Chapter Text
A few days have passed since the big revelation. The brothers slowly went back to their daily activities that they had paused due to the situation- including training. In general, the lair had an awkward atmosphere since the brothers found out about Donatello's origin. They still went about as usual, but they didn’t bring up the subject much. If they did, they usually danced around it, dropping off hints so that everyone would understand what they were referring to.
Well, at least it was true for three of the brothers. Donatello, himself, found himself acting actually quite nonchalant when it came to bringing up the subject. He wouldn’t straight up say that the Shredder was his father, but he wasn’t as awkward as his brothers, and even his father. When his brothers or father asked about how he could be so calm and not nervous, he would answer with something like: “I’m simply trying to get used to it. It’s a fact that cannot be changed, and avoiding it forever will just be more unpleasant.”
It didn’t mean that he took the information well or mentally accepted it in the first place- if anything, he is having the hardest time with it. However, as a logical person, Donatello chose not to avoid the topic too much given that it’s going to become a huge problem in the near future. Still, he would be very uncomfortable or depressed whenever he thought about it. However, from the outside, he seemed usually nonchalant and calm. Donatello was always good with hiding his emotions. Well, most of the time. He would talk about it whenever it’s necessary, or if he just needs to release some steam in general.
By going back to his daily life and acting as usual, Donatello had hoped that it would make him feel better, and at least feel distracted enough from the fact that there’s going to be a very difficult future ahead of him in terms of his family’s enemies.
“No way!” Raph exclaimed as he crossed his hands with his usual annoyed frown.
“Donnie, you know that it’s a bad idea…” Leo said with a little more empathy than Raph displayed, as he wore a sad expression.
Yesterday, the brothers went back to patrol for the first time since they’ve taken the break over Donatello’s news. Well, specifically Leo, Raph and Mikey. Quite obviously, now that the Shredder is probably aware of his and Donnie’s… relations, the family has decided that they will go back to patrols, and Donatello will stay at home with Splinter until they deem it safe enough for him to leave again. Of course Donatello had objected, but they refused to listen. So today, he tried again. The brothers stood in the living room as Donatello tried to change their minds.
“But- guys! You know that I can’t stay down here forever! When will you decide that it’s safe enough for me to leave?- when the Shredder passes of old age?!” Donatello exclaimed, with annoyance, but slight desperation.
“You know that I need to breathe some fresh air. The last thing that I need right now is to stay stuck here!” Donatello threw his arms back in aggravation as he slightly raised his voice.
“Wouldn’t it be dangerous, dude?” Mikey asked as he frowned worryingly.
“Not just dangerous- it would be entirely stupid!” Raph growled as he glared at Donnie. Raph is known to have a short fuse, but it wasn’t hard to notice that he became more protective of Donnie- especially now that their enemies might target him.
“I don’t know, D…” Mikey said, feeling guilty that he speaks against him. He totally understands Donnie. He needs to go out every once in a while as well, but it’s too dangerous for his big brother as of now.
Donatello frowned, frustrated as he glared at Leo, trying to make him change his mind and help him out.
Leo’s expression saddened, but his eyes signaled that he stays firm with his opinion.
“You know that you cannot do that, Donatello.” Splinter said as he entered the living room calmly.
“Sensei, I need this! I’ll lose my mind at some point if I stay here forever! I just learned of where I really came from. I need a break…” Donatello said as he gave him his “sadorable” eyes, with frustration lacing his words.
Splinter closed his eyes as he sighed and composed himself.
“I apologize, Donatello. We are not doing this out of bad intentions, we simply want to keep you safe.” He said as he gave Donatello an empathetic expression.
Donatello looked at the floor as his expression displayed his sadness. Another failed attempt at trying to get back to patrol, and normalcy.
“Sorry, Donnie.” Leo said as he moved beside Donnie and squeezed his shoulder.
Donatello turned his gaze up again and looked at his family. They all seemed to empathize with him- even Raph seemed to feel slightly guilty of being firm towards him. Donatello sighed as he nodded.
“Fine.” He said.
They all stood in silence for a few awkward seconds, as Donatello’s sadness left an unpleasant atmosphere in the room.
“You don’t hate us. Right?” Mikey asked awkwardly and with slight fear as he changed his weight from one leg to another, swaying as he waited for a response.
“No- no I don’t. I’m simply sad is all.” Donatello said as he scratched the back of his neck awkwardly.
“There’s no need to be sad, Don. We just want to wait until it’s safe enough. Just listen to us for now. Alright?” Raph said, trying to stay firm, yet he still felt guilty.
“Alright. I will. But you better not drag this out for too long.” Donatello said, slightly aggravated as he glared at them with a warning.
“Hey, don’t worry. Alright? We will make sure of that.” Leo said, smiling as he patted Donnie’s shell.
“Good.” Donatello huffed. He still wished that he could leave, but it’s probably unrealistic as of now, and he pretty much knows this already.
However, that means that his brothers leave for patrol without him, and sometimes April and Casey join them as well. If the foot is planning something, then they might be in grave danger. Somehow, more than they were in before.
Truly, Donatello may want to leave because he needs a distraction and some fresh air, but deep down, he knows that it’s because he wants to keep his family and friends safe. To be there with them… Something is going to happen, whether it’s now or later. Donatello doesn’t want to feel worried for his family and friends while he’s all safe and comfortable in the lair. It’s wrong. He should be there to protect them or even surrender in their place if it were to become too dangerous. The Shredder will probably go after him, after all. Wouldn’t he? It’s good if Donatello could offer himself as a price for his family and friends’ safety while they stay safe and sound, but that is only if the situation is too dire. No one would want to be at the mercy of the Shredder. Not Donatello, at least.
Donnie frowned in worry as he understood that all of this mess is simply the beginning of a probably very long and painful story. He has a gut feeling that he should savor whatever time he has left with his family.
Donatello bit his lip in anxiety as he felt fear wash over him. He had a very bad feeling about everything that was occurring lately. Shredder has always tried to harm them, but now, it might be much more extreme.
Donatello shuddered as he forced his thoughts away.
‘I’m probably overreacting. Right?’