Chapter 1: familiar
Notes:
TW for self harm mention and also mention of being taken advantage of (not between will & nico), and mentions of an ed
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
Will listened as Nico got ready for his classes. He heard the drawer, the water, all of that. He just layed there, staring at the ceiling.
“Will?” Nico whispered, his head coming into view.
“Mm?” Will hummed in response.
“I’m heading off to my art class. See you later, Amore.” Nico kissed Will on the forehead and left the room.
Will felt…strange. Was it the new dose of his medication his therapist, Dr. Smith, recommended? A few months ago he’d already had the dose increased, but she insisted it’d get increased just once more.
His head felt dizzy. It had to be the medicine. He rolled over to his side, checking his phone.
It was 10am. He should probably get ready for his shift at Starbucks, which is at 11.
Will forced himself out of bed and groggily walked over to the bathroom.
He quickly brushed his teeth and got ready. Before he knew it, he was already on his way to Starbucks.
“Hey, Will.” Rachel said as Will walked behind the counter, his green apron on.
“Hey.” He replied, sighing.
Rachel’s eyebrows furrowed. “What’s the matter?”
“My meds are makin’ me feel all weird, I don’t know. I feel bad because I barely said anything to Nico earlier before he left. I always do.”
“Will, it’s fine. He probably knows when you feel sick or whatever. You’re like, soulmates.”
Will smiled. “Soulmates? That’s a new one.”
Rachel waved off Will’s response. “You two are. Everyone knows.”
“Everyone but my dad.” Will mumbled.
“Oh , right .” Rachel said, leaning against the counter.
“Uhm, whatever, I gotta start making drinks. Talk to you later.” Will quickly explained, turning around to start working on his first coffee of the day.
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“How are you feeling?” Nico mumbled into Will’s hair as they cuddled on the couch.
“Mm. Strange, I’m lightheaded from my meds. Sorry I didn’t say much earlier.”
Nico softly kissed the top of Will’s head. “It’s okay, Love. I knew you felt sick.”
“Do you think we’re soulmates?” Will blurted out after a few moments.
Nico stared at Will. “Probably.” He replied with a laugh.
Will smiled. “I love you.” He whispered.
“I love you too.” Nico replied, kissing Will on the cheek.
⋆⁺₊⋆ ☀︎ ⋆⁺₊⋆
Later that night, Will’s head was filled with thoughts. Bad ones, he thinks.
His head felt fuzzy and numb. He had this pit in his stomach and chest. The urge to hurt himself.
“Nico?” Will asked worriedly.
“What is it?” Nico said, looking slightly concerned.
“The…my scars itch. I have the feeling.”
“Oh, Will, come here.” Nico murmured, pulling Will close. Crystal also decided to roll closer to the both of them on the bed.
“How strong?” Nico asked softly.
“Just..fuzzy. I don’t know what to do.”
“Want to try ice? Drawing?”
“Ice.” Will answered.
“Okay, Will, stay here please. I’ll get you some.”
Will nodded as Nico got up to go get an ice cube.
Will sat there, trying not to itch his scars. It felt like they were screaming at him.
Nico quickly came back with a wet melting ice cube in his palm. He gave it to Will, and Will started rubbing it against his wrist.
˚₊ ⋆ ☠︎︎ ⋆ ₊˚
Nico sat there, worriedly watching as Will tried to make the feeling go away. It seemed to be working.
Will eventually stopped, the ice cube melting into a small puddle on their bed.
“How do you feel now, Amore?” Nico asked softly.
“I feel…fine. It worked for the most part.” Will answered.
“Okay, that’s good. Really good.” Nico said, hugging Will tight.
“Wanna sleep now? This day’s been shit.” Will suggested.
“Of course.”
They turned off the main lamp, only leaving the small night light and fairy lights on. Nico stared at the ceiling, thinking about that one night.
That night he almost got hurt. That night he got taken advantage of, or almost, at least. That man, his name was...Kyle. His stupid apartment smelled like weed and Nico should’ve known it was a bad idea, but he was 19 and desperate for someone to “love” him.
How fucking stupid was he to think trying to hook up with random men would help him feel “loved.” It didn’t, it was awful and he just ended up feeling more alone afterwards. And God, the amount of people who sexualized him and probably didn’t even like guys, they just wanted to treat this gay guy like shit. For their own little fetish. It makes Nico feel sick.
Nico rolled over, staring at Will, who was peacefully sleeping. The way his curly hair laid on the pillow, and the way his chest moved up and down, again and again. Nico wanted to sleep peacefully too. He did, most nights. Especially when he was with Will, or Crystal, or both. Nico slowly sat up, scanning the room for the little black cat that always puts a smile on his face.
Nico didn’t see her on the bed, maybe she was in her own bed tonight. He glanced over at the bathroom doorway and there sat Crystal, staring directly at Nico. God, sometimes the little angel scares him like that.
She mewed quietly and ran over to jump onto the bed next to Nico. Nico pet her softly, booping her little nose too.
Nico laid back down, staring at the ceiling once again. His mind was foggy, thinking about Kyle and how angry that whole ordeal made him. How he kissed Nico with no consent, then started trying to take his clothes off. It makes Nico want to throw up.
That was a year ago. Nico feels like a completely different person now. He’s happier, with a loving boyfriend. He doesn’t need random men to make him feel loved. He’s proud of himself, and how far he’s come from that.
Now that Nico’s with Will, he’s discovered some things about himself , too. He realizes now that his sex drive isn’t even that strong. He’s not asexual, but he doesn’t ever feel like he needs sex. Especially if Will doesn’t want it. Maybe it’s all the trauma from his past hookups, but he feels like he can just masturbate if he needs to. It’s not a big deal.
Nico closed his eyes, and he eventually fell asleep.
˚₊ ⋆ ☠︎︎ ⋆ ₊˚
Nico awoke to rain hitting the window. He stirred, opening his eyes to Will’s blond curls in his face.
Nico relaxed and held his arms around Will.
“Are you awake?” Will whispered.
“Yeah.” Nico answered quietly.
Will slowly turned his body around to face Nico. “Hey, good mornin.’”
Nico smiled. “Good morning.”
Will yawned, covering his mouth with his hoodie sleeve.
Nico laughed. “Same.”
“It’s raining, what do you wanna do today?” Will asked.
“I dunno.” It’s Saturday, so neither of them have work or classes. Nico’s glad, because he really doesn’t feel like working today.
Will leaned into Nico’s hug. “Hmm. Let’s make breakfast.” Will mumbled into Nico’s shoulder.
“Alright.” Nico said with a smile.
Nico doesn’t know why he always wears this art program sweatshirt he got from high school. It’s just comfortable and familiar. He likes things that way, just like how he likes this little apartment.
Sure, it’s small, but it fits what they need, and they allow animals.
“Eggs and toast?” Will asked, getting the materials out.
“Sure,” Nico answered.
˚₊ ⋆ ☠︎︎ ⋆ ₊˚
They made the food together, it was nice and familiar. The food tasted nice, too.
They both sat on the couch together. Nico still hasn’t told Will much about his life before they met.
“Will?” Nico whispered.
“Yeah?”
“Can I talk about something?”
“Of course. You don’t need to ask.”
Nico snuggled close to Will. “I used to get treated like an animal by these straight men. They manipulated me and used me and I thought they actually liked me,” Nico’s voice wavered, “turns out they just used me for their fetish. The only reason I got out of that was Jason and Percy. I was at this party and they saw me getting treated like crap and helped me. That’s how I know them.”
Will stared at Nico, not saying anything. He then said, “Nico…I’m so sorry that all happened to you. You didn’t deserve that. Nobody does. I’m glad Percy and Jason were there for you. I’m..I don’t know what to say. Sorry.”
“It’s okay. I know it’s not easy to respond to.”
“I would beat the shit out of them.” Will said softly.
“How can you say that so lovingly?” Nico asked with a small smile.
“‘Cause I hate them.”
“Fair enough. Also.. uhm, there’s more. They sexualized me and made me feel awful about myself. I..stopped eating for a while. And then the, uh, self harm you know about. But, I’m mostly better at eating now. You’ve probably noticed I don’t finish a lot of my meals, though. I’m still recovering.”
Will hugged Nico. “First time I noticed it was Halloween. Then, I just kind of slowly started noticing every once in a while. But I didn’t know if it meant that or not.”
Nico nodded, leaning into Will’s embrace. “I’m a lot better now. Please don’t worry about it too much. You know I also see a therapist.”
“Mhm. I can't say I won’t worry but I understand you’re feeling better and healthier.”
“Okay. Thank you, for being so understanding. About everything.”
Will smiled. “Of course.”
Notes:
hello again my lovely readers <3 i appreciate u guys so fucking much. thank u for supporting my writing and looking out for me during the fallout with my friend <333
doing a lot better. realizing everything they did to me, all the borderline mlm homophobia towards me despite them being queer and an “ally” for me..lmaoo. u can’t be a lgbtq ally for only queer ppl who like women…i’m mlm so that one hurt tbh.
i’ve been going to the youth group at the pride center for almost a month now and it was a rough start to be honest, everyone ignored me like i didn’t exist the first night i came :( but i stayed strong and kept going and still no kids have talked to me (i’m very quiet and not very talkative but still) BUT the volunteers have now talked to me and they’re all very nice i even told them my name n stuff. one of them liked my R2-D2 backpack so yayy
anyways, thank u for reading this first chapter. it’s short, and honestly not that eventful but the story gets going pretty fast. hope u enjoy :)
Chapter 2: sleepover
Summary:
“Yeah, Anakin turned into Darth Vader. Long story my love, guess that means we’ll have to watch the movies together.” Will said with a smile.
“‘Course you’re getting all sappy over Star Wars.” Rachel added.
“Humph.” Will crossed his arms.
“Okay, guys, enough. Are we watching this Mean Girls movie or not?” Nico asked.
Notes:
hi!!
warning for brief flashback scene of nico's experience with kyle, it's non-consensual kissing and it doesn't really get further than that thankfully, he also hits nico once, here’s your warning.
if you’d like to skip that scene, stop at: “That night, Nico dreamt of Kyle.” and continue at: “Nico started crying, waking himself up.”
enjoy! <3
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
Rachel said she wants to have a sleepover, so Will’s asking Nico if that’s okay. Rachel said Jason and Percy can come too, if they want. She wants to meet them.
“Nico? Rachel wants to have a sleepover. She said Jason and Percy can come if you want.” Will said as Nico painted.
“Really? That would be fun. Where are we gonna fit all these people though?” Nico answered, dipping his paintbrush in the water again.
“Don’t know. Wanna just invite Rachel?”
“Sure, I think Percy’s got a swim meet anywa—“
A loud crash was followed by an annoyed sounding Nico.
“Crystal, baby, why ?!” Nico shouted.
Will turned around to see a puddle on the floor—Will guesses that’s the paint water—and Crystal drenched in some of it. She then started licking some of it which is when Nico picked her up.
“Don’t drink that. Why’d you do that?” Nico said in a loving yet annoyed tone.
“ Meow! ” Crystal mewed as Nico brought her to the bathroom. Will followed.
“I don’t know what she was thinking. Silly Kitty.” Nico said as he booped her on the nose.
Will couldn’t help but smile. “You’re giving her a bath? I can help.”
“Yeah, just a quick one to get the paint water off. She doesn’t like baths.”
“Okay. If you hold her I’ll wash the water off.”
˚₊ ⋆ ☠︎︎ ⋆ ₊˚
Nico doesn’t remember the last time he had a group sleepover. Probably not since he was little. He wouldn’t know, he barely remembers anything before he was, like, 7, and everything since then hasn’t been group sleepovers.
Rachel knocked on the door, and Will quickly went to open it.
“Hey.” Will said as she stepped in the door.
“Hi you two. Nico, I haven’t seen you in a bit.” She said, reaching her arms out for a hug.
Nico hugged her. “We got an area set up by the couch for us.” Nico added.
“Alright, cool. What movie are we watching?” Rachel asked as they all sat down on the pillow and blankets in front of the couch.
“You pick.” Will said, grabbing a piece of popcorn from their popcorn bucket.
“Well, you know for a fact I’m picking Mean Girls . It’s a good sleepover movie.”
Will and Rachel turned over to face Nico, who just shrugged. “I’ve never seen it.”
“ What? Okay, well, then I guess it’s settled, William. No Star Wars this time.” She smirked, taking a piece of popcorn.
“ Rachel, I was gonna let you guys pick anyways.” Will said defensively.
“ Uh-huh. So we weren’t going to have you crushing over Anakin again?”
“I wouldn’t have picked Revenge of the Sith . We would’ve watched A New Hope .” Will crossed his arms.
“Who’s Anakin?” Nico asked with a grin.
“Oh my Lord— He’s Luke’s father, he’s “hot” according to Will over here.” Rachel pointed her thumb at Will who was hugging a pillow.
“Rachel, I swear , I was, like, 15! ” Will’s southern accent was strong.
“Wait but isn’t Darth Vader his father?” Nico asked, confused.
“Yeah, Anakin turned into Darth Vader. Long story my love, guess that means we’ll have to watch the movies together.” Will said with a smile.
“‘Course you’re getting all sappy over Star Wars. ” Rachel added.
“Humph.” Will crossed his arms.
“Okay, guys, enough. Are we watching this Mean Girls movie or not?” Nico asked.
“Yes!” The two others said at the same time.
˚₊ ⋆ ☠︎︎ ⋆ ₊˚
The three of them sat against the couch, watching the film. Will was in the middle, Nico snuggled against Will’s chest. Rachel was happily eating the buttered popcorn and candy.
Rachel laughed at the TV, Will did too. Nico smiled. He didn’t fully understand some of the humor, but it was still a funny movie nonetheless.
The movie ended, and everyone seemed happy with the choice of film. Nico liked it, he honestly wouldn’t expect himself to, but it was hilarious.
“Nico, what movie would you have picked?” Rachel asked when Will went to the bathroom.
“Probably Scream.” Nico answered.
Rachel grinned. “Good choice. You’re a horror person?”
“Yeah, but I also think most of them suck. I still enjoy them though. That’s the fun part.”
Rachel nodded. Will came back, sitting back down in between the two of them.
“Are you guys tired? Or what do we wanna do?” Will asked.
Nico thought for a moment. He’d kinda like to sleep, but he’ll see what the others say.
“We could sleep. Nico looks tired.” Rachel said, tapping her knees gently.
“I am.” Nico said, yawning.
“Okay, I’m turning off the lights.” Will got up and turned off the big lights, only leaving the small night lights on around them.
Rachel stretched and laid down on her pillow.
Will laid down next to Nico, positioning the pillows to be most comfortable for the both of them.
“Ready for sleep?” Will asked, holding Nico’s face.
Nico nodded. “Yeah. I’m tired.”
Nico snuggled up against Will, and fell asleep.
˚₊ ⋆ ☠︎︎ ⋆ ₊˚
That night, Nico dreamt of Kyle.
Nico walked into Kyle’s sweaty little gross apartment, the smell of weed hitting him instantly.
“Hey, boy, what’s your name again?” Kyle slurred.
“Nico. Nico di Angelo, you matched with me on that app? You asked me to come over.”
“Oh right, come this way.”
Nico nervously followed Kyle into his small bedroom, and that’s when shit happened.
Kyle pinned Nico down on the bed and kissed him, trying to take off Nico’s clothes.
Nico fought to get this man off of him. “Hey, stop! Please!” He managed to yell.
Kyle got off of him, half of Nico’s shirt unbuttoned. “Get away from me. You’re supposed to ask.” Nico mumbled, walking towards the door.
Kyle stopped him, raising his arm and slapping Nico across the face.
“ Che cazzo?!”
“English, dumbass.” Kyle said, rushing towards Nico who was opening his window.
“I said what the fuck. You’re a freak.” Nico said, jumping out of Kyle’s window.
Nico probably fell at least 5 feet onto the cold ground. Luckily, he didn’t get hurt.
He quickly ran back to his shared apartment, crying.
˚₊ ⋆ ☠︎︎ ⋆ ₊˚
Nico started crying, waking himself up. He was trying to quiet himself with the pillow and blankets around him, but no help though, Will was already waking up.
“Angel?” Will whispered softly as he went to gently touch Nico’s upper back.
Nico let out a sob and clinged onto Will.
“Nightmare?” Will asked barely above a whisper. They didn’t want to wake Rachel.
Nico nodded quickly. “Bad. Really bad.”
“Is it about those men?” Will whispered oh-so-softly into Nico’s ear, so that Nico would be the only person in the world to hear the question.
“Yeah.” Nico sobbed, hugging Will tighter than he probably should.
“Do you get those often? You’ve never told me about any nightmares.”
“Sometimes. Usually I just wake up and everything’s fine. But this time it really bothered me.”
Will nodded, gently rubbing circles on Nico’s back. “Wanna go back to sleep?” Will asked quietly.
“No, not really. I want some fresh air.” Nico said, walking towards the door. He put on his coat and walked down to the street.
Will must’ve followed because he was outside too.
“Will?” Nico asked softly.
“Do you..want to talk about it or no?” Will asked, holding Nico’s hand tight.
“Sure. I’m doing a lot better now, Love. Sometimes I still get bad dreams related to my bad past experiences, but it’s very minimal now. I want you to know I’m doing better. Since I met you and Rachel I’ve been happier than I’ve been in a while.”
Will smiled, his breath showing in the cold night air. “I’m glad to hear that.”
God, he was adorable. Nico smiled back, swinging their arms back and forth slightly.
“I feel bad we left Rachel,” Will added.
Nico laughed. “Yeah, let’s go back up there.”
Notes:
anakin is almost as cutie patootie as will. almost. ANYWAYS..scream is my fave movie so i had to reference it somehow lmao
i'm currently on a day trip in canada (i've never been here before) i live in the US lolll
thank you for reading this chapter :) i can’t wait to share more of will & rachel’s friendship i love them!! ik you got some in the first fic but there’s even more to come in future chapters.
i think this fic is gonna have a similar posting schedule to the last one, so twice a week? i’m not actually finished with this one yet so at some point i might go to once a week so i have less pressure to finish up my chapters. this WILL be finished btw i would never leave it unfinished. i just don’t know how many chapters there’s gonna be just yet!
PS i use google translate for the italian in this fic and ik it’s not always 100% accurate so i’m sorry about that!
Chapter 3: baths and dates
Summary:
“You’re amazing.”
Will’s eyes fluttered open slowly. “W-what?”
“Don’t know. I felt like letting you know.”
Will smiled, booping every little beauty mark on Nico’s face.
“You’re the best.” Will whispered.
Notes:
hellooo!! :)
tw for mention of sh scars and internalized acephobia
i keep updating the tags as i write more of this and post more chapters lmao, enjoy!
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
“Whatcha wanna do tonight?” Nico asked, rolling over to face Will.
“Hmm. I don’t know. Let’s take a bath?” Will murmured.
“Yeah. A bath would be nice. Let’s go,” Nico got up from the bed and guided Will to the bathroom.
“We’re making it romantic tonight. I got rose petals and a candle set up.” Nico added, starting the water.
Will nodded. He was nervous, not because he’s taking a bath with his boyfriend, they’ve seen each other nude before. It’s not that. It’s that he just relapsed last night and his fresh scars will be visible.
“Okay, can you hand me the petals?” Nico asked, now scattering the petals across the water.
Will lit their candle and turned the lights off. They also had bought a cool rainbow led light for when they take baths in the dark.
Nico stripped and got in the bath, putting his knees to his chest.
Will just stood there, his clothes still on.
“Will, are you not comfy with this today?” Nico asked, resting his head on the side of the bathtub.
“I am. It’s just..” Will tried not to cry, his throat getting sore, “I relapsed yesterday.”
Nico’s face softened. “Love, come here.”
Will went over and sat down by the bathtub.
Nico held Will’s face and kissed him softly. “I love you. You’re going to be alright.”
Will took a shaky breath. “I..know. I think. But, you’ll see the scars. Would you even be okay looking at them considering how fresh they are?”
“I don’t know. How about you stay where you are? Is this okay?” Nico asked.
Will nodded. He didn’t exactly know what to do, just sit by the tub while Nico’s in it?
Will closed his eyes and laid his head on Nico’s shoulder.
“Mmm? Are you tired?” Nico murmured.
“Kinda. I just need some comfort.”
Nico wrapped his damp arms around Will’s head, then booped his nose gently.
“You’re amazing.”
Will’s eyes fluttered open slowly. “W-what?”
“Don’t know. I felt like letting you know.”
Will smiled, booping every little beauty mark on Nico’s face.
“ You’re the best.” Will whispered.
⋆⁺₊⋆ ☀︎ ⋆⁺₊⋆
Will and Nico sat on their bed, Nico laying out multiple nail polish bottles.
There was black, yellow, light pink, and forest green.
Nico clearly enjoys the black the most, as he’s always painting his that color.
“Which color would you like?” Nico asked, setting up the nail polish remover and q-tips.
“Uhm, I’m not sure. I like the pink.” Will answered, laying his hand out for Nico to grab.
“Alright, we’ll do the pink.”
Nico gently held Will’s hand as he started painting his nails. The nail polish felt slightly cool to the touch.
Nico’s hair fell to his face as he bent down to focus on Will’s nails. He was so cute.
“Okay, the first coat is done. Don’t move your hands too much or you’ll ruin the nail polish.” Nico said, admiring his work.
Will stared at his painted nails. It was so cool, he’s never painted his nails before. He guesses he just never thought of doing it.
⋆⁺₊⋆ ☀︎ ⋆⁺₊⋆
Valentine’s Day. Will hasn’t ever really cared for this Holiday, not until dating Nico. He wants to make today special, so he’s going to ask Nico out on a date.
“Neeks, I gotta ask you somethin’.” Will said as they cuddled in bed one night.
“Yeah, what is it?” Nico responded into Will’s chest.
“Would you like to go on a date? Tomorrow? For Valentine’s day.”
Nico smiled even though Will couldn’t see it.
“Of course. Where do you wanna go?” Nico asked.
“This nice Italian place you said you liked. You said they were authentic.”
“Oh, yeah! I’d love for you to take me there, Love. I have the perfect outfit.”
Will smiled. “Me too.”
“Is it actually fashionable, William?”
“ Yes! Why wouldn’t it be?”
“Last date we had you wore crocs. ”
“Crocs are comfortable! And that wasn’t even a fancy date.”
“Okay, okay, I believe you do have an actual nice outfit somewhere in your closet.”
“You would be correct,” Will laughed.
⋆⁺₊⋆ ☀︎ ⋆⁺₊⋆
Today is Valentine’s Day. Will has his fancy date outfit picked out, and he hopes Nico will like it.
He put it on in the bathroom. It was a white button up with a gold tie. He wore regular black dress pants and slacks to go with it.
His nails were starting to chip, which made him kinda sad. He knows he can just ask Nico to paint them again whenever, though.
Will took a deep breath as he walked out of the bathroom, ready to see Nico’s choice of an outfit.
God , Nico looked so gorgeous. He wore an all black suit with a bunch of silver jewelry. All his piercings stuck out against the black. And to top it all off, he wore rings, eyeliner, and Doc Martens.
“My God , Nico. You look so fuckin’ good.” Will blurted out. He hadn’t meant to say it out loud. Fuck.
Nico smirked. “Thank you, Amore. You look amazing too. Also, you're allowed to stare.” He said, kissing Will on the lips.
Will’s face went warm. “Okay, are you ready to go? We have reservations for 7pm.”
“Yeah. Let’s say bye to Crystal.” Nico walked out into the living room, picking up the cat from where she was sitting on the couch.
He kissed her softly on the head. “My little baby. See you later. Don’t be naughty.”
He set her down, and she rubbed against Nico’s ankle. “ Mew!”
Nico nodded enthusiastically. “Yeah! And you’ll get treats and pets and loves when we get home. See you later!” Nico said in that high-pitched pet voice.
Will smiled as he waved goodbye to Crystal and followed his boyfriend out the door.
⋆⁺₊⋆ ☀︎ ⋆⁺₊⋆
“What are you eating?” Nico asked as they sat across from each other at their small table. There was a lit candle and some flowers in between them.
“I dunno. Maybe some pasta.” Will replied, staring at the menu.
“What if we share one,” Nico suggested.
“Sure. Let’s get Alfredo.”
Once their pasta arrived, they both ate it together, joking around and laughing to each other.
They finished their food, and Nico stared deeply into Will’s eyes. “I liked this. Thank you for asking me out.” Nico said softly.
“Of course, Angel,” Will then lowered his voice, “I wanna try something when we get home? Is that okay?”
Nico nodded. “It’s always okay, we’ll talk about it when we get home.”
Will nodded.
⋆⁺₊⋆ ☀︎ ⋆⁺₊⋆
Nico hugged Will from behind, resting his chin on his boyfriend’s shoulder. “Okay, what were you thinking tonight?”
Will sighed and leaned into Nico’s touch. “It’s stupid..” Will mumbled.
“It’s not stupid, Will, what’s up?”
“I wanted to try dry humping? We’ll still have underwear or clothes on. What about that?”
“Yeah, we can do that. Who do you want on top?”
“Uhm, I really don’t care who, but I think I’ll be on top to start?”
Nico nodded. “Sure. Want me to lay down here?” Nico motioned to the middle of their bed.
“Sure. But, uh, you can take your shirt off if you’d like. I think I’m gonna keep mine on though.” Will said nervously.
“Okay.” Nico nodded and took his shirt off.
Nico laid down on his back as Will crawled on top of him. He sat on his hips.
“This okay for you?” Will asked, softly brushing a hair out of Nico’s face.
“Yeah. You?”
“Yes. So do I just..start moving my hips?”
“Whatever you want to try.” Nico replied.
Will nodded and started slowly moving his hips back and forth. It felt nice.
After a few moments, it started feeling warm down there. Does that mean it’s working? Will thought.
Nico huffed. “Feels nice. Does it for you?” He asked.
“Yeah. It does. But I think I’m done.” Will whispered, rolling over onto his back next to Nico.
They stared at each other for a moment, neither one saying anything.
“Is something bothering you?” Nico asked softly after a moment.
“I just…I know we already had this conversation, but I just feel like I’m broken or something. Like I can’t even do anything.”
“Will…you know that’s not true. You’re not broken at all.” Nico gently held Will’s face.
“I know, I know…but then why do I feel so awful about my asexuality? Why does it have to be so complicated?”
“It doesn’t have to be complicated if you accept it and try to understand it better, Love.”
Will nodded, leaning into Nico’s touch. “I guess—I guess I’m just struggling to accept myself.”
“That’s okay, I think lots of people struggle with that.” Nico gave a knowing look.
“You did, didn’t you? I remember what you said..”
“Yeah. It’s still hard, I can’t lie about that. But it’s better. Things are better.” Nico said gently.
“Mhm, I’ll be nicer to myself about it. I promise.”
Nico smiled, hugging Will closely.
Notes:
happy almost new year! (or maybe it already is the new year when ur reading this)
i don’t have much to say today i just felt like posting haha. thank you to my dad for helping me beta read and edit this chapter.
Chapter 4: conversations
Summary:
“Hey, Will?” Nico asked quietly, gently nudging Will’s shoulder.
“Mhm?” Will hummed, pausing the YouTube video.
“Can I ask you some things? Personal.”
Will breathed in and out deeply. “What is it?” He asked softly.
Notes:
hi!
tw for brief mention of sh scars (if i’m missing a warning for this chap lmk pls!!)
enjoy!
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
Will was running around their Minecraft world when Jason and Percy joined.
JasonGrace34 has joined the world.
SeaweedBrain has joined the world.
Will smiled, typing a hello.
MrSunshine: hey y'all where r u guys
While Will waited for a response, he reorganized his inventory and ran back to their base.
SeaweedBrain: hi will! we’re at the nether portal
Will typed an “okay” and walked over to the portal.
Percy and Jason were clearly pros. They had their full enchanted Netherite armor and weapons. Will just had diamond stuff with some enchantments, but not a lot.
JasonGrace34: Wanna get on a call?
MrSunshine: sure!!
Will connected to their call, saying hello.
“Hey guys, so what’s the plan for today?” Will asked the two other boys.
“We’re finding a bastion.” Jason said, crouching.
“God, okay, those are scary.” Will replied.
“You’ll be fine! You have us.” Percy added, walking into the portal.
Will followed them into the Nether, feeling very unprepared.
“Oh shit, there’s a Ghast. You have a shield, right, Will?” Percy asked.
“Yeah.”
“Okay good. Let’s go, I found one and I wrote down the cords.”
Will carefully followed Jason and Percy around the Nether, careful not to fall into the large pits of lava.
After around 15 minutes of running around, they finally found the bastion Percy was talking about. The piglins freaked Will out, maybe it's because Nico and him had watched one of those pigman horror movies.
“I’m totally not prepared for this, FYI.” Will said nervously.
Percy laughed lightly. “That’s okay, we know you’d rather be in the overworld farming or something, Southern boy.”
Will scoffed. “I grew up mostly in Austin. I occasionally went to my grandparents’ ranch but I can handle it, Percy.”
“I know, I know.”
“Guys. The brute is right there!” Jason exclaimed, running into the bastion.
Percy quickly followed, and Will just stood there. He honestly doesn’t wanna go in there. He’s not skilled like that.
GhostKing has joined the world.
Will, in real life, whipped his head to their bedroom, seeing Nico on the computer.
“Nico, come out here!” Will said, muted from the call.
Nico grabbed the laptop and sat next to Will on the couch.
“Hey. I just woke up. You are all on right now?” He asked.
“Yup. We’re on a call. I muted it for now though.”
“‘Kay. Why are you in the depths of the Nether?”
“Percy and Jason. They wanted to go to this bastion. I’m too scared though. I’m gonna go back to the overworld.” Will said, running back to the portal. He let the other two boys know in the game chat that he was heading back.
Will came back to the overworld, meeting Nico at the base.
Nico was putting signs all over the front of the house.
Will chuckled. “What do they say?” He asked, walking up to them.
Percy stop stealing from my chest
“He stole from you again?” Will asked.
“Yeah! He keeps taking my food and my diamonds. He’s got Netherite, what’s he need my shit for?” Nico exclaimed.
“I don’t know. I can talk to him about it.”
“Thank you.”
After a moment, Nico spoke again.
“Can I join the call?” He asked.
“Yeah. Here, I’ll unmute us.” Will replied, unmuting them.
“Stronzo, restituiscimi i miei diamanti! Percy, I swear to God.” Nico yelled into the laptop.
“Woah, woah, what?! Nico—“
“You fuckin’…give me my shit back!”
Percy came running over to the two of them, who were standing in the middle of their house made of spruce wood planks and stone bricks.
“What? What the hell do you mean?” Percy asked, looking slightly intimidating next to them.
Nico punched Percy’s character twice. “You stole my diamonds. And my food.”
“—What is going on?” Jason asked, walking into the base to meet the rest of them.
“How are you so sure it was me?” Percy asked.
“Well, clearly Will didn’t take my stuff, he’s got his own chests. And I don’t imagine Jason taking my noob stuff when he’s got his fancy shit.”
Percy crouched and hung his character’s head low.
“Oh, stop being so dramatic. I just want my diamonds back, please.” Nico said.
Percy stopped talking on the call and didn’t move his character for a moment. Then, he threw 32 diamonds at Nico.
“Lo sapevo! Thank you.” Nico said happily.
“Wow, Percy, stealing from my boyfriend comes with a price.” Will added, putting his armor back on.
Percy scoffed. “You can’t kill me if I leave the game.”
“I know you’ll come back in like, 5 minutes tops, Percy. Just accept it.”
“Guys, what about a truce?” Jason asked, standing in between everyone.
“Sure. Just don’t do it again.” Will said sincerely.
“Alright, Neeks, what do you say?” Percy asked, holding out a cake.
“Hmph. Yes. But I swear to you, Percy, if my stuff is gone again I’m throwing you in lava.” Nico said, taking the cake Percy threw in between them.
˚₊ ⋆ ☠︎︎ ⋆ ₊˚
Nico has questions he wants to ask Will. He would just go ahead and ask them, but they’re kind of none of his business. He wishes he could just already know them, then he’d know more of his boyfriend’s boundaries.
They’re very close and comfortable with each other. That’s just how they are. Nico knows lots about asexuality, but he wants to know more about Will’s asexuality in specific.
Nico’s going to ask Will right now. They’re laying in bed together, Will’s watching some bad X Factor auditions or something. Nico’s just along for the ride, as he likes to put it.
“Hey, Will?” Nico asked quietly, gently nudging Will’s shoulder.
“Mhm?” Will hummed, pausing the YouTube video.
“Can I ask you some things? Personal.”
Will breathed in and out deeply. “What is it?” He asked softly.
“I just..I want to know more about your boundaries. Sexual, intimate, that kinda stuff. Let me know anything you want me to know.”
Will smiled softly at Nico, snuggling closer to him while still facing his boyfriend.
“I guess, it’s a lot. I still don’t fully know everything yet, y’know, but I think these experiments we try help. But, uhm, I do have boundaries, I guess. I don’t mind being naked in front of you or with you. That’s something I’ve never been comfortable with with anyone else before. I’ve only dated one other time. This girl in high school, her name was Abby. She was…not very into me I don’t think. Or maybe she just didn’t like that I didn’t want have sex with her.”
Nico nodded, letting Will know he can continue.
“She would..hook up with other guys. While I was with her. My mom yelled at her one night. That was the last time I saw Abby, since I moved away after that. Anyways, what I’m trying to say is I wasn’t ever comfortable enough around her to try anything more than just kissing. Not even making out, just like little pecks or some shit. Obviously that’s not the case with you. So I’m very new to all this intimacy. Even the heated make-outs are a new thing to me. When we took that shower together on Halloween, I think that’s when I first stepped out of my comfort zone. But, you made it feel so natural. You never made it weird or commented on my body or scars which was something I was scared people would do. I love you for that. So much. And yeah, we’d glance at each other every once in a while, but we’re allowed to, ‘cause we’re consenting adults who are in a relationship. It took a minute for me to feel sexual attraction towards you, but I did that night we experimented with touching. And Valentine's day, when you wore that outfit, that’s why I thought we’d try something again.”
Will paused and took a deep breath, then let it out. Nico smiled softly at Will.
“And it’s so confusing , because I feel this attraction sometimes but not all the time, then when I do it’s not, like, a ton, but it’s definitely there. Which is where I think the gray-asexual part of my identity comes from. But then I only feel that occasional bit of attraction when I’m close and comfortable with someone. Like you. It’s just confusing, I guess. I think I’m getting off topic..”
“No, you’re fine, Love. I want you to tell me what you’re feeling and thinking. If it’s a lot, that’s fine. As long as you’re comfortable sharing it.” Nico whispered.
Will nodded, then continued. “Anyways, I don’t know if I’m comfy with full-on sex. Like intercourse. I just don’t see myself doing that and liking it. If we were to, I’d probably wanna be the top. God, this sounds so strange out loud…I just…don’t like things inside me? I don’t know what you prefer though. You can tell me whenever you’re ready to tell me. I just would rather do things like what we’ve tried. Where we’re somewhat clothed.”
Nico snuggled close to Will, breathing in his familiar scent. “I can tell you what some of my preferences are. I’m fine with the same stuff as you. I’m fine with more as well, but if you’re not that’s totally okay and I want you to know that. I like the things we’ve tried, they felt nice. But orgasms aren’t really the point. It’s more of the closeness with your partner, the love and affection. At least that’s what I’ve realized and want for myself and you. If you ever want to try something let me know, okay? Or if you don’t, let me know that too.”
“Okay, I will. Tonight…we could try something. Not anything too much, just something simple.”
“Okay, Love, what are you thinking for tonight?”
“Naked cuddling?” Will asked.
“Sure, we can do that tonight.”
Nico sat up and stripped to just his boxers, then Will did too.
“I’ll take my boxers off first.” Nico said, slowly taking his underwear off.
Will hesitated again for a second, scared of his scars being visible. He then took his off too, becoming fully exposed.
They both slipped under the blankets and covers and held each other tight, their chests touching.
“This is not something I’m used to.” Will mumbled into Nico’s dark, long, silky hair.
“Honestly, same. But it’s nice. You’re warm.” Nico replied.
Will laughed softly. “I know. I’m just naturally warm, I guess.”
Nico breathed deeply into Will’s chest. They ended up peacefully falling asleep.
Notes:
omg i’m so touch starved and lonely i just want what they have 😭😭
i started going to the gym this week, i’m sore but i think it could be a good escape for me
i relapsed…i was like two months clean idk what happened but back to square one for now ig :/ other than that, i’m doing okay i think. my anxiety is like awful rn too, idk why. maybe it’s the new year? school? not rlly sure.
anyways, i hope u enjoyed this chapter :) i liked writing this one a lot, and just know i always appreciate your kudos & comments! <3
Chapter 5: percy’s party
Summary:
Nico looked at his hands, fidgeting with one of the rings he was wearing.
“I’m not really…feeling that great.” Nico whispered.
“Like, you feel sick, or mental health related stuff? Or, is it something else?” Will asked quietly as Nico leaned his head on Will’s shoulder.
Notes:
hiiii!
warning for mentions of disordered eating and people drinking alcohol (if i’m missing a warning for this chap lmk pls!)
enjoy!
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
Will awoke to the soft sound of Nico’s breathing. He felt his chest go up and down and up again as they cuddled.
Will stirred, noticing it was still quite dark outside.
“Mmm?” Nico hummed.
Will whispered ‘sorry’ and gently rolled over to look at the time. 6:37am.
Nico mumbled again and reached his arm out for Will.
“Sorry, Angel.” Will murmured, rolling back over next to Nico.
Nico threw his arm over Will, hugging him.
⋆⁺₊⋆ ☀︎ ⋆⁺₊⋆
Percy said he and Annabeth were throwing a party at his apartment. Will hasn’t met Annabeth yet, so he’s excited, she seems cool.
“What are we going to wear?” Will asked Nico as he rummaged through their dresser.
“I have this outfit in mind, I just need to find the stuff for it.” He answered.
“Okay. Surprise me.”
Nico smiled and continued looking for his clothes.
Will put on a Star Wars T-shirt and baggy jeans. He put on his dirty white converse to go with.
He also grabbed his favorite worn-out bracelets his family got him on vacation in Florida one year when he was a kid. They’re kinda like emotional support bracelets.
Will sat on the couch petting Crystal while waiting for Nico.
After a moment, Nico came out of their bedroom wearing an oversized My Chemical Romance sweatshirt and his normal black jeans. He wore his massive black boots and tons of jewelry, and was putting his hair up in a ponytail while walking over to Will.
“Oh my God.” Will blurted out.
Nico grinned, finishing up his ponytail. “So…it looks good?”
“Yeah, it looks amazing.”
“Okay, good. Thanks.”
Will smiled.
⋆⁺₊⋆ ☀︎ ⋆⁺₊⋆
They knocked on Percy’s door, briefly hearing the other people inside. Hopefully they don’t disturb the neighbors.
Percy opened the door, smiling. “Hey, guys. Come in.”
Will walked inside, seeing some familiar and some new faces. He sees Annabeth, she’s leaning on the counter looking at them.
Will waved to her and she smiled.
“So, you guys can do whatever. We’re drinking in the living room. I know you guys aren’t 21 yet, but you can have one if you’d like.” Percy said.
“Cool. Thanks.” Nico answered, walking up to Will who was talking with Annabeth.
“It’s so nice to finally meet you, Will. Percy says a lot about you two. Good things.” She said with a smile.
“That’s good. I like him too. What does he say?” Will replied.
“He says stuff about how you play on the minecraft world together. I know he’s super into that game. I should play it sometime too, to be honest.”
Will grinned. “You should! There’s always room for more people.”
Annabeth laughed. “Yeah? Then I’ll definitely get on there sometime. I might play on Percy’s account until I make my own. I’ll let you know if it’s me, although you’ll probably be able to tell right away.”
Nico scoffed. “I definitely will. Percy steals from me on there all the time. I know you wouldn’t. You know, you’d probably be really into Redstone.” He said.
“Holy shit, yeah. You would.” Will added.
She smiled. “Okay, I’ll look into that.”
˚₊ ⋆ ☠︎︎ ⋆ ₊˚
Nico has this weird relationship with Percy. He’s also got a weird relationship with hot dogs, hair salons, and plastic paint brushes.
The thing is, they’re close. He can’t deny that. He saved him from his old living hellscape. So, Nico appreciates Percy for that. But, he’s kinda weird sometimes .
Weird as in he’ll act all weird and awkward for no fucking reason. Is it because in the past Nico had a grudge against him? He’s made it clear he doesn’t anymore. And he’s all overprotective about Will. That kind of pisses Nico off.
He wants to scream that he’s not a child anymore, that he’s found a loving boyfriend who doesn’t need to be inspected, or treated like he’s going to hurt Nico like other men have. He appreciates that Percy cares, but he’s not making anything better.
Does Percy need to know about all the nights Will held Nico close while he cried about his stupid fucking problems ?
Does he need to know that Will has been the best man to ever enter Nico’s life? Maybe.
Nico’s staring at Percy from across the living room. He’s drinking some sort of beer that probably tastes like ass in a bottle. He’s laughing with Piper and Annabeth and Jason, and Nico just feels like he can’t fit in with them. He feels like he fits in more with Rachel and Will.
Will is sitting on the couch, fidgeting with his bracelets and chipping at the sage green nail polish he’s wearing.
Piper is wearing a cute Sanrio tank top and she’s got pink bows at the end of her twin braids. She’s not yet 21, but she’s got a small glass of wine in her hand.
Nico sat down next to Will, listening as the others laughed and joked around about whatever.
“Hey. Wanna go to my old room?” Nico whispered to Will.
Will looked over at Nico and smiled. “Yeah, sure.”
Nico grabbed Will’s hand and led him over to his old bedroom. It was turned into a hangout/gaming room with a pullout couch and tv.
Nico closed the door and headed over to the empty couch. Will followed.
Nico leaned closer to Will, taking in his familiar comforting scent of citrus and sage.
Nico looked at his hands, fidgeting with one of the rings he was wearing.
“I’m not really…feeling that great.” Nico whispered.
“Like, you feel sick, or mental health related stuff? Or, is it something else?” Will asked quietly as Nico leaned his head on Will’s shoulder.
“I dunno. Can you feel under my shirt?
“Uh, sure. Here.” Will positioned Nico so he was on top of his lap and held his back with one arm, and the other slowly touching under Nico’s sweatshirt.
Will paused for a moment, a thinking expression on his face.
“…ribs. And hip bones? They’re very prominent, I feel them.”
Nico nodded, sniffling. “Have you noticed most of my food in the fridge is untouched lately?”
Will then moved both his arms under Nico’s sweatshirt, hugging him. “Yeah. Is it getting bad again?” Will asked softly.
“I-I…yeah, I think so. I don’t know why. I was doing so well.”
Will gently kissed Nico’s cheek. “You’re still trying. That’s all that matters. You’re strong. You’re brave. I know you’ll get through this.”
Nico hugged Will tight. “I know. Your support helps. Nobody else knows about my eating except you and my therapist.”
“Who are the other people you’d want to know?” Will asked, rubbing circles on Nico’s back.
“…Annabeth. She’s smart, she would know ways to help and support me. Rachel, she’s close with us and I know she’s studying mental health type stuff. That’s…it.”
“Okay, I just wanted to know. Uhm, do you want to watch something on the TV?”
“Star Wars. Although we’ll have to watch it again because I probably won’t be focusing much on the movie tonight.” Nico whispered.
“Alright, I’ll see if they have Disney Plus.”
Will started up Star Wars: A New Hope and continued to hold Nico close. The main lights were off, only a small lamp, the fairy lights, and the TV on.
After a while, they started dozing off to sleep. At some point the door opened and the overhead light turned on, interrupting them.
“There they are. Lovebirds, hey, we’re heading to Piper’s. You can come if you want.” A drunk Percy explained.
“Mmmm. We’ll go home, I think.” Will said, turning off the TV and helping a sleepy Nico stand up.
“Alright, see you guys later. You can leave whenever. You have your set of keys.”
“Mhm. See y’all. Have fun.” Will replied as the group left the apartment.
“Hey. Wanna go?” Will asked Nico.
“Yeah. First let me have a sip of whatever they were drinking. I wanna taste how awful it is.”
Will laughed. “‘Kay.”
Nico picked up the leftover bottle of beer Percy had, wiped off his leftover saliva that was on the top and took a sip.
Nico immediately spit it out. “Jesus Christ. That tastes like ass. Tell me why he drank that willingly.”
“Dunno. Percy is strange. Let’s go home now.” Will said, putting his shoes back on.
“Hey, uh, wanna stop at CVS on the way home?”
“Sure.”
⋆⁺₊⋆ ☀︎ ⋆⁺₊⋆
They walked in the chilly night air to the CVS that was on their way home. They walked in, Nico leading them along.
“So, what do you need?” Will asked, holding Nico’s hand.
“New eyeliner. But we can look around if you’d like.”
Will nodded, letting go of Nico’s hand and wandering over to the condoms.
He just stood there, thinking if he should get some. In case he does wanna try something.
It’s so fucking confusing. He wants it but he doesn’t. He feels it but he doesn’t. Can’t it just be one or the other? Jesus Christ , he thinks.
He decides to text Rachel. Why? He doesn’t know. She always has some good advice, Will doesn’t know where she gets it from.
Rachel 😛
10:45pm
Omg Rach…Olease I need some advice wuickly !!!
oh man what is it? it’s not like u to spell simple words wrong wills
I’m fuckin..standing here in CVS do i buy condoms or no. I don’t even know if I want sex but..
hmm..i mean, it’s always good to have some. maybe get a small box? if you don’t use them you can donate them.
Okay thanks. But Nico will see me buy them then what
WILL he’s not gonna care i promise u. grab the box i know ur staring at it just grab it
[one image attached]
these?
wills i don’t know shit about the brands sorry love just get those they look fine!!
Okay thank you ❤️ I’m gonna get them I think..
get them. 😘
—
“Hey, found you. I found my eyeliner.” Nico said, Will jumped.
“Oh. Sorry I scared you. You’re gonna get those?” Nico looked at the box.
“Uhm, yeah, I think so. In case…I want to, I dunno.” Will said quietly.
“Okay. Are you ready to check out?”
Will nodded.
Notes:
i didn’t go very in detail on annabeth’s appearance on purpose, i wanted people to be able to imagine her however they’d like without me saying anything specific about her; like her ethnicity, hair style, etc. i imagine her in multiple different ways so yeah, i hope u understand!
GUYS. I MADE A FRIEND AT YOUTH GROUP. he might be reading this at some point since i gave him my AO3 lolll! if so, hiii!!
i also introduced myself to the whole group (name and pronouns) i’m so happy it’s going better for me, thank you to everyone who’s been giving me advice and support. i appreciate it sm :)
so that being said, i’m doing a lot better than i was earlier this week. i went to the gym again and thats going well too.
thank you for reading this chapter, see u next week! <33
Chapter 6: doubtful
Summary:
Will put his knees to his chest. “I guess..I just want to make him happy.”
“You do make him happy. William, get that stupid internalized acephobia out of your head. Nico told you he doesn’t care that you don’t have sex. That’s not what makes him happy and that’s not what he wants from you. Please hear me out.”
Will frowned. “I understand…it’s just..usually that’s what people in relationships want, right?”
Notes:
hi
this is the chapter with the masturbation scene, it’s quick and not very detailed BUT if you’d like to skip it, stop at: “Nico decided to try the latter. He doesn’t need Will worrying about him.” and continue at: “Nico walked out of the bathroom with a towel around his waist. Will looked up from his phone to glance at him.”
warning for mentions of sh & thoughts of it (idk how to explain the warning, basically nico thinks abt self harming!!) and for internalized acephobia (as always if you think i should put a warning for something that’s not listed pls lmk.)
enjoy!!
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
Will decided to stay the night at Rachel’s, it was a random Friday in February. Nico was dealing with stuff at his job tonight, so he was busy.
Will sat at the edge of Rachel’s bed. He was wearing boxers and an oversized t-shirt. There was incense burning, and Rachel was downstairs picking up their pizza delivery.
Will took a deep breath. He feels so anxious, he doesn’t know why. He just took his meds. He’s waiting for them to kick in.
Rachel came back holding a large pizza box. She set it on the bed, opening it.
A large, greasy cheese pizza should help Will forget his problems for the night, right?
Rachel wore low-rise Sailor Moon pajama pants and a white tank top. She had an Evil Eye necklace on.
“Hey. Will. You okay?” Rachel asked, sitting across from him on the bed.
Will nodded. “Mhm. Sorry.”
Rachel sighed. “Wills. What’s up? My Best Friend Intuition is tingling, it’s telling me you’re not fine and need someone to talk to. I’m all ears.”
Will sat with his legs crossed, tapping his knee. “Uhm. Nico and I have experimented with some stuff but..I don’t know how to explain it. I kinda want to try sex but I’m scared of it. I don’t like the idea of it. It’s not very appealing, to be honest. But I want it sometimes and I feel attracted to Nico sometimes but, like, the idea of sex is not my thing.”
Rachel nodded. “Okay. So…do you feel horny sometimes? I know your libido isn’t strong whatsoever, you’ve told me that, but you want sex sometimes? Is that right?”
“With Nico, yeah. Y’know how people feel it with strangers? I don’t. Only Nico. I guess that’s ‘cause I’m demi. But then another part of me is gray-ace, where I only feel the sexual attraction at random times very rarely. It’s so confusin’.”
Rachel took a bite of her pizza slice. “Hmm. Yeah, I see why you’re confused. Just do what you and your boyfriend are comfy with. If you like what you currently do, then you don’t need to go further if that's not what you’re comfortable doing. And no, Nico doesn’t care that you don’t have sex. He probably told you that before right? He told me, too.”
Will put his knees to his chest. “I guess..I just want to make him happy.”
“You do make him happy. William, get that stupid internalized acephobia out of your head. Nico told you he doesn’t care that you don’t have sex. That’s not what makes him happy and that’s not what he wants from you. Please hear me out.”
Will frowned. “I understand…it’s just..usually that’s what people in relationships want, right?”
“Sometimes. But not Nico and You. You two don’t need that to be happy and satisfied and I think that’s really important.”
Will smiled, eating his pizza. “Yeah. I think…I’ll stick to what we already do for now.”
Rachel grinned. “See? Do what makes you both comfy and happy.”
Will nodded.
˚₊ ⋆ ☠︎︎ ⋆ ₊˚
Nico is sick and tired of his shitty retail job at Macy’s. He's tired of people giving him bullshit everyday, he doesn’t get paid enough for this.
Today, a lady who’s name was probably (most definitely) Karen had to make some stupid comment about his gay flag pin.
Then, he had an issue with a co-worker harassing him, so he quit. Nico now feels useless.
He’s not in the mood to look for new jobs right now, he honestly just wants to take a bath and chill.
“Hey, Amore. I’m taking a bath. I need to decompress.” Nico told Will as he laid on their bed.
“Okay. If you need anything, yell my name.” Will answered.
Nico undressed and got in the warm water. He tried to relax. He closed his eyes, breathing in and out.
1, 2, 3.
1, 2, 3.
God, this is barely working for him. Nico took a shaky breath, glancing at the razor that hung on the shower wall.
No. Don’t fucking think about it, Nico , he thought.
Will is laying on their bed right outside this door.
‘Yell if you need me’, he had said.
Does he need him? Does he seriously need his boyfriend to get him out of this bathtub or move the razor because he’s that fucked up?
He doesn’t want to kill himself. He just wants to relieve some stress. But, then why doesn’t he just masturbate or something? He’s already naked.
Nico decided to try the latter. He doesn’t need Will worrying about him.
Nico slowly moved his hand down, touching his crotch under the water. It felt nice. He started rubbing it slowly, moving his hips back and forth.
He continued to move his hips back and forth and hump the air while rubbing and touching his genitals. Yeah. This works, this is fine.
It started feeling even better, that’s when he covered his mouth with one hand. Will doesn’t need to hear him moaning in the bathtub.
He made some noises, he hoped you could barely hear them outside of the room.
He started thrusting and that’s when the electric-like feeling started lingering.
“Fuck,” He whispered.
He thrusted and thrusted again and rubbed more until the orgasmic feeling became part of him.
Then he finished. God, it felt nice. He moaned again and quickly covered his mouth.
He closed his eyes and leaned back in the bathtub.
“Oh my God..” Nico mumbled.
Nico walked out of the bathroom with a towel around his waist. Will looked up from his phone to glance at him.
“Hey. I feel better.” Nico said, sitting at the edge of the bed near Will’s feet.
“That’s good.” Will said with a smile. Does he know?
“To be honest, I don’t have it in me to get dressed. Can I lay here like this?”
“Sure. I don’t mind.” Will said gently.
Nico crawled under the covers next to Will, taking his towel off.
“Whatcha doing?” Nico asked, cuddling next to Will.
“Watching Dr. Pimple Popper.”
“Oh,” Nico laughed, “kinda gross? Or oddly satisfying?”
“Both.”
Nico smiled, reaching his hand out for Will’s. Will noticed and squeezed his boyfriend’s hand.
“The other day, when I went to Rachel’s, we talked about stuff.” Will said softly.
“What specific stuff?” Nico asked.
“Uhm, can I ask you somethin’?”
“Of course.”
“Do you want sex in our relationship?”
Nico moved to face Will. “Not if you don’t. I told you this already, Love. I don’t need sex from you if you don’t need it from me. I like how we are. Non-sexual intimacy is better. For us. I don’t know, it’s just how we are. And like I said before, if you wanna keep trying things out that’s perfectly fine. But don’t force yourself to do something you’re not comfortable with.”
Will smiled and cuddled Nico. “Rachel said something similar. I understand now.”
Nico smiled wide and kissed Will.
Notes:
will bb pls listen to ur best friend and bf
no but like genuinely, for a while, i rlly struggled with internalized ace&aro-phobia, i knew i was on both spectrums but it was so confusing and for a moment it felt like nobody understood my identity. i’m happy to say that i have supportive parents and my mom’s friends are also super supportive of me. so that’s nice. (my mom and i hang out with them a lot lol)
will is clearly still struggling to accept this part of himself. i feel like it has to do with the fact that he feels like he’s not good enough for nico. even tho nico’s let him know it doesn’t bother him whatsoever, and that he loves him all the same no matter what, because he’s a good loving bf!!! don’t worry, will is eventually going to realize his identity is valid and okay. it’s just gonna take a while, because i want this fic to be realistic.
ANYWAY, onto my life updates..not really much to say this time, i’m rlly nervous about school since my grades are…not the best, and i’m still behind in some classes. my semester ends soon idk what i'm gonna do lol…
i hope you enjoyed this chapter :) next chap later this week!!
Chapter 7: nico’s doctor appointment
Summary:
“Nico?” He heard after a bit. He got up and followed the nurse into a small room.
The overhead lights were so bright it hurt Nico’s eyes. He hates the doctors.
“Please take your shoes off, I’m going to need your height and weight.” The nurse said, holding a clipboard.
Nico nodded, taking his black converse off. He's not looking forward to having to put them back on again.
Notes:
hii
warning for eating disorder tendencies, nico’s exact weight is shown, sh/suicidal thoughts
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
Nico was currently walking to his doctor’s appointment.
An anxious pit rose in his stomach. He’s going to have to tell the truth. He can’t lie this time, not with his ribcage making itself visible under his sweater, and definitely not with his weight having gone down a noticeable amount.
Nico trembled as he grabbed the door handle to the office. He walked up to the front desk, checking in.
“Niccolò di Angelo, I’m here to see Dr. Wilson.” He said nervously.
“Okay, you can have a seat and wait for her.” The receptionist said.
Nico went and sat by a poster that had a picture of a rubber duck wearing sunglasses with the words ‘Everything is Going to be Okay!’
He glanced at the TV, which was playing some home renovation channel.
“Nico?” He heard after a bit. He got up and followed the nurse into a small room.
The overhead lights were so bright it hurt Nico’s eyes. He hates the doctors.
“Please take your shoes off, I’m going to need your height and weight.” The nurse said, holding a clipboard.
Nico nodded, taking his black converse off. He's not looking forward to having to put them back on again.
Nico stepped on the scale, staring at the little screen with the numbers. After a moment, the number landed on 117. He gulped.
“Hmm. Okay, please stand under this.” She said, adjusting the height measurer.
Nico stood under it, his whole
body sweating.
“5’8. Nico, what are some of your eating habits like?” The nurse asked, motioning for Nico to sit back on the cot.
“Uhm. I eat two meals a day.” He said.
She nodded, taking notes. “And what do those meals look like?”
“Toast with butter in the morning. I also have yogurt and some sausage some days. Dinner is anything, but I don’t eat all of it.”
“Mhm, okay. Snacks?”
“I don’t really eat snacks.”
She nodded, jotting down more notes. The sound of the pen gliding across the paper annoyed Nico. So did the crinkly paper he was sitting on.
The nurse checked his blood pressure and heartbeat, then left the room for Dr. Wilson to start.
˚₊ ⋆ ☠︎︎ ⋆ ₊˚
After a bit, there was a soft knock on the door and Dr. Wilson entered the room. She smiled at Nico, her smile lines showing.
She was short, with dark brown hair and pale skin. Nico hasn’t seen her in a bit.
“Hello, Nico. So, your weight…I want you to try eating more, and maybe try finishing some meals? Can you try that for me?” She said, smiling as she sat in the swivel stool near the sink.
“Yeah. I can try.” Nico replied, his heart beating out of his chest.
“Okay, great. I have some simple questions for you. Have you felt depressed lately? Anxious?”
Nico nodded. “Yeah, uhm, yeah.”
“Okay. Have you had thoughts of killing and or hurting yourself? In the past month?”
“Yeah.” Nico said quietly.
“Hm, okay. Do I need to talk with your psychiatrist and therapist about increasing meds?”
“Probably.”
Dr. Wilson nodded, writing down the answers on her clipboard.
“Okay, Nico, today we’re doing a physical. I know what you’re gonna say, and I’m sorry. But, you haven’t gotten one since you were 18. You’re 20 now, it’s due. I’m going to give you a gown and you can change in here by yourself. You can keep your underwear and socks on.”
“Okay.” Nico answered as Dr. Wilson set a gown next to Nico and left the room.
Fucking hell. This sucks, he thought.
Nico quickly changed into the gown, setting his clothes on the cot next to him.
After a moment, that soft knock came back and Dr. Wilson entered the room again, standing in front of Nico.
“Alright. I’m going to start by feeling your stomach and back, is that okay?” She asked.
Does he really have a choice? He nodded.
Nico stood up and Dr. Wilson gently patted Nico’s stomach, chest, and back.
“Okay. Nothing out of the ordinary, but your ribs and spine are too visible. That’s one reason I want you to eat more, okay?” Dr. Wilson said.
“Okay.” He answered.
“You said you’re not feeling the best mentally? I notice you’ve got some more scars on your upper arms since last time we met.”
“Uhm, yeah. I haven’t cut in over a month, though.”
She smiled. “That’s good. Keep that up.”
˚₊ ⋆ ☠︎︎ ⋆ ₊˚
Nico was back from the doctor. He walked into their apartment, wanting to see Crystal and Will again.
Speaking of that, there they both were, cuddled together on the bed. How cute.
“Will? I’m back.” Nico said as he entered the bedroom.
Will smiled. “Great, how’d it go?”
Nico took a deep breath, then let it out. “It went pretty good, I guess.”
“That’s good. Want to join us?”
Nico nodded, crawling into the bed and snuggling up with his boyfriend and Crystal.
He eventually fell asleep.
Notes:
tbh i don’t feel that well mentally (and physically) rn, idk why.
i’m moving soon which is nice, the apartment im in now kinda sucks but the new house is so nice and cozy, i can’t wait to live there by hopefully next month! it’ll be nice to be in a cozy house with my mom and cats, plus it’s closer to the pride center i go to. so ig i have that to look forward to, but for some reason i still
feel kinda hopeless? lonely? a mix of both?my sense of stability rn has been taking baths. last night i felt bad and started crying so i took a bath and i felt better. idk how it always manages to make me feel at least a little better every time.
anyways, i hope u enjoyed this chapter :) next chap is one of my faves so far, it’s so soft and so THEM.
Chapter 8: “i love you”
Summary:
Will smiled softly, wiping the tears from Nico’s cheek. “If you believe and try, it will happen. Right now, I want you to eat this,” Will grabbed a small red candy bar from his pocket.
“A Kit Kat?” Nico asked, taking the chocolate from Will.
“Mhm. And this,” Will handed Nico a small bottle of Gatorade. The blue flavor.
Notes:
helloo!!
warning for eating disorders (throwing up and such)
enjoy :)
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
Nico sat at the edge of the bed, counting his new medication.
One antidepressant, three anxiety pills, and one pill to help him sleep better. The doctor said it also helps him gain weight, and Nico’s slightly uncomfortable with that. He takes it anyway, though.
He took a sip of the glass of water on the nightstand and swallowed all of his pills. He then plopped down next to Will on the bed, laying on his back.
Nico wore a black fuzzy sweater and sleep boxers. There were some mysterious bruises that had formed on his legs near his knees. He has no idea where they came from, he just woke up with them.
He got under the covers and eventually fell asleep.
˚₊ ⋆ ☠︎︎ ⋆ ₊˚
Nico silently sobbed as he dry heaved into the toilet. It kept going until he eventually threw up the food he had eaten earlier that day.
The food Will and him made together. The food he loved making with his boyfriend.
Nico quietly sobbed and leaned back onto the bathroom floor.
He laid there, staring at the ceiling.
After a while, there was a soft knock on the door. Will .
“Hey, Angel, are you alright? Take your time, I just want to make sure you’re okay. Please answer.” He said.
Nico almost started crying again. “Will…I’m here.” Nico answered quietly.
Will must’ve let out a deep breath he was holding. “Can I come in?”
Nico quickly flushed the bile down the toilet and answered with a small ‘yes.’
Will slowly opened the door, rushing to Nico who was sitting against the wall.
Will hugged his boyfriend tight. It felt like he didn’t want to ever let go.
Will sniffed. “Are you doing okay? You look sick.”
“I..I feel like I’m gonna pass out.”
“I’m going to get you a glass of water, be right back. Stay with me, okay?”
Nico nodded.
After less than a minute Will came back with a half empty glass of water and handed it to Nico.
“That was fast.” Nico whispered.
“It was the one I was drinking, it was on the nightstand.”
Nico nodded again, taking sips of the water.
“Is there anything you need me to do for you?” Will asked, gently rubbing Nico’s cheek with his thumb.
“Will…I’m…I threw up the food we made.”
“Did you throw up on purpose?” Will asked gently.
Nico’s eyes started watering. “I, uhm, I..yeah. I’m fucking sick . I threw up the food I loved just because it felt like too much.”
“Can you look at me and listen closely?” Will asked, holding Nico’s face. Their faces were almost touching. Nico nodded.
“Angel, I need you to reach out to someone when you feel like this. Truly. You have your therapist’s number, right? Call him. Call him, or talk to me, or something. I don’t want you to feel like this. I don’t want you to feel alone.”
A tear fell down Nico’s cheek. “I will. I swear on everything, I will. I don’t want to live like this anymore. I want to get better.”
Will smiled softly, wiping the tears from Nico’s cheek. “If you believe and try, it will happen. Right now, I want you to eat this,” Will grabbed a small red candy bar from his pocket.
“A Kit Kat?” Nico asked, taking the chocolate from Will.
“Mhm. And this,” Will handed Nico a small bottle of Gatorade. The blue flavor.
“Can you at least eat the Kit Kat and drink this Gatorade?” Will asked softly.
“Yeah.” Nico opened the Kit Kat bar and started eating it.
Will smiled, squeezing Nico’s arm. “I love you. I love you so much.”
Nico was done with the chocolate, and kissed Will’s forehead. “I love you too. I don’t want to lose you. I will get better. That’s a promise I will keep.”
“I know. You’re already making progress, and I’m so so proud.” Will hugged his boyfriend.
˚₊ ⋆ ☠︎︎ ⋆ ₊˚
Nico pulled the shower curtain, letting the warm water fall onto his dark hair that now went well past his shoulders.
This was nice. He doesn’t want to look at his body.
Nico washed his hair, then rinsed it out.
There was a knock on the door. Will.
“May I come in for a second?” He asked behind the door.
Nico pulled the curtain back and poked his head out. “Yeah.”
Will walked in, closing the door behind him. “I just wanted to use the bathroom.”
Nico nodded, continuing his shower.
After a moment, when Will was finished, Nico had an idea. He poked his head out again.
“Hey Will?” He asked quietly.
“Yeah?”
“Can you, uh, get in with me? Only if you want to. I just want some comfort.”
“Sure, here, let me undress.”
Will got in the shower, joining Nico.
“What do you want me to do?” Will asked, gently holding Nico’s wrist.
“Just…I dunno. Come here.”
Nico pulled Will in a tight hug, kissing the freckles on his face.
After a bit, the water started getting cold. Nico pulled away and turned the water off, then went back to hug Will again.
“I think I’m touch starved.” Nico said with a small laugh.
Will smiled. “You can have my touch, if you want.”
“Of course I want it. I actually only want it from you .”
“Awe. Let’s get out.” Will said, grabbing a towel for them both.
They got out of the shower, dried off, then put their underwear on.
Will stood there for a moment, staring at Nico. His eyes traveled all around.
“ Will. ” Nico said after a brief moment.
Will’s eyes shot back up to Nico’s face. “Sorry.”
Nico laughed. “You know I don’t care, right? This view is for William Andrew Solace only. Last time I checked, that was your name.”
Will scoffed. “I know, I just…it’s strange, I dunno. I know I’m allowed to look but it feels weird. I don’t know if that makes sense or not.”
Nico stood closer to Will, looking into his eyes. “It does. I get what you mean. What do you wanna do now?”
Will looked away for a moment, then looked back at Nico. “I…uhm…I want to touch you…and I want your touch back. But..I don’t know exactly what. I just know that’s what I want.”
Nico cupped Will’s face in his hands. “Yeah? Let’s go to the couch? Does that work?”
Will nodded. “Mhm.”
⋆⁺₊⋆ ☀︎ ⋆⁺₊⋆
Will sat down on the couch. Nico crawled on top of him, sitting in his lap. They just had boxers on, so Will grabbed a soft and fuzzy blanket and covered them with it.
Nico kissed Will’s lips, hugging his neck. His hips moved back and forth with the kisses.
Will softly ran his fingers down Nico’s arms, careful around the scars. Then he gently held his waist, the tips of his fingers under Nico’s boxer lining.
This felt nice, Will thinks. There’s no intercourse, so it’s not making Will uncomfortable.
“Can I touch you here?” Will asked, moving his hands farther under Nico’s boxers and towards his ass.
“Yeah. That’s fine.” Nico answered.
They continued making out for a bit, then they both pulled back, panting.
Will lifted his hands back up to Nico’s waist. “I love you.”
Nico smiled as he softly kissed the scattered freckles on Will’s neck.
Will huffed, leaning into the touch. “This feels nice.” He whispered.
“Mhm.” Nico hummed, relaxing into Will’s arms.
Notes:
hello everyone, i’m feeling a little better? maybe.
i guess i just feel really lonely? like, i don’t really talk to people and hang out with people and i just feel really alone sometimes.
i’m stuck at home for now because there’s an awful snow storm near me and the roads are bad. they’re all snowy and icy. my internet went out yesterday i think cause of the storm and it was just a mess lmao.
anyways, i hope you enjoyed this chapter! have a good day/night and see you again soon for the next update!! :)
Chapter 9: affection
Summary:
Will took a sip of his soup. “Your face to start, your big cute doe eyes—“
Nico scoffed. “What does that even mean?”
“You’re just a big cutie. The piercings, makeup, tattoos, and jewelry don’t fool me.” Will said, smirking.
Notes:
hey!!
warning for self harm/suicidal thoughts and tendencies
enjoy :)
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
Will felt like shit. He hasn’t felt this hopeless in a while. He feels borderline suicidal, he knows he needs to talk to Nico.
Nico sat in the living room, painting. Will slowly got up and walked to the doorway, knocking gently to get his boyfriend’s attention.
“Hey.” Will said quietly.
Nico looked up from his artwork. “Hey…what’s the matter?”
“I…I feel bad. I don’t know what to do or who to talk to.”
Nico got up from his seat and hugged Will tight. “Amore…how bad?”
“Bad enough to hurt myself.” Will choked.
“What do you think will help?”
“I don’t know. I want to cuddle.”
Nico smiled softly. “Okay, here. I’m gonna get you some soup and we can cuddle and chat. Does that sound okay?”
Will nodded. “Yes.”
Will laid on the bed, snuggled under the covers. He sat up when Nico came to him with a bowl of soup.
“Here, Love. Let me join.” Nico said as he handed Will the bowl and slipped under the covers next to him.
“Thank you.” Will answered.
“‘Course. I thought it’d make you feel a bit better.”
Nico snuggled up with Will, breathing in his scent again. He likes it.
“So, what do you wanna talk about? Something to help get your mind off of the negative.” Nico whispered to Will.
Will grinned. “How cute you are.”
“What? I’m not—“
“Angel, don’t start with that. You’re adorable.”
Nico couldn’t help but smile. “Okay, what do you wanna say about that?”
Will took a sip of his soup. “Your face to start, your big cute doe eyes—“
Nico scoffed. “What does that even mean?”
“You’re just a big cutie. The piercings, makeup, tattoos, and jewelry don’t fool me.” Will said, smirking.
Nico laughed. “I mean, obviously . I don’t think a stranger would see me like that.”
“I know. I’m just saying that they have no idea. I like that about you. I also like the bump on your nose and the beauty marks on your face and neck. It’s all so pretty—”
Nico smiled, his face feeling hot. “Will..”
“—and you can’t tell me otherwise about this last one. Your body is so beautiful. I want you to continue trying to gain weight, but I also want you to know your body is gorgeous, okay? When you have a little tummy from eating dinner it’s so cute and squishy. And, your butt is cute.” Will said, setting his finished soup on the nightstand.
“ Will! Stop, I am going to cry.”
“You know what I said is true, right?”
“I know you’re not lying. I just…it’s hard for me to see myself that way sometimes.”
Will nodded, pulling Nico closer.
⋆⁺₊⋆ ☀︎ ⋆⁺₊⋆
“Will, what are you doing??” Rachel asked, examining his arms.
“I’m sorry.” Will whispered.
Rachel sat down in front of Will, gently holding his bruised arms.
“Look at me.” Rachel said softly, staring into Will’s eyes.
Will hesitated before looking back at her.
“You need to stop doing this to feel better. It doesn’t actually make you feel any better, does it?”
Will shook his head. “For a moment it does. Then, I feel like shit again.”
“Then, Wills, it’s not a good coping mechanism. Try something else, like, drawing. Or, talk to someone, stim, workout. Just do something else that helps. ‘Cause this clearly doesn’t.”
“I know..” Will mumbled.
“I’m gonna put some ointment on the bruises. Then, I’m telling Nico.” Rachel said, grabbing the ointment from her cabinet.
“ Fine. ” Will said, sounding meaner than he wanted.
Rachel paused and looked back at him.
“You don’t want him to know.” She said, and it wasn’t a question.
“No, I don’t. He’s already worried enough about me. I don’t want him to stress about me. I’m fine .”
Rachel hummed, rubbing Will’s lower arms with ointment. “I really don’t think you are, though, Will.”
“ But—”
“ Will. You are not fine, otherwise I wouldn’t be treating these bruises you gave yourself. I also wouldn’t have extra bandaids in my bathroom for when you hurt yourself. Don’t argue.”
Will stared at his lap, not saying anything. “I’m so sorry, Rach. You’re right. I’m just trying to find excuses because I’m addicted. You know what that’s like, right? To want help, but when you’re offered it, you try not to accept it. It’s fucked up.”
Rachel nodded. “I know, I know. You’re just upset right now. That’s normal. I need you to listen to me though, because I don’t want you coming here like this again.” She said softly.
“I won’t, I swear. I’m going to see my therapist again soon. I’ll let it all out to her. I’m going to try.”
“Yes, that’s the spirit. Try, that’s all you need to do right now.”
Will laughed lightly. “Yeah.”
“You should tell Nico. You know he’s gonna notice the bruises.”
“I know. I hate not telling him things. That’s why I tell him basically everything.”
“Then you gotta tell him,” Rachel added.
“I will when I get home.”
“Good, good. See? Progress already.”
Will smiled.
⋆⁺₊⋆ ☀︎ ⋆⁺₊⋆
“Nico? I’m home now.” Will said, setting his backpack on the floor and walking towards the bedroom.
“Hey.” Nico replied, looking up from his sketchbook.
“Have fun at Rachel’s?” He asked, setting his sketchbook and pencil down.
“Uhm, yeah, I guess. I hurt myself at school today.”
Nico’s face changed. “Amore. Talk to me about it, please.”
Will sat on the bed, rubbing his eyes and sighing. “I had a test and I probably failed, so I got upset and went to the bathroom and hit myself.”
“Where?” Nico asked gently.
Will pulled up his hoodie sleeves to show the bruises.
Nico glanced at them, then back at Will’s face. “Love, you have to stop that.”
“I know…I am. Starting today. No more self harm.”
Nico smiled. “Good. I’m on that journey too. We can be on it together.”
Will nodded. “Okay. I like that idea.”
⋆⁺₊⋆ ☀︎ ⋆⁺₊⋆
Rachel 😛
2:38 pm
Hey are you able to chat for a bit on here?
yeah, what’s up?
I’m just, I’m sorry for snapping at you yesterday.
it’s fine, will, i’m not mad at you.
You’re sure?
yes. do i need to come over?
No
i’m calling you one sec
Will’s phone rang, 22 by Taylor Swift playing as his ringtone. He quickly answered.
‘Hello? Rachel?’
‘Hi, Will.’
‘What are you calling for?’
‘I was just worried about you. Are you doing okay right now?’
‘Yeah,’
‘Okay. Good. That’s what I wanted to know. See you later.’
‘Bye. Love you.’
‘Love ya too. Bye.’
Rachel ended the call, and Will just sat there, staring at the ceiling.
Notes:
sorry for the late chapter, i was gonna post on thursday/friday but i had some health issues where i couldn’t really do much of anything.
i was having awful headaches all over my head that wouldn’t go away, i went to the doctor and she said to stop taking pain meds (i was taking them multiple times a day) because it was actually making them worse. it sucked for a few days not having anything to help my awful headaches but its now currently saturday night for me and my headache is gone :))))
also updates might be a little slow for the next like, week or two, i need to finish editing the next chapter and then i don't have much written after that, (i couldn’t write much during the headaches) BUT i have some ideas so ill be writing when i can :D
my moving process is going good, its winter for me and the snow is piling up like crazy, so moving stuff back and forth has been a struggle this week. all i want rn is a nice sunny day where its a little bit warmer than, like, 10 degrees lollll.
i hope you enjoyed this chapter, have a good day/night <3 i appreciate you guys so much for commenting and supporting my work!! 💗
Chapter 10: mine
Summary:
Nico laughed. “You? Asking if we can get Mcdonald’s? Is this Will or a clone?”
Will grinned. “It’s Will. Your boyfriend. I’m not a clone.”
Notes:
hi!
warning for slight eating disorder tendencies and mention of sh
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
Nico sat on the couch snuggled up with Will. They were watching some random show on the TV. Nico wasn’t paying much attention, though.
“So, uh, what you said about my body? You’re telling the truth?” Nico asked Will.
Will looked down at him and smiled. “Of course I’m telling the truth. I would never lie about that.”
Nico breathed in, then out. “It’s just…what you said made me feel better about my stomach after I eat. I also thought it was funny that you went from calling me a cutie to calling my ass hot. The duality..”
Will laughed and shook his head. “ Okay, I didn’t call it hot. ”
“That’s definitely what you were thinking. I saw it on your face, Will.” Nico said with a laugh.
“Alright, yeah, I think you’re cute and hot. At the same time. That includes your ass.”
Nico smiled. “Thank you.”
“And…I’m glad I could help you feel better about your body. Even if it’s something so simple.”
Nico lifted his art program sweatshirt and showed his tummy.
Will grinned. “See? So cute. Can I touch you?”
“Yeah.”
Will gently touched Nico’s stomach, wrapping his arms around Nico’s waist. “So cute and squishy..”
“Amore…”
“Hm?”
“I think your tummy is cute too. I know you don’t like how you look most of the time, but you’re so fucking cute .”
Will snuggled closer to Nico and smiled softly.
˚₊ ⋆ ☠︎︎ ⋆ ₊˚
Nico laid down under the covers, basically laying on top of Will.
“Hmm?” Will whispered when he felt Nico stir.
“Sorry.” Nico replied.
Will rolled over so he was facing his boyfriend. “I’m awake.” He said.
Nico stayed in the position he was in, hugging Will. “M’kay.”
“Let me see those bruises.” Nico murmured, reaching for Will’s arm.
Will sighed, letting Nico look over his almost healed arm. The bruises were faint and yellow.
“They’re doing good. That’s good.” Nico said with a smile.
“Yeah. I’m tryin’.”
Nico nodded, letting go of Will’s arm.
They both laid there in silence for a moment, neither one saying anything.
“Want to Doordash Mcdonald’s?” Will asked after a moment.
Nico laughed. “ You ? Asking if we can get Mcdonald’s ? Is this Will or a clone?”
Will grinned. “It’s Will. Your boyfriend. I’m not a clone.”
“Okay. Yes, I want Mcdonald’s. Why do you suddenly want Mcdonald’s?”
“Not sure. Some greasy food sounds good. I know you like Mcdonald’s.”
“Okay. I’m getting the app open.”
⋆⁺₊⋆ ☀︎ ⋆⁺₊⋆
Nico stared at his cheeseburger, not taking a bite.
Will looked over at him, sitting across from him on their bed.
“Angel..” Will whispered.
Nico glanced back at Will, picking up his burger and taking a bite. “I’m fine, I think.”
“Just..eat as much as you want, alright? I don’t want you to be hungry.”
Nico nodded, eating more of his food.
After they were done eating, they cuddled in bed.
“I guess tonight’s a cozy one?” Will asked.
“Mhm. I actually…uhm…I want your touch.” Nico whispered into Will’s chest.
“Okay. How would you like it?”
Nico gently grabbed Will’s hand and set it on top of his head.
Will smiled. “You want me to touch your hair?”
Nico nodded, closing his eyes and breathing in Will’s scent again and again, because it’s just so comforting and familiar. That’s just how Nico likes things to be.
Will started gently combing out Nico’s hair, as there were some small knots starting to form.
Nico mumbled something in Italian that Will couldn’t understand. It didn’t matter though, Will could probably guess what he said.
“Mmm..can you…?” Nico mumbled, gently grabbing Will’s hand and placing it under his sweater.
“‘Course, darlin’, what would you like?” Will murmured into Nico’s ear.
“Just, I like your touch.”
“Okay.” Will answered, rubbing soft circles around Nico’s stomach.
They laid there for a bit, only hearing their breathing and the sound of Crystal purring beside them.
Nico eventually fell asleep, softly snoring. Will hoped he was having a good dream.
⋆⁺₊⋆ ☀︎ ⋆⁺₊⋆
Will woke up to a sleepy Nico stirring beside him.
“Are you awake?” Nico whispered.
“Mhm.” Will hummed in response.
“I had a weird dream.” Nico said just above a whisper.
Will moved so he was facing Nico. “What kinda dream?”
“I dunno. It was just like, one of those weird fever dreams you get even if you’re not sick.”
Will nodded. “I get those too sometimes. I actually have something for you.”
Will reached over to the nightstand and pulled out a purple bracelet from the drawer. He handed it to Nico.
“What is this?” He asked, examining it.
“Amethyst, it helps with dreams and anxiety. Rachel gave it to me a while back.”
Nico nodded, smiling, and slipped the bracelet on his wrist.
“Tell me if it helps. Rachel’s got tons of stuff like that. You can ask her about crystals, if you want one that does something specific.” Will said.
“Cool. So she’s spiritual? I’ve seen her wear stuff but I didn’t really understand..”
“Yeah. She honestly got me more into that stuff. It’s pretty interesting. It also helps you understand yourself more.”
Nico nodded, grabbing for Will’s hand.
“Whatcha wanna do today?” Nico asked.
“Hmmm. Wanna get some food and see some shops?”
“Sure. I haven’t been out shopping in a bit. I’ve been saving my money for nothing, really, I guess I just got nervous after quitting my job.”
“Mhm. That’s totally understandable. I used to get super nervous about spending money on things I enjoyed, like hobbies. Rachel helped me realize it’s okay to wanna spend some money on yourself. Get yourself something nice every once in a while, y’know? Like a nice meal, new outfit, tattoo, etcetera.”
Nico nodded again, taking a deep breath out. “There’s this shirt I’ve been wanting from Hot Topic. It’s, like, twenty bucks, which probably isn’t a lot in the grand scheme of things, but I’ve been holding off ‘cause it’s just one t-shirt. Like, I could spend twenty dollars on something else.”
“Yeah. I get that. Wanna invite Rachel? I know she’s not busy today, since it’s Sunday. She loves shopping, especially if it involves getting me or you a ‘self care gift’, as she calls it. Last time she got me a candle.”
Nico laughed. “Of course. Rachel’s always fun to be around. I would like to see what self care gift she’d pick out for me.”
Will grinned. “It could range from an actual self care item to boba, sweatpants, or a Starbucks cake pop.”
“Awesome. Count me in.”
⋆⁺₊⋆ ☀︎ ⋆⁺₊⋆
Will and Nico met up with Rachel, and they ended up at the mall.
Will’s trying not to be insecure, but he can’t help it when Rachel’s got her cool boho style and Nico’s all alternative. He’s got no real clothing style, he just kinda wears whatever he finds on the floor of his bedroom, which is mostly hoodies and graphic tees with jeans or shorts. He thinks he’s a little boring. He knows Nico and Rachel would disagree, so he’s just not going to tell them he feels like that.
“Where first?” Rachel asked, wearing a green maxi skirt and a white cropped tank top. She’s wearing lots of crystals today. It all compliments her curly red hair perfectly.
“Will, where do you wanna go first?” Nico asked. He’s looking very cute in one of Will’s flannels paired with a t-shirt and black baggy ripped jeans. He's still wearing the amethyst bracelet he’d given him earlier.
“Uhm, I don’t know, let’s go to your favorite store, Rachel.” Will said, holding Nico’s hand.
“The crystal store? Why do you wanna go there?” Rachel asked.
“Nico wants to see it.” Will glanced at the amethyst bracelet Nico wore.
“Ah, alright. Follow me.”
They walked into the store, Nico grinning at all the pretty shiny things.
Nico took Rachel’s hand and led her over to a stand of pitch black crystals. Will smiled and followed.
“That’s black tourmaline. It mainly helps protect you from negative energy.” Rachel explained as Nico looked at the table.
He picked up a bracelet, similar to the amethyst one, and tried it on. It fit nicely.
“So, does it also help with negative thoughts?” Nico asked.
Rachel smiled. “Yeah. Thoughts and energies. I’m guessing you want that one?”
Nico stared at the black bead bracelet on his wrist. “Yeah. I think I’ll try it out. It also matches my style, not that that’s the point, but..”
“That’ll be your self care item from me to you.” Rachel said, crossing her arms with a grin.
Will laughed. “I fuckin’ knew it. Rachel, I love you.”
Rachel closed her eyes and hugged Will from the side. “So I’m predictable now?”
“Yes. And I know you’re gonna go over to the pins and stickers next.”
“You know me so well, William.”
Will watched as Rachel rummaged through the little basket of $1 stickers.
“ Will! Your flag.” Rachel said, handing him a heart-shaped sticker with a black triangle on the side and a purple line across the middle.
“Rach..I’m gonna be honest I didn’t really know what the flag even looked like.”
“Well now you know. The Demi-romantic flag is similar, but with a green line instead of purple. See, I’m teaching you things even when we’re not at work.”
“Hey. Whatcha guys doing?” Nico asked, walking up to the two of them after wandering the store.
“Stickers. Look, my flag. One of them.” Will said, showing Nico the Demi-ace sticker.
Nico smiled. “Awesome.”
Rachel gasped quietly and laughed, holding a sticker to her chest.
“What? What is it?” Will asked, trying to grab it from Rachel.
“Literally you.” Rachel said, handing the sticker to Will.
Will stared at the sticker. A capybara with a cowboy hat. How is this him?
“Rachel. What does this mean?” Will asked with a laugh. Nico smirked.
“Capybaras are cute. They’re therapy animals for some people. I don’t know, they remind me of you. And then the cowboy hat? Sold. ” Rachel said.
Will felt warm. Like, a warm loving-type feeling. He feels like he’s found his people. He smiled.
˚₊ ⋆ ☠︎︎ ⋆ ₊˚
Nico thanked Rachel for the new bracelet, admiring it on his wrist. Will happily looked at his two new stickers.
“I think I’m gonna get us some food. Is sushi fine?” Rachel asked.
“Yeah, that’s fine.” Will replied. Nico nodded.
“‘Kay. Cool, I’ll meet you guys in a bit.”
˚₊ ⋆ ☠︎︎ ⋆ ₊˚
Nico and Will decided to roam around a random clothing store.
When they walked in, a woman came up to them. She acted a bit strange, pushing her chest up and batting her eyelashes at Will as she spoke. “Hello. Is there anything you need help with?”
“No. We’re good.” A feeling of anger rose inside Nico. He squeezed Will’s hand, pulling him away from the woman.
They looked at jeans, Will looking for Nico’s size.
“Hey, what about these?” Will asked, holding up the pair of black cargo jeans.
Nico was frowning, or pouting, whatever. “They’re cool.” He said flatly.
Will’s face softened. “Angel, is it that girl?”
Nico sighed. “She was trying to seduce you. Pushing her chest up and shit. We were holding hands. It should’ve been obvious.”
Will pulled Nico into a hug. “You know I only have eyes for you, right? You’re the only one I want.” He said with his adorable Southern drawl.
“Amore..I know. I’m not mad at you. You didn’t do anything wrong. I’m mad at that girl.”
Nico then clinged onto Will like a koala. “Mine.” He murmured.
Will laughed and smiled. “Exactly.”
˚₊ ⋆ ☠︎︎ ⋆ ₊˚
Nico walked into Hot Topic, having that specific t-shirt in mind. He hopes that they have it.
He walked up to the band tee wall and glanced at all of the displayed shirts. He knows not every shirt they have is on the wall, but he sees the one he’s looking for.
It’s an MCR shirt that he’s been eyeing for months . He looks through the shelf, finding it in his size.
Will came up to him, smiling. “That’s the shirt?”
Nico nodded. “Yes.”
Rachel came up to them with Sanrio socks in her hand. She smiled when she saw Nico was happy.
“I’m ready now. I just wanted the shirt.” Nico said.
“‘Kay. I’ll pay for it.” Will replied.
Nico grinned. “You’re joking. No, you don’t need to buy me it.”
“Call it a gift for being the best boyfriend ever.”
Rachel smiled at them.
Notes:
they’re so so cute i will not stop saying this
im doing…okay i guess. i’m kinda falling into some slight eating disorder habits (thoughts and some actual actions) idk what to do abt that. other than that im doing okay, kinda just letting things pass with time. moving is exciting but also exhausting, there’s some plumbing that needs to be done before we can actually move in so we’re waiting on that!
i’ve been reading a lot to distract myself. both regular books and fanfic. it’s honestly my favorite way to wind down and escape for a bit lol, also drawing and playing the sims.
i’m excited for youth group tonight, so that’s a plus!! :)) anyways, i hope you enjoyed this chapter, see you hopefully soon for the next one!! 💗
Chapter 11: dinner party
Summary:
“You two are sharing? How cute.” Jason said, nudging Nico’s shoulder.
Nico scoffed. “Shut up. I’m not hungry enough to eat a whole thing myself.”
Well, that was half-true.
Notes:
hey!!
warning for disordered eating and mention of death/grief
enjoyyyyy :)
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
Will stared at the flickering flames of the candle lit on their dresser. He sat criss-crossed on the bed.
There was a Ramones record playing in the background, Nico had picked it out.
Nico had his back turned, taking his shirt off. His angel wings tattoo and spine became visible.
Nico then slipped a loose tank top on, turning around to get on the bed.
“Hey.” Nico said, crawling up next to Will.
“Hey.” Will whispered.
Nico plopped down in Will’s lap, leaning on his chest.
He hummed, then grabbed Will’s hand to squeeze it.
Will guesses that a hand squeeze means something along the lines of ‘I want comfort and I love you.’ Will’s not fully sure that’s the meaning, he can’t always read Nico, but that’s his best guess.
“Will…today is…Bianca and Maria’s death anniversary.” Nico said with a shaky breath.
Will breathed slowly, helping Nico calm down. He squeezed Nico’s hand tight.
“I’m so sorry, Nico. You’ve been a bit quiet today, I didn’t know what the situation was. I didn’t wanna overstep. Is there anything you’d like me to do to help you feel more comforted today?” Will asked.
“Uhm..I don’t know. I just want to hug you. I miss them so, so, much. After their deaths…that’s when I started doing that unhealthy stuff. It was my only way to cope at the time.”
Will nodded. “Is that why you tried to find people who loved you?”
Nico let out a breath. “Yeah. It was so fucking stupid of me. I would sneak into parties and bars and have some drinks and then..some man would find me all vulnerable. I don’t drink anymore. I never liked the taste, anyways. It was just so I could have some control. That’s what part of my eating disorder is like too.”
“That makes sense. I want to be able to support you in any way possible.”
Nico nodded, turning around to sit in Will’s lap and face him. “You have been so, so, so good to me. You have been the light in my life lately. When everything feels like it’s crashing down, you’re always there for me. Your support has helped me a lot already. Know this.”
Will’s heart fluttered in his chest. He smiled softly. “I…Nico…nobody’s ever said anything like that to me before. I appreciate it so much.”
“Of course. You’re my person. I care about you so much.” Nico said so quietly it muffled into
Will’s chest.
⋆⁺₊⋆ ☀︎ ⋆⁺₊⋆
march
Will and Nico got invited to a dinner party. Will could tell that Nico was nervous about it.
Will held Nico’s hand in the taxi. “Are you doing okay?” He asked.
Nico squeezed Will’s fingers. He nodded.
“Alright. Just making sure. If you want to leave whenever, please let me know.” Will said with a gentle smile.
⋆⁺₊⋆ ☀︎ ⋆⁺₊⋆
They sat next to each other at the large table. Percy and Annabeth were here, they were the ones who had hosted this dinner. Piper sat across from Nico, laughing with Annabeth. Jason wasn’t here yet, though.
“What do you want to get?” Will whispered to Nico.
“Uhm…maybe a salad? Like, the one with chicken, so it has some protein.” Nico mumbled so only Will could hear.
Will tapped Nico’s thigh under the table. “Okay. Wanna try something with me? Like, what about the steak? Ribs?”
Nico swallowed hard. “I want to. So bad, but my brain tells me I can’t.”
Will rubbed small circles on Nico’s thigh under the table with his finger. “What if I eat half. Or most. Or, you could just get the salad.”
“I want to share steak with you, I think. Maybe some mashed potatoes with it?”
Will nodded with a smile. “Sure, yeah. Remember that you don’t have to eat all of it, okay?”
Nico nodded.
˚₊ ⋆ ☠︎︎ ⋆ ₊˚
Nico was glad this was a laid-back dinner. He didn’t know what to do if someone noticed he wasn’t eating much. He really doesn’t want Percy to know.
Jason eventually arrived and sat next to Nico. If Jason found out, Nico guesses it wouldn’t be the end of the world. He trusted him.
They all ordered, Nico still got a salad, but just a small one with no meat.
“You two are sharing? How cute.” Jason said, nudging Nico’s shoulder.
Nico scoffed. “Shut up. I’m not hungry enough to eat a whole thing myself.”
Well, that was half-true.
Nico fidgeted with the crystal bracelets he was wearing. The ones from Rachel. He tried charging them, as Rachel told him to. He doesn’t know if he did it right, but he’s sleeping a bit better, so he guesses it’s working.
He wore a leather jacket with some pins on it. One was just a gay flag pin, and two more that had the words “ Fuck Terfs ” and “ Take No Shit. ”
He’d say he’s got a good pin collection. People at Macy’s would disagree. Doesn’t matter though, he doesn’t work there anymore. He’s still trying to find a job, so that he and Will aren’t living off of just Starbucks money and his occasional painting that sells online. He’ll find one, he’s just being picky.
˚₊ ⋆ ☠︎︎ ⋆ ₊˚
Eventually, their food arrived. Nico stared at the steak in front of him and Will. It looked yummy, especially the mashed potatoes with gravy. He took a sip of his water, purposely stalling taking a bite.
Will nudged him with his foot. “We can take a bite together.” He whispered.
Nico nodded. stabbing a cut up piece with his fork. He then shoved it in his mouth and started chewing, and so did his boyfriend.
“Is it good?” Will asked quietly.
“Yeah. I’ll have some more.”
They ate most of the plate, Nico mainly eating the mashed potatoes. He did have, like, 5 pieces of steak. He’d say that’s a lot, at least for him. And then he had his salad. So he’s proud of himself. Will seems proud of him too.
“Hey, wanna take a break?” Will asked, basically whispering into Nico’s ear.
“Yeah, sure. I kinda want one anyway.” Nico whispered back.
They slowly got up, leaving the table. Annabeth and Jason glanced at them as they left.
Nico led Will to the hallway with the restrooms. There was some random early 2010’s pop song playing in the background, people talking and silverware clattering. The noses were all kind of overwhelming when happening all at once.
Nico stood there against the wall, opening his mouth to say something but staying silent.
“Hm? What is it?” Will asked softly.
“I…I dunno..”
Will huffed and gently grabbed Nico’s hand, giving him a knowing look.
“Sorry. It’s just…I feel good about what I ate tonight, but there’s that—that thing lingering in the back of my mind that’s like, ‘ You shouldn’t have done that .’ It’s like a feeling of guilt.”
Will nodded, lifting Nico’s hand up and kissing it softly. “I get what you mean. I think you should be proud. Take that good feeling and make it stronger than that bad one. Y’know?”
Nico nodded. “Yeah. I do. I’ll try my best to do that.
Notes:
tw for mentions of disordered eating below (relating to me and not the fic!!)
ughhhh i am being so unhealthy with myself lately, i feel like this entire week ive barely eaten anything actually filling with protein to give me energy and fuel for the day. every time i eat i feel so guilty :( esp if it’s something like a sweet or something closer to an actual meal. obviously that’s not normal and healthy thinking, and i realize this but for some reason my mind can’t comprehend it? i don’t know.
i ate a meal today and although i can feel my body getting sick from it, i still ate it!! im going to have a little self care night i think, like a bath and a face mask and lol idk, whatever ppl do to feel better.
also i saw nico’s pins on etsy (that’s how i got the idea) and i lowkey want them for myself LMAOOO
thank you to everyone whose been commenting and leaving kudos i appreciate it so so much and you guys are so kind to me it makes me wanna cry (in a good way 💗)
thank you for reading this chapter, have a good day/night!! <33
Chapter 12: warmth
Summary:
“Who’s your fave?” Will asked after a bit.
“From Spongebob? I dunno. They’re all pretty fun and silly. I’m gonna have to say Patrick.” Nico replied.
“Mine’s Spongebob.” Will whispered into Nico’s neck. Nico smiled.
“What about Sandy? She’s Texan.”
Will laughed. “True. I like all of them. Also what is a squirrel from Texas doing in the ocean?”
Notes:
hello
i don’t think there’s any warnings for this chap, but if there is something you think should be tagged lmk!
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
flashback: november
Nico threw himself onto his bed. He let out a grunt, pulling a pillow to his face. He wanted to scream into it, but his roommates would hear.
Nico was contemplating his options. He needs to let out his anger and stress somehow.
He got up, grabbed some pajamas and locked himself in the bathroom. He started the water, just wanting to feel some warmth.
Once the water was almost boiling hot, he stripped and quickly got in the shower. He doesn’t want to see his body.
He put a glob of shampoo in his palm and started scrubbing his hair as best as he could. He was never that good at washing his hair, but he tries his best.
He quickly finished up his shower, stepping out into the chilly bathroom air. He grabbed a towel and wrapped himself in it.
Nico yawned as he left the bathroom, wearing Halloween pajama pants and an oversized hoodie.
“Did you take up all the hot water?” Percy asked from the kitchen.
“Maybe. You showered earlier, why do you care?” Nico mumbled, joining Percy in the kitchen.
Nico opened the fridge, grabbing a sugar-free Redbull.
Percy’s eyebrows raised. “Woah. What’s with you?”
“What do you mean?” Nico asked, opening the can and taking a big sip.
“You’re being all…defensive.” Percy said, leaning on the counter near the toaster.
“Percy, I’m not gonna sit here and pretend I didn’t hear you talking with Jason yesterday about how you don’t trust Will.”
“ What? It’s not that I don’t trust him, I just feel like, y’know, you need to know more about him first. What does he do for work? Does he go to school? How old is he?”
Nico glared as he took an angry sip of his Redbull. “Fucking hell . He works at the Starbucks by the library. He’s going to Med School. He’s 20, like me. What is your Goddamn problem?”
Percy put his hands up in surrender, clearly trying to calm Nico down. “Sorry. I just..I want to make sure you’re safe.”
“I’m safe with Will. What we do is none of your business. Leave me alone .”
Nico stormed off into his bedroom, shutting the door louder than he meant to. He set the Redbull on the nightstand and sighed as he stared at his messy room.
The only clean parts were his bed and Crystal’s spot near the window. All his plants were clearly dying and his clothes and art supplies littered the floor.
Nico downed the rest of his drink and started picking up the dirty clothes and putting them in the laundry bin.
At some point, there was a soft knock on the door. Nico barely heard it as he blasted music in his headphones.
Jason slowly opened the door, coming into view. Nico saw him and paused the music, taking off his headphones.
“What is it?” Nico asked, now standing in a clear spot on his once messy floor.
“I was just checking in on you,” Jason said, pushing his glasses closer to his face.
“Uh…is it what went down in the kitchen earlier?” Nico asked, crossing his arms.
Jason swallowed hard, then replied. “Yeah, I mean, kinda. I know you two aren’t getting along that great sometimes…but I worry about how you’re feeling. With, y’know, how you were when we met.”
Nico clenched his jaw, walking over and sitting on his bed. He motioned for Jason to join him.
Jason sat down next to Nico. He was wearing sweatpants and a hoodie with his high school football team on it.
Nico took a deep breath and let it out. “I guess..I just..Percy is complicated. He doesn’t get it.”
Jason hugged his knees. “What doesn’t he get?”
“He just…I dunno. He acts like every man I hang out with is gonna hurt me, or use me, or whatever. Will’s not like that. He’s nice, and sweet, and..”
Jason smiled. “You like him then, don’t you?”
Nico’s face went warm. “ Huh?? We’re just friends, Jason. Maybe I do like him. It doesn’t matter..”
Jason nudged Nico’s shoulder. “I know. I’m rooting for you. He’s a great guy.”
Nico looked down and smiled knowingly. Little does Jason Grace know that he and Will are already a couple.
⋆⁺₊⋆ ☀︎ ⋆⁺₊⋆
present day: march
Will awoke to Nico and Crystal’s soft snoring. He didn’t wanna wake them, but he glanced outside.
It was thundering outside, rain pouring down. Lovely.
“Hey, Nico?” Will whispered, gently tapping Nico’s shoulder.
“Mmm?” He stirred, his eyes fluttering open.
“It’s storming. The thunder…kinda freaks me out.”
Nico reached out his arms and cupped Will’s face in his hands. “We could watch a show? What’s your current comfort show?”
Will smiled. “Spongebob.”
Nico laughed, pulling his hands away. “Okay. What episode do you wanna start on?”
“That midnight shift one. Or wait—maybe the camping one?”
Nico smiled, shaking his head. “I’ll just get a random one started for us. I don’t know how you remember them. I only remember that one with the realistic gorilla and butterfly, because it was probably the start of my childhood trauma.”
Will laughed, covering his face with his hoodie sleeve. “Definitely. I had my mom turn that one off every time they appeared.”
Nico slowly nodded with a smile, getting out from under the covers.
˚₊ ⋆ ☠︎︎ ⋆ ₊˚
Nico sprawled out on the couch, still leaving room for Will. A boom of thunder was followed by a flash of lightning.
Nico turned on Spongebob. He didn’t recognize the episode, but he knows Will probably did.
Will smiled, leaning his head on Nico’s shoulder.
Nico took a deep breath, letting it out. He felt calm despite the weather outside. Maybe the weather actually made things more cozy and calming in a way.
“Who’s your fave?” Will asked after a bit.
“From Spongebob? I dunno. They’re all pretty fun and silly. I’m gonna have to say Patrick.” Nico replied.
“Mine’s Spongebob.” Will whispered into Nico’s neck. Nico smiled.
“What about Sandy? She’s Texan.”
Will laughed. “True. I like all of them. Also what is a squirrel from Texas doing in the ocean?”
Nico laughed. “You’re the one asking me, Love. You’re the bigger cartoon watcher here.”
˚₊ ⋆ ☠︎︎ ⋆ ₊˚
It was well into the night now, and it was still storming.
A bit ago Will had to leave for a special medical class. He said it was a gross but important one, where you learn more about surgery—“with hands-on learning activities”—he had said. Nico smiled at the fact that Will made it sound like a preschool science experiment and not cutting open real organs. Nico shuddered at that thought.
Nico, in all honesty, was longing. Longing for his lover’s warmth and smile and comfort and touch. Was he probably a bit horny? Yeah. But he respects Will’s boundaries, so he’s not going to do anything.
Nico hummed, reaching for his phone. He opened up YouTube, looking for something to watch.
He started watching a random vlog. He then got a text from Will.
Will 💗💗
10:39pm
Hey Angel, I’m done with the class. I’m omw back now 🫶
Nico smiled.
yayyy okay!! see u soon i hope!!
❤️
Nico could almost feel Will’s smile as he walked back home.
˚₊ ⋆ ☠︎︎ ⋆ ₊˚
Will eventually arrived back home and Nico pulled him into a gentle embrace.
“Hey. I got you a Redbull.” Will said, handing Nico the sugar-free Redbull can.
Nico grinned. “How’d you know?” He asked.
Will laughed. “I was drinkin’ one at school and I thought you’d want one too. I see you drink these sometimes.” He answered, his accent strong.
“Thank you. Also how’d the class go? Was it like Dr. Pimple Popper?”
Will laughed again, and God he was so beautiful and bright . Nico almost melted.
“Uhm, no…well, the cutting open things was. Other than that it was pretty gruesome. I learned stuff though.”
Nico smiled softly. “That’s great, Amore. Also…I, uh, wanted to do something with you.”
Will’s expression was gentle, but he was obviously curious. “What is it?” He asked, taking Nico’s hand and holding it close to his heart.
“Uhm…I’m just longing for your touch and comfort. I didn’t think farther than that, I didn’t want to…”
Will softly kissed Nico’s hand, looking at him. “Hey, it’s alright. Tell me what you want.” He said, his accent still strong.
“I want your touch.” Nico whispered.
Will smiled. “How would you like it?”
“However you want. I don’t want you to be uncomfortable.”
“I think I need to know how you want it, though, Angel.”
“Okay. I want you to gently touch and kiss me wherever. Any place you're comfortable with.”
“Alright. Here let’s go to our room,” Will said, taking off his backpack and setting it down by the couch.
⋆⁺₊⋆ ☀︎ ⋆⁺₊⋆
Will started rummaging through his drawers for some pajamas. He eventually put on a pair of green sleep shorts. He kept his faded graphic tee on.
He felt Nico’s glance behind him. He didn’t care, it actually made him pretty happy. It felt good to have someone who loves you for who you are, and how you are.
Will turned around and sat on the bed next to his boyfriend. Nico looked happy, staring at Will’s whole being, just taking in his existence.
Will gently reached over and rubbed Nico’s leg. Bringing him back to reality.
“Hey, Darlin’,” Will whispered.
Nico smiled. “Yeah?”
“Where do you wanna start?”
Nico took a deep breath. Then he let it out. “Here, can I take off my shirt?”
Will nodded. “Yeah.”
Nico slipped out of his t-shirt. He had gained some weight, which made Will happy. It was only a little, but it still counted.
“Where? Guide me.” Will whispered, reaching his hand out.
Nico took it, guiding Will’s hand to rest on his chest.
Will nodded, laying his warm palm flat on Nico’s chest. It rose up and down slowly as Nico breathed.
Will gently rubbed circles and stars on the bare skin. Nico’s whole body relaxed into the touch.
“Here, let’s lay down. It's comfier.” Will murmured, guiding him and Nico down onto the pillow.
“Thanks.” Nico whispered with a smile.
Will smiled back, tracing circles and stars all over Nico’s upper body.
“Would you want to take off your shirt?” Nico asked after a moment.
“Sure,” Will replied, taking off his shirt. Nico smiled and reached out to trace the sun tattoo Will had.
“Do you like it?” Will whispered.
“Yeah. Of course, I already let you know once before. I love it.” Nico murmured, inches from Will’s face. His lips.
Nico’s touch felt nice. His hands were slightly cool to the touch, contrasting Will’s own warmth perfectly.
“You’re so pretty, Will. Everything…everything about you is. You are not allowed to say otherwise.” Nico said, holding Will’s face in his hands.
Will laughed gently. “Thank you.”
Nico eventually snuggled up against Will, bathing in his warmth. “You’re warm.” He had said.
Will smiled, closing his eyes.
Notes:
i just want what they have tbh 😭😭
everything in my life has been pretty much the same, still waiting on that plumbing for the house, and i’m struggling with eating a little but not to the point where it’s severe.
yesterday i went to the doctor for testosterone and they said they’ll get me in with their person there to write my letter. idk how long the wait will be, but either way im excited about that, so that’s something good!! :)))
i think despite the plumbing we’re officially moving soon, because our apartment building is getting on our last nerve LMAOO i seriously cannot wait to move into the new place. :)))
thank you for reading this chapter, i hope you have a good day/night!! 💗💗
Chapter 13: opening up
Summary:
“Sorry. I know I shouldn’t bring myself down to lift you up. Mental note, ‘stop doing that.’”
“You really just said ‘mental note’ out loud.”
“Shut up!!” Nico laughed, throwing Will’s shirt from last night at him.
Notes:
hi
warnings for mention of eating disorders and self harm
enjoyyyy
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
Will awoke to the sun shining through their flowy curtains. He turned his head over, seeing Nico half-asleep next to him.
Will turned to face the ceiling, the sunshine making the room brighter.
“Will…” Nico mumbled.
“Hm?” Will hummed, glancing back at Nico.
“Morning.”
Will smiled. “Good morning.”
Nico fully opened his dark eyes, staring at Will.
“Last night was nice.” Nico said, flopping himself over onto Will.
“Yeah. And it’s sunny today.”
“Mhm.” Nico hummed, rolling over and getting out of bed.
“Oh? You’re the first out of bed today?” Will asked, grinning.
Nico laughed, looking for a shirt. “Yup. Can’t beat me today, William. I have energy for once.”
Will sat up. “Hey, that’s good! Me too. I think it’s the sun.”
“Probably.” Nico replied, finding a shirt and putting it on.
Nico turned and faced Will again. “What?” Nico asked. Will was staring at him with a smile.
“Basking in your presence.” He answered.
Nico laughed. “Since when were you a poet?”
“I dunno. I just like letting you know that you’re awesome.”
Nico shook his head with a smile. “I’m not. That’s all you.”
“Nico…”
“Sorry. I know I shouldn’t bring myself down to lift you up. Mental note, ‘ stop doing that.’”
“You really just said ‘mental note’ out loud.”
“Shut up!!” Nico laughed, throwing Will’s shirt from last night at him.
˚₊ ⋆ ☠︎︎ ⋆ ₊˚
Nico leaned on the counter, waiting for his breakfast sandwich to warm up in the microwave.
He rarely uses Instagram, or any social media. Instagram is all he has, and he’s never on there except to like Will’s new posts.
He opened the app, seeing all the notifications of Will tagging him in his posts with him. They were all super cute, and Will’s account is private, so no strangers—none of those men, nor his dad—could ever see it. That made him feel better.
He scrolled and saw Will’s newest post. It was from last night, at his class.
[The image was of Will, in full scrubs, a hair cap, and goggles, smiling and doing a thumbs up with both his hands while wearing a face mask and sterile gloves.]
(caption) williamasolace: Med school update!! Learning how to be a surgeon LOLL
kaylathecat45: OMG!! Will I’m so proud of u 💓
austinlakemusic: holy shit!! big hugs coming when we meet again!!
Nico clicked on the rest of the comments. He read through them all, grinning.
racheldarecreates: WILLS IM GONNA CRY it’s been a long time comingggggg 🩷😉😙
pipermclean: WOAHHH AHHH ik you’ve been wanting this for so long!! lots of love 💕
annabethchased: Will! I’m so proud, this is a huge step towards becoming a doctor!! Keep going it’ll be worth it <33
Nico read all of them, smiling. He clicked on one of Will’s older posts from a while ago. In the image he was holding an R2-D2 toy figure and smiling.
(caption) williamasolace: May the Fourth be with youuuuu
Nico laughed. It was unexplainable how much he loved this man. His boyfriend. He still cannot believe that’s real, even though it’s been his reality for months now. And now Will’s doing well in Med School, and he’s got a great group of people supporting him. It makes Nico happy to see Will happy.
Although, as Will’s boyfriend, Nico knows more about him than others might. He sees both Will’s ups and downs. His highs and lows.
“I was…I’m fuckin’…” Will sobbed into Nico’s chest one night a few weeks ago. It made Nico’s heart completely break.
“Amore, breathe .” Nico murmured, rubbing small circles on Will’s back.
“I..I..I was doing so well.”
Nico whispered small compliments into Will’s ear, rocking the two of them back and forth. “You’re going to be okay. This feeling will pass.”
Will sniffed. “We need to throw away the sharp stuff in the bathroom.” He whispered.
Nico held Will tight in his arms. “I don’t like stubble, and neither do you. We just need to get better, better at coping.”
Will sniffed again and nodded. “Yeah. We’re in this together.”
Nico smiled softly at Will, still holding him close. “Yeah. Also…I want you to know that this is a sign you’re trying. Trying to get better, and to be clean. Losing a bit of progress isn’t the end of the world, Love. You’re strong and you’re trying. That’s all that matters right now.”
Will nodded, hugging Nico tight.
⋆⁺₊⋆ ☀︎ ⋆⁺₊⋆
Will layed on the bed, staring up at the ceiling. Their galaxy projector made colorful lights and stars dance around. Will decided to focus on it.
Eventually Nico came out of the bathroom and sat on the bed next to Will.
“Hm?” Will hummed, lost in thought.
“Hey.” Nico whispered.
Will rolled over to face Nico. “Hey. Can we…do something like last night again?”
Nico smiled softly. “If you want to. What would you like us to do?”
Will wanted Nico to touch him. Kind of like how he touched Nico. He’s bad at putting what he wants into words, but he wants Nico’s affection.
“Can you touch me?” Will asked quietly.
“Where?”
Will got out from under the covers and gently moved Nico’s hand to his bare thigh. He was just wearing his boxers.
Nico nodded in response. He softly traced his fingers on Will’s thigh.
“The—the stretch marks..” Will mumbled with a frown.
Nico paused, looking up at Will. “Amore..they’re gorgeous. There’s nothing wrong with them. Almost everyone has some. Embrace them,” He said with a smile.
Will softly touched Nico’s hand which was on his thigh.
“Look at me.” Nico whispered softly.
Will glanced up at Nico, staring deeply into his big brown eyes. Doe eyes, Will had called them.
“You’re perfect the way you are, Will. I love you. The marks are pretty, they show your growth.”
“I know but..” Will mumbled.
“But what?”
“I don’t know.”
Nico hummed in response, grabbing onto Will’s index finger.
“What do you need from me right now?” Nico asked gently, swaying Will’s finger in shapes that seem like either an infinity sign or the Disney Channel wand motion.
Will smiled, but Nico knew he wasn’t fully happy.
“It’s less of a need, and more of a want. ” Will said, sniffing.
“What do you want?” Nico asked just above a whisper.
Will shook his head quickly. “I don’t know. I just…want…a hug.”
Nico reached his arms out, and Will fell into them. He started crying, soaking Nico’s soft t-shirt.
Nico murmured sweet words into Will’s ear, holding him close.
⋆⁺₊⋆ ☀︎ ⋆⁺₊⋆
Will and Nico just got back to their apartment from grocery shopping. Will loved Nico’s outfit, as he always does.
After they had put the groceries away, they went into their room. Nico slipped off his angel hoodie.
Will feels like he’s been so touched-starved lately. He’s a little confused about that, considering him and Nico cuddle and hug almost daily. Whatever though, Will knows he can always ask his boyfriend for affection.
“Hey, Nico? Will asked quietly.
Nico turned around to face him, shirtless. “Hmm?” He hummed in response.
“Can we make out?”
Nico smiled. “Sure. How would you like it?”
Will leaned on the wall. “Here? Against the wall?”
Nico nodded, walking over and smashing their lips together, basically pinning him to the wall.
Nico pulled away, panting. “More?” He asked breathlessly.
Will quickly nodded, grabbing Nico’s waist. He grabbed Nico’s belt loop and pulled Nico closer to him.
Nico laughed, kissing Will again. Nico lifted his hands and grabbed Will’s fluffy curls, running his hands through them.
Will bit Nico’s lower lip gently, and Nico grunted.
Nico started gently kissing and sucking on Will’s jaw and neck. That will probably leave bruises later, but Will doesn’t care.
They both pulled away, gasping for air. “I love you so so much.” Will whispered with a smile.
Nico laughed breathlessly, smiling back. “I know.” He whispered in response.
˚₊ ⋆ ☠︎︎ ⋆ ₊˚
After their moment, Nico decided to post a picture from a bit ago of Will.
[Image: Will wearing sunglasses and a t-shirt while holding a scone. The sun was shining bright and Will was on a park bench.]
( Caption) theghostking: william at the park
jasongrace34: Omg his hair is literally golden.
pipermclean: the perfect man for u nico
racheldarecreates: HAHA i love it!! 🥰 💕
racheldarecreates: UR SO GOLDENNN 🎶
Nico grinned, glancing over at Will, who was laying next to him.
After a moment Will smirked. “Not this photo!! I know you like it ‘cause it’s like that one you saw on MatchMe.”
Nico blushed, quickly hiding his face under the covers. “Stop!! You didn’t have to say it out loud.”
Will laughed lightly. “I know. You’re just so cute when you’re flustered.”
˚₊ ⋆ ☠︎︎ ⋆ ₊˚
Nico decided he needed to tell Rachel about his eating.
He’s currently sitting with Will and Rachel in their living room. He needs to chat with them.
“So, Nico, what did you wanna chat about?” Rachel asked, gently placing her hand on Will’s shoulder as they both looked at Nico.
“Uhm…I’ve been hiding something from you, Rachel. It’s time I tell you.” He said quietly.
Rachel gave Nico a soft look.
“I have a, uh,” Nico shivered, “an eating disorder.”
Rachel glanced at Will, then back at Nico. “Nico..how long have you been dealing with this?” She asked.
Nico stared at Will’s hands, which were fidgeting with his bracelets. “A few years.”
Rachel took a deep breath and let it out. “What are some things you particularly struggle with? Only if you want to share.”
Nico sniffled. “Finishing meals. Or, having the courage to eat them in the first place. Lots of foods scare me. Gaining weight scares me.”
Will took a shaky breath at that. He gave Nico a gentle look.
“Okay. How can we help you? Will and I.” Rachel asked.
Nico looked up at Rachel. She was dead serious.
“I…I don’t know. Supporting me, I guess. I just want support. I want to get better, I just don’t know how.”
Rachel nodded. “We can certainly do that. If you ever, and I mean ever need anything , you can always text or call me. And you have Will, and I’m guessing you already talk to him a bit about this?”
Nico nodded. “A little, he knows more than anyone. He knows more than my therapist.”
Will reached out for Nico’s hand. He took it.
“I didn’t know that.” Will whispered to Nico and Rachel.
“It’s the truth.” Nico whispered.
Will nodded, and suddenly a bit of weight lifted off of Nico’s chest.
Notes:
hey everyone! sorry it’s been a while since i posted, it took me forever to finish this chap cause ive been depressed and busy and unmotivated lol..
more fluff and intimacy to come in the next chapter, i can’t help but write will & nico to be the softest & sappiest bfs ever. they are sooo in love (i want what they have 😭😭)
as for life stuff, idk really. i’ve been really unmotivated and just like, sad recently? we spent the night at our new house for the first time. i loved it. the amount of sunlight in my new room in the morning and evening is so nice. the only thing tho was i slept on an air mattress so my back and neck hurt in the morning 😭 im sure once my actual bed is there it will be even better.
thank you for reading this chapter, i hope you enjoyed it :) i appreciate all kudos and comments, and have a good day/night!! 💗💗
(don’t mind the slight formatting change, idk what’s going on with my copy and paste on ao3 but haha i hope it’s not annoyingly different!!)
Chapter 14: touch
Summary:
“Where can I touch you?” Nico whispered into Will’s ear.
Will swallowed hard. “Wherever. I just…no finger insertion.”
Nico laughed softly at that, then nodded. “That’s a fancy way of saying that. I shall respect your wishes.”
Notes:
hi
i don’t think there’s any warnings, but lmk if something should be tagged up here
enjoy 💗
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
Will slumped back deeper into the mountain of pillows he was laying on. He didn’t feel well, mainly mentally.
Depression is strange. Sometimes you’re feeling great. Some days are just, okay. Some days are awful, and some days are a mix of everything.
Will, at the moment, felt pretty bad. If you asked him why, he doesn’t really have a good answer to give. He just woke up like this.
Nico walked into the bedroom, pausing as he stared at Will’s pillow mountain.
“Will,” Nico said quietly, walking up next to his boyfriend.
“I don’t know.” He replied with a crooked smile.
Nico sat down next to Will on the bed. “Hey, need anything from me right now?”
“...Comfort.” Will mumbled, turning his head to face Nico.
Nico smiled softly. “Like what kind?”
“The kind where you wash my hair in the bath, run your gentle fingers through my wet hair, and whisper sweet things into my ear.”
Nico laughed. “ Very specific. I’ll get that bath going for you, Amore.”
⋆⁺₊⋆ ☀︎ ⋆⁺₊⋆
Nico eventually came back from the bathroom, standing over Will who was laying on his back.
Nico smiled softly, his long dark hair falling to his face.
“Bath time, my love.” He whispered, guiding Will out of bed and into the bathroom.
Will could barely register that he was now in the bathroom. He blinked, staring at his boyfriend.
“Sorry. Kinda out of it right now.” Will whispered, taking his shirt off.
Nico’s expression was neutral. “Will..” He murmured.
Will hummed in response, now in just his underwear.
“I dunno. Here, I’ll wash your hair.”
Will fully stripped and got in the tub. He stared at the faucet, not saying anything.
“What are you thinking?” Nico asked while pouring a cup of water onto Will’s hair.
“Is that what you were gonna say a moment ago?” Will whispered back.
Nico smiled. “Yeah. Like, your brain is fogged?”
“Mhm.” Will hummed, cherishing the feeling of Nico touching his hair.
Nico laughed gently. “You like that, don’t you?”
“Yes. It feels nice.”
Nico gently combed the conditioner through Will’s loose curls. Then he rinsed it out.
“No..” Will barely spoke.
Nico grinned. “Amore, I can touch your hair as long as you’d like.”
Will laughed. “I’d love that, but..”
“Hm?”
“Would you wanna get in too?”
Nico combed his fingers through Will’s wet hair. “You want me to?”
“Yeah.”
“Okay. That means I gotta pull away.”
“That’s fine.”
Nico pulled away, dried his hands and stripped to just his boxers. They had stars, moons, and suns on them.
“C’mere.” Will whispered in the bath.
“Will, I’m not even naked yet.”
“I know.”
Nico walked over to the edge of the bathtub. Will hugged Nico’s hips.
“Don’t you want me to be in the bath?” Nico asked with a laugh.
“Yes, but I’m inpatient. You know this.”
Nico shook his head with a smile and took his boxers off, stepping into and sitting in the bathtub.
They stared at each other for a moment, a gentle smile on both their faces.
Will reached for Nico’s hand, lifting it out of the warm water.
“Can you touch me?” Will asked just above a whisper.
“Yeah. Can you touch me too?”
“Of course.”
Nico crawled into Will’s lap, wrapping his arms around Will’s neck. Will breathed in deeply, letting it out.
Will reached under the water and gently traced his hands on Nico’s lower back, towards his ass.
“Is this okay?” Will whispered.
“Yeah.” Nico replied, breathing in slowly.
They sat there for a moment, only the sound of their breathing and the droplets of water from the faucet audible.
Nico moved his hands down Will’s body, his hands touched the water, making a quick noise.
“Where can I touch you?” Nico whispered into Will’s ear.
Will swallowed hard. “Wherever. I just…no finger insertion.”
Nico laughed softly at that, then nodded. “That’s a fancy way of saying that. I shall respect your wishes.”
Will shook his head with a grin. “Okay, Shakespeare .”
“That’s not even remotely close—“
They both laughed quietly with each other.
“You dork. Anyways , where can I touch you right now?” Nico asked.
“You can touch my lower body. I don’t mind when it’s you.”
Nico closed his eyes, gently situating himself on top of Will’s lap and grazing his hands over Will’s lower stomach, near his crotch.
“Was that okay? Be honest.” Nico asked.
“Yes. If you went lower I wouldn’t mind. I know you’re careful with this stuff and I appreciate it so much.” Will said, rubbing Nico’s lower back.
“Of course. Anyone should be listening to your boundaries. Especially me.”
Will nodded. “You can go lower.”
Nico carefully moved his hand to Will’s crotch and grazed the tips of his fingers there. Will hummed.
Nico then moved his hand back up to Will’s chest, tracing his tattoo.
“When you were younger, in Italy, what was your oh shit I’m queer moment?” Will asked suddenly.
Nico thought for a moment, then said, “In middle school I was obsessed with The Sims. I’d stay up playing it, and when it was night and nobody was awake but me, I’d get on there and make a gay couple. I’d make them kiss and woohoo and all that shit, then I’d realize I actually kinda wanted that for myself. Oh, and I’d also get the censorship removal mod and stare at them.”
Will laughed at that. “I was genuinely not expecting that. Mine was when I was seven, I was watching Star Wars as one does—“
“I think as you do actually.”
“ What?! Nico,” Will grinned, “ Anyways… I had already seen the movies before this, but I guess it wasn’t until I was seven did I realize I had a crush on both Leia and Han, and both Padmè and Anakin. I was like ‘What the Heck??’ Anyways, I made that my dirty little secret for a few years until I finally told my mom and she told me that it was okay.”
“I was genuinely expecting that,” Nico replied with a smirk.
“Also I love Naomi, she's amazing.”
Will smiled. “Yes. She is. I uhm..I’ve never really mentioned my dad before, right?”
Nico shook his head. “No. You haven’t, I thought it’d be weird to ask when you’ve never really mentioned it.”
“Oh. I’m sorry, I never like bringing him up. He left my mom when I was young, he would sleep around a lot and that’s where my half-siblings come into the picture. You really need to meet them, they’re great. He tries to be close with Kayla, but she doesn’t want his bullshit. Especially after he abandoned Austin and I, and our mothers. I think he just wanted a daughter. I don’t really know him, he’s a bit famous down in Texas but so was my mom, so I guess that’s just my life. Ma always kept me out of the spotlight, she didn’t want people all in my business. I appreciate that. I’m sure if I went back down there now people would recognize my last name. Like, ‘ Oh, you’re a Solace?’ I don’t want that kinda life. I don’t wanna be famous, I wanna be a doctor who lives a normal but happy life. So that’s what I chose.”
Nico nodded. “That makes sense. I’m sorry about your dad. That’s shitty of him. I would love to meet Kayla and Austin one day. I see their comments on your Insta, and the pictures of you guys together on your nightstand.”
Will smiled. “Okay, we should get outta the bath. My hands are pruny.”
“Same.” Nico replied, draining the water and following Will as he got out of the bathtub.
Will wrapped Nico in a soft, dry towel before he gave himself one.
“Whatcha wanna do now?” Will asked, putting a clean pair of boxers on.
“Continue our touch and chat?” Nico answered, already having his baggy sleep shorts on. They were probably Will’s.
“Sure!” Will said, throwing a hoodie on and walking out of the bathroom. He didn’t care to wear pants.
Will plopped down onto the bed, laying on his back.
“You still feel kinda foggy?” Nico asked, sitting next to Will.
“A little, but I feel a lot better now.” Will said with a smile.
“That’s good. What do you wanna talk about?”
“I’m not sure. Hey, how are those bracelets doing for you?” Will asked, sitting up to face Nico.
Nico grinned. “I think they’re doing okay. My sleep is a bit better, and I still have negative thoughts sometimes, but I mean, everybody does. But, I think the black tourmaline is working. Less negativity near me. I like it.”
Will nodded. “That’s awesome. I’m glad they’re helping a bit.”
Nico leaned in closer to Will, their faces only inches apart.
“Can I kiss—“
“Yes. ‘Don’t need to ask right now.” Will quickly answered, his Southern accent strong.
Nico smiled and pulled Will in for a kiss.
Notes:
i love love LOVE this chapter it’s so sweet and AUGHHHH 😭💗💗💗💗
will is becoming a lot more open and comfy with nico as time goes on, you can definitely see that in this chapter
not much life updates this time around (just moving stuff tbh)
thank you for reading, i appreciate your kudos and comments and have a good day/night!! 💕
Chapter 15: truth
Summary:
Will breathed in and out, then opened his mouth again to speak. “I’m still figuring this ace thing out,” He whispered.
Nico buried his face in Will’s neck. “And that’s valid. Take your time.” Nico replied.
Notes:
hi, second to last chapter of this fic!! i have decided to end this fic at 16 chapters because i’m starting to feel unmotivated with this story since there’s not a real plot, ykwim? like, it’s just slice of life moments as will and nico’s relationship progresses. i love it, and there might be some one-shots of this universe, but the long fics of this AU will be finished soon.
(no smut just intimate situations)
enjoy! 💖
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
Nico got on the Minecraft world, joining Jason who was also on the server.
GhostKing has joined the world.
JasonGrace34: hey neeks
GhostKing: hi
JasonGrace34: where r u
GhostKing: will and i’s base
JasonGrace34: coming
Nico started decorating more of the base, reorganizing some chests and moving his bed.
He placed him and Will’s beds in the middle of the room, next to each other.
Jason walked into the base and found Nico, instantly typing a chat message.
JasonGrace34: Nico get on my call right now
Nico joined the chat call, confused.
“Hello?” Nico asked into the computer.
“Hi. Nico, do you know what you just did?” Jason asked, clearly with a smile on his face.
“No?” Nico replied, his accent strong.
“..minecraft bed? Next to each other?”
“I have no fuckin’ clue what you’re talking about, Grace.”
Jason giggled like a schoolgirl. “It’s something that’s like, it means you’re making a move.”
Nico scoffed behind the computer screen. “Be for real right now. It’s just a video game.”
“Awe, come on, Nico, aren’t you two in love?”
“Yes. I thought that was clear already, though. You already know we’re dating, Jace.”
“I know. It’s just a fun thing. It’s cute.”
“Okay. I’ve already made moves on Will. Real life ones.”
Nico could just feel Jason’s smirk behind his screen. Nico cringed. “What do you mean by that?”
“Fuck my life!” Nico sighed, sliding his palms down his face.
“I mean that he’s my boyfriend, and we do what we want with each other. None of your business. Will has boundaries and I am not crossing them in this conversation.”
“Fair enough.”
⋆⁺₊⋆ ☀︎ ⋆⁺₊⋆
Will heard thunder boom outside, followed by the sound of rain hitting the window. He repositioned himself on the couch while Nico cleaned up his art supplies from earlier that day.
A particularly loud boom came, and Nico jumped.
“You okay?” Will asked from the couch.
Nico nodded. “Yeah. It just came out of nowhere. I don’t like sudden loud noises.”
Will nodded in response. “Wanna come here?” He asked.
Nico set the last of his paint brushes on the drying towel and walked over to where Will was sitting.
Nico sat next to Will, snuggling up with him.
“Thunderstorms are comforting but also terrifying at the same time.” Nico said.
“Yeah. I feel the same way. What do you wanna do?”
“I dunno. How about we lay here and kiss. Maybe watch something on TV.”
Will smiled. “Sure, let’s put on that fake fireplace channel.”
Nico laughed. “Oh my God. That’s perfect.”
Will put on the fake fireplace channel and they laid there, neither one saying anything.
Will opened his mouth to say something but closed it.
“Hm?” Nico hummed.
“Nothin’” Will replied.
“What is it?” Nico asked softly, facing Will with a small smile.
“I don’t know. I guess I just…thank you.”
“What? For what?”
“Being okay with my identity.” Will breathed.
“Of course, Will, anyone should be. Fuck Abby. You deserve the world and more.”
“I—thank you. There were some other people in the past that had a problem with me too.”
“Who.” Nico said, and it wasn’t a question.
Will shook his head. “Just some guys at this college party. Before we met.”
“Will..I’m so sorry that you had to deal with them.”
“It’s okay. They were drunk. Although, I don’t think they were lyin’ about what they said. ‘Doesn’t matter anymore.”
“Does what they said still bother you?” Nico asked as more booms of thunder continued.
“Not really. Abby does, but not some random guys.”
Nico nodded. “Okay.”
After a while of laying together and listening to both the rain storm and the fake fire crackling, Will had a feeling rise in his heart.
He wanted something. Not sex, but something more important, something more real .
The only issue is, Will’s not quite sure what that thing is. Maybe he should ask Nico.
“Hey,” Will whispered, “can I ask you somethin’?”
Nico repositioned his head onto Will’s chest. “Sure.”
“What is something that you feel is intimate and personal that’s not sex?”
Nico hummed. “I..I don’t know, I guess it depends. Making out? That dry humping we tried? Would you like us to just touch each other? Whatever you feel like. It doesn’t have to be right now, if you wanna wait a bit and think about it.”
Will stared at the flames on the TV. It was dark in the living room except for the TV and a small lamp sitting by the window.
“Uhm…I wanna try dry humping again. Wanna be on top?” Will said just above a whisper.
“Yeah. Here let me take my shirt off.”
Nico slipped out of his t-shirt and so did Will. They both sat there in their boxers, staring at each other.
“I..I’m still not very used to these types of situations.” Will mumbled.
Nico gave Will a gentle smile. “That’s totally okay. We’ll take our time with it, yeah? Go slow. I can crawl on top of you and you can tell me what you’d like, okay?”
Will nodded, laying back with his head leaned against a pillow. Nico crawled on top of Will, sitting with his knees on each side of Will’s hips and his—his crotch on top of Will’s. They had underwear on, but Will was slightly freaking out. Not because he doesn’t want this, no..he really wanted this! It’s mainly because he’s only done this once before and backed out before it got too much. He doesn’t wanna do that this time, he thinks.
Nico leaned down and pushed Will’s blond hair behind his ear, out of his face.
“What would you like me to do? What movements?” Nico murmured softly.
“Just..uhm..Nico, I—I don’t know..”
“ Hey. Breathe, okay? Amore…what’s going on? Tell me.”
Will breathed out, his bare chest rising and falling. “I’m just nervous..I really want this. But it’s so foreign to me. I’ve never done this stuff before you.”
Nico nodded. “You’re okay. If you ever want to stop, let me know immediately. Okay?”
“Okay.”
Nico took a deep breath and situated himself on top of Will, grabbing onto Will’s shoulders and slowly moving his hips back and forth.
Will breathed out quickly, relaxing into the nice feeling. This was good, this was fine.
“Faster?” Will asked quietly.
“Of course.”
Nico started moving quicker, and Will’s body tensed up, specifically his lower body.
“Mmm.” Will hummed, barely familiar with this feeling.
“Does it feel nice?” Nico asked, breathless.
“Yeah,” Will breathed, “I think I’m done. I feel it coming but I’m kind of uncomfortable with it.”
Nico stopped, and plopped down on top of Will, their bare chests touching.
They were both erect, but neither one cared that much. Although, Will was slightly embarrassed. He knows he doesn’t need to be, but he’s never been hard around someone before.
“Nico…” Will murmured.
“Hmm?” Nico hummed in response.
“Was that okay, is this okay?” Will asked, motioning towards their crotches.
“What do you mean?”
“Just..I’ve never been this vulnerable with someone before.”
Nico snuggled close to Will, pushing more hair out of Will’s face. “That’s okay. It’s perfectly fine, it’s a natural thing. If it makes you uncomfy we don’t have to do that again. Here’s a blanket to cover us.”
Nico grabbed a thick throw blanket and covered them with it. “Better?” He asked.
Will nodded. “Yeah. Thank you.” Will said with a smile.
Will breathed in and out, then opened his mouth again to speak. “I’m still figuring this ace thing out,” He whispered.
Nico buried his face in Will’s neck. “And that’s valid. Take your time.” Nico replied.
Will smiled. “I will try. It’s hard, but I feel like I learn new things about myself every day.”
Nico smiled softly at Will. “Me too. Especially since I met you. You opened more of my mind, more of my heart.”
“That’s…that’s so sweet …Nico,”
“It’s true. Believe it.”
Will grinned, snuggling closer to Nico.
Notes:
warning for mentions of disordered eating below.
my eating habits keep going from slightly normal to almost non existent, it’s so weird and idk what to do abt it. it’s not severe, but it’s probably something i should talk about more with my therapist. (i only just slightly mentioned it to her)
anyways, other than that we’re extremely close to moving into our new house. i’m so excited, that’s like all i can think abt rn. (other than my stories haha)
i hope you enjoyed this chap, see you later this week for the last one! ( it’s rlly short and sweet :) ) i already started my next writing project, i only just started it so i can’t give an estimate on when i’ll start posting it, but it’s solangelo (obviously lmaooo) and it’s gotta do with road trips…another AU!!! that’s all i’ll say for that atm, and btw in that fic i’ll continue to update on my life if there’s anything interesting to say. in the meantime i’ll post one-shots and stuff :)
i hope you have a good day/night, & i appreciate your kudos & comments! 🩷
Chapter 16: fate
Summary:
“Before all that..I actually saw you for the first time on the train. Needless to say, I was pinin’ from the start. Head over heels, I was gone. There was no point in savin’ me then. I had already fallen.” Will said with an accent.
Chapter Text
april
Will and Nico sat on the beach, Will staring at Nico as the sunlight shone down on him. It was a really nice day, it was pretty warm, and the sun was out.
Will smiled as Nico squinted at the sun that was starting to set. Will reached for Nico’s hand.
Nico took it mindlessly, glancing back at Will.
Nico shook his head with a grin. “I love you, Will.”
That warm fuzzy feeling rose in Will’s stomach. He doesn’t know why, he’s not a teenager with a silly little crush anymore.
“I know. I love you too.” Will murmured, the seagulls singing in the distance.
Nico glanced back at the horizon, a small smile plastered on his face.
“I’m so happy I met you.” Nico said, turning his head to face Will again.
“I’m happy too. And to think it was MatchMe—“
Nico laughed. “Right. If you hadn’t answered my message with probably not enough information, we’d only have met at the Starbucks. And I don’t think I would've had the courage to talk to you.”
“Before all that..I actually saw you for the first time on the train. Needless to say, I was pinin’ from the start. Head over heels, I was gone. There was no point in savin’ me then. I had already fallen.” Will said with an accent.
Nico’s wide grin got wider, somehow. “ Really? I don’t think I noticed you then.”
“Probably not. It’s a big city, you see lots of faces each day. But the fact that we crossed paths more than once by accident, sounds like fate to me.”
Nico nodded. “Definitely.”
Will’s cheeks were on fire. His heart was full. This is what he’s been wanting for a long time. Now it’s a reality.
“I would like to kiss you,” Will said as the sun dipped deeper into the horizon, making the sky so colorful. It looked like one of Nico’s watercolor paintings.
“I would like it if you kissed me.” Nico answered, leaning in closer to his boyfriend’s lips.
They kissed, and it was the best thing Will could’ve asked for.
you are in love.
true love.
you are in love.
Notes:
last chapter…i am emotional. this entire series is based off of the song ‘you are in love’ by taylor swift and to be honest, before the taylor’s version came out, i never really thought about this song. then 1989 (taylor’s version) came out and i heard the you are in love re-recording…i was losing my shit LMAOO.. it’s such an underrated song by her, and it’s grown to probably be my favorite off of 1989. thank you for reading my mini essay :)
like i said last chapter, this probably won’t be the last time we see will and nico from this universe. i love them too dearly to leave them permanently in my google docs to never be visited again lol
thank you to whoever has read this far, thank you so much for keeping up with my story. i appreciate it dearly <3
at the moment, you can probably tell i’m focusing on posting shorter stories like one-shots and short multi chaps. that’s because i constantly have ideas flowing through my head on stories and i write stuff almost daily (despite my awful veritgo and headhaches due to dehydration and my med withdrawal..im still pushing through!!)
my next long fic project is gonna be a solangelo runaway road trip au, set in the late 2000s. i have an outline of what i’d like to make it look like (slightly) but im working on it as i type this. i dont like posting chapters of fics that aren’t even remotely close to being finished, just in case i do end up losing interest in the specific au or plot i’ve made up. i dont think that’ll happen with this one lol but i want to make sure i dont leave you guys hanging on an unfinished story.
anyways, i hope you enjoyed this fic and im so happy with how it turned out. im gonna be real for a sec, the way i write will & nico (especially in this series) is the exact type of relationship i would like for myself when im older. idk if it sounds dumb but yeah..lol i just want a loving relationship that’s not built off of sexual stuff. one that’s more built off of mutual respect and understanding, genuine love and care. ok im done rambling now..thank you sm for reading and i appreciate you guys so much. kudos and comments are appreciated as always, and have a great day/night!! 💗
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