Chapter Text
Han Jisung was a virgin, and he fucking hated it.
Not for any reason in particular. Or, rather, for a myriad of reasons — ranging from societal pressure to social obligation to horny.
It was hard. He only had three three friends, and his three friends were also his roommates, so it’s not like he got out all that much. The only parties he went to were in his own home, so he wasn’t even going to parties so much as he was not leaving his house.
He could maybe, potentially find someone to hook up with at said parties, but everyone was always wasted and there was a fairly consistent cast of characters that Jisung was uninterested in. Some of them were hot, sure, but not hot enough that Jisung was willing to risk the embarrassment of approaching them and… What, flirting?
That was one of the reasons it was hard. Jisung wasn't a people person, and he never had been. He was awkward and too blunt. Even when he tried to make himself normal and chill and likable, he was shy. Regular, everyday social situations made his head hurt. The logistics of hooking up with someone made him feel like he was drowning.
How was he supposed to, like, approach someone he potentially wanted to hook up with? What would they talk about? How would he transition from the talking to the having sex? Where would they have sex? He shared a bedroom with Jeongin. What was he gonna do, bring someone into their bedroom mid-party?
Changbin did that, but he and Chan had their own rooms. Jisung tried to watch Changbin flirt with the girls at their parties, but he seemed to lean pretty heavily on the fact that he had muscles and a reputation of being good in bed.
Jisung had neither of those things. Well, he had some muscle, he went to the gym and shit, but his t-shirts didn’t look like they were cutting off the circulation on his biceps and they definitely didn’t stretch taught over his chest. He went to the gym because it was “bad for his health” to sit and make music all day long, not because he had an endless passion for it. Changbin probably slept with so many girls and never settled down with any of them because they would have to compete with his one true love, the gym.
It’s not like Jisung wanted to settle down. He didn’t even know how to navigate some basic flirting, how was he supposed to navigate the intricacies of a romantic relationship? Especially the beginning parts, where there was so much coyness and tiptoeing around each other.
He thought of Chan, and his embarrassing crush on the guy he was tutoring, and the way he blushed and stuttered and denied, denied, denied whenever he came up — which was all the time, because Chan couldn’t talk about anything else. Jisung didn’t want to deal with anything like that.
No matter how much Jisung tried to fake his way through it with humor and faux confidence and indifference, he just didn’t get people. Not like Changbin, who made everyone laugh and had girls flocking towards him. Not like Chan, who was sweet and polite and managed to make everyone feel comfortable. Not like Jeongin, who was outgoing and made friends easily even if he didn’t necessarily get people, either.
No matter how many dating shows or romantic comedies he made Jeongin watch with him against his will, Jisung could not understand how he was supposed to approach pursuing someone.
He didn’t even really know how to make friends. Jeongin was basically a built-in friend — they had been inseparable since Jisung was two years old and a family moved in across the street with a cute little baby. He was friends with Changbin and Chan because Chan was nice and perceptive and noticed he didn’t have any. Jisung was on his own for his freshman year of college, Jeongin was a year younger.
Chan and Changbin insisted it was because Jisung was funny and a musical genius, but Jisung was pretty confident that their friendship stemmed from the fact that he was persistently alone in the back of every class.
And no matter how much he thought and thought and thought about how to approach the whole losing his virginity situation, he came up blank.
Until, the admissions and records office.
He needed a copy of his transcripts for a summer music program application. It was prestigious and hard to get into, but Jisung was feeling confident. If there was one thing he was confident in, it was his music. Everything else was a little iffy, but that was okay. He had his music.
The lady at the front desk took his ten dollars and moved into another room to do whatever it was she said she was doing. Jisung wasn’t paying attention, because as she moved away she revealed the most handsome man to ever exist.
He was in the back of the office, filing papers. Jisung was glad there was no one else in there, because he was pretty sure his mouth was open and his eyes were glazed over. This guy was an unbelievable kind of gorgeous, the kind that had Jisung questioning whether he was a person or a statue sculpted by someone with tremendous talent.
“Hey,” Jisung called out, before he could think to stop himself. The guy looked up from his filing with what Jisung registered as a slightly irritated look, but it melted away soon after. He looked Jisung up and down. Jisung’s skin prickled.
“Do you need something?” He asked, bluntly. Jisung felt the need to bounce on the heels of his feet to expel some of the energy that had rapidly built in his system. He did need something.
“Do you wanna have sex with me?” Jisung called across the office. The guy's eyes widened comically large. He looked around the office, as if to see if there was anyone else Jisung could be talking to. When he realized there was no one, he shuffled over to the desk.
“Huh?” He leaned towards Jisung, confusion all over his features.
“Do you wanna have sex with me?” Jisung repeated, because now that this guy was closer he was even more entranced. He resisted the urge to reach out and touch his face, to confirm that he was indeed flesh and blood and not sculpted marble.
“Uh.” He gave Jisung another once over. “Yeah, sure.”
Jisung beamed. That was so much easier than he thought it was going to be.
“Cool,” Jisung said, “When?”
“I get off at three.” The guy shrugged. “Then?”
Jisung nodded enthusiastically. He pulled out his phone and opened a new contact.
“I’m Jisung, by the way,” he said, as he handed his phone over.
The guy took it and started tapping. “Minho.”
“Cool,” Jisung took his phone back. “Text me when you’re off?” He sent a quick text to Minho so he would have his number, too.
Minho nodded. “I’ll send you my address.”
So that’s how Jisung ended up at Minho’s apartment. It was cute – organized and tidy. It was in pretty sharp contrast to Jisung’s own house, which was kind of a wasteland. They had, like, no furniture and it was questionably clean.
“What’s your major?” Jisung asked, because that was the one question he learned to ask people when he arrived at this university.
“Biomedical engineering,” Minho answered, leading Jisung through his living room and back down a hallway.
“Jesus,” Jisung said. “So you’re, like, smart?”
Minho shrugged.
“I don’t bottom,” he said, as he opened the door to his bedroom. His bedroom looked a little more like Jisung’s house — there wasn’t a lot in there. There was a mattress on the floor, a TV, and a dresser.
Jisung shrugged this time. “I can bottom.”
Jisung didn’t really know what he could and couldn’t do, but Minho was approaching this with such a casual disposition that Jisung assumed he knew what he was doing and would lead the way.
“Cool,” Minho said. He turned around to look at Jisung.
Minho stared at him, put a hand on his face. Jisung felt the skin of his cheek erupt into tingles at the contact.
“You’re really fucking adorable,” Minho mumbled.
Jisung’s face got extremely hot, all of a sudden.
“Are you embarrassed?” Minho grinned, and Jisung very quickly felt like he was out of his depth. Minho’s smile bordered on predatory; Jisung felt his blood start to rush away from his head faster than his brain function could keep up with.
“No,” Jisung stubbornly replied.
“Huh,” Minho said. “You look a little embarrassed, Jisung.”
Jisung shifted his weight from foot to foot. He was lightheaded.
“I’m not,” Jisung insisted.
Minho hummed. He sat down on the edge of his bed, which looked a little silly because his bed was on the floor, and his legs splayed out kind of awkwardly. He looked both so hot and so confident that it didn’t matter.
He patted his lap. “C’mere.”
Jisung scrambled to comply. Minho had both hands on his ass immediately, squeezing hard. Jisung moaned completely on accident.
“Oh?” Minho laughed a little. “Are you sensitive, Jisungie?”
Something about this extremely hot, virtual stranger speaking to him so affectionately was making the lightheadedness worse.
“No.”
Minho spread his legs out, moved Jisung so he was straddling one of his thighs. Jisung gasped at being maneuvered so easily, with such confidence. Minho grinned again, and put his hands on Jisung’s hips to shift him so his (already achingly hard, when did that happen?) cock was pressing down on him. Jisung folded forward into his shoulder with a strangled noise.
“No?” Minho repeated, amused. The delighted tone of his voice made Jisung’s head spin. Minho moved Jisung’s hips down on his thigh again, and Jisung was moaning instead of responding.
“This okay?” Minho asked
Jisung nodded fervently.
“Yes, yes – yeah, definitely –” he moaned again as Minho established a rhythm grinding his hips down for him. “Okay.”
“You’re so cute,” Minho sighed. “And so forward, hm?”
Jisung’s head was swimming with how good the friction felt, and how good Minho’s voice sounded so close to his ear.
“I get a lot of odd requests in that fucking office,” Minho laughed. “Sex is a first.”
Jisung’s hips were now moving to their own accord, against the hard muscle of Minho’s thigh. Fuck, Minho was muscular. Jisung’s brain had gone fuzzy.
“Mmhm,” Jisung replied, more focused on the drag of his dick against Minho than whatever he was saying. He was mouth breathing on Minho’s neck, and he vaguely registered that he was making a lot of noise, but he didn’t particularly care when his mind was so hazy.
“Do you just wanna get off on my thigh, Jisung?”
Jisung shook his head.
“No, ah –” Jisung hit a good angle rutting himself against Minho. “N-no, I want you to fuck me.”
The whole point of this was for him to “lose his virginity”, which meant someone had to get penetrated. He could practically hear Chan moaning about heteronormative constructs based in purity culture, but he didn’t give a shit. Someone was getting penetrated this afternoon, and it wasn’t gonna be Minho, apparently, so it had to be him.
Minho exhaled rather shakily, and maneuvered Jisung out of his lap. Jisung sat on the edge of the bed and watched as Minho walked over to his closet and pulled out lube and a condom. Jisung’s dick twitched.
Minho crowded in between his legs and stared down at him. Jisung was short circuiting.
“You’re so hot,” Jisung breathed, awestruck. Minho laughed.
“Thanks.” Minho put his hand on Jisung’s cheek again, and Jisung gasped at the contact. He crouched down to slide his hand down Jisung’s neck, then down his chest. Jisung’s whole body erupted into little bumps.
Minho slipped his fingers under the hem of Jisung’s shirt and looked at him. Jisung stared back at him with big eyes.
“Can I…?” He started pulling up Jisung’s shirt. Jisung nodded vigorously.
“Yes. Please.”
“Please?” Minho repeated, the grin coming back. It was toothy and smug, and Jisung shifted in his seat on the bed. He nodded again.
“So polite,” Minho teased, and pulled off Jisung’s shirt. The air on his skin made him shiver; the little bumps got worse.
Minho pulled off his own shirt, standing back up in the process. If Jisung was short circuiting before, now his mind has been wiped completely clear.
Minho put the tip of his thumb in Jisung’s open mouth.
“Like what you see?” Minho was definitely making fun of him — or, Jisung was pretty sure — but he wasn’t present enough to fully process that. He nodded up at him.
“Lay down,” Minho demanded. Jisung readily compiled.
Minho unbuttoned his pants, and Jisung accidentally made a noise in his throat. Minho started pulling off his jeans. Jisung scrambled to slip off his sweats in response.
He couldn’t believe how easy this was – he had spent all this time agonizing about his status as a virgin, when all he had to do was walk into the admissions and records office and ask someone? Chan made this look so much harder than it actually was. Maybe Jisung should start thinking less more often.
Minho leaned down and hooked his fingers under Jisung’s waistband. Jisung's body jolted a little.
“Still okay?” Minho looked up at him.
“Definitely,” Jisung nodded, staring down at this super hot guy’s hands near his dick. He looked up at Minho’s face, and then back down at his hands, then back up at his face. Minho was so hot, holy shit.
Minho proceeded to pull off Jisung’s underwear and toss them to the side.
“Scoot back,” Minho nodded towards the top of the bed. Jisung scrambled back, spreading his legs open. He had never been naked in front of anyone in his life, and he thought it would be a lot more uncomfortable. As it turned out, he was too turned on to care.
“Fuck,” Minho mumbled appreciatively. “I’m so glad I agreed to cover that shift today.”
Jisung opened his legs wider. Minho grabbed a pillow from by Jisung’s head and stuffed it under his hips, settling in between his legs. He clicked open the lube and poured it on his fingers; Jisung pushed his hips up towards him.
Jisung gasped and also kind of cringed when Minho started circling a finger around him. The lube was cold and wet, and it felt weird.
“Okay?” Minho asked.
“Yeah.” Jisung was starting to get used to it. This was completely new territory for him, but his spiked nerves started to settle as the lube warmed up.
“Can I…?” Minho pressed his finger against him with more pressure.
“Yeah,” Jisung repeated. Minho pressed a finger into him, and he cringed again. It didn't feel bad, necessarily, just kind of intrusive.
Minho started rubbing his thigh – it was probably supposed to be soothing, but he was doing it kind of harshly. Somehow, that made it more grounding.
“You’re really tight,” Minho said, as he pumped his finger slowly in and out. Jisung was starting to adjust. It was weird, but not unpleasant. He also liked being watched so intently by Minho: his eyes were sharp and unwavering on Jisung. It made his skin feel like it was on fire.
“Another?” Minho asked. His finger was moving without any problem now, so Jisung thought another was probably fine. He nodded.
It didn’t feel quite so weird this time. The stretch was actually kind of nice; Jisung felt pleasantly full.
“Okay?” Minho asked, again.
“You ask that a lot,” Jisung moved his hips down on Minho’s hand a little, chasing more. He was liking this. He liked this.
“Because you’re a stranger and my fingers are in you."
“Are we strangers still, then?”
“Yes,” Minho crooked his fingers in Jisung, started thrusting them in with more intention.
“I think maybe – ohmygodfuck," Jisung arched up off the bed, pressing his hips towards Minho. “Fuck, what – ah, oh my god.”
It went from feeling pleasant to mind numbingly good, and Jisung was experiencing whiplash. His head was thrown back, his eyes squeezed shut as Minho fucked his fingers into him.
“You like that?”
Jisung opened his eyes to look up at Minho. His grin was back, like he already knew what the answer was. Jisung nodded anyway, moans spilling from his parted lips.
“Seems like it,” Minho ran his hand down Jisung’s flushed chest; Jisung felt half like he was being made fun of, half like he was being admired, and all the way turned on.
Minho kept pressing his fingers into him, and Jisung was starting to feel a familiar heat pooling in his stomach. He needed to move this along.
“Okay, I’m – you can –”
Minho scissored his fingers inside of him.
“Are you sure?” Minho looked at him, “You’re really tight.” Minho said again, but it sounded a little more winded this time. Satisfaction flowed through Jisung.
“Yes, yeah,” he panted, even though he wasn’t really sure. He didn’t know what the fuck he was doing, he just knew he needed Minho’s dick inside of him before he came on his fingers. Minho pulled his hand away. Jisung winced, and Minho rubbed his thigh apologetically before reaching for the condom.
“How do you like it?”
Jisung shrugged. “I’ve never done this before.”
“Wait,” Minho yanked back. “What?”
“I’ve never done this before,” Jisung repeated.
“Like, with a guy?”
Jisung shook his head. “With anybody.”
Minho groaned. He started crawling away from Jisung.
“I am not taking your virginity right now.” Minho stood off the bed.
“What the fuck?” Jisung sat up. “Why not?”
“I don't wanna be, like,” Minho gestured at him. “A core memory for you. This cannot be a pivotal moment in your life.”
“You think this is going to be a pivotal moment in my life?” Jisung scoffed. Minho rolled his eyes and went to grab his clothes.
“Come on,” Jisung’s voice was high and whiny, but he didn’t care. “Just fuck me!”
“Absolutely not.” Minho pulled his jeans back on.
“Who cares?” Jisung whined. “The concept of virginity is stupid!”
Minho shrugged. He tucked his boner into his waistband.
“Maybe.” He zipped up his jeans. “But you don’t know how you’re going to react, and I don’t want you getting attached to me.”
“Attached to you?” Jisung scoffed, again.
Minho shrugged, again. “Not worth the risk.”
Jisung scooted to the edge of the bed.
“C’mon, Minho.” He looked up at Minho with pleading eyes. “I’m all ready for you. Fuck me.”
Minho stared at him. Jisung thought that maybe he had changed his mind.
“No,” he said. “Go home.”
Jisung groaned. He got up to start putting on his clothes, too.
“This is stupid,” Jisung said as he slipped his sweats back on. “We’re, like, halfway done!”
“Go home,” Minho repeated. He walked to his bedroom door and opened it. Jisung pulled on his shirt.
“I cannot believe you’re kicking me out after you fingered me,” Jisung grumbled.
“Yup,” Minho walked them out to the front door. “It was nice to meet you.”
“Your fingers were just in me!” Jisung yelled. “What do you mean it was nice to meet you?!”
“I mean it was nice to meet you.” Minho opened the front door. “Bye.”
Jisung groaned and stomped out the door.
“Where were you?” Jeongin asked, as soon as Jisung stomped into their bedroom. He had stomped all the way home.
“Nowhere.” Jisung collapsed onto his bed and curled on his side facing the wall.
“Um, okay,” Jeongin responded. “Do you want to start the treehouse lego set?”
“Too much work,” Jisung whined. Jeongin also made a whiny sound.
“You guys keep saying that!” He complained. “I’m trying to spend quality time with my friends!”
Jisung waved him off.
There was a knock at the door.
“What?” Jeongin yelled. Jisung heard the door open. He kept staring at the wall.
“Hey,” Changbin said. “Just a warning, I’m having someone over.”
“Is it the same girl from last night?” Jeongin tentatively asked.
“No.”
“Thank god,” Jeongin sighed. “I feel like she had to be playing that up, right? Like, that had to be dramatic.”
“Hurtful, baby bread,” Changbin said. “Maybe I was just really on my game last night.”
“Ew.” Jeongin’s face was likely twisted in disgust; Jisung could practically see it. “Get out.”
Changbin laughed and closed the door.
“I hate him,” Jisung grumbled.
“What?”
“I hate him,” Jisung repeated, louder.
“No you don’t.”
“I do,” Jisung insisted. “I hate him.”
He felt his bed dip at his feet, and then Jeongin was worming his way between Jisung and the wall.
“You’re in a mood.” Jeongin looked at him. “What happened?”
Jisung had just been blue-balled by the hottest guy of all time for being a virgin, that’s what happened. He would die before he admitted that to his best friend, though.
“Nothing.”
Jeongin squinted. “Are you sure?”
Jisung nodded.
“Fine.” Jeongin left it alone. “I don’t have to go to dance practice until later tonight. Do you wanna finish the video we were watching?”
Jisung nodded again.
So it turned out losing his virginity wasn’t “so easy”. And now Jisung was fucked, because he didn’t want just anyone anymore. He wanted Minho from the admissions and records office.
Not because he was attached — fuck Minho for saying that, by the way — but because he was stubborn. Just because he was a virgin didn’t mean he was gonna fall in love with the guy the second he put his dick in him. Fucking dumbass.
Even if he was a dumbass, he was also the hottest man Jisung had ever seen in his life, and he couldn’t stop thinking about his face, or his thighs, or his hands. It had been over a week, and no matter how many times Jisung jerked off in the shower to the thought of his fingers inside of him, he couldn’t get it out of his system or out of his head. In fact, he was probably making it worse.
He thought about texting him, but that seemed super embarrassing. Like, not more embarrassing than getting kicked out of his apartment for being a virgin right as they were about to fuck, but it definitely would add salt to the wound. He didn’t want to seem desperate.
There was enough desperation floating around in the house. Chan was still mega obsessed with the guy he was tutoring – who turned out to be Jeongin’s friend Felix from dance, Jisung guessed? Even worse: Felix brought Hwang Hyunjin to the party they had on Friday, and Changbin decided he absolutely needed him. He was being as annoying as humanly possible about it. Jisung knew for a fact he would be over it within a couple days, but it was still irritating.
The two of them, in their desperation, invited Felix and Hyunjin over to start working on the treehouse lego set Jeongin had been begging them to build. Or more accurately: Chan invited Felix and Changbin begged him to invite Hyunjin too.
Jisung knew Hyunjin from his Wednesday lecture. He seemed nice enough, but he was also closed off, quiet and shy — also, insanely gorgeous. There was no way Changbin was pulling him, and Jisung was quite frankly sick of hearing about it. He really wanted Minho from the admissions and records office, but he didn’t make that his friends’ problem... Not just because it was humiliating and he didn’t want to talk about it.
Jisung watched from his place on the floor behind the coffee table as Felix and Hyunjin filed into the house. Chan and Changbin were, of course, falling all over themselves and behaving like fools. Nothing interesting or new.
Then, Minho from the admissions and records office walked in behind them.
Jisung went into fight or flight. The doorway chatter drowned out. How was he going to handle this? Pretend he didn’t know him? Act like nothing happened? Disappear into his bedroom before Minho saw him?
Too late for that. Minho’s eyes widened briefly when they landed on him. His face quickly fell back into neutrality.
“Does this lego set require eight people?” Minho asked. He started following everyone into the living room, but he looked like he was about to bolt. Jisung could relate.
“Seungmin will actually be more unhelpful than helpful,” Hyunjin responded.
Jisung thought again about just leaving, but Jeongin would call him out on ditching their lego set, and Minho had already seen him. He took a deep breath.
The couch was already taken, and Seungmin (he guessed this guy’s name was Seungmin?) was on the end of the coffee table farthest from Jisung. Minho had the option to sit next to Jisung at the other end, or right across from him. Minho was hesitating, obviously trying to decide which would be the least intrusive.
He decided on sitting next to him, so if he stared forward he didn’t have to look at him.
At least, that’s what Jisung hypothesized, because he was very adamantly staring forward. Jisung was happy (or relieved, at least) about not being under Minho’s gaze, but his skin had started buzzing at being in such close proximity to him. Fuck, he wanted him.
Jisung poured all of his focus into the lego set. He kept his mouth shut and his gaze down.
As it turned out, the the guy who refused to fuck Jisung because he was a virgin also was inextricably connected to his friend group. He quickly figured out that dance captain Minho, Jeongin’s friend Minho, was also Minho from the admissions and records office. He was friends with Jeongin, friends and roommates with Chan’s tutee slash crush, and friends with the object of Changbin’s (arguably borderline unhealthy) obsession.
Minho was closer to a mutual friend than a stranger. Jisung didn’t know which was worse.