Chapter Text
You’re late.
seven whole days, one week on the dot.
When the first two days passed, you had not even noticed, initially forgetting the monthly routine. Days three and four is when you finally detected its absence, though you had brushed it off as normal. Sometimes your period lagged behind a bit, nothing to worry about. Although as day five came and went with still no signs of a break through alarm bells slowly started ringing, never had it been quite this late before. By the time six and seven rolled around you had been continuously pacing back to the bathroom every hour to check. Though each time with no luck, not even a spot.
As the following Monday peaked and the daylight burned you had deduced yourself to the confines of your bed, stomach twisting in anxious knots. Wadded up under layers of blankets your mind spiraled, too deep in thought to care of the wasted time.
'How could this happen? How could I have been so careless?' Shaking away the disastrous thoughts your more sensical side tried to rationalize the situation. 'Maybe it’s just a fluke. The stress from work, all the hours on patrol and the office has caused this. That can happen right?'
With extensive google searches and online chat forms dating years back, read up and down, front to back, it was true that stress could delay a cycle for a couple days, sometimes even weeks. Sighing in relief you tossed the silly notion of it being anything more aside.
'See nothing to worry about.'
Though, as much as you wanted to believe that it was simply stress you knew, deep down inside, that it was a lie. As one week became two and two became almost a month with still no sign of menstruation followed by an increase in alarming symptoms; the false narrative you told yourself to try and keep the truth at bay, crumbled.
The person who knows you better than anyone else is yourself, you know your body inside and out and right now, things did not feel right.
Already clued in as to what this enigma was, there was only one way to know for sure.
In baggy sweatpants and an oversized hoodie, you braved the streets in a haze. Unable to focus on much of anything around you, the never ending loop of what if’s clouded your mind. A villain could have been ransacking the neighborhood and you still would not have taken notice.
'What if it's positive? What am I going to do? What can I do?'
“That’ll be 800 yen”
Taking your card out after several beeps of the machine as you paid, not bothering a second glance to the woman behind the counter for surely, she wore a look of disapproval, you raced back to the comfort of your home.
Sliding down to the tiled floor test in hand, you could deny it no longer. The unyielding evidence on the plastic stick sealed your fate. No amount of shaking or lighting would cause the dreaded two pink lines to magically disappear. A cold sweat slid down your forehead with a shiver of realization.
You were pregnant.
And you knew exactly who the father was.
You loved Toshinori Yagi, truly you did.
Yet the thought of carrying his child terrified you.
The two of you had been seeing each other in secret for over two years. However, given the steady surge in crime over the last half year your relationship had become rocky. Though you may live under the same roof, and sleep in the same bed, your time together was few and far between. As the world's Symbol of Peace his schedule was slammed, not that yours was much better being a hero yourself, and a gap where time allowed for each other dwindled with every new wanna be villain and gang.
When could you tell him? When at this point you did not even know the next time you would see him again. Though the better question was how you would tell him.
Neither of you had ever acknowledged the thought of children, in fact you barely spoke of the future as a whole. The word 'marriage' seemed outlandishly farfetched, not even entering the orbit of possibilities. If his identity was ever compromised or a villain caught wind of All Might having a wife...
The consequences could be catastrophic for both of you.
Your relationship with him as a whole was a gamble on safety even if you both excelled in being pro's. Adding legally binding proof only added fuel to the fire, and now with the thought of a walking talking embodiment of your affair on the way...
"Fuck."
Wadding up the flimsy plastic wrapper with a deep breath you eyed the tester for one final look at fates cruel punishment before stuffing it back into the box.
You could not bear to look at it any longer.
Inside the same plastic bag it was purchased in along with any evidence of what you just discovered lay at the bottom of a dumpster two blocks away from your house.
You could not tell him.
Not now.
When the time was right you would... just have to find it.
Yet the longer you wait the harder the truth will sting.
Times ticking, you need to make a decision.
“How cute” You cooed at the television; the screen showed a baby happily babbling while swinging the commercials star product within its hands. Its chubby cheeks and puffy lips made your heart melt. Looking over to your partner who sat at the kitchen table hoping to find a similar look of splendor you were instead met with the backside of his unkempt blonde tresses. Unfazed by your comment the cell phone held within his hands garnered all his attention. Thinning fingered rapidly typing with blonde eyebrows knitted in concentration.
Long after the commercial had ended and the news broadcast commencing once more had he at last looked to you.
"What was that?"
"Oh nothing, sorry." Nodding his attention once again fell back into the depths of his device. Deducing that this was a bad time you brushed off the first attempt.
'He seems busy.'
Holding the most recent newspaper in hand you ran up to Yagi as he entered the threshold of your shared home, a smile on your face.
“Look at this!” Depicted was a photo from All Might’s busy weekend. He had a public meeting on Friday where he addressed the grand opening of a new park in his name. Several small children clung to his legs and arms, some even tried to climb his muscular shoulders or hung off his hulking biceps. “Kids really do love you!” You laughed, a light blush lighting up your face.
“They do.” Short in his reply Toshinori shrugged off his outer coat and dropped his briefcase with a heavy thunk before walking past you, eyes never dropping to the paper within your hands and plopped down on the couch. Sighing his eyes closed and head slumped over the sofas ridge. Deep purple lined the bottom of his sunken sockets in pure exhaustion, he had just returned from a days' worth of patrol. Sensing his disinterest in conversation but driven by a need for honesty you took a daring step towards him.
“What do you think of them?” You said softly, fingers crinkling the paper beneath them in anticipation.
‘Say something, anything, about children. About how you like them and enjoy being around them. That you... want one... Maybe, maybe you could take our child to that park. Push them on the swings! Help them climb the jungle gym!’ Your mind subconsciously begged him to repeat any of those sentiments as false images of both the thinner and mighty version of himself ran around with a similar looking child flashing through. The smile upon your lips widened with each fleeting hope.
His shoulders gave a pathetic shrug, “I love my fans.”
As quickly as your imagination grew it was stomped out like a pesky weed.
Your heart sunk, swelling with sorrow, and wanting to burst.
“Right.”
'He's too tired to understand right now...' Wadding the newspaper up you retreated back.
'I'll try again later'
Finally finding a point in time where both of you were off was cause for celebration.
Calling your shared tried and true sit-down restaurant, The Mont, you happily booked a table for two.
Tonight was the night.
Come what may, you would tell him the truth no matter what tonight.
Calling his cell phone, you were met with his automatize voicemail box, though you thought nothing of it as it's to be expected for this time of day. Either in meetings, interviews or patrolling he would surely call you back once finished.
As the answering machine beeps you leave a short message. Telling him that you would be waiting for him at the restaurant at six and had something important to discuss.
With a final goodbye you hung up.
'It's now or never, he needs to know.'
Trying once more half an hour before six as he had yet to call back, again you were met with the unresponsive beep.
'Relax, he'll be there.'
Pushing the ever-growing panic down with a heavy sigh and a couple nervous swipes to flatten the none existing wrinkles of your skirt, you entered the restaurant.
Greeted by the hostess with a warm smile you were happily led to your table.
Trying not to let the drop of your stomach become noticeable at finding the table hauntingly empty you instead focused on the serene dinning environment.
A lit candle nestled in a small nest of faux flowers atop a lace tablecloth sat in the middle. Adding sensual lighting to the otherwise darkened environment. Smells of freshly cooked meats and exquisite wine filled the air.
Dozens of other couples sat around the bustling dining area. Glancing at a few of their love drunk gazes you envied the way their hands intertwined, laughs melded together, and their pure blissful happiness seemed endless.
No stress or electronic barrier separated them.
You could not help the sense of melancholy and longing that came with looking.
Sighing you fidgeted with the bow laced around your silverware,
'Toshi will be here soon.'
But as the minutes melded into an hour, and the growingly apathetic waitress made her fifth pass at your table your heart sunk into painfully ragged beats against your chest.
“Ma’am, are you ready to order?” Her smile left much to be desired, from its once widespread across her face when she'd initially brought you a glass of water to one sided her obviously growing frustration clashed with your own inner turmoil.
“No not yet, thank you.” With your voice barely above a whisper, gaze unable to meet hers and your own attempt at a smile falling flat she remained silent. Looking to you for a few seconds before nodding and heading off to her other tables.
She knew what you refused to accept.
You have been stood up.
Feeling embarrassed, dejected and an overflowing sense of resentment as the helpless pregnant woman with the no-show date the once sultry atmosphere felt suffocating.
Getting up from your table you left a few bills before dashing to the restroom.
Pushing a stall open and heaving yourself down onto the closed seat you felt yourself breaking. Despite your strict moto of never allowing yourself to cry in such a public place the hot tears rimming the corners of your eyes and cascading down your cheek free flowed. With a hand clamped tightly over your mouth you tried to piece yourself back together yet the sobs would cease. Whimpers and shaky breaths echoed off the heavily decorated walls amplifying your humiliation.
You’re a hero.
You're not supposed to act like this.
It’s disgraceful.
But God does it hurt.
Running cold water onto a paper towel you attempted to dab away the running black streaks of mascara from under your eyes and compose yourself.
The woman that looked back at you felt unrecognizable.
Who was she?
The once strong willed, fearless protector of the people and upholder of justice was no where to be found.
A sad broken shell of who you used to be is all that remains.
Trailing a hand down from the apples of your cheeks to your neck and down the soon to be swollen curve of your breasts you find yourself fondling the indiscernible bump of your stomach through the thin material of your dress.
Though far too early to be showing, you knew.
They’re there with you.
You were not alone.
Not anymore.
And never would be again.
Toshinori apologized for missing dinner via text a few hours later.
There had been an attack in a neighboring city that called for his attention. He would be spending the night at Might Tower to help with reports and the investigation.
Try as you might, despite breaking down, you could not stay mad, the world needed him.
But that didn’t take away the deep rooted pain in your soul.
Returning from a long day of patrolling the bustling city streets you’re greeted with a silent house.
Not surprised by the lack of life, Yagi was probably out on patrol himself or perhaps at the office.
Today had been rough, you kept finding yourself zoning out. Head foggy, like any and all thoughts were muddled behind a thick layer of fog.
It cost you a few nasty bruises from embarrassingly weak criminals.
God, and the constant feeling of vertigo had you gagging up anything you tried to put down.
You felt miserable.
Sighing you opened a cabinet, your auto pilot kicked in and the fog took hold. A million possibilities of the future, a million thoughts.
Your mouth felt dry and your stomach so bottomless empty.
However, as soon as a tart liquid hit your lips and the stinging smell of alcohol slipped into your nose your brain snapped back to reality. Spitting the drink back into the glass you stared down, in one hand was a wine glass in the other was the bottle.
‘What the hell am I doing?’
Intricately etched music notes covered the stemware. Toshinori had bought you this on your one year anniversary, memories of that candle lit dinner brought a smile to your face. Swirling the liquid around you felt a dark cloud loom over, memories of your heartbreak in that same restaurant bathroom had your fist clenching around the stem until your knuckles turned white. The happiness felt from the memories had been spoiled.
The nights of blinding romance and fever had vanished long ago, he did not have time for even a simple dinner with you anymore let alone a child. You were a fool for thinking that he’d possibly want this. That this was even remotely possible.
What of his reputation?
What of yours?
If the media found out you’d be drug through the mud. You’d be dubbed a whore and this baby growing within your womb a bastard. All Might’s squeaky-clean reputation as the world's god sent hero would be tarnished.
A memory from the night Toshinori told you about his late master Nana and her struggles with balancing her family and heroic life reverberated over and over in your mind. As much as you tried to convince yourself things were different, the overwhelming truth could not be ignored.
She gave up her child.
Her family.
She knew that it was not plausible to raise a child in this line of work.
The glass flew along with the bottle, shattering against the wooden cabinet sending shards of glass and Gaja Barbaresco spraying across the kitchen. The cabinet door dared to have the audacity to creek open from the force. You slammed it shut, again, the inertia swung it open.
“Fuck!” you shouted enraged you slammed the cabinetry. Over and over the wood groaned in protest, the room echoed with sharp bangs, and the wall behind rattled. Toshi’s antique whiskey tumblers, countless commemorative shot glasses and your own collection of decorative stemware fell from the shelves, shattering against your attack adding to the growing pile. It did not matter. Nothing at this point did.
He would never want a child with you.
Both fists gripped the wooden panel and ripped it clean off the hinges. Slamming it down on the counter top you raised it to repeat the action but stopped mid swing, dropping it instantly. Your breath was heavy with exhaustion.
Looking down at your hands red wine mixed blood dripped and tiny shards of glass poked out from your palm.
Uncontrollable sobs had you falling onto the wet floor, knees tucked to your chest and hands wrapped around them. Curling into yourself you felt the world around you fade away.
No longer restrained from the public eye you fully broke down.
You wanted to disappear, to shrivel up into a little ball and…
That’s it,
You had to leave.
Leave it all behind…
If only you could go back,