Chapter Text
“0H c0M3 0n DuD3! Th1s #### 1s r1GG3D 2 D4 C0REE!!! D,x”
Currently raging at his setup like a prepubescent twelve-year-old was an exasperated Kasper. A quick glance at the clock atop his desk would confirm that it was deep into the night, the red digital lettering displaying the time of 2:42 AM. The robloxian sighed, sinking back into the stiff leather of his gaming chair.
Usually, staying up late to indulge in video games was deemed a pretty unhealthy trait. Kasper didn’t need to sleep though, because for him, resting wasn’t a necessity. If he could accept the appearance of cruel bags blotching the area beneath his eyes, he got to stay up and game wicked late. It wasn’t a horrible trade-off, who cared about having ‘panda eyes’ anyways? Killing randos in Crossroads was loads of fun, even if PVP did bring out the worst of his “G4M3R r4Ge T3NdaNc13S :33".
Eyeing the half-empty Fizz-Up bottle resting next to his keyboard, Kasper grabbed it and promptly leaned back, taking a swig of the carbonated drink. This was probably his third one today. He’d be due to pay Yum Zlurplie a visit soon if he had any respect for his soda restock.
The server was dying out. With a displeased sniffle, the robloxian set the bottle back down, wiping the oozy run-off from his nose with his bare forearm. He leaned into peer at the bright screen of his monitor, squinting his eyes to observe the chat. Despite the sea of toxic messages spewed from malding (Br4H, Ur S0 M4D Ur B4Ld1Ng!!) children, Kasper's eye still managed to catch a glimpse of the purple nametag in the midst of it all. It was a private message from his friend.
{To EpiKasp3r} You are now privately chatting with Faxtor291_DS
{From Faxtor291_DS} [Faxtor291_DS]: yo dude whats up with u. did u punch ur keyboard again or smth
{From Faxtor291_DS} [Faxtor291_DS]: uve been standing still for a min
Scratching at his acne to relieve some of the itch, Kasper quickly pressed the slash on his keyboard. The robloxian began typing out a response, the mere luminance of the screen barely aiding his eyes as his fingers deftly moved across the keyboard.
{To Faxtor291_DS} [EpiKasp3r]: 1m gud m4n, just st0pp3d 2 tak3 a dr1nk xD!!
{To Faxtor291_DS} [EpiKasp3r]: Als0 C0M333 0n Dud3, th4t 0nly happ3N3nD l1ek,,, 3 t1mes??? l0l
{From Faxtor291_DS} [Faxtor291_DS]: u forgot the “1” in dront of the 3 bro
{From Faxtor291_DS} [Faxtor291_DS]: front*
{To Faxtor291_DS} [EpiKasp3r]: -_- r11111ly…
{From Faxtor291_DS} [Faxtor291_DS]: lol yes
{From Faxtor291_DS} [Faxtor291_DS]: now come help me pwn these nerds theyve been teaming on me for 4 mins
{To Faxtor291_DS} [EpiKasp3r]: SuR3 Th1nG D00d!!1 xdd
Snickering at the visual image of his friend getting teamed on, Kasper clutched his mouse with the pure intention of demolishing some kids-- when his screen suddenly flickered. Once, twice. Then it was back on again? He blinked. That was a little odd. Sure, Kasper had an old computer, and when he means old, he means absolutely ancient. The collecting-dust-in-the-deepest-darkest-crevice-of-some-old-dude’s-attic-until-he-decided-to-sell-it-at-a-garage-sale-for-25-bucks kind of ancient. A few peculiar glitches were normal here and there, nothing new, and if anything at least it wasn’t the infamous “blue screen of death”. So, per usual, Kasper shrugged it off. Nothing less of negligence, bro.
The vivid picture of his game was back on and running, and luckily he hadn't been disconnected. Shaking the mouse around a bit proved he was still in, so he leaned in to scope out his next pwnage victim when…
He felt fizzy liquid splash on his hand, utterly unexpected.
With a reaction time that challenged the tortoise species as a whole, a shocked Kasper gawked down to see that the remnants of his drink had been split all over his desk. The sticky liquid had splashed all over his keyboard as well, tarnishing the black caps with a wet sheen.
“Wh4T th3 ####?! AH Cr4P…” Some of the liquid had leaked off of his desk, dripping right onto his shirt and into his lap and dampening the fabric. Awesome, amazing. Absolutely amazeballs, now to the third party it was going to look as if he had pissed himself.
Quickly lifting the bottle with a sigh, he dejectedly peered down to inspect the total damage. Was anything salvageable? Critical. Jamming a finger into the arrow keys proved to be futile because his character wasn't moving from its place. As stiff as a board. As immovable as bedrock. As still as a weeping angel. This keyboard was his last spare, and now it was due for the dumps.
All he could do was watch the scene of his poor avatar getting killed, and then danced on.
"0h s3R10UslY d00D... 1 W4Sn'T 3v3N m0V1Ng!!! >:I"
Frustrated to his sickly core, Kasper questioned the cause for the bottle to fall in the first place. He recalls his wrist being absolutely nowhere near it. Sure, Kasper wasn’t the brightest when it came to playing it safe, opting to leave open bottles near his monitor for ‘easy access’ (who has time to unscrew bottle lids mid-game?), but he wasn’t foolish enough to leave it so close to his wrist while he was gaming (aware of his range of movement when it came to sensitivity settings), or to leave any of his components in the splash zone.
It was only when he shoved his chair backward that he saw the culprit. Previously obscured by the beanie that covered his peripheral vision was none other than Unpleasant herself, simply standing there in all of his… Unpleasant glory. Gripped in its palm was a glaggle stress ball, one that was resting placidly amongst the rest of Kasper’s desk junk a mere moment ago.
In order to grab it, one would have to reach past the bottle, and a freak like Unpleasant was ultimately incapable of performing any task that required a single-digit percentage of precision.
Kasper glared up at the gradient, who was only slightly taller than him while he was sitting. The robloxian was frantically trying to convince every blood cell in his body not to strangle the living life out of her. (Even if he did, it wouldn’t kill her. Unpleasant was simply beyond any of his available comprehension… Some sort of wicked alien xenomorph Killer Klowns From Outer Space deal).
“Wh4T— Dud3! Wh4T 1s wr0nG w1th Y0u>?? S3r10usLy!!!” he hissed, holding his sticky palms out in irritation. “D0 Y0u N0t Kn0w H0w 2 th1Nk?? 1f Y0U w4Nt S0M3th1ng, JuST a5K m3 2 g3t 1t 4 Y0u N3xT T1Me!!!!”
Unpleasant stared. Well— he had no eyes, but still. It was facing in his general direction or whatever. The gradient showed no change in emotion. Not a single ounce of remorse or empathy for the pathetic sight it just managed to cause. She just squeezed the yellow-stress ball and trudged away toward the door of his room. Seriously, how does Jermery gather up the willpower to deal with that… thing?
Well… I mean, on the other hand... How does anyone deal with Jermery— Annddd he just answered his own question.
“1F y0Ur l3Av1ng, Cl0Se D4 D00R 0n D4 WAy OuT!” Kasper yelled, shaking the hem of his shirt. “AnD pR3fErAblY, N3V3r C0ME bAcK! Y0U L1TTL3 ######!!! D,X ”
Of course, Kasper’s apartment door remained completely wide open, and of course, Unpleasant would definitely be coming back. His sinuses were so unkind, causing Kasper to sneeze, a tell-tale sign that a mean headache was brewing from the recent occurrence of events. Even worse, he couldn't even reply to his clearly bemused online friend, the keys well beyond any hope of properly functioning.
And of course Unpleasant had taken his only stress ball. Nice.
Rubbing at his eyes, he stared at the time. 3:03 AM. Marinating in his own frustration wasn't going to fix anything. He might as well go out and skate, and breathe in whatever fresh air he could (without accounting for the city smog). The cool breeze was always a sweet neutralizer to his headaches, no matter how much he used to deny it.
Shaking his mouse around proved that it luckily still worked. Congratulations mouse, You have survived the Fizz-Up tsunami. Live 2 tell the tale, they say. He quickly closed the tab to Crossroads and shut off his PC. He could explain himself to Faxtor on chat later, surely the dude would understand.
The robloxian stood up, the uncomfortable dampness of his clothing making him wince. He reached for a pack of wipes, pulling a few out to swiftly rub down the surface of his desk. It was already sticky after a few minutes, so to try and clean up after an hour or so? It would be horrendous. Unfortunately, Kasper has learned from hands-on experience. It did wonders for the stomach, but not for anything else. Rule 1 of Fizz-Up. Whatever you do, don’t let it spill and settle!
Yep. That was the only rule so far.
Once the whole ordeal was behind him, Kasper tossed the stained wipe into the trash and glared resentfully at the empty Fizz-Up bottle, as if the object was to blame. Sighing, he turned away to reach for his tattered backpack. He decided that he'd deal with the whole keyboard situation later, preferably when he's not feeling the particular urge to vent by slamming his head into the wall, pure frustration style.
Kasper stuffed his hand into his backpack, pulling out his MLG shades that he got as a birthday gift from Poob a few years ago. They always made him feel better, a true fan of mlg! He promptly slid them onto his face.
On the way to his balcony door he reached down to pick up his skateboard that was propped against the wall. It was a sweet thing, a neat galaxy pattern plastered on the bottom. There was even a rainbow cat carelessly painted atop it, surrounded by a build-up of random stickers he slapped on over time. The wheels were a metallic pink, picked out by yours truly. Sure the board was a complete eyesore, and sure it was tattered, grip tape fraying off the edges and hanging on for dear life, but the bearings had recently been replaced. She was totally set to survive plenty of future skate seshes.
Moreover, it was one of his oldest boards. He refused to let it die off in such a lame way.
While tucking the board beneath the crevice of his armpit, Kasper tugged the heavy balcony door open. Accompanying his every movement was the jingle of his backpack keychains, a variety of colorful trinkets clicking against each other. The robloxian quietly slid the door shut with a soft click.
Usually, he’d opt to leave his balcony door open, the cool night easing his clogged sinuses. It was only until that gradient appeared, having seemingly materialized out of nothing, that he felt compelled to keep it shut at night. At any chance given, Unpleasant would chase around the moths and grasshoppers that somehow snuck their way through the doors as if she were an insane cat attempting to catch a laser dot. The gradient would scramble around like a bull in a china shop, bumping into shelves and knocking over Kasper’s precious belongings such as his electric guitar or TV.
The nail in the coffin was the time Unpleasant finally managed to catch one of the grasshoppers in his grasp...
And then promptly stuffed it in his mouth, chewing it slowly before swallowing.
It was sick, and not in a cool way. Seriously, Kasper was already queasy enough without Unpleasant around, did he seriously need a secondary source for his nausea?
With a sigh, Kasper made his way towards the compacted brick wall that dueled as a cheap guard rail. He stuck his head over the side, peering down below. It was unusual for anyone else to be up this early, the only visible lightning being that of the dim street lamps that lined the corridor. After peering past strung-up electrical wires and eyeing the rats scurrying around the base of the dumpster below, Kasper breathed in a sigh of relief, enjoying the fresh air.
The wind felt refreshing. A gentle, cool breeze sifted by, solidifying why Kasper would chose to be a night owl over a morning bird any day. Nocturnal people had the opportunity to explore places in a completely different atmosphere. Relishing the chilled air, Kasper watched as small insects buzzed around the soft glow of the street lamp. His balcony was dark, artificial light too far away to cast any serious luminance, but still close enough to allow him to get a decent view of his surroundings.
Interrupted by a sneeze, Kasper sniffed. "W3lL, th4T HuRt..." He muttered to himself. It was probably also a good sign for him to get going.
The robloxian vaulted the short wall, mindful not to clip the edge of his skateboard against the side, and clutched onto the rusty railing of the ladder leading down. Descending it without any trouble, he reached for the second one, easily sliding down it one-handed. It didn’t take much of a parkour master to traverse his apartment complex. After all, he practically grew up here.
Thud. The heels of his vans made contact with the concrete below, and Kasper rose to full his height, brushing off the front of his shirt with a fleet motion. Fortunately, the fabric was already significantly less damp due to the shift in atmosphere. Awesome, a true natural drying machine at work! He’d probably wander around for a bit, sneak out the old rustic gate to indulge in a little sesh, and then stealthily creep his way back to apartment 007 before the sun hit the rise.
Despite stereotypical life propaganda of alleyways being the all-time brewer of evil, the alley that bordered his complex was surprisingly chill. This is where he’d even come to smoke occasionally too. He didn’t see his neighbors much, but he'd occasionally wave to them when they were out on their own respective balconies, hanging a load of clothes to dry or throwing their weekly trash out.
It wasn't uncommon for Kasper to be a victim of late-night noise complaints in the form of crudely scribbled notes. Occasionally, his neighbors might even add an insult here or there to solidify their point! It's fine, he's only received around… Uh. Ten, or something? It wasn’t his fault the walls were so incredibly thin.
Kasper remembers the time he was fueled by distress, making an effort to knock around the complex himself so he could pass out the missing cat flyers for Poptart. The robloxian even went as far as to slide them beneath the doors of the people who didn’t answer right away. His sweet little cat couldn’t have strayed far, truly…
Sometimes, he genuinely suspected Unpleasant had something to do with it. Maybe he wasn’t being the most sensible, maybe he was being directed by frantic paranoia, but a deep pit always carved itself out in Kasper’s gut when he thought about the capabilities the gradient held. It was difficult for the robloxian to truly hate anyone, but ever since Unpleasant decided to make its unwanted appearance in his life, lingering around his room without asking, watching over his shoulder constantly, and messing with all of his personal belongings… Kasper was becoming more and more prone to irritation. Having your privacy constantly invaded like Two Stud Camp was never the greatest feeling, after all. Even for someone who considers himself as quite a sociable person.
If anything, the whole situation made him feel more uneasy than outraged. Even when it came to his little cases of incensed frustration, he’d find that the feelings would fade away just as quickly as they came, merging into what felt like straight-up defeat. No matter what he did, Unpleasant could walk in at any time, could phase through his personal barrier, materialize, or appear. It felt like going against a notorious no-skill hacker in your favorite video game. Ruins the experience, right?
No amount of reasoning would get through the brain of that creature. No amount of explanation could grant him a sliver of privacy. Kasper would eagerly forfeit all of his shiny elevator tickets if it meant Unpleasant would go and bother Jeremy instead of him.
Which was... A little bit bizarre. Does Unpleasant actually verbally speak with Jeremy? Sure Kasper despised the gradient's entire existence, and sure, on multiple occasions, he might've had some epic dreams of the gradient being struck by lightning or reduced to atoms, but he wondered what it would sound like if she had a voice...
Cough. Less wondering, Kasper. The only thing he's good for is ruining your day.
Sniffling like a child with a cold, he tilted his head back in an attempt to try and scout out for some speckles in the sky. To his disappointment, the luminance of the streetlights combined with the city smog formed a dense blanket over the possibility of seeing any stars. What a fail. Kasper loved the stars.
He looked back down and continued on, traversing the thoughts of his restless mind as if they represented some sort of vexing labyrinth.
Kasper persistently preferred to view himself as a friend to all. Sure, his friends sometimes pestered him for his sickly tendencies because he never truly bothered to take… Well, the proper precautions. Ever the careless one, he simply viewed his sickness as a prominent part of him. Sure, he was constantly plagued by headaches and sneezes, but those initial concerns turned into mere annoyances over time.
If they were cursed with a constantly running nose, then they might be forced to learn how inconvenient it was to go through three boxes of tissues per day.
Despite being well aware that his virus was… contagious... he still traversed the elevator regularly. It wasn’t necessarily his fault though, considering his unknown illness corrupted his self-preservation, making him believe everything was always fine. Turning him into an upright denial machine, fully equipped with no sense of self-empathy when it came to his devastating sickness.
His illness used to be extremely unforgiving at its peak. He went by Infected because he couldn’t even remember his own name. The sickness plagued his mind and consumed his consciousness for well-being like a parasite slowly eating away at its host. It wasn’t until a few NPCS noticed his concerning lack of presence... his new habitual tendency to stay boarded up in his own apartment room as he battled against his own tarnished mind... that DrRETRO finally managed to find a break in his case— A partial cure. It was the ultimate game changer that allowed him to progressively remember things again.
Kasper was still forgetful, sure, and he still felt sickly and clogged nearly all of the time. Those symptoms might leech off of him forever. The fact that he may never feel one hundred percent healthy again was never off of the table... Despite that, he had the doc to thank more than anything, for giving him a chance at mere functionality again. For forcing the cure upon him, even when he outright denied it, having to have the vial of liquid forced down his throat by RETRO with the help of his friends. His virus fought and clawed against the cure, desperate for its host to resist self-consciousness.
Desperate for him to remain oblivious.
The partial cure managed to neutralize the contagious aspects of his virus, and it also improved many of his symptoms. His head didn't hurt as much and he found himself sneezing a lot less. Finally, he was not to be forced to sleepwalk through life by some brain-eating pathogen. The others saw him change for the better, saw him begin to feel better — but some still seemed to be bothered at his presence, as if he was still insanely contagious. As if he was nothing but sickness personified.
It nearly reminded Kasper of a zombie situation. Except no one wanted to be the zombie in an apocalypse flick. That was kinda lame.
He was a person before his virus, you know? Sometimes it hurt a little more than he’d like to admit…
Come on, who do they take him for? Kasper tries his best to maintain universal friendliness, to keep his cool no matter what. The previous Unpleasant situation was just one of many, and the tower was due to topple eventually. Plus, at least he doesn’t possess a craving for outright doom on the others, such as Gnarpy or Pest. Or that rock thing that gets delivered into the elevator every once in a while, being the literal personification of evil.
Here in this old alleyway, he was alone with his thoughts. Away from all the stimulation, the interactions— and the world in general. It was a bonus to his upcoming skate sesh.
Skating was by far one of his favorite activities. If Kasper were forced to choose out of them all, he’d pick the hobby with no hesitation. Sorry gaming, sorry jamming on the guitar, skating was simply one of those hobbies he would never be able to let go. He’s been doing it since he was young, and he hoped he’d be able to grind bars to his coffin.
Kasper snickered at his own slightly morbid thought. Still, what a sick way to say goodbye. Doing something you love.
Despite it initially feeling nice, several harsh gusts of wind made his nose run more excessively than usual. Sniffling it up before it managed to descend too far, he glanced forward realizing he was approaching his target destination. The old. jagged wires of a steel fence came into view, patches of plant life growing near its base. Maybe some other people will be up… It wasn’t too uncommon for tenants from the neighboring apartments to hang at his favorite skate spot late at night.
Maybe Ozzie would be there. Or Sam.
Maybe…
Thud. Thud. Thud.
Kasper abruptly stopped at the sound, startled.
Thud.
He swiveled at the unfamiliar noise. It was coming from his left. At a closer inspection, the source seemed to be a small garage door, the kind equivalent to the ones used as rentable storage compartments. A little odd. He swore that all the other times he traversed the alley, this garage was usually open and empty. After some more blanked out staring, the robloxian decided to just press his ear to the surface of the steel door, attempting to listen for any potential… living beings.
Silence…
Whatever. One of his complex neighbors was probably working on something. Sure, it would be cool to see what was up, but knocking on someone's garage door in the dead of night was probably not the best choice of action to take. Kasper was never really one to actually think out his plans, though.
Shrugging the odd feeling in his gut off, he leaned away from the door— Thud! Just to suddenly flinch back at another loud pound.
“G33z…”
Tightly clutching his board, he moved a step back to rub at his aching ear with his free hand. That sound was a lot more prominent compared to the previous ones, nearly sounding as if it was produced right against his ear. Way to go Kasper! You can never just mind your business, and here you are nearly getting irreparable ear damage because of your epic curiosities. Awesome.
That's until Kasper heard something akin to… Groaning?
Clearly, the sounds were muffled by the heavy steel door of the garage, but he was positive he wasn’t going insane. From the other side of the barrier came groans, undeniably the sound of a person in pain. A few more thuds followed, and the mixture of noises made concern brew in the depth of Kasper’s heart. Was someone attempting to get out? Was someone trapped in there?
Right. Well, Kasper didn’t necessarily want to be that guy. Y’know, the guy who walked past a potential murder victim when he had every opportunity to prevent the entire thing from happening in the first place, only being halted by the corrupted mindset that revolved around the universal phrase, “Not my problem”! Sure it was risky, and sure it was unsafe. But merely being a witness to something so potentially horrific was not on Kasper’s list of “cool morals 2 follow”.
If there was one thing Kasper valued, it was his vivid imagination. All rainbows, sparkles, and shitty media references. But curse it sometimes, because it was currently sprinting to the “worst-case-scenario” file, full force. A true double-edged sword.
Screw ‘curiousity killed the cat!’ It was satisfaction that brought it back!
…
Quickly sucking in a breath, Kasper finally prevailed over his battle of nerves and leaned down to grip the cold handle of the garage with his free hand. The touch made him realize his palm was immensely sweaty. Jeez dude, you come outside for some stress relief, and here you are, stressed beyond relief. In true Kasper style.
With a forceful nudge, he realized that the steel door was a lot heavier than he initially expected, but it wasn’t locked. Right, if this was some horror movie scenario, either he’s walking straight into a trap first to die fashion, or this killer is a complete tool. Kasper was a big fan of those gnarly slasher horrors, having binged a few of his old DVDs on his sickest days. But even he knew that most real-life killers weren't all up for flashy performances… and therefore didn't have the freedom to make devastating mistakes.
Man, this is almost as frightening as the time guest666 joined his roblox server. And 1x1x1x1. Sure… He has no proof, but it did happen. He was twelve with no recording features. He’ll swear his entire rubber duck collection on it.
With a grunt, he managed to lift the garage door open. Once it reached the halfway point, it began to retract on its own. Kasper let go of the handle, ducking slightly to peer into the dark garage—
“Wh4T— 44Ck??! 0_o”
Whatever was behind that door immediately pounced on him, hands— claws? — reaching far out, maw outstretched.
Eyes nearly bugging out of his head, Kasper immediately panicked, having not been given enough time to react. Rough, grimy hands smeared a viscid sludge onto the fabric of his shoulders, shoving him into the stiff brick of the alley wall. Ow. With neither arm available, he was forced to use the next best thing: his legs.
With all the adrenaline-fueled strength he could muster up against his attacker, he jammed his foot into their stomach, successfully kicking them off. Apparently, it was hard enough to momentarily disorientate them, thankfully providing the robloxian with a window of opportunity as he desperately looked around for anything he could use at his disposal. Anything.
No weapon, no weapon, no weapon— what can I use? What can I use?!
Oh.
The true dedicated skater he was, Kasper was still clutching his skateboard in a furious death grip. Realizing that he couldn’t afford to hesitate, he lifted the board, fiercely grasping the bottom sides with both of his hands. He swung it hard, fast, the butt of the board colliding into the head of his attacker with a sickening crack. Kasper winced at the sound as the attacker tumbled to the ground, rag-dolling into a heap of its own disturbingly contortioned limbs.
It took a moment for the robloxian to process what had just gone down until he felt something slowly drip from his face. Lifting his forearm to wipe away his vile snot, it wasn’t until he pulled back that he realized the substance staining his arm wasn’t snot at all.
It was stained a dark color, clearly contrasting with the vibrant tone of his skin. Now horrified at the prospect of it being blood, he peered closer.
It almost appeared … dark green? In an attempt to classify the substance, he made the impulsive effort to smell it– Only to remember his nose was completely clogged up. Horrified, he finally lowered his head to ogle down at his attacker, wondering if he just committed first-degree murder on the way to his stress relief spot.
There was something was off about his so-called “attacker”. Really, really off.
Its clothes were roughly tattered, and its skin was a dark grey, blotched with cruel-looking clusters of boils and blisters. Surely his skateboard wasn’t capable enough to do so much damage? Its head was currently split open, chunks of mucus green oozing from the newly formed crevice. Kasper’s bilious stomach lurched, and he wondered deeply for the third time today if he was truly losing it.
Was this…
The being on the floor twitched and sputtered.
Was this thing seriously a…
With its mouth now opened, it bared its stained canines from a row of black gums, growling at him. Its eyes opened to peer up at him from a split head.
White, lifeless eyes.
Zombie?!
So much for chill alleyways. Hesitation begone. Kasper’s heart pumped in horror as the zombie reached for his ankle with its bruised hand, and before Kasper knew it he had forcefully kicked it in its face. He quickly lifted his foot and slammed it down, harshly digging the heel of his shoe into the cranium of the creature’s head. Like a rotting pumpkin, it caved in quickly, puss spewing from the origins. The action made Kasper gag and swallow down his own bile. No amount of those unwanted reddit gore galore posts compared to this.
Wicked Nightmare. This had 2 be a wicked nightmare!
Adrenaline currently at its peak, Kasper decided that he had done enough fighting for now. He was getting out of here, out of this place instantly. The only true escape? It had to be the elevator.
Holy shit this is happening. Didn’t he just make a zombie comparison a good… five minutes ago?? Questions, questions, so many questions… They're going to have to wait until later!
Pivoting quickly, the robloxian sprinted down the path he came. He could spend his time thanking his past-self for actually skating daily later, for now he’d put his impressive stamina to use. His right foot felt more slippery, currently covered in the brain matter of the undead for all he knew. He darted past the main corner, the rusty dumpster near his balcony coming into view.
Mustering all the remnants of his remaining strength, the robloxian managed to quickly pull himself up the first ladder one-handed. With haste, he threw his skateboard up and over the brick wall before using both hands to pull himself up the second ladder, wet foot nearly slipping on the last bar.
Out of breath, he quickly peered over the edge of the wall. The zombie wasn't in sight yet, but there was no telling if it would get back up anytime soon, despite the seemingly irreparable damage inflicted on its head. If anything, a headless zombie wouldn’t be much of a shock. Kasper would know from all of those low-quality FPS zombie games he played when he was younger.
It was the ultimate zombie diversity.
They had zombie runners. Zombie gunners. Puking zombies, soldier zombies, baby zombies. Boomers, Hunters, Smokers, Chargers, Tanks… Zombie dogs… Zombie frogs…
Okay now he was losing it. Not the time for zombie rhymes, dude.
The robloxian leaned down, hastily snatching up his blood-stained board, and quickly forced the balcony door open. He ruthlessly slammed it shut, locking it before desperately scanning the surroundings of his dimly lit room. Seriously, a zombie survival kit would be realll handy right about now, but unfortunately, he was never that paranoid in life. Bive would probably be stacked with all the necessities for this situation, but would he even make it long enough to tell her the tale? There was nothing worth taking from his own room, and all of his weapons were currently at Poob’s apartment. (What? They asked to borrow them, Kasper wasn’t going to question it)!
Well maybe if he took…
Bang!
He jumped and spun around, startled by the sound of pounding on the glass behind him. To his alarm, his previous assumptions were right. Smearing its putrid blood all over the door was the zombie. Well, around three-fourths of it. It had no head on its shoulders. Clearly, these weren’t the mindless NPCS he tackled in the digital world, considering this thing managed to scale two ladders with nothing but a body. It would be quite an impressive feat if he wasn’t so frightened and confused. Its hands were grasping around the material of the glass as if it were looking for the handle, and Kasper internally prayed that the lock would hold.
He didn’t boost his hopes up too much, considering Unpleasant broke it a few weeks back.
“H0ly ####### #### ##### th1S caNn0t B3 R34l…!!!”
Alright, so there was no time for packing! Just bringing his skateboard and bag would have to suffice. Peace out, room 007. Peace out beloved collectibles and trinkets that have been collecting dust for the past few years. Goodbye sweet sweet gaming setup, goodbye my epic guitar… Till we meet again!
Kasper bolted to his already-opened apartment door, quickly slamming it shut behind him. Turning his head, he was met with the sight of nothing out of the ordinary just yet — only the ominous hallway to his complex that stretched on. The power must have gone out in the complex entirely. That explains his screen flickering from earlier.
Seriously, was no one else up to notice?
With his mind completely set on reaching the elevator, he darted down the corridor. Kasper turned the corner to reach room 004 and—
“..!!!”
“00f– DuD3?! >:# ”
Collided straight into Unpleasant. Jeez, can a robloxian catch a break anytime soon?!
Kasper rubbed at his lip with a groan, the bars of his snakebites having jammed into his teeth from the random collision. As he processed the developing ache, he blinked a few times with watery eyes. It was only after a small pause that he realized that he was just currently fleeing from a full-on zombie, and he abrasively pushed past Unpleasant, making a beeline to the elevator. The lights of the door were completely off which already wasn’t a great sign.
Please please please work… Come on, you lame old thing!!! Kasper repeatedly jammed his pointer finger into the up button, snapping glances behind his shoulder every once in a while.
The ominous thumps emerging did nothing but fuel a plethora of tragic images into his vivid imagination.
Unpleasant was still standing in the midst of the elevator lobby, unsurprisingly as clueless as ever. The gradient gazed at Kasper with an expressionless face, curiously tilting their head. Yeah, her existence was utterly aggravating sometimes. Maybe Kasper could use him as zombie bait if it came down to it.
He could simply pin it as a noble sacrifice. Oh, the tragedy! Unpleasant met an untimely fate, risking his life for his (I d1dnt c0ns3nT t0 Th1S?) roommate Kasper!
There were just two issues with that excuse. One, the word noble should never be used to describe Unpleasant in any way, and two, at this point, he’s going to be reduced to brain food as well. Plus, pushing someone in front of a zombie just to die right after wouldn't look very great on his afterlife resume.
What happened to your “cool morals 2 follow”, man?
Focus Kasper, focus for a single second. Please.
In all seriousness, repeatedly jamming the button seemed to be nothing short of ineffective. To make matters even worse, he winced when something squishy struck and bounced off the back of his head.
“Wh4T— DUd3,” he swiveled around, having already known that it was the dumb glaggle stress toy Unpleasant snatched from his desk earlier. The robloxian stormed over, gripping the gradient by his shoulders as he shook him back and forth.
“D0. Y0U. M1Nd . Br4H?? Z0mB1eZ UnpL3As4Nt, Th3Res Z0Mb1EZ 0n th31R W4Y!!! >:/”
“...” the gradient shrugged.
“Y0u D0n’t Und3rStand! 1F th3Re’s 0Ne z0mB1E, th3Res 4 SuR3 t0 b3 A h0RD3 0F th3M N3@RbY!!!1”
“...” another shrug.
“UgHHhhH Y0U Ar3 Th3 B4N3 0F mY Ex1StNC3!!! 0F cOuR53 Y0U w0ULDN’t UND3RST4nD G4M3 L0G1c...” Kasper hissed at her. “StAY H3RE 4 All 1 CARE!1”
Letting go of the gradient to turn back towards the elevator, the robloxian could barely make a fourth of a 180. The dreadful sound of something approaching them emerged from the darkness.
Both of them froze. Kasper swung around, straining his ears to hear better. “0H m4N, 0H m4n 0h m4N UNpl3ASAnt … S0meth1ng w1ck3D C0M3s th1$ W4Y… W3Re G0nnA D13… :,D”10 points dude. Nice reference.
Again? Really? Focus!
The lazy trudging seemed to only get closer, the moaning and groaning confirming the robloxian’s initial fear. Theres more.
Zombies? Sure, this was something Kasper imagined late into the night, as he lay strewn about on his tattered couch staring at the cracks in his ceiling. Everyone has done it before, right? Conjured up the good ol’ scenario where a horrid zombie virus breaks out, applying some sort of unrealistic heroic features to themselves as if they’d actually be able to survive such a reality. Slaying zombies with friends, living in a post-apocalyptic world. But here it was, the possibility of it actually happening displayed right before his eyes, and Kasper wished for nothing more than to go back in time twenty minutes ago.
He wasn’t heroic. He was just… Kasper. A guy who liked to skate and play video games. A guy who liked to laugh at stupid media and draw crappy MLG memes on his laggy computer. A guy who owned a whole shelf of MLP figures. What did he have against the zombie apocalypse?
He’d take Fizz-Up computer spills over this any day.
He darted towards the panel, slamming the button harder. Finally, the yellow lights lit up. Alright, so it wasn’t a total dud. Great. Fantastic. Relief. Still, it wasn’t opened, so he spammed the button faster than his left-click slingshot spamming on any form of classic PVP.
“C0m3 0n c0m3 0n!! 1 alr3ady hav3 0n3 v1rus …1 d0n’t n33d an0th3r… ”
Suddenly there was a loud bang. Swiveling his head, Kasper’s eyes widened significantly at the sight. A hunched form stood in the corridor, obscured by heavy shadows. Unpleasant simply watched, their back facing Kasper as he observed the creature. The full silhouette of the figure indicated that this wasn’t the zombie Kasper KO’d before. It had a head.
Kasper turned to the panel, then turned back towards Unpleasant.
“#### my l1Fe, juSt Gr34T!!! >x(” He slowly left his secure position behind the gradient and hesitantly made his way to approach her.
The robloxian wasn’t a hero… But like he said earlier… It’s not like he craved doom.
Kasper mumbled. “AS MuCH AS 1 W1SH y0UD jUsT D1E, Th3 Z0mb1E B4It th1Ng S33Ms a L0t L3ss App3Al1ng 1F itS go1Ng 2 Happ3N r1Ght 1N fr0Nt 0f My F4ce… B(”
Plus… Jeremy would probably murder him. That’s genuinely the only reason why he’s doing this.
Unpleasant didn't move a muscle, remaining as still as usual. It watched the approaching figure with curiosity in its eyes.
Still, thank Builderman the zombie was slow. The closer it got, the more easily Kasper was able to make out its disgusting features. Sunken eyes and a torn jaw, this one was slightly different than the last, now bearing greenish skin. The zombie reared slightly as if it was preparing to lunge. Kasper pulled his board back, prepared to bash some brains in… but before he could step forward —
Unpleasant had lunged first.
Kasper stared, mouth agape as the gradient went straight for the zombie's neck, its sharp teeth latching onto its jugular as if it were some sort of rabid pitbull. The zombie shrieked and clawed at her hair, attempting to bite off Unpleasant’s ear, and the robloxian managed to snap out of his temporary shock.
Bringing his board back down he ran forward, grabbing onto Unplesant’s right shoulder, and then promptly shoved the end of his board into the zombie's chest with as much force he could muster.
It was only until he opened his eyes that he realized he had shoved the zombie so hard that it fell backward to the ground, causing its esophagus to rip out clean.
Shit, gravity is ruthless.
Ach13v3 Z0mb1E K1LL3R wasn't on your to-do list for today, bro!
With a slow turn of his head, Kasper grimaced at the sight: Unpleasant simply chewing on the organ like a dog with a toy, before spitting it out to the ground. It splattered against the wooden floor like a wet fish, and the gradient simply stared at the zombie writhing below as if he wanted to taste some more.
Considering Unpleasant had zombie blood over its mouth, it would probably be safe to assume he would succumb to the infection. But also considering… well… it was Unpleasant … The chances of that happening seemed extremely unlikely.
Kasper winced at the sight, eyeing the zombie as it reached to claw at its own throat, unable to produce any sounds. The once tan walls of the hallway were now splattered with rotten blood, the substance languidly dripping down.
Kasper sneezed into his arm, and for once thanked the fact that his clogged nose was currently blocking out the supposedly putrid smell of zombie blood from entering his receptors.
Gnarly.
Both of their heads snapped up at the sound of more banging, more footsteps. There was definitely more than one. Unpleasant’s single set of teeth and Kasper’s bloodied board were not going to cut it. Quickly, Kasper ran back towards the button to continue to spam it with his free hand. He heard the gradient follow.
“C0m3 0n c0me 0n c0m3 … Dud3, C4Nt Y0U Ju5T D3Mat3R1Al1z3 0r S0m3Th1Ng?!?” Kasper frantically questioned Unpleasant, not daring to peer back into the hall. It seemed the gradient was too busy staring at the corridor to respond.
Not like it would respond under any circumstance anyway…
A symphony of thuds and concerning sounds echoed in the distance.
“0h C0me 0N Y0u DuMb ######!!! D,X ”
Ding!
Eyes widening at the sound, the robloxian forced his gaze up. The arrow indication was now glowing, and the doors were rumbling open.
Nearly feeling betrayed by his own unexplainable actions, Kasper forcefully leaned down to grasp the gradient’s wrist, harshly pulling her into the elevator.
For the third time today, he collided with the form of some poor passerby who just so happened to be in the wrong place at the wrong time.
Groaning, he looked to see who the unfortunate victim was.
####. No way.
Out of everyone, it had to be Lampert?!