Chapter Text
"Mum! Dad!” The girl cried, running towards her parents. Hilda felt overjoyed that they had finally caught up to those mysterious figures they had been chasing. Even if she had no luck so far finding her own Mum, she at least had made a difference here. Or at least, that was her train of thought, until she heard the parents' response.
“Johanna!”
Hilda, in that moment, was oddly reminded of the time she, as a troll, had turned to stone, or at least with regards to how suddenly her thoughts seemed to freeze. Johanna, not her Mum because surely the name was a coincidence, caught her parents in a tight embrace. But now that the connection had been established, the child she had been exploring with did start to look familiar. But how could the child, because that was a child, at least a few years younger than Hilda, be the same person as the Mum Hilda knew?
Hilda didn’t get to where she was now by dismissing things as mere coincidence, though.
But still, she had to be sure. And she couldn’t just ask, 'hey, are you my Mum?' without it being weird.
“Uh, excuse me,” Hilda started. Johanna’s parents looked over at her. She tried not to let her voice waver. “Are you related to an Astrid by any chance?”
“Yes, actually, she’s my sister” Johanna’s dad (her grandfather?) responded. “How did you know?”
And that all but confirmed it. Definitely not a coincidence.
“You look similar, is all,” she deflected, trying to keep her tone lighthearted. Luckily they seemed to buy it, both the deflection and her own mental turmoil.
“Well, I think right now a few explanations are in order. From all of us.” Johanna’s dad said. “As thanks for keeping our daughter safe, why don’t the two of you walk with us, we can try to explain what happened.”
That sounded good, actually. Especially if she could get an explanation as to why her Mum looked barely ten.
The four of them walked out of the cave away from the cabin. As they walked, the Mother and the Father told the story of the sickness that inflicted Hilda’s Mum as an infant, one the doctors could do nothing about. They told of the deal they made, and how they tried to avoid it affecting Johanna at all growing up. And they told of how they tried to hide it, to prevent Johanna from feeling guilty.
Hilda found the story enrapturing. It explained why Hilda had never met her own grandparents before, something that had never worried her, but it was something she had wondered about on occasion.
“I… guess I understand why you didn’t tell me you were leaving, even if I still don’t like it, but why did you avoid me once I got here?” Johanna asked, once the story was finished. “Why leave me to wander on my own? I know you were watching us.”
“Well, we had hoped that the two of you would find a way out on your own,” Johanna’s Mother replied. “You see, there was a reason we tried to avoid contact.”
“Now our goodbye is going to be even more difficult,” her Father continued. Johanna blinked in surprise.
“Goodbye? What do you mean?” she asked, her voice starting to tremble.
Johanna’s Father sighed. “You don’t belong here,” he said, trying to sound reassuring. Johanna clearly wasn’t buying it. “Neither of you two do.”
“But… I just found you,” Johanna cried. “I don’t want to lose you again. Why do I have to leave?”
That struck Hilda. Realistically, why shouldn’t her Mum stay here with her parents? Here, she would have everything. Her parents, the childhood she had missed out on, magic.
Was this the end of her journey? Did she have to go home empty handed? It almost seemed as though Mum would be happier here.
“This place isn’t quite real. Not in the way you are used to,” Johanna’s Mother continued. “We see everything through the eyes of what the Island thinks we want to see. Nothing has changed for us since we came here permanently.”
“And by keeping you here, we would consign you to the same fate,” the Father added. “If you stayed here, then this would be it. Nothing would ever be new for you.”
“But how could that possibly be bad, if we get to stay together.” Johanna was full-on crying now, her parents not far behind her on that front.
The Mother knelt down in front of her. “We’ve made our peace with the situation, but you… you have the spirit of an adventurer. You wouldn’t be happy here, of that we are certain.”
“We thought, perhaps, that it would be easier for you not to know. Unfortunately, that door has closed for us now.”
“How can you say that!” Johanna shouted.
They sighed. “We have many regrets. Perhaps you are right to shout at us, but much of this was out of our hands. There is one outcome now where you can be truly happy, and that is as far away from this place as possible.”
“We’re sorry things had to be this way,” a new voice jumped in. Hilda turned. It was Astrid, floating down from the mushroom canopy.
“Astrid?” Johanna’s dad asked.
“Hello, brother. You certainly made yourselves hard to find. Couldn’t you have stayed in one place?”
He sighed. “You know we couldn’t. We didn’t want to attract too much of the attention of the island.”
“Right. The life claim. I’ll handle that if the two of you help the children escape.”
The Father’s brow furrowed. “Astrid, are you sure? You know how risky that would be.”
“I’m sure,” Astrid said resolutely. “Besides, we have no choice. We have run out of time. Look,” she pointed. There, in the distance, a brilliant aurora was taking form.
Johanna and her parents looked confused, but to Hilda the sight was a welcome one.
“The deerfox!” Hilda exclaimed. “They’re our ticket out of here!”
“Oh dear. I thought we would have longer,” Johanna’s Mother said, trepidation clear in her tone.
“I know we were the ones to suggest it, but suddenly I'm not too certain,” the Father mused.
A moment passed. Then, almost simultaneously, the parents’ expressions hardened. “Alright, time to get you two out of here,” the Mother said.
“We will escort you to your deerfox, but I’m afraid we can accompany you no further.”
They had barely taken a couple steps toward the aurora before the floor crumbled in front of them. Hilda, who had been breaking out into a run, was the closest to the ravine. Caught off guard, she almost fell into the depths before a small hand gripped hers, helping pull her back.
“Phew. Thanks M-... thanks for the save,” Hilda said.
“We figured something like this would happen,” the Mother said. “Though I didn’t think it would be this violent.”
Johanna glanced at her parents questioningly. “I’m afraid the island doesn’t want you to leave,” they explained.
“Here, take our hands.”
Johanna’s parents surrounded them, each taking one of their free hands. An odd sensation surrounded her, making her feel light and untethered. Her feet left the ground and the four of them began to glide through the sky.
The magic felt… strange. It surrounded her, flowing across her body from where she gripped the Mother’s hand. She felt as though at any moment, even if she let go, she could simply drift away. It was not a very pleasant feeling. She kept a tight grip on her Mum’s hand, even tighter than the hand that was currently keeping her suspended.
Flying was much faster than running, so in no time at all they were landing right in front of where the Deerfox trail touched the ground. Running to meet them in front of the pack was a particularly familiar deerfox.
“Twig!” Hilda cried, running to give him a hug. For a moment, there was nothing but the warmth of her deerfox. But she was quickly reminded of their situation as the ground started to tremble.
“You need to hurry,” Johanna’s Mum was saying. “Those horrid eyes are stirring.” And indeed, those mushroom creatures from earlier were beginning to surface in an attempt to stop them.
Hilda hopped on one of the adult deerfox’s back. If her memory served, this one was Twig’s father. She pulled her Mum up to ride behind her.
“Johanna,” the Father said, “you’ll always be our little girl to us. But there’s so much more to you. Remember that.”
“We love you, don’t ever forget that,” the Mother said.
“Hilda,” Johanna’s Father started. She startled, not expecting the sudden address. “Take care of Johanna, alright? And Johanna, keep an eye on this one for us.”
“Just… please take care of each other as best you can,” the Mother continued.
Hilda gave what she hoped was a reassuring smile. “I’ll do my best.”
Johanna buried her face into Hilda’s back, quiet sobs wracking her frame.
“Don’t let go,” she told her Mum. She couldn’t think of anything else to say.
As the Deerfox began to trot up into the aurora, Hilda looked back at her Mum’s parents. They had a forlorn expression as they watched them go. Hilda was sad, somewhat, even though she had met them not even an hour ago. They were her grandparents, even if they were her Mum’s parents first. Mum would probably be more broken about this.
Her Mum held her in an iron grip as they crossed through the Deerfox domain. Hilda couldn’t help but look around in wonder, but her Mum kept her face pressed against Hilda’s back. Hilda rubbed the arms wrapped around her torso in what she hoped came across as a comforting gesture.
Despite everything, she couldn’t help but feel a rush of excitement flooding through her body. They were almost free!
---
Down in the depths of the Fairy Island, Astrid approached the great fairy. Johanna could leave, but the magic of the Island remained within her. And because of that, she would never be truly safe. Not unless Astrid did something about it.
“I request that you switch your life claim from Johanna to myself,” she started. She did not let her voice waver. Any perceived weakness might jeopardize the encounter.
“Hm. A trade,” the great fairy considered. Astrid couldn’t rely on simple consideration, though.
“Actually, I demand it.”
For a moment, Astrid thought she had cowed the great fairy. She was quickly proven otherwise as the fairy let out a horrid, unworldly shriek and rushed her.
“Your request is denied. Your demand is greatly unappreciated.”
The great fairy took a moment to compose itself, before continuing as if nothing had happened.
“A claim is a claim. It’s the way of things for our bargains to be upheld. You have nothing to bargain with.”
“I have one thing. My life.” Astrid said. The great fairy paused. “A willing blood sacrifice, the oldest of all bargaining chips. You can’t deny your desire for that.”
The great fairy inclined its head, in what Astrid hoped was consideration.
“You are right, I cannot.”
The figure reached out towards her with a decrepit, rotting hand. Astrid closed her eyes. She knew, ever since she had suggested that cursed bargain, that the child was living on borrowed time. She might not have been the greatest aunt, or the greatest sister. But in this she could finally pay the debt. She was ready to die.
“But…” The fairy rasped, “I do not take kindly to your demands. I do not intend to let my investment on the child go unpaid. I believe I am owed… interest.”
“Anything. Anything for her.”
“Oh no, you misunderstand. Not from you, you have nothing left to give.”
The bottom dropped out of Astrid’s stomach. The rotten hand crept closer, uncaring.
“The child has been living on borrowed time ever since she was stolen from me. And I intend to collect.”
---
The two of them leapt down onto solid earth.
“Uh… thank you, Twig’s parents, for helping to rescue us,” Hilda said, giving slight bow to the deerfox. She wasn’t quite sure of the protocol, but she wanted Twig’s parents to like her.
The deerfox inclined their heads briefly before leaving back into the aurora. Hilda watched them go in wonder. The sight was just as beautiful the second time.
A sudden, hacking cough caught her attention. Hilda’s thoughts were immediately brought back to her own Mum.
Two things were immediately apparent. The first being that her Mum was still a child. She had figured, once her Mum’s identity had been revealed, that her Mum being a kid was some weird fairy magic, and as such she would go back to normal once they left. She hadn’t thought about it when they traveled through the deerfox domain, but she probably would have noticed if the arms gripping her torso doubled in length. That they hadn’t meant there wasn’t anything reminding her of her hypothesis. Now, though, it was apparent that her Mum wasn’t changing back into the adult she was familiar with.
The second thing was arguably much more pressing, more so than the fact that her Mum was still a child. And that was how her mum was a sickly-looking child.
Panic immediately gripped Hilda. She hadn’t seen it first-hand, but the description of the sickness that had plagued her Mum as an infant was still fresh in her mind. And given that they had just escaped the Fairy Island, a Fairy Island that had actively tried to prevent them from leaving in multiple ways, the connection was obvious. But what could she do?
“Hilda. Hilda, it hurts,” her Mum whined, a cold sweat breaking out on her forehead. Hilda instinctively gripped her Mum’s hand. Her hand was cold and clammy.
“Please hold on,” Hilda begged. “I can’t… I can’t lose you again.”
She desperately tried to think of anything she could do. But she wasn’t anything that could help. She wasn’t a witch, she wasn’t a doctor. She was just Hilda, the adventurer, but right now that wasn’t enough.
After a few incredibly tense minutes consisting of nothing but her Mum’s labored breathing and Hilda’s racing thoughts, the color finally returned to her Mum’s complexion.
Auntie Astrid must have done it! She gave her Mum the biggest hug she could. A moment later though, and she realized what that meant. Astrid had to stay in the Fairy Kingdom. Or… worse.
So that was Astrid gone. And her grandparents were stuck in the Fairy Kingdom, too. As she gripped her Mum tighter, the fact that her Mum was still a child could no longer be ignored. She wasn’t even sure if her Mum remembered she had a daughter, so the Mum she knew, the Mum she relied on was gone as well. What could she even do now?
Her Mum returned the hug, gripping somehow even tighter. Hilda took comfort in that as tears began to leak out of the corner of her eyes.
“There she is!” She heard voices coming from across the clearing, though she barely processed them, still holding tight to her Mum.
“Hilda!”
David and Frida ran over to her. She barely noticed. Her head felt oddly fuzzy, it was hard to focus on anything besides the burning desire to keep her Mum close.
“Hilda! You’re back! Did you find your Mum? And who’s this?”
And what was she supposed to say to that?
Chapter 2
Summary:
Hilda isn't sure of what to do quite yet but one thing is clear. They cannot stay in Tofoten.
Hilda, Johanna, David, and Frida make their way back to Trolberg.
Notes:
(See the end of the chapter for notes.)
Chapter Text
“Hilda? Hilda, what’s wrong?”
“Say something!”
Hilda’s mind felt out of phase, the words seemed to slide right through her brain. Hilda didn’t respond to their words. Couldn’t, even. She felt paralyzed, almost, the only muscles she could move being those which held on to her Mum, and she wasn’t willing to let her go.
A hand on her shoulder broke the spell she was under. She turned to look at its owner. Frida was there, her expression an odd mix of relief and confusion.
“I’m… I’m fine you guys,” Hilda started. “Physically at least. Sorry… it’s just a lot right now.”
“I’d imagine,” David said. “Did you find-”
“Yeah.” Hilda interrupted. “I found what I was looking for.” Hilda didn’t blame them for not recognizing her Mum, not after how long her own daughter didn’t. She inclined her head towards Johanna in explanation.
Frida connected the dots first. “That’s your-” Hilda’s eyes widened and her arm twitched in an aborted gesture. Frida thankfully caught on and stopped herself from continuing. Hilda didn’t quite want to break the news to her Mum yet. She seemed overwhelmed enough for the time being.
“I’m still confused,” David said. “What’s going on?”
Frida whispered in David’s ear. He blinked, then shrugged after a momentary pause.
“Stranger things have happened. So, are we going to get an explanation?” David asked.
“I don’t think we need that right now. Look at the state they’re in,” Frida interjected before Hilda could respond. Hilda couldn’t even bring herself to feel offended. “It’s probably just some weird fairy thing anyways. Why don’t we just head back to Astrid’s house and go from there?”
Hilda had to bite back tears at the reminder. “Yeah, that sounds good. Johanna?”
“Yeah?” Her Mum answered. Hilda’s heart somehow shattered even more. She sounded so broken.
“Why don’t we go head inside. We’ve got a nice house we can get settled in for the time being. Does that sound good?”
Hilda hoped she was sounding reassuring. She’d never had to comfort a child before. She was an only child, meaning no younger siblings, and most of the people she talked to regularly were older than her. In fact, she couldn’t remember ever interacting substantially with anybody younger than her. That hadn’t seemed like an issue before, but now suddenly she was caught off guard.
With no prior experience to fall back on, she was stuck trying to emulate how Mum would talk to her when she was younger, but she could already tell she would be considerably worse at returning the favor.
Johanna sniffed. “That’s fine, I guess,” she replied. Hilda sighed in relief. It looked like she wasn’t messing up too badly.
Johanna wavered slightly as she stood up, almost losing her balance. Hilda instinctively moved to steady her. Following another quick check to make sure that Mum was okay, the four of them set off to Astrid’s house.
The walk was largely quiet, Johanna still a little woozy from the sickness she had been briefly reminded of. Hilda kept an eye on Johanna’s unsteady steps as they set off, but luckily it looked like any uncertainty was quickly being overcome. Soon enough, Johanna had no trouble keeping pace with them on her own.
“Oh yeah,” Frida started as they reached the front door. “Astrid followed you into Fairy Country. Did you happen to see her in there?”
Astrid herself had said what she was doing was dangerous. That she hadn’t followed them out was quite telling. “Yeah.” Hilda said. “But she…” her voice died out. Her vocal cords seemed unwilling to continue functioning.
“Oh. I’m so sorry”
In lieu of responding, Hilda opened the door. The house was silent. She had hoped, even if it was futile, that Astrid would be there, like nothing ever happened. But while the house did have signs of life, they were undoubtedly the result of David and Frida, who must have been stuck there. As if her guilt wasn’t bad enough, Hilda now was reminded about how she left them outside, alone, for so long.
“Uh… excuse me,” a voice asked. They turned around, startled. The Pookah was there. “Could you ask if I can borrow a wooden mallet?”
“I’m sorry,” Frida started in a solemn tone, “I don’t think Astrid’s going to be in much anymore.”
“Oh. Well,” the pookah shuffled nervously. “I’ll just come back later, I think.”
Before any of them could respond, the Pookah took off running. Perhaps they should have followed, or better reassured the creature. But right now, they were all just… tired.
As soon as they went inside, both Johanna and Hilda immediately collapsed on the couch. She heard the footsteps of David and Frida walking into the kitchen, but she was focused more on her Mum.
She tried to say something, to make her Mum feel better, but she had trouble thinking of what to say. Johanna had lost her parents completely, which was objectively worse than what Hilda was experiencing. Hilda at least had her Mum with her, even if she was a bit different. Then why was Hilda struggling so much?
As the minutes went by, Hilda felt herself rapidly approaching her breaking point. But she had to keep it together in front of her Mum. Trying to reconcile the two warring emotions caused a third desire to become overwhelming, the desire to escape. Everything was too much, she had to leave.
“Alright. I’ve got to… go to the bathroom. David, Frida, can you keep an eye on Johanna for a second?”
David and Frida looked fine with it, but Johanna was clearly a bit panicked. She gripped Hilda’s hand tighter. Did she not remember them?
Hilda put her other hand over Johanna’s. “Don’t worry M- Johanna. I’m not leaving you.” Lie. She totally was, even if only for a moment. “I’ll be back, I promise. I just really need to use the restroom, and I don’t think you want to see that.”
Johanna didn’t laugh, but she did give a small smile. Hilda counted that as a win.
“David and Frida are really nice, don’t worry. I wouldn’t leave you alone with anybody I didn’t trust.”
Hilda gently let go of her Mum’s hand. For a moment, it felt like Johanna would refuse to let go, but eventually she acquiesced.
Hilda did not run to the bathroom, but her steps were noticeably heavy. Her vision swam a bit as she entered the bathroom and closed the door.
She slumped down against the back of the door. There was a brief moment of silence before Hilda completely broke down. Her aunt was gone, her grandparents were gone, even if she only got to talk with them for not even an hour, and her Mum wasn’t quite even her Mum anymore. And the worst thing, the thing that was really breaking her down, was that this, all of this, was entirely her fault.
---
Frida watched Hilda go. She suspected that Hilda was not entirely truthful when she said she was going to the bathroom. Hilda was hiding it well, but Frida could tell that she was close to a breakdown. Not that Frida could blame her. Frida didn’t know exactly what happened inside the fairy mound, but it was trivial to deduce that it must have been awful to her.
Though it seems it hadn’t treated Johanna well either. Frida looked over at where Johanna was sitting on the couch. She was absently flipping through the channels on the television, but it didn’t look like she was particularly focused on the screen.
David had joined Johanna on the couch just after Hilda got up. If he was bothered by Johanna going through the television channels he wasn’t showing it. Actually, he was probably the one who put the television on, likely to serve as a distraction. He, too, was looking a little worn down. Frida imagined that she herself wasn’t looking too great at the moment either.
Frida made the decision that Hilda probably needed support now more. David would be fine keeping an eye on Johanna for the time being.
She didn’t make an effort to hide her footsteps as she walked to the bathroom.
Frida could hear the sounds of heavy breathing behind the bathroom door. A second later, muffled sobs came through as well. Frida’s heart throbbed at the sound. She didn’t have the whole picture about what happened in the fairy mound, but the pieces she had put together so far made an unpleasant picture. Hilda probably needed some time to process what she was going through.
But that didn’t mean she had to do it alone.
Frida raised her hand to knock on the door. She allowed herself to hesitate for only a second, before steeling herself and knocking quietly. Immediately, the sounds from the other side went silent.
After a few seconds with no response, Frida knocked again.
“Hilda,” she said, trying to make her voice sound as reassuring as possible. “I know you’re in there. Do you want me to open the door?”
Hilda didn’t respond immediately, but after a moment, Frida heard a soft shuffling from the other side of the bathroom door. The door shifted inward, just a few millimeters, suggesting that a body that had been leaning on the door had moved, allowing her entry. Frida figured that was permission enough, considering it didn’t seem like Hilda was up for talking much.
Frida gingerly cracked the door open, barely a centimeter at first. When she didn’t hear any audible objection, she opened the door the rest of the way.
There Hilda was, sitting on the floor facing away from the door, hugging her legs and resting her head on her knees. Frida couldn’t imagine sitting like that was particularly uncomfortable. As she walked in, Hilda turned to look over her shoulder at her, allowing Frida to catch sight of the tears streaming down her face. Frida couldn’t help her expression as she caught sight of her broken features.
Hilda didn’t make eye contact for long, burying her head in her legs again, whether out of shame or something else Frida couldn’t tell. Frida wasn’t off put, however, kneeling down behind Hilda’s shivering frame and wrapping her arms around her. Hilda’s breath stuttered at the contact.
Hilda didn’t seem to be up for talking right now, but that was perfectly fine. If anything, that just allowed Frida the time to figure out what to say. “Hilda, I know things are looking bad right now, but we’re here to help you figure everything out. You’re not alone. I- we care about you, you know? I can’t think of anything that would make us abandon you.”
Frida kept her arms around Hilda even as quiet sobs shook her frame. They stayed like that for a while, both of them relaxing into each other’s touch.
Eventually, though, Frida’s knees made their displeasure with their position known. Quite intently. Luckily, Hilda’s breath seemed to have evened out by now, and she was gingerly wiping away her tears.
“Feeling better?” Frida asked.
Hilda gave a small smile. Not quite up to her normal standards, but a smile nonetheless. “Yeah. Thank you.”
---
Hilda couldn’t say for sure that she was okay now, but at the very least she wasn’t feeling ready to break down anymore.
She followed Frida back to the living room. Mum was there, on the couch, right where Hilda left her. Luckily, it looked like David had introduced her to the television. She seemed, while not engaged per se, at least distracted by the screen. Though that wasn’t for long; as soon as Hilda walked in, her Mum glanced over at her. Immediately, she ran over to give a hug.
“Aw, Johanna, was David that boring?” Hilda asked
Johanna giggled lightly as David scoffed in mock indignation. Hilda smiled. She was grateful Johanna could still laugh at all.
“Alright, now that everyone’s feeling better, we’ve got to discuss what we’re going to do now.” Frida started, catching everyone’s attention, “I’ll just say it outright. David and I are expected back home in Trolberg tonight. We could theoretically stay here, but we’re already in a bit of trouble after staying the night in Tofoten yesterday while you two… you know.”
“Yeah, we had to phone our parents last night,” David continued. “They were… less than happy, to say the least. I really don’t want to push things by staying another night.”
As if the guilt hadn’t been bad enough already, Hilda thought. She hadn’t even thought about what it meant for them to spend the night waiting for her.
“Not that we minded,” Frida added hastily. She must have noticed Hilda’s expression. “But things will be… easier if we head back to Trolberg tonight. The question is, Johanna, are you willing to head to Trolberg with us?” Frida asked.
“I’m staying with Hilda,” Johanna replied. There was no hesitation.
“Well! That settles that, unless you want to stay here for a while, Hilda?”
The tone was clearly in jest, but Hilda couldn’t help but consider it, if only for a moment. Hilda looked around at the house. With Astrid gone, then by leaving they would be leaving the house abandoned. But Frida and David did have to go back to Trolberg, and Hilda couldn’t imagine splitting up. And more than anything right now, she just wanted to go home.
“No, we’re not splitting up,” Hilda declared. “We’re going to Trolberg.”
“Great, that’s settled!” Frida said. “Now, from what I remember, the train to Trolberg should be arriving in the next two hours or so, so I think we’ll want to start preparing to head out.”
Before they left, the four of them, half out of habit, half out of respect, cleaned up the house and locked up as they left. Hilda was a bit sad that they were abandoning the house, but what could they do? This wasn’t their home.
The walk to the station was done largely in silence. Hilda wasn’t quite sure what the others were thinking, but Hilda was simply looking forward to boarding the train. There, she would have four hours of travel where the decision of where they would go and how would be no longer in her hands. Hands which were being increasingly overwhelmed by the responsibilities that she had to carry. It would be one less thing to worry about. And she really needed that right now.
“We may have a problem,” David said. Speaking of worries, Hilda thought. “When we came here, we bought three return tickets. Now there are four of us. This presents a slight issue.”
“Hm. And Tofoten is too far out and small to merit having a dedicated ticketing staff, I’d imagine,” Frida added. “You know, I don’t actually know how people buy tickets out here. Surely there’s somewhere? The post office maybe?”
This kind of problem bothered Hilda the most, because this was a problem that would be a lot easier to solve if one of them was an adult. Unfortunately, Johanna certainly wasn’t forthcoming with any information.
They eventually decided to just risk it. They had spare money if the ticket person came through, they could say that Johanna lost her ticket and offer to pay there. They were young enough that they probably would take pity on them. Hopefully.
Thankfully, they had no issues boarding the train. As a bonus, they managed to find an empty car. Dealing with strangers was not something Hilda imagined Johanna wanted to deal with.
The four of them settled in, getting comfortable as the train pulled out of the station. Johanna wasted no time sitting down and looking out the window. Hilda felt herself relax at the sight. They probably did need to discuss the more… sensitive aspects of Johanna’s condition sometime soon, but Hilda didn’t want things to be more complicated for her than necessary.
The silence was broken when Johanna got up. “I’ve got to use the bathroom,” Johanna said. Well, then. That was perfect timing.
Johanna paused at the door, looking back at Hilda. Unsure of what Johanna was expecting, Hilda gave a thumbs up. It wasn’t like Johanna needed Hilda’s permission to leave. Maybe it was a comfort thing. Hilda didn’t know enough to say. Luckily, it seemed like that was the right thing to do, because Johanna gave a small smile and left the car.
As soon as Johanna had closed the door, David spoke up.
“Alright, if nobody else is going to ask it, I will. Why is your Mum a kid? She’s like ten at most. It’s kind of weird.”
Hilda frowned. “I don’t know. She was like that when I first caught up to her on the Fairy Island,” Hilda explained. “I didn’t even recognize her for a while, because why would my Mum be a child? I was thinking it’s some kind of illusion magic, trying to keep her naïve and more willing to stay, but if it is it didn’t wear off when we left.”
“Well, I haven’t read anything about Fairy Magic yet, so I can’t say anything on the matter,” Frida said. “But I’m sure we could go to Kaisa and Tildy for help. They’ll probably be able to figure something out.”
“I’m sure they’ll find something,” David agreed. “Though, are we going to tell Johanna that she’s supposed to be, like, old?”
“David! She’s not old! Don’t be rude,” Hilda reprimanded. “She… wasn’t old.” She frowned.
“Well, I’m going to agree with what Hilda’s done so far. I don’t think we should tell her, at least right now. That would do nothing but overwhelm her, and she’s probably already really stressed. But I do think we should try and see how her memory is. It’s remarkably difficult to remove memories completely, so it’s more than likely there’s something there. Plus we’ll want to have as much information as possible so that Kaisa and Tildy can make a proper diagnosis.”
“I wouldn’t worry about it too much,” David added. “Johanna seems pretty attached to you, Hilda, considering at that age she couldn’t have known you.”
That, at the very least, was something that remained constant, for which Hilda was incredibly grateful for. She couldn’t imagine how she would handle things if her Mum treated her like a stranger.
Her thoughts were interrupted by the train door opening again.
“Johanna! Did you have any trouble finding the bathroom?” She asked. Only after she said it did she realize that might have been embarrassing to ask.
“No,” Johanna responded, thankfully not indignantly, walking straight towards Hilda and sitting down next to her.
Frida blinked consideringly. “Have you ever ridden a train before, Johanna?” Frida asked, her tone mildly probing, though Hilda could only tell from how long they had been friends. Johanna wouldn’t be too suspicious of questions like these. Hilda hoped that was the case, at least.
“I…” A pause. “I don’t think so?” Johanna responded. She sounded strangely unsure.
“Well you’re doing just fine for your first time,” Frida said, giving Hilda a knowing look.
Living in a cabin in the wilderness meant Johanna probably wouldn’t have ridden a train until she was older. But, Johanna was much more comfortable navigating both the station and the train itself than someone truly unfamiliar would be.
That, at least, was some good news. And Hilda would take whatever she could get at the moment.
Once they arrived at the Trolberg station they wasted no time heading back to Hilda’s house. If Johanna’s proficiency with navigating the train wasn’t telling enough, she also had no difficulty navigating the city. She looked unbothered by the noises and the cars, which was more than Hilda could say for her first time in Trolberg. She instinctively kept to the sidewalks, which was relieving. It wasn’t rush hour, but the evening traffic meant they couldn’t just cross the roads whenever, and Hilda’s heart probably couldn’t handle her Mum running into traffic.
The walk was also thankfully uneventful, or at least it was until they rounded the corner to her apartment. There was something important conspicuously missing from outside her apartment.
“Where’s the car?” Hilda asked. “Did Mum… drive to Tofoten?”
“She must have, considering the trains only run so often. But it wasn’t at Astrid’s house. We may need to get it at some point.”
“How?” David asked. “None of us can drive.”
“We’ll figure it out later,” Frida said, eying Hilda and Johanna. “It’s not a priority right now.”
“Yeah, getting you guys settled in is more important,” David agreed.
And with that, they headed inside.
Walking through her front door was a relief for Hilda, like it usually was after a long adventure. The only thing that could make things better would be if her Mum was there to greet her. Thinking of that made what little relief she felt dry up unceremoniously. Because her Mum was here, but not in the form she found comfort in. The house was disheveled, too, as though it had been hastily abandoned. Which it probably had been. That only made Hilda feel worse.
Frida started talking as David headed to the kitchen.
“Why don’t the two of you go lie down on the couch,” Frida said. “We’ll take care of things for a while, we don’t mind”
“But-”
“Really, we don’t,” David interrupted from the kitchen. “You two have had a rough enough time of it.” From the sounds of it he was making dinner.
Hilda still felt a little guilty, though by now that was certainly not an unfamiliar emotion. Regardless, she was grateful for her friends’ help. “Thanks, guys,” she said.
Frida went to join David in the kitchen. In the meantime, Hilda turned her attention towards Johanna. She was staring at the ceiling, now, and Hilda couldn’t get a solid read on her expression. She didn’t look too uncomfortable, for which Hilda was grateful, but Hilda would have been suspicious if she was comfortable after everything that had happened to them.
“Hey, uh, Johanna? How are you holding up?” Hilda asked. She really needed to learn how to comfort a child.
“Fine.” Johanna said. Hilda suspected that she wasn’t entirely fine, but she didn’t want to press. Luckily, a small voice provided a convenient escape for both of them.
“Hilda! You’re back!” The familiar voice cried. Hilda’s heat leapt. That was Alfur! He was standing on the arm of the couch next to them, a relieved expression on his tiny features. She had almost forgotten that this house wasn’t empty.
Johanna, though, startled harshly at the new voice. She immediately focused on Alfur’s form, though when she caught sight of Hilda’s grin she relaxed. Alfur, too, startled when Johanna’s eyes focused directly on him.
“You can see me? That’s new. Hilda, do you know who signed her paperwork? I didn’t think there were other elves in Trolberg that liked paperwork. No offense to the Lost Clan, of course.”
“Wait. Alfur, you greeted me not knowing if she could see you?”
“Well, I figured if you were comfortable enough to let a friend into your home that she wouldn’t be too surprised by a little magic. But you’re dodging the question.”
She was. She really should just go out and say it. “Alfur, this is Johanna.”
Alfur blinked. Opened his mouth to say something. Blinked again. Closed his mouth. Another blink. Hilda could practically hear the gears in his brain spinning. And that was saying something, since those gears must be really small.
“I… Alright, I have a lot of questions, but those can be answered later. But it does look like we’ve got our work cut out for us.”
“We’re planning on heading to the library later, actually. Though we’re planning on checking in with Frida’s teachers, so you might be out of your depth.”
“That’s a great idea. Ask to borrow a couple books on fairy magic and I’ll look through them here when I have spare time.”
Alfur’s words helped reassure her. Even with Frida and David there to help her, she had almost forgotten that she wasn’t alone.
It felt like no time at all had passed before dinner was ready. David had prepared pancakes, it looked like. Johanna had volunteered to carry Alfur over to the table. He had protested slightly, saying that he could go himself, but Johanna had looked so eager, and Alfur didn’t have it in him to deny her. Johanna had an incredibly focused expression on her face as she gently carried Alfur over to the table. Hilda couldn’t help the warm expression on her face as she watched them go.
Dinner was… nice, despite everything. They were mostly silent, engaged as they were with the food in front of them, but with all of her friends around her, this quiet was more relaxing. Hilda hadn’t really realized how hungry she was, but it wasn’t too surprising. She hadn’t exactly eaten while they were in the Fairy Isle, but now that there was good food in front of her, that hunger made itself incredibly well known. Johanna, too, looked like she would be more than willing to consume a significant fraction of her body weight in pancakes if such a thing were physically possible.
David was the best friend ever for making this. The way to a girl’s heart was through her stomach, indeed.
Once everyone had finished eating, or, more accurately, once they had eaten the last of the pancakes, they slowly started getting up and cleaning.
Frida sighed. “Alright, I don’t like it, but we’re already in hot water with our parents from staying in Tofoten yesterday, so we really do have to head home.”
“Don’t worry!” David said, reassuringly. “We’ll be back tomorrow morning as soon as possible to help you guys figure this out.”
“Thanks, you guys!”
With David and Frida gone, the house was quiet. Now, Hilda was unsure of what to do. They had plans for tomorrow, sure, but she had no idea what to do with Johanna now. She tried to think. What would Johanna want right now?
Hilda’s thoughts were interrupted as Johanna yawned. It made sense. Now that they had eaten, her weariness was getting more and more difficult to ignore, and Johanna was younger than her. That at least gave Hilda an idea.
“Hey, Johanna, why don’t I show you where you’ll sleep?”
Hilda led the two of them to her Mum’s bedroom. Though she didn’t hesitate opening the door for her, it was still a bit odd, being in her Mum’s bedroom like this. The room always felt off-limits, though she had never been banned from entering.
Johanna hadn’t even bothered changing out of her clothes, merely taking off her hooded cloak and laying it at the foot of the bed before climbing under the covers. Hilda had the slightest thought that maybe she should have insisted Johanna change, or insist that they should brush their teeth, but frankly Johanna had dealt with enough right now.
“Hilda, this bed is too big,” Johanna whined, grinning.
It was. The bed was built for an adult, but Johanna as she was now barely took up any of it. While Johanna’s tone had been playful, the words struck Hilda hard nonetheless. Her eyes watered for a moment, but she held them back. She didn’t want to make her Mum any more uncomfortable than she was already.
Hilda was ready to leave, silently stepping away from the bed and was about to bid goodnight before a small voice interrupted her.
“Um… Hilda? Could you stay for a while?”
Her Mum sounded so vulnerable. How could she say no? “Of course,” Hilda reassured. “I’ll stay as long as you’d like me to.”
Hilda sat on the bed next to her Mum. With Hilda there, Johanna seemed much more comfortable falling asleep. Within fifteen minutes, she was completely out.
It was a little weird, being in the same bed as her Mum. They hadn’t done that since back when they lived in the wilderness, and even then, it wasn’t like Hilda had nightmares very often as a child. Though this time the circumstances were reversed.
Hilda looked at her Mum’s, no, Johanna’s sleeping form. A whirlwind of indecipherable emotions pulsed inside of her. In sleep, Johanna’s face was much more relaxed, making her look every bit the child her Mum had turned into. Hilda felt a surge of protectiveness; she wanted to make sure this child was safe and happy. It was almost overwhelming, and Hilda had known her Mum like this for only a day. Was this what her Mum felt, when she looked at her?
Such thoughts would be difficult enough to analyze fully awake, and Hilda was finding it difficult to keep her eyes open listening to Johanna’s soft breathing. Maybe she could just… close her eyes for a bit.
When she slept, she did not dream.
Notes:
It looks like I might be able to maintain a weekly upload schedule, which is pretty cool! I beat the video game I play so I've found myself with a bit more time on my hands.
I was also looking forward to writing this chapter the least, so hopefully the quality will improve from here on out. Also the tone of the subject matter, too, I promise things get better for them.
Chapter 3
Summary:
Hilda takes Johanna to Kaisa to get an authority to weigh in on her condition.
Unfortunately, it doesn't look like everything can be fixed in a single afternoon.
Notes:
(See the end of the chapter for notes.)
Chapter Text
Hilda blinked awake. For a moment, she didn’t recognize where she was. This wasn’t her room. Another blink. No, this was Mum’s room. But why was she here? She only slept in her Mum’s bed when she had really bad nightmares, and she stopped doing that well before they moved to Trolberg. Another blink. The body next to her shifted slightly. Hilda glanced over. For a moment, she couldn’t comprehend who it was.
Everything rushed back to her then. The knowledge of how she had gotten to that point, along with all the sorrows that entailed.
She quietly got out of bed, leaving Johanna to rest. A quick trip to the bathroom to freshen up, and a change of clothes later, and Hilda was ready to greet the day.
Well, greet the early morning, more like. The sun hadn’t even begun to rise yet. She didn’t normally get up this early, but she did fall asleep early the previous night. The house was oddly quiet at this time. Normally, Mum was up well before she was, often either at her drawing table or making breakfast by the time Hilda was up and ready.
David and Frida said that they would come over as soon as possible, but they were in a bit of trouble with their parents, meaning they would probably take a few hours before being cleared to leave.
In the meantime, Hilda was hungry. Johanna probably would be as well, once she woke up. Hilda imagined she would appreciate waking up to a nice breakfast. Hilda certainly did.
It wasn’t everyday, but often times Mum would make breakfast for them. That thought gave her pause. Mum was Johanna now, a child younger than Hilda. She didn’t have a Mum to make breakfast anymore.
Only right now, Hilda quickly reminded herself. This probably wasn’t permanent. She was sure that when they went to Kaisa and Tildy that they would be able to fix this. Mum would probably find the whole situation funny, in retrospect. If she wasn’t too mad, at least.
But for now, Johanna was a child, and in the meantime, Hilda could make breakfast for her Mum.
Hilda could cook food for herself, of course. That was a life skill that her Mum had made sure she had learned, even back when they lived in the cabin. But cooking for another person felt… different. More meaningful, in a way. Hilda would be fine if the food didn’t quite turn out right, but she didn’t want her Mum to be disappointed.
First things first, Hilda had to actually decide what to make. That meant, before that actually, she had to look in the fridge. She didn’t know what food they had, since her Mum was the one who took care pf grocery shopping.
One of the first things she found in the fridge were some eggs. She could make eggs and toast, that didn’t seem too difficult. The question was, would Johanna like it? At the very least, her Mum being a child meant she would probably make her displeasure known instead of demurely smiling at her like the time Hilda had, at the age of barely six, tried to make cookies and nearly charred them. And forgot to add sugar. Certainly not one of Hilda’s finest moments.
She got out the frying pan and toaster and started preparing the food. Cooking helped take her mind off of her worries, the motions providing a convenient distraction from her more unsavory thoughts.
It felt like no time at all had passed before the food was just about ready, though this was a relatively easy meal to cook. She thought it turned out alright. She hadn’t burned anything and didn’t forget to add salt. She wasn’t a professional chef by any means but she was satisfied with her work.
Johanna must have woken up from either the sounds or the smell of her cooking, because she was sitting on the couch, turned to silently watch her work. Hilda almost startled when she caught sight of her, but managed to take her presence in stride. That made things easier for her, she didn’t have to leave the kitchen to wake her up.
“Hey, Johanna, how are you doing?” She asked. “I made breakfast if you’re up for it.”
Johanna said nothing, but she did make her way to the kitchen table to sit down. That reminded Hilda, she hadn’t set the table yet. She moved the eggs off the stove and went to get out plates for the two of them.
Hilda didn’t comment on Johanna’s silence. She figured she was just tired, perhaps only having just woken up. Or that’s what she thought, until Johanna’s eyes began to water as she slid some of the eggs off the frying pan and onto Johanna’s plate.
“Johanna? What’s wrong?” Hilda asked, slightly worried. Surely this wasn’t because of her cooking, was it?
“It just-” Johanna sniffed. “This reminds me of Mum and Dad.”
Hilda forgot, almost, that Johanna had lost her family as well. She felt almost selfish, that she was so worried about her Mum when she was still here, as opposed to Johanna who lost both of her parents forever. And this was only the day after it happened. It made sense that she would cry.
“I’m… sorry about them.” Hilda didn’t really know how to comfort her, but she tried her best. “But don’t worry, I’ll take care of you. I’ll help you through this- Through everything I can.”
“But why?” Johanna asked. “Why do you care?”
“Because you’re my-” Hilda paused, catching herself just in time. Her mind whirled, trying to find a replacement word, because she couldn’t just say ‘Mum,’ but Johanna deserved to know how important she was. “…sister.” Hilda eventually settled on. “And I’m not letting you go again.”
“You… you mean it?” Johanna asked.
“Of course.”
Johanna went in for a hug. Hilda hastily set down the frying pan she was holding to reciprocate. They held each other for a long while, Johanna breathing slowly losing its shakiness. “I don’t remember having a sister,” Johanna eventually said, like it was a confession. “But, I don’t remember a lot of things.”
“That makes sense. You did uh- hit your head back in the Fairy Isle.”
“Did I? I suppose I must have. Things are weirdly fuzzy between when I followed my parents in and when I met you. I do know that you’re important to me, even if I didn’t remember exactly how.”
Hilda felt relieved. That was the best she could hope for, given the circumstances. “You’re really important to me, too.”
A pause. Hilda eventually extricated herself from Johanna’s arms. Not because she didn’t deserve it, but because Hilda was pretty hungry.
“Alright, we don’t want the food getting cold. Do you want my world-renowned cooking to go to waste?” Johanna giggled at that, eagerly digging into the food in front of her. If the rate at which the eggs were disappearing meant anything, it seemed like she was enjoying the food.
“Oh yeah,” Hilda started, while the both of them ate. Johanna looked up, curiously. “Speaking of memory, after Frida and David come over we might take you somewhere to get you checked out, if you’re okay with that.”
Johanna nodded. “That’s fine. I like exploring. When are they coming over?”
Hilda didn’t show it, but she was definitely relieved that Johanna was willing to go out into the city. Hilda wouldn’t have been surprised if Johanna just wanted to stay in the house all day after what happened, but she would honestly prefer they get this sorted out as soon as possible.
“Probably in a couple hours,” she responded. She wished she had an exact time frame, but both David and Frida had mentioned having to run damage control to prevent being grounded for longer, which was understandable.
“Well, what are we doing until then?”
“Well, we’ve got to finish eating breakfast for one, but after that, I’m not actually sure, give me a second.”
The problem was unexpectedly difficult to figure out. She still had no ideas, from when they finished eating all the way to when Hilda had finished cleaning up. Certainly not for lack of trying, but she found her thoughts tending more towards just getting Johanna to Kaisa and Tildy.
She glanced over at Johanna as a last ditch effort for some idea. She was fiddling with her cloak a bit as she watched Hilda clean up. Blessedly, that gave Hilda an idea.
“How about we see if we can find you some clothes?” Hilda asked. “I can’t image you’ll be comfortable with only one set of clothes. We can go through some of my old clothes, and see if any fit you.”
Johanna nodded, then turned and ran ahead to Hilda’s room. By the time Hilda caught up, Johanna had already gotten the box of old clothes out of her closet. She was already certain that some of her Mum’s memories remained, but the reminder was still much appreciated.
Hilda herself hadn’t even touched her old clothes after she had outgrown them. Her Mum had been meaning to recycle the fabric at some point, but now Hilda was grateful that she hadn’t gotten around to it yet.
Hilda pulled out one of her old red sweaters. She held it up to Johanna’s frame, trying to judge the size. It looked like it would fit, which was lucky. She looked to be about the same size Hilda was, when they first moved to Trolberg. Which was good, because it wasn’t like they had a lot of extra clothes to work with. A lot of Hilda’s smaller clothes had been abandoned at the ruins of their old cabin.
“Well, these look your size. Do you see anything you like?”
Johanna nodded, grabbing the sweater. She looked eagerly through the bin of clothes, eventually retrieving one of Hilda’s old skirts.
“Well, go see if those fit you. You can change in the bathroom if that makes you more comfortable.”
Johanna said nothing, taking the clothes and heading to the bathroom.
In the resulting silence, Hilda found herself lost in thought. Every couple of years, her Mum would have her try on all the clothes she had and put away the ones that didn’t fit anymore. That was how the clothes had ended up in the box, after all. This wasn’t the exact same thing, Johanna was trying on the clothes to find some to wear, but the connection was close enough that Hilda was reminded regardless. It was, after all, the only time the box tended to leave the closet.
It just served as another thing her Mum did for her. It seemed like every hour there was a new thing Hilda found out about regarding taking care of a child. She had barely thought about these things growing up, but now that Hilda was the one responsible for a child, all these things were starting to pile up. And she was just taking care of her for a small while, before they got her Mum back to normal.
Hilda hoped she would be a better daughter after this was all over.
In no time at all, Johanna walked back into the room wearing the clothes she had picked. Hilda blinked a few times. She looked remarkably similar to Hilda, then, wearing one of her old sweaters and a blue skirt, a copy of Hilda’s favorite outfit from when she was that age. The hair was brown instead of teal, but otherwise she was practically a splitting image.
With the colorful hooded cloak, Johanna looked more at home on the fairy island, so much so that Hilda thought her to be some kind of fairy when they first met. But here, in Hilda’s clothes, the features were unmistakable. Hilda couldn’t possibly see her as anything other than her own mother.
“You look great, Johanna!” Hilda said.
“Thanks,” Johanna smiled. “But I think I prefer my cloak for now.” She gripped the cloak in her hands protectively. Hilda completely understood. The stitching looked hand-made, and there was no question who had made it for her.
“That’s fine, but it’s good to have extra clothes on hand for when you get dirty. And I do mean when, I know what you like to get up to.”
Johanna giggled. Hilda couldn’t help but laugh herself. They really were quite similar.
“Well, I’ve got some old shoes that I’ve grown out of, do you want to see if those fit you?”
The time seemed to fly by as they went through Hilda’s old clothes. Hilda was so absorbed that she startled when their doorbell rang. Funny, for all that she had been desperate for her friends, that she could, even if only temporary, forget about them.
Nonetheless, she ran to greet the two of them, grabbing both in a big hug as soon as they walked in the front door.
“Good to see you’re looking well, Hilda. What’s the status with your Mum? Any changes?” Frida asked.
Hilda shook her head. Frida frowned. “Figures. No harm in asking, I suppose.”
As they walked in, Frida spotted Johanna sitting on the couch. She was looking at them with curiosity, thankfully without any kind of suspicion. It looked like they had made a good impression yesterday.
“Oh, hi… Johanna. How are you doing?”
Johanna blinked. “Fine,” she said, somewhat quietly. It did seem like she was still a bit shy around people not named Hilda, though.
As Frida and David made their way inside, Johanna got up and gently pulled on Hilda’s sleeve. Hilda leaned in, and Johanna moved to whisper into her ear.
“Why do your friends look at me like that?” Johanna asked.
Hilda blinked. “Like what?”
“...Like they’re looking at someone else.”
Hilda didn’t quite know how to respond to that, at first. She couldn’t deny it, because it was true. Hilda was a bit grateful she herself wasn’t included in the question. She knew she often saw her Mum when she looked at Johanna, but Hilda tried her best to hide it, because Johanna didn’t need that kind of attention right now.
For the time being, Johanna needed Hilda to see her for who she was right now. And that was a scared, traumatized child who needed someone to be there for her.
She realized she hadn’t said anything for a little too long.
“...You remind them of somebody, probably,” she responded. It wasn’t untrue, but it wasn’t the whole truth either.
Johanna clearly didn’t fully buy it, but she accepted the deflection for what it was. Hilda didn’t like hiding the truth from her, and she was sure Johanna could tell that Hilda was hiding something, but for now it seemed they both decided that it wasn’t worth diving into for now, for which Hilda was grateful.
“Why don’t you go look through the bookshelf to see if you find anything you want to read?” Hilda said, changing the subject with the grace and subtlety of a full-grown troll. “I gotta talk with Frida and David real quick, but it’s going to be really dull and I don’t want you to get bored.” She gave an awkward smile.
Johanna still looked a bit skeptical, but acquiesced. She walked over to the bookshelf, scanning the titles and curiously pulling out a few. As she did that, Hilda walked over to the kitchen table to talk with Frida and David. Hilda wished they were just chatting, but unfortunately they really did need to figure out what they were going to do.
“Alright, what are we going to do today?” David started.
“Well, if your Mum is comfortable with it,” Frida gestured at Hilda, “we were planning on taking her to Kaisa and Tildy. Kaisa will be working at the library today, so we can just meet her there.”
“What about Tildy?” Hilda asked.
“I’m not sure. If she’s not with Kaisa at the library I’m sure Kaisa will talk to her, though.”
“Well, us going to Kaisa was all but guaranteed,” David said. “We didn’t need to distract your Mum for that. The real question is, how are you holding up, Hilda? With everything that’s going on?”
Hilda exhaled. “I don’t really know.” She gave it a thought. Everything was pretty difficult, and she didn’t have her Mum anymore. “It could be worse, I suppose. Things are weird now more than anything. It is difficult, because on one hand my Mum is perfectly safe, but on the other hand, she’s not the Mum I can normally rely on. I’m more concerned with her, actually, considering she lost both her parents. She’s the important one.”
“But you’re important too! There’s no competition for trauma, and even if there was, you’re still a teenager who all of a sudden has to take care of another child.”
“Maybe. But right now, she’s the one relying on me. And I’m not sure if I’m up to the task. Mum wasn’t perfect, but she was the best Mum someone like me could ask for. I don’t know if I’m even capable of being that for her in return.”
“Well, you’re still a kid. A teenager, yes, but still a kid. I’m sure you’re doing the best you can.”
“That’s the problem. I’m not sure my best is enough."
A pause. “Well, she looks like she’s doing just fine right now.” Indeed, if anything Johanna was looking a bit bored, flipping through some book she picked out much faster than if she was actually reading every word on the page.
“Well, then,” Frida said. “I suppose, unless anybody has anything else they want to say?” Neither of them responded. “Then there’s no reason to delay. Let’s get ready to go.”
“Hey, Johanna!” Hilda said, raising her voice enough to be heard across the room. “Did you find anything interesting?”
“Not really. I recognize a lot of these, and the ones I don’t are too complicated for me.” She frowned at the thick book she was holding. Hilda could barely decipher the title from how far she was away, but the width of the book left no question as to who it was meant for.
“Well that’s good, because we were planning on going to the library.”
Hilda had barely said the words before Johanna cut in. “I’m going with you,” she said, the words rushing out of her mouth.
“...that was the plan. Yes.”
Johanna visibly relaxed. Did she really think Hilda would just leave her alone? Actually, on second thought, such worries made complete sense. She had, from her perspective, only just barely begun to understand why her parents had to leave.
Johanna and Hilda both moved to get ready to leave. While Johanna was clearly uncomfortable parting with her hooded cloak, she clearly didn’t hold the same regard towards her other clothes. She slipped on a set of Hilda’s old boots that she had picked out earlier. Frida and David both thought it was adorable how they matched, but thankfully they restrained themselves from embarrassing her.
As they closed the door behind them, Hilda couldn’t help but feel excited. She’d finally be getting some answers, and frankly it would be nice to talk to an adult for once.
As soon as they walked through the front doors, Johanna was immediately enamored by the library, looking around in wonder. She looked a little too energetic for the quiet of the library, which worried Hilda a bit.
“Johanna, I know it’s exciting, but don’t run off!” She warned.
“She’s acting just like you, you know,” Frida mused.
“I know, and I hate it.”
They made their way up to Kaisa’s desk, where she was busy organizing a stack of books. She looked up, though, as they approached.
“Hello you three,” she said, then her eyes slid over to Johanna. “And your…” she fell silent. Johanna unconsciously moved slightly behind Hilda at her gaze. “Alright, let’s take this somewhere more private.”
Kaisa quickly led them to one of the library’s many employee rooms. Once she had closed the door, the frame shone briefly.
“Alright, we won’t be interrupted. What did you do?” she asked, inclining her head at Johanna’s comparatively small frame.
Hilda had trouble answering. She didn’t need the reminder that this whole thing was her fault. “Oh, this is serious,” Kaisa said, eyeing Hilda’s reaction. Her face softened. “I thought you just- never mind. What happened?”
Hilda tried her best to explain what happened on the Fairy Isle. It was hard, because a lot of it Hilda didn’t really know, either.
“She was like this when I found her in the Fairy Isle. I thought it was some fairy magic, but she didn’t turn back when we left.”
“And why were you in the Fairy Isle? Never mind, don’t answer that. I’m guessing you want me to take a look at her?” They nodded.
Kaisa had Johanna stand in the middle of the room while she slowly circled her, muttering under her breath. The tip of her wand seemed to flash through a multitude of colors, to the point where Hilda could no longer keep track if she wanted to. Johanna had looked tense at first, but Hilda had reassured her that Kaisa wouldn’t hurt her. She still seemed a little wary, but honestly that was about what Hilda expected.
Eventually, the muttering stopped. “Alright. I’m not an expert on this, but I’ve used this spell before. It’s a diagnosing tool, designed to let me know anything abnormal with your body.”
“And what did you find?”
Kaisa sighed. “Nothing. As far as physics is concerned, that is a perfectly ordinary child of about ten years. It is no illusion.”
“What?” Hilda blurted, a bit louder than she intended.
“Let me finish.” Kaisa quickly responded. “The spell certainly isn’t designed for any kind of telepathy, but it can tell if something is different with the brain. There’s definitely something up with her mind, which is to be expected, but unfortunately here is where my… unfamiliarity causes me to fall short. You said she had memories?”
“Nothing concrete, but she did know her way around a house she wouldn’t remember being in at ten, or however old she is now.”
“That’s promising, at least.”
“What’s really the matter, Ms. Kaisa?” Johanna cut in, somewhat harshly. “I know they’re hiding something from me.”
Hilda flinched. It wasn’t untrue, they were hiding something. Though honestly Hilda couldn’t help but admire Johanna’s confidence to ask that in front of all of them.
Kaisa paused, considering. “Something happened to you in Fairy Country, something that damaged your memories. And memories are very difficult to get rid of entirely, even if it is relatively easy to modify them.”
“They are?” David asked.
“Regardless,” Kaisa continued, “something powerful enough to damage your memory so severely might have caused other problems. They’re worried, I suppose, that you could still be… harmed, by a magic they don’t fully understand.”
Hilda sighed in relief. Nothing Kaisa said was technically untrue, but it successfully directed attention off the real issue at hand. Hilda wasn’t ready for that to come out just yet.
“Furthermore,” Kasia continued. “The three of them do care deeply for you, even if you may not remember them. Of this I am certain. And Hilda’s your family, right? I’m sure she just wants what is best for you.”
Johanna looked mollified. “That makes sense,” she mused, “though I still don’t really get how I could have forgotten having a sister.”
At that, Kaisa gave Hilda a look. Thankfully, she said nothing about the manner.
“Alright,” Kaisa said. “I’ve got to go find a couple of books that I imagine will be helpful. Why don’t the four of you go sit down at the table. Help yourself to whatever’s there.”
“Food in the library?” Frida inquired, arching an eyebrow at the fruit bowl sitting innocently on the table.
“Technically we’re not in the library right now, but tell no one about this.”
Frida giggled, grabbing an orange from the fruit bowl as Kaisa left. She was back remarkably quickly though, they had barely picked out a fruit each before she had returned with a stack of books levitating behind her. She also took a seat at the table and began flipping through the book on the top of the stack.
“Why are you helping us?” Johanna asked. “Why do you care?”
Kaisa blinked. “Why wouldn’t I? And besides, I have my own… personal investment, shall we say.”
“What investment?” Hilda asked.
Kaisa flushed a blotchy red. “B- Because Frida is my student, and Hilda is her familiar. Your wellbeing is important to her, meaning it’s important to my student, which means it’s important to me,” she said, a bit rushed.
A ‘personal investment’ didn’t seem too accurate for that explanation, but Kaisa had buried herself back into the book she was reading, indicating the conversation was over. Hilda mentally shrugged. Kaisa was a little weird like that, but Hilda couldn’t imagine her any other way.
Kaisa moved through the stack at remarkable speed. She wasn’t even using the table of contents, instead opening each book to some point in the middle and only flipping a few pages before she apparently found what she was looking for, eyes, darting back and forth until she finished with the book and moved on to the next. It was quite an enthralling sight, though Hilda tried not to stare. Johanna didn’t have such reservations, though Kaisa didn’t seem to notice, thankfully.
Barely ten minutes later, and Kaisa had gone through the entire stack. She sighed, setting the book back on the table. “Alright, I don’t have a solution right now, but that’s to be expected. I can’t know everything at once, that’s why we have libraries. I’ll do some more research, and I’ll talk with Tildy too. I’m sure we’ll find something. Eventually.”
“How long will it take?” Hilda asked. She had hoped Kaisa would zap her Mum back to normal, but in retrospect she should have figured such hopes were unlikely to go fulfilled. “Like a day?” Kaisa didn’t say anything. Her expression was neutral as always, making her difficult to read. “...a week?” Still no response. Hilda started feeling the beginning of dread at the back of her neck.
“Hilda, I’m bored!” Johanna interrupted. “If she’s done, can we leave?”
Hilda blinked. “Sure,” she said. She looked back at Kaisa, but she was sorting the books she had gotten out.
“Go,” Kaisa said. “Try not to worry about it.”
They exited back into the main library, perhaps in slightly lower spirits than they entered.
“Well, I suppose it was a bit naive to assume we would be able to fix this in an afternoon, but I’m still optimistic,” Frida said. David seemed to agree. Hilda, however, was a bit more worried. How long would she have to pretend to be a good caretaker? She was already starting to struggle, and it had been barely a day.
Lost in her thoughts as she was, Hilda barely noticed the walk to the exit. She was startled back to reality, though, when Kaisa suddenly appeared, pulling Hilda to the side. Hilda blinked. Hadn’t they left her behind to sort her books?
Kaisa didn’t allow Hilda the time to question that. “She called you sister,” Kaisa said in a low voice. Not threatening, but clearly not in approval. “I’m not judging you. Just know you’re going to have to come clean eventually. And I cannot guarantee that the time will come after we restore her.”
Hilda couldn’t find the words to respond. Kaisa didn’t seem to expect an answer though. “Just be careful,” she continued. “Things are going to be difficult either way. I don’t envy you.”
The four of them didn’t immediately head back to Hilda’s house, instead taking the time to re-familiarize Johanna with Trolberg.
“The city can be dangerous if you don’t know what you’re doing. If, for any reason, you get lost, there’s a couple places you can go to be safe. You can go to the library during the day; Kaisa will be there every day, even if she’s not working at the time. Alternatively, you can go to Frida or David’s house. Do you know where those are?”
Johanna shook her head.
“Then let's go show you.”
As they walked, Frida seemed more deeply in thought. Eventually, she made her concerns known.
“You know, Hilda, right now you can spend all day looking after Johanna, but summer holiday isn’t going to last forever.”
Hilda blinked. “Yeah, so?”
“You’ll have school, Hilda.”
“What? But that’s so far away!” Hilda said. “Surely she’ll be back to normal by then.”
“I’m not saying she won’t be!” Frida reassured. “But from what Kaisa implied, it’s still a possibility. One that the two of you won’t want to be surprised by.”
“You think I’d go to school? I can’t just leave her alone all day.”
Frida frowned slightly. “Hilda,” she reproached. “You can’t just not go to school.”
“Well who’s going to stop me?”
Frida opened her mouth, but then blinked. Because indeed, Johanna certainly wouldn’t make Hilda go to school. She paused, then readjusted her strategy.
“The law, for one. Your extended absence will be reported eventually. And I’m sure you don’t want any legal issues to manifest before you get things worked out.”
Hilda didn’t have a response to that. She still didn’t really understand how the government worked, but the idea of a bunch of safety patrol officers getting the wrong idea really struck her. Could they take her Mum away from her? She didn’t want to find out.
“Look, Hilda, I’m not trying to antagonize you. I’m just saying you’ll need a plan.”
Hilda had to think about it. It was true, she was fully expecting to get things sorted out in the next few days at worst. But Frida was right. She always was, except for the times that she wasn’t, but Hilda was pretty sure this was ‘sound advice’ Frida talking and not ‘bedrooms definitely clean themselves, what are you on about?’ Frida.
So she needed a plan for what to do with Johanna while Hilda was at school. Could she stay with Johanna? Alfur, no matter how helpful he was, wasn’t physically capable of caring for Johanna for more than a few hours at a time. Plus, Johanna probably wouldn’t be happy, staying inside all day.
Whenever she was stuck on what to do with Johanna, the thing that tended to work so far was to imagine what her Mum would do in the scenario. With that in mind, the solution came far quicker than expected, because her Mum had dealt with a problem quite similar to this.
“...How long does it take to enroll someone in school, do you think?”
By the time they made it back to Hilda’s house, the sun was beginning to creep below the city walls. Once again, David and Frida had to leave early. They had tried to explain that Hilda needed their help, but they had trouble imagining what kind of help required them out of the house for so long. And they couldn’t just tell them what happened, all four of them didn’t particularly care for magic things, and the circumstances regarding Johanna’s condition could be easily interpreted as too dangerous to risk having their kids around.
That left Hilda and Johanna in the house again. Hilda did her best to make dinner, it was nothing much compared to Johanna’s pies, but she was at least not unhappy with what she made. As she looked through the fridge for ingredients, though, she started to worry. She might have to go grocery shopping pretty soon.
“Hey, Alfur,” she asked. “Do you think you could help make a grocery list?”
“Absolutely. I’ll even help you when you go. I only wish that I could go on my own.”
“Don’t worry, Alfur, you’re a great help.”
After dinner, for lack of a better idea of what to do, Hilda set up a game of Dragon panic. When asked, Johanna claimed she didn’t remember the game, but when they got started she picked up the rules remarkably fast. In fact, barely ten turns in and she was the only one who was keeping up with Tontu.
After they cleaned up the game, Johanna was looking tired, so Hilda decided to put her to bed, this time making sure that she brushed her teeth and actually changed into pajamas. It was fine the first night, when the wounds were still fresh, but it wasn’t healthy to go on like that. Not that the wounds weren’t still fresh, but it would be better if it wasn’t made a habit.
As Hilda went to bed, this time in her own bedroom, she found herself deep in thought yet again. There was a nagging suspicion deep within her that was getting louder and louder. A suspicion that her Mum wouldn’t get back to normal, that she really was stuck like this. Kaisa certainly didn’t seem to think a solution was going to be easy to find. What if there wasn’t a solution to be found?
What would Hilda do, if they couldn’t find a solution? What would Johanna do? Would Johanna have to grow up a second time? Would she even turn out the same way? Questions like those plagued her as she lay alone in the darkness.
Sleep did not come easy to her that night.
Notes:
A little late, but it is still Friday in more than one time zone, so I'll count that as a win.
I keep forgetting about Alfur and Tontu lmao.
Next chapter is the reason I started this fic in the first place, so look forward to that!
Chapter 4
Summary:
They needed money, and Hilda really needed to let off steam. Two big problems that needed to be fixed.
A thought came to her. So incredibly simple it was hard to believe she hadn’t thought of it before. This was perfect! This could easily solve a not-insignificant fraction of her current worries! She couldn’t help the massive grin that spread across her face.
Theft!
Notes:
(See the end of the chapter for notes.)
Chapter Text
An unfortunate fact of the matter was that in Trolberg, people generally needed money to survive.
This was something that was becoming increasingly apparent to Hilda. She and Alfur were taking some time to go through the mail, something they hadn’t done since the whole situation with Johanna had gone down. Not a particularly great way to start the morning, but Alfur had insisted, and Hilda knew she had to get around to it eventually.
Sorting through the mail was about as dull as hilda had expected. There were a few advertisements, which they promptly put in the trash pile, but a lot of the contents weren’t so easily taken care of.
“Alfur, do you know how to pay bills, by chance?”
Hilda never really had an interest in helping her mother engage with capitalism. Even if she didn’t find the whole process dreadfully boring, it was still, even now, something she had a bit of difficulty understanding; having grown up in the wilderness was great, she wouldn’t change it for anything, but it did leave her with certain gaps in her understanding of human society.
“I’m not too familiar with the human version of the paperwork, but if it’s anything like what we elves have I’m sure I can figure it out,” Alfur replied. He scanned through the letters again, seemingly searching for something in particular. Whatever he was looking for, he found it incredibly quick. “In fact, here we go! A letter from Johanna’s employers!” Alfur declared, raising the treasure up for Hilda to see.
Hilda’s heart skipped a beat. How often did her Mum have to talk with the company she worked for? Working from home probably gave them a bit of leeway but she didn’t want her Mum to get back to normal only to find out she had lost her job.
She hastily took the letter from Alfur and opened it. Inside was a big grid of text, not quite what she expected. She had a bit of trouble deciphering it, but skipping to the bottom there was a cell labeled ‘net pay’ with what Hilda assumed was a reasonable amount of money.
“It’s a paycheck, I think. I’ve never actually seen one before.” Hilda set the letter down for Alfur to take a look at too, but she couldn’t help but be a little curious. Most of the contents were incomprehensible, but she felt it was her duty now to at least partially understand. Though honestly she’d probably just have to ask Alfur for help anyways.
“Well, that’s good. It gives us some money to work with, unless you happen to have Johanna’s bank details memorized.”
“I was more worried that it would say she was fired for not checking in, or something.”
“No, no, even us elves allow a reasonable length of no contact in case of emergency. Though I should draft up a letter to see if Johanna has any vacation days, or, even better, if she can go on extended leave.” He started writing something down on his tiny notepad. “I may need you to pen the actual letter, I don’t fancy taking an entire afternoon of a full-body workout to write at human-readable sizes.”
“No problem, Alfur.” Hilda was more just grateful for Alfur’s foresight. Penning the letter for him was the absolute least she could do for what he was offering.
“Though, I’m not too optimistic about the prospect of our finances,” Alfur mused, looking at Johanna’s paycheck. “I could budget this out for a while, but unless we find out exactly how long Johanna’s going to be like this, it’s entirely possible that we just run out of money.”
That was not what Hilda wanted to hear. This whole mess was getting to be extremely stressful for her. She was incredibly grateful for Alfur, she was entirely certain she would not be able to manage this side of adulting without him.
Indeed, that was the cause of a lot of problems. Hilda had been forced to be an adult, something she was certainly not prepared for. If she wanted to care for Johanna better, she needed to think more like an adult, no matter how unnatural that felt. She found herself deep in thought. What did adults do that she didn’t? The answer was quite obvious. Jobs. That was something that Hilda would have to figure out.
They needed money, and Hilda really needed to let off steam. Two big problems that needed to be fixed.
A thought came to her. So incredibly simple it was hard to believe she hadn’t thought of it before. This was perfect! This could easily solve a not-insignificant fraction of her current worries! She couldn’t help the massive grin that spread across her face.
Theft!
Not from people, no, she certainly wasn’t capable of that, or more accurately not in quantities that actually mattered. No, instead, her thoughts pointed well outside of Trolberg.
The mountain king’s treasure hoard should still have something valuable. The first time she had gone she was only there to collect Trundle’s eye, but it was hard to miss the piles and piles of gold and treasure that made up his hoard. That was only two years ago, it was more than likely at least some of it was still there. She certainly didn’t have any moral qualms about stealing from Trundle; he was, frankly, a lying bastard. A dead one, too. It wasn’t like he was going to notice.
As she thought about the idea some more, a plan started coalescing in her mind. She was sure Trylla would welcome the opportunity to talk to her favorite human, and honestly Hilda was missing her as well. She hadn’t gotten to play with Baba outside the walls for a while now, busy as she was with the fairy stuff.
There was going to be one problem with her brilliant plan, though. One tiny crack that threatened to shatter the entire thing. And that was Johanna. She wouldn’t be happy cooped up in the house all day. Not only was she almost as adventurous as Hilda was, but she only barely recognized the house they lived in. Even with Alfur supervising, she just wasn’t comfortable leaving Johanna for so long. Plus, it was becoming a pattern now, with Johanna expressing severe anxiety being separated from Hilda. Something that probably wasn’t healthy long term, but honestly such feelings seemed warranted after everything they had been through.
But what else could she do? She could potentially see if David or Frida could let Johanna stay at their houses, but even if Johanna was comfortable with that, which was very much up in the air, she might get bored. Plus, with her memories she didn’t even really know them beyond maybe a passing recognition.
No, if she was going through with this, and she really wanted to, since it was such a good idea, she would have to take Johanna with her.
Not all the way to the hoard, no, but she could certainly accompany Hilda up the mountain. Johanna could stay with Trylla and Baba while Hilda looted the mountain king’s throne, which hopefully shouldn’t take too long. She’d still be left alone for a bit, but honestly that was the best Hilda could hope for. It wasn’t too safe in the stone forest for anybody other than Hilda, and who knows? Maybe Johanna could make friends with Baba.
Johanna was, naturally, curious about Mum’s - technically her own - drawing table. She had displayed an intuitive understanding of the sliding mechanics of the desk, though she perhaps lacked the dexterity of her adult self. Hilda had been worried, slightly, that she would break something. Hilda had always been taught that the desk was largely off-limits, after all, and even now that she was older the attitude was hard to shake. But Johanna was clearly in her element there, and Hilda couldn’t help but acquiesce.
Hilda had cleaned off her Mum’s working area and set it to the side, to give Johanna a better area to work with and to ensure that her Mum’s work would go relatively untouched. Almost immediately, Johanna had started sketching out a picture of the two of them, and beyond a cursory glance admiring Johanna’s skill, Hilda let her get to it.
Since then, Johanna at the drawing table was once more a common sight for Hilda. Drawing gave something for Johanna to do while Hilda was busy, and as such in no time at all the desk was filled with multiple completed drawings, with even more still in progress.
Sure enough, when Hilda got up from the kitchen table, mail all but forgotten, Johanna was there at her drawing table, practically hunched over for how absorbed she was in whatever she was working on. So absorbed, in fact, that Johanna didn’t even react as Hilda walked over.
“Hey, Johanna, are you up for an adventure today?”
At that, Johanna bolted upright, flipping over the paper she was sketching on. “Absolutely!”
Hilda blinked, startled at the sudden enthusiasm. “Are you sure? You don’t even know where I planned on going.”
“Well, where are we going?” Johanna countered.
“I needed to go inside the mountain to go grab something, and I figured you could come along with me. I’ve got friends in there, so you won’t be alone.”
Johanna’s eyes widened. “Inside the- which mountain are you talking about?”
“I can point it out to you, but it should just be the big one you can see from your window.”
Johanna seemed to still be stuck on the ‘inside the mountain’ part, though. “Hilda, that’s so cool!”
Hilda flushed. Johanna wasn’t done yet though. “What’s it like inside there? Like a cave system? What were you planning on getting there?”
“It’s a lot more hollow than you might imagine. Like a big cavern more than anything. And I’m just planning on picking something up from the home of the mountain king, anyways.”
Johanna didn’t say anything, still looking at her with starry-eyed wonder.
“So, uh, are you still coming?”
“Absolutely.”
Alfur was, thankfully, amicable about them going on an adventure. Though that likely had more to do with the fact that she hadn’t exactly told him where they were going, only that they were going out together. He didn’t seem too worried, though he seemed more engrossed with whatever it was he was scribbling in his tiny notepad.
They took a bit of time to pack a quick snack, and then they were off. It wasn’t until they were already well outside the house, walking the streets of Trolberg that Johanna voiced a question.
“Who is the mountain king, by the way?”
Hilda scowled. “A massive jerk, is what he was,” she grumbled. At Johanna’s questioning gaze, Hilda continued. “He’s dead now, that’s what matters. He had a lot of treasure hidden away, I’m sure I’ll be able to find something interesting.”
“What kind of human lives inside the mountain?” Johanna mused.
“Human? No, the mountain king was a troll.”
Johanna jumped. “A troll?”
Hilda paused, considering. It wasn’t like there weren’t trolls outside of Trolberg, but they tended to stay in the area for a reason. It made sense that Johanna wouldn’t be as familiar with trolls.
“Yeah. Most trolls are pretty nice; don’t bother them and they won’t bother you,” Hilda explained. “But he was something else entirely. I’m not sad he’s gone.”
“Are you sure?” Johanna asked timidly.
“Very.” She grabbed Johanna’s shoulder. “Hey, I promised I wouldn’t let you get hurt, didn’t I? I meant it.”
Johanna relaxed. Something seemed to occur to her, and she turned to Hilda with a sly smile.
“So are your friends inside the mountain also trolls?”
“Shoot. I knew I forgot to mention something.”
Once Hilda had explained the trolls to her, Johanna was significantly more comfortable continuing their adventure. Johanna certainly looked happy exploring with her, hopping eagerly across the train tracks as they made their way outside the walls. They could have taken the gate closer to the mountain, but she figured they’d get less attention going this way.
The instant they were outside the Trolberg walls, though, Johanna seemed to transform, running eagerly through the grass. Hilda had to jog to keep up with her, which she certainly didn’t mind, but Hilda hadn’t expected this level of enthusiasm.
Her Mum had expressed interest in adventuring with Hilda back before, well, before, but it had always seemed almost insincere. Not that she wasn’t enjoying it, certainly not, but Hilda had seen how content her Mum could be just sitting inside the house all day. Hilda had gotten the impression that for her Mum, exploring and adventuring were work. Enjoyable work, sure, but work nonetheless. She couldn’t be certain, of course, but she couldn’t help the way she felt.
By contrast, Johanna took to the outdoors like a fish took to water. To her, the wilderness was a source of comfort, as it was - no, still is - to Hilda. Hilda couldn’t help but be reminded of herself. Give Johanna teal-colored hair and a deerfox by her side, and now more than ever she would be indistinguishable from Hilda at that age. It was… difficult to reconcile the two images of her Mum together.
One thing was clear, though. The two of them should really go exploring like this more often. Both before and after she got her Mum back.
“Alright, here we are!” Hilda said, stopping in front of a relatively small rock face.
The trek wasn't too long, as the Stone Forest was under the mountain right next to Trolberg’s walls. Trylla’s home was relatively high up the mountain, though, which meant they still had to trek a decent distance to find a nearby entrance. Luckily, Johanna hadn’t protested the climb. On the contrary, she often paused, looking back at the city with wonder. It was nice to see the walls get further and further away, and the height allowed them to see so much more of the horizon. Hilda thought she had a pretty good idea of what might show up on Johanna’s drawing table in the near future.
At Hilda’s words, Johanna stopped, eyeing the stone in front of them curiously. “Okay, but where is the entrance? I thought we were going inside the mountain?”
“We are, just give me a moment,” Hilda replied.
She walked up to the entrance, gently resting a hand on the firm rock. She focused, like Trylla had taught her. Baring her identity for the mountain to see.
The stone shuddered slightly, before sliding open.
Hilda sighed with relief. She still wasn’t too practiced opening the mountain on her own. On the occasions she went inside, Trylla usually met them outside the mountain, and the entrance was always open.
She turned back to Johanna, about to give her a smile, but was startled by her expression. Johanna had stars in her eyes, looking at her like she was… cool.
“Hilda, that was so amazing! How did you do that? Can I do that?”
Hilda was taken aback at Johanna’s enthusiasm. She had never seen her Mum with this level of childish excitement before. She didn’t really know how to react.
“It’s a long story,” Hilda eventually settled on. “And as to whether you can, I suppose that’s something you’ll have to ask Trylla about.”
Johanna’s enthusiasm seemed to melt away, though, as Hilda moved to step inside the cavern. She looked incredibly nervous, reluctant to follow Hilda’s footsteps. As though she hadn’t realized until now what going inside the mountain would mean.
“Hey, Johanna, what’s wrong?” She asked, trying to be reassuring.
“I don’t know. The idea of it seemed fine at first, but now that we're here I can’t help but get a horrible feeling about going inside.”
“Hey, don’t worry,” Hilda placated. “I promised I would keep you safe, yeah? I wouldn’t take you anywhere that I wasn't sure you’d be protected.”
Johanna looked mollified by that, at least. Still, she didn’t let go of Hilda’s hand as they made their way inside the mountain. Though honestly Hilda was grateful for that. While Johanna’s enthusiasm for exploring was endearing so far, this place was historically the worst place for them to get separated. Though, on second thought, the fairy isle might have edged the mountain out of the title. Sill, definitely not a good place for them to get lost.
It was nice to get out of the sun, though. The darkness was refreshing, filling her limbs with energy. She kept a slower pace though, so that Johanna would be more comfortable. She probably wouldn’t appreciate being dragged along as Hilda bolted through the caverns.
The first thing out of Trylla’s mouth when they arrived was a bemused “I didn’t know humans could shrink?”
“Well hello to you, too, Trylla,” Hilda said. “And it turns out neither of us are fully human, actually. Anyways, Johanna, this is Trylla, and the little one goes by Baba.” Baba gave a couple happy babbles at her mention.
Trylla gave them a long, slow look. “So then what’s up with her?” She pointed at Johanna.
“We had a nasty run in with fairy magic. But that’s not why we’re here.” She paused. “Unless… would you happen to know how to reverse this?”
“I’m sorry, are you two talking?” Johanna asked. “Hilda, how are you understanding her?”
“It’s, uh, part of that long story I mentioned earlier,” Hilda said, sheepishly. “Don’t worry, I’ll fill you in.”
Trylla took that as a cue to continue. “All I know of fairies are their existence, unfortunately, and even that knowledge is not well known among the trolls.”
“I figured. The reason I’m here, the real reason, is… uh…” Hilda felt embarrassed saying it out loud. “I need to steal some treasure from the mountain king’s hoard.”
Hilda was expecting admonishment for stealing from the dead. Or for disrespecting a troll’s hoard. Instead she was met by genuine curiosity.
“For what?” Trylla asked.
Not the response she was expecting, but she didn’t seem disapproving. That was promising at least.
“Well, with Johanna the way she is, neither of us have jobs.”
Trylla paused, considering. “So…” she eventually started, still sounding confused. “You’re… getting her a gift so she feels better?”
“No. We plan on selling it, so we can get, like. Food. And stuff.”
“So you trade the gold for the things you want.” She seemed proud of her conclusion. “It is true, humans are quite fond of shiny things, from what I’ve noticed. Though they do seem to behave unpredictably at times. Are you sure they’ll want to trade for the gold?”
“We’re not trading the gold directly- never mind,” Hilda said. This wasn’t why she had come here. “I need to ask you a favor.”
Trylla’s consistent failure to understand the concept of currency aside, she was amicable to the idea of watching over Johanna while Hilda went exploring.
The problem came when Hilda had to translate their discussion for Johanna.
“Ok, Johanna, don’t get mad, but I’m going to have to leave you with Trylla and Baba here.”
Johanna froze. “Why?” She asked, incredulously.
“It’s… dangerous here. Most trolls seem to tolerate me just fine, but a lot of trolls still harbor resentment towards humans. I’d like to take you with me, I really do, but it’s just not safe, especially further down.”
Johanna nodded thoughtfully. “That makes sense, I suppose. Honestly I wasn’t too excited about the prospect of wandering around down here. I normally like exploring, but here? It just feels off.”
That made sense. This place certainly wasn’t a good memory for her Mum.
“Plus, these trolls seem… familiar, in a way. And, you said they weren’t dangerous. Just, don’t take too long, if you can manage it?”
“Don’t worry, I’ll be back as soon as I can.”
Hilda didn’t like to admit it, but she had missed being under the mountain. The darkness and dampness of the air practically filled her with energy. She had visited on occasion, with her mother too, no less, but such outings were infrequent at the best of times.
Trylla’s home was relatively high up the mountain, and the castle of the mountain king was at the very deepest part of the cavern. As such, much of her travels involved her making her way down steep slopes, if not outright cliff faces. She wasn’t looking forward much to the trek back up.
She lept off of a small ledge, landing on the stone below with a weighty thunk. She rarely had the opportunity to just move like this. It was refreshing, in a way. Sure, in Trolberg there were plenty of trees to climb, or shallow architecture to jump around, but oftentimes she had to go out of her way to find them.
What was expected of her was to walk to school on perfectly flat sidewalks, sit down in class all day, and walk back home. Everything was flat, except where natural terrain forced them to accommodate the slopes, but even then they would often install steps, and what were steps but simply more flat surfaces to walk on? Here, though, the wilderness was untamed. Hilda had to maneuver through whatever was in front of her instead of requiring a trail of asphalt to tell her where to go.
The dim ambiance of the mountain became brighter still as her eyes continued to adjust to the light, or lack thereof. As she ran, she half expected to look up and see a full moon, despite the rocky ceiling overhead, it was that well illuminated. Beyond a faint feeling of gratefulness, she didn’t think about it much, though. She could see, that was all that mattered.
She hadn’t had an opportunity to just run like this since everything that had happened on the fairy isle. It certainly served as stress relief, if nothing else. She could run like this for hours, never getting tired.
But of course, the mountain wasn’t that big. Certainly not small, but it felt like no time at all had passed before she found herself on a ledge overlooking the home of the mountain king.
The hoard of the mountain king was looking a lot less opulent than she remembered. Though honestly that was to be expected. The secret passage leading to the hoard remained open from when she first went, and that was well over a year ago. She imagined she wasn’t the only troll harboring ill-will towards him.
She blinked. This place must have been getting to her. Why did she think of herself as a troll?
Regardless, the mountain king was definitely dead, so there was no reason not to take whatever she could find. What was a pile of rocks going to do about it, anyway?
Many of the larger piles of gold were gone, presumably carried away by whatever other trolls had found the place. That didn’t matter too much, there were still plenty of scattered coins on the floor still, and she was only filling a single comparatively small backpack. In barely a few minutes, the backpack was modestly filled.
She hoped this was real gold. Gold was supposed to be heavy, or so she had heard, but even the full backpack barely weighed her down at all. Though the cloth of the pack looked like it had seen better days, the stitchings pulled remarkably tight. It probably wasn’t designed to fit this volume of payload, she reasoned.
She surveyed the treasure room once more before she left. If nothing else, such a hoard was impressive, but she didn’t feel sad seeing the state the room was in now. She figured whatever other trolls had looted the place probably appreciated the gold more than Trundle did. Probably deserved it more, too.
Hilda had no trouble making her way back to Trylla’s abode with the stolen treasure, even with all the slopes she had to climb. The climb was exhilarating more than anything, even with the now-full pack she was carrying.
Despite knowing that the mountain king was long since dead, she couldn’t help but feel a rush of exhilaration as she ran through the stone forest. Some primal part of her reacted with glee at the prospect of stealing something, and insisted that she needed to get away, quickly. She had no reason not to indulge in that sensation, even if the fear that usually accompanied such thoughts was absent. Plus, she wanted to get back to Johanna as soon as possible. She was sure Johanna was starting to get anxious with only trolls for company, even if said trolls were very nice.
As she turned down the final corridor before Trylla’s home, she heard the troll’s voice..
“...looks like Hilda’s found her way back.”
No response from Johanna, though Hilda supposed that she couldn’t understand the troll’s words. Though when Hilda made her way into the firelight, Johanna’s eyes lit up.
“Hilda! You’re- oh” Johanna’s smile vanished as she stared at Hilda.
“What’s wrong?” Hilda asked.
Johanna looked like she was having trouble finding the right words. “Why are your eyes glowing?” she eventually asked.
Hilda stopped short. What was she talking about? “What do you mean? My eyes aren’t glowing?”
“Yes, they are,” Johanna insisted. “And your skin looks paler, and your nose looks longer, too.”
Johanna wouldn’t lie to her, of that Hilda was relatively certain, but what she was saying didn’t make any sense at all. She must just be mistaken, having trouble seeing with just the fire for light.
Still, she walked over to the small pools Trylla had in her room, to check her reflection, if only to be absolutely sure. However, it turned out that somehow, Johanna was right. Her eyes were glowing, slightly, and her features looked remarkably trollish. She wasn’t transformed fully, not like on the night of the trolls, but she looked distinctly not human.
“Trylla, what’s happening to me? Why is this happening now?”
“You’re not just a regular human, you know. It’s likely for the same reason you can still understand me,” Trylla said.
“What’s she saying?” Johanna loudly whispered, as if proving the point.
Hilda didn’t answer, instead sitting down by the magical fire next to Johanna, setting her spoils down next to her with a loud thunk. Johanna looked curious, but she was doing a remarkable job of restraining herself from asking. Hilda laughed, telling her to go ahead and take a look if she was so curious.
Johanna moved the backpack closer to her to get a better look. Or she tried to, anyway. Instead of the backpack moving Johanna ended up pulling herself towards the bag. Bemused, Johanna attempted to lift the bag. Emphasis on tried. Even with her legs firmly planted she failed to get the bag off the ground at all.
“This is heavy,” Johanna gasped. “What did you put in here?”
“You’re welcome to look,” Hilda said. Johanna wasted no time opening up the top to reveal the decent amount of golden coins Hilda had found. Johanna’s eyes went wide.
“Is this real gold?”
“I thought so at first, but I’m pretty sure gold is heavier.”
“Heavier than this?” Johanna asked, bewildered. “This might even be heavier than me!”
“Don’t be silly. You’re young. Besides, I’m not sure I could lift you even if I tried.” To demonstrate, Hilda hooked her arms underneath Johanna’s and made a show of attempting to lift her. Or that had been her intent, at least, because Johanna suddenly found herself at least a foot off the ground.
Hilda blinked, setting Johanna carefully down before looking at her own hands. She had lifted a lot back when she was a troll, including her own Mum when she was a full-grown adult, but she had thought that was behind her now that she was a human again.
She thought back to her appearance. Maybe not as human as she thought.
They said their goodbyes to Trylla and Baba before heading out of the mountain. The route was familiar, and in no time at all the faintest glow of sunlight was shining just up ahead.
Hilda had been underground for so long that even the slightly illuminated stone of the tunnel was painful to her eyes. Irritating, sure, but nothing that was too debilitating. Or that was what she thought, because as soon as she stepped out into the setting sun, her skin burned.
She let out an involuntary hiss at the pain. For a brief moment, it was as if she was back to being a troll, turning to stone in the terribly bright sunlight. But no, despite the pain, she wasn’t slowing down at all, though her limbs did seem to feel heavier.
Abruptly, the bag on her back seemed to multiply its weight by tenfold. Still manageable, but significantly more difficult to carry around. She took a subtle look at her hands, all too aware of Johanna’s concerned stare. Indeed, they were looking significantly more fleshy.
Hilda gave what she hoped was a reassuring smile in response to Johanna’s questioning gaze.
It seemed, even still, that she impulsively tried to hide any pain from her Mum. Even if she wasn’t Mum anymore.
Sneaking back into Trolberg went by easily enough. The walk back to the apartment was perhaps less energetic, though certainly not from lack of enthusiasm. Johanna was just tired, probably.
“Hey, Hilda?” Johanna eventually asked.
“Yeah?”
“Thanks for taking me with you.”
Hilda paused, considering. “I left you with Trylla and Baba though?”
“True, but you took me up the mountain with you. You could have just left me at the house all day.”
Two things stood out to Hilda. First, Johanna used the term ‘the house’ to describe their house, not ‘my house’ or ‘our house.’ But that made sense, things were still pretty new for her.
More importantly, there was weight behind that gratitude. She had guessed that Johanna was sensitive to being left alone, that much was obvious, but this was clearly more important than Hilda had realized. But Hilda didn’t mind such attachment, she liked having Johanna around. Even beyond keeping an eye on Johanna to make sure she was safe.
“I would never. I enjoy your company, anyways.”
“Still, thanks. You’re an amazing sister.”
Johanna continued talking, something about apologizing for the lack of memory. But Hilda was no longer listening, her mind stuck on that single word. Sister. It was true, that was how she had justified their strong connection, but this was the first time that Johanna was addressing her as sisters.
Hilda was… not as shaken up about it as she expected.
It should have been difficult, her own Mum not recognizing Hilda for who she was. Hilda didn’t know the exact feelings she should be having about the matter, only that they probably should be there. Guilt, perhaps, for deceiving her Mum like this, but she had plenty to be guilty about already, and she was sure her Mum would find the whole thing amusing once everything was sorted out. Would probably praise her, actually.
Strangely, having Johanna as a sister felt… normal. Still novel, of course, this whole situation was only a few days old. But she was becoming comfortable with this significantly faster than perhaps she should.
Johanna was just, nice to be around. Enthusiastic, she reminded Hilda much of herself. And Hilda might have some issues with self-worth, she was mature enough to admit that, but even that couldn’t keep Hilda from, well, loving this child who, had she not been her own Mum, she could easily see becoming her sister for real.
Hilda paused at that thought. What if Johanna was just Johanna, not her Mum? The scenario came incredibly easily to Hilda’s mind. Johanna, abandoned by her parents, even if due to circumstances beyond their control, meets Hilda in the Fairy Isle and becomes friends. But instead of the reveal of just who she was, they simply come across Mum and all three of them make it out unscathed. Johanna stays with them, at first because she has nowhere else to go, but she is so much like Hilda that the three of them can’t help but stick together.
There was another similar scenario, lurking deep within her mind where she refused to look directly. It developed slowly, almost unconsciously, when her worst thoughts slipped to the front. The same happens, meeting Johanna in the fairy isle, and emerging unscathed. But they don’t find her Mum. Wouldn’t it be easier, that horrible voice whispered, if Johanna wasn’t her Mum? If she was just Johanna, her new sister? She tried to ignore those thoughts, because wouldn’t that mean she was giving up on her Mum? It might be easier, sure, but she couldn’t just give up on her Mum like that.
The conversation died down as they eventually reached their house.
Hilda was glad for the opportunity to set down her backpack, her back was starting to kill her. Almost as soon as they walked through the front door, she marched over to the kitchen and swung her bag onto the table, checking to make sure she wasn’t accidentally squishing Alfur first, of course. The noise resonated throughout the house, causing Hilda to flinch. She hadn’t meant to be that loud.
“Hilda! Johanna! You’re back!” Well, in any case, it at least let Alfur know they had arrived.
“Alfur!” Hilda was definitely glad to see him.
“Were you successful?”
“You tell me,” Hilda said, tipping the bag over, allowing some of the coins to spill out. This time, Hilda made sure to tip it slowly, not wanting another loud noise. She didn’t need complaints from the neighbors on top of everything else right now.
Alfur was clearly startled regardless, speechless at the sight.
“...Well, um.” Alfur stuttered, trying to regain his composure. “That- that solves the money problem for now, I suppose.” He paused, mind still trying to catch up. “W- Wait! Where did you get this? Do I need to be worried?”
“Oh, no, don’t worry about that. He’s not around anymore to care.”
“Well, that’s a relief, I suppose.”
A beat. As she stared at her spoils, something she hadn’t thought about came to mind. Perhaps something she should have thought about before.
“Hey, uh, Alfur?” Hilda asked
“Yes, Hilda?”
“I, uh, don’t know how to sell this.”
Notes:
Oh boy it's the idea that made me write this fic in the first place!
Really enjoyed writing this, even if midterms were kind of annoying. I might take this past chapter 5, I've got a couple more ideas that I still want to write, but I haven't outlined anything solid yet.
Fyhvguhv (Guest) on Chapter 1 Sat 03 Feb 2024 02:19AM UTC
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Bitco8nHaZcker on Chapter 1 Sat 03 Feb 2024 09:26AM UTC
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why_is_my_original_username_taken on Chapter 1 Sat 03 Feb 2024 12:44PM UTC
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The_Freaky_One2325 on Chapter 1 Thu 08 Feb 2024 03:11PM UTC
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data_sprite12 on Chapter 1 Wed 21 Feb 2024 11:45PM UTC
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data_sprite12 on Chapter 2 Thu 22 Feb 2024 12:06AM UTC
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Dyhgdyuhdry on Chapter 3 Sat 17 Feb 2024 05:05AM UTC
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data_sprite12 on Chapter 3 Thu 22 Feb 2024 12:28AM UTC
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Maverick_Dragon on Chapter 3 Sat 24 Feb 2024 02:04AM UTC
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FlippySpatula on Chapter 3 Sat 24 Feb 2024 02:08AM UTC
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The_Nachtkrapp_King on Chapter 4 Sat 24 Feb 2024 06:14AM UTC
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Dyhgdyuhdry on Chapter 4 Sat 24 Feb 2024 12:36PM UTC
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data_sprite12 on Chapter 4 Sat 24 Feb 2024 04:43PM UTC
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Maverick_Dragon on Chapter 4 Sat 20 Apr 2024 03:06AM UTC
Last Edited Sat 20 Apr 2024 03:10AM UTC
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FlippySpatula on Chapter 4 Sat 20 Apr 2024 02:27PM UTC
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Maverick_Dragon on Chapter 4 Sat 20 Apr 2024 02:40PM UTC
Last Edited Sat 20 Apr 2024 02:43PM UTC
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The_Freaky_One2325 on Chapter 4 Sat 18 May 2024 09:48PM UTC
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Ralte on Chapter 4 Fri 14 Jun 2024 11:19PM UTC
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thimble (thimble14) on Chapter 4 Sun 19 Jan 2025 10:24AM UTC
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FlippySpatula on Chapter 4 Sun 19 Jan 2025 06:56PM UTC
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