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Gonzo can't always express his reasons for doing the things he does. One night, he and Camilla sing "In-A-Gadda-Da-Vida" at top voice together on the roof until three in the morning. Two days later, he's blowing himself out of a cannon again. Then he soaks his head in a bucket of milk.
Even Kermit, Mister Nice Guy himself, thinks he's weird, and Gonzo can't blame him. It's instinct when he shoves one finger into the electrical outlet. It's instinct when he yodels selections from the Der Ring des Nibelungen on stage instead of tap-dancing through the vaudeville number he's practiced for days.
Instinct has a lot to answer for.
His instincts aren't always bad. For no reason he understands, he juggles full buckets of water the same night the Swedish Chef tries to entertain the crew with St. Lucia's treats and sets his chef hat on fire. He accidentally manages to short out the entire Muppet Studios network by plugging in his souped-up WeirdPod into Statler's USB port right before Waldorf hits 'send' on a scathing review of a YouTube video made by the son of their largest corporate sponsor. Instinct makes him grab the test tube from Beaker's hand and do a presto chango disappearing trick, which instead flies right out of his grip and across the sound stage, and if the explosion when the test tube hits the floor blows out two walls and all the windows in the building, it doesn't also blow up Beaker.
"Gonzo!" Kermit's exasperated shout is just as familiar as the sound of tinkling glass from his latest mistake.
Gonzo lets out an embarrassed sigh. "I know, I know. We don't touch other people's experiments."
Beaker is still trembling. Bunsen pats his arm. "Bit too much nitroglycerin in the formula. We'll have to try it again."
Gonzo watches them walk away together back to their lab. He watches George mutter and grab his broom, and watches Kermit shake his head as he and Scooter go look over the repairs budget to see if there's a line item for windows. Everybody has a place to be, except him. He doesn't belong here. He doesn't belong anywhere, unless there's somewhere drinking water through your nose is considered fine manners.
He hears a soft cluck. "Hey, Camilla."
She glances over the wreckage and shrugs, indicating in one spread of wings the wholeness of existence in her opinion. "Bawk."
"Yeah."
"Bawk bawk bawk bawk."
"I don't think so."
"Bawk!"
"Maybe. He probably wouldn't have dropped it."
"Bawk bawk?"
"Okay, maybe I saved his life a little, but I don't think by accident counts."
Another shrug. "Bawk. Bawk bawk bawk bawk bawk."
Gonzo smiles. "I'm glad I'm somebody's hero, anyway."
She rests her feathered head against his arm. Softly, she begins to sing, "Bawk bawk bawk bawk bawk bawk bawk bawk bawk ..."
He can't resist. "Don't you know that I love you?"
"Bawk bawk bawk bawk bawk bawk bawk bawk bawk!"
"Don't you know that I'll always be true?"
"DRUM SOLO!" shouts Animal from across the room and crashes into his drums. Dr. Teeth and Floyd try to tackle him. Piggy shouts from her dressing room that everyone is ruining her concentration. A smaller, more contained explosion comes from the direction of the lab. Kermit lets out a moan of annoyance at the ruckus.
It's a good day.