Chapter Text
Thankfully, Tanjiro and his demon sister had been allowed to continue with their quest. Though, Giyuu felt the looks he got from the Hashiras as the letter was read out for everyone to hear.
Disgust and contempt.
Not that was really different from usual, he begins to realize as he sat in the garden of his own estate.
Giyuu has always been a prisoner of his own mind. He will take the actions and words of others, no matter how small, and he would mull them over. Overthink until he came multiple conclusions, then he would pick the most logical one, usually that would be the one that had himself at fault. His dear sister, Tsutako, was the first one to point this tic of his out.
"Giyuu..." She smiled fondly at him as he percisley cut the fabric for the hankerchief he was making for her. Tsutako only deserved the best after all. She was the scent of a rain during the summer, refreshing as such too, she was able to capture the hearts of many. Giyuu didn't have many talents, he knew that much, but he seemed to be decent at sewing. Sometimes his sister would even say he was better than herself. He knew that wasn't true, but the words made him feel a sense of pride. He loved his sister's encouragement.
So, when he was cutting out the fabric out the handkerchief, he obsessively kept checking the edges to ensure they were straight and clean. He had been at this portion of the project for an hour...well, maybe longer. He wasn't keeping track. Tsutako deserved nothing but the best.
"It looks perfect, little brother." She would smile at him. Much to Giyuu's dismay, he had a hard time remembering what that smile had looked like exactly. How could he call himself a good brother when he couldn't even place his late sister's smile?
"But it isn't yet!" Giyuu denied,"Not for you..."
His sister laughed, it was airy and beautiful,"Everything you make is perfect to me. Let me help you, it is more special if we make it together." With her words, Giyuu's obsessive thoughts dissipated. Tsutako set her delicate hand on his head, flattening out his messy hair. Giyuu relaxed.
Then of course, Urokodaki noticed how his mind never let him rest.
Sabito was laying in the futon, his breath was shallow and labored. He had slipped in the snow while gathering fire wood for them, hitting his head in the process. A fever had overcome him, as if the big bandage on his head wasn't bad enough. Sabito and Giyuu were usually attatched at the hip. But, Giyuu was so sore from training, he selfishly took the small amount of freetime he had to rest.
What if he hates me for not coming with him?
What if he doesn't wake up?
What if-
"Giyuu." Urokodaki's gruff voice crashed his train of thought. He looked at his Master, his eyes glazed with tears yet to fall.
"Sabito will be okay." His Master told him. For some reason, those words were the ones to make the tears finally flow. He craved that reassurance, the promise that somehow everything will end up being okay. Sabito would be okay, be with him again. Giyuu looked at Sabito's sleeping form and promised him that he would never let Sabito go alone ever again.
Oh, how Sabito breathed life into Giyuu. Even after a part of him died with Tsutako, he was able to smile again. Sabito gave him peace, he loved him for that. Though, he loved Sabito more than what was normal he would come to realize. Sabito was the autumn leaves, falling after succumbing to winter's harsh breath.
Giyuu would never forgive himself for breaking his silent promise.
Sabito deserved better.
Sabito's lips once halted the voices in Giyuu's mind. It was the first and only kiss they had shared. It was fleeting and innocent, but all too perfect. The memory smelled of salt water. Sometimes, when Giyuu cries silently in the dead of night, he catches a whiff of the memory and it makes the sobs that Giyuu choked down before then spill out in full volume.
Maybe he would spend his free night doing the same...
"What the FUCK, Tomioka?"
or maybe not.
Without missing a beat or looking back at the intruder, Giyuu replies,"I like it when you call me by my first name, you know."
Sanemi's face contorted into a scowl,"And I like it when you don't kill yourself over demons! What the fuck are you thinking?" He stood on the bridge that arched over the small river surrounding the water estate. Sanemi is used to letting himself onto the property, Giyuu had dismissed all the attendants long ago. Their staring had made him uncomfortable and his awkward ways didn't make their job any easier...it was better this way.
Giyuu sighs and looks over at Sanemi. Their relationship is quite straightforward.
They would have sex for a night every few weeks. Sanemi forgets his responsiblities for a short time, Giyuu remembers what it is like to feel needed. Win-win all around, really. Of course, there are ground rules, ones they established after a drunken celebratory night of the Demon Slayer Corps founding.
"Okay, Pretty Boy..." Sanemi had sat cross-legged in front of Giyuu. He was still shirtless, his white hair was tangled from Giyuu's grabby hands the night before, and he looked very handsome all-around,"If this...whatever this is...is going to continue - We gotta make a plan."
"...A plan?" Giyuu cocked his head to the side a bit, his neck showing dark hickies that Sanemi had bestowed to his the night before,"For what?"
Sanemi growled, narrowing his eyes,"For the next time!"
"You...want there to be a next time?" Giyuu swallowed slightly, seemingly to have missed Sanemi's previous intro.
"...Fuck you, I'm lea-" Sanemi had gone to get up.
"I want there to be a next time." Giyuu spoke quickly, his voice bled with a hint of a plead. That had caught Sanemi of gaurd, he settled back onto the ground.
"...Fine...Well, first, no kissing on the mouth." Sanemi scowled at Giyuu, wanting to see the emotion Giyuu's voice had betrayed again.
"That is understandable." Giyuu nodded. After all, kissing was something that couples do. Not fuck-buddies.
"Second - we tell NO ONE about this. I mean that - I will deny everything." Sanemi crossed his arms with a huff. Giyuu thinks he looked childish like that, but it was endearing. He nodded in agreement. He knew that Sanemi and Obanai were friends. Giyuu was also aware that Obanai didn't like him very much.
"Is there a third?" Giyuu asked Sanemi. Sanemi sighed, letting some of the nervous tension leave his body. Not that he would ever admit it, but he was relieved that Giyuu had wanted to continue this arrangement,"Do you have anything?"
Giyuu had thought on this for a moment,"...Can we not be drunk next time?"
Sanemi blinked, a bit surprised by that,"...Ya, sure...Third rule: No drunk sex."
What happened next completely blew Sanemi away.
Giyuu Tomioka gave him the smallest smile. It knocked the wind out of Sanemi.
Sanemi had started to recognize when Giyuu was overthinking. He saw how Giyuu would lock his jaw and narrow those beautiful sapphire eyes ever so slightly. He used to think that those faint actions were anger or annoyance, but these last few months had shown Shinazugawa that those emotions weren't ones that Giyuu often felt. Sanemi used to think that Giyuu was a self-important, egotistical bastard. But after their nights of sex, Sanemi studied Giyuu as he slept. Sometimes, Giyuu would sleep peacefully. Most times, Giyuu's breathing would hitch and he would start to mumble erradictly. Sanemi had no idea what kind of dreams tortured the Water Hashira, but he would silently hold him until he calmed. In the morning, Shinazugawa was quick to leave or kick Giyuu out. After all, they were just fuck-buddies.
"Giyuu. What were you thinking?" Sanemi pressed the egde in his voice to get Giyuu's attention again, but he was careful not to yell as he walked closer. He watched the way Giyuu's eyes slightly widened as he became present again.
"I was thinking she deserved a chance."
Okay, fuck the not yelling thing.
"She's a DEMON! A FUCKING DEMON! You wanna give her the chance to kill, idiot?" Sanemi got in his face, trying to get something, anything, out of Giyuu. He had started to cherish the shadows of emotions he got from the slightly shorter man. They intrigued Sanemi, usually. But, as of now, he just wanted Giyuu to realize how much of a moron he was for promising seppuku for when this demon bitch inevitably kills a human.
"She won't. I think your demonstration proved that earlie-"
"SHE WILL and you are going to DIE because you put your life on the line for an unpredictable MONSTER!" Sanemi growled.
"Why does it matter?"
Sanemi went silent, keeping his glare up. He was frustrated. He didn't understand why someone would bet their life on this. Why a demon slayer wouldn't do their damn job! He was frustrated that Giyuu was still an enigma to him after all these months. He was frustrated because losing Giyuu to a demon felt so fucking real and -
He couldn't lose anyone again.
"...Whatever, Tomioka." Shinazugawa backed up,"Fucking kill yourself, see if I care." He spat out and turned his back to Giyuu, leaving Giyuu alone in the Water Estate.