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Hand trembling, Kieran recalled his last Pokemon as it fainted. Cheers erupted from their few spectators, slowly being drowned out by ringing in his ears. His breath and heart were quickening.
He lost. To her. Again .
He had spent the past several months training for this battle and this battle alone, whether anyone knew it or not. He had fought and pushed and clawed his way to the top of his class, the rank of Blueberry Champion, not for the title, but the strength. He had dedicated himself to becoming the strongest, so he'd never need to rely on anyone ever again. So he could prove himself just as good and trustworthy and capable as she was.
He looked down at the ground as his vision tried to blur. Before he had come back from the Kitakami trip, his bangs could always act as a convenient curtain to hide his eyes - to conceal his tears if they got out of hand. He had started pulling them up out of his face as soon as he had returned to Blueberry Academy - he didn't want to be seen as the shy, sad boy anymore. He didn't want to be that boy anymore… but it meant he had little to hide his frustration.
His hands curled into the tightest fists he could manage, shaking. He had no idea how to respond. His classmates and professors had watched him turn from a mopey crybaby into a serious battler. He didn't want to lose his cool in front of them, but he wanted so badly to yell and cry and pull at his hair and punch the ground - to demand to know what exactly he hadn't done to beat her? Why she came all this way to humiliate him again? What he was doing wrong -
His head shot up as her hands came down on his shoulders, gripping them firmly. Wait, when had she crossed the field?
"Kieran, please listen to me."
She met his eyes, her gaze and frown more intense than it had ever gotten during their battles.
When she first saw him as Blueberry Academy's Champion - when she heard the monologue he had carefully practiced just for their rematch - he was hoping she'd at least be a bit happy for him. But no, she just stared with that little concerned face of hers. Why? Was she afraid he'd beat her? Did she want him to stay weak forever? That was what his sister seemed to think would happen, and he'd shown both of them.
Or, at least, he had tried. Not that it did any good in the end.
What did she want now? She had won. She was still stronger, he was still weaker, and he'd have to keep trying. What more was there to-
"You did AMAZING, do you hear me? You are amazing!"
His mouth dropped open.
"I- wha?"
He blinked at her dumbfounded. She glanced away, tumbling over her words.
"I should've told you this before you left Kitakami, because it was true then, but I'm bad with words, so I'm telling you now!
I- I can't-"
She lifted her right hand off of his shoulder, gesturing through the air.
"-even begin to tell you how much stronger you are than 99% of trainers I've faced. Even back in Kitakami! A-and now you've come so much farther-"
Her right hand swung wide, drawing his eyes to the elite four watching from afar. He got some nods, some clapping, a thumbs up. They were all smiling. Behind them, he even caught a glimpse of Carmine in the stands, waving at him.
"-And everyone's proud of you!"
Her hand swung back, landing on her chest.
"I'm so proud of you!"
She was smiling with her whole face when he met her gaze again, through the tears in her eyes- WHEN HAD SHE STARTED CRYING?
"I- You-
Do you really mean that?"
She nodded before clumsily wiping her face with her sleeve jacket, finally loosening her grip on his shoulder, although she still didn't let go.
"Yes! I just…
You need to understand: there's more to being a Pokemon trainer than just strength. I'm not the strongest-"
Easy for her to say. His thoughts must have shown through his face; she gave his shoulder a squeeze.
"Really! There's- odds are, there's always gonna be a trainer stronger than you or me. I love battling, but the real reason I became a trainer was to make friends and grow with my Pokemon-"
Kieran startled as her Pokemon suddenly interrupted, draping itself over her shoulder as if on cue. She brought her hands up to cradle its head for a moment before turning her attention back to him.
"They're the reason we can grow so strong, after all!"
Her Pokemon looked at him with expectant eyes. He lifted his hand up and hesitantly stroked it, earning him a contented noise from it and a chuckle from her. He took the moment to process his thoughts.
She was…proud. Of him. Had been this whole time. Didn't think he was weak, even though he kept losing to her.
She spoke up again, drawing his attention back.
"I'm sorry I didn't tell you before you left. I thought about staking out by the bus stop the day you had to leave, but I misread the schedule, and…
Do you remember that picnic you suggested back during the school trip? Do you think I could take you up on it now?"
"I…"
Part of him was still upset. Really upset. About all the losses, about Ogerpon, but-
"I've got some of my Paldean friends visiting with me this time, and one of them makes the best sandwiches you'll ever eat!"
Looking at her up close again, beaming at him like the night of the festival…
"I… not… right now. I need some time. But… maybe later?"
Her face fell, but she did her best to keep her chin up and nod anyway.
"Ok. I'll be visiting Blueberry Academy for a good while, so no rush. I'll see you around, ok?"
They finally separated. She was a few steps away before she suddenly whirled around and called back in a joking tone.
"And don't think you can hide in your room this time! For one of my friends, doors are just a suggestion!"
He looked back in confusion.
"What, like, they just break into your dorm?"
She grinned with her whole face.
"Let's just say I've never slept in past a class since I've known her and leave it at that!"
So his own room might not even be safe to brood. Fun. He shook his head as she spun back around and ran for the exit on her side of the arena.
It wasn't until he was back in the locker room that he paused to think again.
Make friends and grow with her Pokemon, huh? That was her secret? It seemed like a silly thing to say, but she had been so earnest. He didn't doubt that was where she really believed her strength came from.
Was that why Ogerpon had wanted to go with her so badly? Not just because she was strong, but because she was friendly?
That was part of why Kieran had taken a liking to her too, wasn't it?
As he sorted out his items and his team, he found himself hovering over Furret's PC slot. Furret was one of his earliest, dearest catches, but he hadn't used it much since the Kitakami trip. Since he reworked his team to try to beat her.
One withdrawal and Pokeball later, Kieran was greeted with a happy cry and a fluffy tackle he hadn't even realized he'd missed.
Maybe she had a point after all.