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Venti sat next to his statue, strumming his lyre softly as the gentle breeze careessed his cheek. Truly a wonderful feeling. No wonder Windrise is a favourite tourist attraction.
Then Venti waited.
And waited and waited.
And then waited again for his Archon colleagues friends to come like he had invited them so.
Venti dragged his feet to his usual seat in Angel's Share, right in front of the bartender — who today is actually the owner himself — and sighed.
Diluc shoved a drink to his face. Venti blinked, but took the wine immediately.
“On the house,” said the redhaired tycoon, busying himself with overwiping the overwiped glass.
“Thanks,” Venti said, staring at his reflection in the cup. Of a friend from bygone days. How he wished he could visit the lad yet again. If only he wasn't confined by his duties as an Archon...
!
“Master Diluc, you are a genius!” he yelled, lunging in for a hug but Diluc was faster at dodging physical affection.
“I'm aware,” he said drily, pushing the bard-god away. “Why the sudden compliment?”
And Venti grinned, boyish and chaotic.
“I'm going to leave Mondstadt for a while. You know, meeting with old friends.”
Diluc raised an eyebrow. “Old friends?” he echoed. “From the Seven Nations?”
Venti nodded.
Diluc paused before nodding. “I'll pass this on to Jean, maybe Kaeya if I don't see her,” he said, putting the overpolished glass back into it's shelf. “If you're setting off to Liyue by foot, then best you go now. You'll arrive exactly at sunrise.”
“Great then!” beamed the bard. “I can go bother Xiao as well!” He leaped from his seat and turned to wave at the tycoon. “Bye Master Diluc! Thanks for the wine!” And promptly left in a gust of wind.
Diluc waved at the door, face as blank as ever, though amusement danced in his eyes.
Zhongli was, contrary to popular belief, not as dense as he always (un)intentionally acted. Yes, he knew people thought he's broke (some even asked Hu Tao if she paid him for his services — to which she was greatly offended by and refused to speak to him until he bought her a custom made plushie resembling the ghost she always have on her side). No, he wasn't intentional is making people pay for him — and he does pay them back for their money. In favours or in something material.
(It's always Mora with Ningguang. Childe, though, would be satisfied with just having someone to talk to during lunch.)
So when he heard rumours that there's a young boy in green with the scent of dandelions and wine who was looking for "Mr. Zhongli", he knew something was amiss.
Amiss as in, he would be in danger trouble for a certain meeting he didn't attend in favour of babysitting accompanying Ganyu, Shenhe and Xiao on an outing with the coming Lantern Rite.
(Zhongli may or may not have paid Childe to send some of his Fatui men to sneak in some pictures of the three together. For future reference.)
So, with the threat trouble of handling a hyperactive old twat hanging above his head, Zhongli turns to the person he can trust the most with these kinds of things.
Childe blinked owlishly through his glasses, slowly setting down the paperworks he was holding and dipping the quill back into the ink.
“You want me to hide you?” the young Harbinger echoed his request. “I mean, I wouldn't say no — please make yourself comfortable in my office — but why?”
“An old friend is visiting and I would rather not deal with him at the moment.”
Childe blinked, the gears seemingly turning inside his head. “Which friend?” he asked.
Ah right. He does have the number of people one would call "friends".
“From Mondstadt,” Zhongli replied, then added with a satisfied smirk, “I heard your late co-worker did a number on him. I understand. Pity, we didn't have time to discuss about this friend when she was alive.”
Childe stared at him.
“Oh, my apologies,” said Zhongli, as if realizing something, “my condolences to you and the Tsaritsa.”
Childe blinked. “Uh, thanks? I'll be sure to send your kind words to Her Majesty...”
Zhongli nodded. “That would be lovely,” he smiled. He took a seat at the guest area, took a book out of his coat and began reading.
Childe stared for a moment, sighing and wondering what kind of bullshit did he get himself into, and resumed his calculations of this month's fiscal before Pantalone came to eat his head off.
Venti had to say — being treated like a lost child all the time was starting to get on his nerves.
They wouldn't let him drink! They denied the God of Wine of drinks! How preposterous is that?!
Venti came here to drag the old clown out for quality company time but now. Now it's a personal matter.
In the many forms that Rex Lapis liked to use, the form of a young adult male was his favourite, a child being his least. So that means he can vouch for his age!
Ningguang blinked. Who would be so blind as to not see her walking—
“Oh,” she looked down. This person was quite short. “Apologies. I did not see you there.”
“Evidently,” muttered the young boy, much to her displeasure. But Ningguang has a soft spot for kids, so he's fine. For now. “I apologize as well, ma'am.”
Ningguang nodded. “Are you perhaps from Mondstadt?” she glanced at the Vision on his hip — an Anemo Vision with a pretty ornament hanging on it.
He caught her eyes and nodded. “Yes! I'm Venti, the most popular bard in Mondstadt! I came here to visit a friend,” he frowned, “unfortunately, I haven't been able to track him down.”
A friend? “I'm Ningguang, the Tianquan of the Liyue Qixing. If he lives in the harbor, I might know of him.”
Venti stared at her for a minute before blinking. “Then,” he smiled, “do you perhaps know of a Mr. Zhongli? That's the name he uses these days. I heard he's working at a mortuary as a consultant.”
Childe almost cussed the living hell out of Ekaterina when she knocked the door to his office.
(The Fatui might be this big, evil corporation who may or may not secretly be atheists, but even they have workplace safety and regulations. Also activities. Childe is determined to win "Best Harbinger of the Year" again.)
“Ekaterina,” he hissed, forcing a smile, “what's the problem?”
(A lot, he wanted to say. Math sucks and Pantalone can suck Dottore's dick with all these damn interests and compounds.)
(He was supposed to be the damn vanguard, second only to Capitano. But nooo, give the guy who never finished school the job of an accountant.)
(Whoever decided that he should be the Minister of Government Development instead of Defence is an asshole. Pulcinella might be nice to him but Childe isn't stupid enough to know that he has ulterior motives. So, sincerely fuck off.)
Ekaterina looked as underpaid as always. With dead eyes, she said, “The Tianquan wished to see you,” she glanced at Mr. Zhongli, “should I redirect her instead?”
Glaring a little at the former Archon (who was nonchalantly sipping on his tea), he waved her off. “No, send her in.”
What the hell does she want to talk about anyways? It's not like he hadn't give her a generous sum (though certainly not enough to rival her wealth) that should more than cover the expenses of recuperation on the harbor. He had even helped an agent of theirs — Yelan, was it? Very gorgeous woman, but also very weird. He wished she could cover some of her... assets.
Ningguang walked in with the grace and proudness of a peacock, as usual, but this time there's a young... girl? Boy? Kid. A kid that screams green with dakr blue hair and green tips on his two braid that somehow reminds him of—
Mr. Zhongli loudly groaned.
“See?” Ningguang winked, “I knew he'd be here.”
“You came all this way to get this guy?” Tartaglia motioned to Mr. Zhongli exasperatedly. She would have pitied him a little had he not made her drown her best friend. Suck ass.
“Old man!” Venti tackled Mr. Zhongli, though the latter was fast enough to conjure a shield made of Geo, which the former landed face first into.
Mr. Zhongli kept ignoring the bard.
Sulking, Venti looked around. His eyes caught Tartaglia (huh, who would've thought she'd be alive to see the fight-crazed Harbinger sitting down doing... fiscals. Heh).
“Oh, Mr. Harbinger!” he waved. “Nice to meet you. I'm Venti, the most popular bard in Mondstadt! Your friend — I believe her name was Rosalyne? Signora? — yeah, she gave me quite the scare, but all's fine! How's she doing these days?”
Tartaglia actually stilled. He leaned against the table. “Uh, she died, unfortunately.”
Ningguang paused. Quite unfortunate indeed.
Venti also paused, face solemn, almost mourning. Though there's something else mixed in there — regret? What could a cute bard such as he have to do with a Fatui Harbinger?
“That's... quite unfortunate, yes,” he nodded solemnly. “Alas, death comes for everyone. May I ask if she died with honor in your service?”
Tartaglia nodded. “Yes. We managed to strangle a day off for her passing from the Mayor.”
“Ei,” Mr. Zhongli spoke.
Venti paused. He blinked. “Ei?”
Mr. Zhongli nodded. “Ei.”
“Huh,” Venti said, though there's a small hint of anger in behind his eyes. It quickly faded though.
“Enough with the somber talk,” the bard jumped in his feet, “you! Why didn't you come to Windrise? I invited you!”
“With winds,” Mr. Zhongli said bitterly, placing his cup down, “you ruined my hair when your winds "whispered" the invitation to me.”
Venti flinched. “They can uh, be a bit mischievous. Sorry,” he said. “But that doesn't mean you don't have to attend! It's a get-together!”
“Unlike you,” Mr. Zhongli glared, “I have a job. I can't leave Liyue so carelessly.”
“Oh please,” Venti rolled his eyes, “that director of yours only needs you once in a blue moon anyways. You're just making excuses.”
“Can we please take this away from my office?” Tartaglia sighed, and she just noticed how tired he looked. All the times she's seen him, he looked as energetic as a hyperactive child given sugar rush.
Unfortunately for him, nobody heard him aside from her.
He sighed, glanced at her, and aimed his fingers. Ningguang summoned her Jade Screen. Tartaglia sprayed the two bickering men with Hydro.
“Get out,” he said, before collapsing to the floor.
Ningguang was about to call for one of the agents to hurry and get a doctor, but one already came in, looking even more tired than her boss, and carried him like a bride.
“He's always like this,” she informed, dead tired, “did all the paperworks in one go. Haven't eaten or sleep for three days. Weird how he can survive so long like that in the Abyss but not when doing paperworks.”
She left.
Ningguang took that as her cue.
“Do we get Ei first or Nahida?”
Zhongli downed his fifth bottle of Fire Water (a gift from Childe a few weeks back). “I met her Grand Sage a few months back,” he said, “he told me she would like to travel by sea one day.”
“We could do that when we visit Inazuma for a second time,” said the bard nonchalantly. A second time...
Zhongli sighed.
“Is he okay?” asked Kazuha, a young man who actually parried Ei's killer move, frowning at Zhongli as he hung upside down on the watchtower.
“Archons, Kazuha!” yelled Sea Drake from below, “I know you got a Vision and all, but have some self preservation!”
Kazuha simply smiled from his upside down position.
“Wanna do a trick?” Venti asked. Kazuha grinned.
Kazuha did a backflip and used Anemo to jump midair, then Venti pushed him back with Anemo as well and he jumped midair again so he landed on the highest watchtower.
Captain Beidou clicked her tongue. “Anemo users,” she grunted. Then, she howled back, “If you're up there then give us a boost instead of playing jump!”
Both he and Kazuha laughed before moving the sails with Anemo.
Contrary to popular belief (read: Miko, Traveler and the flying thing), Ei could socialize. She just prefers not to, was all.
So, as an effort to reintegrate back into learn about the society as part of her new efforts to be an actually good Archon, she sometimes don on Makoto's kimono (which may or may not have delayed her by an hour because she was crying her eyes out), tied her hair in a manner unrecognisable by the people, don a counterfeit Vision (that was confiscated during the Vision Hunt Decree) and just, walk around.
Sure, she still drew attention, but her people had been warm and accepted her excuse of being a wandering swordswoman.
So, when she bumped into the person that laze around all day drinking wine and the person that faked his death and singlehandedly made the entire continent suffer economic issues (Morax can go suck ass. She's so tired of the reports from the Tri-commission complaining about this shit), she didn't expect them to recognise her.
(Ei is a self aware person — at least after her "character development", as Miko would put it. She knew that no one would expect her to be open to change, much less changing something about herself, as per her divine ideal. Her fellow Archons were no different.)
“Oh wow,” the puny bard laughed, “you actually did what old man over here said you would.”
“I know I was right,” Morax, the bastard, looked smug for some damn reason, “I saw how she would look at the harbor everytime she visits.”
“What do you want?” Ei spat, crossing her arms.
“Let's go get Nahida!” Barbatos giggled. “We're going on a holiday! Company sponsored.”
“I thought we all quit,” she said. Barbatos might have made it look like he had no idea about the Cryo Archon wanting his Gnosis, but she knew him better, longer. Morax, on the other hand, caused an economical disaster by handing his over. She didn't care, but she heard Miko gave it to... huh.
Wait a second.
To who?
It was definitely a Harbinger, but she killed the woman. That's the only recorded Harbinger to ever come inside Inazuma during the whole debacle. Who got the Gnosis?
Now that she think about it, a lot of things didn't make sense. She remembered some events even inside her plane, but from what she heard from the people, it was different.
She remembered getting a message from the Kaedehara Clan, from someone important. But that person couldn't possibly...
“Sure,” she said. Barbatos looked schocked. Morax didn't even care — he was buying dango for them.
“What?”
“I said yes,” she repeated. “I'll go to the Yashiro Commission to explain my absence to Miko and the rest of the Tri-commission. We'll go then.”
Ayato choked on his bubble tea when the door to his office slammed open by—
“Glory to the Almighty Narukami,” he immediately bowed. What the fuck.
“Stand down,” the Shogun waved her hand. “I'll be quick — I will be away on personal reasons for a while. I don't know when I'll be back, but it won't be too long. Tell the Guuji and the other commissioners of my absence.”
Ayato blinked. What the hell.
“Sure, yeah,” he blurted before his brain could think. Fuck. “Can I ask why me?” The Tenryou Commsion is literally the building next to Tenshukaku. Why the hell him?
“You're the only one who didn't collaborate with the Fatui during the Vision Hunt Decree,” she said. “Can you do it?”
“Of course,” he said. “Do you need anything for your journey?”
She shook her head. “No need,” she paused, then glared at the door. “Actually, can you let me borrow some Mora? You can ask the amount I owe you from Miko after this.”
“Sure,” he nodded. Thoma suddenly walked in holding a sack of Mora. Huh. Was he listening in?
“Here you go,” Thoma shakily handed the bag of Mora to the Shogun with a forced smile. She nodded and muttered a thank you — he caught Thoma shuddering.
“I will take my leave now,” she said, “Guuji Yae shall be in charge while I am away.”
He nodded. “Of course. Have an enjoyable trip, Almighty Shogun.”
The door closed.
Ayato screamed.
“Why didn't you tell me Kaedehara Kazuha would be here?” hissed Ei as she glanced at Venti and the young Anemo allogene playing with the wind.
Zhongli shrugged. “I didn't know who he was either,” he said. He looked up — Kazuha smiled chillingly at them. “I think he knew who you are.”
“Obviously,” she rolled her eyes. “He's been staring at me the whole time. I thought dressing up as Makoto would throw him off.”
He blinked at her. “You're twins,” he stated.
“And?”
“Are you guys alright?” Captain Beidou walked towards them. “You okay, Mr. Zhongli?”
Zhongli coughed a bit but nodded his head. “Indeed. Please thank Miss Yinxing for the medicine she gave me.”
“Medicine?” Ei absolutely had to ask. To her credit, she looked a bit concerned.
“Mr. Zhongli's here seasick,” the captain laughed. “Wouldn't have guessed it since he worked at a funeral parlor.”
“I don't handle dead bodies,” he clarified. He glanced at Ei who was coughing uncontrollably.
“You didn't hear this from me, but the bard is allergic to cats.”
Ei cracked up.
“So what's your story, lady?” Huixing, clearly drunk, asked loudly. “Ain't no way a pretty lady like you is just a swordswoman. You a runaway from some noble family?”
“Huixing,” Juza called. Ei shook her head.
“It's fine, nothing of the sorts,” she said. “I was a shrine maiden that worked very close with the Shogun, but I ran away when the Decree came to be. I met these two during my travels.”
“Is that so?“ a drunk Kaedehara Kazuha asked, pointedly.
Ei gave a pointed smile in return.
“How old are you?” Suling wiggled his eyebrows, which were met by her unamused stare. The man laughed. “All of you, actually.”
“I'm curious as well,” the captain added. “Mr. Zhongli over here is famous for being a walking encyclopedia I wanna make sure he ain't an adeptus!”
Morax — Zhongli, she supposed — awkwardly laughed. “I'm not,” he said, “I'm actually in my thirties.”
Venti snorted. “Yeah, in his thirties,” he giggled. “I'm past the drinking age. That's all I'll say.”
“What about you then, Ei?” Beidou asked.
“I'm twenty five,” Venti and the old man snorted. Fuck them.
“Man,” Juza, drunk already, moaned, “why do the young ones got the Visions?”
“Skill issue,” Kaedehara Kazuha spoke with a grin.
The night ended with him getting trampled by a few jealous people.
“Why are we here?” Ei looked around the cafe. It's cozy.
“We're meeting my friend,” said Zhongli.
“Dear me,” Venti gasped, “Zhongli have friends? Other than us?”
Ei knew for a fact that Zhongli could retort with something the twat couldn't fight back but she also knew that he didn't have the heart to say it, considering. So he just rolled his eyes.
Not even a second later, a young man, probably in his early twenties, walked in. He has a Dendro Vision attached to his coat on his left shoulder.
“Alhaitham,” Zhongli nodded. This Alhaitham nodded back.
“You said you wanted to meet Lady Kusanali?” he asked. Zhongli nodded. “Well, I'm not against that, but you have to go through her secretary first.”
“Secretary?” Venti asked. “I didn't know Sumeru had that kind of job.” He whispered to her, “Is it, you know, the Dendro Dragon?” Ei shrugged.
“Can I ask why do you want to meet her, though?” Alhaitham asked. “I need to have some ammunition to refute that suicidal narcissist.”
(Ei had no idea who this guy is but he should get some help if people are referring to him as a "suicidal narcissist".)
“A get-together!” Venti replied.
She looked at Zhongli. They book looked at the twat.
Alhaitham, for his part, looked unfazed by the implications that these fairly young looking people are friends with a god that was physically and mentally imprisoned in her own nation by her people who was only just rescued.
“Sure,” he nodded. “I'll lead you to the Sanctuary of Surasthana. Follow me.”
Wanderer blinked.
“Are you fucking kidding me?” he asked to nobody in particular because literally no one in this motherfucking continent could do anything right.
There she was. His mother — Raiden Ei herself, wearing the clothes of her late sister (whom, as he had learned thanks to his best friend the Irminsul — who also can't do shit — she had tried to model him after), amongst the Anemo and Geo Archons respectively.
Alhaitham frowned. Fuck him.
“Lady Kusanali said she doesn't want any visitors during her playdate with the Aranaras,” he said, crossing his arms and trying not to make it obvious that he wants to just tackled Ei to the ground and maybe slap her once or thrice. “She's also visiting the Dendro Dragon after that, and then she's going to be busy with her personal research.”
“We're her friends?” Barbatos tried with a smile. The god glanced at the Vision hanging on his chest.
He scowled. “You probably don't know this since you're outsiders,” he stressed the word, “but in Sumeru, sages hold the highest titles, and as the Second Sage of Buer, my words hold the same weight as hers, and the only one that can refute me is her.” He glared at them. “Now scram.”
“But we're her, like, special VIP friends?” the bard tried again.
“I know,” Wanderer said, unimpressed.
“You know they're gods, don't you?” Alhaitham asked the second sage once the three archons were out of hearing range.
The other scoffed. “Who do you take me for?” he asked. “It would bring shame to the Vahumana Darshan had I not recognised them.”
“I thought you hate the Akademiya?”
“Shut the hell up. And where's your roommate's key? He was asking if you're having a meeting with the lady thirty minutes ago.”
Ei had been staring at her pita pocket for give minutes straight. Venti frowned.
“What's wrong, Ei?” he asked, concerned.
“Want more sauce?” Zhongli offered.
She shook her head. “No, it's fine. I was just... thinking.”
“About?” he asked, taking the sauce Zhongli offered her. “You can share with us, you know? Unless it's a divine nail doomed secret. Then please keep those to yourself.”
Ei frowned, bit her lips before looking up, her hair bun had been undone.
“Buer's second sage is my son.”
“And you just sent them away?”
Nahida could not believe what she was hearing.
Wanderer crossed his arms and turned to his side. “So?” he asked, but she continued her staring.
He caved.
“She was there,” he sighed, “and you weren't, so I took some creative liberties.”
Nahida clicked her tongue. Wanderer had been smarter with his mouth after joining the Akademiya as a student. He knew she couldn't refute "creative liberties" as the Goddess of Wisdom.
“They will come tomorrow,” she said, “let them in, please. You don't have to open the door if you don't want to meet her.”
Wanderer, for his part, actually agreed to her idea. Nice. “I'll go bother Alhaitham or something.”
Nahida smiled and gave him a head pat.
“This place is really...” Barbatos looked around awkwardly, “green. Though, I suppose that does fit the Lord of Verdure, doesn't it?”
“Thanks,” Buer beamed. Adorable. She motioned to the... platform thing in the middle. “Have a seat!”
...No chairs? Or tables?
Buer smiled apologetically. “Sorry, I haven't had much time to redecorate the place after I got out,” she cutely said.
“That's is not a problem,” Ei said, patting the God of Wisdom on the head, “might I ask where you were imprisoned?”
“Uh, here,” she replied, adjusting her fringes.
Barbatos looked at her, she looked at Morax, who glanced at Buer.
“Nahida,” the bard started, “do you want to join us to visit Focalors?”
Nahida blinked. She cutely furrowed her eyebrows. “Focalors?” she echoed. “Didn't she...”
“She did,” Zhongli sighed somberly. “More correctly, we're going to visit Furina. Venti caught wind that there's going to be a festival soon.”
“Huh,” Nahida said. “But, didn't she give her Authority back to the Hydro Sovereign? Would he allow us to enter his domain?”
“Was Apep hard on you?” Ei asked, holding the young god in her arms.
“Well, a bit,” she said.
“Don't worry!” Venti said, pulling out his lyre. “I made a dragon like me once, I can do it again.” He giggled, “Besides, I don't think he'll refuse some well-intentioned tourists! Let's get you a fake Dendro Vision and we can be a little group of adventurers!”
“If you say so,” Nahida chuckled. “I'll tell my sages that I'm going to be away for a while. We can go then.”
“—and so, please listen to Grand Sage Alhaitham and Mr. Hat Guy!”
Hat Guy and Alhaitham shared a look.
It's a good thing the Dendro Archon is cute. Otherwise, none of them would be willing to do this.
“Holy me,” Venti cried, “we're finally out of the desert.”
“It's bad memories when we were attacked by that giant ruin machine,” Ei muttered. She looked ahead — Romaritime Harbor was literally a few miles away, “I certainly didn't remember the water levels being this high before. Makoto and I walked to the habor when we're visiting Egeria back then.”
“Are we sure the prophecy has passed?” Venti asked.
“Quite,” Zhongli sighed, “has been for a while, in fact. Childe was apparently part of it.”
“The Eleventh?” Nahida asked. Zhongli nodded.
“So, do we walk?” Ei asked, motioning to the sea.
It's a good thing that the Traveler always parked their waverider on coasts. Nahida wondered if they're back in Sumeru for something?
It's quite cramped with four people, but they made it work.
“I think the wind spirit ought to be one with the thousand winds again,” hissed Ei, hugging her tightly in her arms. Venti stuck out a tongue.
(No wonder Wanderer got that habit.)
“We're here,” Zhongli said, parking the boat and helping Ei out.
“A family, are we?” giggled the Melusine. “Take a seat! The ride will be going shortly!”
The Archons looked at each other.
Nahida smiled awkwardly. “Well, I suppose we do look like a family, albeit with some,” she paused, “cultural differences.”
Zhongli sighed.
To outsiders, Wriothesley and Sigewinne might look like a normal father-daughter pair going shopping, but to the people of Fontaine, it means important business.
Why? Because the Head Nurse of Meropide rarely showed her cute face in the overworld. Even the elusive Duke who loved to keep a low profile despite his status is more well-known than the Head Nurse.
But Wriothesley calls hearsay — this time, he and Sigewinne really were just going shopping.
(Neuvillette had given him a warning during the party with Lady Furina — and, Neuvillette being Neuvillette, he never really said it to Wriothesley's face. Just some passive agressiveness that, when asked, he blamed it on the alcohol, which Wriothesley knew for a fact that he never even go ten feet near during the party.)
“Which would suit Miss Clorinde better? Pink or cherry?” Sigewinne asked him, holding up the two lipsticks.
Now, Clorinde is a beautiful woman, but pink? With her wardrobe? And cherry?
“Give her the scarlet one,” he said, “Demoiselle Navia might fit better with the options you spoke.”
“Okay,” she said, handing it to the cashier. She stepped away and Wriothesley didn't even sigh. He knew he had to pay for her.
“Oh, please,” the cute Melusine rolled her eyes, crossing her arms, “you're loaded anyways. You were in the "Top 5 Richest People in Teyvat" on the Steambird last week.”
He didn't reply to that, only smirked.
“This would look good on you, Ei!” said an adorable voice. He didn't care much. Not until the cutie pie ran into him.
“Oh,” the white haired girl blinked, “sorry, mister. I didn't see you there.”
He chuckled, but refrained himself from giving her a head pat. “No worries there, little one. Are you lost?” he asked because Fontaine's Child Welfare Law sucks ass and he doesn't trust anyone with children in this nation.
(If one were to check on the statistics, they would be shocked how much homeless kids and abused children and the amount of child trafficking is out there in this Nation of Justice.)
“She's not,” a new voice said. He looked past the girl and a woman, notably purple, walked towards them. The girl held the woman's hand with a smile.
“Let's get Zhongli to pay for us,” the girl said, “I can stay here while you go get him.”
Now, normally, Wriothesley wouldn't give a shit, but this girl is cute and he's allergic to not helping cute kids so never in his mind did it cross to let a child be alone in this frankly dangerous city.
“I can pay for that,” he said before his brain could think. “For the cute little girl. Who are these for anyways? They're not for you, right?”
He looked at the stuff they got — two red eyeliners, a lip gloss and a cute stuffed toy of Monsieur Neuvillette and a Lady Furina keychain.
“The stuffed toy is for me!” she said as he handed the stuff to her. “The lip gloss is for Lady Furina!”
Wriothesley paused.
Zhongli looked at his wallet.
He had brought an amount the average person would consider expensive, yet when he took a peek inside, he only had half of what he brought.
“You and Mora management,” sighed the twink bard, obviously less sober than he was just a second ago.
“At least I have some,” he sniffed, “and job. Unlike someone.”
Venti laughed. “Touché.”
“We're back!” Nahida announced. He blinked when he saw the items in her hands.
“You didn't steal those, right?” Venti asked, blinking all the same.
Ei scoffed. “A nice gentleman paid for us,” she said.
Nahida giggled. “He said it's because I was cute,” she said proudly. “I take that as a compliment.”
(Because Nahida knew, for a fact, that she is cute. It's just unfortunately that the people she works with are all stubborn beings who can never be honest with themselves about her cuteness.)
“You are,” Zhongli affirmed.
“He's the prison warden, by the way,” Ei added. She took out a piece of paper, “He gave a rough schedule of the Iudex. He said it's best we talk to him first before actually going to meet Furina.”
“I wonder what he's like,” Nahida said aloud. “He hasn't come to talk to us yet, and it looked like he's a civil guy with how the Duke described him.”
“The Duke?” Ei blinked.
Nahida nodded, then tilted her head. “Were you not aware of his status?”
The other three Archons looked at each other.
Neuvillette, for once in his very long life, hated paperworks.
The door to his office opened and he buried the urge to scream out the window and jumped from the top of the Opera House.
But he didn't. Because Sedene was the one carrying the paperworks in.
(If it was Iaune or Cornelia he might have done the above, but alas, they knew of his love for Melusines and therefore always sent them in to make sure he's constantly in a good mood.)
(Maybe, probably, most likely because of one time, about 187 years ago, he actually got mad at them for something he barely even remembered. Apparently he was a bit tipsy — thanks to Lady Furina — and apparently it was so bad that, several generations later, the Maison Gestion never dared to make him mad.)
(It was, apparently, justified, since they did fuck up real bad that time for some reason. But still. It's a mystery to him til this day, and when asked nobody answered him. Suspicious.)
“There's some people who wanted to have an audience with you,” said Sedene aa she placed the paperworks on the ground as a new pile because there's literally no room left for them on his desk.
Neuvillette did a double take.
“Who?” in the hell, but he would never say that aloud.
Sedene shrugged. “Apparently they wanted to meet Lady Furina.”
Neuvillette paused. The only people that would want to meet Furina would be...
Sedene jumped in surprise when the Iudex quite literally kicked the chair. He took out his cane, regained his composure, fixed his attire and stomped out of the room like he was fashionably late for a trial one time.
Venti hissed when he got a peek at the Hydro Sovereign coming out of his office.
“He reminds me of you,” he said to Zhongli, who gave him a look.
“I don't mind,” he said, “but he would.”
When the Iudex turned the corner towards them, Venti, God of Freedom as he is, somehow managed to feel like death is near.
Ei looked unfazed as always, and Zhongli was trying to focus of his book. Only Nahida looked remotely nervous, but she's more curious than nervous.
“Uh, hello, Iudex Neuvillette,” Venti waved when the guy actually came. He dragged Nahida in front of him. The Iudex examined her.
Nahida, for her part, looked less nervous and more awkward. So, holding her stuffed Iudex toy, she waved. “Hi,” she said, “I'm Nahida.”
For an intense moment, Venti felt like this is a vas decision.
The the Iudex's eyes softened and patter her head. “Yes, hello. My name is Neuvillette, the Chief Justice — or Iudex — of the Court of Fontaine.” He looked around, “I heard you wish to see Lady Furina?”
“Indeed,” said Zhongli. “Greetings, Iudex. I'm Zhongli, a Consultant of Wangsheng Funeral Parlor, and, as per my contract with the director,” he fished out his wallet and took out a card, passing it to the Chief Justice, “here's my business card, and the also the company's.”
Neuvillette stared at the mortuary service he had been offered before pocketing the cards.
“Are we doing introductions now?” asked Ei, more bored than anything. “I'm known as Raiden Ei. I'm a wandering swordswoman.”
Then Neuvillette turned to him. Fuck.
“Greetings, dearest Iudex of Fontaine!” he tried to manage a smile, “I'm Venti the bard! Three times "Most Popular Bard in Mondstadt" champion!”
“Great,” said Ei, “now that we're acquainted, we would like to get your permission to visit Lady Furina.”
The Iudex narrowed his eyes. “For what, may I ask?”
Everyone looked at him.
“A get-together!” he said. Sheesh, this judge is giving him the jitters today... “And also we're planning to go on a holiday with her. Company sponsored.”
“Like I said,” Ei sighed, though pointedly, “I thought we all quit.”
“They didn't know that we quit,” said Zhongli. “So might as well use the company card.”
“You have a company card?” Neuvillette felt inclined to ask because what the fuck.
“The Tsaritsa is hoarding it,” said Nahida. She went closer to the Iudex and tugged on his outfit, “Can we see Furina? I've been meaning to meet her since forever.”
Neuvillette is the Chief Justice of Fontaine — their highest judge, in fact. Therefore, it comes with the job that he shall give the final verdict without bias, unwavering in his judgement.
His job requires one to be stern, undeterred, fair and commanding.
Unfortunately, Neuvillette is neither of those words.
From his love for his daughters to how much of an emotional wreck he became upon the death of his supposed mortal enemy, Neuvillette had long realized that he was not made for this job.
But one can learn, and he did. He learned of humans, emotions and how to do a hell load of paperwork in one night.
So, with that said, Neuvillette released his urge to pat Buer's head.
“Sure,” he said, “I'll give you her address. Make sure she enjoys herself.”
Barbatos grinned and punched the air in excitement, while Beelzebul and Morax just smiled in satisfaction. Buer, however, quite literally beamed, and Neuvillette took out the sunglasses Demoiselle Navia gave to him during the celebratory party.
“Thank you, Monsieur Neuvillette!” she hugged his toy plushie and, dear Nibelung, how is she so damn cute.
“Not a problem,” he unconsciously smiled and patted her head again. “I must go now,” before I kidnap you and treat you to lunch, “enjoy your trip.”
(From the accounts of Sedene the Melusine, Monsieur Neuvillette slammed the door to his office — which made half of the Maison Gestion lost consciousness due to sheer shock — and moments later, squealing could be heard from inside the Iudex's office.)
Knock knock
Furina's eye twitched. She glanced at her grandfather's clock — it's nearly dusk. What kind of door-to-door business was this now?
Knock knock
She cursed. “Coming!” she yelled. She slipped on her slippers and trudged towards the door, intentionally being late. Hopefully whoever it was would be gone by the time she arrived.
She peeked through her door. Nope. Still there.
Sighing, she opened the door. “Who is it? Do you not see how dark it is?”
And she was ready to slam the door back — her reputation be damned. She wanted to finish the novel she was reading. They were about to kiss, dammit.
“Uh,” huh? A child's voice?
Furina opened her eyes. She blinked.
Fuck.
“I'm sorry!” wailed Furina as Nahida patted her on the back. “I thought you were some annoying people wanting to use my name to make their careers boom!”
Venti was cackling on the floor as Furina sobbed. Zhongli sighed. “It's alright,” he said, “I'm sure we all understand how that feels like.”
“I do!” Venti choked through snorts. “Though they don't know I'm Barbatos.”
Furina sniffed. “What do they know you as, then?”
“Venti!” he did a pose. “Also Three Times Champion of "The Most Popular Bard in Mondstadt". And also Bardboy.”
“He's a freelance musician,” Zhongli surmised.
Venti scoffed. “And he's a broke walking encyclopedia that works at a mortuary.”
“I literally paid for all our expenses up to this point,” the (former) Geo Archon refuted.
“A mortuary?” Furina blinked.
Zhongli sighed. “A funeral home,” he clarified, “I served as a consultant.”
“He arranged his own funeral,” chimed Venti with a giggle. He got bonked by a rock.
Furina blinked at that information.
“I go by Zhongli these days,” he said, after he finished decking the bard. Then, as if remembering something, he pulled out his wallet and took out two cards, handing it to Furina. “Here's my and the company's business cards.”
Upon Furina's dumbfounded response, Ei chimed. “It's in his employment contract, apparently,” she said.
Furina nodded awkwardly.
“Anyways,” Nahida changed the topic, “we came here to invite you on a holiday! We're touring the four nations.”
“Company sponsored!” sang Venti, already browsing Furina's cabinets for wine. “Sheesh, all you have is macaroni huh girl?” he muttered.
Thankfully Furina didn't hear that. Instead, she asked, “I thought we quit?” She looked at each of the Archons, “And I wasn't even hired.”
“They don't know that we quit,” said Nahida, “and you were hired!”
Furina bit her lips. “Well...”
“The Iudex already gave his permission, if that's what you're worried about,” Zhongli said smoothly, taking a bite of the (frankly too) sweet macarons that Furina prepared.
Furina blinked. “He did? Really? That Neuvillette?” she asked, bewildered. “Well then, sure I guess. But,” she paused, looking down, “are you sure you want me to come along?”
“We didn't come here just to waste Zhongli's Mora, you know?” Venti rolled his eyes. “Are you coming or not? Yes or no.”
Furina was quiet, looking at her feet and indecisive. Nahida walked to her and held her hands with a smile. Furina looked up and saw Ei's encouraging nod.
She faced Venti with a smile.
“Yes, I'll come to this "company sponsored" trip.”