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A Public Record frontpage article written by Alina Starkov:
Six of Foes? Jesper Fahey Spills Beans On Former Bandmates In Tell-All Podcast Episode
The tea isn’t just piping hot. It. Is. Boiling.
Five years have passed since infamous pop rock band The Crows have permanently split without so much as a clue of what might have caused the sudden break-up. The former band’s dedicated and still very much active fanbase has, over time, accumulated an array of conspiracies and theories, many of which suggest a disastrous falling-out between at least half of the group.
This theory is supported by the fact that Nina Zenik (pop icon and recent winner of the AMA album of the year award), Inej Ghafa (CEO of the Heart2Heart Foundation) and Wylan Van Eck (Composer for the New York Metropolitan Opera) are the only three ex-bandmates still occasionally spotted out and about together ever since Van Eck and Fahey suddenly ended their longtime relationship almost four years ago. In the meantime, former frontman and main-vocalist Kaz Brekker has been quietly growing his London-based record label, whilst Matthias Helvar (Keys) has permanently gone back to Fjerda, his Norwegian hometown. Neither of them have been spotted with the other members and have thus far refrained from publicly commenting on any band business.
Has there really been bad blood between most of the crows all this time? Well, it now seems like the answer is yes! And nobody is surprised that it turned out to be none other than Jesper Fahey – former The Crows drummer turned part-time actor in a superhero franchise with a history of erratic behaviour and substance abuse – to stir the rumour mill and break the silence for good.
Fahey’s career has been somewhat stagnant after the band’s break-up. Instead of committing to a single craft or endeavour like the rest of his former bandmates, the Irish artist first dipped his toes into modelling. Next, Fahey made his reality TV debut on Lust Conquers All, which – just like his simultaneous dalliances with fellow contestants Anne and Antony – didn’t last long. Afterwards, Fahey tried, and failed, to establish his gaming career on Twitch and, finally, like so many musicians with a moderate talent for remembering easy lines before him, recently decided to get into acting on a whim.
According to the video podcast host, Big Bolliger, who Public Record managed to interview after the episode aired, Fahey was the only ex-member who showed up after being invited to “Big Bolliger’s Celebrity and Film Bro Podcast” to talk about the band’s upcoming anniversary. And, seemingly determined to ruin his own career for a hot second of attention, Fahey did not hold back.
Here is a snippet of a particularly juicy part of the episode:
BEGIN TRANSCRIPTION.
Bolliger: Has it been hard, finding your place and purpose after suddenly being on your own, without the support of your former bandmates?
Fahey: Not particularly, to be honest with you, mate. I’ve always had so many talents and way too much energy for my own good, d’you know what I mean? So, to me, finally being on my own felt like a liberation of sorts. Like I was finally able to try out all of the things I’ve been wanting to do for so long, but couldn’t.
Bolliger: Yeah, mate. I feel you. Do you keep up with their successes at all? I’ve heard that Wylan-
Fahey: Not really, actually. I wish them all the best, obviously. But right now, I’m just trying to focus on my own stuff.
Bolliger: So you really haven’t been following any of them? I mean some of them, don’t get me wrong, are kind of hard not to keep up with. There’s Nina, for instance. Her solo career is blowing up at the moment.
Fahey: Really? That’s news to me, mate. Good for her though. It’s nice to know that I’m not the only one with a solid career going on.
Bolliger: Sure.
Fahey: Aren’t you gonna ask me about the new movie, Bol?
Bolliger: Um, yeah, sure! Totally, mate. Umm . . . How did you find working with the infamous Nikolai Lantsov?
Fahey: It was great, man. I mean, have you seen those guy’s abs? *laughs* Watching that guy do his own stunts . . . Mental, I tell you! It actually inspired me to do my own stunts as well.
Bolliger: Will you reprise your role as Slingshot?
Fahey: Totally! And I’m also really hoping to get Slingshot a stand-alone movie. That would be sick. Maybe we can get the band back together afterwards but I think it’s time for a little Slingy solo action, if you know what I mean.
Bolliger: Speaking of getting the band back together- Can you tell us what we’re all dying to know? Is there any chance of The Crows ever reuniting?
Fahey: Nah, I highly doubt it. To be honest with you, mate, I’m the only one who could bring the band back together and, right now, I don’t really feel like doing that.
Bolliger: Why? If you don’t mind sharing.
Fahey: Nah, that’s alright. I don’t really care what they think of me anymore. *hesitates* The thing is . . . I carried that band. Without me the band wouldn't have even been formed, I mean – take Kaz and Inej for instance. They’re so deeply repressed, oh my fucking god. Without me, they wouldn't have even talked to each other back when it was still just the three of us. Jesus. I mean, I was the only one able to carry a normal fucking conversation. And suddenly it's Kaz’ band. Kaz, the great frontman, lyrical genius, mystery guy. All he’s good at is commanding people, looking good on stage and taking the credit of other people!
Bolliger: What do you mean by repressed?
Fahey: Just repressed man. There’s people that are open with their feelings and know how to communicate them and then there’s them.
Bolliger: So, are you suggesting that-
Fahey: No one’s as repressed as Kaz though. He’s deeply fucked up. You can’t fix someone like that. And it’s no fun trying. That’s all I’ll say.
Bolliger: So . . . the band broke up because of him? Is that what you’re saying?
Fahey: I see what you’re doing, Bol. *laughs* Using your manipulative, wicked journalism skills to get me to admit what caused the band to fall apart, eh? You sneaky little bastard. *continues laughing* You’re not getting your answer, mate. My lips are sealed.
END TRANSCRIPTION.
Here’s one thing to remember, kids: don’t do drugs. They make you delusional. Because, if anything is apparent, it’s that Jesper Fahey’s lips were anything but sealed throughout the entirety of that podcast episode.
Our heartfelt condolences go out to his PR team.