserve to cry after what he caused today, but at least this burn is so much better than the fever that was raging through him earlier that just wanted everyone else to suffer too.

“I’m so sorry.” He squeezes his eyes shut. “I just- I just wanted you to be happy and I wanted- I wanted to be there for it and I want to keep doing it and all of that was just used to hurt you and I’m so, so sorry.”

Nino pulls him forward, the suddenness of it making him stumble, and Nino kicks the door shut behind him. “Dude, dude, Adrien, don’t be sorry.”

“Don’t be sorry!” Adrien pushes the hat into Nino so he can rip his away to hide his face. “This is all my fault!”

“I don’t see how any of this is your fault.”

“Because I was trying to make up for Friday! Because you told you me that you had a crush and I spent the entire night agonizing over who it could be until I figured it out and I felt like such a massive idiot but-” Adrien flings his hands out- “But I felt so happy too and I just wanted to do something on Valentine’s because of totally messing that up and instead just got this all messed up even worse-”

“Hey, dude,” Nino’s shoves him lightly with a small grin on his face, “Did you know what you said to me?”

Adrien squirms and shuffles back, “Nothing good.”

“Actually,” Nino takes a step closer, “You said that every day you don’t see me is a day you hate.”

“No, I couldn’t have.” Adrien shakes his head and scoots back when he thinks of what he said to Ladybug and that was when he had his head about him.

“Sure, you worded it differently. But, if you were saying the opposite of what you meant,” Nino’s grin grows soft as he steps closer- the door stopping Adrien from leaning back any further. “Then every time I touch you, you never want to pull away.”

“That’s… that’s…” Adrien blinks, shocked silent at Nino lacing their fingers together. It’s new, Nino’s never touched him like this before. Strong and soft, Adrien’s skin glowing with the heat from Nino’s.

Maybe getting slightly clammy, actually, but that detail feels so very far right now.

“And you know, you said that you can’t think of someone kinder than me. And that you absolutely love my music.”

Swallowing, looking down as his blush creeps and sizzles over his cheeks, he tries to breathe when Nino’s fingers lightly squeeze his hand. “Well it’s true…”

“Hmm,” Nino leans closer- Adrien’s free hand jerks and spasms until his fingers grab and clutch at Nino’s shoulder- and hums so, so very close. “I actually have a counterargument to that…”

Gasping, the air his lungs stuttering to a stop when Nino leaves a kiss under his eye before he pulls back. Pulling back to grin, and it’s totally unfair. How Adrien is losing his ability to breathe and his face is burning and Nino is just looking at him with that stupidly beautiful smile of his.

And it’s unfair that Nino can do this Adrien and all that he does is smile back at him.

“Umm,” Adrien breathes, “Yeah, that was an awful counterargument. You’re definitely the best- kindest, yeah. Could never convince me otherwise.”

It is really unfair. To Nino that is. Because if coming apart at the seams felt so freeing and welcoming and warm and amazing, then Adrien is going to spend everyday he can to chase this feeling.

“Come on,” Nino chuckles and tugs him forward. “I don’t know about you, but I’m exhausted and I think I want to cuddle my boyfriend.”

“I’ll… I’m, uh…” Adrien clears his throat as it tightens. “Are… do you want that? After…”

“Honestly, the only question here is if you’re okay with me falling asleep on you. Since, well, it could happen.” Nino sits on his couch and tugs, and Adrien is too helpless to him to even give any hesitation.

He grins against Nino’s shoulder. “I can think of a lot worse things. Namely leaving.”

“Hmm,” Nino wraps an arm around him, hugging him even closer. “That’s good, ‘cause I was thinking the same thing.”

Nino’s other hand settles at his hip while he tilts his head on top of Adrien’s. And while tragically one of his arms is smushed and he’s too unwilling to move to free it, Adrien curls the other one over Nino’s waist.

Adrien refuses to let him go now.

“Wish I just said something earlier.”

Shrugging, using it to squirm impossibly closer to all that wonderful heat, Adrien hums. “I wasn’t aware of my feelings until I thought you’d be gone. I have no idea how I would react ‘earlier’.”

“You weren’t aware of it? But like…” A stray hand slowly, confused and slow and absolutely the best thing ever, rubs circles through his clothes.

“Look,” Adrien sighs, “Your friendship meant everything to me, like, you remember that time with the Horrificator? Absolutely terrified I was losing you. I wanted you to have a great film because you were so passionate and it was amazing and then you were all cagey afterwards-”

“That’s because I was scared of losing you and realized that ‘hey, wow, this is a lot of feeling’ and then ‘omg I really like this guy’ and then ‘omg I’m friends with this guy and I don’t want to lose that because he’s totally awesome and cool and play it cool, play it cool’.”

Adrien chuckles despite himself. “If by play it cool, you meant ‘give Adrien anxiety because his very amazingly tactile best friend is now avoiding him’ then you did a great job.”

Nino huffs too, “Yeah, well, the things you do to me.”

“Yeah,” Adrien smiles, “Like what?”

“Like what not?” Nino squeezes him a little bit more into his side and Adrien thinks he might melt into Heaven.

Softly, Nino rambles, slightly incoherently, actually, about little tiny things that Adrien’s done that’s driven him crazy. Adrien listens, as best he can after the emotional whiplash and exhaustion that was today, but he does doze a little. Even when throwing in his own stories of how much he cared for Nino, how much he noticed and thought and how his attention just goes to him.

And later, later when Adrien isn’t this soft and mushy and only half aware of what Nino’s saying. Later, when Adrien thinks through this and what he’ll have to do and feelings will happen from here.

Now, smiling when Nino holds him tight, now is the time to relax and glow in this safe love gooey feeling. He doesn’t want to go to sleep, oh no, even if Adrien knows that soon he won’t be able to keep his eyes despite the thrill and awe hearing how he affects Nino. So now, before all that later stuff and his brain comes back online, Adrien just wants to soak up all the love and care that’s pouring off Nino.

Right now, Adrien simply breathes and feels blanketed from the rest of the world.

Even if he is, literally, the blanket in this case.

Chapter 3: Small Talk, Big Secrets

Notes:

Okay, now that Adrien and Nino aren't pushing through all that, it's time for a nice, fluffy chapter where I don't have to write a hecking long akuma battle that threaten the fragile peace of these poor teenagers

Enjoy!

“So…” Adrien shoves his hands into his pockets, kicking at the sidewalk as he waits for his bodyguard to pick him up from outside of Nino’s apartment. “I, uh, don’t actually know how to be a boyfriend.”

After freaking out about it since waking up (his thoughts in a constant loop of OHMYGOD and AHH and NINO IS MY BOYFRIEND that is amazing but overwhelming but also an overwhelming that’s absolutely amazing and the best thing ever), shoving Plagg and his snickers away when he sort of falls apart every time Nino gives him a soft smile (like what he’s doing right now, he can see it in the corner of his eye and his blush is rapidly returning… not that it went far), but he almost messed up his relationship with Ladybug because of this and he absolutely isn’t going to let that mess up this too.

Nino hums softly and bumps shoulders with him. “Don’t worry about it. It’s just like being best friends with a few added bonuses.”

“But…” Adrien glances at him, then quickly looks away as his chest clenches at that horribly amazing look. “It’s already feels a lot different.”

Because Adrien can totally do the best friend thing. He wants to be there for Nino, he always wants that. He’ll be there for anything. It’s just… this swooping wonderful feeling? The constant urge to smile at even the hint of Nino? What is he supposed to do with that? Adrien could assume it’s like what he’s seen in tv and movies, but, well, those assumptions probably won’t get him very far.

“Just, well, think of it like this.” Nino throws his arm around him and, smiling softly at him, bops his nose. “You’re really cute.”

Adrien’s face immediately lights on fire, his brain melting even as his tongue sputters out. “That’s- that’s not what I asked.”

“Well, beforehand, I didn’t say those things. So now, well, I get to.” And Nino smiles. Smiles so big and wide at that he just gets to say those things is making him happy and Adrien just wants to hug him and wishes that he can show how much Nino means to him.

Then it occurs to him, now that they’re dating, he can just hug him.

Adrien breaks into his own smile and wraps up Nino in his arms, feeling his warmth and laugh seep into him, and bright beautiful fireworks burst across his skin because, yeah, he just gets to do this now with Nino.

Nino laughs and pats his shoulder when they part. “See, you’re a natural.”

“I…” Adrien scratches at his hair, his smile falling a bit when he looks at Plagg resting on his shoulder. “Nino, I- I know how busy I am and everything, and I don’t want to make excuses but I figured I should say this now before… just before.”

Because Adrien’s going to have to ball on him constantly. Whether because of Father or an akuma, it’s inevitable. And there’s never going to be a good time to admit this, or a time when there’s a lull, or anything like that. And he doesn’t want to end this right before it can even starts but he refuses to hurt Nino.

Looking at him, brows furrowed and the smile gone, Adrien takes a deep breath. “I- I swear I’ll be there for you as much as I possibly can. But, outside of school, I don’t think I’ll be able to be with you very much. And I might not be able to get back to you even with texting and calling because I-”

“Dude, I know that.” Nino sighs, but he shoots him a small smile too. “It’s gonna suck, it always sucks. But, as long as you keep trying and I’ll keep trying, then, I think we’re good. We’ve been good this long. I ain’t going anywhere. We’ll get through this.”

His chest almost wants to break- Nino won’t leave him- and Adrien suddenly finds himself tearing up.

Almost thankfully, the limo pulling up provides a distraction. He’s going to get chewed out and has a lot of work to do. It’s been three hours since the akuma, nap, and more soft confessions after waking up. But, giving Nino a hug goodbye and then grinning at him, he doesn’t hold a single regret.

“I’ll see you tomorrow.”

Nino smiles, “Looking forward to it.”

Adrien grins back and gets into the limo, and it lingers, mentally at least, even when Father scolds him. Using the akuma as an excuse is weak, but, well, it’s not like it can get disproven that much anyway.

 

Ladybug doesn’t want him to mess with miraculous. Which he does understand. However, messing with his baton should be safer. It’s not like it has inherent destructive powers, and Adrien wants to stretch what abilities it has right now.

After all, he promised Chloe but it’s difficult to talk to her without a phone. Therefore, if he can manipulate the signature on his baton and make the glamor fade enough for his voice to sound like Adrien…

Plagg said it was possible. Even more so for him than others since he has a mental grasp of this technology. Especially since he’s stretched his abilities more than anyone else.

It takes him an hour or two, but he feels much better waking up before any nightmares kicked up and plus there’s nothing much to do tonight anyway. He messaged if Ladybug does want to patrol tonight since there could be another love warped akuma and she might want to talk about the whole thing that happened today, but she asked that they do it tomorrow. Hopefully that means that she was able to spend the day with her love interest.

But that gives him time to do this, and he takes a deep breath when he calls Chloe. Nathalie recognized him as Adrien when he buzzed her to tell her good night. The computer connected to the baton as his phone. It’ll work.

To make sure, he texts Max his schedule. He gets a response, and since it isn’t Max freaking out about Chat Noir texting him, everything should work.

“My prince, you finally grace me with a call.”

“I’d never leave my Queen waiting.” Smiling, these antics are childish and silly and his smile twists when he remembers what happened with the akuma today.

“Hey, so, how’d it go? I,” Chloe pauses, and Adrien quirks an eyebrow at that. “I know that the akuma made things difficult-”

“Chlo, I- I ended up saying things to him. Bad things. We talked about it and it was good.” Adrien sighs, wistful and happy and yet wishing that the akuma didn’t happen. “What’d… what did Kim do?”

There’s a huff, high and haughty. “That no good buffoon tracked me down tried to give me this pathetic jewel. He- ugh! Just thinking about it makes me mad! Does he really think he can win me over with such a silly ridiculous thing! If I was interested, he’d know it. Like I’d wait for something I want, pah-lease! How dare he have the audacity to approach me- me!- in such a manner. It’s just ridiculous, utterly ridiculous.”

He waits a moment as Chloe lets out another huff, making sure that her rant is over with.

“Unwanted attention is the worst.” He lets out a sigh, “Kim probably should have known better.”

“Thank you!” It explodes out of her. “Everyone was scolding me for that behavior when he was the one who brought this all down on himself! It’s- ugh- it’s so ridiculous I can’t stand it! At least you, my prince, have common sense.”

“It shouldn’t be on us to bend our behavior to fit others.” Adrien’s mouth is running away from him, this isn’t exactly what he wants to say. But, yet, despite knowing how hurt Kim was, he can’t not relate. He knows Chloe was out of line, reacted in the wrong way, but he can’t say he doesn’t get why there was a reaction at all.

Sometimes he wishes they were still kids. When they had no idea they were so different from everyone else. When they thought they got such good treatment from people because they were loved and not because they were paid. When it seemed that everyone had parents that were busy and money was just how adults showed affection.

Before they had to grow up alone. With money a poor substitute.

“Do you ever wish…” Adrien sighs, “Remember when we were, like, five or something and wandered off to, oh, what was that store’s name?”

“It was just in some shopping center, and I wanted to get a friend for you and Mr. Cuddly so I dragged you along.”

“And I saw this stuffed cat, I think it was actually some pillow or something?”

“Yeah, no, it was definitely a pillow.”

Humming, the rest of that day flows through Adrien in the bits and pieces he remembers. They both remember it. When the store owner said they couldn’t just have it and they didn’t understand that and called them rich brats under his breath.

It was the first time he knows of Chloe snapping at someone and calling for her Dad.

It was the first time he lowered his head and stayed silent, ashamed of his name.

“Do you ever wish that never happened?” That day, all the days that would come after. Year after year of people looking down on them. Of putting them up on a pedestal. Of never being on equal footing. Of it always being something. Of cameras and images and reputation until it feels like there’s nothing else.

He hates how Chloe acts at school and in general. He doesn’t like how she hurt Kim’s feelings today. But he can’t say that he’s never wished for that ability. To just not even bother with trying to find equal footing anymore. To claw people away from him if they start bothering him. It’d make things easier. It might not hurt so much to be alone then when he would know why he is.

“I guess…” Chloe sighs, “Then Kim… ugh, just him.”

She doesn’t finish the rest of the thought. She doesn’t need to with the regret there.

“I’m sorry.” Adrien closes his eyes, shutting down the panic in his mind and finally saying what he needs to her. “You were so excited when I got to go to school this year. We could finally hang out, but other than a few moments, we’ve never really done that.”

There’s another telling pause. “It’s fine. Everyone loves you as they ought to, my prince.”

“No, it’s not fine. This isn’t fine!” Adrien blows out a shaky breath, clawing at his hair. “It’s so lonely! I clung to Nino like a lifeline- he was the first person in my life to just treat me like, like I’m just a person. Not the face of Gabriel. I’m 17 years old! It shouldn’t have taken this long!”

“Wow, rude. I’m, like, right here.”

“That’s- I’m sorry. I was so happy that I would get to spend time with you because you do the same, but, well, you can’t do that at school as easily as on the phone. And, Chlo,” Adrien takes a deep breath, “I get it, I really do, and I’m really sorry that we can’t hang out as well because of it.”

“No, no.” Chloe sighs, her voice significantly quieter. “I know. And, for record, I’m really glad you have him. He’s… he’s really good for you. Anyone with eyes can see that. I’ve never seen you so relaxed.”

Adrien doesn’t like how she said that. He can hear that tremor, and he knows she’s thinking about her mother.

“You’re not bad for me. You’re not, I-” Adrien looks down at the magic leather encasing his arms- “I always considered you my hero, did you know that?”

“You did?”

“Yeah. You wouldn’t let anyone give you shit. You were always so strong. No one could touch you, no one could make a dent in your smile. I wished I could be more like you, to have a backbone and be fearless in going for what I wanted.”

“Well, Mother still left even when I was a superhero, and I don’t think Queen Bee is ever coming back.”

“You will always be my Queen. You don’t back down, you don’t wait around, you go for it and don’t let anyone hold you back. But…” Adrien blows a raspberry at the ceiling. “You fight wars that you don’t have to.”

“Adrikins…”

“No one will ever steal me away from you, your friendship is incredibly precious to me. I swear.”

“Of- of course it is. It is me, after all-”

“Sabrina isn’t going to run and tell everyone your secrets if you let your guard down around her.”

“I-”

“And you don’t need your father’s power for people to respect you. If they’re good people, then a firm no should be enough. If they keep trying without respecting your feelings, then yeah, give ‘em hell for it.”

There’s a sniffle on the other side of the phone, “You’re- you’re damn lucky that I removed my makeup earlier.”

“I am a very lucky prince.”

“You- you know-” Chloe sniffs again, “I wish we could have a proper sleepover again. It’s been years. And your hair is softer to braid than Sabrina’s, she needs better conditioner.”

Adrien rolls his eyes, “As you command it, my Queen.”

“Yes, yes I do. Give me a date and all the preparations will be taken care of.”

“I’ll talk to Nathalie in the morning. We’ll make something work.”

“Thank you, Adrikins, it’s…” Chloe sighs, and it’s so much lighter than earlier. “I’m really glad we talked.”

“So am I, I’ll see you tomorrow?”

“Only if I see you too, my prince.”

Smiling, Adrien looks up to the ceiling. “Sleep well, my Queen.”

“Sleep well, Adrikins.”

Hanging up, Adrien sits up and heads to his desk. “Claws off.”

“You know, why can’t you experiment with the baton more. That was so much nicer for me.” Plagg swoops to get the cheese he holds up, his other hand starting up the computer.

“It’s a little difficult to use the baton’s apps to defeat an akuma, not unless there’s a taser function.”

Plagg looks at him, tilts his head. “Well, I don’t see why not. Maybe you can change it back.”

“Back?”

“Yeah, it used to be feel different, but uh…” Plagg frowns, squinting at the cheese. “I don’t remember…”

“Hm, we can mess around with it later. I think we’ll go down some night this week.”

Since, looking down at his homework with a wince, he can’t go now.

Plagg snorts and floats over to the tv, Adrien grabbing the remote to switch it to his current show. “Have fun with that then.”

“Shut up.” Because, great, now with that idea- ‘taser?’ and ‘different weapon?’ written down on a sticky note- it’s going to make finishing up his science homework that much more awful.

 

Adrien was in a relatively good mood.

This morning, having to get to class early so he could talk to Miss Bustier about some of his assignments, he heard Chloe and Kim talking. It wasn’t an apology, it was in all honesty quite brutal. But it was honest. She doesn’t have feelings for him, does not want to be pursued, and if he does so, then she’s going to make another spectacle of him to get him to stop.

Was it a particularly kind thing to do? No, not really. But Chloe being honest and even telling Kim this, he just really wanted to hug her in that moment. It’s not great, but it is progress and maybe next time they can skip straight to this point and have no spectacle at all.

Anyway, going to the teacher’s lounge to find Miss Bustier, he also got the help he needed on his assignments and received a letter from Felix. He rants about a few things, which is always funny because, well, Felix.

He also just got to spend the day with Nino, which still feels so amazingly incredible. So, of course, his day was great because of that. His face actually hurts, with how much he just looks over at Nino and bursts into smiles. Just thinks of Nino and starts smiling. His phone buzzes and he smiles. Just, just so much smiling.

Plus, his schedule was free, so he got to patrol with Ladybug with no conflicts this time. Messing a little bit with his transformation and baton waiting for her. It would be really nice if he could get it to ping the locations of all miraculous users, not just his allies. That would make this easy.

He couldn’t get it, but he could get Tetris.

Ladybug swings in behind him, and Adrien remembers when she could get a jump scare on him. Hmm, it’s been a while since he’s documented how good his hearing and other physical changes has been. He’ll do a few tests on it tonight down in his hideout and compare.

“Get the highscore?”

Humming, Adrien keeps playing. He starts failing immediately though, his attention pulled to that strange… push in Ladybug’s voice. “Did you expect anything less from me, bugaboo?”

“Well, you still haven’t beaten me in Ultimate Mecha-”

“Once we get a rematch-”

“Excuses, excuses.”

Adrien snaps his baton shut and grins up at her. “Well then, pick something we can do. I bet I can hold my own.”

“Even…” Ladybug plays with her weapon and smirks, “If it was a yoyo competition?”

“…I humbly admit I’m in the presence of a yoyo master.”  

Ladybug smiles fully at him and elbows him, “Alright, we do need to patrol. Come on, Chaton, you think you can catch me this time?”

“Oh,” Slipping his baton away, Adrien crouches. “I can certainly hold my own for that.”

Daytime races weren’t nearly the all-out thing they do during the night. They stop with tourists, Adrien stopped following Ladybug when he heard the very panicked ‘I’m late… I’m late… I’m dead…’ mutterings of a man and gave him a lift to where he needed to go. Ladybug apparently got a kid out of tree in the meantime.

It was nice, barely even felt like ten minutes compared to the hour they spent before stopping on a rooftop.

Adrien breathes in and looks out to the city. There’re so few people that he knows out there, there’s hundreds of thousands, and yet he feels such love for the city. It… it makes him happy that he can finally be more for this city than just a pretty face.

And now it’s time to at least try and pay that forward.

“Ladybug?”

She hums in response.

“What happened to Pollen?” Instead of facing her, Adrien turns to one of rooftop flowers and strokes a petal with his claw. How strangely delicate.

“Why so curious?” Her voice is light, but that not normal tension itches and picks at his ears. “She’s safe, they all are.”

“I know, I know that. I guess,” Still avoiding facing her, he smiles down at his ring. “I guess it hit me suddenly that even if I couldn’t be Chat Noir, I’d still want to have Plagg around and I think I’ve finally bribed the little gremlin with enough cheese that he wants me to hang around too.”

Ladybug snorts, “Tikki tells me that Plagg is a menace or a grouch, glad you got him handled.”

That gets him to look at her, head tilted and lips puckered dramatically. But, still, Tikki says that about Plagg? Plagg does talk about the other kwamis, rarely, but never anything bad. Maybe teasing. But it’s clear that he respects all of them.

When Adrien thinks about it, Plagg only ever seemed a little lonely.

Oh well, maybe Tikki is a bit of a drama queen and teasing him. They’ve known each other for forever. Literally. There’s got to be some sibling dynamic thing there that Adrien doesn’t get.

“Still, Trixx and Wayzz gets to come out because we always patrol with everyone on Sundays.” Which objectively makes Sunday mornings the best. “And we call them in for akumas where we need them or could use the extra support. Pollen, just, doesn’t get that.”

“We haven’t needed the powers of subjection, so we have no need for her to find another holder. If we have to, she can, but I’d rather not do that to anyone.”

Adrien shrugs and nods, “I guess we can’t exactly put an ad in the paper. But, I dunno, I just wanted to make sure she wasn’t lonely or anything or thinking she was missing out because I made a mistake.”

“Hey, no, none of that.” Ladybug punches his shoulder, and that gets him to look up and see squinty eyes and a smile with a twitch. “That day was a whole mess and we came out on top anyway. Having a backup miraculous without having to take that hit is a good thing. Don’t stress about it, it’s alright.”

He doesn’t miss the fact that Ladybug didn’t make a comment or reassure him if Pollen’s lonely or not. Ladybug’s caring though, he’s sure that if she doesn’t know, she’ll ask Pollen when she gets back from patrol. Ladybug can give him an answer next time.

Yet, mentally, he apologies to Chloe for not bringing up what he really wanted to. Ladybug’s right that they don’t need that miraculous in a battle yet. Even if Chloe did have it or was confident about having it again, she’d probably just be really frustrated that she hasn’t been called in to fight yet. So, as long as another holder isn’t called, Adrien can keep whittling away at this and see if he can convince Ladybug.

“Hey,” Ladybug nudges him, “I’m free for a bit longer, you wanna photo bomb some people?”

Adrien grins, standing and holds a hand out for her. “I would love it.”

They jump back into the streets, and Adrien will work on this another day. He swears. But today really is perfect, and he doesn’t want to ruin it.

Especially since Ladybug isn’t bringing up what happened with Dark Cupid. That’s a gift he isn’t going to question. Questioning… questioning things like this would only make it worse. Adrien knows that, so hopefully it can all just get swept away.

Chapter 4: Puppettear

Notes:

Oh yeah, it's Puppettear time!
I cannot tell you guys how ABSOLUTELY EXCITED I am for this and the chapters after it!!

Snacks and water bottles and air fresheners and other stuff clatter onto the desk as Adrien shakes his baton, thumping it to make sure to get all of it before turning on the flashlights around the area.

He should put in a disco ball, scatter the light better.

“Claws in,” Adrien holds up some cheese for Plagg before organizing the food away. “Hand me the air fresher?”

Plagg grumbles something through his mouth full of food, but it’s only a second or two until his fingers curl around it.

Adrien puts it up and grins at him. “Hey! You’re getting better at that!”

“Well-” Plagg rolls his eyes, phasing through the chair he tries to nudge. “I can only do it if it was in the baton first or if you’re messing with it. But just you wait, no cheese in the world will be safe once I figure it out.”

Sighing and chuckling, Adrien keeps organizing. “Maybe Ladybug will figure out how to create an endless cheese supply.”

“Then she’d be better than all those stuck ups from earlier.”

Adrien glances over- hoping that maybe Plagg will share more about his previous holders rather than just magical details he’s been begging for- but Plagg says nothing more about them. Maybe Adrien will be like that too one day. Just a simple, throw away comment as Plagg continues to live on forever.

But Adrien thinks that if that’s what his memory will be, then it’ll be a happier one. And that’s enough for Adrien.

“Okay,” Adrien opens up the book- a new one dedicated to magic and the miraculous outside of transformations and, hopefully, destruction specifically- to the list of potential things that Plagg thinks could be used. “So we now have the grounded remains of animals- you think that’ll work?”

Plagg looks down at the box of white chalk in his hands. “That doesn’t look like anything I said. Why don’t you use the rats?”

“Chalk’s made from dead plankton. And no way. I’d like to keep my dinner, thank you very much.”

“Okay, fine, killjoy.” Plagg rolls his eyes. “I don’t know what they did with it though. No kwami was allowed to know.”

Sighing- Adrien kinda really would like to have a strong word with these guys- he starts with the ring. Mimicking the symbol doesn’t do anything as he draws it on the ground. Which is good or all of his papers that he doodled on to make a signature for Chat Noir could be extremely dangerous. However, hopefully by adding some details from the ring- especially the jaw and teeth that seem to in the middle of biting down- something more will happen.

But nothing happens so maybe-

“I think I feel something.”

Gasping and whirling- trying not to yell excitedly as Plagg frowns closely down at the ground- Adrien reminds himself to breathe as Plagg reaches down. He doesn’t disturb the chalk at all, but Plagg also doesn’t go through it.

“I can’t go through it-” Plagg hums as Adrien lunges over to write that down- “There’s no power here, not any of mine at least, but it can also sense me somehow.”

“Okay, cool- awesome.” Adrien kneels down next to it and puts his hand down, focusing. “What if I do this?”

Unfurling the ring’s energy towards the circle, what he would do if he wants Plagg to touch or interact with something, Adrien jerks his hand back with the chalk flashes green and black. The colors lingering even as they step back.

“Kit- Kit, it’s holding it…” Plagg floats down, touching it again while Adrien just stares. “It’s fading, but it could hold it.”

Grabbing the book and his pen to the floor, Adrien draws a massive circle over all of it. Maybe drawing even more ideas from the ring will get them even farther. The black of the ring doesn’t seem to mean anything for this- or maybe getting black chalk would help with this further- and Adrien jots down a quick note about that before continuing with just the circle.

“Okay, Plagg, so what do you feel if I do…”

 

Adrien flinches when his phone starts blaring, quickly writing down his thought before getting up and brushing the chalk off on his pants before going to turn off that dreadful tone.

It continues to blare for a few seconds after he’s grabbed it.

This can’t be his morning alarm. No, no no no. No it can’t be.

His shock only grows as the rest of his body says that yes, he has been down here for hours. His bladder cramps up suddenly. His wrist and fingers ache that no stretching can get rid of. He blinks slowly, eyes dry but not as much as his throat, and his skin claws around on him.

“What’s the hold up, Kit? Turn that blasted thing off and try the next one.”

“After school. Shit, shit shit.” Gulping down an entire water bottle, Adrien just throws it to the side before carefully putting his book back up on the desk. “Claws out!”

The soreness of his body fades, but not entirely which sends another ripple of alarm out, as Adrien shimmies his way out and absolutely books it out of the sewer. It’s easier coming in- Adrien has a tracker- but thankfully his sheer panic and instincts guide him out. He has to get back to his room before anyone notices and he has to shower- maybe just a lot of deodorant will do. A LOT of deodorant.

Nino hopefully won’t notice. Okay, Nino will definitely notice. But hopefully he won’t say anything.

Still, since Adrien doesn’t get the shower in, he likes to think he managed to stay fairly on top of things despite the late start. Or early start. Is there even a start at all if there was no end to yesterday?

Whatever, he got a look at Nathalie about his outfit, but she did say anything so obviously he’s good and he does not want to bother with anything other than getting into the car and taking a nap. Taking a nap rather than paying attention to anymore of those stupid thoughts and questions that made him this late and panicky to begin with.

It takes him a moment or two, his eyes catching on the ring, staring at it until they slip shut.

“Dude-” Startling awake at the finger jabbing at his forehead, Nino smiles at him from the unrolled window- “Finally wishing that you didn’t have to come to school?”

Adrien has something to say back about that, he really does.

Instead, he yawns and shoos Nino back before opening the door. His mouth remembering to grumble a thank you to his bodyguard. Plagg doesn’t even murmur from where he is on his hair.

“Seriously though dude,” Nino throws an arm over his shoulder, and Adrien gratefully leans into the support and warmth. How is Nino so warm? Past Adrien is an idiot for not figuring all this out sooner and how amazing this is and then going for it. “How long did yesterday’s photoshoot last?”

“Forever… didn’t get to… do all… hmm…” His train of thought dissolves as Nino rubs small circles on his arm. Although Adrien can’t really take Nino out (even as a friend is risky since Father has strong opinions on Nino) or hold his hand due to the backlash that will surely follow if a picture leaks, it’s great that they’ve always had a relationship where they can touch like this. He wouldn’t have lasted long otherwise.

“I’ll send you my notes from class today.”

Adrien smiles at him, the relief physical as his very bones lose some tension. “You are the absolute best. Have I told you that yet? No one else even competes. Bestest best ever.”

Nino looks away, “Yeah, well, here I am crossing my fingers that Ladybug doesn’t come to try and sweep you off your feet.”

“You still win, hands down.”

“She’s a superhero.”

Tucking his head in, Adrien means to headbutt him. But he just only nuzzles into his neck as he mutters, “But you’re my hero.”

“Dude,” Nino pushes him off- not before Adrien could feel the sudden heat flushing off him- and turns his head down. “You’re such a sap.”

“Wood you like me to stop? Because that’s too bad, I’m not going to leaf you alone.”

Nino chuckles even as he tries to give Adrien a look. “Oh my gosh, why are you like this?”

“Because he’s my prince charming.” Chloe clicks her tongue on the other side of him, “And no great queen would have a lousy prince charming.”

He nods over to her. “Good morning, my Queen.”

“Chloe.”

Chloe arches an eyebrow, “Lahiffe, I’d be shocked if you knew how to treat a prince right.”

“My Qu-Queen…” Adrien yawns and gestures wildly. “Everything’s fine, you don’t have to worry about anything.”

Chloe huffs, “I worry just the right amount, thank you very much.”

Nino grunts, “Yeah, I believe that.”

“Watch it, Lahiffe.” Chloe glares at him, “Prove me right and I’ll make your life hell.”

Adrien straightens up when Nino’s vibe of dislike- and just general tension- sharpens, and oh, oh he so doesn’t want to deal with this right now. He knows that Chloe simply cares, but not today, not now. Sending Chloe the most massive pleading look he can, because later, please later, he sighs when her lips tighten in that way saying she’s not happy about listening to him.

“Consider yourself lucky that I have better things to do right now, hmph.” Chloe spins on her heel and walks off, and thankfully, Adrien has more time to soothe his friend over about this new development.

“Hey,” Nino nudges him and pulls back, his face still sharp. “Does she…”

Adrien sighs and nods. “Yeah, I didn’t say anything, but she knows me. She… she won’t tell anyone, promise. ”

“How long has she known?”

“Valentines.” Adrien shrugs, longing for that connection again but knowing his mistakes with Chloe are the only reason he doesn’t have it. “With how I dressed and acted… she knew.”

“Really? I mean, I thought it was intense, but no one else said a word.”

Adrien grins and glances around to make sure no one’s in direct earshot. “Well, I only make that kind of effort for someone I really want to impress.”

“Dude-” Nino lightly shoves him away, looking away as they enter the class- “I swear, I had no idea you were like this.”

“I wish I could do more. You deserve it.”

“Oh my gosh,” Nino rolls his eyes, “Come on, dude, Adrien, you can barely sit up straight and you can still say things like that?”

A small sliver of Adrien wants to hate Nino for pointing that out- to how his skin clings to him despite the grim that’s worked itself into him and how any moment of calm threatens to seal his eyes shut- but the rest of him is so, so very tired.

Leaning back, Adrien lets his body slump despite the price he’ll pay for it later. “I bet I could say it asleep. You can’t make me shut up that easily.”

“Good to know I guess.” Nino smiles at him until Adrien’s eyes slip shut. As long as he opens them before… before….

Shadows stretch around him- the same solid-liquid-gas as the power from the ring when Adrien reaches out to break through the barrier it’s formed over him.

Pulling his hand back, it stretches to stay connected. It glops and goops its way up, slithering and squelching over his arm. He can’t pull back, yanking and yanking, but it’s stuck on him. Swallowing up his arm and shoulders until they’re nothing but shadows too.

Long black tongues dig into his chest, the inky blackness grabbing him when he stumbles back from it. It holds him. It traps him as it digs in further.

“No… get off…”

It swallows up that too, slurping away at a red and golden light from his chest, and it gets digging more and more. More and more and more until the light starts to dim and no. No. Adrien can’t let that happen. He can’t. It needs to- no- no it’s doing more and no, no he has to- he has to do something. Stop it

The golden flickers. The red dims. He can’t see anything else.

“Stop!”

 Jolting, thrashing, Adrien claws at his chest. He’ll rip it out. It hurts but he doesn’t care. He’ll tear it out if it’s the last thing he does because he can’t let that stay because it’ll just take more and more until Adrien has nothing left and then he’ll be empty and cold and just a husk and what’s a little pain compared to-

It grabs his hand as more than just pain buzzes on his skin, and Adrien registers his name all around him and stares at the dark hand.

Not shadows. Just a hand.

“Dude?”

Looking up, his sight blurry as the darkness falls away into the light and shape of the classroom. Adrien tries to blink it away and the blur drops down onto his cheek.

Note to self, deep exhaustion doesn’t necessarily mean that the nightmares will stop.

“Sorry,” Adrien wipes it away and glances over at Plagg. “I wasn’t loud, was I?”

Plagg shakes his head, and Adrien sighs in relief. Plagg’s had to wake him up from screaming- he shudders when he remembers that particular monster looming over him- and this can’t be worse than that.

“No, but…” Nino squeezes his shoulder, “That looked really rough. Is there anything I can do?”

Adrien shakes his head. “Nah, but don’t worry about. It doesn’t happen often.”

By Nino’s frown and the hand tightening on his shoulder, he doesn’t like that.

“Really, I’m just happy that you woke me up from it. Thank you.” Adrien squeezes the hand on his shoulder.

Nino opens his mouth, but Miss Bustier starts class and then he doesn’t get a chance to say anything. Just a grunt and a look that Nino will most definitely be bringing this up later.

Adrien sighs and tries to just focus on class, any wandering thoughts will make everything too mushy and his attention will just fall apart. Just focus on this- not if he’s already being a needy boyfriend or high maintenance or something else and somehow already messing this up- and keep on breathing through it.

It takes forever, even if Adrien can’t remember much of anything that’s happened during it. He stretches when he stands- his body relishing in it even if all movement is bad movement right now- and yawns as he grabs his bag.

“It looks someone wants to be a Sleeping Beauty right now,” Alya smirks at him.

Beside her, Marinette’s grin gets bigger as her eyes dart over to him. Oof, he must look pretty bad then.

“I just need the first part.” Adrien forces a grin up, forcing his eyelids up.

Nino snaps and points at Alya, “Hey, your family has those sleepy drinks right?”

“Yeah?”

“You should-”

Adrien elbows Nino. “I don’t have difficulty sleeping. I’m tired because I got caught up in something and didn’t sleep much.”

At all. But they don’t need to know that. There’s a lot that they don’t need to know what Adrien was up to last night. It’s… he wishes he didn’t have to lie. He wants to be close with all of them and that’s so difficult when lying has become second nature. That he has to think about it if he wants to say the truth.

But it’s all for their protection. Adrien can’t let Hawk Moth win, and he can’t follow Ladybug’s position on being cautious with the miraculous. Hawk Moth isn’t going to be. He’s going to abuse it, and if they don’t even understand their powers, then how can they use them in adaptive situations?

How is he going to protect them if he can’t perform?

And if he can’t perform, then Ladybug will call on Carapace more frequently. And because he can’t perform, Adrien can’t even protect Nino who would now be in the fray.

He has to whatever it takes to make sure they’re protected. He won’t let anything hurt them. It doesn’t matter if something happens to him, he’s already loved what he’s gotten so far, as long as Hawk Moth never wins.

“Dude, your good night of sleep is still bad.”

Alya snorts, “Says Mr. Midnight.”

They settle into their seats. A blessing that he can relax but a curse that tries to drag him under completely. Nino gives him a side eye and then lets out a little sigh before turning back to Alya.

“You’ll chat with others on the LadyBlog up until 2.”

“Or-” Adrien musters up the flattest stare he can summon- “Chasing the late night akumas.”

Alya shrugs, “I stand by my choices.”

Adrien and Nino share a look.

Neither of them get the chance to say anything, even if they both sigh with very strong opinions about that, because class starts and then Adrien focuses all his energy on hanging onto every word said just so he doesn’t fall asleep again.

Which, even if it works in keeping him awake but not actually absorbing any of those words, it doesn’t convince Nino he’s fine. Adrien’s been able to fool Nino before about his exhaustion. Yet the entire day Nino gives him looks and frowns as Adrien continues to smile and chat with his peers throughout class. He doesn’t particularly deserve it when this is of his own making. Adrien should have set an alarm for when he needed to go back rather than just relying on leaving once he got tired.  

He even went on a run the night before- he really hopes those tourists got home okay- so he was convinced that he wouldn’t be there for any longer than an hour or two. Drop off the supplies, make some observations about the chalk that probably wouldn’t be anything, and leave.

Still, even if it his fault, he is a little relieved to leave at lunch for a photoshoot. Maybe Nino can enjoy something of today rather than stressing over him. Nino deserves to relax. He’s going on tv tomorrow for the Challenge.

And considering how tense he got when Kim called out his congratulations, Nino needs all the relaxing he can get.

Yet this time, even if he has to drudge through the photoshoot, at least he gets to nap. At least he can half doze through the makeup. It does suck that due to this performance that Father likely won’t let him out, but he’ll be seeing Nino tomorrow at the tv station anyway.

Adrien should have taken better care of himself. He hates it when he gets this tired. This exhausted. It’s wrong of him to hope for an akuma, but right now he thinks that would be the only distraction that could pull him out of this soup that used to be coherent thoughts and feelings.

He takes a deep breath when it’s time for him to model.

He thinks he can smell the faintest whiff of cider as he moves according to the director.

 

“Here,” Nino slides his notes over to him when the last bell of the day rings. Thank God. “Take pictures of it if you need to.”

Looking at, seeing some of the things he didn’t write down, Adrien starts scribbling it all down. “If you could just give me a few minutes… wanna get this down now.”

“No problem,” Nino pulls out his phone, which at least means he won’t be bored as Adrien’s doing this.

Ivan stops by and talks music with Nino for a few moments as Adrien rushes to get everything down. His hand writing sucks, his hands stiff and cramped after the hours of use since the last time he went to sleep, but he doesn’t want to take up anymore of Nino’s time.

“Okay,” Adrien pushes it back over to Nino, “Thank you.”

“Again, not a problem my man.” Nino grins at him, softer than expected. “You know I’m always happy to help, right?”

Adrien can’t hear anyone else in the room and the lab doesn’t have windows, so well there’s absolutely no way he can resist leaning forward to kiss Nino’s cheek. Lingering, tilting his forehead in to knock gently against Nino, Adrien pulls back with a smile.

Then his stupid phone buzzes.

Sighing, Adrien shrugs over at Nino who’s blinking and smiling. “What a buzzkill.”

“Huh? Ugh, yeah,” Nino glares down at the phone as he gets up, “I mean, it’s fine, we’ll text later, yeah?”

“Of course, and I’m not missing tomorrow for the world.” Adrien nudges Nino, “I need to watch you absolutely crush it.”

Nino looks away, as if that could hide his nervous smile. Adrien smiles ahead, feeling smug and joyful all at once. It’s been awfully long and short, them being together together, and Adrien wishes he could have more and more.

“It’s going to be much harder now, and I’m not even an adult and-”

“And you’re going to do great.” Adrien throws an arm around him, squeezing his shoulder. “It’s hard not to love your music, much like the producer, I must say.”

Nino lifts his eyes up and doesn’t quite stamp his smile. “You’re going to kill me one of these days. My face hurts, it actually aches, because of you.”

“I would never and you’ve done the same to me so this is revenge.” Adrien takes back his arm as they approach his ride. “And remember, ice cream works wonders when working yourself up.”

“Says you, you still have an appalling lack of ice cream in your life.”

Huffing, Adrien bumps fist in goodbye (it feels so inadequate now) and waves when he gets in. “See you soon!

“See you, dude!”

He blinks, and his eyes shift over to the manor. The lure of his hideout briefly calls to him rather than getting shut in there, a safe place for him to think, but he doesn’t have anything comfortable down there to nap on either. Maybe he should bring something down there.

Actually, as he ideally thinks as he walks back to his room, maybe he shouldn’t be making it more livable. It was only ever supposed to be a place where he could have the miraculous stuff without worrying about anyone finding it.

Or… he could destroy more of the stone into a hallway and put a bathroom. No, wait, it would be more like an outhouse. As long as he could reach the bin- a bag would be better actually- underneath it, then he can just destroy it. Who needs plumbing when he can just obliterate it?

He’ll still have to get something for the smell though. The few things he has just to deal with the sewer smell isn’t strong enough. Candles don’t seem like a great idea, so he’ll just have to bring down more air fresheners.

Shrugging, he’ll deal with that later. He’d prefer to just sleep.

 

Adrien wakes up, slowly as his dream blurs and tears apart, but then very, very quickly.

Looking down at the streets below him, leaping over rooftops before he can even string a thought together, and he wonders if he’s still sleeping. Yet- though more of his dreams are starting to feel more real- the weight of his baton and flow of the power can’t ever be faked by his subconscious.

He did not go to sleep transformed. He would never do that to Plagg. And he isn’t even trying to stay hidden as he’s jumping over the city. He wouldn’t do that without Ladybug around. He isn’t- he’s not doing any of this.

Trying to move, trying to get his legs and arms to stop, isn’t possible. He tries and tries but he can’t control any of his movements at all. He can’t even try to see anything beyond where he’s staring, everything in the edges in his is just lost to him and he doesn’t get even get the chance to see what time it is or anything.

Which now he is thinking at his limbs to be controlled which isn’t even how they work but there’s nothing. He’s staring at his arms and legs that have always just responded and now they’re not and there’s nothing he can do!

He’s stuck! He’s in his head and he can’t get out and can’t do anything and-

His eyes flick towards the Dupain-Cheng bakery, and it lingers. It lingers and focuses on Marinette’s bedroom. He sees it despite screaming no and wishing he could close his eyes against it. He can’t. He can’t and is fully aware as his legs push and arms extend and there’s nothing he can do to stop himself from bursting in and crashing into her room.

The girl in question squeals, falling off her chair and staring up at him.

“Where are the dolls?” He squeals it out- his own voice foreign and wrong and not his because his body has been stolen- and feels the same panic on Marinette’s face. “I want those dolls!”

“I- what dolls? What’s-”

“Marinette?” Ms. Dupain-Cheng calls, “What was that?”

“GIVE ME THOSE DOLLS OR I’LL TAKE THEM!”

To his horror, he lifts his arm that’s brimming with his powers. He can’t even feel it- which should be entirely impossible- and points his claws at her. This is awful, he can’t stop himself, and he can’t even begin to think of a way out of it. Not without his powers. He can’t destroy this if he doesn’t have access to destruction.

“Manon?” Marinette gasps, hands fluttering up to her throat. “Please, stop this. I can-”

“I’m Puppettear! And I get what I want!”

Adrien screams in his head, screaming and screaming for him to stop, and yet he can do nothing before pouncing on Marinette.

In sheer horror- because he has no idea what’ll happen if his powers touch someone without control- he desperately goes from trying to control his limbs to manipulating the ring. Even though this akuma seems to have power over him, there’s no way that they know this ring better than him.

Adrien’s studied this. He knows how it feels. He’s broken himself with this ring on accident, so surely he can do it on purpose.

His interference confuses the akuma enough to slow himself down for Marinette to dodge, scrambling to get away, and immediately capitalizes that he can influence his transformation even like this. He may not be able to control himself directly, but like hell he’s just going to let this akuma do this to his friend.

“Marinette- oh my god!” Mr. Dupain-Cheng opens up the hatch and stares wide-eyed at him. “Honey, send in an akuma alert!”

“TELL ME WHERE THE DOLLS ARE OR-” The akuma lifts his hand again and charges, but Adrien pushes the transformation off his left arm and- the moment he feels it back under his control- grabs his tail and yanks himself off course.

If he had his eyes, he would have started crying at how he has his arm again. That it’s listening to him and he has control again.

Even with the sheer panic trilling through him, desperate to keep his controlled body away from Marinette, he immediately hates this weird transformation that’s happening. It’s all so... wrong. The direct comparison- of the magic infused into his body to the point of invulnerability and of his normal reality tingling on his left arm- it makes him nauseous. And just being so aware of the magic now- of how wrong and unnatural it is, how different and entangled it is into him, that he doesn’t even feel like him- Adrien really hopes that this isn’t what it feels like normally and it’s the akuma’s influence making it worse than what it is.

The akuma uses his legs to stand, and- now that part of their influence has been shifted- Adrien can almost hear the background thoughts and his intuition working in favor of the akuma. How he needs to shift his balance or how much strength to jump up in this small space.

Which means he can easily interrupt that process by yanking on the transformation to startle himself. To the point where he flops on his face. Hopefully that won’t bruise even in this semi-transformed state.

“HOW DARE YOU! You listen to me!” His words, high pitched and confused and angry, stop the akuma long enough for him to reach up and yank on an ear. “HEY! Stop that! Go away!”

A quip immediately flies into his head and then his thoughts dumb down to silence when the akuma brings his clawed, powered hand- a hand and power that he has no control over- stop it- it needs to not move it can’t move- he can’t move it- no, no no no nononono

Adrien watches, helpless, wanting to cry but can’t even feel that, as his arm goes black and then falls apart into nothing.

Everything all at once starts spinning wildly as the crumbling reaches up to where the suit still is. The magic inside him splits apart- what is clearly the butterfly magic twisting as destruction tears at the connection it needs. Which, Adrien supposes, is his own body. If he doesn’t exist, there’s nothing for the akuma to manipulate.

It doesn’t hurt, but he can’t really… he can’t really feel anything. Or hear anything. Or see anything. Just this greyed haze and, well, he’s really tired for some reason now and… and…

I wish all the pain would just stop.

One day, I’ll get so strong and smart that it’ll all be gone. One day… once I awake up…

 

Adrien honestly didn’t think today could get much worse.

But waking up instantly proves him wrong.

There’s screaming all around him. In his body. In his ears. Everything hurts- his blood boiling and his skin all clammy and the ring tearing at him while holding him together all at the same time- and he might be falling or on a boat because he certainly can’t feel the ground or his balance.

But, once he pieces together that the screaming isn’t his own, he scrambles towards it instantly, trying not to think about how his center of mass is all off kilter and reaches out towards the child- just why Hawk Moth?- and cuts the rest of the magic off. At least, even though everything in him is exhausted and sore and it feels like he tried to summon two kwamis while going through few rounds with Anansi while dealing with a fever, that the akuma is gone and the child is safe.

“Huh?” The child, lip wobbling and slowly hunching in over herself. “Mommy? I want Mommy.”

“Don’t worry-” His voice breaks and rasps, and Adrien sobs a little as he tries to breathe. “She’ll come.”

Adrien makes the mistake of glancing down at his left arm when the child gasps at it. There’s... well his arm certainly isn’t there. It’s interesting, a vague thought cuts through the agony shredding his mind, that because he’s so used to an arm, his suit is trying to go over something not there. Green and gold bursting and flickering into the outline of an arm before fading to black and disappearing and then flickering all over again.

“Chat Noir!” Ladybug instantly steers him off to the side, tears running down her face as her fingers claw into his shoulder and that’s such bright sensation when everything’s hazy and swirly and he really just kinda wants to lay down and scream and cry. “Oh my god- it’s okay- it’s- I can- I can fix this. I can fix this, I swear, I- I can- Just- are you ready for cure?”

It honestly sounds like the most exhausting thing he could do right now.

But, alas, doing this means he can leave sooner and then sleep sooner. It means all this pain will go away.

“Miraculous Restoration.”

He destroyed his own arm, so he knows it really well and it’s always easier to sense the things his powers destroyed, and thankfully there wasn’t much blatant destruction with this one or anything that needs destroying. It was all just stupid manipulation.

Blinking wearily once that’s done, he flexes his left arm and watches as his transformation sweep over it. Huh, learned more about that then. He’ll jolt down a quick note before he goes back to sleep. Definitely didn’t think he would get results about his transformation experiments so soon, but well, he is really glad it happened now rather than not at all.

“Kitty?” Ladybug squeezes his shoulder, sniffing as more tears shine in her blue eyes. “Are… are you alright?

“I’m really tired…” He mutters and uses his new hand to rub at his eyes.

Ladybug opens her mouth for a moment, and then slowly closes it. Squeezes his shoulder until his pulse throbs underneath. “I- yeah, yeah- that’s a good idea. Go back, and- and get away from this. You shouldn’t, after all this, yeah, you’ve done so much so, so please Chat, get some rest.”

Nodding, Adrien tries to smile, smile like he always does when Ladybug gets freaked like this, before waving and leaving the tv room and bounding off towards home. It’s all a blur of movement and trying to be subtle. He can barely think- muted feelings of indifference when he thinks of the homework he wanted to get done after his nap- and he grabs some of his snacks before collapsing on his bed.

“Claws in.” Closing his eyes, Adrien tears into his food. “That was awful.”

Plagg hums his agreement as he curls up on his chest, nibbling on the cheese that Adrien puts next to him.

“We need to figure out some way to stop that that’s…”

Less destructive? The only thing that his powers do is related to destruction. There is no creation involved at all. And once the akuma’s powers hook into him, there’s no way for him to pull away without destroying aspects of himself or pulling the power away. He could, if he knew more, might be able to pull his transformation off completely so at least he wouldn’t be a threat.

But while that’s less destructive to the immediate people around him, it would be terror on his life if he exposes his identity. Not everyone loves superheroes and he can imagine the amount of people that will hate that someone rich also got these powers. His friends will have to deal with that. Family. The school. Everyone he ever cares about will feel this. Just knowing him could ruin their whole lives.

So where exactly does that leave him with? How can he avoid this if he doesn’t even know how to approach the problem at all?”

 “…better.”

               Adrien sighs, like that’s going to get him anywhere.

Plagg grumbles, “Less talking and more sleeping.”

Adrien sighs his agreement, and after dully chewing food for a few minutes, follows exactly what Plagg said.

 

When Adrien wakes up, he thinks that not everything is so awful this time around.

However, with nightmares lingering in his head, of Marinette dissolving into nothing before his eyes and then Nino and Chloe and Ladybug following as they try to reach for him, it’s not exactly a great improvement.

Gently scooting Plagg down onto the bed, Adrien gets up to write a few things down. He won’t be going to his hideout any time soon. Definitely not tonight and he’ll need tomorrow he’ll be busy with Nino at the Challenge. But he can put down things right now.

Maybe Ladybug’s right. The more he knows how to use the ring and his powers, the more dangerous he is once he’s compromised. He could have killed Marinette today. He might have died himself if the akuma didn’t stop the destruction at to where he took off the transformation. If he detransformed into his chest… well, then at least he definitely couldn’t have hurt Marinette.

Maybe he’s putting all the people he loves in jeopardy right now. The more he draws on his powers, there could be ripple effects that he can’t even see. The more he invites magic into his life, maybe some of it is rubbing off on the people around him. Making it easier for Hawk Moth to see them and use them.

Adrien frowns at that thought, because, yeah, there’s been a lot of akumas that deal with people he knows. So many in their class alone when Paris has millions living here. It’s… it’s entirely possible.

And the miraculous of protection went to Nino. Sure, maybe Wayzz would have resonated with Nino anyway and Wayzz went to him because Nino happened to be really close and Adrien needed someone to come immediately. But considering how much time Adrien spends with Nino, maybe he was already dragged into this.

Is just… is just being Chat Noir enough to hurt the people around him?

Then maybe he needs to know more about it. Because if there’s nothing he can do, then he needs to do all that he can to be the best superhero he can be. Knows all that he can so he can protect them if they’re already in danger.

It was because he knew how to mess with his transformation and what the ring feels like that he was able to protect Marinette. But that wasn’t good enough. Maybe he needs a failsafe? Something that can shut down the ring at any moment. Or something that makes it impossible for the butterfly’s magic to get anywhere between him and his connection to the ring.

Adrien stares down at the words for a moment, wondering what Ladybug’s plan for this is. He’ll figure out during tomorrow’s patrol. But no matter what hers is, this is top priority. He won’t ever let Hawk Moth do this again.

His left hand twitches. He would rather not have the hand at all if that means he doesn’t have to worry about how he can hurt others with it. He would do anything to make sure that they stay protected.

Twisting the ring, Adrien wonders what else that this ring has destroyed that couldn’t be fixed.

Wonders what he would still be willing to destroy even knowing that.

Despite how tired he is, it takes him a long time to fall back asleep.

Chapter 5: Simon Says

Adrien, with about three cups of coffee in him, smiles softly at the decaffeinated ball of restless energy that is his boyfriend.

“Nino, breathe.” Adrien leans into him, knocking their shoulders together. “You got this far because you earned it. And you’ll prove that you can go farther.”

Nino lets out a shaky laugh and fiddles with his hat for the tenth time in the last twenty minutes. “You’re, like, required to say that.”

“And were the people who decided for you to go on required to say it too?”

“Huh,” Nino huffs, “Well, NO, I guess. But they’re not required for me to let me keep going.”

“They are. Everyone loves your music.”

“See, another thing you have to say.”

Adrien smiles and shakes his head, wrapping his arm around Nino and squeezing his shoulder. “I’m saying that because everyone can hear the love you put in your music. And I knew that within a week of knowing you.”

Nino looks down, smiling, and Adrien’s face just hurts as his smile tries to grow even bigger.

It’s amazing, honestly, how Adrien can be this happy right now. He had a somewhat awkward and painful phone call with Chloe, where they hung up and Adrien was left wondering if maybe he should be more. If when Chloe said, with that sad sigh, that she was glad he had someone, then maybe Adrien should be trying harder to be someone for her.

He left the house with Father humming and saying it was a shame that Adrien had to leave since he wanted to play piano later. And it is a shame. Father’s been so busy lately and Adrien’s been exhausted trying to keep up with everything. He’s even been trying to squeeze in more naps and sleep for longer, but the lingering fatigue is always there except for when he transforms.

Yet standing here, not doing much of anything except watching Nino contain his nervous energy into small fiddles with his hand or little rocks back and forth on his feet, a very comfortable contentment settles in his chest and mind.

He can very easily spend days just like this.

His smile manages to grow thinking about it, at the gooey warmth slowly spreading through him.

Nino rolls his eyes. “Glad that my panic is making you happy.”

“I’m just already relishing in my told-you-so.” His smile morphs into something more smirkish, snickering as Nino groans.

“Nino Lahiffe.”

The call startles them, and Adrien pulls his arm back with one last squeeze. The person leads them inside, where the host is talking cheerfully to others, and gestures them off to the side. “Wait here until your cue, don’t make any noise once we go live.”

They both send them thumbs up, before Nino’s thumbs go back to twiddling and fussing with themselves. Adrien spares the thought if a turtle ever buzzes with this energy as well. Although, he supposes, Nino does do quite a good job at keeping it contained. His face is a little tense, eyes darting around too much to be perfectly calm, but not anything anyone would be able to notice. It’s only his hands that are the giveaway.

Once the show starts, everyone hustling around and people calling out, Adrien rubs his thumb into at the top of Nino’s shoulder. Glowing when Nino turns to smile at him.

Yeah, this is nice. This is what he wants.

He does wish that he could say something, one last reassurance that Nino is going to crush this when he gets called up. But he only smiles as Nino tightens his cap and sets up to board, grinning and snapping finger guns to the camera.

Adrien chuckles softly to himself. What a dork. How are they not going to love him?

And when Nino begins to play, his fingers gracefully fly over the board that almost looks like a dance itself. The tune starts almost slow, unassuming, with a catchy hum before picking up. It feels like a great sweep up- Adrien’s foot and shoulder caught up in it and bobbing along- and then Nino starts adding in more-

“And that’s a win!”

Blinking, because wow that was only like, less than a minute, Adrien’s face splits into a huge grin at the baffled shock Nino gives to the host. His music coasts for a moment before the audio people shut it off, and then it’s just the sound of the mayor’s flustered defense.

As if Nino didn’t get him to dance almost immediately.

“Oh wow,” The next contestant whispers, “He is very good.”

“He really is.” Adrien smiles up at the man with the glittering suit, quieting into just waving a greeting when one of the stage managers give them a sharp look.

The man raises his hand back, flinching back when his bodyguard takes an aggressive step forward. Grunting and relaxing only when Adrien grabs his arm. Which, honestly, it’s been a while since he’s been so overprotective of Adrien. Adrien hasn’t done anything stupid lately to warrant that, right?

Nino smiles once he’s told to come back next week, giving a two fingered wave before walking off screen. And then immediately Adrien rushes him up in a hug, squeezing his joy to Nino since they still have to be quiet. Nino chuckles a bit, soft puffs of air, and hugs back just as tight.

“You killed it!” He whisper-shouts, pulling back to beam at Nino.

Then he hears Father’s voice, and he blurs back from Nino so fast that his next breath comes in a small wheeze rather than a proper breath.

They both turn towards the large screen, where Father is the challenge for the next contestant, and Adrien blinks in a mute shock at seeing Father here. For a tv competition. A very specific tv competition that he already expressed disapproval of. And that’s without knowing that it’s Nino Adrien came to support.

Then Father mocks the game, shuts down the contestant, and leaves.

Wincing on Father’s behalf, since the next contestant looks crushed, Adrien does have to admit that behavior is much more on par than Father actively participating.

“Hey,” Nino gives the contestant a sympathetic smile when he walks away. “There was no winning with that guy.”

Adrien opens his mouth to agree but shuts it at the glare the contestant gives them before walking away.

Sighing, Adrien watches the doors swing close. “Probably doesn’t help that I’m his son.”

Nino throws his arm around him again. “You can’t do anything ‘bout it.”

“Yeah, but-” Adrien pauses when Plagg suddenly flies out of his hair, eyes sharp. “But I guess…”

The doors rattle open, and a man- akuma- comes in with a suit of swirling purples and greens. “Simon Says that this show stops!”

Adrien’s bodyguard steps in front of him before Adrien can even begin to think how Hawk Moth managed to capitalize that so fast, yet the flourish of a card- glimmering with magic- shuts down all his thoughts. And when it hits the camera- the lights dimming instantly- it’s obvious that this is another manipulative akuma.

Well, at least it can’t control him instantly.

“And that you’re as crazy as a monkey!”

Alarms start blaring from people’s phones as another card slices the air to hit the host. Who starts jumping and hooting and hollering.

“Come on!” Nino grabs his arm as his bodyguard rushes the akuma, dragging him away. “We gotta go!”

“Simon Says you’re a gorillia!”

Adrien doesn’t get to see what that does to his bodyguard, rushing out along with Nino and sharing a look with Plagg. The kwami nods- even if some part of Adrien wished that Plagg didn’t support sharing his identity with Nino because what if that only exposes him to even more danger that Adrien can’t control or Nino ends up worrying too much or Ladybug doesn’t trust him anymore- and that means that Adrien needs to find them a safe place to transform.

“Simon Says the hallway doesn’t continue! Simon says stop!”

Adrien slams his side into Nino- their momentum crashing into his ribs as they come to a stop on the ground but that’s better than crashing into the newly formed wall- and he looks at the akuma.

And sees a card blurring towards them.

Nino pushes him out of the way, the card just missing him and hitting the wall, but Adrien instantly freezes anyway.

“Shit!” Nino curses and scrambles up towards the door. Stairs. Good, he can get away then.

The akuma laughs manically and runs after Nino, giving Adrien a wide smile. “Don’t you worry, I’ll come back once I’ve got your friend too. After all, I have a magic trick for you to perform for your father.”

Adrien’s heart almost explodes, and he absolutely blurs into an empty room once the akuma’s gone. Pushing himself into the shadows, yelling for his transformation, rushing back out even if anyone looking at the security feed will be able to know who Chat Noir is now. It doesn’t matter. The akuma is going after Nino.

Halting at the stairs, Adrien pushes his senses out to find Nino. His ears flicker, eyes squeezed shut to help with the overwhelming information bombarding his brain. All of it gets cut. If it isn’t Nino, if it isn’t the akuma he doesn’t care. Everyone panicking and rushing towards the exit isn’t the priority right now.

Using his baton, Adrien starts bounding up the floors. They were actually really close to the roof, and that’s exactly where the akuma would have driven Nino. There’s no escape. There’s nothing he can do. And then from the roof he can hit people from down below. It’s smart.

Adrien should have realized that immediately rather than wasting seconds trying to think about it.

Flinging the door open- it breaks off the hinges, clattering off to the side- Adrien throws his baton at the akuma. Hitting the hand about to throw at Nino (who’s too close to the edge- too close too close too close!). “Mind if I crash the party here? I’ve always loved card games.”

“Simon Says you’re useless!”

Five cards go up in his hands, and Adrien jumps and twirls to dodge them all. He lands closer to the akuma each time, bringing his power up to destroy the entire deck of cards if necessary. He’ll deal with this. Nino doesn’t have his miraculous. This is the only way to protect him.

In one fluid motion- he must have done this a thousand times by now- Adrien scoops up his baton, pivots, and extends it at the akuma.

And Adrien stands there for a moment, his arms weirdly engaged more to hold the heavy baton up. The baton refusing to lengthen.

“Hey, you break it you buy it. I expect the funds sometime tonight.” Scrambling, loosing ground as more of those cards come at him, Adrien tries to think of another way to get close before the akuma tries to manipulate the environment or tries to experiment with his powers.

Is it possible for him to tell the door to counteract his powers and it works? Who knows, Adrien doesn’t want to find out.

The akuma brandishes six more cards- is his deck endless or something?- three in each hand. “Simon Says break your arm!”

It isn’t really possible to think in that moment. Even the background thoughts- ones thinking about how soon it’ll take Ladybug to get here, ones watching about how tired he is and how much longer he can last, ones keeping track of time for him, ones wondering if he can use the environment to his advantage or if that’s too risky- everything shuts down into a single-minded need to stop this when one hand doesn’t aim at him.

His arms and legs move- his senses and limbs coordinating with each other on how to dodge the three cards thrown at him without looping through his mind at all- while his mind is much more occupied about how Nino is too close, too close too close, and he can’t dodge as well and he’s going to- no, no no no nononono-

Adrien expected it, didn’t have time to really think about it though when his entire being is entirely occupied with pushing forward, forward, faster, faster. He doesn’t have thoughts or anything as he watches Nino stumble and fall off the roof. It’s just pure need and energy.

It takes Adrien two seconds to reach the ledge.

And within that eternity he realizes what’ll happen if Nino hits the bottom. There’s no conscious thought. Conscious thought is too basic for a feeling like this. It is an immense, all-consuming void that teases his being. What’ll be gone. A gaping hole in the world that Ladybug can’t fix. What this world won’t have anymore. How cold and lifeless school will be. How plain the world will be.

Destruction. Destruction of Nino.

It’s thoughtless and cruel, the horror and panic thrumming on his skin and pulse because he knows without even thinking because it is an objective fact that he cannot take it if Nino hits the ground. He can’t- if Nino, then that means- he has to save him!

The stone crumbles under the force of him pouncing down, hands extended as far as possible to grab, and he sees that Nino is already over halfway down to the ground.

It’ll only be a second later until the Nino reaches the ground. Adrien knows in his bones he isn’t going fast enough to reach him before. The ground is just too close. The building wasn’t tall enough. He won’t reach.

Adrien doesn’t have the time to think.

Nor does he feel the knowledge of what’s happening.

All he knows- in a spilt second as the ground looms ever larger- is that he is destruction. He can make the ground go away.

He is destruction! He gets to say what goes and what stays and he isn’t letting anything take Nino!

“CATACLYSM!”

That desperate anger and panic burst out of the ring, which burns and burns but it doesn’t matter in the slightest, and Adrien can feel it outside of himself. Can feel those emotions slicing him up in the inside but bursting out of his hand as a wave of darkness.

The void teasing at him yawns open, widening. Hollowing him out. It doesn’t matter.

The black wave smashes against the ground, all of it disappearing before Nino gets to it. And he pushes it farther and farther down, however far as he needs to, because nothing is hitting Nino (and he can feel Nino in this void he has made, feel everything so tenuously working in balance to keep him alive, how fragile, how little destruction it’d take for his body to fail). Nothing hurts him. Not today. Not ever. Not when he has the power to destroy it.

His left hand- full of fingers (how strange) tingling with numbed, hot pricks- curls around Nino’s shoulder. The rest of his body curls underneath him as he draws the wave back into his right hand. Doesn’t work entirely, everything below his elbow shrouded in a thick cloud of shadows and distantly numb- but he can embed the long shadowy claws of his right hand into the wall to slow them down.

For a second, the second where they finally slow down to a stop so far down in this hole that the sunlight here is a little grey, Adrien breathes. Gasps. Wheezes.

Honestly, he doesn’t really care what his lungs are doing because he can feel Nino’s pant against him. Fast and strong with his heart trilling within them.

A very alive heart.

The drumming of Nino’s heart is absolutely the best beat he will ever make. Adrien kinda wants to cry, listening to it.

Adrien takes another second, trying to focus on the blob of feeling and awareness in the area of his right hand. There’s still… it’s still a part of him. He can feel that much. But… it’s, all less defined there. He doesn’t feel the stone surrounding his fingers. Yet he does feel how easy it would be to destroy. There’s no temperature or anything, only the sensation that what’s in his hands feels could crumble with a thought.

He can even feel how easy it would be to destroy Nino. How easy it would be to ruin the music, how delicate the composition is.

“Are you-” Adrien swallows- “you okay?”

“Could be better, could be much, much worse. So,” A hysterical laugh huffs out from the lungs hitching and quivering in his grasp. “So, yeah, pretty good. All things considered. Will never do a magic trick in my life, I can tell you that much.” 

Adrien huffs. It’s not particularly funny, but it’s so Nino. It’s Nino’s nervous babbling when he gets all tense and his brain shuts down. And, if he was just a moment later or the building was a few stories shorter or…

Focusing, his hand is strange and wrong and powerful and it needs to get him out of this hole because his left one isn’t letting go of Nino, Adrien hoists them up and out of danger. Not that Nino’s ever safe. Not when there’s akumas constantly around. Not when he could die because Hawk Moth clearly doesn’t care.

Maybe, it’s possible that he was right. Maybe he’s leaking magic wherever he goes and that makes it easier for those damned butterflies to come around. Most of the class has fallen prey to Hawk Moth. Their relatives and people they’re close too. It’s… it can’t be a coincidence when Paris is so big.

Maybe he’s also being careless. To risk all his friends so he can be Chat Noir. To risk his superhero identity and Paris with trying to protect people he favors over others. So many people could have gotten hurt if Adrien went to save Nino and Simon Says ended up giving up on him to go hurt others.

Jumping out of the hole, Adrien gasps when he sees the cards heading at him. He immediately pushes Nino behind him with his left to block him from the akuma.

And that akuma. That stupid, awful akuma that’s just grinning at him behind the flying cards. Happy to catch him off guard. Happy about this! This!

Nino almost died! And he thinks that’s something to smile about!

How DARE he!

Flinging his right hand out, he watches it explode into a formless wall to shield them from the cards. The cards have magic to them, a fluttering sense of power only kept in the air with the strong emotion blowing it along, and he destroys them with relish.

“What is this?” The akuma screams, and god, Adrien just hates that voice. He wants it gone. “Simon Says attack Chat Noir!”

 The akuma branishes more cards. Evil, nasty cards that shouldn’t exist- that need to go away. All they do is hurt and Nino almost died and absolutely no good can come of them.

“No!” He screams, god it hurts, it hurts and hurts, his hand just one bright ball of pain. Pain that shouldn’t be here. That shouldn’t exist. He wants all this hurt to go away! “I say Simon Says vanishes!”

Because Simon Says almost killed Nino. Because he tried to get Nino to break his own arm. There’s nothing good or right about this. And he is going to make this akuma go. Away. Forever.

His entire forearm just becomes one extending spear of darkness at the thought. Barreling towards the akuma. Encasing them immediately.

He is destruction.

And Simon Says will never be ever again.

“This is a warning Hawk Moth.” He hisses it, his voice shakes but he pushes through, forcing his powers to carry the message as he annihilates the butterfly’s powers. “If you’re going to take more drastic measures, then so am I.”

Adrien destroys the object. The magic. All of it. Immediately and thoroughly tearing it up and leaving nothing behind. Not a single scrap. Not a butterfly. Nothing.

Retracting his hand- is it even his hand anymore?- Adrien tries not to focus how it feels like someone just took a hammer to the back of his hand, wrist, arm. God, everything below his shoulder hurts, pulsing bright and awful, but especially below his elbow. That’s just- even with the adrenaline pumping through his system it’s hard to ignore.

Although, it does take a bit of a backseat when Adrien forces it back into hand and arm shape and it, just, doesn’t become his hand and arm.

That’s… probably not good.

God, now that it’s all over, he really feels like throwing up.

“Hey, dude-” Nino clears his throat, “Are you okay?”

Turning towards him, and right, this is a broadcasting tower. Cameras are already trained on him from everywhere. Reporters already rushing towards him. He’ll have to watch it later, hopes that he looks as strong that he was projecting so that Hawk Moth is at least intimated rather than seeing how- how scared he is.

Because, god, even though Adrien knows he can’t show it, that needs to stop these tears from forming, he can’t believe how close he was to lose Nino. That a few seconds too late, he wouldn’t ever be looking at those eyes again or seeing him stand up or seeing him nervously reach up to mess with a hat that must have blown away because that what happens after falling from a building.

“I should be asking you that. Come on,” Adrien extends his good hand, selfishly praying that Nino takes it. “I’ll give you a lift back and out of this mess.”

Nino’s face kinda flinches at that, eyes flickering down to the hole. “Uh… shouldn’t you wait for Ladybug?”

It’s a good point.

It’s a really good point.

But… but, he- can’t he just escape from all of this? He stopped the akuma himself. No one got hurt. He doesn’t want to deal with the press. He doesn’t want to have to put on a show for them and brandish his arm like it’s a strength rather than it being the void seeping inside of him and the massive pain that’s starting to whittle on his sanity- oh god, oh god he doesn’t have his arm what will happen if he detransfroms- now that the danger is fading from his system.

It hurts. It’s like there’s a too tight headband- that’s on fire- squeezing into his brain. His stomach screaming and thrashing in a tub of acid. His chest stuffed with rocks and he can’t breathe and his arm-

He just can’t take it.

And he doesn’t want this to be for nothing.

“Ladybug can clean up the fight by herself when it’s small.” Adrien smiles, feels his lips tremble. “She just has a hole to fill. So, please? I just want to know that you got home safe after today. You should be with your fam- your family.”

Damn that stutter. Damn that. Damn that and his stupid brain for thinking of Noel because he can hardly hold it together right now and he just needs to get Nino home. Everything- everything- can come after.

“Okay,” Nino forces out a breath with the nod, “Alright, thanks.”

The moment he has that hand, a warm hand with the fingers throbbing with his heartbeat, Adrien pulls and twists and bends until Nino is pressed against his back and he’s jumping off into the city. He doesn’t have the baton, which makes this all so much slower, but at least it’s smoother this way too. And this way it’s more running and jumping, better to use his legs with him being down an arm.

He stumbles a bit when his attention gets snagged out it, at how it tears through everything in a bright agony begging to be healed. His heart- his heart doesn’t feel quite either. But, just a few more jumps and then… then he’ll deal with it after Nino…

There’s darkness in his sight. A heavy graze eating at his heart. An impossible crushing sensation from just feeling nothingness fluttering through him.

Tripping, the only thing Adrien does next is collapse onto the roof. His body failing him in a way that just doesn’t really happen when he’s in the suit. At least he doesn’t feel Nino’s weight on him. At least he got off.

“Hey, hey, hey, man, hey.” Nino falls to his knees in front of him, hands fluttering. “Oh, shit, man, dude, that looks bad. I can- I can get home if you need to go. Just, just go. I’ll be fine. But-”

“No! You weren’t! You aren’t!” It blurts from him, a panicked burst from his chest, and Adrien clutches onto Nino’s arms. Only his left, he refuses to hurt Nino with his right. “You nearly died!”

“I didn’t, you were there-”

“You were- that was because I-” Adrien sobs, which is stupid. He didn’t nearly die. He isn’t the one suffering because of his decisions. Adrien wants to be Chat Noir; he chooses this. Nino didn’t choose to be in this danger. He doesn’t even know it.

Gasping, a flare of excruciating pure pain takes over everything. He senses his movement, but left or right, up or down, none of it matters. He can’t tell with all his nerves lit on fire. His skin getting peeled off, blood boiling, it all must be happening to him because otherwise what else could be happening?

Screaming, Adrien pleads with Plagg and holds onto his powers eat at his insides. But he can’t detransform. Just Adrien can’t do anything right now. Just Adrien can’t get Nino home safe. Just Adrien can’t hold himself together. Just Adrien can’t exclude the confidence needed so that Paris isn’t in complete fear of Hawk Moth.

Chat Noir can. As Chat Noir, he can give Nino confidence. Even if he’s completely breaking down and Nino doesn’t know that he knows he’s Caparace and doesn’t know that he’s Adrien because ‘Just Adrien’ can’t tell him the truth. Just Adrien is a selfish liar hoarding every good thing he can despite knowing the harm it can do to others. Chat Noir is a hero. He needs to be a hero right now.

With a sharp glare down at his hand, Adrien stops trying to perfectly envision his hand. He focuses on the sensation of grabbing things, of reach out to hold or to make or gesture, of all the actions that a hand can do that a formless cloud of destruction can’t.

And slowly, the cloud recedes and his clawed hand- longer and sharper than normal with purple accents glowing and oozing- emerges. The ring itself even is sharper, not so round, the green shine of it cutting out.

“I was too slow.” Adrien tightens his fists against the memory of Nino falling, shoving it out of his head. “But let me assure you, that if Hawk Moth thinks he can do commit such a heinous act, then he is sorely mistaken. I will not let rest with the likes of him holding a miraculous.”

A miraculous.

A burst of desperate hope surges with the idea. A miraculous. If Nino had his miraculous today… If Simon Says was trapped… If Nino still ended up falling…

It would all be different. Nothing about today would even come close to happening the same way.

Adrien looks back to him, grinning as he holds back tears of relief. “Don’t worry, I’ll talk to Ladybug. You and all of Paris will be protected.” Extending his hand, left still because the claws on his right look like a simple graze will slice Nino’s hand up, he bows slightly. “Now, I apologize, in my haste I didn’t even ask to where we’re going.”

Nino stares at him for a long time. Or perhaps it only feels long to him. Adrien can hear his heartbeat when he focuses on it, the lub-dub lub-dub lub-dub rocking inside his chest. He can hear the slight grind of teeth as Nino thinks.

And still what a beautiful song. Adrien never wants it to end.

Refocusing, he struggles to figure out what exactly Nino might be thinking. Nino has experiences both as Carapace and as Nino with Chat Noir, and both of them have to interact with each other differently depending what identity is assumed. And Adrien can’t claim that he’s acted ordinary as well, not with how he used his powers to respond to the situation.

If Nino thinks of why that happened, wondering what it means and if it could happen to all the miraculous or only the ring of destruction, then he could doubt if Adrien can get him back home.

If Nino worries about why this happened, if the miraculous is having negative impacts like how Ladybug thinks, then he could tell Alya and then there’ll be posts about it which would give cause to Carapace to inquire about his wellbeing.

Finally, Nino mutters where he lives and takes the hand.

And this time, now that Adrien can think and control his powers better, he will make it seem that they’re floating through the air. Nothing at all the sensation that Nino just experienced.

“Just say the word if you’re uncomfortable,” Cradling Nino in his arms, a much stronger grip this way, Adrien breathes. Inhales speed and agility from the ring and resistance, doing his best to exhale that over Nino. “It won’t be long.”

He can’t stay hidden like this, anyone looking up able to see him and Nino, but he does his best to avoid the streets. Besides, with the speed they’re travelling, it’ll be difficult for anyone to get a picture. This shouldn’t be photographed either. Nino almost died, that doesn’t make him a celebrity. That doesn’t make him the new spectacle for the public to gawk at. It just means Nino needs to rest and recover without all that.

“We’re here,” Gently setting him down, keeping a hand on him until he’s sure that Nino’s standing firm, Adrien takes a step back. “Please, take the rest of the day to spend with your family. It’s… it’s not good to be alone after a day like today.”

Nino blinks, shakes his head bit, and- like a punch to the chest- smiles that soft, precious smile of his. “Of course dude, you do the same. And geez, no wonder you showed up so fast, that didn’t even feel like a minute. Thanks.”

“One of many talents,” With a flourished bow, Adrien leaves before he gets choked up again that Nino’s alright.

He bounds back into the city, so many people he needs to talk to and get in order, and he can’t help but grin even if there are tears streaming out of his eyes.

Nino’s alive.

God, he’ll do anything to make sure today can’t happen again.

At least he didn’t get choked up in front of Nino, and he can stay hidden going back to the tower. The last thing he needs is to hear about how emotional distraught Chat Noir was from Alya and the school when he gets back on Monday.

Adrien detransforms by the tower, hidden in the crowd that’s swarming towards Ladybug crouched down by the hole he made. They don’t approach yet, hovering around her, not until she flashes with her own power, yelling and releasing the healing ladybugs that swarm the tower and the hole.

Sighing, Adrien goes to pull out his phone to start texting Nino on what happened and where he is. He needs to keep in mind that ‘Adrien’ doesn’t know anything other than that Simon Says was chasing them.

He doesn’t get very far. Not when just twitching his right hand sends a flare of pain all the way up through his shoulder.

Logically, he tells himself as he looks down to that hand, it’s a good thing that he has his hand. He would have 100% given it up if it means Nino would live, so he really ought to be glad that he has a hand at all.

But it’s black. Blacker than the night sky. Blacker than black. So black it looks dead. His fingernails are even black. He can’t see any lines or his knuckles or anything. Like a shadow given shape.

Blacker for the fact that a ring rests on one of his fingers. With sharp silver fangs glinting over the void that is his hand.

“Wow… Kit, that was a doozy.” Plagg blinks and shakes his head, staring down at the hand. “Oh, uh, that doesn’t look right.”

No. It’s been a long time since Adrien’s seen any of the black scarring left from the ring. If anything, he thought he was all healed up from it, or that it was fading. Now, well, it still doesn’t matter. It’s never really mattered, because it doesn’t really mean anything. Just that his transformation left such an impression it carried over.

It doesn’t matter.

His next breath leaves as a slight wheezes, and he has to swallow and blink back tears.

Plagg waves one of his arms, and just like before, it goes away. Because Plagg’s absorbing it back. Sure, Plagg goes faint again, much more than before. But that’ll be fixed with enough napping and cheese and just like before this will all be behind them. Speaking of…

Adrien pulls out all the cheese he has on him, freely giving it to his friend without so much of a tease as he looks back to Ladybug and starts texting Nino.

She looks so strong, confident as she faces the cameras. If he strains, he can get clips of her voice among the sea of clamoring reporters. Saying that she and Chat Noir will rise to any threat that Hawk Moth poses, telling them not to worry.

One of them, claiming due to all the damages that this akuma has done, asks for an official interview.

Gasping, looking up from his phone, Adrien stares at her when Ladybug responds that she’ll have to coordinate with him first.

That wasn’t a no.

It’s always a no.

“Shit,” Pressing further into the shadows, keeping away from everyone, Adrien rubs at his eyes. “Damnit.”

Plagg looks up at him, still nibbling at his cheese “Hmm?”

“It’s nothing… just thinking about Father…” He does need to get out there, and he texts his bodyguard quickly as to get out of there as fast as possible. It’s just, he just doesn’t want to deal with the public. He can see why it’s needed, after today, but his responsibility is to keep people safe. Not to hold their hand and feed them lies so they don’t tangle him all up.

He feels a bit better when his phone buzzes with a text from Nino. And he immediately makes a decision. Staying over at Nino’s tonight, where it’ll be warm and loud and cozy, is always preferable to his big, empty room.

Besides, his nightmares suck on an ordinary night. And while he hopes not to get them at all as to not bother Nino, he can’t lie and saying he’ll be relieved to know that Nino’s alive and well if he wakes with a nightmare of today without his cataclysm.

Chapter 6: Recoil

With a sigh, Adrien tilts his head back against the door and slides down to the floor.

Honestly, it could have been worse.

Sure, he’s grounded. He’s been grounded before. It would have been nice to know how long he’s getting grounded for. And it’s not like Father even really yelled at him. Just took his phone. Told him he’s grounded. Then, only when Adrien tried to ask how long, only said that he doesn’t have to explain himself to a child.

So, it’s not like he got yelled at.

It would have been nice to know why. To be given an answer, but at least he wasn’t scolded.  

At least he had the sense to bite back his age, to scowl and say he’s seventeen and shouldn’t be treated like this. He saves Paris, he’s in a relationship, he stays on top of his studies and everything else, surely he can handle responsibility? Surely he’s proven that he can be trusted with this?

Plagg burrows himself into his hair, messing with it. “Let’s just stay here for a moment. World doesn’t exist right now.”

Adrien nods, slowly as not to disturb Plagg, and tries not think about what’ll happen when he goes out. Ladybug as every right to be concerned. He left her a mess and the masses to clean up. And she won’t be too rough because she knows how close he came to failing Nino. In fact, he’s relying on that to convince her to have Nino be a permanent hero.

Nothing about that has really changed. He needs to talk to Ladybug about it tonight so she can address the whole team about it tomorrow. This is for Nino. And for Rena. Adrien doesn’t know how much danger she gets into as a civilian, but she might need this as well.

If anything, seeing her texts is a good thing because now Adrien knows how to prep himself going in. It’s not like she said anything new either. After what he did, anyone would be worried. Nino was worried. And Plagg’s acting fussy like how he does whenever Adrien exposes himself like this.

And, if he could show her that putting him on the sidelines may mean there’ll be instances when he wouldn’t be there to save someone, then she clearly won’t do that.

He- he needs to be Chat Noir. Paris needs him to be Chat Noir. He’s good at it, and he can’t let down everyone who’s counting on him. He can’t just let it go because he’s getting better at wielding destruction. He can’t go back to just Adrien because he’s too good at being a superhero.

Honestly, if anything, Ladybug should be happy about this rather than saying how worried she is about him. Nothing’s ever happened and nothing will.

Which is what he’ll say to her.

Once he gets up.

Eventually.

He lingers longer, imagining how nice it’ll be once he gets back to Nino’s. They’ll cuddle up on the couch and watch some show, picking it apart- or mostly Nino will be picking it apart and how it could be better- and Adrien will just be able to see him and listen to him and get to see Noel and it’ll just be great.

After he gets through Ladybug. So he thinks about how to talk to her. Comes up with a few counter arguments just in case and other ways to deescalate the situation in case it gets out of hand.

It’s because of how sensitive she still is about using more of the miraculous that will make this conversation delicate. He honestly needs to lean away from that as much as he can. Maybe tie in on having more heroes will lessen the need for that. She’s mentioned that before, so, she should be happy about that. That should make her happy.

“Okay, Plagg,” Adrien gets up, heading to his desk to grab his cheese. “Are you sure you’re good? You’ve had a rough day too.”

Plagg, who looks kinda unhealthy with how… faint he is, floats over and grabs the cheese. But he doesn’t eat it immediately. He just holds it in between his arms for such a long time without eating it that Adrien has to look away so his friend doesn’t get self-conscious.

He should have taken better care of Plagg, his needs are important too.

“Kit,” Plagg sighs, “I- I’m sorry.”

Adrien frowns, “Uh, what for?”

“Okay, well, so I don’t really know what happened today.” Plagg huffs, eyes dropping down into a glare to the table. “None of the other holders have never done anything like it.”

Adrien nods, he expected as much when he’s already done quite a few things that Plagg said the same thing. He doesn’t understand why they never even bothered to try, especially when they had so much training about control, but maybe they didn’t have a pressing need to be better. Maybe, when their skin started getting scarred from it, they ran from it rather than just asking Plagg for help.

Which, Adrien still stands by his stance that they were idiots to not have the kwamis help them. Who would know better than them?

Plagg takes a deep breath, “And- okay, so, the thing is, Pigtails is going to make a mention of it.”

“Are you-”

“Because Tikki’s going to say something.”

“Plagg, it’s alri-”

“And Tikki will convince Ladybug for you to stop using the ring at all.” Plagg droops in the air. Sitting on the desk. “I’m sorry Kit, I didn’t want to tell you. But, I can’t ignore it. It’ll happen.”

Adrien collapses down on his chair, “Don’t worry, I’ll-”

“Kit, just don’t let her take the ring.” Plagg stares down at his cheese. “She’ll ask for it, and she’ll mean well. She’ll want you to heal. This is how you heal.”

“Plagg…” Adrien folds his arms on the desk, lowering his head to Plagg. “Do you think I need to heal?”

Plagg glances at him, tilts his head back down. “Take… take off your shirt, Kit.”

“Um… what?”

“It’ll be your answer.”

Confused, increasingly worried, Adrien pulls off his shirt. And he looks normal. Maybe a little more frail and pale and thinner than when he first got the ring, but not bad. Still healthy.

Then Plagg curls up even more, becoming solid again, and the black scars burst on his skin.

Adrien gasps. He can’t help it.

Elbow down has the same absolute black that he saw earlier, and then there’s still long slashes of these scars covering most of his upper arm as they reach and curl over his shoulder. Puttering out and fading as they branch out towards his chest. And- and surely what he did today wasn’t as big of a deal as catastrophe? It shouldn’t have done this when…

“They…” Adrien swallows, “They were never healing, were they? You just got better at keeping them hidden.”

Plagg doesn’t say anything. Which is confirmation enough.

“Is it…” Adrien swallows, lifts both his hands up to watch them flex and turn. Black and white. It looks like two hands that would never be attached to the same person. Especially since the nails in his right hand are sharper, and he can’t completely straighten the fingers. But… but that doesn’t really matter. His hand has stopped hurting, just an ache and exhausted in the muscles now. “Is it really all that bad?”

Plagg scoffs, “You didn’t have a hand.”

“And I’m not going to complain every time I lose the tail either, because I know I’ll get it back.”

Plagg just gives him a look at that, and Adrien tries not to gulp at it. He… he needs Plagg to be honest with him here. He needs Plagg to trust that Adrien can handle this. Adrien knows that there’s a lot that Plagg knows, and he knows that he isn’t entitled to it or Plagg believes that it isn’t important. Plagg’s never- he’s always been there for him. Very rarely talks down to him.

Adrien clenches his jaw at the thought that Plagg will tell him he can’t take it. Because, because sure he’s let down Father and Ladybug, but he thought- with Plagg, it feels like he’s always been enough and he can’t- he can’t be the only one who thinks that. Who believes that- that he- that they can do this.

After a long blink, Plagg looks to the side. “Kwamis get tired because when we merge, human bodies want to reject us and we have to fight to keep the balance.”

“What?” Adrien frowns, a distant part of him noting to write this down but mostly just the turn of the conversation throws him. “But… but it feels great transformed, and- I- I don’t get it.”

“Lots of things feel great when they aren’t good for you.” Plagg shrugs, “Don’t you remember how you could barely call a single cataclysm before feeling like you were going to detransform?”

Nodding, because yeah and that sucked and was largely inconvenient. It was the first thing he started practicing, barring of course the runs and training he and Ladybug did together, trying to do multiple cataclysms until it wasn’t so draining.

Now that he thinks of it, Plagg gave him a weird look the first time he did that. He didn’t question it at the time, they didn’t really know each other then.

“But now I’ve trained and we’ve spent months together, I’m stronger now.” Adrien scratches between Plagg’s ears, his smile twitching down when Plagg doesn’t even scowl or try to swat him for that. Is it really… is it really this big? “Why would I need to heal now?”

“I- I didn’t feel all that tired after you did that. I did, of course I did, but I was expecting to practically pass out from keeping you stable. And-” Plagg hisses, glaring so harshly to the side that Adrien straightens up a bit off the table. “And I didn’t. I didn’t! I swear- it never was meant to get- get like this! I thought- I thought maybe it’s supposed to be like this! With someone who resonates! The scars! That you couldn’t get hurt by them! Even when it was a lot- not like the others who would- but- but still! You resonated! You couldn’t get hurt! But now-”

Plagg throws his cheese at that. Adrien catches it, more out of instinct that Plagg’s cheese can’t ever, ever hit the ground, and just stares at the kwami quivering a few inches above his desk.

“All of the others- they know what that’s like! Know what- they- and I- all my holders just ended up-” Plagg scowls and shakes his head. “But no, your body just has to think that destruction is good for it or something! It doesn’t reject destruction and now you’re getting hurt!”

“I-”

Adrien was going to say something about how it doesn’t feel good. How he feels sick and faint after using too much of Plagg’s powers. How sore he gets. But he’s getting stronger. That everyone feels that way when they push too hard. He doesn’t need to heal; he simply needs to rest from the sound of it.

“I thought it was fine, those other times. You recovered. But if Tikki says this, then I don’t get to have this. And fine. Fine! She knows more about humans and their bodies than me. Just don’t let her take the ring!”

“Plagg!” Adrien stands up, mouth twisting because he doesn’t know what to say and his eyes are burning and hands are clenched all in an effort to not let this go. “We are not getting benched.”

“You don’t understand, Kit-”

“Neither of us do!”

There was more he was going to say. Some argument that he has not fought for all of this just to give it all up now. If he can’t fight, then Rena and Carapace will be forced to be heroes without a choice. They need to have a choice. Adrien isn’t going to force them into this. And he can’t lose this all now.

He refuses to go back to that shut in of a life. Never living. Having no one in his life to be with and be there for.

He refuses to let Plagg go. Not like this, not when Plagg doesn’t want to and is so upset. Just no.

Yet Plagg just looks at him and that confidence isn’t there. With those such big eyes that usually sparkle with mischief or squint or are rolling at him now… they now tremble up at him. Because yeah, Adrien knows that Plagg doesn’t know. Only scraps. Hints. Never the full picture.

But- a deeper, angry part hisses- Tikki does get to, apparently.

Adrien lets out a slow sigh. “I wasn’t lying, earlier. I want this.”

“How can-” Plagg shakes his head. “Nobody wants this. You’d been happier with Daizzi or maybe Duusu. Liiri, actually.”

“No.”

“You haven’t transformed with them. You’ve only felt destruction. Everything feels better than this- than constantly crumbling apart!”

Adrien takes a deep breath, taking the moment to remember those kwamis. “I have felt joy because I was able to break out of here. I can imagine better futures because I broke the idea it was all helpless. Sure, yes, it hurts. It hurts so much when the powers are too much. But you don’t get to say that it isn’t worth it, that it hurts more than it gives.”

“Kit-”

“Yes, Plagg, you absolutely destroyed the life I had. And you know what? I will never stop being grateful for it.” Adrien sniffs, swallowing a sudden lump in his throat. “So, so you don’t- you don’t get say- I want you to be here when we destroy this one too and get something better out of it.”

Plagg stares at him for a long time, eyes trembling as his ears twitch, and Adrien mentally begs him to say something. To say he’ll fight too. That it won’t just be Adrien scrambling for this. He doesn’t want to do it without Plagg. He’s not even sure he can.

But, even if he can, he just can’t take it if Plagg says it’s not worth it.

With a sniff, Plagg zooms into his chest. “You’re… you’re the best Chat Noir I’ve ever had.”

Adrien sniffs too, cradling him to his chest and building whatever strength he needs to face Ladybug. He needs to convince her. He won’t let Plagg down.

“Come on,” Adrien pulls back and hands Plagg his cheese, “We’ve got to prove that to Ladybug.”

“Okay, that’s good,” Plagg nods, and then rubs the back of his head. “But, well, since we’re doing all this open communication stuff, there might be something else you should know.”

Oh god, now what?

At whatever his face does, Plagg scoffs loudly. “Oh please, this isn’t anything like that. Stop with the face.”

“Then, well, what is it?”

“So, uh, you’re not really normal anymore.”

Adrien takes a deep breath, and then very obviously stares at his hand that completely black. Which is maybe rude, but he feels a little drained from their previous conversation and he still has to talk to Ladybug and there was already so much that happened today and…

“Not just miraculous not normal! But like…” Plagg jabs sharply in the air, “Like no longer human normal.”

“Oh,” Adrien sighs and clutches a hand over his heart, “I thought my sudden ease in fencing and hearing everything all the time was just some sort of late puberty thing. Oh, god, Plagg, how could you do this to me? I can’t believe-”

He breaks into a chuckle when Plagg swats at him. “Also not what I’m talking about Kit!”

That does actually pull Adrien’s attention, his chuckles petering out as he raises an eyebrow at Plagg. Since, if it’s something else, then he would have noticed it by now, surely?

And, if it’s something else, then maybe Adrien is too in over his head. He thought he understood. He thought he finally had the whole picture, that Plagg trusted him with it. But, if that isn’t the case, if this ends up being something huge and unavoidable, maybe it doesn’t even matter what he wants or if he’s willing to fight for it.

Adrien takes a deep breath, pushes it all down because Plagg is willing to fight and so is he. “Alright. Come on then, it can’t be as bad as what we literally just went through.”

“I just… I don’t want you to feel weird.” Plagg slowly drags the words out of his mouth, and Adrien decides to not exaggerate his congratulations on speaking honestly. Maybe if he was with Chloe, since she has so little humor in her life, but not now.

“It’s okay, I’m sure I’ll feel better to know… whatever this is.”

Plagg nods, “Yeah, well, it’s not bad now.”

“Plagg,” Adrien inhales slowly and tries not to think about that line, “Please, just say it. I want to hear it.”

“Right, yeah. So, well, you were a little right with your fencing thing. But it’s not superhuman as it is supercat.”

“But… uh, wait, you’re seriously a cat? I thought-” Adrien ignores how his voice pitches as he realizes what it is that Plagg said- “That the order kinda made you adopt the whole cat image.”

“I mean, Loong would know more ‘cause he’s a nerd but it had something about us taking the forms of animals that we’re most similar to.”

“And how the fuck is a black cat related to destruction? Or a ladybug to creation!”

“Seriously? This is what makes you swear! Not the entire conversation we had before?”

“Well, well I-” Adrien sputters, not having a good answer for that except for out of the blue this is and he was really only thinking that he’d only have one revelation. Not that he’s becoming one with destruction and he’s not exactly human at the same time. “Shut up. I just- it’s going to… like, I’m not going to turn into a cat? Like, I’m not growing or tail- oh god, am I going to grow a tail?”

“No!” Plagg recoils with wide eyes. “That’s way too far! Just, like, some minor physical changes. And like, you kinda smell like a cat but that’s been a while now and stuff like that.”

Stuff like that, Plagg says. Completely normal. Or, more importantly, not noticeable to others.

“Okay,” Adrien slowly exhales and tells himself that this isn’t an urgent issue. “So this isn’t really a big deal. Got it. I totally will want some more explanation later on it-” Adrien ignores Plagg’s usual scoff whenever Adrien tries to get information out of him- “and you are not getting out of it. But, right now, we’re going to get through this thing with Ladybug and then I’m going to Nino’s and we’re going to have a nice, normal night and leave all of this for the morning.”

With a nod, Plagg finally swallows up his cheese. “It kinda sounded like you just jinx it-” Adrien immediately moves to knock on wood because he just can’t have an akuma tonight- “but that does sound like one of your better plans.”

“Alright then, Plagg” Adrien claps, all that worry from their conversation fizzling out as they share a bright grin with each other. The ring already crackling with green lightning. “Claws out!”

The transformation feels right, wanted. Flowing through him as naturally as his blood. Sure, it can be unhealthy, but Adrien can’t believe for a second that it isn’t supposed to be there. That it’s wrong for it to be there. How can it be wrong when it’s been the answer to everything? When this power, this apparently so terrible power, has given him the life he wants and the means to keep it safe?

He stuffs some food and drink mixes and cheese into his baton for later, just in case, and because it’s always good to have snacks. Especially since he doesn’t plan on coming back here tonight. That he’ll ultimately end up at Nino’s no matter what.

It’ll be a good night because of that regardless.

With a little luck, Adrien can make it a better one.

The sunset lights up Paris with almost a magic fire. Adrien relishes in it as he leaps through the streets, basking in the glow of the city until Ladybug catches word of him being out and about.

He originally was going to text her, going to meet with her as soon as possible. Yet… since he isn’t going to go out on a run tonight, maybe he can do some nice things now.

“Hello,” Adrien lands next to a pair of confused tourists, smiling as the man put the map down. “Do you need any help?”

The person blinks at him, taking a slight step in front of his companion who’s also staring blankly at him.

Which, huh, maybe they haven’t heard of him. Seems a little strange, but, oh well, it could also just be a little shock and awe.

“Chat Noir,” He bows, “At your service.”

“Dad,” She hisses, “This was the thing earlier.”

Oof, okay, yeah, that was a pretty big thing and he opens his mouth to try and explain or smooth it over-

The dad nudges the daughter away, “Okay, yeah… Chat Noir. Just- just stick with the magic monsters and, uh, please, we wouldn’t want to take up your time.”

“Oh, uh…” He swallows, feeling strange and weird at that. “I mean, of course I’ll deal with any akumas, but I can also help with not magical stuff too if you need-”

“No, no, that’s okay. My daughter-”

“We’re about to use GSP, so we’re good. Thank you though. But, yeah, you can go.”

He shakes off the feeling, smiling wide and giving a two fingered wave. “Alright! You guys travel safely!”

Then he’s off, baton buzzing with messages, and wishes he could destroy this feeling. It feels weird, but Adrien shrugs it off. If they are tourists maybe having a strange cat superhero drop in on them throws them. It’s understandable. Nothing weird about it.

“Sorry I’m late, LB.” Hopping down, he smiles wide when she whirls on him. “Family wouldn’t let me out.”

Her gaze is steel, but he’s smiled in front of gold before. He can do this. He just- he needs to be like Chloe. A… gentle Chloe. Because this is for Plagg, for Nino, and everyone else he can do good for as Chat Noir. He needs to be there for them. They’ve asked him, shown it, and Adrien must fulfill.

“Chat,” Ladybug takes a deep breath, “Thank you. For, for saving him.”

Adrien’s chest tightens- it’s been doing that at very mention of that as if to remind him to make sure that doesn’t happen- and he nods. “I, of course, I don’t- can’t let… that ever happen. And, thank you, for handling everything I just left behind. I know it wasn’t easy with how I dealt with it.”

Mentioning the idea for Nino to be a permanent hero might work now. Or, actually, they should probably hash this out before Adrien brings that up. It seems that Ladybug’s more grateful than anything else. Maybe Plagg was wrong. Maybe she won’t even bring up anything like that.

Because they’re a team. Ladybug wouldn’t just make a demand of him without any reasoning.

“The physical damage wasn’t extensive.” The steel comes back, even if Ladybug turns to face the city. “Did you look at the reports?”

“Ah, no, I, uh, I didn’t really want to think about it anymore.” Adrien kept getting shaky in the car. “But, well, you should know that what I did was-”

“What you did was dangerous on a level I can’t even find the words for.” That gaze locks onto his. “I understand you were panicked, and I’m so glad that you saved him, but you need to realize that you could have demolished buildings with that power. You could have destroyed the entire surface of the Earth in trying to keep him from hitting the ground.”

Adrien lowers his head, “It was reckless, but I wasn’t ever not in control.”

“Chat-”

“These are my powers, Ladybug, and I know them best.” Taking a deep breath, he raises his head. “Yes, it was risky. Yes, it hurt. Yes, I don’t think I replicate what I did and nor do I want to. Yes, I understand your concern. But no, I would never endanger people with them. I would never allow my powers, even if they’re breaking from me, to have the ability to destroy people.”

Ladybug turns away, arms coming up to her sides. “You can’t make that promise. You can’t possibly understand the ripple effect that could happen from everything that you destroy.”

Adrien lowers his eyes. He doesn’t have anything to say about that. His powers are more likely to cause an unforeseen event than any of the other hero’s.

“And-” Her voice cracks- “And you keep destroying yourself the more you use the miraculous.”

“That’s not true.” Now that, Adrien can counter. “That implies I’m getting weaker when that couldn’t be more wrong.”

“You just-” She whips around, hands bunched at her face- “You’ve managed to lose your arms- BOTH OF THEM- within a week! You just said this is hurting you and I- I can’t fix it! Nothing I’ve thought of fixes this or otherwise you wouldn’t be in pain!”

“It doesn’t really hurt that badly-”

Ladybug stares at him, stares and takes a breath before tilting her shoulders back and standing up strong in front of him. “I’ve seen otherwise.”

Adrien’s gut quivers and tells him to leave before he can do anymore damage. That she’s going to only get more angry and more upset with him. That she’s going to take everything from him until he can prove that he’s prefect again. That he messed up, that he should have been better and then she wouldn’t have to think that he’s weak and can’t possibly handle this.

But he can, because Plagg’s behind him on this. He has to.

“Ladybug,” He takes a deep breath and looks in her eyes. For about a second before glancing to the side. “Can you tell me what you’re getting at? I don’t see what I did wrong, and I definitely don’t know what you want me to do right now.”

That’s not true. He hates that it isn’t true. That he can’t believe that his partner would do this. But it is true. He does believe it. She’s been hinting at this, growing more and more concerned, and Adrien only pushed her to consider the very thing that she sees hurting him.

He’s such an idiot. This conversation could have gone so differently if he just stopped bringing that up.

Next time, every time, Adrien won’t ever bring it up. Won’t bring up anything that puts this in jeopardy. If he ever does something with his experimentation, he’ll bring up some excuse or another reason on how he knows. Not because he tampered.

“I-” Her composure cracks, biting her lip as her eyes dart away- “I want you stay fighting. You’re- you’re so good Chat and I don’t want to do this without you but, but you can’t just use destruction without it leaking back into you and I can’t- I’m- you can’t just wither away in front of me like this. Please.”

She sounds so desperate and he has to close his eyes. Closing his eyes, because he can’t agree to that despite how her eyes plead at him, he promised Plagg. He promised that, and he shakes his head. Unable to speak up.

“I know it’ll be rough, but- but POLLEN!” She practically screams it, and it flinches him into opening his eyes. Where Ladybug has a manic grin on her face. “You can be the bee hero! Heh, bee the bee hero- the puns will come naturally with that! You’ll be great at it and you can still fight and none of this will happen and isn’t that a great plan? You don’t have to be in pain and you don’t have to anything and it’s all fine we can avoid all the issues and nothing really needs to change now that all the risks are gone. You won’t be- this works.” Ladybug babbles, pacing and nodding, ending with such a wide smile and slumped shoulders and tearing eyes.

His chest breaks. She looks so sad and alone and he can’t comfort her because-

“I’m not meant to wield another miraculous.” He mutters, forcing something to come out and looking away as the devastation hits Ladybug. “Plagg chose me, and I choose him.”

“But- but this is killing you- this could kill you- don’t you see that? Please, Chat, just put yourself first. Your safety is on the line so, so please, can’t you care about that more than anything else?”

“What about…” Adrien swallows, “I don’t use any of my powers. No cataclysm. No catastrophe. I will be a part of the restoration if necessary, and I need to free people from Hawk Moth’s magic after the akuma is broken.”

“You don’t need to do that if it’s hurting you.” Ladybug sighs and rubs at her temples. “Yeah, I hate saying it. But Gabriel Agreste did fine without it. It looks uncomfortable and nasty, but it doesn’t leave any trauma behind. You shouldn’t have to suffer because of it.”

“It takes as much out of me as you purifying an akuma, I’m doing it.”

“Okay, okay,” Ladybug rubs her eyes now, “Tikki was clear. She’s seen this. You need to let your body repair or it will give out on you. You can’t be connected to Plagg anymore”

“NO!” It bursts from him and then he instantly swallows, curling back because shit, shit, he shouldn’t have yelled back that doesn’t end good. This isn’t how he wanted to bring this in, he shouldn’t have yelled. He shouldn’t have- oh god, how could he have done that-

“What about, I’m sorry- but like, um, what about having Carapace and Rena Rouge be full time heroes from now on? Then it’ll be better and I won’t need to use the ring so much and then I’ll just heal slower and that’ll be… that’s okay?”

Ladybug opens her mouth, takes a step forward and he takes a step back, and she hesitates. “Well, it would be easier… but maybe we shouldn’t.”

“But- but didn’t you say-”

“Just look at you!” Ladybug waves wildly at his direction (he takes another small step back), “Do you want to do this to someone else? We can’t ask them to suffer for us!”

Adrien turns his head away, unable to stomach the idea of letting her see the face he needs to pull to compose himself. She doesn’t mean it like that. It only takes a second or two to pull his thoughts together.

“Even if I’m using the bee miraculous, I can’t use it very well. We need backup, I promised Nino.”

Ladybug inhales at that, and then there’s a very long pause. “You promised… Nino.”

“He almost died today, LB.” He whispers it to the ground, wishing that both the truth and the lies weren’t necessary. “He was in shock, and I promised him that we’d make it so that this doesn’t happen. And with more holders, especially if I’m going to be sidelined, we can do that. We need to cover all of Paris, the more of us there are, the less time it will take for someone to arrive.”

When he finally gets his head up and towards her, feeling better at her relieved sigh, he only sees Ladybug’s pigtails.

“The moment I stop appearing and a new bee hero does, even if I prove I’m not a newbie, he’s going to push. And if he’s willing to k- kill-” Adrien swallows, “You have to consider it. We don’t have to force them. We can ask, explain to them and train them so they don’t have to go through what we did, but we need to ask.”

“I hear you.” Ladybug paces some more. “And yes, but- but I’ll have to- I need to make sure it’s a good idea. And-” She swallows, sighs heavily, peeks and bites her lip- “Does this mean you’ll take the bee miraculous then?”

Damn, Adrien was hoping they wouldn’t circle back to that. But, well, he got one thing, he can probably do this too.

He needs to at least keep Plagg’s promise.

“You can’t ask me to give up the ring.”

“It’s hurting you-”

“You can’t ask me to give up Plagg. He- I won’t do it. I am not handing over this ring.” Adrien takes a deep breath and faces her. At least her eyes aren’t as sharp. Just sad.

Disappointed. Because he’s always a disappointment.

(Not to Nino. He grabs that as hard as he can in his head and curls around it. Not to Nino. Not to Plagg. And even if it’s just them, even if everyone else he just fails and fails despite all that they do for him, at least he has them. He has them and they have him and he is going to fight for that.)

But he will stand on this and fight. He doesn’t want to, he’d never want to fight Ladybug, but he won’t abandon Plagg.

“He told me that he doesn’t want to leave. So even if I don’t use the ring, I am not going to force him to do something he doesn’t want to and something I don’t want to happen. I’m not doing that to him.”

Ladybug closes her eyes and lets out a long sigh, “Tikki was clear, you need to take off the ring. But… maybe…” She paces some more, pulls at a pigtail. “It can’t be that bad. As long as you just use the bee, that shouldn’t- they should make it okay?”

It’s clearly a question. She doesn’t know. He definitely doesn’t know since he has no experience with holding two miraculouses at once. He doesn’t know where she expects an answer to come from.

So he gives her the one he wants to happen. “Yeah, plus, with Plagg there, he can tell me once I’ve lost a connection to the ring because of using the comb. It’ll work this way.”

Ladybug nods eagerly. “I don’t see anything wrong with that. I’ll talk with- with Tikki, relay it through Pollen. She’ll come to you tonight.”

“Make it in the morning?” He holds his hands out, trying to squash the disappointment at he won’t be able to linger at Nino’s like he was hoping for, and shrugs at the blink he gets. “I’m- I have a thing tonight, but I won’t be around anyone in the morning. Like, send it an hour before our patrol?”

“Okay, okay, yeah, that’s fine.” Letting out a massive breath, Ladybug smiles at him. A big, massive smile that makes his chest feel tight but shoulders loose as his lips wobble up in return. “And thank you Chat, I know what I asked for isn’t easy. Thank you for listening though, I really am just concerned for you. I don’t want you to go, and I don’t want you hurt.”

“I know,” He says it. Fighting back against the lump in his throat. “But, uh, how exactly is Pollen going to find me?”

Ladybug shrugs, “The kwamis say since you pulled them here, they can sense your soul. I’ll leave it to them.”

“Okay, okay,” Since, phew, as nice as it would be if Nooroo could just fly to them. He isn’t jazzed about the idea of Hawk Moth being able to find him. “I think I’ll take off early. Good night, Ladybug.”

“Good night, kitty.”

Leaping away, Adrien heads to Nino’s after sending a quick text to let him know he’s on his way. He doesn’t hide for a bit, wanting to be seen before he goes offline, but does once he gets close to the apartment’s roof. He doesn’t want to show up to Nino’s as a mess. They don’t need that today.

“Claws in,” Adrien smiles as the light fades from Plagg and hands him some cheese. “You aren’t going anywhere buddy.”

“Hmph, never had any doubts.”

Adrien nods, and that’ll just be that then. He won’t poke at Plagg’s low moments.

“But Ladybug doesn’t want me to transform with the ring until I’m ‘cured’ and would rather me fight with the bee.” Adrien twists it on his finger. “But, like, as long as she doesn’t see me transformed, how can she know? She just doesn’t get how this isn’t… this isn’t what she thinks it is.”

Plagg smirks at him, “I’ve trained you well.”

“Shut up. And I feel fine, and if I’m not transforming doing that powerful fighting stuff then what’s the harm? She talked about what Tikki knows, but she was only seeing the outcomes, she doesn’t really know what was happening. Or, she didn’t have Ladybug relay that.”

Plagg shrugs then nods. “That’s fair, my previous holders couldn’t do half the things you could. Even if they were more skilled fighters, I was always exhausted even when they used a small amount of my powers.”

“Yeah,” Adrien breathes a sigh of relief, “Yeah, this is a good plan.”

“And transforming for travelling isn’t a big deal. It’s not like you’re using destruction, just a little speed boost.”

Nodding, Adrien smiles at Plagg. “It’s not like I can sneak around any other way. So, if anything, we just get to hang out with Pollen for a while, it’s not a big deal.” They nod to each other for a few seconds, and Adrien lifts a hand to knock on the window. Keeps it there. Only an inch from the glass.

Maybe Nino wants to rest. Or freak out alone without anyone watching him. Or maybe his family doesn’t want to let him out of their sight, or-

“Hey,” Plagg nudges him, “Go no. I need a nap already.”

Rolling his eyes, Adrien taps on the window and gives a little wave when Nino startles.

“Dude!” Nino throws it open and grabs one of his arms to help pull him in. “What the hell? How’d you get on the window?”

“I’m just that talented.” Chuckling, Adrien looks down and scratches the back of his neck. “Um… kinda had to since I got grounded…”

“For what?!”

“Lots of little things, today just pushed the scales a little too much.” Shrugging, not wanting to admit that he doesn’t know and have Nino threaten to go yell at Father (which would worsen his opinion of Nino again and is it too much to ask for them to just be separate?), Adrien turns to Nino.

Freezing, suddenly struck by how much Nino is in this room and how lifeless it would be without him, Adrien swallows as Nino sighs and grumbles at how his old man needs to know when to back off as he saves some of his work on the computer.

Adrien doesn’t know how he managed to get any work done. How he managed to make any music when, when he nearly died, when the beat of his heart was almost silenced. And if that happened, all of these half done songs would forever be wrong. Even if someone else tried to finish them, they would always be different from what Nino would do.

“Can-” Adrien’s voice catches and shatters, Nino whipping around- “Can I hug you?”

Adrien may be the one with cat miraculous, but he doesn’t even get the chance to blink before there’s Nino squeezing him and is in his arms and that glorious heartbeat is right there pressed up to his.

“Today was something else, huh?” Nino mutters into his shoulder.

“Part of me wants to wipe it out existence but then I wouldn’t have gotten you to see you win…” Adrien tilts his head into Nino’s, greedily breathing in. “So we could just get rid of the rest of the day after that.”

Chuckling, a bit stiff and a bit too thick, Nino nods. “Fine by me. Though Alya might also ask that we keep the part with Ladybug.” With a forced huff, Nino shakes his head. “Like, she calls to ask I’m alright and everything and that goes on for, like, an hour and it’s good and then she’s all excited about the chance for an interview and then apologizing for it… but I guess that’s Alya for you. She can… it’s like her brain plays pong with her emotions. I think she just wants to try and… distract herself from it. You know?”

Stiffening, and hating himself for that, because he forgot that and since Ladybug didn’t bring it up tonight that means it’s going to be brought up tomorrow. Just another thing he has to deal with then.

“Hey,” Nino rubs his hand up and down, “What’s wrong?”

“It’s stupid… don’t worry about it.”

Nino pulls back slightly- Adrien clutching onto him that much tighter- and smiles at him. “Dude, I know a lot happened. And I know it would be hell on you to watch that, but please don’t pull away ‘cause of that.”

“Nino…” Blinking at him, at the stupidly earnest face that just said something way too casual, he just can’t do much than shake his head at it.

“I’m serious dude, I-” Nino blows out a sigh and drops his forehead onto his shoulder- “Can I be real with you for a sec?”

Adrien immediately nods, “Of course, I’m here for you.”

He glances down at his ring pressing into one of Nino’s shoulders right now. He’d do so much for Nino to be here, anything within his powers.

“I was falling, and, heh, yeah, it was terrifying and like I can’t really think about it without- ughh…. So, anyway, umm…” Nino lets out a shaky breath, tensing, and Adrien rubs circles into his back. “But god, I can’t even describe it, but I just wasn’t- after…”

“It’s okay… take your time,” He murmurs.

“Chat Noir man… I, I don’t know what the videos look but it can’t be what I saw or Alya would be asking about it- but he, shit, man, it looked- it wasn’t- he didn’t even look human. Like some sort of… I don’t know, it was just unreal.” Nino chuckles hoarsely. “Like, I know, I know, superhero and all that. And we’ve seen him do so much, but this was on a completely different level. Not even that. He was like… a major boss in Dark Souls or something.”

Good thing Nino can’t see his facial reactions to this, it’s all Adrien can do just to keep his body in check.

“Can…” Swallowing, not wanting to push but craving the answers at the same time, Adrien closes his eyes. “That actually sounds terrifying.”

“No!” Nino’s glasses hurt when he shakes his head against his shoulder until they just fall off. “It was- he was so determined- literally glowing with it! I… I didn’t feel scared anymore. Or maybe I was just shocked and couldn’t but well, I don’t know. Just it honestly looked like he could move the moon and I just knew that I’d be fine.”

“Nino…”

“Okay, yeah, I was shaky and the whole still sucked and 0, -1000, out of 10 never do it again. But, I think we’ve all sorta forgotten that he’s basically destruction in the flesh. Like, god, Hawk Moth just better go into hiding because he- the way he screamed, it felt like I was in the middle of some hurricane all hellbent on only hurting one person.”

Adrien sighs, conflicted, but he can live with that if Nino feels protected. “I… God, Nino, I’m just so happy you’re okay. If it was up to me, none of it would happen, but I do feel better knowing that… that he’s protecting us.”

“Right?” Nino leans back, wipes at his face, “I just, I hate that Hawk Moth is still out there, but with him and Ladybug out there? It’s like nothing that bad has even happened when you think about how much worse it could be.”

“And there are other heroes showing up as well,” Smiling at Nino, Adrien wishes that he could sing Carapace’s praises to the same extent. “I mean, Hawk Moth is only ever going to be just Hawk Moth. But Ladybug and Chat Noir and Carapace and Rena Rouge and maybe even new heroes are just going to get stronger and stronger and then he’s going down.”

Even after saying all those things about Chat Noir, one of his teammates and someone that Nino’s on equal footing with that only two other people can say, Nino blushes and looks away from Adrien.

Stamping his chuckles into just a huff, Adrien pulls him back. “It’s just, thank you, for sharing.”

“Hm, why?”

“Because, well, I’ve just been thinking how… the simple fact that it happened…” Adrien shakes his head and smiles, “But if you’re so confident that nothing bad can happen, then yeah, they aren’t going to let anything bad happen.”

“Okay,” Nino pulls back, shaking his head like he doesn’t have a big smile on his face. “Now that we’re done with that. Let’s watch some Netflix until there’s nothing left in our brains.”

Adrien blinks when Nino moves to the tv in his room. “But what… doesn’t your family…”

 “Mom’s been smothering me for the last ever, but I got it to turn to Noel.” Nino shrugs, “I feel a bit bad about it, but she needs to cool off a little now that she knows I’m safe.”

“Okay then,” Adrien, in a fit of doubt, has no idea what to do with himself. Does he stand until Nino sits? He’d really rather lay down, today is piling up on his shoulders, but he is a guest still. He should sit on the couch.

“Oh, come on,” Plagg rolls his eyes from the cushion he’s been curled up on. “Just sit down.”

Okay, if Plagg can see that it’s fine and he’s not even human, it’s fine. Definitely fine.

Sitting, and frowning a little when Nino just sits next to him- close enough where their sides are touching but that just doesn’t feel like enough despite being so nice just to have something. Oh well, it amazing that Nino’s here and Adrien has this chance to not think about everything and all that’s happened today.

Actually, considering Puppettear yesterday as well, Adrien really needs to go down there. Tomorrow, after patrol.

Without Pollen… just so she doesn’t have to lie or tell Ladybug about it. He doesn’t want to get into another fight with her so soon. He doesn’t think he can handle it if she freaks about him going behind her back again. If she tells him that he can’t be Chat Noir at all anymore. Saying that she can’t trust him at all anymore.

Or, he could transform with Pollen, that way he can still have some miraculous benefits down there (hopefully bees have night vision) and still talk to Plagg. Maybe he can even try drawing out her symbol too, once he does a few more things that didn’t finish up Friday morning and document all the things that have happened in the past two days.

Maybe he’ll need to do it at night, it’ll be a couple of hours.

He’ll get an energy drink for the morning.

“Hey,” Nino squeezes his hand and Adrien needs to get that out of his head. He’s here right now. He’s here and Nino’s here and he just wants to enjoy that. “This okay?”

Smiling, Adrien leans into him and squeezes back. “Perfect.”

Nino cues up an anime that Adrien tells him that is a must see when he learns Nino’s never seen it. They’re watching the first episode when everything’s just… dark.

“Wha…” Adrien coughs, a headache pulsing behind his eyes, and instantly relaxes when he sees Nino looking down softly at him.

“Dude,” Nino brushes some of the hair flopping over his eyes and stands, “You need to go to sleep.”

“Feels like I just got here…”

Still, he doesn’t resist Nino’s pull up or, startling when Nino lets go of their hands, the clothes shoved into his hands. So he changes when Nino goes to the bathroom and then, since if Plagg can curl up on a pillow, why can’t Adrien? After he drains one of the water bottles that Nino just apparently has in his room. Hopefully it’ll help with the headache.

Reaching out, Adrien softly scratches behind Plagg’s ears. “Sweet dreams, Plagg.”

Plagg grumbles in response, like Adrien hasn’t been telling him good night or sweet dreams for months now and has no cause to stop now even if he’s at someone else’s house.  

Once Nino, finally, gets back, shutting the door to the horrid light coming in, Adrien immediately pulls him in the moment he can. A lot of things happened today. A lot that he doesn’t ever want to happen again, even if there’s always going to be a chance with Hawk Moth around, but he’d do it all again if he gets to have this.

Nino’s head tucked underneath his, Plagg curled up and purring softly between his neck and shoulder, and knowing he can get up and still go patrolling and then to school.

He’ll fight for this for as long as he can.

There’s nothing he won’t do. He’ll destroy anything that threatens this.

Chapter 7: Honeyed Words

Adrien watches Nino’s window, from the blackness speckled with the light from outside morph into a light grey. From experience, Adrien knows it’s just his eyes that think it’s this bright. There’s still an hour-ish until sunrise.

He looked it up. Cats, apparently, are quite active at twilight. He wonders if that’s one of the ‘minor’ things will get tweaked in him. Or if he’s all just messed up from the last couple of days.

But he really just wishes, cat instincts or human emotions aside, that he could just sleep now since Adrien didn’t get the chance to nap yesterday. He did end up falling asleep earlier than he meant to do so, unfortunately cutting into the time he has with Nino, but at least that means he’s awake now and can get back to his room before Pollen shows up.

“Hey,” Adrien whispers it to Nino’s forehead before nuzzling it, “Wake up?”

Nino lets out a sleepy hum, smiling softly, but doesn’t otherwise respond.

Adrien doesn’t have the heart shake him awake.

Slipping out of Nino’s grasp on his arm, Nino now grunting and frowning before curling up around the pillow Adrien uses to replace himself, he finds some spare paper and a pen to write a note down to Nino. He wishes he could say a proper goodbye to Nino, wishes he could hug him again before leaving, but if he doesn’t get back to his room before… well a lot of things could go very badly.

He tries to tell himself that he’ll be seeing Nino later, as Carapace. But Carapace and Chat Noir aren’t dating. Adrien can’t say any of the things he wants to later. He might get the chance Monday, but that’s only if they manage to have a private moment. Everything else will just have to be calls and texts.

Placing the note over Nino’s phone, Adrien nudges Plagg awake on the couch. “Come on buddy, time to get up.”

               The yawn Plagg lets out might be enough to swallow up a whole small orange.

“Claws out,” Glancing back at Nino one last time, Adrien sighs and doesn’t go over to… well he doesn’t know what he wants to do, but just that he wants to be close to Nino again. But no, no. Adrien goes over to the window, slides out of it, and disappears into the city.

There’s definitely a sense of urgency humming in his blood, but Adrien relishes in leaping and running through the city. There’s nothing about this that’s wrong. This is fun, exciting, freeing. It doesn’t hurt. It only has when Adrien’s pushed himself too hard. But that’s normal. Everything will hurt when pushed too hard. But everyone will push harder despite that when they’re trying to do something important. A little bit of pain, a little too much destruction, is worth saving people. This city is worth it.

He shouldn’t be upset at Ladybug though. It’s not like she knows the full picture.

It’s not like she asked either.

His stomach twists up a little bit, but it’s fine. Ladybug has a lot going on too. It sounds like Ladybug has a lot of other responsibilities that she has in her life, responsibilities she wants to partake in and that being Ladybug pulls her away from.

Adrien doesn’t and won’t know her name. But he knows she loves to cook. She’s made off handed comments of sewing and fashion, potential conversations but he doesn’t want to accidentally back himself into a corner in his identity if he says something about a new lineup from Gabriel that isn’t officially released yet.

Ladybug asks for them to be aggressive when she’s babysitting, and apparently whoever she is caring for is very excitable and Ladybug is always wound up a little tighter during the fight.

They’ve ranted and raved over Jagged Stone before, and she recently entered a contest for the latest album cover. She went to a concert with her friends, sings and rocks out with them during sleepovers, and even sings the songs with her parents sometimes.

Adrien wonders, if he had a life like that before Plagg came into his, if he wouldn’t have put up such a fight when Ladybug asked for him to have time off. If he went to school the year before, already was dating Nino and had more time to hang out with the others in the class. If maybe he’d be relieved not to have a city relying on him.

His hand drifts to Mother’s brooch, it hardly ever leaves his pocket and it even carries over into his miraculous pocket unlike most everything else, and wonders that if Mother was still around if he’d do this.

Something too close to relief squeezes his lungs when he realizes he wouldn’t have a lot that he has in his life right now. He might not have been so eager to be Chat Noir. He definitely wouldn’t have gone to school. Never would have met Nino or Alya or Marinette. His relationship with Chloe might be different, they would have never brought some issues or reassured each other of their friendship, and perhaps it would have gotten more and more superficial until they just grew apart. Felix… everything would be different with Felix, but Adrien likes to think that nothing now could get them apart.

Adrien slows to a stop, blinking and pulling out the brooch. It’s… the brooch has almost an ethereal quality to it. Just like Mother…

“I’m sorry,” Adrien breathes it out, rubbing his thumb over the feathers. “I still wish you were here…” He smiles a little, thinking how Mother would light up when Adrien admits to having a crush or when he tells her how he met Jagged Stone or how they could have been there for Chloe. “I’d have so much to tell you, it’d take days just to convince you of it all.”

Yet, as much as it hurts to realize, he’d have very little to say if Mother was still here. He’d have a content, comfortable life, never bothering to push for more or ask for his activities to be dialed back as long as Mother still beamed at him at every fencing or piano trophy with Father nodding along. He’d be too focused on those things to give them up.

He squeezes the brooch, bringing it to his heart. “I hope you’re still proud of me… and, if you’re still out there, I hope you won’t be upset that I’ve been happy...”

Smiling, the peacock feathers just seem to gleam and perk as if to say that she is, Adrien pockets it, whispering, “Thanks, Mom.”

Perhaps there’s a lot of things that would have been better for him, and maybe even not wearing the ring is one of them. Yet, bounding through the city and towards his room, Adrien can’t really come up with anything to regret. He wishes things still turned out differently, that Father didn’t pull so far back from him, but he likes this life. He wants this life.

“Claws in,” Adrien pulls out some cheese for Plagg before starting up his computer. He needs to check the LadyBlog, and he’ll grab some scratch paper to write down some of the things that happened this weekend. Once he gets to his hideout, hopefully tape or a folding trick will be enough to stuff it in his journals.

Plagg curls up on the desk, purring softly when Adrien idly scratches his ears as he skims, orders some more cheese, and then brings out his paper. Eventually, when he doesn’t want to write more because more would mean that the organization of his journal is at stake, Adrien switches over to his dream journal.

Thankfully, he didn’t have a nightmare this time. It’s perhaps one of his more vague dreams he’s had since writing them down. There’s a bitter irony in the realization that writing his dreams and nightmares makes them more vivid but needing to write it down before he obsessives over what he does remember.

Still, blob of… jello maybe? Sentient slime? It didn’t seem weird at the time, and his dream self just was a little rueful but accepting of it when it slung around his room making a mess and refused to come off his neck like the strangest scarf he’s ever worn.

The sun, just barely peaking through the horizon and giving Paris proper light, first snatches his attention towards the window when he gets up to stretch after texting Nino. Then it’s the tink tink tink on the glass, a speck of yellow on the other side.

“Plagg, wake up.” Adrien nudges him a little before going to the control panel to open the window back up. “We have company.”

Plagg opens one eye to glare at the window. “Yeah, yeah, let little miss honey in.”

Adrien keeps his hum internal, Plagg didn’t seem antagonistic against Pollen yesterday, and smiles when the bee comb seems to just fly into his hand. Pollen bursting out of bright yellow light once he hides the jewel in his hair.

“Pleased to meet you, my King.” Pollen dips in what may be the kwami equivalent of a courtesy.

“I do wish it was in better circumstances,” Smiling, Adrien walks over to the intercom. “Is there anything you would like to eat?”

Pollen perks up. “May I, by chance, have jam?”

Adrien begins to nod, and then gives a sheepish smile to Pollen. “That’s the stuff with the seeds in it, right?”

Pollen nods and gives a smooth smile back at him.

“Alright then,” Requesting it through the intercom, Adrien huffs at himself before extending a hand towards the kwami. “Oh, I’m sorry, I haven’t introduced myself, I’m Adrien.”

Somehow, even though Pollen’s smile remains perfectly polite, her eyes just a get a bit amused. “I’m aware, my King.”

“Ah…” Looking towards Plagg for some help, who actually, isn’t even looking at Pollen. Just curled up on his pillow and clearly not interested in talking. “Well, I know you probably want to talk with Plagg right now but I was wondering-”

Plagg snorts- “Not quite, Kit.”- at the same time Pollen hums- “We aren’t connected enough for that.”

Blinking, not getting any of it, Adrien turns towards Pollen. “Connected?”

“When you use a miraculous, your soul acts a bridge for our presence, and therefore our powers can blend with your soul to exit out your body and influence the world.” Pollen nods towards his ring. “However, the aspects of your soul we’re touching don’t blend.”

Humming, Adrien nods slowly. “Do you think I could blend the both of you together if-”

“It’s possible, Kit, but you’re going through a lot. Don’t push it.”

Pollen chuckles, and it sounds a little like buzzing. “Ladybug did tell me that you might try to experiment, but no. Please don’t attempt such a thing. Kwamis don’t naturally blend together and it could do havoc on your soul.”

“Alright then,” Making the mental note to never try that, Adrien glances towards his closet. Where a full body mirror waits inside. “So do you mind if I try out your transformation? We still have a bit until patrol if you’d rather eat first.”

“I’d be my honor for you to wield me.” Pollen floats next to him, cheerfully polite, whereas Adrien can tell Plagg’s exact mood (jealous and territorial and hating this) by the way he grumbles and flies alongside him towards the closet. “To transform, you only need to call to me and say ‘Buzz on’. To detransform, say ‘Buzz off’.”

Nodding, Adrien reaches for the power in the comb. Already, he knows that this power won’t crackle and snap out. The ring’s energy pounces out when he calls for it, always ready to spring forward and move swiftly. The first time he transformed, impulsively transforming without feeling it out first, the sheer power of it nearly overwhelmed him.

This miraculous, however, buzzes. The power isn’t any less intense, but it all won’t whip out. The power there it’s just, well, it’s like a beehive. It’s all there, and when called, it’ll come out in a swarm, not a pounce.

“Okay,” His hands clench, and Adrien forces his muscles to relax for this. “Pollen, buzz on!” 

The miraculous surges, and he can’t help gasp against the sensation of it prickling over him. He throws his arms out as the sizzle of it hits his shoulders, the crawl almost tickling and instinctively creating the urge to scratch it all off. Yet he just watches the black jacket flow down his limbs, yellow rings chasing it all the way down to his fingers.

He doubles over himself, a surge of nausea swelling up as the swarm from the miraculous trails down his legs. It’s… it’s so wrong. No, it’s not. That’s not quite it, but after months of knowing exactly what a miraculous power feels like, this is too close but too different. Like a favorite recipe made by someone new and it doesn’t matter if it’s fine because it’s just not right.

“Kit…” Plagg floats up to him. “You good?”

“Yeah… yeah, just…” Panting, Adrien straightens and tries to get used to the feeling. While transforming into Chat Noir never makes him feel particularly heavy, he at least feels like he has weight. If it wasn’t for the fact that Adrien knows that any miraculous increases strength, he’d almost think a strong breeze might be enough to send him flying.

Looking at his ring, Adrien frowns at it. Since yesterday, the tips of it have shifted to be sharper. The ones by his knuckle longer and curving over the circle while the other two jab up towards them. It’s a little concerning, not his biggest issue though, but it’s turned a strange darkish red color and the green symbol has appeared. It isn’t glowing, all faded, but it shouldn’t have changed at all when he hasn’t transformed with Plagg.

He turns his frown over at Plagg. “What’s with the ring?”

Plagg scowls over at the wall. “Exactly what Sugarcube fears. You’ve got some dormant destruction in you, it’s reacting with Pollen’s transformation.”

With a sharp sigh, already dreading patrols and the akumas this week when Chat Noir doesn’t make an appearance, Adrien shimmies around as if the suit isn’t skintight. At least he doesn’t look bad. He still carries the same general vibe as he does as Chat Noir, except now with yellow rings encasing him. Antenna sprout up from where his ears would be, the tips of his hair dyed black.

He doesn’t have the bell though, and his neck looks… weird with the flaring collar. It’s just a bell, he shouldn’t miss it, but he kinda liked it.

It does look awkward though, and maybe he shouldn’t be clinging to his image and the feeling of Chat Noir so much. Maybe that’s why this miraculous just feels so uncomfortable. He keeps comparing it to something that it can’t be. Control and destruction aren’t the same, so he shouldn’t treat them as such.

Yet, he would rather look comfortable and give Paris a familiar image. Closing his eyes, he focuses on the buzzing over his skin. Perhaps, since this is the embodiment of control, he can just give a firm command on what he wants. He can’t quite feel Pollen the way he’s grown to feel Plagg in his transformation, but hopefully this’ll still work.

It takes long enough that Plagg stops throwing in backhanded cheers and advice and leaves to go curl up somewhere in his room. Adrien wishes Plagg didn’t feel uncomfortable, but, well, this is a rather uncomfortable situation. Adrien can’t say he doesn’t wish that Pollen was just here for a social visit.

Slowly through, he shapes each part of his suit to resemble the one as Chat Noir. Which almost feels worse somehow, seeing his superhero self but so, so far from it too. And he can’t give himself the eyes or ears or tail. Just shrinking the antenna.

Yet, even if it is still just wrong, working the suit into an image he wants does make it feel more like his own. He’s familiar with it, and Adrien can move around without the urge to itch and scratch the feeling of the suit away.

“So,” Adrien spreads his hands out when he exits the closet. “Did I get close?”

Plagg flies around him, smirking at the end. “Sure, just don’t let people close enough to see those ridiculous ears of yours.”

Scowling back, Adrien swats at him. “Whatever, I bet I’d be cute if I committed to a bee. Though I’m pretty sure I can manipulate the glamor enough for people to still think I’m Chat Noir.” If he tried really hard and wanted to give himself a headache that is.

“Who wants cute anyway?” Plagg flies over to the tray left in his room, chomping down on some of the cheese. “Is cute gonna threaten an akuma?”

“Might drop their guard, but well… I don’t think I could pull it off. Or want to. Not long term anyway.” Because, ugh, he hates it when people talk down to him or brush him aside. If that happened as a superhero too, even if it was to Adrien’s advantage, he’d resent it.

Which, when he thinks about it, is stupid to think of the miraculous of subjection, of control, as cute.

Or maybe not. If cute and charming still convinces people to follow another’s will, then it would be the same as using fear to force people. As long as there is control, seen or hidden, hated or loved, it still falls under Pollen’s domain.

“Buzz off,” Adrien lifts his hands, catching the tired kwami. “Hey, sorry ‘bout that, should’ve given you a heads up at least, but I’ve got jam? With breads if you’d like.”

Pollen slowly blinks up at him, and Adrien wonders why she’s tired. Sure, he’s tired because messing with the transformation just grates on him. But he didn’t use one of her powers. Hopefully, bribes of food and cat naps work the same wonders on Pollen as it does on Plagg.

“I appreciate it,” She bows slightly before flying over to the plate and licks the jam with a long tongue. She leaves the bread though, and Adrien’s definitely just going to toss it once she’s done.

In fact, he just opens the small jar of jam and scoops some out for her.

She smiles up at him, “My deepest thanks, my King.”

He smiles back, ignoring, for now, Plagg’s critical eye. He’ll have a chat with Plagg later. As much as Adrien wishes he didn’t need to transform with Pollen- still doesn’t think he needs to, but he refuses to be the cause of anymore stress for Ladybug- they still need to get through this with her. Adrien doesn’t want Plagg’s bad mood to rub off on him.

Gobbling down breakfast, working on the suit ate up more time than he thought and he needs to get across town to their meet up. Usually, as Chat Noir, he’d be comfortable that he could make it in three minutes, maybe less. Now, with him going to need to try and stay seen enough that people still think Chat Noir is around but not enough to see that there’s something wrong with him, he needs to give himself ample time.

Adrien glances to see if Pollen’s done, quickly looking back towards his desk to gather all of his notes and other stuff he’s bringing down to his hideout. He’s got his notes covered from Pollen, but he remembers wanting to try to make a type of bathroom which will require some garbage bag, more air fresheners and sprays, toilet paper, soap, more water. Everything that he thinks he needs.

And if all these things were mostly organized to begin with, that Adrien could have kept his attention on Pollen so they could leave the moment they could, then, well, no one needs to know that he thinks that her tongue looks really, really strange.

“Okay Pollen,” Glancing back, his shoulders relax when she’s simply lounging now. “Ready to go?”

“I am at your command.”

“Pollen,” Adrien takes a deep breath, “Buzz on!”

The transformation swarms him, buzzing over his skin, and he’s relieved to see that his changes stayed. It’s still him. He’s still the same superhero… just with different tools now.

“Okay, okay,” Adrien grabs the stringer at his waist, staring at it. “It’s just like the baton, right?”

Plagg snorts, “You tell yourself that.”

“Well, Ladybug’s slides- slides opens t-too-” Grunting, Adrien tries to force it open. To which the ringed weapon refuses to do.

Huffing, because even if he can feel time tick-tick-ticking away, he really wants to go to his hideout today. And if he needs to stay transformed as Pollen, that means this stinger needs to open up so he can put everything inside it. Which, even if this miraculous doesn’t feel as natural as Plagg’s, he should still know how to do this after being a miraculous wielder for months now.

“Ah!” Startling at how the top comes up, Adrien grins at Plagg. “Got it!”

“Oh,” Plagg rolls his eyes, “I’m so proud.”

“Yeah, yeah, okay, so… pocket, activate the pocket… there we go!” Shoveling all his stuff into the stinger, Adrien pops it shut and beams at Plagg. “Okay! Ready to go!”

Plagg eyes him up and down, “You sure about that, Kit?”

Wilting a little bit, Adrien opens the stinger again and opens the user manual. Sure, it’s not incredibly helpful other than explaining the powers. And it only explained cataclysm. Sort of. It mentions how his focus can shape what and what doesn’t get destroyed, but it mostly just says whatever he touches will be cataclysmed. Which is just false. There’s more nuance than that.

So… he’s going to hold the writer of these things in a healthy dose of skepticism.

The descriptions of venom and alleviate are written in depth about different intents of venom can cause those subjected to it. The easiest is to simply make the other stop, but with enough practice it may be possible to compel others. Alleviate can be used to give back control to others, whether it be from venom, pain- with a note that the cause of the pain doesn’t go away, only the sensation- or a paralyzing emotion, or from another magic source.

And, even though it’s highly likely that the bee miraculous as hidden powers like his, Adrien can’t deny that he’s a little peeved at how much more meticulous the descriptions are. Maybe Plagg’s past holders were just a little sloppy.

Adrien gets a little more tense when he realizes this would have been perfect against Puppettear. She Ladybug should have called someone- anyone- during that. Or even use the bee herself if she had to.

Unless she didn’t read this, didn’t know, and then nearly-

None of these thoughts help him get to patrol on time so he needs to focus.

“Okay,” Looking over to the clock, and yeah, he’d be thinking about going even as Chat Noir now, Adrien gestures Plagg along. He doesn’t have time to read anything more in the stinger. “Let’s go.”

“Y’know,” Plagg lazily flies alongside him, going backwards with his little arms reclined behind his head as Adrien stumbles onto the roof. “I guess the good thing about this is I get to see you be like this.”

“Just what I needed, commentary.”

Taking a breath to stabilize him, jumping is a lot different with this miraculous, Adrien starts running over the roofs. He tries to stick to the shadows like he used to, to seek some comfort in the roofs that are now much more slick and tilted than he remembers. They don’t hug and shelter him as before, but they at least block the worst of the eyes below.

 Instinctively, Adrien crouches to grab the end of the roof. It’s the best way to tuck his feet under him to spring across the streets.

At least, that’s how it works when he’s using the cat miraculous.

The bee miraculous of course still gives him strength, likely less than the ring but Adrien intuitively knows he’s a little faster because of it, but it significantly reduces the weight he has. And Adrien can somewhat ignore the fact that his center of gravity is considerably and awkwardly higher than before and his arms feel more, well, human than normal when he’s transformed and therefore not as well equipped to sudden to take his weight like that. He can adjust to that.

He cannot ignore how freaking light he is.

Nor, unfortunately, can he ignore Plagg’s crackling when he absolutely goes flying over the city.

The arc of his jump is all off, he never wants to do these big arcs and instead just wants to leap more like an arrow, and the speed of which he’s falling- because this is definitely falling and not jumping- is nothing like his normal, and even faster than this, running speed.

Flailing a little bit, he can’t see where he’s going to land and doesn’t know how to best to arrange his limbs, Adrien stumbles into a run. Sheer speed keeping his balance, and he leaps- still trying to figure out how to scale his strength to weight- in a halfway tumble and just hoping at this point he’s going too fast for anyone to notice. Or at least notice his missing tail.

Plagg snickers next to him when his wild momentum has him flattening and skidding over a flat roof. “You realize you aren’t actually a cat, right?”

“Yeah,” Adrien groans up, taking a moment to lie there longer to try not to get nauseous. “Cats are better. I feel like I’m going to float away every time I jump. There’s- I just don’t have any weight!”

“Hey, look on the bright side,” Plagg punches his arm once Adrien gets up, “If you’re awful with anything other than the ring, Pigtails can’t just have you switch miraculouses every time she gets a little concerned.”

“I guess there’s that,” Adrien immediately leans into the shadows and stills when he spots Rena Rouge bounding through the city and towards the Eiffel Tower. “Could do without the embarrassment though.”

Especially after Nino proclaimed his trust and confidence in Chat Noir and Ladybug. Now he’s reduced to this fumbling hero who can barely travel the city.

“Like you wouldn’t do that anyway.”

Plagg only snickers more at the flat look Adrien shoots him.

Grabbing the stinger, Adrien supposes he can use this to swing the rest of the way to the tower. This should come much more naturally with the miraculous, rather than trying to move like he still has the cat miraculous. At least he doesn’t have experience with travelling like this, so he won’t have any instincts that’ll mess with it.

With practice, he won’t have to look for what to throw the stinger at. For now though, he doesn’t want to mess this up anymore. Just something close he can latch onto, yank himself to, and that should be enough momentum to get him to the tower.

“Kit, you’re overthinking this.”

“Well my last instincts just had me face plant.”

“Trial and error got you this far.” Plagg shrugs, “And you don’t really have another option right now.”

Adrien hates that Plagg’s right.

The stinger gives a little zing out towards the tower- Adrien also hates that his hearing didn’t get the boost it normally does, it seems his eyes and nose are mostly the same, but he relies on his hearing the most when he’s rushing into areas he can’t see well or to know what’s happening on the streets below him without leaving his shadows- and then Adrien’s flying forward.

“Ahh!” His hands jerk in front of him on instinct, since this feels way too much like getting thrown, but at least he’s heading towards the tower. Though he has changed his opinion about using the stinger to move around.

It’s so much easier with a baton. It shoots you, in a straight line in a very measurable way, rather than launching you out of control with only a prayer getting you to where you need to be.

He swings his feet forward when he gets close to platform, no longer trusting his arms to keep his balance and weight for that crucial second before he can get his feet under him, and plans to run forward with his momentum until he comes to a stop.

The moment his feet hit the ground, Adrien realizes that maybe he shouldn’t have been dismissive of the change to his center of gravity.

The front of him immediately flips over and sends him into the most awkward roll he’s ever had to do that doesn’t involve any akuma or a teammate. If only because he, again with his stupid instincts, tries to use his hands to kick into a front flip and land on his feet.

But his arms aren’t quite structured the way they need to be for what he’s trying to do, even if he knows a normal human can do this so he should be able to with a miraculous, and his not-quite-as-flexible spine is quite irked at the roll to begin with.

Eventually, tumbling to a stop, the world stops moving enough for him to hear Plagg’s crackling once again.

“Okay,” Muttering darkly, Adrien gets his hands underneath him to push himself to glare at his friend. His annoying friend taking advantage of his very confused instincts. “You try going from an animal that always lands on its feet to this. Are insects’ legs even really legs?” Stretching his back, which pops irritably at him, Adrien swats at the tiny terror still laughing at him. “And without a tail! How am I supposed to keep balance without a tail!”

“Chat Noir?” Rena questions, with her famous questioning eyebrow already stretching the mask. “Umm… you good?”

Carapace crosses his arms and huffs, fingers fidgeting in that adorable Nino way he does. “Obviously not, he doesn’t have a tail. Or, uh, his… ears?”

“This is what I was waiting for, although uh,” Ladybug looks back at him, “You do look a lot like your normal self.”

He pouts at her, “Come on, I’m not giving up what I look like too! Besides, this way maybe we won’t tip off our little Moth until later.”

Rena gasps, the second eyebrow going up in a the ‘I’ve found my answer’ sorta way. “You’re using the bee miraculous.”

“What?” Carapace skims over him, eyes landing on the stinger at his waist. “But you-”

“With the glamor and my suit as close to projecting ‘Chat Noir’ vibes as possible, I’m hoping to keep everyone fooled that I’m not using my ring.” And then Adrien puts his hands on his hips, suddenly nervous that Ladybug might want to take it. Depending on what Tikki told her last night. Maybe he should have taken it off just to avoid the risk altogether.

Carapace looks rapidly between Ladybug and him. “But why bother with it? You have the ring. THE ring. Which you know better and are great at it, why switch to something new?”

“Look,” Ladybug puts a hand on Carapace’s shoulder and smiles at him, “I know it might not seem smart, but you’re both aware of the akuma yesterday. Yes?”

Rena’s eyes squint with her frown, flickering between the both of them as she gives a short nod. Nino nods slowly at her. Since, obviously, he knows. Ladybug knows who he is and could probably take a guess to how that affected him.

At least, with how fast he goes through the air, he should be able to reach anyone before they hit the ground.

“Yeah,” Carapace glances over at Adrien again, “So, no offense or anything, but that only makes it not as smart.”

“Seconded. If something like yesterday happened and Chat’s using the bee-” Rena’s lips tighten, fists clenching- “Absolutely not. We can’t have that. And the restoration won’t work without him and this just isn’t smart.”

“Well-” Adrien blurts, anything to dispel this rising tension between them- “Truth bee told-” His grin grows, tinged desperately, and while no one really laughs or smiles the air does seem to relax- “uh, we kinda wanted to talk to you guys about making the city safer.”

Carapace and Rena Rouge glance at each other, both making a shrugging motion, before turning towards Ladybug for further explanation.

“How would you guys like the chance to be permanent miraculous holders?” Ladybug gives them both her brightest grin, her entire face lighting up, so maybe last night she must have come to think this is a good thing. It’s the safest for the city, and it’s the safest for them too.

Rena lets out a squeal that makes Adrien glad not to have his normal ears. “YES! YES YES YES! I WOULD LOVE IT SO MUCH! SO MUCH! I WILL NOT DISAPPOINT I SWEAR-”

“Hold it-” Adrien lifts up his hands- “That was not a yes or no to becoming such. That was just to judge your feelings, because, well, there’s a world of difference between being a temporary hero and a full time.”

Carapace leans forward, “What do you mean?”

“It will bleed into every other part of your life with unexpected consequences.” Ladybug shifts, settling into the seriousness this demands. “With more of us and with time, we might become better coordinated and communicate so we can put our civilian lives first. But that will be rare. At any point of any day, you will be expected to confront an akuma.”

Adrien continues for her, trying to spare her from the memories darkening her eyes. “And sure, that sounds normal so far because we do call you unexpectedly. But now you’ll only have minutes, less than that, to get away, maybe even before an akuma alert if you think something’s happening. You’ll have to lie to everyone, flat out ditch classes or events if it ends up being a long one, and there could be certain side effects that will leave you… enhanced even when you’re not transformed.”

“Which I believe can be avoided, but it would mean you’d flatline as a hero.” Ladybug interjects. “We are of course comfortable with whatever choice you make.”

“But it will be an informed choice.” Adrien gives Rena a particular look at that. “Plus, you’ll have to care for your kwami, who will be with you all the time.”

Plagg grunts, “I think you mean it’s us you has to put up with you.”

“Plagg,” Adrien sighs, “You’ve already admitted that I’ve bought your love in cheese, you can stop saying that now.”

Ladybug giggles, “Don’t worry, I’ve met your kwamis and what Tikki says, they aren’t such cheese gremlins like Plagg.”

“Hey! Plagg is the best! You’d all be lucky to have Plagg!” Adrien headbutts with Plagg. The best kwami. What other kwami could teach him the glory that is cat naps?

“Yeah, you aren’t biased in that, are you kitty?”

“It’s just a fact that cats are the best.”

“Anyway,” Rena interrupts, “So, how’s this going to work? We mediate or whatever? Go through a test? What do we have to do?”

Adrien hums, taking in her locked jaw and determined gaze. There’s still excitement, but she’s more… resolute about this than what he expected. He figured Nino would be like this, nervous but tempted due to everything that happened yesterday. Though maybe Rena’s also reacting to yesterday, realizing what Hawk Moth is doing, willing to give more of herself up so it doesn’t happen.

Adrien smiles, Rena’s a good hero.

“We’ll give you a test run. A week.” Ladybug explains, “If you’re still willing to choose to wield the miraculous fully, we’ll go from there and explain more of the subtle details.”

“But honestly,” Adrien adds as Nino begins to frown, “None of those details are that big compared to adjusting with the miraculous as a civilian. But if you’re showing up all the time, Ladybug and I have methods for dealing with people and patrols and standard attacks against akumas if we don’t need to come up with an involved plan.”

“Speaking of…” Rena leans in, “You guys are going to give a statement? We’re having a Ladybug and Chat Noir interview!”

Adrien stiffens at that. “I want no part of that.”

Interviews are the worst. The pressure on all sides. Every tick and stutter recorded down and analyzed. Every fumble a mark of shame. You have to sound smooth and polished, but if you sound cryptic then they just ask more questions or assume you’re hiding. They’re trying to shape you into something that they want, and they’ll criticize you for just trying to be yourself.

Rena sits up, “People have a right to know-”

“We’ve told them everything they need to know.” Adrien snaps back, wincing the next moment because he’s never realized that he instinctively draws on power from the ring but he can’t and his whole body buzzes.

“Chat,” Ladybug sighs, sounding resigned which is nice but he still doesn’t want to. “It’s different. With Copycat and Dark Cupid and Puppettear and now yesterday, we can’t look like a threat to the world.”

“But isn’t that different?” Nino throws out, stiff as he scratches at his googles. “It’s all still Hawk Moth.”

“But it’s our face,” Adrien mutters, because he does understand he just hates it. “Something to see and hate. The only thing people have to associate with Hawk Moth is a purple butterfly. Or an akuma that will never come again. Or Mr. Pigeon. None of those can inspire fear like…”

“They’re idiots Kit,” Plagg butts his head against his cheek, and Adrien scratches his ears. “Anyone that knows you knows you’re the runniest cheese that exists.”

Ladybug lightly punches his arm, “Yes, the little kitty with a bell is terrifying.”

It’s hard to see the bell when he’s screaming and the ground is shaking, so his smile is a little forced but he does appreciate the sentiment.

“And,” Rena swallows, “Truth is how you get rid of that. No one really knows why you reacted like that so they’re all coming to their own conclusions-”

“I-” Nino snaps, then his fists ball up with a deep breath. “I think it’s pretty clear with yesterday. And Puppettear. And Dark Cupid. And so maybe Copy Cat was a little aggressive but who fucking cares? It’s still all Hawk Moth doing all of this! Isn’t that obvious?”

“You would think,” Ladybug starts, “But the anti-hero groups are gaining traction and if there are laws or public resentment then the akumas and Hawk Moth… it won’t be good. So should make an official statement.”

“With who though? And where? And when?” Each question can subtly favor a network, make implications further than simply trying to get work done depending on their political stances and what they typically report. Adrien groans at the anxiety already rising up at it, “This is going to be such a nightmare.”

“Yeah,” Ladybug sighs, “But it’s clear that we can’t keep dodging this.”

“Well,” Rena clears her throat, “You should address the big things that people are thinking about. Why you can’t hand your miraculous over to the police or government or something. Who you are. Just be… personable, not a threat. Make it so everyone knows that it’s Hawk Moth that’s the bad guy again and not…”

She trails off, clearing her throat again.

“They’re idiots for needing that at all.” Carapace states, shooting a grin at Chat. “You’re the best.”

Adrien grins and wishes he can just scoop him up in the biggest hug.

“Anyway,” Rena continues. “Just, mention your life. But say how this is your priority so no one thinks this is some part time gig for you and don’t really care. They just want to be reassured.”

Adrien snorts, “Sure, because going through things like that is a part-time job. My real job is easier.”

Ladybug frowns, “I thought you went to school.”

“Family company sorta thing. I help, uh, manage it.” Adrien waves that aside, “Anyway, isn’t it dangerous to show that our hand can be forced? If we respond to this after being silent, it’s only going to prove that we’ll respond to similar things, and we’ll get trapped in a net.”

“Counter point,” Nino lifts a finger, the other rubbing his chin. “We don’t need to show that this is responding to that. Make that a side thing or whatever, and use yesterday as an excuse. It’s not like that situation can be replicated, and even if it was, then it would be addressed by this.”

Rena chuckles and punches Carapace in the arm, “Oh ho, guess this turtle doesn’t spend all his time stuck in a shell.”

Nino straightens, “I have friends who deal with this kind of thing.”

“Oh, even further out of your shell. I’m so proud!”

Glaring at Rena, she shouldn’t talk to Nino, who’s her teammate, like that. Maybe-

“Ow!” Jerking his hand, stinging suddenly through the suit, he lifts it and groans at the crack of green lightning on his finger slowing fading away. He stares at it, frowning as the crackle shoved the buzzing away. The glove doesn’t look that different with how he changed the suit, but he can feel Plagg’s influence there.

Plagg stares at it too, fainter once again, and the hand crackles green as it retreats into the ring. The yellow buzz overtaking his hand again.

Then Adrien glances up to his three teammates staring at him.

“Damn,” Adrien sighs loudly and rubs his eyes, “You win the bet, Plagg.”

His friend immediately perks up and squints, “What do I win?”

Ignoring him and instead addressing the confused looks around him, Adrien shrugs. “I said that while the bee miraculous feels weird, I’m perfectly fine with it. Plagg said that it’d still conflict with my nature and I would instinctively lash out at with the ring as long as I was in touch with another miraculous’s powers.”

They all nod along to it, and, at least, the distraction was enough to get Rena Rouge to stop messing with Carapace. Nino doesn’t deserve that. Especially after yesterday. No one should be messing with him.

Adrien makes the mental note to also Plagg extra cheese or something for using him as an excuse. But at least they all bought the lie.

“Anyway,” Ladybug claps her hands together, “That’ll be the goal then. I’m thinking we’ll do it sooner rather than later, next week or so. We’ll first address why you showed up as the bee holder once word about that spreads and then prove your back. Any questions about you getting hurt should be met with this being an opportunity to improve and being more flexible rather than trying to simply use more destruction.”

Rena nods along, “Which we could use to quell any lingering fears around what happened with Copycat.”

Adrien growls on instinct at the thought of that no good akuma.

“And that,” Rena points at him, “Is things we need to avoid.”

“He was the worst,” He spats it out, crossing his arms at her. “A fake and a thief and a liar. It’s not like I hurt the victim either. I’m not apologizing for it.” 

He expects the sting this time, the crackling and buzzing fighting, so he doesn’t bring attention to it.

Carapace glances down, “Let’s just have Ladybug handle that. Just say that your powers will never hurt an innocent. Easy.”

Adrien gives him a smile and nods, “Okay, yeah, I can do that.”

“Alright,” Ladybug nods, “I’ll talk with Chat more on the details about the extent we’re willing to explain about the miraculous and information about Hawk Moth, doing our best to quell the anti-hero movement.” She gives him a look, and with his reluctant nod, she smiles. “Okay then, I think we’re good to get on with the rest of our patrol then. Unless you guys have other questions?”

“Just…” Nino swallows and looks over to him for a spilt moment, “One last question.”

Ladybug nods.

“Do you… do you guys choose this?”

Ladybug stares at him. Blinking.

“Yes.” Adrien smiles, really smiles despite how tragic the conversation went there at the end. “Sure, in the beginning, no clue what I was doing or what would happen. But I choose it everyday. I’ll choose when my body begs me to stop and I’ll choose it even when Hawk Moth’s defeated. I- even if giving up the ring meant I didn’t have to give up Plagg, I want this. Nothing makes me feel as alive and fulfilled.”

“I want Hawk Moth defeated.” She lifts her head up and pushes her shoulders back, “I want Nooroo to be able to go back to his family. I’m willing to fight for that, and I enjoy being Ladybug and I adore Tikki. This… I want to do this, I would have wanted to despite what I know now. Though I think I will want to retire once I see it through.”

Nino looks at him for a long, long second as Rena nods and tells Ladybug that she’ll take this seriously. Then his eyes drop as he slowly nods, face tightening with something that Adrien can’t see.

“Alright, my question then.” Rena looks down to his hand, to the ring. “Chat’s still going to wear the ring right? Like, if there’s an emergency, he’ll be there.”

“Of course.” Adrien says as Ladybug opens her mouth. “I’ll always be here.”

He looks over to Plagg after, grinning, and there’s something soft relaxing in his chest as Plagg grins back at him. He’s here, Plagg’s here. They’re staying together. Nothing’s changing that.

“Well,” Ladybug stands after there’s a few more seconds of silence. “I guess it’s time to patrol then.”

Rena grins and elbows Carapace. “Hey, looks like you won’t be the slowest this time.”

“Excuse you,” Adrien shimmies in the buzzing suit. “I think I’m more familiar with this now. Maybe not with the yoyo, but I could still win just running.”

Rena smiles, fangs- Adrien runs his tongue over his teeth and smothers the urge to frown at how flat they are- gleaming at him. “Then let’s race. First to Norte Dame!”

Adrien explodes, using how light he feels to fling himself through the air. He hopes, since he already feels so tired, that patrol doesn’t last long. He needs to get to the sewers and into his hideout and get all of this out. Before anything new springs up at him.

Maybe it’s a good thing that he’s grounded, actually. He might have actually collapsed if Father had anything planned for today.

Chapter 8: Guitar Villain

“Pollen, buzz off.” He mutters it into the pillows, counting a couple of seconds for her to materialize. “There’s some jams on the table. Let me know if you need anything else.”

“My… my King, I am worried for your health-”

“Look,” He hoists himself up, hating that he has to smile and lie to her. That he can’t let her know how he’s studying the change of the ring and how that works with the runes he can make and quick sections about what happened and his powers. Because if Ladybug ever finds out…

“I’m sorry about how long you were transformed, I passed out without saying the words. And, if it’s not urgent, can I just go back to sleep?”

Pollen smiles and bows slightly, “As you wish, my King.”

He smiles back, and then flops back down into the bed. Curling up around Plagg, and finally, finally going to sleep. Such precious, wonderful, sleep.

A sharp ringing interrupts such amazing sleep, and Adrien fishes around for his phone with a glare. Was he able to even sleep a wink?

He smiles and answers the call, “Hey Nino,”

“Dude, hey, man, your old man keeping ya busy?”

“Whadda mean?” Adrien pulls the phone back and hums at the sight of some missed messages and the time. “No, sorry, I was asleep.”

And now it’s night. He hopes Pollen’s night vision is as good as Plagg’s. Bees have a huge range of vision, do they not? Ugh… he’ll try to get some more sleep before he handles that though.

“Dude, it’s not even 8.”

“I had a day.”

“Oh, uh, wanna talk about it?”

Humming, since Adrien knows for a fact that Nino had a massive day as well, more so than him, and he doesn’t particularly want to have to lie to Nino. “My day was… normal, I guess, just more than I think I could handle. But what about you? You feeling good?”

“Oh, yeah, yeah. I am, I just, uh…” Nino mumbles, “No, I can’t ask. He just said he’s tired.”

Frowning, is Nino talking to Noel about this? Oh, wait, yes, Wayzz. Adrien’s hearing must still be sharp then. He really hopes he doesn’t lose any of it. He can’t remember what it was like to have it less than this.

“Nino…” Swallowing, Adrien wishes he could do something to help him without revealing everything. “You- I know may not get the details, and I’m sorry if I can’t be there, but if you’re going through something, I want to help.”

After all, Nino has been a big help to Adrien by simply being there for Adrien to talk to even before Carapace. Plagg may be fine of superheroes knowing each other identities, Ladybug still isn’t. Adrien isn’t sure on his feelings at the moment either, just that he’s unwilling to make their relationship worse by bringing in something so huge even if it does kinda feel like a betrayal. And now there’s Wayzz, who as the embodiment of protection may feel that these secrets are necessary for their safety.

“Adrien…”

“I care about you.” His tone, sharper than he meant, has his own eyes blinking in surprise up at the ceiling. “Nino, okay, I know I’m busy. But you need to know that all takes a backseat if there’s something going on with you. You’re… I’d do anything.”

Adrien slides his thumb over his ring. Plagg rumbles from where he’s curled up on Adrien’s stomach. It’s not his power, it’s Plagg’s, even if he can’t do anything with it on his own in the real world. And Adrien’s the same way. He can’t do much of anything on his own in the real world either.

He curls his hand into a fist, his thumb pressing onto the ring. He needs Plagg to be here, and Adrien’s so grateful that Plagg wants to stay. If something happens with Nino again… he needs it.

And, after what happened on the tower and his strange silence afterwards, Plagg needs him to be there too. Adrien isn’t going to lock him in the ring.

Nino… Plagg… Ladybug, they all need him. If he needs to keep a few secrets and work a bit harder to keep everyone together and happy, then he can do that. Even when Hawk Moth inevitably sends out an akuma this week, he’ll fight through this. For them.

“That means a lot, it’s just…” Nino sighs, “I got an offer today, and it’s, uh, incredible and means a lot but I don’t think I can…”

And Adrien can keep Nino’s secret as well.

“Dude, did someone offer you a job?” His smile twists, forcing the cheerful lie out. “Okay, I know yesterday was awful and everything, but I told you that you killed it! It’s obvious how talented you are.”

“Y-Yeah, they- they did but it isn’t… it’s not part-time. And I’m not sure if I can handle it. I’m just-”

“The greatest ever.” Okay, okay, out of lying territory now. Great. “You were probably first stood out due to your talent, but I highly doubt you would have gotten chosen for the job if you didn’t prove you’re more than that. Anyone who spends just a little time looking at you knows how dependable and dedicated you are.”

Nino scoffs, “Dude, seriously, we haven’t even graduated. How could I prove that?”

“But that’s just who you are, and I- I think you’re amazing for it. Besides, they’ll have to train you anyway. They’re expecting someone to train based on your experience.”

“I guess you’re right…”

“Always! But you have time to think it over, right? Even if you decide to say no, it’s not like the end of the world. I’ll always be there for you for whatever you decide to do with your life.”

“Wow,” Nino huffs, “I think, geez, what happened to the awkward, fumbling baby duck I met on the first day of school? When did you get this good with words?”

Chuckling, Adrien smiles into the pillow. “It’s just the truth, Nino, it’s not that hard to say.”

“Yeah, sure, like you aren’t biased at all in that.”

“Oh, I am, but I would like to mention, if you weren’t who you were, we’d never even get to the point where I’d be telling you this.” Adrien now smirks into the pillow, “Ha, try and counter that.”

Nino chuckles, “Anyone ever tell you that you can be surprisingly petty?”

“People tell me I’m charming.”

“Pssh, sure, dude, and uh, thanks, for everything, I think I need to think about this some more, but, uh, yeah, thanks.”

He’s yawning before he can even consciously think to himself that the conversation is coming to a close. “Cool, Imma take a nap.”

“Dude, weren’t you just asleep?”

“Your point?”

“You’ll be awake super early!”

Adrien huffs, “There’s a reason, my late-night owl of a boyfriend, that one of us is awake in the morning.”

“Oh shove off,” Nino huffs, “And, uh, sleep well.”

“Thanks, good night.”

Ending the call, Adrien snuggles up back into his pillow and cups a hand around Plagg, almost immediately falling back asleep.

 

“Good morning, Adrien, I’ve prepared and sent you your schedule,” Nathalie stares at his coffee tumbler and then him for a long moment when she looks up. “Are you unwell?”

It’s amazing, Adrien decides, what not enough sleep does.

Sure, he practiced with Pollen early this morning- finally getting the hang of moving around and his new sense of weight- but he came back to take a nap. He did the math, he slept for a total of 11 hours this past day, and he feels so, so incredibly tired still.

He heard somewhere that too much sleep can also be bad for him, but it’s not like he sleep it all in one long burst! He just kept feeling tired, so what else is he supposed to do?

“I’m fine Nathalie, just had a rough night.” After all, it’s childish to mention something as trivial as nightmares. “Is there any changes that I need to be aware of?”

Nathalie looks at for another long moment before shaking her head, “There’s a photoshoot after your fencing, you will be going straight there afterwards.”

“When am I expected to return?”

“Around 8.”

Nodding, keeping his sighs to himself, Adrien smiles and walks past her. “Thank you, I’ll see you later then.”

“Is there anything you like to request for the day?”

Oof, he must look pretty messed up if that’s happening.

“No thank you,” He opens the door, “But I’ll text you if that’s to change.”

“Thank you, enjoy your day, Adrien.”

Adrien trudges the rest of the war to the car, greets his bodyguard, and promptly passes out. Just looking at the seat made him feel tired, he’s way too condition to sleep here now. And Adrien has no regrets about it.

“My King,” Pollen shakes him gently, “We have arrived at your destination.”

“Thanks Pollen,” He mutters before smiling up at his bodyguard, “Thanks man, I’ll see you later.”

With a grunt, his bodyguard wishes him a good day at school with a thumbs up before Adrien leaves and the limo pulls away.

“My King, may I inquire about your sleep schedule? It does not seem healthy compared to the other holders I have had.”

Adrien takes a sip from his coffee, ugh cold, before offering some more for Pollen to take a sip. Who makes the nastiest face that Adrien chuckles at. “Don’t worry. It’s likely just a reaction to your miraculous, human bodies may be adaptable, but not that adaptable.”

Pollen nods at this, even though Plagg scoffs at his place in his hair, and Adrien takes a deep breath before heading up the stairs. It’s just Monday. And it’s just school. It’s not like it’s that big of a deal. He can get through this.

“Adrien!” Rose, towing a Juleka with her, skips up to him, “You look like you need some cheering up!”

“Thank you ladies, but I-”

Juleka lifts her eye up for a moment before muttering to the ground. “It’s about what happened to Nino, isn’t it?”

“Aw, you don’t need worry about that!” Rose wraps herself around one of his arms and leans into his shoulder. “Don’t grow apart just because of a what if, be happy that you have today for each and every day is a gift!”

Rose beams up at him, but he doesn’t miss how Juleka looks away and chews at her lip. It’s a nervous gesture that Adrien didn’t even see to this extent during picture day. Looking back at Rose smiling up at him, he gives a small one back.

It’s more difficult than he’d like to admit. He’s tired and there’s… Rose is wrapped around his left arm but its his right hand that’s tingling oddly.

“That’s beautiful, and I think I’ll do my best to follow it. Especially since I couldn’t have a better idol.” Adrien grabs one of her hands, reaching out to her with his ring, squeezing gently despite how the tingles get worse.

Rose steps back and giggles. “Aww, you’re gonna make me blush!”

Adrien forces himself to look away, wondering how much it took for Rose to get to this point, how much strength to build in her flail frame. He’s not transformed, yet when he focuses and seeks it out, he can feel how fragile her life is right now.

Does she even know? She seems so happy. Or maybe all life feels this fragile, Nino’s certainly did.

“That’s because I do admire you,” Trying to keep these thoughts off his face, Adrien lifts his head to try and give her that happiness. “I wish I had your strength.”

After all, if Adrien thinks about this all too much, about what he’s plunging in with Nino despite all that he knows, about what could happen to him and Ladybug, about what the miraculous is doing and can do, about what extent Hawk Moth is willing to go, about what he must do as Adrien to finally see Father again… if Father even cares…

It’s difficult to keep the smile on his face.

“Adrien!” Nino bounds up to them, and Adrien relaxes a bit. At least this, this he can have. Maybe not forever, but, like Rose says, he’ll take it as a gift each day. “Dude! How come you still look exhausted?”

Nino slings an arm around him and shoots a finger gun with his free hand. “Morning you two, how’s it going?”

Pollen frowns at Nino, “This human is uncomfortably close without prompting or consent.”

Closing his eyes, Adrien takes a moment to breathe as the two respond. It’s just this week. He can get through this week. He got through fashion week. He’s gotten through so many bad weeks. And he’s already one day through. He can do this.

With open eyes, Adrien leans in a bit to show Pollen it’s fine. And tells himself that he should talk to her. None of these decisions were hers and she can’t change her entire dominion simply so Adrien would be more comfortable with her miraculous. Pollen doesn’t deserve any of this reluctance. If anything, Adrien should be happy that her miraculous is in use and she can see the world.

It’s just… he would be a lot happier if that person wasn’t him.

“Come on Sleepyhead,” Nino steers him away from the smiling girls, waving them goodbye, and towards the school. “I carried you through Friday, you gotta buck up yourself for today.”

“That’s what the coffee’s for.” Pulling back from Nino, his arm with the coffee is squished between their bodies, he takes another sip. Slightly cringing. Plagg’s stinky cheese is still worse, but how does anyone like black coffee? “I don’t know how I’m still tired, being grounded does wonders for resting.”

Nino smiles and rolls his eyes. “It’s like your body doesn’t know what to do with an off-day! One of these days, you gotta sneak out-” Adrien scoffs softly as he sips more coffee- “and I’ll show you a real day of slacking off.”

“Nino, I wasn’t awake an hour last time I was at your place.”

“Ooh,” Alya’s head pops between them- Nino jerking back as Adrien just swallows down more coffee for the needed caffeine- and grins at the both of them. “Do I sniff a scandal?”

Snorting, if only she knew that there’s currently three kwamis between him and Nino. Now that’s something that would make all the headlines. Especially given the reputation of their school with so many of them getting akumatized or put in danger.

“The only scandal I smell is the class president getting another tardy.” Adrien lifts an eyebrow at Alya. “Is Marinette going for a record?”

Alya rolls her eyes and straightens up between the two of them. “Don’t I know it. Girl lives not two minutes from school. Just, just how.”

Nino huffs and stuffs his hands into his pockets. “She’s probably trying to milk every second of sleep she can get.”

“She definitely keeps herself busy.” Alya leans up closer to him, and Pollen’s antenna’s quiver at her when Adrien instinctively shies away from a grin like that. Plus Alya must have gotten a new perfume or something because it’s so… heady. “So, Adrien, I was wondering-”

“How dare she?” Pollen bursts, making him flinch. “The audacity to intrude on one’s space and then to ask for a request on top of it? My King, please do not let such a slight go unpunished!”

“Um, I uh…” Swallowing, Adrien backs away and towards the bathrooms. “Ask me at class, I need to go to the restroom first.”

Plagg perks up at that, “There an akuma or something?”

“Pollen,” He hisses softly enough that no one else should be able to hear, “I can’t focus on you and other conversations at once. I know this isn’t what you’re used to, but please, try to be at least quieter about it.”

Waving good morning to Kim and Ivan as he walks past them, he enters into a stall and gently cups Pollen as she floats in front of him. “My King, I had to speak out though.”

“Alya means well, she can be a little pushy, but she knows to pull back if I show any discomfort. You’ll see, for the rest of the day she won’t do anything like that before.” He strokes the fluff around her neck- he learned that antenna are the irritable kind of sensitive- and pulls out a packet of jam for her to eat.

“My King,” Pollen squeezes all of it out, “You are much too kind.”

“Everyone needs some more kindness in their lives. Now, come on,” Adrien smiles at the kwami, “You get to experience the joys of school now.”

In his hair, Plagg snorts.

“Wait, I would have something to say.” Pollen rises up, gently taking his chin with her tiny arms to lift it up as well before hovering back. “I know that my miraculous does not resonate with you well and your body fights against my influence. As such, I would like to extend my deepest thanks towards you for being so understanding and tolerant of me. I do not wish to be a burden, I am here because of you and for you, and as such I simply wish to make your life better.”

Adrien smiles at her, “Thanks Pollen, and I’d like to apologize in advance if I ever ignore or be short with you. This is a lot more difficult than I imagined, and I’m scared what Hawk Moth will do once he learns. But never think that I wish you weren’t here. I have no regrets involving you.”

Pollen smiles at him, nuzzling his cheek before laying down on his shoulder. Flushing the toilet, simply for appearances sake, Adrien makes a quick stop at his locker afterwards to grab one of his snacks in there before heading up to the classroom with his steps lighter than before.

“I can’t believe we let that demon run wild through the streets.”

And then he stumbles, glancing at the group- Lila there with guys and girls that Nino always avoids and so he does too- and he can hear his name get thrown around. He can see the tense shoulders and frowning faces and drumming fingers and phones raised up to show others which confirms, yes, there’s a lot of people online that fear and hate him.

Then he pushes that out of his head. He has nothing to be ashamed of. He’s saving people. He’s helping this city. He wouldn’t want to change anything.

Besides, he has this week to worry about. Though, despite still being much too exhausted to feel excited about much, the little talk with Pollen has brightened him up. They’re working together to get through the week. If she’s helping out, then it might not be so bad.

“Hey,” Plopping down in his seat, Adrien turns up towards Alya. “So what did you want to ask me about?”

“Just wondering if you’re free tonight Sunshine,” Alya lifts an eyebrow at him.

“Ah, no. I’ll be busy until tonight, and I’m planning on using the rest of the evening to finish the history essay.”

Nino scoffs, “The one from last Thursday? Dude, you seriously need to learn how to chill. It’s not due ‘til next week.”

Shrugging, doing these assignments early is necessary either so he doesn’t get behind from akumas or an excellent distraction from his nightmares when he doesn’t want to go running into the city at night, Adrien pulls out his stuff and takes a drink of water.

“What about this weekend then? A bunch of us are gonna hang at Juleka’s place, and it is so cool, let me tell you, and it’d be amazing if you could come join.”

Adrien pictures himself on Saturday or Friday, at least four more days into this and Hawk Moth most certainly aware of his miraculous switch. Even in a good scenario of which he feels well rested and maybe even comfortable with the bee miraculous, he can’t imagine that he won’t be a nervous wreck with the interview happening soon. He still needs to talk to Ladybug on an official date.

He sends her a sheepish smile, “Raincheck?”

“Nope, I refuse to accept that until you at least try and look at your schedule.”

“Sorry Alya, I’ll be busy this week and I got grounded. I’m not even sure if I’ll be allowed to go to the Challenge again this week,” He gives a little helpless shrug at Nino. “Sorry man, I’ll definitely watch and call.”

“I’ll hold you to that, dude.”

“Ay, Nino!” Kim shoots fingers guns at him as he walks into the class, “Way to go man!”

Alix smirks at Nino. “Hey, at this rate, maybe you’ll end up topping XY on the number 1.”

“Har har.” Nino tucks his hat on tighter, “Thanks you guys, but it’s still somewhat early into the show. Let’s not go jinxing it.”

Adrien shrugs, “You say that, but you can’t jinx talent.”

“C’mon dude, stop.” Nino shoves at him, and the smile on Adrien’s face freezes slightly when he spots the new wrist band on Nino’s arm. If he didn’t know any better, if he wasn’t looking for it, the muted green bracelet with a hexagonal pattern would mean absolutely nothing to him.

“Anyway,” Kim rests his arm on Alix’s head only to get slapped at with a scowl. “Are you guys going to his concert tomorrow night?”

Alya scoffs from above, “Who has a concert on a Tuesday night?”

“It’s to lead up to the big one on Friday, duh.” Chloe huffs as she enters the room, Pollen perking up at his shoulder. “Since he rightfully claimed the number 1 spot.”

“Pssh,” Alix rolls her eyes, “Jagged Stone is better.”

“He’s still in the number 2 spot!” Sabrina chirps, “That’s still really good!”

Alix squints her eyes at the red head, muttering. “She being condensing or…”

“Anyway,” Loudly, maybe a bit too forceful for how Nino gives him a side eye, Adrien plasters a smile on for Kim. “Got grounded again.”

Kim looks at Nino.

“Oh, well, I dunno dude…”

“Nino’s obligated to keep me company and play video games with me.”

Since, if Adrien’s going to be lying to everyone, then he might as well use it for his friend as well. Nino shoots him a smile, one that twitches the next second.

“Ah, don’t worry Kim,” Lila comes in, and that smile of hers almost, almost makes his twitch. But he’s not easy to break even if his hand spasms when that potent smell of hers clogs his nose. “I’m free for most of the week, I might not be able to get a ticket…”

“Don’t worry Lila, that’s fine.” Kim waves that off, grinning all excited and follows her up to her desk. “’Ay, Alix, didn’t you say…”

Adrien forces the conversation out of his head. While he still doesn’t like her for everything she did a couple weeks ago, she’s backed off. She’ll make claims that she’s on friendly enough terms that Ladybug will stop and chat with her for a few minutes. And he hates how she’ll say the sweetest things with that smile and gobbles up the trust of his classmates.

She may not have done anything, but after seeing how she pushed at first, Adrien knows that this is tactical. Chloe knows it. It’s a manipulation technique they’ve seen too frequently with people trying to take control of their parents.

Marinette also doesn’t seem to like Lila, which is an interesting stance for someone so kind to take, but Adrien knows from firsthand experience that Marinette won’t trust without a reason. Maybe she just finds it unnerving how everyone else is so willing to give it.

But, as much as it feels like a betrayal to his classmates to not even try to confront Lila and just let her get away with this, it’s not like she’s doing any harm.

Besides, a classmate that might create drama is low on his priorities right now.

Marinette squeaks into class and slams her hands onto their desk. “Nino! Adrien! Hi! Just wanted to say good morning and I’m so sorry Nino but also really happy for you. Here’s to hoping only the good parts next time!”

Nino opens his mouth, but then, in a span of a blink, Marinette’s collapsing into her desk and Miss Bustier walks into class.

Well, at least school life isn’t all that different.

And now, watching Nino out of the corner of his eye for most of their classes, Adrien can be endlessly amused at how often Nino glances to the side, opens his mouth and almost says something, or how his hand twitches to go into the air.

None of it’s really obvious, and Adrien’s sure he was worse with Plagg all those months ago, but it’s still great.

Although, after glancing at Pollen who’s more occupied with observing Chloe, he does have to wonder what’s going through Wayzz’s head right now. When his holder, who is trying to work out if the stress of being a superhero is worth it, is unknowingly dating him, Adrien, who was the one to pull him out here as Chat Noir.

Plagg’s gonna find that funny too.

Speak of the devil, he flies out. It’s a little early for him, lunch isn’t until fifteen more minutes, and Adrien’s shoulders drop at that look in his eye. His phone must have lit up, as it is supposed to do with akuma alert. If the alarm’s not going off, then it must not be considered a threat to this area. It’s a good update for people who are trying to continue with their lives. But, as much as Adrien doesn’t want everyone’s life to be disturbed with each akuma, makes it so much harder for him to get away.

Glancing at Nino, who is still unaware, Adrien tries to think of some excuse.

“Kit, we got one.” Plagg looks to the bee comb hidden in his hair. “You think you’ll be good?”

Adrien gives the slightest nods before slipping his tablet into his bag and standing up. He’s got a decent enough excuse as a lie. Probably. He really hopes that Miss. Bustier doesn’t think lesser of him when he’s always trying to squeak out of class.

“Adrien,” She looks up with that small smile of hers and a raised eyebrow. “I don’t believe the bell as rung.”

“Apologies, but Nathalie buzzed me.” Lifting his wrist to show the bracelet (that can’t do this but she doesn’t need to know that). “I must be picked up immediately.”

“Oh, what’s the issue?”

He can’t really hesitate, so he pulls out his phone and quickly thinks of something. “Oh, it’s an akuma, it’s close to my house. So this is just a safety procedure. I’ll be back once Ladybug makes it safe again.”

Ivan huffs softly in the background, quiet even for him, with a mutter about something about Chat Noir.

Adrien pushes that out. It’s not important to anything. He can’t even hear what Ivan said.

Miss Bustier nods and gestures him towards the door. “Stay safe, Adrien.”

“Of course.”

It’s likely not quite superhero of him, not transforming the very second he gets, but Adrien slows a bit when he looks over to Nino as he leaves. Wide eyes flickering between him and empty air, and Adrien’s already reaching into his bag to text him a few messages. Hopefully Wayzz also tries to calm him down.

To get closer to the akuma. To the danger he’s saying he’s escaping.

Hm, yeah, he takes it back. Hopefully Wayzz doesn’t decide to lie like that to Nino. He does it enough.

“My King,” Pollen beams at him as he shoots off the last message in the shadows and praying that no one sees him jump out of here. “I must commend you. That was quite a tactful retreat.”

“Thanks Pollen,” He tries to smile at her, because she really is sweet and he likes her, but the dread clogging his stomach at fighting with the bee miraculous makes it a little difficult. “Let’s do this, buzz on!”

He trembles a bit through the transformation before shaking himself out of it and using the stinger to fly out into the city. He’s still faster as Chat Noir, maybe not if he’s trying to be 100% percent hidden at noon on a sunny day, but he’s grateful that he decided to practice early this morning. Falling on his face doesn’t make a good impression on the akuma.

Adrien swings in and kicks the dragon, knocking the akuma to the ground. Which, pulling back the stringer and doing a flip onto the ground, is a decent enough entrance. It’s harder to quip like this, having to focus on his body and how he moves, so it isn’t Chat Noir worthy. But, it’s fine. Akumas will fear him like this too.

Oh, shoot, he didn’t even think of a name.

“Chat Noir?” The akuma gets up, and Adrien internally deflates when he figures out the akuma. “Not Chat Noir. Who are you to interrupt my rock n’ roll?”

“An old fan of yours, and I’m just so crushed you don’t remember me after Pixelator.” He grins, crouching down. “I’m-”

The fire comes out of nowhere, and Adrien glares up at the dragon. Fang, probably. He should have been able to hear that. Stupid bee miraculous. The vision might be even better than a cat’s, but that’s not particularly helpful right now.

“Awesome solo!”

He can hear that though, and Adrien twists and leaps to dodge it. And dodge it. And quickly scamper out of the way when he fumbles with a landing.

So perhaps an hour or so of practice doesn’t erase months of battle-tried instincts with a different suit.

Grunting at the impact of the sound, and then at the wall, Adrien tries to keep his vision straight. He is still wearing the ring, he can transform into Chat Noir. But, unless his miraculous is about to get taken or someone’s about to get seriously hurt, he needs to hold out until someone else gets here. He’s not going to break Ladybug’s trust so quickly.

He flops down on the ground, thoughts stunned silent when his arms and legs barely even tense up when he tries to flip back up to his feet.

God, he’s so exhausted. And from one hit.

If only he was in better sync with the bee miraculous, then he would be able to get the strength to start fighting again. He wouldn’t even need to think about it.

“I don’t know who you are, but give me your miraculous and I’ll just let you be.”

Pulling on the bee miraculous, feeling ten times worse but at least his body twitches under his control, he jumps up and grabs his stinger.

“Of course you’ll let me bee. I’m the best bee.” He wraps his legs and arms around him, coiling him with his body as his muscles shriek with the effort.

“Hey, Kit, watch-”

“Venom!”

He only needed to move the stinger an inch, just an inch, and apparently that was enough time for Fang to grab him with his claws. Very, very sharp claws digging into his chest that very much so stab and hurt despite the suit.

“Ha, way to go Fang! Now how about you rock n’ roll to- ah! Fang!”

“Kit!”

Thrusting his stinger onto the dragon, they immediately start falling out of the sky. With Adrien frozen stuck in Fang’s claws, unable to get the claws to budge at all after using venom. Instead they just seem to slide in farther as he desperately tries to wiggle away-

Adrien gasps out when they land. His already loose hold on the extra strength from Pollen slipping through his fingers. His head blooms in a sudden and visceral headache, ears ringing and sight blurred from it. Not that his senses can give him much anyway. Trapped underneath a massive dragon with no hope of getting out of its claws, nevermind wiggling out from under it.

At least, with Fang frozen, he can’t get crushed. Just sitting here with his chest absolutely on fire and struggling to hold onto the buzzing trying to fly back up into the comb.

“Kit, Kit!” Plagg flies to him, those green eyes of his softly glowing. “You good?”

“Been better…” Adrien moans, dropping his stringer to grasp at his chest as he can pull those-

His hands meet something wet and warm, slowly trailing down between his fingers. So, uh, that would explain the pain.

“Why-” Gasping, trying not to push his chest out, he looks to Plagg- “It wasn’t that- taken harder hits-”

“I don’t know, I don’t know, but, uh, Pigtails and your boy just showed up. That fox can’t be far. It won’t be long now Kit, I swear. Just hold on.”

Nodding, since yeah, Adrien can do that. He just needs to keep existing until his teammates finish up. That’s fine. That sounds like a great plan. He can’t even mess it up. He just has to do nothing until then.

Do nothing but trying to breathe but not breathe because of the claws in his chest. Do nothing but try and hear the fight outside the frozen dragon cocoon he’s trapped in even though his headache drills his skull for his efforts. Do nothing but feel his pulse ache and throb through his entire back that’s stiff. Do nothing but wonder why his left elbow is slowly getting more and more painful, a bright flare in a body that’s already suffering. Do nothing but fight for the transformation despite wanting vomit and fight off the buzz.

At least he thinks it might be lunch. Plagg’s rambling about food and what they’ll eat after this- “Surely you can tough it out if there’s some amazing cheese on the other side, right Kit?”- and that’s nice. He’s going to be so hungry after this.

He’s always hungry as Chat Noir, but it was worse in the beginning and he wasn’t used to it and the akumas were easier to deal with. Sure, they hit hard then too, but Hawk Moth filled them up with too many emotions for them to ever have too many moving parts or complex plans.

Maybe… maybe he’ll take a nap first though. Everything really hurts, and he doesn’t really want to feel it, and he’s tired. Really tired. It’s all swelling up in him, and a nap can’t be bad.

“Kit!” Plagg slaps him, and that startles him into gasping- ow!- and to his kwami. “Stay awake!”

“Plagg… I…” Adrien tries to take a deep breath instead of just gasping, but that hurts and he can’t get himself to breathe anymore than this. “It really-”

Then a blessed pink light and ladybugs swarm him, his ears springing back to life to hear the ‘finally’ Plagg grumbles out. Which, as his body swells in relief, Adrien doesn’t even care. Just relishing in a nice, big deep breath.

He does, however, start caring when he hears the screams.

Grabbing his stinger, slick in his hands, he launches himself closer to Jagged Stone. Which, he doesn’t really know what to do because he can’t take away the pain when he isn’t Chat Noir but-

“Venom!” Praying that this works, Adrien hits Jagged with it and resists the urge to throw up as his whole body gets thrown through the ringer for that. The instructions said that a frozen victim of venom can’t move or feel until the alleviated or it wears off. And with the butterfly’s magic still bubbling off Jagged, it won’t hurt him.

Adrien holds his breath when the frothing bubbles dissipate. “Alleviate!”

Jagged Stone coughs for a moment, but he doesn’t look anywhere near as bad as Max was when he had to suffer with the magic peeling off him. This is good, this is fine. He can always get himself to pull out a venom and an alleviate for this. It’s all good.

He smiles towards the other three, Ladybug, Carapace, and Rena all wearing matching grins of relief, and lifts his fist. “Pound it!”

His left fist. His right got some blood on it and, even though he didn’t bleed enough to get on the sidewalk when he looks back, Ladybug’s going to be upset.

Unless, a quick look shows that his suit looks as black and dark as normal. Maybe not.

“Well, I do beelieve that went pretty well.”

Plagg scoffs, “Yeah, just don’t let Wayzz look too close.”

Stiffening immediately, because Adrien doesn’t get that but he trusts Plagg and it isn’t really a stretch for the kwami of protection to sniff out injuries. As the miraculous of protection, Adrien’s trying to think of what scraps he’s managed to pull from the book, it reacts more strongly with the holder’s emotions than the other miraculous they’re using. Which Adrien knows about- Nooroo’s might be the most intense which might be why there can be a clear range in power and strength in the akumas- and he needs to get out of here then.

It wouldn’t be a problem if Nino didn’t know Adrien. But Nino sits right next to him in class! Will Wayzz be able to see it with Nino’s attention on him? Will the glamor even work if Adrien’s not transformed?

Okay, he doesn’t really understand where his thoughts are going with that. So, shoving that out, Adrien will just concern himself with food and resting.

Still, watching Nino squint at him, his smile rapidly dissolving into a firm line, it’s kinda hard to keep all those thoughts down. But, no, no more. Adrien can’t deal with anything more.

He’ll look more into it soon- very soon- but just not now.

“Okay,” Banking on the hope that what Nino sees is confusing or he feels too awkward to call attention to it, Adrien grabs his stinger. “How about we then-”

“Excuse me, Ladybug!” Multiple reporters start clamoring towards them, and Adrien decides- as they all immediately flee away from the area- that perhaps the best way to keep Carapace oblivious to necessary and acceptable risks Chat Noir makes is those reporters.

“Pollen, buzz off…”

Adrien wobbles and leans against the wall of the school. He can’t be here long, leaned up in the shadows, and he needs to walk back into class now that he would have been sent back to school. Since-

Since…

Adrien tumbles, falls, a blur of sensation and limbs and movement that all means something but scatters apart in his mind. He lays there, burning but not, wanting to cry but not knowing why, fingers reaching but like a dream he can’t really feel the ground beneath him as he pushes against it.

It isn’t a dream though. He knows that. It… feels like that. He can’t get a grip and control anything around him, and he really can’t get himself to care about that. That there’s things, usually there are things that he cares about, but he can’t. He just can’t. It’s not here and he’s not thinking about it so he can’t really even remember what it is.

But he was doing something, if he can just focus, if he focuses then he can get up and maybe make himself feel better? He’s trying to do that, he knows right now he feels awful. His entire arm might be broken for how it screams but lays limp. The screams are thankfully far away, but it is something he should care about. It is something he feels now and can do something about. Yes, yes this is real and he needs to deal with it.

With one arm, Adrien pushes his upper body up as he shimmies his legs underneath to try and get up. His balance wobbles, his right arm tensing and hurting when he uses that to try and stabilize himself, and then Adrien doubles right back over the ground as his insides go up and in and his chest, throat, and mouth sizzle.

In that order, probably cause he just vomited all over his shoes. Which, ugh, those might be new. Father won’t be happy.

Which doesn’t matter right now because his arm hurts and his insides are getting fuzzy and strange and full so he doesn’t want to get up but his arm really does hurt and he thinks that he really should be doing something about that.

Maybe he should try to get up again. That’ll fix his arm.

But he doesn’t want to upset his stomach.

Perhaps he can do something that keeps his stomach down but the rest of him up. Hmmm… if he walks on his hands his stomach will be lower to the ground than what it would be if he got up on his legs.

Adrien starts to move then stops since his right arm can’t move and Adrien doesn’t think he can do a handstand with just his left arm. He’s done it on his right before and usually he can do things between his left and right pretty easily but his left arm is also a little fuzzy and numb and that just doesn’t seem good.

What was it that he wanted to do again? He wants to get rid of the pain in his right arm, but that’s now a pretty constant thing and the flippy-floppy thing his stomach is doing along with the stomping in his head and his eyes can’t focus which is really scary and he really doesn’t like that and he doesn’t understand why so he really needs to figure that out before it gets worse. Why is it getting worse?

Adrien moans, the sound skipping in his lungs and his heart that churn with air and blood laced with acid for how it stings and bristles against his insides. He moans, the sound sinking into his stomach where it is almost crushed but pushes back and thrashes against it. He moans, the sound bouncing between his ears and throws him back and forth until he can’t remember which way is down.

He pushes himself into the ground. It’s cold and hard but it doesn’t feel like down. He claws and tries to grab it as everything tilts and swirls and his stomach clings to itself to try and not get thrown out of a roller coaster he never wanted on.

He wants off it. He wants this to go away.

Why can’t it go away? He doesn’t understand where this is coming from and it hurts and he wants his Mom to come and soothe him but that can’t happen and he can’t do anything and just why? Just why can’t he do anything? Why did Mom have to go?

And now he can’t breathe very well and everything hurts and he curls up in a ball and hides his face and tells himself that’s why his vision is blurring between black and fuzzy light and why he can’t hear anything. That’s why it all hurts. Once he takes his head out and gets up then he’ll see and hear and fix his pain but it won’t go until that happens.

That’s why he’s so broken right now, he just isn’t getting up. He could fix it getting up.

Adrien curls up, tries to breathe so he can get up. But he can’t breathe and he can’t get up and he can’t be fixed so he’ll just lay here instead.

His body gets thicker, stuffed and numbed as it falls away from the ground that he’s trying to press into so he doesn’t fall away too. And he likes that, the not knowing, it feels better. It doesn’t hurt, which maybe means he’s fixed and can get up but he can’t feel it all to even get anything to move and everything’s a little weird and strange so he’ll just stay laying here until it’s fixed again and he can move.

Something buzzes in his ears, and he groans against it. The buzzing. The constant buzzing constantly creeping over his skin. It doesn’t hurt but he wishes he could claw it all off. The buzzing that poke and hover and never give him any rest and he wishes he had a biggest and heaviest blanket to swaddle himself and smother all the terrible buzzing and never gives them an opening.

“-ing!”

Adrien groans against the sound. That hurts and he doesn’t want more pain. He likes this not pain. He just wants to sit here and not feel anymore pain. That’s all.

But he can feel it, slowly working back into him. He doesn’t want it so maybe if he coils up a little tighter and goes back-

“Adrien!”

There’s worry in Pollen’s voice, and that gets him to move. He groans, since everything hurts and it’s all sharpening back up into vivid pain, but he doesn’t want Pollen to be in pain and worried too. He doesn’t understand why she’s reacting like this, though he can make a few guesses when he remembers what happened.

Adrien gasps, thoughts of school and Father and the akuma and using the bee miraculous come flooding back. How he managed to forget or think that they aren’t important doesn’t make any sense but he remembers now and he has to get up.

“Pollen, I-” He wheezes, his right arm throbs all the way down and his skin hisses in tight burns crackling everywhere. Dry but he can feel it’s wet too. “I’m sorry, we can talk after I get back to class. Shit, I don’t know how long it’s been…”

“My King,” Pollen pleads, voice low and honestly sounding just as awful as he is. “I… We have other priorities than school.”

Adrien agrees, but everything feels so swishy at the moment. But he knows that he needs to be at school to reassure everyone and be where Father expects him. Once he’s there maybe he can then figure out why he feels broken and crushed and still on the verge of throwing up. Or maybe he can just take as many painkillers as he can take that are in his bag.

But he has to. He can’t feel the importance of it, but he does have to.

“Let’s just get you and Plagg some food first then, huh?” Adrien tries to smile, his entire face stiff and the movement makes his headache worse.

Then he looks around for Plagg, who must be napping somewhere because Plagg always naps after difficult transformations but maybe he tried to find someplace else that’s calmer because Adrien doesn’t see him.

“No, you don’t understand.” Pollen then scowls deeply, and Adrien curls at the frustration there on her face when she’s normally so calm but of course he managed to do something wrong and upset her since he always manages to do something-

She jolts, reaches out with her little arms and pets his chin. “No, my King, I am not upset at you. It is impossible for you to understand much, the effect may be weakening, but it is still there.”

“Effect?” Adrien questions, since, sure, he’s always a little out of it after a tough fight like the one against… against whoever they fought but Pollen put that in such a weird way. If only he could have Plagg explain it. He’s so much more blunt about these things.

“Which, I apologize, must be heightened after your transformation with me. I tried my hardest, but your systems are still in shock.”

Adrien frowns, he transformed with Pollen? Why would he do that?

Besides, his arm hurts. It hurts even more than after yesterday which was awful. It hurts to the point where Adrien has it stuffed in its sleeve and cradled against his side and wants to keep it there forever to never use again because it hurts so much that he doesn’t think he can ever use it again.

Anyway, his arm only hurts with Plagg. Not Pollen. Though maybe that’s why this headache seems to be so much worse than anything he’s ever had before.

Pollen’s antenna twitch, “My King, Adrien, you need to go to a healer.”

“This stuff always goes away. In like a day. Plagg knows too and I think he can help but…” Adrien looks around again for him and shuffles further into the dark as people pass around him. He idly notes that he needs to hide his face. They might think he’s some kid on… whatever drug is most popular with the vomit around him and talking to the air, and he can’t have that image ever get around online.

“Oh, you haven’t realized yet, I… I am so sorry.”

“What?” Adrien huffs, sick and tired and put up with this confusing… everything. He liked it better when it was all foggy and simple. “What are you talking about?”

“You were hit with a power. Stupefy. The victim is unable to accurately perceive details around them, and especially not details in the past or future. It’s an ability of Gigga, the kwami of Ignorance.” Pollen glances to the side, her little arms rubbing together.

“That doesn’t make any sense.” Adrien sighs, rubs his temples that actually might make his headache worse. “I haven’t pulled out any other kwamis since you.”

“Not all of us are trapped, Gigga is one of the few out there.” Pollen explains, and Adrien supposes it is like how Hawk Moth has Nooroo. Which he can make sense of.

Adrien blinks when he realizes she’s stopped talking. She’s staring at him, then the ground, with her antenna trembling. She’s distressed, and Adrien reaches up- the muscles in his left arm ache but they can be moved, unlike with his right- to pet the soft fluff at her neck.

“Adrien…” Pollen pulls her big, otherworldly eyes to him, and with a shaking little arm she points to his arm stuck in his shirt. “They stole the ring. They took Plagg.”

Chapter 9: Prince of Destruction

“Plagg can’t be gone. It’s… he just can’t be.”

Sure, he isn’t responding right now but Plagg normally takes a nap and forgets about all the things Adrien has to do on a day-to-day basis like school and photoshoots and the like. He’s just doing that. Somewhere. Maybe away from the sidewalk. He doesn’t like crowds like this.

“I am so sorry, Adrien. I couldn’t do anything and…” Pollen shudders, “They hit right as you detransformed and I couldn’t even manage to follow them or see much, I am so sorry.”

“Hey, hey, it’s alright.” The words flow without thought, and Adrien cups her with his left hand. “Besides Plagg’s not gone, he’s…”

Adrien trails off when he looks at his right arm tucked to his body. It’s been wet, an annoying sensation but mostly ignorable compared to the deep pain resonating from it. But, his outfit, it was just this sweater. A nice crème sweater, of course. There wasn’t supposed to be any red involved in it.

Why? When did Adrien hurt his arm? He can’t remember.

“Shit,” Adrien can almost feel the answer in his head, he knows he knows it, but he can’t say when his focus is on the fact that maybe Plagg really is gone. Gone even though they just committed to one another. Gone even though they decided that they were going to pull each other through all the awful everything that the world’s throwing at them. That they’ll stick with each other.

Plagg wouldn’t leave him. He wouldn’t. Adrien- Plagg wouldn’t do that to him.

He runs towards a hidden alley, keeping his face tucked away. He almost trips every other step, his stomach hates him and the movement is wrong and flimsy and the ground keeps swaying, but he manages to get in there and hide.

Adrien thinks that Plagg would be awake by now. Telling him he’s being dramatic or why the heck he isn’t sleeping yet or anything else. His grumbly prickly concern that Adrien’s gotten used to these past months.

It doesn’t come, and Adrien feels horror prickling along his insides long before he lifts his arm from his side- gritting his teeth through the cramping shocks- and pulls the sleeve back.

The ring isn’t there. That bright shine amidst his black skin simply gone.

There is blood though, leaking from his arm as he peels the sleeve back farther up. Adrien can’t really tell where the bleeding is, everywhere for how wet and sticky his arm is, not when the skin is too dark to tell and his sight is still kinda fuzzy for that detail. At least his upper arm doesn’t feel like this, and the wet part only starts a little below his elbow.

He twitches his fingers and almost bites his tongue at the sharp stab of sheer pain shooting up.

“Shit,” Adrien swallows, “Shit he’s really gone.”

But that’s not quite right. Gone implies that Plagg can’t come back. He could, he can. But someone took him and is keeping him away. Someone did this. Plagg isn’t gone, he’s taken. Robbed. Stolen. As if he’s nothing more than an object to be passed around!

“We need to get him back.” The pain seems to be dwindling. It’s there, but his heart is pounding and the sickness in his stomach is rolling over with something new and all of that doesn’t matter because someone stole Plagg!

Oh god, oh god, what- what are they doing to him? Are they going to transform? Force him to do that? Oh, no, they, they can’t do that to him. Not to Plagg.

“My King,” Pollen starts, stops, starts up again. “You need to breathe.”

“I-” Adrien wheezes. Shit, when, when did he start hyperventilating? That’s not helpful. Hyperventilating isn’t going to get Plagg back. “I don’t know- I don’t- what- how… Plagg’s mine. I’m his. We, we’re not- we said we wouldn’t abandon each other, that we wouldn’t leave the other alone and now he’s gone and now- now what am I supposed to do?”

“You will breathe.” Pollen nods slowly at him. “And then we’re going to make a plan and get Plagg back.”

Adrien nods back, breathes. He can do that. Step 1) breathe. Step 2) figure out how to get Plagg back. Step 3) absolutely ruin everything that stands in the way of the plan. Since he said nothing would get him to give up Plagg and he is keeping that promise.

His hands curl into fists, his right clamping and burning distantly. Someone stole Plagg. His friend, the first one that got him out of that stupid cold big room, who stays with him and watches anime with him and makes funny cheesy jokes and is sarcastic and dry and is a big grump and defensive and hissy and they took him!

How fucking dare they!

Adrien inhales, it curls low in his body, where it stiffens and freezes and boils. It exhales as a low growl, a building rumble shaking his bones as he tries to grapple with what this thieving demon has done!

“I assure you, my King, we will not be letting this grave offense go unpunished.” Pollen’s eyes sharpen, and her pupils have changed. The iris completely gone and there’s only a dark blue sheen. The fuzz on her body sticks upright, sharp and bristling and dark.

This is not a bee. This is a wasp.

“No,” He growls, “No we aren’t. Like hell someone can just take Plagg without consequence. When I get my hands on them-”

“Enough of that!” Pollen barks, “Don’t lose yourself to your anger. We must stay in control of ourselves. We’re not in the state to transform or for you to sense Plagg. We need food, water, and tea.”

Adrien inhales sharply, “We’re not wasting time on tea!”

“You need to restore yourself!”

“I’ll do that with medicine!” Adrien almost yells as he beings to head towards the school, but he won’t draw attention and get Pollen taken too.

“Yes! Tea!”

Taking a slow breath- don’t get worked up- Adrien hisses softly back. “There’s more effective medicine than tea out there now. I’ll take that.”

“Even better then, we’ll make ourselves strong and they cannot oppose us.”

Adrien almost stumbles at that, stupid failing body should be better than this, because even if he’s in his best condition it doesn’t even matter because he can’t use the bee miraculous well. It’d be one thing if Pollen was taken and he could be Chat Noir, but he has to assume whoever has Gigga is much more component with wielding that miraculous than he is with the bee.

The bee can’t even track like he can as Chat Noir. How is he even supposed to find-

“My King, remember, breathing.”

Adrien sucks air through his teeth, “How are we even supposed to find Plagg? I can’t just use GPS or something to find his ring-”

Pollen flies down to his hand, one that he’s trying to keep tucked in and out of sight. “You have bonded with destruction. I can feel traces of it impressed in your soul when you transform. The ring may be lost, but you are still connected to Plagg.”

There is relief to that. Immense relief. He can find Plagg and he will tear through all of the ends of the earth to get him back as long as he knows where he is. Yet it’s also a blast of heat. Plagg can be found and he will do whatever it takes to get him back. He can find Plagg.

Adrien can stop this person who took him. If he can find Plagg, he can also get revenge.

He stumbles again, his body distantly aches, echoes with pain shoved away, and Adrien scowls at it. If Plagg was here- if he had the ring- he could just pull the power and push it through him until-

Adrien stamps that down and draws the buzz out of the ring. The vibrations are awful, a constant grind in his bones that he hates, but he shoves them down through his body anyway. He can’t afford to waste time on this, to be concerned with little peeves when Plagg has been stolen.

Right now he has Pollen. And Pollen’s with him. Pollen cares. Even if it’s because she cares more about Plagg than him, that’s fine. As long as it gets Plagg back. He’ll take whatever he can to fix this. To bring Plagg back.

And if the person who did this dares try and stop him? Adrien will destroy them. He’ll tear them apart for what they’ve done. Someone like this shouldn’t exist on the earth. They stole Plagg. They are trying to control destruction itself and Adrien will make them feel what destruction is. They will suffer for it. They should-

He inhales, focusing, and pulls more from the bee comb into him. It buzzes and makes his bones itch and muscles curl, but Adrien will not lose this battle. He will not lose control of himself.

It’ll all come back so much worse, the headache and pains and nausea, but he doesn’t care. Not now, not when Plagg’s out there, taken, stolen, and Adrien can get him back.

He’ll do anything to get him back.

With his body back in his grip and thoughts focused, he starts running. Pollen said that he needs to give his body all the necessary things, but not rest, not right now. He’ll eat and he’ll get water but as far as anyone knows, Adrien’s still at his house and still at school. No one truly knows where he is and no one will question that until school is supposed to end.  

Adrien sneaks as best he can, slipping through the empty hallways to get to his locker. His bag can stay there, he doesn’t care, but he needs all the emergency food bars. They’re thousands of calories and nutrients that he gorged on when first becoming Chat Noir and wanted to be transformed all the time. He still eats them from time to time, but he’s changed his diet in general to adapt to it.

Now he eats three and stuffs the rest into his pockets. Then he drains his water bottle along with a few painkillers and multivitamins. All he has to do now is fill up his water bottle again and he can head down to his hideout and figure out where Plagg is from there. Strategize with Pollen. Maybe she’ll have advice on the runes, ideas from looking at his notebooks.

His phone lights up, something he can’t take because that could be tracked and he can’t have that right now, with a message from Nino. He’s asking if he’s okay and coming back to school.

Nino.

His chest tightens, and Adrien clenches his jaw and pushes that down as he fires off a quick reply. Adrien refuses to bring Nino into this. Not right now at least. Soon, if he can’t get Plagg today, then he’ll tell Ladybug and the others and they’ll figure it out.

But Ladybug will want to think it through. She’ll want to be kind. Think of a plan that, while it would probably work, be low-risk. Make sure no one gets hurt. It’ll take time.

And Adrien doesn’t want that. They stole Plagg. He is going to find them now and he doesn’t want to be kind about it at all. Anything to get him back right now. This very day.

Adrien inhales sharply as he closes his locker. Nino. Nino who has the miraculous of protection. Adrien hasn’t used that miraculous either. He’s used it less than Pollen’s, but that’s exactly what he wants right now. He wants to protect Plagg. Protection feels more instinctive right now than subjugation, he can use that. And then he wouldn’t have to worry as much about getting hit.

And, and and and, he’ll still have Pollen to do recon to. She can still help guide him when Adrien makes his move. And he can work on the runes. A rune of control. If he can figure that out now, then Adrien can still have his attack while staying protected.

Adrien doesn’t have to use the miraculouses full strength- this bastard is probably expecting that- all he has to do is have the kwamis help him. And together they’ll put this thief in their place and make sure they can never do anything like this ever again.

This isn’t a one-on-one fight. No, Adrien’s stacking the odds in his favor. He’s going in hard and fast.

His face twitches, he glares and tries to soothe his features but he can’t when Plagg’s out there, as he sneaks back out. The plan bubbles and froths in his head, hissing and clawing and festering in his body. A coil of tension winding, freezing and boiling all at once, and Adrien scowls- “Buzz on”- and then glares at the city before slipping towards his hideout.

Nothing, absolutely nothing, takes Plagg away and gets away with it. Not while he’s alive.

 

“Well Pollen,” Adrien looks down at his desk, there are papers and supplies everywhere, messy bandages and trash that he’d usually cataclysm away, and a half empty energy drink. “What do you think?”

Because within all that mess are stones etched with Pollen’s symbol that resonate power. They’re more powerful than anything he made with Plagg. With his arm still leaking blood, it got onto some of his first attempts and he could feel the potency instantly rise. The only good thing to come out of his arm’s messed up state.

Thankfully it was easy to get out of the photoshoot by letting Pollen’s influence on his body fade and everyone deemed him sick before seeing anything odd. Maybe they would have pressed, but Nathalie only hummed when he looked at her and freed his schedule.

But if he was found out and then delayed further? God, he doesn’t even want to think about what he would do for how it makes his blood boil and thoughts pitch into an enraged ring.

Adrien could only make about five of the stones, having to slowly crave them and then stuff the insides with bloody chalk. It’s not a lot, but each of them can freeze someone.

Someone like Nino too.

Which is tragic and awful and he hates it, but Nino can’t wake up. If he wakes up and realizes that his miraculous is gone and then the panic and the fear he’ll go through… Adrien won’t do it. And Adrien will give it back by the end of the end. He only needs Wayzz for this. And if it doesn’t work then he’ll tell the whole team.

The plan is that the thief will try to catch one of the rocks and then freeze. Backup plan is that he shoves the rock on them. But even if he just hits him and only gets a second where he’s forced still, it will be enough.

“He is but a pawn to us.” Pollen nods at him, “We will beat him.”

Adrien nods back, glaring and tensing as he thinks about the person who stole Plagg about what he will do to him. How he can’t feel a single doubt or worry about this, about what he will do if necessary.

“There is another command phrase that you can use. It helps funnel our abilities into something specific.” Pollen says, her antenna are twitching but her gaze is hard when she looks at him. “I do not know Wayzz’s phrases except for his generic one, but if something goes wrong and you need help, call to me and say ‘stinger out’.”

“What will it do?”

“It is more violent. If something cannot be controlled, then the last option is to try end it.” Pollen hums, “It might even work better with you, considering it is the more destructive side of my miraculous.”

A part of Adrien wants to refuse it, but no, absolutely not. If this person stands in the way of getting Plagg? Adrien’s not going to hesitate.

“Thank you Pollen,” He nods to her, “For everything.”

“You are welcome. Now, let’s not waste anymore time.”

“Pollen! Buzz on!”

The transform swarms him, and Adrien flies with it. It’s not natural, it isn’t anything like Plagg’s, nothing like his friend’s, but all of Adrien’s reservations to keep the bee’s power distant, that it felt wrong and uncomfortable, they are all gone now. It’s gone along with Plagg. He’ll take every single discomfort and pain if it means he has the power to go through with this.

Nino’s asleep when Adrien gets to his window. He isn’t perfectly silent, but Nino doesn’t stir and Adrien detransforms. Putting his hand to the lock and willing it towards Pollen, she goes in and undoes the lock. Wayzz hasn’t woken up Nino, thankfully, and so Adrien darts over and puts the stone on Nino before slipping the bracelet off him.

“What is the meaning of this?” Wayzz shouts as soon as the miraculous is in his hands. “Miraculous are not meant to-”

Sharply, Adrien lifts his hand. It’s still black and feels awful and under his jacket is a bunch of wraps because the skin is dried and cracked apart and still bleeding probably because when someone torn off that ring they tore out parts of Adrien too. And, if he wants to tear his skin and flesh like that by taking the ring, then Adrien will rip into him using his sharpened bones.

All at once, Wayzz goes from upset and panicky to downright still with a glare.

“Yeah,” Adrien hisses as he wraps the miraculous around his wrist. His right one. It hurts, god it hurts and the area floods warm and wet and molten needles stab everywhere, but it doesn’t matter. That area of him is broken down, greater access to his soul, and it guarantees a more powerful transformation without the practice.

Adrien wheezes for a moment, getting his bearings back and prying his arm from where it’s instinctively cradled to his chest, and straightens up. He doesn’t have time to waste. He refuses to let Plagg suffer for any longer. To let that demon of a man have control of Plagg for a second longer than necessary!

“Come on, buzz on.”

Adrien slips back out and then heads to where he traced Plagg hours ago. He can’t feel it very well when transformed with Pollen, so he’ll have to check that Plagg hasn’t moved, but he hopes not. He scouted that building, left a note at home to investigate this address if he can’t get back and remove it.

It took everything he had not to just barge in there. But no, no Adrien will not take that risk with Plagg.

“Buzz off.” Pollen appears, and, with a quick nod to her that he does still feel Plagg there, she zooms towards the apartment.

“You have reason to believe that Plagg is in there?” Wayzz glares at the building, almost completely still.

“Yes. Pollen says that the thief has Gigga with them as well. That’s how he took the ring. Hit me right as I detransformed.”

Wayzz doesn’t move, but there’s a sudden hard warmth pressing into him from his miraculous. “And you were not in good condition during the fight.”

“You could tell?”

“Nino’s very concerned about you, in and out of the mask, and instinctually pushes my powers towards you.” Wayzz looks at him for a long moment. “Most tellingly, he talks to me about you.”

Adrien clenches his jaw, the rise of tension and horror at the betrayal he’s done to Nino when Nino’s been nothing but amazing to him, but it’s not the time. Adrien is getting Plagg back and then he’ll return Wayzz to Nino. That’s the bottom line, that’s all that’s important.

“He does care,” Adrien mutters, “I’m not sure if I’m worth it, but I’ll fight for him too.”

“For now though, we will get Plagg back.”

Adrien stiffens, shoulders curling up as he scowls down. “Right. So I’ll transform with you for the added protection against the other. The plan is to catch them unaware, stun them, and then take back both Gigga and Plagg.”

“Is there a backup plan?”

“I’ll retransform with Pollen. She’s given me… she’s given me a more violent phrase.”

Wayzz nods slowly, “Transform with me for a moment, I wish to see how compatible we are before going into this.”

“Wayzz, shell on.”

If destruction is a pounce of lightning and control a swarm of buzzes, then protection can only be described as a cascade of stones. It is heavy and unyielding. Where with Plagg and especially Pollen, Adrien felt light and graceful, Wayzz is nothing but weight and strength. His skin doesn’t even feel like skin, the rest of the world only felt through echoes of sensation.

No wonder Nino is able to causally take hits and push cars to the side, the strength here is immense.

Adrien moves around, stretches and then modifies the suit a little. He doesn’t care to look at it much or what the armor around him looks like, as long as it’s black and doesn’t make noise.

“Shell off.”

He can feel Pollen getting closer- this is it, he’s getting Plagg back- and glances at Wayzz to see if he has anything to say.

“If you wish, you could use the phrase ‘harden my skin’. You likely won’t be able to call a shellter, but you’ll be more protected.”

Adrien nods. Then he thinks about when he gets Plagg back.

“Does Plagg have any other phrases?”

For the first time, Wayzz’s stony posture breaks when he glances down and away. “No, his miraculous was never studied.”

Adrien doesn’t get to ask more, before the sharp anger lashing out in his chest gets a chance to burst out, before Pollen arrives. “My King, our pervious entry plan still works. The miraculous is a necklace. The entirety of it is hidden under his shirt, but it is there. He’s holding onto the ring. He isn’t talking to Plagg nor is he wearing it, but he also didn’t put the ring down either while I was watching.”

“Alright then,” Adrien takes a deep breath, “Wayzz, harden my skin.”

Gasping, Adrien buckles under the weight of the transformation. It’s much more taxing like this, and he can’t get a breath of fresh air with the new face guard over his mouth. But it’s not like they’re fighting in an open arena where they’ll be moving around. No, Adrien’s going to get in close and crush them.

Adrien jumps, aiming for the alley next to the thief’s building. The ground cracks and crumbles slightly under his impact, and it’ll be like that forever as Adrien begins to climb. It’s difficult to get up, he has the strength to pull himself but not the speed and agility to carry his momentum. And he can’t fall because he can’t make a clatter again and alert the thief that he’s coming.

He pushes his hand against the window, Pollen influencing it and opening it up. Slowly, the transformation now has shell armor covering all of him except for his joints. It is heavy and clunky. He’ll take it, but he doesn’t want to make any noise. It might be inevitable, there’s wood flooring that looks like it will creak, but he’ll delay it for as long as he can.

Pollen leads him through the kitchen type area. It’s an apartment and some type of eastern medicine or mediative place. Adrien doesn’t care. He doesn’t care about this person’s life or anything else. After taking Plagg, using their own miraculous to do it, Adrien’s taking him down.

He won’t be a threat after tonight. Adrien’s going to guarantee it.

Adrien pulls out his stones, leaning against the wall as Pollen gives him three nods. The signal that he’s in that room and he’ll be able to see him.

Right there, in that room, is Plagg and the man who stole him!

Jumping out- the man whirling around at the thud- Adrien flings a stone at the man. He dodges it, tragic for him since that was the least painful route, and Adrien’s already leaping to tackle him. To throw him on the ground and then rip his miraculous off.

Mid-leap, the man moves despite his apparent age. He doesn’t just move, he blurs, on the other side of the room before Adrien can land and spin around.

“You are sicker than I thought.” He says, infuriately calm, “If you could track Plagg without the ring.”

“Give him back!” He shouts and runs at him again, fists clenches before he plants a foot and swings at him. Using all the illegal strikes in savate.

The man dodges again, so fast, too fast, and the wood crunches underfoot. The frame buckling in. And Adrien charges as a swirl of gray, no command words, take over the man. The spider transformation is nothing like Anansi, more like a tarantula that skitters away and dodges every punch and kick and lunge that Adrien throws at him.

Just one hit, one hit and he’ll freeze. Adrien’s not leaving without Plagg.

The man pulls out two needles, daggers for how long and sharp they look, and Adrien throws all three stones. Starting to pull on Wayzz for more strength, more strength so he can go faster and more protection.

He moves to swat one as he moves to meet Adrien in his charge. He freezes for an instant, finally a moment where he is still, and Adrien plows into him. Curling his arms and legs around him, uncaring how he might retaliate when he’s the turtle right now, and starts to squeeze.

A bright light hits his eyes, surely a power, and his eyes tingle with an image of the rooftop with the cool air around him, but its only an echo. The dream-like quality of the present settling back into being real.

Adrien squeezes harder. First Plagg and now the man tries to take his memories? He should have just caught one of the stones and make it easy for the both of them. Now he’s going to crush him until he can’t attack back.

Distantly, Adrien feels a few jabs in his side- and despite not detransforming- all the power and assistance he’s taking vanishes. His body shouting out in pain, throbbing as his right arm cramps and seizes up.

Grunting, the man throws Adrien off and he’s quick to snap power back into him once that sensation ends. The two of them glaring at each other. Adrien’s out of stones, they’re both transformed, and now he knows that he can’t get in close with whatever that nonsense of a trick that is.

Plagg is right there. Pocketed somewhere and hidden in his transformation, and Adrien can’t get him!

“I cannot give you the ring back.” The man says. “Simply turn around and forget all of this.”

Adrien bristles. He is so sick and tired of everyone taking everything away from him! He’s tired of being told exactly what to do and never being able to do anything about it! He made a promise to Plagg to be there, and he is not giving that up. Nothing will ever make him go back on his word.

“Hand over your miraculous and Plagg,” Adrien lowers back into a fighting stance. “And I’ll forget about you.”

The man only sighs, like Adrien’s just throwing a temper tantrum and then springs forward. Those needles of him jabbing and poking- never really getting through the armor- and Adrien throws his weight around so he isn’t able to do any of that awful pattern jab to make him lose the miraculous powers.

He doesn’t pull out of his shield, needing his hands to reach for his neck and yank the miraculous off, but then one of those needles goes through his right bicep. With a shout- the arm lighting up- Adrien snaps out a kick and throws him back into the wall. Maybe he needs the shield, but he doesn’t know how to fight with it.

“You cannot win this fight. I have decades of experience.”

Adrien glares, can feel the erratic spasms of his arm, where destruction has marked him, and he shifts what meager powers he has towards the power he has now. Towards the bracelet. Shuddering as he opens himself more to Wayzz’s powers. His heart buckling in its rapid beating before drumming harder. His guts rolling before they stiffen up.

“Well,” Adrien can feel the barriers that Wayzz make. Impenetrable. And he pulls them out, shapes them as claws over his fingers. Weapons he’s familiar with. “I’m adaptable.”

All eight black beady eyes squint at him, “Then I shall tire you out. You are much too thoughtless to carry any miraculous at all.”  

Adrien leaps, a swirl of slashes and kicks against the jabbing weaves of the spider. And each of his hits start to hurt more. There’s more of Wayzz he can access, more protection he can pull into him, but despite it all it’s beginning to fray him. He can’t get his breath fast enough, his heart can’t pound hard enough, and no matter the strength he tries to summon it is too heavy for him to hold.

He needs to do something more again-

Pollen is flying at the stones, struggling to pick one up, and Adrien pivots, trying to keep the man’s back away from the stone as he presses in close. He gets another stab ripping through his thigh, but he presses harder anyway.

The man freezes, and Adrien rips his miraculous right off his neck. Not wasting a second as he continues running forward, scooping up the ring as it tumbles out of the grey string flashing and unwinding from the man.

Who grunts, the stone clattering to the ground, as Adrien shoves them into a wall and then slams his glowing green claws around his throat. Pinning him there.

“You-”

“Let me make myself painfully clear.” Adrien growls, “I know who you are now. If you try to get anywhere close to me, I won’t need a miraculous to take you down. You try anything at all and you won’t have anything left.”

The man frowns, as if only merely disgusted and put off by him. “So that’s what you’ll be then. Destruction incarnate? Tearing people down and breaking everything around you just to try and hold onto what will, inevitably, crumble in your grasp?”

Adrien doesn’t really care about what this guy says, he lost and Adrien won back Plagg, but he does see Plagg shrivel up a bit at the corner of his eye.

“And you are obviously ignorance incarnate.” Adrien leans in, putting pressure on his throat. “If you think I’ll listen to a thief who believes that destruction is only some mindless black hole when nothing could be further from the truth. When it saves us from drowning.”

“To destroy the water is to eventually die of thirst.”

“I wasn’t being fucking literal!” Adrien growls, “But if you want me to, I could make a pruning metaphor and remove you from the world myself.”  

Oh, it’s a dark glee when the man glares. “You have me to-”

“So I’m going now, and this better be the last I ever see or hear of you again.”

Adrien brings up his other hand, quickly jabbing the man in the kidneys that is sure to make it hard for him to follow, and then runs out of there. Calling off Wayzz as he slips the ring back onto his finger- the relief that eases through his bones is no little thing- and jumps into the alley.

“Claws out!”

Adrien never hits the ground, claws embedding into the stone and he laughs as he pounces. Racing upwards and throwing himself up into the city. He doesn’t fly like with Pollen or march like with Wayzz, but he can run. He runs and runs, cartwheeling and laughing, and very, very eagerly throws a mugger he comes across to the ground with an alert to the police.

He gets tired fast though, and he flops down onto the roof of Nino’s apartment. “Claws in.”

Laying there, four tiny beings of immense power float around him in a fuzzy sort of state that tells Adrien that he might pass out soon. He feels kinda floaty and tingly and numb.

But then Plagg curls up into his chest. He doesn’t say anything, but he starts purring and Adrien tips his head towards up as he cups his hand around him. Plagg. He has Plagg back. It wasn’t even a day but Adrien never ever wants to go a day without him. Today was so awful.

And it could have been so much worse.

He sighs, breathes as he tries to look up at the stars far, far up there. He stares at them as the exhaustion swarms and pulls his body far from his mind. He just stares and holds onto the sensation of Plagg on his chest and purring and he just feels it. Holds it precious in his heart.

“Adrien,” Something’s shaking him. “Adrien, you must get up.”

Groaning, pulling himself back to the world and his body is the worst. Literally the worst sensation he has ever felt. He twitches and his muscles screech as they try to stretch out when they can’t. The worst feeling that he has ever experienced. The absolute worst ever. Worse than those cloning gremlins or whatever they were. Worse than Anansi. Even worse than Style Queen.

No, wait, it’s not as bad as when he lost Plagg. When he was struck stupid and everything hurt and he couldn’t do anything about it immediately because of who he is as Adrien. Plain, broken Adrien.

His body hates him, but he’s no longer bleeding. He has Plagg back, he can bandage it all up and move on now.

“You must return my miraculous to Nino before his family gets up.”

Adrien groans- is it really that late now?- his muscles twitching in a slow response to his command. “Alright, yeah, okay, Plagg? You up?”

He gets a similar grumble in response. “Yeah, okay, let’s do this.”

Nodding- ooh, ow, his head hates that- Adrien licks his lips and calls for the transformation. Which feels good, objectively, but also he thinks he might throw up once he pulls himself to his feet. At least his body’s responding to him, like he has his strength back.

And it’s natural moving with Plagg. That he can slip in and out of Nino’s window without much of an issue. Taking his stone and returning Wayzz, profoundly thanking him over and over again, and then running back to his place. He knows he still has to deal with Gigga. Who’s been silent despite how Adrien can only imagine how this looks to them. But maybe he can get home and sleep a little longer before he has to?

“My King,” Pollen gently nuzzles his chin as he lands in his room, trudging back to his bed. “Would you please lay Gigga’s and my miraculous together? I would like to speak to them.”

Oh, wonderful. He breaks out into a relieved grin, nodding and thank Pollen as he calls off the transformation and with arms aching to reach up he manages to pull out the bee comb and set the spider necklace on top of it. It takes more energy than what he’d like to admit to do such a simple thing. That it doesn’t even hurt as much as it’s numbing away.

Then he faceplants on his bed, Plagg curled up on his back, and instantly falls back asleep.

 

When Adrien wakes up, he’s pretty sure he’s not actually awake at all.

“Whoa,” He quickly backpedals away from the purply- not quite purple, it’s such a rich purple, velvet and pure and strong that invokes such a strong sense of energy and power unlike any of violets he’s ever seen- goop that balloons up and then just continues floating up.

There’s no gravity that he can feel, but if this is a lucid dream then it doesn’t come with instant flying powers. Boo.

Adrien turns, there are crystals everywhere, gleaming bright but never enough to sting. He reaches out to touch one. He doesn’t really touch it, he can’t feel the sensation of it anyway, but it dissolves up into white mist when he gets close.

A strange yellow swirl springs up in its absence. Almost flower-like in how it moves but so cloudy and detached from itself. Like it’s more a bunch of glitter clinging to itself and shape.

If he were to talk to a dream therapist about this, he wonders what they’d say. A huge cavern of these dark rainbow crystals, or perhaps not a cavern at all for how immense it is, sometimes broken up with more of those glittering yellow swirls. There’s only one of the purple… balloon blob things. And a rock or two with this reaching hexagonal grasp that holds onto the crystals.

Then he looks down.

Frowning, there’s a wispy golden liquid softly swishing but not really moving either. At least this isn’t dissolving at his touch. If anything it feels… dim. He doesn’t like looking at it at least.

He kinda likes it here as he wonders around. The dream stubbornly stays out of his reach, unwilling to change. Though perhaps he just doesn’t know how to. It would be nice to know for the next time he gets a nightmare. Or even if he knew how to come back here when that happens. Adrien wouldn’t mind being here over a nightmare.

There’s a strange peace here. It’s profound in a way he can’t grasp.

So Adrien simply wanders. He thinks that it might be like a small globe, because any direction he picks eventually takes him back to the purple blob. It moves with him and doesn’t. There’s no end, no place to go, but he’s strangely content to just stare.

And it’s not completely the same everywhere. There’re sections where the crystals have plunged into the golden lake here. Those ones, like the lake, are weird to look at. The golden swirls are going into it, and while the lake glimmers around the touch of the crystal it doesn’t seem equal. The crystals seem to expand up and up and out and out, whereas the lake is only so big. Eventually the lake might be just slurped up.

Or maybe that’s too dream therapist of him. There’s likely nothing wrong with it. There’s nothing even here.

Yeah, yeah. Adrien nods to his thoughts and meanders his way over to one of them. The yellow spirals aren’t anywhere close to the surface of the lake, now that he looks all of them are swirling up and away, but maybe this crystal won’t vanish on him.

Only a bit of a distance away from it, Adrien slows. He can’t say why, but it seems big. Fragile. Like he really shouldn’t be touching this. Messing it up.

It’s just a dream though.

With that thought, the glimmers that he’s standing in sudden shoot up in a brilliant green explosion that overwhelms his sight-

 

-and he blinks his eyes to see two paramedics standing over him.

“Wha…” His tongue doesn’t shape words very well, and Adrien reaches out to Plagg so he can feel his body again and scoot back on his bed and away from them.

“Hey, easy there,” One of them gives a gentle smile, “Just take some deep breaths for me.”

“Why are you here?” He snaps back, glancing at Plagg who’s hissing down at his shoulder. “What- what are you doing in my room?”

They’ve clearly got experience with handling their facial expressions. A brief surprise flutters over them, a few blinks from one and a slight eyebrow raise, before they both return to calm and focused. Which is suspicious. That’s the face people make when they’re about to ask you of something and want you to agree.

“Adrien!” His father is in the background, Nathalie by his side, and one of the paramedics gestures them back. “That’s my son! I wish to-”

They argue, the paramedic trying to calm down Father, and Adrien glances at Plagg.

“They tried to- they” He hisses, eyes bright despite how faint he is. “They jabbed a needle into you and it- I don’t know what it is but it was dimming your body. And Pollen’s and Gigga’s miraculous are still out. They’ve managed to scoot them under the desk, but neither of them were renounced to have good control and Kit-”

Adrien scratches at his shoulder, trying his best to pet Plagg as he takes the situation in. “Look, I, um, I would like to talk to my father. Can I do that?”

He interrupted whatever the paramedic said, a flow of calming words that he thinks is meant to relax him, but Adrien can’t feel guilty when there’s too much going on right now. He just got Plagg back and he isn’t risking whatever this is too lose everything all over again.

“We just need to ask you a few questions-”

“That’s great-” Adrien pulls harder on the ring, his ears itching and eyes pulsing as he pushes himself upright and standing up. He almost stumbles, his balance swirling before settling, but he stands upright and gives them his most winning smile he can muster up- “But do you think you can hold all questions until we get to the foyer? I’ll do my best then, but I’d like to talk to my father first.”

“Yes,” Father all but leers down on them, “Since my son is in fact healthy and alert, I would like to speak with him.”

“In fact,” Nathalie steps in, like the saint she is. “With Adrien’s condition stable, we’ll likely go to the hospital ourselves. We appreciate your promptness and your help in waking him up.”

“Well,” One of them glances back at him even as they’re herded out of the room, “The fact that he’s awake…”

The door shuts behind them, and Adrien glances up at Father. “What would you like to discuss with me?”

“Adrien, have you been feeling unwell?” Father places a hand on his shoulder, the one where Plagg is, and it takes everything he has not to buckle under it. From the constant soft hiss from Plagg, it’s likely taking everything he has as well to not react.

“Not especially.” He glances down, sucks in more energy from the ring. “Tired perhaps.”

“Any… dizzy spells?” Father staring off at the wall next to Adrien, not at him. “Breathing troubles?”

“Nothing of that nature.”

Father hums, “You’ll stay here for the remainder of the day. I’ll have Nathalie get a doctor to come here to evaluate you.” Father squeezes his shoulder, Adrien’s right-hand twitches and flexes with claws that aren’t there. “I’ll leave you here to rest. Your bodyguard will check in every quarter hour on your health.”

Then he leaves too. Which, because of the kwamis he has in his room, is objectively a good thing. It makes this easier.

It would have been nice if Father asked if he wanted anything or just said something more, but it’s clearly plain to see since he’s moving about and can either get something or ask himself. It’s fine, it’s good.

Plagg grumbles as Adrien looks over to his desk where he last put down the miraculous. “Kit, come on, you can leave them for a little while longer. Let’s just rest.”

Adrien should resist. Pollen did so much for him yesterday. Gigga just got taken from their holder. A quick glance outside tells him it’s still morning- it couldn’t have been that many hours since all of this- and he should text Nino to make sure he’s alright and then the group chat with him, Marinette, and Alya he’s not going to school so they can hopefully bring him notes and his homework.

He flops down on the couch, sighing in relief as his muscles go lax.

“Hey,” Adrien keeps his eyes open and reaches up, petting Plagg and coaxing him to curl up in his hands. Shadows bleeding out of fingers and up his right arm. “Are you alright?”

Plagg peels his eyes open, “Course I am. Wasn’t even gone for a day.”

The way Plagg says it, as if to call to attention that a day is nothing to a being that has lasted for all eternity and will continue to, it makes Adrien squint at him. Since if this is supposed to be some insignificant day, Plagg sure isn’t acting like it’s a normal day.  

“I wasn’t alright.” Adrien admits, his right-hand twitching. “So, so I’m really glad that- that-” He swallows, throat suddenly burning. “That you’re back. I’m going to always want you back, you know that. Right? No matter what I have to do. I’m gonna get you back.”

“Yeah, guess this was a pain without me.” Plagg pokes at the black skin, which relaxes and cools at the touch.

“I suppose, but it mostly…” Adrien sighs, needing to blink. “I felt so helpless when you were taken. And I was so angry. I don’t even remember, people would talk to me and I just shut them down. I couldn’t talk to them when you’ve been ripped out of my grasp.”

Plagg begins to rumble softly, nuzzling Adrien’s hand. “I was… I thought he was going to change the miraculous back. Or just lock it away.”

Hot fear and anger burst in his chest, and Adrien shakes slightly. He tries to relax again, but he just can’t as he curls a bit over Plagg. Since he was going to be- that bastard was going to- Plagg would end up-

God, he can’t even think it. He doesn’t want to think it. That Plagg, destruction itself, helpless to escape and-

“I’m so sorry.” He swallows, reaching for the ring. Not for power or anything but just in a desperate need to soothe Plagg. Himself. He can’t even tell but everything aches and his eyes are prickling and he doesn’t want to either of them to hurt anymore. “I- I’ll think of something to make sure that can’t happen again. I won’t let anyone hurt you again. Or even threaten you. Or anything. Nothing. Nothing, I swear Plagg I won’t let that happen again.”

The rumbling gets a little louder as Plagg tilts into his hand. “Thanks Kit. And it wasn’t your fault, that guy knew what he was doing.”

“Yeah, well-” Adrien growls off to the side- “I did it better.”

Plagg smirks up at him, “That’s ‘cause I trained you Kit.”

Adrien scoffs, “Oh yeah, your plentiful words of encouragement to nap while I was practicing really elevated me to new levels.”  

“It’s important to rest.”

“It’s also important to communicate-” Hard lessons that’s a struggle to learn, but still, he needs to have words with other kwamis- “So come on, show me where they hid their miraculouses.”

Plagg gestures to where the necklace and comb lay, and Adrien carefully picks them back up. He buckles, gravity feeling just a bit stronger before letting up, and he carries them all over to the couch because he doesn’t want to have this conversation standing up. Although he gets the feeling he might get worked up enough to stand up.

He also grabs his phone and sets a seven minute timer which should roughly be the time when his bodyguard comes in.

“Hi,” He waves to the spider kwami. “Um, so I’m Adrien-”

“I am Gigga.”

Adrien smiles, it’s forced but he’s too good for anyone to see through that. “It’s nice to meet you. I, uh, wish it could have been in better circumstances.”

“Yes, the removal of a miraculous is not pleasant.” All eight of their red eyes blink at him. “I am sorry it happened to you.”

“And I’m sorry I did that to you.”

The kwami nods, sighs. “Do not fret too much. It is my nature to forget.”

“That doesn’t make it right. Even if you instantly forget it, you could feel it in the moment and I didn’t want you to be in pain I just…” Adrien fumbles, the words sprung out of him and now he doesn’t know how to continue. “I was just trying to save Plagg.”  

“Nothing can destroy Plagg.”

“Well, I was just trying to get him back.”

Gigga nods, “Pollen explained this. And I do understand that you resonate with Plagg, which is very exciting.”

“Exciting?”

“No one before has who has resonated with Plagg has worn his ring. What that means is completely unknown.” Gigga perks up at him, eyes squinting. “Even now I can sense that you are learning.”

“Um,” This conversation is not going how Adrien planned. But if the kwami doesn’t seem to be upset to be gone from their previous holder- which, a dark thought hisses, is maybe because Gigga is relieved to be gone because that bastard can’t even treat his kwami companion right- then Adrien won’t press them to be upset. “Doesn’t that diminish your domain?”

“Ignorance comes in many forms. You can have knowledge and not be wise. You can be wise and have no knowledge. Pure ignorance is the ignorance in rocks and water, where there is no memory. My domain cannot be diminished as long as this exists.”

“Okay, but, like changed?”

“It is of an inconsequential amount. Besides,” Gigga… smiles. Despite the fangs, it’s probably a smile. “The wonderful part of ignorance means that there is always something to learn!”

Adrien smiles too, since, yeah, that’s nice.

Then his smile drops, since, shit, Ladybug is ignorant of the fact there’s another miraculous out and about. Of that man with the tricks that can subdue the powers. Who knows how much more potent it would have been if Adrien was transformed with Pollen. What if Hawk Moth finds that person? What if then he knows?

They have to take care of that risk.

“Okay,” He claps his hands and looks to all of the kwamis around him. “How should we go about telling Ladybug about this?”

Plagg groans, “Deal with it later.”

“There’s a patrol tonight, is there not?” Pollen offers, “You can tell her then.”

“Do you mean Tikki’s holder?”

They all talk roughly at the same time, but he’s still able to hear most of it. Adrien nods over at Gigga and then considers what Pollen said. There could be another akuma, there likely will be another akuma, and Adrien’s not entirely sure what Hawk Moth will do. If he’ll try to throw as many akumas as possible at them or wait and design a specific one.

Both sound awful. But at least the multiple option would be easier for him. They usually wrap up pretty fast and he’d be able to get home. He can’t say the same for the rest of the team. Especially since it is school time.

“Patrol then, great.” Adrien relaxes against the couch, hopefully free from much stress and heavy conversations for most of the day. “Now, Gigga, Pollen, let me introduce you to Mario Kart.”

It takes a little effort for them to interact with the controller, Adrien’s gotten much better with doing this with Plagg but he needs to use the ring to open up their miraculous to do so for them. Yet soon enough Adrien’s got all the controllers going, and when his bodyguard comes in, Adrien just pauses the game and tells him he’s playing against a computer.

Which, between that and napping and talking to Plagg and Pollen and Gigga that make so much noise and take up space, it’s not a bad way to spend so much time in his room.

Notes:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nsctq0NPWGg
Just one of the songs that I listened to while writing this.

Chapter 10: The Dark Owl

Eventually, Adrien pulls himself away from his video games to get to his computer and try to do some work that he missed from today. Though he does bring his phone because Nino sometimes sneaks a text to him and he doesn’t want to miss that.

“My King,” Pollen burrows up next to his neck, “Would it be possible to nap again instead?”

“Pollen,” With three kwamis that can’t see each other, Adrien’s learned that he has to speak slightly differently. More repetitive. “You’re starting to sound like Plagg with all the nap talk.”

Plagg snorts from up in his hair. “She’s finally learning some sense then.”

“Plagg is one of the oldest kwamis.” Gigga comments, “He’s probably quite knowledgeable.”

“Plagg’s only knowledge about cheese.”

He gets a scoff from Plagg and a giggle from Pollen, both of them lazing on him as he works on his computer. Gigga’s also sometimes on him, not lazing around and instead going from flying around and inspecting his room to latching onto his forearm- all eight limbs, feels kinda weird- and poking at his muscles as he types and moves the mouse.

His bodyguard comes in, Adrien gives him a rundown of what he’s feeling and then asks for a painkiller for the headache while he signs to him that the doctor will be arriving tomorrow morning.

“Okay-” Clearing his throat, to get the attention of all the kwamis- “Maybe I should learn what exactly happened this morning to get this attention.”

“Well, you were asleep, for, like, ever. You wouldn’t get up with the alarm or when your caretaker came in.” Plagg prattles on. “No one around to feed me cheese, it was tragic.”

“I apologize, my King, I don’t know much.” Pollen mutters, “I was spending my time talking to Gigga until the people came.”

Gigga shrugs, “You laid there as Pollen and I talked.”

“So,” Pollen starts, “Was the first lady your mother?”

“Oh, Nathalie? She works for my father, my mother…” Adrien reaches into his pocket and squeezes the peacock brooch. Relaxing as he sighs. “My mother disappeared a few years ago.”

“My sincerest apologies again…” Pollen nuzzles her head against his neck, “I only wish to grow more familiar with you, and I’m sorry to make you sad.”

“Aw,” Gigga sighs against his wrist, “There’s so much you won’t know now.”

“It’s alright Pollen, Gigga.” He tilts his head back towards her and uses his other hand to gently stroke Gigga, “I do wish circumstances were better, but that doesn’t ruin the now. I’m happy that I’ve gotten the chance to meet you two.”

“Pssh,” Plagg grumbles and starts fussing with his, “What am I? Rotten cheese?”

Rolling his eyes, Adrien reaches up to scratch Plagg’s ears. And sure enough, within a couple of seconds, he’s purring against his hair.

He blinks, lungs shuddering and collapsing, at the thought that he might not have ever seen Plagg again. He didn’t really think about it yesterday, angry and determined that he would get Plagg back and nothing would stop him, and god- he was willing to- he wasn’t holding back on that man.

What would he have done if he couldn’t get Plagg- oh god, he could have lost Plagg forever. If Pollen wasn’t there. If Wayzz wasn’t there. If he never, if they-

“Just- uh…” Adrien breathes slowly, reaches for the lazing kwamis to pet them. Holds them and feels them as he wills his heart not to pick up any faster. “Let me know if you get hungry or want something,” Adrien pulls up the LadyBlog. “I’ll just be online, maybe get some homework done.”

“Such a goody-two shoes.” Plagg says like Adrien isn’t now completely distracted. Like he doesn’t want to do homework but he needs to think about something else. Something else so his chest doesn’t feel so shaky anymore.

It shouldn’t be like that. Not when he has three all-powerful kwamis curled up around him, but it takes him much too long to get through a single assignment. Constantly petting and talking to the kwamis, constantly reaching out to them.

 

His bodyguard won’t stop glancing at him.

Adrien’s fighting every instinct he has not to fall asleep in the limo simply to prove that he has the energy to go to school. The doctor claims that there’s no disease or illness affecting him, and says that what Adrien describes sounds like overtraining. So Father immediately pulled him from fencing and his savate classes.

A dance teacher will be coming in though, simply to keep his time filled apparently and have him do mild exercise, so there’s that, he supposes. It’s likely because Gabriel’s getting custom orders from rockers and singers and Adrien might have to emulate some of that, but whatever. He can’t really seem to care about it.

Adrien’s focused on the now. Proving that he feels better. Sure, tired. But otherwise fine. And after transforming into Chat Noir with some money to buy more painkillers, he’ll be ready for the akuma that Hawk Moth inevitably sends out today.

Adrien is more than capable of using his brain! And he’s got three kwamis always on the lookout to tell him when something’s happening. He’s got this!

He is so not spending another hour sitting in his room spinning in circles of what happened on Monday and he needs to talk about it with Ladybug but he can’t even think about it without that shaky desperate feeling digging into his chest and then just babbling on with the kwamis as a constant reminder that they’re all safe and everything’s fine and no one is taking them away from him.

He can’t do that anymore, so he can do this!

“I can’t do this,” He whispers it to the three kwamis after just one of his afternoon classes, utterly exhausted down to the bone as he resists the temptation to lean against his locker.

Just like how he couldn’t talk to Ladybug- they spent most of yesterday’s patrol helping Carapace and Rena with some moves and then chasing Mr. Damacles around and other ‘new’ heroes- and they were just so tired that Adrien thought he could but then he stuttered and dissolved and didn’t. It’s fine though. He can do it later. When he sees her tonight.

Once he can control his own thoughts. Once he can say words again.

“Cheer up, my King!” Pollen beams at him, “All those around you were excited to see your healthy return!”

Plagg snorts, “Yeah, no, you’re gonna die.”

“But it’s so exciting here!” Gigga exclaims, “The entire purpose is just to learn!”

“Thank you, you’re right.” Sarcastic or sincere depending on the listener, and gratefully opens his locker to gorge on his snacks-

An explosion ripples through the air. The akuma alert going off on his phone only moments later.

He hates Hawk Moth.

And he can’t even tell Ladybug now because she also has school and there’s just no time.

 

“Adrien,” Nathalie intercepts when he tries to get up for school the next day, “I cannot allow you to leave.”

Swallowing, since he was awake this time Father was in the room while he got checked out by a doctor, and he doesn’t feel all that awful to go back to school again. It’s only after an akuma fight he gets to the point where people think he needs to go back home.

Besides, he already took a painkiller in advance today! He can get through at least one school day.

And he’s really got it easy, he didn’t even have to deal with the post-akuma press yesterday. Or, slightly more accurate, he used them to get away and abandoned his team. Yet now everyone knows he’s Dard Noir for the time being. Which Hawk Moth would have known that anyway from Guitar Villain.

And Ladybug told him to not come to last night’s patrol and just rest, so he’s completely fine. He’s okay. And he really needs to show up so he can talk to her. He can manage to think about Monday without immediately needing to grab onto Plagg to ward off all the shaky realities telling him what would have happened if he failed. So, he can talk to her now. Probably. But he can put it off a little bit to get to know Gigga and just relax before having to change and mess with everything again.

Once he tells Ladybug about Gigga, she’ll probably want to take their miraculous for safekeeping like she’s done the others. Maybe he can keep Gigga though. He’ll keep them safe. And if Gigga’s here that means it’s impossible for anyone else to have access to their miraculous and then no one can hit him with stupefy and he also has Pollen too and no one can ever stun him again and take any of the kwamis. They’ll all be safe with him and he’ll be safe with them and that’s honestly so perfect so why would he want that to change at all?

So, yeah, he can safekeep Gigga. This is fine. He’ll tell Ladybug another time. Just another time when he’s better with the ring or comb or just better and this can’t happen. Where it’ll be impossible for anyone to ever threaten this life or the kwamis. When no one can take anything from him.

“Please Nathalie? I don’t want to get behind, and I can at least manage a half-day.”

“Your father was quite clear.”

“Please!”

“You should focus on the work that you missed earlier.”

“Ah!” Adrien perks up. In his face. His body still refuses to pump out any extra energy despite how he just woke up. From a nap. Since he had a couple nightmares last night. “I completed all of it. So I’m more than capable of going to school. I’ll excuse myself from PE, and uh, when I come back for lunch I’ll take more medicine or not go back at all depending on how I’m feeling.”

Nathalie’s lips twitch a bit up, “Are you negotiating with me?”

Adrien gives her a sheepish smile back, “Well, is it working?”

“You may go, but,” Her eyes go hard, “If you collapse again, you are not going back for the rest of the week. The doctor told us that not giving your body enough rest will lead to other conditions. Please don’t push yourself.”

“Of course, and I really do think I’m getting better.” Or at least, he will, in a couple of days. Probably. “But you have my word I’ll call you for a pick up if I’m not feeling well.”

At her nod, Adrien just tilts his head enough into Plagg to butt heads and lifts his shoulder to nuzzle Pollen and strokes Gigga to where they’re latched on his forearm again. Success!

Not that his classmates see it that way. Not when they don’t know how awful it is to be stuck in his room, carefully hidden from threats and scared but hating that such things affect him at all and wanting to prove that it’s okay and-

And he just can’t be in his room. He can’t be still.

“Adrien,” Rose comes up to him, a frown on her face. “Are you sure you should be back?”

“Yeah,” Juleka mumbles, “You didn’t come back yesterday and maybe you should take it easy.”

Nathaniel nods behind her.

Adrien shrugs, “That was sorta me related. Father wanted me to do a photoshoot later and wanted me to rest beforehand.”

“Wow, he’s a real piece of work to make you still do work.” Alix snorts, and well, maybe Adrien shouldn’t have thrown his Father under the bus. It’s not actually his fault that Adrien was active and then got too tired to come back.

“Dude!” Kim pops up behind him, a frowning Alya in tow. “You sure you should be here?”

Rose nods rapidly. “That’s what I’ve been saying!”

“Guys, guys,” Holding his hands up and backing away, Adrien smiles at all of them. “I’m good. Really. Great even. I’ll see you all in class, I’ve got to go turn in my work.”

Turning around, a little relieved but mostly sad that no one follows him to keep pestering him about it. Though he can hear their whispers, questions about his health, rumors basically, always so many rumors about him. But, whatever, it’s easier to keep himself upright and poised when he can feel eyes on him. Adrien knows how to handle that. It’s familiar. It’s almost nice how familiar it is.

He doesn’t pause going up the stairs, proving that he’s getting used to Pollen’s miraculous by pulling some of that strength into him. Or it proves that he’s not being entirely truthful to Ladybug since he uses destruction to force that to be easier. That trick he figured out while with Wayzz absolutely necessary to get him through this.

It’s hard to believe, that just last week, he felt stronger than he ever had. Before Puppettear and Simon Says and then that fucking bastard who tried to take Plagg. To shut him away for his own purposes and treat him like some object rather than-

“You are a strong warrior, my King.” Pollen nods as he straightens up and breathes before walking into his homeroom.

He lifts the shoulder to nuzzle her to show he appreciates it. After Plagg developed the ability to sleep all through school, it’s quite nice for Pollen and Gigga to still pay attention and ask him questions. He wishes he wasn’t so tired yesterday so he can answer their questions, usually by writing it out in Chinese in the margins and crossing it out to be sure no one else sees, but he’ll do his best today!

Nino, from the very moment Adrien sits down, is looking at him. It’s obvious, not only in the way Pollen asks him why his partner (he probably should have clarified or wrote it a bit different, but he can’t really bring himself to change the way Pollen, and now Gigga, references Nino) keeps looking at him like that, but because the side of his head is burning.

“Nino…” Adrien keeps his gaze on his tablet, slowly working through a math problem as most of his attention keeps going towards his deskmate. “Is there something you’d like to say?”

At his continued silence, Adrien turns to him with a raised eyebrow. Where Nino isn’t even trying to hide the fact he’s staring at him, fully turned at him with a heavy concentrated look. Nino doesn’t even look so focused in science.

“You’re sick.”

“No, I’m not. The doctor said-”

“And you’re still at school.”

“Where else would I be?”

“Are you even a teenager?”

Chuckling, Adrien brings his knee up on the bench to fully face Nino. “I’m being very rebellious right now, you know.”

“No.” Nino’s face flattens. “You’re being an idiot.”

“Oh really?” With a smirk, Adrien leans closer. “I’m a fool?”

Nino straightens, his face breaking slightly as Adrien slides closer still. “Well, yeah, yes. You are. ‘Cause, like, you could be playing video games or- or- uh, dude?”

“I think…” Adrien drops one of his hands down, covering Nino’s and squeezing. “There are plenty of good reasons to a be a fool.”

It’s usually quite difficult to see Nino blush, only just the general darkening of his skin, and Adrien grins further into his space when he gets to see the detail of it. Relishing in watching his boyfriend dissolving in front of him. It’s, well, it’s a surprisingly satisfying sensation, like a warm zing pinging in his muscles.

“Adrikins!” Giving one last grin at Nino after Chloe’s yell, he straightens to turn at her. Pollen perking up as to face her. “I can’t believe you’re at school!”

Sighing, Adrien rolls his eyes. “C’mon, Chlo, I’m okay. Really.”

The look she gives him makes him consider proving he’s okay somehow. But he really can’t unless he uses the miraculous to give him extra strength. Which, god, even the thought of it makes his stomach squirm. Even the idea of using the ring sends a dull aching pulse up through his arm.

Suddenly, Adrien does feel tired. Exhausted, really. He doesn’t want to be here and do this, fending off comment after comment about whether or not he should be here. But he doesn’t want to go back home constantly being monitored and stuck there in a room too big and just waiting for an akuma to try and ruin someone’s day. Waiting and waiting for disaster to strike.

He doesn’t want to be out in the streets either. Oh no, not unless he’s transformed with Plagg or has the whole team with him. No way. There’s people out there and maybe one of them have a lost miraculous and will try to steal the kwamis and maybe he won’t be able to see them in time and he can’t lose any of them. He refuses.

So he’d rather be here. Rather be out than stuck, unable to do anything except feel this pain. He wants to see Nino and his friends, is it really so much of an ask to just do that? To just exist here? Like a normal person?

“Father cut almost everything else anyway, so…” He smiles at the two of them, “Why not try to squeeze out as much time with my friends until I get better?”

Nino snorts, “So you are milking this, in such a you way.”

“Alright, but!” Chloe slams her hand on the table glaring at him, “You push yourself and I will get you to leave this school. You got that Agreste?”

Adrien nods- he’s heard from Mylene that Chloe once set off the fire alarm to get out of school- and while he thinks Chloe is a more adjusted and empathetic person, he doesn’t really want to test to see if she would do that for his sake.

“Alright, class,” Miss Bustier pauses as she looks at Chloe, who huffs and moves back to her seat. “Let’s get ready, shall we?”

They all begin to shuffle, and Nino nudges him as he leans in to whisper. “I’ll totally break into your room if your dad tries to lock you up in there while you’re sick.”

Adrien huffs, rolls his eyes as if that doesn’t make him feel all warm and sappy, “Yeah, what about school?”

“Screw school,” Nino smiles at him, leaning into his side a little more and Adrien just about completely melts.

They hold a smile for a few seconds before Miss Bustier calls for their attention.

 

Adrien’s grinning as they walk out of their last class of the day. “And you were worried.”

“I make no apologies, but,” Nino punches his shoulder, “if I knew you could pull off charming the teachers to be easy on you, I wouldn’t have said a word.”

“Hey, I gotta keep surprising you somehow.” Adrien knocks him with his shoulder in return. “Besides, I still have the rest of the day to relax and play video games.”

“Cool-”

“Come on along kids,” Mr. Damacles hovers at the side of the door, gesturing them along. “Glad to see you feeling better Adrien, but I have to close up.”

Nino rolls his eyes as they walk out, though does fiddle with his miraculous. “Anyway, so, can we finally play something together? I’ve got these new weapons in-”

“Nino! You’re almost done with Skyrim!” Or at least the main quest line. No one can ever really be done with the game.

“Pssh, we can do that when you need to practice piano or something. Let’s game together dude!”

The idea of actually having to focus and stress and play sounds… tiring, but Nino’s smiling at him and looks excited-

“Alright,” Adrien grins at him. “I’ll beat you in that game too.”

Nino rolls his eyes, pausing next to the limo. “Dream on. I actually have a chance at this game since you’ve never really played before.”

“You do know my reflexes don’t suddenly reset because it’s a new game.”

“Let me have some hope!”

Chuckling, Adrien smile falters slightly at the desire to wrap Nino up in a hug. He can’t. Not with his bodyguard right there. Yet with Nino smiling at him and looking so happy, who’s been handling wearing the miraculous and doing it well, Adrien just wants to hug him before they part for the day.

Adrien settles for throwing one arm over him, rolling his eyes and patting his shoulder before it potentially gets too long and he has to face his bodyguard. “Good luck with that.”

Nino huffs, smiling and eyes darting down to the ground. “Yeah, well, anything can happen.”

“Bye, Nino, see you later.”

“See ya dude,”

Once Adrien gets in and they pull away, he sighs up to the ceiling. Smiling even as his eyes begin to shut. “Today was good…”

“I’m glad you think so my King,” Pollen nuzzles up against his neck and relaxes. “I definitely had fun.”

Plagg grunts an agreement into his hair as Gigga nods while muttering tiredly about all the things they learned, and then Adrien’s rather confident that all four of them fall asleep before his bodyguard even makes the first turn.

 

“YES! Ha! That’s what I’m fucking talking about!”

There’s a brief yell in the background- Adrien knows Ms. Lahiffe is saying something along the lines of “Language!” at her son- but that doesn’t stop Nino from cheering as Adrien looks on at his LOSER screen.

“Don’t get too comfy, I call a rematch.”

“Doesn’t even matter. I have this win. I will forever have this win. Nothing can ever take this away from me.”

Adrien snorts, “Why don’t you take a picture then?”

“Well maybe I will- hey-”

His screen glitches out to black suddenly, only showing a type of evil mask, and someone doing an evil laugh and starting to explain their evil plan about evilly killing animals.

“Seriously?” Adrien groans, “Another akuma? Hasn’t Hawk Moth ever heard of a day off?”

“Hey, you saw it… Chat Noir is now temporarily Dard Noir.” Nino clears his throat. “Even with help, Hawk Moth is trying to capitalize on that.”

“He can’t even get the ring if Chat Noir isn’t using it,” He grumbles.

Well, Hawk Moth totally, 100% can since Adrien hasn’t taken it off. Adrien refuses to take off a single miraculous even though Pollen has expressed worries about carrying so many when he’s got too much destruction in him and the barriers might not hold. But nope. Not taking off a single one. Not that he or anyone else would know that because he can’t let them know, make himself a bigger target. And he was hoping that since there hasn’t been an akuma, Hawk Moth realized that it isn’t worth it to send akumas without the ring in play. Adrien was quite enjoying his day.

And the less akumas means less chances for Adrien to have to use the ring in an emergency and then it’d be so much more difficult to talk to Ladybug if she learns that Adrien hasn’t quite been listening to her when he said he would.

And he will talk to her. Over the weekend. He’s not so rattled anymore. He still can’t think about too long, and he’s still getting nightmares about it, but he’s always had nightmares. It’s fine, he can say something now.

“I’m sure he wouldn’t mind another miraculous in the meantime. Anyway, hm, what’s up Mom?”

Adrien rolls his eyes, at least Nino isn’t as awful with lying. Adrien would know something’s up with how he can’t even hear a murmur of her reply, but it’s not like Nino knows that.

“Hey, so sorry dude, I have to go and-”

“No sweat,” Adrien sighs, “I should probably catch up on work in the meantime. Text me when you’re free though, yeah?”

“Of course! I need to beat you again!”

“In your dreams maybe,” Chuckling, Adrien gets up to stretch. “Bye Nino.”

“Bye, can’t wait to see you tomorrow.”

“Yeah,” Adrien sighs and smiles, “Can’t wait.”  

Pollen’s eating away at crackers and jam, at least she’s not so picky about not getting her preferred choice of flavor, and he pulls out some cheese for Plagg and then spicy jerky- Gigga has no preferred food only trying exotic flavors- that makes his nose wrinkle. Plus, taking a quick drink of water and shoving a protein bar in his face, his body is probably somewhat fine to do this.

But, because he is getting checked on pretty frequently, he does run the shower. It’s a horrible waste of water, especially if this fight drags on, but at least no one will wonder where he is if they do a surprise checkup.

“Pollen, buzz on!”

Plagg snorts at him once the powers finish settling over him. “Still can’t get over how stupid you look.”

“Shove off,” Adrien jumps and swings out into the city. Since, even though he still feels pretty awful, it’s better than before. Definitely better than yesterday. Even with the miraculous, towards the end of that fight he could barely make his limbs respond. It’s not great right now, but at least this isn’t a two-akuma kinda day.

Sure, he cheats by using the ring, but he can’t imagine that erased all their efforts so far in cleansing him. Or rather giving his body a longer period to adjust. Adrien doesn’t want to be cleansed. Plagg’s stuck with him. He doesn’t ever want to be separated from him. And if Plagg does some day want to go, then they’ll truly work on it. But nothing is taking Plagg out by force. Unacceptable.

But now he’s using the bee miraculous, won’t dare try to fight the akuma in close combat, and there’s no way that Ladybug and Rena aren’t also on their way.

“I’m glad I swung by tonight,” He grins at Ladybug as he syncs up with her swings. “You know how much I love to hang out with you.”

She rolls her eyes back at him with a playful smile, “And I really could have done without hearing that.” Ladybug taps at her ear as they round a corner. “We’re all on comms, heading to the stadium. Rena says that the bus hostage thing is fake. Carapace and I are going to directly confront with you two in the back.”

He nods and pulls himself to start running over the roofs. It’s still super awkward, especially since he’s trying to focus on pulling the little device out of the stinger. But while he may stumble once or twice, Adrien doesn’t fall. So he’ll count that as a win.

“Stay right where you are!” The voice booms as he approaches the stadium. “Any closer and I hit the button!”

“Come on dude! What those animals ever do to you?”

Adrien lands next to Rena, whispering, “You see their akuma?”

“Might be his tool belt… he’s got a lot of weapons.”

“If you’re a real superhero you’d never endanger innocents!”

Adrien leans towards her. “Why’d they have to be real?”

“We think he has some goggles for heat signatures.” Rena huffs and glares down at the akuma. Which, relatable, it sucks when Hawk Moth learns how to work around their powers. “I’m not good enough to put those in my illusions.”

“You’ll get there,” Adrien pats her shoulder before grabbing his stinger, “Cover this.”

She nods and holds her flute up, “Mirage.”

“Venom.”

He flings it forward, hoping that this will hit immediately and then they can break the akuma without this fight being awful. Maybe they’ll even get back before the sunset. It’ll give him a chance to relax before having to go to dinner at least.

The stinger bounces off the armor. Because of course it does.

“Spilt!”

They take off in opposite directions, and as much as Adrien would love to engage with the akuma to see just what weapons they can and can’t use, he instead swings his way into the stadium to land next to Ladybug and swings the stinger until it’s a blur of yellow. Rena joins them in the next moment, flute up.

Numbers are good, numbers mean less pain.

“Come on then Dark Owl!” Ladybug swings her yoyo, the team lit up pink and yellow from their weapons. “We’re gonna show you what real superheroes are made of!”

“With pleasure!”

This Dark Owl throws multiple gadgets as two robot drones detach from their shoulders as they fall. Shoot, that means there’ll be too many targets for Carapace to trap. And they’re going much too fast for him to focus on them anyway.

“Surround him!”

Ladybug flips over the akuma, Carapace and Rena splitting off to go for the sides, and he charges forward. It may be wrong of him, by a lot, but he hopes that the akuma doesn’t put all their attention on him.

Adrien should have known, the moment he threw his stinger thinking that it could be done with soon, that he isn’t going to get good things with this fight.

The Dark Owl isn’t on Anansi levels of skilled fighting, but they’re also higher up than the average akuma too. Which means he’s back to dodging and trying to be enough of a distraction for the other heroes to do some serious damage. Since every time he tries to get a kick in, they aren’t enough to go through that stupid armor.

At least he and Ladybug have figured out that their weapons are really annoying in the fact that they can pull down boomrangs and the other weapons so Carapace can trap them. But other than that, they aren’t much of a dent. Not when Dark Owl seems to have endless gadgets. And the clones Rena’s brought up only make him hesitate slightly when he can see through the lack of heat.

“Oof!” Carapace coughs before rolling back onto his feet. “No offense dude, but I really wish you had your cataclysm right about now.”

“Yeah,” Plagg gloats, “That’s cause I’m better.”

“It does seem to be the better option.” Gigga hums, “I couldn’t find a single opening on the armor.”

Huffing, he throws his stinger to hold back one of the Dark Owl’s punches against Rena. Wrapping the end of the string around his arm so that he can actually stop that arm by using most of his body. “You and me both, buddy.”

“You pesky instinct!” Dark Owl jerks his arm and starts spinning, and Adrien goes flying towards Ladybug and Rena. They both scramble out of the way as Adrien whirls faster and faster around, his enhanced eyes struggling to make out anything.

Not that Adrien cares about that, focusing on how his innards are stretching and his heart pants inside to get his blood moving.

Whatever physics working on him right now makes it downright impossible to reach for the arm beginning to fiercely burn as the string cuts into his suit. If he at least had claws, then Adrien might have just been able to cut the darn thing rather than having to deal with thoughts or having to try and pull his muscles to undo this.

His back explodes- all the air in his lungs forced out as his chest crumples. That… that was some hit.

Adrien yanks on the bee miraculous. The ring is crackling green as he scrambles and runs, throwing his stinger with no real heat but just to distract the akuma, but he can’t pull on it much. He tried to do that yesterday during the second akuma and the miraculouses don’t mix, he can only manage a small string of destruction before it’ll backlash on him.

It hurts though, and he can hear it beeping on his head as he rejoins the fight. Like every hair on his body has a small insect on it yanking and pinching on the skin.

But he has experience- he switches his breathing, forcing it deep and focusing on letting the power flow through him- with his body beginning to reject the miraculous. But when Rena’s starts to beep, the clones she’s made losing their definition, then Carapace’s as he throws out another small shellter to cage one of the drones.

“M’lady!” Adrien hisses, rushing forward to help Nino as he directly engages. “We need to figure out where his akuma is!”

Since, sure, it could be in the belt, or mask, or goggles, or any part of his armor or maybe underneath the armor. They need to end this quickly, even if it exhausts Ladybug to make a charm like this. Too many of them are getting exhausted and-

“Lucky- ahh!”

Adrien spares a half-second look, a shipping container has snatched up Rena and Ladybug, and the Dark Owl is pressing his advantage onto both of them. If he was just Chat Noir instead-

His chest crumbles when his foot gets tripped up by a boomerang, the hit rattling him. He seethes- it took Anansi levels of strength to start getting him like this as Chat Noir- but he pulls himself up because he can hear Nino struggling and he can’t just be down when Ladybug and Rena are trapped. He can’t let the Dark Owl snatch his miraculous.

“Pollen!” He screams it out, both to impose his will and desire out towards her despite the pain prickling and stabbing all throughout him and to distract the akuma for Carapace to roll back. He screams it, trying to drown out the surge of power in his body that makes him want to retreat and take it back and not go through with this.

“Stinger out!”

Adrien screams again. He can feel the crack, a smash splitting his head open, then the swarm that explodes out from the miraculous. The stinging and pulling and biting burrowing from his skin down to his muscles and scratch at his bones. The transformation isn’t even shifting correctly and Adrien yanks on the ring, destruction, to try and ease the way.

“Kit!” Plagg butts his shoulder, and Adrien doesn’t think- he can’t think with the pain blinding and the typhon of ringing and buzzing biting into him- and rolls with the motion. Feeling the thud of the earth from where the akuma landed.

“Huling!” Gigga screeches, “Duck!”

“You can’t do this with Pollen!” Plagg yells, the ring crackling with his eyes as Adrien adjusts to the transformation. “You’re tearing yourself apart! Switch to me!”

But Adrien can’t do that. Not now. He can’t detransform without the huge risk of his identity getting exposed or not passing out or keeping the miraculous safe. And he can’t let the miraculous be vulnerable like that. Not with an akuma right there. They could be taken!

So he pulls on the ring, shreds the barrier stopping Pollen from completing the transformation, and goes just about blind as his eyes burst with colors.

“Carapace!” He rushes the Dark Owl, ignoring the constant trill from the miraculous, and flexes his hands as claws. Black and yellow tips growing and swarmed with a yellow light that’s dancing all through his arms. “Use your shellter to cut through the container.”

He can hear the murmurs of Rena and Ladybug through the comm, she must have called the Lucky Charm for a solution and needs to decipher it. If he can just take care of the Dark Owl while they do that, then they can just be done with this fight.

Adrien’s never felt lighter, never felt this fast, spinning and kicking and dipping and jabbing. Springing out to dodge the punch that he can see coming- not necessarily slow but as if there was some rope pulling back on him- flipping back to land on his hands and pushing forward to kick forward. Wrapping his legs around his head and scratching at the mask for any give that he can find before dropping down the akuma’s back before any hands or gadgets try to peel him off.

“Whoa,” Gigga flies next to him as Adrien slides into a crouch, taking a moment to breath and shove the rising nausea and weight of disgust swirling with the biting pain. “That was cool.”

Sure, but Adrien’s never related more to a glass dagger than he does now. Sharp and deadly but so, so fragile too.

Adrien smirks at Gigga before launching himself back at the owl, throwing his arm up and sending his claws flying out as barbs. They buzz with Pollen’s yellow light, hitting the gadgets where they fall instantly, and new ones growing out his fingers.

He kinda thinks his fingers might break under the pressure. But that’s not important. He can still move his fingers.

“Kit!” Plagg’s hissing alongside him, “You’re stretching yourself too thin!”

“The akuma isn’t here!” Ladybug gasps. “Okay, once Carapace gets us out, I’ll race to the object. You three keep Dark Owl busy.”

“I’m on my last legs here-”

“You?” Nino huffs, “This is going to be my sixth shellter!”

“Well it hasn’t happened yet!”

“I- I just-”

“Ladybug! Rena!” Adrien spits out, jumping from a kick and scrambling to twist from the grappling hook. “Just get to a side so he can make a small circle out on an end!”

“It’s the making of it that’s the problem!” Carapace throws back. “I can’t-”

Adrien grits his teeth, ignoring the conversation as he keeps fighting and Ladybug encourages him. Ignoring Plagg’s and Gigga’s comments about it too. He just needs to keep Dark Owl occupied. Just a little longer. Just a little longer.

“SH-SHELLTER!”

Nino screams it out, and Adrien pivots towards him- he’s taken a knee and the miraculous is flashing bright and loud- and only sees the pale small shellter at the end for a second before it fizzles out while he’s throwing more claws at the boomerang going for Carapace. Ladybug thankfully explodes out from it, only a brief red blur as she rockets away.

“Huling! The other drones are free!”  

“Rena!” Adrien jumps and smashes one, barely dodging another attack and fumbling his landing. “Take Carapace and get out of here!”

She smashes a drone, “But- ah!”

Adrien huffs, digs his claws into the ground and pulls and pushes to get himself to her. She’s kicking and thrashing- her necklace also a bright flashing point- as Dark Owl holds her and a drone tries to snatch her miraculous. Carapace isn’t faring much better, smashing what drones he can but his movements are too sluggish to keep up.

Hopefully Ladybug doesn’t have to go far.

“Go!” He screams as he throws himself at the elbow of the akuma, Rena spinning with a kick to get herself out. “Get Carapace and go!”

She doesn’t argue this time, and Adrien hears them get away. Or maybe he just can’t hear that well anymore- it’s all ringing and thumping- to know. But Plagg or Gigga would tell him if there’s an issue.

“Kit!”

Adrien sidesteps a boomerang, ducks a punch. Tries to listen at the same time.

“There are drones that are following the turtle and fox!”

Which is bad, if they don’t notice and their identities are seen and Ladybug really needs to go faster. But he spins and braces to jump after-

“AH!” A hand grabs his arm. There’s an awful crunch and the whole limb goes white-hot. And Adrien fumbles and jerks as he’s yanked back to the akuma, another arm coiling over his back that squeezes and squeezes and he can’t move. He can’t move!

“KIT!”

“NO!”

He has to take control of this situation. Dark Owl has all of it and he can’t have that. He can’t lose Pollen! Plagg! Gigga! He can’t lose any of them!

“POLLEN! HELP!” Adrien yells, wheezes really, as he swivels his head to try and delay this as much as possible. He can’t really pull more from the ring, but he has destruction in him. He did this with Wayzz kinda, and okay, maybe he’ll take some more from the ring despite whatever recoil because he needs more power right now!

Nothing is taking these miraculous! Not now! Not ever again!

His vision goes yellow. His body expands, he definitely throws up at some point with the buckling rolling through his chest, and his back is going crazy as a million bugs bit all within him and yank and yank.

“Agh! Pesky bug!”

The grip loosens- the grip loosens- and Adrien throws himself out. Every limb bursting. Every limb, including the suddenly bright and agonizing muscles on his back that then pull and push and row and cramp but move.

And Adrien moves too. Shooting straight up into the sky.

“AHH!”

He freezes up in shock, and then screams some more as he peddles wildly in freefall. Freefall with the bones in his arm grinding against each other and shrieking when he doesn’t have his baton to catch him or even the stinger just these- these-

The muscles, when Adrien spots the grappling hook fired at him again, jerk and flutter again and Adrien darts away. Fumbling through the air and jerking up and down and to the side and definitely throwing up again as the yellow glimmer in his eyes gets so much worse as he crashes and rolls into the ground.

He wheezes there, trying to push himself up only to collapse on his arm and stumble upright before crashing down again.

Thankfully, the akuma starts screaming. It’s over.

Adrien flings an arm out, releasing all the claws out and one must hit since the screaming stops. And then he sees a flurry of red wash over him, with that and the yellow and fuzzy pain exploding up from his arm and body and back and everything leaking out over his eyes, he can’t see anything. Certainly can’t hear anything as he wheezes and heart pounds and the miraculous is trilling and he needs to- he needs to get up so he can leave. He needs to detransform.

Get up. He has to get up.

Instead he chokes on his own breath. Instead of digging his hands into ground they shake and twitch and he can’t. His muscles slipping out from his grasp and he tries to open his mouth to breath but everything is so far gone but it still hurts and he- he can’t- he just, he can’t grab onto anything and-

Everything goes white.

But then he can breathe. His arm swells and then crashes into numbness. Everything’s shaking, his heart wobbles in his chest or maybe that’s his lungs but all the fierce biting and yanking- even the torture on his back- dials down into a rash type burn everywhere.

He can breathe though. His ears are ringing and he can’t really move and his sight is filled with yellow and black and purple fuzzy explosions but he can breathe. So he just lays there and breathes and tries to ignore his body.

“Kit?”

“My King! Adrien!”

“What’s wrong with you? Get up!”

Adrien partly wishes his ears are still ringing too much for him to hear the panicked cries of the kwamis around him. Which is wrong and selfish but he if could cry he would be but his body’s still too far away for that. Much too far away for how he wants to curl up and shut the entire world out.

“Conceal!”

There’s a different sensation that blankets over him. It’s wispy and fleeting but there, like some kind of stubborn mist, and Adrien peels his eyes open with only white and yellow stinging his sight and his head lolls and rolls as his muscles refuse to tense up.

“Shit, shit!” There’s a thump, and then he’s getting rolled onto his back. A sharp flare bursts, and he tries to wince but he’s still just trying to breathe above everything else. “Chat? Chat, can you hear me?”

That’s Rena. It’s not surprising, but her voice doesn’t sound the same with the ringing and buzzing in his ears.

Another thump, stronger this time. “Dude, fuck. Fucking shit. What the fuck?”

“You know,” Rena hisses, “We could use a little more than swearing right now!”

“It’s just-“ Nino stampers, and oh, oh Nino’s upset. That’s bad. He should, he wants to say something. “His body is in shock. It’s… it’s- shit- shit shit-shit-shit-”

There are hands on him, twitching over his chest. His back should hurt, Adrien thinks it will, but it doesn’t. Honestly, he just wants to breathe. He wants to take a deep breath but his chest won’t go up. Just a light push up before it collapses down.

“What’s happening?”

“His heartrate is dropping!”

“What?”

“No!” That’s Plagg. Yelling and yelling and hissing. “No fucking way! You can’t quit on me now Kit! You can’t!”

The ring crackles on his finger, and that feels better. His hand feels more like his hand again.

Something must have gone wrong, he thinks as the screaming and pleads around him mix with the pinging in his body into a mindless din, with the detransformation. Pollen’s transformation always feels like something he has to peel off and maybe some of is still stuck. Like how Plagg is stuck in him. But Plagg’s welcome to stay. Pollen’s welcome to visit. Sometimes.

He always wants her around of course. He never wants her to go. Not ever. Oh no, that’s bad, he can’t have that. But, like, on a back patio or something. Around. Not in. Not all the time.

“I don’t know what’s happening, what’s happening to you, I don’t want anything to happen, please don’t go away, come back…”

Gigga’s muttering in his ears as Adrien tries to focus on the miraculous. Pollen might be crying, sobbing- “I can’t do anything, what can I do? I need to do something but I can’t-” and Plagg’s still shouting. And it’s Plagg. Plagg. Destruction. He needs to- he needs a reset on his system. Which he’d probably need Ladybug for, but he must be able to do something with just Plagg. With just destruction.

He pulls on the ring. His arm snaps with pain and life, and he inhales a great deep breath and-

“Plagg…” He coughs, wheezes. “Purge!”

His next breath catches, his body seizing up- tensing as the bursts of lightning strike through his bones- and fall back into his control. Adrien then slumps there, takes the nicest biggest breath he can, and relishes as everything rightens back up.

“Oh, thank the universe and all the souls,” Pollen’s sighing and weeping. “Thank you Plagg, thank you.”

“You’re getting better!” Gigga chants, “Better! Better! Keep going!”

“Um…” Rena hums, “Should we be worried about that?”

“You seriously want to worry about that? Ladybug can probably fix it anyway.”

“I’m not talking about the black thingies. I’m talking about Mr. Damacles. Who’s still frozen.”

“…that can also be a Ladybug problem.”

“No! We’re going to be full-time heroes now too! We have to be able to handle some things on our own!”

“We’ve been at this for less than a week-”

“I’ve been doing this since October!”

“And I’ve been doing it since December! That doesn’t mean the ‘how to do this shit’ manual drops from the sky!”

“We should be able to handle post-akuma without their help. We’ve been around long enough.”

“Well there’s never been a post-akuma where Ladybug’s not here and Chat Noir literally can’t move at the end of it and was probably going into a seizure- shit, shit, does that leave some effect after? Does he still need to go to the hospital? Shit. Fucking shit man.”

“What’s going on?” Ladybug’s voice enters the swirl of noises around him. “What happened to Chat?”

“I-”

“What happened to Chat?” Ladybug’s voice goes hard, steely, and Adrien needs to say something. Do something more than relish in the cool crackling bringing his body back.

“He- he used the fucking bee miraculous!” Nino shouts, mutters a string under his breath. “Uh, dude- uh, Ladybug, just, this isn’t good. We all know full well that he is supposed to be Chat Noir, he’s so damn good at it, like, come on, and- and this is just bad. All around bad, so, like-”

“This is bad?! He was destroying himself-”

“Is that not what this is?” Rena snaps back, “I get it. I do. I’ve seen what he’s done when he’s pushed the ring but at least he doesn’t go into some type of seizure because of it! You can’t get rid of one poison by handing another!”

“Destruction is true poison. It can’t-”

Adrien inhales, coughs as his body rejects the urge to move. “Hey guys…”

“Dude!” Carapace is right back kneeling next to him. “Hey, hey… uh, dude, you feeling alright? You look a little weird…”

“Better,” Adrien closes his eyes and focuses, allowing more of his powers through him. “More by the second. That was a fucking rough akuma.”

His eyesight is still a little strange- out of focus and yellow fuzzies flickering about- and his body doesn’t feel like his either. Yet it is enough for him to get his elbows underneath him- his arm isn’t broken anymore but that throb didn’t completely go away- and get a general look at everything. From Rena’s tense posture to Ladybug’s defensive one, both of them flicking their gazes at him. Then there’s Nino, Pollen, and Gigga, all just staring at his every move with obvious concern.

“Chat,” Ladybug recovers first, “How are you feeling? I can do another miraculous ladybug if there’s anything still wrong. Maybe a restore.”

“I’m good-”

“No way, stop that shit.” Nino snorts, “His arm is hurting him.”

Adrien squints at Nino, combing through what he knows about Wayzz and then shifts that look over to Pollen. And he isn’t the only one from how Rena’s and Ladybug’s narrowed eyes lock onto Carapace.

“What? It is. It’s- it’s just obvious guys. Since, because-”

“This is a passive ability of Wayzz, though it seems quite weak.” Pollen starts, and Adrien tunes out Nino’s stammering to listen. “This is all very unusual, so I’m not sure how he’s gotten the ability at all, but it’s called concern. It allows the wielder to see the state of being of whatever they wish to protect.”

“How’s it unusual?” He hisses, before clearing his throat to address the team. “Uh, maybe it’s because he’s the miraculous of protection? Seems normal enough.”

Ladybug frowns at him. “So your arm does hurt and you weren’t going to say anything?”

“Uh…”

Pollen clears her throat, “Unusual since you’ve wielded Wayzz, Nino has significant relations with you despite the glamor obscuring his conscious mind, the affect that Plagg may be having in the established magics, and that wielders of the miraculous have never to fight another miraculous all of which may change development.”

“No comment?” Adrien chuckles, forces himself up now that he’s feeling a lot better. “I can still feel a lot of… purging going on in me and I wouldn’t want that to get messed up.”

Ladybug’s frown gets a little deeper-

“He’s being sincere.” Rena’s ears twitch in his direction. “He might not be right, but he is sincere.”

“Nah, he’s right. I’m getting better vibes off him, which…” Nino frowns and glances over at the other two. “I’m not getting anything from either of you-”

“Probably just a me thing then!” Adrien blurts, “Destruction and everything, it can make it easier for powers to develop.”

“And that’s good so when Chat tries to weasel out of taking care of himself you can be right there.” Ladybug nods and then smirks at him, to which he automatically rolls his eyes.

“Barring a few exceptions, I do try to keep myself healthy.”

Rena hums, a smile teasing her lips, “I dunno, seems a little less sincere if you ask me…”

“Oh,” Adrien grins and swats at her, “Don’t go poking things that aren’t there, fox.”

She just grins more, those fangs of hers peeking out as her shoulders loosen, and that’s just a bit more concerning. How tense they all still seem.

“Okay, okay,” Ladybug walks over and takes his arm, “I won’t go messing with anything else, I’ll only focus on the bone. How is it now?”

“Throbbing. I think it’s bruised? Just below the elbow”

“Hey,” Gigga suddenly pipes up. “Below and elbow have the same exact letters in them! In this language at this, since others it wouldn’t be. Which, wow, isn’t that cool?”

Smiling, he gives them a slight nod as Ladybug presses a hand to his arm. There’s a soft pinkish glow, a whispered word “Restore”, and the throb goes away. In fact, a lot of his arm feels better. Which is weird because the rest of him is still extremely tired and the arm not being in sync is just off.

“Okay,” Rena takes a deep breath, nodding to herself a little. “I know I’m not a full hero yet, and I know I don’t have the full picture, but please listen to me when I say that it can’t be healthy or good for Chat to keep using the bee comb.”

Ladybug stiffens, and Adrien does too because he refuses to go through an argument now. Not now. He’s so tired and he wants to go home and sleep and curl up with all the kwamis and not exist for a little while.

No, not home. Everyone knows where his home is. But the hideout. His little pocket of reality that no one can touch.

“I second that.” Carapace’s shoulders hike up when all of their attention goes to him, hands twitching at his side. “Just… uh, well, it seems to be having a nasty physical backlash at him-”

“Because we’re driving out destruction!” Ladybug huffs, throwing her arms out to the side in exasperation. From experience, it’ll only take a minute or two before she starts getting really upset.

“But this only started so bad with the bee!” Rena pushes, “Not even with Simon Says, not even with Anansi, not even with the Sapotis, not even with Copy Cat was it ever this bad!”

Adrien doesn’t know how she knows all that, unless maybe she’s really thorough about all things akuma and them related which might be the case but Nino certainly only would know because he helps with the LadyBlog sometimes with video editing, but he doesn’t doubt it. He’s never seen Rena alight like this. And she’s saying these things with complete confidence, which he wouldn’t believe means sincerity coming from Chloe, but Rena’s proven herself to be very dedicated when she sets her mind to it.

“Ladies-”

Ladybug glances to him, maybe his sight’s still coming back, and her shoulders set back. “You haven’t seen him like I have. Using the ring certainly isn’t helping-”

“I’m just saying that using the bee as an alternative seems to be worse.”

“Hey!” Adrien startles, “Whoa, I would much rather use the bee than get sidelined!”

Which might not be entirely true. It’s so, so very difficult to use the bee miraculous. Maybe not for akumas like Mr. Pigeon, where he can have some fun and not have to press so hard. Yet Hawk Moth is pushing and every time he’s out with the citizens he keeps getting mixed reactions which just sucks and he does want to go back to being Chat Noir again. Where he’s strong and powerful and nothing can take him down.

“Please,” Pollen murmurs, “Don’t do that. Rest instead, Adrien. I- I cannot do- please do not use my miraculous in a fight again.”

Rena huffs, “Yeah, but clearly you’ve just got this new purge power…”

Adrien tunes her out, his ears are catty once again and he has control of sounds, and focuses on Pollen. She’s floating next him, antenna downcast, very clearly not meeting his eyes when he looks towards her.

“Pollen…?” He whispers quietly, gasping when her little frame shudders.

“Hey, hey,” Adrien can feel the attention shift from the others, but he shoves that aside to gently cup Pollen. Gigga also crawling on his forearm, giving him a confused frown and concerned eyes. “Are you alright?”

“Your soul, I will not-” Pollen shudders again, holding her antenna around her body. “It is in turmoil. Stretching and lashing out and I can’t control- I can’t do a thing to keep it from tearing! I cannot help or do- do anything! Please, please my King, do not use my miraculous again.”

“Chat-”

“Rena’s right.” Adrien doesn’t look at Ladybug, only gently stroking Pollen’s fluff with his thumb. “The bee is doing what you want, LB, but it’s also not good for me and Pollen can’t maintain balance.”

 Ladybug sighs, closes her eyes as she gets her concentrated face on. Rena doesn’t relax, though her face soothes, but Carapace does. Nino’s entire body slumping as he rubs his neck.

It strikes him, suddenly, consciously, that Nino’s nonconfrontational. It fits naturally- Adrien can remember Nino raising his voice during filming before Horrificator and maybe Anansi but that wasn’t attacking the akuma as much as helping- but it seems so strange when he has a miraculous. A miraculous to fight akumas.

But it is the miraculous of protection. So, huh, fits.

“Alright, I’ll come up with a new solution with Tikki.” Ladybug puts her face in her hands for a moment, rubbing at her eyebrows before lifting her head. “I’ll take the bee miraculous to talk with Pollen-”

“No!” He flinches, jerks- hands flying to his head as Pollen buzzes loudly and Gigga startles upright. “Don’t touch the comb!”

His heart pounds, and he knows he can outrun them if necessary. Only Ladybug can match pace with him, and he can lose her down in the sewers if he has to-

“Chat?” Ladybug frowns, “Are you okay?”

“Uh…” Because right, this is Ladybug. This is the team. He can trust them, her. She’s not stealing the miraculous. He won’t be losing Pollen. This isn’t… this is fine. Fine. All fine. No theft happening here.

If his heart could calm down then, he’d appreciate that.

“Sorry, uh…” He forces his face into something calm, natural. Slightly embarrassed rather than the panic coiling in his muscles. Pounding in his veins. “Force of habit. The comb… people have wanting to see it more than the ring and it’s weird and like, um, sorry about that.” He pushes out a chuckle, Rena’s definitely probably seeing through this but he is being sincere. “Anyway, uh, what about later? So Plagg and Pollen can say goodbye.”

Ladybug smiles, it’s her calming one and he hates how she needs that for him, “Of course. Sometime tomorrow morning then?”

“Uh, I guess. Yeah.” Adrien chuckles again, terrible impulse but he can’t seem to stop or do something else. “Okay, yeah, yeah, uhm, soooo, I’m going to go. Back home. Rest. All the things. Cat-ch you all later!”

He launches off, using his wonderful baton to get exactly where he needs to go in moments. Back home, tragically. He wants that shower really quick and then to hug all the kwamis and absolutely not sleep so he can appreciate every single second while they’re there.

Anything so he doesn’t have to think about giving up Pollen.

Notes:

One of these days, I'll be able to control on how much I ramble in a chapter. Today was not that day.

Chapter 11: Realities and Nightmares

Adrien can’t breathe.

That’s all he can focus on. He can’t breathe and he can’t move in the slushy rocks pulling him down. There’s no light and he can’t breathe and the rocks are tightening and he can’t breathe and there’s cracking-

“Kit!”

Adrien jerks upright with a gasp, hands flying to his chest. Patting it down as his heart beats and beats and lungs expand and expand before it all collapses back down. There’s nothing there hurting him. It was only a dream. Only a dream. He can breathe, there’s nothing stopping his lungs from pushing back out.

Going through his exercises, Adrien can’t resist the urge to touch the miraculouses on him. The comb, Pollen gently humming as she sleeps on the pillow next to him. The necklace, Gigga’s wrapped around a foot and Adrien’s very glad he isn’t ticklish. The ring.

The ring.

He twists it on his finger, wonders if he can change it more somehow. Not just make the design a little sharper, not just lengthening it, but to tighten it. So that the ring can’t be taken off. That no one can just rip it off ever again.

Not that this last nightmare cared about that. The miraculous simply crumbling from the pressure of the stony liquid.

At least they were going down together though.

“Thanks Plagg,” He brings a hand up to hug the kwami purring and nuzzling his face, scratching lightly behind his ears. “I wasn’t screaming again, was I?”

Plagg purrs louder but shakes his head. “Was it a bad one?”

“Wasn’t a good one,” He mutters, gently easing Gigga onto the sheets before going to his desk to write this one out. “Sorry for waking you.”

“I’d rather wake up here than at that school.” Plagg shudders, “Talk about a real nightmare.”

Adrien huffs, keeping his right hand up with Plagg as he begins to write. Peeling the dream away from his emotions and just into a logical analysis. It’s so obviously not real once he sees the words, once he gets it out of his head. Just shadows and fears playing tricks on him.

Plagg butts harder into his cheek before floating to look at him clearly, “You wanna go run?”

He kinda does. But this wasn’t one of the frantic nightmares, where he wakes up with more energy than what he knows what to do with, he just wants to distract himself. Yet after- quickly checking to see that, yes, it is early the next day- last night’s akuma, Adrien doesn’t want to transform. He did feel better after whatever it is he did with Plagg, but no. No, he just wants to be… normal. For lack of a better term.

“I think I want to head to the hideout. But…” Adrien glances at Gigga. He doesn’t want to doubt them, that he can’t trust them with this secret. Yet they were the kwami with that bastard and Adrien doesn’t want to lose this place. It’s his. It’s his and he can’t stomach the idea of it getting taken from him.

“We lost contact with Gigga for…” Plagg shrugs, “Well I don’t think it’s a long time but for you apes-”

Adrien rolls his eyes and swats at him. “These apes made your precious cheese.”

“Yeah yeah,” Plagg says, but then lights up when Adrien reaches to grab him some. “There was only about a dozen of us that weren’t sent back to the pocket dimension. Gigga, Nooroo, Duusu, Nimmi, Stompp, Rerry, Liiri, Bavve, Olli, Kymmu, and Hinssi, we have no idea what’s happened to them since then. And I’m not the biggest talker, but I do remember them being a little more, well, calm.”

Adrien hums, scratches at his neck and frowns a little. He needs another shower. Maybe he’ll think of something then. Just a way to talk to Gigga. This weekend, for sure, maybe even tonight, he’ll talk to Ladybug about what happened. He doesn’t want to keep this from Gigga, but, if they tell it to Ladybug and then on top of everything else… Adrien just can’t see it going well.

Maybe he can just start with how he’s been documenting his observations, see how they react, and then go from there. He hopes he doesn’t have to talk about their previous wielder. It… Adrien has no idea to go about that conversation and maybe it’s bad to just try and sweep it under the rug. Yet, he doesn’t want to make it worse on Gigga and if they’re happy like this… then okay. He’ll just let it lie then. Maybe he can throw out how he’ll listen if they want to talk, at least being open for Gigga, but he doesn’t know much more than that.

“Alright,” Adrien stands, goes through some lackluster stretches. “Imma shower. You want the heating blanket?”

Plagg rolls his eyes. “Obviously. Who do you take me for, a polar bear?”

“Right yeah,” Adrien rolls his eyes back, “Chalk it up to another silly human…” Adrien sighs when Plagg does this shiver thing. That usually means-

“You got a message from Pigtails.”

Looks like he’s transforming then.

Adrien sighs and pulls out some food for Gigga and Pollen before going to wake them up. Out of all the times that he does go on a run after a nightmare this just had to be the time he doesn’t when Ladybug messages him. Oh well, it must be important then.

“Hey,” He shakes them awake, giving a sheepish smile towards Gigga, “I’m about to transform. There’s a cup of Jello on my desk.”

Gigga perks right up and zooms off. “Ooh! Thank you, huling!”

Soon, he thinks as he goes towards Pollen, he should also probably ask Gigga what ‘huling’ even means.

Adrien jostles the pillow under her, “Come on, Pollen, I think we’re about to say goodbye.”

“Hmm?” Pollen blinks up at him, frowns, “Now?”

“Yeah… Ladybug messaged. But I got some jam for you.”

“Oh,” Pollen flies up and strokes his chin. “I’m really going to miss you. It’s been an honor to be under your care, my King.”

“It’s been an honor for me as well. And hey,” He gives a soft smile and pets her little neck fluff. “This isn’t a permanent goodbye. I’ll convince Ladybug to send you my way soon enough.”  

“I’ll hold you to your word.” She dips a little before zooming towards her food.

Adrien sighs, closing his eyes as Plagg butts his head. He leans into it a little, giving another short sigh, and tries to work up the energy to go out and talk. Again, out of all the times to have an exhausting nightmare… he can’t scrounge up the urge to do anything.

“Alright,” He mutters, scratching Plagg’s ears. “Claws out.”

He opens the window, takes a slow inhale at the cold air, and sits on the ledge. Swinging a leg over the glass and wondering what the stars would look like if none of these lights were here. If he could see more than the vague twinkle of what may just be satellites or airplanes overhead.

Pollen and Gigga crawl on his shoulders, and he gives a quick nuzzle to both of them before rising up on his baton towards the roofs. Which, he could run over, he should, but he just ends up walking over them. Breathing and strolling. Trying to let his thoughts go on every exhale.

“Ooh!” Gigga pokes his neck and points down after enough time. “What’s that?”

“Oh, fast food place.” It’s from America, which means he’s not allowed to eat there. “You want to try some new foods?”

“Yes please!”

Pollen hums, “I suppose it’d be interesting to try more modern foods.”

Nodding, Adrien tips his baton towards the place and slides down. He startles some of the other late night people- all of them used to staying in their bubble and protecting it- and he gives them a wave before stepping in. He’s helped a lot of people at night, and he hates how there might be some who needs his help now, but he just can’t be everywhere. Not tonight.

“Hi,” Adrien steps up once he’s looked over the menu, the two kwamis equally lost. “So can I have… uh, two kit-kat mcflurries, the big tasty, and um… can I just get slices of camembert? Like five of them?”

The employee, who Adrien definitely saw taking a picture of him and he vaguely wonders what that post will look like, gives a slow nod back. “Yeah, uh, I can do that. Is that all, sir? Or, uh, cat?”

Adrien huffs and smiles, “I purr-fur feline.”

He gets a snort for that- a very unexpected one for how their eyes widen- and they poke at their screened registered. “Al-alright. So… I’m sorry, how are you paying?”

Adrien supposes that’s a fair question. It’s not like Ladybug or him have ever been seen with a wallet or other means to carry money. Or have been seen purchasing things in general. Although sometimes people will just give them free things, which Adrien hates because while he appreciates their kindness he wants to pay them, but it might be different for a chain like this.

Adrien pulls out some money from his baton. “Would that be enough?”

“Um, yeah, let me just figure out your change-”

“Keep it,” Adrien shrugs, “It’s fine.”

They stare at each other for a moment, and then they just nod and take it. Soon enough, the receipt comes out- oh yeah, Adrien overpaid, whatever- and he takes his drink and then a straw. He goes through each drink, filling it a bit and then offering it to each of the kwamis.

Gigga is fascinated by the bubbly drinks. Pollen decidedly less so. Not because of the bubbles themselves, but she makes the most confused and disturbed face when she burps.

“So?” He whispers quietly at the last drink. “Verdict?”

“More of the orange one!” Gigga shouts as Pollen decidedly wrinkles her face up.

“Alright,” Adrien fills it up completely, the both of them sipping on it- his baton begins to buzz with messages- before he fills it again and gets a lid. No ice. They don’t need ice. His internal temperature is regulated by the suit anyway.

“Chat Noir! Your order’s done.”

“Nice,” Adrien roots through the bag, eats one of the camembert and tries to will the sensation to Plagg. Then, after taking the burger out, he coils the top of the bag up and shoves it all in the baton for later. Which frees a hand to take the cardboard thing of ice creams. “Thank you. Have a nice night. Morning. Yeah. Have a good one.”

“Um, yeah, uh, uh thank you, and you too.”

Adrien gently jumps his way back up to the roofs. With the way his baton is buzzing, he imagines that Ladybug is hunting down his location now, and he takes a few bites of the ice cream before handing it off to each of the kwamis.

“Huh,” Gigga smacks their lips at it. “Cold.”

“It’s wonderful!” Pollen claims before shoving most of her face into it. Which, yeah, it’s strawberry ice cream base. It’s like a cold creamy jam.

Adrien just lets Gigga drink more of the soda as he sits and then chomps down on the burger. Oof, he’s hungrier than he thought. He’ll have to find something else to eat after this thing with Ladybug. At least he gets to eat the rest of Gigga’s mcflurry then.

“Chat!” Ladybug swings onto the roof, her suit giving off a soft red glow. “Do you have any idea what you’ve done?”

“Uhhh…” He frowns, thinks, uses the trash excuse to busy himself time as he cataclysms it. “No?”

Ladybug huffs, high and loud, and grabs at her pigtails. “No? No! You’ve just released another miraculous! Who knows where it could be now and-”

“Whoa, no…” Adrien stands, slowly, slightly inching away from her. “I haven’t done any catastrophes since Anansi.”

“No, you haven’t.” Ladybug shakes her head, “You just attacked, attacked when that was our shot at fixing everything-”

“Attacked?” Frowning, has there been some other Copy Cat scenario? This, this isn’t making sense and maybe he should have ordered a coffee of some type. Maybe it’s just the early hour that’s making Ladybug more confusing than normal.

She’s pretty pissed though, and Adrien’s upset at that, but he’s so tried too and he just doesn’t quite feel that completely at the moment.

“Destruction incarnated. That’s what he said.” Ladybug begins muttering, shaking her head at the ground and then to the sky. And wait, he’s… he’s heard that before. “He warned me and I said no, no you’re better than that. You’re a good person and you deserved doubt but you- you-”

“Wait-” He’s interrupting. Interrupting as Ladybug’s getting towards a yell which only makes things worse. But- but wait. “What did you just call me?”

“Destruction incarnated!” Ladybug snaps at him, and he glances at Pollen and she- she nods. She nods with wide eyes- She nods and that means-! “And I said no! I told him you wouldn’t be like that and now he’s hospitalized-”

“You know him!” It bursts from him, outraged and shocked. Erupting, painfully, all through him. Toasting the exhaustion into something bristling. “You know him! How- Why- You can’t know him! And you agree with him? How, Ladybug, this is crazy! HE’S crazy!”

“It’s not crazy! Master Fu knows more about the miraculous-”

“He’s a fucking idiot and a bastard that’s what he is!”

“How could you say that?” Ladybug gasps, fists balling up. “Master Fu has taught me so much about balance and control of the miraculous-”

“Taught you?” Adrien hisses, throwing his hands out. Recoiling and planted all at once. “You were taught? Taught after saying no and no and NO! I said we should learn and you shut me down! You-”

“Every time you learned something you used it to hurt yourself!”

“I didn’t have a choice!” Adrien stamps his foot, there’s clattering and cracking all around him and he needs to take a deep breath but Ladybug’s right there. Furious when she’s done- everything- for who knows how long- when he needed help and she didn’t tell him- they’re supposed to be partners- “Would you have preferred those Sapotis creatures overrun us? Style Queen! Anansi! Simon Says was about to kill someone! I nearly watched myself cataclysm someone with Puppettear. And oh, oh let’s not forget fucking Copy Cat who used MY FACE to almost trick you to stealing your miraculous!”

“That’s not fair-” Ladybug starts yelling sometime around ‘Simon Says’ mostly drowned out by his yelling. “That’s not how it went!”

“I had no choice!”

“There’s always a choice!” Ladybug gestures sharply between them. “We’re heroes. We take the harder path and sometimes there’s tough choices-”

“Were these not tough-”

“And we have to think-”

“I didn’t have time-”

“There’s always something with you!” Ladybug scowls. “Always some reason. Always some excuse to do these things. I told you no. I told you were hurting. I told you I didn’t want to see you hurt and then you kept doing it. You didn’t even try to do anything else. You could have retreated- Anansi just had people trapped you didn’t need to engage, same with Dark Owl- or just tried to disorient the akuma rather than immediately going for the most violent approach!”

“Violent? Violent to who? I’ve never hurt anyone!”

“But yourself, and now Master Fu who wanted to bring us to balance because SOMEONE here-”

“Oh,” Adrien scoffs, sarcasm and poison dripping from his fangs. “I hope you aren’t talking about Pollen!”

“You know damn well I’m talking about you!” Ladybug jabs a finger at him. “You! Who kept pulling on destruction without a thought to balance. So I’ve been having to mediate with Tikki every single night this week to bring things back-”

“Oh, your week was tough?” Adrien spits back, teeth crackling. “I’ve gone into seizures! The doctor had to come! I couldn’t even go to school!”

“Out of balance! Destructive! This sounds like what I’ve been saying! What you’ve been ignoring! Pushing yourself to the breaking point-”

“No! NO! It isn’t! It isn’t like that!” Adrien curls over, clawing at his hair and pulling for some anchor because it’s all burning in him and he wants it out. He wants to bash this over Ladybug’s head until she sees. “This ‘Master’ of yours STOLE my miraculous. He STOLE Plagg. Attacked, ripped off, and fled. Do you have any idea what that was like? What he did to me? To Plagg?”

Ladybug flinches, stunned, and Adrien presses. Hissing and stepping forward towards her as the very air and ground begin to clatter and rumble.

“Right after I detransformed. I felt like shit, I could barely stand, and then I get hit with stupefy and can’t make heads or tails about anything. He steals the rings and leaves me on the sidewalk practically passed out and vomiting! And you want to defend this guy! You want me to agree with you? After he tore me apart without so much as a pause!”

“He- he wouldn’t. And you should have come to me! We could have- I would have talked to him and there wouldn’t be violence- he wouldn’t be so hurt-”

“Why would I go to you?” He scowls, “When I can’t even trust you?”  

The night holds that still, where it crackles and buzzes between them. He can feel the devastation echoing back through him- oh god, oh god, is that true? That, no, that can’t be true. They’re, they’re partners, they’re friends, right?- and the air snaps with green and glows red. Ladybug’s trembling in front of him. Blue eyes shining and lips pressed tight in either contained sadness or anger. He can’t tell.

He can’t even tell what he’s feeling. He wants to cry and scream and run and collapse and his heart trills, never relaxing, while his muscles curl in and he doesn’t know what to do because he’s right. But he can’t be right. He doesn’t want to be right, but Ladybug has to be wrong. That guy stole Plagg, everything out of his mouth is bullshit.

Her eyes widen, mouth parting, but then she just shuts down. Face goes steely, as if he’s an akuma trying to rattle her, and takes a step back from him.

“You talk about trust, but what about you, huh?” Ladybug sneers back, “You know the identity of Carapace. You took his miraculous. You experimented and figured out how to use venom at the same time. Every time I said no, please, don’t hurt yourself, you smiled and said ‘of course’ and then turned around and did just that.”

“What would you have me do-”

“Be better! Basically! Think about it a little more than just barreling forward!” Ladybug scoffs, shakes her head. “You think this is, what, a video game? Where you just charge through and use fighting combos and strength to get through? No, we have to think first. We have to be smart. And every opportunity you just choose to fight. Regardless of who’s lives and feelings you were stepping on.”

“I was a little stressed!” His voice crackles- she’s pressing this, she’s pressing this and does that mean, does that mean that she really, no, she, it’s Ladybug. This is his partner. “Pardon me, but I haven’t had any master or teacher to help me out here. That’s why I was trying to learn! To be better!”

“Not enough apparently. You don’t see me in situations like Puppettear or Simon Says or anything-”

“You want to blame me for what Hawk Moth’s doing now too? Say that I’m the reason that the butterfly even got to his hands at all?”

“You can’t even-” Ladybug lifts her head up, not even looking at him anymore and he growls. “Look, you’re a great fighter. It’s why I wanted you to at least have the bee. But now, with what you’ve done, the balance is broken and you can’t use the ring until I’ve stabilized it. But since you can’t use another miraculous and you clearly have no reservations about using the ring despite promising me, perhaps you shouldn’t fight at all.”

“What?” Adrien flinches back, scoffs. “You have to be kidding me. I’m the best fighter of us! You can’t just kick me off!”

“I can’t fight alongside someone I can’t trust!”

“You’ve never been in a fight without me there!” Adrien fires back, “I’ve been involved in every single akuma attack! YOU can’t say the same!”

Ladybug huffs and crosses her arms, “Oh yeah, does the Collector ring any bells?”

Oh, oh god, he WAS there for that. Adrien bristles since he actually played a crucial part in saving her- despite being untransformed and hurt and that was FATHER- and he can’t even say anything because of her stupid rules and stupid secrets and-

“You had help! From civilians! I had NO ONE there for Anansi and Simon Says! I had-”

“You brought in Carapace!”

“As literally a last resort! And at least he had protection going into the fight-”

“Well I certainly didn’t ask any of those people to help me-”

“You would have been caught otherwise!”

“How do you even know that?”

“You want to get into who knows what?” Adrien yells, “Who has the most secrets? Because I sure as hell don’t see myself winning that battle!”

“It was for your own good! Since you clearly couldn’t be in charge of your own wellbeing and-

“How dare you?” He hisses, trembling, throat tightening and the world seems to be shaking and crackling, “I am perfectly capable of taking care of myself. I don’t need you! I don’t need anyone coming into my life and telling me I need help. That I’m not enough!”

Ladybug just scoffs, “Yeah, and where’s your proof of that? Because everything I see, you’re just barely bandaged up.”

“I- I!” Where is his proof? He’s done things on his own before, he has, he must have. Just- but he had Plagg and that was with the class and that was a group project and someone was hired and Felix helped and Chloe shut them down and Ladybug made that plan and he used catastrophe then and-

“Thought so,” Ladybug huffs, “Now, Chat, please, let’s just be done with this. Give me the ring and I’ll find someone else-”

“You can’t do that to Plagg! You can’t do that to me!”

“There’s bigger things going on than just feelings!”

“I made a promise!”

“We need to protect Paris above all else!”

“NO!” He glares at her and crouches slightly, “I already lost him once I am NEVER doing it again! You can’t convince me to give up the ring! To give him up!”

“Chat Noir, you cannot sacrifice all of Paris-”

“I will! I will do anything else but I won’t take this ring off for anyone!”

Ladybug glares back at him, her eyes unmoving and unchanging as she grabs her yoyo. “You can’t have that miraculous any longer. You’ve thrown off the balance of universe. You can’t keep your promises. You can’t be trusted. That ring isn’t your personal security blanket. Give it up.”

Adrien crouches down lower, claws embedding into the roof, and he hisses, “Never.”

Then he takes off, bursting through the city with a speed he’s very rarely felt. He can’t even think really, just heat burning through his heart and muscles. Stretching and spinning and moving and seeing and the world is blurring past. He doesn’t think about what he sees, he doesn’t think about it at all, just absorbing it all and running.

Ladybug’s in hot pursuit. It’s obvious in the zing of her yoyo and the creak of metal as she swings around corners and snaps forward. He can even see what she must look like in his head. Graceful and deadly, determined and powerful.

He’s always been in awe of her, so happy and thankful they’re on the same side. That they’re friends.

His breath catches and he squeezes his eyes shut for just a second against the sudden blurriness and launches himself off the next roof and the next. Taking turns he knows will be hard for her, trying to stay in the dark as much as possible until he can eventually lose her. Doing everything she’s told him that she hates when akumas do it.

His feet skid across metal roofing, claws screeching as he digs them in to compensate and push to twist and turn.

Stop thinking, he has to stop thinking. He can’t think. Just run. On the clattering of tiles and the lines of light and shadows and where to go next. No thinking. He can’t do this and think at the same time.

Launching forward, he grabs a lamp post to spin him around and-

Ladybug’s swinging towards him-

Using his baton, he extends it to the wall and throws his body against the wall. Thankfully not hitting a window, managing to get all his hands and feet on the wall and the springing forward and leaping back up to the roofs. Ears pricked past his panicked for the zing of the yoyo-

Which is too far away for how she was right there and still far away for how he sees her in the side-

He grabs something small and hard from a roof- broken tile or something- and chucks it. The illusion breaking as he continues to sprint across the city.

Rena’s here now too. Ladybug must have sent out a message and of course they’d be with her. She’s Ladybug and he’s just the scary, out-of-control black cat that’s breaking apart and must be handled. Always needing to be handled.

A new burst of terror and speed erupts, his heart stuttering and then trilling high and frantic, and he needs to get out of here. He needs to hide away before Carapace- before Nino- gets here and he can’t- Adrien just can’t do anything to him and he can’t-

A shellter blooms- the shout far off- and Adrien rams through it. His powers crackling green as black mist leaks through his hands and he keeps running. He runs and runs and refuses to think about that. Refuses it all. He needs to get underground. That’s his place. They can’t get him down there.

No one will be with down there.

And he needs this all to go away!

Adrien scrambles on all fours, clattering and rumbling all around him, dodging the yo-yo and flings sideways. He sees a alley, he can get down there and find some way down into the sewers-

Someone- Rena- slams into his side. He yowls, but she doesn’t go for a grappling move, reaching at his head, grabbing-

He headbutts her and rolls away, stilling at the shrill scream Pollen lets out, rapidly fading and Adrien looks for where the miraculous went-

He sees it, Rena’s running for it, and he sees Ladybug’s yoyo.

“I’m so sorry Pollen,” He hisses it out, turning as she vanishes from sight once Rena grabs the comb.

He jumps away- he can see the manhole- but the yoyo wraps around his foot and yanks. Ladybug’s there, bright red and fierce, and that’s at him and no. No no no. He has to, he can’t get caught by her. No, no, he can’t.

“Cataclysm!” It shoots from him, fast and desperate, and he swipes at the yoyo string. It doesn’t break immediately, so much of his strength and energy funneling into it, but he has to break it and he throws that pure need to Plagg and his powers and the string snaps.

Falling, his whole suit crackling and misty and he’s tired but pumped, Adrien throws his hands together. That black mist bursting out. Not to destroy anything but sight. Nothing but light in this one area. To still all those waves, just for a moment, and Adrien slips down underground. Racing through the tunnels.

He doesn’t go anywhere near his hideout, he’s not taking that chance. But he winds and goes up and down and everywhere until he can’t hear anything but his own heartbeat and lungs.

And then he stops.

And everything just spills out of him.

“Cl-claws, claws- wait.” He chokes out, collapsing against the wall and his hands tremble as he pulls out the rest of the fast food bag and he thinks that maybe he should also pull out a few waters and other foods he has in there because that seems like the logical right thing to do. Something that has to be done.

“Okay, okay… claws in.” Adrien gasps, shuddering at the feeling, and gently cups Plagg. Blinks as the other two come up and, yeah, shit, Gigga. They must have so many feelings about this too but he forgot when it all just- when did it get so bad? And Gigga heard everything about their old wielder.

“Kit…” Plagg doesn’t know what happened, he wouldn’t really, but Adrien probably doesn’t paint a pretty picture. His face feels all blubbery and he’s definitely crying and he doesn’t know what to do but-

“I got- there’s I- camembert. Bag. Yours.”

“Kit, what-”

“Just, please, just eat it Plagg- I- I need to-”

He needs to breathe, think. So many other things he needs to do. He can’t be here but he isn’t wanted by Ladybug and he’s only a burden right now to Father when he can’t do a single photoshoot like this or anything and he’s hungry again and thirsty and he has no idea what he’s going to do.

“He’s hospitalized?” Gigga mutters, floating down. “He’s…”

“Gigga,” Adrien tries to reach out, “I’m so- so sorry. I-”

Gigga floats away, glares out their eyes. “You didn’t know, you didn’t even care to think of it.”

“I-”

Gigga just shakes their head and flies off. Going somewhere. Adrien doesn’t blame them for wanting to be anywhere as long as it isn’t next to him.

“It’s, hey, Kit, Gigga will come around.” Plagg flies up to him, “Just give them a moment.”

“But- I- they- after what I did-”

“After what that theft did, you didn’t do anything that crazy. Trust me Kit, I know when something’s over the line.”

Adrien wipes at his eyes and swallows and maybe, yeah-

“Ah!” His arm flares up in sudden pain, claws dragging down his skin and his neck buckles under the abrupt slam to his head and chest. “Shit- shit, what’s- what’s wrong?”

“I-” The ring begins to crackle, green lightning chomping and slashing at the air and into his hand. “I don’t know Kit! I mean- something happened when you used cataclysmed against Tikki-”

“I was just trying to get away! Just the yoyo… ugh, gods, can you take the pain away?”

Plagg shakes his head, frantic. “I’m trying! Something’s not right anymore!”

“But, but-” Adrien shouts out, his whole arm trembling and twisting up in the bright shocks tearing through muscles and bones. “I can’t- Plagg!”

“Take it off!” Plagg blurts, “If you take off the ring then it can’t-”

“No! No! I’m not-”

“Just for right now! Until everything calms down!” Plagg butts his head, Adrien falling forward into it as he sobs against the agony building in his arm. “I’ll still be right here Kit, I’m not going to go anywhere. Just until it’s better.”

Adrien sobs, can’t even get himself to nod before he pries the ring off and shoved it to the ground next to him. The ring’s still crackling, and cracks appear in the stone, but the pain eases from his arm.

Plagg’s still there, going fainter, and sighs visibly. “Alright, okay, that’s better. Right Kit? You feel better?”

Adrien sniffs, does manage to nod. His arm still hurts, his head and chest pulsing and pounding, but not so bad.

“Good!” Plagg smiles, actually smiles, and god, Adrien must be in a sorry state then, and goes fainter. “And once you feel good again then you’ll put the ring back on and we’ll march right back up to Pigtails and show her she can’t just push around. That we aren’t taking any orders anymore!”

“Right,” Adrien whimpers, trying to match Plagg’s tone but caught on how Plagg’s fading and fading and fading. “No one can tell cats what to do.”

“That’s… spirit Kit! So just… ea…… I’ll…”

And Plagg vanishes.

And Adrien has no one left around him.

He just wants someone, just one. If Plagg could be here. Pollen. He couldn’t do that to Gigga. But also, also a person. A person would be nice. Someone. Anyone. Nino. Ladybug. Chloe. Mom. Felix. Kagami. Father. Someone. What did he do wrong that they aren’t- why is it- why doesn’t he have a person? What hasn’t- what more does he need to do?

His chest caves and buckles and it’s so hard to breathe, to push it back up when there’s nothing. He’s only had Plagg here at the end, and even then Adrien couldn’t use the ring right, couldn’t handle it, and now Plagg had to go. Plagg, who’s been there the entire time, who’s always been there and now Adrien can’t even have him around-

Squeezing onto his mother’s brooch, Adrien curls up around nothing in the cold storm sewers. Focusing on that Plagg is here, just not with him, and not wanting to think about anything else. Nothing else. And just sobbing through it all. Praying that he’ll just fall asleep soon.

Chapter 12: Unbound

Notes:

I want you to all know that this next chapter was so long (even by my standards) that I had to spilt in it into two. If you're wondering why there's another chapter in the story now.

Adrien jolts at the hit, of stones hitting him. He jolts, but he doesn’t bother getting up. It’s pointless. He can’t even- he can’t- what would he do, getting up? Hide from Ladybug. Try to talk to Nino. Not think about whatever’s going to happen when the next akuma is sent out. If they can even face it. Maybe he doesn’t even have to be there, they got Pollen after all. He can just… stop caring.

Since, god, it hurts. It hurts so much to care, to care about everything Ladybug said, to care that Rena and Carapace just attacked without question, to care that his input isn’t enough is never enough that his opinions never change anything. That this entire time it’s just been him playing his part and forced to stay there. That despite how hard he tried this is exactly the same as it is back home. That he went out and tried to make his mark and now he’s marked as an enemy of Ladybug and before that just a pawn in her plans. Even at school, he made friends, Father definitely wouldn’t approve of Nino, but has he done anything else?

Prove it, that’s what Ladybug asked. Prove to the world that he did something on his own, without help, with his own agency, and everything that he can come up with just figuring out a way to have someone else help him.

“Chat Noir?”

Adrien jolts up, gaping up at Pollen and Gigga staring down at him. They look concerned, but they also look concerned on the backdrop of the city and night air. They can’t- it shouldn’t be possible-

He pushes himself to his feet, only with his left since his right arm still hurts- it feels shattered and the shards of it digging and tearing at what’s left of it- and he’s transformed. He certainly doesn’t feel transformed. His arm hurts too much for that. The power too big and bloating and pushing on his insides.

This is a nightmare. A really vivid memory nightmare. God, those are the worst.

“Are you alright?” Gigga asks, and Adrien starts crying at the raw concern in their voice when he doesn’t deserve it. When he- “Ah! Crying! You’re crying! I- don’t- AH! Pollen?”

The two kwamis stare each other for a moment, definitely a nightmare. Maybe now they’ll gossip and talk about how awful Adrien is. How he just hurt people and caged them to himself because he’s weak and scared and can’t do anything himself-

He curls in on himself, almost falling again, his heart hammering, crumbling and aching with each beat, each drum against his lungs that can’t relax enough to inhale or exhale properly. Just stiff muscles and fragile bones and it hurts. Adrien wants it to stop hurting.

But he isn’t made for good things.

Adrien flinches away from the yoyo blur, and there she is. Ladybug.

She did this. She called the others. She made the decision that he’s too much of an idiot to understand what his own miraculous is doing. She knew Fu. She kept him in the dark about everything. She doesn’t want him to have the ring. She wants to take Plagg.

“CATACLYSM!”

Green and gold lightning burst from the ring- his arm blurring out into a bright haze of pain that goes numb- and black mist leaks from the suit as he charges at her.

She yelps and dodges with wide eyes, and good. She should be surprised, she should be scared. He refuses to be pushed around and tied down any longer!

“Adrien!” Pollen yells after him. “What are you doing?”

“Huling!”

The tiles and roofs shake, parts of walls crumbling down where the lightning hits, and Adrien keeps moving. Faster and faster so his footing isn’t lost. So he doesn’t get tripped up. No, no this time she’s getting tripped up. This time, Adrien’s going to take her miraculous. And then nothing and no one can ever take Plagg away!

If he has both creation and destruction, nothing can ever get to him ever again!

“Chat Noir!” Ladybug dodges, fumbling as the whole structure begins to tremor. “You have to stop! You’ll bring down the building!”

“I’ll bring it back!” He claws forward, she jumps back and he is just inches from her suit. Just one touch and she won’t be able to hold the transformation.

“Wha- you can’t have the earrings and ring at the same time!”

Adrien knows that. The book reeks of fear and warnings from what that might cause. All of reality, the capacity to change anything in the universe or the universe as a whole, it can’t be taken lightly.

“Shut up!” His arm bursts apart, turning back into a wave of darkness with jagged golden veins running through it. “I know that! I know a lot more than just fighting!”

She scampers as he thrusts the wave of it to her, flinging her yoyo into the black storm. “Restore!”

Adrien can feel the magic there, creation, fighting to make his arm again.

He destroys it. Rips it apart. All creation, all of it, gone! He doesn’t want her to have any influence over him!

There’s a boom, a burst of black and white ripping from them, and it hurts- a jolt of lightning striking his chest- but Adrien shrugs it off quickly because Ladybug’s still here and he isn’t safe and-

She turns and runs, zipping through the streets and Adrien goes to make chase-

“ADRIEN!” Pollen flies in his face, waving her arms frantically. “You must stop!”

“I’m not stopping until I get those earrings! Then she can’t hurt me anymore! I can’t be hurt then! She can’t take you!”

“She isn’t, she won’t!”

Adrien opens his mouth, to retort and fight back, when, wait- he is talking to Pollen. And this isn’t just a nightmare. He can’t feel like this in a nightmare. But he knows what he lived through. He felt that too and-

“There was an akuma,” Gigga starts, “It grabbed your shadow and you froze.”

He wheezes, hot and bursting and trying to think as the ground beneath him shifts. “I- akuma? No, no there wasn’t, I was just-”

“It was used to make you emotional-”

“Then congratulations Hawk Moth!” He spits it out, throwing his arms out- his right exploding into a spear that takes out a chimney. And he destroys all of it before the rubble can get to the road. “Mission successful! But Ladybug was attacking me. That happened! You saw it, she threw her yoyo at me!”

“There was a butterfly behind you-”

“She could’ve maybe mentioned that then!”

“To be fair, you didn’t give her a chance.”

“Fairness?” He snarls, grabbing and clawing at his chest. “You want to talk about fair when she- when she admitted to knowing- to saying I’m a danger-!”

It’s hard to vocalize. The pain. The grief. Guilt and terror because he thought that they were partners. That he could trust her with his life. He thought and if he was wrong about her, who else is he wrong about?

It becomes even harder to vocalize when the akuma alarms start going off.

And it’s a lot easier to hate Hawk Moth- the person preying off these emotions, using them for his own sick purposes, intentionally hurting and stomping all over people at their lowest- and Adrien glares out to where a giant baby is stamping through the streets.

This won’t be hard then.

He pounces towards the akuma, riding his baton without the ability to run with his right hand as well as the pain throbbing in his bones. Easily ignorable, easy to burn away with this hate and anguish.

“Hey!” He yells at the baby once he gets close, the bawling akuma glancing at him. “It’s past your bedtime!”

The baby swipes and grabs at him, so slow, so easy to twirl and dodge and jump off arms. He keeps his right hand mostly formed, skirting over the outfit to find the akuma, paying no attention to the frustrated cries.

He gets it, more than anything, not knowing what to do with these emotions, not knowing what they mean or what can be done with them. Wanting, more than anything, for it to just go away.

The akuma’s in the bracelet, and Adrien takes care to smash that with a kick than to not let it anywhere close to his ring. He can’t destroy the butterfly when this baby threw a temper tantrum on the nearby buildings.

Ladybug must have been hovering since she scoops up the akuma and Rena jumps in to scoop up the falling baby. The healing ladybugs flooding over the area as Rena gently coos and cares for the baby.

Whatever. Not his job anymore, he’s just going to go-

Ladybug swings down- and he hates her for that, coming to him when he can’t attack, can’t properly defend himself, not with these people here- but stays a few good feet away from him. “Chat? Can- can we talk?”

Rena perks up at that, a lot of people do and- and he hates- he doesn’t-

“No. I’m done talking.” He glares, the storm that is his right hand thundering with green and gold lightning. “I don’t know how much was real or not, but I’m done listening to you. I don’t care what you think is happening to me, you don’t get to care anymore, so don’t bother.”

That sounds bad, awful, and he knows that there has to be a phone nearby, recording. Silent, unblinking eyes always watching for his every downfall. Ears hidden everywhere and always waiting to grab his raw emotions.

He just doesn’t care. Let them tear him apart. It doesn’t matter. No one ever seems to like him when he’s trying to be nice, when he’s trying to be good.

Her mouth opens, eyes wide and locked on his arm. “Chat, this isn’t-”

“Ladybug.” He scowls, “Give my regards to your Master, he sure showed me how to be ruthless.”

Rena steps up, arms up. “Whoa, buddy, let’s just sit down a moment-”

Adrien simply jumps away, gritting his teeth against a sob because he knows that he can get away even when they try their hardest. Barely getting a few rooftops away as he sees Carapace jumping towards where the akuma was. Whatever. He and Rena can decide to be heroes or not, decide this is too much or not, Adrien can’t- he’s doesn’t care.

He doesn’t want to care!

Tripping, Adrien rolls through over the roof, tiles clattering and coming off with him, and he scrambles to get his feet under him to jump at the end. A desperate thrust into the hair that ends with him crash landing on a restaurant patio someplace.

One of their chairs is now ruined. He tried to grab it with his right to hoist himself up. Only to end up flopped on the ground again.

And he sobs, tries to hold it back but his chest shudders and caves and he sobs. Sobbing and yowling, loud and devasted, squeezing his eyes shut as it all pours out and crashes back in because Ladybug- Ladybug she knew-

She knew Fu. She knew that he didn’t like Adrien with the ring and she did nothing to stop him. To warn Adrien, didn’t try to fight for him. Just some pathetic compromise to use the bee miraculous that hurt him more. Not that she cared! Not when she cared because she believed Fu over him on what was best for him.

She told him it was stupid. It was bad. It was wrong to try to learn more about the miraculous and she was doing it the ENTIRE time. Long before he thought of it. Long before he actually started experimenting.

For months.

The first-person Adrien knew he could build a relationship with when his face and name wouldn’t be an issue. And what happens? Apparently he wasn’t good enough to be trusted with anything. Not plans against akumas. Not knowing Rena. Or Carapace since he figured that out himself. Not even trusted to use his own miraculous.  

It’s worse, somehow, now than it was in the nightmare illusion. Maybe some part of him knew, or maybe it couldn’t inspire all these feelings in the mirage.

Now there’s nothing to numb. Just sheer ripping sobs tearing through his body, trying to make the pain physical and push it out but it can’t. It can’t since there’s nothing that can make this go away!

Adrien shudders and sobs, but, but maybe- maybe he can make it go away. He has the ring of ultimate destruction. Surely, surely he can take out something as simple as these emotions. This pain? Can’t destruction get rid of it?

Curling his right hand to his chest, letting the feel of everything, of this reality, crash over him, crashing over him. Overwhelming. And go, go go go, he needs a word, something, an idea, to make it go away. A blanket of destruction where none of this can get to him and it can just stop hurting.

It starts to rise, a word, the sensation, his desire going to the ring and getting shaped. Adrien inhales shakily-

His right arm flashes green, and Adrien screams, his body burning and he contorts and spasms on the ground. Desperate to move. Desperate to be still. Anything to stop the burning the fire and flames eating and spitting searing ash over his bones.

“Adrien!” There’s a yellow buzz in front of him. “Adrien! Your body’s okay! Just try and breathe!”

He shakes his head- it hurts it all hurts he can’t move anything- and there’s a sharp thump on his head.

“Breathe!” Gigga chants, “Breathe! Please! You must!”

“Kit! Oh, oh I’m so sorry. But I had to- Kit, come on Kit! You can’t go like this!”

He swallows, tries to wheeze. His throat shrinks as he tries to breathe with the muscles there, trying not to use his chest. But he can’t and the kwamis are all still crying and begging around him, pleading with him to breath, and he scrunches up and opens his mouth and forces his chest to expand.

It hurts, it hurts, and it’s all he can do to listen to the kwamis. To listen to Pollen guiding him through each burning, crushing breath. To listen to Gigga spurt off random information that they know about air and why it’s important and to keep breathing. To listen to Plagg apologizing, too many times from his dear friend, and telling him to keep fighting.

Adrien’s so tired of fighting.

He thinks that, if he were snapped back into last year, he wouldn’t let himself get tangled up in this so much. Last year, knowing what he does, he’d just call the other heroes in and maybe Ladybug would trust them. That the black cat hero would never even show up.

Adrien sobs, the breathing pattern Pollen’s working so hard to establish crumbling apart. But he pushes his chest out and breathes. In and out through it all. Over and over again, fighting. Fighting in part because he knows how to do that. Mostly for them, the kwamis, his friends. Fighting for him too.

It gets better, eventually. His chest still spilt open and his arm a fiery plane of death, but he can think. He can breathe naturally.

“Kit?” Plagg gently nuzzles his face, “You with us?”

“Yeah…” He moans, curls up on his left side on this random rooftop in the middle of the night. “I’m here.”

“Do you…” Gigga starts, “Do you want to know what happened?”

Adrien sighs, it might be good to know. He doesn’t want to hear it. “Later. Maybe. I assume she still said stuff like ‘me being a danger’ and ‘knowing Fu’ and ‘not safe for me to wear the ring’.”

Pollen winces. “Perhaps not directly, but it was heavily implied.”

Ah, so they didn’t get to the direct parts. Not that it seems to change anything.

Another breathless sob punches its way out, and Adrien wipes his eyes on his sleeve.

“Why didn’t you at least let me get rid of it? I just- I was so close-”

Plagg begins to purr nuzzling his face and fussing with his hair. “Kit, I am sorry this happened to you, but I am never going to keep the transformation up if I feel you turn my powers onto yourself.”

“Ah,” Adrien’s face twists, almost wanting to smile at the bitterness of it all but still sobbing a bit too much for it. “Maybe we should take this to Ladybug as proof that even like this, you won’t let me get hurt.”

“Well, funny you should mention it-”

“Anyway!” Pollen interrupts, and he cracks an eye open to see her glaring up at Plagg before suddenly smiling at him. “We need to do something. Food. Water. Tea, or uh, medicine?”

“I-” Adrien hauls himself upright, “I’ll call in sick for tomorrow, today, and- Ah!”

His hand seizes up in a cramp once he leans back on it, and Adrien tearing up all over again- huffing and hiccupping with sobs he was trying to ease away- as he massages it. The ring’s sliver darkened, the middle of the jaws filled with a deep red as they stretch close to his next knuckle.

But Adrien’s not going to think about that. Just sucking in air and releasing it. It’s rough and not easy despite him just trying to hecking breathe and breathing shouldn’t be so difficult!

He just wanted to be… Adrien. He didn’t want to be a superhero or be responsible for all this. He just wanted to do good things that he could look back and know it was him. HIM. Not for any brand or political reason. Make a friend that was just HIS. Be loud and joke and free to do anything in the city. Nothing to hold him back.

And somehow that got all ruined! How! What did he do wrong? What is it about him? Is he just forever going to have to be caged up for his own good? Is everyone going to look at him and draw that conclusion?

If Adrien tells Nino the truth, or even if he doesn’t, will he decide the same thing?

His lungs cave again as he tries to breathe, a horrible whining noise coming out.

“Okay, okay-” Plagg abandons the hair grooming and flies to his face, aggressively nuzzling it. “We need to do something about this-”

“Do what?” Adrien cries, sobbing again as a fresh wave of tears pour down his face. “I thought I was doing everything right! And now Ladybug hates me and thinks I’m too violent for the team and Hawk Moth knows we’re having problems and- shit- shit, I was almost akumatized. Do we have a plan if there’s an akuma without Ladybug? Would cataclysming it tell him who I am?”

“I don’t know,” Gigga replies earnestly which Adrien might kinda love them for that as Plagg and Pollen just stare at him with very concerned too big eyes and then look at each other in panic. “The long-range capabilities of miraculouses have never been studied. It’s bad that he knows this, but it is exciting that he figured out how to carry his powers.”

Adrien also loves Gigga right now because he’s rapidly realizing talking about Hawk Moth is much better than thinking about why he feels so sick and he’s really kinda of cold but also not and can’t breathe very well still or keep his heart beating calmly.

“Ca-carry his powers? I thought akumas were just… a Nooroo thing.”

“Oh stars no!” Pollen cries, “Nooroo is the kwami of empathy!”

“Kit, geez, did I never say anything? Most of the previous butterflies hugged their champions. They’re usually insufferable little rays of sunshine trying to make the world a better place. You’d hit it off with, like, all of them.”

“I don’t know how he does it. Yet it could be possible for any miraculous to do so then.”

“Ah…” Adrien swallows, trying to push today away just to think about this. “I think I get it. That’s… would his akumas be more powerful if he didn’t use a butterfly to get to them then?”

“Yeah, but, then someone would know him.” Plagg’s eyes glow- Adrien rubs his cramped up arm as the ring glows with his eyes- and glares off to the side. “And if that secret gets out then I’m going to end him.”

“And Ladybug called- called me violent.” He tries to chuckle, just gets choked up again and cries. When did he… he tried to be gentle up until the point where there’s no other option. He’s not-

He’s not a violent person? Right? He’s…

“I’m not violent.” Adrien swallows, looks at the three kwamis. “I’m not a violent person, right? Like, I’m- that’s no, no- I’m not like that. I’m not that kind of person! I don’t hurt people! I don’t-”

“Shh, shh, no, no you’re not violent…” Pollen starts stroking his hair as Gigga shakes their head- “You didn’t even really hurt the akumas or no one I’ve seen except for, well…”- and Plagg is almost aggressive burrowing into his chest and purring or maybe growling.

“You should go to one of your human friends!” Pollen blurts, “They’ll be able to tell you! And you could get out of this weather and get some warm drinks in you!”

“Go… go talk to someone? But…” Adrien whimpers. He wishes he didn’t, wants to deny it, but it’s getting harder to talk. Like his throat is closing around something hard and hot. Adrien thought he was getting better, calming down, but it’s all rising back up- “I’d be bothering them and-”

“That’s a load of rubbish Kit!” Plagg cries from his chest. “Like saying swiss is like camembert or something! Unacceptable!”

“I can’t do- but- just- look at me!” Adrien grits his teeth, trying to keep sobbing. But Ladybug hates him when he was trying to do the right thing and now he’s basically incapable of it so why. Why not just sit here on this roof and just rip it all from his chest and then never talk to anyone again and spare them and him all this stupid hurt.

Just go back to modelling and staying shut in. It was easier that way. Maybe Father wouldn’t be so disappointed with him and would then spend more time with him. The kwamis and Father, maybe that’s enough.

A lie, because adding in the thought of never seeing Nino again sends him buckling down again as he shudders.

“No matter what you look like,” Pollen states, with a firm certainty, “Your friends will want to see you.”

“I can’t go-” He’s thinking of Nino, because he always dumps his problems on Nino first, but no. He sees that shield bursting in front of him. Of the secrets he has. That he stole Wayzz from Nino and stunned him still to guarantee that he could. That Nino needs to even decide to even want to be a permanent hero and this would mess that up and Adrien refuses to mess up anything more. He already lost one person, he can’t do this to Nino too.

He just won’t. Nino doesn’t deserve this. Adrien promised to keep threats away from him and all Adrien’s doing is thrusting his broken parts at him. No, no. He won’t. Not today at least.

“Don’t go to ShellBoy then,” Plagg nuzzles and butts his head into his ribs, forcing him to exhale. “Go to Pollen’s pick. The striped shiny one.”

“Ch-Chloe?” Adrien spits out, thinks, wonders. Chloe already knows he’s broken. Chloe’s more violent than him. But, still, Chloe’s already done a lot for him this year. Trying to become a better person and what has he done? Just asked and asked and asked for things and hasn’t ever really helped her-

“Yes!” Pollen nods along, “I’ve transformed with her. She’s very territorial, or, uh, protective… loyal? There’s no great word to describe her soul but she will take charge of this.”

“She’ll want to know who… she’ll hate, I mean I won’t tell but Chloe looks up to Ladybug. And- and with her mother- I can’t do that to her either-”

“You can,” Gigga shrugs at him, each of her arms grabbing onto a finger and squeezing. “I know that you can. I may be ignorant of what will happen when you get there, but I’m confident it can’t be worse.”

Adrien sniffs, “I… it’ll be okay?”

“Of course!” Pollen pounces, “If anything, she might be more upset that you wouldn’t go to her.”

“Yeah, your friend is tough, Kit. She’s not going to break from this. Trust me.”

“Oh…” Adrien cries a little more, he isn’t sure why it’s just kinda coming out of him and he can feel it but he doesn’t get it. “Oh yeah? Yeah, okay, okay. I’ll… I’ll go crash Chloe’s.”

“Then come on,” Plagg flies to the ring, nudging it as it flashes green. “Let’s go.”

“Yeah, okay, claws out.”

Adrien heaves, clawing for air as the transformation hits him. Just a physical blow of power shoved into his body. Which, god, because apparently this day can’t get worse. Make his transformation with Plagg all wrong and upsetting.

Although maybe that’s because of Plagg. Maybe he’s nervous Adrien will try to hurt himself.

“My King-”

“Huling!”

“I’m fine,” He groans, breathes as it kinda settles and grabs his baton. Perparing himself to try and feel better the normal way. “Let’s… let’s just get to Chloe’s.”

“Remember,” Pollen says as she gets on a shoulder, Gigga on the other. “You have to go through the front door.”

“Right.” Adrien nods, definitely forgetting that little detail in this mess of everything, and shoots off towards the hotel. It’s a little shaky and too fast and he trips into an ally. The walls cracking as he claws for purchase and then the ground splintering under him as he lands. Tail squished uncomfortably under him.

“Ugh, that’s great.” Adrien peels himself up, scratches at his face. Whips snot and tears off. “Claws in.”

Maybe this was a bad idea. It’s difficult enough to trudge towards the hotel. If it weren’t for the three kwamis, Plagg taking his rightful place up on his head, Adrien might have just thrown it in and curled up in his hideout or room and just waited for the feelings to go away. They do eventually, if he just sits there long enough, exist through the waves of sadness, it’ll just pitter out into something he can live with. And then eventually he’ll go through his day and something will make him happy again and it'll be behind him. He could have done that again than bother Chloe.

But the kwamis don’t understand that, and he doesn’t really want to explain that, and he’s already here, so, whatever, it doesn’t matter. Maybe he just won’t say much so he doesn’t have to lie for the entirety of this visit.

The doorman glances at him when he walks up. Which, fair. He’s in his pjs that have to be dirty and definitely aren’t for this weather and he must look terrible.

“Hi…” Adrien sighs. He kinda just hates how he’s always concerned about his appearance. He doesn’t want to be. He doesn’t want to care. “I’m here to see Chloe? I’m, uh, Adrien. I need to see her.”

“I think you need to get home,” The doorman frowns. “We can at least call a taxi.”

“I need to see Chloe.” Adrien repeats, bunching his fists because he is not going to back down! Not this time! He- he doesn’t want to be pushed aside again. Even if this is so, so utterly exhausting. “Just call her. I’m her friend. She’s my friend. I just want to see her.”

“Chloe’s friend?” The frown gets worse. “What did you say your name was?”

“Adrien. Adrien Agreste.”

Recognition hits the doorman, and he nods and then apologizes and lets him in and promises to call and all that. Everyone starts bending over backwards once they realize who he is. The influence around his face and name. Hoping one way or another to take some for themselves or to make sure he won’t use his name to hurt them.

Chat Noir is different. Chat Noir is untouchable too, but still Adrien. There’s power. Mystery. But he can still joke and be himself. No one knows him, can try to hurt him.

Or so he thought.

He bends his head again, clenching his jaw and forcing his breathing slow. He’s not crying here. In this stupid elevator. Not when there are three all-powerful kwamis hugging him.

He is still Chat Noir. He’s a superhero. That’s still him. It might be with Plagg and he has teammates but he’s still there. He’s still doing that. Him! And if he can do all that he can not break down in an elevator simply thinking about a reality that he’s existed in for his entire life. The only thing he’s known his life.

“Adrien?” Chloe’s poking her head out as he’s still in the hallway. Her sleeping mask on her forehead, hair messy, not a speck of makeup on her. “Oh shit, bad, huh?”

“What?” Adrien grumbles back, slipping past her into the room. “You know I only ever come at some terrible morning hour with exceedingly good news.”

Chloe tuts, “Good to know you still get sassy when you’re all depressed and deflective.”

He flops down onto her couch, sighing. “Sassy’s better than saddy.”

“Okay, now that was sad.” Chloe, despite her appearance, smoothly sits down on another couch and presses the phone to her ear. “Yes, it’s me, Chloe. I want four hot chocolates and a tub of that super nice cherry ice cream. …I don’t care if it’s three in the morning, I said I want it! Would you like me to bother my father at this hour- hm, yeah, that’s what I thought.”

“They’re still people, you know.” Adrien glances over as she sets her phone down, defy picking up a remote as if it were a delicate diamond. “And this is a high-stress job.”

“It’s not like I’m actually going to get Daddy to fire them, but someone has to do something about-” Chloe swirls a finger at him- “that.”

She then fiddles with the large tv until it lights up with the show that features a litter of puppies or kittens- it’s puppies this time- growing up and it’s adorable and it kinda makes him want to cry more for some reason as he watches Chloe turn the volume down until it just murmurs in the back.

“Okay, we’ve got ice cream and hot chocolate and the tiny animals.” Chloe waves, in almost judgement but he’s pretty sure it’s just a front. “Go on, start explaining this.”

Adrien sighs and looks up at the ceiling. He’s not sure why he let himself get convinced to come here. He has to lie. He can’t say why he’s upset since that would mean telling Chloe- the one person who did fail at keeping the miraculous a secret- who he is. He doesn’t think Chloe would expose him, but he also knows that would have some fallout that he just can’t even really think of let alone try and deal with.

“If you make me get Mr. Cuddly I will be upset with you.”

“Yeah, you and everyone else.” Adrien clenches his jaw, screwing his face up as his eyes begin to burn.

“Even that disgustingly… affectionate-” Chloe draws the word out as if just forming it is repelling- “boyfriend of yours?”

“I don’t wanna bother Nino with this.”

“I thought that was the whole point-”

“Well maybe I can’t! I’m not going to- this would drive a wedge into another one of his relationships that he’s trying to work on and I’m not going to ruin that.” Adrien scoffs, fists squeezing tight as the eye burning sensation gets worse.

Chloe hums. It trails off into a silence. A silence where Adrien’s looking at the ceiling, in the silence, clearly saying the wrong thing because of course. And very angry about it since all the kwamis have generally decided to just be curled on him but also refusing to look or say anything. Which is good, trying to maintain two conversations would kill him and he can’t resist against their big concerned eyes, but it feels all wrong right now and he just hates it.

“Nothing to say now?”

“I’m waiting for the ice cream and hot chocolate reinforcements.” Chloe gestures over to the screen. “Entertain yourself with the helpless animals.”

Adrien does look over, a terrible thing to do really and there was a reason he was looking at the ceiling, and he immediately starts tearing up again at the little puppies trying to jump over this obstacle but can’t and flopping around with too big feet and still trying-

“What did I do wrong?” It blurts from him. Blubbers. And Adrien’s left floundering with it all. “I did everything asked of me. I went beyond what I was asked to help but that was wrong? That was- I thought I was being good and-”

“Adrikins, you’re babbling.”

“Excellent observation,” Adrien wipes at his eyes. “Truly. Yes, didn’t notice in my spiral. Which is totally valid! I- I’m allowed to be not be so fucking perfect! I had a stupid day and a stupid week and it’s been really stressful and then I have a stupid nightmare and I’m allowed to be stupid about it!”

He gasps, he feels a strange wet burn in his throat and eyes and chest, and then shoves his face in his hands to groan.

“Well then,” Chloe tsks. “I need you to do two things for me thing. Have my share of goodies and then cough up the codes to the Agreste manor.”

Adrien groans louder and presses his hands further into his face. “You can’t go storm my house, Chlo.”

“I certainly can.”

“It won’t make this better.” Adrien rubs his eyes one last time before letting them drop. Clenching his jaw rather than letting his face run with all this icky feelings at how this is at Ladybug. Ladybug who Chloe still admires despite everything on fashion week. That this whole mess is something that Chloe wanted at some point.

A whole mess Adrien invited Nino into and whoever Rena Rouge is. A whole mess that despite all of this the thought of losing being Chat Noir makes him clamp up.

“Which, speaking of, where is that ice cream and hot chocolate already? I swear the service here is utterly ridic-”

“Hey.” Adrien swallows, stares at the ceiling. “What was it like being a hero? With the… comb thingy?”

Chloe huffs, “That was honestly the worst deflection I have ever heard. Just pathetic-”

“I just-” The memory is painful, awful, and Adrien sniffs. Because through all that awfulness he remembers Chloe alight with the bee miraculous that he can never hope to achieve. Because Chloe looked happy and powerful transforming, and it’s been awhile since he’s felt like that. “You looked so incredible. Like nothing could touch you and I wanted to know- if- being like that- did you still feel like yourself? Did you feel better?”

Adrien knows a few of those answers, the rush of transforming into Chat Noir for the first time nearly blinded him from everything except the thrill and rush and hunt and being there during Chloe’s transformation, but he’s realizing that he’s also probably a horrible friend for never asking about it. Obviously on that day they did a little, but Chloe never wanted more than a little and he never pushed.

Plus, this is a deflection. But maybe if he can help her with whatever issues and feelings she has about the miraculous he can feel better about his. Or at least not think about it.

Chloe stares before giving a small sigh. “I did. At first. That I was my true self and I was… perfect, but thinking back on it, all I felt was that ugly urge to reshape the world to make her- everyone see it. Then I got akumatized about ten minutes later, so you can see that really worked.”

“You looked like you,” Adrien mutters, “If that helps. Charging forward, dazzling of course, not stopping to care what others might think.”

“And I took a train hostage.”

“That got fixed.”

“Yes,” Chloe stands when there’s a knock at the door. “Someone else always comes and fixes things.”

Ah, he, uh, might have hit a nerve there. Whoops.

No, no this is good. He can help Chloe with that. Without revealing the fact he was there or have personal involvement in the whole thing beyond ‘just Adrien’. This doesn’t really have to do with the miraculous specifically anymore, so, bummer, but it’s still important!

Adrien sits up, moves over on the couch for her to sit down after setting the tray down. Definitely staring at the mug he’s reaching for and watching the steam try and leak out from the whipped cream.

“Letting others help doesn’t mean you did nothing.” He starts, “And having someone help you doesn’t make you helpless.”

“Okay, yes, enough of me talk though. I’m not the one who forced my way in at such an absurd hour-”

“Because we’re not perfect human beings. There’s no such thing.” It rolls out, a little desperate and terribly heavy. As if it’s a physical thing he needs to push out with his lungs. “Maybe we could have handled things better. But maybe our parents also suck and I can’t tell you how much I wanted to punch your mom that day.”

Chloe huffs, giving him a flat look. Lips pressed tight as she tries not to get emotional. “That was sweet up until the end. You punching my mom isn’t going to make me feel better.”

“Yeah,” Adrien slumps, sips at the chocolate. Objectively rich and creamy and it feels kinda tasteless. “And yelling at Father won’t really do anything.”

“Then what will?” Chloe grabs the ice cream and a spoon and falls back on the couch. “I can’t even get Daddy to talk to me unless I’m demanding something. Like, what am I, a trophy daughter?”

Adrien raises his mug. “And I’m the model son, cheers to us, huh?”

“Oh yeah,” Chloe’s lips slowly curl into a smile, “Clearly two perfect human beings right here.”

“Above all those peasants who, like, eat homecooked meals.”

“And those snobs with unimportant jobs who see their kids.”

“The envy of people everywhere who don’t get touched all the time and can only achieve subpar makeup.”

“Those lazy dumb kids that don’t know a thing about politics.”

“People who are so trivial that they can just leave for vacations.”

“All those naïve fools who think that kindness doesn’t have strings attached.”

“Yeah,” Adrien’s face twists into a bitter smile. “Clearly we’re the superior ones.”

“It’s what makes us superior.” Chloe grunts, “They could never be us.”

“But don’t you wish we could be them?” Adrien goes to scratch his hair, really petting Plagg. “To not care anymore? To not be so fucking aware of every eye and every camera. To just… disappear from it.”

That’s what Chat Noir was supposed to do. A break from that image. A way for him to destroy all his connections to Adrien and Gabriel. But he supposes he was still Adrien, and everything still went to ruin.

“Don’t you dare say that!” Chloe scowls, swatting him with the spoon. “I swear, you disappear on me and I’ll get Daddy to destroy every single park and never host another fashion show in Paris and I’ll- I’ll- I’ll make your worst dreams seem like nothing in comparison!”

Adrien snorts, he doubts it but hearing it just… he feels less sad.

“Don’t test me, Adrikins! I will!”

“Oh, come on, Chlo, I am but your humble prince.” He gives her a small smile, “Whenever my Queen calls on me, I will be there.”

She nods, “Yes, yes, very good then. You better not forget that.”

“Never.”

“And, and you know that… well obviously you know since you decided to run across the city at night without even changing to get here. Honestly, Adrien, it’ll be a miracle if this isn’t online tomorrow.”

“I do think miracles are possible. You’ll see.”

Chloe hums, eats some more of the ice cream as he sips at the hot chocolate. “And you’re an idiot if you think you’re not ‘one of them’. You are. At that stupid school.”

Adrien doesn’t say that she could be too. He does think it’s possible if she puts in the effort, consistently for the rest of the year, but she’s been too involved in politics to believe it. And she probably doesn’t even really care that much. Or maybe she does. It’s hard to tell about that with her. That’s not really the issue.

But he also knows that addressing her fears of being forgotten right now is either going to make him cry again or her angry and that’s a massive step backwards.

“I feel like a fake. Like it’s just another image to project.”

“Wow, you are a real idiot sometimes.”

“Thanks Chloe.”

“I’m serious. That boyfriend of yours,” Chloe gestures dismissively in the air and Adrien frowns at her. “Lahiffe, total loner. Didn’t really talk to anyone other than that stupid camera girl and Dupain-Cheng sometimes and maybe make small talk. If you weren’t being real, he wouldn’t have ever bothered with you.”

“Nino was a loner?” Adrien realizes she’s said other things, but like, what? “But he’s so cool. And so easy to talk to. And funny. And he made me a music playlist in a week of knowing me! And a ton after that and they’re all so awesome and just why would anyone not want to talk to him? He’s the best.”

Chloe laughs, with a bit of that haughty tone that tells him that she thinks he’s being dumb but, still, he holds his ground and glares. Mostly because what he said is true and he wants an answer.

“Oh, Adrikins, did it not occur to you he did some of that because he was crushing on you for months?”

Adrien drinks the rest of his hot chocolate.

“Also, how did you not realize you had a crush on him? You’d do nothing but follow him around like a puppy!”

“I am nothing but a stray cat.” He smiles and pets Plagg again. “Give me enough love and attention and you can’t me to go away.”

“See, this is why I want to go storm the manor.”

Adrien rolls his eyes and waves that away. “We’ve been through this, and you didn’t answer the question.”

“I thought that was just you droning on like a lovesick puppy.”

“Chloe…”

“Fine. I don’t know what you expect from me. He just sat in the back more concerned with listening to his music and avoiding eye contact. Hmm, now that I think about it, he used to skateboard, talked with all those other skateboarding clowns.”

“Chloe.” He says on instinct about the whole insulting thing. Then, “Wait? Nino can skateboard! That’s so cool!”

Chloe hums and delicately sips her hot chocolate.

Adrien squints at her. “What did you do?”

“I’m drinking hot chocolate and consoling my emotional wreck of a prince. Wishing that Sabrina was here. She’s better at recognizing meanings behind emotions.” Chloe hums, “She’ll make a killing working as a political campaign officer.”

“Now that’s a pathetic deflection.” Though it is touching to hear how Chloe respects Sabrina. “And you know I’m talking about the skateboard thing.”

Chloe huffs, “It’s not my fault that if those no-good chaos disasters spilled my latte on me that the principle saw that they could be a threat to the school and the student body and didn’t allow it anymore.”

Adrien gives her a flat stare. “Ask him to remove that.”

“I’m not ruining another sweater so you can make even more of those sparkly eyes at your boyfriend. Honestly, I’m doing the school a favor.”

“Make the concussion that if anyone hurts or damages private property they get the privilege revoked. And,” He continues at her unimpressed look, “If Nino does anything, I’ll pay for the costs. Sue the others for all I care. Lightly. But he can’t have it revoked.”

“Pay the costs and take me out shopping.”

“Deal.” Adrien grins, “Should we write it up and put our signatures down now?”

“You’re really not funny, Adrikins. Good thing you’re cute.”

“Excuse you, I’m drop dead gorgeous.”

“Annnnd now we’re back to the self-inflating humor.” Chloe yawns and pulls out her phone, “So if you’re feeling better and all that jazz, lets just watch these baby animals grow up and finish this stuff and sleep.”

Oh yeah, sleep. Eh, he already got a solid five or so hours and after the nightmare happened so late he usually doesn’t go to bed. Either the hideout or patrolling around the city. Hopefully he can talk to the kwamis once Chloe goes to sleep.

Adrien relaxes against the couch and turns up the volume, grabbing at the other ice cream that’s now at perfect softness. Muttering, “As if you can possibly deny that these little guys aren’t the cutest ever.”

Chloe hums, and she doesn’t really respond as they watch the show. She doesn’t get to the end of this one- the puppy one finished and now it’s a litter of about six kitties with not that much time left- and Adrien rolls his eyes at her and before carrying her back to her bed. Fully expecting to sit back down on the couch and then start crying again for hours.

In the end, Adrien doesn’t finish the show either.

Notes:

And there it is!
Believe it or not my original version of this was actually a lot better until I realized, 'hey, wait, what's Hawk Moth doing in all this?' and then in the second version Ladybug actually succeeds in taking ALL of Adrien's miraculouses. So... it could be worse?

Anyway, I'm going to pat myself on the back a little bit, since it didn't seem like ANYONE suspected that Adrien was under the influence of an akuma a little before the chase- there's like one line that implies it and the rest is just whether or not you believe Ladybug is going too far- and yeah. This is just a bit of a brag because I spent hours AGONIZING over that scene because it needed to be based off Adrien's perspective on his worst reality coming true without it being like, Sandman obviously a nightmare/fake situation. So all of it needed to be based off of reality and truth and very possible events based on his history but also just being the worst. And anyway I'm just really happy with how it turned out.

Until next week!

Chapter 13: To Fashion Diaster

Notes:

The unofficial part 2 of last chapter! Enjoy!

Adrien wakes up to arguing.

Waking up to noise at all is kinda weird, and it pulls him awake despite how much he very much does not want to do that. He didn’t sleep well, though sleeping at all is a plus, with the heavy black shadow seeping into his skin and holding him still. But he can hear Plagg and Pollen talking in sharp snaps, Gigga sprouting something every once and a while, so it must be big.

Adrien frowns and blinks at something Pollen said. If she’s trying to get Plagg to talk about something he doesn’t, it’s not going to happen. Ever. So he should probably wake up and diffuse the whole situation.

But then, right as he starts to sit up, they all freeze. Very clearly caught talking about something they don’t want him to hear.

“My King!” Pollen recovers first, smiling wide. “How are you this morning?”

“Though you’re still perfectly healthy,” Plagg rushes, “Physically. From the ring. All good.”

Gigga shrugs, “We actually can’t say that for sure as we’re unaware of any building consequences.”

“But-” Plagg swats at the spider kwami- “It’s not harming you.”

“It’s true that there’s no particularly poisonous effect happening.” Pollen hovers down to his arm, “Though it’d help our assessment if you could show us the markings?”

“No point, I can tell you they’re past the shoulder and now stretching over his heart and rubs.” Plagg shrugs as Adrien makes the mental note to come back to that once they leave the area with cameras. “This is still fine. I’m managing it.”

Which is true, Plagg’s the faintest he’s been in a while. Okay, maybe not after Simon Says. Which, Adrien can’t believe that was a week ago. Not even. Last week, Puppettear still wouldn’t be happening until past today.

Last week, he pulled an all nighter with Plagg, and Plagg alone, studying and realizing that there can be rune magic.

Adrien takes a deep breath. Tries not to get sad about the turn of his life’s stresses. Looks at Gigga. “How can we tell if this not fine?”

“There was a ritual of some kind used to peer into souls to determine their health and how acutely they can resonate with a miraculous. Only the guardians knew how to though. There’s no one alive right now that has the information.”

Sometimes, Adrien is really glad to have Gigga with him. They’re just blunt about this and, surprisingly, have straightforward answers.

Not that the answer is good. But it is good information to have.

“And, excuse you Kit, I can tell that you’re fine so we’re all good.” Plagg puts his arms on his hips and nods. As if that can just be the end of it.

Adrien looks at Pollen, “Do you think it’ll get worse?”

“It already has. We have only been able to see each other more clearly, and a soul is supposed to have natural barriers that keep kwamis separated.”

“But!” Plagg jumps in, “I don’t think there was a single other person who just carried around multiple miraculous so it could be that.”

Gigga nods, “This is unprecedented.”

“Thank you!”

“We cannot ignore the risk to Adrien’s soul!”

“I know his soul best!”

“Um…” Adrien gestures at himself, “Shouldn’t I know that?”

“It’s not like you can see or feel your own soul, Kit.” Plagg rolls his eyes. “That’s not how it works.”

Gigga tilts their head. “I think you might have though. You have a particular awareness about this.”

“What?” Adrien pats at his chest as if his soul is just chilling in there like his heart is. “But like, how?”

“I’m not sure.”

“Probably during the whole Style Queen fiasco.” Plagg flaps an arm, “Not important. What’s important is that nothing is happening now.”

Pollen throws her arms out, “But it could!”

“But I can control it if it gets to be a serious problem and if I can’t then we have you who can control it by transforming-” Plagg’s whiskers twitch- “or something and it’s all fine!”

“Okay,” Adrien lifts his hands when Pollen opens her mouth, “That sounds like a good enough plan. Since, well, that’s kinda low priority right now.”

Because he’s at Chloe’s and Father or his bodyguard or Nathalie have no idea and today’s Friday so school and then even if he’s not as upset- though it does still hurt to think about- his argument with Ladybug is going to have serious consequences on the team and battling akumas so they need to figure something out.

He also needs to make a decision if he should tell her about Gigga. He’s absolutely not giving either of them up, so there, but even though he’s absolutely devasted and angry and a whole other mix of emotions at Ladybug, he doesn’t want her to needlessly panic about another Hawk Moth showing up with Gigga’s miraculous.

Actually, there’s a whole bunch of things he needs to think about and make decisions on and… no. Not today. He needs- he can’t think about it.

He knows though, that given the chance, Ladybug might give Gigga back to that stupid old, awful human being of a man.

Which, fuck no.

“My King,” Pollen’s antennas shake softly, “This is your soul we are discussing.”

“Yes, but that seems resolved and-” Adrien turns to Gigga- “Do you… do you want to stay with me? Or at least say goodbye to your past holder? I should have asked earlier, but he can’t bother me since I can get the Agreste brand involved and charge him and Ladybug knows him so there’s that, but like, you can talk to him. Or find someone new. I won’t force you to stay with me.”

Gigga lowers their eyes, “No… that’s alright. It might be nice to say goodbye, but I don’t know how he would take our interaction. And I do not wish to know.”

Adrien smiles- pushing the sudden violent rise in him- and rubs their head. “Whatever you want. You’re free to stay with me for as long as you’d like.”

“Thank you!”

Plagg grumbles something, and later when this isn’t such a heavy moment Adrien will make sure that Plagg knows that he’s still his favorite.

“Anyway,” That all aside, Adrien gets up and rummages for Chloe’s phone. Dials Nathalie’s number. “We’ve got a different beast to contend with now.”

“Miss-”

“Hi Nathalie,” He speaks before she can get farther. “Sorry, sorry, I know I’m not in my room and I know I’m not supposed to take the bracelet off-” Which he does still have on but it should be showing he’s in his room- “but like, it’s okay! I just… had a bad night and I went over to Chloe’s. She had someone pick me up and I know I shouldn’t have but I just needed to get out but asking you and the bodyguard would’ve taken time and I-”

“Adrien,” Nathalie states, firm. “I’m not upset, please at least leave a note in the future so I know who to contact, and your father doesn’t know yet. Is your bag ready? I’ll have your bodyguard come pick you up for school then.”

Adrien sighs, feels an immense amount of gratitude for Nathalie. He has no idea where he’d be without her after Mother’s disappearance.

“Yes, it’s just there next to my desk. I’ll get ready here.”

“Very well.” There’s a pause. “And…” The phone buzzes with sudden static. “…you need to talk to anyone, I- I will listen.”

“Thanks Nathalie.” He appreciates it, but, she’s, it can be hard to talk to her. “I’ll remember that.”

“Okay, good, take care then Adrien, I’ll email…” Adrien glances at the phone at the next buzz, no bars? But-  “…but it’s still quite light but your father wishes that you make an appear at the DeMerda Foundation dinner tonight.”

That’s unfortunate. Hopefully Chloe’s going too. Or maybe Alix, he can’t remember if this would at all involve the Louvre.

“Alright, bye Nathalie. Thanks again.” Adrien ends the call, looks at the phone with full bars again, and throws it on the couch. He’s not going to worry about that at the moment. He needs to get ready and then find something of Chloe’s he can wear. They used to be able to play dress up together, though that was years ago, but Adrien needs only one outfit he can get into.

“Hmm,” Pollen- because Plagg never cares about his outfits and Gigga’s currently glued to the nature documentary he put on for them- squints at his outfit. “You exclude an uncomfortable air. This won’t do, my King.”

“Pollen,” Adrien sighs, “I only have so many choices. It doesn’t need to be perfect.”

“Nonsense! This week you have been the victor in many tough battles! You need to exclude confidence and power so that others will not prey on your weakness. We cannot afford another incident.”

Pollen isn’t wrong, Adrien feels a little hollowed out from everything that if something were to hit him again he’d just cave down into himself. That doesn’t mean they’ll be able to create the perfect outfit right now. Not when most of Chloe’s clothes simply don’t fit him. They’re designer clothes, designed for her.

“Well,” Adrien shrugs, “Why don’t we at least find something that works?”

Not everything fits, again, but the smoky sweater does. Adrien also would have preferred simple black slacks, not that anything Chloe owns is simple, but her few pairs don’t fit him. He’s thankful enough that their leg size is roughly the same, but she owns mostly tight-fitting pants that just doesn’t work. Which means he has to wear one of her looser black palette argyle slacks, a tight enough fit but at least it does fit.

“This is better, but,” Pollen frowns at him, “It’s still lackluster-”

“ADRIKINS!”

Adrien turns, he heard Chloe getting up but he assumed she’d at first stretch about or go to the bathroom. “Good morning, my Queen.”

“Hey,” Chloe squints at him in all of her sharp chaos that is her waking up. “You actually look good.”

“Um… thanks?”

“I didn’t think you could manage it yourself.” Chloe gives him a slow look and nod. “Not bad, still messing something.”

“Yes!” Pollen flies up beside Chloe and nods, “You should listen to Chloe, my King.”

He smiles and throws his arms out, “Well, anything in here that I can fit into?”

“Fear not,” Chloe clicks her tongue, “I know just the thing.”

With a flourish, definitely in her dominion, Chloe brandishes a jacket trench coat hybrid. It’s nice enough, sharper curved points at the openings. Not long enough to go past his knees as is traditional, but still at least will end up somewhere around mid-thigh.

He has no qualms about the style. It’s just…

“I’m already pretty dark,” Adrien gestures to his look right now, mostly dark grey and already has black with the pants. “Is a black coat really a good idea?”

Chloe levels him a look, almost identical to the one Pollen gives him, and he sighs and takes the coat. It’s a little tight still, he won’t be able to lift his arms up, but with the quality of the wool, pitch black and heavy, sits on him like a welcome blanket.

“Black’s definitely your color,” Chloe smirks at him, “But we can’t let a face like that get shadowed.”

“Chloe, it’s only school-”

She huffs as she turns towards her jewelry cases. “One where you’ve spent wallowing in sickness. The last thing you want is for people to pity you, then they’ll think you’re weak and take advantage.”

Adrien can’t come up with anything. Since, perhaps if he didn’t look like he was floundering so much with the bee miraculous, no one would have dared to try and steal Plagg away from him. Maybe if he didn’t try to be soft and approachable, then Ladybug wouldn’t have thought she needed to keep so many secrets from him.

He just… maybe he simply failed then. Trying to get people to like him, trust him, just as him. Maybe just him won’t work.

So he doesn’t say another word as Chloe hands him a belt with a large gold buckle. Or the gold chain pendant necklace, with the middle of the pendant circling a gleaming red gem.

“A ruby?”

“Red sapphire. I thought green would be a good touch, but…” Chloe nods, “You can work red.”

Pollen nods, “Yes, we should have woken up Chloe at first. We would have saved so much time.”

They have time to spare. School won’t be starting until another hour and a half and Adrien’s also taken the liberty of preparing Chloe’s stuff for school. And ordered plenty of food for all of them to nibble on as Chloe works on her makeup and outfit.

“Now, here! For the finishing touch!” Chloe extends her hand, and there in her palm is a single dangling earring. It’s quite a simple shape, a long rod pointed at the end, but the colors.

A swirl of black and gold, with the top of it sparkling with a dark blue jewel.

Adrien stares at it. Pollen stares at it with her deep blue eyes.

The blue doesn’t fit, technically, but Adrien puts it on. And then he wordlessly pulls out the peacock brooch still in his clothes and pins it on the underside of the overcoat.

Chloe isn’t exactly smiling, but she finally doesn’t look so sharp. “Utterly dashing, my prince.”

“Couldn’t have done it without my queen,” He bows down deep, also giving Pollen the space to compose herself.

“Yes well, now I need perfect myself so,” Chloe shoos him out of the closet. “Go do something about that hair and those eyebags. Since, my goodness Adrikins, did you not sleep at all?”

“There were puppies…”

“You’re ridiculous. Utterly ridiculous, I tell you.”

Adrien smiles and, because his skin doesn’t look all that seemly, does as she says. At least only the base part, he’s under no illusions that Chloe won’t have opinions about the look once she takes a look at him.

She proves him right in a few minutes- a few minutes all she needed decide a long sheath skirt that’s checkered black and white with a golden sharp vee neck finished with a black leather jacket- and they almost get in a small argument about it until she just shoves a pair of sunglasses at him until working on her own makeup. Which, of course, looks magnificent. So does the sunglasses.

Though, with his eyes covered by it and his hair styled back, he realizes that he got his wish.

If he showed up to school like this on his first day, no one would have dared approach him.

Adrien wants that to hurt, he waits for the regret, but it doesn’t come. He’s always been approachable and soft, an enticement to come closer, to look and see and try to emulate. His image is meant to inspire peace and happiness, confidence and hope, beauty and grace. He is dressed in whites and bright colors, always smiling, always looking up, always reaching out.

Never this. Never dark and stormy. Never cutting and sharp. Never dangerous.

His hand pulses, and as he massages it he goes to find some gloves. In case something does happen with the ring and the scars appear. Black, to match. Though he takes care to put the ring back over it, with its lengthening silver jaws closing around a then darkened red center.

He also pulls Gigga’s necklace from where it was hidden under the sweater. He stares at the hidden look of the miraculous, and as he stares and wills the design to fit, it shifts into slivery-gold woven collared necklace that meshes well above the pendant, almost making it appear as a multi-level necklace.

Then he takes Pollen’s miraculous, and as he holds it, the comb he usually just hides under all his hair, and wills that to reform as well. The comb melts and curves until it becomes a large cuff that he can hook onto his ear. Perhaps Chloe will question as to where he got such a thing, but he doesn’t feel bothered by the possibility. It will or it won’t.

Adrien stares at himself in the mirror. Dark and hidden, only brief slashes of light coming off, most of which are from the miraculous. Of untold power leaking out into this world as they curl around him.

He doesn’t really look like Adrien. Or even Chat Noir. Something else.

And maybe it’s something that will finally keep him and the kwamis safe.

 

They part like water as they enter.

Adrien had a firm no touching rule after Chloe looped their arms in through the hotel. He’s texted Nino, not sure how to word it but a little warning that he’s coming in with Chloe and his outfit is more intense than normal, but he’s not going to have Chloe on him. Though he doesn’t really want Nino touching him either.

Only the kwamis, with Plagg in his hair and the other two on his shoulders, are the exceptions.

There are whispers and cameras as they approach, and with one look over they freeze. They stop.

Adrien grins. It feels good to stop it. That he can finally get them to stop gawking and squawking at him.

“Doesn’t it feel better this way?” Chloe grins up at him. “No one bothers you like this.”

“It is nice.” Adrien sighs, “But I do like it when certain people talk to me. Just not all of them talking about me.”

Chloe hums, “Such an optimistic. Don’t worry, my prince, I’ll be here for whenever you need a reality check.”

Adrien chuckles, “I’ll count on it, now come on, you have to go speak with the principle about a certain skateboarding rule.”

Giving him a flat stare, Chloe huffs before striding over to the office. Adrien rolls his eyes before heading towards the lockers to find Nino and adjust his stuff and maybe eat one of his super nutrient survival bars.

He hears them first. Nino with Rose, Juleka, and Ivan all passionately discussing music. Rock especially, and it gets easier to hear when conversations around him are all quieting down. Or perhaps he’s just getting closer. Or maybe his ears are getting even better since he can hear Nino yawn.

His face is already spilt in a smile as he turns around the lockers and heads towards them, raising a hand in greeting when they all look his way and Rose’s words fumble off into silence.

“Good morning everyone.”

“Good morning, Adrien!” Rose claps her hands and takes in his outfit, “You’re very… expressive today!”

“Partly Chloe’s doing,” He gives a slight shrug, conscious of the kwamis there dozing. They had a rough night too. “Though it is nice. Father dislikes the dark aesthetic.”

Alix snorts and punches his shoulder as she goes by. “Well rich emo looks good on you. And I think Nino agrees.”

Nino jolts at that, glaring at her as she snickers off back into the courtyard.

“Chloe says black is my color, that and red.” Adrien looks at Nino, trying to judge his reaction. “Which, black is nice, but uh-”

“Yeah-” Nino clears his throat, bringing it lower- “You look great. Like, dude, fantastic. And nothing emo, Alix doesn’t know what she’s saying.”

He chuckles, “It might be the sunglasses. Chlo’s makeup isn’t like mine and couldn’t cover up the lack of sleep.”

Juleka mutters, “What’s even a sleepover with Chloe like?”

“Oh, uh… you know,” Adrien makes a vague gesture that will hopefully have them fill in the blank rather than having to come up with a complicated or truthful answer. “Lots of opinions going around.”

Ivan huffs at that, “Yeah, bet. Nice seeing you on your feet again.”

“Oh!” Rose smiles at him as he starts to walk off, “When you find Mylene can you ask her what she thinks of ‘Rainbow Mane’?”

Ivan gives a thumbs up as he goes off to search for his girlfriend. Which, as Adrien throws a question about this ‘Rainbow Mane’, he mostly focuses on opening his locker. Which doesn’t open. So he tries again and-

He frowns sharply at how the latch gets loose, flopping up and down without actually doing anything.

“-so we’ve still gotta figure out the words for… hey, is there something wrong with your locker?”

Jukela mutters an offer to get the janitor.

“Maybe, I just-” Adrien yanks at it again with the same success- “I don’t know what’s wrong with it.”

“It looks like something’s wrong with the latch?” Nino reaches towards it, fiddling and yawning, as Adrien reaches up into his hair to scratch it and knock Plagg awake.

“Huh? What?”

“Here,” Adrien smiles at him and gently draws and pushes the power from the ring, “Let me try to open it one more time before we get someone.”

“Wow Kit,” Plagg grumbles as he floats down, “Can’t even open the locker without help that’s just-”

The locker swings open, and Adrien immediately wipes around with a smile once he sees how the inner lock is dissolving a bit under a black tendril. Completely blocking it from sight.

“Looks like this is going to be a good day to end the week on.” He grins, hoping it doesn’t look too awkward as he’s standing to the side of his locker as he grabs a book to shove in there. Quickly slamming it back shut before anyone with a camera or a really good memory might catch that.

“That’s the spirit!” Rose grabs Juleka’s hand, “Don’t you think so?”

Juleka blushes, but Adrien loses her response as Nino leans in closer and Adrien very much so leans away.

“Sorry,” He gives a sheepish smile when Nino blinks. “Not, uh, not today. Is, is that alright?”

“Oh, uh, yeah, of course man. Whatever makes you comfortable.” Nino slips his hands into his jeans, jerks his head to the door. “You wanna head up to class?”

Adrien nods and follows, leaving the two girls quickly falling into their own little world behind.

“So,” Nino yawns midway through, tilting it into his shoulder. “Ugh, you all good? You’ve been pretty rough this week.”

“I’m a lot better, but geez, you forget to go to sleep last night or something?”

“Nah, something happened in the night.” Nino fiddles with his miraculous. “Another, uh, family member ended up taking care of it but, uh, it still isn’t quite resolved and I just couldn’t go to sleep after that.”

Adrien knows he’s talking about what happened last night. And Adrien could tell him it’s okay. Actually, maybe he should. Screw Ladybug and her secrets. What have they ever done except cause him pain? Except this terrible ripping and stretching of guilt and duty and fear? Nino isn’t going to betray them, he isn’t going tip them off for anything in return, and he isn’t loose with his identity. Adrien should tell him.

“Nino, I- it’ll be alright. I-” Adrien keeps his mouth open, willing the words to come. “I got a good feeling, your family are good people. And you’ll… you can be there for them.”

Adrien looks at his ringed hand and clenches his fist. If only, if only he could have just handled Anansi himself. If only he could have just learned the ring quicker, get stronger faster, knew more instead of wasting so much time just floundering in the dark. Then Nino wouldn’t even have to deal with this. This wouldn’t be his problem. It shouldn’t be his problem. Adrien just dragged him into it.

Or maybe, when he grabbed Wayzz out of wherever the kwami are, he just kept the bracelet himself. Transformed with Wayzz. Make sure Nino never had to deal with this fighting and stress. Nino would just be worried about the Challenge tomorrow and his grades and the end of the school year and everything. That’s all he should be worried about. But instead Nino can’t because Adrien let in a kwami that chose him.

Would Nino hate him for it? God, there’s so much that Nino could hate him for. Adrien stole his miraculous. He’s the reason why they even asked Rena and him to be permanent heroes. The late-night akumas. Missing class and scrambling to catch up. The fear, the fighting. Adrien used their alternate identities to talk to him to his advantage. All the secrets. All the responsibility. All the pain. All of it because of Adrien.

“Yeah, I guess,” Nino shrugs, “I just want them to be alright. I also think she’s- uh, they’re being an idiot and he- the other one is being dodgy but I also don’t have the full picture and just, I’m almost glad for school.”

Adrien pushes a smile up, “Almost?”

“I mean, it’s nice and predictable but fuck no I’m ever going to be happy doing this. I DJ, I want to direct. And science is stupid.”

“Don’t let Max let you hear that. You might crush his heart.”

“Ah, yes, his one true love.” Nino rolls his eyes and smiles back. And at least that, of everything, is genuine.

Maybe it wouldn’t be if Adrien said… if he admitted. Maybe it’s all just another lie and betrayal.

That Nino will look at these memories and be disgusted with how Adrien can smile back. How he hoards and manipulates Nino’s time and affection as if he’s entitled to those emotions.

Adrien knows it’s not great, these lies and secrets, and he doesn’t ever want Nino to be hurt. Especially not from him, but, but what is he supposed to do? He can’t lose Nino. Not like with Ladybug. He can’t let the secrets out if that’s going to be how it ends.

Adrien stamps down his sigh, stamps down the rising sadness and flush of heat, he’s at school. This is the normal place, like Nino said. Nice and predictable. No issues with his family. No press. No Chat Noir. It’s just him being an ordinary teenager with a bunch of other ordinary teenagers.

“Did anyone here know about the akuma this morning?” Alya groans from her seat, pinching the bridge of her nose. And the ordinariness crumbles apart.

“It was a giant toddler.” Nino says, tone totally flattening, and Adrien glances over at how tense he’s become. “Just let it go Als.”

“Easy for you,” She slumps in her seat. “Everyone keeps asking about the one before it. That messed up Chat Noir and Ladybug.”

“Someone should figure it out soon,” Mylene scratches at her fingers and leans into Ivan’s side. “With everything that happened with Ladybug afterwards and Chat Noir just left…”

Ivan mutters a reassurance to her as Kim shrugs, “It’s Chat Noir though. He could take freaking anyone with or without Ladybug.”

“And he’s way too kind,” Nathenial throws in, pencil tapping as he bites his lip. “He doesn’t just abandon people even with their thing.”

Adrien curls a little bit. He certainly doesn’t feel kind.

“And we don’t know what happened.” Nino twists in his seat to glare at Alya, and Adrien can’t reach out to squeeze his arm or- or do anything to offer comfort. “Everyone has bad days, we don’t need to pry into it.”

“That’s literally my job-”

“And you don’t need to be so pushy-”

“Oh, oh, you wanna get into-”

“Hey, come on guys,” Adrien lifts his hands up, “They’re superheroes. If they can bounce back from some of those nasty akumas then they can recover from this.”

“Sure,” Max snorts, “If you ignore the statics that most organizations and groups fall apart from the inside.”

Kim huffs, “Maybe statics don’t apply to superheroes.”

“They’re people too and liable to faults then.”

“Hey!” Alya snaps at him, “They’re working their butts off though, the things Ladybug’s done-”

“Excuse you,” Nathenial crosses his arms, “What about Chat Noir?”

Mylene scratches at her wrist. “But he hasn’t been Chat Noir for a while. He’s been the bee hero and it’s been pretty rough and now this…”

Ivan nods, “I’d be at my wits end too.”

“Which Hawk Moth would know, so, statically-” Max puffs up a little at Kim- “He’d use that to push them and ruin their team dynamic. It’s the only smart thing to do since he should be well aware by this point that akumas can’t get to them.”

“Well then why doesn’t he just akumatize Chat Noir then if he’s being so emotional?” Kim fires back, “He’s fucking scary without that so if he wanted to be smart that’s what he’d do.”

“Chat Noir is destruction itself!” Adrien glares at Kim, hand pulsing. “Anything that close to him that he doesn’t want to won’t even be ash.”

Mylene tenses up at that and everyone’s gaze flicks over to Nino, who’s shoulders start rising up at the sudden attention. But shouldn’t that be a good thing? That Chat Noir- Adrien- will always be there? That nothing can stop him? Not even ground itself? Shouldn’t that be reassuring?

Adrien destroys pain. Suffering and hurt. That’s all Hawk Moth’s thing, he takes that away.

He’s one of the good guys. He’s a hero!

“It’s just, you know,” Mylene’s still glancing at Nino, “It doesn’t seem real, what he can do. What he is.”

Ivan shivers and holds her tighter, “I can’t imagine-”

“Hey,” Nino frowns at them, “You weren’t there! You weren’t there, you just saw it on tv. I was in that and I was perfectly safe, and you didn’t hear Chat Noir afterwards! He’s just a person trying to keep Paris safe and that’s fucking stressful.”

Adrien clenches his jaw. Would Nino be so eager to defend him if he knew? Would Nino be so reassured if Adrien let his transformation collapse that day? That it’s just Adrien with the packed schedule and generally confused about everything and doesn’t know how to handle relationships and is now jeopardizing Paris with his thing with Ladybug right now and would Nino feel safe? Knowing he’s Chat Noir?

“He did tear the akuma apart.” Max comments, “We’ve only seen him do that after Copy Cat-”

“I was there for that too! And, yeah, I’d be fucking pissed too.”

Nathenial shrugs, “But, it’s not really safe for other people if he gets angry. You know? Like what if-”

“Okay,” Alya huffs, “What ifs is a dangerous road to go now.”

Max lifts a finger. “But the probability of Chat Noir being something other than human is prominent during those cases. Point one being how he could control a mass of destruction that was formerly his arm and then reform it. Point two being that the dialogue and actions during Copy Cat was very much so deviated from his normal actions. Point three is the other inhuman capabilities he has, including, but not limited to, purring, strength, flexibility, night vision, and resistance.”

“That doesn’t make him inhuman though.” Adrien leans forward on his seat, fighting the urge to stand or massage his hand. “Those are just his powers.”

“But, you know,” Alya frowns, “That doesn’t really explain that second point.”

“Not everything can be perfectly explained-!”

“Whoa,” Alix blinks as she enters, “Chloe isn’t even in here guys.”

“See! Chloe!” Kim makes a sharp jab, “She was transformed when Hawk Moth got to her! He can be akumatized.”

God, they’re back to this then. But, technically, shouldn’t that prove he’s still human then? That he can be akumatized?

Alya snorts, “You want to compare fucking Chloe to Ladybug and Chat Noir? They’re nothing alike!”

“Hey!” Pollen’s blinking awake on his shoulder flying up, “That’s my chosen!”

“But it is possible,” Max mutters, “If Chat Noir doesn’t notice or doesn’t have-”

“Would never happen! Since, if you all remember, Chloe only was the bee hero for one day.” Adrien clenches his fists, trying to control himself, to control the crackling of heat and power coming from the ring that he can’t handle right now. The tense heat in his throat and buzzing and his shoulder. “And her mother was an akuma literally hours before! Which she had to watch! Of course she was emotional and couldn’t even use her powers to help her, Chat Noir hasn’t had anything like that happen to him! It might be possible for it to happen, but he wouldn’t let it.”

Lila slides in, “Chat Noir? You guys talking about the fight he and Ladybug had?”

Everyone whips to her, her and those stupid awful fake curious and innocent eyes gleaming in the attention, and Alya chair scraps as she stands. Phone already out. “You know what happened? Did you see it?”

“I didn’t, but one of my friends did.” Lila sighs, all fake, all just a ploy to get people sympathetic and willing to do her bidding. All for the attention. “Poor thing. She was terrified.”

“But Chat Noir has and will never hurt anyone!” Adrien yells, harshly breathes out to control his volume. “He wouldn’t! He’s a hero!”

“But-” Mylene squeaks- “If it does ever happen-”

“And he can get affected by akuma hits.” Kim throws out.

“Simply disastrous,” Lila finishes, “Him existing is simply a risk to all of Paris.”

“Come on!” Nathenial scowls at them, “Have you all forgotten that he’s personally responsible for saving, like, all of us at some point or another?”

“That is true,” Max pulls up something on his phone. “Chat Noir has spent a total of 94.2% engaging with an akuma during the total time one exists, with an error margin of a 5.1% since it can be hard to tell when exactly an akuma appears. But still, that’s higher than Ladybug with 86.8%. And he’s only been totally absent during one, uh, one akumatization.”

Adrien clenches his jaw, since he was there for Father’s akumatization he just couldn’t DO anything, and rather than trying to figure out a response he just looks down at his desk.

And even in that case that doesn’t make him any less of a hero! That doesn’t make him a failure or violent or anything else. Adrien can wield a miraculous, and he does a good job of it. He can be responsible for the kwamis and keep them safe and keep Paris safe and not fall apart while doing it. He can!

“Dude’s probably exhausted then,” Alix says, “Or maybe he’s getting in trouble for always sneaking away. Who knows.”

“We should!” Alya huffs, “But at this rate we won’t be getting an interview with them.”

Lila hums, “I wonder what they’re trying to hide then, since otherwise why wouldn’t they take the chance to tell us that Chat Noir isn’t a threat? Maybe they know they’ll get caught in a lie.”

“What-” Nathenial starts, but then flinches once turning towards her and almost chews his lip off.

“It’s not a bad point,” Mylene mutters, “Why doesn’t he want to tell us?”

“You guys don’t get it!” Adrien barks, “You don’t understand what the press does. How they shape and twist until your image fits their purpose. Chat Noir and Ladybug should avoid it! You wouldn’t be hearing their words, you’d be hearing someone’s opinions about their words!”

“Pssh, don’t bother telling the peasants this.” Chloe strides in, flicking a hand in their direction. “They won’t understand the complexities.”

“What complexities?” Alya snarls, “Because usually I find people trying to hide all their dirty secrets.”

“Pah-ease, if I answered any of those incessant reporters about Queen Bee then your precious heroes might be considered enemies of the state.” Chloe smirks at her, “And that’s the truth of reporters.”

Alya scowls and Alix snorts at her, “What could they possibly be asking?”

“Weapon possibilities. Recreation possibilities. If anyone could wield them.” Chloe shrugs, “Nice things like that.”

“Oof,” Kim shivers, “It’s scary enough with Chat Noir, but if-”

“Chat Noir wouldn’t hurt-” Adrien flings his arms out, how many times will he have to repeat this and reaffirm that he is a hero, and he whacks his water bottle. Where it cracks apart. Because of course it does.

Whatever. Adrien stands and picks up the mess, at least this will give him the excuse of stepping out of here. And-

He frowns at the water dissolving as it runs over his fingers, the crack only growing before he throws it away.

“Here, Adrien, you can use my-”

Adrien waves Mylene’s offer aside. “I’ll just grab paper towels from the bathroom.” Once he steps out, he immediately checks if there’s people and hisses, “Pollen, can you wake up Plagg?”

She flies up as he forces smiles and excuses himself through groups, Plagg groaning and grumbling and trying to bury himself deeper and Pollen yells louder at him.

“What’s even the big deal?” Plagg eventually floats down, “You wouldn’t be like this with an akuma.”

“The problem is that the ring is out of control!” Pollen snaps.

“I told you,” Plagg scowls, “It isn’t hurting Adrien! Nothing like what you did to him.”

“That was not Pollen’s fault, Plagg,” Adrien hisses as he gets into the bathroom, thankfully empty this close to class starting. “You know that.”

“Doesn’t change the fact you suffered for it.”

“And now we’re past that, and I for one am thankful that Pollen’s around.” He gives her a smile, and it’s a relief for how easy and natural this one can come to him.

He tries not to think about the false reality, where they took Pollen from him, her face when the miraculous clattered to the ground, how she was about to yell or cry when Adrien turned around to keep running and her miraculous taken.

“Aw, I am glad to be here too, my King.”

Plagg groans, “It was better when I didn’t have to hear all of this sappy conversation.”

“Well, too bad,” Adrien starts pulling the paper towels. “The ring might not be hurting me but just touching my water bottle was causing it to disintegrate. Care to comment?”

“Uh… you know, not really.”

“We have a serious problem on our hands if destruction is leaking into the world without control.” Pollen frowns at him. “Can you even sense if it’s happening?”

“Okay, I was asleep, but also no. The locker thing felt normal enough.”

Adrien sighs as he bunches the paper towels to shove into his pocket. “Maybe I can figure out a rune of Pollen’s or something and put it on these gloves.” Which, as Adrien glances at it, there’s holes developing around the finger, just a little hard to see with how his skin’s black there. “It might contain it.”

“Okay great,” Plagg nods, “We have a plan, we can handle it. It’s all good.”

“Oh yeah,” Adrien takes off his sunglasses to rub at his eyes. “Only have to get through today and the akuma that’s of course going to get sent out.”

“Hey, but you’ll be with me now, Kit, and we’re going to absolutely tear them apart.”

Adrien huffs, that argument with the class too fresh. “Which might not be a good thing! Some people don’t even see me as human…”

He trails off when he catches sight of himself in the mirror. Two slitted eyes staring back at him.

Notes:

Man, I've wanted to write a class argument for SO long now. Did it run away from me a little? Yes, but you can pry my dialogue heavy chapters out of my cold, dead hands.

Chapter 14: Zombizou

Notes:

If you can’t tell by the length, I had fun with this one 😄

Chloe lets him keep the clothes, with the promise to go shopping and having a day out with her and Sabrina tomorrow. Which he is immensely looking forward to. There will be eyes, but they’ll expect people like Chloe and him to do things like this, it won’t be gossip. They’ve done this for years. It’s nice and familiar and good. None of them will bring up any of this stupid miraculous stuff either.

He knows that if he looks at it- the LadyBlog or any number of online discussions- wondering why Chat Noir only showed up at the very end. Separating the akuma and, since this was a destructive based akuma anyway, leaving Ladybug to do the restoration on her own. Gossip and articles about why he isn’t talking to anyone, not his team or victim or press, or why he wasn’t in the battle.

Adrien was there the whole time- his baton loaded with unread messages and missed calls from everyone- making sure they could handle the fight, but he’s just not ready to face Labybug and the others right now. Not when he, technically, broke into a store to steal colored contacts to fix his eyes when Plagg couldn’t.

So, thieving and staying out of akuma fights too? Plus whatever happened with their powers? Yeah, no, he isn’t facing her. He just can’t. He can’t be with her. He can’t be with Nino right now. He can’t be alone in that cold room either. There’s just too much he can’t handle right now. Too much he just can’t think about. Too much he has to do. Too much he can’t.

Maybe she won’t outright attack him, but she did make it obvious that night that she does not want to see him wearing the ring. And Adrien doesn’t know now how far she’ll tolerate it before attacking him again.

Or, not again, for the first time. She hasn’t done that yet. She hasn’t actually crossed that line. She’s just there. At it.

Maybe he should have gone to Juleka’s place. Most of his school friends are there having fun and probably talking about this and he could be there and forget about this, but he’s down here and planning to spend the entire night curled in his hideout.

“Okay,” Adrien flops down on what Plagg has titled the ‘floor nest’. “I think I’m done.”

Plagg stretches and yawns and curls up tighter on the cushion. “Good for you, don’t wake me.”

Adrien first rolls his eyes at Plagg sleeping down here, but after a moment of thinking, he could also take a little nap down here too. The pile of cushions and blankets and pillows probably isn’t great for his back or other body parts, but it’s better than pulling anymore all-nighters down here. And it’s been an exhausting day for them, balancing the destruction pushing out of him. Trying to control it now that it’s so much more wild than before.

Plagg shut down when Adrien asked what exactly happened that caused this. Just telling him if he gets a chance to figure out who Ladybug is, he should take it. Pollen can’t tell him because of some order rule, but apparently he should find out himself.

But he… he doesn’t want to at the moment. He wants her away. As separate as he possibly can push her away.

“A nap does seem wise,” Pollen stretches out too. “You haven’t gotten enough sleep as of late, my King.”

“How could you all sleep?” Gigga’s looking over all his desk, staring at the open page of the turtle miraculous. “Look at all this!”

At least someone’s excited that he’s been trying to learn.

“Well, you can look through anything you like.” Adrien yawns, “You can ask me about anything once I get up.”

Adrien wakes with a gasp with what feels like an instant later, and checking at his phone, he only managed to sleep for a couple of hours. He’s still so incredibly tired. And, tragically when he can’t get his thoughts and heart to calm down, he doesn’t think he has anything with caffeine down here.

Tired and awake. That sucks.

He can do something down here at least, after setting an alarm for when he needs to go back home though. Fine tune the few crude systems that keep his little hideout functional, a bathroom and a manual pump for water pressure- thankfully his baton can just store liquid and only needed one trip to fill up the modest tank- and a bunch of batteries to keep the place well lit.

The disco ball can’t really spin, but he does love it and doesn’t want to mess that up. Adrien only needs to turn the flashlight on and the whole place lights up. Well enough for him to see, at least. Other people that don’t have cat eyes may think differently. But he also has some fairy lights if he needs more.

Yet, with light, water, a bathroom, a large supply of various snack foods, the only other thing that would be nice would be a shower or more reliable sources of electricity. Maybe he can think about that.

But he even has a tv with a little contraption that makes his phone into one, so maybe not. He really doesn’t need to do anything more to settle into this place.

This place was only supposed to be for all things superhero related, or anything else he doesn’t want his Father to know about, for him to see and treasure. Now it’s his refuge, his place to hide away from the world.

The mirror on the wall, with some extra lights, briefly snags his attention. Adrien would love to keep experimenting with his transformation. It’s the safest part of his powers to manipulate, and Adrien believes that if it can naturally protect him from the physical world then that protection should extend to the magic Hawk Moth tries to manipulate them with.

Even if he can’t do that, or if it’s something only possible with Wayzz, then it would at least be nice to change his suit to adapt to his surroundings in real time. Strengthening parts before a hit, maybe making it brighter or glowing if others can’t see him, even if he could sharpen or retract his claws.

Or, perhaps, he can transform to look like a completely ordinary person. And just… go out, like a normal person. Not as a hero. Not as a famous model. As long as he doesn’t call cataclysm or perform feats of superhuman powers, no one could tell with the glamor in place.

And that’s just another great reason to tell Nino. If Adrien can be someone separate from Chat Noir and Adrien Agreste, then they can just go out.

Or for his sanity now, if he simply learns how the powers flow through him, maybe he can better control what’s happening to the ring now. He managed to break his stylus and a pen, before moving onto pencils that snapped way too easily but at least Nino wasn’t giving him open looks of concern.

Adrien forcibly pushes thoughts of Nino out of his head. He can’t think about him, about what he’s feeling as Carapace, what Wayzz might be telling him, the fact that the Challenge is once again tomorrow, and so much more that Adrien doesn’t even know because it’s getting difficult to talk to him without feeling so guilty because, shit, Adrien took the bracelet and he didn’t ask and what if his mom came in and he was just frozen there-

No, no, not thinking about it.

God, why couldn’t he have at least a day of without this? When Simon Says happened that should have been the worst of it. And, oh yeah, Adrien supposes he does have a lot to journal and keep track of since he hasn’t done that really since Sunday. That’s better than waking up Plagg.

Since, if Plagg wants to sleep, then Adrien will let him sleep. Especially after today. This whole week.

Instead, Adrien heads over to his desk where Gigga’s fallen asleep at. Smiling at them, he gently takes them over to the floor nest where they curl up a bit tighter. These poor kwamis, he appreciates their help so much and just wishes he can give them an easier time.

Shaking his head from that, Adrien grabs a bar to eat and gets to work. He’s switched how he does this a little, starting up three new notebooks as to dedicate one each kwami, with his copy of the miraculous book on overall abilities. He meant to actually do a little more of this before his nap, instead organizing and setting up his pictures in this little hideout since even the thought of doing that then was way too daunting. But hopefully well-rested and now with plenty of space to organize his thoughts, eventually he will throw in some personal details rather keep it in his dream journal/dairy, he can get through what he learned this week without breaking down.

After he does that long enough where it takes conscious force to relax his muscles, Adrien shuts those and looks to work on something else. He at least got through everything about Plagg and the ring, managing to go through the sensing and the new purge ability he really wishes he had time to go into more and the physical toil the stealing took, and a bit about Pollen’s transformation change as well. But the breaking point was Gigga’s abilities.

He ends up sliding out his copy of the miraculous book.

Staring at it, frowning, Adrien still doesn’t know why Father has it. Okay, he can make a decent guess because he knows Father and Mother used to take a lot of trips into remote parts of the world with Nathalie. What he can’t figure out is why wouldn’t Father bring the book to Ladybug? Sure, it’s in code, but the pictures show the ring and earrings and necklace and bracelet that correlate with all the heroes! They don’t exactly advertise their miraculous, but it’s obvious enough looking at any akuma fights.

But, until Adrien figures out a way to bring it up without upsetting Father or getting himself punished, he’ll just let it lie. It’s not like even if Father did bring it forward Ladybug would want anything to do with it. Not since she has plenty of information from that bastard.

And now he’s getting really close to cracking this code. Pollen made the point that they can read and understand all languages no matter how they’re coded, but since all the kwamis under a spell or other magic ritual that keeps him from reading it to Adrien, not even able to remember it a few minutes later. Which made him realize a loophole. None of them have to read it, they can just write out paragraphs in the code.

It's a bit of a bumpy process, if only because Adrien hasn’t quite figured out the grammar and every few minutes the pencil falls from Plagg’s grasp or is annihilated and that doesn’t even touch his horrible penmenship, but direct translations are already opening so, so many opportunities. And he has enough of it to make pretty good progress without Plagg writing anything out.

There’s a lot, a lot of warnings in the book. Especially with the ring, but for a lot of the other heroes as well. Of Wayzz’s bracelet cutting through people’s arms. Of the madness Trixx can produce as human brains writhe if their perception of the world is too deluded. Of the rapid swarm Mullo can bring about. Of the extra measures imbued into the miraculous so that even less of their powers go through.

So, Adrien can admit he might have been too hard on this old organization. Clearly, they had good reason to be afraid. Though the kwamis are nothing but helpful so if they just talked and slowly worked this stuff out then they wouldn’t have had a reason to be afraid.

But it is still unnerving, the sudden stop of the pages. When Adrien flips the page in the middle of translating a potion that makes it easier for miraculous powers to mesh and then it’s blank despite how cool and important that information would be. Cut off abruptly when this organization disappeared without a trace.

Adrien can’t even tell how long. Plagg mentions landmarks and formations not around anymore. Was the miraculous forged even before humanity spread everywhere? When they were all still in Africa? There wouldn’t necessarily be any remnants of the civilization powered on the backs of kwamis, there wouldn’t be any need.

They had teleportation at their fingertips, food that can simply be willed into existence, enemies and predators destroyed or tamed. Shields to prevent fires and floods and then gone the next instant. Vivid stories played out in 3D. Control over animals. Even the most violent and depressed could be brought happiness. They wouldn’t need to make anything permanent for themselves. It would be paradise. More glorious than any religion could imagine.

Yet, clearly, if such a time existed, there was still something that managed to wipe it from history. Maybe there are people and families out there that protect a miraculous and keep it secret out of fear or greed. After all, there’s still nine miraculous out there that he can’t summon, that are lost in the world.

Considering that Plagg doesn’t know how he got to Adrien rather than just feeling the dimension weaken and he could push his way out, very conveniently right after Hawk Moth somehow got a hold of Nooroo, it’s all just a bunch of questions as to how when there wasn’t someone who had the ring to call catastrophe.

Maybe it was all their own undoing. There’s a brief section here talking about creating kwamis, dubbed Renlings, that would specifically have domain over a human value rather than a concept. It’s not a long section and, well, considering how it ended, it doesn’t look like it was a great idea. Something about how the transformation turned the wielder into an animal and how most would lose other human aspects.

Justice becomes uncompromising, no empathy or compassion to change decisions and can hinge towards revenge. And that’s just one example. Courage gets to the point of self-sacrificing. Similar story with compassion.

So, Adrien’s going to steer clear trying to make his own miraculous. He just wants to use his to the best ability that he can.

Either way, a lot of it talks about force of will and how to use potions and rituals to further direct these powers. Which, now that’s something Adrien can get behind. Which would be super helpful right now. While the text doesn’t explain what some of the ingredients are (Adrien’s not even sure if some of these creatures are still around- like a dragon, a legit dragon?) he at least has something to go on.

It also means he writes himself a note to get more equipment down here, like some type of large battery or propane burner, since boiling water is a requirement and there’s no way he could hide potion brewing from Father and Nathalie in his room.

But, with all of the kwamis still snoozing away, Adrien just keeps with translating. He’s finished enough that he gets the gist, and he’ll have to do experimentation anyway to figure out the assumptions in the explanations, but he’ll round it out and then take a few hour nap before heading back home for the morning.  

Just in case, he sets two timers and hopes that he sleeps long enough to need them.

 

Mr. Pigeon is never a great way to start a morning, the implications of Hawk Moth studying them, but expected. Other than clearing souls and helping with restoration,  Adrien only came out of the shadows when an akuma dubbed Mother- Fu’s only Adrien’s 2^nd most hated person since what he even what he did doesn’t compare to the rage Adrien feels at how Hawk Moth took advantage of a mom panicking from losing her kid- to catch the child when the towering akuma with way too many eyes dropped the child.

So Hawk Moth knows something’s up. All of Paris does, but fuck Hawk Moth. Fuck them all. This is his life. He owes them nothing. He’s already done so much.

He’s just so tired. And stressed. And he can barely even talk to Nino, he can’t to Ladybug, Chloe’s can in a very limited sense, the kwamis either don’t know or just try to get him to rest or eat.

Which eating’s nice. Adrien can always eat, but he can only get sleep during his naps.

And now Rose is asking if Chloe got a gift for Miss Bustier and how can it only be Monday? It must be at least Thursday for how done he is with this week already.

Still, Adrien pulls his phone to text her that it’s alright if she doesn’t have a gift. Miss Bustier isn’t entitled to a gift from her, and furthermore, he knows that Miss Bustier already loves that Chloe isn’t bad mouthing or picking on people nearly as much even if she’s still cheating. He words it differently, but he’s sure that she still gets it.

It was a little awkward when Miss Bustier personally thanked him for being a good influence on her and being such a good friend. Since, if anything, it’s Chloe who’s been there for him over and over again and he doesn’t really do much in return.

Anyway, it’s not like Adrien got her anything particularly amazing either. It’s a gift card for Gabriel with a note congratulating her for having a baby and cheering her on because he knows she’ll be a great parent. It feels a little hollow compared to the other highly sentimental gifts the others have (Marinette literally made her gift and judging from the exhaustion and wild hair it took a great deal of time), but he knows how expensive good menstrual clothes can be so hopefully that can take some of the edge off her. 

But Chloe, well, he knows why she wants to forget all about birthdays. And she would kill him if he explained it to the class.

“Shut up!” Sabrina steps in front of Chloe, “Chloe just doesn’t do birthdays, what so wrong with that?”

Marinette mutters about her being heartless. Which, ouch, hopefully Chloe-

“I do to have a heart! And I have the means to get a second one if I wanted to! Unlike all you poor peasants!” Chloe glares at them all as the bell rings, everyone shuffling out.

He tries to give her a smile as he follows Nino out, and he wouldn’t be surprised if she decides to skip this next class to show everyone that she doesn’t have to follow the rules. Honestly, if it wasn’t for the fact he needs to have perfect attendance when he can because of what he does as Chat Noir, he’d be compelled to skip with her just to have some time to destress. To not worry about school assignments on top of everything else.

But he can’t. Or else Father will pull him out of school and he will never be able to sneak away to be Chat Noir.

Besides, if it’s true that Chloe’s never given a present before, then what’s the big deal about it this year? Why even bring it up? Miss Bustier wouldn’t expect it anyway, and she isn’t the kind of person to take it out on Chloe.

It feels wrong then, that Chloe’s still getting punished for it. That the past can’t just stay there.

He texts her that he’s free this Saturday afternoon, if she wants to go on a mega splurge. He enjoyed it this last weekend so why not? He doubts Ladybug wants him around for patrolling and Father approves of it.

“Is it always like this on birthdays?”

Not getting an answer from Nino, Adrien nudges him and just continues walking until he sees that his boyfriend is staring blankly. He can’t be talking to Wayzz, Nino doesn’t have enough control over his face to hide that if Adrien’s looking.

It’s not like this is a weird face, but it way tenser than his normal zoning off face when he gets into his music. Maybe it has to do with the superhero situation. There’s just so many things that one constantly has to consider as a permanent hero. And since Adrien avoided their Sunday patrol, he doesn’t even know how that went. Only that Nino is still wearing the bracelet.

“Earth to Nino-” Adrien elbows him, frowning- “You alright?”

“Huh?” Nino whips his head towards him, side stepping from him a bit. Which, maybe that’s also a miraculous thing. Adrien was more jumpy after wearing the ring for a while. And certainly this past week.

“You’re all spacy, just seeing if you’re good.” Adrien smiles at him, “If you’re not, just let me know and I’ll cover you in science.”

Nino huffs and gives him a smile back, “Thanks man, appreciate it. Oh, hey Juleka, I’ve been meaning to ask…”

Blinking as Nino runs off and disappears into the classroom, Adrien is just about to follow when Lila’s too thick perfume once again crowds into his space.

“Lila,” His smile stiffens on his face when he turns to her, “Good morning.”

“Good morning Adrien!” Lila brightens further when she looks at him. “You look like you’ve slept so well! Did my trick work?”

“It-” Adrien internally sighs. Out of all the Chat Noir abilities he can tap into normally, voice projection and intimidation just isn’t one. It’s tragic.

He clears his throat, “I slept well because-”

“Yay!” She leans into him, and he stiffens up before politely stepping away from her. “I’m so glad I could help! Just come find me if you need anything else. Trust me, I know the pains, I get it, and I’m here for you if you need anything.”

“Oh, uh…”

“I’m sorry,” Lila steps away with a sheepish shrug, “I promised Rose I’d help her out with one of her projects. I’ll talk to you later though!”

With a strut, smooth and yet a slightly joyful vibe as she bounces her shoulders subtly, Adrien takes one look at everyone glancing at them and lowers his head before darting into the classroom. Which he partly hates, because it looks like he’s chasing after her and he knows that she raised her voice for everyone to hear, but whatever. If she feels good getting attention like this and it isn’t hurting anyone, fine.

Adrien can’t care. Let her do it, whatever. Lila’s drama only becomes his issue if a miraculous somehow gets involved.

Nino isn’t at his seat when he gets in, still hovering around Juleka as Lila comes up to Rose.

Adrien’s feelings about being bummed for sitting by himself for a few minutes- despite the stern mental reminders that he is not entitled to Nino’s time and how dare he feel that way when Adrien’s practically betraying him all the time- dissolve once Nino goes to tuck his hat more firmly on his head once he spots Lila.

He’s on his feet before he even has a plan. But if Nino’s uncomfortable around her for some reason, even if it’s just the way too heavy perfume, Adrien will give him an excuse to leave. Nino can grab Juleka later.

“Hey, so-”

“Adrien!” Lila chuckles, high and brazen to his ears. “I told you I’d talk to you later! But maybe you can help, Rose was curious to about what Prince Ali’s up to. You’ve met him right? I mean, you’re both just so much alike that I’m sure you’d hit it off!”

“Um, yeah, I have.” Prince Ali was kind, perhaps stifled and a little exhausted, but it was clear he loved helping and talking about sick children. A lot better than some of the other ‘royals’ he’s met.

He glances over at Rose, maybe that’s part of the reason she is so enamored by him.

Shaking his head, he opens his mouth to ask if he can pull Nino aside-

“That’s right!” Lila snaps, “We met him together recently, oh how silly of me to forget that! I was just so caught up with the charity work we were doing.”

She smiles at him, too sickeningly sweet, and Adrien realizes that he’s only met Prince Ali as Chat Noir. While he wasn’t lying, it’s apparent that Lila believes that and is trying to use it to her advantage. Though technically the Gabriel brand did some charity work in collaboration so, whatever, he can say something about that.

But, really, Adrien still just doesn’t care.

“Yeah, we didn’t see much of each other during that. But why don’t you tell Rose all about it?” He grins back and throws an arm around Nino, “Anyway, sorry ladies, but I’ve got to steal Nino away.”

Juleka snorts softly, a smile tugging up on her lips.

He doesn’t really give Lila to say anything else, her smile got a little strained but who cares, before he steers them both away, leaning closer to Nino so they can’t pick up on it. “Sorry if I overstepped, it just looked like you were uncomfortable.”

“I was,” Nino turns away and tries to lower the bill of his hat. “So, uh, thanks man.”

He pulls away to sit down, which Adrien tries not to let him bother him. Nino hasn’t said he’s uncomfortable with the touching, but maybe he’s nervous since Adrien’s been prickly about it. It’s not like Nino’s past week has been that great either.

Adrien frowns down at the table, he really hopes that Nino hasn’t had a nightmare. Those are the worst. Even when you can get over it mentally, your body doesn’t and it just eats away hours of sleep.

Just when he has an idea on how to bring up his nightmare preventative tricks, class starts and they don’t really get a chance to talk. Especially when Adrien’s unwilling to make Nino anymore uncomfortable.

And that, unfortunately, continues for the rest of the day.

It’s a rare day when Adrien’s allowed to eat lunch with the others, but he always appreciates Nino’s long-suffering sigh or how he says that it’s just not the same without him each day. Or how he’ll always chat with Adrien between classes or asking when he’s free again or just resuming their past conversation like no time has passed and he’s dying to continue talking about it.

Adrien assumed that the jokes would be gone today with Nino shying away from contact. Which is fine! As much as he loves it, he doesn’t want to ever pressure Nino into that and they typically only get away with joking around by tilting in towards each other.

But for all of that to go away? It reminds of him right after the Horrifactor incident. Adrien’s rather sure now that Nino was all flustered and tense due to him getting a crush on him- he immediately gets all warm and then cold because Nino’s great and Adrien just isn’t- and not this. Whatever this is.

He can’t even cheer him up as Chat Noir. And even if he could it would feel like a betrayal once Nino knows that Adrien’s been using his other identity to coax information out of him. There’s just no good solution through any of this.

At least he’s happier along with everyone else when they get to Miss Bustier’s class. It’s hard not to be when they’ll get to watch her open her gifts.

A happiness that quickly shatters when Miss Bustier opens Marinette’s graffitied gift.

Adrien winces on Chloe’s behalf, he has no clue how she can sit there with a straight back and an uncaring expression when he knows better, from all the bitter remarks that her classmates throw at her and even the whispers coming from Mylene and Rose. The only thing that even starts to break her mask, a mere twitch of her eyebrow, is when Lila says that it’s wrong to treat anger with anger.

That time, he can keep his face straight, if only since his fist is clenched tight. Lila’s crossing a line to use a low point of Chloe’s to make herself look better.

There’s a crackle of energy at the ring, the skin around it blackening for a moment before Plagg hums sleepily on his head and it goes away. But a few fine cracks appear in the desk anyway.

“Calm down everyone!” Miss Bustier claps her hands. “The classroom is not a place for insults and defamation. Now, Marinette, may I please speak with you for a moment?”

The silence that follows might be out of respect for Miss Bustier or from the absolute shock and devastation hitting Marinette. The Marinette who is the kind and always comes through for everyone getting called out by the teacher.

Actually, that’s stupid. Marinette’s not getting punished for this. Even though Chloe does have sway here because of her father, Miss Bustier wouldn’t punish Marinette for it. She just likely can’t get away with punishing Chloe and just wants to speak with Marinette one on one about this. Calmly. Without the entire class there and expressing feelings on this.

Still, Adrien knows he’s going to have to talk to Chloe. She’s come a far way, no longer calling for her father to get out of anything she doesn’t want to do, and he thinks it’s proof that she just didn’t do this on her own initiative to belittle Marinette like how he saw her do in the beginning of the year. Even though even just the topic of birthdays around her would have made her upset.

Adrien’s confident that if no one asked her directly about the birthday gift, she wouldn’t have batted an eye about it.

Though Chloe needs a better outlet since this is really bad. And she honestly needs someone more than him because Adrien can’t be there… for anyone. Let alone her. Chloe could get a therapist but then her father gets all weird when he thinks she’s sad and he’s not enough so he just buys things and basically pleads with her to be alright because stupid politics and whatever issues he has so now he’s back at square one.

Ugh, thinking about Chloe’s problems feels just as terrible as thinking about his. Nothing can be simple.

When did he consider them to be such broken people? Weren’t they fine a year ago? Wasn’t most of this still there though? What changed so much?

The whole class is still muttering and murmuring when he snaps upright at the sharp gasp and cry. It’s Marinette, and that’s not right. Whatever’s happening is not right.

“I think, I don’t think Marinette’s in the headspace to talk calmly with Miss Bustier, I’m going to talk to them.” He slips from the desk, gaining the attention of his kwamis- actually Plagg’s still asleep on his head but Gigga was snooping through people’s stuff and Pollen staring at Chloe- even though he really doesn’t have a plan.

“Wait,” Alya calls, and she’s probably going to say something to him later when he flat out ignores her to go outside.

“No!” Marinette’s thrashing in the hallways, the figure- Miss Bustier- incased in a frothing purple. “Please! Let go-”

“Marinette!”

A zombie-type themed akuma merges planting a kiss on Marinette’s cheek before turning to him- Marinette’s now looking at him too, a too big grin on her face as her eyes gleam pink- and Adrien immediately backpedals before slamming the door shut behind him.

“We’ve got to evacuate and send the alarm!” Adrien flinches despite himself when he hears Miss Bustier’s voice call for Chloe. “Miss Bustier was akumatized and did something to Mari-”

The akuma kicks and Adrien grunts and throws his weight back, pulling on the ring- “Whoa! Kit!”- and holds the door shut.

“But it’s only been a minute-”

Mylene makes a good point. Adrien remembers how last week he was freaking out how maybe he was leaking destruction and causing people here to akumatize easier and this is really a terrible moment to be reminded of that when everything’s so much worse.

  “Hawk Moth doesn’t care!” Alya’s got her phone out, thankfully the alarm blaring moments later. “Out the windows everyone!”

“We’re on the second-”

The crash interrupts Nathenial. The door splintering and throwing him forward, most definitely ruining this jacket, sorry Father, and he quickly rolls away as the akuma jumps in.

“Class has been canceled!” The akuma throws their arms up. “We’re going on a field trip to instead hug and kiss everyone and spread the love.”

“Without asking permission?” Adrien grabs a chunk of the splintered doorframe, jumping to his feet and swinging as the akuma tries to blow a kiss. “I’d certainly love to get you a dictionary, you’re out of date!”

Plagg’s groaning, Adrien’s inhaling the strength as he bows back to avoid her snatching hands and then kick right into her jaw to send those stupid kissing lips far, far away from him.

“What am I saying?” Adrien immediately backpedals, trying to gesture people to get through the freaking door while he’s distracting her. “You’re not just out of date. You’re practically using a dead language!”

“Poor sheltered Adrien-” Oh boy does he really hate the sound of that- “You clearly haven’t been shown enough affection. If you’d just let me-”

“I prefer gift-giving!” He blurts, shoving one of her gifts in her face. “And- hey! Dude!”

Nino basically body slams the akuma before grabbing his arm and yanking him towards the door- everyone else got out, good, good- as the akuma hums particularly displeased with them.

“Don’t you dare dude me when you decided to just fight- shit shit-”

They don’t take a few steps before running into another class spilling out, Marinette among them and they have that same gleam as they lurch towards them. And, that’s really bad how they’re mingling with the evacuees and the screaming increases ten-fold.

“LEFT!” Gigga blurts.

“Well I-” Adrien pivots in front and kicks the left one back before they start running the opposite direction- “Have plenty of self-defense skills!”

“Against akumas?!”

“Same principle of using their momentum against them!” But, considering how he isn’t Chat Noir and even with the boost from the ring, the akuma is walking out all fine despite that nasty hit to the jaw. “Just maybe not as effective.”

Nino huffs, giving off a high nervous laugh, as they both run. Adrien glances behind him. A very necessary action as he now has to tackle Nino out of the way from the flying black kisses of death and also a very regrettable action since he now looks on with horror at how now the place they were running towards is now very much so full of the pink eyed infected.

Adrien gets right back on his feet, so glad that savate is all about kicking because there is no way someone can get one of those terrible kisses through his boots, and gets the closest infected near them thrown on their back.

Alix is helping people onto the roof- he decides to not question on how she knows how to get to the roof- and that should work. These infected don’t have that much dexterity or much high thought processes.

“Nino! Let’s-”

Adrien gets tackled, and he very quickly breaks the hold by slamming his elbow into the person’s shoulder, terrible mistake by not pinning his arms, and rolls back onto his feet and then just keeps running. Definitely not thinking about how he might have definitely just dislocated Nino’s shoulder from the feel of that hit.

“Pollen,” He hisses, “Go see if Nino’s infected or not!”

She zips off, Adrien’s conflicted if he wants Nino sane and therefore felt that but can transform or like these drugged out infected so then he doesn’t have to think about what he did.

The infected block out his path that Alix and the rest we’re using- it seriously sucks that the akuma gets to have that blast kiss effect- so Adrien improvises. He can’t transform yet, he can’t tell where the akuma is or if there’s still some noninfected out there that could catch a glimpse.

But he can abuse the ring slightly- surely no one will notice as his hand gives away to black now- and jumps off someone’s head to get to the top of the door frame. Leaping up on his toes and kicking off the wall to reach the roof, very specifically with his left. Since he can barely even use his right to help hoist himself up as everything under his right starts to crumple apart.

It doesn’t help that he gets slightly distracted with Pollen coming back, and she doesn’t even need to say anything when she just looks relieved. Small miracles. Adrien definitely wanted this outcome.

And he will apologize for the dislocated shoulder later.

He swings, getting his entire right forearm up. And along with Plagg’s efforts too they manage to not cause the roof to fall apart before he can hoist himself up on the tiles. Desperately trying not to slip as he crawls away from the infect swarming the hallways and basically just about everywhere given the sudden screaming happening on the streets as well.

The opinion of the heroes is sure to go up after the incredibly disruptive akuma.

Hawk Moth probably knows that. That’s probably why he did this one.

“Oh, Shelly’s here,” Plagg grumbles and sighs, “Finally.”

“Hey there,” Carapace gives him a tense smile and a hand and how wonderful is that. “Need a lift?”

Adrien’s face practically splits as his shoulders slump- it’s so wonderfully Nino- and grabs the hand. “I’d love one. Thank you.”

It’s a bit of an awkward grab, only possible due to the massive strength of Carapace, but Nino pretty much just pulls him forward enough to get that arm around his waist and can pick him up just from that before jumping to the flat part of the roof. Where, thankfully, Rena is there with the rest class as well.

Adrien frowns when he notices that Alya, Sabrina, Ivan, and Mylene didn’t make it. Ladybug’s also noticeably absent. Though it’s entirely possible that she’s handling some other part of the city. Or the akuma. Adrien didn’t keep track of them.

“Adrikins!” Chloe almost immediately appears by his side. “You’re alright!”

“Yeah,” Adrien shoots a grin to Carapace, “I did have some help. Thank you.”

Nino snorts, “You already managed to parkour up to the roof, you would’ve been fine Mr. Ninja.”

“Still very appreciated.”

“We’ve got other problems,” Rena’s frowning down at her flute, “Ladybug’s offline, so’s Chat.”

“What?” Nino pulls off a plate from his shield, tapping at it like a tablet. “Ah shit.”

Lila gasps, covering her mouth. “Oh no, the two original heroes! Does this mean-”

“No,” Adrien somehow refrains from snapping, since Lila could be sincere here. “They’ve likely only been taken as civilians. Which is stupid from Hawk Moth. How can he possibly figure out who they are now? These infected are like…”

“Zombies?” Kim throws out.

“I was going to say high, actually. Zombies is better though.”

“High?” Rose parrots, “Isn’t the akuma from Miss Bustier?”

Alix and Nathenial chuckle, a little high strung, and she mutters a comment about hippies that Kim hears too and keeps the hysterics going a little further over there.

Oh well, better than panic.

“Kit,” Plagg moans next to him, “Either get a handle or put on those gloves.”

Plagg sighs when he does, Gigga flying up and patting him. “We need a better solution than this. I do not know where this goes but I can’t conceive it has a happy end. It’s only getting worse.”

“Later Gigga,” Pollen says, eyes peeled along the sides of the roof. Wisely keeping watch. “For now we need to keep these infected away.”

“Maybe we can handle it,” Max pulls out his phone, “We’ve never had an akuma last more than an hour or so and maybe it’ll just fizzle out. Especially once she gets her goal of taking all of Paris.”

“Might not be her goal though,” Nino holds up his plate, showing a news service that the akuma shows up at. 

They all kinda huddle around those with screens- Adrien’s phone is definitely in his bag and he snaps off the bracelet and throws into the school and decides it’s not his problem anymore- and Adrien definitely takes the opportunity to press closer to Nino. Chloe doesn’t try to go around or the other side, pressing closer to him, and he wraps an arm around her.

He hopes she didn’t have to see Sabrina get infected.

Something tells him she did though.

“News is always telling us about the hate in the world,” The akuma, oddly and almost disturbingly, hugs the now pink eyed dopey reporter. “Now go out and spread the love. We are the city of love after all! And soon, even Chloe Bourgeois and Adrien Agreste will know this love!”

He cringes along with Chloe and leans in to mutter towards her. “Note to self, send Hawk Moth a strongly worded gift on proper etiquette about showing appreciation.”

She nods, shaking slightly and he squeezes her tighter.

The akuma, they call themselves Zombizou which wow, then goes on about getting the miraculous. Which, sure, it’s only the turtle and fox active, but it feels like they can barely get through even with Carapace and Rena Rouge now. Adrien thinks that him and Ladybug might be able to handle it if this goes sideways. But then Hawk Moth gets more miraculous that will be disastrous.

“I say,” Alix throws a glare over at Chloe, “As an offering, we give her half of what she wants and throw Chloe to the mob.”

Adrien takes a half-step in front of her, even more pissed at how Lila’s filming. “We aren’t giving up anyone.”

“She started this whole mess!”

“If we’re going on that logic let’s also go get her parents and grandparents and maybe even throw in Miss Bustier’s parents. Just to spice it up.” Adrien scowls, hands flexing into claws. “I’m sure they definitely also knew how this would all blow up it our faces!”

Alix glares back, though he does notices some looks exchanging with Nathenial and Juleka and Rose. But he doesn’t care. If she takes one step in trying to take Chloe-

His bones crackle, energy flooding through him, and he looks away sharply with a huff.

His stomach pangs with the surge, and it thankfully settles as he does.

“My King, getting emotional will not help.” Pollen mimes breathing that he tries to follow through with, focusing on her rather than the general mutterings against Chloe and panic of what do they even do because Ladybug and Chat Noir aren’t here.

Adrien inhales. No, he is here. Ladybug isn’t, but he is and he’s a superhero.

He might have hurt Fu. He might have betrayed Nino. He might be failing the team after refusing to talk to them.

But he’s not giving up. He’s never giving up on anyone. This city. He’s going to fight. He refuses to be caged by this anger and fear or anything else!

Plagg rubs his little arms together. “Game face, let’s do this Kit.”

“Let’s lay a trap.”

Adrien interrupts basically everyone on whatever they were talking about, glancing at Pollen to see if she has any notes or comments about the idea. She gives a nod back, and alright. That’s what they’re going with.

“We have all four people, Hawk Moth is going to want Carapace and Rena and Zombizou wants me and Chloe. If they’re both faced on the same target they’ll be more predictable and-” Adrien sighs and rubs at his itchy eyes from those stupid contacts- “Lila, why are you filming?”

“Oh, I’m going to give this to Alya for the LadyBlog!” Lila hums, “Actually can we give a recap about Ladybug and Chat Noir’s situation too?”

Damn, he hates being recorded like this but Alya will love the coverage.

Carapace and Rena glance at each other-

Adrien sighs again, “Ladybug and Chat Noir are offline, likely hit as civilians and won’t be able to transform until the effects from the akuma are gone.”

Juleka mutters something.

“Oh!” Rose exclaims, “That’s right! Chat Noir hasn’t been involved in the last couple akumas-”

“He’s been there though!” Nino crosses his arms, “Chat Noir would never just abandon anyone-”

“But he’s been hanging back so that me and Carapace here get some more involved practice with akumas.” Rena finishes, smoothly. Very clearly a lie but he appreciates it and wishes he could give them both a great big hug.

After this weekend, after what Ladybug or their kwamis might have said, he didn’t know what to expect from them.

“Anyway!” Adrien clears his throat. “If we’re setting a trap we need to be able to control the amount of these infected can be around. Somewhere that will require Zombizou to show up.”

“Those guys can’t swim. Something like that?” Kim suggests.

“Maybe,” Alix snorts, “If you want them to all drown.”

Rose squeals, leaning into Juleka. Who rubs her arm. Which, sorry Rose, but they have to talk through this.

“The tip of the Eiffel Tower would work,” Max states. “It has the necessary qualities of limited access as well as a limited platform at the top. With Carapace’s shielding abilities, we could make the only access point the outside that only akumas and the heroes have proven to climb.”

Nathenial scoffs, throws his arms out. “Oh, just a trip to the tower then? Great. It’s not like there’s swarms of people who want to slobber all over us!”

“Rena,” Adrien turns towards her. “You’ll be in charge of that. We’ll need illusions to keep them distraction. Something bright and loud and totally obnoxious.”

“Ah,” Lila giggles, “Kinda like Chat Noir then.”

He glares, along with most of the others which is touching, and Lila raises her non filming hand. “Oh, I meant no offense! It’s just that he’s usually the distraction. It’s like his thing.”

Most of them also sigh and let it go, unfortunately forced to due to the situation and they can’t start arguing right now, but Adrien’s going to pester Alya to do something in favor of Chat Noir with this going into the recording. Just a short article. Something.

“We can take that bus!” Rose points, “We can all fit in that!”

Chloe scoffs quietly behind him as Max frowns over at it. “Does anyone know how to drive a bus? And potentially break into it?”

“I can do that.” Adrien shares a grin with Plagg. “No problem.”

They all stare at him for a moment before Nathenial huffs, “Wow, I am learning so much about you today. First a ninja and now a bus thief?”

“My savate and fencing isn’t exactly a secret. And,” Adrien shrugs, “Father likes me well prepared.”

Alix snorts, “Gotta have a talk with the old man then about why I haven’t been taught to break into cars.”

“Um,” Juleka clears her throat, when only Adrien and Rose hears and turns to her. “Getting down?”

Adrien looks, sees the path he’d take, and knows that only the other superheroes and maybe Kim or Alix could follow him. Not an option.

“My King!” Pollen flies up to him. “The infected are climbing over each other to get up here!”

“Right now!” Adrien blurts, rushing to the side and yep, there they are. “Rena do the illusion on the street and Carapace will just have to carry people.”

One of them actually gets on the roof as the sound of a flute fills the air so Adrien bends down to throw something, feeling nothing and snapping off something metallic before flinging it at their knee. Causing them to slip and slide back down.

“Alright!” Nino jolts, grabbing Nathenial and Rose judging from the squeals. “Let’s go!”

Alix also finds something to grab, chunking it at the infect crawling up. “Man, video games are going to be so boring after this.”

“Can you imagine-” Adrien holds back a wince when he recognizes some of the faces of those he’s hitting- “If Call of Duty releases a DLC or something to have their zombies act like this?”

“Gotta change the names though.” Kim throws a pencil from his pocket, and then pulls at another like he has some stash in there. “Like crawlers don’t make sense.”

Carapace jumps back up, the ground thudding. “Okay! Li-long brown hair girl and girl emo, let’s go.”

“So says you!” Alix retorts back to Kim, “Someone crawling over the floor like some fucking sort of python trying to squeeze and kiss me? Terrifying.”

And yeah, said like that, sounds actually awful.

“Ah!” Chloe squeals, “Adrikins!”

He pivots and headshots- oof, sorry Aurore, instincts- at the other tower that’s coming up. Crawling onto the flat part so leaving those guys to Kim and Alix, Adrien runs over to get in between them and Chloe.

“Blondie and brainiac, you’re up.”

“Mess up my hair and ahhh-!”

Adrien just keeps kicking, wishing he was closer to Alix and Kim again to keep the banter up, but Rena’s still occupied with the illusion and he doesn’t want to disrupt their focus.

“Huling!” Gigga screeches, “Another column!”

That’s just great. At least it’s just Kim and Alix. It’s like, less than a minute. He gets closer to Rena, because he really needs this mirage to be her focus and with the ring helping he can duck and weave and kick for as long as he needs to.

“Alright, Mr. Model-”

“Take Alix and Kim!” Adrien snaps his foot at a knee and then pushes the infect into falling down and taking out others.

“But-”

“Now!”

Carapace huffs, but does so thankfully, and Adrien elbows Rena. “Alright, you gotta go.”

She keeps playing, but her eyes are concerned so Adrien pushes her- it’s fine, she easily manages to jump around and get to the ground- and Adrien jumps along. Sliding on the tile, momentarily longing for his baton, Adrien drops to go feet first. He grabs with his right hand at the edge, the roof groaning and craving in as it absorbs his momentum and fails partial with the ring there, and he uses the rest of it to swing towards the wall. Old stones sticking out and window ledges making it easy to drop and monkey his way down until he’s close enough to just push off and roll.

“Huling!” Gigga smiles bright as he sprints over to the bus, “You are a spider!”

“Hey!” Plagg scowls, “That was clearly the agility of a cat!”

“Gotta go with Plagg,” Adrien mutters as he gets close, “Spider I’d just stick. But thank you Gigga.”

The doors are opening, thankfully only him going through since Rena’s doing a great job at keeping the infected away, but Carapace forces them shut after him and then gives him a look. “You’re going to be the death of me someday, dude.”

Rose squeals, basically melded to Juleka’s side. “How do you even do any of that?”

“Come by my room tonight and I’ll show you my rock wall.” Adrien smirks, at Nino though, as he sits in the driver seat. Key gone, because of course, and he shoves his hands underneath and just wills Plagg to start messing with things.

The engine starts up.

“Holy shit!” Kim yells, “Adrien actually knows how to steal a bus!”

“That was kinda a lie,” Adrien fires back as he’s hit with the very real problem that he’s never actually driven anything. “I, uh, was taught how to hijack a car if I was kidnapped but more pressingly I don’t know how to drive.”

“My god,” Max pushes his way forward, “I’m surrounded by the rich and spoiled.”

Chloe and Alix actually both snort at that, Chloe a lot more standoffish than Alix.

Juleka mutters about living on a boat, which, wait, what? They’re in a city?

The bus lurches- “I swear Kim, I invite you to figure out how this is different from a car if you say anything!”- but they make their way through the city. Adrien very much so doesn’t look out the windows if he can help it. Paris is meant to be bustling and busy always, but there’s no one driving now and the only movement outside is the infected trying to get into cars or chasing them or getting into buildings.

Cheery.

Alix is right. Video games about this is going to hit a little different after this.

Then Adrien’s stomach growls, loudly and painfully, and he immediately turns from where everyone looks. It’s not like he’s actually going to get up to the back just to avoid them, all of them have ended up just huddling around the front, but still, he avoids all their gazes.

“Dude,” Kim says, “Lunch was only an hour ago.”

“Photoshoot.” Not quite a lie. There was one, but he had plenty of time to eat still. “I usually have snacks in my bag, but…” Adrien trails off in a shrug.

“I’m not surprised!” Rose smiles, “After all defending from all those infected, I’m sure your body worked up an appetite!”

Juleka nods, mutters. “It was super cool.”

“Hey,” Nathenial pulls out a slightly mushed granola bar from his jacket. “Have this.”

“Oh no, you don’t have-”

Alix grabs it and throws it at him. “Take it and keep on doing your ninja stuff for us.”

“You should take it, my King, it is important to keep your strength up.”

Plagg nods, which really seals him in and he opens up the wrapper. “And ask if someone has some water. Your right hand is getting into some bad shape.”

Adrien didn’t notice and asks. Thanks adrenaline and high-stress situations. In return, Adrien’s going to break Hawk Moth’s hand later for when the pain sets in.

“Okay,” Lila points the camera at him after he finishes the bar and only starts sipping the water because he can’t just enjoy anything, “Here’s what I’m curious about. So you attacked Zombizou to give us the opportunity to escape, but that was the akuma. How’d you get away?”

“Nino.” Adrien locks his jaw, very specifically doesn’t look at Carapace. “He shouldn’t have done it, for the record and stuff. He would have been with you guys then. I have this training and he doesn’t and he shouldn’t have and now…”

Nino technically isn’t infected. He wasn’t. He’s sitting right there. But if he did? Which could have happened easily, then they’d only have Rena and god, that’s a lot to put on her. Adrien should have done something better, anything. Noticed he was still around.

Chloe snorts, “Might not have done any good. We still lost Sabrina and the others to them.”

“And you’re not letting his sacrifice go in vain,” Rose smiles, “That’s important.”

Adrien smiles back, tries to. He’s upset, at Nino and what could have happened, that Lila brought it up and why she did that, that he wasn’t able to get away and transform so it does kinda feel like it’s in vain when he could be doing so much more as Chat Noir. Alas, Rose doesn’t deserve that from him though.

“You did come up with a pretty great plan under all that stress,” Carapace nods at him, “So, like, never become akumatized or start working for Hawk Moth. Just don’t do that to me man.”

Adrien snorts at that, stamping down the sheer terror that thought causes. “I’ve got a lot to be happy for, so, no sweat. Plus, we need some plan because we have to save all of them.”

“Ooh,” Rena’s smirking at him and leans forward, “Does is the hottest bachelor in Paris got a secret amor around?”

Plagg instantly crackles at that, Pollen stiffing and Gigga asking “Isn’t he right there?”, but Adrien just shrugs and looks away with a smile.

Because yeah, he does have this incredible boyfriend that, for some reason Adrien can’t figure out why, thinks he’s worth saving. That despite all the effort and struggle and never being allowed to see each other, Nino really does like him. Adrien doesn’t deserve it, isn’t worthy of it, but right now, yeah, wow, Nino likes him.

“Oh shit!” Alix’s shout jolts him to standing. “You do!”

“Try not to give me a heart attack too!” Adrien clutches at his chest. “I technically have a medical condition!”

Then he blinks. Since no, he doesn’t, his mouth was just trying to cover his extreme reaction to that. Unless wielding the ring of destruction and poorly handling the bee miraculous counts as a medical condition. Which, it should. But no hospital is going to take that.

“Uh… none of you heard that.” Adrien flashes a bright smile at them. “For the sake of not getting my Father involved and NDAs, I said nothing and you heard nothing. And you all will help me hide Alya’s body if she doesn’t edit this footage.”

“But,” Rose leans in, “Are you alright?”

“What? Pssh, yeah, totally fine. It’s just a rare genetic thing, and it’s not serious.” Adrien briefly wonders if he needs to name something but he doesn’t actually have anything. “It’s why I’m a part of so many fast-twitch type sports rather than endurance. So it’s really not that irrelevant anymore.”

Which is true. Maybe if Lila one day learned the truth, she’d be proud. Vague references and reasons with the real truth sprinkled in there.

“Well, shit, dude,” Kim gives him a nod, “You’re still in killer shape.”

“Uh… thanks?”

“Anyway,” Rena leans in, eyes wide. “I think we’re getting off topic from the fact that the Adrien Agreste is taken.”

Rose suddenly inhales, shares a look with Juleka who gives a slight helpless shrug back, but Adrien just tries to come up with an answer.

He just looks at the camera and then faces forward, face blank. “No comment.”

“Oh, come on, I’m sure this can get edited too-”

Adrien smiles, one that’s meant to appease cameras. “No comment.”

“But-”

“Guys, why’s this even a big deal?” Kim frowns, “Me and Max had a bet on this, like, since October. It’s obviously-”

“Kim,” Chloe snarls, “Finish that sentence and I’ll make you regret it.”

Kim shuts his mouth and throws his hands up, and Adrien gives Chloe a smile. Not how he would have done it, but the effects are appreciated. Especially since Carapace relaxes. Perhaps not obviously, but he doubts Nino had much more of a plan than to just not say anything. He’s an awful liar.

Adrien smiles. Nino’s just so great.

“Alright,” Max calls as the bus lurches ever closer to the Eiffel Tower. “Do we have a plan or what?”

“Uh…” Nino turns his head towards him. “Plan?”

Man, plans aren’t usually his thing. He’s really quite happy to leave it to Ladybug most of the time…

Adrien pushes his shoulders back, “We have to get to the tip. Assuming the elevator works, Rena uses an illusion to get them away and then we all make a mad dash for it. If the elevator doesn’t work, Carapace will put a shield around it and we’ll have to carefully get to the stairs. Once we get to the top, we either advertise our presence or we wait for Zombizou to make their entrance.”

He gets nods from everyone, even though Nathenial is about ready to chew through his cheek and Rose is doing a silent pump up action, but they can do this. Adrien isn’t going to lose anyone else.

“I’m not sure if I can get closer-” The bus is under the tower and close, but- “I’ll start hurting them if I get any closer.”

“Okay!” Kim jerks, pumps his fists and stomps his feet at the door. “Let’s do this!”

“Kim.” Adrien points to the emergency exit on the roof. “We’re going out this way.”

“Oh, uh, right! Smart. Totally knew that.”

Rena bursts out first, the sound of her flute coming after and then Carapace is helping boost everyone else onto the roof before coming up last. Adrien makes a subtle gesture to Pollen and Gigga to go check out the elevator so maybe they can see if it’s obviously broken or not.

Slowly, in their drugged out state, the infected begin to run with their outstretched arms over. Pollen and Gigga come back, both of them basically shrugging at him, so Adrien pleads that this goes right. So when Rena nods- still playing the flute, she’s really gotten good- all of them begin to run towards the elevator that simply has to work.

“Uh,” Alix presses the buttons, frowning, “The buttons aren’t working.”

Adrien hates everything.

“They’re all still distracted.” Nathenial hisses, “Let’s just go through the stairs then.”

They get maybe a quarter of the way to the stairs at the other leg before there’s a very distinct beep in the air and the sound of the flute falters. It starts up again, so they can still inch their way across, and Rena just needs to hold on a little longer until they make it.

“AH SHIT!” Kim yelps, jumping back as infected come out of the staircase. The mirage going still when Rena stops playing to whack them away from with her flute.

Adrien sharply gestures to Pollen and Gigga again, each of them flying to the other staircases to see if they’re better, and he runs towards the front to help deal with the infected coming out.

“Huling! This one is empty!” Gigga yells, the leg closest, thank goodness.

“Next leg everyone!” At his order, most of them instantly start running. Carapace at the front to bash away some of the infect already getting close. Rena playing up the flute again- beep beep beep- after the knocked out bodies in the stairwell keep the others from getting down.

“Ah,” Adrien almost rams into Kim who stumbles down. “Shit Kim, you good?”

“Yeah, I…” He swallows, “My ankle hurts.”

Adrien loops an arm under him and basically hauls him towards the other leg. It slows them down, most of the class are now going in and up. Rena runs in after them as Carapace comes out, throwing his shield at the infected coming close to them and kicking others approaching the doorway.

“Come on, we’re almost-” Adrien stumbles as Kim does and he fights for his balance to drag them forward.

“Kiss… kissy…” Kim shoves into him, wrecking all of his balance, and Adrien goes down. Trying to push despite his legs all tangled up and he can’t- he can’t-

“Kit-!”

“BARRIER!”

And for the first time in too long, Adrien’s body sings. His right arm blooming in a sudden strength and so full of life as his heart dances wildly in his chest and his skin alights with the fresh slide of his clothes and his vision bursts into bright light and crisp detail and he can hear. The whole world dazzling and there and so very real that he just gasps with the sensation.

Also the fact that Kim’s on top of him giving him way too many kisses on his face- that part of this new sensation sucks and Adrien’s scrubbing his face because ulgh- but mostly the rush of life rippling through him.

Which isn’t even all of it. It’s the most sudden, giving him whiplash from the snap of this new reality filtering in, but there’s more.

It’s no sensation. Yet deep and powerful. A curling around him that’s pleading with him to stay. Stay here. Stay the same. Please don’t change. A warmth, desperate perhaps and almost too much, but it’s grabbing onto him and chanting. Don’t touch! Don’t touch him!

And even then that isn’t quite right. That isn’t quite the sum of it. That’s just the protection part. Some logical, objective feeling that is of course tied to this.

But Adrien can feel Nino in it. It’s just Nino. Pleading with him to not go. Desperately trying to hold him and keep out everything else. Trying to be reassuring but way too nervous for that.

I gotta get back to Nino.

It’s effortless to pull on the ring, no pain in his hand or arm, just the strength. Sheer strength and speed that gives him the power to break out of Kim’s grasp and sprint, rolling through infected and doing a jumping kick he was not aware he could do, and he flies past Carapace up the stairs. Nino hot on his heels as they climb up and up. 

“Adrien! Dude!” Alix whips towards him when they get to the second level. “You’re… what the fuck happened to you?”

Adrien stares at her for a moment, only comprehending that most of the infected have been shoved away, and then whirls at Carapace as his face tries to stretch into a smile not physically possible.

Then he launches himself at Nino, wrapping his arms around him and squeezing onto tightly. Laughing at some point, all of it bubbling and bouncing around because, god, he’s still Adrien and he’s just Adrien but Nino cares so much about that and- and maybe now Adrien’s started crying too but he just can’t help it now that Nino’s hugging back. Nino’s hugging back and they’re simply holding each other. Nino who cares about him, Adrien, even though he’s stolen Wayzz and doesn’t tell him things and can’t be there for him as much as he should and always in some situation or other, Nino still cares so deeply and Adrien doesn’t know what to do with it except feel how it blankets over him.

“So…” Lila clears her throat, “What exactly happened? And where’s Kim?”

“Oh,” Adrien pulls back, his voice wet and heavy and he’s still smiling and he can’t turn his head towards Lila. Pulling back was hard enough and he drops his head onto Nino’s shoulder. “He, uh, he must have gotten kissed at the stairway. Almost got me.”

Nino’s lips tighten, muttering, “Not gonna let that ever fucking happen.”

Adrien smiles brighter- feeling how true that is- and-

“Okay,” Rena grabs his jacket and tugs, “We need to-”

Adrien kicks against the ground in a great leap back, all the miraculous on him crackling and buzzing and creeping, Rena’s arm twisting until she lets go and Adrien lands. Pivoting to kick up-

His foot freezes when he sees her face- Rena Rouge, his teammate- and just stares at her as she stares back and at Carapace who’s got his shield out and ready to swing. Also in a similar frozen position.

“Uh…” Adrien swallows and steps back. “I’m sorry?”

“Don’t be.” Rena levels a look at Carapace, “What did you do?”

“I- I don’t know!” Nino throws his hands up. “He was about to be infected and I- I just reacted!”

“You said barrier, if that helps.” Adrien wishes he could say more, explain what he knows as Chat Noir and what must be happening and celebrating with Nino. And he will. He will. He’s going to tell Nino.

Just not in front of his class and with Lila recording.

“And it kept Adrien from getting infected! So, like,” Nino gives a grin to Rena, all sheepish and adorable as he throws in finger guns. “New ability unlocked. Yay?”

Rena huffs, “Adrien practically had an emotional meltdown and then straight up attacked me- along with you- at getting separated so what kinda of an ability is that. Separation anxiety with green shellter eyes?”

“Hey!” Adrien glares at her. “I fully admit that there were a lot of emotions that I almost got infected, sorry Kim, and I might not have handled this well so it’s not entirely his fault. Furthermore-” He stresses as Rena opens her mouth- “We have bigger things to worry about right now. The plan hasn’t changed. Hasn’t Chat Noir done similar things? Just cool off until you can talk to him.”

“And I got this elevator working!” Max calls, “So let’s just get to the top then, yeah? Put an end to this absolutely disgusting akuma.”

“No kidding,” Alix huffs while they file in. “This fucking sucks.”

“But look on the bright side!” Rose holds onto Juleka’s arm, “We’re almost at the end now. We have the plan and now even Carapace has a power that will keep Miss Bustier safe when the akuma is broken!”

Nino perks up and grins over at Rena at that, and Adrien tries not to roll his eyes because Nino is going to be thoroughly exhausted by doing it twice, but yeah. The biggest thing was to get here. Push through the horde Zombizou made. Now it’ll just be them and Zombizou, and Zombizou doesn’t stand a chance.

He grins at Nino beside him, flexing his fingers as the ring snaps with energy and power while all of the kwamis around him thicken in color.

They can’t possibly lose. He won’t let it happen.

He’s not losing Nino.

Notes:

If anyone has any strong opinions about season 5, I am so willing to talk about it in the comments
(Like, they just forced Adrien out of the finale completely?? How dare they take his agency when that’s like his whole character arc? Just ughhhhh)

Chapter 15: Volpina

The next call rings until voicemail again.

Adrien sighs, returns back to his homework. Taps along to the music. Wonders what’s the point of learning about art history. It might be important, but, like, not to him. Not now.

Ten minutes later, Adrien calls again.

Voicemail.

He switches over to the LadyBlog, the video that Lila took is posted, edited only after hours from the attack. He doesn’t like how Lila still has that video, but he never truly lied or admitted anything. If it does get out, PR can handle it. Otherwise, he switches over to admin mode and clears out some of the bot comments or just nasty ones that have add nothing to the site.

Calls again. Voicemail again.

The kwamis are watching a show, or maybe they switched over to play a video game. Plagg can more reliably touch objects, but he still needs help so maybe not. Adrien could ask them for advice, but they’ve been doing so much for him that he doesn’t want to bother them. They should be able to rest too. Yesterday, every day really, has been a lot for them.

Adrien hangs up before he can hear the voicemail message.

What’s happening with Nino? After Zombizou, the whole city went on slowly started back up again. He managed to sneak in a ‘bathroom’ break at the end and Ladybug also showed up and they managed to restore everything. And he was even bracing himself to talk but Nino was exhausted even through the suit after trying to use barrier on Miss Bustier with less success unfortunately and Rena did so many nonstop defined illusions that they couldn’t stay and Ladybug was all frazzled and they all parted once it was done.

The rest of school was cancelled, his bodyguard picked up his stuff from the school. Adrien took as long of a nap as he could, managed to hold his ground that the bracelet is enough of a tracker and Father doesn’t need to implement anything more, and feels like another nap but his nightmares already woke him up from the last one and is now doing homework.

And through it all, Nino and him have only exchanged a handful of texts in the beginning, making sure the other was alright and at home, but that’s it.

Texts after are just there, no response. No calls picked up. Nothing.

Adrien needs to talk with him. He’s done with these secrets. He’s done with this pain and guilt. And maybe it will be worse after saying something but maybe then at least there’s the chance that this will stop hurting so much. At least he won’t have to lie anymore.

Just once, it will be so nice to just be honest.

Adrien calls again, voicemail, switches back to his homework and chips away at it.

“Hey Plagg,” Adrien stands, forcing himself away, “You awake?”

That’s a big fat no. He’s been listening to Pollen and Gigga murmuring in the back, mostly ignorable, but Plagg’s not even watching the show. Totally passed out.

He doesn’t want to wake him up to do the transformation.

Adrien glances at Pollen.

“It is not wise to transform with me, my King, unless you have to.” Pollen gives him a sad smile, “After the last time, there could be an instinctual rejection. And, if you’ll forgive me for being so blunt, you don’t have the willpower at the moment to harness subjugation.”

Adrien flops down on the couch. He doesn’t even have the will to argue.

“I just want to make things right.” He sighs up to the ceiling. He checks his phone again, nothing. “Even if it messes everything up, I just.. I want him to know. And I want to talk to Ladybug. And I-” He sighs, presses his hands to his forehead as if that can get rid of the headache. “I just don’t want to be stuck in thinking the same things over and over again and never able to do anything to get away from them.”

“Why don’t you transform with me then?” Gigga offers. “It should go fairly well, considering how uncertain you are of the future.”

Adrien lets out a humorless chuckle. Gigga’s definitely not wrong. But transforming the first time with Pollen sucked. Though Adrien doubts that he can ever be truly adapt with Pollen, it’s not in his nature. So maybe this will be better. Can’t hurt just to try.

“I guess,” Adrien picks up Plagg, gently scratches his ears as he holds him to his chest. “What’s your phrase.”

“Close my eyes to transform, and the open my eyes to revert back.”

Slightly depressing, but Adrien stands up and takes a deep breath to go through with it anyway.

“Gigga, close my eyes.”

The transformation feels significantly less overwhelming than both Plagg’s and Pollen’s. It’s almost cold, how the power crawls and tangles into his body. It’s a bit creeping, but so calm and peaceful too. Still unnerving though, in a way.

Adrien’s eyesight doesn’t get worse, but it’s certainly flat compared to Plagg and abysmal to Pollen’s. But the air and ground vibrates with life. Looking over himself, Adrien figures that might be coming from the fine hairs all over the suit. But, since it’s mostly dark and similar enough to Chat Noir’s, he won’t bother going through the headache of changing it.

This is just for travel, and without even trying he feels significantly concealed. No wonder he was caught unaware when Plagg was stolen. Even if he wasn’t detransforming with Pollen it would have been hard to see anyone coming.

The needles are… interesting, to say the least. He just needs to figure out how to turn off his location.

Just because he’s decided to talk to people doesn’t mean he wants to do it suddenly. Adrien’s doing it on his terms. Not when Ladybug freaks out about seeing a spider hero suddenly showing up.

Eventually he realizes the needles can act as a scroll, they unroll into a thin, papery type screen, and Adrien hides himself from other miraculous wielders. With that done, he keeps one hand dedicated to holding onto Plagg as Pollen perches on his shoulder, Adrien jumps out his window. He’ll first try to find Nino, and depending on how that goes and if Plagg’s awake, he’ll go to Ladybug.

Gigga’s transformation can’t run or fly, they simply crawl. He skitters from building to building, shadow to shadow. Jumping actually seems wrong and scary, not freeing when he can’t see as well in the dark, but he can feels so much by touching it and he’s staying quiet and out of sight. Adrien doesn’t need to go fast.

Or maybe he did need to.

Adrien sighs and thunks his head against the window to Nino’s room. He’s not there. And Adrien can very clearly sees that he’s passed out.

He shouldn’t be surprised. Pulling a new power out from sheer instincts and desperation takes a massive toll on the body. He’ll should let Nino rest for the meantime. He can wait a little longer.

Pollen doesn’t say anything, but she does nuzzle his chin and Adrien uses his free hand to hug and nuzzle back into her. He’s not alone. He still has Pollen and Plagg and Gigga. He doesn’t know what he’d do without them.

Sighing, Adrien leaves. He’s not talking to Nino tonight, so maybe he’ll be able to message Ladybug and talk to her. Or not. He wanted to do that after Nino. Because he knows after talking to her he’s going to want… okay maybe he doesn’t know, but he can’t imagine that he’s going to want to talk to Nino anytime soon after that. It doesn’t feel like it will turn out good enough for that.

Adrien, without quite realizing it, finds himself perched on a ledge. Looking down on their statue.

They look so strong and untouchable. Immortalized and solid within the metal, unconcerned with any issues like this. That they can’t feel any pain.

He doesn’t remember exactly what he said. He told Paris that they would fight. That they would always fight. That they will defeat Hawk Moth. Eventually he has to make a mistake.

Although Hawk Moth can think the same thing about them too, and they’ve been barely skirting by the mistakes they’ve been making. Too much more of this and maybe they can’t come back of it.

He crawls down into an alley, “Gigga, open my eyes.”

Adrien fishes out some food, it’s almost always in his pockets now for all the kwamis, and gives them some and Pollen her packet of jam. Plagg stays asleep as Adrien places him on his head and, yikes, how much is Plagg doing for him? Plagg’s been constantly exhausted ever since the argument with Ladybug, and he needs to figure out what’s wrong. For Plagg.

Now, walking up to the statue, he’s looking up at Ladybug. Even his statue would have to.

Always looking to her, to her plans and her advice and for her friendship. Always her. She absolutely needs to pull through to do her miraculous ladybug. If he doesn’t participate in the restoration… it’s simply not as devastating. Not as important. He destroys the akuma, she recreates all that was lost.

Maybe it isn’t a coincidence that akumas have been more destructive than creative. Maybe Hawk Moth is trying to push this, this rift, this idea that he’s dangerous and perhaps shouldn’t be trusted. It doesn’t help that they didn’t do an interview.

Even here, he almost broke this place in his anger against the akuma. Ladybug’s always had a better handle of herself, she’s never done that.

“GAH!”

Adrien jumps and flinches back at the sudden yell, heart thumping as he stares at one Marinette flopped on the ground.

“Oh, oh my gosh,” He steps forward, “Are you-”

Marinette shoots upright, and he leans back from the whiplash of that. “Fine! Fine, you know me! Hehe! Just one cluzty mess.”

Adrien frowns slightly, while Marinette usually is a hurricane of energy and ideas that he fundamentally can’t understand, she seems more… frazzled than normal. The lighting isn’t great, but her clothes are mismatched lengths and her hair is somewhat contained but also strangely staticky.

She was like this earlier, before the akuma attack, but surely now she’s had a chance to decompress. Especially since the infected didn’t remember anything, she would have no clue what happened except for Miss Bustier’s akumaization. He knows that a whole group of the class that did make it ended up at a major sleepover at Juleka’s again- apparently the favorite hangout place due to her mom’s attitude and Adrien never did ask what she meant by boat- apparently watching really bad zombie movies and make fun of them. Adrien expected her to be there. She’s friends with, like, everyone.

Adrien’s slightly jealous. He knows he’s on pretty good terms with everyone and he’s pretty sure they’d appreciate or at least tolerate his presence, but Marinette seems to know all of them and they all joke around and smile. Which is fair, she grew up with them. Adrien just wishes he could have done the same.

Still, he’ll do what he can.

“You don’t seem very good.” Adrien does not point out the clothing faults. “Something stressing you out?”

“I…” Marinette flashes through multiple different kind of faces, most of them tense, before slumping and rubbing her arm. “I’ve realized that maybe I’m not really a good person.”

Oh.

Oh shit.

Alya needs to be here. Rose. Mylene. Nino. Literally anyone who’s known Marinette for longer than he has. This is heavy emotional stuff and he doesn’t really know what to say because he’s exhausted trying to figure out his own heavy emotional stuff and Marinette just needs someone more put together right now.

“But… you aren’t?” It comes out a question, which no. No that’s not what- “I just mean that I can’t understand that. Like, you’re always helping everyone.”

Marinette shrugs, “It’s not doing them any good. Or just outright hurting them.”

“I…” Adrien quickly flicks through everyone in the class, who, with the exception of Chloe, don’t seem upset with Marinette. “I’m not entirely sure what you mean, just, like, you’re trying. Always. Most people don’t even bother. So like, I’m sure no one thinks that.”

She huffs, smiles. Or, doesn’t, since just looking at it, lips twisted up and eyes trapped within tense muscles, it can’t be a smile. It’s nothing like a smile.

“You’re wrong. I-” She faces him fully, a similar stance people take against him in fencing or savate. Not quite a brace, not quite a challenge, more of a confrontation. “He was so devastated. He won’t even talk to me anymore and I deserve it. I thought I was helping him only to realize I was hurting him the whole time, that I could have been helping, there was SO many ways I could have helped and I didn’t! I didn’t but he did! Every time! And now it’s all falling apart and I don’t know what to do and I couldn’t even stop Miss Bustier or help anyone-”

“Whoa! Whoa, hey, hey…” Adrien puts his hands up, as if he can physically block or ease the tumbling rant and the tears starting to well up in her eyes. Hands, strangely enough, clutching at her ears. “Take a deep breath. Slowly now. No thinking. Just in… and now out.”

Marinette follows, and they breathe together for a few moments. It doesn’t make Adrien feel better- his emotions aren’t as passionate as much as they are just heavy and exhausting- but at least more centered and logical.

And Marinette doesn’t look like she’s about to cry, so that’s a plus.

“Okay, again, I’m not sure what the issue is, but Marinette…” He almost wishes he could ask Gigga or Pollen for advice, both of them are on his shoulder, but that’d be strange. “I- You aren’t the only person capable of helping others.”

Marinette recoils, frowning sharply-

“Okay, that came out really bad. But, like, uh, what I’m trying to say is that it’s okay to be the one being helped. Or that just because you don’t need help doesn’t mean that you’re now responsible for helping others. Someone else can help. Sometimes… sometimes all you need to do is take care of yourself.”

Oh.

Oh shit.

Now Adrien feels like crying a little bit. When was the last time he just did something for himself? But he has to be… he needs to go to school or else Father will pull him away. He needs to look healthy for the company, the family company that Mother loved so much too. He needs to take care of the kwamis, his friends, and so he can save Paris. He needs to smile because if he’s not smiling people will know something’s wrong and if something’s wrong then-

Adrien inhales, holds it a second or two before releasing. Gigga, since Marinette didn’t magically read his mind about his dissolving mental state, flies out in front to try to mime breathing as he just did. It doesn’t really work, since kwamis don’t breath, but it is something to focus on.

“My King?” Pollen nudges his neck.

He nudges back to comfort her and tries to smile at Marinette blinking uncertain at him. “Sorry, did you say something? I didn’t mean to space I’m just…”

She smiles, it feels more real. “Struggling to take care of yourself?”

“Yeah,” He huffs, his smile grows more twisted and relieved at once. “Something like that.”

“I… I know with what you said and everything I might not be the best person to help you, but you know we’re here for you. The whole class.”

“I know,” Adrien says, lying. Not sure at all. “But I’m really not as kind as you. I’m just… I’m being pretty selfish, actually. I’ve gotten all of these opportunities and have met so many wonderful people this last year that, that now when there’s a chance they could slip away, I’m running from it. Just hanging on and closing my eyes and trying to carry on. I should be grateful, to even have anything, but-”

“Oh no,” Marinette pokes him in the chest. “Let me stop you right there Agreste. Because if I’m allowed to slow down and think about myself first, then so are you. You can have good things in your life and keep them if you want to.”

“But I-”

“No buts!” Marinette nods. “You, Adrien Agreste, deserve to go to school and be an idiot teenager like the rest of us and not be so infuriatingly perfect all the time.”

Adrien cocks his head, smiling wider. “Infuriatingly perfect?”

“Agh! Did I really say that?” Marinette’s hands fly to her mouth, eyes widening. “Adrien, I’m so sorry-”

“Nah,” He laughs and waves it aside, “But if it makes you feel better, then it might be nice to just… loosen up every once and while. Nothing… nothing bad is going to happen just cause I wear unapproved clothes and slouch in class.”

“Yeah, yeah!” Marinette grins, “And I can ask people for help and it’s not like all of Paris is going to fall apart!”

“Yeah!” Adrien throws his arms out, “What’s going to happen? The entirety of Gabriel will lose all its stock value if, god forbid, someone gets a picture of me yawning?”

“Oh no!” Marinette laughs, “Clearly someone yawning absolutely ruins the clothes they’re wearing, you should know better Adrien!”

“Ah, yes, of course, what I am saying? Obviously yawning saturates colors and needs to be avoided at all costs.”

They chuckle together, though Adrien can’t even place what’s funny, eventually sighing in the quiet. It’s not comfortable, not really, when they’re standing in a park in the dark because both of them have heavy emotional issues. But it is peaceful. Both of them slumped together, tired but now they’ve got a plan to get out rather than only clawing and fighting.

“Hey,” He smiles and squeezes her shoulder. “I hope you make things up with this friend. If before all this he cared as much as you do now, I think you’ll get through it.”

She smiles back, “Yeah, and good luck with talking to your father to ease up on you. You deserve all the fun in the world.”

“Thanks Marinette,” He pulls back, starts to step away with a wave. “I’ll see you tomorrow. Maybe even in the morning.”

“Yeah, yeah,” She giggles and waves him off. “Get home safe and sleep well. Good night, Adrien.”

“Good night.”

When he sneaks off and transforms again with Gigga, Nino still asleep when he checks so Adrien goes back to his room. Plagg wakes up, groggy and hungry. Pollen praises him for the tact and emotional control he showed. Gigga snuggles up to him and asks why human emotions seem to be so complicated.

And it’s nice, he realizes as he feeds and talks and prepares himself for bed, having all the kwamis around him. They might not get what’s happening all the time with him and have to be quiet for his own sanity sometimes, but they’re there. They care.

Just a few select beings, who have no opinions or outside influence or anything, who just care about plain Adrien. Not the brand or him being a superhero or the person trying to keep everything perfect.

It’s nice, he decides as he lays down and curls around them all. It’s really nice.

This is what he wants to keep in his life.

 

Nino isn’t at school.

When he asks Miss Bustier about it, she says that he’s been called in sick. Which, as disappointing as that is, it’s not surprising. Nino had a major day yesterday, and he can imagine that Wayzz wants to encourage his holder to take care of himself.

Still, even if Adrien wasn’t planning on confessing to him, Adrien would have loved Nino to be here. Not only because he’s Adrien’s favorite person, but also because he’s selfish and wants to use him as a shield.

He walked into the first class and Lila asked for help with her history before he could even try to talk normally to Nino. Second class they had a lab, he was paired with Lila. Upsetting, more so that Plagg can’t sleep as well with her perfume around and Pollen very much so dislikes her and it’s difficult to keep face around her and Gigga’s in awe of the experiment they’re doing.

“My queen!” Adrien falls in step with Chloe, almost going towards Marinette and Alya for help first but backtracked after what he literally told Marinette yesterday about focusing on herself. “And how was your morning?”

Sabrina giggles a bit as Chloe only raises an eyebrow, “Lasted less time than I thought with the blueberry.”

“Not my week. Just, you got anything to make her back off?”

Sabrina hums, “I’m pretty sure she wants to land a Gabriel modelling contract. From what I know, she has decent enough connections to have a possibility but your approval would seal it.”

“That or a ticket to the Masquerade Ball as your plus one.”

Oh, right. That. It’s been mentioned and Adrien knows it’s a huge event from Father and Chloe much be much more aware as the city is involved in it, but ugh, he’d just give her his ticket if he could. It still months away, but Father will already be working on the designs. Adrien really doesn’t care about it. Much pressing things to think about.

“Well, I’ll let her down then.” Adrien shoots them both a smile, “Thanks for your help, your Majesties.”

Sabrina giggles again, Chloe simply giving off a pleased grin, and Adrien’s in better spirits with this class. Sure, he can’t talk to Nino, but he does text- beg- Nathalie so he can stay for lunch. She says yes with the condition his bodyguard brings him acceptable food, Adrien has to get something for her soon, and boom. Done.

Progress.

Once he gets that food, he’ll just transform and go over to Nino’s. Great plan.

Adrien’s not going to think about what said plan is going towards, but the progress feels good.

Unsurprising but also largely frustrating, Lila comes up next to him as he walks out to grab the lunch.

“Adrien! Are you staying for lunch? I-”

“Lila,” He smiles, talking in a cool voice as to not call attention as they walk through the hallways. “I’m not allowed to give away my plus one ticket to the coming ball, my father will make that decision. Nor do I have any managing power or even connections to the managers that hire our models.”

“Oh,” Lila laughs, the pitch of her voice grating on his ears. “Silly Adrien! I just want to have lunch! I mean, it would be nice for us to get to know each other more.”

She ends that by looping her arm around his, and he slides it out. Lifting his shoulder with Pollen to nuzzle before the irritated buzzing coming from her starts to becoming shouting or an incident with her miraculous happens. Already it vibrates on his head, the inklings of a headache forming.

“Lila, I’m more than happy to talk to you, but my time and my personal space are not yours to hound on. As it stands, I’m very busy right now so while I appreciate your offer, I have to decline.”

“I just want lunch-”

“I need to talk to someone.”

Lila leans in, all smiles, “Talk with me, or I’ll out you.”

“My King!” Pollen explodes, “Please give me the honor to punish her! Sneak my miraculous on her and I will make her suffer-”

“Out me and my Father will ruin your reputation.” Adrien smirks at her, “You’re a fool to think he doesn’t know about it. We’re in the works of an announcement, and if you ruin that, he’ll ruin you.”

A bold face lie, but she can’t possibly know the truth. Or, really, she can’t risk it if it is the truth. She can’t have a bad reputation before starting her career, and if Father says anything negative about her it will all be over.

Adrien doesn’t want it to get that far, Lila’s annoying but he won’t ruin her work career, but if she doesn’t back down then it’s her fault. He warned her what she was walking into.

Lila’s smile doesn’t drop, but she does take a step back. “Alright then, maybe next time then.”

Adrien smiles and nods back to her, sighing when she leaves. It’s a bit nice, walking to the outside of the school, that she’s gone and there’s no teacher to listen to or anything. Just walking.

“I don’t like her,” Gigga states.

“She should be expelled from our presence for all eternity.” Pollen seethes.

“I like Pollen’s,” Plagg throws out, yawning and stretching out on his head. “Means I don’t have to smell her. She’s worse than rotten cheese.”

“All your cheese smells bad,” Adrien mutters back, waving to his bodyguard as he goes down the stairs.

“That’s the smell of beautiful maturity, my young Kit.”

Adrien just snorts and approaches his bodyguard. “Hey, so what’d Nathalie force the chef to whip up?”

He hands Adrien the bag and shrugs before signing. “Greek.”

“Ooh, delicious! Did you get some too?”

He grins and nods, “It was delicious.”

Adrien huffs out a chuckle, “I bet. Well, I’ll see you later!”

The car just pulled away, Adrien hiding the kwamis food in the bag that they’re all devouring, when Ladybug herself swings down next to him. Looking pissed.

“Adrien Agreste.” She starts, already drawing out a crowd. “You’ve made a friend of mine upset.”

“Yeah yeah,” Adrien sighs at the illusion, no heartbeat or smell coming from her, and quickly kicks out to dissipate it. “Like Ladybug would ever do that.”

Plagg groans, “I just wanted to have a nice lunch.”

Adrien shrugs and heads towards the locker room as the alarm goes out from the onlookers. “We obviously can’t have nice things Plagg.”

So he stashes the food in his locker and then slips away to transform. He’s too down with this to feel more than a touch guilty that Lila got akumatized and that there wasn’t a more gentle way to bring about it. But honestly he’s more annoyed. He doesn’t know how extensive the powers Hawk Moth gave away are, considering deception is Trixx’s domain. Although, he supposes as the concept of empathy, Nooroo would be able to replicate such powers to an extent.

Ugh, well, at least when they win Rena might have a few new ideas on how to use her powers.

Adrien stays in the shadows, ears pricked up and alert for any sounds of the akuma moving about. The one nice thing about Hawk Moth never showing himself, even when the villain can get better at making akumas and enhancing their powers, he only ever repeats with Mr. Pigeon. The akumas rely too heavily on their eyes, automatically using the boost to their strength and agility to fight head on. And with him and Ladybug transforming consistently for over half a year now, they have an advantage when it comes to utilizing the other benefits magic gives.

Still, it isn’t perfect when the bustle of the city continues on. With the akuma labelled as a low risk to property damage, most people will just go about their lives. Creating noise interference, so hopefully the akuma will need to move.

He spots Ladybug swinging, and he sighs.

“It is still my opinion that you should wait, my King.” Pollen reassures him. “Do not take offense, but there’s a strong likelihood that you will not carry through with speaking with Nino if that conversation happens second.”

“Can’t take offense to the truth,” He mutters, trying not to think about how much he wants to hear her laugh and joke with him again. She was his friend, they talked nearly all the time with how being a superhero affects them, sharing what no one else can, and now? Now it’s all messed up and a sliver of him just wants to go back to it.

He pushes the heavy thoughts out as she suddenly starts speeding one direction. She must have caught sight of the akuma with how she’s moving. Adrien momentarily considers coming out of the shadows to not lose sight either, but no. Nope. The alert would have told them everything he knows and he just… well, he’ll just hang back until after he talks to Nino and then Ladybug.

Rena is bounding towards Ladybug too, and strange enough, the two stop to talk to each other for a couple of moments. Isn’t Ladybug chasing the akuma? Did she lose it and is asking if Rena saw it?

But the two heroines bound off within moments though, again moving extremely quickly through the city, which, it’s always good to practice his stealthy speed. Besides, since the miraculous book makes no mention of the capabilities of their weapons to act as a communicator, it must be Adrien’s idea of technology that had those abilities manifest like that. Plus, when he asked Plagg if the baton’s abilities were new, the kwami shrugged and said he didn’t feel anything new.

Ergo, he shouldn’t need to use a tracker pin to know someone’s location. He can just mentally will it.

Okay, he can’t do it as precisely as the baton can, but he just sort of intuitively knows what direction Ladybug is even if he loses sight of her, so progress! He’ll get a better hang of it later, he still wants to mess more with the runes and see if he can try to learn anything about other miraculous.

Adrien makes a mental note to spend more time with the runes. Once he understands them better, maybe he can make one with Nooroo. Then maybe every akuma can be dealt as simple as Ladybug summoning some chalk and drawing little doodles. Wouldn’t it be nice?

He wishes he could borrow the other’s miraculous to experiment more. Like, if he put his powers into a rune correlating with Trixx, would the illusion only be able to show destruction? Or into Wayzz and he creates a barrier that destroys what touches it?

Nah, he has Plagg and Pollen and Gigga which is plenty to work with. They can keep him busy for a long time.

Dismissing those thoughts, there’ll be time for that tonight or tomorrow afternoon. Adrien needs to keep tailing the group, he’s kinda surprised that they haven’t texted him about the plan yet that. Especially once he sees that they’re all stopped in front of some old warehouse and chatting with Carapace. Or maybe they think this will be easy enough that he won’t have to step in at all.

Ladybug would know he’s tailing though, and usually at least Carapace or Rena keeps him in the loop.

She points very obviously to the warehouse, so Adrien crawls in through the shadows to lay in wait there. The warehouse has a lot of hidden places, and it’s a good spot for a deception type akuma to try and recoup. Yet they won’t be as safe in the shadows as they might hope to be.

His teammates crash in loudly, and Adrien hovers around them. Wondering what the plan is. The akuma probably needs to see them in order to make the best illusions, considering how long it takes Rena to try to make an illusion if she doesn’t know what she’s casting over, so why give up their location?

“Over here!”

The sudden yell startles him, his focus for the akuma shattering and a kick to his ribs sends him falling out into the open. He’s at least with his teammates, but he gives a look over to Rena to ask what gives when an arm locks around neck- shit, air, shit, he can barely breathe like this- and forces his right arm out.

Adrien can’t even resist it by just trying to rip himself out of their grasp, there’s way too much strength there that should be, and, oh.

The green armor and strength can only mean it’s Carapace holding him back.

“What’s he doing?” Gigga cries, “Stop it! STOP IT! LET HIM GO!”

Gigga keeps yelling, easily working into hysterics, Adrien’s heartbeat and trilling lungs not far behind.

“Easy, my King,” Pollen zips around, antennas quivering. “Carapace is under another’s influence once the rest of the team gets here-“

“Good job guys!” Adrien eyes dart towards the new voice, a fox clad akuma who’s face glows with Hawk Moth’s purple mask. “Have at it LB. I’m pretty sure the akuma is in the ring.” The akuma grins, such a vicious, sick smile at him, and glances up at Carapace. “You got a good hold on her, right?”

 Ladybug is smiling when she swings over, walking towards them as Carapace hums an affirmative. “God, Chat, I know this isn’t the place, but I’ve missed you so much and I swear, we’ll do things differently from now on…”

Gigga screeches, reaching higher pitches. “No! No! Stop hurting! Can’t you see? Can’t you see? Please, please make it stop. Go away! Let us go!”

“Wait- guys!” He struggles as Ladybug comes closer, still speaking and no, no he doesn’t want to hear this… remorse when she isn’t even talking to him. Not when her normal blue eyes gleam with a ring of orange. “I’m Chat Noir! Not the akuma! You got it backwards!”

Rena grins too, talking over him and clearly relaxed. “And now the whole’s gang back together. Hawk Moth isn’t going to know what hit him.”

Adrien glares at her, rasps out through a closing throat. “I’m going to destroy you.”

“That’s far too kind!” Pollen seethes, “They are unworthy to have control of their own lives! After this transgression, we would be in the right to take control! For our safety and everyone else’s!”

The akuma practically skips to him, gleefully taking his arm and holding it out towards Ladybug. “No, because that’d hurt your friends. They only see and hear what I want them to, so while I can’t stop you if you wanted to call your cataclysm, Ladybug won’t be aware of it. She’ll still try and grab it, and oh, I’ve always been curious what a cataclysm can do to a person.”

He thrashes in Nino’s grip, which tightens to the point where only a little trickle of air comes in. Not that it matters in a moment, Rena grabbing hold of the arm and forcing it away from trying to mess with Carapace anymore. Thrashing and curling up his hand to just stall for a moment of more time to figure out how to get out of this.

“My King!” Pollen swarms the area as Ladybug reaches for his fist, prying the fingers back. “Adrien!”

“No! No! She can’t!” Gigga sobs, “Not again, not again, not again, I can’t- I don’t know what to do- I can’t do- no, no…”

“I’m so sorry,” He wheezes as he stares at Ladybug, reaching into the ring’s power. Tries to think how nice it usually is to be in Nino’s arms. “I-”

He can’t breathe. Not really. Can’t say how much he wishes it wasn’t like this, how he wishes there were other avenues. Maybe if things just went a little differently, they would have always been friends. Never had an argument like this. That they’d be a unified force, always, never fighting like this. Never hurting one another.

The ring crackles, pure energy and lightning going up his arm. His bones creak, his skull threatening to crack as he holds the power near his heart. Feeling how it thunders.

Ladybug then manages to pry his finger up.

Adrien closes his eyes.

Cataclysm!

Nino and Ladybug cries out instantly as his miraculous trills. It wasn’t a complete break, Adrien can’t do that, not to neither of them, but he messed up their transformations and that’s enough. He can breathe and with one quick inhale he’s flinging his feet towards the Rena, breaking her grip and swinging his fist at the akuma.

He needs to get away. Once he can get away, plan, figure out how to break their illusions. He needs to get away. Destransform, apparently, as the ring flashes and his body abuzz with adrenaline that can’t possibly last.

His hit doesn’t land, Ladybug’s recovers faster than expected and he’s a little woozy, but just barely. So he uses his momentum to plant a foot and swing his other into a kick and-

And drops to the ground at the sound of Carapace’s shifting and shuffling, barely missing the shield and quickly rolling from Rena’s pounce. He can’t engage, he can’t win this fight, if can just leave it’ll be okay.

“Lunge right!” Pollen yells, only instants away from Ladybug’s yoyo.

Adrien sees the floor, sees how to get them to tumble, and calls his power to do so. The ring flashes as he thrusts a hand down and then whole building starts to quake with it. Walls splitting and dust rising as the floor shatters. Black lightning snapping all throughout the building with no control.

Shit.

Adrien scrambles, ignoring how his arm aches all the way up to his shoulder and back, and shouts when a chuck of the ceiling lands on his tail. That hurt- it even hurts fuzzily at the tail- and with a thought the chunk vanishes and the whole building sways side to side.

He really needs to get out of here. His senses ring, slightly out of touch and weirdly delayed, and he needs to get out.

Then he crashes against a hard surface. Completely face-planting, and he staggers back from it. A lot more woozy-

“Huling!” Gigga’s slurring, weird. “They’re about to-”

“Adrien! Move!”

And he tries, really, forcing his limbs as he hears the running from his teammates. He dodges, scrambles, but there’s… there’s all four of them against him and he’s trying to pull the destruction away from them and the building’s shuddering and breaking all around them.

“Try and make a dust cloud!” Pollen shouts. “You can transform with me and use alleviate on them!”

“Oh…’ay…” He wheezes out, fumbling with the ring’s power as he thinks about transforming with Pollen and dodging and-

“The akuma’s about to take down the building.” The real akuma shouts. “Grab his hand!”

Ladybug’s yoyo wraps around his wrist, Carapace crouching into a tackle position, and no, no he needs to get out.

Adrien yanks blindly, feet slipping from underneath him with the abrupt strength from his transformation, crashes down and his skull slams down into the floor-

His sight goes funky, disorientation fumbling all throughout him as the ring crackles, and he releases it out. The whole building groaning and shuttering down as various shouts pick up.

He can’t see. Confused and doesn’t know where to attack. He can feel his powers crackling everywhere inside him with no control, no direction.

Which is exactly what he needs from everyone else.  

“Claws in!” Adrien coughs, wheezes in the dust. “Close my eyes!”

He can’t see really at all, but- “STUPEFY!”

Everything seems to explode and quickly switches back into Chat Noir- there’s a reddish and gold hue around his chest- a few moments before Adrien’s breakfast makes a very determined effort to try and jump out of him.

It’s partially successful.

Mostly because he’s flinging himself at the dazed akuma without care about that, the purple mask appearing, and he smashes into them. Ripping the object off and it dissolves in his hands.

So does the butterfly, and he can feel the created illusions, the effects, and he destroys all of that to.

“The hell?” Nino groans.

“What happened? Rena echoes.

Adrien glances back at them, thoroughly beat up and needing Ladybug to get better now so he can leave, and it only takes a moment before recognition dawns on their faces. Not surprising stupefy didn’t last long, he’s definitely not an adapt user of Gigga’s miraculous.

Nino glares at the ground, muttering furious insults. “Oh, you goddamn akuma- I swear on all that is holy when I get my hands on Hawk Moth…”

“Chat!” Ladybug yells. “Oh god, are you-”

“Stay away from him!” Pollen shouts, voice booming. Miraculous quivering on his head. “Make sure she stays away!”

Adrien listens. Takes a few quick steps back from her. It’s easy to do that, listening when his head is pulsing and he isn’t entirely sure what he should be doing. It’s easy to follow that instinct, getting away from Ladybug.

Ladybug pauses at that, takes a deep breath, and steps back too. “We need to do a restoration before the building collapses.”

Pollen glances at him, antenna trembling. “I detest it, but she speaks the truth, my King. A restoration is necessary.”

He nods, approaches her, and extends a hand.

“Miraculous restoration.”

He snaps his hand as fast as possible, spinning the ring that’s still firmly on his finger, and sighs as his body as her powers recreate his damaged body.

“Oh!” Lila worries her hands beside them, “I’m so deeply sorry. I was- I was akumatized-”

“Yes.” Adrien sighs, “You were. And I’m sorry you had to handle that. Rena Rouge here will escort you outside. The police will contact you soon regarding a statement.”

“Alright, and can I just say-”

“No.” Nino butts in, rather harshly, and elbows Rena. “Just get home.”

Rena gives Carapace a look but steps forward with a smile at Lila. “Don’t worry. You’re in safe hands.”

Then they’re gone, hurried away, and Adrien slumps against the wall before he can give in to the urge to topple over. “Wow, never been so glad not to talk to the victim before.”

Ladybug’s face flattens, “Chat…”

“Back up,” Carapace frowns, then winces suddenly. Clutching his head, still trying to groan out words. “You… you need help. Like, shit… ugh, man, I- You-”

Adrien smiles at him, gently squeezing his arm. “Go home, Carapace. You need rest.”

“But… you-” He winces again, violently, fingers tightening around his hood.

“You need to rest after these past few akumas. I’ll be fine.”

That’s not true, the second part at least. Adrien knows he’s going to be useless for the rest of the day, thinking about this. Thinking how he now he needs to over to Nino’s tonight because there isn’t long left in lunch.

Nino hesitates, lips tightening, but he with another wince he does leave. Adrien also gives a look at Pollen and Gigga, hoping to tell them how they shouldn’t be here for this conversation either. Gigga must still have a good gut instinct, since they gently pat Pollen’s shoulders and guide her away. Gigga trembling faintly and Pollen glaring daggers at Ladybug all the while.

Adrien takes a deep breath as he turns to Ladybug-

“No, no, you don’t- don’t say anything!” Ladybug blurts, hands flying up. “You’ve done enough. Not in like a bad way! But I need to explain myself and you- you’ve done so much. I just- I’ll tell you what happened, and… and then you can sit on it and then tell me what you want to say, okay?”

Nodding, Adrien walks backwards into a wall and slides down it. God, it feels nice to sit.

“Okay, okay okay.” Ladybug rocks back at forth on her heels, squeezing her eyes shut. “I met Mas- uh, Fu. I met Fu. Tikki led me to him after…” She swallows, “A couple days after collecting the miraculous from Rena Rouge.”

Ah, and here Adrien thought he’s gotten used to this feeling. He’s- god, his chest is literally aching, cracking open, since, it- that was in October. That was four months ago. An entire two thirds of their… well, Adrien isn’t really sure if he can call it a partnership right now.

“I- I swear Chat, if I thought he was actually going to take-” She shakes her head. “Beginning. So, uh, he explains how he’s this last remanent of this organization and, uh, well, he just knew so much. It was such a relief. All the questions and the fears. Everything, he had an answer for it but-”

Ladybug looks away. Pushes a harsh breath out as Adrien tries to hang on to his breath. Tries not to let his lungs collapse because he was going through the same thing, wanting answers, and she told him no-

“He said I couldn’t tell you about it.” She shrugs, arms wrapping around herself. “Nicer than that, obviously. Saying that the ring of destruction was wild, temperamental. That too much exposure or knowledge would only open you up to it and then you would… die. That was always what he implied, anyway.”

“So that’s why you never wanted me to learn.” He mutters, “Or even try to follow that book lead.”

Ladybug cringes.

He glares. “Wait-”

“I-might-have-borrowed-it-from-this-one-girl-who-had-it-with-that-whole-akuma-and-then-Fu-took-a-digital-copy-of-it.” Ladybug rushes. “And, god, the stories he had of the miraculous getting used wrong. The chaos and panic and upheaval they would cause unchecked. I just- anything more than necessary seemed like it could end the world and-”

“That’s not an excuse,” He murmurs it into the ground. Knowing he needs to say it but can’t look at her face at the same time. “Neither of you could make the call on what’s necessary. Especially when I was the one who was taking the hits when what we had wasn’t enough.”

“I- I see that, now. But I- and Tikki was cautious too because apparently Plagg’s never had such an… effective person and I just- it seemed like the safe thing to do.” Ladybug’s looking at him when he glances up, her eyes wide and teary and he looks away. “I- please Chat, I really just wanted you safe. That’s why I-”

Adrien gets up. This conversation isn’t over, but he doesn’t want to be here anymore. He doesn’t want to hear this anymore, learn more of what she’s done, what she decided for him, he can barely think about what she has said and it’s clashing what happened last week- giving him Pollen, their fight- and he just can’t take all of it.

“I have to go.”

“Chat-”

“LB… don’t.” He drags a hand down his face, scratching at some tears trying to get out from the mask. “Just don’t.”

“But we need to- Tikki is so devas- she says we’ve been thrown out of balance, we need to fix it before-”

“I don’t need fixing!” He blurts out, shouting and exhausted and so done with this. “Okay?! I don’t need fixing or to be kept safe or locked away or anything! Now, I’m going to go and I-” He sighs and starts walking away- “I’ll see you for the next akuma or tomorrow’s patrol.”

Not tonight’s. Just not tonight’s.

“Alright then…” Her voice drifts as he goes through the hallways out of this place. “See you.”

And then he leaves, running out, running through the streets, back into the school, avoiding everyone and only through sheer imminent starvation his stomach is broadcasting gets him to stop and grab his lunch.

Not that he eats much of it, as he thoughtlessly dissolves in the boiler room. Away from everyone and everything. Sobbing and leaning into the three kwamis around him in peace.

He’s not even sure what exactly is causing this pain when it isn’t exactly new, only that it is. It is here and he hates it. He hates this feeling and all of it and everything to do about it so, so much.

Tonight. Adrien makes the vow to himself. Some way or another, he is hunting down Nino and talking to him. He can’t do this any longer. Not on his own.

Chapter 16: Maledikator

Nino wasn’t flat out ignoring him that night, sporadic text messages coming in, but no calls.  

So now Adrien’s knocking on the Lahiffe’s apartment door. Terrified and tense, exhausted and distracted, thoroughly torn up on whether this is a good idea or not.  

But the idea of waiting any longer, of drawing this out any further, gets him to knock again.  

There’s a muffled- “Noel! Get the door!”- and a couple of seconds after whining and groaning the door opens up to Nino’s little brother.   

“Adrien!” Noel perks up and tugs at his arm. “You wanna play Super-”  

“Ah,” Adrien has a negative ability to say no the child, which he suspects that Noel is aware of, and interrupts him. “I’m actually here to see Nino about something.”  

Madam Lahiffe glances up at him from where she’s cooking. “He’s just in his room. Are you staying for dinner? It’ll be ready in about 30 minutes.”   

“I’ll join, but I already did eat.”   

“Well, a growing boy like you could always stand for more. And I always make extras.” Madam Lahiffe grins and rolls her eyes. “Especially now that Nino can’t seem to get full. I don’t know how he stays skinny.”   

Adrien grins, spins his ring. “It’s a mystery, and thank you!”  

He slips into Nino’s room without issue. Knocking, since the door is locked, but Gigga dips inside and comes out shaking their head. So, very gently, Adrien wills Pollen to interact with the lock. It’s a lot more difficult than with Plagg, but he refuses to break the lock.   

It’s a little weird, being in Nino’s room without Nino, but Adrien just sits on his couch and then… waits. He didn’t bring any of his stuff to do, and Adrien isn’t going to use any of Nino’s things when he doesn’t have permission. But, still, it shouldn’t be long until the patrol is over and Nino will be back.   

He’ll just wait.  

“Okay,” He mutters, flopping down on his side and glancing down at Plagg who’s curling up on his chest. “Nino’s been acting weird since yesterday, since Miss Bustier’s akumatization. That’s probably a superhero thing, right?”  

Plagg cracks an eye at him, “Kit, you know that’s the case.”   

“Yeah, I know, I know. Just, just double checking.”   

“Fear not, my King!” Pollen flies up and pats his forehead. “Nino has been a steadfast sentinel. This will go well.”   

Adrien arches an eyebrow at her, “I was under the impression you weren’t enthused about Nino.”   

“He’s much too confused to be effective at his job most of the time, but that is being mended now! His loyalty and determination will now have purpose rather than simply floundering around.”   

Ah, yeah, that confusion is most definitely his fault. Everything about Chat Noir and superheroes hasn’t really been explained and that’s must be really stressing him out so he gets it. It’s understandable.   

“It will be good.” Gigga states. Which Gigga being confident on something like this is usually basically a certainty. “Staying secret and unknown is not good for a human. Especially for a huling such as yourself.”   

Adrien yawns as he sticks out a hand for Gigga to crawl onto. “What’s that even mean? Huling?”  

“A developing human.” Gigga pokes and entertains themselves by making his fingers twitch. “Like a spiderling, but you aren’t a spider so huling.”   

“Wouldn’t it be humanling?”  

“I thought that the ‘man’ part was another part. So you go from huling to human. And your females go from woling to woman.”  

“Uh… I guess,” That’s not right, in a language sense, but also not conceptionally wrong from the whole childhood to adulthood thing.  

Adrien blinks as his thoughts swirl slower, takes a deep breath and lets himself feel Plagg’s quiet breathes and Gigga’s poking and Pollen’s buzzing around. Then he yawns. But, but no, he can’t be tired right now. He needs to talk with Nino, who’ll be back soon. Adrien needs to talk to him. Yet he’s getting really tired and he needs to… he wants to sleep.   

Sleeping sounds awful though, so Adrien rehearses what he wants to say again. He doesn’t want to freak Nino out anymore. Nor does he want to get flustered and make everything more confusing. Hopefully Wayzz can help him out a little bit.   

Blinking at the slide of the window opening, immensely relieved since, yes, Nino’s back and Adrien can now just talk to him. No akumas or school or anything else. Just them.   

“Wayzz, shell off.” Nino says as Adrien shoos Plagg off his chest and sits up. “Hey- AGHHGA!”   

Nino jumps almost three feet in the air, hands rolling and twitching in what might have been a defensive move, and then just goes stock still staring at him.   

Hmm, yeah, he probably should have established his presence earlier.   

“Uh… hey, Nino!” Adrien smiles, giving his most charming and easygoing grin he can. “I tried to text you earlier, obviously you didn’t get that, duh, but um, hi! Your mom says that dinner will be ready in about 10 minutes from now.”   

“I- uh- I mean, uh…”  

Adrien goes back to what he rehearsed, adapts it to this which he really should have expected.  

“So, I know you’re Carapace.” Adrien starts, “Which, uhm, I first want to say-”  

“I am so sorry!” Nino blurts, “I just- with the whole zombie thing and everything-”  

“Wait, the zombie thing?”  

“Barrier!” Nino glances to his side, body coiled up and hands twitching at his sides. “I, uh, I didn’t really know what it was but Wa- um, so, like, apparently there are calmer versions of it, but, dude, I wouldn’t have just- overwhelmed you like that if I knew or maybe- doesn't matter, I guess, and I shoulda said something but I could barely wake up after that but that’s no excuse what I did-”  

“Whoa, okay.” Adrien mentally pauses the conversation, deciding that this really needs to go first. “You saved me. You don’t need to apologize for that. Please do that, every time. Full permission here on out.”   

“But- but afterwards, what I did- it wasn’t just protection it was deeper than that I didn’t know about it I just used it on you and you’re-” Nino suddenly winces, hands reaching up to massage his forehead.  

“Nino, Nino,” Adrien smiles, grabs his shoulders and rubs circles since wow, he is tense. Must be from all the stress. “Thank you. For doing that. All of it. For wanting to protect me that much, thank you.”   

“I- but it was too much-”  

“It will never be too much-”  

“We almost attacked Rena!”  

“Okay maybe it was a little bit overwhelming but not in a bad way, not in a way where we actually attacked Rena Rouge. She just startled two people who, especially given the circumstances, where a little trigger-happy.” Adrien pulls him into a hug. “I’m sure she doesn’t blame you. I for sure don’t blame you, I’m grateful for you. Always.”  

Nino nods at his shoulder, slumps a little into the hug. “Yeah?”  

“Yep,” Adrien pops the ‘p’, trying to relish in the hug for as long as possible. God, wow, have hugs always felt so tight and reassuring and amazing? “So if this is you trying to convince me to be mad at you for being a superhero and saving me, I should tell you now it’s pretty much impossible and you should just accept my heartfelt gratitude and praise.”   

Nino huffs, “Stop making my emotions sound silly. God, it- I mean you have the whole touching thing- which is totally cool and everything, but, like, I didn’t want to cross any lines.”   

“As long as you apologize for it, I’ll always forgive you.” Adrien tilts his head into Nino’s, sighing. He needs to start up with what he wants to say again. And tragically he shouldn’t do that while hugging Nino.   

He blinks when Wayzz flies up in front of him, faint, but the turtle kwami is very strongly shaking his head. Which, what-?  

“Aw… you can’t-” Nino presses his head down and then pulls back, Adrien rapidly schooling his face. “Okay, but like, me doing that revealed I was Carapace! Like-” Nino squints at him. “Wait a minute, you knew.”  

“Well, I mean-”  

“What gave it away? I was so careful! And there’s this glamor-”  

“You were looking off in space at something.”  

“Damnit, did Chloe tell you about the kwamis?”  

“I mean- she doesn’t love talking about it and-” Adrien takes a breath, this is getting away from them and Nino still looks freaked. So he’s going to keep the conversation paused until they can calm down a little bit and then continue.   

“How about we just, sit down? Talk about it slowly?” No more of this interrupting type jagged conversation. They aren’t going to get anywhere with that and Adrien doesn’t just want to blurt out he’s Chat Noir.   

“Yeah, yeah, okay, sitting.” Nino sits, loose but somehow stiff all at once too. “You know I’m Carapace. Heh, well, guess you don’t have to worry about me falling off anymore buildings. Heh.”  

Adrien puts a knee on the couch to fully stare at him, “Okay, first of all, no one. Ever. Should be falling off buildings. And you heard Chloe, she’s hounded about knowing this stuff. And she’s the mayor daughter, if you- Nino, I can try and help if something like that happens because of course if you’re about to die then transform, but it has to be a last resort if anyone can see you.”  

“Yeah, no, yeah, that-” Nino’s hands do a weird fluttering thing again- “Really bad joke. I just- like, wanted to be a little reassuring. That, you know, that can’t hurt me. And, well, I suppose I didn’t actually get taken by the zombies.”  

“Which,” Adrien huffs and sheepishly smiles- “I should apologize for hitting you like that. That had to hurt.”   

“It did and dude. DUDE.” Nino smiles at him, a full on wide smile as he pushes his hands through his hair. “I can finally tell you how fucking cool you were! When did you learn how to be a ninja? I have a ninja boyfriend!”   

Adrien scoffs, “I’m not a ninja.”  

“You hauled yourself up onto the roof by doing this impossible jumping thing and then jumped off the roof! Like, just scaled down it! And then you hotwired a car! Adrien, dude, my man, you are the coolest person I know. Full ninja.”   

“I do look good in black.” Adrien blinks, since yes, okay, resuming conversation ignoring how Wayzz is still shaking his head behind Nino. “Actually, so I needed to tell you-”  

“BOYS!” Madam Lahiffe calls from the kitchen, with the worst timing. “Dinner!”   

Plagg crackles on his head. “All the luck of a black cat, I’m so proud of you Kit.”   

Adrien huffs, exaggerated enough for him to feel, and shrugs over at Nino. “I guess this’ll have to pause. Though I bet you would be the coolest big brother ever if Noel knew.”  

“And then all of Paris would know.” Nino rolls his eyes. “Kid can’t shut up about whatever new superhero he likes best on tv.”  

“Well yeah,” Adrien elbows him as they stand, “But don’t worry too much, you’re already the coolest boyfriend.”  

Nino looks away, huffing and grinning. “I thought we just established that you’re the ninja, dude.”  

“And, as a ninja, we uphold a strict code of honor and honesty so… clearly I’m right.”   

Nino chuckles softly, leans in softly with a smile, and Adrien relaxes into it. He will say the Chat Noir thing, after dinner, and then he can just have this. The entire time. In and out of the suit, especially in the suit with all of Paris before them. Where there’s no school or schedules or anything. Just pure freedom.   

As it should be. As it was.  

 

“Sorry about that man,” Nino chuckles when they finally, finally , finish with the game night. “If I had realized you were coming over I would’ve warned you.”   

“It was fun.” Adrien says, absolutely flopping back on the couch and then immediately has to struggle not to fall asleep. Today has just been... forever, basically. “Just… oof.”   

He didn’t have his nap today. Akuma to back to school to finally going back to fencing to homework to telling Nathalie he was sneaking off to Nino’s don’t tell Father and then all this and shoot, today was busy. At least both his dinners were absolutely amazing.  

“Do you want to head out?” Nino grins at him, “I can even give you a lift if you want.”  

Adrien chuckles, “Why, Nino, if you wanted to hold me in your arms you only need to ask for a hug?”   

“I’ll keep it in mind.” Nino sits next to him, frowns softly. “But, seriously, you look exhausted. And, it’s, like, ten. Oh shit, is this that thing from last week? I wanted to ask you about it but-”  

“Nino, you had a lot on your plate, I’m not mad.” Adrien waves it away. “I just didn’t have my naps today. But- but I need to talk to you…”   

He cuts himself off with a yawn, stupid betraying body, and Nino pets his head. “Yep, that settles it. You gotta go back and crash.”   

“But-”  

“Hey Wayzz, literal embodiment of protection, do you think Adrien should go to sleep?”  

Pollen, as Plagg snickers quietly to himself, nods sagely, “It would be wise to listen to Wayzz, my King. He knows best on these matters.”  

But he suspects she’s only saying that because he saw the two of them fly off to try and talk during dinner. He doesn’t know why suddenly the whole ‘tell Nino he’s Chat Noir’ is getting put on pause, he can’t think of a single good reason and he wants to be done with it by now.  

“Oh yeah!” Gigga bobbles their head. “Not even Fluff can rival what he knows about helping.”   

Which, Wayzz does predictably say something about sleeping being best. It’s hard to hear everything, even with his sensitive ears, but it should be rather impossible for him to see Wayzz at all with Nino wearing his miraculous.  

“Alright!” Nino throws him a lopsided smirk. “Wayzz says you need to sleep. No arguing with him, I’m afraid.”   

“Yeah,” Adrien crosses his arms and slumps, glares over at Wayzz. “Well, I don’t wanna go back. So there.”   

Cause if he goes back then he’ll sleep and even going through the whole nightmare thing he needs to talk to Nino about the fact that he’s Chat Noir which is very important and he doesn’t want to just suffer with that any longer when Nino’s right here and he can just say something now rather than wallow-  

“Hey,” Nino frowns suddenly, “Wait, are you still getting nightmares?”  

Adrien blinks, “Uh… I mean, uh, no, wait, what? Of course not.”  

By the deepening frown, Adrien did not land that surprise question with a good lie.   

He slumps, “What gave it away?”  

“Honestly, Wayzz connected the dots first.” That checks out. “But why else would you need to take so many naps if you just… sleep through the night.”  

“The naps work.” Adrien sits up at the look he gets. “They do! I just- it’s better than nothing and I couldn’t get anything else to stick. Not unless it’s those, you know, black out sleeps but those aren’t restful at all. So, I’d rather just be up with you.”   

“Dude. That’s not-” Nino stops suddenly, glances at Wayzz, and Wayzz murmurs something too quiet for him to hear- “Wayzz has an idea.”  

“Wait,” Adrien sits up, mentally apologizing to Nino as he pauses the Chat Noir conversation again. But, honestly, he’ll do anything to get rid of these stupid nightmares and just sleep through the night again. He’ll even forgive Wayzz for delaying the conversation. “Really?”  

“Uh,” Nino huffs and rubs his neck before twisting on the couch and spreading his arms out. “I’ll take that hug now?”  

Adrien arches an eyebrow, though he obviously takes the hug because this is definitely just cuddling on the couch and he’d be an idiot to say no, and sighs against Nino’s shoulder.   

“If you’re about to tell me that a hug stops nightmares, that doesn’t fully work.” Adrien says as he snuggles closer and relishes the feel of Nino’s arms on his back. “I mean, it lowers stress which helps so I’m all for trying if you’re game.”  

Nino chuckles, “Hey, I can and will totally take you up on that if you let me.”  

“I simply wanted to see if this would work,” Wayzz- suddenly loud and clear that Adrien totally flinches against- pipes up. “But I see that it can.”   

“Wayzz.” Spinning, Adrien glances at the kwami who’s basically fully formed in front of him. “I- whoa, wait, I’ve definitely hugged you before-”  

“That was before Ladybug and Chat Noir spilt.” Wayzz tilts his head, squints and glances at Plagg. “Things are different now.”  

“Obviously.” Plagg growls back, the tense vibrations echoing down through his skull. “I’m keeping the ring controlled. I’m not- this isn’t good but it isn’t bad.”   

“Ugh,” Nino tilts his head into Adrien’s, “God, that.”   

“Um, is there something I’m missing here?” Since, as Chat Noir, all he knows is that the stress of it all is keeping him too on edge and reacting with the ring. Everything else is just awkward team dynamics.  

“It’s just,” Nino sighs, “You remember how on Friday Alya was wanting to know about some akuma? The one before the giant baby?”  

“…yes.”  

“Chat Noir got hit. And only him. I wasn’t there. But Ladybug-” Nino groans- “Apparently they were in a fight and then the akuma froze him and when he got out of it he was messed up and there, was, like, god, this explosions type thing. Ladybug’s been in hysterics since and, well, Chat…”   

Nino swallows, and Adrien inhales to tell him-  

“Chat isn’t great, but we can’t track him outside of akumas. Today’s was rough and, just…”  

“Master Nino,” Wayzz pats his head, “Let me tell Master Adrien the full story as to why the heroes are in such disarray.”   

“Yeah,” Plagg’s now even awake, squinting at Wayzz and then Pollen who flies up beside him. “Let’s.”  

Pollen fluffs up, “Wayzz has great advice, we would do well to listen.”  

“Creation and destruction work in harmony, in balance, and are meant to always be one with the other.” Wayzz stares at him, dead on, and Adrien shrinks slightly. “That night, creation and destruction ripped themselves apart. Thus the two forces are now clashing, wild, and will only get worse until they can come together again.”   

“Wait? Seriously?” Nino shrieks first. “You just said they’ve fallen out of rhythm.”  

“Well, it’s getting worse.”   

“I’ll say!” Gigga whips to him. “Creation and destruction have always been in perfect balance with each other. Who knows what can if that’s even slightly disturbed.”  

“We already know something’s happening,” Pollen gestures over at Wayzz, “If we can all see each other, even when Adrien isn’t wearing the miraculous, that means the magic that the order used to create and maintain our miraculous is unraveling. At least in proximity to Plagg!”  

“Whoa! Hey! I’ve been spending all my energy keeping it together! Now you’re telling me-”  

“Okay,” Adrien snaps, slightly, quieting them all. “That’s bad. And something that I really wished waited until morning.” After Adrien told Nino he was Chat Noir. After he got through all of this because now if he tells Nino he’s Chat Noir he’s going to freak out-  

“I want you to have the full picture.” Wayzz shakes his head again. “It was not my intention for you make you aware of the storm so you could drown, but so you could see how to ride the waves until it passes.”   

“And,” Pollen continues, “Wayzz has discussed with me certain health problems-”  

Plagg groans, “Seriously? This again, I’m telling you-”  

“I mean,” Nino mutters, “It is nice you can hear Wayzz. It’s weird being the only one who can hear him.”  

Adrien inhales, understanding greatly. “Yeah, I don’t know how you didn’t go crazy.”   

“It was the worst during school and he’d say something and I’d just have to not react.”  

“Hmm, yeah…” There’s a sudden release within him, body slumping, and a wave of exhaustion replaces it. But, but he needs to Nino still about Chat Noir and now it’s all calmer again and… and… “It’s rough.”  

“Yeah… hey, are you falling asleep?”  

“Do not be alarmed, Master Adrien,” Wayzz says, and now that he focuses he can feel the seeping strength of that miraulous rolling through him. “You will not have any nightmare.”   

“But…” God, his body is melting. Even trying to breath quickly just… isn’t… working. “I…”  

“Let it rest until morning,” Wayzz says, specifically glancing at Plagg. “It is wise to pace yourself.”   

Well, if Wayzz says so then maybe Adrien will just…  

 

A prickling itchy sensation at his ear wakes up him, and with the least amount of movement possible Adrien just tilts his head to rub it against… a breathing chest.  

“Nino…?” Nino. Talking. Falling asleep because Wayzz ruined his plan here. Adrien just wanted to get everything over with and now he just really wants to keep sleeping and put it off until then.   

“Gods…” Nino sighs and then gently shakes his shoulder. “Come on, my back is killing me. We just need to move over to the bed.”  

“Hmmm… okay,” Adrien supposes that will let him sleep again. And then Nino will be comfortable. Good plan.   

Getting up is weird. His body doesn’t feel entirely attached to him, looser and cool and this warm pleasant type ache to them which is strange. But there’s Nino. Smiling and steadying him towards the bed that Adrien flops back down on. Which, ah, this is the best bed ever. It has surreal melting qualities.  

A quiet chuckle sags his attention. “Comfy?”  

Adrien hums a no and pushes one arm out, clawing and grabbing at the air. Nino falls into that space, and Adrien sighs out a smile as he gets the chance to snuggle back onto his chest. Much better. Yeah, Adrien’s going to go to sleep again.    

 

“I can’t believe I’m going to school in a limo,” Nino tugs his hat down as they settle in. “Just, wow.”  

“Just don’t let Noel get too jealous.” Adrien mutters, rubbing at his eyes. His contacts have dried out and are terribly irritating. He has spares in his locker that he’ll have to switch out with.   

His bad mood mostly has to do with the fact that he didn’t get up early enough to put on his makeup- sorry Nino’s pillow, that definitely needs to get washed now- and evitable a terrible picture of him is going to go online and then Father will see and that will be a mess. Especially since Father doesn’t currently know that he wasn’t in the house and Adrien doesn’t want Nathalie to have to deal with the stress afterwards.  

It’s just sprinkles on top that he didn’t have a chance to say he’s Chat Noir to Nino. Hope Wayzz is happy then, but at least they got halfway through it with the admission that Adrien knows about Carapace.  

“Dude, how can you be tired? You slept forever.” Nino says, slightly mockingly but also smiling wide and softly that Adrien melts a little too.  

And he does feel exceptionally well rested. His body feels good. Which is weird since he isn’t transformed, and he really needs to tell Nino he’s Chat Noir for the simple fact that then they can spend more time together without him just falling asleep or barely squeezing out some time to be with him.  

“Yeah, sorry about that. I wanted to hear what you’re going to be working on for this coming Challenge.”   

It doesn’t seem real, that Nino’s still doing that. Important, yes, but that was Simon Says and then Friday was the mess of his fight with Ladybug and Saturday he remembers watching it and texting Nino but he was so tired and stressed that the memory seems glossy.   

But Nino smiles and pulls out the remixes, and Adrien swaddles himself in the music and Nino’s excited rambling and hand gestures.   

“But dude, they won’t even give me a hint for the next competitor this Saturday!” Nino groans as they pull up to the school. “Sure, I’ve been on the spot for the other stuff but I don’t even have an idea the genre!”   

“I’m sure you’ll do great, you’ve done amazing so far and that’s how you got here.” Adrien leans forward towards his bodyguard. “Hey, this isn’t getting to Father, will it?”  

He gets a grunt and a grin, and Adrien beams back at him. “Thanks man!”   

“Look at you,” Nino elbows his side once they’re both walking up the steps, “Being all rebellious. I’m so proud.”  

Adrien huffs, “Just wait until I tell you the bigger stuff.”  

“Bigger stuff?” Nino arches an eyebrow and throws an arm him. “Seems kinda fake if you ask me.”  

“If this is you baiting me, not going to work.” Adrien leans into him with a smirk. “You’ll have to wait until we aren’t in school.”  

“Darn,” Nino lets out a dramatic sigh, “Worth a shot.”  

“Yo, Adrien! Nino!” Kim beams at him the very moment he and Nino walk into the lockers. “If you could be any superhero, who would you be?”   

“Chat Noir.” He says, continuing to walk to his locker. Doing his best not to grin as Plagg chuckles in his hair.  

“Really?” Lila hums, “You’d want to be Chat Noir? He’s the most… chaotic out of all of them.”  

“In what way?” He narrows his eyes squashing the urge to scowl. “Chat Noir is by far the most reliable hero with the greatest ability of adaptability even considering Ladybug’s lucky charm. He routinely baits the akuma to targeting him rather than civilians, studying them for weakness, and then makes the attack alongside Ladybug and the others.”  

Sure he isn’t doing that now , but he is still a superhero! He’s a good one!  

Nino glances at him from the side before shrugging over at Kim. “What does it even matter?”  

Nathaniel groans at his locker, “Max made some claim about the best versatile superhero, and Kim bet it was another.”   

“And I’m right! Carapace doesn’t have the speed to get across the city.”   

Nino jolts at that, turning around immediately and staring at his locker. Adrien just chuckles quietly to himself and does the same, he needs to stay out of this argument and he’s having a much better time watching Nino get flustered.  

Max huffs, “Compared to the other heroes though, he’s best suited to protect the citizens and potentially trap the akuma until evacuation.”   

“That’s not right,” Marinette walks up to the little circle they’ve formed, strangely upfronted. “All the heroes are suited to protect Paris. Ladybug could create a protection lucky charm, Chat Noir could destroy the threats before they hit anyone, and Rena Rouge can make it so the akuma doesn’t even know where to shoot. Carapace’s powers are just most directly applicable.”   

Alya nods next to her friend, “Yeah, that’s true. What about that, Max? Who’s the versatile now?”  

“Guys,” Nino pipes up, rubbing at his neck, “Does it matter?”  

“Well yeah,” Alix drawls as she shuts her locker. “If I’m in an area with an akuma and only one hero is there, I gotta know whether or not to help.”   

Marinette frowns at her, “No one other than the superheroes should get involved with akumas.” To make her point clear, she even elbows Alya in the ribs.  

Adrien turns to Alya. “Why don’t you run a poll on the blog? It’s been a while since you broke down their strengths. And, like Alix said, it could help people on how to react.”  

“What do you mean? Like Marinette said, everyone should just leave.”  

“Well, like, if Carapace needs to put up a shellter, people should try to stay together. If it’s Rena, they need to hide and be quieter. People need to get out as quickly as possible with Chat Noir, as he can distract and keep them safe for a while, but not for so long and reliably. And I guess Ladybug could adapt to the situation.”   

“That’s a good point…” Max mutters, “I’ll need to run calculations then on which hero has the highest chance to be successful against the widest range of akumas and the different applications of their powers.”  

Kim snorts, “Well, if you’re bringing powers into it, then clearly it’s Ladybug.”  

Max gives him a flat look, “Kim, I was always taking their powers into consideration.”   

“How was I supposed to know that?”   

Rose giggles as her and Juleka enter in, “Aw Kim, whatever it is, it’s okay!”  

“It has to be the fox,” Nathaniel shrugs and looks down as he speaks. “She’d have the easiest time using her powers outside of fighting, so she’s hands down the most versatile.”   

Alya frowns, and she isn’t the only one as Alix punches Nathaniel’s shoulder. “Dude, you think she could get away with that? Ladybug would be on her ass like dogs on peanut butter. Even Chat Noir and Ladybug are at it with how he’s used his powers.”  

Adrien turns away from the conversation at that, trying not to let that hit him as Nathenial replies “She could practice presentations, arguments, could kill it in theater. She wouldn’t need to look up references! She could just create the illusion and then draw it! Damn, I would kill for that.”   

The ringing bell forces Adrien to deal with his locker immediately, rushing and making a mess as the conversation continues as the class leaves. Pairs splitting as they all talk about what superhero trait that they’d consider most useful.  

“Can’t believe you said Chat Noir, dude.” Nino grins at him as they, plus Marinette and Alya, head to science. “Maybe you can convince your pops to have you model him one day.”  

Alya snorts, “Imagine if you did that after Chat Noir booted you off as the number 1 hottie. Everyone would go nuts.”  

Alya looks at Marinette after saying that, perhaps excepting her to agree, but Marinette only hums. Otherwise not commenting, likely not even engaged with the conversation at all with how she stares forward. Maybe he can talk to Alya if something’s wrong. It’s strange to see Marinette so… calm and distant.  

“I’m not sure if I can be on his level.” Adrien says, restraining his smile as Gigga and Pollen giggle. “I mean, I think I can work black, but not like him.”   

Nino throws his arm around him, eyes bright. “Trust me man, Chat Noir should be the jealous one. No one works black like you.”  

Pollen and Gigga only laugh harder, and he hopes Wayzz can see the suffering in his eyes since he’s the one that made Adrien fall asleep rather than telling Nino his identity.   

“Agreed.” Alya flashes a smirk at him, “At least you’re not tied down to the cat theme.”   

“Hey, I think the cat theme is awesome. I would wear it, but it’s just-” His phone buzzes with Chloe’s pattern, everyone’s phones going off too, and Adrien slides it out- “not practical for the fashion shows that Father wants me to do…”  

The message was to the group chat. A picture and caption. She’s off to New York, she says, posing with a hat, and Adrien watches as the little message pops up that she’s left the group chat.   

His phone buzzes again, a separate message to him, telling him to take care and to remember to be a bitch to anyone who gives him anything.  

“Dude? Everything alright?” Nino’s looking at him. Not walking. Since, yeah, Adrien’s stopped walking too. He’s not moving.  

But Chloe is.  

“Chloe’s gone!” Alya laughs, throwing her hands up high as she looks at the message and high-fiving Marinette.   

It shouldn’t be able to get worse. After Friday. That’s supposed to be the worst of it. What could be worse than that? Hearing the distrust from Ladybug, knowing that she contributed to events of Plagg’s theft and the loneliness and guilt as he studied the miraculous, realizing the scars on his mind came because she trusted Fu over him. A betrayal he still can’t think of very long without getting upset. Even if Ladybug tells him she doesn’t talk to him anymore. He can’t trust that. He can’t even fully trust Carapace because of her, not until Nino knows that he’s Chat Noir, too unsure if he would attack on her orders.  

But he could trust Chloe. Every time, when he went to Chloe she was there. Every time, giving him support even if he didn’t truly support her methods she was there.  

And all of that shatters in his chest.   

She’s leaving. She won’t be here. She’s going away and he can’t follow. She’s leaving.  

She didn’t even say goodbye .   

Nino chuckles and nudges him, “Now she can’t just grab at you, am I right- whoa, hey, Adrien?”  

“I have to go.” He backs away from them, shoving that horrible message into his pocket where it just continues to burn. Burning and burning, spreading to his eyes as he flares his nose out. Dimly watching as their joy pauses on their faces. “See you later.”   

“Adrien- wait!” Marinette calls, but he doesn’t turn around.   

“What about class?” Alya yells too, but he doesn’t care about that.  

“Dude,” Nino’s walking beside him, and he can’t- Adrien needs him to go before- before- “Just take a deep breath. You can still call her and everything, it’ll be alright.”  

It’ll be alright.   

Adrien freezes, trembles.   

It’ll be alright.  

What a load of fucking bullshit.   

Just a stupid phrase of pleasantries and falsehood. A way to cover up the fact that it is never going to be alright. That things will just keep deteriorating the moment they start. That eventually the memory of it will deteriorate so much it won’t hurt anymore. That’s all it says. It doesn’t actually help.  

Adrien hasn’t been alright in months!  

“Don’t say things- don’t lie to me.” He hisses out, “You don’t know that! Nothing is ever going to be alright!”   

Nino blinks, his face loudly declaring his worry. “Whoa, okay, Adrien, it’s not the end-”  

“Really? Because the only thing we know for sure about anything is that it ends !”  

Adrien huffs, turns sharply away because he can’t be here. He can’t be talked to like this. He needs to- he needs to talk to Chloe. Now. Before she goes. Before she decides to live permanently with her stupid awful mother won’t even care to learn her name or her interests, nevermind her well-being. At the very least Adrien needs to make sure that she knows he’s here, always willing to listen, even it’s an ocean away.  

Even if- even if they can’t actually be there for one another he can at least listen. Maybe that’ll be good enough.  

“My King, deep breaths.” Pollen flies beside him, Gigga making the motions with all their arms beside her.   

“Adrien-” Nino’s running up to him again- “I’m really just-”  

Adrien stops. Holds up a hand to Nino as Pollen visibly flinches and trembles, Gigga flying to his head to wake Plagg up.   

“Uh, whoa, okay, umm… what’s wrong?”  

Adrien glances at Pollen, and she frowns. “An akuma was created, their powers have a huge range of control- almost complete dominion- but I can’t tell what. Or even how Hawk Moth could give a champion such powers when its foreign nature of it should have to come from my domain.”  

Adrien takes a deep breath and turns to Nino. “You’re right. Yeah, but, I can’t be here. Okay? I’ll, I’ll take a walk to the park-”  

“Cool!” Nino’s shoulders slump down, not quite relaxed fully. “Mind if I tag along then? Always down for ditching class.”   

“Sure.” The akuma alarm will have to be going off soon, and Nino won’t have to make excuses for him to get away. Practically, it makes the most sense. It’s why he didn’t just storm off.   

But Nino’s here now. Quietly walking next to him, fingers tapping much too rapidly to be calm, and that sucks. Knowing Nino’s upset because of him. Feeling Nino right beside him, thoughtless fears gnawing at the edges of him because if Chloe can decide to leave and Ladybug can betray him and Father can push him away then isn’t it only inevitable that something happens until Nino’s out of his grasp as well?  

It's tragic and awful that the kwamis aren’t free to roam the world, but right now, twirling his ring, he is so very grateful that they can’t just abandon him whenever. They have to talk first.   

Unless a miraculous is stolen. And then Adrien can’t talk to them at all until the miraculous is found again. They can’t control when they’ll be taken from him. In a single instance, they could be gone.  

Adrien trembles, grits his teeth and stares at the front entrance. He just needs to get through the door.   

“Huling! Jump back!”   

Adrien grabs Nino’s arms and jerks them both back. The akuma is tall, not beyond human standards but leering down just the same, blueskinned. Neither of which are traits that Napoleon had, which the design seems to be inspired by, but that’s not Adrien’s issue right now.   

It’s Chloe’s father, the mayor. And something about that has given his akuma a degree of control unheard of in other akumas.   

“Okay!” Nino grabs his arm now and starts running. “Go! Go! Go!”  

“Adrien Agreste,” Hearing his name makes him stumble, muscles struggling to tense up and his emotions go all soft and floppy in him. “By the power vested in me, I name you my executioner.”   

And it all just flows away, and Adrien comes to a standstill.   

Executioner. That’s his purpose then.   

“Shit!” Nino keeps tugging on his arm. “Dude, let’s go.”   

He is Malediktator’s executioner. No one else’s. He will execute only his commands. He stays still and Nino swallows heavily before letting go and running on his own.  

“Kit?” Plagg claps in front of his eyes. “Kit! Damnit! We lost his mind!”   

“His soul though?” Pollen hovers nervously. “It is unaffected?”  

“By the power vested in me, I give you control over the form of this pen.” Maledikator hands him the pen, and Adrien keeps it that way. He has no need for anything else.  

“Yeah, it’s still good, but we’ve got a disconnect between that and the mind.” Plagg continues, “He won’t be able to sense anything that he’s doing unless it’s, like, death or something.”  

“Could you force a transformation?” Gigga questions. “You could destroy the effects then.”  

Both Plagg and Pollen stare at them in horror, Pollen rapidly shaking her head. “A kwami barging into a soul without a prompt is exceedingly dangerous. We cannot risk it. Especially not with Plagg.”  

“Ah, that’s a no then.”  

“Adrien,” Malediktator nods at him, “You are to keep Chloe in Paris at all costs.”  

“It shall be done.” Adrien bows, stares at the pen in his hand as he decides what tool he needs to execute this task.   

“Hey fatty!” Carapace yells, shield hurtling towards them faster than Adrien’s seen it go. “Get away from him!”   

Malediktator sidesteps it, jumps up to the roof. “Such disobedience. Adrien, neutralize the threat. I will deal with Chloe.”   

The pen morphs into a sword, a rapier, and Adrien lunges. His body moves, blurring between moves, mixes of fencing and savate. The ingrained fighting that has come from miraculous, knowledge of his time with Wayzz and of Carapace bleeding into his movements as he anticipates and counters.   

“Shellter!”   

Adrien stops still at the green bubble that appears around him. As indestructible as the will of the one transformed with the turtle miraculous.   

“Carapace!” Ladybug swings down, Rena hot on her tall. “What happened here?”  

“An akuma, the mayor probably, has this phrase that completely took over him.” Nino gestures to him. “And had a hecking pen turn into a sword, so that’s fun.”   

Rena changes her flute to communication. “Okay, I’ll let Chat know to transform with the bee miraculous. That’ll be more helpful for this akuma.”   

“Ah,” Pollen trembles, “That’s unfortunate.”  

Nino is distracted. His will is spilt.   

Adrien wills the pen to cut through the magic of the miraculous. He knows what that is, how to manipulate it. Imagines the runes needed and it charges with the powers of destruction and subjection.  

He will neutralize the threat.   

Carapace. Rena Rouge. Ladybug.  

“Okay, let’s-”  

Adrien thrusts forward, the shellter shattering and the heroes scattering as he attacks. Rena engages directly, trying to lock him into a hold, and Adrien lets her be partly successful. Shrinking the rapier down into a dagger and slashing her side as she throws him down.   

“AH!” Rena loses grip, staggering back. The orange of her costume darkening into red. “What the-”  

Adrien rushes her, slides down as the shield and yoyo come after him. The dagger growing back into the deadly point of his rapier. He doesn’t need to hurt her, only to spook her. Get her to startle enough to protect herself rather than the necklace. Once he has Trixx, Rena Rouge will be neutralized.   

“I got it!” Plagg shouts. “Drama queen! You’re no longer connected to Adrien!”  

“I’m well aware of that!” Pollen snaps as Rena manages to land a kick on his knee, forcing his weight to the side and to retreat before she crushes him.   

“Restore!” Ladybug shouts, the yoyo hitting him in retreat. He stills for a moment, blanking on his purpose, but then it fills up again.   

The threats must be neutralized. It is his duty to execute the command.   

“Shellter!” Carapace calls after he starts running towards Ladybug, hands out and straining as he funnels his powers through it. “Okay, how the hell did he get through that?”  

“I don’t know!” Ladybug yells, “It’s your shellters!”  

Adrien focuses on the inner runes on his tool again. Adding more, strengthening them. He needs to wait a few more moments for them to charge again.  

“You can’t hurt his soul though! If you try to force your powers onto his mind!” Plagg rushes. “I can let my influence seep a little more-”  

“No!” Gigga cries, “That’ll degrade the integrity of his body! It’s already much too weak!”   

“Well,” Rena scowls as Ladybug rushes to her side, her hands glowing softly over Rena’s wound. “Can’t you do barrier?”  

“-I don’t have a whole of other ideas right now!”   

“I literally learned how to do that two days ago! And that was BEFORE he got hit!”  

“It might work! Let’s try it!”   

Adrien thrusts the sword into the shellter. It cracks but doesn’t break, green sparks bursting from the tip as he pushes it harder.   

“That-” Carapace drops to a knee, arms shaking- “How… I won’t be able to hold it-”  

“My turn then,” Rena begins to play her flute once Ladybug finishes, a bright ball of light forming at the end and she hurtles it at him. “Deceive!”  

The world blooms with new sights and sounds, the heroes vanishing. That is false, but Adrien can’t be sure of how. Though he’s sure that the shellter isn’t gone yet, so he keeps going at it.   

When there’s a give, Adrien shifts the rapier into goggles. The illusion over him is destroyed with them with the runes he embeds into them, and he rushes Rena again. Still hurt and she’s the worst at hand-to-hand combat.  

“Alleviate,” Pollen shouts out.  

Adrien staggers, blinking and stumbling since, Rena. Rena’s hurt, he should help-  

Neutralize the threats. Rena Rouge is a threat.  

“Again!” Gigga cries, “It worked a little!”  

“Alleviate!”   

Adrien’s sight goes fuzzy, head throbbing and heart pounding desperately and his muscles are burning with effort, all of which is quickly ignored at the green blur coming at him. He needs to dodge and then go hunker somewhere to recover-   

Neutralize the threats. Execute the task.  

Adrien dodges, then plows into Carapace’s side. Jabs into his side, exactly how Fu did to him to mess with his transformation with Wayzz. Carapace stumbles and falls, and- quickly ducking under the yoyo- Adrien reaches for his miraculous.   

“ALLEVIATE!” Pollen screams desperately and-  

This is Nino. Adrien can’t take his miraculous he can’t-  

Execute the task.   

No!  

Neutralize the-  

I refuse!   

Adrien’s body jerks, hands still reaching-  

I will not do this! Not to Nino! Not to anyone!  

Ladybug grabs him, a threat. She needs to be neutralized. Adrien throws his feet up, twisting up and over her, fingers ready to pluck the miraculous from her ears-  

No! I decide who’s the threat! I decide what to do!  

He stumbles back, recovering his landing perfectly, and catches Carapace’s shield and ignores the bright pain flaring up as he tosses it aside.   

This is my soul- my body! My domain! It is mine!  

Adrien blinks, gasping as feelings and emotion rush back through his body. He convulses down, throwing up because holy shit that was way too much movement way too fast without stretching or a miraculous.   

“Adrien!”   

He can still feel it, pounded on his skin, execute. Neutralize. Find Chloe and keep her in Paris. It’s all there. Pounding loudly on his skull, demanding to be let in.   

“Oh god,” Nino slides down on knees, supporting him as Adrien pushes himself up. “Dude, how’d- are you alright?”  

“Never better.” Adrien rasps, takes off the goggles- and he can feel Nino but he disappears- and groans. “Can we take the illusion off?”  

“Oh, yeah, reality!”  

Adrien morphs the sword into something more like his baton, extending it to push him up and then using it as a cane to lean on. He’s standing. It sucks and it’s awful, but he’s goddamnit doing it and no one else.   

“My King! Thank goodness!”   

“That’s what I’m talking about Kit!” They lightly headbutt, “No one tells us what to do!”  

“Adrien Agreste,” Ladybug stands before him and-  

The cane morphs, a metal gauntlet covering up his right hand and the ring. The tips of his fingers covered with sharp points of metal.   

Claws.  

“The akuma is Malediktator, area affect type powers. If I had to guess, he can have control of anything within Paris. There must be some limit, since otherwise why even allow you all to transform? Anyway, he wants Chloe to stay in Paris.” Adrien sighs, steps back. “That’s all I know. So, um, sorry, I guess, for attacking.”  

“Wait,” Ladybug’s looking at him, eyes calculating and alight with plans. “Do you know where the akuma is?”  

“Oh, I think it’s in his sash, but I can’t be sure.”   

“Can you get close to his side?”  

“Absolutely not!” Nino barks, “Hell no! Adrien- we- he’s not bait!”   

“It could work,” Rena hums, “Only if Adrien’s cool with it.”  

“’friad not.” Adrien gives them a watery smile. “My head is killing me with the whole trying to fight you guys, but-” Focusing on his gauntlet, it morphs into a helmet with all the control and destruction runes to keep other powers out- “Since you did such a fine job protecting me Monday, I’d like to return the favor. It’ll inert Malediktator’s powers. Until they realize that and get rid of command on it, but until then, well, I hope it helps.”  

“Thank you, uh, yeah, thank you.” Nino pushes his hoody off and puts in on instead. Shooting him a smile. “So, how do I look?”  

Adrien smiles back, “Like you’ve got a real good shot a being a model. If the whole superhero thing doesn’t work out.”  

Nino huffs, shakes his head. “I think I’ll leave that to you dude, much rather help keep Chloe safe.”  

And Adrien just about melts, because he knows Nino doesn’t like Chloe at all, and gives a little wave as they bound away.  

Plagg sighs, “I guess this is our cue then. Whelp-”  

“No.” Adrien sighs, bones heavy just at the thought of going. “I think they’ve got it.”  

Pollen frowns at him, “Are you alright?”  

“Just tired,” He mutters. “I’m just really tired.”  

Which is strange, finally getting a good night’s sleep. But, with everything just one fail after another with other people, Adrien does just want to curl up in his room and stay there for a long time. He will tell Nino. Even if he has to send a letter to him to finally get the message across, but not now.   

He’ll rest first.  

“Alright then,” Gigga perches on one shoulder as Plagg climbs back up to his hair. “Another nap does sound pretty nice.”  

“Obviously,” Plagg kneads and curls up into his hair.  

Pollen takes the other shoulder, “To home then.”  

Adrien sighs again, but he smiles a bit.   

They’ll rest first.  

 

 

It doesn’t take long to get to Chloe’s room, a minute or two, maybe.  

It takes him ten to finally stop looking at her. She’s in her pjs, plain white silk draped over her shoulders and the pant cuffs pooling at her feet, just sitting on the couch. Her phone lights up on the end table every few seconds, but she just stares down at her lap. Unmoving.  

He takes a deep breath when he raises his hand up. While right now he’s just Chat Noir, a superhero but not Chloe’s idol, he still knows her as Adrien. She can’t know that, but, he will be there for her whether she knows it or not.   

“Please, my King,” Pollen nods, “She needs us.”  

Adrien knocks. He can’t really argue with all that happened. Her father’s akumatization, the following argument she later texted him about, talking about her as if some piece of jewelry, her mother leaving again.   

Chloe looks up with a frown, blinking at him before an increasingly suspicious face takes over as she walks over and opens the door. “What are you doing here?”  

“Is a social visit too much to ask for?”  

“Yes,” She snaps into a scowl. “It is.”   

Adrien simply smiles, reaching up to grab the miraculous from his hair. He already soaked in a little extra power from Pollen, an ache buzzing over his head, while watching Chloe, so there’s no need to draw this out.   

“I’m not the one asking.”   

Chloe gasps, snatching the miraculous and shoving it into her hair. “Pollen! I’ve missed you!”   

The kwami snuggles up to her cheek. “And I, you, my Queen.”   

At the first sniff Chloe lets out, she immediately straightens to look back at him. “Ladybug said she wasn’t going to give me the miraculous again.”   

“I do bee-lieve you misunderstood me then. This is only a visit, Pollen has to come back with me by the end.”  

“Cute,” Chloe isn’t any less tense, her smile one that could cut glass. “Now give me the reason why you went behind Ladybug’s back.”  

He holds his claws up, trying not to smile at how beautiful it is to see Chloe’s managing to be critical. After everything that the media’s been speculating about the two of them, he was worried about her opinion of Ladybug or of him and immediately jump to a conclusion. Then add how Chloe transformed, everything way too emotional to come out perfectly when Queen Bee first made an appearance, and he thought that she might just react. He knows Chloe struggles with her impulses, that she still does, but she’s fighting to be different. To think first, judge for herself rather than just with streotypes.  

“May I come in first? I’ll explain it all.”   

Chloe glances over at Pollen, who instantly starts nodding. “Trust me, my Queen, Chat Noir’s soul is very sincere. He came here with the intention of bringing your mood up, not to taunt or tease or to use you in an argument against Ladybug.”   

“Very well,” She huffs and turns back, “Only because Pollen said so.”   

“I’ll be on my best behavior then, your Highness.” Slipping in, Adrien closes the door and only freaks out for about a second. Everything’s going much better than he feared!  

Chloe settles in on the chair, cupping Pollen who’s snuggling up Chloe’s neck. “Okay, Chat Noir, explain away.”  

“With your identity exposed, others and especially Hawk Moth will want their hands on the miraculous. I’m sure you know already how not pretty it is, and we got lucky with how overconfident Hawk Moth was with your akumatization. He could have brought you to him and just taken the bee miraculous.”  

Chloe blinks at him, “You’re horribly failing if you thought that was going to make me feel better.”   

“And that’s why I avoid the press.” He waves that away. “Anyway, that’s why you’ve never been given the bee miraculous again despite your fit with Pollen.”  

“I see…” Chloe’s lips press into a tight line and her hand closes more firmly around Pollen. “So is this a goodbye visit then.”  

Pollen nuzzles back, “This will not be the last time you see me, my Queen.”  

“Yeah, I’ll come back a few more times with her.” Adrien nods along. “Pollen resonates with your soul strongest, especially after using the miraculous, and don’t quite lose hope. There might be a way around for you to transform with no one the wiser but I’d have to talk with you about other things and you should just take the time to enjoy time with Pollen.”   

“Hey, you can see her? But-”  

“I did use the bee miraculous not even a week ago, and I do like to think I know how to use the miraculous decently at this point.”   

Chloe hums, “That’s right, then why couldn’t you take over again?”  

“I specifically needed to use the bee because of some problems I had using my ring. I could temporary fill in if it was urgent we needed those powers and I wasn’t needed as Chat Noir. Yet, the rush and elation you get when you transform? That gives me a headache, I don’t resonate with Pollen as well.”  

Pollen huffs, “I would like to mention, my King, you were an excellent wielder and preserved through challenging circumstances.”  

“Thank you Pollen, but I would really rather not ever do it again. Since then I can’t have you talking to me and giving amazing ideas.”  

She grins at him, and how could he resist grinning back.   

Chloe clears her throat, “I thought we were talking about me here? So is this so pity then? Make me feel better about getting the boot so I don’t become some mega-akuma?”  

“I do feel bad for you. If I transformed and then I couldn’t, ever again, even if I knew why, I’d long for it constantly. Just a week without being Chat Noir, and using another miraculous, and I almost wept with joy running around as me again.”  

That gets her to crack a small, but real smile as she looks away. “I did. Do. When I asked Ladybug to give me another chance, that I could save the day, and then… I know why she didn’t. I do, but then to see you using the miraculous-” She sharply shakes her head once her voice breaks.   

“I’m sorry, I can’t imagine how awful that was.”  

“It was smart. I shouldn’t use a miraculous and it would be ridiculous to have such a powerful kwami on the sideline.”   

“But it won’t ever feel like a good decision. Your very soul sings when untied with Pollen, you’ll never be okay with this decision no matter how many times you say you are. And that’s okay, it doesn’t mean you hate Ladybug and it doesn’t make you any less of a person.”   

That was a little bit too much inside information from knowing her as Adrien, and he half braced himself in case she lashes out at him, but her bottom lip only quivers for a few seconds before she stills it. Pollen gently wiggling out to brush aside her tears.   

“It is okay, my Queen, I miss you very much too and sometimes dislike Ladybug because of it as well.”   

Pollen says that as if Adrien hasn’t overheard her with Plagg and Gigga utterly seething against her. Trying to convince them that they should convince him to destroy the glamor hiding her.  

He’s not going to do that. He doesn’t even want to know who Ladybug is. He- thinking about it hurts.  

Giving Chloe a few moments to compose herself, allowing her to take in Pollen and letting her forget about his presence, he absently wonders what Plagg would say to Ladybug if given the chance.  

Adrien doesn’t want to think about that either. So he imagines 24/7 complaining about cheese and never finding the perfect place to nap, deciding that he can’t let Ladybug ever have his ring simply to spare her from Plagg. That’s all.  

“So, I want you to know, that even if you can’t be Queen Bee ever again, you are still friends with Pollen. Eventually, like I said, we might find a work around with you transforming, but don’t get too hopeful about that.”   

Chloe huffs, an eyebrow raising back to her normal composure. “Just to be clear, Ladybug knows about this?”  

His ears drop as he shrugs, “Well… we still aren’t… it’s still a little rough so maybe once everything calms down, but, uh, I didn’t want you to have to wait longer until that settles.”  

Pollen nudges Chloe’s cheek before settling on her shoulder again.   

“I… thank you, Chat Noir. It really means a lot to me.”   

“Of course,” Adrien stands and stretches, “Well, I’ll be back then ladies. Sometime in the morning, don’t you dare transform even if there’s no risk of being seen, and oh yeah,” He takes out the jam packets and sets them on one of the tables. “Pollen likes jam.”  

“Wa- wait.” Chloe stands to, looking between the jam and him. “You’re leaving…?”  

“I mean, I have to come back for Pollen. But I’d rather not third wheel here.” Besides, Chloe is oscillating between composed and breaking down more than he thought. He didn’t expect her to be comfortable enough with Chat Noir to show anything, and he knows sticking around will make her defensive and angry that he can see it until she’s more comfortable with him.  

He’ll likely swing down to his hideout. At least he won’t feel like he’s ignoring Pollen when he talks with Gigga about everything he’s learned about the other miraculous and kwamis. Plagg’s usually asleep, so he doesn’t count.   

“Well then,” Chloe huffs, “What are you doing just standing around here then? Go on, shoo!”   

Smiling, he bows to them outside on the patio. “Until later then, your Highnesses.”   

Pollen beams back at him while Chloe just waves him away, and he bounds out back into the city. Letting his smile now completely overtake his face, and even by the time he gets all the way down into the sewers, he thinks that he might just split in joy.   

Chloe cares, she’s opening up, and he’s sure when he talks to her as Adrien tomorrow, she’ll stay.   

And even if she leaves, she’s not going to leave him without a goodbye or an explanation. He’ll know, whether through Chat Noir or as Adrien, she won’t just disappear on him.   

He has Chloe. He doesn’t have to doubt that anymore.  

Chapter 17: Hero's Day

Plagg is still asleep.

Which is good. Plagg’s been exhausted since Friday, and Adrien can’t help. Only trying to find ways that makes it easier if he messes up. Wearing the gloves and the contacts, transforming less, using his powers even less frequently. Still Plagg’s exhausted. Constantly monitoring and controlling his power leaking through the ring so Adrien doesn’t suffer.

Gigga’s up though, watching whatever show Adrien left on for the kwamis.

“You know,” Gigga starts when Adrien sits next to them. “Fu has lived dozens of human lifetimes.”

Adrien bites his lip, a nervous tick he usually can’t ever show, but usually the fallout for saying the wrong thing isn’t this big. Not when Adrien can remember those eyes glaring before Gigga flies away from him in the sewers, devastated after learning what happened to their last holder.

“Is that one of your powers?”

“Not really. All miraculous transformations enhance the body, and he learned how to keep himself from aging using that power. It’s like a disease, aging. Cells slowly crumbling on the inside.”

That’s morbid. Adrien supposes that it is the middle of the night when thoughts like these are easier. And Gigga’s been watching this… medical drama? Which, now that he thinks about it, might not be inspiring really great memories for Gigga either.

“Why?” Adrien eventually asks. “Why would he do that?”

Fu wouldn’t know anyone other than Gigga after a while. And, if Adrien only had Plagg for hundreds of years, he’d go berserk if someone stole him. And he can’t imagine that Plagg would be as easygoing as Gigga has been about this whole situation.

“Guilt. Shame.” Gigga stares forward, “I am now very knowledgeable about those emotions.”

Adrien isn’t that surprised. Maybe the bastard stole Gigga too and then-

“Wait,” Adrien sits up, “He was a part of that old order. The makers of the miraculous.”

“I think so.” Gigga shrugs, “It’s been so long, I don’t remember.”

“But he was there! He could have told you-”

“He didn’t.” The flat tone of it kills the words inside him, a shiver going down his spine. “If anything, he used my powers to forget.”

Adrien hasn’t spent a lot of time contemplating Gigga as the kwami of Ignorance. Only that they have the power of stupefy and that Fu had them and they love knowledge and talking and exploring and trying new foods. Maybe he should have spent more time learning about them, asking questions, but, it’s just with everything that happened- Adrien’s only known Gigga for a week and a half- he just didn’t have it in him. Gigga’s still here, not running off to Fu or demanding to be taken to Ladybug, and Adrien just selfishly wants to keep it that way.

“Do you…” Adrien hesitates, he can’t make Gigga more upset but, but after seeing them turn away in the fake reality then it would be better now. Handle here than out there.

“Do you remember?”

“I remember routine, that there was one. I remember being upset that we always had to be transformed when we went out, never really able to see or do anything. And after seeing your runes, I think I used to be a part of something similar. At least it doesn’t feel new, feeling my domain shift like that. Like the knowledge was already known at some point.”

“Yeah, but…” Adrien takes a deep breath, “But do you remember the people? The other- the other kwamis?”

“Not the people.”

Adrien flounders a little, because that wasn’t an answer to both questions. That wasn’t an answer and he already pressed once and if Gigga isn’t comfortable sharing then he doesn’t know what to say now that they’re clearly upset about something. Maybe Adrien can just… smile? Offer food? Those are usually pretty good tricks at making people feel better or-

“But-” Gigga trembles, four arms reaching and covering their eyes- “I don’t- I can’t remember what Fluff sounds like. Or Liiri’s laugh. Or the feel of one of Nooroo’s hugs. Or when Duusu would talk to me about these wonderful inventions and ideas. Or Xuppu’s jokes. And I- I don’t want to be upset now that Pollen can be with her chosen, and I know we’ll see her again soon, but I do remember thinking that before- before and then I never did see them again.”

“Oh…” It’s less of a word and more of a wheeze, since, God, Adrien can’t even imagine-

“I’m so sorry,” Gigga curls up tighter, all their limbs bundling over them. “I don’t- I do want to go and talk to my old holder, I want to tell him all that I’ve learned, that he can learn too, that we don’t have to be so lonely, but I don’t want to leave. Because what if I do and I don’t come back and I don’t want to leave here and what if it’s gone and never coming back-”

“Hey, hey it’s okay.” Adrien reaches for them, gently bringing them into his chest. Murmuring softly, “It’s alright. I’m not going anywhere. Okay? I’ll be your constant, you can always come back to me. No questions asked.”

“What if I don’t remember-”

“Then I’ll explain the whole thing.” Adrien’s making promises he knows that, one day, he won’t be able to keep. He’s not a kwami. He’s not immortal. One day Gigga won’t have him, but that’s not today. “Or you can get Plagg too. I know he’s a bit of a grouch but he’s a softy at heart.”

“But-”

“And we’re getting the miraculouses back. Or I’ll always keep track of them.” He knows exactly where the bee miraculous is, and though he loves Chloe, he isn’t going to let her just keep it. “And once we get Nooroo back we’ll figure out where the other lost ones are and- and where that box is keeping all the others trapped or maybe I’ll just do, like, a few dozen catastrophes-”

“No!” Gigga jolts at the mention, “Oh, no, you can’t do catastrophe unless it is absolutely dire!”

“What?” That’s a turn in the conversation, a jolt to his own spiral of panic because Adrien’s never actually thought about the ‘after’ of when they get Nooroo. “But it’s a good thing?”

“It’s…” Gigga leans back into his chest. “There is a reason my old holder did not trust destruction. I… I don’t want to tell you, especially since the others have not shared this. It’s upsetting information.”

Adrien takes a shuddering breath- he’s being lied to again- and tries to shut down those thoughts. Gigga isn’t Ladybug. Gigga’s only known him for less than two weeks. He needs to be calm about this. Show that he can be trusted with such information.

“It’s alright,” He whispers, “Whatever it is won’t change my opinion of you.”

“But it might of Plagg’s.”

“Impossible.” The idea of ever even just disliking Plagg… “That’s just not ever possible.”

“I don’t know…”

“Look,” Adrien glances over at the bed, where Plagg’s still asleep. “I know he could kill me. That one day my body might just give out because of holding a miraculous, especially of destruction. I know. I’ve felt it. At least half my nightmares are about it. And even if he doesn’t, fighting against Hawk Moth might. I know that.”

Adrien refuses to think about it, his nightmares do that enough and he is going to enjoy his life now that he has the chance. Everyone has to go at some point. It’s alright, he’s known that since Mother’s disappearance. He’s just happy for the chance to have a life.

Gigga floats away from him, the solid sheen of red from all eight eyes gazing at him. “I can’t tell you much, perhaps Plagg knows more, but I can tell you what I felt in your soul when we transformed along with what Fu said when you released Trixx.”

That’s perhaps slightly concerning. Pollen and Plagg couldn’t tell him anything about Fu’s thoughts on the matter, Adrien isn’t even sure if he wants to listen to them, but they could have both shared this apparent insight on Adrien’s soul.

That’s not fair though. Plagg and Pollen both care deeply about him, he knows that, he isn’t going to doubt it. There might be more to the story, or perhaps they don’t consider it worrying since Adrien hasn’t done a catastrophe in a few months.

But Adrien nods to them to continue.

“When you perform catastrophe you are tearing into the dimension that the miracle box connects to. Previously, there were only two ways to move between this word and that dimension. Either our miraculous has to placed inside the box, trapping us in there until it is taken out and then trapping us here, or a spell of some type has to be performed.”

“Wait-” Adrien knows that Gigga’s getting to the point where catastrophe is a big deal, but he really wants to know this- “A spell?”

“Fu performed it for creation and destruction. It’s actually only theoretical that it could work on the rest of us, since no other kwami has their sheer force of power that can alter universes as they do. Since the spell requires Tikki and Plagg to make a considerable push of their own to get through.”

Adrien lifts his hands so Gigga doesn’t keep rambling on. Since, putting off the other things Gigga said for later, he needs to- the idea that- it was Fu, Fu the bastard, who- he was the one who released Plagg. He’s the one that made it possible for Adrien to ever meet Plagg, to ever burst free from this stupid room and stupid life and meet Nino and Ladybug and Rena and run through Paris and carve out his own space and meet and help so many people late at night and that- that was from the man who tried to take it away too?

Then he takes a deep breath, stamping all of those thoughts as that Fu was not entitled to the ring just because he freed Plagg and how fucking dare he treat Plagg as an object that he can control, and tries to shove those feelings to the back so they can get through this conversation.

A little part of him seethes and wonders if Ladybug got to know this too.

“Okay, I’m good,” He puts his hands down, “So, catastrophe?”

“Right! Yes! So, when you performed catastrophe, you didn’t have either of those established access points, you made your own and…” Gigga’s excitement about knowledge, usually a permanent force despite any situations, tapers off. “And, I didn’t know it until I transformed with you, but it’s not like the spell at all.”

Adrien frowns, “But it seems like it.”

“It does. I’m not sure how the spell works, but it took Fu hours using all of his ‘special items’ to complete it. It also needed Tikki and Plagg themselves to power it on the other side, but since you have access to Plagg’s domain I thought that would fulfill what the spell required. Yet what you didn’t do any of that. You…” Gigga hesitates again, breaking eye contact. “You tore into it.”

Yeah, Adrien knows that. That’s exactly what he was trying to do. He remembers the feeling vividly, especially with Trixx when he had to focus on it, but also with Pollen and then Wayzz. A desperate reach, tearing up the walls and pain pressing down on him. His sheer need clawing through to grab onto their concepts.

“I still don’t understand. I mean, it must have sealed up again I assume with the restoration but-”

“The restoration wouldn’t fix it, the miracle box is self-healing and stable. It would repair once your influence was gone and- and that’s not the point! You tore into it!”

“I know- I-”

“You! Not just Plagg and Tikki or even another kwami! You did!”

“Which is apparently a big deal but I don’t know-”

“No human soul has EVER been able to shift between realms and return! You have no domain!” Gigga’s arms fail around, gesturing to his body. “If at any point your soul leaves your body it doesn’t come back. It moves on, leaves, there’s nothing left in the universe you’re tied to that makes you stay.”

“I…” Adrien tries to think about each time he called catastrophe, more than just the feeling. It’s hard to remember Pollen’s other than feelings. Wayzz happened when he was teetering on unconsciousness. And even with Trixx, being the most aware, the action almost made him pass out. The memory right beforehand blurry. He just remembers the desperation, the reach for deception, for subjection, for protection.

“And that’s left you untethered to your body.” Gigga presses on. “Your flexibility to the miraculous increases, doesn’t it, after you used it? The way you can adapt to different domains, the sheer amount of power that you can draw out and not go insane from, the way you can utilize multiple powers at once. It’s because your soul isn’t tightly embedded into your body anymore. That you’re tethering yourself to destruction, and that allows more of it through. Allows more of our influence to wedge between you and your body.”

Adrien glances down at the his hand, and despite having gotten used to it, it hits how black and different it is. “The scars…?”

“It might be from the effect of it, I don’t know. I don’t know how much more this can go before-” Gigga shakes their head- “There’s a reason why we don’t exist physically, the world rejects us as absolutes. And if, if your soul, Adrien, I don’t know what will happen if you-”

“Hey, hey,” Adrien reaches again, pulling them into a hug, “Hey, it’s okay. It’s okay.”

“Please,” Gigga trembles against him, “Please don’t go.”

Adrien falls back against the couch, holding them tighter. “Hey, it’s alright. I told you I’m not going anywhere, and I meant it. So see, it’s alright… it’s okay.”

Gigga nods, not pulling away and still trembling, and Adrien just holds them. Focuses on their pain rather than think about what this might mean.

And why Pollen and Plagg, both who have transformed with him more, decided to not tell him this.

 

Maybe it was from the conversation with Gigga a few hours earlier, but Adrien finds himself in front of Mother’s statue before school. He’s got about ten minutes before he needs to wake up Plagg and Gigga and get ready and quickly sprint over to Chloe’s to grab Pollen. He was planning on maybe writing out how to tell Nino he’s Chat Noir, but, instead, here he is.

Adrien doesn’t even have anything to say or reasoning, just grazing the peacock brooch as he stares at her statue.

There’re a few formless thoughts trying to break through. Fleeting imagines of Mother meeting Nino. Of the day Hawk Moth’s defeated and the shine in her eyes when he reveals to her that he’s Chat Noir. Going to her when he learned of all that Ladybug kept from him.

“There’s so much I wish you could see.” Adrien sighs, smiles at her. “I could definitely use your advice, but- but I think you’d be proud.”

Probably. If she knew the whole truth, he’s sure that there’s quite a few decisions he’s made that she wouldn’t approve of.

The statue, of course, doesn’t have a response, but Adrien stands there long enough in silence that he can hear Nathalie approach. It’s a bit of a rattle to his insides, the strange echo-y numbness fading into confusion since he still has plenty of time by now.

“Adrien?”

“Yes Nathalie?” He half-turns, smiling. “I’m about to get ready I just wanted to talk to her for a moment.”

She nods, gaze lowering. “I understand. I simply wished to tell you it won’t be necessary, you’ll be leaving in fifteen minutes to do a photoshoot in Chartes.”

“What? Chartes?” Adrien frowns, deeply, since while it’s only about an hour from Paris that’s still too far away if anything happens. “That seems… not my normal work. Can’t another model fill in?”

“Well, for starters you are the replacement, and it can’t be rescheduled. It’s for preparation for Hero’s Day next week. Makeup will happen there.”

It should be fine. Really. The other heroes handled Maledikator without him, surely, if an akuma does happen, it’ll be okay. Especially if it gets really bad Chloe could show up as a surprise. Since he doesn’t have time to pick Pollen up right now. Besides, Hawk Moth’s been pushing really hard recently. This is usually when he’s pushed his limits and needs to take a break.

“Alright, let me get my homework at least.” He smiles and walks off, letting it fall pretty rapidly as he texts the group chat about his absence. And letting some of the ring’s powers seep in the phone so he can text Pollen. With strict instructions that Chloe can only transform if it Hawk Moth is about to win or someone about to die. He doesn’t want to try and handle another Style Queen situation afterwards.

This is simply another thing to get through. Adrien can do this. Just one more thing.

And maybe during this drive and photoshoot, he can figure out some way to talk to Plagg too.

 

The photoshoot is long, all the longer for how his guts ache within him. 

Adrien does everything he can to make it go faster, but once the pain really sets in from it, they have to stop. It gives him a longer lunch though, over two hours, and Adrien’s going to use that to his advantage to maybe quickly get back to Paris. To get the bee miraculous back from Chloe and to tell Nino that he has something to tell him. Not that Adrien’s going to do that during lunch, but if Nino at least knows then that’s just extra incentive to just go for it.

Plus, when Adrien transforms, it takes away the stomach pain. He isn’t sure why it’s there, he hasn’t actually gotten sick from a virus or bacteria since wearing the ring. But a lingering pulsing ache in throughout his middle of his stomach isn’t normal for the miraculous to cause, so it’s gotta be something normal.

It’s also a really fun way to just mess with his powers again. No akuma or anything like that. Just using the baton as a giant catapult that works a little too well when he flails around in the air going faster than the speeding cars.

Not that he can be hurt like this with his baton, extending it and sliding down.

Gigga’s particularly fascinated by that, though Adrien’s not sure if the physics are real or if they’re being affected by his transformation.

And he can only imagine what the internet will be like when a picture- after pushing through a headache to shift his transformation to give him roller skates- of him holding onto the back of a car is posted.

Now that was really fun. Adrien personally has never played a skating video game before, he thinks Kim might have, but zooming through the freeway like that made him smile and laugh.

But, still, he was going fast on purpose. He needs to get to the school, to Chloe.

“Hey!” He runs up to Marinette with a wave as she leaves the school, he got here right as lunch started, great. “Lunch just start then?”

“Oh!” She jumps, hands a whirlwind of movement. “No! Well, it is still going on if you’re looking for Nino or something or anyone really or the teachers since, you know, you weren’t here the entire morning and-”

Adrien smiles at her, “So… how long has it been? I’m sorry, I don’t have my phone.”

He left all of that back there, including the bracelet since he texted Max to switch it to be accurate again, but he’ll back before anyone notices he’s gone. He just needs to talk to Chloe.

“Right! Yes! And also don’t worry about it, I surely forget it everywhere. Mine! Not yours, obviously. But, uh… about ten minutes? Maybe?” Marinette then jolts and whips her phone out to check. “Yeah, it’s been only twelve minutes.”

Adrien nods, he made good time traveling then, but he only has about fifteen minutes before he needs to start heading back. And it would be nice to grab something to eat.

“Thanks Marinette!” He waves and starts running along the sidewalk. “See you tomorrow!”

Slipping into an alley as Adrien and coming out the top as Chat Noir, Adrien starts jumping around towards Chloe’s. She doesn’t eat at school unless she has to, so depending on traffic she should be arriving at any moment, and maybe he can ask her to get him some food too.

He barely lands on the deck before she’s opening the door, giving him a smile though still rather tense. “I don’t suppose you have another emergency so I can keep Pollen longer.”

“Afraid not.” He gives a shrug, smiling wider as Pollen zooms out and hugs him. She’s incredibly faint, barely visible, and Adrien nuzzles her a little before she floats back. “Though I can promise to come around with her again soon.”

“Well perhaps I can bribe some more time right now.” Chloe smirks at him, “Is the stray kitty cat hungry?”

Adrien smirks back, it’s a bit of a dig but he’s too hungry to care and he’d rather eat transformed in case his guts are still uncomfortable. “Oh, I am always hungry.”

Chloe grins and nods, pleased that this is going her way, and Adrien bounds in and beelines to the food. He didn’t have enough for breakfast as normal, and the stomachache turned him away from his snacks, and he just spent the last hour pushing his transformation for speed which he needs to do again in less than twenty minutes. So food. Food now.

“The whole city will be shocked to know that Chat Noir is actually more of a pig than anything else.”

“The pig kwami is probably less of a glut than Plagg is.” Adrien covers his mouth when he speaks, throat stretching as he takes too big a swallow. And then stuffs some of the rolls in his mouth. Bread’s always good at making him feel full fast.

The meal is slightly ruined for how Chloe’s phone begins to buzz and buzz and buzz some more, interrupting as they make small talk mostly revolving around Pollen. She eventually snaps and opens it and-

Chloe looks up at him, lips pinched and eyes wide. “You’ve just been shown getting cataclysmed.”

“What?” Adrien stands and moves around to look at her phone. “That’s not possible, I’m right…”

He trails off as she plays the video again. It’s incredibly realistic copies of him and Ladybug. They’re fighting tooth and nail over the city- it’s fake for how little destruction there is around him, he’s got a pretty bad handle on his powers right now once he gets emotional- eventually with it ending in a park where he just… fades into black dust.

“Okay, well, that’s obviously not real.” Adrien spins his ring. “I’m right here.”

“But Hawk Moth wants everyone to think it’s real. And the internet’s going crazy right now, so-” Chloe makes a shooing motion at him- “Go and show face and prove it’s false before the whole world…”

She trails off as they both turn towards the outside, gasping before rushing out to the balcony. Hazy red ash descending over buildings and the streets. And, when one gets close to them, Adrien takes the red akuma and destroys it within his fist.

“Well,” Adrien huffs, “How would you like to keep Pollen for a little longer?”

Chloe nods, “Pollen! Buzz on!”

The transformation, as it did the first time, simply welcomes Chloe into the swarm of golden light. She doesn’t fight it, she doesn’t look bothered by it at all, relishing and moving with the dazzling light coming from her. Which he’s very glad for. Chloe’s limits are about to get pushed to the max for this being only her second time fighting and using the miraculous.

“Grab some of that food so you can detransform and eat during this.” He grabs his baton, clenching his jaw as he starts to see the red themed akumas emerge. “Your priority is to not engage with akumas or break the objects. Just freeze any manipulation type you come across, okay?”

“You can count on me!”

He nods and shoots off. Wishing that he could be stealthy and be more effective, but he needs to be seen. So that whatever emotions Hawk Moth is preying on right now begin to fade.

But it sucks, fighting, since he can’t use cataclysm. Actively calling any destruction, anything more than just the transformation, it gets more out of hand every time. And without precision, he can’t risk calling it when there’s too big a risk to hurting the akuma victim or others in the surrounding areas.

Still, despite the numbers, he’s faster and a better fighter than all of them. Plus, Hawk Moth’s recycling akumas. He knows their weakness, he can pit them together, knows how to dodge, and, most importantly, knows where their akumas are.

The butterflies simply go back up to join the other mass of them in the sky, there’s nothing he can do about that now. Not when he’s desperately trying to get the confused citizens inside.

Kicking into a backflip to dodge after Gigga’s yell, Adrien rebounds off one hand so he can grab the little earpiece from his baton. Shoving it roughly into his head before swinging his baton as a bat, whatever the heck the Mime sent at him exploding in some soccer manioc. Which destroys their akuma, and the citizen immediately blots towards the nearest building.

“Who’s on comms?” Adrien shouts, scowling as rolls away from Animan transforming into some elephant right above him.

“I’m here!” Chloe calls brightly despite the ragged breathing. “I got Dark Cupid down! And that nasty knight man.”

“Chloe?” Rena huffs, grunting- “What the fuck?”

That’s two venoms. Carapace managed to produce two heavy duty shellters when first transformed, and he remembers that taking a lot out of Nino especially with the lighter third. Chloe might be able to pull two more out if absolutely necessary, but she’s going to have to destransform soon.

“Only use venom again if you see Simon Says, Princess Fragrance, or Maledikator, I’ll-” Adrien starts to go up, only from some mud akuma to grab his leg and sling him to the ground. He oofs, Gigga yelling- “Roll right! Manhole underneath you!”- and he quickly follows their instructions. Plucking just a string of destruction out of the ring to get rid of the cover. It takes out more than that, but thankfully contained and he can lose all akumas down here.

“We need to meet up.” Ladybug cuts in, panting as well. “I’m rather sure they’re trying to stop that from happening. But-”

“Get underground then, it’ll be harder for them to control the situation.” Adrien quickly thinks about where most of these akumas would be ineffective. “We can meet in the Seine. There’s very few water akumas.”

“That’s the plan then!” Ladybug huffs, her yoyo zipping. “I’ll track down Carapace and get him, everyone else into the water and meet up with Chat.”

Adrien starts running there, praising all the kwamis that his hideout is a little on the way. He still has the rocks charged from Pollen, and he needs to grab more food and medicine and water. Especially for Chloe, Nino, and Rena. Ladybug should know enough about her transformation to push through, but the new heroes won’t be able to do that. And they can’t be taught during this stress.

He also, after shoving everything into his baton and running towards the Seine, starts carving Gigga’s rune onto part of his baton. If he needs stupefy then he’ll have to bleed a bit for it, but it can be used as a last-ditch effort to get them out of pinch.

“Adrien-” Gigga flies beside him, so many big eyes rounded at him- “Do you know what happened to Nooroo?”

This isn’t the time for such questions, they have to survive Nooroo and Hawk Moth first and answering means he has to turn off his comm, but Adrien just can’t not do that with how their voice shakes. He can only imagine that Nooroo has never been used like this.

He’s going to make Hawk Moth pay one day.

“He’s trying to contain his powers.” That what the miraculouses are for, to contain the insanity that would come from an absolute abstract concept becoming physical. “He’s trying to keep us safe as best he can.”

“But will he break from this?”

That, Adrien doesn’t understand. Kwamis can’t be broken. Not as long as their concept remains.

He isn’t telling that to Gigga.

“Only destruction breaks things.” Adrien tries to smile at them, tries through his heavy, deep breaths. “Plagg and I would never do that to any of you.”

Gigga doesn’t smile back, but they do nod, and Adrien will take that. Turning his comms back on as he puts the baton to his mouth and jumps into the water.

He meets up with Rena first, who’s only breathing every few moments as she’s trying to look at her flute.

“You need to keep your air.”

Rena puts it back up, stares with wide eyes at him. “Hawk Moth’s out though. He’s on the tower.”

“What?” That comes from Chloe, “That despicable man finally showed face! I’m gonna-!”

“Easy now,” Ladybug puffs out, a splash coming soon after. “We are going to get to do anything if we don’t plan this out.”

“This is what I found out.” Rena starts as they begin to swim, Adrien opening himself up to his baton to get Ladybug and Carapace’s location. Chloe still isn’t in the water, though she’s close, and he’s going to start snapping if she doesn’t jump in within the next minute.

“He’s red themed like all the other akumas, implying he’s under an effect that’s causing this. Then he has the mask up on him despite no other akuma having that, as I’ve seen so far, so he must be straining a lot, mentally. It’s likely the reason why he has to be in closer proximity.”

“Chloe!” Adrien barks, less than a minute, but she can’t just- “Get in the damn water!”

“I’m doing fine- I’ve already got a few more broke-”

“I swear on Pollen if you don’t-” There’s a splash- “Thank you. Now, we’re all here?”

“Yeah, and hey,” Carapace swims up to them, dragging Ladybug behind him. “I’m actually fast in the water.”

Rena snorts with a grin, “You’re a turtle, imagine that.”

“Cut the chatter,” Ladybug settles upright, watching as Chloe swims up to them. “We gotta figure out a plan to get to the tower.”

Adrien takes a deep breath in as Ladybug begins to think, she doesn’t like a lot of noise right now and as much as he wants to tell her off or come up with his own plan, Paris needs her to create her very best plan.

And they’re going to need Chloe for that.

“You’ve gotta take a break right now,” He swims up to her and takes out a granola bar. “You can breathe with my baton.”

Chloe huffs but takes it. “You’re lucky I’m absolutely starving and I can’t send you a dry cleaner’s bill. Buzz off.”

She detransforms and her clothes do get instantly soaked. She’s technically can’t charge him, nor would she if she could. Most importantly, it gives Pollen a chance to reassure her too rather than just him.

“My King!” Pollen shouts, though the sound is a whisper with how he can barely even see her outline, and hugs him as well. “Please take care.”

He gives her a smile, lifts up his ringed hand and shakes his head. Unless absolutely necessary, he won’t be using cataclysm. Which should have been something he told Ladybug, but she should know that his powers have been on the fritz since last Friday. Only getting worse, really.

“I see how it is.” Chloe’s voice slurs through the baton, and her words a contradiction with how tightly closed her eyes are. “He’s your favorite.”

Pollen seems like she may giggle, not even Adrien’s ears can clearly pick up anything, and they both turn once Ladybug pounds her fist.

“We need to get as close to the tower as we can. Hawk Moth knows he’s the objective, and he’s aware that we have the power of an illusion.”

Rena lifts her flute. “Just tell me where you want our decoys.”

“We won’t be using a decoy at all. He’ll be expecting that. We’ll just go.”

Carapace frowns, “Until he totally sees that we’re real!”

“He won’t see anything.” Ladybug grins, winking at Rena.

Rena frowns, “That’s going to be harder, I’ll have to put all my focus on it.”

“Buzz on!” Chloe’s transformation swarms back over her, and she hands the baton back to him. “Excuse me, but I don’t think we can avoid touching all those akumas around him.”

“That’s why we’re going up.” Ladybug points at his baton, which is very amazingly providing his first breath of air. “There’s not as many akumas, and we’ll tip over on him. Once we’re there, Carapace traps us in with him. There might be one or two akumas with him, but Chloe’s focus will be on freezing Hawk Moth while we make openings for her.”

“That’s a lot of akumas trying to break in.” Carapace frowns, “I’m not sure if I can fight at the same time.”

“Just maintain the shellter then. We can take care of the rest, and it’s not like Hawk Moth has been doing any fighting this entire time. Once you get that shellter up, it won’t take long.”

Ladybug glances at him as she says it. He wonders why, he tells himself he doesn’t know as angry words prickle on the inside of his throat. That even without his powers, he’s a great fighter and he’ll be able to take them down.

But, well, he does have the power to dissolve his arm into a deadly wave of pure destruction. Just one touch to Hawk Moth will be enough to take care of him.

And Ladybug knows that. After all, that’s what he tried to do to her last week.

Still, it’s a good plan, and they all nod before swimming off to get a little closer. Once they pause, Rena starting her mirage that gives them duplicates that keep swimming- the Ladybug one even gesturing a bit as she talks- Adrien sets up his baton. Embeds it as best he can and gives a nod when it’s ready. Carapace holding onto Rena and then the pole, Ladybug and Queen Bee beside each other as he’s below them all.

Rena winks down to him, and it’s up they all go.

Adrien glances up only once as they ascend, clenching his jaw against the sight of Nino clutching onto the pole and Rena. He must hate heights and Adrien didn’t even think about it. With the suit, he won’t get that hurt if they fall, but still, Adrien should have known better. And he can’t even try to comfort him right now.

Adrien sends the biggest mental apologize he can to him as they get high enough, beginning to tilt the baton towards the tower. Where their little demon moth is.

The tip starts slow, rapidly gaining speed, and they all get ready to jump right before a huge gust of wind takes them to the side. Rena gasping, the illusion must be falling apart then, as they begin to fall. Carapace straining to stay with the baton, but Queen Bee and Ladybug lost. Their weapons flinging down towards a lamppost to help them.

Which is good, but it separates them. And, Adrien looks for one second, one second that must drag through all of eternity, that’s not a good thing with all the swarming akumas racing to them. No plan. Separated.

“Shit!” Rena backhands some new akuma, who literally bounces against the ground like some rubber ball. “How’d he know- how’d he do that-”

“Not important!” Adrien snaps, seeing Simon Says and takes his baton and instantly sends it into his chest. It doesn’t break the akumatization, tragically, but he had enough sheer hatred and willpower to send him through a building. A block away.

Gigga replies though, “Nooroo has the ability to sense emotions, perhaps Hawk Moth can utilize that?”

Adrien grunts, seeing objects and fists and dodging as best he can. It’s Nino at his back, and Adrien just lets instincts take over. Lashing out and retreating back for Nino to take the hits or shield from the hits at him. It won’t last forever though, despite the constant energy numbing everything else and pumps sheer life through his limbs.

But Nino’s breathing is getting ragged. There’s too many akumas.

Gigga keeps shouting, instructions that Adrien takes and works with. But Gigga can’t see everything and some akuma throws something that hits his leg.

It hurts, sticky and burning on his leg, and with a shout he rolls to the ground. The thing gone now, along with a massive chuck of the ground- cracks in the surface branching out- and Adrien forces himself up and pushing and fighting. Trying to find some gap to let them escape-

“AHGHGH!”

Rena screams out, and Adrien can’t look immediately. He’s clashing with the Mime, all his senses diligent to any attackers around him and eyes peeled as to what the next object could be.

“Chloe!” Ladybug cries, “Venom Rena!”

“But-”

“NOW!”

“Venom!”

“Shellter!”

Adrien still can’t look, crashing into a wall. So he slams his foot down, summoning just a thread of his powers, and the ground grumbles and cracks. The Mime makes a noise of surprise, other akumas losing their footing as well, and the wall comes down. Adrien reaching and destroying the hat.

Mylene’s father is panicked and shocked, which is terrible, but Adrien just makes a half-shooing gesture with one hand before finally glancing over.

Rena and Ladybug are in the shellter, Ladybug’s hands glowing over the still fox hero. Where, despite how the blood stopped flowing after Chloe’s venom, enough still got out to get her white stomach all red.

Adrien blinks, and he sees a flash of Nino falling from broadcast tower all over again. Akumas, driven to a level of hate that they would be appalled to see come from their body, killing. Killing all because of Hawk Moth. All so that man, who’s already abusing Nooroo, can get more power and change the world.

This beautiful wonderful world. Adrien loves this world. He loves his life and his boyfriend and the people in it and his city. And yes, they cause him so much pain that seems like it will never stop hurting but it is his. His to change and fight for and rejoice. No one and nothing is taking that away from him.

Not Ladybug.

Not Father.

Not Hawk Moth.

“CATACLYSM!”

His entire arm bursts into the black storm, crackling with gold and green. The ground cracks tilting down under him and the next breath of air is a little weak but that doesn’t matter.

These akumas are going away.

“Go after Hawk Moth!” He yells it at Queen Bee and Carapace, wheezing as he tries to breathe. Sending his powers over the akumas, destroying the magic, the object. He can feel their souls, bursting with emotions funneled by Nooroo’s powers. And if he doesn’t immediately sense the object to break, he just wipes out those emotions. Severing the link between the soul and the akuma.

He’s been doing it all this time for akuma victims, and now that he encase them with his entire arm, this is just easier.

Or simply faster. It’s getting much more difficult to breath and his eyes are aching at this pressure pushing at them from behind. His arm, everything shoulder down that’s been turned into the wave, hurts in a way that he can’t completely ignore. His entire body, actually, even with the transformation, teeters on the edge of collapse.

It’s hard to push through that. He knows he must, with Rena and Ladybug down, but it’s difficult to keep that determination. Like it’s going numb

He has to move though. Not from the akumas, but the ground is cracking and rumbling and dissolving. The trees and grass around him have all since died. The resulting people saved from the akumas wheezing and tripping as they try and run from this.

But- but it’s okay- there’s not that many akumas left. He can hold out. It’s… it’s getting a lot harder to breathe, harder to focus, especially now that his chest begins to hurt as the black wave starts to move inward from his shoulder.

But he’s almost done.

Adrien shoots it out towards the zombies, Zombizou in the crowd he thinks, and morphs it into a wave that swallows up the army. The black wave foaming and streaked with more gold than green now.

Adrien takes a chance look at the shellter with Rena, Ladybug’s helping her up, thank god, and now-

“Aren’t you tired of fighting constantly for a love you can’t have?”

Adrien blinks, the exhaustion of it all welling back up inside him, and he draws the wave towards himself. Slowly, not wanting to expend more strength to keep it up.

It crackles. Green and red as he pulls it in and why am I the one fighting so hard? Why do I have to be the one that breaks for everyone else?

“I understand…” An ache, a longing, since they both have to put up with this, and it should be different- “I only wish to have that love.”

Adrien blinks, crying now. And for a moment he sees the world, the akumas, Ladybug and Rena running after him, and I have to keep fighting right now. Before it ends. But it’s ending anyway. Despite how I fight endlessly.

“Then let me help you turn the fight.” The voice whispers, “One of us should have our love.”

That’s not fair, both of us should have love. Everyone should. No deserves to have to break for love. No one should have to beg for it. It’s should just be. I just… I just want to be loved without this pain.

“Chat Noir!”

“I can do that for you.”

Please, yes, please, and I’ll fight for you too. So you can have your love and then everyone can have their love and we can all be happy.

“Thank you,” There’s a foreign relief and hope coming through, and it feels good, knowing that this longing will end for both of us. “I give you the power of sincerity. With one touch, you’ll destroy all the fears and anxiety and rules keeping people apart. You won’t have to fight anymore, it’ll just be.”

Yes, thank you.

Then it all goes black with a roar.

Chapter 18: Hero's Night

Notes:

So un'betaed, apologies for any mistakes.

Enjoy!

It’s dark.

That’s all there is, just darkness. Not like with Style Queen. That was also cold, a stasis of some sort, though I suppose I never really realized that until this. This endless expansion everywhere, none of it going anywhere. It’s not a cage, but since it doesn’t go anywhere, it feels wrong to call it freedom either.

I wonder if I’ll lose my memories of this sensation too. I know that remembering Style Queen hurt, trying to figure out what happened as a statue. I didn’t have a working brain, not when it was all turned to gold, but still there, alive within. Here, here I remember.

I can remember a lot here, actually. And perhaps, perhaps I can make it a little less dark…

The memory forms in the darkness, golden and bright, and Mother’s smiling face shines down at me. Everything is blurry outside of her, and she’s crying. She’s crying and laughing and then there’s Father, face softer and relieved.

“Our little miracle,” Mother reaches to me, it takes all of my little hand to wrap around her one fingers. “Oh, just look at him Gabriel, isn’t he just perfect?”

Mother begins to cry again, holding me closer to her chest, and I can feel a hand, big for all how small my head is, cup my skull.

“Absolutely perfect, our son. Our miracle.”

The memory fades back into the darkness, though I remember the rest of it. It’s strange, having all of my memories and experiences vividly inside me. All the sensations and emotions lying there within.

Perhaps, with all this extensive darkness, I can release them all at once, see them all, relish in all the good memories of my life. Perhaps leave out the most painful.

Though, watching the golden memory of meeting Nino, meeting Plagg, meeting Ladybug, all happening so close together, don’t exist without the pain. Of the later memories of guilt and theft and betrayal. Of seeing their smiles overlapped with their yelling and fighting and stress.

I need to get out of here, I don’t want those memories to stay like that. That when I play this out again I’ll have resolutions, peace and acceptance. I don’t want it to end like this.

Yet there’s only the darkness, yawning out everywhere.

There is something else, within me. It seems welcoming and foreign all at once. If I went inside, does it open up someplace else? Away from this darkness and perhaps out. No, not out, this is inward. I don’t know what it is, but going in means I can’t go out. I know that.

I want my body, that’s not further within my soul. It’s outside of it. But where is it? I don’t feel stuck like with Style Queen. I don’t feel clashing with me as an akuma’s powers try to take it from me. It’s just not there.

Am I dead?

Nope. Not following that thought. Not dead. Plagg wouldn’t let me.

Though I was about to be akumatized, I never realized how hard it is to fight empathy. It’s hard to resist, falling into that warmth and reassurance that someone else does know and they want to help soothe it. That I’m not alone. I know that once let in Hawk Moth amplify those emotions and manipulate them until I can’t act rationally anymore. I know that, but it certainly didn’t feel like it in the moment. That it was hopeless to try on my own.

Man, I really need to talk to people. That was the whole point of going to school, why haven’t I done that yet? I wanted to let people in, to know them and have them know me, finally, but then once I have that I just told myself it was stupid and risky. Like it wasn’t worth it to try and simply continue being alone.

Or maybe I’m just tired. People take so much energy.

And there’s Plagg and Pollen and Gigga. I have them. That’s nice. I don’t know what I’d do without them. They don’t seem to take so much energy.

Especially since Plagg must have done something about the akumatization. Pollen might not have been able to help when Maledikator was influencing me, but there’s already destruction in my soul. Plagg could have done something.

There’s destruction in my soul. Now there’s an idea.

It’s easy to find once I look for it. Dormant and peaceful, the potential to end what is. Everything that was before fallen prey to it already. Pure darkness and stillness that is, ultimately, absolute peace.

But I’m not dying yet.

Drawing it through me, I push with it outwards. Into the darkness with it. Destruction to destroy destruction. Hopefully it doesn’t hurt Plagg. I just want out, back out into the world, I want to do something. I want my life, I want to live it, and I refuse to let it go.

Eventually, perhaps a second or perhaps an eternity of poking out with it, there’s a tear, and I rush out.

The world opens up. It is not sight and sound and sensation, this isn’t my body, but there is outside knowledge. People-shaped golden light. They’re all too bright to look at, impossible to see any fine details without it aching. Which, hmm, is it possible for a soul to hurt?

I won’t tell Ladybug about that one then.

And ah, there she is. Also impossible to look at, but there’s no denying that it’s her. Her light shines with impossible colors and galaxies not yet formed. Creation flowing through her and out to the world.

And there’s Rena-

“Kit?”

Oh, hey, Plagg. Are you still transformed with me? I can’t feel my body. Which, uh, dislike that.

“You can’t be out right now!”

Like hell I want to be trapped in that endless darkness again with nothing to do. The goal is the same, I have to get into my body again. I have to do, I have to-

“You can’t! Not like- ugh, you’ll die leaking out like this! Just- just hang on, I’ll- I’ll do something-”

Focusing back at Plagg, destruction everywhere and everywhere and too immense for it to all make sense. Everything that was and everything that won’t be. It’s all too much. Maybe if I go deeper inside-

“Kit, my stars, you need to reject destruction! Before I can’t hold it together and you- before your soul fades! Before you’re just gone!”

No, no absolutely not am I letting this go. My body is MINE. It is meant to house my soul, and it is mine to do with it. We’ve already been over this, I chose destruction. I chose this, I chose Plagg. This is my life, everyone I love and cherish here, and my body is just going to have to deal.

“That’s not- Kit, you don’t understand! Nothing withstands destruction! You need to start push me out, if we time it right with Ladybug right there, you’ll- you’ll be as good as new.”

Hm, yeah, sheer willpower probably doesn’t make that much of an influence compared to absolute concept of pure destruction. But I can’t reject this, not completely.

“Well suck it up Kit, I’m not letting you die.”

And I’m not living my life without you!

“Do you think we have another choice?”

There’s always a choice. There’s no rules, there’s nothing that binds us to a single course, a single path. I’m so sick and tired of having my life carefully set up so there’s only one action I can take, only one outcome. Chained to one possibility, one way to fight akumas, one way to live, one way to leave my mark. That’s not me. Not anymore.

“Kit-”

I understand that I can’t destroy the walls keeping me from other paths. That right now this is the only one that exists. Well, that or death, but that’s not an option either.

“Finally, could have done without the speech. Now, give me a moment to try and-”

No, that’s not acceptable either.

“You chose now of all times to be stubborn? Fuck, Kit, just-”

I turn my attention towards creation. I need another path. Another option. I refuse to die like this. I refuse to accept that there’s only one path I can take. I’ll make my own.

“No, no no no no Kit! Kit you can’t do that! NO!”

I reach out, it aches. It aches and aches and I can feel how delicate it is. That whatever a soul is, it can’t exist like this, some unknown force pushing at me on all sides. Trying to get me to collapse inwards. I can’t go in though. Out, I need to go out.

“No! Kit! STOP!”

Plagg thrashes, destruction swarming up and collapsing down. A black hole trembling. It must be painful, wanting to reaching out but knowing that to touch anything is to absorb and crush it.

I’m going to fix it. I just need a little bit of creation… I’ll make something new…

“No! A soul can’t take creation and destruction at once! STOP! You’ll tear yourself apart! NO! KIT! PLEASE!”

I reach. I refuse to collapse, not when Plagg sounds like that.

Creation rushes through at a simple graze. There is no peace with creation. It is life bursting and exploding and shining and spinning and flight and burrowing and collisions and fire and pull and pushes and everything everywhere moving all the time. All at once, at every instance, everything that is and will be.

“NO!”

It rushes in, and I jerk back. It’s- memories overlaying and everything I’ve done collapses and swirls- I have to get back to Plagg, then Nino and everyone- I can’t- what’s

There’s another presence, an awareness of me that doesn’t make sense, that holds everything together for a moment before the presence begins to fade. The destruction keeping it from drowning me again and the creation keeping it from falling apart as I coil back up again.

“Kit… I’m sorry, but you have to let go of it. Please, Kit, you can’t-”

The miraculous powers have always been shaped by willpower, by the force of how my soul pushes and how my body withstands the shaping of such powers. I want my body, a body that can fully withstand destruction, because I’m not giving anything up.

“What? Kit, no, that’s- you’ve already suffered too much damage even with Tikki helping. Reality will fight against your existence-”

This is my life. I’ll fight harder for it.

“No, Kit, you can’t just- kit? KIT!”

And everything goes white.

 

“Kit! Come on you stubborn little-”

“Easy Plagg, he’s still forming.”

“He’s not dead. His soul is still there, but he’s much less experienced with handling creation than destruction. Not that anyone’s ever done this before. Completely unprecedented!”

“Which is exactly why we should have said something! But no! You thought we needed to have better control of the conversation!”

“When in human history has a conversation calling out the state of a soul ever resulted in a calm discussion when blindsided like that?”

“I don’t know! But my kit is tough, he could have taken it!”

“That doesn’t mean he should have had to! Not when there was so much going on!”

“Well now we can’t tell me at all! Now he might not ever wake up at all!”

“No- don’t talk like that! He’ll- he’ll wake up! He said he wouldn’t leave!”

“The situation is unprecedented, but I believe Adrien’s strength will win. It is only a matter of time.”

“I swear to all the stars, if my kit…”

 

Inhales.

Exhales.

Repeats.

Adrien focuses on that. The sensation. Grounded in reality. The movement of air, his muscles flexing and relaxing, his heart pulsing. He isn’t doing any of it, just feeling it.

He is alive. Physically.

And being alive is so very tiring.

 

“I thought you said-”

“He is waking! It’s taking a moment for his mind to surface, that’s all.

“I should feel it-”

“It’s not your domain. Trust me, Adrien is gaining control of his body. It’s his again.”

“Does that mean he’ll wake up? He’s coming back?”

“I-”

Adrien groans, fire crackers of pain snapping along his bones. If his body could talk, he could only imagine the angry complaints it would be clamoring at him.

But he needs to move, the kwamis sound very worried.

“KIT!” There’re two bright green dots in his face, surrounded by black, when Adrien cracks an eye open. “Oh thank all reality, I swear you ever do something that STUPID again-”

“Be easy on him!” Pollen pushes Plagg out of the way, smiles at him a little further back. “Hello my King, how are you feeling?”

“Bloated and achy.” A little bit of an underestimation of the pain, but it is fading into something more muted at least. “What happened?”

Gigga floats up into sight now too. “What do you remember?”

“The red akumas…” Adrien shivers on impulse, there were so many and… “One of them got to Rena.”

He remembers exploding at that, bursting apart. Barely guiding destruction out as he unleashed it out onto the akumas and Paris. The ground and everywhere breaking apart under the force. People barely able to flee. He hopes he didn’t do anything to them. He remembers trying to keep it from them, but he couldn’t… he wasn’t holding it together-

“A butterfly got to me.” Adrien frowns, because he doesn’t remember… “How’d that even happen?”

“Your soul was exposed with how you used your powers.” Gigga explains, “A butterfly only had to touch your soul to make the connection.”

Plagg growls, and that… Adrien can sense the power from the ring getting agitated. His finger vibrating. That’s new.

Pollen pats Plagg’s side. “And after that?”

“Plagg took over? I didn’t have my body. I was trying to find it.” He remembers that. Trying to find his body again, pushing out and out until he could-

“Yeah,” Plagg snorts, “I can’t believe you thought you had one left.”

Adrien blinks, inhales and exhales.

“I’m sorry. What?”

Plagg looks down with a shrug, “I’m pure destruction, Kit, the moment I took over that was it. Bye bye body.”

“But I wasn’t dead!”

“You were, physically.” Gigga states, “You just didn’t move on.”

“I was trying to keep your soul in the miraculous temporarily. Then Ladybug would put out a restoration once you detangled from destruction, and then boom! New body.”

Adrien frowns, because he dimly remembers that. “I had to completely reject the miraculous though.”

“Yeah, but, like, you didn’t have a body. And that would have been a guaranteed way to get one.”

Adrien sits up, groaning all the while, and the kwamis fly to his back to help push him up. Which is new, them being so… physical. They always could on him, but not with much force.

“You all… exist more now?”

“Pollen and I moreso with you.” Gigga frowns over at his books and, oh, he’s in his hideout. “Nothing else. Plagg has a bit more physicality.”

Adrien looks down at his hands. They seem normal enough. And the most important thing is that they work and his new body isn’t, like, a cat or something.

“Okay, moving on-”

“Moving on?” Plagg screeches, “Kit! Your body is literally-”

Pollen smacks the back of his head. “It’s most important that you rest right now, my King.”

“It’s been… awhile, hasn’t it?” Even with a new body, Adrien apparently can’t escape the anxiety that is the passing of time. “My Father, school, Nino, I need to contact someone.”

“Okay,” Pollen nods, “That is a problem, but a few more hours of rest won’t really change anything.”

Adrien squints at her, and then looks at Gigga. “How long has it been?”

“My King, it really hasn’t been-”

“Kit, geez, just be concerned with yourself for once and-”

“It’s been about four days since the akuma fight.”

“Thank you Gigga,” Adrien lifts an eyebrow to both Pollen and Plagg, who both stubbornly look back at him despite the fact that it’s been four days. Father must be out of his mind- “So, with that, I think I do need to get up.”

Plagg glares at Pollen, who wilts a little as she nods, and turns back to him. “Kit, you need to understand the severity of the situation.”

“I mean, I have my body again? Right? Sure, it took a moment for things to sync up again-”

All the kwamis dim a little, Pollen’s antenna trembling at him. “Adrien, please do not speak light of what had happened. You nearly didn’t… sync up, as you say.”

Ah. Okay, well, his stomach is working again if the tense lump that just formed in there is any indication. But he is good now, and he needs to get back. He has to. Father, Nino, all of them. He can’t just be here any longer.

“Kit, I can’t tell you what exactly happened, Tikki is probably the only one that really knows, but you made your new body. Which,” Plagg shrugs, glances away, “Considering your soul is attuned with destruction, not creation, it’s not… right.”

Adrien looks to Pollen.

“What Plagg means is that your body is in a unique state. When you created it, you didn’t have any set rules or plans on it. You just simply willed it into being from what you took from Tikki. However, since you align with destruction, your body’s creation followed none of the constraints that the created universe operates on. Breaking the normal rules with the formation.”

Adrien looks to Gigga.

“Your body is not physically possible. It’s operating based on rules you gave it, not on the rules of the universe. Which we don’t know what’s going to happen. Like,” Gigga shrugs, “You haven’t consumed anything in the last week, but you’re still quite healthy. Bodily, that is.”

Oh, yeah, Adrien can see the problem.

He can certainly feel it, as a dim layer of shock settles over him.

“Since you’re not wearing Tikki’s miraculous, nor are you experienced in creation, we can’t predict what’s going to happen. What rules are broken and what are not.” Pollen explains.

Adrien rubs his temples. Trying to focus on the sensation as everything else gets all tingly and numb.

“It’s like you’re in the cheese aging process. Left alone in the dark to develop!” Plagg blurts, “Though I’m sure you’ll turn out exquisite.”

Adrien tries taking a deep breath. It doesn’t help.

“I do not know what will happen,” Gigga tries to smile, it doesn’t work well with the fangs and too many eyes, but he appreciates it nevertheless. “But it is what you willed it, so it likely won’t be against you or your goals.”

“Yeah!” Plagg nods rapidly, “You specifically wanted a body that could withstand destruction. I don’t really think that’s totally possible, but it’s a lot better at it than your last one!”

“It is?”

“It is?” Pollen echoes.

“It’s the whole reason why Adrien wasn’t eating, did you not realize that?” Plagg huffs, “This body can take in powers from the miraculous without rejecting it so much. Or, well, it kinda just shifts with the powers. Tikki would know more on how it works.”

“Okay,” Adrien takes a deep breath, “So my body’s pretty much the same, just that I wanted to use the miraculous better? And it took a moment for everything to work back together?”

“That’s fairly accurate,” Pollen nods, “There is still a very distinct chance that there will be more to it, but yes.”

“Great!” Adrien gets up, stiff but already much better than before, and rummages through his supplies for water and emergency bars and shoves it into his face. Because even if he didn’t need to, it certainly still feels like a need. “Now, we need to come up with some reason that I didn’t come out-”

“Already thought of my King!” Pollen perks up in front of him, a proud smile lighting her face. “You were trying to go to Chloe to comfort her on the pervious day with her father and mother. Afterwards, during the fight while you were escaping, you can claim to have a blurry memory, you somehow fell down here. Just now waking up and able to find yourself out!”

Gigga brightens, “That almost sounds like the truth!”

“One problem,” Plagg eyes him, “You’re perfectly healthy. People are going to think it’s strange how you couldn’t get out and now just showed up without a problem.”

“I could… break my arm?” Adrien hurriedly continues at the looks of horror on their faces. “I could use Gigga’s powers to make sure I don’t feel it! But everything out of here uses ladders so it’s a pretty decent reason why, especially if I didn’t wake up soon.”

“It is an effective plan, my King, but surely there is another way?”

“I’m all ears.”

The kwamis dim as they think, and Adrien pauses as he looks at his notes. On one of the pages in his destruction notebook, there’s legible notes about his condition.

He smiles, Plagg usually doesn’t care about this at all, and he makes a few extra notes about how he felt waking up as he eats and drinks some more. This isn’t priority, though he certainly doesn’t want to forget anything, because he needs to get out.

“Alright!” Adrien claps, no more delays. “Gigga, close my eyes!”

The transformation doesn’t feel great, but it gives him what he needs as he slips through the sewers. He’s been down here enough that he knows where he wants to come out if he truly got lost down here after the akuma attack. Now, it’s just a matter of preparing himself. Detransforming and getting his clothes dirty and working up a sweat. Not much is needed, he has just been laying down in them for a days now, but just that extra touch.

“Okay, Plagg, Pollen, are you ready?” At his friends’ nod, Adrien takes a deep breath and transforms with Gigga again, “Stupefy!”

The world dissolves, Adrien stumbles to the ground. He has to try not to find an anchor to ground himself, to let him float in the random sensations. He can feel Pollen and Plagg do something, the miraculous buzzing and crackling, and there is pain. Swirling around in a way that hurts but isn’t really there. It is there, but not on him. Not pressing.

In fact, nothing is pressing. There’s nothing he needs to do right now. He’s just waiting, waiting and waiting and if he’s waiting then he can go to sleep. Sleep seems nice. Yeah, sleep…

 

His arm wakes him up, a very constant throbbing that makes him instantly regret this plan.

“Hey, Kit,” There’s a tap at his forehead. “You up?”

Groaning, Adrien gives a thumbs up before delicately getting up on his knees and then pushing up onto his feet. His left arm is broken, close to his wrist. He wonders, as the limb pulses with his heart, if Plagg or Pollen knew how to make the break so it’s like he fell on it. Smart, he supposes, Adrien didn’t think about it.

“You need to leave,” Pollen points at the ladder. “The arm has swollen and you need medical attention.”

Adrien nods and, cradling his arm to his chest, climbs up. Carefully letting go with his right and balanced before rising up. The kwamis all help to push the cover when he gets up, Adrien cannot ever prove to them how grateful he is to them, and rolls out into the alleyway. Taking an inhale of the cool night’s air.

Paris gleams with lights and smells, honestly, not that great. Perhaps he just got used to the sewer smell, also not that great, but the fumes of the air prickle against his lungs. Either way, now that he’s here and wandering on the streets, he needs to figure out some way to contact Father or his bodyguard. Something-

“Adrien Agreste!” 

He flinches outright at the yell, wheezing when Rena Rouge pops down in front of him. Mostly because he can feel the surge of energy from the ring. A crackle of lightning through his bones ready to snap out at any moment.

Adrien instantly represses it, panicked, but huh. That’s also new.

Rena’s pulling out her flute, typing something that the kwamis fly around to see, and smiles at him. “Boy, am I glad to see you. You’ve had all of Paris on a frenzy trying to find you, so let’s get you to the hospital real quick, kay?”

“Oh, uh… has it been that long?” With a frown, Adrien glances up at the sky. “It was day, I think, but uh, I don’t know. It gets a little fuzzy.”

Rena’s smile almost immediately falls. Adrien knows she’s good at putting up an act if need be, but he’s also pretty confident that the concern there is genuine.

“That’s not great. I’ll wait for the ambulance to come pick you up, until then I’m gonna ask some questions, alright?”

“Uh, sure?” Adrien tries to give her a smile. “I guess.”

“What do you last remember?”

“I was trying to get to Chloe’s… I, heh, was sneaking out from my bodyguard. I don’t… I don’t remember how though. I think I got to the school, but she wasn’t there, so then I wasn’t but I don’t know where. Just waking up down in the sewers. My arm hurt and I just… I wanted to take a nap.”

“Do you remember the akuma attack? Do you remember interacting with any magic?”

“No.”

“Do you remember being unbalanced? Heard any rumbles or the like?”

“Just from being disorientated, and no.”

“Did you see…” Rena hesitates slightly. “Did you see if the walls or if anything looked especially degraded?”

“No,” Now that gets him to frown back. “Why do you ask?”

That easy grin comes back up. “Now that’s for me to worry about and not your pretty little head.”

Adrien huffs, gives an exhausted smile. “I don’t want to even think about what my hair looks like right now.”

Rena takes an exaggerated glance at one of his billboards. “It’s definitely not your normal look.”

The ambulance pulls up onto the street, and Rena smiles at him. “It looks like the professionals have arrived. I’ll leave you in their hands.”

“Thank you, Rena Rouge.”

“Of course,” She winks at him, “Can’t have my favorite model vanishing on me.”

She leaves then. And Adrien sighs as the ambulance stops in front of him.

It’s going to be a long night.

 

He’s been expelled from school.

Adrien’s not surprised, with everything he did, everything that happened, all of it, he’s not surprised. If he told Nino about it, he thinks that even his friend wouldn’t be shocked by the reaction. Well, when he tells Nino tomorrow. Right now he can’t contact anyone, phone privileges gone. He managed to get a hold of Chloe, and she said she’d put it in the group chat, but he can’t talk to anyone. Not even the kwamis, he hasn’t been left alone to do so.

Until now.

In his room, that he’ll scarcely leave because even though he’s not condemned to the room permanently, there’s no reason to be in another room here. No place he’s wanted, at least.

Adrien sniffs. Pressure building in his throat, but that doesn’t make sense. He knew full well he was going to get grounded.

But- he’s just- even though it makes sense- he got grounded- he’s trapped in here- why would Father do that when-

“Hey Kit!” Plagg flies up, grinning wildly. “You can’t be sad, there’s something I gotta tell you-”

Pollen lets out a squeak, flying up. “Is now really the right time-”

“I’m not waiting another second!” Plagg flies around, butts his back and Adrien stumbles forward. Feeling strange and floaty and focusing on the distraction.

Pollen sighs, but she goes flying to another second of the room. Pulling out a poster board of all things. Which, Adrien blinks to make sure this isn’t some type of stressed-induced hallucination, has the words- in barely legible writing that tilts sideways- YoUR HUMAN SOuL.

“Umm…”

“Here it is!” Plagg puffs up next to it. “You’re all in one guide on why your body is weird, which, wait, some of this may be out of date-”

“All the more reason to delay until we-”

“Oh no,” Adrien sits on the couch. Vaguely sensing some relief working through his body. “I want to hear this.”

Plagg nods and flips the first page, revealing a crudely shaped human, a stick figure given width basically, colored yellow as it waves. Needlessly, Adrien dimly thinks, labelled HuMAN. “Then let’s get started. So this a human soul. Uh, exciting. All yellow and normal and jazz. No magic.”

“It stands to note that souls don’t actually have a color that human eyes or technology can precieve-” Pollen starts.

“Blah blah blah, anyway,” Plagg smacks the heart of the picture. “The important thing is that a soul is completely in tune with the body. Fills it. Kinda.”

Gigga, who’s on his shoulder also watching, leans closer to his ear. “That’s not exactly how a soul works. It is integrated through the physical atoms but does not actually physically touch-”

“ANYWAY,” Plagg huffs, “What is with all the interruptions here? As I was saying, this is normal human. Boring. Moving on.”

Pollen helps in folding the next paper back, another yellow drawn human, but this time with a black outline all over it. Under it, in slightly better handwriting, tRANsFORMED.

“This is what happens when you transform with us. We only connect on a surface level, soul barely bridged to us and most of it is so that it goes through the body and then to the world.”

“It should be noted,” Pollen ignores Plagg’s glare, “That this is slightly inaccurate as a human soul and a kwami cannot be truly represented on a two dimensional like this, but it is metaphorically accurate. And, in the case of our transformation, the discomfort you felt could be likened to that your soul reacted to my powers as if it was a rash. Not terribly life-threatening, but not well-received.”

“I,” Plagg preens, “am instead like a blanket because everyone knows cats are better to have than bees.”

Plagg then ignores Pollen’s glare as he flips the next page back. This yellow human, and Adrien distantly notes that he’s kinda proud of how Plagg’s drawing skills are improving from just a few previous attempts, doesn’t have a black outline. Yet the waving hand now has black marks on it, trailing down the wrist.

Underneath it reads: AFTER CATASTROPHE.

Plagg clears his throat. “Things get a little different after you did catastrophe for the first time. I didn’t completely know what it meant, other than it was getting easier to transform with you and all previous holders with different kwamis always regarded it as a good thing. I swear Kit, I didn’t…” Plagg shakes his head, sighing.

“What this is, from what I remember,” Gigga starts up, “Is that the soul absorbs part of the concept from the miraculous. Not all of it leaving after the transformation is called off?”

Pollen nods, “Yes. This is the first instance of Adrien’s soul accepting and adapting to destruction, resulting on scars on the body from where the dormant destruction is held. Yet it is so little that there is little impact and could be completely taken out.”

Plagg flips the next page, the more of the black swirls going down through the arm. “So, uh, yeah, more stuff kinda keeps happening. The more you absorb, the more it travels to the most dense part of your soul, right around the middle of your chest. It wasn’t going fast enough to alarming until…” Plagg flips to the next page, labelled CoPY cAT. “He happened.”

Adrien immediately scowls, and he flinches- that numb shock flooding over him in tingles and pricks- when the ring responds. Destruction and power rising out from his bones.

“Right, yeah.” Plagg clears his throat, gesturing to how there’s more black than yellow on the waving hand. And, just like with the transformation, the hand is outlined though it tapers off before the elbow. “At this point, and kinda with our golden queen mess, when rather than letting the cheese develop at its own pace, things got… rushed.”

Pollen nods, “As in that the body-”

“Hey!” Plagg snaps, “My presentation! So, uh, yeah, you forced too much of my domain through at once, pulling me in, that your soul shifted to embrace and use the destruction rather than just passing it along. Forcing your body to change to accommodate the differing nature. It really still isn’t that big of a deal. The human body is one tough little thing, totally fine.”

“But then-” Pollen once again ignores Plagg’s glare as she flips the next page. “Simon Says happened.”

It says that on the page, AFTER SIMON SAYs, Adrien notes as he keeps himself afloat in the numbed ocean. He also notes Plagg’s wince.

“Okay, yeah, this is into not so great territory. You can’t, especially have the stunt you just pulled, really go back to that first paper with the human. Destruction is stuck in you, and your body was attempting to mold to that.”

“Rather unsuccessfully.” Pollen quips, “Though you managed it quite respectfully, my King.”

“Thanks,” He mutters, staring at the hand completely encased in black, the marks now going all the way up to the shoulder.

“Yeah, well, this didn’t last too long. Though it wasn’t unhealthy. I swear Kit, I know I brought up how I thought it was bad and everything but that’s because it was permanent now. It wasn’t bad.”

“But…”

Plagg glances away, flips the next page.

FU + POLLEN, it says. The human drawing breaks pattern too. On the black hand there’s now a yellow outline. And while it is still completely black to the elbow, it’s no longer marks stretching over. Just floating squiggles going up and out his shoulder and floating up to his jaw.

It looks wrong, for no other reason that it’s not following the same pattern of the page before just with more marks and more black.

“After all that, your soul was getting agitated. Like big time Kit. It was flexing and adapting pretty good-”

Pollen glances down, “Until Dark Owl, which is the leading reason behind my desire to longer transform with you. Your body couldn’t take changes anymore as your soul shifted to better accommodate a boarder miraculous set.”

“Again,” Plagg swallows, “This didn’t last long, and I’m pretty sure the main problem is just how fast you have to go through the changes. You had months between the first couple pages and then all the fainting and headaches and everything was just all of that change getting mushed into days.”

“But even then, we believed it could be managed.” Pollen continues, and it says a lot that Plagg doesn’t snap at her. “Until the fight with Ladybug happened.”

Plagg switches the page again, and Adrien blinks at it. It isn’t black all the way to the elbow, only the hand, but there are long swirling lines of black that stretch to every part of him. Loose and free and so maybe even double the amount of black on this one.

“I’m pretty sure this is right, but yeesh, wow. I could feel that it was everywhere, loose and floating without the same structure. I know your body was actively absorbing it at some point, that my powers were helping you digest food- not that much cheese for some terrible reason- but it was hitting the limit of what it could take. Even with my best efforts of keeping it out.”

“That’s why you’re so tired, right.” Adrien flops his hand to the picture. “Trying to help with this?”

“Got it in one.”

“Of course,” Pollen grabs a page enough to show that the next is empty before dropping it. “Now with what happened with the akumas has changed things again. I’d assume it’s much like this picture only that your body isn’t so strained anymore.”

There’s a bit of a silence after this, Plagg and Pollen staring at him. And he supposes he should have a reaction. This is a lot. He knows that. He knows he should probably be thinking to what this means for him. If this will happen to Nino. That maybe he can where understand where Ladybug is coming from. That he should be thinking to make it easier on him. Or how not to keep making things worse.

“Huh,” Is what comes out. “I, uh…”

He trails off, and suddenly, he realizes how very tired he is. He’s not angry anymore, he’s not stressed really either. He’s just, after this and everything and everything from before, he’s just really tired.

“Thank you for telling me.” He sighs it out eventually, standing. “I think… I think I’m going to sleep on it before I say much else.”

“Of course my King,” Pollen flies in front of him, peeling the covers back. “You deserve rest.”

“As much as you can!” Gigga nudges him faster, towards the bed despite how he hasn’t really changed into pajamas. This one time though should be fine.

Yes, Adrien’s nodding and tucking himself in. One of them gets the lights, and Adrien wonders how long it will take him to fall asleep.

He doesn’t last five minutes.

 

He startles, bones crackling with lightning once more as he snaps upright on the bed. There’s sheer power crackling over his skin when he turns at the window, tense for something, and goes still at the green superhero beyond his window. Tapping to get in, and it’s with a bit of whiplash that Adrien does.

Nino is here.

“Hey!” Carapace jumps in, “Shell off!” And then it’s Nino rushing at him, throwing his arms around him in a hug. Ever mindful of Adrien’s arm.

More so mindful when Adrien doesn’t return the hug.

How can he? When his insides are still crackling and his bones feel numb and he can’t really think about what had happened with Father and the kwamis and all of his life and now Nino is here.

It doesn’t feel real for some reason. Like he’s a step removed from reality. That Nino is as two dimensional as the human drawings Plagg made.

Which is wrong. The whole thing is just so terribly wrong.

Yet trying to get a better handle on what’s happening only makes that worse, presses in further into him, and Adrien can’t just… push through.

“Adrien?” Nino pulls back, hands still on his shoulders and his eyes wide and Adrien’s pretty sure he was crying, earlier in the day. Night. Or he rubbed his eyes to that degree of agitation for another reason. “You’re alright, right? Rena said you got to the hospital and made sure you were okay and none of the akuma stuff affected you-”

Adrien snorts, the sheer intensity of how wrong Nino is snaps and whips through his lungs. Drags him back to the world.

It is uncomfortable and harsh. Claws kneading through the inner part of his chest.

“Ohmygod, DUDE! If there’s an issue I can get Ladybug-”

“Ladybug-” Adrien all but sneers as he backs up from Nino, needing to breath, needing space as all of this thrashes inside, snarling and clawing its way out and he isn’t wake enough to think through- “is the main issue. She’s the reason why-”

Adrien stops himself and looks at him. His boyfriend. Nino. Who saw him as Adrien, Adrien but beyond the glamor and prestige of the Gabriel brand, and decided he wanted to be with him. That Nino took it upon himself to care for and worry about and told him stupid jokes in class whenever he noticed Adrien was down and talked constantly about music and films and his little brother because he must know that Adrien hates the cold silence that comes with his perfection.

Adrien has done so little in return, so very little and-

“Master-” Wayzz starts, and Adrien can see him without a single touch from Nino, mouth pulled into a frown- “Adrien’s state is frantic, I think-”

“Frantic?” Adrien repeats. “Yeah, you know what? I am done! I am so done with everyone else thinking they know better than me, that I can’t make my own choices! That I need to keep secrets and pose as someone I’m not and act according to their whims and their decisions. I’m so sick of it!”

The ring is crackling with energy and there’s a faint buzz on his head as well with a crawling sensation expanding from his throat.

“Adrien-”

“I’m not a perfect person, okay?” It rushes out of him, desperate and heated and Adrien doesn’t spare a thought to timing or Nino’s emotions or the whatever the affect this will have on the future or even what emotion this is coming from as his body begins to tense and burn. “I tried. I really did try and all that got me was pain and stress and I am sick of it! I just want to be happy! I don’t want to be so scared anymore!”

He doesn’t want to fear what Ladybug might do to him. He doesn’t want to be panicked at the idea of someone taking his miraculous at any time. He doesn’t want to think of using the ring like it’s some curse. He doesn’t want to be so conscious of the image or the backlash that will follow from Father and the public if he dares messes up. He doesn’t want to be so tightly in control of his emotions that he can’t even be honest with Nino for the sheer fear that if he isn’t Nino is going to think less of him and break things off.

He just can’t do that anymore.

He can’t keep it caged up inside him anymore.

Nino’s gasping, eyes widening and shoulders tensing and jaw dropping but Adrien has to go on. He can’t hold it back anymore. He doesn’t want to. He wants it all out and free.

He wants this gone!

“I was affected by the stupid akuma attack!” His heart seems to buckle then beats faster, voice crackling as everything starts to shake. “And I’m a little frantic and upset about it. But if I dare show that then I’m never getting out of this room! Trapped because Father refuses to listen to me!”

“Kit-!”

“I refuse to be caged in anymore.” Adrien hisses down at the ground, the floor blurry and shaking in his eyes. “I am done having to be the one ashamed of who I am and what I want!”

It was childish, the way he stamped his foot down at the end.

His anger all but freezes when the ground shifts under him because of it. When Adrien blinks the tears out of his eyes, seeing the cracks in the ground surrounding his socks, that anger very abruptly turns to fear again.

“Oh my god!” He stares at his hands. The ring isn’t flashing as it does sometimes when this happens, but his right hand is black and clawed regardless. Lashes of swirling purple energy trailing up from his arm, shifting and moving fluidly on his skin. “I couldn’t have- I- I didn’t- Plagg?”

“Wayzz, shell on!” Nino’s rushing at him again, holding onto him as he starts to panic again. At now there’s something else messed up with his soul and body because there’s always a mistake, always always always. “Hey, hey, it’s okay Adrien, it’s okay. I’m here. You’re here. It’s all okay.”

“It’s not!” Adrien wants to yell, it felt like a yell in his chest, but it comes out all choked and weird and wrong. “I nearly died, you’ve nearly died, Ladybug thinks I’m a danger and I stole your miraculous because someone stole mine and I have the bee miraculous which I know Chloe would love but I can’t just give it to her and I have another miraculous I haven’t told Ladybug about and I can’t sleep anymore and maybe Ladybug’s right because I’m losing control over the miraculous and I’m- I’m losing control over myself and I don’t know- I just- I want to be free. I want to be happy.”

Nino pulls him into a hug, squeezing him with a strength that would break him if he also wasn’t transformed by some miraculous. “And we’re going to make it better, okay Adrien? It’s- sure, it’s not great right now but trust me, one day, we’ll get there. I swear. Just hang in there and I’ll hang onto you and we’ll make it through. Okay, okay? We’ll make it through.”

Adrien openly sobs now, Nino grasping him tighter and pressing his face into him. “But the only way- the only way anyone keeps saying is that I have to give up the ring and maybe-”

“No,” Nino squeezes him tighter still, desperately, and he thinks some of his bones shift with the pressure. “We’ll figure something out and you’re going to keep on being the Chat Noir, basically the best superhero in the city.”

“I-” Adrien chokes, sobs- “I can’t say I agree with that. I think you’re just biased.”

“Well,” Nino’s shoulders twitch, as if he were trying to shrug in this position. “I could be a fool, but…”

He moves his head, only needing to adjust it by fractions as he presses a long kiss to the top of Adrien’s forehead.

“I’ve heard that there are plenty of good reasons to be a fool.”

And Adrien’s heart buckles, shattering apart within his boyfriend’s hold and he freely cries.

He isn’t sure about what, and eventually Nino’s chest begins to buckle as he cries, but Adrien does sob when he thinks at just the sheer amount that he has to cry about. About what he didn’t let himself release.

It’s all out now, between the two of them as the eventually exhaust themselves and lay down. Still clutching on tight even as they manage to take deep breaths.

 

“You promise that you’ll come over tonight?” Nino asks, half turned towards the window that he needs to go out of but turned towards him all the same.

“I promise,” Adrien smiles, a little wearily but not so physically drained after Wayzz did that sleeping trick again. On the both of them. With the promise that Adrien actually talks through this next time. “As soon as I possibility can.”

Nino opens his mouth, but then Nathalie knocks, just as Adrien said she would, and Nino shuts it with a huff. Quickly kissing his check with a whispered “you better, hang in there” before jumping out the window.

“Come in, Nathalie.” Adrien sighs out, smiling softly at the retreating green hero.

His chest sags a little, having to watch him go. He just… if only he could spend so much more time with him. Truly actually get to be around him and have fun and do nothing and just

She hums at him, before they go over all the changes with him being grounded and taken from school. The new tutors coming in, focuses on his studies, all of it and more that Adrien only gives half a mind to. He can’t give the other half, too stuck on the sheer emotional release last night and how weirdly floaty he is right now.

It doesn’t make sense, nothing really does with the whiplash of love and hate and fear and safety and hope all existing at once. Yet he gets through the day, ends up laying on his bed again. Wide awake.

Though most of the kwamis, which he thinks stayed up most of the night watching over them, doze off around him.

Adrien, once he’s sure all the kwamis are asleep, holds his hand up to the ceiling. He can see it, it’s dark but there’s plenty of light coming in from his window to see it. To see how his fingers flex, curling and expanding, stretching out until his skin strains to keep it all together.

With a thought, a gentle call to destruction but not to the ring, the skin goes black. It does seem to trail down his arm as much as the it just seems rise up. An illusion crumpling apart all at once.

As he stares, moving his hand again, mind blank and yet his thoughts feel so heavy as he stares at this, Adrien notices it’s not all black.

There’s a golden pulse, more of a wave, lighting his arm briefly before fading back under the surface.

Adrien has a soul. He can see it. See how it’s mixed in with destruction and the miraculous.

This is his soul.

His hand curls into his fist, the golden glow rising.

His soul. His life. And he will destroy what dares threaten his happiness.

Chapter 19: Epilogue: Nooroo

“That blasted cat!” Master stomps his foot down, fists and haw clenched tight. “Every time! Every time! I counter them and he just pulls out some new trick to deal with it! I’d have the miraculous by now if it weren’t for him!”

Master’s assistant dares to approach him, placing a gentle hand on his shoulder. “Then perhaps we should focus on not taking down the team as whole.”

It was a terrible thing, to feel his powers, parts of him, utterly annihilated. The connection not dissolved but never existing as Plagg pushed himself into existence with the sole focus of the destruction of his powers.

How Nooroo hates that he appreciates that so much, that he takes comfort in his powers destroyed and torn like that. He can’t help but to feel grateful, that the hate and desperation he’s bridging together is stamped out.

“What… what do you propose then? I already had an akuma get to him, but his kwami prevented me from getting him.” Master calms himself, turning back to look back at her.

Nooroo quivers when she smiles. The one so calm all the time and can cut into any problem to find a way, it is her that inspires this fear. For no matter the cost, no matter how many she may hurt in doing so, she pushes through. She has love inside her, broken and jagged and ready to hurt anything that her loves ask of her.

While Master is the one who forced his soul to wield his magic, it is her that invokes terror. To be in the presence of one who plans the downfall of destruction, one that radiates the confidence to do so. 

He can understand her ruthlessness, knows that she fears that she may lose it all if she is not direct, but understanding does not make him feel better.

Not with the target she has. Not when he knows what that will do to Plagg.

Plagg does not love easily. Nooroo does not want to imagine how the universe will suffer when all of destruction cries out against his lost. He does not think the universe can survive another great tragedy.

But he cannot voice such grief and fear.

“All we must do is render Chat Noir unable or unwilling to fight.” She explains, not a single bit of remorse of what that means. What that will do to Chat Noir and to Plagg and the rest of them. “Without him, Ladybug will not have the power to oppose us.”

“Yes,” Master smiles, “We can strip him down in front of the others, and with hope we can then build him into an akuma they cannot hope to stop. His downfall is their downfall.”

Nooroo trembles and cowers at the words, hoping that they may all survive this but yet so sure they cannot if Master is successful.

Notes:

And it's over! Book 2! Wasn't that just so much fun?!

Anyway, there will be a book 3! The end of the arc! I ended up changing quite a few things with it though so it's still a little rough and with my current schedule I don't know when I'll have enough of a backlog of chapters to start publishing it. I'd say a month? At least?

Either way, it is not the end! So I hope to have you all back someday!

Series this work belongs to:

• Part 2 of Made Miracles