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When we first met, it was unclear which of us hated the other more. Nere wanted to be on his way back to the Menzoberranzan, but instead was sulking at my camp. I found him considerably ungrateful, especially considering we'd just rescued him from multiple hazards including actual lava, and most importantly, being mind controlled by a cult. Also even though he wasn't totally in his right mind when he committed the murders, he had committed a lot of murders. You might even say he was a mass murderer, and you'd be correct. But he seemed hell-bent on going his own way, and was enraged that it wasn't possible.
Luckily, camp midnight murder attempts were not an unfamiliar occurrence by the time he joined. I knew to cast Sanctuary before bed, but Nere hadn't noticed. When I woke up to his knife, sorry I mean his dagger +1, at my throat, I just told him to go back to bed. There was no doubt he'd have murdered me, the hatred in his red eyes burned bright. I let him take The Artifact each time he tried. Within an hour the Artifact was back, and so was he. The Artifact was the only thing keeping him from being a mind controlled thrall, and he knew it. But The Artifact chose us, not him. And he hated it, like he hated a lot of things, including himself.
Behind all his bluster it was easy to see how insecure he was. How even a small harsh word could set him over the edge. As a Drow myself and a cleric of Eilistraee, it was not surprising. The cult of Lolth was not known for being an easy place for men. We clerics of Eilistraee try to rescue Drow from Lolth when we can. Poor Nere thought he'd be welcomed as a hero if he returned to Menzoberranzan to warn them of The Absolute. I knew he was more likely to end up dead, or a drider.
How he'd ever survived in Lolth's society was a mystery to me. Perhaps he was an only child of some important house, or skirted by on his good looks. And he did certainly have those. He wasn't young by any means, but the lines on his face only served to highlight the pleasing symmetry of his countenance. Unfortunately his countenance was usually scowling, particularly at me. Being a Drow from the surface, and his rescuer, was apparently the greatest crime to him.
I told him not to worry, that after we got rid of these pesky tadpoles, he was free to go his own way, back to Lolth and whatever horrific punishment his people had in store for him.
After about a month of nightly murder/theft attempts, Nere gave up, and consigned himself to sullen contempt. He pitched his tent as far away as possible, and ate meals by himself. Of course, I couldn't help myself. The routine was I'd take some food to him, try to sit with him, and he'd curse me out and taunt me with something like "oh, here to torture your prisoner again." Or tell me he was grateful at least that the Cult of The Absolute taught him it was OK to be mean to women, because otherwise he'd have nothing to say to me. Of course I'd leave him be.
But by the time we got to The Shadow Cursed Lands, being apart from the group stopped being an option. We all huddled under torch light, fearful of the shadows. When we encountered some Harpers, we were immediately forced into a battle with shadow creatures. And to my surprise, Nere not only participated, but he helped us.
That night when I brought him dinner, I thanked him. He quickly rebuffed me, telling me he only did it to protect The Artifact. When we got to Last Light Inn and had to protect Isobel, that was also his excuse for coming to my assistance. Unfortunately he was immediately knocked out by some kind of devil creature, which meant I not only had to protect Isobel, but also Nere, who lay on the ground in a daze. He was lucky he wasn't dead. When he lay in the Infirmary later, I didn't mention any of that. I only thanked him. And for once, he didn't immediately get defensive and angry. Baby steps, I said to myself.
I reminded him that he was welcome to stay at camp, that he was under no obligation to help. "No, you need me," he said, "I'm the only wizard who is any good around here." I wanted to tell him that he only knew like 3 spells and Gale knew like 10, but I thought I might as well keep that to myself. Admittedly at least one of his spells was useful, when it landed, which wasn't often.
I don't know why I believed Nere when he told me he was some kind of big shot in The Cult of The Absolute. Our infiltration plan was to arrive with him, so he could vouch for us. Of course, Ketheric took one look at him and sentenced him to death. Apparently Nere had failed him far too many times? That was certainly easy enough to believe. We were only saved by pretending we didn't really know him, leaving him to be dragged off, cursing profusely. But to his credit, he didn't out us. Though he did leave me with a rather large problem, which was that I both wanted to complete the mission, and to rescue him. prayed he wouldn't be dead by the time we got to the dungeons. Luckily, he wasn't dead, just, as usual, angry. He told us to leave him there. I told him to look me in the eye and tell me he didn't want to live, that if he did that, I'd believe him, and leave him behind while we rescued the other prisoners.
"Have you been crying?" he said, looking up at me with scorn, "you surface Drow truly are beyond weak." Yet he took my hand as I led him to the boat.
After that, his new thing was to constantly berate me for caring about him. Calling himself my "favorite prisoner." I pointed out, jokingly, that he was our only prisoner so that didn't mean anything. For once he did not scowl and I thought I saw the faint echoes of a smile on his recalcitrant face.
When we stormed Moonrise Tower after freeing The Nightsong, it was his turn to save me. It was like we were alternating, probably because he wanted to ensure he didn't owe me anything. That's probably what he told himself. But I heard him when he thought I was insensible. How he first cursed me out, then begged me not to die, cradling me in his arms. I could not wait to tease him about it, though I really was enjoying it. I really was hurt, but I could have said something, if I'd wanted him to stop. Which I didn't. Five healing potions later, he helped me to my feet before berating me for being unprepared and "soft." I ignored him, we had a battle to win.
As we confronted Ketheric, I personally enjoyed how angry Ketheric was to see Nere alive. Admittedly, I liked that Nere was alive too. Maybe it was a real dick move that I left Nere behind when we went into the mindflayer colony. I didn't want to bring anyone who didn't have my back completely. I thought maybe Nere did at this point, but I couldn't be sure. When we returned to Moonrise, victorious, he had many choice words for me about how valuable he was as a wizard and how it was foolish to leave him behind. But I saw in his eyes something new— that he was hurt, and also worried.
Later at camp, I brought him some dinner, and for once he didn't tell me to leave. That was good, as I didn't want to leave. I'd come to appreciate his company more than I expected. It was a very romantic moment, especially when he told me that he couldn't wait to never see me again. I couldn't help but laugh. His act was getting thin, especially since, as he said it, he was caressing my face and looking like he wanted to kiss me very badly. And I admit I was tempted, but this was a man who only knew affection as transactional. Even if he genuinely wanted to kiss me, there was also some part of him that believed he had to kiss me, that it was a way to ensure I'd protect him. He really did still need my protection and I didn't want to exploit him.
Instead, I pulled him into a chaste hug. He stiffened at first, but slowly I felt him practically melt into my arms. I wondered what his face looked like. I hoped he was smiling. I imagined what his smile might look like, with his cute cleft chin and that honestly adorable little mole under his left eye. He'd be so mad if he knew I was thinking this, and that made me smile.
"Don't think I hate you any less than I did before," he said softly as he rested his head on my shoulder, "I'm just tired."
"The tadpoles are dead… guess you'll be off then," I said. We were sitting by the dock, having somehow managed to survive the last battle. "You're welcome to come with us to the tavern, of course," I added.
"Never," Nere scowled.
"OK, well I guess it's goodbye then. I'm glad I met you…" I trailed off as I started to walk away. But he took my hand, stopping me.
"All my life, all I've known is cults, the cult of Lolth, the cult of The Absolute," he said, his thumb stroking my hand affectionately, "you showed me I didn't have to go back. You saved me, and I've been wretched to you." He looked down, shaking his head. "I don't deserve any of the help and care you've given me. I didn't want it, but I needed it."
"You don't have to go, Nere," I replied, taking his other hand and facing him, "in fact, I'd like it if you didn't go— if you stayed here, with me,"
"You would have me?" he said, incredulous, "you are more foolish than I thought."
"Yes, you're right, I am a fool," I think I said, "do you mind that?"
"No, not at all," Nere said, "I've always hated fools, despised their weakness, feared that others thought me a fool more than anything else —until I met you. If I had been in your shoes, I would have left me to die in that cave. I'm glad there are fools like you. And myself, I am certainly a fool. I'll not make excuses, but you baffled me."
Just as I was going to praise him for admitting he was a fool he said "I don't need your protection anymore, but I do need you," before pulling me in for a kiss.
I did drag him to the tavern, but since we'd arranged to spend the night in a private room, he wasn't as grumpy as usual. And we did leave early. Once we got to our room he made up for all the mean things he said, and the times he tried to murder me. And I finally solved the mystery of how he'd survived in Lolth Drow society. As a lover, I can't say I've had any other like him, though this time was also different for him. He wasn't trying to merely survive, but to express his undeniable love for me.