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Jackie groans in frustration as she opens the newest bill from her insurance company. She’d had to get an emergency appendectomy last month and they were dragging their feet over payment, trying to find any reason it wasn’t medically necessary. Jackie has had to call them twice already to try and get them to pay out. She’s stuck staring at the words, stewing in her frustration when strong arms wrap around her waist. Jackie leans back, soaking in the warmth and the comfort Shauna’s presence always brings.
“They still being dicks about it?” Shauna asks, arms squeezing sympathetically.
“Of course they are,” Jackie sighs in irritation. “Teachers get the worst quality health insurance then get pushed into roomfuls of sick kids every year. It’s the law of the universe.”
Shauna hums thoughtfully as she reads the letter over Jackie’s shoulder. If she can’t dispute this bill, Jackie’s about to lose six months’ pay for not dying. Go figure.
“You know,” Shauna’s voice is light, too light, and Jackie is suddenly terrified about what she’ll say next. She always tries to lower Jackie’s guard before saying something she doesn’t want to hear. “My insurance is pretty good.”
Jackie snorts, tension draining out of her immediately. “Not a great time to brag, Shippy. I get it, your boss actually cares if you die, whoop de friggin doo.”
“If we got married,” Shauna keeps talking like Jackie didn’t say anything at all. Jackie’s back is suddenly ramrod straight, and she knows Shauna can feel it. “You could take advantage, too. Just in case something like this happens again.”
Shauna just waits patiently, knowing Jackie needs time to process. She’s always been good at that, knowing when Jackie needs silence and when she needs to be pushed. Sometimes, Jackie’s thoughts come so quickly they pile on top of each other and her mind grinds to a halt. When that happens, she needs to be asked follow-up questions to grease the gears and find a specific trail to follow. Other times, her mind is stuck on one specific train of thought, and she just needs to let it reach its natural end before she can put any of it into words.
The main thing on Jackie’s mind now is that the two of them have a good thing going. The Jeff Affair almost tore them apart, it actually did keep them apart for three years. But once they finally reconnected, there was no going back.
They’d established a friends with benefits dynamic before the dust had settled. Fucking their issues out helped just as much, maybe more, than actual conversation. Even after they stopped needing sex to communicate, it just kept happening. The other Yellowjackets kept trying to get them together, kept acting like Jackie and Shauna were a couple. Their dynamic worked, though. It was good. And they’d both decided years ago that dating was overrated anyways, they only needed each other.
Now Shauna was talking about marriage. It would be for practical reasons, and nothing would have to change— except your last name, Jackie’s mind whispers. The thought of being a Shipman makes warmth rush through her entire body, but their friends would never let them live it down. Jackie tries to think of any other reasons to say no but draws a blank. Their friends’ judgement is a pretty strong deterrent on its own, but Jackie also really wants to plan a wedding now that it’s on the table.
She’s always had a soft spot for weddings, and the idea of planning one had been the only appealing aspect of dating boys. Part of accepting that she was a lesbian had been accepting that marriage wouldn’t be a possibility for her. She’d come out during her freshman year at Rutgers with the understanding that marriage belonged to a version of her that no longer existed. Then it had started becoming something she could hope for again, something she could have. But by then, she had Shauna, and whatever they had was for life. Marriage was never supposed to be a part of them, and being with Shauna was all Jackie would ever need.
Now, though, with the possibility back on the table, the excitement quickly overtakes everything else. She thinks about Shauna standing across from her, reading heartfelt vows and promising forever, and Jackie knows she’ll say yes. She can’t resist teasing Shauna a bit, though. Payback for the initial heart attack.
“That was a pretty shit proposal, you know,” Jackie starts, conversationally. Shauna’s arms tense around her stomach again and Jackie flexes her abs in response, just to hear Shauna’s sharp intake of breath. “Maybe if you get a ring, put a little more effort in, I’ll consider it.”
Before Jackie has even finished speaking, Shauna’s arms drop, and she stalks off. Jackie whips around, worried she’d genuinely upset her, but Shauna is already in their bedroom. Jackie hears her rummaging around and approaches the doorway cautiously. If Shauna was actually mad, she would’ve slammed the door shut, and probably locked it for good measure. Trying to stay optimistic, Jackie peeks into the open doorway and sees Shauna digging into her nightstand drawer. After a few minutes of rustling and cursing, Shauna slams the drawer shut, standing up with one arm hidden behind her. She walks up to Jackie, grabs her hand and smiles before dropping to one knee.
Jackie’s mouth is agape as Shauna reveals a small velvet box. Shauna looks up at her, smile smug, as she opens it. The ring is both ridiculous and beautiful. It’s gold and shaped like a bee— Yellowjacket, Jackie’s mind supplies— with crushed black diamonds to make the stripes and small white diamonds on the wings. Jackie just stares, mind uncomprehending, as Shauna visibly gathers her thoughts.
“It was supposed to be a birthday gift,” Shauna admits sheepishly. “But I thought it could be a good engagement ring, too. I can get you another one, if you want. Anything you like.”
Shauna’s thumb rubs Jackie’s knuckles gently as her voice goes soft. “You’re the best friend I’ve ever had, and we have built something, you and me. Something made to last. You are all I have ever wanted or needed, and I have made it my life’s purpose to give you everything you could possibly dream of. You deserve to have the fairytale day you’ve always imagined, with the dresses and flowers and a room full of people who love you unconditionally. I want, more than anything, to give it to you. We’re forever, and I think it’s about time the rest of the world knows that, too. So, what do you say, Jax? Will you marry me?”
Jackie is nodding uncontrollably before the question even leaves Shauna’s lips, grabbing the ring and putting it on her finger before tackling Shauna back onto the floor. She’s giggling into Shauna’s neck, unable to contain her happiness, and Shauna’s arms come around her shoulders, gripping tight. Jackie had worried that Shauna would just want a quick courthouse wedding, to sign the papers and be done. Jackie would do it, of course. If Shauna didn’t want a big wedding, Jackie would never push her. The fact that Shauna wants it, though. Wants it for Jackie. It’s almost more than she can take, her heart pounding so hard she’s worried it’ll jump out of her and into Shauna. Shauna and a ring. It’s more than Jackie ever dared dream about.
At that thought, she pulls back a little to admire the ring. It’s a perfect fit, of course, Shauna has always been incredible at picking out gifts. Jackie can feel the dopey smile pulling her cheeks taut, and Shauna is watching her from below, a twinkle in her eyes and small smile on her lips. Jackie can’t resist leaning down to kiss her. They’re both smiling too much to do more than mash their lips together, but it’s the most perfect moment of Jackie’s life.
“You know,” Jackie uses the conspiratorial voice that makes Shauna raise an amused eyebrow. “I have one more of those expensive bath bombs left, if you wanted to celebrate properly.”
Without even bothering to respond, Shauna sits up and grabs Jackie’s legs securely before standing. Jackie can’t stop the surprised squeal that rips from her throat as Shauna jerks them both upright. She sways backward for a moment, unbalanced, before quickly righting herself. She carries Jackie to their bathroom before setting her on the sink and leaning down to start the water. Jackie just kicks her feet back and forth, watching Shauna test the water temperature as it heats up. She looks adorable, a little furrow between her brow as she adjusts the knobs until it feels just right.
Once the plug has been put in and the bath bomb is dissolving, Shauna comes back to her, situating herself between Jackie’s legs. She starts lifting Jackie’s shirt, and Jackie raises her arms obediently. Jackie knows the look in her eyes is way too soft but can’t bring herself to care. Shauna is the only one around to see it, and Shauna has no room to judge. The way she’s looking at Jackie can only be described as reverent.
Shauna gets in these moods sometimes, where all she wants to do is take care of Jackie. Sometimes, that looks like Shauna’s head between her legs until she’s so overstimulated she can’t stop twitching, hips rolling into nothing for what feels like hours after. Other times, Shauna will cook a multi-course meal, all of Jackie’s favorites all at once, making sure Jackie eats as much as she needs to feel full. In moments like this, Shauna wants to be soft. She wants to undress Jackie and hold her and feel like she’s keeping her safe.
Jackie loves it all, and she can’t help the twinge of satisfaction she gets when she remembers Shauna doesn’t do this for anyone else. When Nat asks Shauna to cook for her, Shauna just rolls her eyes and throws a frozen dinner at her head. When Misty gets emotional and wants a hug, Shauna will fully remove herself from the room, not even bothering to make an excuse. Jackie is free to borrow anything of Shauna’s, everything in their apartment is considered communal property between them. But when Lottie tried to borrow a hair tie without asking, Shauna went so far as to rip it off her head. She was in a bad mood the rest of the day and didn’t snap out of it until Jackie offered to give her a massage.
Knowing that the Shauna who does all of that is the same one gently taking off Jackie’s clothes and rubbing her arms to fight the goosebumps popping up, makes Jackie feel unbelievably powerful.
And it isn’t like Shauna is a bad friend to everyone else. She’ll sit on the phone with Taissa for hours while she spirals about not meeting yet another impossible goal. She bought Lottie a new pack of hair ties in apology as soon as she calmed down. She’s been mentoring Akilah as she tries to break into the publishing industry, working hard to get her name to anyone with a modicum of influence. She keeps a drawer of Van’s favorite movies, so she can find them quickly when she needs comfort.
Shauna is a great friend to everyone, but she’s best for Jackie. She’s only truly soft with Jackie. It’s the most incredible rush in the world.
They’re relaxing quietly in the tub, Jackie’s back against Shauna’s front, when the thought comes back to her. “You know everyone is going to be worse than usual when they hear about the engagement, right? They’ll say it’s proof that we’re in a relationship.”
Jackie’s eyes drift to her ring on the counter as she says it, and Shauna scoffs. “Who cares what they think? We’ve never exactly been conventional.”
“Do you think they might be right?” Jackie tries to be cautious, not wanting to upset Shauna, but she’s been wondering for a while. Her mom has always said that if everyone around you is saying the same thing, they might have a point. “Are we in love?”
To Jackie’s relief, Shauna doesn’t bristle at the question. She just hums in thought and kisses Jackie’s shoulder absentmindedly. “I’ve loved you the same way my entire life. Even at our worst, my feelings never really changed. I think I would’ve noticed if I’d fallen in love at some point, right?”
“I feel the same way,” Jackie can’t help but shimmy a little in relief, water sloshing over the sides of the tub. She loves it when they’re on the same page. Shauna laughs softly and wraps her arms tighter around Jackie’s waist to keep her still. Jackie leans back into her, trying to relax again. Her foot is jiggling but the rest of her is sinking into Shauna, boneless. Jackie counts it as a win.
“Plus, all the books and movies and songs say that when you’re in love you know it. I don’t know it, do you?” Jackie turns around just enough to see Shauna shake her head, and she smiles in relief. “Cool, so since neither of us know, we can’t be in love. We’re just besties and our friends are just weirdos.”
Jackie nods once, decisive. She can feel Shauna mirror her mockingly from behind and Jackie shoots an elbow back in retaliation. It pushes a little “oof” out of Shauna before she starts groaning exaggeratedly.
“Now I’m going to need an appendectomy,” Shauna whines, and Jackie can’t help but laugh. She’s never felt this happy before and it’s all because of Shauna. When she really thinks about it, most of her happiness tends to be about Shauna. She wonders briefly if she should be concerned about that before brushing it off. They’ve always been this way. If Shauna is happy, so is Jackie. They’re so connected, sometimes Jackie is convinced she can’t feel anything unless Shauna feels it, too. It’s just how they work.
With that thought taking root in her head, Jackie starts to contemplate the wedding. She has so much to plan. She knows the ceremony itself is mostly for her benefit, but she wants to make sure Shauna has a good time, too. It should be a day for both of them.
Her head is already spinning with ideas for venues and color schemes and dresses. Does she want to try inviting her parents and give them one last chance to be in her life? Who should be her maid of honor? She always figured it would be Shauna, but now Shauna is in the only position that suits her better. Who should they have officiate? How will they get their friends to accept that they aren’t in a relationship? Jackie really has no idea why it’s so hard to understand. They’re best friends with benefits who aren’t interested in being with anyone else and now they’re engaged. It really isn’t all that complicated or confusing.
There is one thought that keeps coming back. A thought that puts a giddy smile on her face as Shauna washes her hair. No matter what happens, the best part of the wedding will be the person with her at the altar.
*****
Wedding planning is a calmer affair than Jackie had expected. If this was a couple years ago, Jackie would be going all out. She’d hire a wedding planner and make the ceremony as big and involved as she could. She still likes the idea of a big wedding, but she can also see the beauty in something more intimate. She doesn’t feel like she has to make some kind of statement. She’s just committing to her best friend. It’s a decision she’s made every single day for most of her life, so the ceremony of it all doesn’t feel as life changing as it otherwise might.
Jackie called up Momma Shipman the day after the proposal, with Shauna hovering awkwardly in the background, to share the news. She was, predictably, ecstatic, and she started crying when Jackie asked if they could use her backyard for the ceremony. She even offered to officiate, which Jackie gratefully took her up on. Deb had always been more of a mom to Jackie than her own, and it meant the world to have her support. It also solidified Jackie’s decision not to invite her parents. She had given them plenty of chances to love her, and they don’t deserve any more of her energy. It’s going to be a day about her and Shauna. There is no room for anyone who doesn’t love them both.
They decided that the ceremony itself should be small, just their closest friends. They would have a larger reception at the community center with everyone else. Shauna had put herself in charge of the guest list claiming that Jackie would “invite everyone they’d ever met” which wasn’t completely off base. Jackie had been trying to track down an address for their high school trig teacher when Shauna brought it up. She just felt bad excluding anyone, but luckily for their budget, Shauna didn’t have those same concerns. She’d even been planning to send special notices to everyone who wasn’t invited (mainly Jackie’s parents) just to rub it in their faces. Jackie had been able to talk her down, but she wouldn’t be surprised if a few had been sent out anyways.
Beyond that, Jackie had planned their color scheme and decorations, while Shauna had focused on catering and finding a DJ. Jackie had been able to talk her into letting Kristen sing their first dance song, which they spent days deciding on. They wanted something meaningful but more upbeat. Slowly swaying together in front of a room full of people sounded excruciating to both of them and gave Jackie flashbacks to her prom coronation dance with Jeff. Eventually, they found a song that they had danced to together as kids. Something that reminded them of happier times and the giddy feeling of becoming best friends. It was perfect, and Kristen squealed so loud she practically burst their eardrums when they asked her to sing it.
After the arrangements had been made, they were left with the daunting task of telling their friends they were engaged. They had put it off as long as they reasonably could, but invitations had to go out soon. Kristen and Momma S had been sworn to secrecy, though Jackie is 75% sure Kristen had already told Misty. That still left the rest of the team, though, and any coworkers they liked enough to see in their free time. While trying to decide how best to break the news, they considered a conference call or setting up a group meeting. In the end, they chickened out and sent a long email that they avoided reading the responses to for a week. Then, they sat down together with a bottle of wine and multiple plans for damage control.
Laura Lee had been the first to offer her congratulations and support. She had always been the best at minding her own business and Jackie made a mental note to give her a huge hug next time they saw each other. Lottie had asked some suspicious questions about dream vacation spots and how much time they’d take off work. Jackie wanted to tell Lottie she didn’t need to give them anything extravagant, but Shauna had replied to the questions before she could.
Mari begged to be their photographer, and Akilah offered to help them decorate. Jackie texted her later to ask for help with her vows. She wanted to make sure they were perfect, and Akilah was the second best writer she knew. Misty had sent a bunch of questions about dress code and etiquette. Shauna didn’t even finish reading them, but Jackie made sure to respond to every single one. Gen wanted to be the flower girl and Melissa asked to be their ring bearer.
Nat had just responded, “Seriously?” which was less than encouraging. Taissa was similarly unsupportive, just sending “K”. Van had sent a picture of herself laughing hysterically. It was blurry, probably because of the hysterical laughter, but they could barely make out Tai in the background flipping them off. Wonderful.
All in all, it was much more positive than either of them had dared hope for. Still riding the high from getting so much support, Jackie and Shauna decided an engagement party was in order, Yellowjackets only. They found a date that everyone was free to get together at their favorite bar and hoped for the best. Optimism had served them well so far, and Jackie figured their teammates had earned the benefit of the doubt.
*****
Natalie slams through the door like a woman on a mission, and Jackie has the sinking feeling that her optimism has been misplaced. She’s still kicking herself for lowering her guard as Nat pulls her away from Shauna and towards the bathroom hallway. Shauna steps away from the bar, clearly about to come along but Jackie shakes her head and Shauna backs down, still watching their retreat distrustfully. Once they’re alone, Nat drops Jackie’s wrist and turns to her, nostrils flaring.
Jackie makes sure her head is high and she isn’t giving into the instinct to cower as Nat says, “What the hell is wrong with you two? Seriously, was there some untreated concussion none of us noticed? Did you just fuck each other stupid?”
Jackie rolls her eyes; she should have known Natalie wouldn’t drop her wild accusations for this one night. She lets her eyelids fall closed and pinches the bridge of her nose between two fingers. They’ve been having this same argument on and off for years, and the wedding seems to have put it back on.
“There’s nothing wrong with us, Nat. Two lesbians can just be friends, you know,” Jackie can almost feel Nat’s incredulous look. She waits a beat before lowering her hand and opening her eyes, trying to avoid that look as long as she can.
Nat laughs sharply as soon as Jackie re-establishes eye contact. “Obviously lesbians can just be friends, Jack. That’s why I’m not saying this about you and Van or Tai or Lottie or Laura Lee or Misty fucking Quigley! Your entire friend group is gay, but the only person you are definitely more than friends with is the woman you’ve been obsessed with your entire life and have been fucking exclusively for half a decade.”
Jackie crosses her arms, knowing she looks petulant but unable to stop herself. “People have accused you and me of hooking up, does that mean I’m secretly into you?”
“No, it means I have wild animal magnetism and I’m accused of fucking everyone I know,” Nat waves her off easily. “You on the other hand are getting full on married to the person you have weekly date nights with. The two of you have been together for six years now but refuse to actually admit it. So, please, for my sanity, just fucking admit it!”
“They’re friend dates,” Jackie has explained it to them so many times. She has no idea why her friends refuse to understand her and Shauna’s dynamic. They’re always trying to make them into something they aren’t. Jackie had hoped that the Yellowjackets would’ve outgrown this childish need to push the two of them together by now.
Natalie looks ready to punch her, and Jackie feels a morbid sense of satisfaction. Good, she thinks, let them all be mad about it after hounding us for so long.
“Let me ask you something,” Nat starts, visibly forcing herself to relax. “Have you ever been in love?”
“No,” Jackie says it decisively, knowing any sign that she’s unsure will set Nat back on her little crusade.
“Have you ever been close?” Nat continues.
“No,” This time, Jackie rolls her eyes. She has no idea where this is going and they’re never going to get anywhere with it. She and Natalie have both made their stances clear on this.
“Okay,” Nat tries to look encouraging as she asks, “How can you be sure?”
“I,” Jackie starts before the words die in her throat. She’s supposed to know if she’s in love. She isn’t supposed to need to know if she isn’t. That’s a completely different thing. How is she supposed to feel if she doesn’t know anything at all? Nat’s just watching her patiently, waiting for an answer. A sudden thought makes Jackie rear back.
“Wait,” She holds a hand up, needing to make sure. “You aren’t implying I was in love with Jeff, are you?”
The thought is horrifying, and Jackie has to fight not to retch. Nat seems to agree as her eyes widen and her face goes pale. “Jesus, no dude, I was obviously talking about Shipman. Why would you even think that?”
“I mean, Jeff is the only person I’ve really dated,” Jackie shrugs, feeling a lot better after the clarification. “It made the most sense.”
Natalie groans in frustration, throwing her head back quite dramatically. Jackie wonders if she’s been hanging out with Mari or Kristen, Nat usually isn’t this theatrical.
“It makes absolutely zero sense. Okay, let’s try something else,” Nat tilts her head in thought before saying, “You know how you’ve been keeping an emotion log, to get better at identifying your feelings?” Jackie nods, the log had actually helped a lot. She and Shauna both started doing it a few months into their reconciliation. It made communication a lot easier when they could figure out what they felt and why. “Did you keep track of love?”
“Duh,” Jackie snorts. “Love is an emotion, Nat. Obviously I’d write it down.”
“And how often did you feel it because of Shauna?” Natalie raises her eyebrow expectantly.
Jackie can see where this is heading. It doesn’t prove anything, though. Love and being in love are totally different.
“That doesn’t matter,” Jackie decides not to give Nat the satisfaction of being right. She knows that almost every time she felt strong love was due to Shauna, but no one else needs to know. Nat would try to make it mean something it absolutely doesn’t. “I love Shauna just like I loved Shauna when I was 5. I mean, I would know if my feelings had changed at some point, I’m not that out of touch.”
Jackie can recognize that she’s getting a little defensive now, but she can’t help herself. Natalie just won’t quit, and Jackie needs her to stop pushing this.
“Have you considered that you might have been in love with her the whole time?” Nat says it softly, but Jackie bristles anyway.
The truth is that she hadn’t considered that possibility. But that doesn’t matter because it isn’t true. Kids can’t fall in love like that, their brains are too mushy or something. Jackie is pretty sure she read something about that during one of her education courses. You have to go through puberty before you can fall in love, she’s pretty sure.
“I honestly feel sorry for you, Nat,” Jackie says, diplomatically. Nat looks at her like she’s grown a second head, but Jackie is undeterred. “Platonic love can be just as meaningful as romance, and you should really try letting more intimacy into your friendships. It can be very fulfilling.”
While Nat is still staring in clear bewilderment, Jackie ducks around her to head back to the bar. She misses Shauna and that conversation was going nowhere anyways. Who does Natalie think she is? Jackie and Shauna know how they feel. They’re solid. Nat doesn’t get to come in and try to mess that up.
As she gets closer to the bar, Shauna comes into view and the smile on Jackie’s face appears without her even realizing. It dims a little when she sees Taissa having an intense conversation with Shauna, holding up her fingers like she’s counting something down. She has a stern look on her face as she raises an eighth finger. When Jackie gets within hearing range, Tai says, “—punched a hole in my wall the last time she went on a date with someone else. Stop being an idiot.”
Jackie can’t help the warmth she feels at the statement. She had suspected, after a rushed phone call from Van followed by a broody Shauna, that something had happened. It had been one disaster of a date her senior year of college, after she and Shauna had started sleeping together but before they had decided to be exclusive. The girl had been nice enough, but her hair was too blonde, her smile too wide, and she had no strong opinions about classic literature.
The next time Jackie had gone to visit Brown, Shauna hadn’t even let her say hi before she was fucking her into the squeaky dorm bed. As she was pushing her hand down Jackie’s unbuttoned pants, Shauna made her promise to never be with anyone else. After that, they figured they were overdue for a long talk. They both agreed that they didn’t need anyone but each other and decided to give up on dating entirely. Hearing how worried, how protective, Shauna had been makes Jackie feel like the most important person in the world.
She quickly saddles up to Shauna’s side before she can respond to Taissa. Shauna is looking at Tai like she’s deciding exactly how to maim her, and Jackie knows she needs to step in if they don’t want to get banned from their bar forever.
“How have you and Van been, Taissa?” Jackie makes sure her smile is wide and sincere, even as Tai flinches at the question. The two of them had been on and off for years, Taissa’s ambition becoming something even Van had trouble competing with. Van had come over a couple nights ago, heading straight to her movie drawer to pull out Josie and The Pussycats. For reasons beyond Jackie, it’s her go-to when she and Tai are on the rocks. If Taissa wants to judge everyone else on their relationships, Jackie is ready to make sure she can back it up.
Shauna relaxes subtly next to her, letting Jackie take the reins on this discussion. Jackie loves her for it, for how far they’ve come. Now, Jackie can take charge and Shauna won’t resent her for it. She knows if she oversteps, Shauna will let her know. It may not always be in the healthiest way (like the time Shauna had packed her bloody slices of raw meat for lunch after they butted heads about meal prepping), but nothing is bottled up anymore.
Tai looks from Jackie’s arm around Shauna’s waist to the haughty expressions they’d been practicing since middle school, and scoffs. “Fine, I get it. If you two want to live your lives in denial, I can’t do anything to stop you. Let’s just enjoy the night.”
She raises her beer and nods to them both in reluctant acceptance. Jackie feels all the fight drain out of her and she offers Tai a grateful smile. She can feel Nat’s eyes on her from where she’s still sulking in the corner, but with Taissa backing down, she’s on her own now. Van might think they’re idiots, but she won’t say anything about it.
Everyone starts enjoying themselves more after the heated discussions die down. Jackie and Shauna’s united front and unwavering belief in their dynamic had proven too much, even for Natalie. It’s shaping up to be a fun, mostly drama free night when Jeff Sadecki walks through the door.
Jackie knows he doesn’t usually come to this bar. If he came anywhere near it, it would stop being her and Shauna’s regular place in a heartbeat. The fact that he’s here, on the night of their engagement party, sets alarm bells off in Jackie’s head. They’d only invited the team, wanting to keep the night more low-key. Some of them may have issues with Jackie and Shauna’s choices, but Jackie can’t imagine any of them bringing Jeff of all people into this. She has no idea how he found them, and panic starts building in her chest as he looks around the bar.
Shauna and the others still haven’t seen him. They’ve commandeered a large circular booth and Jackie has the clearest view of the door. She’s trying to figure out how to get away and get him out without anyone noticing, when Jeff makes a beeline straight for their table. Jackie braces herself for some kind of confrontation, but Jeff isn’t even looking at her. His eyes are locked on Shauna, who is still somehow blissfully ignorant even as a hush travels along the table.
Shauna is waving her hands and talking animatedly to Lottie next to her when Jeff pointedly clears his throat. Shauna doesn’t react at all, continuing to explain the worldbuilding in some new fantasy series she thinks Lottie would like. Jeff shifts on his feet awkwardly, all eyes on him except the ones he came for.
“Hey, uh, Shauna?” Shauna’s eyes shoot up at the sound of his voice, a scowl instantly making its way across her lips.
“What?” she asks sharply. Jackie has to make a concentrated effort to stifle her giggles. She’d always gotten the impression that Jeff saw Shauna as his star-crossed lover, while Shauna’s view of him was much less romantic.
They had talked about Jeff while they reconnected. Jackie had needed to know why Shauna did what she did, needed to be sure that Shauna would never hurt her that way again before they could truly get back to being best friends. In the end, Jeff had been a footnote in a series of lengthy discussions about their falling out. It was much deeper than some mediocre boy and they both knew it, deep down. Jackie needed to get used to giving up some control, needed to trust that Shauna wanted to be with her and that she didn’t need to hold on so tight. Shauna had needed to know that Jackie would listen to her, and she needed to be willing to actually open up and be honest about her feelings. When it came to Jeff, Shauna admitted that it had never been about him, and that Jackie was much better in bed, and that had been about it.
Now, seeing Jeff again is much less painful than Jackie would have expected. He just looks sad and dopey. He swallows nervously at Shauna’s glare and Jackie’s amusement and the team’s varying levels of interest. On one end is Mari, smiling viciously, not even bothering to hide the fact that she would be eating popcorn if she had any. Then there’s Van, who is leaning forward like she’s planning to leap over the table at the slightest hint of danger. Melissa is in a similar position, eyes darting from Van to Jeff like she’s waiting for a signal. On the other end is Lottie who isn’t even paying attention, choosing to lean into Laura Lee’s side and whisper in her ear. Jackie is suddenly curious about what she’s saying. It’s bound to be more interesting than Jeff, and Jackie has never seen Laura Lee turn that particular shade of red before.
She’s still tilting her head thoughtfully, trying in vain to read Lottie’s lips when Jeff speaks again. “Do you think we could talk privately?”
Jackie’s eyes whip back to him, glare in full force. He doesn’t get to go anywhere with her Shauna. Not after what happened the last time they were alone together. Jackie trusts Shauna implicitly now, but she can’t stand the thought of Jeff getting even one more second of her undivided attention.
Luckily, Shauna seems to be on the same page. “I’m really busy Jeff, just say whatever it is here. I’ll tell everyone what you say either way, might as well save my breath.”
Jeff gulps at that, eyes travelling across their little group, skipping over Jackie, before settling back on Shauna. Then, abruptly, he falls to one knee and pulls out a plain silver ring with a small diamond.
Some of the girls gasp, a few groan, and there are some giggles, but Jackie’s eyes are locked on Shauna’s reaction. She looks bored, eyes barely flitting towards the ring before watching Jeff’s face.
“I heard that you and Jackie were getting like, friend married,” Jeff is nervous, Jackie can tell. His words run together and trip over each other as he tries to get them all out. Mari has gotten out her phone and is recording the entire interaction, camera going from Jeff to Shauna to Jackie and back. She reaches across Akilah to slap Gen’s arm, gesturing for her to record the trainwreck from another angle. Jackie can’t help but find their antics amusing even as her blood boils at Jeff’s little speech. “I figured maybe you thought you had lost your chance at love. I thought that too for a long time, but maybe we haven’t. I keep thinking about those nights we had together, and I know you think about them too. We can have even more if you marry me?”
Shauna’s face has gone from impassive to incredulous. She’s staring at Jeff like she’s never seen a bigger idiot in her life. He’s still smiling hopefully at her, but it’s waning the longer Shauna takes to respond. Jackie knows for a fact that Shauna rarely thinks of her time with Jeff, and when she does, it’s incredibly distressing. She’s even had moments where she’s desperate for Jackie to erase it all, to touch her until Jackie is the only thing she feels. Jackie has to bite her tongue. She wants to tear Jeff a new one, but Shauna can handle herself.
Jackie’s ready for Shauna to use her big English brain to rip Jeff to shreds, is already planning on asking Mari to send her a copy of the footage. In the end, Shauna just looks back at the ring for a split second before looking Jeff in the eyes and saying, “No.”
He’s still on one knee, mouth agape, when Shauna turns to Van to bring up a new point in some debate about the last Lord of the Rings movie that they had been having for months now. Van keeps one eye on Jeff but gamely plays along by disputing Shauna’s points and keeping the conversation going.
Jackie doesn’t bother to stifle her laughter anymore, and Mari follows suit. Gen even gives him the finger as Jeff starts to get up, dejected. When Melissa starts to mime punching him, Jackie gets an idea.
“Let me walk you out,” she says. Shauna’s head whips towards Jackie, and she just offers her most encouraging look, asking Shauna to trust her. Shauna smiles slightly and nods, and Jackie is hit with such a strong wave of love. There were years that they spent apart, years that taught Jackie that no one would ever know her the way Shauna did. The bone deep knowing that means they never need words to communicate. She’ll never stop being grateful to have it back.
Jeff nods to Jackie as he stands, eying her with a mix of confusion and wariness. Jackie just smiles placidly as she grabs his arm to drag him out.
Once they’re outside the building, Jeff looks around uncomfortably, hand rubbing the back of his neck. “I guess this is goodbye, then.”
Jackie watches Jeff for a moment, letting him stew in his discomfort. He looks the same as he did a decade ago, but suddenly Jackie can see him clearly. He’s nothing. Getting the chance to touch Shauna Shipman was the best thing that had ever happened to him and nothing even close will ever happen again. Jackie gets to touch Shauna every day for the rest of their lives. The last bit of jealousy she felt towards Jeff evaporates like smoke. She hates him still, she always will. Not because he touched Shauna, but because Shauna made him a weapon to hurt them both, and he had let her.
As Jeff starts looking around for an escape, having met his threshold for awkward interactions, Jackie winds her leg back and kicks him in the balls. Jeff drops like a sack of potatoes while Jackie continues smiling.
“That was goodbye,” Jackie says jovially. It’s less than he deserves, but Jackie figures any more might put her behind bars. She knows how to pick her battles, and that felt like a suitable punishment for now. Proposing to someone at their own engagement party is a new low, even for him. And he never should’ve considered proposing to Shauna at all. He should be nothing but a nightmare to her by now.
Jackie walks back inside while Jeff is still whining on the ground. She feels more ready than ever to start this new chapter with Shauna. As Shauna looks over at the sound of the door, her face breaks out into the specific smile that she reserves solely for Jackie. Her cheeks bunch up and her nose scrunches slightly, and Jackie feels nothing but warmth.
“So,” Jackie starts, sliding back into her seat before kissing Shauna’s cheek. “What did I miss?”
Shauna puts an arm around her shoulders, pulling Jackie close as Van and Mel animatedly recount their latest FIFA match. Jackie tries to get even closer, wiggling into Shauna’s side, but she knows they’ll never be close enough. She looks at her ring, then at Shauna’s gold band on her shoulder, content with the knowledge that they’ll be as close as they can be soon enough.
*****
They decided not to put up decorations for the wedding, instead putting it all into the reception. Initially, Jackie had considered having a gazebo constructed or a giant arch, maybe setting up some kind of platform. In the end, she had realized that it wasn’t necessary. They were getting married in the same backyard they had grown up in together. It was where they had practiced kicking for hours before trying out for the soccer team. It was where they had learned to do cartwheel and summersaults. They played tag and catch and dug for buried treasure. They had constructed entire worlds between the two large trees that made up the property border. They don’t need anything else.
Momma S is standing in the center of the yard, watching with barely concealed amusement as Gen saunters down the makeshift aisle, throwing petals in every direction. She looks like she’s trying out for America’s Next Top Model, smize and all. Melissa walks behind her, eyes locked on Gen and hat held solemnly between her hands. The others are already in their positions. Melissa joins Tai, Van, and Lottie on Shauna’s side. Gen goes to Nat, Laura Lee, and Misty on Jackie’s side.
Mari and Akilah are moving around, getting into position to take pictures from multiple angles. Kristen is standing next to the sliding back door, boombox held in her arms, waiting for her cue to start the music. As soon as the back door opens, she hits the play button and “2 Become 1” by the Spice Girls blasts through the yard. Jackie can’t help but drop her head into her hands as the opening lines start. She had a bad feeling when Kristen asked to choose the song, but Jackie has never been good at saying no to people.
She can see out the kitchen window as Shauna’s head shoots back in bewilderment when she recognizes the song, too. The others do a valiant job of hiding their amusement, only the smallest quirks of lips getting through. Misty is swaying to the music and shooting Kristen a thumbs up.
Jackie decides to ignore the slight setback, even as Momma S starts turning red when the lyrics set in. Instead, she watches Shauna walk across the yard. It’s ground they’ve walked on hundreds of times, but this feels worlds different. Shauna looks so handsome in her white suit. Finding it had been dumb luck, a jacket with a pattern that matches Jackie’s dress perfectly. They’d had to get it tailored to fit properly, but it was so worth it. It’s yet another way that they get to be connected.
Shauna gets to her designated spot and turns to look at the door expectantly. Jackie sucks in a sharp intake of breath as she realizes what that means. It’s her turn. She shakes her head, trying to force herself into action, and smooths out her dress. It’s shorter than she originally planned, coming just below her knees, but once they settled on a backyard wedding, Jackie knew she’d rather avoid grass stains. It has long sleeves and a neckline that ends just below her collarbones. The biggest draw, though, are the lace flowers all along the fabric. They look like poppies, and Jackie fell in love as soon as she saw them.
Jackie rubs her hands on the fabric nervously as she makes her way to the door. She had been telling herself that this wedding was no big deal. It’s just a fun day to look pretty and celebrate Shauna, two of her favorite things. It feels like a big deal now, though. It feels like the most important moment of her life. She slides the door back open slowly, feeling like a bear might jump out at her if she makes a sudden move.
As soon as she steps outside, all her worries vanish. Shauna’s eyes snap to Jackie instantly, and a smile lights up her face. She looks radiant and giddy, hands clenching and unclenching in a way that Jackie knows means she’s trying to contain herself. Jackie is still a few feet away when Shauna reaches a hand out and starts walking forward to meet her just that little bit sooner. Taissa has to grab the back of her jacket and pull her back to her spot and Jackie laughs at the glare Shauna shoots behind her in response.
Once Jackie reaches her position, Shauna’s hands shoot back out to grip both of Jackie’s tightly. She’s swaying forward like she wants nothing more than to kiss her and Jackie wants nothing more than to let her. Before they can, though, Momma S clears her throat.
“Dearly beloved,” she starts, before looking between Jackie and Shauna. Whatever she sees prompts a short laugh to burst out before she continues. “I had a whole speech planned, but it doesn’t look like you girls have the patience for it today. I think for all of our sanity, we can skip right to the vows. Jackie, do you want to start?”
Jackie startles out of her Shauna Trance at the prompt, shaking her head to clear thoughts of kissing and touching and everything she very much should not be thinking about in front of their closest friends and family. She smiles shyly at Shauna before reaching into her bra for the neatly folded piece of paper with her vows. Nat is chuckling behind her as she whips it out and holds it up triumphantly. Shauna is just watching her with the softest smile on her face.
Jackie had wanted to memorize her vows, had even gotten tips from Kristen about “getting off-book” but in the end, she decided she couldn’t trust herself to remember anything with Shauna standing across from her. The decision ended up being a good one because her mind is completely blank right now. Her caveman brain just repeating the words Shauna pretty wife.
She has to keep her eyes locked on her paper, the words swimming momentarily as the overwhelming love she always feels around Shauna is made a million times more intense.
“I’ve just always been amazed by you. You’re this gorgeous badass who is so unapologetic about going after what you want, and I think you’re the coolest person that’s ever existed. To be honest, I had a really hard time figuring out what to say today. I knew I wanted to write something for you, because you’ve written so many incredible things for me. But what I feel for you is so beyond words. It’s just part of me, everything I feel for you exists in every piece of me. Sometimes, I feel like I was born to love you, like it’s all I really know how to do, and I’m just so ridiculously happy that I get to spend my entire life doing just that. It’s taken some time, and we had a lot to overcome, but I’ve learned that the only thing more inevitable than death is the two of us. You and me. So, get ready for a lifetime and more, because I know even death won’t do us part. I love you, and I’m so excited to be your wife.”
A little sob breaks Jackie away from her laser focus on the paper in her hands, she looks up in alarm to see Shauna full on crying. The only thing that keeps Jackie from spiraling is the fact that she’s still smiling genuinely. Shauna starts to lean forward, eyes locked on Jackie’s lips when she’s suddenly jerked back.
“Should’ve put a leash on her,” Tai tries to say it quietly, but in the silence of the backyard, it rings out loud and clear. Shauna starts pouting, eyes still burning into Jackie’s lips and Jackie can’t help her giddy laugh. Tai has the decency to look a little sheepish, but she keeps her hand firmly on the collar of Shauna’s jacket.
Nat’s hand reaches over to snatch Jackie’s paper, and Jackie looks back quickly, worried about what she might do. Today was supposed to be an unofficial truce, but maybe Natalie just wanted to keep her from suspecting anything. Nat just gives her a comforting smile as she passes the page back to Laura Lee who places it gently inside a notebook she had been carrying. Jackie relaxes immediately, offering Nat an apologetic smile for assuming the worst. Nat nods back in acknowledgement and it feels like progress. They can agree to disagree, and they’ll always be there for each other when it really matters.
Jackie is brought out of the thought by a small grunt behind her. When she faces forward again, Shauna looks one second away from trying to lunge for Jackie. Tai has loosened her grip and Jackie can see Shauna weighing the pros and cons before Momma S holds her hand out and says, “Shauna? Your vows?”
Shauna’s head jerks towards her, like she’s just remembering that her mom is right there as she desperately tries to kiss Jackie. She wilts a little, looking away in embarrassment and now Jackie is the one struggling not to kiss her. Shauna straightens back up, shaking Tai’s hand off easily, and looks back into Jackie’s eyes. She offers Jackie a small smile, just one corner of her mouth lifting, before she starts speaking.
“I love you, Jackie. I’ve loved you from the first moment you took my hand and asked me to play princesses with you. I messed up your whole plan,” Shauna smiles self-deprecatingly. “You wanted us to rule kingdoms and find princes to marry, but I insisted on being a dragon instead. I was supposed to keep you in your tower, safe and sound until someone came to save you. But when some boy ran up, wanting to be your knight, you sent him away. You said, ‘Who needs a knight when I have a dragon?’,” Shauna’s eyes shimmer with the memory. Schoolyard joy becoming something sacred over the years. “That was the moment I knew I’d never need anything else as long as I had you. I forgot that along the way, and it will always be my greatest regret. I will spend the rest of my life honoring you and taking care of you and making sure you never have even a moment to doubt how intensely you are loved. I’ll always be your dragon, and I’ll make sure you never need anything else. It’s just you and me against the world.”
Jackie had forgotten that story. She remembered first meeting Shauna, and thinking she would make a good princess, but the rest of the details had gotten lost somewhere. She can’t believe Shauna remembered it all. She smiles as she sees Shauna start to lean forward a little, Tai’s hand already shooting out to stop her. She supposes not much has really changed. Shauna’s still impulsive, rushing in and destroying Jackie’s carefully made plans. And Jackie always ends up grateful for it. They always turn out better in the end.
“Well,” Momma S is watching them both fondly as tears glisten in her eyes. “There’s only one thing left to do before Taissa can release the kraken,” Shauna gives her a look that can only be described as betrayed, and Jackie tries in vain to hide her giggles. Shauna definitely hears a few of them slipping out, and she softens as her eyes fall back on Jackie. Momma S continues like nothing had happened. “Melissa, the rings.”
Mel perks up like a puppy dog from her position off to the side. She rushes forward, hat held out carefully. Inside the hat is a small pillow with two rings sitting on top. Shauna had wanted to get Jackie a fancy wedding ring to make up for the unofficial engagement ring, but Jackie had refused. She had grown a soft spot for the little Bee and couldn’t imagine wearing anything else.
Shauna had only wanted a plain gold band. The larger, more ostentatious rings tended to get in the way when she was trying to write. She told Jackie she wanted something she wouldn’t have to take off, and Jackie had looked everywhere for the best ring. The one she chose had no stones, but the gold was carved with a design that reminded Jackie of a laurel wreath. She knew as soon as she saw it that it’d be perfect for Shauna.
Melissa bows in front of them, holding the ring hat slightly above her head. Shauna is broken out of yet another rabid reach for Jackie by the absurdity of it. Everyone is silent for a moment, confused by the presentation. Gen is the one to pull them out of it, saying “Marry each other already, don’t make her stay like that all day.”
Momma S brushes past the pause with incredible grace. “Shauna, will you take Jackie as your lawfully wedded wife; to have and to hold, in sickness and in health, for richer or for poorer, as long as you both shall live?”
Shauna grabs the Bee ring as she says, “I do.”
“Then repeat after me. With this ring, I thee wed.”
Jackie holds her left hand out, and Shauna grabs it with her own shaking hand. She struggles to keep steady as she slides the ring onto Jackie’s finger. “With this ring, I thee wed.”
Her voice is shaking too, and Jackie feels something click into place, deep inside herself, as the ring gets to the base of her finger. She grabs Shauna’s ring and shoves it onto her finger before Momma S can say anything else, rushing to say, “With this ring I thee wed” before she lunges forward to kiss Shauna.
Shauna meets her eagerly, relieved to finally be able to kiss Jackie like she’d been trying to all day. The world is silent around them for a moment before someone, probably Laura Lee, cheers loudly. The rest soon follow suit, and Jackie feels Shauna’s lips fighting to turn up through their kiss. She feels Shauna everywhere. It’s like she’s being destroyed and remade all over, every atom reshaping to make something new. Jackie Taylor is gone now, and Jackie Shipman is all that remains.
She pulls back, smiling at the dreamy look on Shauna’s face. She looks drunk with love, and Jackie is absolutely obsessed. That’s her wife! The words repeat in Jackie’s head until she forgets everything else.
Akilah is the one to break them out of the mini trance they’d entered. “Hey, I’m going to help Kristen get set up at the reception hall, I’ll see you there.”
She gives Jackie a pat on the shoulder and Shauna a playful salute before racing off, Mari trailing behind, hunched over her camera.
Everyone else seems to take that as their cue to head out as well, offering hugs or fist bumps as they head out in smaller groups. Then, it’s just Jackie and Shauna, smiling at each other giddily.
“How soon do you think they’ll expect us to be there?” Shauna asks eagerly, eyes flitting to her old bedroom window.
Jackie pretends to think about it, tapping her index finger against her chin before saying, “Probably pretty soon. Why, did you have something you wanted to do?”
“Yeah, you,” Shauna grabs her as she says it, racing forwards towards the door to the house. Jackie squeals in shock, but it gets cut off as she’s thrown over Shauna’s shoulder and all the air is knocked out of her lungs.
Shauna starts laughing maniacally and can’t keep her momentum going as she tries to start going up the stairs. She ends up sliding Jackie down in front of her so Jackie is on the bottom step, slightly above her.
“We don’t really have to do anything,” Shauna is quick to assure. “But I would really like to fuck my wife now, if that’s something you’d be interested in.”
Jackie has to lean down slightly to put her mouth right next to Shauna’s ear. She feels Shauna take in a deep breath, bracing herself. Jackie stays there for a moment, letting every exhale hit the shell of Shauna’s ear, before yelling “Race you!” and turning around to sprint up the steps.
Shauna practically growls as she starts running after Jackie, catching her a few stairs from the top and accidentally tackling her in front of the landing. Shauna manages to get an arm between Jackie and the stairs, so the damage is minimal. They stay still for a moment, catching their breath, before Shauna starts apologizing profusely. Jackie can’t help but laugh.
To stop Shauna’s endless fretting, Jackie turns her head just enough to kiss her. It was meant to be something quick and reassuring, to just say “stop apologizing dummy”. But then, Jackie feels Shauna’s tongue at the same moment the hand below her moves onto her chest. Suddenly, the kiss is a lot more involved than Jackie had planned and she is very sure they’re going to be late to their own wedding reception. As her hand moves back to tangle in Shauna’s hair, pulling slightly just to hear her groan, Jackie decides everyone else can wait. They’ll make their apologies later.
*****
Walking into the reception hall is like the walk of shame times ten. Everyone is giving them knowing looks and eye rolls as they walk through. Shauna had changed into her usual flannel and jeans combo, hair hanging down in an attempt to cover the numerous hickeys Jackie had left. A few years ago, she would’ve felt awful for marking Shauna so much. Now, she knows she has nothing to feel bad about. Even if her skin crawls a little at the thought of Momma S seeing them all.
Jackie changed into a polo shirt and jeans, the shirt she picked out is the same color as Shauna’s flannel and if anyone asks, it was completely coincidental. Shauna had given her a knowing look when Jackie pulled it on, but Shauna knows her better than anyone. Jackie is confident no one else with catch on. She had considered popping the collar to hide her own marks, but it had made her look like a tiny frat boy. Shauna couldn’t stop laughing at her so Jackie had to smooth it down again. Her hair isn’t long enough to hide her neck anymore, ending just below her jaw, so Jackie had to spend some extra time putting concealer on. It only added to their tardiness, but Jackie still stands by their decision, it was 100% worth it.
Kristen is hanging out near the stage with Misty, swinging her microphone in a figure eight as she talks. Jackie makes a beeline for them, keeping a wide berth from the swinging metal. Kristen perks up as soon as she spots Jackie, clearly impatient for her solo. Jackie just nods, and Kristen is taking the stage before she can blink.
Shauna is hovering behind Jackie, never far out of reach, and Jackie turns to smile at her, offering a hand as the music starts to play. Shauna immediately pulls Jackie forward and starts spinning her at an almost dangerous speed. Kristen adds her voice to the music and Jackie is transported. Her voice isn’t exactly like Dusty Springfield’s, but it’s close enough when paired with the lyrics of “I Only Want to Be with You”. Those lyrics have been stuck in Jackie’s head since she first heard them. They echo whenever Shauna is in her vicinity, so she hears the song almost constantly except for those few years she didn’t hear it at all.
In Jackie’s mind, they are in the Shipman living room, spinning and laughing and feeling weightless. They are getting ready for a dance and instinctively putting the song on in the background. Shauna is humming the melody as Jackie cries over whatever awful insult her parents have come up with or when she feels completely empty and can’t understand why. They are singing wildly to each other, faces almost touching, and getting so close to something that they cannot name.
Then Jackie blinks and she’s back. She’s being dipped by Shauna at their wedding reception as their friend sings about wanting to spend each moment of the day together. Jackie has to add this moment to a rapidly growing list of perfect moments. All of them are with Shauna, and she knows in her bones she’s going to have a lifetime more.
When the last notes of Kristen’s song ring out, all their teammates are quick to pile onto the dance floor, smothering the two of them in a group hug. They don’t chant it, but Jackie can still hear “Buzz, buzz, buzz” anyways. She throws her head back and laughs, surrounded by everything she’s ever wanted.
The DJ steps in seamlessly, barely a moment of silence between Kristen’s voice and Freddie Mercury singing “Don’t Stop Me Now”. Between the DJ’s set, a few Yellowjackets give in and take the stage, accepting the open offer to sing.
Lottie starts strong with Whitney Houston’s “My Love is Your Love”, inviting everyone to sing the chorus along with her. Jackie practically screams it, feeling the words so strongly they reverberate inside her chest. Laura Lee shows off a level of theatricality they did not expect from her as she sings, Frankie Valli’s “Can’t Take My Eyes Off You”. She even slides on her knees to the end of the stage for the first “I love you baby”, Lottie meeting her at the edge like an eager groupie.
Van gets Tai to duet “Kiss from A Rose” with her, both of them disappearing into their own world by the end. They’re just holding each other and swaying, like it’s their first dance. Jackie’s betting they’ll officially be back together by the end of the night. Misty surprises them all with a heartfelt rendition of “Time After Time” and Nat sings “You Give Love a Bad Name”. Jackie chooses to believe it’s just Nat picking a fun song instead of any purposeful message.
The last song has Mari, Akilah, Gen, Melissa, and Kristen becoming the Spice Girls to sing “Wannabe”. It’s a complete disaster. Mari and Gen both clearly wanted to be Posh Spice, Kristen is trying to be Scary Spice, but the vibe is more a cast member from Cats the Musical. Melissa makes a very convincing Sporty Spice, but she starts taking it too seriously when she tries to cartwheel across the stage. Jackie’s just relieved she didn’t try to do a backflip. Akilah nails the adorable Baby Spice mannerisms, tilting her head innocently and waving around a lollipop she managed to find somewhere. She stays in character up until she has to jump in and mediate the brewing fight between the Poshes.
Before the song is even over, it’s devolved into a Posh-off with Mari and Gen strutting across the stage with their best pouts. Akilah obviously votes for Mari while Melissa remains loyal to Gen. That leads to Kristen, the lone swing vote, being catered to more and more intensely until she has two Posh Spices giving her a lap dance.
Jackie is trying to make out with Shauna as the screaming from the stage intensifies. She sighs, exasperated, and gets off Shauna’s lap to go use her Team Captain voice and shut it down. Reminding them that Ginger Spice exists only leads to more arguments over who would look better in a red wig and Jackie is close to the end of her rope when Shauna comes up behind her, head hooking over her shoulder.
“Okay, I think karaoke is done,” Shauna sounds stern, and the others open their mouths to argue until they look over to see Shauna’s face. She shouldn’t look intimidating, hanging all over Jackie, but Jackie knows exactly what face she’s making now. It’s her Serious Face complete with intense eyes, furrowed brow, and pursed lips. She looks like a mix between a disappointed mother and a predator waiting for an opportunity to strike. The Spice Girl Wannabes all dejectedly head off stage, Akilah offering a brief apologetic glance as she comforts Mari.
The DJ steps in quickly, cuing up “No Scrubs” by TLC and Jackie makes a mental note to tip them generously. Everyone rushes back to the dance floor. They had been run off by the earlier chaos, but the music draws them back in. Shauna and Jackie are still on stage, enjoying their own private dance floor. Shauna is quietly singing the lyrics into Jackie’s ear as they move to the music.
The moment leads to Jackie’s favorite picture of the night, Mari had broken out of her sulk just long enough to capture it. Jackie has her head thrown back in laughter, one foot firmly on the ground while the other is kicked out in front of her. Shauna is holding her from behind, keeping her stable, with her face close to Jackie’s ear and a wide smile making her look so carefree she’s almost unrecognizable. A few heads can be seen on the dance floor, but Jackie and Shauna are the only ones clearly visible. It’s just them and the banner behind them that reads “Best Friends Forever”.
All in all, the day was everything Jackie could have ever dreamed of. She’s still feeling floaty and drunk when she and Shauna crash into bed. They move closer to kiss, powerless to the bonds that hold them together, but before their lips can connect, Shauna yawns in Jackie’s face. Jackie scrunches her nose in surprise before giggling and moving back to see her wife’s face. Shauna’s eyes are half-lidded and unfocused, she looks insanely cute.
“Lay down, drunky,” Jackie’s voice is much too fond, but no one else is around to judge her for it. “We can consummate the marriage tomorrow.”
Shauna lets out a huff of air that could almost be a laugh. “I think our marriage can be considered consummated. The steps of my childhood home count, you know.”
“Does that mean our marital bed is a staircase?” Jackie pushes some of Shauna’s hair back, away from her face. Shauna leans back, stretching like a cat as Jackie’s pushing turns into petting.
Shauna’s eyes fall closed and Jackie thinks she’s fallen asleep until Shauna says, “Probably depends on your definition of marital bed. If anyone asks, this is it.”
Shauna pats the bed beneath them, nodding in satisfaction. She’s ridiculous and adorable and Jackie’s freaking wife. “Hey, Mrs. Shipman?”
Shauna’s eyes fly open at the title, smile growing as she responds, “Yes, Mrs. Shipman?”
“I love you,” Jackie shrugs as she says it, hand falling from Shauna’s hair. Shauna smiles her Jackie Smile, the one that never fails to melt Jackie’s heart.
“I love you, too,” Shauna says softly, eyes fluttering shut again. “Always.”
Jackie lies next to Shauna and watches her for a few minutes. Counting Shauna’s breaths always helped her sleep, sometimes it was the only thing that worked. As she gets to 51, Jackie’s eyes start slipping shut. The wedding had been a fairy tale, just like Shauna promised. And Jackie’s last thought before sleep claims her for the night is how lucky she is to have such a good friend.