Dixon's girl

by monachar

Summary:

Beth Anne Greene was fifteen years old when the Dixons showed up in the city in which she went to school. Thankfully she lived at the outskirts, her farm being in the driving distance from the city center. It meant that although the Dixons were a huge problem for the families of almost all of her friends, Beth stayed out of the biker’s way. For over two years.
Then something happened.
Sophia Peletier went missing. Beth, as everyone else, joined the search, and as she was walking through the woods, her foot got caught in a snare. That's when she met Daryl Dixon for the first time and from that moment on... everything changed.

Or Beth falls in love with a much older biker and one of the most feared men in town.
A coming of age kind of fic that's been sitting on my disk for too long.

Notes:

Alright, so here you go - It's a slow burn, I'm afraid, so you'll have to wait a little for smut.

I'm not a native speaker and I don't have a beta reader. Sorry.
But I went back and edited the chapters again, so hopefully, there aren’t many mistakes left.

*

When thirteen-year-old Sophia Peletier goes missing, seventeen-year-old Beth Greene joins the search party and unexpectedly crosses paths with one of the feared bikers the whole town is terrified of. Finding herself alone in the woods with one Daryl Dixon wasn't on Beth's bingo list, but she can't help but be fascinated by this rough, brooding man with the bluest eyes she's ever seen, dreamy arms and husky, but gentle voice. Where will that lead her?

Chapter 1: Ain’t no damn hero

Beth Anne Greene was fifteen years old when the Dixons showed up in the city where she went to school. Thankfully, she lived on the outskirts, her farm being within driving distance of the city center. It meant that although the Dixons were a huge problem for the families of almost all of her friends, Beth stayed out of the bikers’ way. It also meant that the youngest Greene girl had no idea how they looked or even how old they were—just that they were dirty, rude, and dangerous. Of course, living in a small community like hers, and with friends who thrived on gossip, it was impossible to avoid hearing about them.

Most of the so-called “Dixon facts” were just gossip that no one could prove, but everyone believed them anyway. However, Beth wasn’t one for believing everything she heard, and it wasn’t like she was interested in them anyway. Actually, the girl found it strange that her friends would take the time to talk about the good-for-nothing bikers who had no respect for anyone. If Beth had her way, she would completely ignore the existence of such people. The girl had never understood the fascination most people had with evil. For her, it was the good ones who were worth talking about, not the bad. Much to Beth’s displeasure, though, if someone asked, she would have no problem remembering all of the things she’d heard about the Dixon brothers.

Once, she eavesdropped on Maggie asking their daddy about them, and that’s when she heard the story about how they came to the city to visit their uncle and stayed for good. Then there was another time when she heard Cordelia’s mom talking about some woman who got pregnant by one of the Dixons. When she told him about the baby, he gave her a knife, threw her out in the middle of the night, and told her to get rid of it and get lost. That woman tried to take the baby out with that knife the same night and ended up in the hospital where Cordelia’s mom worked the night shift. The story wasn’t told by the Dixon woman, though. She died that night, and nobody would have known how Dixon treated her if he hadn’t informed the police himself. At least, that’s how the story went, and those were the stories Beth believed.

There were also others. Many, many others. Stories about the Dixon brothers treating women like crap, beating people to death, selling crystal to school kids, selling guns to the mafia, murdering people who came in their way, and torturing those who betrayed their club. But that was only gossip. There was no proof for any of it, so the Dixons stayed in the city, free to do as they wished. People feared them, hated them, and excluded them from all the local activities—which the brothers wouldn’t want to take part in anyway—but nothing else could be done.

Everybody knew about them. However, for Beth, the Dixons were only a terrifying story, a myth told purposely to make others more alert. Then, eight months after Beth turned seventeen, Sophia Peletier, a thirteen-year-old daughter of Carol and Ed, went to school, took her usual way through the woods, and never came back. On the same evening, their community organized a search party. Obviously, Beth’s family joined in, and so did the youngest Greene. It was there, in the middle of the woods, that she met Daryl Dixon for the first time—and what a meeting it was.

It was a dark, windy night, and the forest was lit only by flashlights. They had been searching for a few hours already with no result, and Beth was getting tired. Of course, she wouldn’t tell that to anyone, wouldn’t even think of voicing her tiredness when there was a sweet, poor girl missing. However, Beth didn’t get much sleep the night before, the day in school was long, her cheerleader training after classes exhausting, and she was just feeling low after so many hours of walking around the forest.

To be completely honest, the blonde girl didn’t even notice she was slowing down to the point where she was walking behind everyone. That’s when she heard someone screaming, not too far away from the bushes on her left. It wouldn’t have been that weird to hear someone when so many people were walking around and calling out for Sophia, but this was a different kind of scream. One that sent shivers up her spine and made goosebumps appear on her skin.

Beth turned toward the sound quickly and, just like a loser she was, silently called out:

“Sophia? Are you there?”

There was no answer, but she heard the scream again, and without another thought, she dove into the forest. The first time Beth heard it, she thought it was somewhere nearby and that the source wouldn’t be hard to find. But as she started running, she realized that following a sound coming from behind so many trees could be tricky. What the seventeen-year-old realized next was that it could be dangerous too. Sharp pain shot through her foot, and when Hershel’s daughter took another step, something pulled her back. It all happened so fast that the teenager hardly registered what had transpired.

If Beth had made any sound while falling, she didn’t remember it later. All she recalled was falling face-first into the ground, scratching her hands and knees. Perhaps she did cry out after all, because just a few seconds later, a well-built man with huge, muscular arms appeared out of nowhere and knelt beside her.

“Here. Let me.” A gruff, breathy voice came, and Beth involuntarily cringed. Her flashlight had fallen out of her hands when she hit the ground and switched off, so she could hardly see the stranger’s face. It made her feel insecure and nervous. Her mind “helpfully” reminded her that a girl had gone missing on this very day. And although it was the worst-case scenario, there was a possibility that Sophia had been kidnapped, raped, or murdered by someone somewhere in this area. So it was understandable that being left alone with a man she didn’t recognize—someone she was sure wasn’t part of the search party—scared her to the point where she had to resist calling out for help. Beth was just seconds away from doing exactly that when he finally freed her foot from the snare. Her foot throbbed with pain, but she tried to ignore the wetness in her eyes or the way her throat closed, making it hard to breathe.

“Damn, girl. So many paths in here, and you had to take this one,” the man commented suddenly, making her cringe again at the deep, hoarse timbre of his voice. Even in the dark, she could see him shaking his head at her as if he thought it was all her fault.

Later, when Beth thought about this moment, she wasn’t sure what had kept her from standing up and trying to run away from the stranger. Instead, Beth just sat there looking up at him, searching his face in the dark like the stupid teenage girl she was.

“I heard someone screaming and wanted to help them. I didn’t think it would be so dangerous to run through the woods,” Beth explained in a tight voice, using all her willpower not to shiver under the measuring look he gave her. It seemed so intimate to sit here in the dark with him. And even though there was plenty of space, Beth felt as if the forest were closing in on them. It felt as if the man were caging her with his monstrous shoulders. He’s way too close, Beth thought to herself, knowing perfectly well that it wasn’t true. The man kept his distance. It was only her imagination.

All Beth got in response was a silent grunt confirming that he’d heard her, but nothing more.

The man stood up then and reached out to help her do the same.

“Come on. Let’s see if you can walk.”

Beth took his hand, ignoring the warmth that spread through her when their skin touched, and let him help her stand.

As soon as Beth found her balance, she let go of him—a huge mistake. When she put weight on her left foot and tried walking, pain shot through it again, and the man had to save her from falling once more.

Beth groaned softly, not even attempting to protest when the stranger gripped her under the arm and helped her lean on him for support.

“I don’t think I can do it. I’m sorry,” she said in a shaky voice, feeling more exhausted than ever, the throbbing in her foot making her dizzy. The warmth radiating from the stranger’s body didn’t energize her; if anything, it made her want to collapse and sleep right there, which was at least mildly concerning. She knew nothing about this man. For all she knew, he could be a psychopathic serial killer. That thought compelled her to speak: “My parents are somewhere in here. If you could just…”

Before she could finish, a scream rang out through the forest—different from the earlier ones. This one was louder, raw, and filled with anguish. It sounded as though someone’s heart was being ripped out of their chest. The sound made Beth shiver with fear. She looked up to see the man staring in the direction he likely thought the sound came from. His tense expression suggested he was considering what to do.

“Just go,” Beth said, though the idea of being left alone terrified her. It wasn’t that she suddenly trusted him, but he hadn’t hurt her so far. He’d done everything he could to help her, and unless he planned to take her somewhere else to kill her, he seemed like a decent person. Of course, her vivid imagination suggested there could still be a real psychopathic serial killer hiding among the trees. Staying with the stranger was probably safer—he could help her walk and get back to her family. But Beth wouldn’t be Beth if she didn’t care about others before herself. The man turned to her, and though it was dark, she could sense his questioning gaze. She added, “That person needs help more than I do.”

The scream echoed again, and Beth couldn’t tell if it was the sound or her words that convinced him. He nodded in the dark, then carefully extracted himself from her grip, moving slowly enough for her to adjust her footing without falling again. She was already planning her next move when his rough, smoky voice broke through the silence.

“Come on, then. Hop on.”

Beth furrowed her brow, blinking a few times before realizing he was crouched down, waiting for her to climb onto his back.

“Are you serious?”

“Yeah, it’s a serious piggyback. Jump up, girl. I ain’t leavin’ you here.”

So, she climbed onto his back, noticing for the first time the badass crossbow now resting on his chest instead of slung over his shoulder.

God, her father won’t be happy about this, Beth thought briefly. Won’t be happy at all—if I even see him again. She realized she didn’t even know the man’s name, yet here she was, trusting him to carry her back to her parents. But it was too late to change her mind. To distract herself, she tried starting a conversation.

“My flashlight. Aren’t we going to use it?” she asked. But the man had already started walking, and it didn’t seem like he had any intention of going back for it. His calm, steady movements surprised her; he had no trouble navigating the woods in complete darkness.

“Don’t matter. I can see just fine,” he said softly, so softly that Beth almost missed it.

“What are you, Daredevil or somethin’?” she joked quietly, letting out a nervous laugh. The man didn’t react.

“Don’t know who you’re talkin’ ’bout, girl,” he replied, his voice still low.

“It’s a character from Marvel comics. He’s blind but has superhuman senses, and he’s a superhero.”

The man grunted, following it with an annoyed huff. “I ain’t no damn hero.”

Beth went silent, realizing it might not be the best idea to keep talking. He didn’t seem interested, and she was too tired for small talk anyway.

Yet, despite the silence, Beth found herself oddly comfortable in his presence. Sure, it felt awkward being plastered to his back, his strong hands holding her legs to keep her steady. But there was something strangely comforting about it, too.

The man smelled like no one she’d ever been close to. Most of the boys from her school smelled like cheap body spray or sweat. This man carried the heady scent of leather, wood, motor oil, cigarettes, and something earthy she couldn’t quite place. If someone had described that combination to her before, she’d have thought it sounded awful. But as she breathed it in, Beth realized she didn’t hate it. Not at all. Not even a little bit.

Soon, they reached the source of the terrifying screams—and a cluster of flashlights. It turned out they weren’t the only ones who’d been drawn to this place, and they were among the last to arrive.

The brightness of the flashlights made Beth squint and blink several times before her vision adjusted. When it did, she wished it hadn’t. Her gaze immediately landed on the source of the sound: a woman cradling a small, lifeless body in her arms, screaming in agony. Beth’s throat closed up, and tears sprang to her eyes as she clung more tightly to the stranger.

The man, for his part, didn’t say a word or even flinch as they entered the clearing. He simply stood still, carrying her weight, while the scene unfolded before them. It was as though time had frozen in this awful place, where a mother’s world had just been shattered.

“Beth!? Mom, look, it’s Beth!” Maggie’s voice cut through the chaos, louder than anything else. Beth looked up to see her sister rushing toward her, their mother close behind.

The stranger jolted into motion, carefully setting Beth down before disappearing into the crowd without a word. Beth barely had time to process it, watching as he made his way to Carol. He didn’t hesitate, dropping down beside the grieving mother and wrapping her in a firm embrace.

It was then that Beth saw his back fully illuminated by the flashlights. A tremor of dread ran through her. The leather vest with wings on the back, and the name of the club written in bold white letters, left no doubt in her mind. The Feral Angels. No wonder she hadn’t recognized him—she’d rarely seen any of them up close. When she did, they were usually speeding past on their bikes, too fast to identify.

“Bethy! Where have you been? We’ve been so worried!” Her mother pulled her into a hug. Though her tone was distressed and nearly angry, Beth could sense her relief.

“I got my foot caught in a snare, Mom. What happened here? I heard screams…” Beth trailed off, casting a quick glance toward the stranger. She didn’t want her mother—or worse, Maggie—to pick up on the fact that she’d just gotten a piggyback ride from a Feral Angel.

“Your friend Amy and her younger sister found poor Sophia,” her mom said, her voice trembling. “Her mother just saw her and got hysterical. She couldn’t wait for the police—just threw herself on Sophia…” Her voice broke slightly as she added, “She was lying there on a bed of flowers, drenched in her own blood… Poor thing. I can’t even begin to imagine the pain Carol must be feeling right now.”

Her mom pulled Beth into another tight hug, and though she sounded distressed, her relief at having Beth safe was unmistakable.

As Beth leaned into the embrace, she glanced toward Carol. Despite the gathering thinning out—some people offering condolences before retreating to their homes—Mrs. Peletier remained rooted in place. The biker, the stranger who had carried Beth, stayed too, crouched beside her, an unmoving presence of quiet solidarity.

Were they lovers? Beth wondered. Her gaze lingered on them, noting Ed Peletier’s absence. Where was he? Had anyone even told him what had happened? And why wasn’t he out here searching for his own daughter in the first place?

Her thoughts were interrupted as her dad and Shawn emerged from the woods, their faces grim and concerned.

“What happened?” her dad asked, his voice steady but strained.

Beth opened her mouth, intending to explain about Sophia, but Maggie interjected at the worst possible moment, zeroing in on something Beth would have preferred to avoid.

“Wasn’t that Daryl Dixon giving you a piggyback, Bethy?” Maggie asked, her tone light but pointed, the kind of teasing that instantly made Beth want to sink into the ground.

Chapter 2: Get lost, kid

Summary:

The one in which Daryl gets himself in trouble by following Rick to the police station and Beth bakes for him.

Notes:

Our lovely couple meets again :)
Hope you'll enjoy the second chapter as much as the first <3
Thank you for all your lovely comments, I'm so happy you liked the beginning of this story!

If someone asked him, Daryl Dixon wouldn’t be able to tell how many times he had been subjected to hateful, loathsome glances since that first time in first grade when Lizzie Thompson spat in his face and called him a dirty redneck bastard. By the time Daryl turned thirty, he had forgotten what exactly caused this proclamation of power. What he did remember, as clear as day, was her beautiful golden hair, her flowery dress, and that sweet smile that appeared on her face right after she did that. He didn’t forget how that remark made him feel either—like a small piece of shit that didn’t deserve to breathe the same air she breathed in. She told him that, too, on those few other times he accidentally stumbled upon her while making his way in or out of the classes. Lizzie wasn’t the only one making those kinds of remarks, but it was her words that hurt him the most.

Even back then, Daryl was quick to anger, quick to hate, quick to throw tantrums at anyone talking shit to him. He wasn’t as big or as strong as Merle was, but he made up for it with his temper and stubbornness. If any of those other kids had spat in his face, they would’ve ended up with their faces pressed to the ground and their arms twisted in a very uncomfortable position. But even though the youngest Dixon really wanted to hit Lizzie right in her pretty face, he quickly found out that he couldn’t. Not because he was afraid, or because he secretly liked her, or because she was the most beautiful girl he had ever seen—though back then, she was—but because hitting her would make him into his father. And the mere thought of that had paralyzed him every damn time she talked to him. To the point where he wasn’t even able to answer her.

The most infuriating thing about that, though, was that even after Lizzie moved out, he never freed himself from her. No, every place he went, every school he attended, and then every city he and Merle traveled to, there was always some Lizzie. The world seemed to be full of them. Uptight girls from good homes who would not only look at the piece of shit he was with disgust but also comment on why on earth there were no rules preventing good-for-nothing assholes like him from existing in such proximity to decent Christians like them.

Almost twenty-four years since he met his first Lizzie Thompson, Daryl thought he had already perfected the art of recognizing those women and staying the hell away from them, so it stopped being such a big issue for him. Even if he accidentally stumbled upon someone like that, he never let it go to his head. Not for too long, at least.

So Daryl didn’t think much of it when Rick asked him to go to the police station with him the night they found Sophia. He was the last person to see Sophia alive, and the case had just changed from a missing person case to a murder, so it was only reasonable that they wanted to talk to him again. And he couldn’t exactly say no to Rick now, could he? His uncle Jess expressed his fear of judgment from the city folks, but even though they both knew that Rick’s assurances that nobody was going to find out were horseshit, Daryl still went with him. Carol’s kid was dead, and Daryl would do anything to help Rick find the son of a bitch who did it.

So what if some of the housewives looked at him as if he stepped on their clean carpet with his dirty, muddy shoes? He could live through that. Or so he thought before his first trip to the shop two days after his visit to the police station. Not only did people look at him as if he had leprosy, not only did one of those lunatics spit on his boots when he was walking out of the shop, but someone made an effort to pierce all of the tires on his truck. He had to call the garage and wait for someone to come and haul him. He was actually surprised when he came back home and didn’t see any smashed windows or hateful words sprayed across its walls. Something told him it was only a matter of time.

Daryl didn’t call Rick to tell him what had transpired. He was never one for complaining. Not because he was stupid enough to think he could overcome every problem by himself or that nobody could help him, but simply because he was taught not to. He had a reminder of this lesson somewhere on his back, along with many other lessons that his father chose to instill in him so that he would always remember. The man avoided looking at his back at any cost, but it didn’t make him forget the rules. No, because the trick was not to have them bitten into his flesh. It was to have them burned into his mind. To have him react in a way that his father taught him, on impulse, subconsciously, as if it were his own doing. The trick was to have him keep those marks on his back a secret even long after Will Dixon’s death. To have him feel ashamed at the mere thought of them. To have him loathe himself, just like all of those people did. Just like his father did.

His whole next week was full of people wishing him a painful death, spitting on his shoes—they weren’t brave enough to spit in his face, perhaps too afraid of him going completely nuts and ripping their bellies open—calling the garage only to tell him that he would burn in hell for touching that girl, which didn’t really concern him in any way since he wasn’t the one answering those phone calls. At some point, the biker was just so tired of people shouting at him in the streets that he stopped going out altogether. It was the first time Daryl had the boys from the garage run errands for him. Usually, he preferred getting a job done by himself, but since his presence in the city did no good, he decided to keep a low profile for a few days.

To say that he was unhappy with how things turned out was a huge understatement. He was furious, that’s what he was. A little girl was dead, and he couldn’t even do anything—couldn’t look for the murderer himself—because suddenly he stood out too much. Still, if he hadn’t gone with Rick that night, he might have never learned all of the stuff about Sophia. Daryl could easily tell that their sheriff was in huge distress after what had transpired in the woods. There was a huge chance that after getting some rest, sleeping it off, he wouldn’t be so prone to giving him confidential information like this. Even after a week, he was still surprised that Rick had.

Daryl was so preoccupied with his thoughts that he almost missed the knocking on his front door. He straightened up on the couch where he had been slumping for the last hour.

“Yeah?” he reacted just as the doors opened and Zach’s face came into view. He looked apologetic. There was probably no one else at the garage right now who was as aware of Daryl’s situation as Zach was. It was Zach who had to deal with the phone calls every damn day, after all.

Zach walked inside but stayed right next to the door, so Daryl had to scrunch his neck a little to look at him.

“Hey, boss, sorry to bother ya, but there’s some really hot chick asking for you at the garage.”

Daryl sighed. He wasn’t in the mood to deal with anything else today, not after some lady from the news station came here to film a report from the city where a twelve-year-old girl had been brutally murdered a week ago. Obviously, they thought it would be appropriate to film it right across from Dixon’s garage, seeing as he was the only person who had been questioned by the police in relation to this event. He had to take his crossbow out and threaten them to make them leave, and even after that, he wasn’t entirely sure he wouldn’t see his damn face on the news tonight, throwing a tantrum at those people.

Nice one, Daryl. As if they didn’t already think you were a murderer. If this airs, they’re gonna think you’re fucking mental too.

Yeah? And who cares?

“Can’t you have someone else take care of her?”

Zach looked like he was completely aware of how inconvenient this was for Daryl. Not only had Daryl been bothered by the city folks every damn day since the day they found Sophia, but now he couldn’t even retreat to his own room without some chick coming over and asking for him.

“I thought of that too, but she says she’s not here to repair her car.”

“Yeah? Then she’s probably here to tell me I’m going to hell. Just tell her somebody already beat her to it, why don’t ya?”

Daryl got up from the couch and slowly walked to the fridge to take out another beer. The house was so small that the only way to have both a living room and a kitchen was to have them joined. There was no corridor either, no hall—when you entered the house, you ended up in the living room and the kitchen.

It was Jess who found out that there were uncovered grounds on their land and extended it by building this little space for the workers. Jess, who was living above the garage himself, was the one who turned this place into a small house. Any worker who needed it could spend the night in one of the two spare bedrooms or on the couch in the living room. That is, until the Dixons showed up and claimed those bedrooms for themselves.

Zach looked confounded only for a moment before replying:

“I don’t think that’s what she’s here for.”

Daryl sighed again, realizing that he would have to go back to the garage and talk to her no matter what he said to Zach. For a moment, he had the idea of sending Zach to bring her here, but he realized that probably wouldn’t be the right approach, seeing as the whole city believed him to be connected with the death of a twelve-year-old.

On the other hand, it might scare her into not bothering you anymore...

“Alright, send her over.”

“W-what? You mean like...” Daryl gave Zach a look. “Like here?”

“And where else could I possibly mean? Stop gawking and just do it.”

“Alright, whatever. Yeah.” With that, Zach disappeared behind the doors, leaving Daryl alone again.

In all honesty, Daryl wasn’t surprised by his reaction. He didn’t think he’d ever had anyone come over here to talk to him. Nor had he ever sent for anyone wanting to run things by him. It just didn’t sit right with him—having people over here, talking business or making complaints. It was okay at the garage, but here? He couldn’t have that here. It was enough that he had to deal with whoever Merle chose to bring on those rare occasions when he actually was in the city and wasn’t getting himself into any funny business. Daryl didn’t want other people coming in here. Judging the place. Judging him. Staining the place with their presence and making him feel like it was just some shithole. He didn’t like it because, for him, this shithole was the first thing in his life that spelled safety. The first place that he felt like calling home. As he kept thinking about that, he decided it was a completely stupid idea to make this lady come over here. He promised himself he wouldn’t let people who wanted to talk business in, and that’s the way it should stay—he told himself, making another decision. The biker headed toward the door with every intention of stopping that woman on her way and dealing with it outside. After that, he’d come back, enjoy his second beer of the evening, and watch some TV.

Daryl opened the door and came to an abrupt stop, barely avoiding bumping into a blonde girl standing right outside his door.

“Woah!” The girl breathed in, apparently having had a little scare. “You scared me!”

The girl accused him, but there was a smile plastered on her face, and she giggled a little nervously. Daryl just looked at her, astonished not only by her presence at his doorstep but also by her beauty. He’d never had the chance to look at her from such close proximity before. Not even in the woods when he carried her back to her folks on his back. It was too dark back then, and even if it wasn’t, he doubted he would have been able to focus on her in such circumstances. But now she was standing right in front of him in her pink sweater and blue jeans, her blonde hair pulled back into a ponytail, and her lips lightened up with lip gloss. He couldn’t help noticing how utterly perfect this girl was. No wonder Zach had called her a “hot chick,” although Daryl thought it was a little inappropriate for Zach to call her that when she looked no older than fifteen. She would be a beautiful woman when she grew up, that’s for sure. Now, she was just some little girl who had completely lost her mind coming here. She reminded him of Lizzie Thompson way too much. Not that Lizzie would ever smile at him the way this girl just had, but damn, if blondie didn’t look the part.

The girl stopped laughing but was still smiling at him, and after another moment of silence, she uttered softly:

“I’m sorry to bother you, Mr. Dixon, but my doctor said that if you hadn’t been there to help me out, my recovery could have taken much longer. Thanks to you, I just have to use this crutch for one more week, and I already feel a lot better. So, I thought that maybe I could give you something as a thank-you gift, you know?” Once she opened her mouth, it was as if she were never going to stop talking—that’s something Daryl was going to learn very soon. For now, he was left speechless once again, trying to understand everything she was saying to him and finding the right response. “My dad wanted me to wait until my foot was all better to leave home, but I just couldn’t stay in bed knowing how awful all those city folks were to you. I’ve heard about some of the stuff they’ve been saying. It’s not right of them to just assume you had something to do with what happened to Sophia. You, of all people!” Beth exclaimed, as if it were the most unbelievable thing she’d ever heard in her life. Daryl wasn’t sure how it made him feel.

Part of him wanted to lash out at this poor girl just because she was naïve enough to assume she knew anything about what Daryl Dixon was capable of. Another part of him just wanted to make her stop. To silence her. Because for all the nice things coming out of her mouth, he couldn’t help but feel like he was going to have a panic attack. She unsettled him. Made him think about the things he did not want to think about. About how quickly people judged him for things he hadn’t done, and how strange it was that this girl chose not to believe it.

Well, boo-hoo, girlie, life ain’t fucking fair, alright?

His inner voice sounded suspiciously like Merle’s.

“Oi! Just fucking slow down, alright?” Daryl managed to say at last. “The hell you talking about, girlie?”

He even managed to sound a little unpleasant, which was a small victory since for a second there, he thought he wouldn’t be able to utter anything at all, let alone anything remotely sensible.

It worked too—she shut up, her eyes going a little wider as if his rudeness had shocked her into silence. Not for long, though.

“Oh, I’m sorry. I talk way too much when I’m nervous. Don’t mind me. I just… just take this.” She brought her hands up and held a round box wrapped in paper out to him. Daryl looked down at the box and then back up at her face, even more confused than before. It was packed in some colorful paper carefully and thoughtfully. No one had ever gotten him anything like this.

“I hope you like apple pies,” Beth added, nervously biting her lower lip.

“I do,” he said absent-mindedly, tentatively taking the box from her. As he started to pry it open, she quipped proudly:

“I baked it myself.”

Oh.

So it was a baking tray wrapped in paper.

“You,” the biker started, then hesitated, looking back at the pie and then up at her again. “You baked this.” Daryl stated it, and Beth smiled and nodded. Confusion still didn’t leave Daryl’s eyes. “For me?”

The man didn’t think it was possible, but Beth’s smile became even wider.

“Yeah, I did.”

“Why?” Daryl couldn’t stop himself from expressing his bewilderment.

“I told you already. Because you saved me.” Daryl snorted, but she didn’t let him interrupt. “And I wanted to do something nice for you.”

This didn’t answer his question at all. This wasn’t enough of an explanation for why she would go to all the trouble of baking something when she could barely move.

“Didn’t you say that your foot was still hurt?”

“Just a little bit,” Beth said, stomping on it and then scrunching her nose. It was at this point that Daryl realized he was still keeping her on his doorstep when she clearly had trouble standing. If the crutch in one of her hands was anything to go by, the girl shouldn’t have spent her time walking around the kitchen baking, let alone standing for a long period of time like she was now. The second thing that he realized was that Zach was still present behind her, yet again gawking.

“Shouldn’t have gone through all that trouble, girl,” Daryl told her at last. He realized how awkward he sounded, but it couldn’t be helped. He thought about inviting her inside, of course, but that was not an option. With the whole city on his back, it didn’t feel safe to hang out with yet another teenager. Not that he would want to do that anyway.

Beth didn’t seem offended by his reaction.

“Oh, no, no trouble at all, Mr. Dixon. It was a pleasure. You can’t even imagine how bored one can get when they’re supposed to sit on their butt for a week or so.” The blonde girl chirped, yet again making him flinch at the words "Mr. Dixon" spoken in such a soft, tender manner and referring to him of all people. It was wrong for her to use this name. Wrong on so many levels.

“Don’t go callin’ me that. Ain’t no Mr. Dixon. ‘M Daryl.”

Yet again, the biker had to avert his eyes from the girl. Talking to her now made him feel way more uncomfortable than back in the woods. The man couldn’t stand the way she looked at him. Daryl wasn’t sure why, but it bothered him. She bothered him.

“It’s a pleasure, Daryl.” With those words, she extended her hand to him once again, this time with the implication that he should do the same. “I’m Beth. Beth Greene.”

Daryl hesitated.

“I know,” he told her instead of reaching up and taking her hand in his.

“Oh. Do you?”

Was it only his imagination, or did she sound a little too cheeky now? His hands started to sweat.

“Yeah, you’re Hershel’s youngest daughter,” he told her. “Y’all live in the suburbs in that big fancy farmhouse of yours.”

The girl nodded, taking her lower lip between her teeth, trying not to smile and failing miserably. What was all that smiling about anyway? Shouldn’t her cheeks hurt already?

“So, Daryl, are you planning on shaking my hand anytime soon?”

No.

Don’t think so.

Get lost, kid.

Daryl took her dainty, delicate hand into his big, rough one and got another one of her sweet smiles in return.

Maybe it was that little string of electricity coursing through his veins, or maybe it was something else entirely, but just a second later, he all but ripped his hand away and made a rather menacing remark.

“So your daddy’s fine with his sweet little girl visitin’ a redneck asshole suspected of murder, huh? Thought he was a smart man.”

He wasn’t lookin' straight at her—wasn’t that brave—but out of the corner of his eye, he saw her wince a little. For some sick reason, it made him feel better to see her upset all of a sudden. It felt safer than havin' her smile at him like he deserved it, like he weren’t the jackass the whole town believed him to be.

“He is a smart man.”

“He ain’t that smart if he let you come here. And you? The hell you think you’re doin’ here, girl? You think I need your fuckin' pity or what?”

“Daryl, it’s not…” The girl tried interruptin' him, but Daryl was way past the point of listenin' to reason.

“I didn’t fuckin' save you either, alright? Didn’t mean nothin'. Didn’t make me into a hero or whatever you imagine in that little brain of yours! Was just havin' a real crappy day and didn’t want any more kids disappearin’, alright? Doesn’t mean I’m your fuckin' friend now, and if you think you can just come and visit and be all fuckin' nice and dumb all over my place, then you lost your damned mind!” Now he was looking straight at her, getting in her face and forgetting about the damn pie she’d made for him outta the goodness of her heart. Beth flinched when he neared the space between them, and hell if it didn’t make him cringe inside at the satisfaction he felt in that moment. Now, that was how she was supposed to react to him. That was somethin' he knew how to deal with. Lizzie Thompson coming to him with a big smile on her face and giving him pies wasn’t sitting right with him.

Beth didn’t say anything, apparently too hurt to do so, and Daryl took this moment of silence as his way out.

“Thanks for the pie, sweetheart. Now, get your pretty little ass off my property.”

Daryl slammed the door in Beth’s face and breathed out a sigh of relief. Next, he heard Zach askin' her if she was alright. It took her a moment to answer that question, and when she did, Daryl didn’t miss the fact that her voice sounded a little uneven.

“’M fine,” she said, and as she started moving away from the door, he heard Zach apologizing for him.

“I don’t know what got into him. To go off on you like that when you were so nice. I’d never…” The boy’s voice was getting quieter with every step they took. Zach had to walk real slow to match her pace. It had to be hard to walk with that crutch too. And yet she’d baked him that damned pie.

Daryl looked down at the tray he had in his hands. If he was honest with himself, the biker didn’t know what had gotten into him either. He couldn’t explain it, really, but Daryl rarely understood his own emotions. So the man did the only thing that’d ever worked when he couldn’t get a hold of his own feelings: he shut 'em all down.

Chapter 3: You're ready now

Summary:

The one in which Beth keeps thinking about Daryl even though she shouldn't ;)

Notes:

Hello again!
Thank you for all your comments! I've been a little busy over the week, so I couldn't write you all back, but I am so grateful for each and every lovely comment. You are amazing, guys! And you're making me even more excited about sharing the rest of the story with you <3
Thank you so, so much! <3
You're truly the best! <3

Beth had spent her Uber drive in complete silence, too focused on what had just transpired to indulge in a small talk with her driver. She thought about this moment for almost a week. Her friends came over a few times letting her in on the gossip. Everyone believed that it was Daryl who hurt Sophia. The word got out that the girl was sexually abused, but they didn’t find any DNA. It was unfair for them to just assume that it’s Daryl. Just because he was questioned didn’t mean anything, Beth tried telling them just that, but nobody was listening to her. Nobody believed her when she told them how nice Dixon was to her when he found her in the woods either. Even Maggie, who saw it with her own eyes, would be skeptical when told that in fact Daryl wasn’t surly or rude and even refused to leave her alone. Actually, everyone except for her Daddy laughed and teased her about it every time the subject was brought in.

At some level she understood that it was hard to believe that someone with a bad reputation who’s never nice to anyone could actually be kind to another person. Still, it was infuriating, especially when they all drowned her arguments with stories about some angry college kids that pierced Dixon’s tires, some guy who spit in his face at the market, or at least that’s what the rumor said – there was no way of knowing if someone was that brave for real though -  and about how everyone thought that the man should be brought to justice. Beth didn’t like how fast they were to judge him. Even more so since the man actually saved her from getting herself injured even more and helped her get back to her folks.

In fact, the more Greene girl thought about it the more sure she was that the biker was a good person and didn’t deserve that kind of treatment. She just had to do something. Something nice. Everyone deserves some kindness in their lives, right? Right. So Beth got to it. And of course, she didn’t tell daddy. Didn’t tell her mom either. She waited for them to be gone for a few hours, and just then got into baking. It was hard to do so with her foot in the state it was in, but totally worth it. Or that’s what the girl thought before that awful visit at Dixon’s garage. She thought it was going pretty well when all of a sudden Daryl’s demeanor changed. Was it something she said? Beth couldn’t help but wonder. She just wanted to be nice. Even if he thought she was being silly, the man should keep those thoughts to himself. It made her really angry at first, that he would say something like this about her daddy and then about her. But as she was nearing home the new feeling overcame her. Perhaps Jimmy was right, Beth thought to herself. Perhaps she was too naïve for her own good. Sadness swept through her as she left the cab and headed towards the front doors of Greene’s household. It didn’t help that her father was waiting for her on the porch.

After that fiasco with Daryl Beth didn’t feel like standing her ground against her father’s accusations. She approached him ready to hear him out and agree to everything he had to say about her doings. Beth didn’t look up at her father, too ashamed to do so. She has never lied to him before. The silence stretched for a long moment before her father spoke, and when he did, it wasn’t exactly what she was expecting to hear.

“So?” Beth scrunched her eyebrows and looked up to see her dad watching her expectantly. He didn’t look as upset with her as she thought he would be. She could tell that he was curious though, which was rather strange.  What was he asking here? At last the man took pity on her and supplied: “Did Daryl Dixon like whatever it was you baked for him?”

The youngest Greene girl frowned.

“How…” She couldn’t comprehend it. “How did you know?”

Hershel Greene smiled.

“He’s all you were talking about this past week, Bethy, and I do listen to you very carefully.” Beth blushed a little hearing it said out loud. If it was someone else telling her that Dixon is all she’s talking about, she would rush into a fight. But there was no point in arguing with her daddy. Besides, it didn’t sound as if Hershel was telling her off for it. Rather just making a point, so she stayed silent, listening to what her father had to say. “So to have you throwing a tantrum about how it’s so unfair that the city folks judged him so quickly, then following it up with how someone should do something nice for him, and then with you disappearing from the house like this, it’s pretty obvious, isn’t it?”

Beth sighed.

“I guess it is.” She admitted.

“Yes, and the state of our kitchen was a huge giveaway for baking.” His smile became wider.

“Oh. I totally forgot to clean!”

“Yes, that you did. You also forgot to tell me that you were going to visit Daryl Dixon.”

“I know. I’m so sorry, daddy. I just…”

Beth fell silent, realizing that what she was going to say could start a fight. Hershel beat her to it though.

“You just didn’t think I would let you do this. Am I right?”

“Yes, but…”

 Hershel raised a hand to stop her in her tracks.

“You’re right. I wouldn’t. Do you know why?”

Beth sighed. She had to fight the need to roll eyes. She’s heard the sentence she was about to utter so many times that she has lost her count. However, it was the first time that this sentence applied to her instead of her older siblings.

“Yeah, he’s dangerous and I shouldn’t acquaint myself with people like him, because they spell trouble.”

“No. That’s why your mother wouldn’t let you do it.” Beth looked up, yet again surprised. “Personally, I wouldn’t call baking someone a cake or pie or whatever you did ‘acquainting yourself’ with that person. What you did was kind and frankly I’m proud that my daughter is smart enough to have a brain of her own and not give in to what people are saying.”

A small smile broke through all of her sadness and appeared on her face. Perhaps Daryl wasn’t too grateful for the pie, but her daddy was proud of her, and that’s what really mattered.

“Thank you.”

“It doesn’t mean that I’m happy with you, Bethy. Not only did you go against the doctor's orders, but you also went behind my back, and I don’t appreciate it.”

“I know, I’m really sorry. I will never do that again, I promise.” Beth kissed both of his father’s cheeks and smiled brightly.

“Now, I believe your mother wants to grill you about acquainting yourself with dangerous bikers.” They exchanged knowing smiles. “But if you want to postpone it I’ll happily sit here for a little longer and listen to how it went with Dixon.”

Beth glanced at the door. If she could, she would postpone the conversation with her mom . But if she was honest, she didn’t want to talk about the biker anymore. Not after that confusing meeting with him. The whole thing was so strange. He was different from what she expected him to be. Not quite as scary and unapproachable as in all of the stories she’s heard about him. Not quite as perverted, nasty or dirty. Not disgusting either. In fact, there was something very pleasing in his face. Something that made it hard for her to look away. And no, he wasn’t handsome. At least not in the way that some high school boys or actors were. He was a mean and coarse looking man. But there was something about him, perhaps in his eyes or in the way he moved, that made her…

No, no, no, can’t be thinking about that. It’s stupid. Nothing’s there. He’s just coarse and mean, and there’s nothing underneath it all that would make him into a good man!

Beth huffed with annoyance, and just then she remembered that her father was still watching her expectantly.

“He…” Greene stopped herself on the verge of telling her daddy that Daryl Dixon is an ungrateful man and she will not see him again. Ever. Looking back to it she had no idea why she hesitated, nor did she know why those words never left her mouth. Instead she did what she had just promised she would never do. She lied. “He was very grateful. Was even nice enough to offer me a cup of tea. And I’m sure you’ll be glad to hear that he told me off for coming to see him with my foot in a state like that.”

Hershel smiled and Beth’s cheeks got a shade darker. It was the first time she’s ever lied to her father. It was also one of many times Beth would lie to him in the coming months, but she couldn’t have known that yet. For now, all was well on the Greene’s farm.

Beth came in and got “the talk” from her mother. Then she helped prepare dinner and the five of them: her mommy, her daddy, her brother and sister, sat at the table, said their prayers and shared the meal together. Maggie talked their ears off with how awesome college is, how fun college kids are and how she’s happy she decided on applying after those two years of working as a waitress at IHOP. Now she only stayed with them on the weekends, because her college was in Atlanta and it seemed more sufficient for her to stay on the campus. That, and Maggie really wanted to get away from home. Unlike Beth, who thought that she could spend her whole life on a farm, the older Greene girl was more of a free bird. Living on the farm was suffocating her. Shawn, who had finished his high school this year too and started attending community college near home, so that he could stay at the farm and help, wasn’t nearly as excited as Maggie was. To Beth it looked like he did the college thing just because it was expected of him, not because he really wanted to continue his education. Seeing as Shawn was never the one for talking a lot, the attention soon shifted to Beth and to what she was planning on doing this year. It was her Senior year, so the youngest Greene girl had a lot to think about. She already knew what major she was going to pick. She applied to a few universities, some of them closer to her home, some further away and now was waiting for the acceptance letters that were probably going to come near April. It meant that after April the only thing left will be picking the college from the ones that accepted her. Unless none of them does, or only one does, which her parents found unlikely, but Beth feared it nonetheless. Truly, she wasn’t sure if she wanted to go away or stay on the farm yet. All of her friends were thinking about moving out of their family houses and attending college somewhere far away, and part of her wanted to do that too. It could be fun. Leaving Georgia. Living somewhere far away, maybe even in another state. But on the other hand the girl liked it here. But did it mean she wanted to stay forever? She wasn’t sure. Some tough choices were waiting for her, that was the conclusion she left her mother with.

After dinner Shawn and Maggie took care of the dishes, and meanwhile their parents chose a movie for their weekly movie night. She spent a rather pleasant evening with her family, and after that, as she lay in bed ready to fall asleep, Beth thought once again about the rude biker. This time only to come up with a conclusion that she won’t let herself be bothered by him any more. If Daryl Dixon didn’t want her kindness, he wouldn’t get it. That was the end of it, the youngest Greene girl thought to herself seconds before falling asleep.

Funny enough, after she saw him for the first time in the woods, it was like the dam had broken, because just as she hadn't seen him for the first two years of him living in this town even once, now she would see him almost every time she was in the city. The second time was at Sophia’s funeral, which wasn’t really a surprise seeing as he was apparently close friends with Peletier. Yet again Ed, Carol’s husband, didn’t show up and Dixon spent the whole ceremony by Carol’s side.

Sometimes Beth would just see lots of bikes and recognize his muscular arms or broad shoulders. Sometimes she would see him crossing the street or entering some shop. She would come out of the church with her family and there he would be running somewhere with another guy from The Feral Angels. She would be shopping with her friends and see him from behind the display window. And none of her friends or family would ever notice how she froze in the spot every time it happened.  Beth couldn’t explain why she tensed up at the very sight of the man. Maybe it was because she had two totally different pictures of him in her head now and couldn’t decide which was the right one? Maybe because he acted so rude when she visited him with the apple pie and it stressed her out to think about it? Or maybe it was because after another few weeks of her defending Daryl against her friends’ accusations, they’ve taken to teasing her about him and calling her a Dixon’s girl every time the subject of the Dixon’s was brought out. It was actually getting kind of ridiculous in her opinion, since at times she wouldn’t even take part in the conversation and all of a sudden Jimmy, to everyone’s delight, would ask something like Hey, and what do you think about it, Dixon’s girl? Does he still sound like your prince charming?

Beth didn’t get it. It wasn’t like she insisted that Daryl Dixon was a saint or that she was fascinated or in any way affected by the fact that he did good to her on that night. At least, she didn’t think it appeared that way. She just told the truth and got crucified for the effort.

None of her friends noticed, or maybe didn’t want to notice, the way Daryl took care of Carol on that terrible night, but Beth did. He was that infamous man who treated women badly. The man who called them names and threw them out on the streets at night. But if that was true, then why would the biker take care of Beth that way? Why didn’t he call her names for being so clumsy and inattentive? Why didn’t the man leave her there? Why was he so gentle with her, and then with Carol? It just struck Beth as weird. Unfortunately, talking to her friends about it turned out to be a bad idea so she stopped wondering about it out loud, hoping that it would be enough for them to forget the whole Dixon’s girl thing.

Over three weeks later it was all forgotten, and although Beth still felt bad about the way the whole town treated Daryl and just a tad mad that he didn’t appreciate her baking for him, she finally stopped tensing up at the sight of him. Greene kind of wished that being called Dixon’s girl was her main problem, because now she had a bigger one. She’s been with Jimmy for a year now, and although Beth thought her boyfriend would forget by this time, the boy still remembered the promise she made on their three month anniversary. Even worse, the closer it got to their one-year anniversary the more heated Jimmy’s kisses became.

On Saturday afternoon, exactly one month after her visit at the Dixon’s garage, her boyfriend, Jimmy showed up at her doorstep and took her to the movies in his shiny new car. On that date he made it known to her that by this time next week she will no longer be a virgin. “It’s been a year, Beth. All of our friends who have been together shorter than we have already done it. Besides, you promised me, remember? One year. That’s what you said, Bethy, so you’re ready now, right?” She wasn’t. At least she didn’t think so. But Jimmy was right. All of their friends had already done that, and she did promise him they would. After one year, she said, when he tried pursuing it after three months of dating. Back then it seemed like a lot of time. It seemed like the whole eternity and Beth was sure that after all that time she would be ready. It was her last year of high school too and all of her girlfriends believed that one should do it by the end of their senior year. So the youngest Greene girl didn’t correct Jimmy when the boy suggested they should do it next weekend, and as she let that happen, all that she could think of for the next few days was Friday night. The night she was going to have sex for the first time in her life.

Beth thought about it in the shower, in her bed, in the Church on Sunday, and at every lesson she’s had this week. She thought about it while riding Nelly, her favorite horse. Thought about it while reading books and doing homework. Couldn’t eat. Couldn’t sleep. By the end of the week not only was she scared and on the verge of panicking but also more exhausted than she’s ever remembered being. Telling her friends didn’t prove to be a good idea either. One of her best friends, Amy, who lost her virginity on her sixteenth birthday told Beth that it was awfully painful for her that first time, so not only Beth didn’t really want to do it, but also was scared of the pain now. And that wasn’t even the worst part. The worst was the fact that Beth didn’t feel anything at all while kissing Jimmy. It didn’t make her feel hot and bothered, like her friends told her it should.

Beth heard many times about how Amy was going out of her mind when Thomas was touching and kissing her, how her other friend, Lilly, missed Adam so much it hurt if they haven’t seen each other for longer than two weeks and how girls both felt like being embraced by their boyfriends’ arms was the best feeling in the whole world. All of these stories made Beth even more insecure and worried, because she didn’t feel it like that. Yeah, it felt nice when Jimmy was hugging her, but there were no butterflies, not ever, and no desire to kiss or touch him. Beth liked him, felt good in his presence, felt good when he hugged her, but the only thing she could say about his kisses was that it didn’t disgust her when he did it.

Perhaps it wouldn’t be that weird or abnormal if it wasn’t for the fact that Beth’s boyfriend was one of the few boys in their high school that every girl wanted to date. Not only because he was popular and rich, but also because he was very handsome and polite. He was liked by everyone, not only high schoolers, but also teachers and parents. Jimmy was that golden child that everyone wanted to be friends with, and at least at the beginning Beth was flustered that from all the girls he’d pick her. It was also nice, because she’s never had a boyfriend before him, so for the first three months everything in their relationship was new, exciting and lovely, but then it ended just as suddenly as it started. Those sweet little kisses they’d exchanged up to this point weren’t enough for Jimmy anymore and Beth felt like it shouldn’t be enough for her too.

She remembered clearly when just after two months of dating Lilly lost her virginity to Adam and then told Beth all about it, blushing furiously and explaining that she wanted to wait, she really wanted, but it felt so good on that evening and nobody was home and she just wanted him so much in that moment she couldn’t stop herself. Beth wished she could feel that way with Jimmy. Back at the beginning when Beth had told them that she didn’t feel about Jimmy the way they did about their boyfriends Amy smirked at her and said “Oh, don’t worry about it. Just wait, Greene.” and Lilly added: “Yeah, two months from now you won’t be able to take your hands off him.” Beth believed them. But one year in and she still didn’t feel like having sex with him, which couldn’t be said about the schools’ quarterback.

Lilly, seeing her all nervous about it, said that if Beth didn’t want to do it she could just tell him she’s got her period earlier. But the blond girl knew that even if she did she wouldn’t be able to run away from this for much longer. Making excuses like that would only get her one, maybe two more weeks of freaking out. The sooner the better, Beth thought to herself, but if she was being honest with herself, it was making her nauseous.

On Friday morning Jimmy surprised her by telling her that he invited Amy and Tom over for beers. His parents were supposed to be out for the whole weekend and even though he didn’t want a big party, Jimmy thought it would put Beth at ease if they hung out with friends first instead of jumping into bed straight away. Her boyfriend winked at her at the end of that sentence and yet again Beth felt nauseous.

What is wrong with me?  Beth wondered, looking at her boyfriend’s perfectly fine ass as he walked away from her. Jimmy was so dreamy, every girl in high school would probably faint from excitement if he proposed the same thing to them. So why wasn’t Beth excited? Why did she feel like she was making a huge mistake?

Friday came too soon and before Beth knew it, she was driving back from school to have a shower, shave, put some makeup on and change into something nicer than her school uniform. Since the morning she was all nerves, and as if the world didn’t think she had enough, when the girl pulled into Greene’s driveway her eyes met with none other but Daryl Dixon’s blue eyes. He came out from behind her daddy’s tractor wiping grease from his rough hands, wearing white, tightly fitted tank and ripped jeans that hung low on his hips. Oddly enough at the very sight of the man her heartbeat picked its pace and her palms started to sweat.

Beth parked her car right next to the tractor and after taking a huge calming breath she got out of the car only to notice that Daryl Dixon had already vanished somewhere without saying as much as ‘hello’ to her. Perhaps that was for the better though, seeing as the last conversation between them didn’t go too smoothly.

Without giving it much thought, Beth headed towards the front doors and that’s when she spotted Daryl again. The biker was talking to her father on the porch. Hershel looked concerned but Beth concluded that he always looked like this when he was talking business with someone.

The blond girl was just taking into consideration the idea of walking into the house by the kitchen entrance when her father, unfortunately, spotted her.

“Bethy! What are you doing lurking in there? Come on in, sweetheart! Dinner is almost ready!” The man greeted her, and even though Daryl didn’t turn around to look at her, Beth felt her cheeks darken a little.

“I’m not lurking, daddy! I just didn’t want to interrupt” Beth explained but followed her father’s exclamations and strode to the front door, doing everything in her power not to look at Daryl Dixon while passing him. Much to her disdain it couldn’t be avoided though. The minute his face came into her view her own eyes betrayed her. Their eyes met yet again and even though she promised herself she will never say another word to him, Beth found herself uttering silently: “Nice to see you again, Mr. Dixon”

Without waiting for his reply, Beth rushed into the house where she could finally breathe in a sigh of relief. It turned out that only one Daryl Dixon was needed for her to forget all about her boyfriend’s big plans. For the next few minutes, as her father kept talking to the biker, Beth kept wondering about Daryl’s sudden appearance on the farm. For more than two years no Dixon has ever set his foot on their grounds, and Beth doubted if they did so on any other ground. They were not very welcomed by people, and even though the younger Dixon was helping Mr. Collins run the garage, it didn’t mean people trusted him. For the city folk it was fine to leave the car with Daryl at the Dixon’s garage, but to have him come to your house and help on your property, that was something entirely different.

Finally, her father went inside. Thankfully alone.

Beth didn’t jump into questioning. She waited for everyone to gather at the table, say their prayers and start eating before she did.

“So, what has Daryl been doing here?”  Beth hoped she sounded as casually as possible.

“I needed some help with the tractor, and with Otis’ broken leg, I had to call Jess instead. Turns out there’s not much to do for Daryl these days so I told Jess it’s fine by me if he sends him over.” The youngest Greene nodded, convinced that this is the end of the subject. She couldn’t be more wrong. “Having said that, Annette, darling, I hope you don’t mind, but I asked Daryl if he would like to help me out tomorrow as well.”

The silence that fell over the table after those words was unmistakable. At least for every Greene in the house. Annette was not happy. That’s what the silence said.

“You. Did. What?! Hershel Greene! Are you out of your mind?! Do you know what people are saying about this man?!”

“Of course I do. Everyone knows, darling.”

Shawn exchanged looks with Beth. They both knew what was coming. The only one to never know when to shut up and apologize seemed to be Annette’s husband.

“And still! You’re inviting him here. To our house?! What if the word gets out? What if people start talking about us hiring this man after all that he did?! And that poor little girl! Did you even stop to consider that we too have a little girl in this house?!”

Beth scrunched her nose. I’m not a little girl. I’m seventeen! She wanted to shout out but knew better than to do so. It did get annoying sometimes though. That everyone in this family still believed her to be ‘a little girl’ when she felt fully grown up. They would never treat Shawn like this.

“We don’t know who is responsible for Sophia’s death, honey.”

“But he’s the only suspect!” Annette’s voice raised to a pitch. “It’s enough that you agreed to him coming over here today, but to have him work here for another day, it’s outrageous! Not only because of that poor girl but also because of his bad reputation! You know that he’s no good, Hershel, and yet you will let him near our home. I am so disappointed in you, Hershel Greene.”

With those words Annette Greene walked away from the table leaving the rest of the family in silence.

Hershel sighed, but before he could apologize for destroying dinner, Shawn spoke up:

“I get it. Where you’re coming from. You think he’s innocent until proven guilty, and because of that you want to give him a chance, but mom is right, you know? He’s not good people. Never was. Maybe he’s not the one who hurt Sophia, but he is guilty of many other things. He doesn’t deserve your pity, dad.”

With that Shawn left the table, leaving the two of them alone. Hershel smiled sadly.

“You know, Bethy, the sad part is, I think they both may be right.”

Beth scrunched her eyebrows.

“Then why did you offer him a job here?”

Hershel shrugged.

“I’m not sure.” He admitted, and as Beth opened her mouth to express her bewilderment, her dad added thoughtfully: “I didn’t plan on it, but after he got the tractor running and came over to talk to me I had the chance to look at him closely, you know, to listen to him talk, and I just had the strangest feeling.”

“The strangest feeling?” Beth asked when he didn’t follow it up with any explanation.

“Well, yes, it’s hard to explain, really…” Hershel didn’t go into details. Instead he fell silent yet again only to shrug it off a few minutes later. “I should probably go and apologize to your mother. And didn’t you say you had to get ready for girl’s night right after dinner?”

Chapter 4: Will you murder me if I go with you?

Summary:

Beth has a night of bad experiences. Will meeting Daryl Dixon again be one of them?

Notes:

Hi everyone!
I just wanted to say that this is one of the chapters which made me add the "rape/non-con" tag, so if this subject makes you feel bad I recommend to stop reading at “Jimmy, I don’t think I wanna do this…” and start reading again at: Beth shot out of the bed, followed by Jimmy’s anger.

This is a long one, because I decided to combine two chapters into one. It didn't feel right to cut it in the middle of our favorite duos meeting <3
If you have any preference you can let me know in the comments if you like longer or shorter chapters more :)

What Jimmy called ‘inviting a few friends over to lighten up the mood turned out to be quite a huge party. After the word got out that the school’s quarterback had the house to himself for the whole weekend, a lot of people just invited themselves over one way or another. To say that Beth didn’t like what she saw when she got to her boyfriend’s house half an hour late was an understatement. Beth didn’t do parties. Never. She’d never gotten drunk or anything either, and she didn’t appreciate Jimmy not calling her and at least informing her of how everything turned out. She would have gladly stormed off right after setting foot inside and seeing how big the party was, but her boyfriend had other plans.

It was a few minutes after Beth was seated on the couch by Jimmy when Thomas’s brother, who had provided alcohol for them and stayed for an hour, getting lightly buzzed, got up and said he’d be going, as he nicely put it, ‘to fuck his girlfriend’s brain out.’

“Cheers to that!” Jimmy shouted after him, raising his glass and taking a long sip. Then her not-so-sober boyfriend looked right at her and winked. “Why don’t we find some nice, quiet spot to talk, darling? Haven’t seen you much this week,” he told her, grabbing her hand and helping her up from the couch she was sitting on with Amy, Thomas, and some other girl from their school who was in classes with Amy. When Beth looked to her friend seeking help, the brunette was already too occupied with Thomas’s mouth to pay attention. Her other friend, Lilly, was nowhere to be seen, so there was no one to rescue her. Beth sighed, wishing it could all just be over. She didn’t like parties like that, probably because she was the only person here who wasn’t drinking. Beth wasn’t into that, and perhaps that was part of her issue. Perhaps there was something really wrong with her head for not wanting all those things people her age loved doing so much.

The “nice and quiet” place turned out to be Jimmy’s bedroom, which wasn’t really surprising to Beth. Upstairs, the music wasn’t that loud, and since everyone was downstairs, the risk of someone walking in on them was rather small. Beth would have still preferred if the door were closed, but just last week Jimmy had somehow lost the key and didn’t have the time to get a new one.

“So, you’re having fun, Bethy?” Jimmy licked his lips, looking up at her from his drawers. He was searching for something, and Beth had an idea of what it was.

The blonde girl turned away from him and went to sit on the bed. She could feel her hands shaking but ignored it.

“Not really. I think I might be going home soon.”

Jimmy finally found what he was looking for and turned around to her. He neared the bed, holding a condom between his fingers.

“No need for that. We're going to have a lot of fun in a second,” he told her, taking his shirt off and discarding it somewhere near the bed.

So, he wasn’t drunk enough to forget about or reschedule his plans for tonight…

Beth tried to smile but was too nervous to do so, especially since the next thing Jimmy did was get on the bed and help her out of her shirt. She lay down on the bed, letting him kiss her, but Jimmy was too impatient to wait. Before she could object, he had his legs between hers and was grinding on her with his hard-on, still kissing her hungrily. His hands roamed her body, squeezing her butt and then coming up to do the same with her breasts. Her bra soon became an inconvenience for the boy, and so it had to be taken off.

“You’re free to touch me too, you know?” Jimmy whispered in her ear and started kissing down her neck, still squeezing her breasts with his delicate, long-fingered hands that had no idea what hard work even was. Beth obeyed this request too, getting her hands up and putting them on his shoulders, then a bit further on his back. She didn’t really have the need to touch him. Didn’t have the need to be touched by him either.

“Jimmy, I don’t think I wanna do this…”

He didn’t listen. Beth gasped when Jimmy’s mouth found her left breast and his hands gripped her ass at the same time. She could feel her boyfriend smiling around her nipple, probably thinking it felt good for her when in truth she just felt exposed and disgusted.

“Jimmy…”

She wanted it to stop. Wanted to get dressed and go to the bathroom to cry her eyes out. She didn’t like it at all, and although he had nice, clean hands, she felt dirty in all the places he touched.

“Shh, no need to be scared.”

The hard-on pressing against her thigh was making her sick, and the fact that he was smiling into her skin was making her angry. It was when he stopped licking her breasts and started kissing her down her tummy while his hands came up to open her jeans that Beth felt like she was going to die if he continued.

“Stop.” She told him, but this time he didn’t listen to her either. He opened her jeans, but when he tried to slide them down, her hands came to fight with his. “I said stop, Jimmy! I don’t want to do this!”

“Oh, come on, don’t play hard to get now! You promised,” he told her, fighting her hands off and putting his tongue in her mouth to silence her. Beth was close to sobbing now. She didn’t even think about not wanting it anymore; she was just desperate to get out of this bed and out of this room and maybe even out of this damn party.

“Get off me, Jimmy!” she shouted at him, pushing his tongue out of her mouth and him off her. Instead of letting go of her, though, Jimmy used even more strength to hold her down and started taking his jeans off, ignoring her wiggling and shouting. She felt her stomach clench—not with desire but with fear. She didn’t stop fighting, and after a few more minutes of struggle, he finally gave up and let her go. Beth shot out of the bed, followed by Jimmy’s anger.

“What the hell, Beth?! You said one year! I waited! I was so patient, and what now? You still can’t do this?! What's your problem?!” Jimmy shouted at her, not getting up from the bed. Beth found her shirt and put it on quickly, not even looking at him.

“I’m sorry. I just can’t do this. I can’t.” Her voice was breaking, and she could feel the tears building in her eyes.

“I’m sorry. I can’t do this,” he mimicked her, making a face. “What are you, twelve? When will you stop being so damn selfish, huh? You’re not the only one in this relationship! I have needs too. If you’d at least give me a head once in a while, but no, you can’t do that either, can you? God, you’re so damn green it makes me sick!”

It was too much for her. She’d never seen him like that, never even heard him raise his voice at her. It was like she was seeing Jimmy for the first time. Like he had this other face she’d never seen before, and that other boy, the one hiding somewhere beneath the surface, apparently hated her.

Beth turned away from him and headed to the door, now glad that the key had gone missing.

“Oh, yeah, of course, run away to your daddy! That’s all you’re good at! If you’re such a child, you shouldn’t be in a relationship!” Jimmy was shouting behind her, but she didn’t turn around again. The blonde girl wasn’t even sure anymore if she was more shaken by the fact that she was being touched in places she didn’t want to be touched by him, that she had to kick her way out of that bed, or by his behavior afterward.

Her first thought was to hide in the bathroom and cry her eyes out, but both of them were occupied: one by a couple (judging from the noises) and the other by a vomiting girl and her friend pulling her hair out of her face. Nobody noticed her distress yet, but Beth was sure that if she ran into Amy or Lilly, she would have to explain everything that happened, and then both girls would raise such a noise that everyone at their school would know about what happened the next morning. Beth wanted to avoid that, and the only other way to do so was to leave the house. She didn’t think she could stay here much longer anyway. Beth was in no state to see Jimmy again—not that night. So, she went to the kitchen and left through the back door with no idea where to go. She’d left her phone and all her other things in her purse in Jimmy’s room, and there was no way she could go back to retrieve them.

That’s how Beth Greene ended up walking down the street alone in the middle of the night with no phone to call for help if anything happened. Truth be told, she didn’t even think about how dangerous it was for her to march through the streets of the city at night—not for the first few miles, at least. Beth was too shaken, too angry, and too miserable to think about anything but her own pain. It wasn’t exactly warm either, and she felt cold wearing only the t-shirt she’d come in. Her stupid jacket was left with her stupid boyfriend—or maybe she should say ex-boyfriend already? Did they break up? Was that it? Would Jimmy stop seeing her after that? Would she want to see him after that?

As if it wasn’t bad enough, right after she passed the street where her favorite coffee shop was, it started raining. She was sure that she was going to come out of it ill. She couldn’t care less. All she wanted to do was walk and cry. She didn’t even know where she was going. Home? It was so far away; it would probably take her the remaining half of the night to get there at the rate she was walking, but it wasn’t like she had anywhere else to be, right?

I could probably get there quicker if I chose to walk through the forest, Beth thought and suddenly felt weak in the knees. The police had never found Sophia’s killer, which meant he was still out there somewhere, maybe planning on killing someone tonight. A strong feeling of dread shot through her and made her quicken her pace. She almost jumped when just a minute later, one of the doors burst open and a man stepped out of the house, quietly closing the door behind himself. Beth saw him before he saw her, and she could feel her heart quicken its pace, her whole body tensing up at the sight of Daryl Dixon.

He stepped down from the porch, and just as he was turning to his bike, their eyes finally met. The man seemed confused for a second or two before his eyes left hers to drop to her shirt, which was drenched from the rain and probably showing too much of her skin. Beth felt a shiver run through her body, so she wrapped her arms around herself even more tightly, turned away from him, and started walking again—fast.

“Hey!” His voice sounded just as she remembered it: deep and husky. “Wait!”

Beth wasn’t scared of Daryl Dixon. She just didn’t want to talk to him. Didn’t want to talk to any man, period. It was late at night, she’d just had the worst hour—or maybe it was two hours—of her life, and she had yet to decide who she hated more: Jimmy or herself.

It was just her luck that when she turned left onto the next street, two young men stepped out of one of the bars and spotted her almost immediately.

“Would you look at that?! Hello, sweetheart!”

“Wanna have a quickie with us both, sugar tits? We’ll pay double if you’ll have us bare!”

She gasped, taking a step back.

“No, thanks!” she shouted to them, but instead of backing off, they started walking toward her, laughing.

“Oh, come on now! Don’t be like that! You sure look like you need someone to pump you into car seats!” one of them said, and Beth was seconds from turning around and running back to Daryl when an arm was thrown around her shoulder and suddenly there was another body pressed against her side. Beth startled but recognized the man’s voice fast enough not to try to wiggle herself out of his grip.

“What were you sayin’ to her, motherfucker?!” Daryl growled, and although he was alone and there were two of them, both men threw their arms in the air in surrender.

Hearing him say that so possessively made her shiver all over again. This time, she was pretty sure it wasn’t from the cold, because his body was radiating heat, and without thinking about it, Beth was soon leaning into him, her hand coming up behind his back and pressing to his side. She hoped he wouldn’t notice, too focused on those two men who wanted to assault her, but right after she did that, he tensed up for a moment, looking down and to his side to see her hand pressed to him. For a second, Greene thought he was going to extract himself from her and leave her after all, but then he relaxed again and tightened his grip on her.

“Oh God, we’re sorry! We didn’t know!”

“Yeah, sorry, we’re so sorry, Daryl! We promise not to do that again, right, Mike? We won’t even look at her again, see?” They closed their eyes and started backing away. One of them walked into a trash can and almost fell down, but kept apologizing with his eyes closed, and it made Beth realize just how much everyone in this city feared the Dixons. Was she stupid for not being afraid of him? Was she naïve for trusting him? Was it wrong to feel safe with him? To feel more threatened with her high school boyfriend on top of her than with this older, apparently dangerous man hugging her side to side in the middle of the night on an almost empty street?

“Yeah, you better not, or I’ll take your damn eyes out! Now, get your asses out of here, fuckers!”

As soon as he said that, they were gone, and Beth was left with Daryl pressed to her side. Not for long, though. Dixon, apparently not seeing another reason to stay that close to her, took his arm off her shoulders and stepped away, giving her an angry look.

“The hell you think you’re doin’ walkin’ around in the middle of the night like that? You wanna freeze your tits off or what?”

In spite of herself, Beth blushed heavily, looking down at her hard nipples poking through her shirt. It was so wet you could see right through it, and without a bra, there was nothing shielding her breasts from being seen. When she realized that this was probably why Daryl looked down when he first saw her after exiting the house, she wished the earth would swallow her whole. Great, four men saw your breasts on the same freaking night. Way to go, Greene, way to go.

Beth slid her arms higher to hide one of her private parts from Daryl’s eyes, but when she looked up at him again, he wasn’t even looking at her. Apparently, his boots were more interesting than her breasts, and she couldn’t really blame him, since they were pretty small. Jimmy liked to point that out way too often for her to ever forget.

“Well, Mr. Dixon, this is none of your business, but thanks for your concern,” Beth told him, and if it wasn’t for the fact that she was still upset, angry, and now that he was no longer pressed to her, cold again, she would probably have smiled at him then, but she couldn’t bring herself to at this point. It wasn’t like he appreciated her being nice to him anyway. At least it stopped raining, Beth thought, trying to look on the bright side of her current situation.

Her words made Daryl look up at her in surprise. He watched her for a moment, then nodded and grabbed her by the elbow.

“Come on, then. I’ll get you home.”

She let him lead her through the street, pondering how gentle and soft his rough voice became once he was no longer angry or threatening someone.

“You mean you’re gonna walk with me all the way? Because, you know, it’s gonna take hours to—”

“I ain’t insane enough to go on foot,” Daryl interrupted, sounding a bit annoyed again. “I have a bike. If you hadn’t started running from me, we’d already be on our way there.”

It was then that she realized they were going all the way back to the place he had left a few minutes ago. But that wasn’t the most pressing issue the girl had at the moment.

“Wait. I can’t go home.” Beth came to an abrupt stop, sliding her arm out of his grip and waiting for him to turn around to her. He did, and instead of the ‘why not?’ Beth was waiting for, Daryl scanned her face and said:

“You run away or something?”

“Of course not! I was supposed to have a sleepover with my friend.” Beth took her lower lip between her teeth, and when he still watched her silently, she added, “Or at least that’s what my parents think. I was at my boyfriend’s party.”

Beth could tell he was surprised by that. He probably didn’t take her for the type that lies to her parents to go to a party and have sex with her boyfriend. Well, seeing as her boyfriend was at the party and she was here, that last part didn’t go as it was supposed to, but hell if she was going to tell him that.

He wasn’t surprised for long. The next thing Beth knew, Daryl scrunched his nose in anger and then snorted.

“Some boyfriend you have, letting you out in the middle of the night.” He looked so pissed she wasn’t sure if Jimmy would keep his head if he showed up now, and although just a minute ago Beth thought she would never tell Daryl about what happened, she found herself muttering:

“He tried to pressure me into having sex with him and shouted at me when I didn’t want to, so I left.”

Beth bit her lip again, her voice breaking slightly, and tears threatened to fall. She dropped her gaze to the floor, not able to look Daryl in the eyes. Great, now he probably thinks you’re a pathetic little girl. You are, but he didn’t have to know that.

To her utter surprise, Daryl didn’t comment on that. Instead, he asked:

“What were you gonna do, then? If you can’t go home?”

Beth shrugged.

“I figured I would just walk towards my house and stay outside. Pretend that I came home early and stayed outside to watch the sunrise or something. Your bike is loud though and my dad isn't a heavy sleeper.”

Daryl snorted again, but this time she could tell he was more amused than angry. Beth looked up at him, and when their eyes met again, she felt suddenly compelled to smile at him. So she did and then told him in a gentle, sincere tone:

“Thank you for saving me again.”

Daryl shook his head.

“It’s nothin',” he muttered, and before she could tell him just how much it meant to her, he added, “but I ain’t letting you walk all the way home in those wet clothes with your damn nipples poking through your stupid shirt.”

He made a vague gesture toward her chest, which she had forgotten to cover after she came to a stop. And there she was blushing again. She’d never blushed that much when Jimmy talked about her breasts. They were small and unattractive, so she never really thought about wearing see-through shirts or low necklines to tease boys. But something in the way Daryl talked about it, in the way he looked at her when he stepped down those stairs and saw her for the first time that night, made her feel weirdly satisfied. It sure bothered him a lot that her shirt had become see-through, which was interesting, seeing as every time his eyes came close to the area, he would quickly avert them and look at the ground.

“Fine.” Beth rolled her eyes, acting a little exasperated with him. She couldn’t keep herself from smiling at him when their eyes met again, so the whole act was probably for nothing. “What are we going to do, then?”

He searched her face for a long moment, and Beth knew that whatever he was thinking made him nervous, because he took his thumb to his mouth, biting into his skin before finally answering her in a gruff, quiet voice:

“I’ll take you to my place.”

Yeah, right. He will take her to his place. Daryl Dixon, the biker that the whole town feared, will take her to his place in the middle of the night.

Right.

Beth was not freaking out. Not at all.

“Right,” Beth said, voicing her thoughts, because there was nothing else she could come up with. Her brain short-circuited, and there was nothing she could do about it. Because here she was at the age of seventeen, about to go with Daryl Dixon—the man she’d heard so many things about, the man who, even if old and dirty, looked incredibly good in that leather jacket—to his place. Alone. With the man she was sure she wouldn’t be able to stop if he wanted to take her virginity, or kill her, or both. Presumably both. “You know, I appreciate the offer, but I’m not sure that’s a good idea.”

“Yeah, it ain’t, but it’s that or I’m takin’ you home. Your call, girl.”

Yet again, the man averted his eyes from her. Beth knew that going anywhere with anyone at this hour after meeting them accidentally on the street was a rather dangerous idea. Let alone going anywhere with Daryl Dixon. But then again, if he takes me home, my parents will be outraged. Going on foot would take hours, and her being found on the farm in the morning would be pretty easy to explain, but now, in the middle of the night? Not really.

Not only had she lied to them again, not only gone out in the middle of the night and walked through the streets, but also, instead of retrieving her phone and calling a cab, she was about to let that old, dangerous biker take her somewhere on his motorcycle. Even if he did take her home, her mother would never forgive her for riding on the bike with someone who is suspected of murder. Beth would be grounded forever. On the other hand, if Daryl Dixon was a murderer, which wasn’t that unlikely, her mother would never see her again, one way or the other.

“I… Will you murder me if I go with you?”

Daryl snorted.

“Dunno. If you keep on behavin’ like a dumb bitch, I just might.”

“Hey! That wasn’t a nice thing to say at all!”

“Yeah? Askin’ if I’m gonna murder you when I offered to help ya wasn’t nice either.” Daryl locked his eyes on her, challenging her.

“Well, you were the one that told me off for baking for a murderer when I came to see you last time, so actually, I wasn’t the one who implied that first.”

Beth had to resist sticking her tongue out at him.

“Oh, shut up. Nobody likes a smartass.”

Beth snorted in amusement, all but forgetting about her sore mood. She watched one corner of his mouth come up, and she smiled even wider. It was that smile of hers that made him avert his eyes from her again.

“Come on, then.”

Instead of waiting for Beth to answer his earlier question, Daryl started walking toward the house he’d left before, and even though she was sure her father would kill her himself if he knew about it, Beth followed suit.

They neared the place, and Beth noticed for the first time how lovely all the houses on the street looked. It was a good neighborhood not everyone could afford. Well, she guessed that selling guns and other illegal stuff on the side must have been a good career choice for Daryl then.

“Your house looks really nice,” Beth told him, and Daryl turned around to give her a confused look. When Beth pointed out the house he’d left earlier that night, the biker followed her gaze and nodded, but then clarified:

“Yeah, it’s nice inside too, but this ain’t my place. You actually stood outside my door last time you were at the garage.”

“Oh, right.” Beth had thought it was just an office of his or something. She’d never gotten to peek inside. Who would you visit late at night then? Beth wanted to ask, but before she could, the man added, “This here is Carol’s house.”

“Oh.”

“I’d leave you with her, but she was already asleep when I left the place earlier, and last month she didn’t get too much sleep. I’d rather not wake her. Life’s been hard on her since Sophia…”

Daryl didn’t finish that sentence, and Beth smiled sadly. It was obvious that Sophia’s death was painful for him too. Beth knew—or at least suspected for some time now—that Dixon and Carol were a thing, but only now did she realize that he had loved Sophia too. The sad, haunted look on his face couldn’t be mistaken for anything else.

“I know,” she said. “I’m sorry for your loss.”

“Wasn’t my loss,” the biker mumbled, but she could tell he was lying to himself, trying to push it aside, to not let it get to him. It still did, judging by the pained look on his face.

“I’m sorry anyway.”

Daryl ignored her words and instead told her to wait on the sidewalk while he went to retrieve his bike from the little shack next to the house.

Beth waited patiently, wondering if someone would be looking for her and what they would do if they found all her stuff in Jimmy’s room but couldn’t find her. Would they call someone? She hoped not. She would rather not explain to the police why exactly she left the party and where she spent the night. Not to mention explaining to her daddy that not only did she lie to him about the sleepover but also that she’d spent the night with Daryl Dixon. At his place. Oh God, what am I doing?

Before Beth knew it, Daryl was waiting for her, ready to take off, and Beth had to admit that he looked rather attractive on that bike.

He held a helmet out to her, and she took it with shaky hands.

“I’ve never ridden one,” she told him, and of all things, it was that sentence that made him laugh for the first time that night.

“Yeah, figured,” Daryl said, and when she still watched the bike warily, he added with amusement, “Hop on, sweetheart. Time to pop that cherry. It sure ain’t as bad as losin’ it to some inexperienced jackass.”

Beth locked eyes with him, and she half-expected him to wink at her then, but he just kept staring at her with those blue, piercing eyes of his. Was he flirting with her? No, it couldn’t be. If the boy her age called her childish, she didn’t think it was possible for this grown-up man to see anything but a little girl while looking at her. However, it didn’t stop her from wetting her lips with the tip of her tongue and saying:

“Is that a promise, Mr. Dixon?”

Oh God, what even was that? Beth couldn’t remember ever using that tone of voice with anyone, and she instantly felt ashamed of doing it just now. Daryl, instead of laughing at her or pointing out how pathetic it was for her to try using that suggestive tone on him, mumbled, “Told ya not to call me that,” then shook off his leather vest and extended it to her too.

And that’s how Beth Greene found herself on Daryl Dixon’s bike, pressing herself tightly to his back and trying to ignore the fact that not only had that man seen her treacherous nipples, but that with the leather vest pushed aside by the wind, he could probably also feel them on his back.

Dixon’s house wasn’t even half as lovely from the outside as Carol’s, and Beth thought to herself that the gun-selling thing was a poor career choice after all, so she wouldn’t be doing that in the future.

Inside, though, Daryl’s home was not entirely what she expected it to be.

“Oh,” Beth murmured, looking around the room. The living room was separated from the attached kitchen area by a wooden kitchen island with stools. The cupboards were made of dark wood, and even though the kitchen was small, it looked nice and clean. There were no cans of beer lying around, no dishes in the sink, no leftovers waiting to be eaten by mice. Beth found herself mesmerized by the sight. Although it didn’t look too expensive, it sure as hell was clean and well cared for. “It looks nice.”

“Yeah, stop lookin’ so fucking surprised,” he told her, and Beth turned to look at him, blushing at the thought that even though she told her friends off for judging the Dixon brothers without really knowing them, she did the same. “So what, you think bikers can’t have nice places, huh?”

“No, I…” the blonde girl started, but Daryl cut her off.

“I try to keep it clean when Merle’s away,” he told her, walking up to the couch only to find two beer cans and a pair of dirty socks that Beth hadn’t noticed before. Daryl scrunched his nose. “That asshole always leaves a mess.”

“And you don’t like it when there’s a mess?”

“It ain’t that. I just figured, if I wanna live here, I gotta make the place livable.” Daryl told her, throwing the beer cans and the socks into the bin. “It ain’t exactly nice to come home from work to a sink full of dishes, smelly leftovers all over the place, and a fridge full of beer, but no food and nowhere to sit, every damn day. Was pissin’ me off.” He shrugged, and Beth smiled.

“Well, it really looks nice. I didn’t mean anything bad by it,” Beth told him, and Dixon nodded.

“Come on, gotta find you some dry clothes.” And so Beth went with him through the rectangular hall to one of the two bedrooms. It was just as clean as the rest of the house, with a king-size bed taking up most of the space in the room, a wooden wardrobe, and a table pushed against the wall. She concluded that it couldn’t be Merle’s bedroom, and it took her a moment to overcome the tension she felt in her body at the thought of sleeping in here tonight.

“Here. Take this. I can give you some pants too, but I don’t think they’ll stay on you anyway.” Maybe it was tiredness or maybe all the events of that day, but I don’t think they’ll stay on you anyway made her think about an entirely different reason why the pants wouldn’t stay on her than Dixon probably had in mind.

The girl looked up at him and saw him standing just two feet away with a black shirt in his hand. Unlike the one he had on, this one didn’t have its sleeves ripped off, and Greene found herself hoping that he didn’t have a lot of those. His arms looked darn fine without the sleeves. They also felt amazing around her in that dark alley from before. Not like Jimmy’s delicate, boyish hands. Not at all. Those were rough, with skin hardened from hard work in the hot sun of Georgia, and thinking about them now made her forget for a moment about all the awful things Jimmy did with his that night.

Daryl snapped his fingers right before her eyes, and she had to blink a few times to come back from this other, weirdly arousing reality.

“What are you waiting for, girl? Get those fucking clothes off and stop dripping wet on my floor.”

At this point, she was sure she must have hurt her head really badly somewhere along the way here. Her brain must have been damaged; there was no other explanation for what she did next. Without thinking about it, Beth Greene popped the button of her jeans and started sliding them down.

“Jesus fucking Christ.” Daryl turned his face away, squeezing his eyes shut, and it wasn’t until he did that she realized what she was doing. The pants were already halfway down, and her drenched underwear with them. “I didn’t mean with me in the room!”

“Oh my God, I’m so sorry, I didn’t think, I…” She started pulling them up, but stopped when Daryl made a strangled noise. She looked up at him, expecting him to be looking at her, and was surprised to see him still facing away and with his eyes closed. He wiggled the hand in which he hold his t-shirt in front of her.

 “Stop talkin’ and change the damn clothes. It’s fine.”

“Okay.” Beth got her pants off and took off her shirt, discarding it on the floor next to her pants.

She reached for the shirt in Daryl’s hand and felt a shiver run through her body when their fingers touched. Beth held her breath, realizing that right now he was probably well aware that she was standing here butt naked right in front of him. It was then that her helpful brain gave the impulse to her mouth to say:

“But I think I’ll need some pants. My panties are soaking wet too.”

Daryl’s fingers jerked a little under hers.

“Yeah, fine. Just put this damn shirt on first, aright?” The biker grunted, the timbre of his hoarse voice vibrating through her and causing this funny feeling down her tummy to grow. What the hell is going on with me? Beth thought, putting his shirt on. As she was doing so, Daryl spoke again, this time with a hint of amusement:

“You know, for someone who ran away from her boyfriend to avoid having sex, you were pretty quick in pulling your fucking pants down just now.”

Beth laughed wholeheartedly at that.

“Yeah, well, maybe I just wasn’t wet enough before,” she muttered jokingly without thinking, and it was only after it left her mouth that Beth realized how that little stupid sentence sounded. Daryl groaned, covering his face with his now-free hand, and Beth was ready to change the subject when he laughed. He did so silently, like he wasn’t really used to it, and Beth couldn’t contain a broad smile from spreading on her face.

“You can look now. I put the shirt on.”

Dixon took his hand away from his face.

“Good.” He turned his head around, but instead of looking at her, his eyes went to the pile of her clothes first. It was then that she wondered how much of her body he really saw. Beth should have been paying more attention to his face when she pulled her jeans down. Now the girl felt too ashamed to ask him about it. “As I said, I doubt my pants will work for you, and anyway, I don’t really have any to sleep in, so you have two options: my underwear or waiting for yours to dry.”

His eyes drifted up her body then, and Beth shivered again under his piercing gaze. His shirt was big enough to cover her butt and just a bit of her thighs, which wasn’t surprising, seeing as he was much broader and taller than her.

“What a great choice,” Beth smiled at him, and Daryl shrugged, wearing his lower lip between his teeth. Beth didn’t think it was a good thing to do—walking around in his shirt, just barely covering her thighs without any underwear—but then again, wearing somebody’s underwear seemed pretty intimate. It seemed like something she could eventually do when being in a long relationship with someone, but only if she was sure that the other person didn’t have any diseases. And she didn’t even know him much. “I’ll wait then.”

The biker nodded, then went ahead and picked up her clothes from the ground.

“I mean, it can’t get any more awkward—not after I stood butt naked in front of you, right?” She was still smiling at him when she said that, and she kept doing so even when the stern look he gave her made her weak in the knees.

“Right. I’ll leave your shit in the bathroom. Fresh towels are in the top drawer. You can sleep in here, and if you feel like havin’ tea, feel free to make some. Same if you’re hungry. You need anything else, I’ll be in Merle’s bedroom.”

Then Daryl left her, and Beth went to the bed, trying—and failing—not to think about sleeping in nothing but Dixon’s t-shirt in his bed, with him in the other room. If anyone ever somehow learned about it, she was going to be in a lot of trouble.

Get a grip, Greene, she thought, shaking her head as if it would help her rid herself of those thoughts. She shouldn’t be feeling safe or comfortable here, and yet she did. She couldn’t help but feel strangely at ease. Beth wasn’t sure whether it was because of the man or the fact that it was his home and not Jimmy’s.

Daryl’s bed was surprisingly comfortable. She didn’t expect it to be soft or inviting, but it felt that way, and it even smelled nice—a mix of soap, pine, and something else she couldn’t quite place. Something musky and familiar. 

Trying not to think too much about that, she buried herself under the blanket, her tired body finally relaxing, and closed her eyes. For a few moments, she just lay there, willing herself to sleep. But the events of the day, the weight of the night, and the strange feelings she was having made it impossible to rest. Her mind kept spinning, jumping from thought to thought until she heard a sound outside the room. The soft creak of the floorboard, then a muffled noise from the bathroom. Daryl must have gone in there to hang up her clothes, she figured.

Beth listened intently, hoping she wasn’t making him uncomfortable by being here. Then there was silence again, and she heard the faint sound of a door closing, probably Merle’s bedroom.

She breathed out slowly, letting herself relax again. Her heart wasn’t racing, she wasn’t scared or nervous. She was just… curious.

Curious? About Daryl Dixon? God, what the hell was she even thinking? Maybe it was just exhaustion making her act like this. Maybe she was in some weird dream state. Yes, that had to be it. Tomorrow she’d wake up, thank him politely, and leave, hopefully never embarrassing herself like this again.

Just sleep, Beth. She sighed, turning onto her side and pulling the blanket tighter around herself. Just sleep.

And for the first time that night, her mind finally quieted, and slowly, she drifted off.

Chapter 5: We have business to attend to

Summary:

Beth wakes up at Daryl Dixon's apartment for the first time in her life. Will spending the night at his place have some bad consequences?

Notes:

Hi folks!
Sorry for not posting yesterday! Had a bit of a family emergency :(
As always thank you for all your lovely comments <3
This story has been sitting on my computer disk for so long, because I was anxious about posting it and it warms my heart to see how much you all love it <3

The door closed with a loud bang. He crossed the room to the small wooden table, his hands shaking with emotions. It was way too perfect to be true. He knew that even before that redneck asshole stepped out of Carol’s house. Still, for those short few moments he had hope. He felt restless after Sophia’s death. Before her he was patient, he would wait, he took his sweet time with the girl before actually making his move. But tonight… Tonight when he saw her, walking in the rain like that. Her little nipples poked through her shirt… It was God’s plan. He knew that. God himself put that girl on his path so that he could teach her a lesson. So that he could cure her, purify her… He started following her. Waiting for the perfect opportunity. Perfect moment to present itself and dreaming, already dreaming, of taking her apart, teaching her, making her understand how bad it was of her to go outside and tempt people like she did.

But then Dixon had to show up. As if he didn’t have enough reasons for hating that good for nothing biker. At first, he didn’t think it would destroy the perfect opportunity. Beth Greene was a smart girl. It was very unlikely that she would trust that man. So he was actually surprised when he saw them coming back from behind the corner they’d disappeared behind a few minutes before. It astonished him how easily little Beth Greene agreed to going with Daryl Dixon. Never, not in a million years, would he assume that these two have known each other before, but from where he was standing they looked pretty damn cosy together. With her smiling at him oh so sinfully and with how she pressed herself to his back without any hesitation. That little demon. She was nothing like Sophia. Poor little Sophia was destroyed by her father. Nobody knew. Of course nobody knew. Except for him. All it took was one look at her. But Beth Greene? There were no scars there. The dark in her had a completely different source. Sophia deserved to be purified. Saved. Freed from this prison on Earth. And Beth Greene? She deserved punishment. Perhaps he shouldn’t rush it either, perhaps he should take his time with her as well.

*

Beth woke up with her cheeks wet from the tears, and she could feel her heart beating fast in her chest. For the moment she lay in bed wide awake, but still not conscious enough to get up. The girl didn’t remember the awful things that happened in her dreams and no matter how hard she tried to bring the dream back the only thing she was able to resurface was the information that somebody died. But soon enough even this was forgotten, because the next thing she realized was that the sunlight was shining through the closed curtains and the third was not something she could see but rather smell.

Breakfast. Someone was making breakfast and it reminded her of her empty stomach. Was Daryl making pancakes? Oh God, if so this day just became real good. Pancakes were her ultimate favorite since childhood.

Beth sneaked out of the room and to the bathroom that was just opposite Daryl’s bedroom. She let herself take a quick shower and then dressed up. When she looked into the mirror she half expected to still see her boobs through the shirt, but now that it was dry the only issue was that her nipples could be still seen without her bra, but their hardness was from the shower and it was probably going away in a few minutes, so she wasn’t too worried about that.

When Beth entered the kitchen, she was met with the sight of Daryl Dixon making pancakes.

“Morning, sleepyhead” the biker welcomed her without turning around to look at her.

Beth scrunched her nose.

“If it’s still morning then I’m not a sleepyhead” Beth told him and it made him snort in amusement, so she smiled feeling like she won something.

“Smartass.” Came back after the moment and Beth tried to act offended as she stood by his side. It was hard to do though, especially when she noticed Daryl lifting one corner of his mouth in a half smile. It looked good on him. “It’s almost eleven, so I wouldn’t be bragging if I were you.”

“You let me sleep till eleven?! Who does that?!” This time she felt really offended. Daryl should wake her up much earlier. What if someone was looking for her? What if Amy alarmed her parents about her missing?

“Wanted to get up early? Shoulda done so by yourself. I ain’t your fucking daddy." Daryl hissed, making her scrunch her nose again. “Now, sit down and eat your pancakes, sweet child o’ mine. We have business to attend to.”

“Don’t call me that.” The biker gave her a look, so instead of arguing further she did take a seat on one of the stools and started eating, not waiting for him to join.

“What business?”

“Friend of mine is trafficking little girls like you to work at brothels.” Beth stopped eating and looked up to him, still making pancakes without a care in the world.

“What?”

The question made Daryl look around and into her eyes, but not for long, so that she couldn’t really tell if he was joking. He turned his back on her again, getting back to pancakes.

“Don’t worry. Not gonna give you up to him. He just needs to see you first, so he can nicely inform me how much I can get for your sweet little ass somewhere higher.”

“Daryl, it’s not funny. Stop joking.”

“I ain’t joking.” He stopped all at once, took the plate with the remaining pancakes and set it before her. Beth didn’t look down too focused on his facial impression. What the hell was going on? Was it even real? Was she still dreaming? “You do realize that’s how I’m making money, right? I mean, yeah I renovate cars and bikes too, but that’s not all I do. I sell things. Illegally. Guns, drugs… You do know that right, sweetheart?”

She was silent, too taken aback to even think about the response. Her brain couldn’t quite get on with what was going on.

“Come on, now. Answer me before I get pissed.”

“I-uh, I heard rumours.” She couldn’t help her shaking voice, but her eyes never left his. One would think that she wanted to give off the impression that she was tough, not scared at all, but in truth she was just too caught up to look away.

“So tell me, what the fuck were you thinking tellin’ me you’re a virgin and then letting me take you home, huh? The fuck was going on in this little head of yours when you got on some stranger’s bike and let him take you off somewhere only he knew?!” She kept looking in his angry eyes when he paced the small kitchen shouting at her. She was sure if it wasn’t for the kitchen island he would get in her face. In just a few minutes the biker made her more shaken than she was the day before, so excuse her if it took her a moment to realize the change in his tone of voice, from threatening to lecturing: “And finally, what on earth compelled you to leave your boyfriend’s house alone in the middle of the night without your jacket or a fucking phone in the first place? What the fuck, Beth? Do you even realize what could’ve happened? Do you even realize how many things I could do to you right now? And guess what? Nobody would ever know, because you didn’t tell anyone where the fuck where you going! Nobody saw you and as far as everyone is concerned I’ve never met you that night.”

“Those two men saw us.” She told him in a hushed voice, but it didn’t take him out of his tracks.

“Oh? You think they saw anything? After they were running away for their life so that I wouldn’t pull their eyes out of their skulls, huh? Do you think they saw us, huh?” Daryl hit the table with his fist making her jump a little.

“N-no, nobody saw us.”

Beth couldn’t look at him any more.

"Yeah, you’re right, so nobody will ever even think about questioning me. And you? You’ll just disappear. I’ll sell you to some creep and get a lot of money for your sixteen-year-old ass,”

“Seventeen,” Beth argued weakly, earning herself a glare.

“Sure, but you know what else? Do you?!”

Beth made herself look up at him.

“No, I don’t.” She told him in a shaky voice and just from the look on his face, from the way he licked his lips, Beth knew what he was going to say even before the words left his mouth.

“Before I give you up I’ll make a party of it, invite some friends, and teach ya how to be a good lil’ whore.”
Beth scrunched her eyebrows.

“You can’t do this if you want to sell my virginity.”

Daryl fell silent for the moment watching her with those piercing blue eyes of his, and she could almost see him thinking about the comeback to that, about something believable to tell. When he raised his right hand to his mouth to bite his thumb, Beth realized that he came up short.

“Shut up, smartass.” Daryl mumbled at last and Beth started laughing. It was all she could do after having the most terrifying minutes of her entire life. Of course, it angered Daryl, or at least that’s how he tried to act: “I’m giving you the most important lesson of your life, so you can take that logic and shove it up your ass!”

“Oh my God! I hate you, you know that, right?” Beth informed him after she calmed herself down enough to talk. “What you did was so awful!”

Daryl rested his hands on the island’s top leaning on them a little with an amused smile, and it was so weird to think that this man could be like that when just a minute ago he was the most terrifying person she’s ever encountered.

“You can’t pull shit like that and not get punished, now eat your damn pancakes and know that if I ever see you out alone in the middle of the night again…”

“You will make me your whore and sell my virginity after?” Beth interrupted him blushing at her own words and laughing through embarrassment. Daryl glared at her.

“Careful now. Nothing’s stopping me from doing at least one of the two.”

“You didn’t seem too eager to do so yesterday, and I was already almost naked and in your bed.” She teased him, starting to eat again. She had no idea what was happening to her. Beth would’ve never thought it would be so easy for her to just indulge into friendly banter with someone like Daryl Dixon. Yet here she was sitting in his kitchen in the morning teasing him like it was her place to be. Like it was completely normal to be talking about sex and nakedness with a much older biker.

This time Daryl took a plate for himself and sat down on the other stool to eat with her.

“Who’s sayin’ I’m talkin’ about the first? I can get millions for your virginal ass. You know how many whores I could buy then?”

“Eww, you’re gross. At least my virginal ass wouldn’t infect you with any diseases. Can’t say so about whores, can you?”

Daryl snorted, but didn’t say anything to that, focusing on his plate instead. Before Beth did the same she turned to look at him and when his eyes found hers the girl told him: “I get it, what you were trying to do just now, to make sure I’ll never put myself in danger like that. Thank you.”
Daryl nodded and mumbled something under his breath. Beth didn’t quite get that, but if she had to guess then it sounded suspiciously like: “Just eat the damned pancakes.”

A few hours later Beth Greene mounted Daryl Dixon’s bike for the second time in her life. He drove her to back to Jimmy’s house first, her nerves returning in full force once they left Daryl’s apartment.

Her mom was probably trying to contact her the first thing in the morning, and thank God it was Saturday. The girl would be in much more trouble if she hadn’t shown up in church on Sunday. But with it being the day before service the only thing that could make her life really miserable was Amy answering calls from Beth’s mom and alarming everyone about the youngest Greene’s disappearance. She was worrying about it the whole way from Daryl’s house to Jimmy’s, and only when Daryl pulled the bike to a stop right on the corner of Jimmy’s street did Beth realize that she will have to face her ex-boyfriend and inform him that he was her ex now.

“Couldn’t you go in there with me and scare him a little?” Beth asked the biker, but he shook his head, not quite meeting her eyes.

Daryl didn’t want any of her hangover friends to see them together, so she had to walk down the street to Jimmy’s house and get her stuff alone which was probably the sensible thing to do. Still, Beth was disappointed by that, if she had to be honest. She’d love to see their faces, especially Jimmy’s, when she’d ride up to her ex-boyfriend doors with that man.

“Your friends already call you Dixon’s girl, would only get worse if they saw me beating that jackass to a pulp.”

“You know about that?!” Beth was so shocked, she forgot to blush. Daryl still wasn’t looking at her, which made it easier not to do so.

“Yeah, Carol told me. She heard that stupid boyfriend of yours sayin’ some shit.”

Beth remembered the day Carol could have heard them, because Beth noticed her right before talking back to Jimmy. She wanted to silence him so that the Peletier wouldn’t hear anything, but he just wouldn’t shut up, so Beth finally snapped at him. She’s never done that before or after, just this one time, and it was after this that the teasing magically stopped for the next few days. Up to this point Beth was hoping that Daryl’s friend didn’t hear anything, but she guessed she was wrong after all.

“Ex-boyfriend.” Beth corrected him automatically and that made him look up at her finally.

“Fine, ex then, but I ain’t repeating myself.”

Beth smiled. He was so funny sometimes.

“Okay, so… you’ll wait then?”

“Told you I will, didn’t I?”

Beth smiled even though he still kept avoiding her gaze. He did that a lot, she noticed, he talked to her with his head turned a little sidewise as if preparing for a blow. Even when he was joking, the nervous energy never seemed to leave him.

“I’ll be right back.”

When Beth got to Jimmy’s house everyone was up and although a few people were trying to clean the mess left in the living room, most of them sat around the table with pained look on their faces while Amy was shouting at Jimmy for letting Beth out, for not telling her anything and complaining about what is she going to tell Beth’s parents about their missing daughter. It took them a moment to notice her entering. Probably because of so many people walking through that door the whole morning. If it was up to Beth, she would just sneak out to Jimmy’s room to take her stuff and then leave again, but Amy had her phone in her hand, so that couldn’t be done. So instead she stood there for a moment waiting for Amy to shut up. When her friend finally did, Beth went:

“Can I have my phone back now?”

“Oh my God, I’ve been so worried! You, asshole!” Amy threw herself on Beth hugging her tightly. “Where the hell have you been all this time?!”

“We were already organizing the search party.” Thomas added, Beth smiled at them both.

Well, Beth hasn't actually come up with any excuse while getting back to Jimmy’s. She was way too focused on Daryl. And anyway, even if she tried to come up with something it would be rather hard seeing as the only reasonable explanation would be getting home, and Beth’s mom wouldn’t call if the girl was home. So the one thing that sounded good couldn’t even be taken into consideration. She could probably lie that it was Rick that took care of her, but Grimes would have probably come in here with her to give everyone a piece of mind, if that was the case.

“I went for a walk.”

“You want us to believe that you’ve spent the whole night walking around?” Cordelia snorted from her place right next to Jimmy.

“No, but I don’t feel like telling you the truth. Wouldn’t believe me anyway” Beth told Cordelia. They weren’t on good terms since Beth started dating Jimmy. The other girl just couldn’t overcome her jealousy. Now, she was sitting on one of the two chairs, right next to Jimmy who was watching her wearily from the other chair. Beth averted her eyes quickly the second she met Jimmy’s accusatory stare. She hoped that the quarterback was too hungover to even think of talking to her about the events from last night. Beth for one thing would gladly let this subject drop, especially since they weren’t alone in the room.

She extracted herself from Amy’s grip, but the girl was still eyeing her suspiciously.

“I don’t like you being all mysterious like that, Beth. Do you feel alright? Did something happen?”

Beth smiled at Amy sweetly, hoping to convey to her that she was in fact quite alright.

“Everything’s fine, but I have to go. We’re collecting Maggie from the airport in two hours.”

“I know. We can give you a lift home.” Beth shook her head.

“No need. I have an Uber waiting for me,” she lied easily, surprised by her own fast thinking. She squeezed Amy’s arms reassuringly: “I’ll just go get my things from upstairs. I’ll see you next week, yeah?”

“Yeah,” Amy said, a little unsure.

And with that she turned around and quickly walked to the stairs. As soon as she was out of their sight, she started running. She didn’t want to spend any more time in this house than she had to.
Beth got to Jimmy’s room and snatched her purse, her bra and her jacket. Then she turned around and rushed downstairs, not wanting to give Jimmy enough time to collect himself and come up to talk to her.
She almost collided with him on the last few steps though.

“Woah!” he raised his hands, trying to catch her, but she stepped around him quickly, not wanting to let him separate her from the door. She was never letting him trap her between his body and freedom ever again.

“Bye, everyone!” she called out to the room behind him, doing everything in her power to not meet his eyes. She then turned around and all but ran to the doors.

“Beth, wait!” Jimmy shouted after her, not unlike Daryl the previous night, but she ignored him.

Once outside, she quickly found Daryl, still standing in the spot she left him in, at the corner of the street. He was leaning back on his bike, a cigarette hanging lousily from his mouth, a small grimace on his face as he watched his boots, the wind playing with his hair. When the doors shut behind her with a loud bang, he looked up and Beth instantly felt more at ease than just a minute ago when Jimmy ambushed her in the hall. She already started walking towards him when the doors behind her opened again.

“What do you think you’re doing?!” Jimmy’s angry voice made her walk faster, the sound of it reminding her of last night a little too much.

“I told you, I’m going home,” she told him, not even sparing him a glance. Instead, she watched Daryl eye her carefully, his face unreadable. His eyes snapped to

Jimmy just as the younger boy’s hand closed around her arm and brought her to a halt.

“What? Just like that? You don’t have anything to say to me?!”

She spun around, all but reaping her arm from his grip.

“And what on Earth would I want to say to you?”

How dare he? After everything, he’s said and done?

“How about I’m sorry I acted like a bitch? Or is apologizing beneath our dear Virgin Mary?”

Beth recoiled, feeling as if he slapped her. Even though he acted like an ass to her the day before it still came as a surprise that he didn’t seem to regret his actions when sober. More than that, he seemed to still feel like Beth wronged him, not the other way around. She thought that the hardest part would be telling him she doesn’t want to date him any more, doesn’t want to talk about what happened either, and him being genuinely sorry, begging her to forgive him and keep going out with him. She never thought that he would want her to apologize to him. What on Earth was going on with him? Has she even known him at all?

“No. You just don’t deserve any. I just came here for my stuff, so…”

Beth tried to speak calmly even though part of her wanted to go off on him the same way he was going off on her. She found herself too scared of shouting back though. Didn’t want to get any unwanted attention from the neighbors, or worse, from their friends.

“Oh yeah, right, so you can go back to your daddy, pretend you’re a good girl and look down on everyone else. Huh, Greene?” Beth opened her mouth to say that he’s wrong. He’s the one looking down on everyone who’s different. He’s the one looking down on her just because she didn’t want to have sex. However, before she could even think of formulating those thoughts into the sentence, he was talking again: “You think you’re such a goodie, but you know what you really are?! PATHETIC.”

Her shoulders hunched on their own violation. Suddenly she felt very small. And not because of his opinion on her, but because deep down she thought he might be right. Maybe she was pathetic. Maybe there was something wrong with her for not wanting him like that. But it didn’t mean she deserved to be shouted at…

“Jimmy, stop…” Beth started, but he caught her off.

“What? You thought you could just come here and I would be nice and all just because you’re you, huh?! Because you’re so perfect, right?! That’s it, that’s the truth. You just think you're above everyone else, don’t you? You think you can just get all the nice things and not give anything back? That I’m just going to be there doing all your bidding and wait patiently for your grace? I’m so done with you, goodie-two-shoes! You either say you’re sorry and get over yourself or we’re done, you hear me, Beth?!”

“Yeah, we’re done”, she wasn’t sure how she managed to sound so peaceful when everything in her screamed. She was seconds away from tearing up. But she somehow managed to answer him, and then she tried turning away from him, leaving this conversation. But he didn’t let her. He grabbed her again, this time more harshly, and when she went to pull back, he squeezed her arm in his hand.

“Let go, Jimmy!”

“No, you’re not going to run away again! What the hell do you even mean we’re done?! I…”

“It hurts, let..”

The hand went down on Jimmy’s arm and pried him away from her in one swift motion. Jimmy was pushed back and stumbled a little, looking completely stunned.

“She told you to let go, asshole.” Even though his voice was unusually calm, somehow Daryl Dixon managed to still sound threatening enough for Jimmy to shut up on the spot. Her ex looked at the biker as if he'd just seen a ghost. After a long pause on his end, Daryl got impatient. “Wha’? You have a hearin’ problem or somethin’? Back off and get your skinny ass inside.”

His brows furrowed, and he stumbled a little back completely dumb folded.

“Look, it’s not your business, alright? Just leave us alone, dude”

“What did you just call me, prick? I ain’t your dude, and she said she don’t want to talk to ya, so I’m thinkin’: you leave ‘er alone.”

Jimmy startled again, and took another step back. It gave her a weird sense of satisfaction to watch him squirm like that. She had enough of him though. All she wanted to do was to turn around and leave, but just when she opened her mouth to say ‘Yeah, thanks for everything, Jimmy. See you around’ in the most passive aggressive way she could, her now ex-boyfriend surprised her once again by turning to her and saying with panic: “Come on, let’s talk about it inside.”

“What?” The change in his tone was so huge, Beth couldn’t believe her ears. Did he really offer her to go back to his place after attacking her verbally a few minutes earlier? What was wrong with him?

Jimmy gave Daryl a side glance and moved a bit further away from him and closer to Beth as if that could give them a little more privacy.

“Stop being difficult, Beth. You know you’re not really going to break up with me. Let’s just talk inside.” He moved to take her by her arm again, but she stepped away and to her right, stumbling a little as she backed herself straight into Daryl. Dixon steadied her with his hand on her elbow, his touch gentle, almost apologetic. Beth moved away slightly, only far enough to be able to turn around and smile at him with gratitude.

“Sorry,” she whispered to him, and he shook his head in answer.

“It’s fine,”

Jimmy snorted.

“I bet it’s fine…” Beth snapped her attention right back to him and shot him a glare. She silently prayed that he would leave it like that. If he said anything about Sophia and the accusations, Beth didn’t think she could keep Daryl from beating him up.

“Just go home, Jimmy,” she told him and was about to turn around and leave when Jimmy decided to speak again:

“Fine, you don’t have to talk to me. Just come back inside, I’ll order you a cab”

She’s had enough. First, he shouts at her. Calls her names. And now he’s so concerned for her he won’t let her leave? Screw that.

“I don’t need a cab, Jimmy. I already have a ride,” and with that she clasped her hand around Daryl’s. Yet again it gave her a great deal of satisfaction to watch Jimmy as he opened and closed his mouth, gaping like a fish as his eyes followed the movement of her hand. As she pulled Daryl back to the motorcycle parked on the other side of the street, Jimmy finally found his voice again and shouted after her:

“You’re kidding, right? You’re not letting him take you anywhere?!”

“Oh.” Beth laughed, turning her head to Jimmy to shout back. “Actually, Jimmy, I am. It feels way safer than staying here with someone who I thought was my friend, but instead cared only for getting into my pants.”

She almost raised her other hand to show him a middle finger too but restrained herself and instead turned around to look at Daryl again. To her utter surprise Daryl didn’t try to wiggle himself out of her grip and that alone made her feel rather light headed. She had a vague feeling that she’s going to regret rubbing her new-found “friendship” with Daryl into Jimmy’s face, but she didn’t care at the moment. Seeing his jaw drop felt so satisfying, she didn’t want to think about the consequences. It might have made her feel less victorious.

Walking back to the motorbike, her heart was pounding fast in her chest with no apparent reason. Or rather, no reason that she wanted to name. It was twice now that Daryl came to her defense and if he kept doing that Beth would have a hard time pretending that she didn’t like it.

“I don’t think that will make him think you’re just having a cigarette break close by, you know?” She commented as they stopped next to the bike.

Daryl huffed and out of the corner of her eyes Beth saw him looking rather embarrassed.

“Yeah, don’t think so either. I just…” Daryl mumbled under his breath. “I’m sorry.”

“No, it’s okay.” Beth finally managed to look him in the eyes. She smiled reassuringly. “More than okay actually…”

Their eyes met and when the corner of Daryl’s lips raised to a half smile Beth felt her heart skip a beat. No, stop that.

Jimmy watched her as she joined Daryl on the bike and pressed herself close to him. Beth, seeing his dumbfounded expression, couldn’t help it but wave at him. The boy scrunched his nose in response and Beth laughed silently. Daryl started his bike without another word and they were off, heading to the Greene’s farm.

Fortunately, mom wasn’t home when they got there and her father didn’t seem half as shocked as Jimmy. Hershel didn’t question her when she told him that she was just about to call a cab from a coffee shop that they went to with Lilly and Amy when she saw Daryl. He was buying coffee for himself and told her that after that he was heading to the farm to help her daddy, so Beth asked if she could go with him. On his bike. The only reaction the story got out of Hershel was a wholehearted laugh and the words “You’re sure lucky that your mother isn’t here, Bethy. She would have you grounded for riding that thing.” Beth blushed yet again, reminded of just how many things would get her grounded if only her parents knew about all of the events that unfolded last night. This whole time Daryl didn’t utter a word to her and every time she looked at him, the biker was looking at something else. At everything but not her. Didn’t even spare her a glance when she thanked him for the ride and muttered a hopeful “see you around”. In response he only nodded once, mumbled something along the lines of “yeah, sure” but she couldn’t be sure if she heard that right. Then Dixon followed her father to the barn.

Chapter 6: I didn't mean to scare you

Summary:

Beth has to face the consequences of her actions, but even during one of the worst weeks of her life, she can't stop thinking about Daryl. Against all reason, she's developing a huge crush on the man. Will she be able to keep it a secret?

Notes:

I have to change the "update day" to Sundays, because the world keeps getting in the way of me posting new chapters on Saturdays.
Sorry for the delay! Been having a hectic time, but all is well for now, fortunately :)
Hope you all had a lovely week <3 I want you to know that your comments make me smile every time - even if I don't have the time to always respond right away. You're amazing people!

Beth didn’t check her phone until she was in her father’s truck, driving with her dad to pick up Maggie from the airport. Beth’s sister was coming back from a trip with her friends, and she was going to stay with them for a few days before going back to college. Mum, who had just gotten back from the groceries when they were leaving, stayed to prepare dinner.

Beth didn’t even blink when she saw eight unanswered calls from Amy, three from Thomas, and four from her mom. Her mom had already given her the talk about answering the phone before they left to get Maggie (“You have that phone for a reason, you know, Betty?”). There was also a text message from Maggie, and that’s what Beth focused on:

Prepare for a girl’s night out, B! Xoxo.

The blonde girl smiled to herself. It had been over a month since Maggie was home, so Beth was pretty excited to see her again. Since Maggie went off to college, their bond, instead of getting weaker, had grown stronger. It was the distance that made them both realize how important they were to each other. Before that, Maggie would often ditch Beth’s company to party with her friends.

Unlike Beth, the older daughter of Hershel was rather difficult growing up. She didn’t stray from alcohol and would often end up in trouble doing things Beth would have never even thought of, last night’s escapade included.

It was funny, in a way, how different the Greene kids were from each other. Beth, the youngest, was the quiet one, the one who always did what she was told, attended church every Sunday, was one of the best students in her class, and had never even tried drinking or smoking. Shawn, Beth’s half-brother and Maggie’s stepbrother, was the helpful one. After he finished high school, instead of leaving for college, he stayed at the farm to help their father. Unlike his sisters, the boy enjoyed spending his days working hard on a farm, and when night came, he’d retreat to his room to invest what little energy he still had into playing games, streaming them, and talking to strangers. Then there was Maggie, the troublemaker, who often stayed the night outside without informing their dad first, who was almost never home, and if she was, the brunette would tell Beth the weirdest, most disturbing things she did the night before.

Maggie even dated one of the Feral Angels’ members briefly, and Beth was well aware that not everything her sister knew about the biker club came from gossip. Some of it Maggie had seen with her own eyes, and she somehow managed to keep that a secret from their parents and the town folk as well. Beth wondered what her older sister would say now if she knew about last night.

Seeing as Beth knew too many embarrassing secrets of hers that would get Maggie in trouble, she was pretty sure that Maggie wouldn’t tell their father about it. But would she get angry? Or would she be proud of Beth for doing something against the rules for the first time in her life? Beth wanted to tell someone so badly; it was hard to hold it in as it was.

However, she thought back to her friends and the questioning looks they were sending her when she went back to Jimmy’s. She knew that the next time they saw each other, Lilly and Amy would bring it up. She could hardly avoid them for the whole Spring Break. She wasn’t sure if it was safe to tell them, though. Her best friends were loyal to the core, but Amy would sometimes overshare the information with Thomas, forgetting that he was not only her boyfriend but also Jimmy’s best friend, and Lilly had her head full of an anti-Dixon agenda, thanks to both of her parents, who believed the rumors about his involvement with Sophia’s death.

The last thing Beth wanted was to get Daryl in trouble, though. So Beth kept her mouth shut not only on that Saturday afternoon but also the next day when she went out with Maggie, and then through the whole Spring Break, because the longer she held it in, the harder it was to share with someone. The fact that the longer she hadn’t seen Daryl, the more it seemed like that whole night was just a silly dream only added to that feeling. She was in the town center a lot in those few days, and although she had kept seeing him almost every time she was out before, now it was like he ceased to exist. She somehow even missed him at the farm, even though he came in twice to help her dad with something.

It was on the last day of Maggie’s visit that Beth finally saw him, and it was thanks to the older Greene’s poor driving skills that they ended up at the Dixon’s garage. As they arrived at the place, a man walked out of the building and welcomed them with a silent nod towards Beth’s sister. Maggie smiled at him in return, shrugging her shoulders.

“What can I say, Garry? It has been too long since I got myself in trouble.” The man started laughing, and Maggie showed him the fender dent from the post that she hit.

“Excuse me. Is there a bathroom I could use?” Beth interrupted her sister's middle sentence, and the man called Garry instructed her on how to get to the loo. She thanked him and dove right into the building, with no need of using the toilet.

Beth started snooping around, almost one hundred percent sure she wouldn’t be lucky enough to meet Daryl in here but willing to take the chance to look for him.

The garage wasn’t too big, so after entering the room in which they worked, it wasn’t hard to spot someone. Beth’s heartbeat fastened when her eyes rested on the back of the man she had been thinking about every day since last Saturday.

The biker hadn’t noticed her, too focused on his work, his head under the car’s hood. “Sweet Child o’ Mine” was playing from the small radio sitting on the floor next to Daryl’s legs, and she remembered how he called her that the morning she woke up at his place, how she didn’t like him calling her a “child.” Now, listening to the lyrics in the doorway, Beth wasn’t so sure she was against it anymore.

She's got a smile that it seems to me

Reminds me of childhood memories

Where everything

Was as fresh as the bright blue sky

Beth smiled to herself, hearing Daryl murmur the lyrics of the song quietly with a cigarette hanging from his lips. God, he was sexy like this, with dirty arms glistening from sweat and ripped-off sleeves emphasizing his flexed muscles. Beth’s eyes slid from his arms to his chest and then wandered down shamelessly.

Now and then, when I see her face,

She takes me away to that special place

And if I stared too long

I'd probably break down and cry

The setting gave Daryl even more of that rough, bad boy vibe she’d never felt so entranced by before, but now as she started watching him work on the car, it felt like she would never be able to look away. And even if she did, the damage was already done because how on earth could she ever find any other man attractive with this picture burned into her brain?

The girl walked up to him silently, trying not to disturb the image she was presented with. It was a good thing that the radio was blasting music so loudly because even with the best hearing in the world, Daryl couldn’t hear her now. Beth didn’t want to scare him; no, that wasn’t the case, but she didn’t want to let him know she was there just yet. It was too good to see him so relaxed to destroy it so soon.

She's got eyes of the bluest skies

As if they thought of rain

I'd hate to look into those eyes

And see an ounce of pain

Daryl started mumbling even more, not quite remembering all the lyrics correctly, but it only made it that much cuter. How could he even accomplish that? Beth wondered. To be hot as hell and cute at the same time?

“Hi,” Beth said softly, coming to a stop right by Daryl’s side. Although it wasn’t her goal, it took him by surprise so much that he raised his head too quickly, bouncing it onto the hood. Daryl yelped in pain, giving her an accusatory look.

“The hell you’re trying to do, sneaking up on me like that, girl? Huh?”

Daryl straightened up, massaging his head and watching her intensively.

“Sorry. I didn’t mean to scare you.”

“Didn’t ya?” The man muttered, taking the last puff of smoke and then dropping the cigarette to the ground to squash it with his boot. He kept his eyes on her while breathing out the smoke, and Beth couldn’t help a little blush creeping onto her cheeks. She liked it; God help her, she liked feeling those piercing blue eyes on her too much.

Beth smiled shyly, shaking her head, and one corner of his mouth twitched as if Daryl was trying to keep himself from smiling back.

“What are you doing here? You damaged your daddy’s car or something?”

“Not really.” It was almost surreal how hard it was to avert her eyes from his once they met. It was as if she was compelled to look into his baby blues to the point of it being unbearable. “My sister did. She’s talking to one of your coworkers. Garry, I think.”

Daryl nodded, taking a red rag out of his back pocket and cleaning his hands with it, not breaking eye contact either.

“And, let me guess, you just couldn’t keep yourself from snooping around in the meantime?”

Beth bit down on her lower lip, trying to keep herself from smiling. She probably looked stupid doing it all the time and without any real reason other than the fact that she was happy to see him.

“I didn’t want to snoop around.”

“No?” He raised an eyebrow at her, not quite believing her.

“No. I was hoping you’d be here.” That took him aback; Beth could almost see his brain trying to work out if she was lying and if not, then why would she want to see him.

“Why? You wanna hire me to beat that asshole boyfriend of yours to a pulp?”

Daryl averted his eyes from hers, looking to the ground instead, and suddenly a grimace distorted his fine mouth. It pained her to think that the man couldn’t see another reason for her to want to see him other than using him for her own purposes. She immediately wanted to change it, even if it meant baring her heart to him.

Greene snorted, hoping it would get his attention. It did. Soon enough, his eyes were on her again. It was truly addictive.

“No. Who cares about him?” Beth could see a question forming in Daryl’s eyes, so she added, changing her tone completely from mocking to soft: “I just wanted to see you. Ask how you’re doing. You know, the usual.”

“The usual.” Daryl repeated after her as if he didn’t quite understand what she was saying. Well, Beth couldn’t blame him, really. She imagined that it was rather unpopular for teenage girls to approach Daryl Dixon and strike up a conversation with him just because they wanted to know if he was alright.

“Yeah. So? What’s up?” She tried to sound casual, but if his expression was anything to go by, Daryl didn’t quite buy it. He still let her have her way.

“Not much. Been out of town for a few days.” He shrugged. “You?”

“I’m on Spring Break, but it’s been kind of boring, to be honest.”

He eyed her from the side, his gaze warming her from the inside and his hoarse voice making her whole body vibrate with emotion. Thankfully, he didn’t seem aware of it.

“Mhm. No more parties?”

“No, wouldn’t want to risk it, you know? This mean, scary biker told me if he ever saw me out in the middle of the night again…” She trailed off, smiling cheekily at him, even though she was pretty sure her cheeks were the color of a ripe tomato.

“Mean and scary, huh?”

“He thinks he is.”

I think he’s sweet.

Beth opened her mouth to say just that but didn’t get the chance, as right at that moment they heard Maggie calling her name. Just as Maggie walked into the room, Beth stepped back from Daryl, only now realizing how close they had gotten during their conversation, as if some invisible force was pushing them nearer and nearer with every word they exchanged.

“Here you are,” Maggie smiled at her and then nodded at Daryl in a wordless greeting. “Garry’s got some free time now and can take care of the truck. It’ll take a few hours, though, so I thought we could drop by that coffee shop we drove by on our way here and wait there. You’re okay with that plan?”

Maggie didn’t seem to notice or care about the fact that Beth had clearly stayed back to talk to Daryl. Beth was thankful for that.

“Sure, let’s go do that,” she told Maggie, and once her sister turned around to leave, Beth gave Daryl an apologetic look and whispered, “Sorry. Gotta go.”

Beth felt his eyes on her back the whole way out, but he didn’t say anything else. She regretted having to leave in such a rush, so she wondered if she could perhaps find an excuse to come back in here again. Maybe she should try to break that truck after Maggie leaves?

If the Guns N’ Roses song played on repeat in Beth’s brain for the rest of the day, nobody had to know.

Where do we go now?
Where do we go?
Sweet child o' mine

“Okay, that’s enough, Beth.” The blonde girl snapped out of her thoughts about handsome bikers at the familiar sound of her sister’s voice. “You’ve been staring at this cup for at least fifteen minutes now. It must have gone completely cold by now, and you love hot chocolate way too much for that to not be concerning.”

Beth tried hard not to blush and failed miserably. She decided she couldn’t spill to her sister about any of what had happened in the last few weeks. Not that anything really happened, right? Daryl Dixon had helped her out twice, so what? It didn’t mean anything. Maybe except for the fact that he wasn’t as bad as everyone seemed to think. Maybe deep inside his heart, he was one of the good guys. The type of man who didn’t let a young girl walk home alone in the middle of the night. The type of man who would give you a ride back to your boyfriend’s place so that you wouldn’t have to walk through the bad neighborhood. So that you could get home quicker. The type of man who didn’t expect anything in return. He had done right by her, not once, but a few times now, and they’d only met a handful of times in general.

The sad thing was that nobody knew. Everyone in this city looked at him and saw a bad man. A good-for-nothing biker who was probably murdering girls left and right. She felt, yet again, just how unfair it was. It wasn’t like she could change it, though. Nobody would believe her anyway. Just like they didn’t believe her when she told them that he was decent and more than polite with her when they met in the woods that night. So no, she couldn’t tell anybody. However, she wanted to show him that there were kind people out there who wouldn’t judge a book by its cover. She wanted him to know how much she appreciated what he did for her. That, and she also wanted to see him again. Desperately.

Fingers snapped right in front of her face, and Beth found herself jumping a little.

“What’s going on with you, B? I swear, if you keep spacing out like this…”

“I’m fine, Maggie.” Beth interrupted her sister's middle sentence. When Maggie just kept staring at her, waiting for an explanation, Beth rolled her eyes. “Just got a lot of things on my mind, you know?”

Maggie furrowed her eyebrows.

“Things like what? Just don’t tell me you’re still pining for that Jimmy boy.” Beth gave her sister a surprised look. They had already talked about it, so why would Maggie mention him again? “I know you said it didn’t matter to you, but yesterday Amy mentioned that he was already smooching someone new, and you seemed very upset by this. Seriously, Beth, he’s not worth your attention if he can’t see how amazing you are and…”

Beth sighed. Here it was again: Jimmy. How she hated talking about him and remembering his disgusting kisses and touches from the night of the party. Beth wanted to erase it from her memory, never mention or look at that boy again, but everyone seemed set on talking about him. She knew she was making faces when Amy spoke about his newfound relationship with Cordelia, but it wasn't jealousy speaking through Beth. She was simply disgusted by him.

“No, I’m not pining for him, Maggs. I’m over him, really. It’s just, you know, school stuff. I’m worried about the exams and college and… stuff.”

Even in her own ears, Beth didn’t sound believable, and she could see in Maggie’s eyes that she didn’t believe her either. Not entirely, at least.

“Right, if school makes you space out like that, I’d say you’ve got nothing to worry about.” Beth didn’t manage to stop the blush this time either. The blushing thing was her worst curse. Fortunately, Maggie didn’t comment any further. Instead, they finished off their hot chocolate and made it back to Dixon’s garage. This time she didn’t get to see Daryl. They made it back home just in time for dinner and Maggie didn't mention Beth's brief conversation with Daryl even once.

Beth wasn’t prepared for what awaited her at school. In fact, she didn’t even think much about school these past few days. The only thing on her mind was the time she spent with one of the most feared people in their town. Beth just couldn’t get the man out of her mind. She’d never thought that much about any boy, definitely not about Jimmy and not about anyone else she had crushed on in the past. But with Daryl, she wasn’t even sure it was much of a crush. He didn’t look like the kind of guy she would ever be interested in, and he wasn’t traditionally handsome either, but something in him made all of her insides turn upside down.

Sitting at Mass the day before returning to school, Beth couldn’t focus on what was being said. She sat there recalling all of the moments that made her feel all tingly inside, and she couldn’t for the life of her figure out why they made her feel like that. However, one thing was undeniable: she liked it. Liked him. Liked holding his hand and liked feeling his body next to hers, pressed oh so close. She liked when he came to her defense, twice, when he smiled in that sweet way of his while making pancakes, and most of all, Beth liked the way he looked at her the night of their little sleepover and how he kept watching her curiously after that. She liked it even though she had no idea what that look meant.

She was just as deep in her thoughts while driving to school, while walking through the corridor to retrieve her books from her locker, and while sitting in her first lesson of the day, so it was no surprise that she didn’t notice anything wrong at first.

It wasn’t until a scrap of paper landed on her desk and she opened it that she started realizing just how stupid it was of her to hold Daryl Dixon’s hand in front of her ex-boyfriend.

How about a 21 questions game? I’ll start: Did you like sucking Dixon’s dick?

Said the piece of paper. Beth blushed heavily, not only because of the swear word, but also because of the implication. She couldn’t help the dirty picture that flashed in her mind for just a second. Her on her knees. With Daryl standing right in front of her with his pants down.

Beth quickly shoved the piece of paper into her journal, not wanting the teacher to see it and take it from her, or for anyone else to discover what it contained. After she calmed down enough to be sure she wasn’t red as a tomato, Beth turned around to glare at Jimmy. The boy caught her eyes, smirked, and then started making an obnoxious gesture with his hand and mouth. How dare he? After everything he did during the night of the party?

Oh, she was going to give that little jerk a piece of her mind during recess. But as soon as the break arrived, she was approached by Amy.

“Girl’s bathroom. Now,” was the only thing Amy said before turning around and walking away.

Beth abided by her wishes and followed suit, trying not to pay any mind to Jimmy and his friends snickering behind her. She went into the girls’ bathroom and was met not only by Amy but also by Lilly, who apparently was waiting for them to come. Beth had never seen either of them looking so serious and clouded with anger.

“Did you hear what that asshole has been saying?!” Lilly jumped in with barely contained rage. “It’s outrageous!”

“What? What are you talking about?” Beth suspected whatever made both her friends so angry was connected to the note she was given during class, but she wanted to hear it from them first.

“You didn’t hear, then?” Amy asked, her voice serious but calm.

“Hear what?”

“It’s Jimmy. He’s…” Amy caught herself and exchanged looks with Lilly.

“Jimmy is what?”

“He’s spreading some nasty rumors about you, Bethy. He told everyone that…” Amy fell silent for a moment. “That you two had sex and he found out that you were lying to him about being a virgin.”

“What?! We did not have sex!”

“Yeah, we know, and we tried telling people!” Lilly all but shouted. “But he keeps telling everyone that you kept him waiting when all that time you were sleeping with—”

The words stuck in Lilly’s throat.

“Well, that’s when most people called him a liar, except his closest friends and a few girls from the cheerleading team, but he’s said you gave it up to Dixon. That Dixon threatened him and told him, I’m quoting, that you’re his bitch and all boys should keep away from you. I mean, we know that Dixon only gave you a ride, but the way Jimmy spun the tale… It’s awful,” Amy finished in a surprisingly silent tone of voice, as if she was ashamed of saying it all out loud.

Beth’s mouth fell open.

“On the bright side, it did sound like a work of fiction, so I don’t think it will be much of a problem, but we thought you should know,” Amy added, trying to brighten up the mood.

Beth sighed. For some reason, she didn’t want to tell them about that little piece of paper stuck somewhere in her backpack. In fact, she didn’t want to talk about Daryl at all. She had already told them a made-up version of what happened on the night of the party when they first met during Spring Break. She really wanted to tell them the truth but couldn’t bring herself to do it. Instead, she came up with a story about how she walked all the way to her house and slept for a few hours in a barn. Her original plan. However, she did add that Daryl worked on the farm for the last few days, and that since she couldn’t ask her parents for help in retrieving her phone without giving it all away, she asked Daryl.

They were both stunned by that last statement, so Beth didn’t regret not telling them the whole truth, and now with the rumors she had just learned about, Beth knew it was the right choice. They would have both had heart attacks if they knew she had spent the night at the biker’s place, and she wouldn’t blame them for it. She didn’t quite get her head around that either.

By the end of that day, Beth wished that she could go back to the time when her friends teased her about being a ‘Dixon’s girl’ just because she stood up for him. Now some of the more popular people in high school were sniggering behind her back and calling her a whore instead. Amy and Lilly bravely threatened and cursed anyone that dared to do that, but it didn’t lessen the burn that the hurtful words brought. Amy kept telling her that people would soon realize it was just a bunch of lies, and Lilly called everyone who did believe it an idiot. But to Beth, it didn’t really matter that they believed it. It was their reaction to the news, the need to insult her and tease her about it in the most disgusting ways, that brought tears to her eyes and made her cry every evening after school for the next week.

She had never welcomed Friday with bigger relief. Not only because she hoped (maybe stupidly) that by Monday people would get bored of bullying her about Daryl, but also because the day before, Beth bumped into Rick while she was shopping with her mother and found herself on babysitting duty on Friday and Saturday as the married couple went away to celebrate their anniversary in some nicer place.

Beth was happy to hear that, as she knew they were going through some hard times with their marriage. She didn’t know the details, but a few times she helped them out by watching over the house or babysitting, she heard a lot of shouting and blaming on Lori’s part. She would never tell anyone, but she had also seen the way Rick’s partner, Shane, looked at Lori those few times at festivals and other events held by the town that they all attended. It didn’t stop at only looking, too; although Lori always kept her distance and glared at Shane when the man was being too obvious, Beth had a bad feeling that there was something more behind it. If there really was, then she felt really bad for Rick. Mr. Grimes was a good man. He deserved to be happy, and he so obviously wasn’t in this marriage. Still, every time they went somewhere just the two of them to celebrate something or just because, Beth held her fingers crossed for them.

Friday came, and Beth found herself rushing everywhere—first she slept in and had to rush to be on time at school, so she dressed up in a hurry, didn’t even wash her hair, which gave her school bullies some new ammunition (“Too busy giving blowjobs to your redneck asshole of a boyfriend to wash your hair, Greene?”). Then she got back home only to eat a quick dinner with the rest of the family and drive to her cheerleader training, which she was almost late to, also, because they were having practice an hour earlier on this day, and she totally forgot (“You have to sort your priorities, Betty. I’ve heard you’re acquainting yourself with the wrong people, and as a captain, I have to remind you: the cheerleading squad always comes first, if you know what I mean”). Since she was going to go straight to Grimes’ after the training, she drove her daddy’s truck by herself. Although she had no time to waste, she still ended up a bit disappointed when the truck didn’t break down on the way to school, nor on the way to Rick’s house. No reason to see Daryl again then, but maybe for the better since by the time she got to the right neighborhood, she was one big mess.

With hair sticking out of the messy bun she had made in the morning, a hole in her tights she had made on her run to practice, and the shirt worn on the other side because the practice took way too long and she was rushing to get herself in her clothes and out of school, she somehow managed to get herself to Grimes' on time. Just five minutes after she got to their place, Rick and Lori were out and Beth was left with little Judith and two fourteen-year-olds, Carl and his friend, Paul, who he was having over. 

Beth left the boys to watch TV in the living room and went upstairs to check on Judith, who had already eaten and was supposedly going to sleep through the whole night. After the check was done, Greene prepared some snacks and drinks for herself and the two boys and joined them on the couch. She did notice that they changed the movie to something Lori wouldn’t necessarily approve of because of the gore and violence, but since she knew that Rick let Carl watch it in secret, the blond girl decided not to point that out, especially with Carl’s friend present.

It was a TV show about a group of people trying to survive on an island together after their ship crashed into it, and apparently, the episode they were watching was focusing on the two most unlikely people that were thrown together—the ex-soldier with a bad temper and a twice-younger girl who wouldn’t survive if it weren’t for him. 

“Oh no, they’re gonna do it,” Carl’s friend whined, cringing visibly. Beth looked at the screen, realizing that she must have been spacing out again.

The two heroes were currently sitting in some cave, only lit by the fire the man had taught her how to make earlier. They were looking at each other, their eyes shining in the dim light of the fire.

“What? No, don’t be stupid, Paul. He’s twice her age. It’s gross!” Carl protested with disgust, and Beth blushed a little, although she couldn’t quite tell why. Or could she?

The lingering looks ended with the man breaking contact and saying that she should go to sleep. The girl, Claire, nodded, and although it would seem that nothing more was going to happen, instead of rolling over, she scooted closer to the man, kissed him on the cheek, and said, “Goodnight,” earning herself a heavy look. They were suddenly very close to each other, and it only took a second of tension before they began kissing. Carl and Paul started making gagging noises, covering their faces and whining as if it was the worst thing that could happen to them.

“Oh, come on. It’s not that bad,” Beth tried to reason with them. “See, the screen actually went dark now.”

“Good. Gore is one thing, but kissing? No way, that's gross,” Paul said, which Carl didn’t actually agree with, and both of them stopped paying any attention to the TV screen, too engrossed in their argument. That’s when Beth decided it would be a good time to go to bed. Not only for them but also for her. It had been a long day, and since she had come in here, she hadn’t even had time to make herself look any better. She still look like a mess and if there was one thing she was dreaming of at the moment it was a long shower. And after that she just wanted to go to sleep and to not think about that stupid lucky girl that got to kiss the older guy she was crushing on when Beth not only didn’t get to do that, but also didn’t even get to see Daryl Dixon for over a week. 

The biker, wherever he was, probably didn’t mind it entirely and had already forgotten about their few little meetings, but for some reason, Beth simply couldn’t. After a full week of teasing, taunting, and bullying, thinking about Daryl and the way their real acquaintance looked was the only thing bringing her comfort. She felt ashamed when people made crude jokes about Daryl and her, and she hated that they viewed him in such a bad way. Still, she would be lying if she didn’t take pride in the fact that she knew him in a way that none of her school mates ever would.

Still, she felt a little stupid for having such a strong crush on him, seeing as it was impossible for him to ever feel that way toward her. Beth knew she shouldn’t be thinking about him that way either. Because no matter how fun it was to talk to him or how bravely he saved her from those who threatened her, he was still a complicated thirty-something biker with a terrifying past and a very dangerous job (or so the gossip said, anyway). They either weren’t true, or the police didn’t have any proof, seeing as Dixon wasn’t charged with anything, unlike his older brother, Merle. Still, Beth had no idea what he was capable of. He might not be a bad man, but that didn’t mean he was the right man to fall for.

Once she got into the shower, Beth willed herself to relax under the hot water, even as her thoughts circled back to Daryl yet again. She was humming to herself, imagining his rugged face lit up by a fire, her sitting next to him, gazing into his blue eyes the way Claire did with that ex-soldier. Daryl leaned in, his breath ghosting over Beth's lips... 

Loud, aggressive knocking burst into her mind, shaking her out of her thoughts. Beth opened her eyes and stared at the wall in front of her for a long second, wondering if it was a product of her imagination or a real thing, when the knocking came again. This time, even louder.

Beth left the shower in a rush, not wanting Judith to wake up because of the noise. Her heart pounded loudly in her chest as she quickly grabbed a towel and tied it around herself while running downstairs. It was very late, and for a moment, she considered not answering it and calling the police. She knew, though, that it wouldn’t make the person stop knocking, and that would certainly lead to Judith waking up.

Beth got to the hall and spoke loud enough for the person on the other side to hear: “Alright, alright, I’m coming!”

Who the heck was visiting the Grimes at this hour? They must have been insane. It was hard to imagine Rick and Lori being fine with having guests past midnight.

After her words, a short silence followed. Beth finally reached the door, ready to look through the peephole when a muffled, surprised voice came from the other side:

“Beth?”

Her heart, honest to God, came to a halt for a few seconds. It’s not possible, Beth told herself, looking through the peephole. Sure enough, the biker she couldn’t stop thinking about for the last week was standing on the other side of the door. Even through the glass, Beth noticed the bad state Daryl was in. He was pale, his eyes dark-rimmed, and there was blood on his face and clothes.

“Daryl?”

Her own voice sounded hushed and so very unlike her; even she was taken aback by the sound of it. She forgot about the state of her hair, still not washed, and about the small towel, which was the only thing covering her body. The main thought in her mind in that single second before bursting the door open and making him come inside was to ensure he wasn’t hurt, or at least not hurt badly. Nothing else mattered.

With the door wide open, she stood before him in the towel, covering her upper body better than the see-through shirt, but not long enough to cover her legs and butt quite as well. And how bad would it be if someone saw them like that? Well, the potential onlookers probably wouldn’t think anything of it if it wasn’t for Beth instinctively stepping out of the house and into Dixon’s personal space.

“What happened?! Are you alright?!” she asked, almost shouting, but the man before her just watched her with wide, almost insane eyes. Beth had never thought she would see him that way. That dark, mad look in his eyes scared her even more than the blood. “Daryl?! Say something!”

Notes:

I'm so so sorry for the cliffhanger! Please don't hate me XD
I'll try to post the next chapter sooner this time :)

Chapter 7: Hey there lil’ ass kicker

Summary:

Beth finds herself alone with Daryl once more, and as their connection deepens, she grapples with her emerging feelings for him.

Notes:

As promised, the new chapter is here early! :)
I'm still going to post one on Sunday, though—don’t worry.
I might try to post two chapters a week in the future, too—I’m too excited to get this story out there! XD
But no promises yet; life’s kind of frantic lately.
Hope you’re all doing well! Have fun reading, and as always, I’m eager to hear what you think! <3

Beth frantically started checking the bloodstains on his shirt. Was there a wound? She had to know. Where was he injured?! Daryl’s bloody hands came into her sight, and on some impulse that even Beth didn’t understand, she caught them in hers, trying to find damage as well. Daryl all but ripped his fingers out of her grasp, but Beth grabbed him again. She almost didn’t hear him when he spoke, her heartbeat loud in her ears.

A raspy, quivery sound that tore itself out of his throat reminded her of a scared, wounded animal. It resonated within her, making her shiver.

“Damn, girl! ‘m fine! It ain’t even my blood, aright?!” Beth looked up to meet his shiny eyes, and even though she knew something very bad must have happened, she could finally breathe out a relieved, although still unsteady, breath.

“Who’s blood is it then?!” The man fell silent again, taking his eyes off hers and looking somewhere down between them. Beth repeated the question: “Daryl? Whose blood is it?!”

Two pairs of blue eyes met each other for the third time that night, and Daryl breathed out a shaky response: “All Merle’s fault. They came lookin’ for him. Shot this kid that worked behind the desk at our place. He was just there, Beth. Didn’t do nothing, and they just…”

Daryl looked away from her again, his voice coming to a halt with way too many emotions boiling inside him. The dread came over Beth.

“God. Is he…?” Her voice broke in the middle of the sentence, so she tried again. “Is he dead?”

Daryl shook his head. “Dunno.” That was his only response, and Beth had to take a calming breath to keep herself from pressing the subject. It was pretty darn cold too, and now that she knew Daryl wasn’t hurt, she started realizing that, in fact, she was standing outside with her hair wet and one small towel shielding her from the wind. Beth made sure the towel was still just as tightly wrapped around her body, but it didn’t ease the goosebumps or make the shivers stop.

“Come on,” Beth murmured finally, her voice taking on a soft note. “Let’s get you clean.”

Daryl startled at the suggestion. “Are you alone here? Where…?”

“Rick’s out with Lori. I’m watching over the kids, but it’s okay; they’re all asleep,” Beth told him, moving to take his hand in hers again.

“You’ll get blood on yerself.” Daryl protested, but it sounded weak. The way he clung onto her hand a little too firmly, a little too desperately, indicated that Daryl didn’t really want her to let go. Perhaps at this moment, as Beth led him inside, and even though he would probably never admit it, her touch was the only thing keeping him grounded.

Beth didn’t answer him, instead squeezing his fingers in hers and smiling at him reassuringly for a short moment before letting go to close the doors behind them. Then she looked the man over, trying to come up with an exact plan of what to do next. First, she should probably get him to wash the blood out of his arms and face, and then out of his clothes. He couldn’t parade in here only in his underwear though. But the thought of his almost naked body, and the fact that she was almost naked too, caused warmth to spread through her body.

“There’s a second bathroom in the basement.” Beth took his hand again and the man didn’t protest this time. She led him to the basement doors. “You can take a shower there and I’ll find a change of clothes for you, alright?”

“Mhmm.” He was avoiding eye contact again and she could tell he was biting his cheek from the inside. The sign of nervousness. She gave his hand another gentle squeeze.

“Daryl?” When the silence stretched after she spoke his name, Daryl finally lifted his gaze and met hers. Beth gave him a soft, sorrowful smile. “You know it wasn’t your fault, right?”

He gave a slight shake of his head and withdrew his hand from hers.

“I should go. Shouldn’t have come here. Shouldn’t talk to you about this. I…”

“No.” Beth gently grasped his arms, holding them firmly to stop his restless movements. “You shouldn’t go anywhere in this state, Daryl. It’s better if you stay here. Look, there’s no one in here except for me, two sleeping teenagers and a one-year-old.” She was burning under his attentive gaze. Daryl’s eyes didn’t stray from her face, but their closeness, the way he was scrutinizing her with his dark, haunted blues, was almost unbearable. Focus, Beth. This is important. “Rick and Lori will come back tomorrow in the evening. You can go home early in the morning and nobody will ever know that you’ve been here. I promise. There’s a guest room in the basement. You can sleep in there, and we don’t even have to talk about what happened. You can just go straight to bed and be gone before I wake up tomorrow. Would that be okay?”

She knew she was talking his ears off, but she had to make him stay. A knot of fear twisted in Beth's stomach, an unsettling certainty that something terrible would happen if she let Daryl go in the state he was in. Her heart raced as the thought of him wandering out there like this sent a wave of dread through her. She couldn't risk it. She wouldn't let him go like that.

Daryl studied her for a long moment, his blue eyes as dark and intense as the night sky, the dried blood on his cheek standing out even more vividly in the room's dim light. That look sent a ripple of heat across her skin. Try as she might, Beth couldn't decipher his expression—it was like he was holding everything just out of reach. Daryl was a mystery to her, a tangled web of emotions she couldn’t untangle, and it unsettled her in ways that weren’t entirely frightening.

There was something else, a strange flutter low in her stomach that made her breath catch and her heart race. With a jolt, she realized how close they were standing to one another. Beth could almost feel his body radiating with heat, and the thought that the only thing shielding her naked body from his eyes was a small towel made her shiver again, this time not with coldness.

“Yeah, alright.”

Daryl shifted slightly, this unintentional movement bringing them even closer. Beth swallowed audibly, her eyes dropping down to his lips to watch as he dragged his tongue across them, leaving them glistening. When she looked up again it was to see his eyes leave her face and drift down her body in the slowest, most torturous manner she could imagine. The air felt so dense all of a sudden that Beth could barely draw a breath, and that funny flutter she felt in her lower tummy sank downward. Beth squeezed her legs together and bit her lower lip. Was he thinking about the same thing as her? And how bad of a person she was for liking the idea of this rough, much older and probably dangerous biker thinking about her that way? Of him wanting her the same way Jimmy wanted her?

“You’re drippin’ wet again, girl. You gonna make a habit of it or something?” Daryl said lowly, his husky voice even more raspy than usual.

“Depends.” She whispered not knowing what was speaking through her at this moment. It sure as hell wasn’t a good, religious farm girl that her father raised her to be.

Daryl’s eyes snapped back to hers and she wasn’t brave enough to claim that she knew exactly what emotions painted the man’s face in that moment. What she knew though was how that look in Daryl’s eyes made her feel.

“On what?”

On whether you’re gonna be around to look at me, she thought, trying and failing to calm her breathing. Beth wasn’t brave or crazy enough to voice that thought though so instead she shifted slightly creating more space between them and trying to come out with something to say. Anything but what she actually wanted to. It was as if Daryl could actually sense her sudden discomfort though. Before she even decided to open her mouth the man cleared his throat and uttered: 

“Weren’t you supposed to get me some nice clean clothes, Greene?”

It took her a moment to process the words, her gaze lingering on his deep blue eyes as if she were a lovestruck fool. A rush of embarrassment washed over her for fantasizing about him in a moment like this. With a sheepish nod, Beth turned to the stairs. 

Maybe it was all her imagination. Maybe she wanted him to want her so much that she started seeing something that wasn’t there? God, Daryl probably thought she was an idiot.

Without another word she ventured up the stairs. The second she heard him closing the door to the basement though the blond girl came to a stop and rested her head on the cold railing trying yet again to calm herself down. Why was she always saying and thinking those weird things when she was too close to him? Why did her body and mind betray her like that? Why would she even want him? He was all covered in someone’s blood. It was disgusting. It should disgust her enough to not want to have anything to do with him. Unfortunately, it didn’t.

Beth had to take a few more reassuring breaths to be able to start thinking rationally. It was then that she realized that she’ll have to go through Rick’s stuff. It didn’t please her at all, but what choice did she have? Beth couldn’t let Daryl sleep in those bloody clothes. She intended to wash the blood of them so that he could wear them in the morning, then Beth would wash Rick’s clothes, dry them and fold them neatly in the drawer just the way they were. Nobody will have to know about this. It will make looking the man in the eye a bit hard in the evening, but she will manage. It’s not that she’s going to go through his drawers without a good reason. It’s all for a greater good, right? Right. She’ll tell herself that.

Beth found a simple white T-shirt and some black pajama bottoms for Daryl before heading to the spare bedroom where she kept her clothes. After changing into her own pajamas—embarrassingly childish ones, no less (like seriously, Beth, Mickey Mouse? Even if Daryl felt any sort of desire toward her, she was sure that would vanish the moment he saw her in this)—she hesitated for a moment but ultimately decided it would be weird to change back into her clothes now that he knew she had showered and was going to bed.

She checked briefly on Judith, Carl, and his friend; both kids were still asleep in their rooms, which was impressive considering how loud Daryl’s knocking had been. Even if Carl or Paul had woken up, they apparently decided it was too much hassle to get up and see who it was. Beth was surprised but grateful that they hadn’t ventured downstairs.

She went downstairs herself, ensuring she had closed the doors behind her after entering the house with Daryl, then made her way to the basement. She knocked lightly on the bathroom door and was startled when it opened slightly, just enough for Daryl to fit a hand between the doors and the frame. Beth handed him the clothes and jumped a little when the door closed just as quickly as it had opened.

“You’re very welcome,” Beth commented, rolling her eyes. She took a seat on the bed, waiting for him to come out, just in case he felt like pouring his heart out. It was highly unlikely, but Beth wouldn’t be herself if she didn’t have hope.

Just as she thought seeing her after coming out of the shower in Rick’s clothes didn’t put a smile on Daryl’s face. In fact, it did the actual opposite.

“I thought you said you’re not gonna play Dr. Phil with me,”  he remarked grumpily, avoiding her gaze at all costs. It sounded like he truly hated seeing her there, even though it was her helping him this time. The teenager had never felt so grateful to have an excuse in her life.

“I won’t. Just wanted to take care of your clothes, wash and dry them so that you can wear them in the morning.”

The biker side eyed her and the girl took it as an opportunity to send him a smile.

“Don’t need no damn help in washin’ my clothes, girl.”

Beth sighed. Daryl Dixon was, honest to God, the most infuriatingly difficult person she had ever met.

“It’s not like you have a choice here, Daryl.” Beth said flatly, earning herself an angry look that she completely ignored. “I can’t let you wander around the house. Not when Carl and his friend could come downstairs any moment and…”

“‘s not like I asked you to let me stay here. Just wanted to talk to Rick, ‘s all.” By this point, Daryl was pacing the room, chewing on his thumb, buzzing with anger. At what? Beth couldn’t tell.

“You were shaking, Daryl. You shouldn’t be driving in a state like this.”

“So what?! ‘s not like you’d be driving with me, so what do you care? Huh?”

Beth’s eyes widened, but she didn’t let him provoke her. Instead, she responded firmly, “I just do, Daryl.” She got up and managed to stop his pacing with one hard look, not giving him the opportunity to launch into yet another argument. “I can’t see what’s wrong with me not wanting you to die in a motorcycle crash or with you staying here for the night. It’s not a crime to help another person out, so why don’t you just stop getting so worked up about it, hm?”

With that, she disappeared into the bathroom to retrieve his clothes. Although she had planned to head straight for the stairs and leave him alone for the night, once she reentered the bedroom and saw him sitting on the bed with his head hidden in his arms, she stopped dead in her tracks.

Beth ended up chewing on her lower lip for a long moment, scared to even breathe. She didn’t know what to do anymore. It didn’t seem like Daryl appreciated her company or her desire to help him, so it would probably be best to leave, but her feet felt glued to the floor.

“Daryl…”  she whispered at last, and he shook his head in response.

“Don’t,”

Beth sighted. Fine. Reluctantly, she started to move toward the stairs.

“ ‘s all my fault,” Daryl uttered so silently Beth almost missed it. She came to an abrupt stop and turned to face him again. He was still sitting with his head buried in his hands, shaking slightly. “Shoulda known that deal with The Saviors was gonna screw us over in the end. Even Rick knew somethin’ was boiling.”

“Daryl, whatever happened, you couldn’t possibly know…” Beth began, but he wasn’t listening.

“And Zach?” Now the biker raised his head, and when their eyes met, Beth almost groaned with pain—the hurt, haunted look in his eyes was suffocating. “He isn’t even part of the Feral Angels. Came to me, needed money, so I hired him. Made him pick up the damned calls and manage the paperwork. I just wanted to help him and what did I get him? A bullet in the stomach. That’s on me. I fucking killed him, Beth “

Daryl’s voice broke with emotion, and a single, strained sound escaped his throat despite his efforts. In a matter of seconds, Beth was kneeling in front of him, squeezing his dirty clothes in one hand and his hand with the other.

“Before, you said you didn’t know if he was dead, right?”

Daryl nodded.

“I couldn’t go inside. Even if I got away, they would come knocking; they’d recognize me on the cameras. So I got some medics to take him and drove away, leaving him all alone in that hospital, bleeding out.” Daryl groaned again, closing his eyes and grimacing. “I’m a fucking… Rick shoulda put me behind bars when he had the chance.”

Beth swallowed audibly, trying to hold back her tears. Until now, she had never realized how harsh, unforgivable, and miserable Daryl Dixon’s reality was, nor how much he hated himself for who he was. Up to this point, she had been fascinated by his contradictions, by how many faces he wore, and by how sensitive and good he could be behind that rough, dangerous exterior. But in this moment, Beth Greene saw it for what it truly was, and no, it wasn’t fascinating at all—it was outright tragic.

For a long moment, there was no sound except for their breathing, her heart racing, and his silent sobs that he would probably never admit to. Then there was the sound of her slow movements. She sat next to him on the bed, the pile of his clothes forgotten on the floor. It took all of her courage, but before Daryl could question her, she pressed herself to his side, wrapping one arm around his back, resting her cheek against his shoulder, and pulling his hand into hers. Beth laced their fingers together, closing her eyes and hoping to God that he wouldn’t push her away and get angry again. She could almost see it happening behind her closed lids.

Daryl tensed, and Beth opened her eyes just as he raised his head to look at her from the close proximity she had put them in. She tensed as well, waiting for his reaction, which took far too long to come. Daryl took his time averting his gaze from hers to look down at their laced fingers, uncertainty and perhaps a little wonder flickering across his face. It wasn’t until Beth felt him squeeze her hand back instead of unlacing their fingers that she smiled sweetly. She let her eyes fall closed again. A moment later, Daryl sighed and rested his cheek on the top of her head, making Beth feel as if she had just won a big prize. It had never felt this good to be close to Jimmy.

“Is that why you came here tonight? To make Rick arrest you?” Beth asked softly after a while. Daryl hummed in response.

“Mhmm.”

“You shouldn’t do this. You’re a good man, Daryl. You don’t belong behind bars,” the girl whispered, pressing herself even more tightly against him.

“Stop.” Daryl’s husky voice pleaded with her, but Beth refused to back down.

“You don’t, Daryl. You made a mistake. Maybe more than one, but that doesn’t mean you’re a bad person.”

“You don’t know what you’re talking about,” the biker mumbled, and Beth smiled a little. She was just about to tell him how wrong he was when the small device on the nightstand came to life, filling the room with the sound of a crying baby.

“Darn. It’s Judy. I’ll be right back.”

Beth untangled herself from Daryl, grabbed his clothes from the floor, and fled the room on a mission to put the clothes in the washing machine and rescue Judith from whatever was causing her distress. Usually, it didn’t take her long to calm Judy down and put her back to sleep. This time, however, when she wanted so desperately to return to Daryl, the child wasn’t responding to her silent pleas at all. Even her humming and singing failed to soothe the little girl, and Beth wasn’t surprised when, after about fifteen minutes, the door to Judy’s room opened.

“I’m so sorry, Carl. She’s…” Beth said, turning to look at the boy. “Oh…”

Daryl wouldn’t meet her eyes, probably unsure if his presence was welcome or not. After all, Beth had told him she didn’t want him wandering around. And yet, here he was upstairs, looking extremely uncomfortable and out of place.

He cleared his throat before asking, “Can I?” Beth furrowed her brows in confusion, and her silence prompted Daryl to look up. He made a vague gesture toward her. “The baby… I can help.”

Beth nodded, smiling kindly. She didn’t believe passing the little girl to the biker would help in any way—not only because he was a stranger to her, but also because Judy loved it when Beth sang to her, and even that hadn’t calmed her down. Still, Beth couldn’t say no.

“Yeah, sure. Here you go.” She stepped closer, passing the crying baby to him, not entirely unfazed by the smile that appeared on the biker’s lips as he looked down at the little girl in his arms. “Don’t expect too much. She’s really grumpy tonight.”

“Hey there, lil’ ass kicker,” Daryl said in his husky voice, and it was as if he cast a spell on Judith because she immediately stopped crying, a sweet smile spreading across her cute little face. Beth couldn’t believe it. It was like Judy transformed into a completely different kid once she was in Daryl’s arms. No amount of singing had ever soothed her as quickly as Daryl’s voice. “What’s the matter, huh? Why are you giving Aunt Beth such a hard time, kiddo? Don’t like her singing to ya? I know she’s no jukebox, but it’s nice enough, isn’t it?”

Beth blushed a little. How did he know? He hadn’t heard her singing, had he? The blonde girl remembered the small device that was placed in almost every room except for the bathroom and Carl’s room. Thanks to that radio, they could hear Judy crying, but Daryl could also hear her singing when she went up to soothe her. Oh Lord…

“I don’t get it. She doesn’t like strangers…”

Daryl looked up at her for a second before refocusing on Judy. Beth could swear she had never seen anything sweeter than those two.

“I ain’t a stranger. I was there in the hospital when lil’ ass kicker was born.” Beth could barely contain her surprise. She had only heard that Rick wasn’t there because he was working—Lori liked to point out how he was neglecting their relationship and putting his job first. The girl would’ve never thought Daryl knew Lori in any capacity other than as the sheriff's wife. “Lori’s car crashed in the middle of nowhere when she was driving back from her parents’ place. She called me to come and get her and the car to our shop. When I got there, she was already in labor. Rick’s phone was dead and was somewhere on the case, so I took her to the nearest hospital. I had never seen her freaking out so badly. She wouldn’t let me leave. Told the doctors I was her brother and that I was going to stay with her.”

Daryl fell silent, but Beth wanted to hear more. The man had piqued her curiosity.

“So you and Lori are friends?”

Daryl snorted. “Nah, she hates my guts. Thinks Rick’s grown soft on me and that he’s gonna get in trouble because of it.”

Well, that didn’t sound weird at all.

“Wait. But wasn’t that at the beginning of your stay here? Right after you and your brother moved in?”

“Yeah, it was, but I knew Grimes’ way before that. I first met Rick when he was getting hitched to Lori. Didn’t even know he was a cop back then.”

There had to be a longer story behind that, Beth thought, but she didn’t start questioning him. Perhaps another day he’d share that one too.

“Why did she want you to stay if she hates you?”

Daryl rolled his shoulders. “Hell if I know.” Judith, who was on the verge of falling asleep, startled when Daryl spoke a little louder, so the next part came out almost as a whisper. “I guess she was scared because it was too soon. She had her date set for one month later. Maybe it felt safer to have someone she was familiar with there with her.”

Judy let his voice soothe her again, and Beth smiled. Feeling like she really needed to sit down for a moment, the teenager went to the sofa that Lori had placed in the room for nights like this. Daryl approached it too but stayed on his feet for the time being.

“Okay. But that doesn’t explain why Judy likes you so much,” Beth teased, smiling sweetly and immediately noticing the small blush creeping up his cheeks.

“She likes my voice, that’s all. I’ve held her a few times, so I guess she’s used to me by now.”

“Mhm. That’s good. You holding her is the most adorable thing I’ve seen in a long time.”

“Shut up.”

Now he was definitely blushing, and hell, if Beth wasn’t in love with that sight—Daryl Dixon holding a small girl in his strong, well-built arms and blushing because someone thought it looked sweet.

“But it is. You look very cute.”

“Stop.”

The man was clearly embarrassed, but Beth couldn’t just let it slide.

“I’d definitely take a picture of you two, but I left my phone downstairs.”

“And thank God for that,” the man murmured grumpily, avoiding her gaze. He returned to Judith’s cradle and slowly began putting the girl down, trying and failing not to wake her. The moment the baby realized the biker was leaving, she started crying again. It took Daryl just uttering, “Alright, alright, lil’ ass kicker. I get it, no putting down,” and taking her back into his arms for the girl to calm down again. Beth was amazed, to say the least.

Not having any other choice, Daryl returned to the sofa and took a spot next to Beth.

“I guess I’m on babysitting duty today.”

“You asked for it,” the blonde girl reminded him, smiling teasingly.

“Yeah. You can go to sleep if you want. I’ll stay with her.”

“Oh no, Mr. Dixon. That wouldn’t be fair since I’m the one getting paid for it. Unless you want me to share the money with you…”

“Nah, keep your money, girl.”

They fell silent after that, both a bit too exhausted to keep talking and both enjoying the quiet after twenty minutes of Judith’s crying. If Beth were to be honest, she was enjoying their closeness the most. Even though the sofa was big and they both had plenty of space on their sides, Daryl sat so close to her that their thighs and shoulders were touching. The man probably didn’t think anything of it, didn’t even notice, but that couldn’t be said for Beth. All she could think about was how it was driving her insane, yet at the same time, she would do anything to keep him pressed against her like this. And again, she had no idea where that feeling came from or why.

The only thing she knew for certain was that it was dangerous to feel that way toward him. In all honesty, Beth had been aware of this since the first night she spent with him, but only now did she realize how utterly screwed she was if she let those feelings grow. The only outcome could be her misery. That man could never be hers in any way—she was sure of it.

Daryl Dixon was unattainable. Not only because he was so much older than her or because she was just a schoolgirl and he was a rough biker with a criminal background who would never see her as anything but a little girl, but also because it would destroy him. They were both dangerous to each other. If someone were to notice their acquaintance, they would think the worst about this sweet, sensitive, and kind man. They would accuse him of corrupting her, of sexual abuse, and that would kill him long before Beth’s brother would think of it, long before her father would reach for a shotgun. Beth would hate to see him hurt because of her, and she knew it would happen eventually, because nothing ever stays secret in small communities like theirs. Still, she couldn’t help but savor the feelings he was evoking in her. She’s never experienced anything like this and while she knew it was wrong, Beth thought she’d love to explore this further. What else could Daryl Dixon make her feel?

Lost in her thoughts, Beth didn't notice as she began to drift off. She found herself with her nose pressed against Daryl's neck, her knees resting on his legs, and her right hand resting on his chest—all of it completely unintentional.

Chapter 8: She hasn’t done anything wrong

Summary:

Rick finds something unexpected at home and Beth navigates the emotional turmoil of her evolving feelings for Daryl while juggling the pressures of adolescence, friendships, and the anticipation of her upcoming graduation.

Notes:

Alrriiiighttt, chapter 8 is here! :)
Just a heads up: I did some research on US educational systems, but I'm not sure I got everything right about the dates and so on - hopefully I did, but if I didn't, I'm very sorry. I tried my best.

Rick Grimes had seen a lot of weird, scary, disturbing, and even downright awful things in his life. He had witnessed bloody and sickening murder scenes, victims of all kinds of abuse, a teenage girl who took her own life with her mother’s pills and alcohol, a drug dealer who’d been shot through the head, and Sophia’s body lying in a bed of roses in the nearby woods.

He had experienced a great deal of violence, a lot of anger. He had even seen hatred in his wife’s eyes when he told her that he had to go to yet another crime scene, another intervention, to save another case or just be the sheriff. He had seen a great deal of pain, cruelty, and fear. To say that he sometimes didn’t even believe in the existence of good people was an understatement, because there were times when Rick doubted that even he himself was "good people."

Then the man would look at Carl. His sweet little boy, who was so creative, wise, and curious about the world, growing up fast to become a good man. He would look at Judith. And he would realize that, in fact, there were still plenty of wonderful things in the world worth fighting for.

However, at the age of thirty-one, and after all the things—whether good or bad—that he had seen or experienced, Rick was not prepared to come back home at six in the morning to find Daryl Dixon asleep with one arm around his daughter and the other around little Beth Greene, who was more or less sleeping on Daryl’s chest. After a late-night fight with Lori, driving her to her parents' house, and attending an intervention, Rick was so exhausted he had to pinch himself to make sure what he was seeing was real. No amount of blinking or pinching helped change the scene, though, and Rick found himself utterly confused.

It wasn’t that the sheriff hadn’t entertained the thought of Beth bringing her boyfriend over to help; he wasn’t even opposed to it. He had even suggested to Lori that perhaps Beth would like to bring someone sometime, but the teenager had never expressed any desire to do so. So no, he wouldn’t have been surprised if Beth had called someone to come over and assist her. What he did not expect was to find her snuggling Daryl-freaking-Dixon on his own sofa bed.

Once the initial shock wore off after a minute or two of watching them, Rick, still rather perplexed and probably not as angry as he should have been (but can you really blame him after the exhausting night he’d had?), came to the realization that what disturbed him the most about the picture was the fact that Daryl-do-not-touch-me-unless-you-wanna-die-Dixon had willingly put himself there, on that couch, and let Beth Greene cuddle him.

The other thing that hit Rick was that he had never actually seen Daryl so relaxed and comfortable with anyone’s proximity. He’d twitch and tense up even when Carol, who had been his friend for over a year, was the one hugging or touching him. Hell, the biker would jump a little every time Rick patted him on the shoulder, and they had known each other for years. How long had Daryl known Beth? Rick wasn’t even aware that Beth had ever spoken to any member of the Feral Angels. It seemed so surreal for this little innocent farm girl to do so that Rick began to wonder if he wasn’t hallucinating. Why on Earth would Daryl be here anyway?

Rick cleared his throat loud enough for Daryl to wake up with a slight start. It took Daryl approximately half a second to find the source of the sound. Two pairs of blue eyes met: one confused, questioning; the other suddenly wide, apprehensive, and a little bit ashamed.

Beth didn’t wake up at the sound. Instead, she snuggled herself closer, her legs sliding onto Daryl’s, her nose pressing into the crook of his neck, and her hand finding bare skin on his chest and stroking the few hairs peeking out from his shirt, making the man blush crimson. Now the biker was definitely not comfortable, and Rick would have laughed—he really would have—if it weren’t for the fact that it was little Beth Greene pressing herself against him. No matter how cute they looked, it wasn’t right.

“I think you’ve got a bit of a situation here, Daryl.” Rick couldn’t help but tease. The man shot him a look that said, One more word, Grimes. Just one more. But Rick ignored it. “Care to tell me what the hell you’re doing in my house at six in the morning, Dixon?”

“Care to help me out, Grimes?”

Rick moved to the sofa to assist Daryl by removing at least one of the bodies that were restraining him. The sheriff gently picked Judith up and made his way to her bed.

“Beth.” Rick heard a quiet, gruff voice behind him, but the only response Daryl got was a groan of disapproval. Next, there was a soft rustle—probably Beth snuggling even more into the poor man. “You gotta wake up, girl.”

“Mhmm?”

Rick laid his sleeping baby in her cradle and turned around to see Daryl trying, and failing, to escape Beth’s hold.

“Wake up. Rick’s here.”

“Whaaa...?” Beth raised her head from Daryl’s shoulder and looked at the man she was now almost entirely lying on. Rick, who had years of training in reading body language, immediately noticed how unconcerned she seemed about their closeness, even when Daryl turned his head to look down at her. If it had been anyone else, Rick would have been throwing punches by now. But Daryl? He knew Daryl, and whatever this was, it couldn’t be what it looked like. It just couldn’t.

“All right, that’s enough.” Rick’s voice was surprisingly firm, and it had the desired effect. Beth averted her gaze from Daryl’s lips—or eyes, or whatever she had been looking at in that moment (Rick really didn’t want to know)—and her startled, wide eyes found Rick’s.

“Mr. Grimes, I swear, it’s not...” Beth got to her feet, blushing heavily, clearly ready to plead her case, but Rick didn’t let her finish. He raised his hand to stop her.

“No, Beth. Not before I get my coffee. I can’t deal with this without caffeine or alcohol in my veins, and since it’s too early for the latter, I’m gonna go downstairs and make some coffee. And when you both get there, God help you if you don’t give me a good enough explanation for... for this.”

Rick made a vague gesture in their direction and, without another word, left the room.

 *

Daryl stormed off after Mr. Grimes without as much as a glance in her direction and suddenly Beth was tripping in guilt. It was all her fault. She fell asleep thinking that she couldn’t get Daryl in trouble by hanging around him that night and the next morning she did just that. 

Beth went to the bedroom she was supposed to sleep in last night and snatched her white cardigan. Usually she wouldn’t parade in her pj’s in Rick’s house but just this time she had more important things to worry about than her outfit. She went downstairs listening closely in case they already started talking about what transpired. 

“’s not… I didn’t do anything to her if that’s what you’re worried about.” Daryl’s voice was gruff and silent, full of guilt and shame, and Beth felt her heart shattering. She didn’t want him to feel that way. 

Why did she have to snuggle him in her sleep? Why would her body betray her this way? Or better yet, what if there was no Rick in the morning? Because for a second there, before she realized that someone else was in the room and that this someone was Rick Grimes, she could feel Daryl’s breath ghosting over her lips and that funny feeling down her tummy came back stronger than ever making her feel like she couldn’t take it anymore. Like she had to do something, like she needed to kiss those lips of his or she’d suffocate. And that look on his face? He’s never looked at her quite like this before. For a moment she thought that perhaps Daryl felt the same. That perhaps he wanted to kiss her too. And then she heard Rick and the spell was broken.

“Daryl, if you think I’m worried about that then you lost your damn mind.” Rick’s voice was firm and although she could hear that the man was at least disturbed, not to say angry, it didn’t sound like he was seconds away from dimming Daryl a sexual predator. “But if you’re gonna keep standing here tellin’ me you don’t even know her, I swear to God I’ll punch you in the face.” Daryl snorted but there was no amusement in this sound. Rick simply ignored him. “So, how do you know each other?”

“’s long story.”

“I don’t care. You’re gonna tell me everything I wanna know and in return I’ll consider not telling Hershel Greene about your little acquaintance. That’s how it works, Daryl.”

 “You’ll consider.” Daryl spitted out and Beth could tell he was getting angry now.

“Can you blame me? I saw you fucking snuggling on my sofa and let me tell you, you looked awfully cozy!”

Beth blushed but her embarrassment quickly turned into hurt when Daryl’s response came just a few seconds later.

“What are you talking about, Grimes?! She’s fucking seventeen! Who are you takin’ me for?!”

“Daryl…”

“Look, I’m not a saint but I ain’t screwing little girls!”

The silence fell over the house and Beth wondered if that was the right moment to come in when Rick sighed and said way more silently.

“I’ve never said you were. I just asked you what you were doing here with Beth Greene.”

“Same damn thing. You actin’ like I’m one of ‘em suspects of yours when you know damn well she ain’t the kinda girl I’d ever go for, even if she was older. She was just here when I came to see ya, nothing else to it, ‘right?”

A sorrowful feeling pierced through her heart at his words. Not even if she was older? That one hurt something fierce. So, all those looks he was giving her were just her imagination then? 

Daryl’s voice was breaking from all of the emotions and Beth hated it too. Hated that she was so damn young. That she made him feel like he’s done something wrong, like he was a bad person. Hated that she let this attraction towards Daryl affect him so much. Hated that she let it show so much that the other person, the person that has never seen them even talking to each other could tell straight away that something was not right. That there was something more than friendly feelings to it. At least on her part seeing as Daryl just went and said he would never let it happen. That he doesn’t feel it that way. And perhaps that’s for the better. Perhaps now she’ll be able to let it go. To stop thinking about him in this way. That’s for the better too. Right?

Right. Then why does it hurt so much?

“Alright, Daryl. Let’s say I’m gonna trust you on this, but...”

“Good.”

That’s when Beth decided to enter the kitchen. She couldn’t listen anymore. Her heart, Beth thought, might break if Daryl continued to reveal to Rick just how unattractive she was to him. It was best to put a stop to it.

She took a deep breath, closed her eyes for a moment, exhaled, and entered, trying to look composed and like she hadn’t just eavesdropped on them for a few minutes. Like she hadn’t just heard the man she was crushing on saying he would never be interested in her.
Beth allowed herself to glance at Daryl for only a split second. Although Mr. Grimes was sitting down, sipping his coffee, Daryl was standing, distancing himself from Rick and now from her as well. He must have sensed her gaze because the next thing Beth knew, they were making eye contact again.

Suddenly, all the feelings Beth had moments ago, when she woke up in his arms and almost kissed him, rushed back, making her heart race. For another moment, they seemed compelled to keep looking at each other. Only when Rick cleared his throat did Daryl quickly look away and focus on the floor instead. Beth blushed, feeling as if she had done something wrong again, and averted her eyes too.

Just as she thought, the sheriff was watching them both intently, making her feel even more uncomfortable in her own skin.

“Would you like some coffee?”

“Yes, thank you, Mr. Grimes. I just…” she began, but he interrupted her again.

“I’ve told you many times, Beth. It’s Rick.”

Beth nodded, sat down on the other side of the table, took a sip of the coffee Mr. Grimes poured for her, and then began again.

“Rick. I know you’re probably wondering why Daryl spent the night here...”

“Yeah, I hope you’re going to fill me in, Beth, because Daryl here was awfully unhelpful on that matter.”

Daryl snorted, but the sheriff ignored him. Instead, Rick focused on her. He offered a smile, and she could tell that most of his anger had already faded. Now he just seemed confused and tired.

“Well. Daryl came here looking for you, but you were gone. He was very anxious, and I thought he wasn’t in any state to drive home. That’s why I let him stay in the basement.”

“But he didn’t stay in the basement.”

“No. Judy started crying, and I went to calm her down, but nothing worked. Not until she heard Daryl’s voice. He came in to help, held her, and talked to her for a while. I guess we just fell asleep while putting her back to sleep.” Beth shrugged, trying to make it seem like a trivial matter. To make it seem like she thought nothing of it, so Rick wouldn’t either.

But it wasn’t that simple. For her, it wasn’t nothing that she had slept with Daryl Dixon on that sofa. It wasn’t nothing that she had snuggled him in her sleep. It wasn’t nothing that she had wanted to kiss him so badly in the morning that she was sure she would have done it if Rick hadn’t been there with them. And it wasn’t nothing that Beth had to forget about it. She had to make it into something small. Into something meaningless. But how could she do that when every nerve in her body was screaming that the distance between them was now unbearable? When her heart was splitting in two at the thought of not feeling that way again?

And yes, perhaps she was overreacting, and the world wasn’t ending. She would probably feel this way about many other boys in her life, or at least that’s what Maggie would say if she could hear her thoughts now. Maybe it was childish of her. Maybe she was just a silly teenage girl with a crush on a much older, dangerous man. But telling herself that over and over again didn’t change how she felt. It didn’t make her feel any better about letting this ‘silly crush’ go.

“Thank you, Beth. If you could just explain why you let a stranger into the house when you were alone, that would…”

Cheap trick. Beth almost rolled her eyes. If that was how he talked to his suspects, it was a good thing the city had such low crime rates, or they’d be in trouble. No disrespect to Rick, of course.

“I believe you know by now that Daryl isn’t a stranger to me.”

“How do you two know each other then?”

“My foot got caught in a snare in the woods. Daryl found me and freed it. That’s how we met, but… uhm, he helps my dad on the farm sometimes too, and we’ve run into each other a few times since then.”

“You’ve run into each other?” Rick looked skeptical. He shifted his gaze from her back to Daryl, who had fallen suspiciously silent after she entered the room.

“It’s a small town, Rick. Do you really want to hear about every damn time we saw each other on the street?” Daryl snapped, suddenly frustrated with his friend, and Rick grimaced in return.

“No, Daryl. I just want to know about each time you two interacted.”

“For what?”

Beth used the break in the interrogation to take a few sips of her coffee, which was a mistake.

“I’ve already told you. It’s so I can decide whether I should notify Hershel or not.”

Beth choked on her coffee and had to cough a few times. Before she could respond, Daryl had already covered for her.

“Notify him about what, exactly? Nothing happened.” He hissed the last two words slowly, as if Rick wouldn’t understand if he said them any faster.

“Well, if I were him, I’d want to know who my teenage daughter was spending time with.”

“Yeah, like I don’t have better things to do than hang out with schoolgirls. You’ve lost your damn mind, Rick.”

Beth pressed her lips into a thin line at the careless words. Once again, she was confronted with the harsh truth of their relationship. Stupid little girl. Thinking he actually enjoyed your company. Thinking he liked you. That he saw anything but a teenager in you.

“Maybe I have.”

“Yeah. That’s why I’m not going to listen to it anymore.”

“Where do you think you’re going?” Now Rick stood up too, but Beth didn’t turn to look at Daryl as he left the room. She knew that if she did, her heart would shatter entirely.

“To change my damn clothes. Then I’m going home.”

Rick followed Daryl out of the kitchen, and Beth heard their argument grow more distant with each step.

“I think we have other things to discuss. Like what happened yesterday.”

“It’ll have to wait. I’m not in the mood now.”

“You’re not in the mood? What the hell am I supposed to say, huh? While you were snuggling teenage girls on my couch, I was cleaning up your mess!”

“You know damn well it isn’t my mess! Now get out of my face, Grimes. And stop grilling this poor girl. She hasn’t done anything wrong!”

Beth sighed heavily. This was not how she imagined their next meeting would go. Things had spiraled out of control way too fast, and if she had ever considered befriending Daryl and keeping their relationship a secret, she now knew how foolish that idea had been. It could never happen. Not in a small town like theirs. And not with her crushing on him. She was pretty damn sure Daryl had realized she had this silly crush on him by now. She was also sure that the things the biker had said today weren’t just to get Rick off their backs. It was probably also to let her know how he saw things. To let her know she was just a foolish schoolgirl and that spending time with her was, in fact, tedious.

Beth had to hold back tears as she listened to Daryl start his vehicle outside and drive away. Rick didn’t interrogate her any further. He apologized if he had made her uncomfortable, saying he was just worried. Then he told her she could go home because he was staying in, and he gave her money for babysitting. It was too much, considering she had only taken care of the kids through the night, but he wouldn’t listen to her protests. So Beth went home, took Nelly for a ride, and broke down crying once she was far enough away that her family wouldn’t see. She decided then that she was going to forget about Daryl Dixon.

April passed in a blur of waiting for responses from her college applications. Beth was accepted to three of the four schools she had applied to. She got into Emory University, the same university Maggie had attended and one of the two her parents most wanted her to attend. That way, she’d be close and with Maggie—a win-win situation. She also got into Georgetown, which she applied to with Amy. She didn’t get into Georgia Institute of Technology, also located in Atlanta, but she did receive an acceptance letter from the University of Virginia.

She had to make a decision by the end of April, and she did.

May came and went, and if Beth saw Daryl during this time, she pretended she didn’t, so it was just like before he’d ever entered her life. Or that’s what she told herself. Her eighteenth birthday crept up on her out of nowhere. On the twenty-eighth of May, when she blew the candles on the cake at her garden party, she wished with flushed cheeks for one big, passionate romance before the start of college. She told herself the wish had nothing to do with Daryl Dixon.

The girl focused on school, her cheerleader practices, choirs, friends, and church, just like before. Only without a boyfriend taking up half of her time, and with her friends trying way too hard to find someone new for her. Almost every pajama party night ended with them talking about all of the boys they could set Beth up with, and to say that Beth didn’t appreciate it was an understatement. At least people got bored of teasing her about Daryl after a few weeks, and now barely anyone paid her any attention at school. She went to the prom with Noah, a shy boy who awkwardly asked if she had a partner during their school project group meeting. He didn't know how to dance, but he was funny and polite. Overall, she had a great time. And if the fact that Jimmy didn’t attend at all due to rumors that he gave a few girls chlamydia made her smile with satisfaction, nobody had to know.

Life was good again, and with the end of May and the beginning of June came something Beth had been waiting for: preparations for the Founder's Day Gala. Beth had been helping with it every year, and since Lilly was the school president this year, Beth, as her friend, was one of the people given the most responsibilities. The most important one was that she was supposed to open the FD Gala with one of her songs. Lilly insisted on this happening, and to be honest, the blonde girl was happy about it. Just a little bit scared and stressed. She sang at church sometimes, but only in a choir with a lot of other people. She’d never performed by herself in front of an audience, and although she intended to write and perform her own song, she soon realized that wasn’t a good idea. Not with how all of her lyrics turned out. She tried to explain this to Lilly, but her friend didn’t want to listen.

“You’re just stressed out, Bethy. I’m sure you’ve got something perfect in there. You just don’t see it.”

The thing was, she didn’t have anything that wasn’t about him, but she couldn’t exactly tell that to her friends. They couldn’t know, wouldn’t understand, and she was sure they’d be curious about this new “love interest” of hers if they read any of her recent songs. So Beth decided not to sing any of them. She decided to choose someone else’s song and not tell anyone but her music teacher before getting on stage.

Another problem was the dance. It was going to happen right after her song. You weren’t meant to have a partner. The tradition was for the ladies to pick their partners from the crowd, and hell, if it wasn’t the most awkward thing ever now that she didn’t have a boyfriend to pick. She’d have to go around looking for someone who wasn’t taken yet and would probably end up with no partner because she wouldn’t be fast enough. Especially since she’d have to get off the stage first, and they’d already start pairing before she even got down there. Yes, Beth was stressing out hard.

At least she didn’t get Cordelia’s, Peter’s, and Emily’s job. They had to go around the whole place, greeting people and offering them drinks. Instead, Beth was helping Amy with decorations, opening the whole thing with the song, and as she’d been picked as Miss of their city last year, along with Jimmy as Mr., they would both be presenting this year’s winners. Seeing as she wasn’t talking to Jimmy, it was probably going to be awkward standing next to him, smiling at the crowd, but somehow that seemed like the least of her problems. After weeks of him teasing her, she started filtering his voice, barely noticing when he spoke most of the time. There was someone else, though, that Beth noticed too much for her own good, and she knew he was going to be there too. 

Before Beth knew it, she was standing on the stage, ready to perform one of her favorite songs: “Strange Birds” by Birdy.

Beth sat by the piano and took a calming breath. There was no turning back now. She felt nervous, even shaking a little. Just as she was about to start playing, loud laughter and slurred talking entered the area. Beth startled and looked to her left to see members of the Feral Angels. They went silent after Rick and Shane approached them and said something that was probably close to “shut up or we’ll throw you out.” The place went quiet again, and Beth averted her eyes. Daryl was not among them. Good. She didn’t want to see him anyway. She really didn’t. Not at all.

Little ghost, you're listening,

Unlike most, you don't miss a thing,

You see the truth.

I walk the halls invisibly,

I climb the walls, no one sees me,

No one but you.

Her voice filled the hall, and Beth let the music take over her soul, allowing it to control her whole being.

Notes:

How did you like Rick's POV?
I was wondering for some time now if I should cut it out and change it into Daryl's POV, but I had so much fun with writing Rick's I decided to leave it here.
Don't worry though, you'll get a bit of Daryl's POV next chapter :)

Chapter 9: Now you look perfect

Summary:

At the Founder’s Day Gala, Daryl is drawn to Beth's vibrant presence on stage, while she feels a strong pull towards him, leaving both wondering about their unlikely connection. Will they act on their undeniable chemistry, or will their paths continue to remain apart?

Notes:

Thank you for your lovely comments on the last chapter <3 I'm glad you enjoyed Rick's POV :D
Now prepare for Daryl's ^^
And a bit of push and pull between our favorite duo...

Daryl entered the hall silently, spotting his friends almost instantly. They were all dressed in a way he’d never seen them before, as you couldn’t get in without the proper attire. Daryl himself was wearing a suit—one that obviously didn’t fit. It was old and borrowed from his uncle’s closet since Daryl didn’t have anything suitable for this kind of gala.

He was late because of his idiotic brother, who decided to come back to town on this very day and celebrate with hookers and drugs. Once they all passed out, it was Daryl who was left to clean up the mess. In all honesty, Daryl wasn’t sure why he even bothered. It would probably be an even bigger disaster after the biker came back from this godforsaken party.

Daryl hadn’t wanted to come here either, but his uncle insisted they show up and support the cause, as Founder’s Day was not only a celebration of the town’s founders but also a way to raise money for sick children. You had to pay to enter, and once inside, you could make a donation, which was what Daryl planned to do in the name of the Feral Angels—right after the song and dance. It was astounding how naive Jess still was, thinking a small donation could make the town view them more favorably.

Now, as he moved through the crowd of fancy-looking townsfolk, Daryl wished he could take a picture to show Jess exactly what he was up against. Father Matthias sneered at him from across the room, muttered something to the group of old ladies he was conversing with, and they all gave him similar disapproving looks. Daryl swept his gaze over the other faces gathered at the gala, recognizing a few people he’d checked during his illegal investigation into Sophia’s murder. The only thing that resulted from that was making even more enemies.

There was the music teacher, Thobias Wasilewski, who had taught Sophia. She often talked about him, as she took extra lessons with him after school hours. Daryl had checked all her teachers, but he was the only one without an alibi. He’d also looked into Ed’s drinking buddies, but most of them had been out drinking with Ed when she died, and the remaining few were working construction. Robert Groundlung pretended not to notice Daryl as they passed each other. He was the father of one of Sophia’s closest friends and had initially refused to give an alibi for the day of the murder until Daryl pressed him more forcefully. It turned out he was guilty of cheating on his wife, but nothing more. And then, of course, there was Father Matthias.

You've always loved the strange birds

Now I want to fly into your world

I want to be heard

My wounded wing's still beating,

You've always loved the stranger inside

Me, ugly pretty

It took Daryl far too long to realize he recognized the singer’s voice, but even after he found it familiar, he still couldn’t place it. Where had he heard it? Daryl glanced toward the stage and stopped abruptly at the sight of Beth Greene, dressed in the most beautiful gown he’d ever seen, sitting by the piano and filling the room with her voice.

Somehow, despite all his resentment toward the gala, the suit, and sharing space with people who not only feared him but also despised him—people whose eyes chastised him the moment he entered the hall—Daryl had forgotten about Beth Greene. He had honestly, truly forgotten that she’d be there. That he’d have to share this space with her as well, and that was worse than dealing with all the hateful glares he was receiving from everyone else. No amount of hostility from the townsfolk had ever made Daryl Dixon loathe himself as much as he did when he looked at that girl. Especially now, after Rick’s suspicions.

Daryl had learned a lesson beaten into his back a long time ago. It had been seared into his heart with every painful strike of a bat, with every cigarette burn his father had inflicted, and with every laugh he’d endured—first from classmates, and later from everyone else. Every scar on his back reminded him how much of a failure he was. Usually, it didn’t take more than one glance for others to know what he was. And what was that? A scumbag. A good-for-nothing redneck asshole. He was just as worthless as the dirt on someone’s shoe. He was no one. Nothing. He deserved nothing except more pain, another swing of the bat. Not from his father—the bastard had long since died—but from anyone who felt like it. And this was something Daryl was used to. He was accustomed to being regarded with disgust.

What Daryl wasn’t used to was kindness. What he couldn’t handle was a nice farm girl smiling at him like he deserved it. He didn't know what to do with himself when she was looking at him with that strange gleam in her eyes, a look he’d seen a few times but couldn’t, for the life of him, interpret. He didn’t understand her smiles, didn’t grasp why she looked at him the way she did, or why she seemed so damn happy every time she saw him. It made him uncomfortable.

Even more, the amount of kindness and sympathy the girl showed him was intolerable. It reminded him of every single reason why he didn’t deserve this kind of treatment from anyone, least of all her. She was too good, too innocent, too kind. And even though she had everything he’d never had, she wasn’t stuck-up. Maybe that’s why he couldn’t stand her—or at least that’s what he told himself. It had nothing to do with the big, disgusting thing he wasn’t supposed to think about.

Oh little ghost, you see the pain.

But together we can make something beautiful.

So take my hand and perfectly,

we fill the gaps, you and me make three.

I was meant for you, and you for me.

But once the big, disgusting thing crept into his mind, it refused to leave, and all Daryl could do was surrender to it. He couldn’t do anything but gape at the girl in the blue dress. The way she sat there singing, the fabric of her gown clinging to her body, her long blonde hair cascading down her shoulders in waves, and the way one corner of her lips curled into a small, barely-there smile at the end of each verse… everything about her was perfect.

He’d told Rick he’d never go for a girl like that, no matter her age, and he meant it. Watching her on stage, radiant and animated, reinforced that certainty. She was a world away from him—too good, too pure. A dirty redneck like him had no place in her life, and he felt a tightness in his chest at the thought of even considering her like this. 

He’d seen her as just another clueless kid when she first showed up at his door. But with every laugh they shared, every teasing word exchanged, those assumptions began to crack. Beth wasn’t just another Lizzie Thompson. And it wasn’t just her kindness that surprised him either; it was how she held her ground when he challenged her, how she made him smile without even trying. She spoke her mind, her laughter ringing out like music, and he felt something shift inside him every time she reached out with a gentle touch or soft word.

Daryl clenched his fists in his pockets, heart racing when he realized he forgot himself yet again.  He hated that he couldn’t quite keep his eyes away from her, even as he reminded himself she was just a naïve schoolgirl. He could push his feelings down, but it was always there, a whisper reminding him that she was different—more intriguing than he wanted to admit. A perverted asshole, that’s what he was, there was no escaping this conclusion now. He grimaced at the thought, averting his eyes from her finally.

“Shit, isn’t she beautiful?” Zach’s voice suddenly cut through Daryl’s thoughts, dragging him back to reality, where his friends were commenting and laughing at everyone and everything. Daryl was lucky he wasn’t standing too close to them—the only one who came to greet him was Zach. “And that voice, man! Oh, I can almost imagine how it would sound moaning my name when…Oi! What was that for?”

Zach began rubbing the back of his head where Daryl had hit him a moment ago, while the others laughed at his confusion. Daryl tore his gaze away from the blonde girl and glared at the twenty-year-old, who was somehow becoming his little shadow. It was like Daryl had suddenly acquired a younger brother he’d never wanted.

“You know what.”

Zach pouted but still started clapping when the song ended and another girl announced that it was time for the ladies to find their partners for the dance.

“You shouldn’t be hitting me. I got shot, remember?”

“Not in the head, jackass.”

“Still, I don’t have a clue what you’re talking about. Since when can’t I fantasize about girls?”

“Since it’s Beth Greene you’re talking about,” Daryl hissed at the boy, but it didn’t have the intended effect. Instead, it made Zach act the way most little idiots do when told they shouldn’t do something. Before Daryl could even process why he reacted the way he had, Zach started questioning him.

“And why’s that? You her chaperone or something?”

Why? If Daryl had to explain, he wouldn’t know where to start. Because it wasn’t right. Because no one should talk about Beth Greene like that. Because she was perfect, and even though Zach was much younger than Daryl, he was still too much of a scumbag to deserve a girl like her. Because it made Daryl’s blood boil. Because he just didn’t like anyone acknowledging the fact that Hershel’s daughter was anything but a schoolgirl. It was safer not to.

“She’s outta your league, boy. You’re barking up the wrong tree, that’s all,” Daryl said, the first thing that came to his mind. He didn’t want to sound too invested. Didn’t want to come off as someone who cared. Because he didn’t.

“We’ll see.”

“What?”

“Looks like she doesn’t have a dance partner.” Daryl looked toward the center of the hall, and sure enough, Beth Greene was one of the few girls who still hadn’t picked a partner. Daryl opened his mouth to protest, but just as he did, Beth glanced in their direction before quickly averting her eyes. Daryl barely had time to react, and that was even more confusing than her usual kindness. It was as if, suddenly, she thought he was contagious or something—as if she could catch something from merely looking at him.

It shouldn’t have surprised him as much as it did. Most people reacted to him like that, but Beth never had.

“Gonna go get her one,” Zach said, bringing Daryl’s attention back. Daryl was on the verge of brightly asking, “What?” again when the boy winked at him, turned, and headed off to rescue Beth from the dilemma of not having a dance partner.

If someone had asked Daryl how he felt about it, he wouldn’t have been able to say. Especially since, while Zach was inviting her to dance, Beth looked up again and sent Daryl a look—one he couldn’t begin to interpret, even if his life depended on it. She was the strangest girl, and for someone with as little experience dealing with women as Daryl—aside from screwing them in the backseat of his truck or in a dirty bar bathroom, then leaving as soon as he got what he wanted—understanding her was impossible.

“Wanna dance, Pookie?”

Beth smiled at Zach, but instead of taking his offered hand, she began talking to him. Daryl suddenly regretted not perfecting the art of lip reading.

It probably took him way too long to realize Carol had asked him a question as well.

“Nah, I’m good.”

His friend hummed in response while, on the other side of the hall, Beth turned away from Zach.

“Looks like our Casanova’s out of luck today,” Carol commented, apparently aware of what had transpired. As Zach walked back to them, pouting, Beth chose another boy from the crowd—one of the few young ones without a partner—and joined the dance.

“I hate you,” Zach muttered as he came to a stop in front of them. Daryl shot him a confused look, so the boy elaborated. “She said it’s against tradition for me to go ask her. Why didn’t you tell me about some kinda stupid tradition?”

“Dunno. Definitely not because I didn’t know about it either,” Daryl replied dryly.

“Well, no matter. Even if there wasn’t some tradition, she would’ve said no. You know why? She thought you sent me. Wanted me to tell you she could manage finding a dance partner without your help.”

Why on earth would Beth think that? Daryl furrowed his brow, searching the hall for her. Her blue dress stood out in the crowd of white, black, pink, and red, as she was the only one wearing that particular color. She smiled kindly at the boy she’d chosen to dance with, completely unbothered by his lack of dancing skills. Beth herself moved like she was born to it—with such grace and ease that it seemed as natural to her as breathing.

Dixon averted his eyes, guilt creeping in again. He shouldn’t be thinking about her like that. Shouldn’t even be looking at her. So what if she kept confusing him with her behavior? So what if she made him feel curious for the first time in forever? It didn’t matter. He didn’t matter. Therefore, nothing she thought about him mattered either.

*

The dance ended soon enough, and Beth thanked Noah for joining her. The boy smiled awkwardly, thanking her in return, and before she knew it, she was left alone again. It wasn’t as bad as she had expected, except for Zach coming over to rescue her from not having a partner. What was he thinking, breaking traditions like that? And what did Daryl think, sending him over? Did she really look so pitiful that even the biker had noticed?

Beth sighed and started looking for Lilly. She spotted her arguing with poor Emily, who looked like she was about to cry if the school president didn’t cut her some slack. That looked like a situation that needed Beth's intervention.

“What’s going on?” she asked, interrupting Lilly’s tirade.

“What’s going on is that Emily doesn’t want to do her job!”

“You know it’s not like that! Why should I suffer just because Peter and Cordelia are nowhere to be found? It’s not fair.”

“Suffer? You have one job, Em! And that job is to make sure everyone is comfortable and has something to drink!”

“And that’s exactly what I’m doing! It’s not like I’m getting paid for this, Lilly! I’m just helping out, so if I don’t wanna go over there, I won’t, alright?”

“Wait. Go where?” Beth interrupted again, still unsure what all the fuss was about.

Lilly sighed, clearly fed up.

“Emily doesn’t want to go over to Dixon and his friends to welcome them and offer them a drink—even though it’s her responsibility. And it’s not like they’re going to bite her!”

“Oh.” It had been a while since anyone had mentioned the Dixons around her, so it was almost strange to hear Daryl’s name coming from one of her friends. It was even more interesting to see Lilly giving Emily a hard time for being afraid of the bikers when Lilly herself had made it clear how much she despised them every time Daryl came up in conversation.

Emily and Lilly started bickering again, but Beth didn’t pay attention. Instead, she interrupted once more, “I can do that.”

Both girls fell silent.

“You can?” Emily asked at the same time that Lilly shot back, “It’s not your job, Beth.”

Beth shrugged as if it was nothing, though she could feel her heart beating a little faster with anticipation. She wanted to say she didn’t know what compelled her to volunteer, but that would be a lie. She knew exactly why. And what was wrong with a little chat anyway? Nothing, right? And if she wanted to gaze into those sweet blue eyes of his just for a moment, to hear his rough voice saying her name again, to pretend for a second that this morning at Rick’s place never happened—well, there was nothing wrong with that either, right? She was just helping out a friend, doing her job. Nobody would think anything of it.

“Yeah, I know. But I don’t mind. Just give me the tray.” Emily happily handed it over, and as for Lilly… Beth chose to ignore the confused look her friend was giving her. Instead, she took the tray with champagne and orange juice and started walking toward Daryl.

She held her head high, trying to appear confident, but inside, she was trembling. It had been far too long since they had been this close, and though Beth tried to convince herself her crush was long gone, it took one look at the man to shatter that illusion. It was as if she was seeing him for the first time.

Daryl Dixon looked so unlike himself in that suit. He seemed skittish, uncomfortable—that much was obvious before she even approached him. But what he probably didn’t realize was that he looked hot in it too. Did he notice the hungry stares some of the other women were sending his way?

What Daryl definitely took note of was Beth approaching. She was only halfway across the room when his blue, inscrutable eyes locked onto her, following every step she took. Beth would never admit how every nerve in her body reacted to his gaze. Her stomach clenched, and that strange flutter returned, like it had never left. Her heartbeat quickened, and her cheeks flushed, despite her best efforts to stay calm. But Beth didn’t look away. No, she held his gaze bravely, even managing to summon a sweet smile—the one she reserved just for him.

“Mr. Dixon.” Beth stopped right in front of the biker, smiling up at him. Now that she was wearing high heels, the height difference between them didn’t seem so great, and Beth found herself liking that fact. “On behalf of all the organizers, I’d like to welcome you to the Founder’s Day Gala. Would you like something to drink?”

The way Daryl was staring at her caused warmth to spread through her entire body, and she felt like she might vibrate right out of her skin. But she wasn’t about to let it show. Just like she wasn’t going to let the smile slip, even if his silence was making it hard to breathe.

“Evening, Beth. It’s good to see you too.”

Beth blushed heavily, not only because she hadn’t paid attention to the other people standing beside Daryl, but also because of the teasing in Carol’s voice. Something in the way Carol addressed her made Beth think she knew that Beth had hear eyes only for Daryl Dixon.

“Would you like something to drink?” Beth offered again, and Carol smiled sweetly, raising her hand to show the champagne she was already holding. Beth nodded, biting her lip and turning back to Daryl. He wasn’t scrutinizing her anymore but was instead staring at his boots, chewing on his thumb.

“Oh, champagne! Cool.” Zach reached for one of the glasses, but just as he was about to say something—probably to ask for another dance—Carol surprised everyone by saying:

“Come on, Zach. Don’t let the old lady down; dance with me, will you?”

Zach went with her, albeit reluctantly, leaving Daryl and Beth alone.

Beth cleared her throat, suddenly feeling shy and a bit foolish. It wasn’t like Daryl wanted to talk to her, so maybe she should leave him alone?

“So, how do you like it here?” she asked, fighting her insecurities. She earned herself a quick, intense glance in response.

“It’s…” Daryl paused, then finished, almost as an afterthought, “Fine.”

“You don’t sound too convincing, you know that, right?” She sent him an amused but kind smile, and in return, she got to see one corner of his mouth twitch into a half-smile.

“Just ain’t my kind of place,” he replied gruffly, glancing at her again. When their eyes met, Beth felt like she was drowning. The feelings he had stirred in her were coming back, as if they had never left, and she cursed herself for it.

“Your outfit begs to differ. It suits you, you know?” Beth tried hard not to show just how much she liked it, but it was impossible. He looked dashingly handsome, even though the suit didn’t quite fit him properly.

Daryl snorted and grumbled, “I look like an idiot.”

“No, you don’t,” Beth countered, quickly adding before he could argue, “You look good, Daryl. I bet there’s more than a few women here wondering why they never noticed how handsome you are.”

The compliment slipped out before she could stop herself. She blushed again, but this time, she wasn’t the only one. Daryl’s gaze dropped to his boots, and though his hair wasn’t quite long enough to hide his face, it was enough to conceal his reddening ears.

Beth had been prepared for the usual responses: Shut up. Stop. Don’t. I ain’t. But instead, Daryl cleared his throat.

“You look nice too.”

Oh.

“Thank you,” Beth whispered, smiling at him sincerely. Daryl nodded, still not meeting her eyes. It seemed like it had cost him a lot to say that out loud, and Beth felt a surge of gratitude for the effort. She immediately wanted to make it up to him.

“Is this the first time you’ve worn a tie?”

The question caught him off guard. He didn’t try to lie, and that warmed her even more. His honesty and shyness were making it incredibly hard not to like him, and the most peculiar part was that he had no idea how his behavior made Beth feel.

“Yeah. Why? Somethin’ wrong with it?” His tone turned defensive, but Beth wasn’t going to let it bother her.

She bit her lip to keep from smiling. She didn’t want him to think she was laughing at him.

“It’s not tied properly.”

“Oh yeah? And what do you know about this shit, girlie?” He sounded annoyed now, but he still spoke quietly, clearly not wanting to draw attention. It was possible people were already noticing how long they had been talking. Beth briefly wondered if her parents had seen her approaching Daryl. If they had, she’d have some explaining to do, and she wasn’t sure they’d be as easy to shake off as Rick had been.

“A lot. My father taught me how to tie a proper knot when I was, like, five.” Beth said calmly, earning herself another once-over. Before Daryl could get more defensive, Beth got straight to the point, despite all the alarms going off in her head. “I could fix it for you.”

Daryl stared at her, confusion and wonder in his eyes. Even before he spoke, Beth knew he would try to decline her offer. Letting her into his personal space, in front of all these people, was probably the worst idea. Her job was to offer a drink and walk away. Fixing his tie wasn’t in her responsibilities, nor was it something you’d expect a stranger to do. And that’s what she was to Daryl Dixon in the eyes of everyone present—except Rick Grimes, who’d seen them snuggling on his couch, which was probably even worse.

“Nah, it don’t matter,” Daryl said, shaking his head—exactly the response Beth had expected. She still wished it had been different. It bothered her that nobody would think twice if she helped someone else, but with Daryl, it might raise eyebrows. That thought alone made her angry enough to ignore her doubts.

“Oh, come on. It’s just a tie.” Beth set the tray down on a nearby table and moved to stand in front of Daryl. Their eyes met again, and she froze for a moment, seeing how startled he looked. “I mean, only if it’s alright with you?”

Not wanting to push him, she dropped her gaze to the floor while Daryl took his time to decide. When he stepped closer, right into her personal space, it took her by surprise.

“Go ahead,” he said, his voice low and husky.

A shiver ran down Beth’s spine. She took a steadying breath and moved closer too, focusing on his tie instead of the warmth radiating from his body or the faint scent of his cologne. She didn’t know what he was wearing, but he’d never smelled so good before. It made it hard to think.

“How are you, Daryl? Is… everything alright?” Her hands were shaking just a little and so was her voice but she couldn’t help it. Even though they were in a big hall full of city folks at that moment her world narrowed to her own hands on the man’s tie, to the sound of his breathing somewhere above her right ear, to his collarbone, a little stubble above, his warmth and smell. To her fingers untying his tie, evening it up on his chest and tying it again. It felt almost as intimate as waking up in his arms on that night they’ve spent together on Rick’s couch. Almost.

“Zach’s alive,” he said shortly, and Beth quickly pieced it together.

“Oh. That’s good.” She smiled up at him briefly before her gaze dropped to his lips. They were so close, just moistened by his tongue. It would take so little to lean in and kiss him. She looked down again, scolding herself for even thinking it. “But I was asking how you were doing. Not Zach.”

Daryl shrugged. “I’m alive,” came his bitter response just as Beth finished tying the tie. She raised her hands to fix the collar of his shirt, and when her fingers accidentally brushed the skin of his neck, she noticed the slight shudder that ran through him. She’d be lying if she said she wasn’t a little disappointed that her touch repelled him so much. But she kept her expression neutral—or at least, she hoped so.

“There you go. Now you look perfect.” Beth straightened his collar and looked up, her eyes meeting his.

“Thanks.” Daryl cleared his throat, his ears turning red again in response to her compliment.

Beth fumbled for something to say, not wanting the moment to end just yet. She knew it was inevitable—this was likely the last time they’d get to be this close. With college starting in September, what if she never had another chance to talk to him like this?

“So, did you and Carol come here together?” she asked, her heart thudding as she watched Daryl’s eyebrows furrow in confusion. She blushed, regretting her forwardness, but it was too late to take it back. “I mean, I heard her husband left after… Sophia. And I just thought, you know…”

Beth smiled awkwardly, trying to salvage the situation, but Daryl only continued to watch her as if he couldn’t figure out what she was trying to say.

“Me an’ Carol, we’re friends. Not…,” he began, but didn’t finish. His hesitation and confusion told Beth all she needed to know.

Before she could respond, Zach appeared out of nowhere, grinning. “Ha! I’m pretty sure there’s no rule against you dancing with me now!”

He was followed by a rather annoyed-looking Carol, and Beth quickly stepped back from Daryl, feeling flustered.

“Sorry, Zach. I’m on duty. Gotta get back on stage and deliver a speech in a minute.” It wasn’t true, but there was no way she was dancing with Zach. Not just because of his attitude, but because the only person she wanted to dance with was standing a few feet away.

“But there’s an after-party at the Bronze tonight, at eight,” Beth added, her eyes drifting back to Daryl. The words came to her without thinking. It was probably foolish—Daryl would never realize she was inviting him, not Zach. Still, she couldn’t stop herself. “If you show up, who knows? Maybe we could… dance then?”

Zach didn’t seem to notice that while Beth was teasing him about the dance, her eyes were locked on Daryl, and Beth hoped neither did Carol. She should probably start paying more attention to who was watching them, but instead, what really bothered her was how so many of their conversations were interrupted by others. Was the universe trying to tell her she shouldn’t be talking to him? But if that was the case, why did the same universe keep throwing them together in unexpected ways?

“Oh, I’ll be there, don’t you worry your pretty little head!” Zach said with a wink.

Beth picked up the tray from the table and smiled at the three of them, offering drinks again. “I won’t. Enjoy the gala.”

This time, Daryl took a glass of champagne from the tray and nodded at her. Just from looking into his eyes, Beth could tell that simple nod conveyed a lot: ‘thank you,’ ‘see you,’ and maybe even, ‘hope you have a good time too, sweetheart.’

Okay, maybe the ‘sweetheart’ part was just her imagination getting creative, but so what? She liked when Daryl called her that, even if it was just in her daydreams. No harm in letting herself imagine the biker saying it again, right?

Beth couldn’t tell if Daryl understood that the only reason she mentioned the Bronze was to let him know where she’d be spending the rest of her evening. And maybe it was for the best. He probably didn’t even care.

But still, she hoped he would show up. Even if just for a few more minutes of stolen conversation.

Notes:

Another chapter on Sunday - I'll keep adding the 'surprise' chapters in the middle of the week too <3
I keep rereading these chapters and editing them before updating the story - and oh boy, I'm pretty sure I'm just as excited about these updates as you are haha
Anyway, I hope you had fun reading that one too, 'see ya' again on Sunday xoxo

Chapter 10: Let’s get out of this shithole

Summary:

Beth doesn't think Daryl will come to see her at the Bronze, but she can't help but wait for him.
Daryl doesn't think he should go to the Bronze, doesn't think he should be anywhere near Beth, but the nagging feeling in his gut pulls him toward the club.

Notes:

I wanted to say something here, but I kept spoiling the chapter, so instead I'll let you read it in peace xD.
Have fun <3

“I think it’s okay for you to go.”

“Go where?”

Daryl shut the engine down and took the cigarettes out of his pocket, deliberately not looking over at Carol. He knew exactly what she was talking about, and to say that he didn’t like it was an understatement.

“The Bronze.”

Daryl snorted. The reason Carol pointed out that it was ‘okay for him to go’ was because she probably noticed that something was bothering him and guessed quite rightly that this something was Beth Greene going to that club. It was the only club that let in minors, and although they didn’t sell alcohol to them, it was located in a shady neighborhood by the truck docks and railroad tracks. It was where a lot of kids went to have fun, but also where the drug dealers went to make money and where a lot of not-so-lawful deals were made. It shocked Daryl a little when Beth said she was going to be there. He guessed that yet again her parents didn’t know where she was going to spend a good part of her night, and that knowledge just didn’t sit right with him.

You’re her chaperone or something?

Zach’s mocking voice interrupted his thoughts, creating a grimace on the biker’s face. That kid was right. It wasn’t any of his business. If Beth wanted to spend her night there, she could do so. And anyway, she was going to be busy with Zach, so there was nothing for Daryl to do there. His little shadow might have been a shithead, and perhaps he used his dick more often than his brain, but if there was one thing Dixon was sure of, it was that Beth would be safe with him. So really, there was no reason for him to go there.

“Why would I? It’s gonna be packed with stupid college kids.”

Carol fell silent for a moment, probably readying herself for the argument. Oh, how Daryl wished she would just go away and leave him alone for once. He didn’t need any of her advice. Not only because it rarely helped, but also because Daryl was quite pissed at his friend for inviting Zach to dance and leaving him alone with Beth. Not that Carol realized how bad it was for her to do so. She just wanted to dance and saw an opportunity to do so—no ill intent behind it—and Daryl knew, rationally, he shouldn’t be mad at her for it. He just couldn’t help himself.

“You said she could be next. Wouldn’t it be wise for you to be there?”

“I ain’t her damned bodyguard,” Daryl hissed, and added grumpily in an afterthought, “Zach’s gonna be there. He can take care of her.”

It wasn’t like Zach knew he should watch out for something, though. The boy could easily miss something important, too busy exchanging his saliva with the blonde girl. The thought of that made him even more annoyed.

“If it makes you feel any better, I don’t think she wants him to.”

Carol interrupted his thoughts, and for a second, he actually thought she meant kissing. Even though she didn't, the implications of her words were pretty clear to him, and it did nothing to make Daryl less furious. Carol, for some inexplicable reason, got it into her head that Beth’s sympathy for him and his interactions with her were a good thing. It made him feel kind of pathetic, knowing that she thought him lonely enough to need an acquaintance with a teenage girl. It also made no sense to him, but then again, Carol always saw him as a better man than he actually was.

“Why would that make me feel any better? It’s not like I care.”

Because why would he? Daryl knew Zach well enough to know that he’d be ‘in love’ with the girl for a few more weeks, but once they actually had sex, Zach would get bored. Then it would be another few weeks of the boy thinking of a way out of this relationship. Beth would end up with a broken heart. It didn’t take a genius to predict that. Zach’s pattern was clear enough. But even with that knowledge, it wasn’t any of Daryl’s business. If she wanted to get involved with that boy, then Daryl had no say in it, and if she didn’t… well, he shouldn’t care for it either. His earlier thoughts on the subject be damned.

“Right. Of course. Forgive me, for a second there I mistook you for that other guy. You know, the one that took that girl home at night because he didn’t want her to wander alone, scared her good in the morning, and then got her back to a friend’s house safely.”

So what? He didn’t leave her on the streets because somebody could hurt her. It was what anyone else would do in his place. Why would Carol bring this to the discussion? Daryl would ask. He really would. But that would mean that he cared, and he didn’t. Beth might have piqued his curiosity, but that didn’t mean anything. In fact, if the big disgusting thing , that revealed itself to him at Rick’s for the first time and kept bothering him since, was anything to go by, he should stay as far away from her as possible.

“You know that one, right? He has also spent the last month brooding over the fact that she snuggled him at night and…”

Enough. This woman was crossing the line. He wasn’t brooding.

“I swear I ain’t tellin’ you shit no more.”

Daryl grimaced, not appreciating this subject at all. Sometimes he really wondered what possessed him to share any kind of private information with Carol. Especially when it came to Beth Greene, and not only because Carol was being nosy about it. But also, and maybe mainly, because she thought that this whole thing with Beth was just him trying to replicate that sweet, familial bond he had with Sophia. It would be really touching if that was the case, but it wasn’t like Daryl had any desire to admit to being a creepy, perverted bastard to anyone anytime soon. Next time something happens, Daryl promised himself, he’s going to shut his stupid mouth and swallow the guilt instead of getting drunk and spilling his guts to this tactless woman. Not that anything was going to happen. Not that anything did happen in the first place.

“Oh, come on, Dixon. You care about her, admit it. The world won’t collapse if you say it out loud, you know? There’s nothing wrong with having sympathy towards people we usually don’t acquaint ourselves with, right?”

I don’t care.

She’s just some girl.

Everything is wrong with that.

“It ain’t like that. I just don’t want any other girl to end up like…”

Daryl stopped himself before uttering the name. Perhaps saying that to the girl’s mother wasn’t a good idea. Perhaps bringing Sophia into the conversation, when he wanted, no, desperately needed to not invite comparisons between her and Beth, was not the brightest idea.

Carol smiled sadly.

“Like Sophia. Is that what you wanted to say?”

“I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be. I don’t want any other girl’s life to be destroyed like this either.”

They sat in silence for another minute or two, the only sound being him lighting up another cigarette.

“I just want to catch this motherfucker.”

It wasn’t a lie. He wanted to catch him. Wanted to punish him for Sophia. For building a barn in the woods where he kept his trophies. For thinking of hurting those girls from the pictures hung in that barn that to this day didn’t realize were in danger. For every damn photo of innocent, unsuspecting girls the sick fucker took. For looking at Beth Greene and thinking about hurting her.

Daryl was glad they found his barn, even though there were no prints there, no evidence other than the pictures. At least they knew who to look out for the most. Rick thought that the fucker could move away if he realized they found his secret stash, that he could just as easily go look for another girl instead, but Daryl didn’t believe he would. Not after what Sophia wrote in her journal. He was really invested in those girls. In every single one of them. And from the looks of it, Beth Greene had also made it into the wall of shameless fixations along with a few other girls. There was no way of knowing which one of them could be next, though.

“It’s been months, Daryl. Maybe you were wrong? Rick thinks…”

“That fucker lived here for years. Abused more than one girl, here and in the few towns around, and no one realized. He’s still here. Just waiting. Thinking of another victim.”

Carol sighed, and Daryl suddenly regretted talking about it. Now his friend would probably spend her evening crying her eyes out and blaming herself for not having seen it coming. Wondering if that monster abused Sophia for long. Wondering why she was too engrossed in her own unhappy marriage to notice that something was wrong with her daughter. That she was getting sick and missing school more and more… until someone laid her down in a bed of roses.

They didn’t find out why he did it. The only person that could answer them was that monster, but he ceased to exist, and the only lead that Daryl found was that barn in the woods in which he kept his trophies and the pictures. A lot of pictures. Few of the girls that were already dead or missing. Few of the ones alive.

Daryl had no luck, though. The monster didn’t show up in the barn again. He abandoned his cave, leaving Daryl with nothing else to do but to watch the girls from the pictures closely over the span of the last few months in the hopes that the bastard would strike again. He didn’t. Perhaps he changed his targets entirely, knowing that Daryl was after him, but there was still the possibility that the pedophile, the murderer, was just waiting it out.

The silence stretched between the two friends for another moment, both engrossed in their own thoughts, before Carol finally struck the final blow.

“I don’t know, Daryl, but if you’re so sure he’s still here, then why aren’t you watching over Beth right now?”

The thing was, the plan didn’t involve all those unnecessary interactions. The plan was to make sure that when that monster came for her, Daryl would be there. It didn’t include Beth staying at his place for the night. It didn’t involve them talking at all.

Daryl was supposed to watch her from a distance while the other guys kept an eye on two other girls from the photographs in the barn. But then he left to visit Carol that one night, knowing Beth was safe with friends at her boyfriend’s place, and then Beth was being reckless, wandering the streets at night, and then things escalated pretty quickly from that. 

One moment, she was dripping wet on his floor, and the next, she was pulling her pants down in front of him. Being silly. Teasing him. Coming to his work and asking how he was. Making him spend the night at Rick’s place. Snuggling him on the sofa. Fixing his tie. Complimenting his looks. Making something stir in his gut. The big, disgusting, scary, awful thing. It wasn’t right, and it wasn’t the plan. In fact, it could jeopardize every chance he had at finding and catching Sophia’s murderer. If that monster was watching her, he’d have to notice their acquaintance, and nobody would be insane enough to come after a girl that hung around Daryl Dixon.

And the worst part was that it should be a bad thing, because if the monster didn’t strike, Daryl would have no opportunity to catch him. But when he thought about Beth Greene, all he felt was hope. Hope that this monster saw them together and got the message, and thinking like that, caring like that, was dangerous.

“She’s gonna be fine. Zach’s with her,” the biker gritted out.

Carol sighed again, and Daryl could see her shaking her head at him.

“Alright, do whatever you feel is best, Daryl.”

Carol finally left his car. Daryl started the engine and turned the car in the direction of his house, hoping that Merle and his coke whores were out or at least still passed out.

*

The Bronze pulsed with life, filled with the familiar sounds of laughter and music. Apart from the organizers of The Founder’s Day, a mix of kids from their high school and a slew of strangers from parts of the city Beth had never visited crowded the dance floor. The dim lighting flickered, creating a warm glow as colorful lights swirled around the room, casting shadows on couples dancing in suggestive ways or stealing kisses. Beth, normally not one for partying, felt even more out of place amidst this chaotic energy, so she positioned herself on one of the sofas in the corner as far from the dance floor as possible, nursing her soda.

In all honesty Beth would rather sit at home in the silence of her own room, but that wasn’t a way to get the older man to like you. So instead, she was here, abandoned by her friends, who would rather spend their time on the dance floor than talking to her, or so it seemed. Perhaps it was her fault though as she wasn’t really in the mood for the Bronze, mainly because, recently, it seemed that everyone was dating someone. Therefore, the whole dancing scene was full of couples either moving in a very suggestive way or kissing. It wasn’t even about jealousy; Beth didn’t want to be there among all those bodies with a boyfriend. No, she didn’t want to be there at all. She wanted to be somewhere else with Daryl. Somewhere they could talk. Somewhere she could listen to his hushed, husky voice instead of the loud, blaring music.

Beth Anne Greene, this needs to stop. This man doesn’t want you the way you want him, and those delusions of yours almost got him in trouble once already.

She’d tell herself that, but it did nothing to change the fact that every time the doors opened, her heartbeat would quicken, and she’d tense up in anticipation. For what?

He’s not coming, Beth.

But what if he is?

“Hi, gorgeous. How about you stop sulking and have a drink with me instead?”

Some guy sat next to her, but Beth didn’t even raise her head to look at him.

“Sorry, I don’t drink.”

“Oh, you’re not twenty-one yet? No worries, baby girl. I can take care of that.”

A grimace appeared on Beth’s face as she finally raised her head to look at the man who thought that just because she was sitting there alone, he could hit on her.

*

Carol was right. Going home might not have been the best idea. Daryl had planned to head straight for his bedroom, but of course, that didn’t happen. The moment his messed-up brother spotted him, he perked up and invited Daryl to join the group gathered in their living room. In the older Dixon’s world, the invitation meant, “You don’t get to check out like this,” so Daryl ended up on one of the kitchen chairs, watching a football game from the kitchen table and trying not to notice how a drunk coke whore was clinging to his brother on the couch. Merle was squeezing, smooching, and making out with her like they were alone, while the other three guys did the same with all the other drunk, drugged women in the room.

What Daryl tried hardest to ignore was how one of the women kept shooting him heated glances from over Santucchi’s shoulder, trying to catch his attention with a mix of noises and gestures while staring right at him. It was downright disgusting, and he had never felt so grateful when his phone started ringing about half an hour later.

Bored and not drunk enough to enjoy the company of his jackass brother and his friends, Daryl seized the opportunity to escape the room. He made a beeline for his bedroom, pulling out his phone as he walked. He was taken aback to see that it was Zach calling him.

“Yeah?” Daryl answered, even more surprised when he didn’t hear the usual party noise in the background. It wasn’t late enough for the kid to be back from The Bronze.

“Hi, Daryl. I know it’s gonna sound weird, but are you busy?”

Daryl thought about it for a second. It might have been wiser to say he was, but Zach was supposed to be with Beth right now, and Daryl was too curious about the purpose of this call to dismiss it. He just hoped the kid hadn’t gotten Greene in trouble.

“Not really. What’s the deal?”

Zach cleared his throat on the other side of the line, and Daryl knew immediately that he wasn’t going to like whatever he had to say.

“Well, you know how I promised Beth I’d be at The Bronze tonight?”

“Mhmm?”

“My mom didn't call to tell me she’s coming for dinner tonight, she just showed up. And I know, I know, you told me I shouldn't have kept avoiding her for that long, but now she won't leave and I can't go anywhere... And I know you don’t really care, but once you stand up a girl like Beth, she’s not going to go out with you again, so I was thinking maybe you could go have a beer at the Bronze and explain what happened while you’re at it?”

Zach finally stopped babbling and fell silent, waiting for Daryl's answer.

“Why do you care so much? You’ve seen her maybe twice…” Daryl mumbled, trying and failing to justify why he had the keys to his truck in hand and was already heading out the door the moment Zach said I can't go anywhere. While Zach tried to explain why this mattered to him, Daryl got out of the house, grateful that Merle had chosen that moment to pass out and wouldn’t question him.

“Do you even have eyes, Daryl? She’s like the most beautiful girl I’ve ever seen. Not just beautiful, either. She’s perfect, man. Drop-dead gorgeous, talented, smart—the way she smiled at me tonight…”

“Alright, I get it.” Daryl interrupted him in mid-sentence. “I’ll talk to you later.”

“But…”

Daryl hung up and climbed into his truck. He didn’t care in the slightest whether Zach was going to score that date. Though he had to admit that Gallner seemed genuinely smitten with Beth in a way he hadn’t been with any of the girls he’d “dated.” Normally, Zach wouldn’t care if a girl went out with him or not, nor would he bother to ask someone to cover for him. That was surprising. But did it mean Daryl wasn’t feeling a strange sense of relief and weird satisfaction at the thought that Zach wasn’t busy thrusting his tongue down Beth’s throat at that moment? No, it didn’t.

He told himself it didn’t matter, though. All he wanted was to make sure Beth was safe. Suddenly, all that Carol had told him and everything Daryl knew rushed back, making him feel guilty for not watching over the girl. Maybe he was just paranoid. Perhaps whoever that monster was had already moved on to another victim, and Daryl was wasting his time following Beth around. But he had a hunch, and if there was one thing he trusted, it was his intuition.

Daryl turned into the alley where the club was located, and as if by some miracle, the first thing he saw was Beth Greene opening a car’s passenger door. Daryl didn’t have time to analyze the situation. He stopped his truck in the middle of the street and bolted out of it as if the devil himself were chasing him.

“Beth!” She had one leg in the car, ready to sit down and be taken somewhere, and Daryl didn’t even consider the possibility that it might be her friend’s car or that it might not be threatening at all—because all he could see was her getting into that car, never to be seen again.

She heard him, and when she turned around, straightening up, the most beautiful, honest smile broke across her face. The way Beth Greene’s eyes lit up at the sight of Daryl Dixon would have taken anyone’s breath away. Daryl himself didn’t notice, though; he was too focused on not letting her get in that car.

“Daryl!” she shouted, stumbling back from the car, her phone in one hand, her handbag already tossed on the seat. “I thought you’d never—"

Her voice slurred, too cheerful, her eyes glassy. Daryl’s gut twisted, alarms going off in his head before he even heard the engine rev. Something was wrong.

“Get away from the car!” he yelled, already moving, heart pounding. She blinked at him, confused, wobbling on her heels, but something in his tone cut through the haze. Beth’s smile vanished, and she stepped back just as the tires screeched.

The car lurched forward fast. The smell of burning rubber filled the air, the car disappearing into the night.

“My purse—jackass!” Beth screamed, staggering, almost toppling in those ridiculous heels. Her blue dress fluttered as she swayed, arms flailing to keep her balance.

The car was gone. Too fast. Too smooth. And his heart raced with a single thought: they knew exactly what they were doing, and if he got here a minute later…

When Beth swayed in his direction again, Daryl grabbed onto her, emotions overruling reason.

“What the hell, Beth?! Didn’t I tell you to be careful?! Jesus Christ!” Daryl shook her, but when all he got in response was her confused stare, he let go of her shoulders, feeling anger boil inside him. “Didn’t you learn anythin’ when I told you I was going to sell you to some perverted asshole?! Thought you’d get it, but no, the first time you’ve got a chance, you just go getting your stupid ass drunk like some dumb college bitch!”

“Stop shouting at me! What are you even talking about? I don’t drunk, Daryl!” Beth raised her voice back at him, swaying even more, her tongue and brain apparently not syncing right.

“You don’t drunk, huh?! Then what the hell am I looking at?!”

“I’s just sitting at the Bronze talking to that guy and suddenly the room started swaying. I din’t feel rght so he said he’ll go with me outside.” Beth held her hand to her forehead while talking, grimacing at the pain and trying to stand still but failing miserably. At that moment, Daryl regretted shouting at her. That guy probably put something in her drink when she wasn’t looking. Daryl couldn’t really blame her for it, could he?

“Give me your phone.” Beth looked surprised but passed him the phone. Daryl didn’t take it, though, instead rolling his eyes at her. “Unlock it first.”

Beth did so, and this time Daryl took it from her.

“What are you doin’?” Beth asked, gazing up at him.

“Next time you need a ride or need air when you’re out or something, just call me.” Daryl finished typing his number in, pressed the green button, waited for the phone call to connect, then disconnected it and gave her the phone back. “Just don’t go taking rides from strangers no more.”

Daryl scowled, and Beth picked up on it instantly. She hold onto her phone, swaying a few more times, before she said with a frown, “I don’t take rides from anyone.” Daryl wanted to ask why she had gone with whoever was behind the wheel then, but before he could form the question, she was already telling him with a bit of a slur but still pretty clear for someone who was probably drugged: “Wanted to find m’friends but couldn’t see them ant that man just took me out and git the car. Said it’s aright, I can trust him. I wanted to stay but he just… I don’t know, I was outside and he was smiling, it’s okay, and he got in the car… And then… then I saw you!”

Her distress was suddenly gone, and when she looked up at him, Daryl got to witness another of that drunk-ish but still sweet and full of genuine happiness smiles. The next thing he knew, she was swaying again, and before he even thought of helping her out, she was falling right into his arms. While Daryl struggled to keep her and himself standing straight, the girl started laughing, the sound vibrating on the naked skin right under his collarbone.

Daryl thought she’d try to wiggle herself out of this, but instead, Beth seemed to fall even more into him, putting her arms around Daryl’s middle and pillowing her head on his chest. Not only did it make Daryl feel awkward, but it also reminded him of the last time she did that, which made him feel sick. Daryl would shake her off himself. He really would. If he wasn’t so sure she was going to fall again. Keep telling yourself that , said the big disgusting thing in his mind.

They kept swaying for a moment longer as Daryl tried to figure out what course of events he should take. It wasn’t like he had a lot of possibilities. He couldn’t exactly take her back to his place this time. Not with Merle and all the other scumbags around. Finding her friends would be a hardship too because he had no idea what most of them looked like. Even if he could find them, nobody would let him into the Bronze with an inebriated teenager, and Daryl was not leaving Beth Greene alone outside. Too many bastards were wandering around this area looking for an easy target.

“I guess you didn’t tell your parents where you were going this time either, huh?” Daryl had to ask, though wishing against all the odds that she lied again. Even though Daryl couldn’t take her back to his place, knocking on Hershel Greene’s door with his daughter hanging on Daryl’s shoulder wasn’t the biggest dream of his either. Not to mention actually explaining to the man what happened.

Beth didn’t answer him for a long moment, and Daryl actually started thinking that she might have fallen asleep standing when Beth suddenly mumbled into his skin, “You smell so good.”

Daryl cleared his throat, trying and failing not to notice the way Beth pressed her small body into his, dragging her nose up on his skin while breathing him in.

“Ain’t what I asked.” The man tried again, feeling slightly embarrassed when his voice came out trembling.

He felt Beth’s fingertips on his chin, and his eyes closed on their own violation when just a moment later she caressed his face in her small slim hand. Beth’s lips moved on his neck—not really kissing but rather touching shyly as if even intoxicated, Beth Greene still felt self-conscious enough to worry about doing something wrong.

With his throat suddenly dry, the only word he managed to utter was a shaky, “Stop.”

The man felt like drowning, and all because some girl put her hands on him. But that wasn’t really true, was it? She wasn’t just some girl, and that fact made all of it even worse.

Suddenly Beth’s lips left Daryl’s neck on their own, and for a moment—a very short moment—the man was able to breathe again. But if he thought it was the end of his problems, then he was wrong again, because when he finally opened his eyes, he was met with the blue, shiny eyes of Beth Greene looking up at him, and if this small, tense space between them was anything to go by, Daryl Dixon was in huge trouble.

“You know what’s the best thing about you?” Beth asked. Her voice came out hoarse, but it didn’t stop her from giggling for a bit before answering her own question. “You’re so hot and you don’t even know it.”

“Beth.” Daryl managed to get only her name out, and he meant it as a warning for her. However, this little whine of his sounded as far away from warning as Daryl was from being a decent man. No wonder that blondie didn’t listen to him. No wonder that no more than a few seconds later, Beth was pushing herself onto her toes and kissing him.

Beth pressed her lips to his with the kind of desperation Daryl wouldn’t think she possessed. Daryl went even more stiff, pressing his lips together tightly, his hands squeezing her shoulders so firmly it must have been painful.

It took her only a few seconds to realize he wasn’t responding. She moved away, making a frustrated huff. Daryl breathed a sigh of relief, taking a step back and licking his lips to get rid of the feeling of her soft lips on his. He took a few calming breaths, readying himself to tell her off while Beth stared at his mouth as if it personally offended her.

Right when Daryl opened his mouth to warn her not to ever kiss him again, Beth dove right back. The impact made him sway a little, but he managed to stay on his feet while she took his lower lip between hers, caressing it gently. A low guttural groan rumbled through Daryl’s throat as the big disgusting thing roared in his chest, and she took his slightly opened mouth as an invitation, sliding her tongue in and kissing him hard, if a little sloppy.

The sudden combination of want and disgust that surged through him was what made him act. His hand went up to her neck and then higher. It seemed to him that it took him an eternity to react appropriately; that he let her kiss him for way too long. But in reality, it all happened very fast. One second, he was stubbornly not kissing her back, and the next, he was gently but firmly pushing her face away.

“Fuck,” Daryl cursed under his breath. “Stop kissin’ me for fuck’s sake!”

Beth whined, and Daryl had to ignore another involuntary reaction of his body.

“But why?”

He almost didn’t hear her over the noise from the club when a few people went outside for a cigarette, and perhaps for the better, since she sounded rather close to moaning, and that was something Daryl had never wanted to hear from Beth Greene. Never, huh? The voice in his head mocked. Just shut up, shut the fuck up!

Daryl regarded all the guys who came out of the club, still distancing himself from Beth, but not one of them looked their way. Too drunk to see past their smokes, Daryl concluded, breathing heavily, his whole body shaking from emotion.

“You know damn well why!” Daryl growled at her, finally getting his body under control and his voice along with it. He let go of Beth’s face and took her by the hand instead, ignoring the warmth spreading through his bones. “Come on. Let’s get out of this shithole.”

“But I wanna kiss you,” Beth whined again, and Daryl snorted, feeling quite hysterical. Because let’s be honest here, how many times had he witnessed scenes like this? A drunk girl hanging off her man’s arm, pleading with him to make out with her. Horny bitches, Merle would call them, and Daryl would laugh. But Daryl wasn’t her man, and she wasn’t his to take for so many reasons that it was hard to count them all.

“You don’t. You were drugged, you have no idea what you’re talking about and you’re gonna regret this in the mornin’.” He sounded steady when he spoke to her, even though everything inside him shook with panic. Yet again, his awful upbringing came in handy. Being raised by someone like Will Dixon meant you had to learn how to hide your feelings and never show any weakness—otherwise, there would be consequences. So Daryl did what he knew best: he pushed it all down and away.

Daryl got to the passenger door and opened it for her, but Beth, instead of getting in, pulled her hand out of his and crossed her arms over her chest, swaying a little.

“No, I won’t.”

Daryl sighed. Not only was she a teenager, but now she was behaving like one, which made it pretty hard for him not to feel guilty. He should’ve pushed her away right away. Shouldn’t have let her kiss him the second time, or even the first. Just shouldn’t have let her get so close overall. Guilt hit him harder than ever, but he squashed it down like everything else.

“You will. Now, get in the car.” Daryl reached for her and grabbed her hand, but Beth ripped it away, stepped back too quickly, and, just as Daryl feared, tripped and landed on her ass. Daryl rubbed his forehead, suddenly very tired. The only thing that would actually make this whole ordeal even worse would be for someone to take an interest in him trying to get a teenager in his truck and kick his ass for it. “Look, if someone sees us together, I’m gonna get in trouble, so why don’t you just do me a favor and get in the car?”

Daryl stopped rubbing his forehead and looked down at the girl, who tried to get up and failed miserably, dropping onto the cold ground again.

“Here. Take my hand.” Daryl offered, and even though Beth still looked offended, she grabbed onto him and let him pull her up. She didn’t let go of Daryl’s hand after that, though, squeezing it in hers and searching his eyes with an intent that made the biker feel uncomfortable again. It was that anxiety that made Daryl usher her inside before she had the chance to speak her mind or, worse, kiss him again. This time, Beth didn’t argue with him, and just a minute later, Daryl Dixon was sitting on the driver’s side next to the still intoxicated Beth Greene.

“Will you tell me now if your parents expect you to get back home tonight?”

“Why, Mr. Dixon? You wanna take me to your place again?” Beth tried to sound flirtatious, but in fact, she sounded more like she was on a fast track to falling asleep than anything else and even yawned right after uttering her question.

Daryl snorted and then rolled his eyes at himself when he realized that the first thing that came to his mind was not that it was funny or pathetic but actually adorable.

Before he could get into questioning her again, Beth added, “Only lied to them that one time… Not… I’m not proud of it, ‘right? They know. I was supposed to be back by ten. I think?”

“Shit.” Daryl was not happy about it. He had already come up with where he’d take the girl for the night if they didn’t expect her to come back. Rick’s place was the best shot. He could tell him what transpired, have him check the streets for a car like the one Daryl had seen right away. Then Rick could be the one to tell Hershel about this situation in the morning. “I guess a short text that you’re not coming back for the night won’t work, huh?”

“Nuh-uh.” That was the blonde’s only response, and when Daryl looked across the seats a moment later, it was only to be met with the sight of Beth Greene sleeping with her head pillowed on the window of his car.

Alright then. Seems to me that you’re gonna have to deal with Hershel Greene after all, Dixon, he thought to himself before starting the car.

In all honesty, Daryl had no idea how he was going to explain to Hershel what exactly happened while also trying not to let it show that approximately half an hour before, the farmer’s daughter had her hands and lips on him. And that he, the old redneck asshole that he was, had let her kiss him even though he knew damn well that the girl was drugged. You fuckin’ proud of yerself now? He asked the big disgusting thing in his mind and snorted at himself when he realized he was talking to his own damn self like some psycho. You’re losin’ your mind, Dixon, all because of one girl.

Notes:

I think someone in the comments on the last chapter said they had a feeling something might happen at the Bronze... so congrats, you were right! <3

Also, I just wanted to say that I finished editing the last two chapters of this story, and oh boy, what a ride it was! I think I got way too invested in Beth's and Daryl's shenanigans during the last few weeks of editing. Finishing it made me strangely emotional, I have to admit, so I'm glad there are still many chapters to post. Now I can live vicariously through you as you read it all!

Chapter 11: It matters to me

Summary:

Beth wakes up the next day and faces the aftereffects of the night before.
With no memory of what happened, she decides to visit Daryl. Will he help her remember or confuse her even further?

Notes:

Happy Halloween everyone! :)

It's a lovely day for a new chapter of push-and-pull between Beth and Daryl, don't you think?
Let's see how Daryl handles the fact that Beth kissed him!

Beth woke up in her bed, a vague memory of being at the Bronze, talking to some guy, and then feeling very bad flickering through her mind. After that, there was nothing. She didn’t know if or how she got out of the club. Didn’t know how she got back home. Wait—did she get back home? Was she even sure it was her bed she was lying in?

Beth had never bolted out of bed as fast as she did that morning, and right after, she stopped, her legs almost buckling under her as an awful dizziness hit her. She stood still, squeezing her eyes tightly and waiting for her tummy to stop churning dangerously. Oh, this was bad. 

Beth wasn’t sure how long she stood there, fighting sickness, before she finally managed to open her eyes and take her surroundings in. She sighed with relief.  She was at home. Safe. There was no one to fight, nobody kidnapped her. 

And…

Daryl Dixon hadn’t come running either. Beth scrunched her nose at the last thought. Great. She had just experienced one of the biggest scares of her life, was still confused,  unsettled and feeling sick, and one of her first concerns is what? The fact that Daryl Dixon doesn’t want her? Ugh, girl…

Beth sighed, frustrated by herself, and slowly let herself drop back on the bed, her eyes landing on her phone lying atop a pile of clothes neatly folded on the chair. Maybe her phone held some answers? Yet again she made sure to move slowly to not upset her head and stomach as she reached for it. She had a few missed calls from Lilly, Amy, and Thomas, along with a few texts, and she skimmed through them quickly.

09:12 PM Amy

Where are you?! I’ve been looking for you everywhere!

09:16: Lilly

It’s not funny, Beth! Answer your phone!

09:23 Tom

Did you go home? Why didn’t you tell us? I could’ve taken you back😟

09:34 PM Amy
You have to stop disappearing like that, B… Just please let me know you’re okay, yeah?

10:02 PM Tom:
OMG, Beth! Your mom is so mad at us! She thinks we didn’t help you. What’s going on?

10:04 PM Amy:
WTF?! Call me when you wake up!!!

Beth sighed and put her phone down, rubbing her temple as a dull ache pulsed in her head. She tried to shake her memory back. She closed her eyes, her eyelids heavy and warm, and focused on the night before.

There had been a guy hitting on her, but Beth hadn’t paid him too much attention. She remembered that he’d bugged her for quite a while, unwilling to go away, trying to make her smile. There was one moment when he even made her laugh at something. He’d seemed way too old to be talking to her, and she remembered feeling uncomfortable as he grew visibly annoyed with her for constantly looking toward the door, hoping Daryl might come through.

Okay, that she remembered. What happened next?

She started feeling unwell. Her head began throbbing, and the room swayed a few times, so the man had gotten her some water. He said some fresh air could help because it was pretty humid in the club. She argued, insisting she needed to tell her friends, but she couldn’t see them in the crowd. Everyone looked the same, the room swaying even more, and Beth felt queasy as she looked around. That was when she’d decided she needed air. 

Now that Beth focused, she could almost remember pushing through the crowd, using her hand against a wall to steady herself from falling. And then—a blank.

Beth huffed in frustration, trying in vain to pull more from her memory. It seemed like the only way to get any information on how she made it home would be to head downstairs and see what her parents had to say, but her bed was so warm and comfy. Perhaps it could wait a little? 

It was a few hours later when Beth woke up from a nap, feeling much better, and descended down to the kitchen. Her head was still throbbing faintly, but apart from that she seemed to be in a much better shape than before, or so she thought.

When she entered the kitchen, her mom was making breakfast for the whole family, which meant it was still early. Early enough that Shawn and Daddy hadn’t returned from the morning chores.

“Good morning, Mom.”

“Oh, Betty, you’re awake! God bless! How are you feeling, honey?” Her mom rushed over in seconds, hugging her, kissing her forehead, and checking her eyes for any signs of disturbance.

“I’m fine, Mom. I just have a little headache,” Beth replied, biting her lip as sudden nerves took over. “Why are you asking? Did something happen?”

“Oh, right, Maggie warned me that you might not remember.”

“Maggie? Why would she…?”

“I spoke to her on the phone yesterday. I needed to talk to someone after what happened.”

“Which is?! Mom?! Can you just…?”

In all honesty, Beth would have preferred to talk to her dad about this. Her mom tended to talk around an issue rather than get to the point, while her father could give a quick but precise summary, getting to the heart of things. This time, though, her mom must have sensed Beth’s worry, as she stopped what she was doing to sit across from her.

“Well, I can only tell it from my point of view, and I don’t know if it’s the best point of view, but…”

“Mom.”

Annette nodded.

“Alright. Imagine this: we heard a car pulling up in front of the house. We thought it was just your friends dropping you off, so we didn’t bother checking, but a minute later, we heard knocking. So I went to the door, thinking you might have forgotten your keys again, but no. It was Daryl Dixon.”

“What? What was he doing here?” Beth’s heart raced, and she hoped her face wasn’t as red as it felt. 

“He brought you home, Betty.”

Beth opened her mouth in surprise, her heartbeat quickening. He came?! Daryl came to see her at the Bronze?!

“But why don’t I remember that? I don’t…”

“Well, imagine my confusion, then, when I saw Daryl Dixon carrying my little girl in his arms. You were just sleeping, but for a moment there, I had this ridiculous thought that something really bad had happened to you.”

Daryl carried her home, and she didn’t even remember it?! No, no, no. She had to remember! Did she meet him outside? She must have. Beth shook her head, trying to jog her memory, but she only managed to give herself a bigger headache. She hid her heard in her hands for a moment, before uttering:

“But did he tell you what happened?”

“Yes, of course. First, your dad showed him to your room, they put you to bed, and then…”

“Daryl was in my room?!” 

“Your dad was with him. Besides, aren’t you the one who told me he’s a nice man? Why do you sound so offended all of a sudden?”

This time, Beth was sure she blushed crimson. She wasn’t offended, not really. She just wished she could remember, wished she could have seen him laying her in her bed like that. A wave of warmth spread through her at the mere thought of his strong arms holding her up. The universe was being so cruel to her, not letting her remember. Not only did it make her anxious, but now it also fueled her disappointment. 

“I still think he’s a nice man, Mom.” How many times did she have to tell her mom before she would try and give Daryl a chance?

“Good, because apparently, your father is planning on inviting him for dinner.” Beth’s eyes widened. If she ever laughed at Ginny in Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets for making those big eyes at the sight of Harry, she wouldn’t do it again. Not after realizing she was pulling the same kind of face. Her mom either didn’t notice or just chose to ignore her daughter’s quirks. This time, Annette, uncharacteristically, continued the story without needing any prompting.

“He said he didn’t know exactly what happened, but he suspected some man you met at the Bronze put something in your drink and then tried to get you into his car.” Beth gasped and her mom squeezed her hand reassuringly. Her eyes seemed to be saying: everything’s alright now, you’re home, you’re safe, honey. But it was such a weird experience, hearing about something that happened to her when she had no memory of it. As if she wasn’t there at all. “Thank God Daryl was driving through and saw you with him. This awful man got away, though, and you are never going to that horrible place again. I told your dad it was a stupid idea to let you go in the first place. And don’t even get me started on those friends of yours, all calling you like madmen—where were they when you needed them, huh?”

Her mom launched into a rant about her friends and the Bronze, but Beth wasn’t listening. She tried again to piece together the events of the evening before. She couldn’t believe she had managed to get herself into such a dangerous situation with her friends around. Shouldn’t they have noticed someone pulling her out of the club? Were they really so busy with themselves, so preoccupied with everything else, that they didn’t pay her any mind? Beth shook her head, the notion upsetting her too much. She let her mind wander to Daryl again—to how she got to see him after all and didn’t remember. Then again, maybe it was better that she didn’t, given how she must have looked, drugged and stumbling on her feet. She just hoped she hadn’t done anything stupid.

After a long and exhausting visit to the hospital, which her parents had insisted on, Beth spent the rest of the day resting and recovering, her thoughts drifting occasionally to Daryl. He just kept saving her, like her own personal hero, and Beth couldn’t help but use it as an excuse to see him.

“I’ve been thinking,” Beth said at dinner that day. “I’d like to go to Dixon’s garage tomorrow, to thank Daryl for being there for me. I could bake him something again maybe… What do you think?” 

Of course, her mother scrunched her nose upon hearing this, but Hershel gave her that special smile of his that showed just how proud he was.

“I think that’s a lovely idea, and I could go with you, invite him for dinner next Sunday.” 

That wasn’t what she had in mind, but she didn’t want to make her Dad suspicious of her motives, so she smiled and nodded happily, pretending she liked the sound of that. Her mom didn’t pretend. She rather rudely interrupted their conversation to ask Shawn how his internet girlfriend was doing. It only went to show how much she disliked talking about Daryl Dixon since Annette wasn’t really in favor of Internet dating, always commenting on how strange it was to date someone you’ve never seen in real life. Shawn, for his part, blushed like a schoolgirl and mumbled that she was fine, which was rather adorable. Beth wondered if he’d ever bring her home. It probably wouldn’t happen soon, though, seeing as Shawn had never brought any of his girlfriends’ home and didn’t talk much about them either. Always so secretive and bashful about it. 

The next morning, after making and packing the cupcakes, Beth faced the daunting task of choosing an outfit. Some days, her wardrobe felt like a prison of outdated trends and mismatched styles, and today was one of those days. She had half a mind to throw everything out and start fresh. Why were all of her clothes looking so childish and silly all of a sudden?

With a huff of frustration, Beth wandered into Maggie’s room, hoping to discover some hidden gems among her sister’s abandoned clothes. Beth didn’t end up disappointed. She squealed with excitement when she spotted a peach dress with a deep scoop neckline that Maggie often wore on her dates. Not even one of Maggie’s boyfriends could keep his hands off her for too long when she wore it. Beth knew that for a fact. Not only because the brunette liked to overshare sexy details about her relationships but also because funnily enough everytime Beth had the misfortune of walking in on Maggie smooching a guy, her sister wore that dress. Perhaps it was some kind of magic dress that would make Beth a lucky girl too?

Yeah, right. As if you were anything but a kid to him.

Beth decided to wear the dress with a black cardigan and cowboy boots, and even though it wasn’t her thing, she decided to put on some makeup—a shimmering eyeshadow that matched the color of the dress, some mascara and a touch of lipgloss. She looked herself up and down in the mirror and smiled happily. 

It was then that Beth realized she still hadn't seen her purse.

“Mom, did you see my purse?”

Annette, who was busy grading some papers in the living room, looked up with a thoughtful expression.

“No, I don’t think I did.”

“That’s weird. I had it with me at The Bronze.”

“Oh, you probably left it in Daryl’s car then.”

It was almost surreal to hear her mother refer to something Beth did while she was with Daryl. Still, a pleasant shiver went down her spine at the thought of the biker, her crush just getting bigger and bigger with each day.

“Betty? You’re ready?” Her father’s voice came from outside, and Beth sighed. She wanted to ask Daryl what really happened last night, but with her dad around, she was pretty sure Daryl wouldn’t be too conversational. Beth really, really wanted to be able to talk to him without an audience. Wouldn’t it be fun if the magical dress could grant that wish too? Beth giggled to herself at the thought. 

“Yes, Daddy!” She grabbed the cupcakes from the kitchen and a small backpack to hold her phone.

Hershel, who had been sitting on the porch reading some book, looked up at her and smiled, his eyes suddenly full of emotion. 

“What?” Beth asked when her dad just kept looking at her with an amused, but warm glint in his eyes. 

Hershel shook his head.

“I’m always amazed to see how fast you’re all growing up,” he said, and although she was pretty sure he was referring to her, the man continued, “Like Maggie. She is already living away from home, and I have the feeling she’s going to bring someone for dinner on your mother’s birthday.”

“You think so? Why wouldn’t she tell us she’s seeing someone?”

“That’s simple. She doesn’t think I will approve of him.”

Beth snorted, and Hershel gave her a look.

“I’m sorry, Dad, but it just doesn’t sound like Maggie. She never listens to you when it comes to her boyfriends.”

“You’re right, but this one is special. She really likes this one.”

They got in the car, and Beth felt the need to roll her eyes but stopped herself. Her father sometimes liked to pretend he saw and knew way more than they thought he did. Sometimes it was true; sometimes he did, and Beth always felt astonished by how he seemed to have things figured out way before the rest of their family did. Mom always said that although she couldn’t tell what it was, every time Hershel had one of his “secretive thoughts,” it alarmed her that something was going to happen, and more often than not, it did. But there were times like this when there was no way he could possess any valuable information, what with Maggie being away most of the time.

“You can’t possibly know that.”

“Oh, I can, and I do. She’s going to call a few days before to tell us she’s bringing him to make us think it’s nothing important, but she is in love.”

Beth shook her head and rolled the window down to rest her elbow on the door.

“Well, if you’re right, I want to know how you knew.”

“The magician never tells his tricks.”

“You’re not a magician, Dad.”

“You know that every time you say stuff like this, one magician dies?”

“No. It’s when you say that fairies don’t exist that a fairy dies, and I didn’t even say that magicians didn’t exist. I just don’t think you’re one of them, Daddy.”

Hershel started laughing, and Beth smiled happily. They continued this banter for the next twenty minutes, until at one of the stoplights, her father took out fifty dollars and passed it to her.

“Here. For Uber. Keep the change. Don’t tell Mom.” Her father winked at her, and Beth laughed before asking.

“But why do I need an Uber? I’m not going anywhere else today.”

“Oh, I forgot to tell you.” Beth scrunched her eyebrows. “I’m just dropping you off. Mrs. Tran called while you were getting ready. Fluffy got himself in trouble again.”

“Oh, that’s awful. What happened this time?”

“He ran away again and got into a fight with the cat next door. A nasty one.”

“Poor Fluffy!”

Beth tried not to let it show how much the notion of being alone with Daryl affected her, some conflicting emotions getting a hold of her heart. Without her daddy around it was going to be totally different and with the whole lack of memories Beth felt even more nervous and jittery than normally. What if she did something really embarrassing and didn’t remember it? Or even worse, what if she told him she liked him? Like really, really liked him? But then again, being alone with Daryl? The thought of that almost made her squeal with happiness.

Hershel stopped the car outside the Dixon’s garage and Beth got out even though she suddenly didn’t feel as brave and ready for this conversation as she did in the morning.

No one came running to welcome her this time. The garage looked pretty abandoned and she had to fight the feeling of disappointment when no one answered her as she knocked at Daryl’s door. Not knowing what else to do, Beth tried the garage next, even though she was pretty sure there was nobody there either. As soon as she came inside though she realized that she was wrong. There were a few cars and one bike in the repair area and no one to welcome her here either, but as she entered the building she heard loud voices from behind the doors at the end of the hall. She headed in that direction.

“… kill you bitch, and he pulls his gun on Darylina!” One of the surly voices said with a loud drawl and Beth heard laughter from behind the doors.

“‘s not fuckin’ funny, Merle!”  And here he was. Just from Daryl’s tone of voice Beth could tell that he was in a rather bad mood, and for a second she hesitated. Perhaps it would be better not to disturb him?

Beth squeezed the box full of chocolate cupcakes, suddenly entirely sure that Daryl won’t appreciate the sentiment.

“Sure it is, baby bro. Should’ve seen your face! Fuckin’ priceless.” Daryl’s brother didn’t sound like a nice guy, but Beth wouldn’t say Daryl sounded like one when he was angry either. So perhaps it was better not to judge. “The poor fucker though he’s gonna die over some stupid cartoon.”

Laughter erupted again and Beth concluded that excluding Daryl and Merle there had to be at least two other men in the room. Seeing as Daryl’s friends didn’t seem like the guys Beth would want to meet, she contemplated coming back later, maybe tomorrow after school. But when she turned to leave, she heard whistling and then steps from the other side. It seemed that Beth was trapped. 

The doors opened and Beth came to an abrupt stop in front of the fairly young and attractive man in a dark brown leather jacket. He had dark blonde hair pushed up from his forehead, green eyes with the playful glint and three days’ shadow on his cheeks. In his hands the man held two six packs, so she concluded he must be at least twenty-one, but not much older than that.

“Oh, hello there.” He flashed her a flirtatious smile. “Do you need any help?”

Beth opened her mouth to answer, but suddenly the doors at the end of the hall burst open and four men came out behaving really loud.

“Oi, Ryan! If I wanted to wait that long, I’d send my old lady for that beer!” One of the men shouted not really noticing her yet, but Beth knew it was only a matter of time, so she braced herself for the unavoidable and turned around to look at them. They all looked similar in the way that they were all wearing dirty uniforms, their hair was all in the different stages of grayness and their faces hadn't seen the razor for weeks judging by the scruff.

“Shut it, Santucci. Can’t you see that Weaver got lucky today?” The other man said pointing at her and making the other men notice her too.

“Yeah, I wish, Roy. The girl’s not with me.” Ryan laughed and something in the way he’s said that made her think that it wasn’t really his wish for a girl like her to be his.

What threw Beth off the most though was the fact that Daryl wasn’t among them, and she would freak out if it wasn’t for the fact that the third man that came out was the one Maggie talked to when they visited the Dixon’s last time. Garry. He looked at her now and Beth smiled at him in response.

“Aren’t you Maggie’s sister?” Garry asked her and when she nodded shyly the other question followed: “Crushed your daddy’s car again?”

Beth blushed. What does she tell them? Is she really going to announce that she made cupcakes for Daryl and now wanted to give them to him? And maybe, possibly, if he wanted to, spend some time talking to him because it seems that she can’t stop thinking about the man? It didn’t seem like a good thing to do, especially with Merle Dixon—or at least that’s who she thought the fourth man had to be—giving her a measured look. If Beth were to be honest with herself, she would say that the older Dixon, along with the one called Santucci, was giving her the heebie-jeebies.  

“Um, no, not really.” Beth was already pretty small, but she wished she could get even smaller. Perhaps to the point that they wouldn’t be able to see her at all. And where was Zach when she needed someone to make things less awkward? “I came to see Daryl.”

There. She said it. And if she wasn’t that unsettled she would probably feel pretty proud of shocking the hell out of those guys, because for a good moment nobody said anything. They were just looking at her as if she was the seventh wonder.

Then Merle whistled.

Garry started saying something that sounded a lot like “Why’d you…” but the older Dixon didn’t let him finish.

“Darylina! Get your ass here! Someone’s here for ya!”

Oh God , Beth hoped Daryl wouldn’t be mad. Suddenly she felt even more nervous than a few seconds ago when she came face to face with those four men. The other two guys went to grab the beer, but Garry and Merle stayed watching her and she got the feeling that the first one did so just because he didn’t want to leave her at Merle’s mercy. Unfortunately, Garry’s strategy didn’t work.

“You know, sweet cheeks, you’ve got some business to my brother, why don’t ya run it through me before he gets here, huh?

“Beth?” Daryl’s voice came at just the right moment, and Beth had never felt so relieved to hear someone in her entire life. Her eyes snapped to Daryl, and she could tell he was as surprised to see her as the other men were to hear that she had come to him. Unlike the other guys, he was wearing his own clothes. The first thing she noticed was his black ripped jeans, though she doubted it was a fashion statement; she preferred to think he had ripped them accidentally and hadn’t had the heart to throw them away. He also wore a red plaid shirt with the sleeves ripped off, and, as always, his leather vest. He looked good, as always, but there was something new about him—a quality she had never seen before. It was in the way he moved and the way he looked at her. Yes, there was surprise in his gaze, but there was something else, too. Something she couldn’t quite put her finger on, yet it made her feel all tingly inside at the mere sight of him.

It was embarrassing really that she had to take a minute to calm her heartbeat and make her throat work again before speaking to him.

“Hi.” Beth took a step away from Merle and closer to Daryl and soon they were just a few feet away. Before the biker could ask she told him not quite thinking it through. “I just… I thought it would be nice to give you something to thank you for, you know, for everything basically,. So I made these. I hope you like chocolate.”

She reached out presenting him the box full of cupcakes she’s made for him, and Daryl traced the lines of her face with his eyes for a second longer, confused and startled, before looking down at the box. He tentatively took the box from her, their fingers meeting for a second or two, the contact sending a shot of energy through Beth’s body and making her shudder. Daryl’s eyes dropped to the box and then up, sliding through the curves of her body, hugged tightly by the dress, before finding her face again. Another shudder ran through Beth’s body in response to that piercing gaze, her cheeks flushing red.

“You baked for me again?” Daryl asked hesitantly. Beth smiled and nodded. She had to bite her lower lip to keep herself from laughing at his bewilderment. She was so focused on him; she didn’t even notice how silent the room became. Wasn’t aware that they were being watched either.

 “Yeah, I did. Well, actually, I was kind of hoping you’d share them with me.”

The smile Beth gave him was tentative, but also full of hope. Daryl was still looking at her like he was seeing her for the first time when Merle chose to ruin this perfect moment.

“The fuck is this? I leave for a few weeks and you what? Find yourself a fucking jailbait to screw around with?”

“Piss off, Merle. You don’t know what you’re talking about.” Daryl glared at his brother, and then, before Merle could find any insult to respond with, Daryl took Beth by the elbow and pulled her towards the room they all came from. “Come on, let’s talk somewhere else.” Beth let him do this, enjoying the skin contact far too much to complain. And anyway, she wanted out of this place just as much as he did. 

Santucci whistled, imitating Merle from before, and Roy laughed.

“Somewhere else, huh? And what do you need the privacy for, brother?” The man joked and Daryl glared at him. Santucci shoved Roy and joined the teasing with an amused glint in his eyes. 

“Yeah, wonder what he’s gonna be doing with that pretty Lolita.”

Beth blushed heavily, but Daryl just huffed in annoyance. They made it out of the main area and out of sight of the other guys. Daryl opened the door to the small room she was standing in front of before she chickened out and shoved her inside with a little less delicacy than he normally treated her with.

“I hear any weird sounds coming from there I’m going in. You hear me, Darylina?”

Beth was already looking around the small room, and Daryl was closing the door when his older brother chose to speak again. She could see the grimace crossing Daryl’s face just before he retorted:

“Screw you, Merle!”

Daryl shot the door closed with a loud bang, and Beth blushed yet again. She was pretty sure that Daryl’s skin wasn’t that heated before either. He stepped away from the door and put the box full of cupcakes on the desk. 

“Sorry about that. They’re jackasses.” Daryl whispered hoarsely, avoiding her eyes. She watched him put his thumb to his mouth for a second before changing his mind and reaching for the pack of cigarettes resting in his vest’s pocket. Nervous. Just like her. Perhaps even more than her.

Daryl lit up the cigarette and then took the first puff, looking at everything but her. He walked away from the desk, putting a greater distance between them.

“It’s fine,” Beth assured him and added in an afterthought. “I’m sorry if I embarrassed you by showing up like this.”

She rested her hands on the desk leaning on it with her backside while Daryl sat down in a big old tapestry chair that stood as far away from the desk as you could get in the small room like this. He still wasn’t meeting her eyes and Beth wondered if it had something to do with the way others reacted to her or rather with the fact that he had to drag her intoxicated ass back home not that long ago. When the only response she got was a little murmur that sounded a bit like ‘s alright’ Beth tried again.

“I don’t remember what exactly happened on Friday. Just that I felt bad, and went outside to get some fresh air, and then I just… woke up back home.” Watching Daryl breathe the smoke from his cigarette, inhaling slowly and exhaling in a lazy drift, felt intoxicating in a way that was nothing like the haze of the Friday night. Tonight, there was a charge in the air, and for some reason, his lips held her gaze even more than usual. Maybe it was the gritty talk from his friends, or maybe the drug hadn’t quite left her system, but suddenly, she could picture Daryl stubbing out that cigarette, striding over to her, and pressing his mouth to hers, rough and unrestrained. She imagined him pushing her harder against the edge of the desk, his hands sneaking under her knees and opening her legs up for him to step in between them. Beth had to squeeze her tights together, the idea of him manhandling her stirring something deep within her. She imagined him taking her apart piece by piece, kissing her down her neck, his hands exploring her body, while Merle and the rest of the guys in the next room heard every sound they made.

Beth wasn’t sure how long she was sitting there, lost in that imaginary world where he wanted her the same way she wanted him. But it must have been long enough to alarm Daryl. When she finally raised her head, she found Daryl’s blues fixed on her, watching her with that raw glint that had excited her before—and now, alone together, it made that funny feeling low in her stomach return with such strength that she shuddered. For one brief, charged moment, staring at each other from opposite sides of the room, she was sure he was going to do it. That he was going to turn her fantasy from a minute before into reality, stride over and close the distance, pin her to the desk, his mouth rough and wanting on hers. But then Daryl looked down again, and just like that, the feeling was gone. 

She swallowed audibly, willing herself to behave.

“My parents told me that you brought me home. They said you saved me from being taken by someone.” Beth cleared her throat suddenly feeling very silly. “I just, I don’t know how I could do this even after you scared me so much the other morning. God, I’m so stupid.”

“Stop.” His voice was hoarse and silent but the vibrations that she felt inside because of it weren’t silent at all. In fact Beth felt like her body was screaming at her, an urgent, unspoken message, leaving her breathless and unsure, as if it knew something she didn’t. “Ain’t stupid. You just trust people too much. Need to be more careful, ‘s all.”

Beth snorted, and that sure got his attention. Their eyes met for another second or two before Daryl went back to staring at his shoes and eating his thumb. Beth has never felt so awkward sitting in a room with him, and all she wanted to do was to make him talk to her. However, it couldn’t be that simple. Not with her not wanting to come off as too pushy or invested, and not with Daryl being as secretive as he was.

“Even when I’m trying to be careful someone manages to put something in my drink. Admit it, I’m just hopeless.” Beth said instead, trying to ignore his behavior.

“You’re young. Plenty of time to get better at it.”

“So what, you think I’m gonna be tough like you some day?” Daryl looked up again and Beth took that opportunity to send him a sweet smile. She held her breath, seeing his eyes drop lower, below her collarbones again for just a second, before leaving her completely. A shiver of warmth spread through her and she wondered if, in that moment, he saw her exactly as she hoped he did.

“You don’t wanna be like me.” Came a bitter response and Beth bit her lip watching Daryl openly as he avoided looking at her again. 

Perhaps she interpreted it in the wrong way entirely. Her mother could be actually right when she said that Daryl was just driving through, on his way to somewhere else, not to meet up with her. And if Daryl didn’t come to see her after all then he probably didn’t want to see her now. Nothing has changed since he said that he had better things to do than hanging out with high school girls. That realization stunk, but there was no way she could pretend that she didn’t notice how utterly miserable he was, sitting there avoiding looking at her at all cost as if she had some disease that Daryl could catch by eye contact. 

“So,” Beth started again, reading herself to ask the question she actually came here to ask. “Did my drunk ass annoy the hell out of you?” 

It wasn’t exactly what Beth wanted to know, but she figured it was close enough. However, Daryl didn’t even glance at her while answering her question, and it wasn’t even a legit answer, more like a huff. A ‘nah’ of some sorts. 

“Daryl, did something happen?” Beth asked, her eyebrows furrowing and a worried wrinkle appearing between them. “Did I do something?”

Daryl shook his head pressing his lips tightly together and somehow it was enough for her to know that he wasn’t telling her something.

“Daryl, please. I don’t remember anything, so if I did…”

“It don’t matter.” The man put his thumb to his mouth before looking up at her. “You were drugged.”

This time Daryl quickly averted his eyes from her, as if ashamed,  and Beth felt the urge to stride over to him and make him keep his head up.

“It matters to me.” Daryl shook his head again, still not looking up, and she added with frustrated huff: “Don’t you think I deserve to know?”

“You didn’t do nothing wrong. Was just actin’ the way all drugged people do. Nothin’ to it.”

Beth sighed.

She wanted to prod, to make Daryl talk to her, but she wasn’t brave enough to do so. It didn’t seem like he was going to share anything with her either way, and after all these meetings with him, Beth was well aware of how stubborn he could be. So, Beth smiled sadly and said:

“Alright. I just wanted to thank you for saving me again and dragging my stupid ass back home, I don’t know what I’d do without you. That's all really, so I’ll just call for an uber and get out of your hair.” Silence answered her and Beth started rummaging through her backpack, when she realized that, in fact, there was something else she wanted from him. “Oh, right. I meant to ask you. Didn’t I leave my purse in your car yesterday? I couldn’t find it.”

Daryl shook his head again but to her utter relief it wasn’t his only reaction.

“You must have left it in that bastard’s car.”

An unpleasant grimace appeared on his face along with those words.

“What? But my mom told me I didn’t get in the car with him? Did I?”

Daryl finally glanced at her.

“Were one leg in when I got there.”

“Oh. Wow. I must be really stupid.”

“Nah. You didn’t know what were you doin’ ”  His blue eyes stayed on her while he was reassuring her about it and something in the way he looked at her then didn’t feel right. Beth couldn’t pinpoint what exactly felt wrong about that though. “’s not your fault.”

As he fell silent again Beth realized that she was almost sure that he was going to follow it up with “It’s all my fault.” If anyone asked her though she wouldn’t be able to say where that weird thought came from.

Daryl stood up then and Beth looked back to her phone. Right. She was going to order an Uber…

“Stop.”

“What?” Beth looked up at the man who finally neared the space between them. Her heartbeat was picking up its pace with every step he took in her direction, even though she was pretty sure he wasn’t going to touch her. Not the way she wanted at least.

Daryl gestured at the phone with his chin.

“This.” He stopped right next to her and although he still wasn’t quite meeting her eyes it felt more normal. “I can give you a ride.”

She watched him, holding her breath, while he reached for the box of cupcakes she had brought for him. He stood close—perhaps closer than he needed to—and when Beth finally let go of her breath and exhaled, she caught that familiar scent of him:  his cologne, a mix of sandalwood and eucalyptus with faded leather and motor oil, and beneath it something distinctly him, stirring feelings inside her that she fought to bury in the last few months. 

“Oh. I don’t want to trouble…”

“It ain’t no trouble, girl.” Daryl left her no space for arguing and although Beth was happy to spend more time with him, it still upset her to see how withdrawn and quiet he was on that day. It felt more like he found it his responsibility to get her back home by himself than something he really wanted to do, and she didn’t like that at all.

“Alright.” She whispered back, smiling at him shyly, which made him turn his head away from her yet again. Daryl offered her one of the cupcakes, his fingers brushing against hers when she reached out for it. He held her gaze for a moment before stepping back and away from her again. Whatever it was with him, Daryl didn’t share it with her that day. They ate one cupcake each, and then the man gave her a silent, awkward ride back home, ceasing to exist for another few days, leaving Beth wanting.

Chapter 12: A redneck asshole with an even bigger asshole for a brother

Summary:

After their last meeting, Beth and Daryl are both miserable and struggling with their feelings. Will they find a way to confront their emotions and reconnect, or will their unresolved tension drive them further apart?

Notes:

Thank you for all the lovely comments under the last chapter!
I didn't have the time to write any of you back, but I promise every single one of your little inputs makes me so happy <3 I'm so glad this story found so many readers <3

Daryl thought getting Beth back home and out of his sight would make breathing easy again, but as he watched Beth walking up to her door, something akin to disappointment twisted in his gut, and he realized it solved nothing. He quickly dropped his gaze from her when she turned around to send him one last smile before disappearing inside. She was so impossibly bright, so warm and kind. Perhaps if Daryl had known how much it was going to blindside him, he would’ve never stopped to help her in those woods, back when he was looking for Sophia. He wouldn’t have been the man he was if he hadn’t, though, and there was nothing to be done about it now, so Daryl just sighed heavily and made himself move. Leave the girl be.

Beth might have been out of his sight for the rest of that day, but she definitely wasn’t out of his mind. Couldn’t have been. Not when the first thing Daryl heard upon his return to the garage was Zach’s whining.

“You should’ve worn a bag over your head, Ryan! Damn it! Now that Beth saw you, she’ll never look at me again…”

Merle snorted in response, his eyes landing on Daryl as he came into the main room, where the guys sat, drinking their beers. They had moved things around when Daryl was away, creating a space for playing cards, and were now all gathered at the makeshift pallet table, a game of poker already in full swing.

“I wouldn't worry about Ryan if I were ya, boy,” Merle drawled, his mouth forming a mean smile around his cigarette as he drew another card nonchalantly and laid it on the table for everyone to see. Both Roy and Santucci roared with laughter upon hearing this, and Daryl pulled a face at his brother, glaring at him for good measure as well. Not that it would be enough to keep Merle from doing what Merle did best: stirring shit.

“Have you seen him?! Every time a nice sweet girl comes in here, they take one look at Ryan, and it’s like I don’t exist,” Zach babbled, apparently not in on the joke. “Hell, I can’t believe she was here. I just keep missing her! It’s like the universe hates me, guys!”

He dropped his head to the table with a loud thud, the whole thing shaking from the impact and making the other bikers cuss at the boy. Daryl watched the table tilt for a moment before rolling his eyes and turning away from the ruckus. The girl was almost kidnapped—something Daryl informed Zach of when he asked after her the morning after—but the boy didn’t seem too fazed by that anymore, only caring about getting in her pants, apparently. Perhaps it wasn’t as different from Zach’s usual antics as Daryl had first thought after all. For all his talk about her talent and sweetness, he didn’t seem too interested in how she was doing. Only when he thought about it did Daryl realize that he hadn’t asked her how she was feeling either, too busy guilt-tripping himself about as much as looking at her, not to mention actually talking.

She’d be fine, he told himself now, trying and failing to squash his worry. Rick had told him the attempted kidnapping didn’t match their killer’s modus operandi, that it was probably entirely unrelated, but it didn’t sit right with Daryl. Was it really possible that Beth Greene simply had a knack for getting herself in dangerous situations? Rick gave him that taxing look of his when Daryl questioned it, then raised his eyebrows at Daryl and asked with that annoying little smirk of his, “I don’t know; you tell me. I’m not the one who keeps bumping into her on the streets.” Daryl only glared at him in response, saying he didn’t have time for his games, but internally he had to admit that Rick was right.

After all these months of watching her, Daryl was pretty sure he knew the answer to that question. After all, the girl went with him to his house in the middle of the night once, then let him, covered from head to toe in blood, into the house she was staying in with just a few kids. And to top it all, she kept coming to him, visiting him at the garage with her baked goods. Yeah, Beth Greene not only kept finding herself in dangerous situations; she seemed to be seeking them too. Seeking him most of the time, it seemed.

Daryl went to grab himself a beer and moved one of the two remaining barrels in the direction of the table to join his friends for their monthly Sunday game of poker. The table was stabilized again by the time he got there, but the subject of Zach’s infatuation with Beth Greene didn’t slip their minds, along with the cards that Zach was now fishing from the ground.

“First Ryan, then the universe. Mate, it seems to me like you’re the problem,” Roy chipped in, taking the cards from Zach and shuffling them, and Garry grunted in approval.

“Don’t forget his mom. I had to listen to him whining about her coming to dinner on the night of his date with that girl the whole day yesterday.”

“Jesus, just be a man,” started Santucci before taking a huge swig of his beer and burping loudly. “Next time you see her, just shove that tongue of yours in her mouth and be done with it.”

Daryl clenched his teeth, annoyed, and unclenched them just as quickly when he caught Merle watching him with a smirk on his face.

“We playin’, or y’all gonna keep gossipin’ like a bunch of schoolgirls?” Daryl asked, trying to divert their attention from Beth, anger seeping into his voice unbidden. He made a mistake, he realized too late, seeing Merle smile even more widely.

“Speaking of schoolgirls, how was your lil’ joyride, brother?” Daryl shrugged, then pretended to be busy, moving the poker chips Roy bestowed upon him closer to himself, seemingly counting them. Just drop the subject, Merle. “I’m sure our Romeo here would love to know if his birdie asked for him. Don’t ya, boy?”

Merle’s hand went down on Zach’s shoulder, and the boy twitched under his touch, clearly uncomfortable. He’d never sit next to Merle willingly, usually choosing spots next to Daryl or Ryan, but he was trying to talk Merle into letting him be a part of Feral Angels. Daryl could bet that Merle made him sit there on purpose to bask in his nerves. Daryl would pity him if Zach’s latest romantic inclinations didn’t rattle his nerves so much.

“Ah, sure, I do; you know that. I already asked you guys, like, five times, but you just keep laughing at me.” Daryl rolled his eyes when four of the guys burst into laughter, the only other person not finding it funny being Jess, who wasn’t there when Beth came. Daryl had hoped by the time he came back from getting Beth back to her house, they would be done with the teasing. It wasn’t such a big deal: they all knew he saved her from being taken on Friday, what with Rick coming to him to get his testimony on Saturday. Was it really so out of left field that she’d come to thank him for it? Daryl sighed, knowing that he was just kidding himself. He was just as bewildered by her coming to him the first time, and it wasn’t like his friends knew about all the other meetings. It was enough that Carol knew. He didn’t need anybody else on his case.

“Any idea what’s gotten into them?” his uncle whispered to him, and Daryl shrugged again, his eyes glued to the table. Thankfully, a moment later Jess put a stop to the teasing. “Come on now, I didn’t come here just to look at your ugly mugs. Are we playing or what?”

The game started after that, as nobody felt like arguing with the boss, and Daryl willed himself to relax. 

He settled into his seat, trying to focus on his hand of cards rather than the lingering thoughts of Beth that tugged at his mind. Every so often, a snippet of conversation drifted past him, the laughter and the smack-talk blending into a comforting hum. But his attention kept slipping, his mind tugged back to their conversation in the office—the way she was leaning against the table, so unsure, yet still so impossibly warm and kind. He thought it would be better for her not to remember that she put her hands on him, but he could barely stand her now, knowing that he didn’t deserve any of her smiles.

It wasn’t like him to dwell on anyone, especially not on someone so out of place in his world. And yet, here he was, yet again thinking about Beth Greene. Daryl played his hand, listening to the banter around him, but each play felt a little heavier, every joke a little quieter in his ears. He glanced around the table, realizing he wasn’t the only one aware of his distracted state; Merle’s smirk was making him feel more jittery than Rick’s questions and Carol’s advice ever did.

They finished the round, and Daryl bolted from his seat, uncharacteristically, perhaps, volunteering to get everyone their beers from the fridge. He thought that would grant him at least a few minutes of peace, away from Merle’s stupid face. No such luck.

“Tell you what, lil’ bro, I’ll give ya a hand.”

Merle trailed behind him, completely unbothered by the grimace that appeared on Daryl’s face when he did. The moment they were out of everyone’s earshot, Merle went on the offensive.

“So,” Merle started. Daryl could feel his eyes on his back, that piercing, chilling gaze of his that always threw Daryl off balance. “You got a thing for little girls now?”

Daryl straightened up from where he was taking the beers out of a little office fridge, his eyes only briefly landing on Merle.

“Don't be stupid,” was the only response he managed, his brother’s words making him shiver with disgust. The suggestion was enough to make him feel like a piece of shit again. Merle didn’t seem disheartened by this response, though, nor did he seem to care much for how inappropriate the subject was.

“Come on, baby bro, you can tell dear ol’ Merle. I ain’t gonna rat you out to the police,” he said, half-joking, half-not.

Daryl turned around to glare at him.

“She is eighteen, jackass. And I don’t…” His throat closed off on the words, but he pushed them through anyway. “Don’t have a thing for her.”

Merle tutted at him.

“Wanna fool someone? You might want to be a lil’ less quick on claimin’ she’s legal.”

“Screw you, Merle," Daryl gritted out, something unpleasant uncoiling in his guts.

His brother snorted.

“Ain’t me you wanna screw,” he sing-sang and Daryl had to hold back a groan.

He didn't.

“Shut up.”

Daryl went back to pulling beers out of the fridge, handing them to Merle, who kept putting them on the counter, on which he was leaning, his arms crossed, as he was scrutinizing Daryl silently. It never meant anything good when Merle was acting all contemplative like that. 

“Ah, so you decided you’re just gonna sulk about it instead of fucking her like she clearly wants ya to, huh?” Merle uttered after a moment, mean and playful at the same time, and Daryl simply lost it.

“I said shut up!” Daryl pushed Merle into the wall by the collar of his shirt, but the moment his brother laughed derisively, throwing his hands up, Daryl deflated. He let go of Merle, his voice catching on a dangerously high note as he hissed through clenched teeth: “She’s eighteen, asshole.”

“Yeah, I know, you already told me she ain’t a kid, brother. No need to repeat yerself.”

“No, I mean, she’s just eighteen. Still in fucking high school. She doesn’t want this shit, and I ain’t gonna…” Daryl’s voice broke from tension, his shoulders sagging a little, ashamed. Why would Merle even say all that shit? Beth was just being kind, coming here, thanking him. She had no idea. “Look, whatever you think you saw, it was your wild fucking imagination. Alright?”

“Sure, alright. Whatever you say, baby bro.”

Sure, alright. Merle’s wild imagination. Nothing more to it.

The big, disgusting thing? That flicker of attraction he felt for her when she’d stood in front of him, wrapped in that small towel at Rick’s place—so close he could smell her flowery shampoo? That was nothing but adrenaline, a reflex from dealing with the shooting. He was just feeling a little unhinged, that’s all.

And after that? The Founders’ Gala? Sure, she looked nice. So did Carol, and his feelings for her were purely platonic. So yes, he registered, purely platonically, that Beth looked good—walked, smiled, smelled, even breathed nicely. Nothing more to it.

And he definitely didn’t struggle to keep his eyes off her in that dress she wore to the garage today. Sitting across the room, he hadn’t even once thought she wore it to taunt him, to provoke something they’d both regret. No, only a creep would think that. And Daryl wasn’t a creep. If she’d dressed that way for any reason beyond her own pleasure, it was probably hoping to catch Zach’s eye—the boy she was waiting for at the Bronze, the boy she mistook him for on Friday. She’d kissed him, sure, but she thought he was Zach. It was the only explanation, and there was nothing more to it.

For the next few days, Daryl kept repeating those bits like a sort of mantra every time his mind betrayed him by bringing up Beth Greene. And to his utter displeasure, it happened a lot.

It was getting more and more plausible though, the more he replayed these words in his head, and after four days, Daryl was close to convincing himself they were all true. A few more days and he’d be able to look himself in the eye in the mirror, he thought. He hadn’t seen Beth, Zach was too busy running errands for Merle to talk his ears off about the girl, and even Merle seemed to get the message and stopped bothering him on the subject. All was going well.

Then, on Thursday, it all went to shit.

*

Thursday’s practice was exceptionally exhausting, and Beth wanted nothing more than to get into her daddy’s truck and go home. Hershel let her take it since he got ill and wasn’t going anywhere that day, and Mom and Shawn didn’t need it either.

Beth entered the locker room with the other cheerleaders, trying not to listen to one of them as she recalled her night with Jimmy, who had taken her to the drive-in theater and then made out with her for the whole movie. It seemed that all the cheating and chlamydia rumors couldn’t keep girls away from Jimmy for too long. Kim was talking and giggling so loudly you could probably hear her from the hallway, which was surprising; Beth would think that one would want to keep her voice down when talking about sex.

“Yeah, but listen, there’s more! After the shower, I’m going back to my room, and guess who’s waitin’ for me by my window?”

“No way!”

“Yeah. He climbed it to finish what we started in the car.” The giggling erupted again, and Beth rolled her eyes. Kim kept talking. “Of course, I didn’t want to do anything. I told him, ‘No way, Jimmy. My parents are sleeping just across the hallway, alright.’ But do you think he cared? Oh no, he just started undressing me without a care in the world!”

“One may think that after a few weeks she’ll actually get tired of the bragging,” Amy murmured to Lilly and Beth. “I mean, he did cheat on her with a few other girls, so…”

Lilly snorted.

“Her? If she ever stops talking about herself, it’ll be the end of the world,” Lilly whispered back.

Beth just shook her head in response and opened her locker. The three girls took their bags out of their lockers and started undressing while Kim continued:

“I was so into it I didn’t even realize we were, like, doing it for fifteen minutes. Imagine! Fifteen minutes!”

“Ugh, you’re so lucky, girl! For Andrew, it’s like five minutes and he’s done, and going down on you after? Forget it,” Emily spoke then, her voice hushed and cheeks red.

Kim shrugged.

“Then dump his ass. For Jimmy, it worked miracles. I dumped him, and now that we’re back together, he’s all attentive like that. There’s no jumping right into BJs anymore. Well, maybe sometimes…but you know, it’s all worth it if he’s gonna stick his tongue in me after.”

The laughter erupted again, and one of the girls shouted:

“You’re wild!”—making the girl even more proud of herself while both Beth and Lilly tried not to giggle too much.

“So worth it!” Lilly mimicked Kim mockingly, and Amy followed with, “So wild!” while putting her hands to her chest and making faces. When Beth sniggered, though, Kim spoke again, this time with much more venom.

“Oh, look at that. Somebody’s jealous! Missin’ your ex yet, Bethy?”

Beth grimaced, turning around to face her classmate.

“No. I’m not. Couldn’t care less about what you do with Jimmy.”

“Is that so? Then why are you mocking me, Dixon whore?”

Beth snorted. It wasn’t actually her that was mocking Kim, but Beth didn’t think she would listen if she tried arguing about it.

“It’s just that nobody wants to listen to your sex stories anymore, Kim.”

“Oh, and by nobody, you mean you, right, Bethy? You just can’t stand it, can you? That everyone listens to me now, huh? That you’re not as special as you thought without Jimmy and all the popularity he got you.”

Yeah, everyone will listen to you for a few more weeks before Jimmy goes and finds himself a new girl to screw around, Beth thought and blushed at how mean she sounded in her own head. She didn’t have the guts to say any of that out loud.

“You know, Kimmy, having sex is not the biggest accomplishment one can have. Beth doesn’t need it to be cool,” Lilly quipped, sending the brunette a mocking smile.

“Did I ask your opinion?” Lilly opened her mouth to answer, but Kim didn’t wait for it. “Face it, Bethy, Jimmy is mine. He’s got a real woman now. Not some silly kid who has no idea how to please a man. I bet even Dixon didn’t want you, and I can only imagine how low his standards may be.”

Beth wished it didn’t ring so true. The quip about standards was disgusting and uncalled for, but the fact that Daryl didn’t want her still stood. Seeing him on Sunday only confirmed it. She was wearing Maggie’s magical dress, and Daryl didn’t even want to look at her, only glancing once or twice in her direction. It was enough to send her reeling, but it was nowhere near what she wanted to pull from him with that outfit.

“Wow, that one was good, Kay,” one of the girls said, laughing, and the brunette smiled proudly.

“Come on, Beth. We don’t have to listen to it.” Lilly took her by the hand and pulled her out of the locker room, barely giving her time to grab her stuff from the bench. They walked through the dark hallway in the direction of the school's parking lot together with Amy, and while her best friends kept insulting Kim, Jimmy, and all the other girls who tried getting with the boy, Beth couldn’t really focus on anything but that last sentence.

“I don’t get it. Why would she bring Daryl into it?”

Lilly stopped and sighed.

“That’s exactly why, Beth.” Beth sent her best friend a questioning look, and Lilly rolled her eyes. “You keep calling him by first name like he’s some friend of yours, and every time someone says something about him, you’re telling them to shut up because they have no idea what they’re talking about.”

“Yeah, and to top it all, last week? You really think nobody saw you flirting with him at the Gala?” Amy quipped in, and Beth blushed heavily.

“Wasn’t flirting,” she argued weakly.

Lilly and Amy both snorted.

“Yeah, right. I go fixing Dixon’s tie every now and then, too. Nothing weird about it.” Lilly mocked her, and Beth felt the sudden need for the floor to open and swallow her whole. It wasn’t the first time they’d mentioned the Friday night events. In fact, Beth had spent the whole evening on Saturday trying to get her best friends to back off. Lilly and Amy had had enough of the secretiveness and weird behavior and called her on it by phone. It wasn’t so much about Daryl back then, though, and more about her sneaking out of places they went to together and not telling them anything.

“Look. I guess at the beginning we didn’t mention it because we thought it was some kind of weird…play at making Jimmy jealous,” Lilly said with a grimace, and Amy nodded.

“Yeah, you know, with Dixon helping you out, going to Jimmy with you and scaring him good. But you clearly don’t care about Jimmy anymore,” Amy supplied, although she didn’t sound quite as judgy about it as Lilly did.

“Like, it’s been months, Beth,” Lilly whined unhappily. “Don’t you think it’s time to stop this charade? You just give ammunition to bitches like Kim.”

Beth watched her best friends warily for a long moment. If she ever thought about spilling out the truth about Daryl, this here was the right moment to do so. Perhaps it wouldn’t be too wise to do it at school, but they were the only ones there, and the corridor was so silent they would probably hear if someone was coming. Lilly gave her the best opportunity to come clean about it, too. It would be so easy to just say, “But I do know him. I’m sorry I’ve never told you, but I have the biggest crush on him and I actually spent the night snuggling with him and yeah, maybe I did flirt with him at the Gala…” 

It seemed like a good idea, too, to let go of this secret. Of the secret she kept out of her own will. She wasn’t even sure why. They were her friends after all, she should be able to tell them about her crush.

Perhaps Lilly and Amy would understand that it wasn’t just a crush, either. That somehow, throughout all those meetings and all of those months of pining after him, Beth started to really care for him. That she didn’t just want to kiss him. She wanted to get to know him, like really know him—closely, intimately, passionately.

Beth was still pondering this when her phone came to life in her bag, blaring her ringtone. Beth started rummaging through her stuff while Lilly and Amy stood silently in front of her, still very much annoyed with her.

Beth finally found the phone and looked at the screen, expecting it to be her mom or dad. She stopped dead in her tracks at the sight of a completely different name.

Daryl.

“What? What is it? Why aren’t you answering?” Lilly moved a little closer, probably to see who it was, but Beth was quicker. She stepped back and raised the phone to her ear, answering it without a second thought.

“Yeah?”

Beth heard his breathing before she heard anything else, and in any other circumstances, it would be downright terrifying—but this was Daryl. If her heart was pounding faster than usual, it wasn’t because of fear.

"Beth? S' that you?" His voice sounded strained and hushed, with a slight slur that made it seem suspicious.

"Shouldn’t you know that? You’re the one who called me," Beth replied, glancing at Lilly and Amy. They were furrowing their eyebrows at her—not a good sign. Beth wasn’t going to risk him hanging up, though. "I didn’t even know we had each other’s numbers."

She adjusted the bag on her shoulder and started walking toward the school’s entrance, trying not to think about Lilly and Amy walking beside her, listening to every word. She was pretty sure that after this call, keeping Daryl a secret wouldn’t be an option. She’d have to say something.

"Yeah, I gave it to you on Friday. Jus’ in case you needed a ride."

Beth smiled a little, unable to stop herself from saying, "Do you need a ride? Is that why you’re calling?"

On the other line, Beth could hear the kind of noise you’d expect in a public place—loud chatter, shouting, laughter, and shattering glass. It sounded a lot like a pub. That would explain his indistinct tone and why he was calling her. Beth doubted he’d do so if he wasn’t just a bit drunk.

"Nah. ’m fine. I just... Hey! Watch where you’re goin’, fucker!" Daryl's shout was so loud that Beth had to pull the phone back. It grew even louder as another guy joined in. Beth glanced at Lilly and Amy again as they exited the building, the street noise drowning out Daryl’s gruff voice. At least, that’s what Beth assumed, as her friends still looked more confused than shocked by her conversation.

"Sorry, guys. This might take a while. See you tomorrow?" She held her phone away, quickly kissing Lilly and then Amy on the cheek, ignoring their questioning looks.

"Yeah, see ya."

She put the phone back to her ear and quickened her pace, heading straight for the car.

"You still there?"

"Yeah, sorry ’bout that. The fucker didn’t know who he’s talkin’ to. Had to remind 'im. This shithole’s full ’f assholes."

Beth got in the truck and sighed, finally able to talk without worrying someone might overhear.

"Daryl, are you drunk?"

"Little bit."

"Why?"

"What d'you mean why? I’m an adult, for fuck’s sake. Can get drunk whenever I fucking want, girlie!"

"Then why are you calling me?" She was answered only by pub noise. "Daryl?"

"Stop doin’ that."

"Doing what?"

It took him a moment to respond, and when he did, Beth wished she hadn’t heard it.

"Don’t go bakin' no more stupid cookies for me, an’ don’t come to my work all dressed up like some... bitch on heat." He spat out the last words as though they burned, and Beth’s heart jumped. So, he did notice the dress. "We ain’t friends, alright? Know what, just delete this number, yeah?"

"Daryl, I don’t understand. Why are you..."

The shouting on his end grew louder, then silence.

"Daryl?"

She looked at the screen only to see that the call had ended. Beth tried calling him back three times, but he didn’t answer. Finally, she huffed a frustrated sigh and started the car. 

Why he decided to tell her all that when she hadn’t tried contacting him in the last few days, she didn’t know, but it hurt to hear it anyway. Especially after the argument with Kim and after what Lilly and Amy told her about her “pretending to know Daryl.” Perhaps her friends were right after all. Perhaps she had no idea who Daryl Dixon was. Perhaps she should just stop obsessing about him. If only it was that simple.

Beth’s phone started ringing again, and Beth had never picked it up so fast.

“Bethy? Are you still at school?”

The blond girl sighed with disappointment.

“No, Mom. I’m driving back. Anything important?”

“Could you just pick some materials up from Amy’s mom for me on your way? We’re working on the church play together, and I need it for the costumes. I completely forgot about them when I was in the city today.”

The “funny” thing was that Amy’s house wasn’t on Beth’s way at all. In fact, she had to turn around and go the other way, but Beth knew better than to argue that case with her mom. Instead, she agreed and did just that. Trying not to think about Daryl on her way there was a hardship, but she somehow managed to forget about their short conversation while she was at Amy’s. Neither the tea nor the pie made Beth feel better, though. Even Amy noticed her sore mood and tried to get her to talk when her mom left them alone in the living room. The tiring practice and fight with Kim came in handy for this, as Beth didn’t even have enough strength to think of a believable lie. Amy didn’t quite believe her, though. She kept asking about her secretive call, and Beth had to promise her that she’d tell them both what was going on the next day.

It took around an hour for her to get out of Amy’s house and back behind the wheel, and if right after cheerleading practice she’d dreamed of being home, now she was dying to get there.

It was sometime around eight when Beth found herself driving through the city center. This part of the city was noisy even in the middle of the week—college students chilling out with friends and beers before exams, others relaxing after a hard day at work or looking for someone to talk to, dance with, or take home…

Beth heard some shouting and laughing on the right but only glanced in that direction before focusing on the road ahead again. Green light. Another shout, angrier this time, came from her left. Beth turned to the noise, finding a man and a woman stumbling through the street, shouting at each other, clearly drunk.

The man came out of nowhere. Beth hit the brakes, but he stumbled onto the car anyway. She felt her heart go up her throat, and for a second, she was convinced she’d just killed someone, but the victim didn’t fall down. Instead, he hit the car’s hood and, without so much as glancing at her, half-shouted, half-mumbled, “Wanna kill someone?! Fucking bitch!”

It was the second time Daryl Dixon called Beth Greene a “bitch” on this day. This time, though, she didn’t think he realized who he was talking to, as right after saying that, the man swayed to his left and away, getting off the street. The honking made her move again. With her heart still in her throat, Beth parked on the street across from the one Daryl went into and got out of the car. She was on the verge of panicking as she ran across the street to turn into the corner she’d seen him pass just a moment ago. Luckily for her, Daryl had just managed to get on the bike and was clumsily trying to get the engine working.

“Hey!” Beth shouted, not only to turn his attention away from starting the bike but also because, at this point, she was angrier with him than she’d ever been with anyone else, blood rushing in her ears. “You jackass!”

Not only was he putting himself in danger by getting drunk to the point he couldn’t stand straight, but he was also stupid enough to get on a motorcycle. What was wrong with him?!

“Beth? The hell you doin’ here?!” The man swung dangerously to one side, coming close to falling off the bike, but his gaze on her was sharp and clear.

“I’m chasing your dumb ass! What do you think you’re doing?! You wanna get yourself killed?!”

She stopped right in front of him, breathing heavily, partly because of the running and partly because of the fury boiling in her veins.

“So what if I do, huh? Not your fucking business, princess!”

The man dropped his gaze down to the bike again. His hands were shaking, and his forehead was bleeding, either from hitting the truck or from some fight he had gotten into earlier. He had blood on his knuckles, and Beth was pretty sure that if she looked for it, she’d find a few other injuries that Daryl had “accidentally” inflicted on himself that very day. Daryl still tried starting the motorcycle, though, so Beth stood right in front of it and grabbed the steering wheel.

“Come on, Daryl. You’re in no state to drive. Get off the bike.” Beth tried calming her voice down, thinking that perhaps shouting was not a good strategy with a drunk man. As it turned out, though, Daryl was not going to listen to reason—no matter how calmly she tried to convince him.

“Like hell I am, girlie! Hands off my bike!”

Daryl swatted her hands away, but she grabbed onto the bike again, getting even more annoyed with him.

“Look, I don’t know what made you so pissed off, but I’m not letting you drive, alright?! Let me take you home! It’ll be safer for everyone!”

Daryl snorted. His blue eyes pierced right through her.

“Safer,” he spat out, then hissed at her. “You know what would be safer? If you’d just fuck off! Or do you want me to fuck your pretty face up?!”

He stood up, looking straight into her eyes, and Beth jerked a little under his icy stare. She didn’t let him scare her off, though. That was what Daryl wanted: to make her go away, to leave him be.

“We both know you wouldn’t do that! So why don’t you stop trying to intimidate me and just do what I’m telling you to?!”

“I wouldn’t?! Did you forget who you’re talkin’ to, sweetheart?! Ain’t a good man, alright? Just some redneck asshole with an even bigger asshole for a brother! And everyone in this city knows this! Why can’t ya just get that into your thick skull and back off, huh?!”

“I just won’t, okay?! You met me wandering alone in the middle of the night and took me to your place! You let me sleep in your bed, eat your food! Hell, I was naked in front of you, and you didn't as much as open your eyes! And just a few days ago? You actually saved my life! How can you say you’re not a good man?!”

Daryl was getting angrier with every single sentence she threw at him. The good thing was that it made him move, to get off the bike and get into her face instead. The man was breathing heavily, his nostrils flaring in anger.

“So you think you know me, huh? You think just ‘cause I didn’t fuck you then I ain’t gonna screw you over when I see it fit?!”

“Yeah, that’s exactly what I think! You are a good man, Daryl Dixon! You’re just too scared to admit it!”

In her peripheral vision, Beth saw a few of the passersby turning their heads around to watch them argue. She just hoped none of them knew her family well enough to inform her parents how she was spending her evenings.

“I ain’t afraid of nothin’! The things I’ve done… You know nothing! I shouldn’t even be talking to ya! You… it ain’t right. Why don’t you get it?!”

The man shouted in her face, gesticulating widely, and then passed by her, walking in the direction they both came from. Beth was not going to let him disappear again, though.

“You want me to get it? Then tell me! Tell me what terrible things you’ve done!” Beth grabbed him by the arm, and she was pretty sure it wouldn’t be that easy to make him stop and turn around if he wasn’t so drunk. He let her do this, but as soon as they were face to face again, the man sprang out of her grip as if her touch burned him.

“Oh, come on! What’s so bad about talking to me, Daryl?! It’s not a crime, you know?”

Beth could see the ice in his eyes breaking under all the emotions, but what she saw instead of anger was even worse. Daryl was hurting, and it pained Beth greatly to watch it.

“Shut up already! I ain’t explaining it to you!”

The man started walking away again, but Beth followed suit.

“And why is that?! What are you so afraid of?!”

She grabbed him by the arm again, but this time he spun around on his own, gazing at her furiously.

“Told you I ain’t afraid, girl!” His voice, even though he was still shouting, came out more raw and huskier than before, but it was the hurt in his eyes that took her aback. Beth didn’t get to answer him, though, as two men in their twenties came into her view, gave her a once-over, and then fixed their wary gazes on Daryl.

“Hey, hey! Is he troubling you?” one of them asked, and Daryl turned around to glance at them with hostility.

“She’s fine! Piss off, assholes.” Daryl hissed, and the men exchanged looks.

“Wasn’t asking you, you inbred bastard,” the other one said, apparently having no idea who he was talking to. Beth had the feeling that if she didn’t do something quickly, it wasn’t going to end well for either party. She didn’t appreciate them insulting Daryl, but that didn’t mean they deserved the beating that Daryl would inflict on them if they kept insisting on saving her from him. Although, seeing as he wasn’t too sober, it could end up with him receiving the beating instead of those men, and that was something Beth had no wish to see. So she took a calming breath, preparing herself.

“What the hell did you just say…?!”

“He’s not troubling me. It’s fine. We’re together.” Beth quipped, interrupting Daryl's middle sentence and pushing her hand into Daryl’s. Her actions had the desired effect, surprising the hell out of the three men. Both strangers furrowed their brows, watching her interlock their fingers. Daryl himself gazed at their hands, and for a second, she thought he was going to pull away. Please, don’t, the girl pleaded with him in her mind.

When just a second later he laced their fingers even more tightly, Beth breathed out a sigh of relief. At least now she was sure the biker wasn’t going to launch himself at the strangers.

“Err… aren’t you a little too young for him?” one of them asked, and Daryl’s hand jerked a little. Beth squeezed it reassuringly.

“I believe it’s none of your business.” She answered them before he could get too worked up by the strangers’ aversion to their implied relationship.

“You sure you’re fine, though?” the other one quipped, and Beth rolled her eyes.

Daryl was looking down at his boots, not saying anything, clearly embarrassed by the whole situation, and Beth suddenly wondered if pretending to be his girlfriend was a mistake. Perhaps it just made him feel worse—more like the scumbag the man apparently thought he was.

“Yeah, it’s just a little fight, really. Nothing to worry about, right?” Beth squeezed Daryl’s hand again, and it had the desired effect. Daryl raised his eyes to her, and their baby blues met. The look he gave her reminded her of the one he had given her when she visited him just a few days ago at the Dixons’. Beth’s heartbeat picked up its pace under the man’s heated gaze, and that wiggly burning feeling in her belly appeared again. Then Daryl nodded, and Beth sent him a warm smile.

“See? Thank you for your concern, though, and have a good night.”

Beth pulled Daryl away from the two men and in the direction of her truck. To her utter surprise, he not only followed her without any resistance but also didn’t try to wiggle his fingers out of her grip. His calloused palm radiated warmth against hers, and Beth wished she could hold onto it just a little longer, but her truck had already come into view, reminding her of the harsh reality in which she wasn’t Daryl Dixon’s girlfriend.

Notes:

It seems like Beth finally got to shout back at Daryl!
I hope you enjoyed it as much as I did while writing it! XD
I have to admit, I’m a bit of a drama queen, so I actually have the most fun writing their arguments. I love the side effect too—there’s just so much tension flying between them when they get into each other's faces like that!

Chapter 13: I promise you, it is

Summary:

Beth takes Daryl back to his place after their fight. With emotions still flying high, Beth seeks to understand what's going on with Daryl. Will Daryl let her in or will he keep pushing her away?

Notes:

Thank you so much for all the love in the comments under the last chapter! You all made my day, so I decided to post the next chapter sooner :)
Well, that's one of the reasons; the other is that I'm actually pretty nervous about this one (almost as nervous as Daryl and Beth in this chapter XD), and I thought, why not rip it off like a band-aid? That way, I won't have to worry about it anymore. So here you go.

I hope you're just as satisfied with it as you were with the last one! <3 Fingers crossed!

The ride to Daryl's place was mostly silent. Daryl rolled the window down and seemed to be way more interested in the landscape than continuing their earlier discussion, or rather, a fight. Perhaps that was for the better since not only wasn’t he a happy drunk, but also alcohol made him more surly and stubborn. Beth still wanted to know what was going on with him, though.

She pulled onto Daryl’s driveway and sighed. Now or never, she thought, watching the dark windows of the house in front of them.

“Daryl…”

The loud bang of the car door interrupted her before she could even muster the courage to actually ask him anything. Beth looked at the empty space that Daryl occupied just a second earlier and then to the silhouette of the man behind the car window. Her eyes followed him to the door.

Not even once did he turn around to check if she was behind him or not. Did Daryl expect her to just leave without another word? The man shut the door behind himself, and Beth jerked a little, surprised at how loud the bang was.

She bit her lip, watching the lights in what she knew to be his kitchen go on and then off again. She should leave. She knew that. She could feel that she wasn’t welcome. But Daryl needed help; she knew that too, and just a minute later, she found herself knocking on his door. Beth waited for a moment and knocked again. This time she didn’t get any response either, so she pulled the handle down in the hopes that Daryl didn’t lock the door.

He didn’t, and so Beth entered his dark living room. Even without the lights, Beth could see how much messier the place had gotten since the last time she’d been here. There were a lot of dirty plates and other stuff on the kitchen counter, some dirty socks near the couch, and a lot of beer cans. Beth even kicked one accidentally on her way to Daryl’s bedroom. She never made it there that night, though.

“Didn’t say you could come in.”

The hoarse, deep voice coming from the couch startled her so much that not only did she jerk in surprise, but also yelped.

“Daryl! Why are you sitting in the dark?”

Beth neared the couch, blinking rapidly a few times to make her vision clearer.

Daryl was sitting with his legs up on the table and a beer in hand. He took a long sip before answering her.

“Didn’t feel like turnin’ the lights on.”

The man shrugged, not sparing her as much as one glance, and Beth pressed her lips tightly together, displeased with his sour mood.

“You really think that’s a good idea?”

Beth sat down next to him, not-so-accidentally bumping their legs together. She wasn’t sure if it was that or her question that made him finally look at her.

“Wha’?”

Beth pointed to his hands with her chin.

“Another beer?”

“What, are you my chaperone now?” Daryl hissed at her and took another mouthful of beer, going back to staring straight ahead instead of looking at her. Beth herself didn’t drop her gaze from the man’s face, watching him and trying to figure out what was going on in his head. It felt like no matter what kind of approach she took, Daryl was shutting her off more and more with every exchange they had. Her curiosity wasn’t even the main reason she wanted him to open up anymore. Beth felt genuinely worried about how upset and miserable he seemed to be. Getting drunk and starting bar fights was his way of running from something; she was sure of it—even if he’d never admit it to her, or maybe even to himself.

The silence stretched out between them, but Beth didn’t feel awkward at all. In fact, she’d never felt so comfortable sitting in silence in the dark with anyone else. It could actually be nice if it wasn’t for the fact that she was desperate to figure out how to help him feel better.

Daryl finished off his beer by taking a few mouthful sips one by one in a very short span of time. Then he got up, threw the bottle away—the glass shattering somewhere near the kitchen counter—and went to the fridge for another beer.

“I thought you said you didn’t like the place messy,” she commented but didn’t receive any response from the man.

Beth watched Daryl come back to the couch and plunk down in the same spot, not minding her at all. As if she wasn’t even there.

“Daryl…” the girl started, but she didn’t get to finish her thought this time.

“Your dad called the Dixon’s garage today.” Daryl took a sip of his beer.

“Did he?” Beth asked, surprised when Daryl didn’t follow up the sentence with anything else.

“Mhmm.” Another sip of the beer. Even without any lights on, Beth could still see how shiny his lips became because of the liquor, and suddenly Beth was grateful for the darkness because she was pretty sure that he would’ve noticed how mesmerized she was by it. “I had thought he wanted to ask if I could come by and look at the truck or somethin’ but it wasn’t about that at all. Was so fuckin’ grateful that I brought you home last time he invited me for dinner. He’s treating me like I’m some hero.”

The man’s voice broke a little, and he turned his face away from her as if this admission made him feel ashamed.

“Is this a bad thing?” Beth’s voice was almost a whisper. It was breaking a little too from all the shouting she’d done earlier that day.

“Wouldn’t be. But he has no idea. Thinks I’m a good man. Just like you. Comin’ to me with… with all your damn cookies. Smilin’ at me like I deserve it.”

“You do deserve it, Daryl.”

Beth watched him warily, trying to overcome the need to hug him. She had the feeling that Daryl wouldn’t appreciate it at the moment. Even more, that it wouldn’t be welcome at all.

“No, I don’t. Not after…” The man shook his head, apparently not being able to finish this sentence. He followed it up with another bit of unfinished thought: “And even before…”

Beth watched him clench his hands on the bottle, his whole body tense, and his distress more evident than ever.

“Before what, Daryl? What is it that you feel so guilty for?”

Another sip of the beer. Beth changed her position, propping her elbow on the headrest and holding her legs up to rest them on the couch, pressing one to another. If she brushed Daryl’s hip and then waist, it was done so accidentally, but Beth would lie if it didn’t send a shiver down her spine when the action made Daryl slide his eyes up her legs. Daryl caressed his lower lip between his teeth while doing so, not helping her fight the desire to kiss him. God, I need help, Beth thought, realizing that apparently, she was into him even when he was drunk and throwing tantrums.

“I lied to you. Said that you didn’t do nothing on Friday.” He shook his head, his throat bobbing with the next swallow. Beth tensed at his words, the notion of him being this upset about something she’d done leaving her speechless. “But you did, and I-uh, I let you…”

He fell silent again, pressing his lips tightly together as if it hurt him physically to say those words out loud. Beth’s heartbeat quickened again, and she felt as if she could actually hear it in her ears. In all honesty, the girl knew before she asked. Had that gut feeling, but needed to hear it from him anyway. Needed to make sure that what she thought about really happened. It seemed impossible, but that was the only thing she could think of that would make him this upset.

“What did I do, Daryl?”

Daryl fixed his gaze on the bottle sitting on his lap, and perhaps for the better, since the next words he uttered made her mouth fall open.

“You kissed me.” The silence that fell over them after that sentence wasn’t as comfortable as the first one. It wasn’t awkward either, though. What Beth felt watching him take that stupid bottle back to his mouth, to the lips that she kissed and had no recollection of, was not shame or anxiety. If the girl had to describe it to someone, she would’ve used the word electricity. It felt like all of the air had been pushed out of her lungs, and a strange, unfamiliar kind of tension took over her whole body, making her squeal internally. “Did it fucking twice, to be exact.”

Beth hoped he didn’t hear the huge intake of breath that followed that statement. She kissed Daryl Dixon. Kissed him twice and didn’t remember it. That realization hit her hard, and even though she tried very hard, Beth didn’t manage to stop the pathetic whine from escaping her mouth. The girl quickly covered her face with her hand, but the damage was already done. Even in the dark, Beth could see the grimace of disgust that crossed his face when the man spoke again.

“I’m sorry, Beth.”

That caught her by surprise.

“What are you sorry for?” Beth whispered back and watched him lick the taste of liquor from his lips.

“What am I sorry for? You kiddin’ me? You were on drugs, swayin’ on your damn feet, and confused me with Zach! I should’ve been more careful. Should’ve reacted quicker. I just…”

Zach? What did Zach have to do with it?

“Zach? Why would you think that?”

Daryl raised his head, and Beth blushed heavily under his dark, heated gaze. She didn’t turn her eyes away, though, compelled to look into those enigmatic baby blues of his. The longer they stared at each other, the more unbearable that funny feeling down her tummy was becoming. The unspoken question lingered in the air, making it thick with tension.

“You said that you had thought I would never come when you saw me back then. You invited Zach, were waitin’ for him, so you must have just…”

Daryl shrugged, looking away from her and down to his feet. Beth wasn’t sure if it was because she couldn’t stand him blaming himself like this, or because she’d gotten tired of pretending that she didn’t want him, but just a moment later she found herself whispering:

“I was waiting for you, Daryl.”

Daryl fixed his gaze on her again, and Beth felt that familiar spark—the one that had been simmering ever since she’d realized just how badly she wanted him. The intensity of his stare sent a shiver down her spine, igniting a dark, thrilling heat that was both exhilarating and torturous. She knew what this feeling was; she’d known for a while now, even though she tried to bury it. But every time he looked at her like that, with that guarded, smoldering gaze, the desire flared up, impossible to ignore.

This wasn’t some innocent crush, or even the kind of fleeting attraction she thought she understood. Beth wanted him with an ache that was almost maddening, a need that went beyond anything her friends’ stories or her novels could have prepared her for. She didn’t just want to kiss him; she wanted to hold him tight, to feel the warmth of his body against hers, wanted him close in ways that made her heart pound and her cheeks burn. The longing was terrifying, thrilling, and relentless—and the worst part was, she had no idea if he felt any of it too.

“What do you mean by that? You didn’t know I was coming, girl. You couldn’t…”

“I-um, didn’t you notice…? Of course, you didn’t, who am I kidding? I-uh, I only told Zach about the Bronze, because I wanted you to know where I was going after the gala,” Beth admitted quietly, still blushing heavily under Daryl’s gaze. Her eyes fled to the side, that quiet admission bringing her even closer to uncovering all the deepest desires of her heart.

“Why?” he asked incredulously, and Beth looked up at him, her heartbeat quickening at the thought of telling him. Of simply revealing it all to him at that moment. The words didn’t want to leave her throat, though, not yet, and she ended up just staring at him, drinking in his lovely features.

“Beth?” he urged on after a moment, and the sound of her name in his mouth made her shiver with want. If only Daryl felt the same about her…

“Did you…?” Beth had to take another breath to calm herself down a little. “Did you kiss me back?”

Daryl dropped his gaze back to the bottle. The man took his time, taking his feet off the table, straightening a little, and clearing his throat before answering the question.

“No.”

He stood up then, put the empty bottle on the table, and grabbed the cigarettes from the vest laying on the chair.

“Oh.” Beth bit her lip, feeling a pang of disappointment she couldn’t quite hide. She watched as Daryl moved from the chair to the kitchen counter, lighting a cigarette with practiced ease. He leaned back, exhaling smoke in slow, steady breaths, looking impossibly good while doing it. Beth hated cigarettes and everything they stood for—hated how they’d somehow become romanticized. But, Lord help her, Daryl made it look irresistible. The roughness of his calloused hands, the way his jaw clenched as he took a drag, everything about him was drawing her in, no matter how hard she tried to resist. She cleared her throat, trying to keep her voice steady. “Why didn’t you?”

She wasn’t sure what compelled her to ask that question. Perhaps it was the darkness that made her brave enough to do so. It could also be the fact that she didn’t understand why he was so angry and felt so guilty about it if he didn’t do anything.

“What do you mean why? What kinda question is that?” Her question seemed to anger him again. Daryl started to pace, throwing his hands out in rage. “You think I just go around kissin’ teenage girls? Takin’ advantage of them when they’re high on some shit?! Is that what you think of me, huh?!”

Of course not, stupid girl, why on Earth would he want to kiss you back? Beth let her gaze fall down to her hands, her excitement turning into another wave of disappointment.

“I didn’t mean anything bad by that, Daryl,” she said quietly, willing her silly heart to stop hurting. “I guess I was just wondering if it was that terrible for you.”

“I was sober and was supposed to make sure you don’t do nothin' stupid! I shouldn’t…” The man stopped pacing suddenly, and a painful groan escaped his mouth. “Fuck!”

Beth was on her feet in an instant.

“What?! What happened?!”

“Fucking glass. Shit!” The man grabbed onto the counter, raising one of his feet up, and it wasn’t until then that Beth remembered the bottle that Daryl had shattered near the kitchen. She neared the space between them in a matter of seconds, safe from the glass thanks to her shoes.

“Come on. Let me help you.” She offered him her shoulder.

“Nah, I’m fine.”

“No, you’re not. Don’t be a baby about it,” she took him by the arm, and surprisingly enough, Daryl didn’t oppose the idea any longer.

They made their way to the couch, and right after the man dropped onto it, Beth started looking for the light switch. She found it pretty quickly, and soon the room was lit up. When she got back to the couch, Daryl had his foot up already, examining the damage.

The chip that he stood on was so big it was actually impressive that Daryl wasn’t crying in pain.

"Good thing I’m a lil’ drunk, huh?” Daryl said, his voice lighter than she’d heard it all day. One corner of his mouth quirked up in a half-smile, and Beth felt a flutter in her stomach, warmth spreading through her at the sight of that rare expression.

“A little?” she teased, arching an eyebrow and the amused glint in his eyes darkened into a mock glare, making her shrink back. Then her eyes fell to his foot, where a shard of glass was sticking out, blood seeping around it, and her heart twisted with worry.

“It doesn’t look too good. I think we should get you to the hospital. The glass could—”

“Nuh-uh. No hospitals.” Daryl shook his head firmly. “Gonna get it out myself.”

Beth huffed, exasperated.

“And then what? Bleed out? Not gonna happen.” She planted her hands on her hips, trying not to let her worry show too much. “I left my phone in the truck. Where’s…?”

“Nah. It’s alright,” he cut her off, his voice steadier than she expected, even as he winced slightly, shifting his weight. “I can stitch myself up. Have done it many times.”

There was a flash of stubborn defiance in his eyes, as if he’d rather limp for miles than ever admit he needed help.

“While drunk?” Beth raised her eyebrows questioningly, but it didn’t throw him off track. Daryl gave her a blank look, and although he didn’t answer that question, Beth could tell what the answer was. The notion that he’d made a habit of stitching himself up while under the influence didn’t sit right with her.

“You’ll find the first aid kit in the top cupboard, right corner. Kitchen. And bring me a beer while you’re at it, will ya?” Daryl grumbled, settling himself on the edge of the couch and pulling his foot up to rest on the table.

Beth crossed her arms, giving him a look. “Don’t you think you’ve had enough already?”

Daryl rolled his eyes, but his voice lacked ire when he muttered, “You’re no fun, girl.”

“You say that, but I’m not the one getting myself drunk and miserable over a little kissin’.” As the words left her mouth, Beth felt her cheeks flush, and she quickly turned around, hiding the redness creeping up her face. She didn’t even know where the comment had come from, but it seemed to do the trick; the room went silent, and she could practically feel his gaze on her back. Beth counted the silence as a small victory, biting her lip to stifle a smile.

Beth followed Daryl’s instructions, and after just a minute, came back with what they needed. She was not going to let him do it all by himself, though, and she was ready to fight over it if needed.

She took the supplies out of the box and asked him to put his foot on the couch instead of the table while she went to grab a bowl out of the cupboards. She filled it with water and then went back to the couch. She situated herself at the other end of it and started cutting the bandage. Daryl didn’t move or utter any sound, so Beth looked up at him, only to be met with a raw, brooding glint in his darkened blue eyes.

“What?” Beth asked, and the man cleared his throat before answering,

“You really wanna do this?”

“Well, yeah? I don’t have a long history of stitching people up, but at least I’m not drunk, and I did help Daddy in the clinic a few times.”

Daryl watched her for a moment longer, and she was convinced that there was something more he wanted to say, but he didn’t utter another word. Instead, he did what she asked and let her do the work.

He didn’t say anything while she was cutting his sock with scissors to gain more access to his skin or when she readied herself to pull the glass out. He was so silent it was almost worrying, and Beth was on the verge of asking something—anything—to make sure he was okay when the man uttered the question that made her stop all that she was doing.

“Don’t you feel disgusted?”

Beth scrunched her eyebrows.

“There’s almost no blood yet, Daryl. And I live on a farm. I’ve seen a lot of things. Why…”

“No.” The man dropped his gaze to his legs and brought his thumb to his mouth before clarifying. “I mean, you know, you don’t seem too disgusted by this whole... kissin’ thing.”

“That’s because I’m not.”

Daryl turned his eyes away from her, shaking his head as if he wanted to get rid of some unwelcome thoughts.

“Yeah, right, ‘cause it’s so damn pleasant to kiss some old dirty redneck trash…”

“Daryl.” Beth couldn’t listen to Daryl talking about himself like this. She wanted to tell him then. For just a second, she was ready to tell him just how differently she saw him from how he seemed to perceive himself. Daryl didn’t let her get past saying his name, though.

“I just don’t get it. I thought you’d call me a creep and run away.” His voice was a quiet, gruff whisper, as if he didn’t really want her to hear all that he was saying, as if he was embarrassed by himself.

Did he really think that lowly of himself? And how could he even say all that when she had already told him she was waiting for him? When she told him she purposely invited Zach to that club in front of Daryl. How could he not arrive at the right conclusion after that?
Perhaps, Beth thought, Daryl didn’t want to see it for what it was. Perhaps it was easier not to see what was in front of him—especially if he didn’t feel the same…
Beth cleared her throat, catching the man’s attention again.

“You’re not a creep, Daryl.” She sent him a kind but sad smile and looked down at his foot for a moment before raising her eyes to meet his again. Their baby blues met once more, and Beth said, though it pained her to think of their kiss as something that made him feel bad, “Why are you so angry at yourself if you didn’t kiss me back, anyway? I’m the one who should be sorry for making you suffer through this twice.” She took a huge gulp of air before continuing, the words heavy on her poor heart. “Even if I was drugged, I shouldn’t have pushed you into something you didn’t want, you know? Like, it wasn’t your fault that you didn’t know how to react, right?”

Daryl watched her for a few seconds before snorting and looking away. Beth waited for him to say something to that, to explain his reaction in any way, but she was met with disappointment when he fell silent again. It was fine, she told herself; her heart wasn’t shattering with every small rejection. Not at all.

She focused on the task at hand, knowing it wouldn’t do them any good if her vision became blurred with tears.

“Alright. I’m gonna remove the glass, but I still think it should be done by someone…”

“Just do it,” Daryl interrupted her, not even raising his eyes, and Beth sighed. She didn’t like it at all.

As it turned out, the glass hadn’t cut as deeply as it looked, but the wound still bled a lot, and even though Beth tried really hard to clean it up quickly and avoid making a mess, it was unavoidable.

Daryl, for his part, hissed in pain only once when she was removing the glass. Aside from that, he was so silent that Beth had to look up a few times to check if he was alright.

“I’m alright. Keep goin’,” he told her in a hushed voice, and though Beth could tell that the alcohol hadn’t numbed his pain as well as Daryl thought it would, she had no other option but to do as he wanted. She just hoped she’d be able to convince him to see a doctor in the morning. Someone more experienced should check to ensure no nerves were damaged by the glass.

Beth stitched the wound, trying to be as delicate as possible, and once she was done, she wrapped it in a bandage and gently moved his foot off the couch to close the space between her and Daryl. She sat next to him, just as close as before his little accident, and reached out.

“The hell you think you’re doin’?” Daryl drew his hands back when she tried to get hold of them.

“You still have some blood on your knuckles and face, Daryl. Don’t you think it’s wise to clean it up too?”

Daryl mumbled something indistinctly but this time didn’t protest when Beth took his hand in hers and started cleaning his abrasions, first with water, then with antiseptic cream. Perhaps it was because of their closeness but this felt way more intimate than just holding his hand. Daryl’s heavy breathing was the only sound Beth could focus on and it didn’t help in calming her heartbeat down. In fact, it did the total opposite. The tension returned to her bones squeezing her tummy. It was an agony to sit so close to him with his hands in hers and with the knowledge that she had her lips on his but will never know how it felt.

Beth shifted closer, her knees brushing against Daryl’s as she moved to clean his face. She held a damp cloth, the warmth of it already fading as she carefully raised it to his cheek. Daryl flinched just slightly as the cool fabric touched his skin, but he didn’t pull away. Instead, he watched her in silence, his eyes tracing the gentle concentration etched across her face.

She tried to focus, tried to stay calm, but being this close to him was making her dizzy. As she dabbed at a dried streak of blood near his eyebrow, Beth’s fingers trembled slightly. She was so close that she could see the faint scar that traced his cheekbone, the way his hair fell just above his eyes, she could smell his cologne again, this time mixed with sweat and alcohol. It was hard not to get lost in the moment, the intimacy of it all tightening in her chest. The warmth of his breath sent shivers down her spine.

“Ya done yet?” Daryl’s voice broke through her thoughts, softer than usual, almost hesitant. It made her pulse quicken, a thrill coursing through her at the sound of his gravelly tone.

“Almost,” she murmured, her eyes flickering to meet his for a brief moment. The connection felt electric, and she swallowed hard, trying to keep her focus. She tilted his chin gently, her thumb brushing along his jawline, her skin against his roughness sending warmth coursing through her.

Each second stretched longer, the silence between them becoming heavy with unspoken words. The tension was almost unbearable, and she knew she shouldn’t linger, yet something pulled her closer.

“Beth?” She let her eyes trail to his again, the questioning tone making all her insides twist in anticipation. The way he was looking at her was consuming her, the heat of it making her want to act on all the reckless thoughts swimming in her mind. Her treacherous heart was urging her to close the distance, to surrender to the connection that felt as fragile as it was undeniable.  “I wasn’t sufferin’.”

Those few words uttered by Daryl in a hushed intimate half-whisper took her breath away. Even though it was a few minutes after Beth’s little speech, she still knew what he was referring to. Suddenly, her lips felt way too dry. She licked them instinctively, a small, desperate act to soothe the sudden ache that bloomed in her chest, and the movement drew Daryl's attention down to her lips, his gaze sharpening.

“You need to go,” he said hoarsely, suddenly trying to distance himself from her. Beth didn’t let him, holding him in place with a hand on his chest, her fingers tangling in the material of his shirt.

“Daryl, wait.”

“No, you don’t get it! I can’t…” He stopped trying to get up and instead looked at her with a pained expression. His blue eyes darkened, and he gulped. “It felt good, alright? You kissin’ me? Touchin’ me? It don’t matter that I didn’t kiss ya back—you were high on some shit, and I still…” He averted his eyes then, hanging his head low in guilt, his hands coming up to hide his expression from her, the sentence remaining unfinished. He started again, desperate to get it off his chest, even as words got stuck in his throat. “And when you came to see me after, I just couldn’t stop thinkin’ ‘bout it. Like some perverted asshole, I saw you in that dress an’…”

“Shush.”

She gently cupped his chin in her hand, making him gasp and cut off his rant. Daryl jerked a little when Beth’s fingers traveled up his face, and she caressed his cheek with one hand, trying to pull his face to the side and up, to see him fully.

“Daryl, please, look at me,” Beth pleaded when he pulled his face away. He did look at her a moment later, though, as she took his face in her hand again. Beth smiled at him, and Daryl almost choked on air when she brushed his lips with her thumb gently. Her heart was pounding in her chest, her head swimming with thoughts, but she willed herself to stay calm as she said, affection seeping into her voice, “It’s fine.”

“It ain’t,” Daryl insisted, his voice breaking under all the emotions. In response, Beth moved, bringing their faces even closer and pulling her legs up to sit on them.

“I promise you, Daryl, it is.”

Beth’s heart was on the verge of jumping out of her chest, and she felt as if she’d entered some dream world, but she didn’t stop, her one goal in mind: to make Daryl understand that it was fine, that he wasn’t a monster. 

“Don’t," he uttered quietly.

If she thought they were close before, now the remaining space between them seemed oppressive. As their foreheads touched, she could feel his hot breath on her lips, her eyes fixed on his. He was peering up at her now with a haunting expression and it was that look that made her shiver with want. The feeling only grew stronger when he looked down to her lips as she spoke.

“Look, I don’t remember kissin’ you” she whispered, gazing at him with longing, her voice still shaky. Oh, how she wished she could get her memories back, now more than ever. “But I know that I didn’t do it, because someone put drugs into my drink, Daryl. I did it, because I wanted to.” His eyes snapped to hers and Beth had to keep herself from whining at the sight of his dilated pupils. She pushed through her own fear of rejections and whispered: “I still do.”

She wasn’t sure what possessed her at that moment. Perhaps it was the knowledge that she already kissed him, perhaps the overwhelming need to know what his lips tasted like, but she moved forward, closing the space between them. 

Beth brushed their lips together faintly, her small body trembling against his. He didn’t move, didn’t press his lips back to hers, and when she moved away just far enough to look him in the eyes, he started, his voice hoarse and just as shaky as hers: 

 “Beth, you don’t…”

Don’t know what you’re saying? Don’t know what you’re doing? Don’t want that? Screw that, Beth thought, adrenaline coursing through her veins. 

“I do,” she insisted and shushed him with yet another, although much less delicate, more fervent kiss. It pushed the air out of Daryl’s lungs and when Beth moved away this time, Daryl followed her, pressing their noses together. Beth gulped, her heart jumping to her throat, but he stopped, short of kissing her, his breath ghosting on her lips. She felt so hot, it was hard to think, hard to talk herself out of leaning in again, pressing her own delicate lips into his chapped ones. 

This time, the kiss lingered. Beth pressed into him a little more, capturing his lower lip between hers and stifling a soft whimper as Daryl let out a strangled sound. Finally, he pressed his trembling lips gently back to hers. She could feel him raising his hands to her face, yet they never made contact, leaving her yearning for his touch. Her own hands rushed up his face and tangled in his hair, as she savored the warmth of his lips.

Good Lord, I want you so much. Please.

“It's okay, Daryl. You can touch me if you want.” Beth whispered against his lips, gazing into his darkened eyes. With a shaky breath, he surrendered to the urge, his fingertips trembling as they brushed against her cheek, then twisted in her hair as he pulled her closer, desperation to feel every inch of her warmth against him overpowering him. 

Daryl’s breath mingled with hers as their lips touched again, and neither of them was strong enough to keep the caress light and innocent this time. Beth crushed into him, her tongue slipping out to tease his lower lip and as the kisses became more heated she found herself brave enough to push herself into his lap. His silent whimper joined her desperate moan when their tongues finally tangled in an excruciatingly slow steamy dance, and as Beth pressed into him, he gripped her under her knees, helping her settle closer, their bodies crashing together with an urgency that felt almost frantic. Each kiss was deep, searing, and passionate, making her feel things she had only read about in romance novels.

They lost themselves in the moment, their breaths coming in short gasps as they explored each other with an insatiable hunger, the world around them fading into nothingness. 

All that mattered in that moment was the feeling of his calloused fingers tangling in her hair, the sweet press of his arms around her back as he pushed her into himself even more tightly, the heated air between them and the new, exciting sensation that run through her the moment she shifted on his lap and found herself sitting on the unmistakable hard prove of his desire. 

A thrilling jolt ignited every nerve in her body and made her heart race with urgency when she shifted slightly again, his hardness pressing right where she ached for it. She whimpered at the feeling and blushed heavily when Daryl took her face in his hand, his fingers brushing her cheeks, and pushed back gently, forcing their lips apart. They were both breathing heavily, and Beth could only stifle another whimper at the sight of him, his heated gaze locking onto hers.

"Don't," he croaked and moved his other hand down to her thighs, intending to gently push her back, but Beth didn't let him. 

This time, she moved slowly, grinding down against him with deliberate intention, her eyes never leaving his. The way she pressed against him ignited waves of desire that surged between them, leaving them both shivering with need as Daryl's breath hitched, a low growl escaping him in response to her teasing movements.

“ Girl.” The man’s low voice rumbled out of his throat laced with lust, and Beth gasped as the heat spiraled through her body. The warning did little to stop her from moving her hips again, and Beth knew it was worth it when Daryl gasped, his hips snapping under her and another heady moan escaping his throat. The sounds he made enveloped her senses, each one striking a chord deep within her. This time, it was Daryl that pulled her closer, his hand angling her head to give himself a better access to her lips. Beth instinctively surrendered, allowing him to unravel her with his tender yet fervent kisses.

It was good to feel him like this, even with the barrier of their clothes. She couldn’t believe that something like this could feel so thrilling, arousing her to the point where her world narrowed to him alone, where she couldn’t think or do anything else but seek more friction, feel him even closer, to kiss him with even more passion in the hope of hearing him moan her name. Her whole body was shouting for more, hormones making it hard to think rationally, and she wasn’t sure how much time passed, before Daryl pulled back again. 

“God, Beth...” They were both breathing heavily against each other, both teetering on the edge of something exhilarating and completely new. But out of the two of them, only Daryl still wrestled with his resolve. “We should stop.” His voice was strained, the words a desperate attempt to rein in the desire threatening to consume them both.

“Why?” the girl whispered against his lips, brushing them together again and eliciting another whimper from him, one that she could only follow with one of her own. She stopped moving, though, the foreign feeling building between her legs both thrilling and scaring her at the same time. Her heartbeat was so loud she could hear it in her ears, his erection straining against his jeans, pulsing under her and making the heat in her panties almost unbearable.

“I’m drunk, and you’re… It ain’t right.”

Beth rested her forehead against his again and closed her eyes.

“Okay, yeah,” she breathed out, fighting the urge to close the distance between them again. His breath was still making her lips tingle, the desire only stronger now that she knew how his kisses tasted.

Even now, just sitting, feeling him so close, his chest rising rapidly as he tried to calm himself down too, was so much nicer than anything she’d ever done with Jimmy. He said that it was wrong, that they should stop, but all she could think about was how right it felt, how amazingly good. It made her feel giddy.

Beth had no idea how much time she’d spent at his place, but she was pretty sure it was long enough for her parents to start worrying, and the thought of having to explain to them what she was doing this whole time brought her down from the rush of desire to the harsh reality. To say that Beth couldn’t believe she’d just full-on made out with Daryl Dixon was an understatement. It made her feel both extremely pleased with herself and scared of what he might think of her. Did she come off as needy to him? Was she too forward? She realized now that she’d pushed herself onto him again, perhaps in a similar manner to the first time—the only difference being that now it was him who was under the influence.

Beth opened her eyes and pulled back a little, but instead of looking him in the eyes, she dropped her gaze to his chest, suddenly bashful. What if she’d just made a mistake? What if he was going to be angry with her?

“I’m sorry,” she whispered, feeling the blush spread on her cheeks.

“For what?” His cracked, rasping voice was suddenly laced with concern.

Beth shrugged but then answered him in a small, hushed voice.

“For being so needy.”

Daryl snorted, and Beth swallowed audibly, thinking that he wasn’t even trying to hide his amusement, and feeling even sillier. Instead of ridiculing her, though, as she expected him to do for a second or two, Daryl took her chin between his fingers and pulled it up a little to make her look at him. It was a gentle but firm touch that made Beth’s heart jump in her chest again, the prospect of him kissing her again sending another thrill of want through her body. As she looked up, though, he dropped his hand. And you thought he was going to kiss you, silly.

“Nothing wrong with being horny, girl.”

Beth watched him silently for a moment, assessing if he was being sincere with her.

“You sure?”

“Yeah, ‘m sure, but I’m also a lil’ wasted, and you should probably get home before someone calls for a search party, you know?”

Beth nodded and leaned in to hug him, pressing her face against his chest. She smiled against him when he tentatively embraced her back, and they stayed like that for another moment, just breathing each other in. She wished she could stay like this with him, but he was right—not only because she was supposed to be back home a long time ago, but also because this thing between them had become very heated very fast, and Beth wasn’t sure she was ready for where it could lead.

She took another calming breath as she slid off him a minute later. It was much easier to focus that way. She couldn’t help herself, though, and she eyed the evidence of his want for her. Even through the jeans, he seemed huge, and Beth blushed a little at the thought that, not even a minute ago, she had been on him, making him feel hot and bothered for her. It seemed surreal now that there was some space between them.

Daryl rested his head on the headrest, straightening out his legs and putting them back on the table, crossing them by the ankles.

“Are you going to be alright?” she asked, thinking back to how guilty Daryl had felt before, even though he didn’t kiss her then. Beth watched him bring his thumb to his mouth for a moment before gazing at her and grunting in response to her question. It didn’t seem convincing, though, so Beth tried again. “Just, promise me you’re not going to feel guilty about kissing me?”

The man huffed a laugh, but it wasn’t a happy sound at all.

“You want me to lie to you?”

“Daryl.”

“Just go, Beth. We’ll talk about it later.”

Beth sighed. She didn’t want to go; she’d prefer to just stay here with him, maybe kiss him some more, but she knew that would be a mistake. She should go home, should give him space, should give herself time to think about what just happened, about how it all consumed her. She’d never thought it could feel like this—so strong and so overpowering.

“Alright. At least be careful with your injury, okay?” Beth asked, biting her swollen lip in concern. Daryl nodded, still not looking at her, and Beth leaned in once again, surprising him with a small, affectionate kiss on the cheek. “Goodnight, Daryl.”

She smiled sweetly, seeing his cheeks go a little red, and then got up to leave. Beth was already opening the door when the man finally caught on to what was happening, and she heard his quiet response.

“Night, Beth.”

Beth fought the urge to follow it up with a “see you tomorrow.” No matter how much she wanted to see him the next day, Beth felt like pushing him into agreeing to meet her while he still wasn’t sober would be crossing a line—not the first one she’d crossed that day, but one too many.

Chapter 14: I lied to you, okay?

Summary:

What happens after you kiss someone you shouldn't? If you're Beth Greene, you tell your friends about it, and if you're Daryl Dixon? Let's see...

Notes:

This week is full of surprising chapters, isn't it?
I'm not sure I'll be able to publish another chapter on the Weekend though, so here you go.
I'm so happy you guys loved the last chapter so much, it means so much to me, you have no idea! <3
P.S. And just so you know, I'm just obsessed with this story as you are, rereading chapters a few times before publishing them like a total weirdo that I am XD.

***

The clock on her phone showed twelve past ten, and the girl had seven unanswered phone calls from her mom, three from Amy, and one from Lilly. There were also texts from Shawn, her friends, and, even though Annette hated writing messages, Beth had one from her too. Beth groaned in despair, already knowing she was in trouble. Her mother probably already knew Beth had left Amy’s flat right past eight, and therefore, Beth had no excuse for being so late. She shouldn’t have left her phone in the car—Beth knew that now—but it didn’t make her feel as sorry as it should. If she hadn’t forgotten the device, she wouldn’t have just spent approximately half an hour snogging Daryl Dixon on his couch, and that was something Beth wouldn’t exchange for anything.

However, now Beth had to come up with an excuse, and she had to do it before her parents literally called a search party. She wasn’t too good at lying, and with the image of Daryl’s lips on hers burned into her head, it would be an even bigger hardship to come up with something believable. 

The girl was still trying to come up with something when her phone started ringing again.

Surprisingly enough, it was Daryl. Beth didn’t manage to suppress a smile as she answered the call, her heartbeat picking up its pace. Even the panic about her parents couldn’t dampen her excitement over what had transpired between them.

“Yeah?”

“Any reason you’re still creepin’ on me from my driveway?”

The sound of his gravelly voice on the other line brought back that familiar funny feeling in her tummy. Butterflies. He didn’t sound too unhappy with her, though. If anything, there was a playful note to his tone, one she loved hearing from him.

“I’m not creeping on you, Daryl,” she whined defensively, still smiling. “It’s just that I think you were right about the search party. I have hundreds of unanswered phone calls and messages on my phone, and I need to come up with an excuse before answering them.”

“Can’t you tell them you were visitin’ a friend?”

Beth sighed. If only it were that simple.

“Yeah, that’s what I wanted to do, but I’m afraid my mom has already called them.”

Beth heard some shuffling on the other side and the squeaking of the couch. Daryl huffed with exertion before answering.

“Why don’t you tell them the truth then?”

“The truth?” Beth squealed. “Daryl, I don’t think they would be happy hearing I was too busy making out with…”

“I ain’t talkin’ about that part, girl,” the man growled, and Beth blushed heavily. Of course, he didn’t mean the kissing, you silly girl. “Just tell ‘em you hit me with the car. I refused to let you get my drunk ass to the hospital, so you brought me home and patched me up.”

“Yeah, but isn’t that a little suspicious?”

“Only if you make it sound like it.”

“You’re right,” Beth said, calming herself down. “Nothing wrong with helping you out. Especially after hurting you.”

Daryl snorted, and Beth imagined him smiling, even through the self-deprecation that followed.

“Everything’s wrong with that if you look at what we did later, sweetheart.”

Beth blushed again, her mind coming to a halt with that last word. No one would ever get Beth to admit how much it pleased her to hear him using terms of endearment toward her. It was hard to believe, really, how many things that one word could make Beth feel. Or perhaps two words since his we had a pleasant ring to it too. It wasn’t just him who did something he thought was wrong anymore—they were accomplices now. But even though Beth kind of liked the sound of that, she wasn’t going to let him berate himself for it again. Not when it felt so good to be like this with him. Not when kissing had never felt so amazing before.

“It’s not true. We’re just two people liking each other, it’s really quite…”

Her phone beeped as a notification came through. It only did that when someone tried calling her while she was on the line with someone else, and Beth had a pretty good idea who was trying to contact her again. The phone kept beeping, and the panic woke up within her again at the thought of her worried mother.

“Daryl, I need to go. I think my mom tried callin’ me again.”

“Sure. It’s about time you stop creepin’ under my windows anyway.”

Daryl’s voice sounded a little sleepy as he repeated his earlier words, and Beth smiled to herself when, just a moment later, she heard him yawning. His obvious tiredness made her feel a bit better about how abruptly she had to finish their conversation. She couldn’t end it before telling him, though.

“Daryl…” Beth took her bottom lip between her teeth, listening to his confirming grunt. Her heartbeat picked up its pace again, the admission bubbling out of her before she could think it through. “I really like you. You know that, right?”

Daryl was quiet for a long moment, and nerves started overtaking her again. It was both exhilarating and scary to be this vulnerable with someone.

“Mhm.”

When he didn’t follow it up with anything else, Beth sighed, disappointed. She could tell he enjoyed kissing her, but she’d love to hear him say that out loud, to tell her that he liked her too, and not only because kissing her felt nice, but because of other things too.

“Okay. Goodnight,” she said yet again, and in response, she got another grunt. The girl hung up, just in time to receive another phone call—this time from her unhappy mother.

To say that her parents weren’t happy with her was an understatement. Beth had never seen her mother so angry in her entire life, and when Beth told her what exactly she’d been doing for those two hours and with whom, the girl watched, for the first time in her life, as the color drained from Annette’s face. Beth didn’t want to know what would happen if her mom knew how this story ended in reality—not with her leaving Daryl passed out on the couch, but with them making out like two horny teenagers.

“Dear Lord, Beth! Are you sure you’re alright? He didn’t try anything, did he?!” Her mother gripped her by the shoulders, and Beth felt herself blushing a little at the suggestion her mother had just made.

“No, Mom! Of course not.” Beth's voice sounded squeaky even to her own ears. She didn’t like her mother assuming things like that about Daryl. It was hard to argue, though, with the image of his hands on her, the ghost of his fingers tangling in her hair, tracing the lines of her face, and the warmth radiating from his body as she instinctively moved in a way that now made her blush fiercely, still alive and vibrant in her mind.

Her mom let go of her and turned around to look at her father, her face still pale and hands shaking.

“See, Hershel? I told you we shouldn’t let this unrefined man into our house! Told you he meant trouble! And you still invited him over for dinner! Why don’t you ever listen to me?!” Annette accused her father when the first shock wore off, and she was able to use her voice again. Hershel, who up to this point let her mother deal with Beth, opened his mouth to voice what the youngest Greene hoped was a disagreement. Beth didn’t let him do that, though.

“I don’t understand. How does that change anything? Daryl didn’t do anything wrong, Mom!”

“Nothing wrong, you say?! How about the fact that this man is a disgrace? Getting himself drunk like this, getting into fights, and almost making my daughter into a criminal?! Does it sound like nothing wrong?”

“Annette, honey, don’t you think you’re exaggerating a little?” Hershel quipped in, trying to calm his wife down and failing miserably.

“Exaggerating? Our daughter just hauled this man home while he was drunk, and we all know how these kinds of people behave when they’re under the influence! Don’t even try telling me differently! Daryl Dixon is a dangerous man, and I don’t want any of my children to get acquainted with someone like this. Is that so hard to understand?”

Hershel sighed, his resolve breaking, and Beth felt like screaming when she heard his next sentence:

“Alright. I’ll call him tomorrow and tell him that we changed our plans. How does that sound?”

“Perfect,” her mom sighed with relief.

“No, you can’t do that!” Both of her parents looked back at her, surprised by her ill manners. The girl changed her tone quickly, knowing that she wouldn’t achieve anything by being rude. “Daddy, please don’t do this. You invited him to dinner to thank him for saving me from who knows what that stranger from the Bronze wanted to do to me. Don’t you remember? Doesn’t he deserve our gratitude, no matter if he meets our standards or not?”

Hershel looked back at Annette, his gaze softening in response to Beth’s words.

“Our girl has a point, honey.”

“Our girl has no right to make any points after not responding to any of our calls for two hours. Again, may I add. I honestly don’t know what’s going on with you lately, Bethy, but this has to end.” Annette stated firmly and left the living room, leaving Beth with her father.

“Daddy, I’m really sorry about this, but please don’t punish Daryl for my mistakes. It’s only my fault that I left my phone in the truck.”

“I know, baby, but I’m afraid your mother sees things differently than you and me. I will see what I can do about it, but I’m not promising anything. Now, why don’t you go to your room and rest? I believe you have classes at eight tomorrow, don’t you?”

“Yes, I do. Goodnight, Daddy.” She kissed Hershel on the cheek and then went up to her room, feeling as if she’d failed Daryl miserably, even though it was his idea to tell her parents the truth.

Making her brain shut off the unwelcome thoughts on this particular night was an even bigger problem than not letting it show how much she cared about her parents’ opinion of Daryl.

The man didn’t send her any messages since she left his driveway, and Beth wasn’t really surprised by this. He had sounded like he was on the verge of sleep when she was saying goodnight for the second time that evening. Still, Beth wished she could call him or at least write to him about what transpired—perhaps to say sorry for making her mother’s aversion to him an even bigger issue. Daryl would say that it didn’t matter, but Beth knew better than to believe those words. He cared about what other people thought of him, no matter how much he insisted that he didn’t.

Yeah, right, ‘cause it’s so damn pleasant to kiss some old dirty redneck trash…

Beth could still hear his voice in her head just as clearly as if he’d just said it a minute ago. It pained her greatly to think about all the resentment and self-hatred hidden in those words. Beth didn’t have to be a mind reader to be sure that he was not only repeating something that people said to him on countless occasions but also voicing his own thoughts on himself.

It was on that night that Beth decided to try and change the way Daryl Dixon felt about himself. She couldn’t let him hurt himself like this—not when he deserved so much better.

With this resolve being made, Beth finally managed to fall asleep.

*

Daryl woke up with a start, the bang of slamming cabinets making his head throb.

“Rise and shine, sunshine,” Merle barked a laugh, seeing the grimace on Daryl’s face, the sound making Daryl wince in pain. There was a disgusting aftertaste in his mouth—a mix of alcohol and chain-smoked cigarettes—and his back hurt from sleeping on that old, creaky sofa. But as he squeezed his eyes shut again, the world tilting on its axis around him and the memories from last night resurfacing, hitting him square in the chest, Daryl realized that his aching body was the least of his problems.

A sorrowful whine escaped him as his mind attacked him with details of his evening activities. Hiding his face in his hands didn’t stop the images of Beth Greene pushing herself onto his lap, kissing him, whimpering at the smallest of touches, from flooding his mind’s eye. He could swear he could still feel her delicate skin on his fingertips, the press of her warm, sweet lips on his, the heat of her as they deepened the kiss, as she pressed herself into him slowly, her heated eyes locked onto his, compelling him.

“Fuck,” he breathed out.

Daryl couldn’t believe himself. He knew that drowning his guilt and self-hatred in a drink wasn’t the best of his ideas, knew that things liked to get out of hand when he got himself drunk and miserable, but this? He’d never done anything quite as stupid as this. The fact that he let her kiss him when she was high, that he ever thought about her in that non-platonic way, that he enjoyed her touch just a tad too much for it to be innocent—that was bad enough. Kissing her? Touching her? Feeling the sweet heat of her through his jeans?

No. No, no, no.

That wasn’t going to happen. That couldn’t have happened.

Daryl sat up, too fidgety to stay still any longer, panic building in his chest. He fought through dizziness, but the moment he stood up, pain shot through his foot, making him drop right back onto the couch.

“Must’ve been one helluva party,” Merle commented from where he was leaning against the counter, slowly sipping his coffee and scrutinizing Daryl. “Shoulda said somethin’. I’d join.”

Merle didn’t know then. Good. Daryl wasn’t sure what time his brother got home yesterday. Wasn’t even sure what time Beth left or how long she stayed here. All he knew was that he did something he wasn’t supposed to. Something he claimed vigorously he didn’t want to do no longer than a few days prior. This was bad. This was really, really bad.

Daryl took in his surroundings, trying to calm his pounding heart down, failing not to think about all the things Beth told him the evening before.
I was waiting for you, ringing in his ears, followed by I really like you, you know that, right?

She’d lost her goddamn mind, that’s what he knew.

What business did an upright, amiable girl like her have liking someone like him? Her being sympathetic and compassionate, always making sure that he was alright, was already too much, already making him antsy. But having her say that she wanted to kiss him? Daryl had to hold back a pathetic whine at the thought.

This must have been some cruel, inappropriate joke. It couldn’t have been true, that’s for sure. She must have hit her head last Friday, must have lost her marbles somewhere along the way, lost a bet to a friend. That, or he was the one losing it, his brain putting words in her mouth, conjuring images to justify his awful behavior.

And even if she really said all that out of some strange conviction, if she really thought all that, what could she possibly know about these things? She was barely even eighteen, and the only other experience she had with guys was some high school jerk who tried to pressure her into having sex. Something she didn’t want, Daryl remembered. And now he put his own dirty hands on her—not much better than that asshole she dated.

“Lookin’ for that?” His brother pulled his attention away from his internal panic. Daryl squinted at him, ashamed by how long it took him to recognize his own phone in his brother’s hand. Merle smirked before throwing the device at him. Daryl managed to catch it right before it hit him in the face.

“Thanks,” he murmured, looking down at his screen. He realized he was holding his breath only when it was pushed out of his lungs at the sight of Beth’s name and two unopened messages from her.

Another stray bit of their conversation resurfaced in his mind, making him squeeze his eyes shut, shame pulling at his heart. It’s okay, Daryl. You can touch me if you want, she’d said, so full of trust, as if the idea that he could abuse this permission, take it too far, never crossed her mind. Pain sobered him up a little at that point, but he was still drunk, still not fully in control of himself, and there she was, putting herself in his hands. As if it was really okay. As if the notion of his calloused fingers on her delicate, light skin wasn’t as atrocious to her as it should be.

He sighed, opening his eyes to look at her messages.

08:46 AM Beth
Hi! How are you feeling?

09:02 AM Beth
And how is your foot? Are you going to have it checked?

Daryl swallowed audibly, raising his eyes to yet again be met with his brother’s smirk.

“Anything good?” Merle asked, wiggling his eyebrows at him as if he knew exactly who was writing to him. Who was he kidding, Daryl thought—the bastard definitely took a peek at his phone when he was still unconscious, like always, putting his nose in Daryl’s business against his will.

Daryl gave a slight shake of his head, hoping it would be enough to deter his brother. He switched the screen off and dropped the phone onto the couch before making another attempt at standing up.

“Stomped on some glass shards yesterday,” he said by way of explanation to Merle’s surprised look.

“Ugh, sounds fun. Sorry to tell ya, but walkin’s gonna be a bitch for you the next few days.”

Daryl winced when he accidentally put too much pressure on the injured foot. It was a fitting punishment from the universe, Daryl thought. He first met Beth when she injured her foot—just an innocent little girl in need of help—and now he had his own foot as a reminder of his disgusting, perverted actions. No matter what she said she wanted, he should have known better. She was just a naive young girl who didn’t know what the real world looked like, raised in a bubble created by her family, and he took advantage. Fuck, he really did, didn’t he?

“Yeah, don’t I know it,” he mumbled, grimacing at his own thoughts.

He still couldn’t shake the images of their heated kisses out of his mind—the ghost of her fingers in his hair, on his face, her slender thumb brushing his lips, haunting him. Daryl had never thought himself to be that kind of guy, but all it took was one girl giving him an opportunity to prove that, in fact, he was. He looked down on Santucci and Merle last Friday when they were getting their rocks off with some drunken women they’d met at a bar, but he wasn’t much better, was he? Perhaps worse even, putting Beth in this kind of situation, where she had to haul his drunk ass home, shouting at her in the middle of the streets, putting the blame for his own twisted feelings on her, only to then use her kindness, her naivety to his own gain, and taint it with his disgusting desires.

Will Dixon would be proud.

“I bet it was all worth it, huh?” Merle snickered, his mean glint making tension return to Daryl’s bones. Did he know something he shouldn’t, after all? Merle didn’t say anything else on the subject, though, instead reaching behind himself and pushing another cup of coffee in Daryl’s direction as he slowly made his way to the counter. “Don’t say I never do anythin’ for you, baby bro.”

He nodded, grateful that Merle chose not to comment any further. Daryl was putting an entirely new meaning to feeling like a piece of shit all by himself—he didn’t need his brother to make it even worse. As he sipped his coffee, his eyes darted to the phone lying on the couch, in the exact spot where Beth had been sitting last night. What was he going to do with this mess? 

*

“Okay, that’s it. You’re telling us what’s going on,” Lily said, giving her a stubborn look. They were sitting under a big tree in the park near the school, where a lot of people liked to hang out after classes. Since it was Friday, and they were all finished with their lessons, they decided to sit down for a quick snack and a talk. Beth wasn’t surprised by the intervention—not after she hadn’t answered any of their calls the day before, and not after she’d spent the better part of that day smiling to herself and staring off into the distance, wondering what Daryl was doing. The evening before felt like a dream. She kept thinking: I made out with Daryl Dixon. God, I really did.

Beth had no idea what that meant for their relationship. Was she his girlfriend now? Would he want that? The idea made her feel all tingly and happy inside.

“Yeah, something is going on with you, Beth, and we’ve been patiently waiting for you to tell us, but enough is enough,” Amy chimed in, sitting down next to Beth and giving her a stern look as well.

Beth knew she should be anxious about their sudden interest, but she couldn’t bring herself to feel anything but excitement and happiness after last evening. She just hoped Amy and Lily wouldn’t rain on her parade, especially since they weren’t too in favor of her flaunting her ‘relationship’ with Daryl—and it wasn’t much of a relationship back then. Now she knew the taste of his lips; she knew how it felt to be touched by him, and this thing between them felt both bigger, more important, and, at the same time, more fragile. He hadn’t written her back either, and Beth couldn’t help but worry a little. Was he still sleeping it off? Did he even remember what happened between them?

“Start with who you were on the phone with yesterday,” Lily added, and Beth dropped her gaze to her shoes, looking for a way to tell them without making them panic.

“Come on, Beth. You know you can tell us anything, right? We’re your friends. Don’t you trust us?” Amy sounded almost sad, and that made Beth feel guilty.

She sighed.

“Promise not to freak out?”

She raised her pinky to them. Her friends exchanged worried glances, but then raised their pinkies as well and pushed them together with hers, creating a tangle of fingers.

“We promise,” Amy said, and Lily nodded.

“It was Daryl Dixon.”

Amy gasped loudly, and Lily made a face.

“No, it wasn’t,” she said, and Beth snorted at her reaction. She took her phone out and showed them the phone call from Daryl in her call log.

“Yeah, it was,” she added, watching their eyes get bigger in shock.

“You have his number?!” Amy almost shouted, and Lily shushed her quickly when a few heads turned to look at them from afar. Amy smiled bashfully. “Sorry.”

“He gave me his number last Friday, after the party at the Bronze.”

“Oh, right, he was the one who rescued you from that creep. Gosh, I still can’t believe that guy was able to take you out right under our noses,” Amy said, scrunching her nose, while Lily looked away guiltily. They’d both been dancing when Beth got chatted up by the stranger. They only noticed her being gone when she was already outside, and by the time they got out to look for her outside of the club, Daryl had already driven away with her tucked safely in his truck. It wasn’t their fault, really, neither was it Beth's, and after a heated conversation, the three girls had apologized for all their mistakes and decided to let it go.

“Yeah, he was, but… umm… the thing about Daryl is… I keep meeting him, you know?” She tried to make it sound as innocent as she could, not wanting them to draw any wrong conclusions.

“What do you mean by that?” Lily scrunched her eyebrows, looking at her again.

“I mean, well, you know how I babysit Carl and Judith sometimes?” They both nodded and made affirmative grunts. “A few months ago, Daryl came over to see Rick when I was there. He was very perturbed, so I let him in and—”

“You let him in?!” Amy squeaked silently. “When you were alone in the house?!”

Beth blushed heavily and averted her eyes from her friend.

“I wasn’t really alone. The kids were there too, and that’s not even important. He’s not the way this town makes him out to be. He’s a good man, Amy.”

“You keep saying that, but how on earth do you know that?” Lily asked, sounding suspicious.

“He works on the farm sometimes, and I talked to him after he helped me out on the night of Sophia’s… you know.”

“Yeah, I somehow doubt that’s all. What are you not telling us, Beth?” Lily was apparently set on getting to the bottom of things. Beth looked up at her and was met with a worried expression on her friend’s face. She should probably keep lying. But Beth hated lying, and she’d had to lie a lot lately. It was making her feel antsy. And they were her friends too. Perhaps it was time to come clean after all?

“Well, I… I lied to you, okay?” Beth watched Amy open her eyes even wider in shock. Lily, though, gave her an unimpressed look. Beth swallowed audibly and continued. “After that party at Jimmy’s, I didn’t really go home. I wanted to, but I walked right into some drunk assholes, and I don’t know how that would’ve ended for me if it wasn’t for Daryl showing up.”

Amy gasped again, and Lily’s look turned from unimpressed to invested. When neither of them asked any follow-up questions, Beth said:

“He got rid of those men, and then got quite angry at me for wandering around at night like that. He wanted to take me home, but I knew if I showed up too quickly, I’d get in trouble, and, um, he offered to take me to his place instead.”

“What?!” Amy shouted again. Luckily, this time nobody turned their attention to them.

“Please, tell me you said no and kept walking,” Lily pleaded with her. Beth pursed her lips in answer.

“No, you didn’t go with him! Why didn’t you let him take you home at least? You could have slept in a barn, still, like you told us?!” Lily was getting more and more alarmed with what Beth was sharing with them. 

“I could’ve, yeah, but… umm… I don’t know. I guess I was just tired, and it was raining, so I was wet, and I knew I’d get cold if I slept in the barn in wet clothes, and… umm… I honestly have no idea what my reasoning was, but I went with him. And I know it was stupid and dangerous. Believe me, he gave me shit about it in the morning, but he was also very respectful. He gave me clothes to sleep in and let me sleep in his bed…”

Amy gasped, outraged, so Beth gave her a pointed look.

“While he slept in another room, Amy.”

“So, he didn’t, like, do anything?” Lily wanted to know, a grimace of barely hidden disgust appearing on her face. Oh boy, she will not take it well when Beth tells her that she made out with him, will she? 

“No. He told me off for agreeing to go with him and for wandering alone at night like that, but overall, he was very nice. He even gave me a ride to Jimmy’s and then back home, but you already know that part.”

“You’re insane, Beth. Do you have any idea what could’ve happened? What if he did want to hurt you?” Amy seemed panicked.

“I know, I know, but he didn’t, okay? And he actually saved me again a few days ago, so you see, he really is a good man.”

“Right,” Lily agreed, but something in her tone told Beth that she was still skeptical. “And yesterday? What did he want? And why didn’t you answer your phone later?”

Beth blushed at the last question, butterflies raiding her tummy at once at the vivid memory of their kisses. He’d been so gentle, so unsure, afraid of touching her. It was almost endearing. And then, once he did touch her, kiss her, it had been so intense and passionate, it was making her feel hot even now.

Beth took a deep breath and said:

“He got drunk and wanted to tell me that I shouldn’t come to see him anymore.”

The silence that fell upon their little group was almost deafening. Beth watched her friends’ confused expressions for a moment longer before she added:

“And he said that because after he rescued me from that creep on Friday, I kissed him.”

Amy’s mouth fell open, and she covered it with her hand to suppress the squeaky sound she made.

“You what?!” Lily’s voice raised to an octave Beth hadn’t thought possible.

Beth blushed, but she couldn’t help but smile too.

“I kissed him,” she repeated, and a giggle escaped her as she added for good measure: “I kissed Daryl Dixon. Can you believe it?”

“No, I can’t. What the hell, Beth?!” Lily didn’t sound happy. Amy was still in too much shock to join the conversation, and maybe for the better. Beth wasn’t sure she could deal with both of them attacking her at the same time.

“I’ve never felt like that before, Lily. Not with Jimmy, not with anyone else. It’s… so thrilling and painful at the same time. It’s like he’s all that I can think about. I think I really like him, Lily. Like like him.”

“You can’t be serious. Amy, are you hearing this?!” Amy nodded. She managed to close her mouth, but she still watched Beth as if she were an alien. Seeing that she wasn’t going to get any help from Amy, Lily went back to berating Beth:

“You do know who he is, right, Beth? Even if he didn’t kill that poor girl, he’s in a gang, and he’s old and creepy, and…”

“He’s not creepy. He’s actually pretty sweet. If you’d just stop demonizing him, you’d see…”

“See what? He’s a dangerous man, Beth. How can you not see that? I just… I can’t believe you! Amy, aren’t you going to say something?” Amy shook her head, apparently still too stunned to talk, and Lily huffed an annoyed breath. “I can’t believe you did that, and you lied to us about this for such a long time too. I’m sorry, but I just… I can’t keep talking about it right now.” And with that, Lily got up and stormed away, her earlier promise not to freak out forgotten.

“Lily, wait!” Beth tried calling after her, but to no avail. Lily was already running through the park to her car parked in front of the school. Beth sighed and turned to Amy. Her other friend gave her a sympathetic smile.

“Sorry. I probably should’ve said something, but I think I needed a minute to process all this.”

“It’s alright, Amy,” Beth said, resigned. “Just shout at me already so we can be over it.”

Amy scrunched her eyebrows. She still looked quite shocked, but there was no disgust or anger evident on her face.

“I’m not gonna shout at you. You know I don’t believe in those rumors about Dixon either, and I actually think he might be a good guy. I mean, he did save you, what, three times now? It’s the other thing that I find shocking.”

“What other thing?”

“You liking him? Like that? It’s just… it’s you.” Amy chuckled while saying that, and Beth allowed herself a glimmer of hope for acceptance.
“What do you mean by that?”

"I mean, you’re a goody two-shoes, Bethy. No, don’t make that face. I don’t mean it in the wrong way. It’s just that you’re the kind of girl that always does what she’s told. You go to church every Sunday, have the best grades, don’t drink or smoke. You didn’t speak to me for a week when you caught me with Chris Mullaney…”

“Ugh, but he was such a jerk!”

“Yeah, sure he was—that was the best part about him! He was a bad boy, Beth. Older, wearing a leather jacket, smoking… He was cool, you know. But you hated him for it!”

“Hang on, I hated him for being a jerk, not for his doubtful wardrobe choices or…” Beth tried interjecting, but Amy didn’t let her.

“And here you are telling me—us—that you have been meeting… no, more than that, that you have a raging crush on one of the most feared people in this town? On the guy who would be a walking definition of a bad boy if he was still a boy? That’s just insane, Beth! And I mean, I could tell you liked him, but you liking him that way, you kissing him? Just... wow!”

Beth looked down, blushing again. She had nothing to say to that because Amy was quite right. She always hated those bad-boy types, didn’t know what people saw in them. And she could argue that Daryl was different, that he was nothing like Chris Mullaney, but wouldn’t that be a bit of a lie? Daryl could be a jerk if he wanted to. He angered easily and picked fights when he felt threatened. He’d called her names a few times too. And still, she’d jumped at the first opportunity to kiss him.

Still, she felt herself liking him more and more with every interaction they had.

Still, she wanted to be his girl.

So instead of arguing, she went for a quiet admission:

“I know, Amy. I just… can’t help it. There are so many things about him that I just simply adore, and no matter what I do, I can’t stop thinking about him. And I know that he’s not perfect. He can be coarse and unrefined at times, but I know he has a good heart. Life hasn’t been easy on him, you know, and I just feel this need to make it better, you know? To make him smile. To show him that there is good in other people too.”

Amy whistled in response to that.

“Girl, you got it bad for him, don’t you?”

“You have no idea! And it’s been eating at me that I couldn’t tell you all that, but you saw how Lily reacted. I didn’t want to fight with you and…”

“And you didn’t want to stop seeing him either?” Amy asked as if reading her mind. Beth nodded, feeling just a tad guilty about it. Amy shook her head, clearly amused. “I just can’t believe it. You really kissed him?”

Beth blushed crimson.

“I did.” She raised her eyes to look at Amy. “I don’t remember doing it after The Bronze, really, but um—I did it again yesterday, and oh my God, Amy, it felt so amazing, you know?”

“No way! You kissed him again?! Tell me, tell me everything!”

Beth took a huge breath to do just that, but as she opened her mouth to say it—to finally tell someone everything that she’d been hiding, to recall all that had happened between her and Daryl the evening before—a voice came from the other end of the yard.

“Hey, B!” Beth turned her head around and got up quickly at the sight of her sister. Maggie was walking up to her with a big smile on her face. Beth, forgetting everything about their conversation, got up and ran to her big sister.

“There you are! I’ve been looking for you everywhere after your classes, lil’ sis. Did you forget I was coming in today?”

“No, not at all. I just thought you’d be busy, you know, with your man and all.” Beth snickered when Maggie gave her a gentle shove.

“Stop being mean about it. It’s enough that Daddy is being his usual know-it-all self.”

“So, where is that mysterious man that stole your heart?” Beth looked around Maggie but didn’t see anyone. Maggie snorted in response.

“Obviously, not here.” Maggie glanced at Amy, who walked up to them from their spot under the tree. “Hi, Amy! How are you doing?”

“Hi, Maggs. Just great! I’ll be going, though. You girls have fun, and I’ll call you later, alright, Beth? You know, to finish our little talk.” Amy winked, and Beth blushed heavily.

“Sure,” she said through gritted teeth, glaring at her friend for mentioning their conversation in front of her sister. Amy laughed in response, said her goodbyes, and rushed to school to get Thomas.

When Beth turned around to her sister, Maggie was giving her a weird look but didn’t comment and instead rushed her to the car.

“Come on then. Glenn is meeting some friend of his that lives here. We’ll go pick him up and go back to ours for dinner. How does that sound?”

“Perfect. That way I’ll be able to pass my judgment on your boyfriend before anyone else.” Beth showed Maggie her teeth in a smile, and Maggie sniggered.

“Sure you will.” Maggie sounded suspiciously cool about it, and Beth got to learn why when just a few seconds later her sister added in the most innocent tone of voice she could muster: “I heard your boyfriend is also coming to dinner this weekend.”

Now, Maggie knew about Daryl rescuing her twice now—once when her foot caught in that snare, and second when some creep wanted to kidnap her. Maggie also knew that Beth was very verbal about her sympathy for him, defending him from anyone any chance she got. So the fact that she joked about it shouldn’t be alarming at all, but with the memory of their make-out session still fresh in her mind, Beth couldn’t help but turn into a spluttering mess the moment she heard the words.

“What… what do you mean? Boyfriend? Ha! What boyfriend? Ha ha. I don’t… What…” Beth stopped talking when Maggie turned around to give her an incredulous look. Maggie watched her turn a bright shade of pink without a word and Beth couldn’t stand it. “Not a very good joke, I mean…”

“It’s not, huh?” 

“No. And I do not appreciate you laughing at Daryl”

Maggie snorted in return and went to open the truck’s door.

“I wasn’t laughing at him. I was laughing at you and your creepy school girl crush on him.”

“I don’t…” But Maggie already shut the door and couldn’t hear her. Beth quickly opened the door on the passenger’s side and jumped in the car. Once she was in, she looked at her sister with a deadly serious expression. “I don’t have a crush on him. No crush. Nada. You hear me, Maggs?”

Maggie turned the engine on.

“Sure, you don’t.” She made a face that told Beth that she didn't believe her. Oh no, that was bad. This couldn't be happening. 

“No. I’m serious. This is not funny.”

Beth glanced at her hands, trying to keep her body in check, stop it from shaking with nerves.

“It actually kind of is. You know that everyone knows about it, right?”

“What?!” Beth felt mortified. “What do you mean everyone knows… what…?”

Maggie looked over at her and scrunched her eyebrows seeing her so worked up about it.

“Relax. I don't think he knows." Oh, he definitely knew now, Beth thought, warmth spreading inside her. "But you are pretty obvious about it, B. To me at least. And to Dad too.”

“T-to Dad?” 

Was she even worse at lying than she thought? Could it really be possible that she already alarmed everyone from her family that she was crushing hard on Daryl Dixon?

“Yeah, well. You wore my dress and put make up on just to see him. You really thought you were being sneaky?”

Oh.

“Who… who told you that?” It was a stupid question, but she couldn't help herself. She had to make sure. Hear it with her own ears. Because her Dad couldn't have known. It didn't make any sense for him to know. 

Maggie gave her a funny look.

“Who do you think? Dad! Right before he told me I wasn’t sneaky either and that I should already ask him if I could bring my boyfriend home this weekend.”

Beth took a minute to digest that information. So that’s what the look her Dad gave her was about? He realized she had a crush on Daryl? But if he did, then why on Earth was he so accepting about it? He even let her go and see him alone right after!

“What else did Dad tell you? Was he mad?”

“Mad? No. Why would he be mad?”

“You know, about me having a crush on a dangerous, much older biker?”

Maggie, honest to God, laughed at this. And normally Beth wouldn’t mind, but she was seriously worried about her Dad finding out that she let that crush win over rationality and kissed the man that half the town thought to be a murderer and a rapist.

“It’s just a stupid crush, B. You’ll get over it in a few weeks. And really, it’s a bit cliché too. Crushing on an older bad boy who saved you from danger. Who could blame you, right? I mean, mom could and she will if she realizes that’s what you’re doing, so be careful about that, but Dad knows silly crushes that don’t last more than a few weeks are just a part of growing up. And he also knows you would never do anything about it, so what’s the harm?”

What’s the harm indeed?

Except she did do something about it. 

Except she wanted to do more about it. 

Except, she didn’t think that crush was going away any time soon. 

She really wanted to be Daryl’s girlfriend. To get to hold his hand the way she already did a few times. To spend time with him without looking for an excuse. To get to know him even more. To joke and laugh with him. To touch and kiss him again, and again, and again…

“How can he possibly know that?” Beth asked, perhaps naively. Maggie didn’t seem to mind though. She shrugged in response and said simply:

“You’re not me. You’re too responsible to do anything stupid, B. That, and I’m sorry to say, but you don’t have one rebellious bone in your body.”

Beth almost laughed. Too responsible, huh? Not one rebellious bone? If only Maggie knew what Beth was up to in the last few weeks, months even, perhaps she wouldn’t be so sure about that. Lying to go to a party. Riding bikes with older bikers at night. Spending the night at their place. Going to a night club just for the rare possibility of meeting that older, dangerous guy she was crushing on. Kissing that guy in his living room after getting his drunk ass home…

No, Beth didn’t think she could say she was a good girl anymore. But maybe that was alright too. Maybe it was just a part of growing up too. And maybe she liked this new Beth if it meant that she could keep kissing Daryl Dixon.

The ping of her phone brought her attention back to reality and when Beth looked down to check the message, a familiar thrill went through her body. She blushed, glancing at Maggie, who was thankfully focused on the road ahead, before reading the text. 

04:21 PM Daryl

We’ve gotta talk. Sunday after dinner?

Chapter 15: Pretendin' to be someone I ain't

Summary:

A family dinner, some unexpected tension, and a few things left unsaid - looks like there's more on the menu than just dinner. Some feelings are just too strong to hide...

Notes:

Turns out I lied, here is another chapter for you <3
Thank you for all the love under the last one - as always, you make me want to keep going and updating this story as often as possible.
Hope you're all having a great weekend <3

EDIT1: I just noticed - it's chapter 15, which means we're at the midpoint - crazy, huh?

***

Glenn turned out to be nothing like all the other boyfriends that Maggie introduced them to, and Beth had a hard time believing that this was who her sister chose to fall in love with. But there was no mistaking the glassy, happy look that Maggie shared with Glenn from time to time over the dinner. There was no mistaking the soft voice in which Maggie spoke to him and the loud laughter that would erupt from her any time Glenn said or did something even remotely funny. He was a dork, and Maggie hated dorks, but here she was, giggling and blushing at each and every cheesy line that fell from Glenn’s mouth. 

He was clearly entranced by her too, judging by the shy, soft smiles and the gooey look he would send her every time she laughed. Not one of Maggie’s ex-boyfriends was as attentive and caring towards her as Glenn proved to be just in the first few hours of his visit to the Greene’s farm. 

He was quiet at first, nervous about meeting them all, clearly set on making a good impression and trying way too hard for it to go well. He tripped over his own feet when he went to shake Dad’s hand, then, when asked about what he did in life, he got flustered, and his nervous gesticulating ended with him spilling his lemonade all over the table and Maggie’s shirt. 

When he grabbed the kitchen towels and started frantically swiping them all over Maggie’s boobs, that’s when Maggie laughed for the first time since they came in. And soon enough, everyone was laughing, and the awkward nervous energy pretty much dissipated after that.

Beth knew from their conversation in the car that Glenn was especially stressed out about the subject of his job and studies coming up. He had just dropped out and had no idea what to do next. He was delivering pizzas in Atlanta and didn’t have much else to look forward to, something he feared would make him less deserving of Hershel’s approval. Little did he know that him being a genuinely good, kind-hearted person who showed respect to those around him and cared for Maggie would win him Hershel’s approval before any prestigious college or job would.

By the end of the Friday dinner, Glenn joked around with Shawn freely, shyly held Maggie’s hand over the table, ventured excitedly into a conversation about baking and cooking with Annette, had a very polite and shy discussion about his view on life on the farm and in the city with Hershel, and made Beth giggle at his goofiness quite a lot. 

And later that night, when Beth was getting some water before bed and caught Maggie sneaking into the guest room in which Glenn was staying, against his loud complaints that she would get him in trouble, the girl couldn’t help but smile. She ventured down into the kitchen still wearing that smile, thinking that poor Glenn had no idea what he was signing up for dating the menace that was Maggie Greene.

The thought of dating pulled her mind back to Daryl, and she glanced at her phone to read through the string of messages they'd exchanged after he finally wrote her back. Rereading his words was making her shake in excitement, the thought of going off somewhere with him after dinner both thrilling and terrifying.

4:25 Beth
Sure. At yours?

The message sounded chill and unbothered, but she was shaking when she was typing the words in.

4:43 Daryl
Yeah, just come to my place after.

4:45 Daryl
You alright? Your folks ain’t mad at ya?

Beth smiled, her heartbeat picking up pace at the idea of spending another evening at his place. He asked about her parents, wanted to talk; that could only mean he remembered what happened, right? That he maybe wanted for this thing between them to continue?

4:46 PM Beth
I asked you first * kissy face emoji*

She wasn’t sure what possessed her to add that at the end, but she blushed heavily doing so. It was a good thing that by that time she was alone in her room, seemingly getting ready for dinner. Nobody could see her as she giggled to herself, butterflies wreaking havoc in her tummy. 

He took his time writing her back this time, and Beth had to go to dinner. They had this tradition of not bringing their phones down when they went to eat together, so Beth had to leave it in her room. She was fidgeting all through dinner, Glenn and Maggie’s antics only enhancing her desire to get back to Daryl.

Now Beth smiled, rereading their convo.

5:01 PM Daryl
I’m fine foot ain’t fine ain’t gonna go have it checked

5:34 Beth
I’m fine mom and dad were mad but it’s all good now

5:36 Daryl
You makin fun of me girl?

5:38 Beth
And what if I am?

She was so far in her head, she managed to fill her glass with water without noticing someone else there—not until he spoke:

“Cool, huh?”

She jerked forward, the water spilling over the glass right into the sink. She barely managed to catch her phone in time before it hit the counter.

“Shawn!” Beth shouted at him in a hushed tone, turning around to the boy sitting in the dark kitchen on the windowsill and looking out at their backyard. What was it with people sitting in the dark lately? “You scared me. What are you even doing here?”

“Sorry.” The boy didn’t look away from the window. Beth scrunched her eyebrows. She rarely saw Shawn looking so serious.

“I went down to get some tea and stayed a bit. Couldn’t sleep, you know?”

“Is… everything alright?”

Shawn shrugged.

“Yeah, I guess. I was just thinking about Maggie and Glenn.” Shawn still wouldn’t look at her. It was a bit worrying. Usually, he was pretty straightforward and quick to fill everyone in on what he was thinking.

“What about them?” Beth hauled herself up on the countertop, only once letting herself glance back at the phone. Daryl still didn’t write her back after that last teasing remark from her, and she was worried she had taken it too far. Perhaps she should’ve tread more carefully, waited to hear him out on Sunday first before starting to joke around like it was all alright. Like he hadn’t told her the night before that wanting to kiss her made him feel bad.

She looked back to Shawn just in time to see him shrug again.

“It’s just cool, I guess. That Maggie found someone nice, and… um… she could bring him home to meet everyone, and it was so… nice. Normal.”

Beth could tell the last word wasn’t what he originally wanted to say but had no idea how to call him out on that. What was he even on about? Since when did he care about Maggie’s boyfriends? His points sounded like something she might think, something she actually thought about when she was watching Maggie and Glenn before. Beth knew that even if Daryl wanted to explore this thing between them, it would mean hiding and sneaking around. She wouldn’t be able to invite him to dinner with her parents, not as an official boyfriend. It hurt to think about.

But why would it bother Shawn?

“It was. But… Shawn, what’s going on?”

Finally, Shawn looked away from the window and graced her with the saddest look she’d ever seen on his face. He tried to smile, but Beth saw the puffiness of his cheeks and eyes for what it was.

“Ah, don’t worry about it. It’s nothing. Just…”

“Shawn, I can see something is bothering you. You know, you could bring Chrissy sometime too. I’m sure Mom would stop bothering you about this internet dating if she could put a face to the name.”

She didn’t know why, but it seemed this was the wrong thing to say, as not a second later Shawn got up from the windowsill. The fake smile was still plastered on his face.

“Sure, lil’ sis. Come on, let’s go to sleep, yeah?”

Beth watched him for a moment longer as he went through the kitchen. It wasn’t until he reached the stairs that she got up as well. She couldn’t shake the sad look on his face from her mind for the next few hours. She tossed and turned on the bed, and when she finally fell into a restless slumber, she dreamt about the dinner they’d just had. But instead of Glenn, there was some older woman sitting next to Shawn and holding his hand, and the look on Hershel’s face wasn’t friendly at all. When Beth woke up, she quickly forgot the dream, but the uneasiness she felt lingered for the better part of her morning, filling her with frantic energy.

Her nerves got the best of her around noon.

11:42 AM Beth
Are you mad at me?

The answer came quickly, but it didn’t make her feel any less nervous.

11:43 AM Daryl
No

She hadn’t heard from Daryl since. She wanted to apologize, to say something, to make him open up, but every time she grabbed her phone to do so, a strong feeling of dread overwhelmed her, making it impossible to type anything sensible. The more time passed since they talked, the more she regretted not calling him on Friday when he failed to write her back.

She kept wondering if he was angry with her for kissing him when he was under the influence, or if he lied when he said he was fine. She kept imagining him telling her off for it the second they found themselves alone again. Going off on her for being so naive, for imagining that he could ever want a relationship with someone like her. She still remembered what he told Rick—that he would never go for a girl like her, not even if she was older—and she wondered now if he really believed that. What did he even mean by "a girl like her"? She wanted to know—no, needed to know—everything that was going on in his head.

Because, what if he woke up the next morning and decided that he really hated that she kissed him? What if he only wanted to meet at his place to repeat to her his hurtful words from Thursday? That she should just stop coming to see him, stop baking for him, stop kissing him against his will? She kept coming up with the most ridiculous scenarios, but she couldn’t help herself. People did all sorts of things they regretted later when they were drunk. What if that was one of them for Daryl?

What if he didn’t like her at all? He didn’t say it back when they were on the phone. Maybe because she hung up too soon, or maybe he simply didn’t feel that way about her. Doubt plagued her mind, and whenever she got a shot of courage to open a text message and type in a few words, more negative thoughts appeared out of nowhere to chase her away.

The worst thing was that she was unable to stop thinking about it. About him riding up to their house and greeting her whole family, about how it would feel to see him again after she’d learned the taste of his lips and the feel of his hands on her body.

On Sunday, the frantic energy only doubled and grew as the hours passed, making her fidget and struggle with everyday tasks. She dropped at least a dozen things that her mother asked her to take to their designated spots, walked right into the barn door when she was helping her dad, and burned herself on the stove when baking a cake for dessert. After that last offense, her mother sent her away, claiming that Maggie could help her out instead.

That’s how Beth ended up on the porch, looking out over the field and the street that Daryl would be coming from. She had her phone in her hand, yet again going through their texts. She was already dressed up—or dressed again after she spilled mayonnaise on the first dress she wore that day. She resolutely didn’t put on any makeup. She wouldn’t dare after Maggie called her out on it on Friday. But she did braid her hair nicely and put on one of the nicest dresses she owned, so she felt pretty good about herself.

The dress she had on was white, adorned with a pink flowery design, and Jimmy had always complimented her when she wore it, so she figured she must have looked really good in it. It was naive, she knew, counting on Daryl liking it too, but all she had left was hope.

First, she heard the loud rumble of the bike. Her heartbeat quickened, and she barely held herself back from getting up. Soon enough, the bike appeared on the horizon. Beth watched it come closer, teetering on the verge of panic. All of her doubts and worries hit her at once, and it was hard to imagine any scenario in which Daryl didn’t hate her for what she did.

Daryl pulled over right in front of their porch. He was wearing a black long-sleeved pullover and black jeans. No holes, no stains. But that wasn’t what piqued her interest. It was the way the clothes hugged his body, underlining his muscled arms and well-defined chest. She watched him shut the engine off—he hadn’t seen her yet—and swing one of his lean legs over the vehicle.

It was as if the events of Thursday night had put him in a new light. As if she could finally see him clearly, as if every part of him that she previously found attractive somehow became even better, which made him pretty much irresistible.

She ogled him openly, unable to stop herself from admiring his gorgeous body. Her eyes followed his every movement—from his legs, up to his chest and those criminally sexy arms, and up to his strong jaw and the scruff on his chin and above his upper lip that left her own lips burning. She took him all in, warmth and hunger spreading over her body quickly like a disease.

He took a few steps in the general direction of the house, limping slightly, keys dangling from his fingers, and then stopped abruptly. His sudden stillness broke her out of her spell. She snapped her eyes away from his lips and up to his blue eyes. The look he gave her left her breathless, and when she noticed him lowering his gaze to her dress for just a second before snapping his eyes back up, a pleasant shiver went through her body, making her feel giddy with excitement.

“Hi.” Her lips stretched into a warm smile as a breathy greeting left her mouth.

“Hi,” he rasped back, turning his face a little down and to the left, as if fighting some kind of reflex that made him want to turn around completely.

“How are you doing?” she asked before he could follow that instinct and run away from her.

“Good,” he answered simply and nodded a little for good measure. “You?”

Beth blushed, looking away for a second to brace herself, then back to his entrancing eyes. She chose honesty.

“I’ve been a little worried that you might hate me now.”

“Hate ya? Nah.”

Beth watched him step closer, not daring to breathe. He glanced at the house as if checking to see if they were truly alone, then added silently, only for her to hear, “Wouldn’t write you back if I did. I hate textin’.”

“Yeah?” Beth smiled up at him and didn’t hesitate to take his hand when he came closer and offered to help her get up. She rose to her feet, trying and failing to read his face. Was he as happy to see her as she was to see him? Did he also dream of kissing her again? Please, let it be so…

“Mhm,” he grunted, dropping her hand. Even as he turned to the side, his eyes still traced her face, unsure and full of emotion. She waited for him to say something else, to address their little secretive thing, but instead, after watching her for another moment, he turned away entirely.

Beth could swear her heart skipped a beat. She was already opening her mouth to say something—anything to dissolve the tension that overcame her—when her father spoke somewhere behind her:

“Daryl, it’s good to see you. How have you been?”

Beth turned around, surprised to see someone else standing on the porch. When did her father come out of the house? She side-eyed Daryl, but the man only nodded and said his greetings.

When they went inside, Beth watched Daryl follow her dad, and just like her mother said, he never looked as out of his element as when he stood in their dining room, anticipating dinner. Her mom was still in the kitchen, and Shawn was nowhere in sight, so Dad went to find him, leaving Daryl and Beth with Maggie and Glenn, who were preparing the table. This time Glenn didn’t trip over his own feet when he reached out to shake hands, but he stammered visibly, his eyes wide and mouth moving out of its own volition. Maggie sniggered behind his back, and when he finally took a step back, still suspiciously struck by Daryl’s appearance,

Maggie threw her hands around Glenn’s shoulders and said in a mock whisper:

“Relax. He’s not one of them.”

“One of whom?” Daryl and Beth asked almost in unison. They glanced at each other shortly, but Beth quickly averted her eyes, not wanting Maggie to catch on to anything. Maggie’s words from the car were still fresh in Beth’s mind. She had to be on her best behavior that day to not clue anyone in on the fact that she kissed Daryl.

“One of my exes. Shawn made a point of telling Glenn every single horrifying story of my dating life he could recall last night, which of course included dating a biker that we won’t mention in front of Dad.” Maggie raised her finger at Beth as if she would ever talk about that in front of their father. Not before, and especially not now, when she was hoping for a rough biker kind of romance for herself as well. Not that Beth knew much about Maggie’s brief relationship with the Feral Angels member. She didn’t even quite remember which one it was, only that it lasted a few months and ended abruptly when Maggie found out that he had a wife and a child, a knowledge he didn’t feel like sharing with her. Maggie was twenty at the time, but when Dad found out about it—and he did in the worst manner possible, when the guy’s wife came to their house looking for Beth’s sister, her three-year-old in arms—Hershel was furious. He made the whole situation go away but told Maggie he never wants to hear about it again, that she’s not going to see that man again.

“Which one was that again?” Beth asked before she could stop herself, and Maggie shot her a warning look.

“Beth! I said we are not going to—” Maggie started and stopped a moment later when Daryl spoke, his face turned a little towards Beth.

“Johnny Teller. His wife was a nutjob.” Maggie opened her mouth and closed it again as if she didn’t really know what to say.

Beth shrugged.

“But he was one too, right?” she asked and smiled, noticing a slight shaky movement of Daryl’s lips. “Maggs told me he once drove his bike off a cliff for a bet.”

His eyes found hers, and Beth blushed again under his gaze, her own eyes swapping across his face, taking him in. She was still astonished by the fact that she had her lips on his, her fingers tangled in his hair, that she had his hands on her as well.

“Yeah, was worse than her. Fuckin’ mental.” Daryl’s lips twitched as if he was trying to hold back a smile. His eyes were warm on her face, and Beth was getting lost in them against all reason, yet again forgetting that they weren’t alone in the room. “Merle loved to tease him, ‘cause he would do the most ridiculous shit just to prove a point. Loved to have a chick on the side too, or five.”

Beth giggled and then gulped when, a moment later, she chanced a glance at Maggie and found her scrutinizing her.

“Must have been driving her mad,” Glenn interjected, his words bringing them back to reality somehow, making them both turn away from each other. He sputtered under the sudden attention. “The wife, I mean.”

“Mhm, so much, she snapped and had him stabbed a year or so ago,” Daryl said dryly.

“What?” Maggie huffed a surprised breath, but before she could ask if that meant Johnny wasn’t in this world anymore, Shawn, Annette, and Hershel entered the dining room. Dinner was ready.

They all took their seats, with Hershel at the high end of the table, Annette on his right, and Maggie on his left. Shawn eyed Daryl with apprehension before sitting down next to their mom. Beth sat next to her brother, glancing at him questioningly, surprised by the grimace on his face. He just shook his head at her, and so Beth turned to Daryl. She’d love for him to sit next to her, but she supposed the seat he took, next to Glenn, was a safer choice. Beth smiled when Daryl almost instantly went for his fork and then put it down with a clunk when Hershel spoke, starting their routine.

“Today I’m grateful for this beautiful meal that my lovely wife and my son prepared for us. I’m also forever and immensely grateful that Daryl here stumbled upon our Beth at the right time, twice now, and both of those times helped her out of a tight spot. I don’t suppose there are any words that can express how grateful I am for that. Annette?”

Beth watched Daryl carefully, somehow aware that this was the first time he’s ever participated in a dinner like that. For them, it was a habit, a completely normal part of every dinner they’ve ever had since Beth remembered. For him, it must have been one of the most peculiar things.

“Thank you for sharing this sentiment with us, honey. I am grateful for the opportunity to have this dinner with you all. I’m grateful that even after all these years we can still gather like this. And I’m grateful for our guests as well. Shawn?”

After Shawn, it was Beth’s turn, and as she spoke, she tried and failed not to glance at Daryl. The biker looked as if he was seconds away from bolting out of their house, and Beth wanted to—no, had to—make sure that he knows it’s okay, that he doesn’t have to say much.

“I’m grateful that I can be here with you, having this dinner,” Beth said simply and nodded at Daryl encouragingly.

He cleared his throat.

“I’m grateful for that too,” he said, his eyes on hers, and when Beth smiled at him, he bit his cheek from the inside in the most adorable manner. 

When her father cleared his throat a moment later, Beth barely held back from jumping in her seat. She glanced at Hershel, only briefly, pretending not to notice the way he was watching her, all thoughtful, and then focused on the food.

The dinner went pretty well after that, for the most part. Hershel talked to Daryl about his work on the farm briefly, but then moved on to grilling Shawn about his unfinished chores, a subject from which Annette rescued Beth’s brother when she started talking about Beth’s future college, mostly addressing Glenn.

“We love that she’s got to choose the school with the best program, of course, but you know, the mother is also so happy that we get to keep her close at the same time. Especially that Maggie already attends college in Atlanta. We always thought it would be quite perfect to have them both so close. Especially, looking at how terrifying the world has gotten lately.”

Beth didn’t exactly like the way her mother managed to make the whole college thing about the family, as if it wasn’t Beth’s decision and Beth’s life. And the thing was, Beth has never been bothered by it before. She was always perceived as a little girl in need of help. One that had to be held by hand and led to the right path, and it was okay because she liked how involved they were in her life. She liked being gushed about. But in that moment, sitting across from Daryl, Beth felt a sudden pang of annoyance.

She made her decision about college because that’s what she had to do, but she wasn’t happy about it. Well, being with Maggie was a huge benefit of choosing Atlanta, and Lilly was going to be there too, after all. A good thing, even though they weren’t on exactly the best terms right at the moment. But she still felt a pang of sadness at the thought of other lost possibilities. She didn’t even think about it too much before doing what was expected of her. Just like Amy said, she was always pleasing others, and she wasn’t sure anymore: was she only fulfilling her parents’ wishes, or did she really want to stay in Georgia? Go to college? Become a nurse?

Her mother continued, completely unaware of Beth’s internal conflict. “I still can’t believe that such a horrible thing happened in our little community. Do you by any chance know if the investigation is going anywhere, Daryl?”

It was obvious why she was talking about Sophia. It was all her housewives’ circle talked about during their pottery and book clubs, but why on Earth did she choose to ask Daryl about the investigation was beyond Beth.

“No, ma’am. Nothin’ I know of,” Daryl said simply, his eyes cast down, a deep frown on his face. “But-um, I talked to Rick about that guy from the Bronze. He thinks it’s not related to Sophia’s case. Probably just some nutjob tryin’ his luck.”

“Ahh, that’s what I’m talking about! The world is just full of them awful people, isn’t it? What was that you told me about the girl from your campus, Maggie? The one from last year?” Annette went on, not noticing how much the subject upset their guest.

Beth wished she could reach out to him, hold his hand the way Maggie held onto Glenn so often. It struck her suddenly, the feeling that Shawn was referring to, this pang of regret at not being able to express her feelings freely. Not in front of anyone she knows, at least. Not the way Maggie had been doing with Glenn since they arrived at the house. And she didn’t even want to do anything romantic, just console him, touch his hand maybe. But she couldn’t, so instead, she watched him and hoped her smile was more reassuring than anything else, even if that consolation she wanted to give him was quickly replaced by a different type of ache.

The way he ate was downright sinful, she thought, eyeing his fingers digging into the chicken meat on his plate. He wasn’t using the knife with his fork, instead nibbling at the food with greasy fingers and then sucking on them obscenely afterward. Her mom tried not to look, disgust evident on her face and mirrored on Shawn’s, whereas her dad respectfully kept his eyes on his own plate, and Maggie smirked as she cast glances at Daryl throughout it all. Glenn didn’t even notice, too busy gazing at Maggie from the side. Beth was thankful nobody was paying her any attention at the moment as she herself had trouble taking her eyes away from the biker, heat spreading down her tummy, making her squeeze her legs under the table.

Beth only realized he wasn’t aware he was doing something wrong when halfway through it he caught her looking at him. Their eyes met, and Daryl stopped, his pointer finger in his mouth. His eyes swept across her face, and whatever he saw there made his gaze darken slightly, his cheeks coloring red. Beth squeezed her thighs again, gulping silently and doing everything in her power not to make a noise. God, all he had to do was look at her, and she was already squirming in her seat. He dropped his hand from his mouth and reached for a tissue next to his plate.

“See, Beth, that’s why it’s important to answer your phones and not stay out after dark,” her mom said next, apropos of some part of the conversation that Beth hadn’t tuned in for, and Beth felt a wave of shame wash over her at the mention of her Thursday activities. She chanced a glance at Daryl and saw him turning his head down as if he wanted to make himself smaller somehow. The implication must have not been lost on him either. “Especially with what happened the last time. I swear, it’s like you want me to have a heart attack lately.”

“I don’t do it on purpose, Mom,” she said, her voice barely above a whisper. She could argue that she was still doing better than Maggie at her age—not spending her nights away from home without informing them, not sleeping around with every guy that looked her way (not that they knew about that), not getting tattoos without telling them, and not coming home drunk every Saturday. Mentioning it would definitely turn the attention away from her, but with Glenn here, it would be mean and uncalled for. Beth glanced in her sister’s direction, yet again catching Glenn staring at her. Maggie wasn’t looking at him, though, her focus on Annette and annoyance evident in her eyes.

“Give her a break, Annette. She’s finishing high school in two weeks, got admitted to almost every college she applied to, and has outstanding results. Shouldn’t she be able to have some fun?”

“Fun? With a murderer and a rapist on the loose?” It was Shawn, who exclaimed suddenly, shocked by Maggie’s words.

“It might have been a one-time thing, Shawn. It’s not like he killed anyone else since January. Don’t you think you all are making a bigger deal out of it than it has to be?” At Maggie’s words, Annette bridled. Beth watched Daryl bite the inside of his cheek in a nervous tic.

Shawn snorted.
“Right. Try tellin’ that to the guy who wanted to take Beth for a ride. If there was any guy, that is.”

Beth gulped. The dirty look Shawn sent Daryl’s way could be interpreted in only one way.

“Shawn,” Hershel’s voice was calm but stern.

“If? Wha’ d’ ya mean by that?” Daryl’s voice caught on a dangerous note.

Shawn shrugged, completely unperturbed by the anger in the biker's voice. He was always like that, bratty in the worst possible way. Beth loved him, but sometimes he really didn’t know when to shut up—a tendency he got from their mother.

“Not like anyone can confirm your story, right?”

“Stop it, Shawn!” This time it was Beth’s turn to exclaim. She knew her brother didn’t agree with Daddy’s decision to invite Daryl for dinner, but if she had any idea that he would behave like that, she wouldn’t have pressed Hershel about it. The last thing she wanted was for Daryl to feel bad.

Now, she watched Daryl’s nostrils flare as he gritted his teeth, his hands forming fists next to his plate. Shawn was openly staring at Daryl, challenging him silently to do something—anything—that would prove his earlier point: that Daryl Dixon was not to be trusted. Beth would have never expected any of them to act like that toward a guest.

“That’s enough, son.” Hershel spoke before it could escalate any further. “You’ll apologize to our guest now, and that will be the end of it.”

Shawn’s lips formed a line. When he finally looked away from Daryl, who was fuming silently, it was to shoot an angry look at Hershel.

“What for? Asking questions y’all should be asking? He’s literally the only person that was questioned in that murder case, and here you are thanking him for following your daughter around.”

“Shawn,” this time it was Annette, who tried to interject, but to no avail. “Please…”

“Having him for dinner when he could well be the person who drugged her in the first place, like…”

The chair scraped loudly on the floor when Daryl got up. He was breathing heavily, his pupils dilated and gaze dark, full of anger. For a second, Beth thought he would launch himself at Shawn, the table between them damned.

“Didn’t drug no one,” he managed through gritted teeth. He sounded raw, even more rough than usual—almost like he sounded when they were sitting on his couch, but this time it wasn’t a nice sound at all. Beth expected him to go into a full-on rage rant after that, but instead, he stomped around the table, the chair falling behind him after all, and stormed off, deaf to Hershel’s voice calling him back.

Beth’s heart was in her throat when she got up too and ran after him, acting on an impulse.

“Daryl!” she shouted after him when she got to the porch. He was walking to his bike so fast she had to run after him to catch him in time. “Daryl, wait!”

She reached out, her hand meeting his forearm only for a second before he ripped his hand out of her embrace and turned around so quickly she almost collided with him.

“What do you want from me, girl?!” He threw his hand out, getting into her face in a way that would have most people back off instantly. She didn’t.

“I want you to listen to me for a minute, okay? Shawn’s an idiot. He doesn’t know what he’s saying.”

“Doesn’t he? Nah, you know what I think?! I think he’s only sayin’ what everyone else is thinkin’, alright?! Don’t know what I expected—was fuckin’ stupid, comin’ here, pretendin’ to be someone I ain’t, playin’ fuckin’ dress-up for y’all like some fuckin’ clown!”

“Stop it! It’s not like that!”

“And what do you know about that, huh? Treatin’ me like I’m some fuckin’ hero or like maybe I’m one of your dumb high school friends you can get drunk and dirty with. A fun little game of flirtin’ with a big bad biker, huh?!” He closed the small space between them, his face mere millimeters from hers when he spat: “Like it ain’t sick what I did to ya all the same! No matter if I was drunk outta my goddamned ass an’ you fuckin’ asked for it!” His voice broke at the last sentence, and Beth felt an overwhelming need to hug him, make all the wrong go away. She reached out to him on instinct.

“Daryl…”

“No.” He took a step back, throwing a finger at her. “I’m done listenin’ to you! Look, I ain’t some college motherfucker you can screw around with like it’s all a big game! I can’t… We're done here! This ain’t happenin’!”

She wanted to argue, but that was when the doors to the porch opened and closed with a loud bang. She looked back to see her dad stepping off the porch and heading in their direction. Her eyes caught on Maggie and Glenn in the window, and she wondered briefly how long they had been standing there and if she and Daryl were loud enough for them to hear anything.

“Daryl, please, wait a second.” A familiar rumble of the bike’s engine drowned out Hershel’s voice when he, just like her, tried to stop Daryl from leaving.

“Thanks for dinner!” Daryl shouted over the noise and drove off, leaving Beth heaving.

Notes:

Okay. I'm sorry they had a fight again, I really am, but it's not easy you know, giving in to your twisted desires. Nobody knows that better than Daryl XD.
Also, as you could probably tell, I really love Maggie and Glenn together - I don't ship them nearly as hard as Daryl and Beth, of course, but I really enjoyed their relationship on the show, so I needed them to be sweet and in love in this one too #sorrynotsorry ^^

Chapter 16: Tell me why do you care so much

Summary:

More Shouting, Family Talks, a Hunting Trip, and Secret Texts... The Aftermath of Dinner at Greene’s.

“What the hell is wrong with you?!” Beth stormed into the room, the door slamming against the wall with a loud bang. The sound echoed through the small house, drawing immediate attention. Shawn, who had been seated on the bed, flinched slightly but quickly masked it with a glare. Their mom, sitting stiffly beside him, turned her head sharply, and for a moment, she looked as though she’d seen Beth for the first time.

“Language, Beth!” she warned, her voice clipped, though the shock on her face didn’t subside.

Beth ignored her, her anger blazing past any concern for decorum. Her fists were clenched tightly at her sides, nails digging into her palms as she glared at her older brother.

“Daryl was our guest, and you had no right!” she spat, her words sharp and direct.

Shawn didn’t hesitate, rising to his feet with the kind of practiced ease that made it clear he’d been ready for a fight. Their mom reached out instinctively, her hand brushing his arm in an attempt to hold him back, but he shrugged her off.

“Yeah, I bet that’s what Sophia thought too,” he shot back, his voice dripping with sarcasm. “A guest. Gotta do no wrong by him, right?” His words cut deeper than she expected, the deliberate cruelty unmistakable.

Beth’s expression twisted, a mix of disbelief and disgust flooding her features.

“You’re insane!” she accused, her voice rising as she took a step closer.

“Am I? Really?” Shawn countered, his voice now tinged with an icy venom. He folded his arms across his chest, standing tall in a way that made the small room feel even smaller. “Or is it you that’s lost your mind thinking it’s okay to bake for that guy? To ride a bike with him? Even go home with him all alone?! He’s a thirty-something biker with a bad rep, Beth, and I’m the insane one?”

Beth’s breath hitched, but she didn’t back down. Her pulse was roaring in her ears, fueled by a blend of anger and indignation. “So you’re saying it’s my fault my foot got caught in that snare? My fault that I got drugged? Is that what you’re on, Shawn?!”

Shawn opened his mouth, ready to respond, when Hershel’s strong voice came from the door.
“Enough!” This time, he wasn’t calm, and both of them jumped a little at the tone, not used to Hershel raising his voice. Beth turned to her father just as Shawn went to protest. Hershel didn’t let him.
“I heard enough from you today, boy. No more. Bethy, can you please leave us alone?”

“But…”

“I want to talk to your brother alone. Please, go to your room. I’ll come talk to you when we’re done here.”

Not seeing any other options, Beth left the room, leaving Shawn with her mom and dad.

Tension was still drumming in her veins, her heartbeat quickened and cheeks warm when she got to her room and grabbed her phone. She found Daryl’s number and just looked at it for a long moment, wondering. Every cell in her body wanted to make that call. But what would she even tell him? That he was wrong? That they should give it a try? Date each other in secret? And what if that’s not what he wanted? What if that makeout session was only the result of him getting drunk?

No, she chastised herself. He told you he wanted to kiss you before, that it felt good when you kissed him on Friday. He wasn’t drunk then. But the desire to kiss someone, she reasoned with herself, and the desire to date them could be two completely different things.

He said she thought it was some big game, that he wasn’t some guy her age she could get drunk and make out with, as if he didn’t know her at all. As if he didn’t hear her when she told him she liked him. As if he didn’t know she would never play games like that. Her only crime was liking him a bit too much, wanting him in a way she’d never wanted anybody else, and she thought he must have liked her too for him to kiss her like he did.

Her finger hovered over the green button. She was almost ready to press it when the knock came. Beth quickly turned her screen off, expecting her dad to open the door. She let out a surprised yelp when she saw Maggie instead.

“Hi, you. Can I come in?”

“Sure.” Beth discarded her phone on the bedside cupboard and took a seat on the bed.

“So, that was intense, huh?” Maggie started, a little smile on her face as she joined Beth on the bed. Beth averted her eyes from her sister, all the frustration and anger leaving her body all at once. She took a deep breath and mumbled on the exhale:

“Yeah.” She looked down at her hands and let the silence envelop them. She wouldn’t know what to say to Maggie, and throughout the years, she’d learned that it’s better to let the older Greene lead the conversation anyway.

“Look, Shawn was way out of line. Like, something huge must have bit him in the ass this morning.”

Beth snorted at that, a small smile appearing on her face unbidden. She felt Maggie’s hand on her arm.

“Are you alright, B?”

Beth nodded, not trusting herself to look up, though. Was she?

Maggie was silent for another moment, and when she spoke, her voice took on the softest notes Beth had ever heard her use. It made Beth raise her head at last and gaze at her sister with surprise.

“I saw you from the window, you know? Before Daddy came out.” Maggie was watching her carefully. That was new too. “Saw the way Dixon shouted at you. Dad told us to stay put, but, God help me, for a second there I wanted to load Daddy’s shotgun and walk out. Are you sure you’re alright, B? What was he shouting at you for?”

Did it really look that bad? It didn’t feel like it when they were arguing. It felt mostly sad and awful, but not dangerous. The thought made her snort, and she yet again averted her eyes from her sister.

“Yeah, no, I’m fine. I don’t… Daryl doesn’t scare me, you know? Maybe I’m naive, stupid or something, like Shawn says, but I trust him. Is it stupid, Maggs?” She looked back at her sister and was met with another imploring look.

“I don’t know. There a reason you trust him that much? And before you say that he saved your foot and probably your life, I’m not asking about that. Tell me, why do you care so much? Why is he special enough to fight Shawn and Mom for it?”

A dangerous question. One that could lead to her spilling the whole truth to Maggie, and that was out of the question after what transpired tonight. If Maggie didn’t react well to it, hell would break loose. Irrevocably this time. But Maggie seemed genuinely interested, and for the first time in her life, Beth felt seen by her, really seen, not as a kid sister, but someone on the same level as her, and Beth didn’t want to taint this moment with lies.

She started carefully.

“I know it might be hard to believe, but he’s always so gentle with me. Whenever we meet, he’s rough and he can be mean, yeah, but not when it counts, not when it’s important, you know? And he’s honest, never pretending, not trying to appease others and meet their standards the way so many people I know do. He’s just so… real.” She chanced a glance at Maggie, and her cheeks reddened at the sight of a smile dancing on her sister’s lips. “I don’t know. It’s hard to explain really, but I feel like I could trust him with my life, you know? Like, at the end of the world, he would be the only sure thing, the last man standing between you and the darkness, or something.”

She laughed at her own words, feeling childish. Here Maggie was treating her like an adult, and Beth was botching it all up. Her sister didn't laugh at her though. Instead, she hugged her in response.

“You have such a good heart, B. It’s truly inspiring, you know?” she said, her tone serious. “But be careful, yeah? Daryl’s solid, but that doesn’t mean he’s harmless. Crushes like that are all exciting and fun, but don’t forget who he is, okay?”

Beth snorted playfully.

“Said the one who dated one of them Feral Angels.”

“Yeah, and look how that turned out. I mean, there are some things I’ve never told you about, things Johnny did, you know? I didn’t see them as something bad then. I was too into him, but now I get it. Us and them? We’re not cut from the same cloth.”

“You sound like Mom now.”

“Shut up,” Maggie shoved her playfully, and Beth hugged her again, not entirely agreeing with her, but grateful that someone noticed she needed consolation. She wasn’t going to take that advice, though. Her heart wouldn’t let her. So instead of being careful, instead of giving Daryl what he wanted, she decided to reach out yet again.

5:12 PM
Beth
Can we talk about it?

She wrote to him right after the doors closed shut behind Maggie, and when he didn’t respond, she tried calling him. He didn’t pick up, though, and she wasn’t brave enough to just go to him, his sharp words still fresh in her mind. Maybe there was some truth to it, to them being made from a different cloth. That was the only way Beth could explain to herself why he acted the way he did. Because how could he even say all that to her? How could he bring their relationship down to being just a dirty fumble? Was that how he saw it?

That night, long after the talk with Maggie and then with her father, Beth was lying in her bed thinking about all their interactions, about what she told her sister, and what Daryl said to her. It was nearing three in the morning when Beth reached for her phone yet again, her fingers dancing on the screen. She hit send before she could talk herself out of it.

*

A mess. He had made an even bigger mess out of things than before. Daryl knew it wasn’t fair, the way he shouted at her again. His hands shook as he tossed clothes into his bag, barely bothering to fold them, each shove punctuated by his racing thoughts. He replayed the scene over and over—his voice louder, sharper than he’d meant, the blame lashing out at her, even though he knew damn well it was his own screw-ups at the heart of it. He felt a tightness in his chest as he remembered her face—the way she’d flinched, the hurt he’d planted there.

He had just put that girl through one hell of an emotional rollercoaster, but to be fair, he had done the same thing to himself, and he told himself, in the end, that was for the better. That shutting her out, showing her just why she should stay away from him—that was the right thing to do. A sensible thing. He’d meant to handle it gently, sit her down at his place after dinner with her folks, and explain. He wasn’t exactly sure what he was going to tell her. He wasn’t good with words or delicate situations, but she didn’t deserve for him to just ignore her texts. Ignore her. That, and he couldn’t have her trying to break his resolve. She had to get the message and back off.

But he should’ve kept calm, should’ve controlled his temper, not lashed out. That hurt expression on her face as he threw his words at her like knives, each driving her further away from him, lingered in his mind, making his hands tremble as he stuffed his hunting gear into his bag. He told himself this was right—that shutting her out was for her own good, that he was sparing her from something worse. But deep down, a voice whispered that it was all just a weak excuse. He didn’t let it take root, pressing it down, swallowing the guilt like a bitter pill.

He grabbed his bag and stormed out, the door slamming behind him. The air outside was thick and heavy, and he barely stopped to lock up before he threw himself into the woods. In his haste, he’d barely packed enough food, hadn’t grabbed enough spare shirts, and had left his phone back at home. But that was fine, he told himself. He could manage on animal meat and stream water just fine. Not that he deserved anything more.

The regret bit at him later, lying on the hard ground beneath the open sky, staring blankly at the canopy above. No way to know if Rick had news on the investigation, no way to reach anyone. But that didn’t matter. Nothing really mattered, not out there.

He still kept himself busy thinking about the murder, choosing this subject over the one that made him pack up and leave. He went through everything he knew time and time again, trying not to let himself stray to the dangerous territory of his feelings—and failing miserably each time.

Finding the murderer’s shack was lucky. Thanks to it, they knew now that the guy had killed before in different cities in Georgia, they knew his MO, and they had pictures of the girls he could be chatting up next. It should’ve been enough. But it had been months, and even though Daryl still had his guys follow the girls from the pictures, they found no suspicious activities, no strange men fitting in with what they knew about the killer. They didn’t let the finding of the shack go public, hoping that if the killer didn’t realize they found it, he would still chat up those girls. Unfortunately, he was either too smart for that—knowing there was an investigation going on—or he had clocked them.

What confused Daryl, though, was the night at The Bronze. That guy Sophia wrote about in her diary was working in a different way than the one who tried taking Beth. Sophia’s murderer made her trust him first and became her secret friend, her safe space. He didn’t try kidnapping her, and there was nothing in Sophia’s diary that would suggest that she was ever pressured into meeting him. In fact, if not for the sinister ending, one would think that Sophia wrote in her diary about someone she had a little innocent crush on. There was no indication of her friend being older than she was—not in her writing, not on the long pages she wrote about their spot in the woods, the one they played at when Carol thought Sophia was with her friends or at her school clubs.

Something his friend felt immensely guilty of was not realizing for months that every time she dropped Sophia at some place, she would be next picked up by that man. Instead of friends and school activities, Sophia spent her time in the woods and in that shack—the one Daryl had walked by on his hunting trips enough times to now kick himself for never feeling like checking it out before.

Daryl felt nauseous thinking about it, and the feeling only doubled after the dinner at Greene’s. Sitting across Beth’s family was an endeavor he should have known would be disastrous. Listening to their everyday conversations while feeling her heavy eyes on him the whole time, urging him to look, to indulge in this dark, twisted thing clouding his mind since that night, was torturous even before the attack on his person.

Ironic, huh? How spot-on Shawn Greene was in his assessment of the situation. It could just as well be like Beth’s brother said. Daryl fitted with the murderer’s MO perfectly: befriending the girl, making her see him as someone safe, making her family grateful to him for it too, making her develop a little crush on him that he could exploit whenever he felt like it. He would have to have an ego the size of the lake or something to do that under everyone’s noses and after he became the only suspect in the previous crime. Clearly, he would have to be insane. Still, it would fit in more with what they knew about Sophia’s murderer than the guy who roofied Beth at the party. Was it possible, though, that these two cases were unrelated? Rick thought so, but Daryl wasn't too sure.

His head was full of speculations and questions without answers, and he hated that, hated feeling hopeless. Rick thought they should just drop it, as the chances of finding the guy were almost non-existent without new evidence. He might have moved again too. Before, he never moved away after one victim, killing at least two or three right under the police’s noses, as if bragging, showing off to them: Look what I can do, and you can’t even find me. Every time he killed, he laid his victims on a bed of roses in a truly worshipful manner, which is how they knew the cases from other cities were related. He never waited so long to kill another one, though, working fast after that first victim of his cycle.

Daryl just couldn’t stop obsessing over this subject. What was worse, though, was that every time he thought about it during these few days in the woods, his mind always managed to arrive at the same place: the case of Beth Greene and the mess he created when he let her take his drunk ass home. It was like these two things became interlocked in his head.

It should be reassuring, knowing that after the insanity that was kissing her, letting her sit on his lap, rubbing off him in that sweet way no one ever did to him before—not when he went for a quick release, a dirty fumble in some bathroom or in the back alley of some club, and not when he took them home either, too busy shedding their clothes off and getting to the finish line—he was still reasonable enough to cut the infected limb right away. Put some distance. Cut this thing between them down before it could get out of hand. But it wasn’t reassuring at all. In fact, it just hurt something fierce, and Daryl had no idea why. 

When he finally came back home, dirty, smelly, and dead on his feet, five days later, it wasn’t to any revelation from Rick but to a few calls from Carol, Merle’s drunk ass on the couch, Jess’ worried looks, and Beth’s messages. He made a point of not reading any of the texts she sent him, locking his phone right after seeing her name on the screen, and went to shower. He squeezed his eyes shut, letting himself forget all his worries, all the thoughts plaguing his mind washing down the drain with the water.

As he reentered the living room half an hour later, he was surprised to find the smell of freshly baked cookies, coffee, and mac and cheese. He eyed the table, his stomach rumbling loudly at the mere idea of normal food.

“How… What…?” Daryl gave his friend an incredulous look, his feet leading him to the table as if on their own.

“Hello to you too.” Carol sent him a tight-lipped smile. “Thanks for letting me know you were back, or, I don’t know, that you were going away in the first place. That really helped with not freaking out, you know?”

Daryl dropped his gaze down, worrying his lip between his teeth for a moment, before uttering a quiet, guilty, “Sorry.”

Carol watched him hover over the table for another moment before rolling her eyes at him and huffing, “Come on, dig in. I didn’t come all the way over here to watch you stare at the food.”

Daryl would’ve been offended at her condescending tone if he wasn’t so damn hungry. Carol’s cooking was always mouthwatering, too. He sat down and got into it without another word, seemingly unperturbed by Carol’s careful gaze. Inside, he was vibrating with nervous energy.

“I would’ve cooked something better, but I didn’t know you were coming back. Jess only called me an hour ago, the moment you got here, and mac and cheese was the only thing I had in my fridge, so mac and cheese it is.”

“Thanks, it’s awesome.”

“Much better than some squirrels, I hope.”

Daryl gave her an apologetic look, the tips of his ears on fire. She knew him too well.

Carol smiled, and this time it was an honest gesture, no barely hidden anger behind it, as she watched him ravaging the dish.

She let him finish before she asked the dreadful question. “What happened?”

Daryl cleared his throat, then reached for one of the three cups of coffee. Merle was nowhere in sight again, probably having switched rooms when Carol got here, but clearly, someone else was joining them.

“That for Jess?” Daryl asked, pointing to the third cup with his chin.

“Yes, he’ll drop by in a moment, but don’t even try to change the subject, Daryl Dixon. I’ve been worried sick. You never leave without a word like that.”

True, but then again, he’d never kissed someone he shouldn’t have before either. Never really wanted to kiss anyone, as it turns out—not like that, at least. Never had any inappropriate thoughts about anyone that much younger than him either. Definitely never had no Beth Greene telling him she liked him before. So, he guessed he was allowed to freak out a little. He could bet Carol would freak out if she knew too. Not that Daryl intended to tell her.

“You didn’t take your phone, Merle had no idea what happened or where you went. If I didn’t find your hunting gear missing…”

“It was a spur-of-the-moment kinda decision…” he trailed off, seeing her unimpressed expression.

“I could tell that, but what happened, Daryl? Are you alright?”

Daryl shrugged. He didn’t like lying to her. It didn’t sit right with him. But lying was better than seeing disgust on her face. Better than her hating him for being a creep and a pervert. So, he uttered, shame sweeping through him, “‘M fine. I just wanted to go huntin’. Nothin’ to it.”

Carol scrunched her face at him, and he knew then that she saw through him.

“You know, you’re not a good liar. And even if you were… you dropped off the face of the Earth for five days without telling anyone, and you want me to believe it’s all fine and dandy?”

Daryl had no answer to that, so he just shrugged again, his eyes darting to the cookies Carol brought. He reached for one, ignoring her imploring gaze on him. They sat in silence for a long moment, him eating the cookies and sipping on the best coffee of his life, and her scrutinizing him, waiting for him to break. He didn’t. Not on the outside, at least. Inside, he was breaking at the seams continuously since the first time Beth laid one on him. Perhaps even before that.

Finally, Carol sighed, giving up. “Fine, keep your secrets. For now. I ain’t letting you off the hook that easily.”

This time it was Daryl that gave her an unimpressed look. They both knew that if he didn’t want to talk about something, he wasn’t going to. That’s just how it was.

Merle would tell you it was a Dixon trait—talking feelings wasn’t for them. But Daryl thought it wasn’t as much a trait as a curse. No matter how much he wanted to, the words would never leave his mouth. He knew that. The possibility of Carol reacting badly to them was too great of a risk, and his brain might have betrayed him when it came to Beth, but it surely wasn’t letting him jeopardize his friendship with Carol.

As if tuned into his internal monologue, Carol added, her voice taking on a softer note, “You’ve got to start letting people in, you know? Nobody can go on this long without sharing their burdens with someone.”

Daryl grunted in response. Perhaps if all that happened with Beth wasn’t freaking him out so badly, he would’ve told her then. But it was easier to hide. To push it to the back of his mind and pretend that it was all fine. That his phone didn’t burn him through his pocket, the knowledge of the existence of some texts that Beth sent him enough to make him feel restless again. That after those five days, the events of Thursday night weren’t still alive and vibrant in his head, eating at him. That he wasn’t curious about her still, no matter what he told everyone. No matter what he told himself even.

“Alright,” Daryl said, leaning back into the worn-out couch. He took a sip of coffee, savoring the warmth as he glanced at Carol, pushing all thoughts of Beth Greene into the back of his mind. “You can take Merle off my back every Monday, Thursday, and Saturday. That enough burden-sharin’ for you?”

Carol gave a soft laugh, but her smile faded a little, her gaze warm and worried on his face. “Daryl…”

He brushed it off with a wave of his hand, his eyes darting to the window, a hint of defensiveness in his posture. “Told ya, I’m fine, woman,” he muttered, looking almost embarrassed.

She narrowed her eyes at him with mock sternness, folding her arms. “Fine. Be that way, man.”

They both chuckled, and then she leaned in, lowering her voice with a conspiratorial grin. “Alright, now—business.”

Daryl raised an eyebrow as he grabbed another cookie, half-smiling.

“Business?”

“Yes, business.” She took a sip of coffee, fixing him with a determined look. “I’m taking you to dinner tomorrow, and no, this is non-negotiable. I got my first paycheck yesterday, and I’m gonna spoil you rotten for talking Aaron into hiring me.”

Daryl scratched the back of his neck, bashful. “Wasn’t much of a talkin’ into,” he mumbled, his gaze flicking away as he tried to downplay it. “He’d be stupid not to hire ya.”

Carol softened, her fingers idly tracing the rim of her coffee cup. “Maybe. Still… I wouldn’t have gone to him myself, not after everything with Sophia.” She hesitated, her voice lowering. “It’s… still hard to get up some days. But going back to work—getting back on my feet—it’s helped more than I can say. And it wouldn’t have happened without you, Pookie.”

Daryl brushed off her gratitude with a huff. “Stop. Ain’t done nothin’,” he said, focusing on a thread unraveling on his jeans, not feeling particularly deserving of her appreciation. “Just talked to a friend. Don’t need ya spendin’ your money on me.”

Carol leaned back, crossing her arms with a grin and a stubborn tilt of her head. “Maybe not, but I want to. And if you don’t let me, I’ll keep poking at you about that ‘hunting trip’ of yours,” she teased, raising an eyebrow.

Daryl rolled his eyes, shaking his head, though a hint of a smile betrayed him. “Fine. Deal,” he said, sighing as if defeated. “I finish work at five. Gonna pick me up like the gentleman you are?”

“Oh, don’t worry, I will,” Carol said with a grin, and Daryl snorted. It was easier not to think about his own internal struggles with Carol here, he realized. Much easier than when he was alone in the woods.

She didn’t ask about the hunting trip again, not on that day, nor the next one. They didn’t talk about the case either, and during the next few days, Daryl finally managed to stuff those subjects into two little boxes and put them somewhere far inside his mind. He didn’t let himself take a peek at Beth’s texts either.

All in all, Daryl was right about two things. One: the killer did kill again almost two weeks after his dinner at Greene’s. And two: even with the investigation going, the murderer still had his sights set on the girls from the pictures they found.

He was wrong about one thing only, and that one thing was not in any way related to the murderer: he didn’t manage to cut the infected limb off.

Notes:

I'm sorry Daryl and Beth didn't really get to interact with each other in this one, but I promise the wait is going to be worth it ;)
P.S. Next chapter tomorrow 💙💚

Chapter 17: Kiss a biker

Summary:

The beginning of the summer brings in a heatwave and ignites tensions between Beth and Daryl during an unexpected meeting...

Notes:

As promised, another chapter is here - I'm quite proud of that one, so I really hope you'll love it just as much as I do <3
Daryl is one stubborn guy, but maybe Beth will be able to break his resolve, what do you guys think? ^^

***

The coast of the lake was full of colors and noises produced by seniors celebrating the end of their last high school year. The flames warmed Beth’s skin, coloring her cheeks with light as she watched others gathered around it with a smile on her face. The music—soft notes from Eddie’s guitar—was carried through the beach by the wind that played gently on the hems of her T-shirt, bringing a much-needed refresher from the heat wave accompanying them at the start of vacation.

She was here with all her schoolmates, including Jimmy’s little group, but summer vibes and new beginnings put everyone in such a good mood that nobody remembered to tease her anymore. Still, Beth kept close to Amy and Lilly, both of whom forgave her for lying—Amy on Friday when they talked on the phone in the evening, with Beth, blushing heavily, recalling her first make-out session in a hushed whisper; Lilly only after Beth told her that the whole Dixon thing was done for good. But a win was a win, and Beth wasn’t going to look a gift horse in the mouth. They’d been friends forever, and Beth wanted them to still be on good terms, even if they were going to part ways for college and had different views on things. For this reason, she used all of her willpower to not let her eyes stray from their group to the other one, situated a little farther away from the coastline and closer to the wall of trees where the pavement leading to the road started, allowing them to keep their bikes off the sand.

“Seems like we’re not the only ones celebrating the beginning of summer, huh?” Steve murmured to her conversationally, and she sent him a small smile, not sure if it was the start of a tease or something else entirely. Thankfully, it wasn’t, and they soon ventured into other topics, mainly relating to their plans for the holidays and future colleges.

And if Beth felt her skin crawling with heat and anticipation the whole time, painfully aware of Daryl Dixon’s presence behind her back, she didn’t let it show on her face. Rationally, she knew she had nothing to expect from their sudden, unexpected proximity. He hadn’t responded to any of the texts she’d sent him since that dinner at her house, and Beth was just as surprised to see him here tonight as everyone else. Still, she couldn’t get rid of the feelings he had invoked in her.

She dared to glance at him only once, and when she did, it was hard to keep herself from dragging her eyes over his unruly hair, his biceps glistening in the sun, the worn-out vest with angel wings etched onto it. She drank in his sight, following his movements hungrily as he wrestled with Zach playfully. The jeans hung dangerously low on his round ass, a red bandana adorning his right pocket. The muscles of his arms tightened and became even more visible during the play-fight, and Beth licked her lips absentmindedly.

When Zach threw his hands in the air, laughing loudly and asking for mercy, Daryl backed off, his lips stretching into a joyful smirk. That’s when, as if following some gut feeling, he turned his head away and in her direction, his eyes meeting hers across the beach for a fleeting moment.

“It’s your turn, Bethy!” Amy shoved her lightly, giggling, completely unaware of the spark igniting within Beth once more.

She turned around, not missing the sharp look Lilly was sending her way—darn it—and startled a little at the attention directed at her.

“Alright, yeah, let’s see.” She willed herself to focus, but she could still feel his eyes on her, burning holes in her head—or so she wished was happening. Perhaps she was being naive again. Perhaps he went back to his own friends right away, not perturbed by their proximity in the way she definitely was.

“I helped deliver a filly last year. I’ve never been out of the country. And I rode a motorcycle this year.”

She cursed at herself internally for making that last sentence about something she did with Daryl, but she couldn’t take it back now. The conversation around the fire picked up, people guessing and suggesting which of the three sentences was the lie. Lilly and Amy were silent, letting others set their bets, and it wasn’t until Steve asked them to contribute that Amy said, with the conviction of someone who knew her well:

“Never been out of the country, easy.”

“You rode a bike?! Man, that’s so cool!” Eddie shouted over his guitar, and Beth felt her cheeks get even warmer.

“Yeah,” she breathed out, not catching herself in time, and throwing a look behind her. Daryl was sitting on one of the logs, strapping a beer bottle off its cover, and, to her utter disappointment, not looking her way. She sighed, glancing back at her phone. She wondered if he would look at her again if she sent him a message but quickly discarded the idea. It was supposed to be a done deal, she promised Lilly.

What’s more, she promised her daddy, after he explained to her that they’d talked about it with her mom and decided it would be best if the subject of Daryl Dixon died at their house entirely. Their sudden acquaintance with him was simply adding too much heat to the fuel, and as much as Hershel loved her for trying to see the good in people and do good by them when the whole world turned its back, he had to think about their family first. And this subject was making them all fight themselves too much. It wasn’t worth it. Dad promised, in turn, that he would apologize to Daryl for Shawn’s behavior, but the topic was not to be brought up again in their household, and Daryl was no longer going to come to work on their farm.

With these developments and Daryl’s insistence on not writing her back, Beth didn’t really feel like she was lying when she told Lilly that she was over it. It really did seem like whatever was brewing there would have to slowly die down in the face of his distance. Well, he also did basically tell you he was done with you, or are you forgetting? Not that there was something to be done with when it didn’t even start in the first place, she thought bitterly, hoping she was managing to keep a grimace off her face.

The games got progressively less innocent and more dangerously sexy once the alcohol made its rounds around the circle. The first time the bottle of Peach Schnapps reached Beth, she took it with all the intention of passing it to Steve without taking a drink herself. It was what she’d usually done at parties. Her dad was a recovering alcoholic, and she always thought alcohol was an evil invention that made you into someone you’re not. But this time, when she took the bottle, she stopped.

What if she wanted to be someone else for a night? What if she’d had enough of the old goody-two-shoes Bethy?

She took a swing, her coughs drowning in the joy that her action produced in her peers. Steve was smiling at her brightly when she finally handed it to him.

“First times can be rough,” he said, with no malice hidden behind his words. It wasn’t that funny, but Beth laughed anyway, overcome with a new kind of excitement. When she turned to Amy and Lilly, they were both smiling as well.

“Bethy! You really are rebranding yourself, ain’t you?” Amy leaned into her, giggling, and Beth laughed again.

“Maybe I am,” she said resolutely.

And maybe it was because of that drink, and a few rounds that came after, that made her so willing to keep playing the games, even as they started becoming more and more twisted. At some point, people divided into smaller groups, giving Beth an out from the games that were slowly crossing the line of appropriate. Both Amy and Lilly chose to keep playing, though, and Beth was tipsy enough to follow their lead into the game of Truth or Dare, which consisted mostly of intimate questions and dramatic dares. Beth was laughing throughout it all, watching as person after person went and did or said something embarrassing. She watched Steve and Eddie play gay chicken, heard Thomas admit to wearing Amy’s panties once after losing a bet to her, and blushed heavily when Peter ripped his clothes off and ran to the water naked. Trying not to look at his naked, smooth body, she averted her gaze and found Daryl on the other side of the beach.

He was already watching her, his eyes glinting in the warm glow of the flames, and Beth took a huge intake of breath, her tummy squeezing in a familiar way. Was he mad at her for drinking? From his point of view, she must have seemed completely irresponsible—throwing herself into danger left and right. But who cared? He said they were done, so she could do whatever she wanted, no reason to think about whether it made him angry or not. That look of his, though? It made her skin prickle.

“Bethy!” Yet again, she was pulled out of her thoughts by Amy, who grabbed her hand with a squeak. Lilly was not paying her any attention this time, her tongue down Cordelia’s throat. Beth opened her mouth, completely shocked by the display. Boys around them howled and whistled, but it was Amy’s glassy look and her strong, almost bruising grip on Beth’s hand that caught her attention the most. Her pupils dilated, mouth hanging half open and brows furrowing; she seemed devastated, shocked, and entranced all at once. Beth looked to Thomas to see if he was paying any attention to his girlfriend, but he was too busy howling and eyeing the show in front of them to notice. Beth squeezed Amy’s hand in hers while Lilly finally separated from Cordelia, having reached the end of the counted time. It was Lilly’s turn to spin the bottle, but Beth wasn’t paying it any mind, too busy finding Amy’s eyes and making sure she was alright.

Only when Amy nodded to her, still somewhat taken aback by it all, did Beth look back to the bottle. It just so happened that it stopped on her this time.

“Truth,” she said instantly, but Lilly laughed in response, shaking her head.

“Oh no, no, no, Greene, you said the truth the last three times. You know the rules, it’s dare for you this time, honey.”

She sighed. Her time had come, and the worst part was: Lilly was relentless when it came to dares. She was the one who made Peter run around naked no more than twenty minutes before.

“Fine. Dare then,” she said bravely, eyeing Lilly.

“Kiss a biker.” Beth knew her eyes widened in shock, but what surprised her was that Lilly’s did too, as if she hadn’t thought at all before saying that, as if it wasn’t something she had planned. What the hell? Beth looked to Amy for help, but her other friend was also gaping at her, while the rest of their circle literally lost their minds. Laughter and whistles sounded around her, but all she could really hear was her fast heartbeat. She panicked.

“What? No, think of something else.”

Lilly looked apologetic.

Have you lost your mind? Beth wanted to ask her, but the words got stuck in her throat when the conversations swirled around her. She would suspect Jimmy or Cordelia to do something like this, but Lilly? The same Lilly that didn’t even want to talk to her until Beth told her that the whole Daryl thing was done?

The other girl blushed heavily under Beth’s gaze, as if she could read her mind.

“Yeah, sure, just…” Lilly sputtered, but was interrupted by the others.

“Hey! No, a rule is a rule, what’s said is said.” It was Thomas who spoke, and Beth shot daggers at him.

“Yeah, that’s what we agreed on. Sorry, Beth.” Eddie added, and the rest of the circle agreed readily.

“Come on, Beth, I just ran around naked in front of you all, what’s that compared to a little kiss?” Peter smiled at her. It was meant to be reassuring, she supposed, but the glint in his eyes was a little mean.

“With a biker? They are not gonna… They are…” Beth shot a look at Daryl’s circle again, her heart moving to her throat. Daryl’s eyes flickered to hers as if summoned, and Beth swallowed audibly, her whole body vibrating at the idea of striding to him, dropping to his lap, and kissing him in front of everyone.

She wasn’t drunk, just tipsy and in a good mood, but apparently that was enough because the next thing she knew, she was on her feet. Her friends cheered her on as she moved in the direction of the bikers, and her blood churned in her veins by a sudden wave of desire. What the hell was she doing?

Daryl watched her the whole time, his eyebrows furrowing, lip caught between his teeth. His eyes were heavy on her, her breath catching from all the emotions they awakened inside her anew. She stopped midway, barely handling the intensity of his gaze. Daryl was staring at her the same way when she came to him in Maggie’s dress after he rescued her from some creep, but now it felt more loaded, purposeful even. His gaze shifted from her face and dropped to her black lace crop top she stole from Maggie’s room and matching black shorts adorned with a flowery design. His eyes strayed from her face for what must have been a second or two, but it was enough for her to feel the heat bloom within her once more. It started deep down in her tummy and spread from there, leaving her wanting.

She started heading in his direction again, ignoring the warning etched in his features. Somewhere in the back of her mind, she knew it was a mistake. She had already made a fool out of herself, writing him all these messages, pouring her heart out just to be ignored. But she was spotted by all the other bikers now, and she couldn’t back down from the challenge. Could she?

It was Zach who addressed her first, his face lighting up at the sight of her.

“Oh, what’s up, beautiful? Somethin’ I can help with?” His accent took on a familiar note, and she realized with a start that he was trying to copy Daryl’s. Beth smiled at him, then shot a long look at Daryl and gulped, still finding his eyes on her. He didn’t seem to notice Zach’s attempt, either used to it or too busy watching her. Beth hoped it was the latter. Oh God, did she hope it was the latter.

“Hi,” she breathed out.

“Hey, honeybunch. What’s a nice lil’ hun like you lookin’ for here?” It was Merle who spoke next, Daryl not answering her at all. It was a little unnerving and awfully thrilling, the way Daryl just kept watching her with haunted eyes. Beth wasn’t able to tell whether it was desire or anger, but her hands started sweating all the same, her mind spiraling again. He didn’t write you back, Beth. What the hell are you doing approaching him like that, and with everyone watching too? You lost your Goddamn mind, girl? The last question sounded in her ears in his husky voice, making her shiver slightly. It drew his attention back to her body for another second or two, which created a new, strange pull between her legs.

“I-um,” she averted her eyes from Daryl, suddenly unable to form a sentence with him staring at her like that. She eyed the other people gathered around the fire, finding some familiar faces. Ryan, Garry, the guys who were with them at the shop when she came to Daryl with cupcakes, Merle and Zach were joined by three other guys Beth had never seen before. They were all Daryl’s age or older from the looks of it, leaving Ryan and Zach as the youngest members of the club. She wasn’t sure when Zach joined exactly, but he did, judging from the new addition to his look: a vest just like Daryl’s.

“We’re playing this game, and I was dared by my friends to…um…” Darn, that was a mistake, wasn’t it? She shouldn’t be doing this. She thought about turning around and just forfeiting the whole thing, but her mouth ran quicker than her brain, and before she could excuse herself, the words were out. “To kiss one of you.”

“I volunteer!” Zach rose to his feet so fast, he knocked over Merle’s beer, earning himself a mouthful. “Fuck, sorry, sorry.” He stepped over it, and before she could oppose, he was right in front of her, smiling at her brightly as he opened his arms in invitation. “Kiss away, beautiful.”

Glancing at Daryl was a mistake. If she thought he was watching her with exasperation before, now he seemed seething with fury. He was gnawing at the inside of his mouth with his teeth, his eyes unmoving and dark on her face. Was it bad that she found the idea that he was jealous thrilling? The thought of him feeling possessive, of maybe not letting her touch someone else, stirred something deep inside her. Things like that would never have entered her mind before, but lately, she was surprising herself time and time again. She willed him to say something, to get up and say that he’d do it, but Daryl didn’t move from his spot, as if glued to it.

She blushed, turning back to Zach and noticing him looking between her and Daryl with curiosity. How long were they staring at each other without a word? Beth couldn’t be sure, too focused on internally screaming at him to just do something to care about appearances.

“So? What’s it gonna be, love? ‘Cause, ya know, I’m ready to go, anytime really.” His cheeks were colored red, and he swayed a little, apparently a little more than tipsy.

“Um, yeah, I mean…” No other volunteers? Daryl? She wanted to ask, but the thought of him refusing stopped her. If he wanted to, he would’ve said something, right? “Sure.”

She nodded, more so to herself than him, stepped into his space, and leaned in, her skin still prickling under Daryl’s heavy gaze. Her body was trembling from all the tension, and she felt the heat swiping through her body, all because of the way she knew Daryl was watching her.

Zach’s lips weren’t as soft as Jimmy’s, nor as chapped as Daryl’s, and the smell of alcohol coming off him made her scrunch her nose first. But when a second later, it brought back the memory of her kisses with Daryl, she forgot all about the disgust. She went in for a quick closed-lip kiss, but the moment their mouths met, Zach moved to tangle his hand in her hair, his tongue prodding at her lips to let him in. She tried moving away then, but when a silent whine escaped her as the image of Daryl’s tongue fighting with hers for dominance, of his hand tangling in her hair in a similar way, entered her mind, Zach used it to his advantage. The whole thing lasted no more than a few seconds when Zach moved to press his body against hers and tripped again, his whole body weight barreling forward and to the side. If it wasn’t for a strong hand catching her in the middle and pulling her to her left, she would’ve tumbled with him.

She let out a shaky breath, first looking down at the arm wrapped around her bare waist, then seeking Daryl’s eyes in a daze. Every point of contact between them sent a thrilling heat coursing through her skin.

If anyone ever told her that’s how it felt to desire someone, she would’ve laughed in their faces. It was surely impossible to feel so strongly about another person. It seemed unnatural to come undone like this just because of the manner in which his fingers twitched on her skin when their eyes met.
He must have jumped to his feet in record time to be able to catch her like that, must have been watching pretty intensely to do it on time, she realized, swallowing audibly.

“You good?” His voice rumbled out of him, impossibly hoarse, giving her goosebumps.

“Yeah,” she said on an exhale. She sounded breathy even to her own ears, and she knew darn well that it wasn’t because of that kiss. Why him, she wondered. So many men out there, and he seemed to be the only one having that effect on her.

He let go of her then, to her utter disappointment, leaving her space altogether.

“Thanks,” was all she was able to get out of herself. She didn’t even know if she was addressing Daryl or Zach, who, in the time she’d spent gazing into Daryl’s eyes, had managed to get himself on his knees and was now in the process of getting up, his focus on cussing and groaning loudly rather than on her.
Her quivering legs carried her back to her group of friends, where she was welcomed with applause and happy whistles.

“Congrats on the upgrade, Beth,” Cordelia fake-whispered as the noise around them died out.

“What?” Beth raised her head to look at her absentmindedly. People around her shuffled to their feet, getting ready for a swim, but she was still in a daze after what transpired, thinking about Daryl watching her kiss somebody else, wondering if he wanted to take Zach’s place.
Hoping. Yearning.

“Oh, you know. Dixon for Gellner. Seems like a good trade. At least Zach seems to shower sometimes.” Cordelia smiled at her sweetly.

“Oh, for Christ’s sake, shut up, Cordy. No one asked your opinion.” It was Amy who jumped in to protect her, her voice dripping with rage. Cordelia raised her hands in defeat and went to join the others for a swim, leaving Beth alone with Lilly and Amy. She didn’t even notice that they were the only ones who stayed until Amy clasped a hand on hers.

“Hey, Beth, is everything alright?”

People just couldn’t stop asking her that lately. It made her wonder if she really was this helpless, this unable to take care of herself in their eyes.

“Yeah, I’m fine, but I think I want to go back now. Can we go back?” She raised her eyes to her friends. Lilly had a guilty look on her face, and Amy was smiling at her reassuringly.

“Yeah, as soon as Tommy is back from the swim, I’ll ask him to drive us back.”

Beth nodded, still not quite back to herself.

“Are you mad?” Lilly spoke after a moment of silence. “At me?”

Was she? Beth chanced a glance at Daryl’s group, but Daryl was not among them this time. She sighed, feeling disappointed. No, she wasn’t mad, she decided. She just wished she could have kissed Daryl instead.

“It’s okay, Lilly. I’m just…” She wasn’t sure what she was just. “I need to pee. I’ll be right back, okay?” Beth moved to get up, her bladder reminding her of its existence at just the right moment. Being alone sounded like just the thing she needed right now. Taking a breath, calming herself before what was surely going to be a loud ride back home full of teasing remarks and laughter. It didn’t feel like the laughing matter now, though. Not with how Daryl’s presence affected her.

“Want me to go with you?” Amy asked, but Beth shook her head.

She felt overwhelmed with what just happened, with how strongly she felt about Daryl, even in the middle of kissing another guy. As if her body knew it belonged to Daryl only, as if it could only ever react to him. It was just as strange and terrifying as it was exciting and astounding. It made this ache inside of her chest even more unbearable than it was during the last two weeks.

Beth ventured into the woods on the edge of the beach, carefully stepping over twigs and beer bottles. She paused, glancing back to make sure she was far enough from view. With a quiet sigh, she unbuttoned her jeans and crouched, but just a second later, a sudden movement from behind the trees made her jerk right back up. Her breath caught, and she stumbled, almost tripping over her own legs as she quickly pulled her pants back up, heat rising to her cheeks at the sight of Daryl, standing there with a look of surprise that mirrored her own.
It only lasted a second or two, before he stammered back and around her, not even regarding her with a quick hello or sorry-I-scared-you.

“Ignore me, sure,” she mumbled more to herself than to him, hurt making her act out. “That’s what you do best.”

Daryl stopped in the middle of his stride, and as he glanced back at her, Beth felt a blush rising to her cheeks. It was impressive, really, how quickly his face morphed into one of anger, his eyes darkening as he spat,

“Yeah? And the hell do you think you’re doin’?” He took a step in her direction, throwing his hand in the air for emphasis. “Runnin’ your goddamn mouth to your friends like that?”

Beth froze, her heart pounding as she processed his words. 

“What? What do you mean?” she stammered, her voice wavering, bewildered.

“Kiss one of them bikers, huh? But you already fucking did! That's why they put you to this, didn’t they? Couldn’t keep your mouth shut, huh?” His voice was low, seething, as he closed the distance between them, his gaze piercing and unrelenting. She shrank back, feeling the force of his accusation slam into her. She wasn’t running her mouth, wasn’t gossiping—she just wanted to share with her friends all the excitement she felt at the prospect of being with him like that, but now it seemed like a grave mistake. “What is this? Some fucking bet you have goin’ on? To fuck some mean asshole biker?!”

Beth’s breath hitched as the words sank in, anger flaring hot beneath her skin. What was he talking about? How could he think this?

“Daryl, stop!” she burst out, her voice shaking with frustration and hurt. “It’s not like that! You know that!”

“Not like that, huh? The hell you sendin’ me those texts for then?” The harshness of his words hit her like a slap. She blinked, feeling tears prick at her eyes, but she steadied herself. She wasn’t going to cry in front of him. Not now. Not like that. “A kid is dead, some fucking pedo roaming the streets, and all you can think of is getting drunk and dirty with some jerk!”

“Shut up!” Beth’s voice rose as her face flushed with anger and hurt, her chest tightening as she struggled to keep her composure. She took a step forward too, meeting his furious gaze. “Those texts weren’t about that, and you don’t get to make it into some filthy, shameful thing just because you can’t accept that someone might actually like you!”

Daryl’s face darkened, his mouth pressed into a hard line, but his eyes flickered—almost vulnerable. She could see it clearly now with him standing just one small step away from her.

“This ain’t no damn romance novel.” He practically spat the words in her face, his voice growing more forceful. “Ain’t no prince charmin’ here, girl. And if you don’t stop askin’ for it, runnin’ around in your little goddamn shorts, gettin’ pissed and horny left and right, you’ll end up in a ditch somewhere! That’s what you want?!”

Beth’s breath came in short, sharp bursts, anger and disbelief crashing together as she took in his words. He was close enough now that she could feel the tension radiating from him, his fists clenched, his jaw tight with barely restrained frustration.

“No! Screw you! You don’t get it!” The words left her in a rush, her voice raising an octave higher as her emotions spilled out of her. He just kept shouting at her every single time they’d met lately, and she’d had enough. “And I’m not gonna listen to this bullshit anymore!”

She showed him her middle finger, her eyes shooting daggers at him and her heart pounding stronger than ever. She was seething with anger, ready to stomp back to her friends and make them leave, to never spare one more look at Daryl Dixon. But he didn’t let her—his hand shooting up and grabbing her by the wrist, pulling her right back.

“Where the hell do you think you’re goin’?! I ain’t done with ya!”

“But you are! You said that yourself, Daryl!” She shouted right back, her face inches from his, too angry to hold back. Now, she jabbed her finger into his chest with each sentence. “So what’s the matter now?! What do you care? Or are you just mad ‘cause I kissed someone else? Huh?!”

Her voice hitched on the last sentence, raw with emotion, and it struck him harder than she’d expected. Daryl’s face twisted, his hand snapping up to catch her finger, his grip firm but unsteady. They stood frozen, both of her hands trapped in his now, their breaths coming fast and shallow, chests heaving as their eyes locked.

“That’s what you think this is?” He croaked finally, his voice barely above a whisper. She felt her pulse hammering in her throat as his hand shifted, releasing her finger but not letting go of her, his hand sliding to her wrist, pulling her even closer. She didn’t resist, her breath hitching when his second hand raised to her face to cup her jaw. “I’m just jealous, huh?”

She swallowed audibly, her anger melting into something else entirely.

“I don’t know.” She breathed out. They were so close now, close enough that she could feel the warmth of his breath on her cheek, see the battle in his eyes as he looked at her. “Are you?” He fell silent, watching her with raw emotion in his baby blues. Beth pressed even further, her voice barely rising above a whisper as she watched him right back, tracing the lines of his face. “’Cause if you are, you can only blame yourself.”

“Yeah? And how do you figure that?” He gritted out, his eyes never leaving hers, electricity sparking between them as she leaned even further into him, pushing through his hold on her face. Her breath hitched again, heartbeat picking up pace when he moved his thumb to gently press it into her lower lip, effectively freezing her in her spot.

“You could’ve said something. Done something,” she challenged him, trying and failing to ignore the way he was squeezing her wrist in his other hand, the way he pushed his tongue in between his teeth, regarding her with something akin to exasperation, but deeper than that. “But you didn’t. So…” She shrugged, as if it was nothing, as if his gaze wasn’t unraveling her— all heat and smoldering intensity. As if her lips weren’t quivering with barely contained hunger when his thumb traced their soft curve. “Are you jealous, Daryl?”

Notes:

I'm sorry for the kiss, do not kill me, there's a method in this madness I promise XD
I mean, hopefully you can already see why it was necessary.
I know I left you on another cliffhanger though, and I'm sorry, so here is a little something to make it better:
Next chapter will be added on Sunday <3

Chapter 18: Can we talk about it?

Summary:

Another girl falls victim to Sophia's murderer, and Daryl loses it.

Notes:

Ufff, finally! I've been thinking about posting that chapter the whole day - life has a funny way of always getting between me and my plans, but anyway...
Thank you so much for all your lovely comments! <3
I love them all and I'm forever grateful to anyone who takes a moment to leave a few words in here. It makes me want to publish chapters as often as possible. It's also really nice to read about the things that caught your attention, very rewarding, so TY & keep them coming please <3 I mean, if you want ^^

P.S.I was playing this song on loop when I was writing this chapter: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hJ8G1SlMssk - yeah, I'm a sucker for fanvids. Some of them are just too good, you know?

***

When he first heard about another victim, he was sitting in the garage working on an old, beat-up ford that belonged to Oswald, Jess’ close friend. The TV was broadcasting the news, and Daryl looked up right after the lady journalist mentioned the name of their small city. According to her, one of the reporters had managed to get to the place right before they took the body. The footage from the crime scene was a bit blurrier than the usual material. Perhaps for the better, since there was a body of a young girl hanging a short distance from the camera. This time, the girl was not laid out in a bed of flowers. Instead, she was nailed face down to the tree, her arms, probably broken in quite a few spots, tied to the back of her neck in a way that made it look like she was making an upside-down heart. She was facing away from the camera, her face turned to the tree, hidden from view. Her long blonde hair, stained with blood, cascaded down to the ground, where it sank into a puddle of blood.

Daryl felt shivers run down his spine.

“Shit, is that the Greene girl? Maggie’s sister?” Ryan almost shouted, and panic settled in Dixon’s stomach.

No. It couldn’t be.

He had seen her no more than twelve hours before, laughing, playing dumb games on a beach with her friends. She had left with her friends in a car, hopefully to be dropped off either at her place or theirs.

It wasn’t her.

But didn’t that top look familiar? Black and lacy? Wasn’t she wearing an exact copy of it?

Daryl cursed, reaching for his phone.

It wasn’t her, he repeated to himself. He was sure.

But his hands were shaking so much that the phone almost slipped out of his grip. Daryl tried finding Rick’s name in it, but the letters were all wrong, and his eyes were losing focus.

He shouted at her. Again.

Daryl hadn’t meant to talk to her—not like this, not when everything was already boiling up inside him—but there she was, crouched down on the edge of the woods, her pants halfway down as she squatted behind some bushes. He stopped dead in his tracks, watching as she jolted upright the second she noticed him, her face going red as she scrambled to pull her shorts up, nearly stumbling over the twigs and leaves at her feet.

Any other day, he’d have laughed. He might have cracked a grin at her clumsy surprise, at the quick flush that swept over her cheeks as she fumbled with the buttons. But all he felt now was a bitter tension, a frustration that simmered into anger as he stared at her. He wanted to leave, to let it all go. But then she spoke, and Daryl let his frustration spill out, his voice rising as he threw accusation after accusation her way, letting his anger speak in place of the vulnerability he didn't want to admit.

He had been angry at her since he first saw her taking that drink from across the beach, and now, knowing she must have babbled to her friends about kissing him — the image of her kissing Zach still fresh in his mind—he thought: All the more reason to tell her off.

Bullshit. You've been angry ever since you gave in to the temptation of opening those goddamned texts from her. One by one, they spelled out her sympathy toward him, trying to absolve him of the guilt.

It’s okay to like me back, Daryl. I’m not some kid, you know? said one of them. But the one that haunted him the most came after it: And I get it if you don’t want this, but if you do…  don’t shut me out, okay? We can figure this out together, see where it goes. I'd really like that. 

The phone slipped again, almost falling to the ground. Daryl grabbed it more firmly and tried again. This time, he managed to press the ‘call’ button and put the phone to his ear.

It couldn’t be her.

He closed his eyes for just one second, trying to breathe, to calm down, but failing miserably. He was vaguely aware of Ryan saying something to him, but he didn’t care. The flashes of their argument from last night appeared before his eyes unbidden.

What is this? Some fuckin’ bet you have goin’ on? To fuck some mean asshole biker?!

Daryl, stop! It’s not like that! You know that!

Not like that, huh?! The hell you’re sendin’ me those texts for then?!

An annoyingly brittle woman informed him that the caller was unreachable, and Daryl swore under his breath, his feet already taking him to his bike.

It wasn’t her. It couldn’t be her.

Where did they say the body was found? He couldn’t remember. At that moment he couldn’t remember what the last thing he’d said to her was either.

“Don’t matter,” he mumbled to himself, jumping on his bike. He wasn’t sure if he’d said anything to Ryan before rushing out either.

What he did remember was his resolve crumbling, the sweet smell of her perfume enveloping him as he pulled her closer against all reason. She had asked if he was jealous, as if he had any right to be. As if this thing between them was much more than a few drunken fumbles. Much more than him fucking it all up again and again.

He was on his way to starting the bike when the thought occurred to him that he hadn’t tried calling her yet.

Daryl found the number and pressed the button before he could talk himself out of it.

Just pick up, girl.

Those texts weren’t about that, and you don’t get to make it into some filthy, shameful thing just because you can’t accept someone might like you!

Beth’s voice sounded in his head, louder than the rumble of his bike. Daryl knew they weren’t. That’s what he hated about them the most. If she was just some horny bitch trying to get with him, he would know how to handle it. If all she wanted was to go down and dirty with him, like he’d suggested she wanted, that would be easier. But he couldn’t quite wrap his head around anyone wanting anything more with him, most of all someone like her. Even if she hadn’t put a name to how exactly she wanted to figure it out with him, Daryl had a pretty good idea of what a girl like that might want.

And it wasn’t sex.

No, it was much scarier than that.

But making it about sex only was easier. Bringing her down to his own level. Making it into something disgusting, just like she said.

And if you don’t stop askin’ for it, runnin’ around in your little goddamn shorts, gettin’ pissed and horny left and right, you’ll end up in a ditch somewhere! That what you want?!

And what if she did end up...

No.

The phone rang.

“You drunk right now?” he asked her, dodging her question. How could he answer her when he’d never felt jealous of anybody before? What did he know about that? All he knew was that she was driving him mad.

And it rang.

Beth’s eyebrows furrowed, and her lips twitched when he pulled his thumb away from them. She brushed her tongue over her lips, as though chasing the feel of him on her skin, before she spoke softly:

“No.”

The answer surprised him. Not because he thought differently, but because he was sure she was going to fight him on answering her own question first. Beth liked questioning him—that was one of the things he found so unbearable about her. She just couldn’t let him off the hook, could she?

“I was a bit tipsy, but—um—not anymore.”

Daryl nodded, bringing his eyes back to hers, a foolish, reckless idea taking root in his head as he stared at her. Just once, he told himself, just this once.

And it rang.

“Good,” he said, swallowing audibly, his voice breaking from tension. He wasn’t either. There was nothing he could blame it on. No excuse other than his own screwed-up mind urging him to give her the taste of what she said she wanted. To see how those kisses would taste with both of them sober this time.

It was getting dark already, but he could still see the way her eyes were flickering across his face, full of something he didn’t want to put a name to. It made his breath catch in his chest.

“Fuck,” he cursed under his breath, ending the call and starting another right away. “Just pick up, goddamn it, pick up, girl.”

Beth didn’t.

“You have to stop,” he uttered silently next, watching as she exhaled a shaky breath, surprised by another change in the conversation. Beth didn’t know there was a method to this madness, a reason he was saying that now other than just to confuse her. Her chest was heaving, pupils dilated and eyes dark, watching him right back, her body gravitating toward him. “You have to promise me you’ll stop sendin’ me those texts, alright?”

“But if you want…”

“I can’t.” His voice broke slightly from emotion as he gestured between them. “This thing? Ain’t gonna happen. It’s…”

“Wrong. You think it’s wrong,” she finished for him, a hurt look in her eyes, and Daryl could only nod.

It took him a moment to respond. Words had come to him much easier when he was drunk, and even then, it felt awfully nerve-wracking to voice his thoughts like this. He’d never done that before—not really, not like this—but there was no other way around it.

“Yeah, that’s why you need to promise you’ll stop.”

Beth shook her head, but when he urged her on, her name escaping him in a quiet huff, she finally managed, just as quietly:

“Yeah, okay. If that’s… if that’s what you really want, I’ll stop.” She swallowed, her eyes darting away from his face, tears pooling in them. She didn’t let them escape, though. “Promise.”

“Good girl.” He didn’t mean to say it like that, only realized it wasn’t the best wording when her eyes snapped right back to his, dark, full of yearning. It was insane, thinking it was all for him. All because of him.

No matter how fleeting it would be, no matter how soon she’d realize just how undeserving he was of all that attention or how much she’d inevitably hate him for what he’d done to her, in this moment she still looked at him like he was worth something. He couldn’t stop himself from wishing—just for a second—that he could be the man she thought he was. That he could take what she was offering without breaking her, without proving himself right about all the ways he’d screw it up.

But even if she was older, even if it wasn’t so inappropriate, Daryl knew he’d never be what she wanted him to be. He was too broken, too set in his ways, and whatever she saw in him would eventually fade.

She deserved better, he thought, even as he leaned in, his breath hitching the moment their noses brushed.

“Daryl…” she croaked, a mix of emotions crossing her face. He was taking her for another spin, making a mess of things again with mixed signals—he was well aware—but he couldn’t help it. Another proof of how screwed up he was.

She was staring at him, her eyes burning, searching and questioning, as they flickered between his lips and his eyes. Their breaths mingled when she slowly leaned in too, the space between them becoming even smaller.

He wasn’t entirely sure yet if this was really what he intended to do. He must have lost his mind, thinking this was a good idea, but the damage was already done. He’d already crossed the line when he first touched her, kissed her, and let her touch him back. What harm could another kiss possibly do?

Her lips trembled slightly as he brought his thumb to them again, brushing them almost hesitantly this time. A soft desperate noise escaped him against his will and there was no hesitation when, a moment later, he closed the gap between them, replacing his finger with his mouth.

Daryl wasn’t really sure where he was going until he pulled his bike to a stop at the Greenes’ driveway. The storm of emotions led him to the door, the kiss they’d shared the night before frozen in his mind.

Beth’s lips were warm and soft against his as she moved with him, responding to the caress instantly. The kiss wasn’t hurried or desperate the way their first one was, but it was just as deep, just as enthralling. His hand trailed down to cup her jaw, holding her in place as if in fear that she might drift away, and Beth’s fingers curled into the fabric of his shirt, pulling him closer, as if she shared that sentiment.

Daryl had never kissed anyone just for the sake of kissing them before. Never even wanted to press his lips against someone else’s with the intention to only feel close, to let himself feel that strange spark between them. It had always been a means to an end for him, and if there was a possibility to opt out of it, he’d take it.

But this? This felt different. It was raw and untamed, and it made him feel things he wasn’t prepared for.

He was just about to knock when he heard a neigh of a horse somewhere to his right. He turned around quickly, and his eyes fell on the open barn doors. A loud, familiar laugh came from behind it, and it should’ve been enough to stop him in his tracks, to make him realize that he was overreacting. It wasn’t. Not nearly enough.

Beth’s fingers threaded through his hair, and Daryl melted into her touch, his hand sliding down to hold lightly onto her waist as he deepened the kiss, his tongue slipping into her inviting lips, taking what wasn’t his. The kiss quickly turned from tender to desperate after that. Beth tasted like ripe summer fruit—sweet, fleeting, intoxicating—and it made him ache, deep in his chest, made him want more of her. She made a noise, a silent whimper, and he could've sworn it travelled through his whole body, making him shiver. 

A desperate sound escaped him in response to it, and Daryl’s hand slid lower, gripping her hip harder, pulling Beth even closer. The heat of her body pressing into him, the way her lips moved with an urgency matching his own, her scent—something floral mixed with the salt of the water she’d taken a swim in before— was driving him wild. Daryl just couldn’t get enough of it, couldn’t get enough of her.

He kissed her harder, deeper, as if he could lose himself in her, just for a moment, just for this one time. His other hand tangled in her hair, gripping it tightly as he tilted her head to make the kiss even deeper, more filthy. His pulse quickened when she whimpered again. Every part of him was alive with the sensation of her and it still wasn't enough.

“Beth?!” The voice came from the edge of the forest, and they drew back just far enough to meet each other’s eyes, both breathing heavily, still inches apart, flushed and overwhelmed. “Beth!?”

His heart was still beating fast, threatening to jump out of his chest as he ran to the barn. And if he told himself afterward that the only reason he rushed to her like this was because he was worried sick that Beth Greene’s death would put him behind bars to serve a lifetime, that was a necessary lie.

When the third call came, another voice joining the first, Daryl stepped back, letting go of her. His heart was still pounding, his face flushed, and his mind reeling from what had just transpired. He turned away from her briefly, his eyes closing for a second. Calm down, he told himself.

“Daryl?” Beth whispered, still standing in the same spot he had left her. Her voice sounded different—breathless and edged with a quiet desperation. It was doing things to him he’d rather not name.

“Just go,” Daryl said gruffly, his hand coming up to cover his face, trying to rub the ghost of her kiss off his lips. He didn’t look at her, not outwardly. Somehow, he knew that if he let himself look, if he let himself see her, he’d be lost.

But as he listened to her walking away, leaves and twigs shuffling under her feet, he realized the damage was already done.

The girl standing in the barn had her back turned to him, but it didn’t matter; he recognized her instantly. Daryl could feel his legs faltering the moment he laid eyes on her. She was all right—that was the first thing that registered as she started turning to him, probably tipped off by his unusually loud breathing.

“Daryl?” she asked, surprised. Her cheeks were a little red, either from the sun, riding a horse, or both. Some of her hair had gotten loose from the two neat braids, and dirt marred her T-shirt and chin, with a forgotten leaf stuck to the top of her head. Daryl had never seen anyone more beautiful.

“What are you doing here?”

Good question. What was he doing here, exactly? Except panicking for no good reason?

She stepped closer, leaving her horse behind in the stall and surprising the hell out of him with how unperturbed she seemed by his sudden appearance. Her eyebrows were pinched in worry, her hands flexing nervously at her side, but her voice bore no resentment, no contempt.

They had fought, and it wasn’t pretty—both times—and then, like the asshole he was, he had gone and kissed her right after telling her that this thing between them wasn’t going to happen, right after rejecting her again. But here she was, reaching out to him as if it all didn’t matter.

Her fingers found his bicep and squeezed reassuringly. It was that gentle touch that got him talking.

“I…” His voice came out even raspier than usual, but there was nothing he could do about it. He tried again. “Another girl was murdered.”

She gasped at the news, but he didn’t leave her much time to react.

“She... I saw it on TV. I couldn’t see 'er face, but she had your hair and your fuckin’ top, and I just…”

He cut himself off, realizing that he was babbling. He should never have come here. So what if some girl died? He had no business being here. Not after all the stupid shit that had happened between them. Definitely not after he shouted at her last night. Not after he took advantage again, kissing her when he knew she wanted much more than that. When he knew he wasn’t going to give it to her.

“Oh,” Beth’s voice interrupted the swirl of his thoughts. He was expecting pity but instead found her looking at him in that funny way she had when he said something that surprised her.

She had looked at him the same way the first time she saw his apartment, then again when they were sitting side by side in his kitchen, eating pancakes and joking inappropriately. And then it just kept happening, kept appearing on her face from time to time as she looked up at him, as if there was something peculiar about him, something she’d never expected to find.

She was wrong, though. Whatever she was thinking, she was just being naïve. There was nothing peculiar about him.

Daryl was actually close to storming off and leaving her without another word when she moved again, her small body pressing into his in a delicate, shy hug.

Overwhelmed, he let himself have this. Let the warmth radiating from her spread through his bones and attach itself right in his heart. It was still hammering in his chest—a ruthless little thing—but at least his breathing evened out slowly, his chest rising and falling in sync with hers.

As he raised his hands to hug her back, pressing her even more snugly to him with his chin resting on the top of her head, he finally felt like he could breathe again. Only now. Only with her safe in his arms.

Daryl had no idea how long they stayed like that before Beth moved back a little to look up at him, a warm glint in her eyes. He reached out then, slowly, so as not to spook her, and pulled the small leaf out of her hair. His actions made Beth gasp.

The air between them crackled, suddenly thick with the remnants of yesterday’s kiss as he gazed down at her, still standing so awfully close to him. For a moment nothing happened, and then Beth cleared her throat and asked:

“So, you wanna come in for a drink of water?" He just kept looking at her, his own breath caught in his chest yet again, and after another bit of silence she added: "You look like you could use a glass, or three.”

The offer was so simple yet so unexpected. Why? Why did she still treat him like that? Even after all he’d said and done—all the mean, awful things he’d thrown at her, all the anger, all the rejection—she was still so irrationally nice to him.

He traced the lines of a small, if a little apprehensive, smile on her face for a moment before averting his eyes and stepping back quickly, before he could do something reckless again.

“I don’t, uh…” Daryl cleared his throat, fidgeting now that he didn’t have her to hold onto. “Think your parents will appreciate me inviting myself over like that.”

It was just one of the reasons; they both knew that. But it didn’t feel safe to mention the others. He didn’t want to fight again, having had enough emotion for one day. She was alive and well—that’s what counted. And now he should get back on his bike and drive away. Should stay away, like he promised himself he would.

Only, it was hard to move so soon after finding her.

“Good thing they’re not here then, yeah?” she said, chewing on her lower lip thoughtfully and bringing his attention down to where it shouldn’t be.

It didn’t help at all, he realized. Kissing her, letting himself indulge in this thing between them didn’t change a thing.

Daryl had already opened his mouth to refuse her offer when she made up her mind, moved into his personal space again, and took one of his hands in hers like it was nothing.

“Come on.”

Beth pulled him with her, heading toward her home, and Daryl followed, her hand warm and soft in his. Deep down, he knew he should refuse—perhaps go to Rick, try to find out about the girl who died. Not let Beth drag him home, where her parents could appear at any given time and discover that this one old redneck asshole was yet again hanging around their kid.

But he found it impossible to rip his hand away from hers, and before he knew it, he was inside the Greene house again.

Beth let go of his hand to close the door behind them and then smiled at him sheepishly. She brushed their fingers together again while passing him, and it sent a jolt of electricity through him, his hand almost snatching up to catch hers. Daryl cursed himself internally, holding back, taking a breath before starting to walk after her again.

Beth led him through the hall and living room to the rustic kitchen. The rooms were quiet, but still evoked feelings of domesticity and familial warmth, even without the residents around. Daryl hovered in the doorway, yet again feeling uncomfortable, and watched Beth opening and closing cabinets, stretching up to reach the top shelf that was almost out of her reach, her shirt riding up and exposing the soft skin of her lower back.

Daryl acted before he could fully process it, stepping behind her to grab the glasses above her head. As his hand brushed hers in the process, a jolt ran through him, but he quickly dismissed it.

“Here,” Daryl said, placing the glasses on the counter in front of Beth. The movement brought his chest to her back, effectively trapping her between his arms. He breathed in the scent of her shampoo again, and his breath caught as he realized too late what position he had put them in.

Beth let out a soft whimper, her face turning slightly in his direction as if she were tempted to look over her shoulder at him but wasn’t sure if she should. The sound—quiet, fragile—made something inside him tighten.

He stepped back quickly, clearing his throat and looking away for good measure. Beth breathed out a sigh, her movements jerky and rushed as she poured a glass of water for him and another for herself. Then she turned to him in one swift motion.

There was something measured, fake in her movements, as if she were trying to hold herself a certain way, covering her real feelings with a shaky smile. He didn't notice it before, but now that he did, it was hard to ignore.

“Here you go, Daryl.”

Daryl took the glass from her, Beth's warm fingers meeting his just for a brief moment. He shouldn’t be noticing that, he knew. Shouldn’t be looking at her at all, in fact.

But lately, it seemed his body had a mind of its own.

That had to end, though.

Daryl made himself avert his gaze from her baby blues and turned his attention to the water. He gulped it all in one go and was rewarded with her silly giggle—more a sign of nervousness than anything else.

“I guess you’ll be wanting more of that, huh?”

Daryl just nodded, and Beth poured him another glass. He made sure not to touch her again as she handed it back to him. They just drank in silence for a few seconds. Then Beth asked, her tone a little more serious, “What... What happened? With that girl you said you saw on TV?”

He shrugged.

“Don’t know exactly. Rick didn’t answer my phone, and the news ended before I could…” Get my act together, he wanted to say, but he stopped himself. No reason to make an even bigger fool of himself. It was enough that he had basically run to her the second he saw the news, like some kind of lovesick fool.

Now that he thought about it, the girl that was hung didn’t look like Beth exactly. The second girl from the pictures they found in the barn, Susane Morgan, was two years younger than Beth and wore her hair in a similar manner to hers, but shorter. Susane was a bit smaller than Beth, too, and while Beth was young-looking for her age, Susane was doing everything in her power to appear older. Could she look similar enough to confuse him like that? Not normally, but nothing about his initial reaction to the news was normal. It was as if his brain detached from the rest of his body the moment the possibility that it could be her, dead like he’d said the night before, appeared.

He cleared his throat, starting again. “I’ll try getting a hold of Rick. They didn’t say her name, only that it happened last night, I think.”

“You think?”

“I got distracted,” he murmured, his cheeks warming up under her careful gaze. He started to fidget, now truly ready to bolt. “Shoulda…”

“Can we talk about it?” she stopped him, the words from her first message to him—the only one he’d read before going away for his little hunting trip—freezing him in place.

“About what?” he questioned, biting into the skin of his thumb. Beth watched him with big doe eyes, blush creeping on her cheeks. He instantly regretted asking her. He should’ve just run from there when he had the chance. But surely, she didn’t want to talk about…

“We kissed and…”

Yep, she did. The tips of his ears caught on fire, a familiar nervous energy settling in his bones. He really didn’t want to know where that sentence was going.

“Ain’t happenin’ again.”

She looked up at him, her own fidgeting stopping as she seemed to recognize that sharp, unyielding tone that could very quickly lead to another heated argument. All he was doing lately was shouting at her, and here she was, trying yet again to have a conversation.

He flinched as he realized that no one had ever taken so many chances on him. Nobody even tried before, and Daryl wasn’t sure what to make of it now that someone did. All those kind words she sent him during the last week went unanswered, and to make matters even worse, he was cruel to her the night before, turning those sweet texts into something she should be ashamed of. He knew that.

But what else was he supposed to do? She was so damn young and naïve, had her whole life before her, and even though he admired her stubbornness, her spirit, she was wrong about him. Wrong to like him this way. Wrong to like him at all. And even though she explained some of it to him in her texts, he still had trouble wrapping his head around it. The girl had lost her mind. Didn’t know what she was trying to get herself into.

“Yeah, you keep sayin’ that, but then…” she started again, her soft voice and cautious look sending him into panic. He knew right away what she was going to say. He said that and kissed her right after, like a total ass. “You kissed me, Daryl.”

It was hardly the first of his offenses, too.

There were also those words, spoken when he was drunk and out of his own mind. They were haunting him every single day, just like he knew kissing her again, sober, would. Telling her he liked having her pressed to him, touching him, that he wanted to kiss her back, that he thought about it when she came to the garage two days after she was drugged… that was something he was definitely going to hell for. And that was only the beginning of the things for which he would be condemned, the list only getting longer with every single interaction he had with her.

Now he also had to add tripping Zach up when he pushed his fucking tongue into her mouth to it, as if Daryl had any right, any say in who she was supposed to kiss. Good thing she didn’t realize, good thing Merle took the blame for it when Zach eventually got himself up from the ground and turned to them fuming. Nobody was going to argue with Merle, not even if they saw with their own two eyes that it was all Daryl. And Merle—God bless his brother and his aversion to talking about feelings—didn’t even ask Daryl why. Perhaps he already knew anyway.

Daryl wasn’t proud of it, but when he wrapped his own hands around her on that beach, the blinding rage he felt looking at Zach kissing her was replaced with warmth. And something else he’d never felt before: possessiveness. It manifested itself in the way he held onto her later, in the way he kissed her, as if she belonged to him, as if he could erase Zach’s lips on hers with his own.

If he didn’t kiss her again, if the only thing she could question were his drunken words, though, this conversation would be much easier. He could picture himself saying, “Don’t matter what I said. Was fuckin’ drunk, talking outta my goddamned ass,” a necessary lie to end her line of questioning. It seemed way more difficult to explain that second (or third? Did the first time she kissed him even count?) kiss.

He made sure she was sober. He knew he was. And he did that, thinking they deserved this at least: one kiss not tainted by any drugs or other poisons. But it felt stupid now, just a simple excuse, and he wasn’t brave enough to explain his reasoning to her.

“I know I ain’t makin’ it easy,” the words fell off his lips at a fast pace as he knew if he didn’t rush it, he would’ve never gotten it out. He wasn’t looking at her, too ashamed of the memories flooding his mind. “I did many things I ain’t proud of, girl. I—um—I follow my blood, you know, make a lotta mistakes ‘cause of that. But what I said yesterday still stands. Okay?”

A grimace crossed her face, and as she pressed her lips into a thin line, averting her eyes from him, for a second he was sure she was going to start crying. Beth nodded, though, swallowing whatever words she had for him.

That was for the better. She should go and be with Zach if rough bikers were what she was into. The thought made his blood boil, but Daryl squashed that feeling before it could blow in his face. He had no right, he reminded himself.

“Good.” He nodded as well.

Daryl kept saying that too, but it wasn’t good at all. He should’ve felt lighter, knowing Beth finally understood and would stop sending him those texts. But the uncomfortable feeling that settled itself in his gut didn’t leave. In fact, it only grew and grew the more distance he tried putting between them. It was torture. But Daryl was nothing if not used to life being that way. He could add another flavor of pain to it, no problem. Only, he didn’t like the hurt he saw in her eyes.

Daryl turned to leave all the same, nothing more for him to do here. He was halfway to the door when Beth decided to speak again, and the throbbing in her voice stopped him in his tracks. Daryl should just go, should leave without looking back. That was what a reasonable, responsible person would do. But he was honest when he said he was following his blood, doing things on a whim instead of listening to reason.

“I’m sorry.”

Daryl furrowed his brows, looking back at her. Beth didn’t catch his eyes, instead staring somewhere to her right, her eyes tearing a little after all.

“I’m just so sorry for yesterday, Daryl. I should have never told them about it. It was only two of my friends, no one else, I promise, but I should’ve known better. I shouldn’t have…” Her voice wavered, her lip trembling, not much differently from the way it did yesterday before he kissed her. It was as if the moment she started talking about it, the dam broke loose, the emotions she so desperately wanted to hide spilling out of her in a cruel callback to the way his anger did the evening before. “So many people in this town would have you lynched for what happened to Sophia, and here I am throwing myself at you like some… like some horny bitch.”

Daryl flinched.

“Hey, hey, none of that.” He moved before he could really think, the insult she threw at herself punching him right where it hurt the most. It was enough that he despised himself; he never wanted her to feel that way about herself. But then again, he wasn’t necessarily careful with his words, right? Didn’t he call her a bitch a few times too? He did, didn’t he? And the world was reminding him now, showing him just why he could never be good enough for her.

Beth looked up at him, startled, and he stopped short of reaching out to touch her cheek. He shouldn’t put his hands on her, not even now, but, hell, did he want to.

“You did nothin’ wrong, Beth. It’s all…”

My fault. It’s all my fault.

Beth snorted, her eyes full of tears now, the façade she presented to him before dropping.

“Nothing wrong? Are you kidding me? It’s like you said, I keep putting myself in danger, making wrong bloody calls every single time. Talking to strangers, not being careful enough, drinking and partying like…” Her voice broke on a sob. "And if something happened? If someone really wanted to take me, and you… you wouldn’t be close by? I can’t defend myself. I’m just some helpless little girl! No wonder you don’t want anythin’ to do with me. I can’t…”

“Stop.”

Daryl hated it—the way all his hurtful words really got to her, as if it mattered what he thought, what he said. He was just some nobody, definitely not someone one should look up to, definitely not someone one should listen to either. He threw so many words out there only with the intention of hiding himself from others, to steer their attention away from his own vulnerabilities. It wasn’t the healthiest way of coping, he knew, but that’s just who he was. He couldn’t change that, and that was precisely why Beth should keep away from him. One of the reasons, at the very least.

“No. You were right, last night. I didn’t even think about it. I just went out with my friends, wanting to get drunk and stupid, like I wasn’t almost kidnapped a few weeks back.”

Another sob wracked through her body, and it pulled on Daryl’s heartstrings in the worst kind of way. He knew he was the one responsible for her tears, and it bothered him, but he felt helpless. He wasn’t good with tears, wasn’t good with turning bad emotions into good ones—only the other way around. So now he could only watch the consequences of his actions wreak havoc in real time, torn between touching her, comforting her, and running away.

“I lied to my parents. Again! I wasn’t careful. Again! Wasn’t thinking about safety or bad guys. Again! And today… some girl died. Again. And it’s awful… And, you know what’s even worse? The only thing I could think of when you told me was it could’ve been me. That poor girl, God! And that monster is still out there… And what if the next time I’m not so lucky? What if you’re not there to save me? Then I’m just another dead girl!”

“No.”

Daryl shook his head, his hands coming up to finally take her cheeks into his palms, forcing her to stay still. Beth took a shaky breath, jumping a little at the touch she didn’t expect.

“No, you ain’t. I was… I was outta fuckin’ line yesterday, alright? And before too. I just got… just started talkin’ shit again, alright?”

Beth’s cheeks were soft and wet under his hands, her lip trembling, and her baby blues searching his eyes as if he held answers to all her questions. They were standing closer than necessary. He could smell the sweet mix of her perfume and that damn shampoo—sweat, flowery, then a hint of something earthy. He could feel the warmth of her body, just a ghost of it, so close yet so far from him.

Her hands came up to his, and she embraced his wrists, making him shudder.

“But you were right,” she whispered, her breathing evening out as his thumbs stroked her cheeks in the kind of reassurance he’d never offered to anyone before. It was making him feel strange, some ancient instinct telling him to bolt, to put a stop to this. But as she kept gazing up at him, he found he was unable to, rooted to his spot.

He cleared his throat, forcing the words out despite the weight in his chest.

“Wasn’t. You ain’t stupid, and you didn’t do nothin’ wrong.” He paused, trying to find the right words. “Was just havin’ fun, like you should. I was wrong for tellin’ you off for it.” He took a step closer, his voice lowering as he tried to make her understand. “Not your fault the world is full of them bad people. You just gotta be careful. That don’t mean you can’t have fun, okay?”

She nodded, although hesitantly, and he wished he could admit to feeling so jealous, so irked by her kiss with Zach, that he had just lashed out at her for no reason at all. More than that, all that yelling, all those heated arguments they’d had lately, were only because of his exasperation with himself. He wasn’t really mad at her, only ever at himself, but admitting it out loud was out of the question. The words would never leave his throat, even if he tried. Daryl knew himself well enough to not even try. And what good would it do to tell her that he was being mean to her because he couldn’t stand her being so nice to him? Because for the first time in his life, he really wanted something, and it was only his goddamned luck that it was something he couldn’t have?

“I just wish I could… change, you know?”

Daryl grunted in response, slowly pulling his hands away from her face. He had to put some distance between them, or else he might do something stupid. Again. She didn’t let go of him, however, and they ended up in a strange stalemate. The feeling of her fingers digging into the naked skin of his wrists would haunt him for hours to come, but he wasn’t strong enough to pull away entirely.

“It feels like everyone has to always take care of me, like I can’t even make a decision without my family, like… I constantly need saving one way or another, and I’m just so tired of it. Of things just happening to me, like I have no agency of my own.”

Was that the true reason behind wanting him? Did she want to break free and do something reckless for once—something nobody would allow? Make a decision and go through with it to show herself that she was an independent person? It did seem more believable than the reasons she gave him in those texts. More believable than her liking him for real.

I’ve never enjoyed talking with anyone as much as I do with you, said one of the first messages she sent him. And I’m not going to lie, I loved kissing you—not because it’s exciting to kiss a rough, dangerous biker, but because it’s you.

What the hell did that even mean? It being him should be a bad thing. She didn’t know what she was talking about.

“I told you, you’re still young, got a lotta time to change and start makin’ your own decisions.”

“But what if I don’t?”

He shook his head again at her, ready to tell her yet again to stop—to not say things like this. Not only because they were hurting her, but also because they were making him feel antsy. Some twisted part of him would love to put his arms around her, protect her from everything and everyone, never let anyone else get to her, never let go. And he didn’t have much expertise in the department of relationships with others, but it seemed toxic, wrong, to feel that way.

They watched each other silently for a beat or two, him gathering his thoughts, trying to find the right words, and her lost somewhere in her mind as well, fighting a battle of her own. When she finally spoke, she surprised him again.

“What if you teach me?”

“Teach ya?”

Confusion marred his features, but that didn’t deter her, newfound determination bringing light back to her reddened face and puffy eyes. And wasn’t it sick that she was falling apart right in front of him and yet she’d never looked more beautiful to him?

“Yes, teach me. Show me how to defend myself. I’m sure a guy like you knows how to fight.”

She said it with such conviction, he had to snort.

“A guy like me, huh?”

She blushed under his gaze, but a small smile appeared on her face, and this time it seemed honest—not dimmed with barely hidden sadness, not the way the other ones she’d offered him that day felt.

“Well, folks in this town don’t fear you for no reason, do they? I was there when those guys started running just because you stood next to me, you know?”

He did know. Remembered that night too well, the first of many bad choices he’d made when it came to her. Would they still end up here if he didn’t take her home then? If he’d gone back to Carol or insisted on dropping her back at that party she left? She was so trusting then too, not even thinking about it before pulling her goddamned pants down in front of him, as if he wasn’t believed to be the kind of scumbag to abuse women. The amount of trust she was giving him, even now, when he didn’t deserve it at all, was worrying, but it also made his heart swell.

“Mhmm.” He stepped away, suddenly needing some distance.

She stayed put, but her eyes followed him across the kitchen. Teaching her sounded like another one of these bad ideas that he’d had lately. He was supposed to stay away. Focus on finding the motherfucker that was killing these girls—that was a top priority—not spending more time with one Beth Greene. More than that, if the previous evening proved anything, it was that this was dangerous.

“Is that a yes, Mr. Dixon?”

His cheeks reddened under her scrutinizing gaze.

Told ya not to call me that.

We can’t be around each other. I told you that too.

“Fine. I’ll teach ya.”

Chapter 19: Come on, spread your legs just a lil’ more for me.

Summary:

Beth becomes one with the heat of the Summer, and Daryl doesn't seem fazed.

Notes:

Uff, this week has been tough – I thought I'd have to wait until Sunday to add the next chapter, but thankfully, not! :) It's here, and it's... getting hot, so consider yourselves warned. Beth is losing her mind a little. But who could blame her, right?
As always, thank you for all your lovely comments! You’re the best! <3 I love reading about which parts got you excited and all that! <3

***

She didn’t do it on purpose, she told herself as she parked her car at the edge of the woods, far from her farm. She hadn’t cried in front of Daryl just to make him agree to meet her, but a mean voice in her head (that, yet again, sounded suspiciously close to Maggie’s) told her that’s what she had been looking for the whole time: an excuse to keep seeing him, even though he wasn’t too keen on the idea. Was she a bad person for it?

Daryl was already there, leaning on his bike and smoking. As her eyes followed the movement of his chest as it rose with his breaths, she realized she was in way too deep. His bare biceps glistened in the Georgia sun, his fringe dropping onto his forehead. Pretty soon, it would reach his eyes, she thought, her heart skipping a beat when he shot her a quick glance. It was brief, probably just to assess whether she was dressed properly for their task, but it made her shiver all the same.

Daryl wordlessly indicated for her to follow him. Against her friends’ wishes and her parents’ teachings, she did, and she’d never been happier to do a bad thing than she was at the end of that day.

They walked for a few minutes, getting further and further away from civilization. Daryl didn’t stop or even check if she was walking behind him until they reached a small clearing. It was there that he finally faced her again.

“Well now, I ain’t never taught nobody nothin’ in my whole dang life, so y’all best not go expectin’ too much, yeah?”

She opened her mouth to argue that she was sure he was going to be a great teacher, but he didn’t let her, his quick words betraying his nerves.

“We can tackle this a couple’a ways, but I reckon the best is I go on an’ grab ya, you show me what you’d do, then I’ll show ya somethin’ that works a mite better. We’ll keep at it till ya get the hang of it. How’s that sound?”

Perfect. It sounded perfect. They started off pretty easy, with Daryl grabbing her arms and her trying to get his hands off, unsuccessfully. The hold he had on her forearms wasn’t enough to hurt or bruise her, but it was purposefully strong enough to make it hard to shake off. She struggled with him for a while, and it wasn’t until frustration started oozing from her that he finally took pity on her and started showing her the right moves.

They repeated the moves slowly for some time, but after a while, he started making her go faster and faster. It was hard to focus when he was the one touching her. She wasn’t anywhere near good at it yet, but Daryl still praised her every time she managed to free herself from his grip, even when it took ages. The only point of contact between them during that first practice was their hands, and still, Beth felt a flame rise and burn inside her stronger and stronger each time he touched her.

“Who taught you all that?” she asked him on their way back to their cars a little over an hour later, her skin still burning from his touch, her mind reeling. She needed a distraction, or else she was going to combust from just imagining what could happen during the next lesson.

Daryl shrugged, his eyes avoiding her, as if looking at her outside of the clearing might burn him.

“Nobody,” he uttered quietly. “Had to learn the hard way, you know? On the streets, fightin’ some guys that were lookin’ to hurt me. Took years to get good at it.”

Beth nodded, something painful squeezing her guts at the thought of him enduring so many beatings that he could learn from his mistakes and get really good at it in turn.

“So, what you’re sayin’ is, there’s no chance I can learn to fight well in the span of, I don’t know, the next two months?” she asked, her mind briefly jumping to the end of the summer. In two months, she was going to leave for college, get really busy with her schedule—it seemed like such a short amount of time to have with him like this.

“You can learn somethin’, sure enough. Takes years to perfect it, but if you put in the work, shoot, even a couple months’ll do to see some real improvement. Least a little, anyhow.”

Beth bit her lip, her heart leaping as she asked carefully:
“Put in the work, you mean like, what, train three, four times a week?”

Daryl glanced at her, his eyes unreadable again, and she wondered if he could see right through her in that moment. Did he know she was just looking for an excuse again, to keep meeting him as often as possible?

He surprised her when he nodded, though, his voice rough and quiet as he said:
“Yeah, four times a week oughta do it. Might just see some results, if ya got it in ya.”

Beth couldn’t help but smile, hopeful.
“Could we do that? Four times a week?”

They reached the edge of the woods, and Daryl stopped, his gaze unmoving and calculating on her face. Beth held back a shiver.

“Yeah, sure.” He shrugged, feigning indifference, but she could see the way his chest moved with a shaky exhale and the way he pulled his hand up to his mouth in a nervous habit just a moment later as he muttered: “Why not?”

Why not indeed, Beth thought again that night, the smile not wanting to leave her face. She didn’t try to kid herself that what she had in mind when she asked him to meet her so often was getting really good at fighting. Still, she tried her best, wanting his approval, wanting to show him that she wasn’t just another dead girl, that she could be a badass. Perhaps that she could be the kind of woman he would want to date. So, no matter how frustrating it was to struggle with throwing his hands off her, she pushed through—trying and trying again when it didn’t work. And when he grabbed her yet again in the middle of their second lesson, and she didn’t even stop to consider her actions before throwing his hands off her, she jumped with happiness.

“I did it! Daryl, I…” She made the mistake of turning around a little, going for a spin, and before she knew it, she was in Daryl’s strong grasp. This time, he circled her arms with his forearm, her back pressing to his front.

“Ain’t nobody said you were done, girl. Folks ain’t gonna let up on ya just ‘cause you wriggled outta their grip.” Daryl’s breath ghosted over her ear, the sensation raising goosebumps on her skin. His body was solid and warm behind her, and she had to hold back a whimper when he pushed his tanned arm down on the exposed skin of her collarbones and neck. “What are you gonna do now?”

She wiggled, trying to either stomp on his foot or punch him with her elbow, but he swiftly avoided each and every one of her attacks. He let her try a few times before his other hand snaked down and grabbed her by the hip, stilling her movements. Now their bodies were lined up from toes to head, with him crushing her into him forcefully enough for it to hurt a little. Just a little, and, as she was quickly finding out, just the perfect amount for it to also be pleasurable. If it was hard to focus before, now she felt the last sane thought leave her body.

Beth didn’t get a grip on her body quick enough to stop herself from backing right into him. His chest raised and fell rapidly in a fast intake of breath when she did that, and his voice trembled a little when he murmured:

“Yeah, that’s it, just like that, but a whole lot quicker and with more force. I’m pullin’ ya in close, so you gotta use that to throw me off balance. Once I go back, you grab my arm, lift it up a bit, an’ then sink your teeth into it. Like that.” She squirmed in the least graceful manner when he suddenly moved her hips for her, slightly away and back into him. His other hand loosened its hold on her collarbones, so she did what he told her—not biting, just putting her teeth on his flesh—but it was enough for him to lose his hold on her.

“Alright, now you can try that elbow move you was usin’ earlier to get me to back off a bit, then spin ‘round and either pop me square in the jaw or go for the jewels, or heck, do both. But if you really don’t want me followin’ after, the best thing to do is aim your kick right here.” He showed her his knee. “But not straight, on, comin’ at it from the side’ll do the trick. You land a few good kicks right here, and you can really mess up somebody’s knee. You got that?”

Daryl looked up at her from behind his hair, and all she could do in answer was nod. If he saw how much their closeness affected her, he didn’t show it.

“Come on, try it.”

He moved to stand behind her again, and she positioned herself in front of him. Beth knew he was going to touch her again, but when he did, it still pushed air out of her lungs. God help me. She wasn’t going to survive this, was she? Not if he was going to be like this at every single practice.

What is going on with you, Beth? she thought to herself, ashamed of how much Daryl being rough with her excited her. Her cheeks reddened, chest heaving as she let her eyes close for a sweet, torturous moment when he pressed their bodies together again. It was dangerous, daydreaming about him like this, when he was right behind her.

“Go on,” he told her, his voice hoarse, close to a whisper. She wished for him to drop his head a little lower, to feel that hot breath on the skin of her neck, to have him kiss her skin there, slightly above her collarbones, to have his hand move from where it was clasped on her shoulder to explore her body in a way nobody ever had.

She wished, and wished, and wished, but all she got during that first week of their training were four days of him touching her only to show her the right moves or play the role of the attacker. Never crossing the line she so desperately needed him to cross. Not lingering near, not letting himself be pulled into her the way he did back at the beach.

It was as if, after that last kiss they shared, Daryl decided not to let himself indulge in this anymore, and he was faring much better than she ever could. Stepping away from her every time they got too close, pulling his face away when she shivered, tickled by his breath, and not letting his hands touch her in any other way than was necessary for training. He kept staring at her, though, his eyes tracing her movements and studying her just a little too hard, too long, whenever she wasn’t looking, but never making a move, never giving her any sign that he was feeling the same tension that twisted inside her. It was maddening, his restraint, and every time he pulled away, it felt like she was losing a piece of herself—like she was waiting for something that might never come.

It left her hot, bothered, and more frustrated than she’d ever been. She was leaving their practice sessions with an almost painful throbbing between her legs and an itch she wasn’t able to get rid of, no matter what she did. No usual distractions worked. No amount of cooking, horse riding, hanging out with friends, or running errands for her parents could soothe her mind. Her skin was prickling, and she could swear she could still feel the press of his fingers hours, days even, after their meeting. She was becoming one with the heat of the summer.

They kept meeting at different times and intervals during the weekdays, the changes related to his work schedule, but Saturdays and Sundays were their fixed training days. He always seemed to have a lot of work on Mondays and Tuesdays, usually setting their training for Wednesdays, Thursdays, or Fridays. It was both a blessing and a curse to have him devote his time to her two or three days in a row, only to then not see him for another two days of the week. But it was the nights that were the worst.

Summer was in full blast now, and not only were the days hot and humid, the heat making brain cells evaporate, but the nights were not much better. Beth would toss and turn for hours, sweat trickling down her shirt and mind reeling. And it was when she lay in her bed on nights like this, feeling ghosts of his fingers tread through her skin, that she found herself giving in to the temptation.

Beth knew it was wrong. Daryl was her friend, a friend who agreed to help her even though she abused their relationship time and time again by throwing herself at him. She swore to herself, when they started training, that she wouldn’t do it again, wouldn’t make moves on him. That she would try and be good. But here she was, lying in her bed, her pajamas tossed away, chest heaving and eyes closed, as she trailed her fingers down her tummy, sliding between her legs, touching herself in a way she never even dared to think about before. Daryl's blue eyes fixed on her, dark and hungry, his lips glistening, red from kissing her, and tanned muscles wrapped around her in the sweetest of ways.

The press of her fingers on herself, even through her panties, finally brought her a little relief. She whimpered, picturing Daryl’s hands on her, holding her from behind like he did in the woods, his own fingers, much bigger than hers, skimming down her tummy and sneaking inside her shorts. Daryl just held his hand there for a moment, before he pushed her a little back, pressing her ass even more tightly into him, rubbing his jeans-clad cock on her asscheeks. She moaned at the sensation. The smell of his cologne mixed with oil and leather engulfed her; she could almost taste it on her tongue. And she could swear his breath was ghosting on the sensitive skin of her neck, his lips sucking on it as he teased her gently. Daryl pushed his other hand down her chest and cupped her breasts, his breath hitching. When she made another needy sound at that, Daryl offered her one of his silent groans and she could hear it almost as real as if he was next to her.

Come on, spread your legs just a lil’ more for me.

“Yes, Mr. Dixon,” she whispered into the night, a silent moan following her words. Beth, who was barely even aware that she had clasped her thighs shut around her own hand, slowly released them, opening up for him, just like he wanted.

Good girl.

The praise, uttered in his hoarse, low voice, almost too real, made her bite into her lower lip. Daryl’s finger grazed the hem of her panties from the side. Slowly, almost shyly, it grazed her lips before sliding his fingers between them. Beth cried out at the first contact of warm skin with her wet pussy.

Shh, don’t want anyone to hear, do ya, girl?

Daryl’s hand covered her mouth, keeping her from uttering another sound as his fingers started slowly, almost torturously, moving in small circles on her pussy. Up and down her clitoris, touching lightly at first, and then, when it didn’t feel like enough, a bit harder. Beth felt her whole body vibrate with the movement, the funny feeling down her tummy not so funny anymore. She whimpered with each stroke, her clitoris tingling in an entirely new way. Beth felt the tension build in her, the movements of Daryl’s imaginary fingers becoming almost too much, almost too fast. She moaned loudly when Daryl found the source of the heat that had been consuming her for months now, her entrance pulsing with heat. He didn’t press his finger in, just touched her there, and that was enough. She squeezed her legs shut again, her whole body trembling, as her first orgasm hit her.

Shame came a little later. When she was coming down from it, lying in bed with her eyes wide open, her heart pounding in her chest, breath heaving and her whole body still squirming from the new sensation. It felt so good. Better than anything she’d ever felt. And Daryl… Oh, Daryl.

Beth covered her face with a pillow. She wanted to scream.

After that, it was both worse and better to have him touch her during their practice. Worse, because the feelings she had for him were bursting at the seams, and she had to put all her willpower into not whimpering or moaning when he moved around her, positioning her body in the right way or pressing their bodies together during the fight. Better, because her new nightly activities were easing up at least some of the tension, making it all a bit more bearable.

It was wrong to picture him doing things to her, she knew, but once she crossed that line, there was no going back. It simply brought her too much pleasure to stop.

“Hey, you there?” Daryl snapped his fingers in front of her eyes. She blinked, realizing she had been staring at him for God knows how long instead of trying to wiggle herself out of the ropes he had tied around her wrists. It wasn’t their usual fighting practice, but Daryl told her he’d learned how to get himself out of things like these when he was a kid, and it had come in handy a few times. Beth didn’t ask about those times, not really sure if she wanted to hear about the tight spots he’d found himself in before meeting her. She was just glad he survived whatever life threw at him. “Did ya hear anything I said?”

Not really. She was too busy picturing him using that rope on her naked, tying her to his bed that she knew had the kind of headrest that would be perfect for it. Beth wondered if he’d ever had anyone tied to it before, or if she’d be the first in this imaginary scenario.

“No, sorry, I…”

“Listen, you gotta take this seriously, alright? Can’t have you comin’ around here and zonin’ out every damn time I’m tryin’ to explain somethin’.”

Beth felt her cheeks redden. It was true; she kept spacing out more since her nightly routine started. She just couldn’t help but wonder about all the sexual stuff she’d never found interesting before, and most often, she mused on what his fantasies were like, what he liked, how he would touch her, what he looked like without all these unnecessary clothes on...

“I’m sorry, I’m focusing now, okay? No more spacing out, yeah?”

Daryl eyed her carefully, his face unreadable. If she had to say what infuriated her the most about their new routine, it would be how calm he was about it all. As if it didn’t affect him at all to have her this close, to touch her and manhandle her like that. As if no sinful thoughts plagued his mind. No, Daryl was all about business since he took on the role of her mentor. He’d thrown tantrums, gotten drunk and pissy just because she kissed him not so long ago, but now he suddenly turned into Mr. Perfectly Fine. And Beth had to fight the urge to grab him and kiss him. Make him just as desperate for her as she was for him.

“Sure, go on an’ see if you can wiggle outta them ropes then,” he told her, his voice measured.

The ropes turned out to be her least favorite activity. Not only because there was no touching involved, but also because no matter how much she tried, she couldn’t get it quite right. He kept showing her, and when he did it, it looked easy enough, but the second the ropes were on her, she was mistaking directions, moving her hands in the wrong way, getting even more tangled in it. When he finally told her that they were going to get back to it, she released a relieved breath. Her happiness didn’t last long, because the next thing he told her was that he had to cut their lesson short that day anyway, because of some Feral Angels’ business.

“Hey, could you drop me off back in the city? I’m going to the drive-in cinema with the girls.” Shawn was going to pick her up later, as they had agreed, because he needed a car to drive up to meet his online girlfriend somewhere. He told her it wasn’t her business where, but he drove Beth to the city thinking she was meeting her girlfriends for some coffee before the cinema, when in fact, Daryl picked her up not even five minutes after Shawn left. She didn’t complain. He could keep his secrets as long as he didn’t want to dig into hers.

“Sure.”

They gathered their things and started walking back through the woods to his car, leaving the clearing she had come to love behind. As they walked, she talked his ear off, giddiness from their meetup and a desperate urge to postpone the end of it overcoming her entirely.

“When I was little, we would go to this cinema every Sunday, you know? Me, Mom, Dad, Maggie, and Shawn, but then everyone started growing up. Shawn preferred spending his time in front of the computer screen, and Maggie completely lost her mind once she went to high school. I mean, she was always a troublemaker, but suddenly she didn’t want to spend time with us at all, only interested in boys and parties. I guess I was so angry with her for it, for the longest time I did everything I could to not be like that, you know?”

“That’s why you didn’t drink before that time on the beach?” Daryl asked, and she smiled, happy that he was interested enough to interject.

“Yeah, that and my dad had alcohol problems when I was younger too, but… I think I mostly just had this image of myself. Everyone always praised me for being such a good girl.” She felt her cheeks redden at the phrase, now associated more with her late-night endeavors than anything else. She did love it when Daryl called her a good girl in her dreams, the way he did before he kissed her. The only thing that topped it was being called his girl. “And doing what’s right, going to church every Sunday and listening to all the ladies at church gatherings talk about Satan tempting young people to drink, do drugs, and have sex, made me feel like doing that would make me less of a Christian. I guess I just thought I wanted to be good, avoiding temptations and painting the picture of me everyone wanted to see. It felt nice, making people happy.”

She shrugged, not sure if she was explaining it the right way. Daryl hummed.

“You thought. So, you don’t feel that way no more?”

He glanced back at her, and she bit her lip, trying and failing not to blush. She pretended to think about it, silencing her treacherous heart that was trying to jump out of her chest.

“I don’t know. For a while, I just wanted to fit in, you know? I think that’s why I stayed with Jimmy, even though I knew I didn’t love him or want him. I just really wanted to be liked and praised and seen as someone good. But then things changed. My friends became interested in partying, boys, and sex, and Jimmy… Jimmy became obsessed with having sex too, and I guess I didn’t get it. Why was everyone so obsessed with doing bad things all of a sudden?” Daryl nodded, even though she knew she was pretty much rambling now. “But now… I want to try some things too. I don’t want to be this sheltered girl once I go to college, and I’m not really sure if I found it all bad for real, or if I was just projecting what other people think about it. I mean, I’m still not proud of drinking at the beach. It was bad of me, but…”

“Only bad thing ‘bout it was that damn piss-poor Peach Schnapps you had for your first drink.”

Beth snorted, not entirely minding this interjection. She was actually glad he wasn’t judging her for it. When he lashed out at her that night, he made her feel like a really bad person for drinking. She felt so guilty the next day, she could barely keep herself from crying the moment he entered the barn.

“Yeah? And what would you have me drink, Mr. Dixon?”

Daryl shrugged.

“Some Moonshine, maybe.”

She could definitely imagine Moonshine being his drink of choice. She heard from Maggie it was terrible, though.

“My dad always says you can go blind from that,” she told him and smiled when the corner of his lips moved a little in a barely-there smile.

“I can see just fine, girl.”

Warmth spread through her bones for no reason at all. They were walking hand-in-hand now that the path allowed for it, and she bumped into him, smiling at him cheekily.

“How old were you then? When you had your first drink, Mr. Moonshine?” Daryl snorted and bit into the inside of his mouth to keep himself from smiling. He liked when she acted this way, Beth noted at some point during their lessons. He always smiled when she gave him attitude. She couldn’t figure out why, but now that she knew, Beth kept doing it, as often as she could. Just to see him smile.

“Alright, let me guess. Fourteen?”

“Nah, more like seven.”

“Seven!? But that’s…” she stopped when he eyed her thoughtfully and finished, modulating her voice so that she wasn’t shouting anymore. “So young?”

Daryl shrugged.

“Yeah, I never had many friends, so I just followed Merle around whenever he was around. An’ he wasn’t, not much anyhow. In an' outta juvie most of his teen years. He was seventeen when he finally left home for good, was gone a while, but before he left, he came by to say goodbye. Took me to a party with his buddies. That’s when I had my first drink, smoked a little weed too. They all laughed watchin’ me try it, but Merle... he was damn proud. By the time he came back from his run, I was smokin’ weed like it was nothin’.”

Proud for drinking? Smoking weed? That sounded bad, but Daryl had a small smile on his face, and Beth wondered if that was one of the best memories from his childhood. She hoped not.

“I think my brother would be pissed if he saw me drinking. He thinks I’m still a kid, even now after I turned eighteen. I mean, I’m just one year younger than him anyway.”

She scrunched her nose saying that. Calling herself a kid in front of Daryl was not on her bingo card, but she kept doing it. Stupid.

“Maybe that’s a good thing.”

“How?”

“You got someone to watch your back. Someone to fight for ya.” He shrugged. “That’s good.”

Daryl didn’t get it, did he? She didn’t want protection. She wanted to be treated like a person, one who could make her own decisions, fight for herself.

“I can protect myself.” He gave her a look, and she rolled her eyes in response. “Okay, maybe not yet, but soon enough, yeah? You said it yourself, I’m a natural, learning moves like I was born for it.”

“Not what I said.” Daryl Dixon wouldn’t be caught saying a cheesy thing like that, but what he said on one of the other sessions they had this week sounded suspiciously close to it.

“But that’s what you meant,” she bumped into him again, and this time he bumped into her right back. She would land on her ass if he didn’t catch her in time, his hand clasping around her wrist and pulling her back to his side.

“You okay?”

“I dunno, Daryl, I think you have to kiss it better.”

His cheeks reddened, and she laughed even as she blushed as well.

“Shut up,” he murmured defensively, but didn’t protest when she laced their fingers together a moment later. Nor did he pull away, and when he slid his fingers higher to get a better grip on her hand, a pleasant buzz settled in her tummy. Butterflies. They were slowly becoming a constant in her life. Just like him. Beth hoped the summer would never end.

“What’re ya fixin’ to see?" he asked her once they were seated next to each other in his truck, driving to the city.

“I dunno, some romantic comedy.” Daryl scrunched his nose at that. “What? You don’t like romantic things, do you?”

“Not really, no.”

“Mhmm, what kind of movies do you like then?”

Daryl shrugged. He was doing it a lot, usually when he wanted to appear as if he didn’t care about something when, in fact, he did. That’s what she thought anyway.

“Dunno, never was much into movies. My old man busted our TV on one of his benders, couldn’t change the channel for years, was stuck on cartoons, nothin’ else. Merle loved that, though, not sure if it was ‘cause of the cartoons or ‘cause it was pissin’ off our dad. Me, I never got into ‘em. Then one day, ol’ Will Dixon brought home a new one, an’ it was all football games after that.”

“So what, you’re saying you never saw any movies? Not even in the cinema?” She hoped she didn’t sound judgmental, but it was hard to imagine someone who never watched anything. Movies were such a big thing in her own household; she couldn’t picture living without a TV screen or not going to the cinema once in a while.

“Nah, I did. Not enough to have a real favorite, but once we got here, Jess showed us his movie stash.” Beth watched him wave a hand as if to shoo away a fly, and she couldn’t help but smile when she thought about how much more comfortable he was with talking to her now than he was before they began their training sessions. This babbling of hers, which she did every time they were walking through the woods together, really crushed the ice. “We watched some of the classics, Die Hard, the Rocky movies, Rambo, Predators. An’ Carol, well, she drags me to the movies sometimes. We’ve seen a few things together. That one with this assassin—what’s it called? John Wick? Yeah, that kinda thing.”

“Oh, I love John Wick,” she told him with a smile. “The way he goes and kills everybody for his dog? Love that. I’d marry that guy in a heartbeat.”

Daryl spluttered at that. Beth blushed, realizing who exactly she was talking to. She shouldn’t gush about this sort of stuff to Daryl; he wasn’t Amy or Lily, or even Maggie.

“You’d marry a hitman.” It didn’t sound like a question. He sounded a little perplexed. It was kind of funny to see. She nodded anyway when he glanced at her, before going back to looking at the road.

“Yeah, he’s a good guy, a loving husband, and has a lot of empathy and love for that dog. You know, and with the skill he has, he’s the kind of guy who would protect you, go feral if anything happened to you, but at the same time, he can be soft and loving and… and I mean, have you seen him? It’s Keanu Reeves,” she explained, even though the more she was talking about it, the more embarrassed she became. But it wasn’t a crime to have a crush on a fictional character, right? It wasn’t like Keanu was the one she was picturing, lying in her bed at night…

“Ain’t he a bit too old for ya?”

Beth shrugged.

“Maybe I have a type.” The moment those words left her mouth, she wished the earth would open and swallow her whole. She promised she wouldn’t throw herself at him. What was she doing suggesting that? Beth whined, sliding further down the car seat. She could see him glancing at her again, but ignored it and instead covered her face with her arms. “Sorry, forget I said that, please.”

Daryl didn’t answer, and they spent the remaining few minutes of their ride in a rather uncomfortable silence. She was trying to come up with something to say to take it back, but each time she opened her mouth, the words just wouldn’t come out. It would be a lie, too, to say something like, “Look, I didn’t mean it like that,” because she did mean it like that. She could kind of see a resemblance between him and John Wick. The kind of guy who would seem scary at first, but had a soft side that you came to love…

She swallowed audibly when the word love entered her mind. It was there a lot lately. She was thinking about how she loved meeting him in the woods. Loved their training sessions. Loved his voice and the way it made her vibrate every time he spoke directly into her ear or close enough for her to feel his breath on her skin. She loved the way he curled his lips into a small, barely-there smile every time she teased him. Loved the way he looked at her, his blue eyes leaving her completely defenseless. Hopeless.

She loved their little banter. Loved talking with him about anything, really. Loved the way it felt to be touched by him. She loved the way he moved, the way he spoke with his whole body, arms flying when he got too emotional about something. She loved how he could be shy at times, avoiding her eyes, bashful. She loved that he always made sure she got home safe. The amount of texts he’d sent her since that second girl was murdered, just to ask if she was home safe, would be annoying if it were anyone else. She loved that he cared. Loved that under all the rough, dangerous biker vibes he had going on, there was a sensitive, thoughtful guy who could make her laugh like no one else.

But surely, she wasn’t in love with Daryl Dixon, was she?

Beth eyed him from her seat once they came to a stop. He was biting into the side of his thumb again, lost in thought, but once he realized she was looking at him, he stopped and turned a little to her.

“Anything happens, you call me, ya hear?” Daryl asked, his voice hushed, and she nodded. “If Shawn can't make it, I can come give ya a ride.”

He said that every time. Unfortunately, nothing like that ever happened to her. It was as if, now that she had Daryl for herself regularly, the universe didn’t feel the need to throw them at each other in any other way.

“Thanks, Daryl,” she said, and before she could talk herself out of it, she leaned in and gave him a peck on his cheek. “See you on Saturday?”

“Yeah, yeah, see ya,” he said, not looking at her, all shy again. And once she left the car, he drove off quickly, his tires squealing from the abuse.

Beth looked after him, wondering what she’d gotten herself into.

You lost your darn mind, Beth Greene. You can’t seriously be falling in love with Daryl Dixon!

“I know,” she whispered to herself and flinched at the sound of her own voice.

But I think I am…

Chapter 20: Then I guess you better run

Summary:

Beth got what she wanted: she secretly meets up with Daryl in the woods a few times a week. But that's not nearly enough. She wants more. The only question is: will Daryl give in?

Notes:

You're all the best, thank you for all the love under the last chapter <3
I've been away for the weekend, so I couldn't respond to you all, but I want you to know I'm loving your reactions and I hope this chapter will be as exciting for you to read as it was for me to write ^^

P.S. I'm sorry I only added one chapter last week, instead of two, too much going on in my life this month. But I'll try to publish two more chapters after this one this week ^^

“What do you think, Beth?” Beth raised her head from where she was staring at her Frappuccino absentmindedly. “You know, about the Fair. It’s going to be there until the end of the summer, and since Amy can’t do it this weekend, we thought, maybe the next one? You know, with Thomas, Eddie, and Steve? Maybe Peter too.”

“Oh, sure, yeah, we can go,” Beth looked at the leaflet in front of her.

“It’s in Atlanta, so it’s a bit of a drive, but Eddie’s sister has an apartment there, and she’s out of town, so we could stay the night. Make a whole weekend trip out of it. Go twice if we feel like it or do some other fun stuff, I’m sure we could find something, and…” Lilly was saying, but Beth barely listened to her, her mind back with Daryl again. After their conversation about the drive-in cinema, she found herself curious about his life before, his childhood and young adulthood. She wanted to know everything about him, so she kept asking the most bizarre questions. About his favorite food now (dunno, anythin’ Carol makes, I guess, he said, shrugging, and Beth felt a ping of jealousy, then Daryl huffed a laugh and added, but wait, no, honestly? Don’t go tellin’ Carol on me, but I actually think it’s Aaron’s spaghetti), and when he was a kid (chocolate, mostly), about the music he liked (good ol’ rock and metal’s the only thing worth listenin’ to, anythin’ heavy really), concerts he’s been to (saw some small artists at some local events, never been to anythin’ huge tho), and things he did for fun (huntin’, ridin’ my bike, makin’ shit from wood, that about it, I guess. Was she a bit disappointed he didn’t say he liked meeting with her for fun? She was, but it wasn’t like she was going to mention that).

On one of their walks from the car to their clearing, she told him that she loved going to the fairs and that whenever one was close enough, she would make sure to be there. To which Daryl said he had never been to one. Never, as in not even as a kid.

Beth couldn’t wrap her head around it, but she was slowly getting used to that feeling, and she made sure not to show it to Daryl. She soon started talking about something else, but now, with this Fair being not so far from here, an idea formed in her mind.

“Can I keep it? The leaflet?” she asked Lilly and was met with a surprised look.

“Yeah, sure,” she said after an exchange of looks with Amy. They didn’t ask anything else, and soon enough, the subject moved to other things. Amy was saying that she had some troubles with Thomas; they were both doing some apprenticeships, and between their schedules, they had a hard time meeting each other. But apparently, even when they both had time, Tommy preferred inviting other people over too instead of spending time with her alone.

It was bullshit; Beth knew it was Amy who kept telling Tommy she couldn’t meet him, but she was hardly going to say anything to Lilly. Since that party on the beach, anytime Beth found Amy’s eyes on Lily, she couldn’t help but wonder if that’s how she looked watching Daryl. Lovestruck and sad because it could never be. After everyone went to sleep that first night of the summer, and as Beth lay wide awake in Amy’s bed, recalling her kiss with Daryl, Amy whispered to her an admission of her own.

If Beth didn’t have her secrets, she’d never believe that Amy managed to hide her crush on Lily that well. But now she was well aware that it was quite easy to overlook something when one was too busy with their own stuff. It was, however, quite surprising to hear that Amy didn’t feel as strongly as before about Tommy, that more often than not she was thinking about Lily while being with him. Beth hugged her and whispered soothing words as Amy cried about it, full of shame and anger at herself. She also promised not to say anything to Lily. It was becoming hard watching Amy pretend and fail at it miserably though, what with how oblivious Lily was to it. And yet again, Beth couldn’t help but wonder if that’s what anyone else would think about her and Daryl if they ever saw them together.

That afternoon, after she said her goodbyes to the girls, she hopped in her truck and drove off in the direction of the woods, that leaflet sitting on the passenger seat. Would he go with her? Was that an okay thing to ask?

Beth got to their meeting spot way ahead, but she wasn’t too worried about that. She had a book with her, but couldn’t focus on the words on the paper anyway. They really bonded over the last month. Who wouldn’t when meeting four times a week and spending over an hour in close proximity to each other? Alone and in the woods where nobody could interrupt them, where they could be themselves, away from the world. It was truly the best idea she’d ever had. But that wasn’t enough for her, was it? Beth wanted more, and yes, she promised herself she wouldn’t throw herself at him anymore, wouldn’t try kissing him again, but perhaps a lovely date at the Fair would be alright? If she didn’t call it a date, maybe?

A loud knock on the window made her jump in her seat. She looked up, expecting to see Daryl, and saw another familiar face. Her heartbeat quickened. Oh no, what was he doing here? Daryl could come any moment now, and what if Father Matthias sees them together here?

The man in his thirties smiled at her through the window. She’d never liked him; his masses were always focused on Satan and purifying one’s soul from all sinful thoughts and behaviors. This was definitely not the kind of person she wanted to see when she was planning on asking a twelve-year-older guy on a date. A guy she had a lot of sinful thoughts about.

Beth rolled her window down, and as she did so, he stepped back a little for a moment before leaning right back into the space she created. Beth had to hold back a flinch. He was a little too close for her liking. Was he able to see all her guilt from up this close?

“Good afternoon, Father,” she said politely, and the man nodded.

“Afternoon, Bethy!” She hated that he called her that. It sounded wrong in his mouth. “Is everything alright? I saw your car while driving by and thought, isn’t that Hershel’s truck? I must say, I thought I saw your ponytail from the road, and as you know, dear Bethy, it’s not too safe lately to be hanging all alone on the sides of the roads. So I thought I’d check in on you, make sure everything’s alright. Did the car break? Your father told me he had some troubles with it after the last mass.”

“Oh, no I…” Goddammit, think, Beth! Think! And quickly! On a whim, she jumped out of the truck, almost bumping into Father Matthias. “I’m sorry, yes, it broke down, but it’s fine, I already called for help, so there’s no need to worry about it, Father.”

“Good to hear, then I shall wait with you. Make sure you have a ride back home?”

Good Lord, why does he have to be so annoyingly helpful?

He didn’t step back, and for a short moment, she was right in his space. Beth bounced back, his eyes following her movements. Was he always staring like that? Beth never paid him that much attention, to be honest. They transferred him here a few years back; he was twenty-seven then, and from the first moment she laid her eyes on him, she didn’t like him. Beth, of course, felt bad about it—that wasn’t a Christian kind of behavior, not liking someone from the get-go, without any reason, so she tried to be more neutral than hateful, but something about him irked her.

His masses were too preachy, too judgmental, and full of hatred towards people who didn’t follow the Lord. Her mother disagreed with her when she tried bringing it up, saying that Beth was projecting something, that it wasn’t hatred, but genuine fear for their souls and the souls of those they, the bad people, corrupt. But Beth couldn’t shake the feeling.

She would much rather spend her time listening to Father Gabriel. His masses were always so full of heart and love for the Lord’s creations. Every priest should be like Father Gabriel, she told her mom, and Annette laughed. Oh, that’s what it is, you’re just mad he took half of your precious Father Gabriel’s masses, aren’t you? Oh, Bethy…

It wasn’t it, or at least not entirely. But now Beth had a bigger problem at hand. She should probably alert Daryl of Father Matthias’ presence so that he could just drive by them, pretend that he wasn’t coming here at all. But the notion of being left here with Father Matthias? Of not seeing Daryl today? Going back with nothing? It didn’t sit right with her. She had to get rid of him instead. Preferably before Daryl comes, or she would have to make Daryl part of the ruse.

Darn it, she should’ve parked further in the forest, hiding the car a little. What was she thinking? And how could she not hear him drive by? She found his car, parked a little further away, a sporty blue thing he got from his dear old brother on his birthday, a present he couldn’t not accept, as he told Hershel once during dinner at their house.

The rumble of the bike, distant, but getting closer, made her pay attention to Father Matthias again. He was still watching her, curiously.

“No need for a ride home, I’m sure whoever comes from the Dixon’s garage will give me a ride. It’s part of the service, isn’t it?”

Father Matthias scrunched his nose in response.

“And that’s supposed to make me feel better about your safety, Bethy? Dixons? Tsk, tsk, Bethy, you know better than that, surely. Getting in the car with one of them? Who knows what awful, dirty thoughts plague their mind? You do know that Daryl Dixon is still considered the only suspect in poor Sophia’s—God let her soul rest peacefully—case?” He made the sign of the cross when speaking about Sophia, finally averting his eyes from her. As always when he spoke about the murders, there was this glint in his eyes, sadness and rage. “I can’t imagine leaving you with someone capable of…”

“And what happened with innocent until proven guilty, Father? I don’t think Daryl was convicted of anything,” she spoke, anger rising inside of her. She hated when people spoke about Daryl as if it was a done deal, a matter of time before he goes to jail for it, as if he was the one who did it.

“Of course, Bethy, he wasn’t, but we all know what kind of person he is, don’t we? Oh, or maybe you don’t, I can’t imagine you having much trouble with the Dixons at the farm; you’re simply too far away from the city center. But if you saw what I saw, you wouldn’t be happy leaving a young, pretty thing like yourself with someone like that. Didn’t your mother warn you of all the atrocious things that can happen to a beautiful little girl if she exposes herself to this kind of man? They aren’t like you or I, Bethy, men like Daryl Dixon are animals. Disgusting, perverted, wild animals.” Beth didn’t quite succeed in holding a grimace back. He noticed, she was sure, his eyes traced her face, and he smiled, seeing her reaction as if that was something he was going for. As if he knew she disliked him, and liked Daryl. But he couldn’t have known that. She still played her part at church and all the meetings with other churchgoers and Fathers. She was still the same polite, good girl who never did anything wrong in the eyes of society. Beth didn’t even tell Lily and Amy about her practice days with Daryl. She kept it all a secret. No, Father Matthias couldn’t have known, but then, what was he looking at her like that for? Why was he searching her face so closely, finding her evident disgust, and smiling? “And I promised myself I would protect my… my community from evildoers, so tell you what, why don’t we leave a message for whoever comes from the Dixon’s garage, and I’ll give you a ride back to your farm, hm? I’m sure they can manage without you, and this way, you won’t be exposed to…”

The bike turned into the road they were at, and Beth felt the air leave her lungs. Daryl.

He came from a different side than she expected him to, so he saw them both, standing in front of her car, but he didn’t drive away like she thought he would.

Daryl stopped his bike close to the woods and hopped off it in one swift motion. Beth glanced back at Father Matthias and blushed when she found his eyes on her. Did he notice the way she ogled Daryl? It was something she did almost without thinking now, taking Daryl in, sliding her eyes down and up his body in amazement, still not quite believing that she knew the shape of it so well now, having him pressed to her so often.

“Mr. Dixon!” Beth closed the space between them, getting away from Father Matthias’ side in the process. Did she call him Mr. Dixon before when she spoke to the priest too? She didn’t remember; she hoped she did. “I’m so glad you came! I have no idea why this old thing broke again. I only managed to get to the side of the road before the engine died completely.”

Daryl nodded, as if that was something he was expecting to hear. Then his eyes went to Father Matthias, who was greeting him with the coldest stare she’d ever seen on him. That hatred she always thought simmered under his skin during his preaching was now displayed on his face. Bare and evident.

“Alright, Bethy. Give the man the keys and let’s go. I’m sure he can tow the car back on his own.” He told her, but his eyes didn’t leave Daryl. “You may need a bigger vehicle for that; can’t imagine why anyone would choose to drive a bike to an emergency caller. Can you, Bethy?”

Now he looked at her, and she froze under his scrutinizing gaze. Was he accusing her of lying? Or was he implying something about Daryl?

“I…”

“She stays.” Daryl’s voice was hoarse, but firm. “And we won’t be needin’ your services, Father.”

“All due respect…”

“No need to pretend you have any respect for me,” Daryl interrupted him, his voice taking on a mean edge. “Been hearin’ what you were sayin’ to people. Tell me, Father, isn’t gossipin’ a sin?”

“I do not gossip!” Father Matthias said, offended. “I only do what our Lord and Savior needs me to do, which is making sure that our community is safe from sin!”

“Ahh, yeah, and I’m the sinner you have to protect everyone from, right?” Daryl smirked, but not in that way he sometimes would when he was being playful with her. No, this time it was an unpleasant little grimace. “Did it ever occur to you that there’s no evidence of anythin’ you’re sayin’ about me?”

Daryl moved to her car, indicating for her to follow with his chin only. No touching.

“I don’t need evidence, I’m a believer and I keep my eyes and ears open, Mr. Dixon.”

Father Matthias didn’t let up, trailing after them, and Daryl turned around slightly to tease him from around his shoulder:

“So gossipin’, yeah?”

Beth had never seen Father Matthias fuming like that. Daryl was getting under his skin the way she always wanted to, calling him out on his bullshit that somehow flies above everyone else’s head.

“Get in the car, Bethy. We’re leaving.”

He stepped in her direction, his hand reaching for her, but Daryl moved to block his way, positioning himself in front of her.

“No, you are, she ain’t, I need her here to tell me what’s exactly going on with her car,” he explained, his voice still unrelenting and firm before anything else. Beth couldn’t take her eyes away from his face, so different from the way he’s been with her for the past month. So much more serious and mean now. She felt a flush of shame rise to her cheeks as she realized that she liked this side of Daryl too, that the way he stood up to other people, so unperturbed by the social norms and expectations, was actually getting a rise out of her, her pulse quickening and butterflies returning to her tummy. “What I do not need is you breathing on my neck, so I’m askin’ nicely, take a hike, Father, so I can do my job.”

Father Matthias snorted, an ugly look marrying his face.

“If you lie one hand on that girl, Dixon…”

“Worry about where your own hands go, Father, and I’ll worry about mine.” Daryl spat, Father Matthias’ words finally getting to him, it seemed. The grimace on his face was unmistakable, but he didn’t back off, didn’t let Father Matthias through.

“Bethy,” he started again, ignoring Daryl, but Beth didn’t let him speak again.

“It’s alright, really. No need to worry, Father.”

Beth couldn’t quite believe it when Father Matthias just shook his head, told her to be careful, and went back to his car. He drove off, and Beth felt like she could finally breathe. This whole conversation was so intense, she didn’t even know how to make them stop. She thought about how she’s never seen Father Matthias so perplexed with someone, but truth be told, she’s never seen Daryl be so cruel to anyone either. The hatred was surely mutual here, but it was definitely more intense on Father Matthias’s side.

“You alright?”

Beth nodded.

“Yeah, you don’t think he suspects something?”

Daryl shook his head, continuing on his way to her truck.

“Doubt he’d leave ya here if he did.”

Beth watched Daryl for a moment before speaking again, worry evident in her voice.

“Are you okay?”

“Yeah, ‘m fine.” Daryl rasped back, but he shook his head a little again as if trying to get rid of some unpleasant thoughts.

They stayed on the side of the road for another minute or two. Daryl made her park her car a little further down from the road, and he followed her on his bike, then made sure that both vehicles were hidden from the road before they ventured into the woods, both of them lost in their thoughts. It wasn’t until halfway to their clearing that Beth finally found herself speaking up again:

“Thank you.” Daryl turned his head to the side to look at her. “For, you know, not driving past us. I thought you might get antsy about people seeing us together and just not stop at all.”

Daryl snorted.

“And what? Leave you with this nutjob? Nah, ain’t nobody deserves that.” She smiled, feeling weirdly reassured by his words. Beth knew he didn’t say anything of the sort, but she couldn’t help but hear it in his tone all the same: he would never leave her with anyone he wouldn’t completely trust, no matter how hard it would be on him. Was she delusional? Probably. “And it’s not like I’m gonna bail on my best student.”

Beth laughed when he snaked an arm around her shoulders and pressed her into his side to then mess her hair playfully. If it was anyone else, she would push them away, not wanting her hair to look like a nest, but it was always such a pleasant surprise when he was the one initiating the affectionate gestures between them. He wasn’t offering much of it, usually only friendly pats on the back or playful shoves, but Beth took what she could with a huge smile on her face.

“You mean your only student?”

Daryl shrugged.

“Can be both, can’t it?” he mused, still side-hugging her. Beth let herself hug him back, a familiar warmth spreading through her body. It surprised her how quickly the anger left him. As if the moment Father Matthias drove off, that cold, mean version of Daryl Dixon evaporated, and now he was back to being her favorite flavor of Daryl: playful and lighthearted. If this happened a month ago, Beth was sure he would still be reeling from that conversation, all tense and angry, and shutting her off.

“Can be whatever you want it to be,” she smiled up at him and watched as a red blush crept onto his face. His eyes were dark and warm on her face, and Beth blushed under this gaze of his as well, already cursing herself for being too forward. She was sure he was going to move away from her now. Put distance between them again. But instead, Daryl leaned in, his arm hanging loosely around her shoulders, hand resting near her collarbones again, but this time, unlike when he was pretending to attack her, his touch was light and gentle. When he spoke again, she felt his hot breath in her hair, and she could swear she could feel his hoarse voice vibrate under her skin.

“Bold offer to make, Greene. Didn’t ya hear I’m the sinner of the month?”

Beth giggled, a pleasant shiver running through her body. He was becoming more and more playful with her lately, a reminiscence of their first night at his place, way before all the kissing, way before all the messy feelings made him distance himself from her. Only difference was: now it seemed intentional in a way it never felt before. That, or Beth was being delusional again.

“Don’t be so modest, Daryl. I’m pretty sure you’re the sinner of all months,” she answered, joy evident in her voice as she briefly pressed herself more into him, basking in all the feelings it brought.

“That’s what you think?” he teased, no real annoyance behind his words.

She got herself out of his grip right before they were to reach the clearing, skipped a few steps, and turned around to him with a huge grin on her face.

“That’s what I know,” she told him, laughing.

Daryl stopped, watching her carefully for a moment. He was doing that thing again when he bit the inside of his mouth, thinking. He hung his head to the side too, like a puppy. Adorable, she thought, quickly forgetting about all the fear and disgust she felt around Father Matthias.

When they were in the woods, she rarely thought about anything but Daryl. Daryl’s eyes on her, searching, looking right into her soul and taking her apart day by day. Daryl’s hands on her, so sweet, so rough, so gentle at the same time, but still so far from what she really wanted from his touch. Daryl’s hot breath mingling with her own when they tripped one another and ended up on the ground. So close, so tempting… a forbidden fruit that she desperately wanted to taste. It was as if they were constantly pushing themselves to the edge, right into that line that he told her they wouldn’t cross ever again. A line she wasn’t supposed to be near, but here she was, lying to her family, lying to her friends, and dreaming about jumping from that cliff with him.

Oh, please, daddy, forgive me, for I love that man…

“Then I guess you better run,”

Beth blinked. He didn’t say what she thought he did, right? He couldn’t mean…

She knew she shouldn’t have been spacing out around him. She promised after all, but what did her promises even mean anymore? When she was breaking every single rule she’s ever had? Lying and lying and lying and not even feeling bad about it anymore.

“What?” she asked stupidly, and when he smirked at her in response, she knew she was in trouble. Even before the words left his mouth.
“I said, run, girl, and better pray I don’t catch ya,”

A shiver went through her body, but she had no time to focus on it or on the other things his words did to her because he moved suddenly, making her squeak in panic. Beth, like a good girl, did what she was told. She ran onto their clearing and passed it, a complaint at the tip of her tongue. Was he really expecting her to outrun him?

She chanced a glance behind and saw him standing where she left him, watching her. Beth wasn’t going to look a gifted horse in the mouth though. She didn’t stop, and soon enough, she heard him behind her anyway. Beth squeaked again as his fingers grazed her hair and she made a quick turn to her right, using a tree for leverage, but when she came on the other side of it, he was already there.

“Gotcha,” he grabbed at her, his hands closing on her shoulders, but Beth was ready. She used his strength against him like he’d taught her, throwing his hands off her with ease and tripping him up. And then she was running again, her heart pounding loudly in her chest, the adrenaline pumping through her veins. She couldn’t hear anything but her own breath and loud steps, the twigs snapping under her boots. She was at the edge of the clearing when he made another attempt, and this time he came unexpectedly, tripping her with ease and going down after her.

She landed on her belly and turned around quickly, trying and failing to shake him off herself. Out of breath and after using all her energy on running away, she stood no chance against him. He had her pressed into the ground, her hands in his solid grip in no time. She wiggled her hands a little, and it made him squeeze her wrists even harder. The squeak that left her mouth wasn’t exactly a sign of distress.

“Gotta work on your stamina, girl,” he told her, his breath ghosting on her lips. Beth hated how calm he was, how unperturbed, yet again, with their closeness. He was pressing down on her, her legs trapped between his, his chest so close that it was moving in time with her rapid breaths, even though he wasn’t nearly as out of breath as she was. Every point of contact between them was setting her skin on fire, and here he was, telling her that she had to work on her form. Beth just couldn’t take it anymore.

“I thought…,” she started, trying to get the words out even with her rapid breathing. She stopped to wet her lips and almost whimpered at the sight of him following the movement with his dark baby blues. He quickly raised his eyes back to hers, catching himself a little too late, and Beth watched his throat bubble as he swallowed audibly. What does a girl have to do here to get one small kiss from the guy she’s in love with? she thought to herself, holding her breath for a second, before whining a little pathetically: “I thought you said I should pray not to be caught. If I knew you were going to punish me by laughing at my poor form, I wouldn’t run at all.”

Daryl’s lip quivered in a barely sustained laugh, and her heart took a leap in her chest. He moved then, but not in the direction Beth desperately wanted him to. He slid off her entirely, leaving her wanting, and laid down on the grass next to her instead.

“That mouth of yours is gonna get you in trouble one day, you know that, Greene?”

Can it get me in trouble now?

Beth bit into her lip and then made a decision.

In one swift motion, she hoisted herself up and on him, straddling him, and when he raised his arms to push her off, she caught them and pinned them down, mirroring the way he was holding her down a second ago. Beth was pretty sure she was only able to do that because he was too surprised to fight her, his eyes growing bigger as he watched her, unblinking.

“And you know what I think?” she asked, lowering herself and bringing their faces close again. “I think you’re a coward who can’t deliver on his own threats.”
Was it only the light, or did his eyes darken? Beth held her breath, her lower lip between her teeth again, but he didn’t seem interested in looking down, focusing entirely on her eyes.

“I ain’t a coward,” he murmured, raising his head a little. A challenge. His rough voice almost turned into a whisper. She leaned in, their noses bumping into each other. He watched her as if hypnotized, and maybe they both were since she didn’t feel like she was in control of her own body anymore, some instincts taking over from within her. Their breaths mingled, and she could swear she could almost taste him on her tongue already, even though there was still some space between them.

“Then prove it,” Beth whispered back, and yelped with surprise when she found herself on her back again. A familiar heat found its way into her tummy and down, below, where she imagined him touching her every single night. Beth whimpered when he touched her now, but her excitement was short-lived, as just a moment after he brought his hands to her sides, he started to move his fingers in an entirely wrong way. The girl recoiled from the tickling, a loud laugh ripping itself out of her throat as she tried to free herself from his grip. To no avail. He moved with her everywhere she did, trapping her over and over again, finding new spots to tickle her, and taking her breath away yet again.

“Please, please, stop, Daryl, please,” she kept shouting, tears welling up in her eyes. She was kicking her legs up, or at least trying to, but he trapped her under his own again, and no amount of shuffling and wiggling helped.

“Take it back!” he shouted back, laughing with her.

“What?” She couldn’t focus under this torture, especially when his hands hit the right spot, making her squirm under his fingers. “Alright, alright! I’m sorry! I—I’m t-takin’ tha’ back! Daryl, I… I take that back!”

It was hard to speak, but he didn’t seem to pity her. In fact, the bastard wasn’t making it easy on her at all.

“What? Can’t hear ya!” He shouted mockingly, and for another moment, Beth could only thrash underneath him.

“You… You’reee noooot a-a c-coward!” And there it was. The torture stopped.

She laughed for a moment longer, still feeling the ghosts of his fingers on her tummy and exposed sides. She wore a tank top that day, wanting him to see as much skin as possible. Stupid girl, thinking she could change his mind with some darn tank top and shorts that barely covered her ass. It only made the tickling worse.

“I hate you,” she said to him when she came back to herself. He slid down her side at some point, one of his arms still lying loosely on her naked belly, and his legs tangled with hers, but less forcefully than a minute ago. He kept close though, something he rarely did, and when she finally pulled her hands away from her face after rubbing her cheeks and eyes of the remaining tears and turned her head to look at him, she found him watching her again. He had his own head pillowed on one of his arms, and he seemed, for a lack of a better word: cozy, comfortable in a way she never thought he would be with her.

“Hi,” she breathed out a long, happy breath, and Daryl raised the corner of his mouth into that half-smile she loved so much. She could barely focus on it now though, as Beth was painfully aware of his thumb making circles on her skin right next to her belly button. He was touching her lightly, almost absentmindedly, and Beth felt anticipation build inside her, goosebumps breaking out on her skin as she kept looking into those unreadable, thoughtful eyes of his.

“Hi,” Daryl whispered back, his voice breaking a little on the word, even though she was the one under torture a hot minute ago, not him. The way Daryl looked at her then took her breath away again, and for a second, just a split second, she thought he was going to kiss her. No, more than that, she was sure he would. The feeling was gone as soon as she thought this though. Daryl’s eyes snapped away from hers and to his hand still on her skin, and then, in a flash, his hand was gone, and he moved to stand up, his voice impossibly guttural as he rushed her to do the same: “Come on, don’t have all day to lay around, gotta teach ya somethin’.”

The clearing was quiet except for the faint rustle of leaves and the soft click of Daryl's crossbow as he handed it to her. Beth took it cautiously, the weapon heavier than she'd expected. "Feet apart," Daryl instructed, his gravelly voice low and calm. He stepped closer, his boots crunching against the dry earth.
She shifted her stance awkwardly, and in no time, Daryl was behind her, his chest brushing against her shoulder as he leaned in. His arm reached around her to adjust the angle of the crossbow. "Not like that," he murmured, his drawl sending a flicker of heat through her, "Here, lemme show ya."

His hand was warm and rough as it settled on her arm, guiding her into place. Then his fingers brushed the curve of her shoulder, setting it right, lingering for just a heartbeat too long. Beth swallowed hard, her pulse quickening as he leaned closer. She could feel his breath on her temple, his scent—a mix of leather, sweat, and woodsmoke—wrapping around her senses.

"Keep your grip steady," he said, moving his hand to hers, his touch firm as he aligned her fingers with the stock. Her hands felt small under his, trembling just enough to make her glad he was there to steady her.

"Alright, go on," he coaxed, his voice softer now, almost gentle. She exhaled slowly and squeezed the trigger. The bolt shot forward, striking the target with a satisfying thud, just shy of the center.
Beth spun toward him, her grin bright, though it faltered when she caught the ghost of a smile tugging at Daryl’s lips. He nodded once, approving but unreadable, though the way he stayed close kept her heart thundering.

Maddening. That’s what it was — the way he lingered, his touch sending her mind spiraling, the way his eyes kept boring into her as he stood behind her, his voice so close to her skin as he spoke. And as the sun dipped behind the trees, she found herself biting her lower lip, feeling a spark of anticipation burning in her chest. Something had to give, Beth thought, or else she’d lose her mind.

“From now on, we’re runnin’ every practice,” Daryl said gruffly apropos of nothing as he walked her back to her car that evening. “You have to be able to defend yerself, no matter how outta breath you are.”

Beth complained about it, of course she did, but then their next run also ended with her beneath him, and she concluded that she was fine with it. No matter how horny it was making her feel, no matter how unbearable it was to have him press into her in all the right places without him meaning to.

“Nobody’ll wait for ya to catch your breath, girl. You gotta fight…” It was easy to say, fight, when all she could think about was the sweet weight of him on top of her. Was Daryl really oblivious enough to not know what he was doing to her? Holding her down by her wrist, the whole weight of his body on her, it was a miracle she could even form a reasonable thought right now.

“Look, there is no way, Daryl. I can’t even move, alright?” She wiggled underneath him, frustration getting the best of her.

“So what, you’re just gonna lie back and let some fuckin’ jackass do what he likes, huh? That what you want?” He leaned in, trying to appear intimidating. Beth swallowed audibly, her glassy eyes following the movement. She wished she could tell someone, ask if something was wrong with her or if it was completely normal to get turned on by a sweaty redneck pinning you to the ground and threatening you. “Come on, I told ya what to do. Throw me off balance.”

Beth tried, but it didn’t work the way he told her, and after a few minutes, she started getting agitated again.
“I just can’t, Daryl, I can’t!”

“Alright, alright. Come here, I’ll show ya.” To her utter displeasure, Daryl slid off her and lay down on his back. She watched him for a moment, not really getting what they were doing now.

“What?” she asked when he kept looking at her expectantly.

“Hop on.” He made a vague gesture with his head, indicating for her to sit on him. Beth blushed, but as always, followed his directions. She felt clumsy and awkward getting on top of him, not knowing where to sit exactly, not wanting to do it wrong. Daryl didn’t comment on the way she wiggled herself for a moment, still agitated, but for another reason entirely, and Beth pretended not to notice the way his jaw set as he swallowed audibly during her antics.

Beth watched as Daryl moved his hands up on the ground and above his head, still looking up at her expectantly. She almost whimpered at the sight, finding it just as arousing to have him underneath her, all submissive like that.

Beth leaned down slowly, grabbed him by his wrists, and smirked down at him.

“What are you waitin’ for, Daryl Dixon? Fight. Or are you just gonna let me do whatever I like to ya?”

He smirked back at her, a sight she was rarely met with, and a second later, she wasn’t holding him anymore. Her hands were in the grass above him, ass in the air. She felt him grab her in the middle, and she moved back, trying to shake him off, but the next thing she knew, he grabbed the hand that was trying to push him back. Another second and she was lying on her back again, him squeezing her in the middle.

“You were sayin’ somethin’?” he asked, letting go of her but staying positioned between her legs, sitting back on his haunches.

“That was so hot,” the words escaped her unbidden, and they both blushed. Daryl dropped his gaze down to his knees, the fringe covering his eyes a little. From hot to adorable in seconds, that man was going to be the death of her. “But there’s no way I can throw you like that.”

“There is. I’ll show ya. Slower this time.”

Beth mouthed him again, and this time Daryl took his time, showing her exactly what to do with her hands once she found herself on her back like that—how to use the attacker’s weight against them and push them up and away. Daryl talked through it all, showing her different ways she could position herself, different ways it could go based on her speed and strength, and she listened carefully, the need to do good overpowering her desire for him at the moment.

It took an hour, but when she finally managed to throw him off her—not as gracefully or swiftly as he did—she squeaked from happiness.

“I did it! I did it!” she let go of his middle and hoisted herself up to hug him properly. “Oh my God, I can’t believe it!”

She laughed happily, pressing her cheek into his chest. Daryl laughed with her, letting her lie down on him for a moment longer before twisting to the side. He gently laid her down next to him, one of his arms still draped loosely over her middle, another supporting her head.

Beth pulled her face away from his chest and looked up at him.

“I’m getting good at this,” she informed him with a smile. “Pretty soon I won’t need you at all.”

She didn’t mean anything bad by it. It was supposed to be just a light tease, but the moment the words left her mouth, a realization struck her: pretty soon she was going to start college. In Atlanta. And even though it was close enough for them to still meet on the weekends, they never said how long their arrangement would last. What if he didn’t want to continue this after the summer ended? What if, once she learned it all well enough, he’d decide to finish their lessons once and for all?

Daryl grunted, bringing her attention back to himself.

“What’s that face for?” His voice took on a soft note, his eyes looking right into her soul. Beth reached out, her fingers finding his cheek. She caressed his face gently in her hand, missing him already even as he lay next to her. Beth knew she shouldn’t tell him, but the sentiment slipped past her lips even without her meaning to.

“I just don’t want this to ever end, you know?” Her voice sounded different, even to her own ears, playfulness gone and replaced by love. Is that the closest she’ll ever come to telling him how much it all means to her? He deserved so much more than that, Beth thought, tracing the lines of his face, trying to commit this moment to memory so much, she barely noticed the way Daryl mapped her face with his eyes right back.

Beth didn’t expect him to move, but Daryl lifted his hand slowly, the rough pads of his fingers grazing hers on his face. Her chest tightened as his eyes stayed fixed on hers, so open and vulnerable it felt like he was baring his soul. Beth couldn’t help herself — her thumb swept softly along his cheekbone, and she leaned in just enough to blur the space between them. The air thickened with sudden tension, and for a moment the world seemed to stop with just the two of them, suspended in time, neither willing to break the fragile silence. His breath hitched, and she could feel the warmth of it against her skin, making her pulse quicken.

Then Daryl’s head tilted slightly and as if pulled by an invisible thread, her lips met his halfway. Beth’s eyes fluttered shut as hope bloomed in her chest and excitement surged through her veins. The kiss, a tentative little thing, lingered for a second or two before Daryl moved back slightly, his breath ghosting over her lips again, the air between them warming up. When they parted, their faces stayed close, their eyes fluttering open to meet again. Her hand curled into his hair as his palm slid down from her hand, to her arm and then shoulders, goosebumps breaking on her skin, following the gentle touch of his rough fingers, as he guided them up to her shoulder and then her face. Daryl traced the line of her jaw and Beth shivered under his touch, her lips tingling and the familiar need pulling in the pit of her tummy.

For a second, they stayed like that, suspended between uncertainty and inevitability. Then, together, they closed the distance. Neither of them could say who moved first—her lips found his just as his found hers. She was so caught up in the moment she wasn’t even sure if the silent whimper that followed that gentle touch of his lips on hers belonged to her or him. 

He didn’t rush or deepen the kiss, just lingered there, taking her lower lip between his in a playful, tender tease that made her shiver. She couldn’t help the quiet whine that escaped, and she wondered if he knew how often she imagined this exact feeling each time she absently bit her own lip. Here, with him, it felt like he understood that unspoken wish. Beth didn’t let him go far when he released her lip from his teeth. She latched onto his lips not nearly as carefully as he did, but Daryl didn’t push her back. He let her kiss into the warmth of his mouth, pressing back lightly, almost bashfully. And when a moment later his fingers splayed across her cheek, embracing her face, she realized he was trembling just as much as she was. Her heart was swelling again, too full of love for this man.

Beth put her hand on his, stilling his fingers and then stole another kiss. His scruff was tickling her and even though just a day ago she was thinking she never wanted to be tickled again, she didn’t mind that at all. 

When he moved away, his hand on her face stopping her from following, it was too soon, way too soon, and she panicked. 

“Not yet, please, don’t stop yet,” she pleaded with him before giving up and opening her eyes. Was he mad? Was he going to shout and leave again? 

Beth couldn’t help another silent whine that escaped her when she saw the way he was watching her, his eyes dark and desperate. She felt relief, seeing his desire for her again on full display. Perhaps he wasn’t fairing as well as she thought, if that haunted look on his face was anything to go by. If the way he clutched her face in his hand, his teeth caught on his lip, and breath coming in short puffs, was any indication on how he felt. 

“Beth,” he was breathless now and shaking his head at her and even though there was no mistaking that look, she knew he was seconds away from telling her no again. 

“Just one more time, Daryl, please, just kiss me one more time,” she was sure she was going to scream in her pillow from embarrassment that night at the memory of this, of the way she begged him, but she would do it all over again if she had a choice. She would do anything to hear the sound that escaped him at her words. Daryl surged forward and crashed into her.

His lips claimed hers again, this time with a fervent intent that left no room for second-guessing. Beth opened to him without hesitation, meeting his tongue in a heated, consuming kiss that sent sparks through every inch of her. Daryl leaned into her, and she let herself fall back eagerly, her fingers tangling into his hair, tugging him closer, while the other hand gripped his shirt as if anchoring herself in the intensity of it all. He might have been the one to push into her, but she was the one that pulled him onto her, her legs falling open for him even without him asking. 

Their kiss grew hungry, his lips pressing to hers with a passion that matched her own feverish desire and tongue unrelenting in its exploration of her mouth. Daryl answered each of her soft, breathless moans with his own low murmurs of pleasure, her body vibrating, heating up with every sound he made. Beth let her hands explore him, tracing lines over his chest, shoulders, and arms with desperation, lingering on the solid heat of his muscles, each ridge of his chest and abs taut beneath her touch. Every brush of her fingers made him shudder, his body tensing beneath her hands, but he didn’t pull away. Instead, he pressed closer, his breath warm against her skin, his own fingers tangled in her hair as his other hand caressed her arm, each shared touch a silent admission of the longing they’d both held back for far too long.

When they finally broke apart, both of them were left gasping, and Daryl leaned forward, resting his forehead against hers, his eyes squeezed shut as he tried to steady his breathing. But even with both of them breathless, it still wasn’t enough. Beth waited, letting him catch a few shaky breaths, before her need overcame her again. She surged up to meet him, capturing his lips in another kiss that held all the longing she'd kept buried. She didn’t want it to end. For him to go back to being all calm and business like, or playful, but always backing away. So she kissed him again and again, hard and deep, pouring into each kiss the months of yearning she’d held in her heart, silently willing him to understand she wanted all of him—now and for as long as he’d let her.

During all that time he was still holding himself at a respectable distance, angling his hips away from her, not pressing into her in that sweet way she really wanted him to. And Beth would never be bold enough to do anything about that, not with anyone else, but she didn’t even really think about it when she hooked her fingers under his belt and pulled him down gently.  

Beth shivered against him and they separated again, this time on a desperate moan that escaped both of them the moment they felt each other fully. He was hard against her heat, apparently just as worked up from the kissing as she was. His eyes hopelessly searched hers for a moment before falling shut, his lips brushing hers again in a silent plea for mercy. 

“We oughta stop,” he grunted out and against his own words let his lips descend lower, kissing the corner of her mouth, then her jaw, her neck, lighting her skin on fire with each caress. Beth pulled her head back, a small noise of content escaping her at the feel of his lips against her skin. Daryl pressed his face into the crock of her neck and breathed her in, a new sensation that made something uncoil inside her. Then Daryl’s lips found the soft pulse at her neck, his mouth warm as he licked and teased her skin, kissing and grazing her with gentle nips, exactly the way she’d always imagined he would. It was getting hard to breathe. Hard to think. Her head was spinning again and her body was burning up for him again, even though he barely even did anything yet. Beth could feel him sneaking his hand down, brushing her sides gently before getting a surprisingly strong hold of her hip, but neither this, nor the way he pressed his fingers into her skin there, right under the hem of her shorts, almost painfully, raising and angling her hips in a way that allowed him to press into her more snuggly, prepared her for the torturously slow manner in which he slid his body a little up hers next, thrusting his cladded erection right into her pussy. The sensation rippled through her body and a throaty moan that escaped her almost matched his own silent rumble.

“Y'alright?” he whispered straight to her ear before taking her earlobe in between his teeth. Beth could only moan a silent “yes, Daryl, please, yes,” her voice unrecognizable to her own ears, barely even aware of what words meant anymore as he kept thrusting their hips together in the slowest, sweetest torture she’s ever been subjected to.

Beth felt herself crumble under his touch and as she thrusted back into him, urging him to move faster, a familiar overwhelming need started building up between her legs. A throbbing that only his touch could sate. Beth knew, for she imagined him doing just that enough times already.

“Daryl, please,” A sob ripped itself from her throat, her hands fisting in his clothes, pulling him impossibly closer. The fabric was infuriating, a barrier to the feverish need overcoming her, and she didn’t care about the rough ground beneath her back, the dirt, or that they were in the woods in the middle of the day—still in the open where anyone could stumble upon them. All that mattered was him, the heat of his body, the way he fit against her so well, and the breathless way they surrendered to the desire they could no longer deny. 

“I've got you,” his voice sounded like a whimper, whispering into her skin before finding her lips again. She’s never been kissed like that. It was a deep, filthy, bruising kind of kiss that was going to leave beard burns on her skin, and she loved every second of it. He kept moving, his thrusts faster, matching the pace she imposed on him by thrusting back mindlessly, his hands pressed, respectively, into her hair and her hip, as if he was glued to her, unable to move even if he wanted to. The air between them was electrifying, hot, their breaths erratic as they mingled during their heated kiss, and Beth could swear she could see stars every time she let her eyes fall close.    

It’s not enough , she still thought, and just as she did, a sob escaped her, her pussy constricting on another torturously pleasant thrust and her orgasm hitting her harder than ever. Beth pushed her head into the grass, her back arching, her breasts pressing into Daryl’s chest, and eyes squeezing shut almost painfully as pleasure overtook her whole body. She barely even heard his own groan through the haze, the way his hips jerked out of rhythm and stilled suddenly for a long moment. Daryl breathed out a quivering breath, another silent groan escaping him and making her whole body respond with another wave of heat, before moving again, slower this time, adding to an already overwhelming sensation.

Beth wasn’t sure how long she shuddered under him, but she knew she moaned his name louder than she should when she was cumming. If anyone heard… She didn’t care. Daryl’s hands finally started roaming through her body the way she wanted them to, all tender, each gentle touch a promise rather than a demand. His fingers traced the curves of her waist and the swell of her hips, exploring her as if he were memorizing every inch, savoring the softness of her skin against his calloused palms. In that quiet intimacy, she felt both cherished and vulnerable, every stroke igniting a warmth that spread through her chest, deepening the connection that had always simmered just beneath the surface.

Beth opened her eyes after what felt like eternity, swallowing audibly at the sight of him. Daryl rested his forehead on hers, his nose brushing hers and eyes wide open. There was this familiar desperation etched in his features, his eyes dark and wanting, his hair a mess around his face and his lips all dark red thanks to her. Daryl looked at her just like that when she sat in his lap after kissing him that first time, he gave her the same look back at the Dixon’s garage when she visited him in Maggie’s dress too, but there was something new in his look now, something that wasn’t there before, and it made warmth spread through her whole body. 

He was worrying his lower lip between his teeth though, holding his breath. Scared, she realized, scared of what was going to happen now. You have no business being scared of me, Daryl Dixon , she wanted to tell him, but settled for raising her hand to his cheek. The touch made him squeeze his eyes shut and free his lip. He breathed out a long shuddering breath, letting her caress his face, her fingers skimming through his beard, learning the shape of him again and again. He was nuzzling into her hand, his nose brushing against hers as he lowered himself again. They found each other’s lips and kissed slowly, desperation still lingering in every touch. She could feel him again, still rock hard between her legs, so she thrusted into him again, a little groan escaping her. It felt different than before, her panties soaking wet already, jeans damp and rigid against her clit. She wanted to chase the feeling, but Daryl stopped her, holding her hips down and pressing himself snuggly into her instead. She could feel him twitching in his pants, the sensation both exciting and pleasurable.

“But you didn’t…” she started, her voice sounding rough to her ears. Daryl lifted his head, and his eyes bore into hers. She hoped whatever he saw there satisfied him.

“Believe me, girl, I did...” he uttered after a moment, his face red up to the tips of his ears and his voice even more hoarse than usual, breaking a little. It was the hottest thing she’d ever heard. “Made a goddamned mess outta myself, all for ya,” he murmured, lowering his head to kiss her jaw and rendering her speechless for another moment. She felt disappointed that she couldn’t watch him come, that she was so consumed by her own feelings that she missed this entirely.

“But you’re still…” she whispered, letting her eyes fall shut and pulling her head back to give him more access to her neck. She felt his hot breath ghosting over her ear, and he nuzzled his nose into her nape before kissing the tip of her ear lightly.

“Yeah, no, not still, Beth, again,” Daryl growled into her ear, and Beth shuddered.

“Oh,” her cheeks reddened, and she was glad he wasn’t looking.

“Yeah, oh, blows my mind too.”

His words generated at least a few questions in her head. So soon? Did that mean it wasn’t enough for him? If it wasn’t, maybe she could watch him orgasm after all? Maybe she could touch him more? Was it something he needed? For this to be as pleasurable to him as it was to her?

“Do you… do you want me to do something else?”

Daryl shook his head against her.

“No, I’ll... handle it later.”

Beth bit into her lip. She had no idea why she was feeling so strongly about it, but suddenly it was the most important thing to her: to see him pleased and just as satisfied as she felt. That orgasm must have left her more sensitive than any other, her emotions reaching dangerous heights in seconds only.

“So, you don’t… don’t want me to touch you?” She regretted the words as soon as they left her mouth because they made his lips stop their slow, sweet descent down her neck. Beth could hear the quivering in her voice, and apparently, so could Daryl. He moved up, and she averted her eyes quickly, ashamed of her own outburst.

It was a real testament to how much their relationship had changed—from him doing everything in his power to avoid looking at her to this: Daryl took her chin between his fingers and pressed, making her move her head and look at him.

“It’s not that I don’t…” He licked his lips, nervous, and swallowed audibly, looking away from her for a moment, stalling. “Look, I – I ain’t good at this kinda thing, but I don’t wanna hurt ya.”

“You won’t,” she shook her head at him, but he didn’t respond, instead just watching her intently, as if he believed he already had somehow. “I’m sorry, it’s just… do you not… Was this not good for you?” Was this not enough? Of course it wasn’t, don’t be stupid, Beth, he needs more than that, surely, he…

He lowered his head again, and she shivered when he kissed her cheek, rendering her mind silent. “Girl,” his voice made her whole body vibrate. She hummed in response, turning her cheek a little, chasing his lips that started leaving a trail of kisses on her face. Their noses bumped into each other again, and she didn’t even need to say anything. He understood. Daryl pressed their lips together again in another sweet kiss. When they parted, he murmured, his voice trembling and rough:

“I just came in my pants like some goddamned teenager. What more do ya want from me, huh?" Daryl nuzzled into her red cheek, his lips turning up sligthly into a barely there smile, even as he grunted with effort: "Want me to use my damn words? Fine. It was amazin’, alright? You feel so fuckin’ good, Beth, I can't...” He stopped, like the words were stuck in his throat. As if it was too much too soon, but then pushed through, his eyes finding hers again. “Look, if I die tomorrow an’ end up in hell for this? All worth it, ya know?”

“Stop.” She didn’t want to think about him dying or going to hell, not for this and not for anything else. She wanted him here, with her, forever. Lying in the tall grass in their little clearing. “You’re not going to hell, Daryl Dixon.”

Daryl snorted.

“Yeah? And where do the sinners of all months go, Greene?” He jokingly brought their conversation from the day before back, and she couldn’t help but giggle at that, her disappointment forgotten.

“I don’t know, maybe between good girls’ tights?” She mused, smiling up at him now, warmth spreading through her.

Daryl nuzzled his nose into hers, a playful glint in his eyes.

“Mhmm. Is that so?”

“Mhmm,” she mimicked him, her cheeks hurting from how big her smile was, but she didn’t care. Not as long as he was smiling down at her too. “And you know, maybe also to the Fair in Atlanta? With said good girls?”

Daryl watched her for a moment, his eyes shining in the last remaining rays of sunshine.

“Maybe,” he murmured finally, and when his lips found hers again, Beth smiled into the kiss. 

Chapter 21: All yours

Summary:

It's been a few days since their kiss, and Beth is nervous about what will happen between them now. Will she get everything she bargained for during that first real date with Daryl Dixon?

Notes:

Fair warning: This one is long. Like really really long, because I got too into it and didn't pace myself at all. I think this chapter is my personal favorite one. Although, who am I kidding, I loved writing most of those chapters. It was just so much fun, you know?

Disclaimer: the song used in this chapter belongs to Emily Kinney. I obviously don't own the rights to it and I'm also not the one who wrote those words. They had Beth sing Emily's song on the show, so I thought why not here, you know? I changed just one line in it, because I wanted it to work well with the story.

***

Beth was getting good at this—this being lying to her family.

She took another one of Maggie’s dresses again, but she didn’t wear it while leaving home. No, this time, she put it in her backpack, alongside the makeup stuff she bought two days ago. The day after, she told her folks she was going camping with Amy’s family, just for one night, and then Amy’s sister was going to drive her back.

She’s going back to LA anyway. No, it’s not a problem for her. No, you don’t need to worry. I’ll be fine. It’s just Amy and her fam, relax. No, no, don’t make Shawn leave his girlfriend’s place early just to get me. Jenny doesn’t mind driving me back, promise.

She went to a coffee shop—the one near Carol’s place—and ordered herself a Caramel Frappuccino, then went to the bathroom to change. She was putting on eyeshadow, all giddy, humming to herself, when a sudden flash of memories made her stop. She bit her lip, trying not to giggle. She wasn’t sure which was better: what they did in the woods, or the way they couldn’t keep their hands away from each other on the way back to the car—flirting, touching themselves, stopping every few steps to kiss again.

Daryl propped his arm on the hood of the car when she was getting in, closed the doors after her, and leaned in, watching her from behind his fringe with such intensity it took her breath away. He told her to stay safe and didn’t flinch back when she closed the space between them to kiss him one more time—a chaste little kiss that left her wanting more. The feeling just kept growing for the rest of that day, and then it lingered like that for the days that followed. It only intensified after their first phone call following their kisses. Beth blushed furiously every time she thought about it, but it kept playing in her head on a constant loop, no matter how inconvenient it was.

As every night lately, Beth couldn’t stop thinking about him as she prepared herself for bed and lay back in her sheets. The difference was that now she could still smell him on her, still feel his lips on hers, the weight of him pressing into her, kissing, touching her the way she wanted him to for so long. Beth couldn’t quite believe it happened. It wasn’t all in her head, right?

10:49 PM Beth
Are you asleep?

She didn’t know what possessed her to send that text. It was a little after midnight. She should go to bed, not bother Daryl. But when her phone lit up with his name just a few minutes later, she all but ran to pick it up.

“Yeah?” She still sounded breathless, even though it had been hours since he kissed her. God, Daryl kissed me again. He really did. Beth had to stop herself from crying out from excitement every time that thought went through her mind. Thinking about what happened later—that got her blushing furiously.

“What’s happenin’? Are you alright?” He sounded worried, but she quickly explained. Embarrassment colored her cheeks, but Daryl didn’t laugh at her when she uttered:

“I just wanted to hear from you, you know? Make sure we’re good.”

“Girl.” It sounded like a warning, but she wasn’t sure what he was warning her off. Diving in too quickly? Being too easy? She probably was, wasn’t she? But then again, Beth doubted that was something Daryl would think of her. It was something Jimmy could say, but Daryl wasn’t like him, Beth reminded herself, trying to soothe her nerves. Daryl’s voice sounded rough and pleasant in her ears when he rasped, as if reading her mind: “Relax, ain’t goin’ nowhere. I’ll see ya on Saturday. For that lil’ fair of yours, yeah?”

He didn’t sound perplexed with her either; his voice had a warm, soft edge to it with a hint of amusement, and Beth couldn’t help but smile.

“Yeah, I know.” She fell silent, and they stayed like that for a short moment, just listening to each other breathe from the other side of the city. It was late, and they should probably both go to bed, but Beth didn’t want this conversation to end. She was pretty sure she was still too amped up from what happened between them that afternoon to fall asleep. She walked back to her bed all the same, rummaging through her head for anything to say. As Beth lay back in her bed, she finally settled on: “So, are we taking your bike?”

“To Atlanta?” Daryl murmured, but before she could answer, he did it for himself. “Nah, driving around the city is one thing. But this far? Nah, gotta get you some gear first, girl. Make sure you’re safe ‘fore I take ya on one of them longer trips.”

Beth’s voice took on a higher note as her brain short-circuited.

“Some gear?”

“Yeah, you know, some good jackets and pants, your own helmet too. Can’t drive around with one of ‘em only. Falling off the bike could really mess ya up if you don’t dress properly.”

Beth knew that. It was just that the way he said it made her heart beat faster with hope. She was trying very hard for it not to get into her head. She didn’t want to feel disappointed if he ended up telling her that he changed his mind again, that they couldn’t do this. But this? This sounded like he was planning on taking her for rides. Like maybe he wasn’t going to back down from it this time.

“I saw you riding without your helmet,” she teased him after a moment of silence, and Daryl snorted.

“Yeah, well, that’s ‘cause I’m dumb,” he muttered, voice low with a hint of shame. Then, almost like an afterthought, he added, “My ugly mug’s one thing, but I ain’t about to risk messin’ up your pretty face.”

Beth felt a blush creeping up on her cheeks again. She had to hold herself back from squealing with happiness. There were more important things than him calling her pretty.

“You’re not ugly, Daryl, and you better start wearing that helmet.”

She could bet he was smirking at her from the other side of the phone as he uttered silently:

“Or what?”

“Or I’m gonna tie you to your bedhead and you’ll never see that bike again,” she fired without thinking it through.

Daryl huffed a quiet laugh. “Huh. Kinky.” His voice carried that low, amused drawl that made her cheeks burn hotter.

“I didn’t mean it like that!” she hissed, playing offended, even as she laughed with embarrassment. The image of him tied to that bed with her sitting on him the way she was that afternoon, his arms flexing as he tried the ropes, popped into her head unbidden, and just like that, she didn’t even know what she was saying anymore. “I just… I meant, you know, because I know how to tie a knot now and because your bed has those old-school metal bed frames…”

“It does, huh?” he interrupted her, and Beth whined, embarrassed. She was making it worse, wasn’t she? Admitting that she was interested in what kind of headboard his bed had, like the creep she was.

“You know it does,” she mumbled, hiding her face in her pillow and hoping he’d just drop it. He didn’t.

“Well, ain’t that somethin’.” He sounded amused, but there was that edge of teasing in his voice. “What is it, Greene? You got a thing for headboards, or is it just mine you’re after?”

Beth simply whined again, and Daryl snorted another laugh. The sound sent a shiver down her spine. God, did she love listening to him.

“Look, why don’t we talk about you instead?” she teased, trying to get the conversation under control.

“Ain’t never thought much ‘bout my headboard before, but I’m thinkin’ on it now, I’ll tell ya that,” he said, still amused, but there was a new undertone in his voice now too. It sounded more throaty, quieter, and she imagined him eyeing that headboard curiously, his fingers skimming through one of the metal rods, then taking it in his hand to pull on it, checking how it would hold. Beth squeezed her legs together, feeling her pussy throb at the mere idea of it. “Anything else ya wanna know?”

Beth gulped. Daryl was definitely not helping her with stirring her thoughts away from sexy stuff. In fact, if anything, he was making it worse, and Beth wondered if he knew what kind of effect his teasing had on her. If he realized by now how deep her infatuation with him ran and how unbearable it was getting. But perhaps most importantly, was it getting just unbearable for him?

She bit her lower lip, her heart pounding as she thought about all the things she wanted to know about him. All the ways in which she wanted to learn him. Somehow, her brain settled on one of the dirtiest thoughts she had.

“You, um, you took care of yourself? You know, after…” She didn’t know what possessed her to say it, but she was pretty sure he could see her blush from all the way across his place, what with how red her cheeks became. Beth heard him draw in a sudden, deep breath, but he didn’t answer. Beth felt her body vibrate with both excitement and nerves as she pushed further, her mouth acting on its own volition: “Could do that now? With me on the line?”

Beth didn’t know that’s what she wanted until she said it,  but when the words hung between them, she realized she was dying for it. To touch herself. To have him touch himself while they listened to each other. Beth had no idea where the bravery to propose it came. It seemed that her filter was completely down with Daryl around.

“Beth…” He didn’t sound playful anymore, his voice breaking a little on her name and sending goosebumps up her spine. 

“It’s okay, you know? I-I’m touchin’ myself thinking about you too.” The admission left her mouth in a rush. She knew she would never tell him that otherwise, but she also knew he would never let that conversation flow otherwise either. Beth was becoming painfully aware of the heat that started between her legs thanks to his words, the timbre of his voice and the idea of him thinking about her and that headboard, and now that the words were out there, she thought, why not do something about it?

Daryl pushed the breath out of his lungs almost forcefully, and when he spoke his voice hit on a sharp, high pitch note that she rarely ever heard from him.

“Right now?” 

A quick, panicked breath. And then…

“Every night,” she said truthfully and bit her lip trying to keep herself from smiling when he groaned. The sound vibrated through her and Beth couldn’t help herself anymore. Her hand stopped playing with the hem of her cover and slid under it, first landing on her breast and then descending lower slowly. 

"Shit. How long? How long you been...?"

Beth took in a sharp breath, hearing how much this new piece of information affected him. 

“You really wanna know?” Her voice dropped to almost a whisper, the reality of what she was doing starting to get to her. Was she really going to tell him about her nightly activities? About all the nights she spent moaning his name into her pillows as she imagined him doing all sorts of stuff she’s only ever heard about to her? 

"Yeah." The word slipped out, almost a breathless huff. "Go on. Tell me."

Beth nodded, even though he couldn’t see her.

“Yes, Mr Dixon,” she drawled, making him inhale sharply.

“Beth,” he murmured and her name sounded almost like a plea in his mouth. Beth couldn’t help but let out another silent whine as she slid her hand in between her legs. Even through her pajamas she could tell she was already wet and throbbing with need. She pressed her legs close around her hand and tried to focus on what he was asking of her. 

“Since we started practicing, basically,” she uttered finally, just as breathlessly as he had a moment earlier. “It was too much—having you so close, whispering in my ear, touchin’ me…”

His breath hitched, and Beth felt a shiver run through her, but she didn’t let herself stop speaking—not for too long, at least. “I felt like I was going to explode. Remember our second lesson? You kept pressing yourself into my back, putting your arm around my neck like it was nothin’, standing so close. My skin burned under your touch, I swear,” she whispered, her voice barely audible. The silence on the other end was so thick, she could hear him swallow audibly. Just a second later, the clang of his belt sounded even louder in her ears.

"Yeah?"

“Yeah, and my legs almost buckled under me when you started giving me instructions. I could feel your breath on my ear, and all I could think about was how much I wanted you to drop your head in the crook of my neck, kiss me there, touch my breasts… and go lower.” Another thrilling shiver went through her body as she imagined him sitting in his bed with his hand around himself, head dropped against the pillows, eyes shut tight, imagining her there instead—touching him. “I wanted you to put your hand in my shorts, and I imagined that later that night, you know? I imagined your fingers on me, down there... it was so hot and wet, an’…” A desperate, low sound escaped him, and Beth responded with one of her own as she finally slipped her fingers under her waistband, unable to resist the teasing any longer. Her voice didn’t sound like hers at all when she asked next, a silent moan escaping as her cold finger made contact with her wet, warm clit. “Do you want to do that, Daryl? Do you want to touch me?”

The noise that escaped him was close to sobbing and she couldn’t help but let out another moan, her fingers going in little circles as she chased her own pleasure.

“Yeah... damn, Beth, yeah.” He groaned, his breath hitched and she imagined his hand spreading on his cock to move with the same pace he was rutting into her that day. “Are ya… Beth, are ya touchin’ yerself now?”

“Yeah, I am,” she breathed out. “But I- I wish it was you, Daryl…”

Beth jumped when the bathroom door opened and a tall woman passed her on her way to one of the stalls. A blush covered her cheeks at the thought of all the things she said to him during that phone call. The things good girls should never say to bad, rough bikers his age. The things she now worried might make him run away. Was she too much? Was she too forward? Was he going to freak out again because of that?

She hadn’t seen Daryl for two days, the longest two days of her life, and now that Beth knew she was going to meet him in just over an hour, she was slowly descending into madness. They didn’t really talk about what happened between them, didn’t talk about what it meant for their relationship, and the last time they didn’t talk about it right away, he went off on her. Then the next time he kissed her, he told her it wasn’t going to lead to anything more, that they weren’t going to make it a thing. So, Beth couldn’t help but spiral now, one panicked question entering her mind after another in close, almost unbearable succession.

What if Daryl cancels? What if he doesn’t come for her and never speaks to her again? What if he only comes to tell her off for being a stupid bitch again? Yell at her for tricking him into crossing the line again? Beth knew none of them were drunk this time, and if he was to get pissed off about it, he probably would when she suggested that they have phone sex, but this knowledge did nothing to soothe her nerves. She knew things were different between them now. That something had changed, but what if it wasn’t enough?

Beth breathed out a huge gulp of air, trying to calm herself. It’s fine, she told herself, it’s going to be all fine.

And what if it is fine? What if they go to the Fair and have the best date ever? What if he takes her home after and this time shares a bed with her? She stopped again. Was he used to taking women home and having his way with them on the first date? Would she want him to do that with her? For him to take her home and make her fully his? To make love to her? The idea of it, unlike a few months ago with Jimmy, set her insides on fire. She was trembling with excitement at the mere thought of Daryl Dixon wanting her like that. No matter that it was only their first date. Beth wanted to throw caution out of the window. To finally feel his calloused hands on her the way she’d been dreaming of this whole time.

Beth shook her head. Daryl probably wouldn’t, no need to get your hopes up, girl.

She finished putting her makeup on—a little bit of mascara, eyeshadow, and lip gloss, just a little something to appear a tad older and hotter. She looked at herself up and down in the mirror, barely recognizing the girl that was standing in front of her. Technically, she still looked the same as she did over six months ago, but she could see the change in the way she held herself. Gone was that shy, unsure girl who only ever did what was expected of her, not really thinking about what she wanted. Here, in that bathroom, the woman who was looking back at her was different—less unsure, more focused. That woman knew what she wanted, and she was going to take it.

Her hair was tied in a nice little ponytail. She liked that look on herself, but as she watched herself, she decided to raise her hand to her hair and pull on the hairbands, untangling it and letting the hair flow loosely to her shoulders and down on her breasts. Beth was supposed to have it cut, but she missed her hairdresser appointment, too busy hanging with Daryl to remember about it. Now, as she brushed through it, she wondered if he’d like her like that, with her hair loose, cascading down her body.

“Let’s see, shall we?” she told herself, running her hands through the blonde waves one last time, before exiting the bathroom.

Her coffee was waiting for her at her table, and Beth let herself sit back and drink in silence for a few minutes, watching people and cars pass her by. She tried relaxing, but to no avail. Beth didn’t stop trembling with excitement until the last minute, her mind constantly either taking her to the night before, the afternoon, or to what would happen on their date and after. Her nerves almost got the best of her when she saw Carol rushing down the street. Carol waved at her through the window, a small, barely-there smile greeting her. Beth blushed under her gaze, but smiled and waved back, trying not to look too guilty.

Something in the way Carol held herself reminded her of Daryl, though, and Beth had a surprising thought: Does she know? Would Daryl tell her? Would he tell anyone? Beth didn’t think so, but then again, she didn’t think he’d ever kiss her again either, and here she was. Kissed thoroughly and with a very exciting knowledge of how Daryl Dixon sounded when he was coming undone. 

They met in an alley behind the coffee shop. Beth found him smoking a cigarette, leaning on the truck in one of his better jeans. The ones with no holes in them. Gone was the leather vest. Instead, he had a dark grey button-up shirt on with rolled-up sleeves. He still looked rough and dangerous, but she could tell he tried to double down on the big bad biker vibe. If she had her way, they would go by bike to Atlanta, but it was hard to argue with him when he was all like: Gotta get you some gear first, girl. Beth didn’t want to be delusional about it, but that did sound like he was thinking about buying some gear for his girl and taking her on many more trips, right? She didn’t imagine that?

Beth tried to make him say it again to make sure that's what he meant, but the day before when she called him to ask what time they were meeting for the trip Daryl was either busy, running some errands, or didn’t want to talk to her because he cut their conversation short. Beth hoped it wasn’t the latter. All she did in the last few days was hope and hope and hope. That and miss him like crazy. Since the moment they hung up, Beth couldn’t stop thinking about hearing Daryl’s voice again. Was she addicted already? Was that it? Lily and Amy always went on about how it felt to be in love, and she’d never believed them, but here she was, unable to go one hour without thinking about him, without wanting him or recalling the things they did and said to each other.

“Hi,” Beth smiled at him now when his gaze shifted to her. It was maybe a heartbeat, one intense quick look, and then he was averting his eyes, not even looking her up and down the way he usually did. Beth watched him swallow audibly as he turned his face to the side and away from her, as if somebody punched him. Did he not like the way she look?

Daryl stomped on the butt of his cigarette and opened the doors to the passenger seat for her, still not looking at her.

“Hop on,” he rasped, and his voice took her back to that night two days ago. Come on, lemme hear ya, girl, come for me. She blushed, but did what Daryl asked, trying not to show him how much it bothered her that he didn’t even look at her for more than a second. Beth didn’t make herself pretty just for him; obviously, it was for her own gain, but it would be nice to see or hear that he noticed. Oh, but who was she kidding? It was all for him, all to make him see that she was a woman enough to be with him. She was so worried that he’d changed his mind, she had to do something, to try and show him. Just in case he didn’t know yet. Just in case he had any second thoughts. But here they were, and he wasn’t even looking at her.

Beth watched him round the car, his fingers drumming on the hood and eyes shooting worried glances around. Boy, she wasn’t the only one nervous, was she? Perhaps that’s why he didn’t look at her for long—too scared to be seen with her? Please, don’t be regretting it already, she pleaded with him in her head, shooting him short glances from her seat.

They drove in silence for some time, Daryl playing with the radio and not finding anything but some radio interviews, weather forecasts, or religious channels. He was getting more and more agitated with it by the minute.

“Fuckin’ piece of junk,” he finally gave up, annoyed, hitting the space above the radio in retaliation and leaving some interview on. The woman on the radio was asking the psychologist they hosted about the prolonged effects of suppressing emotions. Beth snorted.

“That’s funny to you, huh?”

The audition was, not his anger, but something told her that this argument wouldn’t actually help. She raised her hands a little in a peaceful gesture.

“Not at all, Mr. Dixon,” she drawled, and when he glanced at her, she did offer him a small reassuring smile.

Daryl averted his eyes from her just as quickly as before, not returning her smile, and they drove in silence again. Beth watched him from the side as he was biting into his fingers in a familiar nervous gesture and staring ahead at the road with a frustrated glint in his eyes. What got his panties in a twist? If he didn’t want to be here with her, then why did he come?

Operating through a relationship with Daryl, no matter if romantic or not, was sometimes like walking through a minefield, Beth wrote in her diary the day after their first training. You never knew what was hidden under your foot, and each step could blow in your face. But she knew it was worth it because once she got to the safe zone, there was this whole field of flowers there, not so unlike the one in their clearing, and she so loved their colors. She wanted to see them all: all colors of Daryl Dixon’s soul. And if that meant walking through the minefield from time to time? So be it. Only, Beth sometimes wished she knew how to help him, what words to use to make it all better. She was on the verge of simply asking him if the road offended him somehow when he broke the silence.

“I’m sorry.” Beth stayed silent, watching him, letting him turn over the words in his head and tell her at his own pace. It took him a while, but when he finally mumbled the rest of it, it was worth the wait. “I-uh, wanted you to have somethin’ nice to listen to on the way. Got this CD, some girl you liked, Taylor somethin’, but, uh… this damn piece of junk won’t play it, and I ran outta time tryin’ to fix it. As if that ain’t bad enough, now there’s no damn music on any station. End of the fuckin’ world.”

Daryl hit the car above the radio with a newfound frustration, but Beth couldn’t help but smile, warmth spreading from her heart to the rest of her body.

“What are you smilin’ for now?” He asked, but this time his voice had a softer edge to it.

“You remember what I like to listen to,” she explained, finding his eyes when he looked away from the road for a second.

“‘Course I remembered,” he mumbled back, sounding a little offended now as he turned back to the road ahead. “What, you think it’s all just…”

Daryl glanced at her again, waving his arm in her direction, and this time his eyes strayed lower, down to her dress. Daryl didn’t linger, but he swallowed down whatever he wanted to say, the tips of his ears darkening significantly, and then turned back to the road without another word.

“I don’t think that, Daryl.” She assured him, having a pretty good idea on what was on his mind. Beth had no idea why he’d worry about that. She had no reason to think it was only about sex for him. Not after all the days they’ve spent together at the clearing. Not after all the little ways in which he showed her that he cared. And even if he didn’t, she knew him now. She knew he wasn’t like that. Beth shook her head, then added firmly: “I could never think that.”

Daryl hummed in response, somewhat detached, and Beth averted her eyes, a bit downhearted.

Why was it so awkward between them? It should be better now that they gave into temptation, shouldn’t it? They were getting so comfortable with each other thanks to all these meetings and training, but now it seemed like it was all gone. As if making out with each other and listening to each other on the phone the other day canceled it all out, or brought some other different kind of tension between them. Beth didn’t get why Daryl was acting that way, but she had to do something about it. Only she had no idea what. How to fix it? Beth bit into her lip, thinking of anything to say to ease the awkwardness.
And then, following an impulse, Beth turned off the radio.
“What’re ya doin’?”

“You wanted music, right?” Daryl glanced at her, nodded, his eyebrows still furrowed. Alright, she could do that. She could sing to him, right? Show him that it was all good between them. No reason for all this jitteriness. Beth was used to doing that—singing in front of friends and family, at churches, at home, at Christmas dinners, and then at the Founder’s gala—but somehow, this felt different. More intimate. And as she started, the words of her song coming to her and getting out before she could really think that through, Beth felt her voice trembling a little from nerves.

“Could you drive, drive me home. It's too late to be walking all alone. And when you stop in front of my door, we can call the kiss an accident.”
She blushed seeing him watch her, glancing on the road ahead and back at her, his eyes dark and focused. She wished she had her guitar with her, because without it she was feeling a bit restless, not knowing what to do with her hands. Beth had only ever sung this particular song to herself when nobody was home. It was too personal to share, written during one of the sleepless nights when she couldn’t do anything but think about him. Sharing it now with him felt like exposing her soul again, but she had to do something to make it alright again, right? Beth had no idea how that was going to help, but it was better than nothing, she supposed.

“Blame it on the moon. Blame it on the booze. We've got opportunity, baby, and every excuse.”

Beth stopped, her voice dying in her throat when Daryl pulled over. She looked at him, wanting to ask if everything was alright, but he just shook his head.

“Go on, keep singin’,” he asked her, and she smiled lightly before picking up the song again. It was the middle of the day, sun shining on them high in the sky, so he had to see the way her cheeks went all red, having his focus on her entirely.

“Oh, I've been watching you all day in those dark sunglasses. And I've been wanting you more and more with every moment that passes. You like to say it's all wrong, I like to say it's all right. The type that never hurts. But to see you at this party feels like a sign from the universe. But, if it's not, say you got drunk and lost, lost, lost.”

At first, she didn’t dare to look at him, but her heart couldn’t take it for too long. Beth had to see, had to know if he liked her singing. Their eyes met, and now that he was no longer driving, they stayed locked through the rest of the song. A few months ago, she would’ve never guessed she would be here, singing to him one of the songs she wrote about him on one of the sleepless nights.

When she finished, the silence that fell upon them was no longer awkward. No longer strange. It was loaded with something else entirely.

“Was that…?” Daryl cleared his throat, his voice suddenly rougher. “That Taylor something’s song?”

The question made her blush even harder under his gaze.

“No, that wasn’t Taylor Swift,” she admitted. “I wrote it.”

About you. For you. Because I’m so awfully lovestruck I can’t sleep at nights thinking of all the things I want.

“Mhmm.” He bit his lips, pondering something, then asked timidly, “Who… who is it about?”

She felt the air leave her lungs all at once.

“You’re jokin’, right?!” She couldn’t help the high pitch in her voice, quickly getting offended. There’s no way he could be this oblivious! Beth opened her mouth in shock, and whatever was on her face made Daryl crack a smile, a small huff of laughter escaping him against his will. She punched him in the arm.

“Not funny.”

“Mmhmm, sure, sorry,” he said, not looking sorry at all, but smiling now, all his frustration and weird energy gone. “It was…”

“Silly? Yeah, I know, I just…”

“I was gonna say pretty,” he cut her off, and all she could say to that was a lovestruck, “Really?” He swallowed audibly, looking away from her to the road ahead. “I like your voice. And the rhymes. You’re good at it.”

The praise made her heart race.

“Yeah?”

“Yeah, but you’re a filthy liar, Greene. Never even seen me in sunglasses.”

She blushed, spluttering a little at the call out.

“Oh, sue me, Dixon! It was the best rhyme I could find, alright?!”

His laughter made her laugh, something tugging at her heartstrings as she watched him start the car again. When a few minutes later, he turned on the radio again and State of Grace started playing, Beth took it as another sign. And if Daryl minded her singing through most of that ride, he never said anything, but if she were to bet, judging by the looks he was sending her, he was more than fine with it.

The fair in Atlanta was busy with families, couples, and other folk, and as they entered (after he paid for them at the counter, a big, mean-looking lady eyeing them with suspicion), she started worrying it would be too much for Daryl. There were many people around, glancing at them as they went by, the unusual pair: a young, well-raised girl and an older, mean-looking guy. The lights were a little blinding, colorful orbs blinking at them from all directions, accompanied by the loud, catchy music mixed with the sounds of games played all around.

Daryl was walking next to her, glancing left and right, even more out of his element now than he was back at her house. She hated to see him like this, not only because she wanted him to have a good time on their first real date, but also because it was his first time in a place like this. Beth wanted him to have a good experience.

He flinched when she took his hand in hers but didn’t pull back. A good sign.

“You know what? I think we should start with some roller coasters. I bet you’re gonna love them,” she told him, leading him to some of the biggest attractions. “I mean, there’s not as many here as you’d find at Six Flags, but it’s a good start.”

“Six what?” he asked, and she shot him a surprised look. She kept forgetting how different their upbringings were, always caught off guard by his lack of knowledge on things she thought were well-known facts. He probably thought the same about her.

“Six Flags. It’s the name of an amusement park. The closest one to us is in Austell, I think.”

“Mhmm. Is it fun?”

“Yeah, so much fun!”

Daryl nodded, his eyes darting to food stalls and other booths, offering games such as ring toss, balloon darts, basketball shoots, and water gun races.

“You sure we’re not gonna run into someone we know here?”

“Yeah, pretty sure. My friends are plannin’ on coming here next week.”

They passed the crossbow-style game, and Beth made a note to herself to come back here and let Daryl play after some of the bigger rides.

Daryl grunted, then asked again, “What about Maggie?”

“She’s on her big Europe trip with some college friends. Stop worrying!”

I will make you relax and have fun, Daryl Dixon, just watch me, she thought to herself, and then did just that. Everywhere they went, she asked him how he liked it, committing his reactions and funny little comments to memory so that she could write about them in her diary later.

They got off the Zipper ride, and Daryl threw his arm around her shoulders and murmured, leaning on her heavily, “Shoulda told me not to eat anythin’ today. Thought I was gonna barf.”

He was screaming like crazy at the Drop Tower, and as soon as they got down, he turned to her, eyes all shiny, and asked if they could go again.

After the Pendulum ride, he didn’t even ask—just snatched her hand and pulled her back to the queue.

He took one look at the Zero Gravity ride and said “nope,” but when she hung on his arm, pleading with him, he rolled his eyes and went with her anyway. When they got off, he didn’t say anything, but as she jumped up and down happily, thanking him for going with her, he watched her with the softest look on his face.

When they were in the fun house, he said he couldn’t see the point of this. “Where’s the fun in a room full of damn mirrors?” he said, but she caught him following her reflections around, checking her out not so subtly. He was eyeing her ass in one of the mirrors when she came up behind him and asked cheekily, “Having fun yet?” His ears stayed red for the remainder of their visit in the fun house. Not even moving floors fazed him as much as her little comment did.

He didn’t want to go for bumper cars, saying it was for the kids, but when she called him a coward and jumped into one, he raised his finger at her, snatching a blue car for himself. “You’ll eat them words, Greene,” his voice dropped to a growl when he threatened her, and Beth had to hold her breath to not whine from the sudden wave of desire. Then Daryl proceeded to target her and her solely, not fazed by all the kids bumping into him on his way to get her.

They went for some corn dogs after that, and this time, he was the one that caught her staring. But could you really blame her? She’d never seen anyone lick their fingers as obscenely as he did. He was sucking the grease off them one by one, thoroughly, loudly, and it would be embarrassing if it wasn’t so arousing. When Daryl caught her watching him with her mouth hanging open, the bastard smirked around his digit, pulled it out with a pop, and asked, “Want me to do yours too?”

She pulled her hand away, laughing, when he reached for it, her face catching on fire.

“No! Gross,” she exclaimed against herself, her voice a little high-pitched as she pulled him to the lemonade stand next.

“Want to go on the Ferris wheel now?” Beth asked him once they got their drinks, and off they went to another attraction of the day.
They sat next to each other, and after the tech guy fastened their seats for them, Beth reached for Daryl’s hand again. The crowd seemed to stop bothering him that much once they started going for rides, but only now, as the distance between them and all the other people became bigger, did he fully relax. Beth smiled, looking around them, at everything they left down on earth, before taking a huge breath of fresh air.

That was nice. Wind in her hair, happy music, lemonade in hand, coming down from all the excitement with him sitting so close—it was all she could have wanted from their first date. She let herself close her eyes for a moment, simply enjoying her surroundings. It was such a good idea to come here, to have this day with him.

“I hope you’re liking it so far,” she said after a moment of comfortable silence.

“Mhmm,” was all he said in a way of response, and Beth opened her eyes to look over at him. It took another minute or two of Daryl just looking down on the array of food stalls with local products and foods, rides and games, and the crowds gathering around them before he spoke again. “Funny. Looks just like the movies, don’t it?”

Beth smiled, hearing him speak his mind.

“Yeah, pretty much.”

She looked down as well, on every ride and fun activity they went to. It felt even more special to her to be here with him, knowing it was his first time. She went back to the thought she had before that day, about their upbringing being so different. There was a whole wide world of possibilities, of all the firsts they could have with each other. She would love that, to have as many first times with him as possible, and for him to have them with her.

“Kids at school always went on dates and other shit to places like these.” His words pulled her out of her daydreams. “I tried going once, just me, stole some money from my dad’s pockets to afford it.”

Daryl didn’t share this story with her the last time they were talking about this, only said that he’d never been to any fairs. He sounded nostalgic now, sad maybe even, and Beth felt a squeeze in her tummy. Not a funny one. If there was one thing she didn’t like about the differences between their childhoods, it was how his consisted mostly of sad memories.

“And why didn’t you?” Beth asked, even though she would rather hug him and erase all the bad things he had to experience with her touch. But Beth knew that’s not how it worked, and if he wanted to talk about it, she wanted to listen.

Daryl shrugged, shuffling back from where he was looking down on everything. He looked at her now, and her heart soared.

“Met some kids from school at the entrance. They laughed at me, so I punched one of them in the face, started a fight. The guards threw us out before I could see anythin’.”

“Oh. And you never tried again?”

Daryl shook his head.

“The Fair closed the next day, and by the time they came back, I decided Fairs were a stupid waste of good money. I thought, what did I need the games for, if I could take my dad’s gun or my uncle’s crossbow and go shoot some live targets in the woods? Cost no money.” Beth hummed thoughtfully, watching him talk with his hands and jaw, his whole body involved in the communication, even now, so high up. Daryl noticed her look and stopped for a second. Then nodded at her with his chin. “Why do you like it so much?”

Beth shrugged.

“I guess, I always liked the spirit of it all. You know, friends or family gathering together to have some fun, eat nice food, and try themselves in different games. I like the music and the lights, the whole shebang, you know?”

“You don’t think it’s… I dunno, fake?”

He sounded unsure now, biting into his lip after uttering that last word. Worried about upsetting her maybe? But she was a long way from being upset sitting with him here, so far away from home, with wind in her hair, his hand still in hers, and with nobody to judge them for it. And if he questioned her, if he didn’t understand, she was just going to explain, just like he did for her every time she didn’t know how to do something during their training sessions.

“Fake?”

“Yeah, it’s like… I always thought, seein’ places like these in movies, it all looked fake. The lights blinding and the music loud, all so catchy, all set up just right to make you wanna play another game. Merle always said they rigged the games too, to have them dumb, lovestruck idiots buy more tickets, ‘cause somewhere along the line America decided the biggest sign of love is to win a lame plushie at some silly little Fair. Just stupid.”

Beth blushed, looking down now, embarrassed. Jimmy never won her anything at any Fairs they’d been to, not that they ever went on a date to one. Jimmy always wanted to go in together with friends, the bigger the group, the better, and he only ever won things for himself. Not that Beth expected him to give her something, of course. But wasn’t she? Expecting that a little? Wasn’t she disappointed every time when he didn’t?

Beth shook her head, going back to their conversation just as the wheel went for the second spin.

“It’s not stupid,” she told him, shrugging the embarrassment off. “To give a gift to someone you love and care about, wanting to make them smile. I think it’s romantic.”

Beth couldn’t help but smile a little at her own words. She always liked thinking about love. She would spend her time watching all those romantic movies, imagining falling in love like that one day, imagining the perfect love story. That perfect guy. If that little girl could see her now, she would be awfully disappointed.

Angry even. She could almost hear her say, That’s not my prince charming. Where is that perfect guy I wanted, Beth?

“Yeah, romantic, sure.” Daryl’s voice raised her from her thoughts. To someone else, he might have sounded mean just then, but she knew him better than that. He was watching her again, a strange, thoughtful glint in his eyes. Beth felt the butterflies returning to their spot in her tummy as her pulse quickened and a wave of emotions hit her square in her chest. The Ferris wheel was spinning, the music playing somewhere around their heads, the whole Fair under their feet, but all she could see in that moment were those blue eyes of his. Forget about the perfect guy, he could never make you feel this way. “Always thought that was bullshit too, you know?”

His voice dropped down to low notes, hoarse as always, raising goosebumps on her skin. She had no idea where that conversation was going, but she felt it in her bones all the same. Something important was happening.

“Why?”

“Figured love didn’t exist pretty early on. For one, it seemed like a cheap trick to make people buy shit. Not only at the Fairs, Valentine’s too, and all the other holidays. Made it into somethin’ romantic, shit givin’.”

“It’s not like that…,” she interjected, but he didn’t let her get into it.

“And it never sat right with me, that whole idea that folks just meet an' get struck by some damn lightning, an’ suddenly, they can’t see nothin’ but that one person… Hell, it’s mighty convenient for all them cheatin’, lyin’ bastards, claimin’ it’s love when all they want’s to get their rocks off,” Daryl muttered, his eyes shifting away from hers. He dropped her hand, fiddlin’ with his fingers, his gaze fixed on the sky. Beth chewed on her lip, a little caught off guard by where this conversation had gone. Her mind started racing—was he tryin’ to let her down easy? Tellin’ her it was just attraction, nothin’ more? Maybe she’d been romanticizin’ all those quiet moments they shared. Maybe it was simpler than she thought.

“An' havin’ that one person, the one who’s just right for ya in every damn way you could imagine? Someone who gets ya, accepts all yer shit?” He let out a soft exhale, the words heavy on his chest. “All I ever saw was the damage that crap did to folks who believed in it—people hurtin’ each other, callin’ it love after. You know, as a kid, watchin’ my old man beatin’ his love into my mom’s head... I thought it was all a load of shit. A damn fairytale for all the naive idiots out there. Just some stupid, commercialized feelin’, all just hormones and shit..”

“Is that…” What are we doing here then? Why do you keep looking at me like this then? “Do you still think that?”

Daryl looked back to her, the lights from the Fair reflected on his face. Beth had never seen a more serious, more haunted expression on his face than in that moment, when he shook his head, a silent, barely there no escaping his mouth as well.

Beth could swear time stopped. The Ferris wheel stopped spinning and the whole world went silent, detached, just for this little beautiful admission. She didn’t want to assume, she didn’t want to be delusional about it, but her heart took a leap in her chest.

“What… what changed your mind?” Her voice was soft, softer than ever perhaps, and she was glad it came out that way as she felt a more high-pitched sound could spook him. Could break the spell, cheapen this awfully delicate, but groundbreaking thing that was happening between them.

“Y’knw,” he mumbled in a way of response, and she couldn’t help but roll her eyes at him, a little bit of playfulness coming back to her tone.

“Don’t y’knw me, what changed your mind?”

It was consuming her, the way his eyes traced her face, those dark beautiful blues of his. It was as if her whole world was narrowing down to them every single time, and she couldn’t think, she couldn’t breathe. The only thing she could do was fall even deeper in love with him. And the way he looked right back at her? The way he just stared purposely? It told her everything she needed to know.

“Oh.”

The Ferris wheel came to an abrupt stop before he could say anything more and they had to get their asses up and out of the space they occupied for the last few minutes. The moment was broken, the words not spoken, but as she laced their fingers again on their way back to the booths and he used it to pull her closer, put his arm around her shoulder, and hug her into his side, she realized she already knew.

This time he was leading them, and as they walked next to all the things he said he wanted to try, she couldn’t help but laugh.

“Where are you taking me? We’re leaving all the good stuff behind!”

“You’ll see,” he murmured and soon enough the booth came into view. The one she was eyeing on their way to the rollercoasters. It was the one where you had to shoot small bolts at moving wooden targets. Perfect for him, really.

There was already another guy there with his girl, trying to win a prize, and a bunch of friends cheering him on. He botched every single one of his shots though.

“Oh, come on! This game is clearly rigged!” He accused, throwing his hands in the air.

“Show that thing to me,” Daryl reached for the crossbow and the man behind the counter started sputtering.

“Hey, hey! It’s not rigged, alright? No need to…”

“Relax, I just want to play.” He gave the man a few chips and that shut him up.

“Have at it, man. I’m outta chips anyway. It’s impossible to win this.” The guy surrendered the crossbow and joined his friends on the side. Beth watched Daryl look the small crossbow up and down. When he went to touch it, the guy behind the counter started sputtering again, which made her think that the game really was rigged. She hoped Daryl wouldn’t feel too bad for not…

The first bolt hit the target right in the middle and the group who stayed to watch cheered loudly. Beth smiled, ogling Daryl as he kept shooting, his muscles tight and sweet-looking in Georgia’s sun. She loved the way he moved, especially when he was shooting. His whole stance changed when he was in the zone like that. And just like back at their clearing when he taught her how to shoot his crossbow, Daryl hit every single target.

Once he was done he turned slightly to her, ignoring his cheering audience.

"Alright then, which one of these damn things you want?" Daryl grunted, looking back at the assortment of plushies like they were an inconvenience. Still, he gave her a sideways glance, waiting for her to pick one out.

Beth laughed, raising her finger to show him a big brown puppy. She’d always wanted a dog.

"For that one, you gotta win three times in a row."

It sounded like a lie, even the group that stayed to watch felt that way, if their booing was anything to go by. What an awful man…

"Oh, it’s okay then, I can..." She wanted to tell him that she’d just take another, but Daryl shook his head.

"Nah, that’s fine. Bring it on, old man."

Beth wanted to tell him that he didn’t need to do it, but she saw the stubborn look on his face and realized that it would be for nothin’.

As she watched Daryl shoot targets that kept moving faster and faster, she couldn’t help but smile with pride. That’s my man, she wanted to say to the group of cheering teenagers that kept getting closer and closer with every shot, entranced by the show of skill. The possessive nature of that thought surprised her. They still hadn’t talked about what it all meant; he still hadn’t technically told her that he wanted to be with her like that, for real and indefinitely, but here she was, already marking him as hers in her mind.

"A rigged game, my ass, you’re just that bad, mate," one of the boys said to his friend once Daryl dropped the crossbow, having hit all targets with ease.

"Nah," the biker turned to the group. "It is rigged. See, the bolts go slightly to the right, so you gotta position your hand right, or you’ll never hit nothin’. Here," he showed the boy how to shoot to hit the targets, his voice all gentle-like, and Beth suddenly thought back to Judith and how good he was with her. He told her it was because Judith was familiar with him, but now that she watched him help that random thirteen- or fourteen-year-old boy, she realized that was a lie. Daryl Dixon was definitely dad material, she thought, and then giggled to herself. Nobody would ever believe me if I told them.

The boy took the crossbow back, but he still had a sore expression on his face.

"Thanks, but I got no chips left anyway, so…" He smiled apologetically at his girl, but Daryl smirked in response, bringing the boy back to the counter with his hand on his shoulder.

"Nah, the man’ll let you try for free, right?"

"You lost your mind? I ain't doin’ no such thing!"

Daryl stopped, boring his eyes into the man’s face. He didn’t say anything, didn’t do anything else, just stared at him for an awfully long moment, making the guy sweat and sputter again.

"Fine! Here, try again!" The guy exclaimed finally, throwing his hands up and taking a step to the side.

"Good. Just don’t forget my dog, yeah?"

Daryl turned back to her, the stuffed dog in hand, and for a moment, she caught something different in his expression. Just a second ago, he’d been all confidence, throwing threats for some kids’ sake. But now, that serious look from the Ferris wheel had crept back.

"All yours," he said, giving her a slight nod as he handed over the biggest plushie from the booth. Did he mean just the dog or...?

"I thought you said it was stupid," she teased, clutching the plushie to her chest.

"Yeah, well. There’s this girl, she thinks..." he muttered, his voice quieter now. His gaze dropped to his boots, a few strands of hair falling across his face as he worried his lip. For a second, he seemed to wrestle with himself, licking his lips before glancing back up at her through his hair. Her knees nearly gave out at the sight. He shrugged, almost bashful. "You know."

I love you, Daryl Dixon.

Beth nearly said it out loud, wanting to shout it for the entire Fair to hear. Instead, she held his gaze, her heart hammering in her chest, as she stepped closer and rose up on her toes. She wrapped her other arm around him in a hug before leaning back, intending to kiss his cheek. She missed and her lips brushed the corner of his mouth.

His cheeks turned red as he pulled back slightly, his face tilted just enough to look at her properly.

"Thank you, Daryl. I love it," she said barely above a whisper, just for him to hear.

Beth leaned in again, ignoring the quick glance he darted at the crowd, and stole a soft, sweet kiss right there in the middle of the busy Fair. Daryl didn’t stop her, and Beth smiled into the kiss, her heart melting at the hitch in his breath and the way his arms circled her, his touch all gentle and careful.

When she pulled back, both of them were holding their breath. Daryl’s eyes flicked nervously around, scanning the crowd, but nobody seemed to notice—or care. His gaze returned to hers, and Beth caught the glint of vulnerability in his eyes under the glow of the lights.

She smiled again, then she took his hand into hers and leaned in again to steal another sweet kiss, before pulling away completely. Her voice was light, although a little shaky when she pulled him after herself: "Come on, let’s take some pictures now."

Notes:

Also, I only realized I put the "oh" moment in this story twice when I added the last chapter here, but just so you know, the one in the chapter before this one was accidental xD.

Chapter 22: I know what I want

Summary:

Beth and Daryl are still at the Fair and it's all going well... until it isn't.

Notes:

I don't even know what to say - you all are just making me so happy with all your comments, encouraging me to write another Bethyl story - thank you so much for all these kind words!
And I gotta tell you - I've been thinking about writing another one actually ;) I have an idea already, just no time to write it yet, so no promises, but you're making me want to do this even more with all the love in the comments <3
THANK YOU!

And also, I'm really sorry for what's about to go down in this chapter.

***

In hindsight, maybe taking pictures with someone you shouldn’t be seen with was not her best idea, but Beth was too busy being disgustingly happy to care or think about the consequences of her actions. She needed to capture this moment, to keep it forever, and what better way to do that than with some lovely photos? 

Daryl let her push him into the photo booth, laughing at her eagerness, but stopping abruptly once she fell down onto his lap. His hands came up to support her, one of them on her back, the other on her thigh, and as he gazed up at her, suddenly serious again, Beth found herself breathless. For once they were all alone, no prying eyes on them, and suddenly, with him so close, every other thought she had that day evaporated, swapped with overpowering desire.

She forgot all about the photos, the sound indicating that they should change their poses and prepare for another photo just a background noise. She leaned in, the air between them becoming dense, electric almost. They were both smiling, her with her whole face, him mainly with his eyes, the corner of his lips rising up in a half-smile. Her nose bumped into his lightly. She let herself hover for a second before closing the remaining distance. She barely even tasted the lemonade they had on the Ferris wheel on his tongue when Daryl pulled away. She chased his lips, but his hand on her cheek stopped her.

“Hold up,” he drawled, a smirk tugging at his lips. “Think this damn thing stopped.”

“Let’s get you your own copies then, yeah?” she asked, leaning back a little to press the button and take another series of photos.

“Beth, we can’t…” She swallowed the rest of that sentence, all too happy to prove him wrong, her fingers tangling in Daryl’s hair as she angled his face to deepen the kiss. Daryl didn’t oppose her any longer, answering her kisses with the enthusiasm of a starved man. If Beth could, she’d never stop kissing him. His lips were firm and unrelenting against hers, but his touch, as he moved his hand to cradle her face, was tender, soothing even. Beth melted into him, feeling both the rush of desire and the overpowering sense of belonging. It only made sense to her now, only with him, why people liked doing this so much, why it was so amazing. The intensity of his kiss sent fireworks bursting behind her closed eyelids, bringing the kind of thrill that left her aching for more. Yet there was something timeless about the way he held her, as if they’d been here before, as if they’d always meant to fit together like this.

Beth wasn’t sure how long they stayed like that, the machine silent for a long time and the outside world far, far away. When Daryl broke the kiss, he seemed just as overwhelmed with emotions as she was, his chest heaving and lips trembling slightly, even as a flicker of amusement lit his eyes. He licked his lower lip, chasing the feeling of her there, before he rasped:

“We go on like that,” he adjusted his grip on her, his dark orbs boring into her in a manner that sent goosebumps up her spine. Beth traced the lines of his lips, still faintly swollen from their kiss, with her eyes, mesmerized, and he swallowed tightly watching her back, as if he was well aware of every thought that went through her head, “and we’re gonna have strips of nothin’ but your face smashed up against mine.”

Beth giggled.

“What’s wrong with that?” she teased, poking him lightly in the ribs. “We’re just havin’ fun.”

He huffed a laugh, shaking his head. “Yeah, nothin’ says ‘fun day at the fair’ like pictures of us makin’ out plastered on your corkboard.” He teased her, glancing at her lips before quickly looking away. He reached up to press the machine’s button, resetting the timer. “Come on, let’s take some proper ones.”

Beth smiled, her heart swelling at the sight of him.

“You’re adorable when you’re flustered, you know that?”

“Ain’t flustered,” he grumbled, though the faint pink creeping up his neck said otherwise.

The machine clicked, capturing her mid-laugh and him looking sideways at her with a mix of exasperation and reluctant affection, smiling at her lightly. As the machine beeped again, Beth darted in and kissed his cheek, grinning mischievously. It earned her a low groan, and she squeaked when Daryl moved suddenly, throwing his arm around her shoulders and forcing her closer. She laughed, turning her face away from him as he tried to lick her cheek in retaliation for the teasing. Another beep and then she made a face at him, scrunching her nose and showing him her tongue as she brought her plushie in between them. He mirrored her, turning slightly more to the camera in front of them, and after another flash, Beth broke into another fit of giggles. She bumped his shoulder with hers and raised her finger at the camera then, him following her and doing the same. It was the last picture that she deemed her favorite though, because he took her face in his hands and smacked his lips on her cheek.

“Hey! Are you done?! People are waiting out here!” someone shouted from outside and Beth couldn’t help but giggle again as she pulled a red-cheeked Daryl Dixon out of the photo booth.

“We’re done,” he grumbled, shoving the strips of photos into his pocket on his way out. Then he leaned in, muttering to her: “That’s it. No more damn pictures, got it?”

“Not unless I get you in another booth!” She showed him her teeth in a big, goofy smile and Daryl snorted.

“Ain't happenin’,” he grumbled, but the way he eyed her, his eyes warm and glinting in the lights, told her he didn’t really mean it. Daryl’s hand lingered at her waist as he led her away from a line of people that gathered in front of the booth they were just occupying, his touch making her shiver again, and Beth wished for this feeling to never end. All that touching and kissing had left her feeling dizzy.

It was bound to end in disaster though. She should have known. It was all going too well. The rides, the flirting, the Ferris wheel, her new puppy, and finally the photo booth full of intense, passionate kisses followed by a series of lighthearted photos of them doing funny faces and smiling at each other. By all means, a perfect date.

“Wanna try somethin’ sweet now?” Beth asked him, and Daryl nodded, but the way his eyes bored into her face, his lips rising into a little smirk, made her blush. It made her think he’d like to try her. Not that he said that, but Daryl was holding her hand and every time she turned to smile at him, she couldn’t help but blush even more furiously, seeing the way he was watching her right back. Like she was, in fact, some kind of sweet treat.

“Beth?” She stopped abruptly, all color leaving her face when a familiar voice shot through the music and noisy crowd.

She turned around, her hand letting go of Daryl’s a second too late. There was her brother, standing next to some other guy, a forgotten milkshake in his hand.

For a few seconds, nothing happened. They just stood there, shock and disbelief painting their faces. Then Shawn’s eyes snapped up from where they froze—on her hand that was holding Daryl’s a few seconds ago—to Daryl’s face.

“I’m going to kill you.” His voice sounded surprisingly calm when he said that, a cold kind of rage in his stare. There was nothing calm about it when, a second later, he all but threw himself at Daryl with his fists up, screaming like a madman. “I’m going to kill you, you piece of shit! Ya hear me?! You scumbag! My sister!? Not my sister, you son of a bitch!”

He was throwing punches blindly, most of them missing Daryl, who was swiftly blocking Shawn’s punches and kicks, with no intention of fighting back.

“Shawn! Stop!” She pulled on Shawn’s shirt, and the boy staggered a little, the back of his arm circling back and hitting her right in the face. She fell back, tasting blood on her tongue as she bit into it. While Shawn didn’t even notice, she raised her head to meet Daryl’s worried glance. Their eyes met, and it was then that Shawn finally managed to hit his target, his hand connecting with Daryl’s cheek. Beth squeaked, getting up from the ground to try and separate them again. That’s when she saw the string of photos lying in the dirt. Beth snatched them right back, her eyes catching colorful images almost by accident. They weren’t theirs, but Shawn’s.

“Don’t you fucking touch my sister!” Shawn kept screaming, even as Daryl, having had enough, caught his arms mid-air and pushed back, swiftly pinning him against one of the booths. “Don’t touch her, hear me?! You…”

Daryl pressed his elbow into Shawn’s throat, cutting off his air. Shawn struggled, his breath coming in short gasps and his hands flying to Daryl’s arm to pry it off. That’s when the boy who was standing next to Shawn earlier rushed to her brother’s aid, and Beth finally snapped back to reality.

“Daryl, no!” She barely started her protests when Daryl let go of Shawn, stepping back. The boy fell to the ground, heaving, and Beth watched the guy he was with fall to his knees in front of him.

“You okay?” Beth raised her eyes up to Daryl. A bruise was forming under his eye, but he didn’t seem to notice. The biker took her chin in his hand, looking her over with a grimace on his face. It didn’t even hurt when she got hit; adrenaline pumping through her veins made sure of that, and she was pretty sure she was okay, but Daryl looked worried all the same.

“I’m fine. You?”

He didn’t get to answer her, as that’s when Shawn chose to come to himself.

“I said… DON’T. TOUCH. HER.” Beth’s eyes went back to her brother. That raven-haired, lanky boy in glasses was helping him stand up, his hands gentle and careful. Beth looked back down at the photographs in her hand of this same boy and her brother making faces and kissing in the photo booth she was in with Daryl not so long ago.

“Are you sure you’re okay?” the guy kept asking until Shawn finally looked at him.

“Yeah, just peachy, Chris! My sister’s here with…”

“Chris?” Beth couldn’t help but interject, a realization hitting her full force now. “As in… Chrissy? Your internet girlfriend Chrissy?”

Shawn’s eyes widened for a second, but then he surged forward again.

“We’re going home. Now!” He tried grabbing her, but she pushed his hands away and jumped back with ease. Who did he think he was, telling her what to do? She was just a year younger than him.

“Forget it!”

“An overnight camping trip with Amy, yeah? You’re such a liar! Wait till our parents hear about it! And you…” Shawn turned to Daryl, raising his finger menacingly. “You’re going to jail where you belong, you psycho!”

“Stop! He’s not a psycho! And this is not what you think it is! If you’d just let me explain…” She grabbed him by his shirt again, pulling him away from Daryl. Shawn still looked as if he was seconds away from turning back into that maniac and starting another fight. That wouldn’t do. She had to make him understand.

“Explain?! You’re in Atlanta with a sexual predator and a murderer! What’s there to explain?!” His voice took on a high note at the end, betraying the panic hiding behind his tough pose.

“Shut up, Shawn. People are looking at us,” Beth hissed. Why did he always have to be like this? Loud and obnoxious? “And he’s neither of those! He’s…”

“What? Your boyfriend maybe?!” Beth flinched at his jeer. He’d never been this mean to her, and it hit her right where it hurt the most. How dare he laugh at her like that? “You think that’s what Sophia thought when he took her to the woods to…”

The slap cut him off abruptly. Beth startled, covering her mouth with her hand.

What had she done?

Shawn raised his own hand to his cheek, just as shaken up. She’d never hit him before. She’d never hit anyone before. Not outside of her and Daryl’s little clearing in the woods.

“I’m sorry, Shawn,” she said when the first shock at her own actions wore off. There were tears in her voice, but she knew she had to make him stop somehow. He couldn’t go to their parents. He couldn’t tell them about Daryl. Not now after this beautiful date, not when she was so painfully in love with Daryl already. Beth couldn’t stop seeing him now. She simply couldn’t. “But you won’t speak that way about him, and you won’t tell our parents, or anyone, about this. I’m on a camping trip with Amy until tomorrow…”

Shawn snorted.

“Like hell you are.”

She didn’t let him throw her off balance with his attitude. She was close to tears, hating what she was going to do but not seeing any other way out of this mess. Beth wasn’t going to let him ruin her happiness, and in that moment, her emotions so high, she used the only free-out-of-jail card she had.

“And you’re at your girlfriend’s place. With Chrissy, yeah? Or should I call our parents now, tell them that Chrissy is a boy? Is that what you want, Shawn?”

Shawn opened his mouth, his eyes widening yet again, and Beth bit her lip, shaking. Some nasty feeling found its way to her stomach, making her sick, and she knew it was all on her. He shook his head in disbelief.

“You… You’re blackmailing me, Beth?”

Beth swallowed audibly. You can’t take this away from me, Shawn.

“It’s an offer. A truce. Take it or leave it.”

They didn’t resemble each other much. Shawn and Maggie did a little, but with Beth being the only one of the three of them with blonde hair and light eyes, she stood out. However, right now, Beth could see the reflection of her suffering—her soul breaking—on Shawn’s face.

She was being cruel, she knew. There was a reason he’d never told anyone. A reason he went out of his way to hide this from their family, and Beth would love to hug him now. Tell him it was alright. The notion that he lived in fear of their judgment, not being able to be fully himself, was filling her with sorrow. After all the Sunday masses and meetings with church folk, what he deserved the most was support. But here Beth was, making herself part of the problem.

“You’ve lost your mind if you think I’m just gonna let you leave here with him, Beth.”

Don’t, Shawn, don’t make me choose.

“Fine! Have it your way. Let me just ask our dear old mom what she thinks about you lying to us the whole year, yeah?” She took her phone out, her words escaping her in a rush, adrenaline pushing her to do something she would come to regret dearly. She knew it already. “Do you think she’ll be happy to hear about your boyfriend? Or maybe I’ll just send her the pics instead, huh? What would she like more, you think?”

It was heartbreaking, the way Shawn’s eyes went all glassy and sad when she waved the strip of photos in front of his face. She jumped away when he tried to reach for it, backing herself into Daryl, who was just as silent behind her as Chris was next to Shawn. Her brother swallowed audibly, and when he finally spoke, his voice was almost as hoarse as Daryl’s.

“Who are you?” He was shaking his head, not quite believing this whole thing, and she felt for him, she really did. But Beth couldn’t have him run to their parents. His eyes snapped to Daryl for a second, then to Chris. When he finally looked back at her, all she could see were the tears.

“Do you really think I’m more scared of being outed to my homophobic mother than of you dying?”

He almost spat the words, shivering lightly. Beth gulped, forcing her own tears down.

“Daryl is not hurting me, Shawn,” she tried again. Please, please, understand. “He’s been teaching me how to fight, okay? I’ve been meeting with him to train, Shawn. The whole summer he’s been teaching me, making sure I can protect myself. And it’s… it’s really not the way you think it is. Me and Daryl are friends, and he’s not who you think he is. I think you know that—deep down, you know you’re just repeating this bullshit the town folk are saying! You, out of all people, should know it’s just that: bullshit! Just like their talk about queer people.”

“Don’t make it about me now! We’re talking about you and how you lied about where you were going! And this fighting thing? So what, you’ve been lying the whole summer?”

Beth’s frustration boiled over as she glared at Shawn, her voice sharp. “I could ask you the same thing, Shawn! Were you lying the whole year?” The question made him recoil, his jaw clenching as if struck by her words.

“Look, I can’t have you tell our parents, okay? I just can’t, Shawn. So please, let’s just go, alright? You go with Chris, and I go with Daryl, and we’ll just forget about this.”

Shawn’s eyes narrowed, and he shook his head with disbelief. The air between them thickened with tension as his words came out in a low growl. “And then what? Then I go back home tomorrow and find out you’re just gone? You didn’t come home? No. You’re going home with me.”

Beth’s heart pounded as he reached for her hand. She yanked it away, the anger rising in her chest like a firestorm. “No. I came here with Daryl, and I’m leaving with him. And look, you have no proof. I’ve got this,” she hissed, wiggling the photos in front of him, her eyes hardening. “So why don’t you take your boyfriend on some rides and let me live my life, Shawn?”

Shawn’s grip on the situation didn’t falter. He shook his head again and Beth eyed him with anger. Neither of them was willing to back down, both standing firm as if daring the other to move. A heavy silence filled the air, thick with unspoken threats, until Daryl stepped forward, his presence a wall between them.

He moved quietly, but there was a tension in his movements that made the air crackle. Daryl’s rough voice cut through the silence as he joined Beth’s side, his hand moving to extend the photos towards Shawn. 

“Here.” Shawn’s eyes flickered down to their strip of photos, the tension between them thickening as he studied them. “If she’s not back home by the time you come back, you take it to the police.”

“What? No!” Beth reached out, but Shawn snatched the pictures before she could. “What are you doing?”

She eyed Daryl in disbelief, a matching expression on Shawn’s face. Her brother looked down at the pictures, and Beth followed his gaze, relief washing over her at the sight of their silly faces and not passionate kisses. Shawn’s gaze flickered to Daryl, and Beth caught her breath. For a brief moment, her brother’s harsh glare softened into something uncertain, and Beth’s hope surged—just a little. Then he spoke:

“And why would I wait? I could go to the police now, tell them…”

Daryl snorted, trying to appear sure of himself, even as he shuffled his feet, clearly uncomfortable.

“Tell ‘em what? That your eighteen-year-old sister went to the Fair with me? That ain’t a crime.” 

Shawn's teeth clicked together and he looked back to the pictures, his eyebrows scrunching in thought. 

“Alright, I can go to our parents then. You just gave me proof.” Shawn eyed Daryl again, but this time some of his apprehension was gone, consideration taking its place. “Why?”

“If you show them these, I’ll show them yours,” Beth reminded him quickly, earning herself a glare from her brother.

Daryl bit the inside of his cheek in a nervous tick before murmuring, his voice rough: “If she went missin’, they wouldn’t arrest me without any proof, so this is it—a sure way to get me in jail if I hurt her. But, um, I won’t, and I want those back, so don’t lose ‘em.”

Shawn sighed heavily, glancing at the photographs of their smiley faces before giving Beth a stern look.

“Fine." Beth's heart jumped in her chest. She couldn't believe it. "I won’t tell Mom and Dad, and you can drive back with… him.”

Beth opened her mouth to thank him, but he didn’t let her.

“But, you’re not staying at his place tonight. We are going home. You and I.”

Beth closed her mouth, perplexed with him again. Why did he have to be so stubborn? Shawn fixed his gaze on Daryl next.

“I have to drive Chris back. You’ll follow me there, and then I’ll follow you back home. We can stop near the farm and have Beth switch the cars.”

Life was cruel to her for no reason, Beth decided, as she sat back in the car with Daryl, clutching her new puppy to her chest. This was not how that night was supposed to end.

Beth had it all planned so perfectly, and it was all going so well—everything leading to this big moment, in which everything would finally be clear. His feelings for her, her feelings for him. She could be his girl then. Officially. And then he could take her to his bed, make her his in all the ways possible.

“Camping with Amy, huh?” Daryl’s voice sounded loud in the silence of the car. None of them remembered to turn on the radio. “Didn’t tell me nothin’ of it.”

Was he listening in on her thoughts? She wondered not for the first time, blushing when he glanced at her.

“I had to tell them something,” she defended herself. “To, you know, explain why I’ll be gone for the whole day and…”

She fell silent. They never talked about her staying over at his place, and she knew she shouldn’t have assumed. Beth just kept making mistakes, didn’t she?

“And night?” He finished for her, his voice going an octave higher at the end as if the idea of it made him panic slightly. She hoped Daryl didn’t hear that part of her argument with Shawn, that he miraculously switched off for a moment, but it seemed that she was all out of luck on that day.

Beth averted her eyes from him, blushing.

“Y-yeah, I told them I won’t be home until tomorrow,” she admitted quietly, embarrassed. “But I didn’t want you to feel obliged to… you know, ask me to come back to your place. That’s why I didn’t tell you, and if you didn’t want that… I was going to go to Lily’s or something.”

Daryl hummed. They stayed silent for a while, trees sliding past the windows as the Fair receded further into the distance. When they stopped outside what was supposedly Chris’s home, Beth watched her brother walk the boy to his door. Absorbed in a hushed conversation, they leaned into each other’s space. She felt sick thinking about how she’d handled the situation. She wouldn’t be surprised if Shawn hated her now. Then again, he hadn’t been much of a good brother to her either, right? Attacking Daryl like that.

“I’m sorry our date was ruined,” she said, not taking her eyes off Shawn.

“Not your fault.” Daryl’s voice was low, and when she glanced at him, she found him watching Shawn too. “Don’t be too hard on him, alright? He’s just… worried, got every right to be…”

Beth snorted, blushing when Daryl’s eyes snapped to hers, as if on cue.

“No, he doesn’t. I’m not a kid, Daryl. I know you think it’s all wrong because you’re older than me, but I’m tired of people comparing this to what happened with Sophia. It’s not the same, not even close."

Beth hadn’t meant to raise her voice at the end, but she’d had enough of Shawn treating her this way, enough of Daryl blaming himself, enough of feeling like they were doing something wrong.

“It’s not, huh?” Daryl didn’t look convinced.

“It’s not,” she repeated firmly, pinning him with her gaze. “Sophia was twelve, Daryl. She really was a kid. And she was... a victims of someone who wanted to hurt her, someone twisted. But you're not like that and I'm not a kid." She fell silent for a moment, her voice growing a little distant as she tried to gather her thoughts. "You know, I’m a woman about to start college in a few weeks and I might be young, but I’m not clueless. I know what I want, Daryl. And I’m done letting other people make decisions for me."

Daryl hummed again, averting his blue eyes as he started the car when Shawn returned. They drove in silence for another moment before Daryl uttered a low, rough question—so quiet it sounded like he didn’t really want her to hear it:

“Yeah? So... what is it you want, then?”

“Just... you.” The words escaped her in a rush. Daryl’s hands twitched on the steering wheel, but his eyes stayed fixed on the road. “Us. I want to be with you, Daryl. For real. Not just spending time together. I want...”

He let out a sharp breath, his jaw tight, and his gaze flickered to her for a split second before he quickly looked back at the road.

“This ain’t gonna work.” He mumbled, his tone carrying a mix of frustration and self-doubt.

Beth felt something nasty squeeze in her stomach.

“So you don’t want to…”

“Didn’t say that.”

He glanced at her again, and the look he gave her—the same one he had on the Ferris wheel—took her breath away.

“But it ain’t, you know? I ain’t no good for you.”

Let me be the one to decide that, she thought but didn’t say, knowing it wouldn’t be helpful. She’d insisted on making her own decisions enough for one day. Now she needed to know what he thought, what decision he wanted to make. But wondering about that and asking outright were two different things. It was important, and maybe the car ride wasn’t the best place for this conversation.

She hated it though—how convinced he was of it, even after all they’d shared that day, even after all the happiness he’d given her.

“And what if you are good for me? You can’t know these things.”

Daryl snorted, shaking his head.

“Can’t even take ya out without somebody tryin’ to knock me out,” he said gruffly, his face contracting in a grimace. "Look, Shawn only let ya go ‘cause I gave him somethin’ to hang over my head, like if I hurt ya or somethin’,” Beth shook her head in disagreement. She didn’t understand why Daryl had decided to level with Shawn after what her brother had done. She wanted to say so, but Daryl didn’t let her interrupt. “And even without all these girls goin’ missin’ and all, no one would accept this—me bein’ with ya like that. It’s just… y’know.”

She did know. If it were anyone else, she’d be the first to say it wasn’t right—just like Amy had said. On paper, it didn’t look too good; Beth knew that. But how could she give Daryl up? It didn’t feel wrong when they were together like this. It felt amazing, and Beth had been truly, utterly happy this past month.

She didn’t care what society thought. For the first time in her life, Beth found herself thinking she didn’t care what her family thought, either. She loved them—each and every one of them—and she didn’t want to lie. But if they couldn’t understand this, if they told her to stop seeing Daryl? She wouldn’t. Beth knew that, too.

Her heart was already breaking at the thought of all the fights, all the battles she’d have to endure. But it would be worth it. For there was no better sight than Daryl’s eyes on her when he told her he was starting to believe love was real. There was no better place to be than in Daryl Dixon’s arms.

When Daryl pulled the car over again—not so far from the spot where they usually met for their training sessions—Beth didn’t get out right away. She hated that this was how it was going to end. It was just getting dark, and the evening would be long and beautiful. 

Beth didn’t want to leave Daryl like this, feeling guilty about Shawn’s reaction to seeing them. She didn’t like that her decisions were being made for her. Again. She wanted to make them herself. That’s when a dangerous idea popped into her head.

“You know what we should do?” Beth turned to him, smiling at his confounded look. “We should have a late dinner at your place. I go home with Shawn, you get dinner, and then you come and get me.”

“Girl, did ya hear anythin’ I just said?”

“I did, yeah, but you do want this, right? You and me?” Daryl didn't respond, but the look he gave her, haunted, almost burning her skin with its intensity, was enough reassurance. “And I want our first real date to end on a good note, okay? I don’t want to forever have this picture of you driving me back after Shawn made a scene. I want it to be good. And I don’t mean, you know, sex.”

She blushed as she said it, but considering how she’d been with him in the photo booth and her little plan to go back to his place later, it needed to be said. Beth didn’t want Daryl to panic or think it was all about that for her. Not that the idea didn’t make her panic slightly, too.

“We can just hang out. Eat. Watch a movie. A nice, innocent sleepover, yeah? Pick me up at ten? Here.”

Daryl’s eyes widened slightly, his brows furrowing as if trying to process her words, but he didn’t say anything. The idea of something so simple, like a sleepover, probably felt a little foreign or too intimate for him. When she leaned in and kissed him on the cheek, he stiffened, his eyes darting to the mirror, as if checking to make sure Shawn couldn't see them from his car. It made it easier for her to slip out before he could say anything, before he could argue with her idea.

"Wait, Beth..." He snapped out of it, his voice tight as he tried to call after her, but she was already out of the car, slamming the door behind her before he could say anything else. A strange energy washed over her, making her body tremble with anticipation as she walked back toward the truck.

It was a risky plan, she knew, but she’d watched Maggie sneak out after dark enough times to know it could work.

Not one rebellious bone in my body, yeah, Maggie? Just watch me.

Shawn didn’t say a word to her upon her entering the car, and neither did Beth. The car rattled down the dirt road, the engine’s hum the only sound between them as they neared their home. It wasn’t until the farm came into view that Shawn spoke:

“I never thought you could be so cruel, you know?”

Beth wasn’t sure if it was his tone or the words that made her flinch more violently.

“It’s not like you gave me a choice here, Shawn,” she murmured defiantly. “You wouldn’t let it go. What was I supposed to do? Just let you—”

“That guy’s dangerous, Beth,” he interrupted her, his knuckles whitening on the steering wheel. “Everyone knows it, but you just... what? Think you’re the exception? That you’re safe?”

“Yeah, I think I am! You know why? Because you’re wrong about him.”

Shawn snorted, and Beth turned her head away from him. Her eyes burned as fresh tears welled up. She swiped at them angrily.

“You don’t know him like I do,” she muttered finally.

“And you don’t know what the hell you’re getting yourself into,” Shawn shot back. “But sure, go ahead. Trust the guy with a crossbow and a record over your own brother.”

Silence enveloped them again as Shawn pulled into the driveway. Beth watched the house for another moment before trying again.

“Look, I’m sorry,” she said, her voice trembling. “I didn’t mean to hurt you, but you pushed me. You know you did. Mom and Dad can’t know about this, Shawn, and this was the only way…”

He laughed bitterly, shaking his head. “Yeah. The only way. Keep telling yourself that.” His voice broke at the edges, sharp with pain, anger, and something else she couldn’t name. “I mean, damn it, Beth. I almost told you before, you know? About me. About Chris. Out of everyone, I thought… I thought you’d understand.”

“I do, Shawn. It’s… If Chris makes you happy, that’s wonderful. Amazing, really.” Beth took a huge breath, steeling herself before she added, “But you gotta understand, Daryl makes me happy too, and…”

“No.” Shawn interrupted her. “Don’t even… I can’t listen to this bullshit. Just be glad I ain’t running to Mom and Dad. Don’t…”

He waved his hand, cutting himself off in the middle of the sentence, frustrated with her, and Beth sighed, defeated.

“You… you’re really not gonna tell them?” she asked, needing to make sure.

Shawn looked at her from his seat, his expression troubled, and Beth’s heart picked up its pace. Was he going to change his mind?

“I won’t. Not tonight at least.”

It was better than nothing, she supposed.

Beth didn’t call Shawn out on making her lie to their parents again when he shouted at her for the same thing just a little over an hour before. They told them they were camping close to each other and didn’t even know until they saw one another in the woods. Chrissy, Shawn’s girlfriend, had to go home early due to some family emergency, and Beth decided to go with Shawn after all to not trouble Amy’s sister. Their parents didn’t even bat an eye at the lies, nor did they comment on both of them locking themselves in their respective bedrooms right after coming home.

She pretended to get ready for bed: taking a shower, going down for a glass of water in her pajamas, saying goodnight to her parents, and kissing their cheeks before going back up to change from the pajamas to something more suitable—just a t-shirt and sweatpants.

Beth turned off the light and lay in her bed with her phone in hand. There were several messages from Daryl, which was surprising. He wasn’t into texting that much. Usually, he just called her back if she sent him a question and only ever sent her texts to ask if she was home safe.

Daryl 8:41
You sure about this?

Daryl 9:14
You didn’t tell me what you wanted to eat.

Daryl 9:21
Ain’t a good idea, Beth.

Daryl 9:22
You should stay home.

Daryl 9:37
Got you some Chinese.

Daryl 9:38
Merle can eat it if you changed your mind.

Daryl 9:48
You stayin home or what?

Beth smiled to herself. Daryl was cute when he was nervous about something. Not that she didn’t find him cute no matter what he did.

Beth 9:50
No, I’m not staying.

She went to the doors and cracked them open to listen to all the noises inside the house. Greene's home was all silence and darkness, everyone cooped up in their rooms, probably asleep, or in Shawn’s case, probably glued to his computer screen again. Beth shut the doors quietly and shuffled to the window. She pulled her sneakers out from under her bed, then tiptoed to the windowsill and pulled the shoes on her feet before opening it. The yard was completely dark, which worked well for sneaking up, not so well for descending down the wooden grid that was overgrown with flowers.

“If Maggie can do it, so can you,” she whispered to herself as she sat herself on the windowsill and pulled her legs to the other side. Beth found her footing, that strange excitement pushing the breath out of her lungs as she thought about what was waiting for her right behind the treeline.

Beth heard the crack under her boot a second too late. Her left foot lost support, and she slid down slightly, losing her footing. The second crack came from above her head, and down she went. It happened fast, but for her, it was as if time slowed down. She squeezed her eyes closed, a silent squeak escaping her as she landed in someone’s strong arms.

“You good?”

“Yeah,” Beth released a shuddering breath. “I'm fine now, Daryl.”

He fastened his hold on her, one of his hands squeezing her under her knees, the other on her back, and Beth responded by encircling his neck and pulling herself closer. Nothing would ever feel as good as the thrill of kissing him, she decided when their lips met again.

Daryl let her kiss him for only a short moment before he pulled away and whispered,
“Let’s go, yeah?”

“Yeah,” Beth nodded, smiling, and when he put her down on the ground, she took his hand in hers and squeezed. They ran together, hand in hand, until they disappeared behind the treeline, his bike coming into sight. Beth’s heart was thundering in her chest, her whole body shaking in anticipation. She'd never felt more alive than in that moment.

Chapter 23: I think I can make you happy

Summary:

Beth gets what she wished for: a sleepover at Daryl's place. What will it lead to?

Notes:

I’ve got to tell you: this one was tough. I can’t count the number of times I rewrote this chapter because it just kept coming out all wrong and not the way I wanted it. But we’re finally here.

I’m so glad so many of you are enjoying this story so much and leaving me all these lovely comments – you’re the best! <3

I was actually worried about the last chapter too because I knew what Beth had to do was cruel, and I also have a brother (don’t tell, but I kinda gave Shawn his personality xD), so it was even more emotionally taxing to write that chapter.

This one, though? This one was hard for different reasons. I’m not going to go into them now – wouldn’t want to spoil anything – so just... I hope you enjoy it. Sorry for adding it so late in the week.

****

The apartment was dark and silent when they came in, and even though Beth told Daryl the night wasn’t going to end in sex, suddenly she was all nervous. As she took her seat on the sofa, she kissed him for the first time—at least, the first time she remembered—and watched him as he moved through the kitchen. Beth felt her whole body vibrating with frantic energy. She tried calming herself down with some deep breaths, but to no avail. Her heartbeat was fast, her tummy churning with butterflies, and her cheeks heated. She could only stare at Daryl’s broad shoulders, the way his muscles flexed as he reached for the cups and then the tea bags.

His movements were precise and deliberate, the way they always were, and there was that quiet intensity to him—like he was always ready, always aware of everything around him, even when he appeared to be at ease. Tonight, it seemed somewhat enhanced, though, as if her presence was making him even more alert, like something in the air had shifted the moment they entered the apartment to discover it completely empty. No sign of Merle, even though Daryl told her that he was home. Perhaps it was the stillness of the place that made her suddenly very aware of every single implication of what they were doing now.

She was spending the night at Daryl’s place after a lovely date with him, after some heated kisses, and after literally having phone sex with him. She was spending the night, and she hadn’t even thought about sleeping arrangements until now. It occurred to her that he might choose to share a bed with her.

The notion made her think about how overpowering and consuming the desire she felt for him was, how each and every time they kissed, she felt like it wasn’t enough—like she wanted more, like she wanted his hands all over her body, like she wanted him to kiss her skin in places she’d never thought she’d want anyone to. Like she wanted to run her hands through his hair, slide her fingers down those tanned arms, down his broad chest… Like she wanted to touch him in a way that would make him groan, perhaps even sob in pleasure. Like she wanted to do to him all the dirty stuff the cheerleaders were always talking about after practice.

Beth swallowed hard, feeling like she might combust with the tension in the room. Daryl’s gaze was flicking to her just often enough to make her wonder if he was sensing her growing nervousness—if he, too, felt the same heat simmering under his skin.

“Why don’t ya pick some movie for us?” he murmured, his voice cutting through the silence of the room and making her shiver. His hand shot up to point her in the direction of Jess’ movie collection, and she got up, her knees suddenly feeling unsteady beneath her. She could feel his gaze still on her, and it made her stomach flutter with nervous excitement, her skin tingling under the weight of his attention as she hovered over the shelf, her fingers skimming through the movie titles. She couldn’t focus on any of them. The weight of the moment, of what was to come, pressed in on her, her mind racing with all the possibilities. Was it going to be tonight? He’d seemed panicked when she mentioned it before, when they were going back from the Fair, but surely, he’d thought about it too.

Guys like Daryl Dixon, Amy said over the phone that night when Beth told her about their first kiss, they don’t exactly take things slow, you know that, right? Most of the time, they’re all about keeping it rough and wild. I mean, Chris Mullaney definitely was.

Beth didn’t like her saying things like that about Daryl. It sounded like he was just some jerk looking for an easy hookup, and that’s not what it was. Daryl’s not Chris, that’s what Beth told her then. He’s different. And Amy giggled. Okay, sure, I’ll take your word for it. But, like, if you really want him, just make sure you’re ready, okay? I mean, you’re not even dating the guy, and you dry humped him. Jimmy couldn’t get you to do that for, what, six months?

Beth blushed, not exactly sure why those words resurfaced in her mind at that particular moment, but they lingered, replaying in her head as she stood frozen in front of the movies. It did seem more intense with Daryl since the very beginning. She would’ve never imagined thinking about sex on a first date with someone before. Was she moving too fast? Was this how he wanted it? And what if she was going to be bad at it? Beth had no idea what she was doing. Maybe she should’ve watched some videos on the Internet before deciding to sleep at his place…

Beth knew she wanted it, there was no denying that, but was she ready? Amy told her to make sure she was, but Beth didn’t really have the time to stop and consider it, too caught up in this thing between them. Too overwhelmed with all that Daryl was making her feel. When he was touching her, kissing her, the rest of the world hardly even mattered, and she only ever wanted more. Did that mean she was ready?

Her hands trembled as she grabbed a random movie, the edges of the box digging into her palms as she turned around to show him what she picked.

Daryl was leaning against the counter, watching her, his expression unreadable but his eyes darker than usual, the shadows of the room making him look even more intense.

“What about that one?” she asked, her voice trembling just enough to betray her nerves as she held the movie up.

The question made him move, his eyes dropping from her face, and as he made his way to her, two cups in one hand and a bowl of popcorn in the other, she wondered if it was easy for him, wanting her like this and knowing exactly what came next—how it would feel to give into it. Beth only knew what others told her about it, and it was both terrifying and exciting, thinking about doing this with him. About what it would all mean and feel like to have him be the only man to see her all naked and vulnerable like this, to have him show her all the ways in which one could pleasure another person.

Beth watched Daryl as he set everything up on the table next to their takeaway dinner, and then took the two remaining steps separating them from each other. Daryl’s gaze found her face again and stayed there for a few seconds, the look making her shiver slightly yet again. Then his eyes shifted to her hands. For a moment, he didn’t say anything, making her worry. Did she pick something silly? She eyed the back cover of the DVD, but before she could read through it, Daryl muttered, his voice low and rough:

“Yeah, that’ll do.”

He took the box out of her hands and moved to put the DVD in the player, and Beth gulped a huge breath of air before moving back to the couch.

Beth sat stiffly at first, her back straight and her dinner balanced precariously on her lap as she tried to focus on the movie. It was The Terminator from 1984. She remembered watching it with Shawn one day. She was never much of a fan of the series, but she supposed she wasn’t going to watch it too closely anyway—not with how distracted she’d been since the moment they got here.

Daryl sat down beside her, the space between them small enough that she could feel the heat radiating from his body, but not small enough for them to actually touch. He reached for his plate, and Beth swallowed audibly, the colorful images on the screen and the faint sound of dialogue barely registering in her mind. All she could focus on was Daryl sitting beside her. Daryl, who, to make matters even more frustrating, seemed completely at ease, leaning back against the couch and munching on his food. His eyes kept flicking between the screen and his plate, only once or twice straying to her face, making her blush furiously and avert her gaze every time.

“You ain’t eatin’,” he muttered after a long moment, their eyes meeting briefly. Beth gulped, her nerves getting the better of her.

“I am,” Beth protested softly, though it was clearly a lie. She speared a piece of mushroom on her fork and brought it to her mouth to chew nervously. When she chanced another glance at Daryl, he was still watching her, biting the inside of his cheek thoughtfully.

“What?”

He just shook his head, his attention slowly shifting back to the movie. As the room got quieter again, the only sounds coming from the TV screen, Beth leaned back into the couch next to Daryl and tried to relax a little. But no matter how much she tried, she couldn’t keep herself from sneaking glances at him—getting caught on the way his jaw moved when he chewed, the way his fingers hugged the fork and his arms flexed a little as he raised it to his mouth, the slight furrow in his brow as if he were concentrating on the film, and the way he licked the remaining grease from his lips. Her stomach fluttered again, though this time it wasn’t from nerves.

"You can pick somethin' else if this ain't your kinda thing," Daryl said suddenly, breaking the silence and gesturing toward the TV with his fork.

The heat rushed to her cheeks again. Did he realize she hadn’t even looked at what she picked—was she really that obvious?

“No, no… It’s fine. It’s… just, I’m a little distracted,” she said, stuffing her mouth with food to steal some time.

“Distracted by what?” he asked, and Beth choked on the noodles.

What do you think?! she wanted to shout—all nerves and frustration. These days, there was only one thing, one person making her distracted like this. Daryl must have known that. It seemed she was pretty obvious about it.

“Um, nothing. Just, nothing,” she said after a long moment, the words leaving her in a rush.

A silent grunt was his only response to that, and they spent another twenty minutes watching the movie in silence. She couldn’t quite stop the fidgeting, her body and mind too aware of him sitting next to her. Beth kept switching her position on the couch, pulling her legs up and down, her eyes wandering to his face every few moments, ignoring reason.

It was when she reached for the bowl of popcorn to stuff her mouth with something and leaned back again, bringing her legs up, her knees slowly bumping into each other a few times, led by the frantic energy inside her, that Daryl spoke again.

“Beth,” his voice stopped her, her knees short of bumping again. She chanced a glance at him and was met with one of his thoughtful looks. It always made her feel like he was able to see right into her soul every time he stared at her like that.

An electrifying wave of desire went through her, and she clasped her knees shut. His eyes flickered down to them momentarily, and then right back to her face as if burned. Beth watched him as he reached for the remote—none of them focusing on the movie anymore—and pressed pause. Then he leaned back next to her again and opened his arms, waving his fingers at her gently.

“Come here.”

Beth obeyed, her heartbeat pounding in her throat, unrelenting, as nerves twisted in her stomach. She shuffled on the couch, falling into his embrace easily, with her legs resting on the side of his and an arm embracing him around his middle. She rested her cheek on his shoulder, not sure how close he wanted her.

Daryl answered her insecurities just a moment later when he put his hand under her knees and flipped her legs around his lap, snuggling her even more tightly into himself. The action made her squeak, tension spilling out the moment he touched her. It made him stop, his body tensing, suddenly unsure.

“Want me to back off?” his voice was barely above a whisper, worried, when he spoke, and Beth shook her head quickly.

“No, don’t.”

She snuggled closer to him then, fighting her nerves to ensure that he knew she didn’t mind his actions. The last thing she wanted was for him to think that he did something wrong. She put her face in the crook of his neck, breathing him in, her heartbeat calming a little as she hugged him.

“What’s with the nerves?” he murmured softly, his breath ghosting over her hair, making her shiver slightly, both with want and tension.

She didn’t answer for a long moment, too ashamed of her own thoughts and insecurities. She had no idea why her nerves had chosen this moment to overwhelm her, but his closeness helped soothe them a little. The warmth radiating from his body seeped through their clothes, sending heat coursing through hers.

“I-um… I’m sorry,” she whispered finally against his skin. “Do you want to do something else? Maybe play something?”

“Play somethin’...,” he repeated after her, clearly surprised by the turn in conversation. Daryl didn’t pry though, instead letting her divert his attention. “Like what?”

She swallowed audibly, still nervous as she said silently:

“I’ve never…,” her voice broke a little, but she took a huge gulp of air and pushed through. “I’ve never shared a bed with a guy.”

Daryl was silent for a moment, and Beth focused on breathing, her chest rising and falling in sync with his as she listened to his heart beating just as fast as hers in his chest.

“That a game you told me about, yeah?” he asked at last, and Beth nodded against him. It seemed like most of their conversations ended with them telling each other about the things they either did or didn’t do, the things they wished they could do one day, so the game seemed more than fitting.

“Yeah, Never have I ever—that’s the one my friends were obsessed with last year, but I never played, ‘cause it was all about drinkin’ and all that.”

“Mhm, gotta get ourselves a drink then, right?” he asked, making her move a little back. He held onto her though when she went to move her legs off him, and instead of getting up to go and bring them some alcoholic beverage, he reached for the tea he made for them before. Beth smiled tentatively, taking one of the cups from him and watching him sip on his drink. “Sharin’ a bed with them smelly guys ain’t fun, didn’t miss out on nothin’.”

Beth giggled at the remark, realizing Daryl hadn’t connected her words to their situation at all. The way he said it, playful and unperturbed, eased some of her nervous energy.

“Your turn,” she said then, and Daryl grunted again, thinking.

“I’ve never sung in front of a big group of people,” he said finally, and Beth snorted.

“That one was too easy,” she accused him and was met with one of his little smirks.

“Yeah, better drink up, Greene.”

She did, heat spreading to her cheeks when his fingers started to play with the hem of her trousers near her ankles. Trying to focus and failing, she looked around the room, her eyes catching on his crossbow, perched on the wall next to the TV screen. She knew the weight of it now, the way it felt when you pushed the bolt out. It was the only weapon she’d ever held in her hands.

“I’ve never shot a gun before.”

Daryl nodded, taking a drink, his fingers shifting up on her leg almost absentmindedly, still playing with the material. Beth gulped for air, trying to ignore the way the lightest touch from him was setting her whole body on fire.

“Do you want to?” he asked her then, eyeing her curiously. “Could have some target practice, like we did with my crossbow.”

She never liked guns much. She didn’t know why, but the few times she had been around a fired gun—whether at celebrations or in the forest during hunting season—it left her struggling to breathe. Her body seemed to have an involuntary reaction, bringing tears to her eyes and making her feel panicky inside. Beth never told anyone about it, not wanting people to think she was a crybaby, but Daryl was quickly becoming her safe space. He was the kind of person she felt she could tell anything about herself.

“Yeah, maybe,” she said, unconvinced, then added carefully, “Guns make me a little… fidgety though. I don’t like the noise.”

Daryl nodded, no sign of amusement or irony in his features as he muttered,

“I get it. But it’s good to know how to handle one. Could show you that maybe. Then we keep practicin’ target shootin’ with my crossbow. No noise, just how you like it, yeah?”

Beth giggled at his playful tone, then nodded, an affectionate smile on her face and a different kind of warmth spreading through her at his consideration. He could be such a sweetheart.

“Sure. Your turn now, Mr. Dixon.”

He eyed her, a familiar mean glint in his eyes. It was all pretend, she knew. He didn’t call her out on calling him Mr. Dixon this time, though.

“I’ve never gone dancin’ to a club,” he said after a moment of stillness.

“You didn’t? Like, not even once?” Beth said, surprised, and Daryl shook his head in response. As she took another sip of her tea, he supplied quietly,

“Never really learned how to dance. Didn’t see any reason to.”

The light was playing with his features, making him look even softer than usual despite the roughness he often wore like armor, and Beth had a hard time focusing on anything else. She tilted her head, studying him for a moment before breaking into a gentle grin, her voice turning into a tease.

“What about dating? Taking your girl out dancing? That’s not reason enough?”

She knew he wasn’t much of a believer in love—not before—and that he’d never taken a girl to the Fair, but he surely went on dates. A guy like him had to have women throwing themselves at him all the time. Beth wasn’t blind; she saw the way some of the town folk eyed him at the Gala, and she knew she hadn’t imagined those looks.

“Ain’t it your turn?” he deflected, and Beth rolled her eyes before quipping,

“I’ve never gone hitchhiking.”

Daryl snorted.

“Drink up.”

“You didn’t? Really?” she asked incredulously, watching as Daryl smirked at her. There was something akin to disappointment in his eyes as he shook his head, though.

“Who’d give a guy like me a ride, huh?”

Beth smiled.

“I would,” she said with conviction, nudging him playfully with her foot and causing him to snort again. “I’m not joking. I would.”

“Yeah, but you know me,” he insisted, and when Beth started shaking her head again, ready to disagree, his stare on her face hardened. “And you better not tell me you’d do it before.”

“What if I would?” she challenged him, raising her chin in that cocky manner that always made him smile. It didn’t this time.

“Stupid, ‘s what it would be. Givin’ rides to guys like me ain’t safe.”

“Oh? And what’s so unsafe about it exactly?” Beth couldn’t help the blush creeping to her face as she said it, her voice catching on that strange note it often would when she spoke to him—all flirty, like she’d never been with anyone else.

“You know what,” Daryl murmured, either not noticing the shift in tone or not wanting to indulge her. She knew, of course she knew, but she wasn’t in the mood to keep it realistic and tame. The nervous energy she felt earlier was making her act out.

“I don’t. You’ll have to tell me,” she leaned in, bringing her chest closer to her bent knees as she teased him, her voice dropping to an almost whisper, “What would you do to me if I gave you a ride, Daryl Dixon?”

Beth bit her lip as she watched him dip his head slightly, the tips of his ears turning red and fingers twitching on her leg. He gazed at her through his hair again, his eyes dark and consuming her. When he spoke, it was with that rough edge to it that she loved.

“Why don’t ya keep playin’ your lil’ game, huh? Might be safer than askin’ dumb questions.”

They stared at each other for a long moment, the air between them suddenly dense and crackling with energy. She’d never been one of those adrenaline junkies, never really felt the need to push her luck before, but it was different with him. Everything was different with him. Beth just couldn’t help herself.

“And what if I don’t care for safe?” she uttered, holding her breath as she watched him take her in, his eyes flicking from hers down to her lips.

It had been almost two hours since they kissed the last time. Way too long, in Beth’s opinion. He should keep his lips on hers the whole time. That was the only acceptable way to exist, she decided.

Daryl leaned over her legs to put his cup on the table before answering her, and for a few seconds, she was convinced that he wasn’t going to do it with words. She could imagine him diving in, catching her lips and kissing her. Laying her down on that worn-out couch and doing to her all the things she’d been stressing about since they got here.

“Wanna know what I think?” he asked hoarsely, slanting back on the couch instead. Beth nodded, and he smirked at her. “I think you’re full of shit.”

Beth’s lips formed an ‘O’ as she stared at him, mockingly offended. The tension between them was still very much alive, but far less overwhelming due to his playful words. Daryl’s eyes were warm on her face. He was biting into the inside of his cheek while watching her with amusement and affection, and Beth was suddenly hit with a realization: no matter what Amy said about older guys, about guys like him, and no matter what had already happened between them, Daryl wasn’t going to put any moves on her. He wasn’t going to push her to do anything the way Jimmy did. If anything, it looked like she’d have to be the one doing the pushing.

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“Means I ain’t blind, girl. Talking the talk but squeaking like some damn mouse caught in a trap when I put my hands on ya,” he muttered, his hand traveling up her leg now, reaching her knee and stopping there, in between her legs. An involuntary shiver went through her body. Beth let out a small sound, as if to prove Daryl right, and his eyes snapped to hers. His Adam’s apple bobbed with a hard swallow, and the look he gave her made her squeeze her legs shut, the motion trapping his hand between her knees. Just like that, the air shifted again, but Daryl didn’t give her room to escalate it this time. “Just relax. Ain’t gonna do nothin’.”

“I know,” she said quickly, not wanting him to think she’d ever suspect him of going against her will. She wanted to tell him it wasn’t what she was worried about at all, but her voice got trapped in her throat as he went to move his hand again.

“We’re just playin’ some games, watchin’ movies. A nice lil’ sleepover like you said, alright?”

Daryl shifted his hand back down and to the front of her leg, apparently done proving his point, and Beth felt a pang of regret.

“Yeah, nice little sleepover,” she agreed, eyeing his hand and trying to gather her thoughts. What were they talking about before the hitchhiking?

“Alright, so… no backing down. You’ve never taken your girlfriends dancing?”

The rules of the game said nothing about asking questions, but Beth didn’t care. She wanted to know, game or not. This time, Daryl didn’t try to distract her, even though he looked quite uncomfortable when he shrugged and murmured,

“Never dated no one.” Beth gasped, and Daryl brought his hand to his jaw, his fingers sliding through his goatee as he considered her. “Not the way you think about datin’, I guess.”

“What do you mean?” Beth asked, taking a sip of her tea. She was proud of herself for not spitting it out a moment later when Daryl said, his voice low and hoarse:

“Had a few chicks here and there. Nothin’ regular. They were more into... other kinds of dancin’, y'know? Back seats, bathroom stalls, quick and rough.” He fell silent, turning his head away from her momentarily as if ashamed. Beth couldn’t take her eyes off him, even as her cheeks turned tomato red. His voice was even more hoarse as he admitted silently, “Nothin’ that ever meant somethin’.”

Images of a barely lit pub bathroom, his hands gripping a stranger’s hips, flashed unbidden in her mind. She shook the thought away quickly when the girl he pushed into the counter morphed into her. Then it was her legs falling open for him, pulling him in. Her panties pushed aside…

Beth exhaled, the nervous energy coming back twice as strong.

“You okay?” he asked, bringing his eyes back to her face, alerted by her gasp.

“Yeah, yeah, just…” Their eyes met, and she wondered if he could tell how hot and bothered he was making her feel with just a few words. “I’ve never had sex.”

“I already told ya,” he murmured, his eyes dark and unmoving on her face, his voice almost too soft. “You don’t have ta worry ‘bout it.”

It seemed like he was trying to convey something else entirely with those sentences, tell her something without really uttering the words, but Beth wasn’t brave enough to push him this time.

She bit her lip, all shy, glancing at her hands, clasped around the cup. She was suddenly pretty sure she’d given him the wrong idea entirely, acting as if she was scared of him touching her when she wanted nothing more than for him to do just that.

“No, I-uh, that’s not what I wanted to say.” She swallowed hard. “It’s just… It’s never been on my list, you know? Like, I’ve never actively thought or wanted to do that before… but with you, I… things feel different with you, and it’s all so new and exciting, and I think I’m…”

When Beth raised her eyes to him, he was still scrutinizing her, his lip caught between his teeth. I think I’m ready now, she was going to say, but the words felt both too big and too silly to utter like that. Daryl didn’t seem to get what she was trying to say, though, and Beth knew she should keep going. She wanted to explain to him that she wasn’t scared of him—could never be—but there were things she was scared of. Just a little.

She didn’t know how it felt, only that it could hurt the first time, and she was worried it wouldn’t be as great as it was in all her fantasies. But at the same time, she was unable to pace herself, to make herself wait much longer. A fire burned inside her, stronger every time they met. She didn’t want to seem too needy, didn’t want to come off as easy—not that he’d ever think that about her.

And then there was this other bit, the one that would make her blush furiously and stutter if she ever tried to voice it. Because she kind of wanted him to be rough with her, the way he sometimes was in her fantasies. But at the same time, she wished for it to be sweet and loving and beautiful. She wanted to be the girl he took to that dirty pub bathroom to have his way with, and also the girl he made love to under his bedsheets.

Beth wasn’t sure if it was possible to have both. She just felt full of contradictions that night, and not finding the right way to tell him all this without making a total fool out of herself, she shook her head, dropping her gaze to her hands again.

“Just forget it. I don’t—I don’t even know what I want to say.”

“Mhmm,” he grunted silently, and she shook her head again, trying to come up with something to say—anything to change the subject. She needed to get away from the storm inside her head. The sooner, the better.

Her eyes flicked to the screen, where Terminator was frozen mid-action, and she said, her mouth running ahead of her again:

“I’ve never killed anyone.”

Her heart jumped in her chest as the words hung awkwardly between them. She brought her eyes back to Daryl, only to find him still watching her, his hand frozen where it rested on her leg. His intense gaze sent a shiver through her, and she instantly regretted blurting it out.

“Not that I think you did,” she added quickly, the words tumbling over themselves. “That was just stupid. Sorry, I don’t know why I even said that. It’s not even my turn, right?”

Daryl’s expression didn’t change, but the way he dropped his gaze to his drink made her stomach twist. He didn’t reach for the cup sitting on the table, didn’t take a sip or even shift in his seat, but his mouth pressed into a thin, hard line. Beth knew that look too well—it was the kind of look that came right before he shut down, before he threw up walls so thick and high she couldn’t see over them.

She braced herself, expecting him to snap back with something sharp, to throw one of his classic that’s what you think of me?! retorts before storming out of the room. But he didn’t. He just sat there, motionless, staring into his hands like they held the answers to every bad thing he’d ever done.

The silence stretched, and with each passing second, Beth felt her nerves tighten. She shifted in her seat, fingers twisting around the mug in her lap as the air around them seemed to grow heavier.

“Daryl?” she ventured, her voice soft but trembling slightly. “I’m sorry, I can just—”

“It’s okay.”

His voice cut through hers, low and rough, and she froze. He nodded once, more to himself than to her, his face scrunching with discomfort.

“I get it,” he muttered, his words clipped and uneasy. “Lots of rumors out there, yeah? Things I did? People I hurt?”

The sigh that left him was long and heavy, like it had been trapped in his chest for years. He finally looked back up at her, and what she saw in his eyes sent a pang straight through her—pain, self-loathing. It hit her harder than she expected, and she realized just how much he’d been holding back around her lately.

It had been weeks since she last saw that look on his face—the one he wore every time he told her they shouldn’t be seeing each other, the one that came with all his arguments about why he wasn’t good enough for her, the one he had on the night he visited Rick’s place. Recently, he’d been different, lighter. Their time together had been full of teasing and laughter, and she’d started to think he’d finally let go of some of that guilt he carried.

But now? It was back, raw and unfiltered, and it left her heart aching.

“A lotta those are just bullshit,” he said finally, his voice tinged with bitterness. “People makin’ up stories, interpretin’ shit their own way, retellin’ the crap some other jackass did and puttin’ my name on it. ‘Cause why not?”

Beth reached out without thinking, her hand finding his where it rested on her knee. Her fingers squeezed his, firm and reassuring, and though his hand twitched under her touch, he didn’t pull away. That had to count for something, didn’t it?

“I’m so sorry,” she said, her voice filled with quiet sympathy. “I know it’s awful when people twist your life like that. You don’t deserve this.”

Daryl let her lace her fingers with his, his gaze flicking down to their joined hands for a moment. She saw the way his jaw tightened, as though he was fighting some inner battle, before his voice broke through the quiet.

“But not all of ‘em are lies, Beth.”

Her breath hitched as he said it, his voice low and hoarse, like the admission cost him more than she could ever understand.

“I been in shootouts,” he said after a pause, the words coming slowly and deliberately. “Pulled guns on people, got in fights… smuggled some shit for Merle more than once. Done a lotta things I ain’t proud of.”

Beth frowned, her brows knitting together as she searched his face.

“That’s not all you are,” she started gently, her words careful but firm. “Those things you did—”

But he didn’t let her finish.

“I killed the guy that shot Zach.”

Beth froze. She didn’t gasp or flinch—she couldn’t even breathe. The words hung heavy in the air, like a punch she hadn’t seen coming. When she finally managed to meet his eyes, her chest felt tight. Daryl was looking at her, his expression a mix of defiance and guilt, like he was daring her to judge him, already bracing for the worst.

“It wasn’t… I didn’t do it on purpose,” he went on, his voice rough, distant, like he wasn’t talking to her anymore but replaying the moment in his head. “He went to take another shot, wanted to put a bullet right between Zach’s eyes, and I just threw myself on him. Got into the fight and yanked the gun outta his hand. Pulled the trigger. Didn’t even know where I shot him at first. Happened so damn fast.”

His jaw clenched as he fell silent, his gaze slipping past her to something far away, something only he could see. The room felt colder suddenly, the quiet pressing in like a weight, and then Daryl spoke again, his voice a rough rumble:

“The guys he came with hauled him back to the car an’... Zach was bleedin’ out, so I got him outta there too, didn’t even think about that other guy. I only learned that bullet killed him a few days after, you know?”

Beth’s mind raced back to that night at Rick’s, to the way Daryl had looked—torn apart, hollow. She’d been watching him, drawn to him like a moth to a flame, while he was not only struggling with what happened to Zach, but probably also with shooting someone. A shiver ran through her at the thought, and Daryl must have noticed, because he pulled his hand away from her knee as if he’d been burned.

Without a word, he shoved her legs off his lap and stood, the abruptness making her flinch.

“Daryl,” she tried, not really knowing what she was going to say. I’m sorry didn’t seem like enough.

“Bet now you’re thinkin’, what are ya even doin’ here, right? Shoulda listened to Shawn, huh?” His voice was low, almost a growl, as he turned his back to her, closing off again, pushing her away before she got the chance to hurt him. “Ain’t got no business bein’ around someone like me.”

Beth’s chest ached as she watched him retreat to the kitchen, his shoulders tense, like he was trying to fold in on himself. She scrambled to her feet, her heart pounding.

“Daryl, just look at me,” she pleaded, her voice trembling but firm.

He stopped, his back still to her, before turning slowly. His movements weren’t the reluctant, defiant ones she expected—they were heavy, resigned. When she reached for his arms, he didn’t pull away.

He went willingly, turning to her almost as easily as he did when she tried doing it while he was drunk. This time, though, he didn’t start to shout at her.

Beth took his rough hands in hers, holding them up between them. She squeezed tightly, hoping to pour every ounce of care she felt for him into the gesture. Her voice was soft but unshakable as she said, “You did what you had to do. You protected Zach. That doesn’t make you a bad guy.”

Daryl’s mouth twitched—part scowl, part grimace—and he snorted softly, though it lacked any real humor.

“It don’t make it easier, knowin’ that,” he rasped, his voice rougher now, tinged with something raw. His eyes flicked down to their joined hands, and he shook his head. “I could’ve done it different. Could’ve busted his leg or knocked his teeth out instead. Maybe if I…”

“Maybe,” Beth interrupted gently, her thumbs brushing over his knuckles. “But maybe you wouldn’t be standing here today if you’d done that. And Daryl...” She swallowed hard, her throat tight with emotion. “I’d hate it if anything ever happened to you.”

Her words hit him like a blow—she could see it in the way his shoulders sagged, the way his gaze finally lifted to meet hers. His eyes were so full of tension and vulnerability, so full of him, that it stole her breath all over again.

For a moment, Beth thought about saying the words on the tip of her tongue, the ones her heart screamed to let out.

I love you.

But she didn’t. It felt too big, too soon, and she didn’t want this admission to forever be linked to this one awful thing he did. Instead, she held his hands tighter, hoping he could feel it in her touch, in her eyes.

Daryl stared at her, his throat working like he was trying to find the right words but couldn’t. She couldn’t stand him hurting himself like this.

“I can see it still weighs on you, even after all this time,” Beth said gently, her voice warm but steady. “It’s awful you had to go through it, Daryl, that it happened to you at all, and… it’s not your fault. It was an accident, right? You didn’t want to hurt anyone. You were just defending yourself.”

Daryl shifted uncomfortably, his eyes darting away from her as if the words were too much to bear.

“Yeah, well… I’m still that guy that killed someone. No changin’ that,” he muttered, his voice gruff but lacking the usual bite. He shifted away from her, avoiding her gaze.

Beth let out a shaky breath, her fingers curling into the fabric of his shirt, stopping him before he could turn away.

“Yeah, maybe, but you’re also that guy who protects people. You protected me. And Zach. Maybe we wouldn’t be alive if it wasn’t for you. And I think you’ve been trying to protect Carol too.”

His eyes snapped to hers at the mention of his friend, and she smiled at him, full of unspoken love and regret for all the bad things that had happened to him.

“And just today you protected those kids from being scammed. And my brother? He punched you, called you names, and you still protected him—from me. Or maybe you were protectin’ me from myself, from doing something I’d regret, I don’t know, but… all that? That’s what matters, Daryl.”

“Stop.”

“No, because you think I shouldn’t be here with you because of what you did, right? But, Daryl… what you did? What you keep doing every day for others—even when all they see is your mistakes, your past, or I don’t know… You keep going, helping people, even when they’re mean and so wrong about you. But I… I see you, Daryl Dixon.” Her voice softened, almost shy now. Daryl’s eyes flickered across her face, from her lips to her eyes, almost nervously, like he was afraid of what he might find there. “You’re a good man who had to make some hard decisions. Had some bad things happen to him. But I look at you, and I see you for who you are, okay? And I like what I see.”

“Beth…” he started, his voice low and uncertain, his usual gruff edge replaced with something softer, something raw.

Beth didn’t let go of his shirt, her fingers tightening just enough to keep him grounded. “I mean it, Daryl,” she whispered, her eyes locked on his. “You’re so much more than what you think of yourself. And no matter how many times you say it ain’t right or try to push me away, I’m not leaving, alright?”

Daryl stood there, frozen, as if he couldn’t believe what she was saying. His chest tightened—a mix of guilt and uncertainty—and she wondered if anyone had ever said this to him. If anyone had ever stayed. With Merle always leaving, his dad on some bender, his mom gone, and Uncle Jess living far away, she hoped Rick or Carol had given him that sense of security. But if they hadn’t, she was going to be the one to do it.

Daryl’s eyes darted between her gaze and her lips, like he was trying to find the courage to speak, but the words stuck in his throat. Beth’s heart pounded in her chest as she held onto him, refusing to let him pull away, refusing to let him shut down again.

She moved one of her hands up, caressing his neck gently, her thumb brushing over his jaw, while the other descended to catch his hand in hers again, grounding both of them in the quiet, heavy space between them. Her own insecurities and anxieties were long forgotten.

“I’m not leaving, Daryl,” she repeated, her voice soft but firm, filled with quiet desperation, like she needed him to believe it.

Daryl’s mouth opened, then closed again, a dry, strained breath leaving him as his hand flexed in hers. There was a long pause, the kind of silence that felt like it stretched forever. His jaw clenched, his chest tightening with some unspoken internal battle.

Beth’s breath hitched when Daryl’s hand lifted to her face, his fingers rough but gentle as he cupped her cheek, his eyes warm as they consumed her all over again.

“So what, you think you can fix me, huh?” he challenged, his voice rough and unsteady, just on the verge of igniting.

“There’s nothing to fix,” she whispered back, her nose bumping into his as she stood on her toes, bringing their faces as close as she could without kissing him. This time, it was his breath that hitched, a small sound escaping him and making her smile. “But I think I can make you happy.”

He swallowed audibly, his resolve breaking slowly as her lips grazed his, an offer and a wordless question.

“Yeah?”

Beth’s heart was in her throat again, but she didn’t falter.

“Yeah, we can make each other happy. Be real good for each other. You know?”

“Mhmm,” Daryl muttered, letting her brush her lips against his again, just a soft touch that left them both reeling. “Don’t know about that.”

“It’s okay. I do,” she whispered back.

Daryl swallowed again, nodding slightly, agreeing with her against all his insecurities. His hand on her cheek moved to cradle the back of her head, and the pressure between them intensified. The kiss they shared was still tentative, still careful.

And then, suddenly, it wasn’t.

Daryl’s hand tightened in her hair, pulling her closer, his body aligning with hers as the kiss grew more urgent, more desperate. She responded just as fiercely, her arms wrapping around him, pulling him in. The kiss deepened quickly, growing more heated with each passing second, fueled by all the raw emotions that had passed between them moments ago. Daryl’s hands moved down, gripping her waist, then sliding lower, cupping her ass and setting her skin on fire. His fingers dug into her as he lifted her effortlessly, causing her to let out a surprised gasp. She didn’t resist as he placed her gently on the kitchen counter, her legs naturally wrapping around his waist to keep herself steady.

Her whole body ignited. The similarity of this situation to the one she imagined him in with some stranger from a pub, maybe her alternate self, didn’t escape her. It was as if he read it from her mind, the way he stepped in between her legs, his hands catching her behind the knees and pulling her even more into him, leaving her defenseless.

Daryl’s breath was uneven as he rested his forehead against hers. He had her trapped between him and the counter, his hands holding her hips, keeping her close. It was one of the hottest things that had ever happened to her, but here he was still asking:

“This okay?” His voice was thick, still hoarse from the intensity of their kiss.

Beth’s chest rose and fell as she smiled softly, brushing a strand of hair from his forehead. Her heart was racing as she nodded and uttered, just as breathlessly as he had a moment ago:

“This is perfect, Daryl.”

Daryl exhaled a deep breath, nodding, his hands gently caressing her sides, then running up her back, pressing in between her shoulder blades. In turn, Beth’s fingers slid up his chest, feeling the hard muscles beneath his shirt and reveling in the way his breath hitched at the caress. She looked down, finding his heated gaze on her face as she pushed her hands to the back of his neck. Beth pulled him into another kiss. She could feel the tension in his body, the way his hands gripped her tighter as if trying to memorize the feel of her against him.

Daryl’s mouth moved over hers with hunger, his breath ragged, almost desperate. It matched hers. His fingers slid down her back, tracing the curve of her spine and making her shiver lightly.

For a moment, time seemed to stop. All that existed was the kiss, the warmth, the feeling of being completely and utterly connected to him. Her heart raced, his just as loud under her fingertips, and as Daryl moved to kiss her neck, her whole body shook under his strong, rugged hands, the sound of their labored breathing filling the space between them. His hands slid down to her hips again, lifting her slightly and pushing her even more into him, and Beth gasped, a silent moan escaping her as she felt him hard and heavy pressing into her thigh. Beth clung to him, her fingers finding purchase in his hair, pulling him even closer, struggling with the feeling of this not being close enough yet.

Daryl slid his hands under her shirt, his fingers grazing the skin of her back, another shiver running through her at the unsure touch of his. He pushed his fingers up and down her back a few times, each stroke a little more confident, his hand pressing into her skin more firmly. A moment later, when Beth pushed her own hands up his shirt, a small pleasurable sound escaped her as she thrust herself into his erection a little more firmly. The action seemed to make his hesitation evaporate completely. His hand moved to her front, first cradling her neck, then moving lower, grazing her bra-clad breasts, sliding lower to her tummy and then up again. Daryl’s fingers stopped their exploration under her breasts, skimming the edge of her bra almost questioningly as he pulled his head away from her neck after nibbling at it hard enough to pull another throaty moan out of her, and looked up at her. Beth captured his lips with hers, kissing him hard and deep, trying to convey that it was okay without needing to say it aloud. She gasped when she felt him cup her breast in his hand, his calloused fingers warm on her skin.

And then—bang!

The door to the apartment burst open with a loud creak, and Daryl froze, his lips tearing away from her. 

“Well, well, well…” Merle’s voice rang out, full of that familiar, loud, half-cocky tone. He stepped into the apartment with a grin plastered on his face, eyes widening as he took in the scene. “Ain’t this a sight for sore eyes?”

Notes:

Here comes Merle!

Just like you all wanted him to XD.

Chapter 24: I’ll leave you two lovebirds to your knittin’ circle

Summary:

It seems like Daryl and Beth just can’t catch a break from their brothers that night... or Merle catches them making out and decides to stir up some trouble.

Notes:

Here it is: Merle being Merle and Daryl's unhinged POV all wrapped into one chapter.
Funny enough, I originally wrote this chapter from Beth's POV, but during editing, I realized it just didn’t work that way. So, I re-wrote it from Daryl's POV. Guess when? YESTERDAY.
That’s right XD I haven’t been sleeping, trying to get this chapter just right for you all. I didn’t actually get anything else done today because I was busy editing this 'little' thing for you all haha
And I’m so so so happy with how it turned out that I just had to publish it today. So here you go!

***

Daryl pulled back quickly, straightening up, his jaw tightening as he eyed his brother, then glanced at Beth to see her adjusting herself on the counter, her cheeks flushed. She swallowed audibly, her head turning to Merle, who was looking between them with a smirk on his face and a playful glint in his eyes. Her hair was a mess, at least a dozen strands falling out of her ponytail. One strap of her rumpled t-shirt had slid down her shoulder, exposing a bit of her pink bra—the same bra he’d had his hand under just a few seconds ago. The skin of her neck glistened where he’d kissed her, a purple mark forming at the spot where he’d nibbled a little too hard.

The sight filled him with a tangled mess of guilt and arousal, and when he chanced a glance at her face and saw her red, swollen lips, the feelings only doubled. Giving in to this thing between them had turned out to be surprisingly easy, and it was becoming even easier with every kiss. Convincing himself that it didn’t make him the exact kind of creepy son of a bitch the whole town believed him to be? That was the hard part.

Twice in one day. Twice, he’d been reckless enough to get caught. Shame burned through him—not only because he’d literally forgotten his brother could come back at any moment, but because letting this desire consume him again so soon after his guilt-ridden confession wasn’t right. He’d just told her he took a life, for crying out loud. It was hardly an ideal moment to get horny, and he hated himself for it. But damn if he could stop the fire surging through him when she looked at him like that—with trust, with understanding, and with something softer he didn’t feel he deserved.
Nobody had ever looked at him like that, and as Daryl had found out over the last month, he was pathetically weak when it came to this particular look. Worse than weak, actually, because there was nothing innocent about the way it made him want to ravish her every time she acted that way towards him. All soft and affectionate. It was a glaring contrast to the almost animalistic desire it sparked in him. Between this and her cheeky moments, he wasn’t sure which turned him on more.

Beth sneaked a glance at him, and he turned his head away before their eyes could meet. He was pretty sure the tips of his ears were on fire, and his cheeks probably weren’t far behind. He must’ve looked like a mess too, his clothes rumpled and hair sticking in different directions, ruffled by her just a moment ago. He was breathing heavily, once again overwhelmed by the intensity of their kiss. What the hell was he thinking, telling her she had nothing to worry about—that it was just an innocent sleepover—only to go feral a few minutes later?

He wasn’t thinking. That was the problem. Those kisses weren’t just leaving him breathless; they were clouding his judgment, making him reckless and hot-headed. But he had to focus now. He had to handle his brother.

“Merle,” Daryl started, his voice a breathy, hoarse thing. He’d never paid any mind to it, never thought his voice to be anything special, but at some point, he became painfully aware of how Beth reacted to it. To the different tones and words he was using on her. He tried not to take note of it during their training, tried to ignore the way she would gasp or shiver at the sound of him, but it seemed that everything she did was registering in his brain whether he liked it or not. That’s how he knew now, after all those hours spent at their clearing, that if he only wanted to, he could turn her on just by talking in a particular way. Even now, he heard her, loud and clear in the room. The involuntary little sound that escaped her was silent as a whisper, but Daryl was too tuned into her to miss it.

When Daryl’s eyes snapped back to hers, Beth was already looking at him. Her stare was hot, heavy, and full of yearning, and Daryl almost groaned, his dick twitching in his pants at the sight she made. Desire overriding the guilt yet again.
She took a quick breath, looking back to Merle, and Daryl swallowed audibly, turning his eyes away as well, and trying to get himself under control.
Merle raised an eyebrow, stepping further into the room, his hands up in mock surrender as he giggled. “Ain’t this somethin’?” he drawled, his eyes finding Daryl’s as he came close enough to tap him on the shoulder. He eyed him up and down, amused as he quipped in: “Thought you said you weren’t gonna be messin' with her, brother.”

Beth gasped, and Daryl’s heart jumped in his chest. He should’ve told her that Merle suspected there was something between them before bringing her here. He knew. But it already cost him a lot to say all the other things to her, to try and be honest about his feelings with her. Talking about how his brother clocked him creeping over an eighteen-year-old wasn’t on his wish list, and it was simply too much. So he decided he would deal with collateral damage after. Daryl just didn’t take into account Merle catching them making out. He thought he could frame her being here as something less inappropriate, but here they were. Innocent movie night, my ass.

He cleared his throat and stepped away from Beth, creating a bit more space between them.

“Shut up, Merle,” he muttered, the words falling flat, with no better comeback coming to mind. He knew that’d be the first thought in anyone’s head if they found out about them—that he was just fooling around with her. But Merle’s jab still hit a nerve. The idea that he was only after one thing didn’t sit right with him, and before he could stop himself, he mumbled defensively, “Ain’t messin’ around.”

Merle just kept on smiling, clearly amused and unperturbed by the remark. He pulled a beer out of the fridge without a care in the world, and only betrayed his curiosity by short, quick glances he threw their way. Then Merle leaned back on the counter, opening his beer and taking a long gulp, his eyes catching on Beth’s worried gaze and sliding down, ogling her shamelessly. Daryl glared at him, but it only made Merle’s smirk widen.

Beth slid off the counter awkwardly, and Daryl eyed her, trying to discern if she felt ready to bolt yet. The heat she felt a moment ago was clearly replaced by nerves, that much he could tell.

“Nah, can’t blame ya,” Merle drawled next, and Daryl watched as the tips of Beth’s ears caught on fire under his gaze. She shuffled closer to Daryl, feeling uneasy, and even though Merle was scrutinizing them closely, ready to call him out on even the smallest thing, Daryl couldn’t just leave her like that. He reached out, his hand circling her back, fingers twisting into her shirt close to her waist, and as Beth glanced at him, meeting his reassuring gaze, Daryl decided it was worth all the teasing he’d have to endure. If she just kept looking at him like that, nothing Merle would say to him afterward mattered. Merle’s smile broadened as he traced their movements with his eyes, and Daryl chose to avoid looking at him directly, instead focusing on the floor. “Yeah, can’t blame ya at all. But what about you, sweet cheeks?”

Sweet cheeks. Nah, that won’t do. Merle could be obnoxious and rude to him all he wanted, but Daryl wasn’t going to stand here and listen to him use terms like that toward Beth.

“Merle,” Daryl started, a warning etched in his voice.

“What about me?” Beth interrupted him though, and Daryl’s eyes snapped to her. She looked a little out of her depth, a little unsure, but her voice sounded strong, defiant even, and Daryl felt warmth spreading through him.

“You gettin’ off on screwin’ around with mean old bikers, girlie?”

She blushed furiously, but she challenged Daryl’s older brother right back:

“Yeah, well, maybe I do. What’s it to you?”

Merle chuckled, his voice getting rougher and meaner now. It almost looked purposeful, and knowing Merle, it probably was. Talking shit to rile people up was his favorite pastime, and finding them like this was probably a goldmine of opportunity for him. Daryl could see it in the way Merle's grin widened, his eyes gleaming with malice.

“Could screw around with me instead, or is Zachie boy second in line, huh?”

Daryl clenched his teeth so hard, Beth could probably hear them click, if the look she shot him was any indicator. Daryl didn’t like where that conversation was going. Not at all. He was on the verge of telling Merle to fuck off and leave them be when Beth raised an eyebrow, a playful smirk tugging at the corner of her lips, even with her whole body vibrating from nerves, and said with conviction: “Nah, I think I’m good. Not my type, Merle. I like ‘em a little more…” she let her voice hang out there for a second, before she finished softly: “Daryl.”

She glanced up at him, her cheeks still warm, but her tone steady, daring Merle to push further. Daryl gazed right back at her, his face just as red as hers. What the hell did he do to deserve her looking at him like that? How on Earth did he end up with this beautiful angel pressed into his side, standing up to his brother like it was nothing? Daryl just couldn’t wrap his head around any of it — her wanting him in any way, being such a fierce woman underneath all that kindness or the way she spoke his name with soft tones, a warmth that couldn’t match anything else he’s ever heard.

He couldn’t fathom how she was still here, still looking at him like that, even after he’d told her about the worst thing he’d ever done. Most of all, he couldn’t get over the way just one soft word or one warm look from her could ignite his desire so fiercely it left him squirming. It was making him downright uncomfortable at the moment, knowing full well that Merle could see right through him.

Merle barked a laugh, and Daryl’s hand twitched at her side as he eyed his brother again.

“Ahh, hell, I like her, brother. She can stay.” He said, drinking to it, a different kind of smile appearing on his face, not as mean or ironic as the other ones. It made Daryl stop for a second. He didn’t even remember the last time his brother smiled like that. Must have been one hell of a party he’s been to before coming back here, some good stuff he took that made his mouth twitch like that. Still, Daryl didn’t like that tone, or the way Merle was still staring at Beth, trying to make her uncomfortable.

“Nobody asked your opinion,” he said gruffly, then pulled on Beth’s shirt lightly. Enough was enough. “Come on.”

Beth let him lead her to the couch again, his hand hovering over the small of her back, his fingers itching to touch her again. Insane, that’s what it was. He’s never even liked being touched by people, not to mention wanting to touch someone else, but the dam had broken when he kissed her at their clearing, and now all he wanted to do was be close to her. He tried fighting it, going even as far as not sparing her one look when he was picking her up. He tried, really tried to behave. But it was a struggle, especially since he was quite aware of this little astonishing fact: Beth wanted him to look, wanted him to touch her too.

She proved it yet again when they settled on the couch and she pushed herself into his side. When he all but froze instead of helping her get comfortable, Beth reached for his arm and pulled it up and around herself, ignoring his startled look. Daryl just kept still, his insides squeezing tightly at the thought of Merle watching them from his spot near the kitchen counter. He willed his own body to relax after a minute or two, sliding slightly back down the couch and embracing her a little more tightly in the process as he fought the jittery feeling, telling him to run instead.

Daryl turned on the movie again and brought his mouth to her hair, his heart pounding in his chest.

“Don’t mind him,” he murmured, warmth spreading through him as she snuggled herself into him even more in response.

He tried to ignore his brother as he made his way to them and dropped on the recliner from which he had the best view on both the TV and the couch, but his body betrayed him. He tensed up as if expecting a blow. No, not as if, he was actually expecting it. He could see Merle in his peripheral eye, sprawled back in the recliner. He was shaking his head with exaggerated disbelief as he scrutinized them. His brother was clearly curious about this and Daryl knew he would be, but it still made his skin itch uncomfortably. He’s never been openly affectionate with anyone, not like this, and he wasn’t planning on being this way in front of his brother, but Beth made that decision for him and Daryl wasn’t going to push her off. Against all reason, she decided to stick around, said she ain’t leaving no matter what, and although Daryl didn’t quite believe her, he wasn’t going to jeopardize this just because his brother made him feel uneasy. No, he was going to stick around as well, even if he had to suffer through Merle’s mean remarks and even if he felt like jumping out of his skin.

“Damn, little brother, I gotta say, never thought I’d see you all… cozy like that.” Merle could apparently read his mind as well. “You two gonna start knittin' next?”

His voice was mean and playful, but on Merle’s scale of antics, it could even be considered affectionate. Daryl shot him a withering look, but his voice had no bite to it when he answered: “Why? You wanna join our knittin’ circle?”

Beth giggled next to him, her eyes glued to the TV, and Daryl had to hold back a smile. He could admit to himself now that she was making him softer in a way he never thought he’d want to be, but showing it to Merle was another thing entirely. He felt like he was already laying his soul bare in front of his brother with how closely he was holding her against himself. No need to add to that by grinning like a madman just because he made her giggle.

“Knittin’ circle, huh? So, that’s what kids call it these days.” Merle snickered and Beth blushed at the implication, hiding her face in Daryl’s shoulder just a little. Daryl’s grip on her tightened too. He was well aware of how sheepish Merle could make someone feel with just a few words. Merle had a knack for saying the most seemingly harmless shit in a way that made people squirm. “And what about your daddy, girl? He knows where you’re at?”

Beth gasped, and Daryl clenched his jaw, fighting the grimace that threatened to surface. For over a month, he’d worked hard to avoid thinking about Hershel Greene or any other member of Beth’s family. Still, he could very easily picture their reactions to his connection with their daughter or sister. They were all going to be similar to what he already experienced with Shawn; he knew that even way before the Fair. Even before he let himself cross the line.

Meeting her, taking her out into the woods where nobody could stumble upon them, that was already going to create an outrage. But kissing her, getting involved with her, that was an offense he was probably going to pay for with his head the moment the lovely people of this town find out, the moment her dad catches on.

When he was alone with Beth, it was easier to forget about all that. Easier to pretend they were the last two people standing, that nobody else existed. At their clearing, it felt like the rest of the world faded away. There, he could ignore the weight of social rules and expectations, the pure hatred and disgust he’d face if anyone ever saw them together. All that mattered was her: the strange, unbearably pleasant feelings she stirred in him, her lovely smile, the warmth of her touch, and the teasing glint in her eyes.

Maybe that’s why it was so easy to give in. To let himself think, Damn, I don’t want this to end either, and just lean in, letting caution blow away like a leaf in the wind. After all, it was only them. Nobody else mattered; nobody had to know, right?

It was harder to pretend at the Fair, and he’d spent those two days before the date worrying about it. Obsessing about being with her in the open somewhere, being seen by others, judged by them for being at the Fair with someone so much younger than him. But then they got there, and Beth was so happy, smiling like he’d just given her the best present. Daryl found himself not really caring about other people anymore. What did he care for their looks when Beth Greene was looking at him like this? When she took his hand in hers and pulled him to the next fun activity after the next? When she laughed and blushed so beautifully, it made something foreign stir in his gut. Made him want to do stupid, cheesy shit they did in those romance movies she liked watching. Like a lovestruck fool. Like it was a damned romance novel after all.

He still had those annoying impulses, those nagging thoughts telling him to pull away, to drop her hand, to put some distance between them, but he put up a fight with them. Tried not to think about all those people around them and focused on her entirely, just like he did at the clearing. He was managing quite well before Shawn appeared, not even flinching back when Beth kissed him in the middle of the crowded Fair, consequences be damned.

He actually let himself think that maybe it could somehow, strangely, impossibly work. That they would be good. He should have listened to his intuition instead, should have known that no place is far away enough to be safe to be with her like this.

Maybe that’s because you shouldn’t be with her at all, some mean part of his brain supplied, but Daryl ignored it. Yeah, he definitely shouldn’t, but she wanted it for some God-forsaken reason, and he wasn’t strong enough to oppose it any longer. Not when it made him feel truly, completely alive and happy for the first time in his life.

“Lay off her, Merle,” Daryl spoke before Beth could find her own words, his voice firm and rough. Then he addressed her, his voice softening against his will and his breath ghosting on her hair. He wasn’t sure how he managed to sound so collected, but he was glad he did. It was almost as if he wasn’t falling apart at the seams, being subjected to Merle’s unrelenting gaze, knowing full well how it all looked to him. Like he was the kind of asshole, this specific flavor of creep, who liked them young and untouched. “Don’t worry, he ain’t tellin’ nobody. Right, Merle?”

Merle held up his hand in mock defeat, a grin spreading across his face as he eyed Beth. “Yeah, no, dear ol’ Merle ain’t sayin’ a word to nobody. Mum’s the word, baby girl.”

“Stop callin’ her those names,” Daryl snapped, a warning obvious in his tone. Merle didn’t stop to consider it, though, instead sending Daryl a mean look.

“What? Like she ain’t a baby? Barely outta high school.” Merle teased, and Daryl’s breath hitched for all the wrong reasons, his gut twisting uncomfortably. “Damn. Never knew that’s how you liked ‘em.”

He didn’t need Merle’s teasing. He already knew all the reasons why he shouldn’t be doing this. Daryl went through the list of them every single day before meeting her at the clearing, talking himself into acting like a goddamned adult here, into ignoring all her little cues, all the signs of her affection and desire. She was laying them in front of him so openly, not realizing that every hitch of her breath, every shiver and gasp she made, was pulling him even more in.

Perhaps Daryl didn’t know much about relationships or women in general, but after all this time, he could tell when she was flirting with him, her eyes glinting mischievously and cheeks reddening under his gaze. She was both cheeky and shy about it at the same time, the mix that had him weak in the knees. And although he did everything in his power not to look, he simply couldn’t not notice how her shorts were becoming shorter, the tops more revealing as the summer progressed. Learning the soft curves of her body, the feel of her skin under his fingertips when he manhandled her during their sparring matches, the warmth of her thighs when she wrapped them around him to shove him off—it was a different kind of torture altogether, one he couldn’t escape no matter how hard he tried.

He still tried, though. Told himself the girl didn’t know what she was doing, that he shouldn’t be taking advantage of this little crush she had on him. And perhaps he could even succeed in this, never give in, if it was just about messing around like Merle said, if she didn’t pull at his heartstrings at the same time. If those hours spent with her didn’t become his favorite moments in any day. If he didn’t find himself looking forward to seeing her, not because he wanted to put his hands on her, but because he simply wanted to watch her smile again, no matter how awfully cheesy it sounded. If he didn’t find himself grinning stupidly at the thought of something she’d said an hour, a day, or even a week earlier. If the little rumblings she subjected him to on their way to and from the clearing weren’t making his heart swell uncomfortably. And more than anything, perhaps if she didn’t look at him with all that warmth and affection, like he was the best damn thing that happened to her, perhaps then he could succeed.

So yeah, he knew all the reasons why he shouldn’t be doing this like the back of his hand. But he was like a moth, drawn to her light, to the coziness it offered, and even if it killed him in the end, he wouldn’t be able to stop himself from reaching for it. Not when it definitely was the best damn thing that ever happened to him.

“Didn’t you say you couldn’t blame him a moment ago?” This time, Beth was quicker in answering Merle. She turned her face in Merle’s direction again. Her cheeks were on fire, but the look she had in her eyes was nowhere near as bashful as before.

“Oh, but I did. Wanna know why?” Merle wiggled his eyebrows at her, leaning forward slightly, his voice dropping as if he was sharing some kind of secret with her. “’Cause the way you look at him, darlin’, it’s damn near sinful. Ain’t no man alive strong enough to resist a look like that.”

It was Beth’s time to go still, mortification clear on her face. She wasn’t the only one squirming in her seat, though. Daryl made a sound at the back of his throat, his eyes falling shut for a second or two as he begged some higher being to give him strength. It’s been only a few minutes, and he was already done with his brother.

“Told ya to lay off her,” he muttered, and Merle snorted.

“Told me many things. Like, how you don’t have a thing for blondie here.” Daryl pressed his lips together, the truth behind Merle’s words hitting him square on the chest. He just kept going against his own words when it came to Beth. Over and over again. There was no denying that, so Daryl stayed silent, and Merle used this as an opportunity to continue his game. To Daryl’s displeasure, though, he directed his next words at Beth. “Funny, how he still ended up with his tongue down your throat, huh? Must’ve been givin’ him that look of yours a lil’ too often.”

Beth was silent, as stunned as Daryl, her gaze not leaving Merle’s face. Merle leaned back, his deep laugh rumbling in his chest, his body shaking with it. But then, as quickly as it had come, his amusement sobered, and he threw his hand in Beth’s direction. The can of beer he held sloshed slightly, the sound a sharp contrast to the thick tension in the room.

“But hey, look, wouldn’t want to see my brother gettin’ in trouble now, would I? So tell me, lil’ birdie,” A smirk was tugging at the corner of his mouth, but there was a certain determination in Merle’s eyes that alarmed Daryl. He wasn’t just saying shit for the sake of it, Daryl realized. This here was Merle on a mission, and for Daryl, it usually meant problems. “You sure you ain’t gonna go runnin’ to Daddy when things go south?”

Beth blinked at Merle, clearly caught off guard by the sudden shift in direction. But instead of shrinking back, she held her ground. Her lips pressed together, her expression thoughtful, as if Merle’s jab hadn’t even phased her.

“No, why would I?” she questioned, glancing at Daryl briefly as if summoned by his eyes on her face. There was something reassuring in her look, in the way she sneaked her hand to his knee a moment later and squeezed lightly, as if she wanted to say that it was okay.

“I dunno, all sorts of reasons out there. For one, don’t let that scruffy mug fool ya, you know. Daryl ain’t as young as he looks, girl. You sure that ain’t a problem for ya?”

“Look, I don’t know what you’re trying to prove here, but I’m not some kid,” she said, her tone surprisingly firm and steady. “And if you really need to know, my Dad’s fifteen years older than my Mom, and they’ve been happy as can be. So, I don’t see age mattering much.”

Merle let out a low whistle, clearly amused, but there was something else in his expression — a reluctant respect, maybe.

Fifteen years — that was an even bigger difference than between him and Beth, but Daryl didn’t kid himself into thinking it would make things any easier with her parents. He was still a Dixon, and his family’s legacy made him even more undeserving of her than his age did. Still, having her speak about this with such ease made the string of nerves inside him ease up a little. It didn’t make Merle back down, though.

“Guess you like keepin’ it all in the family tradition, huh?” Merle’s grin widened as he uttered another teasing remark: “What next? Gonna try and turn my brother into one of ‘em lame, church-going, apron-wearin’ househusbands?”

Beth’s face flushed, her lips parting slightly in surprise as she inhaled sharply, her body stiffening against him. Daryl felt her reaction even before she had the chance to mask it. That one made her upset, that much was clear. He couldn’t tell exactly what part of the remark hit her hardest — Merle’s mocking tone, the insinuation that she wanted to change him, or the disregard for her family’s way of life. Either way, she wasn’t happy.

“That’s your plan, sweetheart? ‘Cause you know what they say, can’t really teach an old dog new tricks.”

Beth’s face deepened in color, her lips pressing together, but she didn’t break her stare. Daryl noticed her pulse quickening at the base of her neck, and he tightened his grip on her, a protective instinct stirring inside him. He decided enough was enough.

“Y’know, Merle, you don’t gotta say everything that comes into your head.” His tone was low and dry, but there was an edge of frustration that made it clear he didn’t like where this was going or how Merle was addressing her. “Shuttin’ up could save you some teeth.”

“Or a shiner like yours?” Merle shot right back as if he was just waiting for the opportunity to question it. He let the jab sink before asking: “What happened there, huh?”

Daryl’s jaw clenched, and his shoulders tensed again. He could feel the weight of Merle’s eyes on him, but he wasn’t about to get into it.

“Nothin’ happened. Had a lil’ disagreement with someone, ‘s all.”

Merle didn’t seem convinced. He raised an eyebrow at him and questioned:

“Lemme guess, someone didn’t like you gettin’ cozy with farmer's daughter?”

“Ain’t none of your business. Already handled it, didn’t I?” His voice was sharp, his patience thinning by the second.

Merle chuckled, clearly enjoying himself, and Daryl’s glare sharpened, his lips pressing into a tight line. He could feel Beth shifting slightly beside him, her hand gently sliding up his leg and down slightly as if trying to silently soothe him. Merle caught the movement, his grin turning even more smug.

“Relax, little brother. I’m just lookin’ out for ya, and your girl too, you know?” Merle tipped his beer at Beth, a smug tilt to his head, and Daryl’s heart did a strange little flip. His girl, Merle said. It wasn’t annoyance this time that flared up in Daryl, but something much warmer, and for a moment, he didn’t care about Merle’s teasing as he eyed Beth at his side. “Makin’ sure you both know what you’re gettin’ yourself into and all that.”

Merle waved his hand dismissively, taking another long gulp out of his beer and burping loudly. It seemed to be on purpose too, seeing as he glanced at Beth right after as if anticipating her reaction. She didn’t react, but Daryl let out a breath and spoke, his voice softer but still edged with that familiar frustration for his brother.

“Jesus, Merle, don’t ya got somethin’ better to do?”

“Fine, fine.” Merle raised his hands in mock surrender, tossing the empty beer can through the whole room and in the vague direction of the trash with a clink, the way Daryl did when he was drunk. Daryl pressed his mouth into a thin line but didn’t comment, trying not to think about Beth sitting next to him. Probably wondering if he’s just as rotten at the core as his brother. It really astonished Daryl that she wasn’t running away from him yet.

“I’ll leave you two lovebirds to your knittin’ circle. Just don’t go makin’ snot-nosed brats while I’m gone.” With that, Merle sauntered out of the room, his laughter trailing behind him. Daryl sighed, letting his head fall back to the headrest. Finally.

When, a moment later, he raised his head again, Daryl caught the small smile on Beth’s lips, her eyes flicking up to him, and he felt his face heat up. He tried to look away, but there was something in the way she was watching him — something warm — that made it hard to avert his eyes.

"You okay?" she asked, her voice soft, the quiet of the room broken only by the faint sound of the movie they’d long since forgotten.

“Yeah, just Merle being Merle, you know? Sorry about him,” he said, keeping his voice low and careful. “Don’t listen to half the crap he says.”

He hadn’t even been aware he started playing with the material of his jeans, fidgeting, before Beth smiled and clasped her own hand around his, stopping the motion. Her face was close, and her eyes soft and reassuring, which made the tightness in his chest ease just a little.

“It’s okay, I wasn’t plannin’ on it,” she said, her voice a little teasing as she snuggled back against him, her head resting on his shoulder like it had before. “But, he’s not that bad.”

Daryl frowned, glancing down at her, not sure if he heard her right.

“You think?”

“Yeah, I mean, I think he’s kinda funny... when he’s not tryin’ to make you wanna crawl in a hole and hide.” Beth smiled up at him when he snorted in response. Funny wasn’t the word he would’ve used. Merle was usually annoying the hell out of him, and there was nothing funny about that. Even now, he was set on embarrassing them both, making them squirm in their seats. But Daryl supposed that’s what older brothers were for — embarrassing the hell out of you.

“I guess he’s got his moments,” Daryl admitted finally, his voice low and rough.

“Yeah, and all that teasing,” Beth added thoughtfully, “don’t you think it’s just his way of making sure you’re alright, without actually havin’ to say it? Like he doesn’t wanna admit it, but he’s lookin’ out for you. Making sure I don’t get you in trouble.”

Daryl only grunted in response, not knowing what to say to that sentiment. He knew what she meant, even if he wasn’t sure how to express it. Merle wasn’t the type for sappy talks, but Daryl had been around long enough to know that his brother’s jabs came with a twisted kind of concern. It wasn’t easy for Merle to show it, but it was there, buried beneath all the crap he threw at people. It didn’t make him less annoying, though.

Beth shifted, and the question she asked next caught him off guard.

“You told him then?” she asked, her voice hesitant but curious. “About… you know? Liking me?”

Daryl exhaled a slow breath, his body tense again. He’d expected this question sooner or later, but still, hearing it out loud made him uneasy. She sounded a bit unsure of herself too, as if she still didn’t quite believe Daryl liked her, even though he thought he made it glaringly obvious.

“I didn’t,” his voice dropped low, barely above a murmur. “He—um, he can be one perceptive bastard when he wants to, you know? Kinda ambushed me about it one time, told me he could see somethin’ was goin’ on.”

Beth nodded against him.

“And you told him it wasn’t like that, that nothing was going to happen between us.” It wasn’t a question. Merle basically confirmed this with his antics. Calling Daryl out on going against his words. Daryl’s chest tightened again, but he still answered her.

“Yeah, not sure who I wanted to convince more, him or myself.”

The admission was silent, full of guilt, but Beth smiled against him, clearly satisfied with this response.

“When was it?” she asked, a soft curiosity in her voice as she raised her head to look at him. The question made him swallow hard, and he felt the heat in her gaze, the way her eyes searched his. He couldn’t help it — he raised his hand to her cheek, brushing his thumb gently across her skin, the flickering light from the TV casting shadows on her face. He didn’t answer her this time, so she repeated herself, nuzzling her face into his hand for good measure. “When was it, Daryl?”

“A while ago,” he murmured, his voice quiet and tender. His thumb traced the curve of her cheek, and Daryl’s heart felt like it was beating just a little faster now.

Beth smiled softly, her hand lifting to his chest, feeling the rhythm of his heart beneath her palm. He knew what she was going to do even before she started closing the distance between them. Could see it in her eyes, his own desire reflected at him in a way that made it almost unbearable. Merle was right about one thing at least. There was no way he could survive her looking at him like that. No way he could resist flying too close to the sun when it was pulling him in like that, so warm and pleasant.

Beth leaned in finally, their breaths mingling as the tension between them crackled like a live wire. Daryl found it truly addictive, the way the air between them seemed to change whenever she got this close. She didn’t even have to do much, just exist in his vicinity, and Daryl was a goner.

His nose brushed her skin, and he couldn’t help himself — he nuzzled into her, breathing her in deeply. Her scent surrounded him, soft and warm, like her. The sweetness of her perfume and shampoo mingled with the subtle, natural scent of her skin, and it made his head spin. He couldn’t get enough of it, couldn’t stop himself even if he wanted to, which he sure as hell didn’t.

It was bordering on obsessive, the way he felt about her. Every time she was this close, he’d catch himself lingering, hoping she wouldn’t notice how long he stayed there, how much he was taking in. It felt like he was trying to carve her into his memory with every inhale, and damn if that wasn’t dangerous.

His eyes flicked downward, catching the movement of her lips as she wet them. They were so close he could feel the faintest hint of their heat, could almost swear he tasted the faint sweetness of her lips on his tongue even though they hadn’t kissed yet.

Daryl’s breath hitched when she tilted her head into his touch, her skin soft under the calloused pads of his fingers as he cradled her face, and her eyes half-lidded but fixed on him. There was a slight flush blooming across her cheeks, a warmth that spread from her skin to his palm, and he was sure it wasn’t just from the glow of the TV.

Beth was so beautiful, it hurt to look at her sometimes, and Daryl was slowly realizing there wasn’t any part of her he wasn’t fixated on. It terrified him just as much as it thrilled him.

She leaned just a little closer, her lips brushing against his, the moment stretching, the tension almost driving him insane. He made a strangled sound at the back of his throat when she finally captured his lips in a slow, tender kiss. The warmth between them was palpable, the kiss deep and full of longing, but also so much more than that. Kissing her felt like nothing he’d ever experienced before, and being able to do it now, after over a month of denying himself, was both freeing and overwhelming. All those feelings he bottled inside himself suddenly wanted an out, and it was hard to stop himself from letting it all go.

All the awkwardness and uneasiness created by Merle was gone seconds after their lips met, replaced by the heat. She slid her legs around his lap, the way she did back when she kissed him for the first time, but unlike that first time, Daryl didn’t hesitate in putting his hands on her. His body acting as if on instinct, wrapping around her and pulling her in closer. He helped her settle herself on top of him, then ran one of his hands up her back, his fingers tangling in her hair as he angled her head, deepening the kiss, chasing her tongue with his.

For a while, there was nothing in his head but static; all his thoughts, all reason went out the window as desire took the reins again. He ran his hands through her body, exploring her curves again, her thighs clasped around his legs, her round ass, small waist, the dip of her hips that he gripped tightly, hiking his other hand up to her head again, as he flipped them to the side and down into the soft cushions of the couch.

The noise that escaped her this time was nothing like the nervous little squick she made when he pulled her legs over his a few hours back. Instead, it was a soft, breathless noise, the kind of sound that made his chest tighten with a mix of desire and tenderness. Her warmth enveloped him as their bodies slotted together, her legs sliding over his in the sweetest torture, pulling him even closer.

Daryl was barely even aware of his surroundings. Everything in the world seemed to fade away as he kissed her with reckless abandon. He was aware of her hand in his hair, her fingers massaging his scalp, of her other hand sneaking under his shirt to slide up his chest, cradle his neck, and move to his shoulders next, and of the sweet way in which she was pressed against him. But not much more than that.

Perhaps that’s why it rattled him so much when a very distinct sound akin to machine gun fire cut through the room. Daryl flinched back, his heart in his throat as his eyes landed on Beth’s widened irises. She seemed just as caught up as he felt, breathing heavily, her cheeks red and lips swollen.

Merle’s snoring cut through the silence again, and Daryl breathed out a sigh of relief at locating the source of the noise. It seemed to put Beth at ease as well. Her eyes sparkled with amusement as she whispered, her voice changed from emotions. “Guess he’s providing the soundtrack for tonight.”

Merle’s snoring ramped up as if on cue, this time sounding more like some mangled beast than a man, and Beth giggled, her eyes bright and full of joy as she looked up at Daryl.

Daryl huffed out a low, breathy chuckle of his own, shaking his head slightly.

“Yeah, well, it’s him or another movie you ain’t gonna pay attention to anyway,” he murmured playfully, his head dropping to her shoulder, then raising to the crook of her neck to chase her scent again.

Beth’s soft laugh bubbled up at his remark. “Hey, you don’t know that!” she argued, but angled her head amiably to the side, giving him even more access to her skin.

“Mhm,” he hummed against her neck, before placing a light kiss on her skin. She shivered against him, her body arching and hands pressing between his shoulder blades with desperation. Daryl pressed his lips into the same spot again, this time more firmly, then smiled against her skin as he murmured, “Why don’t we put somethin’ else on then? See if it holds your attention.”

He started to pull back then, but Beth’s hands slid up around his shoulders, her legs bracketing his hips to keep him in place, her grip insistent. Daryl couldn’t stop the quiet laugh that escaped him at her determination.

“Y’know,” he said, his voice teasing, “ain’t never had a movie night sleepover or nothin’, but pretty sure watchin’ the movies is part of it.”

“Really? That’s not what I heard, Daryl,” she countered, her voice seemingly innocent even as she slid her hands down his back provocatively. Daryl snorted a laugh, which turned into a silent groan when she pressed him even more snugly into herself, his cock pushing against her mound. Beth moaned silently, but it didn’t deter her from telling him what exactly she heard. She turned her head to him, her breath hot on his ear as she whispered to him, “All my girlfriends always said it ain’t really a movie night if you don’t fool around a little.”

Daryl’s head snapped up, eyes narrowing at her playfully even as he fought to keep his composure. She was biting her lip, her cheeks red and face flushed as she gazed up at him, no trace of the nerves that were eating at her right after they arrived at his place. She looked completely at ease now, trapped under him.

“Oh, so that little kitchen detour earlier ain’t foolin’ around in your eyes? Well, hell, good to know,” he teased, a smirk tugging at the corner of his mouth. She giggled, shaking her head.

“No, I mean, yeah, but no harm in doin’ it again, right?” Beth smiled up at him in the most innocent way, even as she dragged her fingers up his chest, goosebumps raising on his skin in the wake of her touch.

Well, there was some harm, alright. He wasn’t sure if he could survive more of this. Not tonight, not with how strong, how unrelenting his feelings for her were. Everything seemed more intense when she was involved, and the day had already been one hell of a rollercoaster. He felt overstimulated already, tired of high adrenaline and emotions, and it seemed to start wearing her down too — she tried to keep her little yawn in, but he clocked it all the same.

“Sure, ain’t nothin’ hotter than makin’ out to the sounds of Fred Flintstone over there.” His voice dropped into a dry drawl as he gestured with his chin toward his brother’s room. He knew he sounded mean, but Beth laughed at his quip, so he added, his eyes tracing the lines of her face. “You think he’s takin’ requests? Wouldn’t mind the rumble of a bike for a background.”

Beth’s laugh bubbled out of her again, light and carefree, and Daryl couldn’t help the way his chest warmed at the sound. She yawned openly this time, the back of her hand covering her mouth, and before she could protest, Daryl lowered himself down and to the side, taking her with him so that they were facing each other, still snuggled close with his back pressed into the headrest. Beth cuddled into him, a soft, content sigh escaping her, before she giggled again and mussed, her voice soft and content and her hot breath ghosting over his collarbones:

“I bet that’s how you sound when you snore, like some Harley or somethin’.”

“I don’t snore,” he protested quietly, then decided to tease her back. “Bet you sound like a damn cat purrin’ in your sleep, huh? All soft and sweet?”

She nuzzled into him even more, and it struck Daryl again how comfortable he was, how good it felt to have her pressed like this against himself. It was too good to not close his eyes for a moment, letting his nose fall into her hair, breathing her in again.

“Mhm, wouldn’t you want to know?” He would. Goddammit. He wanted to learn all the sounds she made by heart. “You can find out, you know, if you keep asking me out on sleepovers.”

Her voice became sleepy, but she somehow managed to tease him for the next hour or so, laughing at his gruff, mean responses as if they were the best jokes she’d ever heard. He was pretty sure they woke up Merle at some point too, laughing at something stupid he didn't remember the day after. It was sometime after three in the morning when Daryl realized the day had finally taken its toll on her. As her body relaxed further into him, he felt her breathing slowly even out, her head nestled against his chest. Daryl’s arms tightened around her as he pulled her even closer, feeling her soft warmth against him, and telling himself that he’d just lie with her for a few more minutes before carrying her to the bed. That old couch was hardly good enough to sleep on, he knew. Letting himself relax turned out to be a mistake though. He wasn’t even sure when he drifted off, the last thing he heard being the soft hum of her breathing and the distant soundtrack of Merle’s snoring.

Chapter 25: You meant that in a sexy way, right?

Summary:

Beth tries not to get caught. Merle is being a little shit. Daryl tries and fails to act responsibly.
Or...
Things are getting heated between Daryl and Beth.

Notes:

Okay, admission time at the end of the chapter because it's also a little spoiler—and I wouldn't want to do that to you xD.
One thing though: that chapter is really long. Like, really awfully long. I actually thought about turning it into two chapters, but I would have to cut it right in the middle of... Well, you'll see. Anyway, I hope you like it <3 *fingers crossed*

Also, I’m sorry I'm not adding as many chapters now as I did before. My laptop broke, had to get a new one (is this the famous AO3 curse getting me? XDD), and then things just kept piling up. So, I guess we're back to one chapter a week until I get my life under control.

***

The following morning, Beth didn’t wake up on Daryl’s couch, nor in his arms the way she dreamed of, but in his truck. They were parked on the side of the road, just one turn from Greene’s farm, and when she woke up, it was to the quiet tunes of Daryl’s radio and his eyes on her. He turned away quickly, the tips of his ears catching fire at being caught watching her sleep, and Beth smiled softly. She couldn’t help but feel a pang of disappointment, though—she wanted to know how it felt to start the day in his warm embrace. She figured she had to be really tired not to wake up when he was hauling her ass to the car. But who could’ve blamed her after the day they had?

“You should’ve woken me up,” she told him, her voice barely above a whisper, all cranky from sleep.

Daryl only grunted in response, not in the mood to explain his actions apparently, which was expected after the rollercoaster of their night. It was probably another first for him: trying to talk through his emotions, explain himself, be open and vulnerable like this. Beth thought he’d probably go back to being a bit more closed off now, shying away from having it all out in the open again, but that was all right with her. She loved him just the way he was, even if him shutting her out could be frustrating at times.

“You know, so that you wouldn’t have to go through all the trouble of carrying me to the car?” she continued softly.

“Ain’t no trouble,” he replied, eyeing her again, a bit more assured now that she didn’t call him out on watching her sleep. “I was gonna wake you up in a minute, have you go...”

“Uh-huh, already antsy to get rid of me, Mr. Dixon?” she teased him.

Daryl snorted. “Antsy to get outta here before anyone else sees us together. Ain’t like we’ve been all that careful last night.” He was biting into the inside of his lip, and his voice sounded gruff and grumpy, but the way he looked at her while saying it told a different story, his eyes all warm, glinting playfully as he added, “Some damn secret.”

Beth giggled, then leaned her head back against the seat, watching him, the rising sun playing with his features. She could stare at him for hours and never get bored, too happy to look for the things she missed before—a mole here, a freckle there, small marks that somehow made him even more him. His hair, unkempt and wild, fell around his face like it had a mind of its own, and Beth barely held herself back from running her hands through it.

She noticed the way his eyelashes caught the light, darker at the base and tipped with gold where the sun kissed them. The sharp line of his jaw, dusted with just enough stubble to leave her skin burnt every time they kissed. She loved the curve of his lips, now tilted slightly in something between a scowl and a smile. They looked chapped, but there was nothing rough in the way he kissed her the night before—tender and passionate. Beth felt goosebumps break out on her skin at the mere thought of it.

Beth's gaze drifted to his hands, resting on the steering wheel. She couldn’t help but smile, remembering how those same hands had cupped her face, warm and steady, when he kissed her. She brought her eyes higher, and her cheeks warmed at another memory of the night before, of the way his arms had wrapped around her, maneuvering her as he pleased with no effort but with a kind of gentleness almost nobody would suspect him of. It broke her heart that so many people didn’t see him for who he really was, that for so many, he was just some coarse, unrefined guy.

Beth found herself hoping they wouldn’t have to keep it a secret for long, that at some point she’d be able to disclose to just about anyone how much she adored every piece of him. That she’d be able to show them all how wrong they were. Maybe at some point, they’d find a way to make it into an official relationship without starting a war, Beth thought. Maybe once she started college, things would be different. Her parents wouldn’t be happy about it at first, she knew, but she also believed that they would warm up to the idea once they really got to know Daryl.

For now, though, it already seemed like a lot—having two people know about it. She was surprised Daryl allowed it—for Merle to find them like that—but she didn’t feel bad about it. Not really. Not when it meant she could come over now, stay at Daryl’s without worrying about being found out. And at least Merle didn’t seem to mind them being together like that. He was a bit mean to her, but Beth believed in what she’d said to Daryl that night—that Merle only did it to make sure she wouldn’t make trouble or hurt Daryl in any way. Even that quip about Zach felt purposeful, and the way that conversation went after felt very much as if Merle was ticking off all the possible ways she could bring harm to his brother on some imaginary list in his head.

Beth couldn’t really blame him, even if his words hurt her a little. She didn’t appreciate him saying all those things about her turning Daryl into someone he’s not, about teaching him new tricks, as if he was just some puppy she wanted to play with—not a human being with his own emotions and dreams. It hurt even more to hear it from Merle, especially because Daryl had basically suggested the same thing earlier, asking her if she thought she could fix him. As if she weren’t irrevocably in love with every part of him...

“We’re still on for today? Four at the clearing?” she asked now, shaking her head to rid herself of unpleasant thoughts. Her eyes found his, and she marveled at him again, at how those stormy blue eyes could hold so much intensity and yet so much softness all at once.

Daryl nodded. “Need me to pick you up somewhere?” he asked, just like he did every other time, and Beth smiled.

“I’ll let you know, okay?”

She leaned in then, smiling softly before planting a sweet, affectionate kiss right on his lips. She could do that now, she realized, and let out a happy sigh when he pulled her even closer, his hand cradling her cheek as he kissed her back.

It was a short, chaste kiss—one that left her breathless and craving more—but Beth knew they couldn’t do more than that right now.

“See you later,” she whispered, moving just far enough to meet his eyes.

“Yeah, I’ll see ya,” he murmured, his voice low and gravelly, his eyes scanning her face like he couldn’t get enough of her either.

The air between them crackled with electricity, and Beth felt her heart skip a beat. Was it always like this? Or was it just them? She held her breath when Daryl leaned in again, closing the small space between them and bringing their lips together in another kiss.

Beth made herself move away and out of the car after that. She couldn’t linger any longer—she knew that Daryl wouldn’t drive her here so early in the morning if it wasn’t necessary. They had agreed on their way to his apartment the day before that she should go back no later than seven in the morning, before her absence became apparent.

Beth watched Daryl drive away, and only after he disappeared behind the tree line did she run to the farm. When she saw her father sitting on the porch, cleaning his boots, she thanked herself for thinking ahead and dressing in sports clothes. Perhaps she wasn’t that bad at sneaking around after all, she thought, as she greeted her dad, no guilt evident on her face, and informed him that she went for some morning jogging in the woods nearby.

That day, as she sat at Mass in the church, she couldn’t really focus on what was being said. Her mind was constantly taking her to the events of the day and night before—to all their conversations, all the kisses exchanged, and a sweet promise of more. She thought about how it felt like he was on the verge of telling her he loved her at the Fair or, perhaps, at the very least, was on the fast route to falling for her. He had started believing in love thanks to her. Her. Can you imagine?

She thought about the dog he won for her, about all the fun they had on different rides and games, and about what happened later, at his place. She felt a pang of sadness when her mind brought her back to his guilt-ridden admission that she was sure now was one of the reasons why he felt undeserving of her. Beth’s heart broke for him when she thought about it, about how he had to walk with that weight on his shoulders now—all because he had tried to protect someone.

Her brain didn’t let her focus on it for too long, though, flashing the images of their other activities in front of her eyes. Hot and much more compelling.

Beth let herself explore those memories. She marveled at all the different ways in which he kissed her, at the feelings his hands wandering around her body evoked, and at how that intimate touch made her lose her mind a little. She thought about the weight of him, the way his body seemed to fit so perfectly against hers, as if made for her. About the way he looked at her—like he wanted to ravish her.

Beth left the church that morning having not heard a word said by Father Matthias. She said her greetings to the other churchgoers, and hugged Lily on her way back to Daddy’s car, but she felt absent throughout it all, her mind still with Daryl. She felt like all the excitement, love, and desire were going to spill out of her if she didn’t share it with someone, so she decided she’d put it all in her diary, alongside the pictures of them kissing in the booth. That way, even years later, she’d be able to revisit this memory.

“Bethy,” her mom stopped her before she could get into the car, and Beth raised her head to see her mom pointing to Lily, who was running up to them.

“What’s up, Lily?” she asked, covering her nerves with a smile.

“Yeah, um, do you have any plans for tonight?” Lily asked, and Beth froze, her mom scrunching her eyebrows in her peripheral vision. “I thought maybe you’d like to come to mine? I feel like we barely see each other lately, you know?”

Beth’s mom snorted, not noticing how the color drained from Beth’s face.

“Barely?” she asked, laughter evident in her voice. “Going out over four times a week. Barely! You kids these days, really!”

Annette shook her head with amusement before getting into the car next to Hershel, none the wiser to the shocked expression on Lily’s face and Beth’s terrified one.

Lily's eyes bore into Beth’s, and the blonde girl shook her head, pleading. Don’t question it, she thought. Just don’t say anything now.

“Yeah,” Beth breathed out, overcoming her internal panic. She raised her voice to make sure their parents heard her from the car. “I mean, sure, yours sounds perfect. At four then? Like we said?”

“Like we said?” Lily asked, surprised, but seeing Beth’s expression, she added, albeit a bit unsure, “Sure, like we said.”

When Beth got into the car, having kissed Lily’s rosy cheeks, her mom spoke again from the front seat, her voice still amused. “So, no community pool today, then?”

Beth shook her head, beating herself up for not coming up with a better cover for her outing today. She should’ve taken into account the possibility of Lily approaching her. It wasn’t the first time she came close to being found out, but before, she always pretended she messed up the hours of the meeting or forgot that something had been rescheduled. It was easy to dodge the bullets when her mom and dad thought of her as a good girl—never lying, never doing anything bad. It was also easy to say she was meeting earlier than she really was or that she was going somewhere with them, when in fact she had told her friends she couldn’t make it.

But this time, Beth just came up with the community pool with Lily, even though they didn’t schedule anything, and that seemed to be a mistake.

“I guess not. We’re still meeting at four, though.”

Annette smiled at her from her seat, and Beth sighed with relief, glancing shortly over at Shawn. Her brother was watching her, his whole face scrunched in worry, and Beth gulped, quickly averting her eyes from him. Maybe Daryl was right after all. Maybe they weren’t that good at keeping it all a secret. On the other hand, it had been some time since it all started, and they were managing just fine until now. It seemed that just as they took a step toward being together, everything started to fall apart around them. Beth just hoped it wasn’t some bad omen.

An hour later, Beth wrote a quick message to Lily, telling her she couldn’t meet her at four, and then reached for her diary.

“You weren’t going to the pool with Lily today, were you?”

Beth jumped at the sound of Shawn’s voice coming from the door. She raised her eyes to see him step inside the room, gently kicking the door shut behind himself. He was looking at her with the same hardened expression as the day before.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Beth answered, her lips forming a thin line.

Shawn snorted. “Sure.”

He eyed her thoughtfully for a second before sighing heavily, his face forming into one of regret and sadness.

“Darn it. Look, I’m not your enemy, Beth.”

“Yeah? Could’ve fooled me.” She didn’t want to say that to him, but her anger was still very much alive inside her. The memory of him hitting Daryl and saying all those awful things about him was still fresh in her mind.

“I’m not the one that blackmailed you,” he argued, and Beth felt heat rising to her cheeks.

“I know, and you know I’m sorry about that, but you gave me no choice, Shawn,” she repeated her words from yesterday at him, making him snort again.

“No choice? Just listen to yourself. He’s…”

“Better watch your words,” Beth interrupted him, and Shawn fell silent for a moment, just watching her with heavy eyes before asking:

“Are you going to see him today?”

Beth clicked her teeth shut, her tummy squeezing with anxiety.

“I’m seeing Lily,” she said, telling herself it wasn’t entirely a lie. Not quite.

“Okay.” Shawn nodded. “I’ll tell Dad I’ll give you a ride then, yeah? Sometime around four? Maybe I’ll even step in for a moment, say hi to Lily’s brother. What do you think?”

The silence that fell upon them after his words was deafening.

“Don’t.” She stopped him when he nodded to himself and turned to leave with a breathless yeah, gonna do that. “I’ll drive myself.”

Shawn turned to her again, and they stared at each other for another long moment, fighting a silent battle, a wordless conversation passing between them, before Shawn nodded again.

“Fine.” His face scrunched in a grimace, and he shook his head at her. “Tell Daryl I’ll keep the pics for now.”

Beth blushed but didn’t speak again, only breathing out a sigh of relief after Shawn left.

The conversation with Shawn left her reeling, but when, over an hour later, she drove herself to her and Daryl’s clearing to see him already waiting for her there, Beth forgot all about that. There he was, looking all dreamy with a crossbow in his hand.

Her man. No matter what Shawn thought. No matter that she’d have to come up with some other lie to get Lily off her back. No matter her parents’ inevitable disappointment or anything else awaiting her on the route she chose. She was his, and he was hers, and as long as Daryl wanted that, there was nothing anyone could do to change it. Not if Beth had anything to say about it.

Beth didn’t even think there was any scenario in which she wouldn’t have a say.

 

*

 

“You took something?” Zach’s question pulled Daryl out of his mind. He finished cleaning his hands off grease and looked up to see the boy watching him with suspicion written all over his face.

“What?” 

It’s been a few days since the Fair and not a day gone by without him seeing Beth. They went to their clearing on Sunday, then she talked him into going for a ride on his bike (he did end up getting her a jacket and a helmet from a thrift store earlier that day. It wasn’t much, but it was a start. It scared him a little when he realized he was already making plans to save some money and get her cooler gear soon, as if she was really going to stick around) on Monday, and Tuesday they went to their clearing again. 

Needless to say, they didn’t train much during those two meetings, both on Sunday and Tuesday his girl used every single opportunity their closeness presented as an excuse for something else. And Daryl would love to say that he was a good teacher and didn’t allow any distractions, kept her on track, but the truth was, he seemed to lose the ability to say no to her. Beth was backing herself into him in an entirely new way, moaning softly when he pressed too close, and everytime he caught her, instead of trying to free herself, she simply surrendered herself to him, leaning in and kissing him sweetly or whispering “do your worst” while biting into her lip, a dangerous look in her eyes. And Daryl was just a weak, weak man. Not that he would admit that to anyone but himself. But he was. All weak for her. All too happy to kiss her back, to feel the things he has never felt before with anyone. 

Daryl knew it was cheesy and stupid, but all he could think was that she was like a drug to him, taking his sanity away from him day by day. Only, unlike any drugs, she was good. Really good. 

“Jeez, this is unsettling, you know? I don’t think I’ve ever seen you smile so much. You sure you’re not on something?” Zach smirked at him when Daryl threw the dirty rag in his face in retaliation. 

“Shut up.” 

Zach laughed, handing him the wrench Daryl was just looking for. It was right next to him, but somehow he overlooked it.

“You know, if I didn’t know any better I’d think” Daryl fixed him with a warning stare, but Zach only laughed and finished unperturbed, “you finally got yourself laid,” 

Screw Merle for making this a thing, Daryl thought to himself. That bastard just couldn’t ever help himself. He had to point it out, had to draw attention to Daryl’s lack of interest, as if it was anyone’s business. And now they all felt like it was okay to joke about Daryl’s sexual life—or the lack of it—on a daily basis. 

“Yeah, yeah, laugh it up,” he told Zach, reaching into his back pocket to take out his phone. Beth’s been texting him since the first thing in the morning. She was on a shopping trip with her friends, looking for things she would need at college, and she kept asking him the most random questions. The one from a little over an hour ago said: do you think I need this? Never shared a room with anyone before. She attached a photo of a room divider. He snorted seeing her blonde head picking out from the side. She was going for a thoughtful expression, but it looked more like her questioning the existence of this thing. 

When Daryl clicked on the picture she attached in the latest text, the one she sent a few seconds ago, he almost dropped his phone.

Yet again Beth was in the picture, but this time she was in a changing room and she was wearing a skimpy lace set of lingerie with a garter belt and delicate straps running from the top of the bra towards her neck. She was smiling in the picture, her eyes on the camera, and a deep blush coloring her cheeks. 

Beth 12:43

And what about that?

He started typing to avoid the temptation of looking at the photo for too long. As if the damage hasn’t been done already. As if this image wasn’t going to be burned in his mind forever now.  

Daryl 12:44

For college?

 

Beth 12:44

Only for when you visit :) 

 

Daryl bit the inside of his cheek to keep from smiling. He was pretty sure his face was on fire though, and Zach only confirmed his suspicions when a second later he practically burst out:

“Oh my God, you did, didn’t you?!” Daryl sent him an unimpressed look that he hoped would deter him, but no such luck. “And you’re texting her, aren’t you?! No! The world must be ending. Daryl Dixon! Dating?!” 

“I ain’t,” he said, even though it was almost definitely a lie.

As he told Beth a few days ago, Daryl never dated anyone. He didn’t have a damn clue what to call this, if it was dating or being in a relationship or whatever. They’d never really talked about it, never had one of those official conversations. But damn if it didn’t feel like something out of one of those cheesy romance novels Beth liked to read.

If he was being honest with himself, it didn’t feel like it had just started either. The Fair might’ve been their first real date, like Beth called it, and sure, she said she wanted to be with him for real, but the whole summer felt like something straight out of a cheap paperback. Daryl didn’t know if that’s how Beth saw it, but looking back now, at the way things had been between them this past month, he couldn’t believe he hadn’t realized they were heading toward something until he finally kissed her.

He didn’t get laid, that wasn’t a lie, but Beth sure as hell seemed to be trying to change that. He’d laugh if it wasn’t making him so damn uneasy. The whole thing was flipped on its head—him, the older, more experienced guy, trying (and failing miserably) to keep things slow, while she—the girl who’d bolted in the middle of the night to avoid sleeping with her boyfriend a few months ago—was now the one pushing him to take that step. Or at least, that’s how it seemed to him.

Maybe she didn’t mean it, though. Maybe she didn’t even realize what she was doing. They sure as hell hadn’t talked about it. He figured she was trying to bring it up when she started talking about sex during that stupid game of "Never Have I Ever.", but then she chickened out and switched the subject. When she didn’t press him on it later, Daryl felt relieved.

Putting his feelings into words was tortuous. He tried doing that anyway, because he knew she deserved it. Beth deserved better than his lame tries too, but talking was never his strong suit. Daryl was a man of action, and it was becoming harder and harder not to act with every single pass she made. Still, Daryl meant it when he said he didn’t want to hurt her. For a girl like Beth, losing her virginity? That was big. Should be special. Hell, it should be with someone better than him. Even if she didn’t see it that way.

“Liar. You’re all red. Oh My God! Are you sexting?!” Zach was following after him, trying to get a look at his phone now. “I can’t believe this, I want to meet this woman…”

“Stop,” Daryl said just as Merle and Jess entered the garage. They didn’t hear us, they didn’t…

“What woman?” Jess asked.

Shit, they did hear. Daryl glanced at Merle, pleading, and his brother smirked in response, an amused glint in his eyes.

“The one who finally broke through Darylina’s tick head, I bet,” Merle showed them his teeth in a disgustingly satisfied smile. “She’s a firecracker, that one.”

“She’s real?! You really are texting her?!” Zach’s mouth formed a perfect ‘o’ at having had his suspicions confirmed. When Daryl only glared in response, the boy turned to Merle hopeful. “You’ve seen her?” 

Daryl wished looks could kill in that moment. That would smash that smug smile right off Merle’s face.

“Of course I’ve seen her, kid. Where do you think he took her to spend the night, huh?” 

His phone pinged and Daryl distractedly opened another photo from Beth. This time, the lingerie wasn’t black but red. It matched the color of her cheeks, and probably his own as well. The material was dotted with red hearts and was partially see-through. Jesus Christ , Daryl thought. What the hell was she thinking sending him these? 

The message that followed had two hearts—one black, the other red with an “or” between them and a question mark. If Daryl was a better man, he’d leave those damn photos alone with people around. But, like he’d already admitted to himself, he was weak for her. And damn, she looked like a dream in both of those sets. He knew how her skin felt under his fingertips, soft and warm, but he’d never seen her like this. Never even seen her in a swimsuit. And here she was, practically teasing him. God, he wanted to touch her so bad right now...

“Shut up, Merle,”  he mumbled, distracted, and jumped a little when he felt his brother tap him on the shoulder.

“Relax, little brother, I ain’t telling them what they don’t need to know,” Daryl turned the screen off in a record time, but it was too late. Merle whistled, ignoring Zach’s protests and focusing entirely on Daryl. He ruffled Daryl’s hair the way he liked doing since they were kids, that stupid smile not coming off his face. “But you might wanna work on that poker face, D. Hard not to see what’s going on here. And I bet that’s not the only thing that’s hard.” 

Daryl shoved him back when Merle theatrically dropped his gaze down, leaning over Daryl’s shoulder. His brother stumbled back a little, his obnoxious laughter filling up the room. 

In hindsight, Daryl knew it was a mistake to bring Beth back home when Merle was around. It wasn’t like Beth gave him much of a choice though. He couldn’t just not go get her when he was sure she was going to jump out of that window, regardless of anything he said to her. Once she set her mind to something there was no deterring her, Daryl had learned that pretty early on. 

It pissed him off, but...

He loved it about her.

“And what’s the secrecy for?” Jess eyed them with a mix of curiosity and suspicion. After all these years, he knew that Merle’s involvement in anything Daryl-related usually meant trouble.

“Yeah, come on now, share with the class! Who is she?” Merle snorted at Zach’s nagging.

“And how’s your little thing going, boy? Fucked that blondie yet?” Merle snickered, seeing Daryl grimace, but Zach didn’t seem to notice, too busy blushing now.

“I wish. I bumped into her once, you know, asked for her number.” Daryl stopped breathing for a second. Beth didn’t tell him about that. “But she kind of brushed me off. You know, maybe if someone didn’t trip me when I was tryin’ to give her a taste of it…” Zach trailed off, a light teasing tone in his voice. Merle showed him his teeth in another one of his smiles.

“Shoulda thought about it before tripping my beer, right?”

Daryl hummed, giving Merle a hard look. His brother’s behavior was throwing him off balance. Not that he didn’t appreciate the support, but Daryl couldn’t for the life of him figure out why Merle was so damn keen on it. He’d welcomed Beth the only way Merle knew how—loud, obnoxious, and perverse, making both her and Daryl squirm in their seats. But, for all Merle’s usual antics, he was surprisingly decent. His brother didn’t even say a thing about it when he walked out of his room at six-thirty in the morning to see Daryl carrying a sleeping Beth to the car.

He did follow him, though, held the door for him and all, and once Daryl got back, he took one long look at him and asked, “Take it, blondie’s here to stay, huh?” Daryl could only nod, nerves eating at him suddenly. But when he chanced a glance at his brother, Merle had this proud glint in his eyes Daryl so rarely saw. “Good. I was startin’ to think I’d have to smash yer face into her cunt myself.”

“Not everything’s about sex, Merle.” Daryl had to defend himself then, but his arguments rarely ever phased Merle, and this time wasn’t any different.

“Oh, don’t I know it. I had to listen to you dumb fucks laugh the whole night. Goddamned kids havin’ a sleepover.” He sounded mean and unhappy about it, but he was smiling. Daryl tried not to smile as well, but his face didn’t seem to listen to him anymore. Not then, and not a single day since his first proper date with Beth.

“Oh, and tell that sweet honey of yours good ol’ Merle says red.”

Merle’s voice raised Daryl from his thoughts just as another message came. Daryl didn’t make the mistake of opening it next to his brother’s curious eyes, though.

“You ever tell her you saw that…” he started instead, but Merle tapped him on the shoulder again.

“Said to relax, didn’t I? Jesus, brother, you tell her to buy both. One’s not enough to unravel what years of celibate did to ya.”

Zach snorted loudly, and Merle’s smile turned a little meaner. He was definitely getting off on the fact that Daryl got the girl Zach had the hots for.

“Wasn’t years,” Daryl said defensively, shoving Merle back again. He wasn’t really sure how long it was. A year, perhaps. At most. Couldn’t be longer than that, right? He remembered that one party they crashed—a hen night full of horny, drunk women. One of them took him upstairs. It was last year, he thought, or perhaps two? Daryl wasn’t going to ask Merle to confirm, though. So what if it’s been a bit longer than usual for him? What with Merle being away a lot and not being able to throw women at him, and then after Sophia, he just had different things on his mind. Well, at least until he realized he was a bit of a creep, liking a just-turned-eighteen girl in an entirely inappropriate manner.

“Something serious then?” Jess asked him after Merle made himself scarce and Zach went to pick up a phone. Daryl shrugged, bashful.

“I hope it is. God knows, you deserve it.”

Jess patted him on the shoulder just like Merle did not so long ago and left him alone. It was all the permission he needed to look at the latest text from his girl.

Beth 13:03
You were taking too long, so I got them both. All your fault.

Daryl snorted. No, he didn’t think he deserved this—definitely didn’t deserve her—and he had no idea why she thought he was worth all the attention. If he was a good man, Daryl thought, the kind of man worth a girl like that, he would tell her to go and find herself someone her age. But he wasn’t, so instead, he let himself tell her what he really thought.

Daryl 13:04
Good. Gonna have a spare one for when I rip one off ya.

He bit into his lip, holding back a groan when he realized he let his intrusive thoughts win. What the hell are you doing, writing to her like that?

“Lost your goddamn mind,” Daryl muttered to himself, but there was nothing he could do about this strange thrill that took over his whole body. He kept watching the screen, waiting for her to say something to it, but nothing came. Did he scare her off? Was that too much too soon? Fuck, he shouldn’t have said that.

Daryl went back to his office, trying to focus on what he had to do before clocking out that day. Call a client, tell him the car is ready. Have a silent freak-out about Beth not responding.

Call another client and tell her that they will need to replace the whole rotor, which will be a bit more expensive than he initially told her. Have a massive freak-out about Beth not responding.

Shuffle through the paperwork. Look at the screen again in hopes that she wrote back. Then read the message you sent to her again, feeling like a massive creep. Go back to the pictures she sent and try not to get another boner.

He was glad he was still sitting in his office, all alone, when her response finally came.

Beth 13:54
Are you planning on doing that anytime soon, Mr. Dixon?

Hell, he was in deep.
Do you want me to?
Depends. Are you planning on taunting me like this every day?
Would do it now if you were here.

Daryl closed his eyes, trying to shield himself from all the arousing pictures that entered his mind with that last thought. Perhaps Merle was right after all. Perhaps it was too long since he had gotten laid. At least that would explain why, with just a few words and two not-so-innocent photos, Beth Greene turned him into a right mess.

Daryl 13:56
How many times do I have to tell ya to stop calling me that?

He knew he was an asshole for not answering her, but he could swear that was the only way for him to keep his sanity intact. None of the answers he had in his mind were going to get him through that day unscathed.

Beth 13:55
How many times do I have to call you that before you do something about it?

Could he really be blamed for all the things he wrote to her during that conversation when she was teasing him like this? He probably could, but for his own sake, he was going to absolve himself of any guilt regarding those texts. It was all her fault.

Daryl 13:57
Good girls do what they are told

Beth 13:59
Or they get punished, right?

That girl was going to be the death of him.

Daryl 14:01
That’s what you want? For me to punish ya?

Beth 14:01
Maybe…

Beth 14:02
Or maybe I just want you to teach me how to be a good little whore for you :)

Daryl gulped, recognizing his own words from months ago thrown back at him instantly. He just couldn’t believe she would be bold enough to repeat those words, and in that context of all things. Was he a terrible influence? If he didn’t think that before, he definitely did now.

Daryl 14:04
Don’t say words you don’t understand, girlie.

Beth 14:05
Or what?

Daryl 14:06
Or you won’t be able to walk back to your car once I’m done with ya tonight.

Beth 14:10
I hope you mean that in a sexy way and not in a ‘gonna kick your ass during training’ kind of way <3

Daryl pressed his lips together, trying not to smile. He put the phone back and breathed out the breath he was holding, trying to calm himself down a little. He did smile when a few minutes later another text came.

Beth 14:14
Daryl? You meant that in a sexy way, right?

Daryl 14:15
See you in an hour, Miss Greene.

When he got to their meeting spot a little over an hour later, she was just pulling over as well. Daryl lit up a cigarette and leaned on his bike while Beth was getting out of the car. He watched her shamelessly, so unlike the way he behaved when they went on their first date. He was still trying to be good then, not undressing her with his eyes when she paraded in front of him in one of the sexiest outfits he’d ever seen her wear. But now he was letting himself indulge in all the things he forbade himself to do for months.

“You’re wearing a dress,” he stated the obvious, eyeing the black material that ended just above her knees. The dress, hanging off her shoulders on straps, was adorned with round silver buttons that went through its whole length. The front of it resembled a corset, and it had a much lower neckline than most of the clothes he’d seen Beth wear—so much so, in fact, that he could see her white bra peeking through it.

Beth blushed, seeing the way his eyes roamed her body. She acted so bashful with him, it was hard to believe this was the same person who called herself a whore in a text a little over an hour ago.

“Yeah, that shopping trip took a bit longer than I thought. Didn’t really have the time to go back home and change…” She avoided his eyes while she was explaining, making him wonder if she was lying. And wasn’t that a thrilling thought? What if Beth had come to this lesson in a dress on purpose? Well, if she did, he was pretty sure he wasn’t going to survive this. “But, you know, I could find myself in a dangerous situation while wearing a dress too, so it’s probably good to practice fighting in it too, right?”

His throat was dry as he uttered a flat, “Right.”

He wouldn’t have been able to say anything else, his brain too caught up in the fact that he now knew what she looked like underneath that dress. And he knew that because Beth wanted him to know. Wanted to show him. Daryl wasn’t sure why, but it was that knowledge—that this was something she desired—that made it hard to restrain himself the most. Not the photos. Not the image of her in the revealing underwear. Just her being so desperate for him. The idea made him gulp, his pants suddenly becoming awfully tight. He needed to move—get them to the clearing before he did something stupid, like kiss her on the side of the road where anyone could spot them.

Daryl went ahead of her, fearing that walking behind her could completely throw him off track. It was hard enough to focus when she was coming here in shorts, and now she was wearing something that he could quite literally pull off of her in one swift motion. It would be so easy. He could just slide those straps off her shoulders. Let the material fall down her body, way to the ground, leaving her in her underwear only, covering her skin with his hands instead. Nobody would hear her moan here if Daryl chose to do that. He could drop to his knees, push her panties aside, and taste her…

Fucking restrain yourself, you sick fuck, Jesus Christ.

But how could he? When Beth came here dressed like this just an hour after she told him she wanted him to do some very questionable things to her? He was riled up even before she stepped out of that car, thinking about her taking those photos for him with her best friends waiting just around the corner. A filthy little secret. Just for him to see.

“Daryl?”

“Mhm?”

Beth took him by the hand, and he barely suppressed a shiver that went through him at the contact. He would have thought after all these training sessions he wouldn’t be fazed by her touch, but it seemed to be working in exactly the opposite way: the more they touched each other, the more his body reacted to her. The harder it was to ignore all the feelings she evoked in him.

“Are you okay? You, um, seem quiet?”

Daryl pushed his tongue between his teeth, trying—and failing—to get himself under control. Yet again, she was giving him whiplash, writing filthy little texts to him one moment and behaving like the most innocent, sweet girl the next. Did she not realize what she was doing to him?

“Yeah,” he murmured, turning to her slowly. “I’m using all my energy on not ripping that lovely lil’ dress off you right now.”

Saying that was a mistake, but he realized it all too late. Speaking to her this way when she was close enough for him to see the exact moment the words registered, to see what effect it had on her, was a dangerous thing to do. Her chest heaved, cheeks flushing a deep red, and her eyes widened as she pushed out a breathless, silent 'oh'.

The air between them stilled and became thick with tension so quickly, it pushed his breath out of his chest. He’d never felt the way he did in that moment, as if someone had put a rubber band inside of him and was pulling on it, stretching it to an impossible length. He had to keep very still, or else it would snap.

“Are you saying that you have a thing for ripping clothes off of people, Daryl?” Beth’s voice was shuddering, just like her whole body, but the way she kept searching his face, her gaze all heated, proved that it wasn’t fear making her shiver.

“No,” he pushed the word out of himself with effort, shaking his head. It was true too; he didn’t. He’d never thought of it before. Never really thought about sex much, if he was entirely honest. He treated it as a means to an end, a thing that could release some of the tension he was feeling. Not even once had he thought about touching someone just for the sake of feeling their skin under his fingers. Never before had he imagined so many sweet ways in which he could pleasure someone either. He definitely hadn’t gotten off on the idea of all the little sounds she would make as he pushed his tongue inside her to taste her—until the “she” in question took the form of Beth in his mind.

As he thought of this, his body moved of its own accord, and Daryl found himself crowding her the way he knew she liked. Beth would gasp in that sweet way he liked every time Daryl leaned over her like this. There was no sound better than this.

“But I got a thing for you,” he added in a hoarse whisper, surprised by his directness.

Beth swallowed audibly, taking the smallest step back. She was moving slowly as well, as if she too didn’t want this stalemate to break. As Beth backed herself into one of the trees surrounding their clearing, he followed, his eyes only leaving hers to slide down her body and back up again. Daryl found her shaking again, her hands resting on the bark behind her all too gently, and her chest heaving with short breaths as she let her eyes stray down to his broad shoulders and lower, ogling him just as shamelessly as he did her.

“And what... what are you going to do about it?” Beth’s voice was close to a whisper when she spoke, taking on that sweet note she used on him every time she tried to sound seductive. The first time she did that—back when he hauled her wet ass off the streets in the middle of the night after her boyfriend’s party—Daryl didn’t recognize it for what it was. He thought then that she was trying to be funny.

Now, after hearing her speak that way to him on multiple occasions, Daryl couldn’t believe he’d been so oblivious. Perhaps that was for the better though. He was pretty sure he’d squirm, get all embarrassed, and run away from her if it had occurred to him then.

Daryl only stopped moving when their chests were just shy of touching. He pushed his hand against the tree bark, resting it behind her head, a protective instinct urging him to keep her safe from harm above all else.

“Only what you want me to do,” he rasped back, probably missing the right answer by a mile. Beth didn’t seem to mind him not disclosing his desires to her though.

“And what if,” Beth let out another shuddering breath when he dipped his head a little lower, their noses brushing, “what if I want you to put your hands under my dress? Will you do it?”

His breath caught in his throat. Here? Now? The reasonable part of his brain tried to deter him, but his body acted before it could succeed. Daryl left one hand on the tree behind her head and sneaked the other one down, grazing her hip lightly with his fingers before moving lower and in between their bodies. He slid his fingers up her thigh, touching her lightly, catching on the material of her dress and raising it slightly.

A silent, breathy whine escaped her, but Daryl still asked:

“Like that?”

He could barely recognize his own voice now—all gruff and low, filled with desire.

“Higher,” Beth breathed out, and he could swear he could taste the word on his lips when he licked them a second later.

He should back off, he knew. Be the responsible one. Take her back to his place maybe. Somewhere they would be safe from anyone walking in on them.

Here, even deep in the woods, there was still a possibility of some hunter stumbling upon them.

Reckless. That’s what it was. But the way she was looking at him, her eyes half-lidded and pupils dilated, got his mind spinning. How could he say no to this?

Daryl did what she wanted him to, his hand traveling up her thigh, his touch growing less light. When Beth responded by opening her thighs slightly, his fingers sliding to the inner side of her thigh, Daryl had to hold back a whine.

“Please, Daryl...”

The sound that escaped her traveled through his body in waves, and if he wasn’t already painfully turned on, this would definitely do the trick.

“Please what?” he asked still, mindful of her limits. Even now, almost driven mad by desire, Daryl would step back and away from her the moment Beth gave him any indication that she didn’t want him there. She was the only thing that mattered to him. Scary as it was.

“Higher,” she whispered into his lips before kissing him deeply.

This time he didn’t catch himself in time, and a silent groan escaped him into their passionate caress. There was nothing shy about the way Beth pulled on his hair, angling his head in just the right way to deepen the kiss, her tongue pushing into the warmth of his mouth unapologetically.

Just like every other time they kissed, it completely blindsided him. His head spinning and heart threatening to jump out of his chest, he leaned even more into her, chasing the heat of her and reveling in the sweet press of her body against his.

Daryl gripped her hard, squeezing her thigh in his hand before moving his finger only an inch higher, not touching her where she apparently wanted him to yet.

“You sure?” he asked first, his fingers massaging the skin of her inner thigh.

He was doing it again. Going against his own damn words. He was well aware. Just a bit over an hour earlier, he thought she deserved better than him, better than this, and yet, here he was, putting his hands under her dress in the middle of the woods. Dying to feel the heat of her under his fingers, even as he rasped:

“We don’t have to...”

She shut him up with another feverish kiss, his cock twitching in his pants when her fingers raked down his shoulders.

“I’ve been thinking about this the whole day, Daryl,” she said breathlessly a moment later, her breath ghosting on his lips. “Why do you think I’ve sent you these pics?”

Daryl could only groan at this as he crushed his lips against hers. He swallowed her moan, trapping his hand in between their bodies as he pushed against her. He knew she could feel him now, hard and heavy against her hip—the undeniable proof of his desire for her.

“Did you like ’em?” she asked when they separated for quick breath, and a short laugh bubbled out of him.

“Did I fuckin’ like ’em?” he echoed, his tone rich with amusement and heat. “Jesus, Beth,” he murmured, his lips brushing her temple before trailing down to her ear, “you’ve been drivin’ me crazy all damn day.”

He nibbled at her ear, then moved down to her neck, to where he’d left his mark a few days ago. It had faded a little and was barely visible under the makeup she put on it, but it still made something in his gut stir. He pressed his lips to it before rasping into her skin:

“Couldn’t do nothin’ but think ’bout touchin’ you.”

“Yeah, please, just…” Her breath hitched when he nibbled at her skin where the mark was, then started kissing the spot, his tongue licking into her skin. When she spoke next, her voice turned desperate, feverish even. His insides squeezed almost painfully at the sound of it.

“Daryl, please, just touch me, I want you to, please.”

She ended that sentence with a whine, louder than any of the other ones, as he pushed his small finger up to graze her panties. Daryl might have disliked touching before, but he’d never been this scared of touching someone else. He’d never cared about doing it right before, but now it was all he could think about, leaning back and watching her face carefully as he brushed the material in a feather-like touch. Beth stared at him right back, her gaze haunted, eyes darkened with desire, and lips caught between her teeth. She must have seen his apprehension reflected in his eyes, must have felt the loud, fast thrumming of his heart, as just a moment later, she slid down the tree slightly, putting an end to his light caress.

They both groaned as he pressed into the wet material, feeling the heat of her under his fingertips. Once again, it was Daryl who crushed their lips together in a bruising kiss. Beth was matching his energy, though, kissing him just as hard, as if she wanted to leave a permanent mark on his lips.

The smell of her perfume, of the soft, fruity scent of her shampoo, was making him dizzy. He hoped it lingered on his skin after, the way it did on his couch the whole morning after he drove her back home from their sleepover. Daryl slept there through the rest of that morning, his face pressed into the cushions, breathing her in, pretending that she was still there with him. He wished he could bottle it up, or better yet, always have her there next to him.

As he moved his lips from hers to kiss her jaw and descend lower to her neck again, Daryl let his fingers slip under her panties for the first time. His fingers slid easily between her wet lips, the heat of her enveloping him and making him groan. God, she was so wet. So wet for him.

His hips snapped into hers involuntarily, his cock twitching in his pants again when she responded with another one of her beautiful moans.

“Oh my God, Daryl,” she mumbled, her back arching and her chest pressing into his even more firmly as she grabbed at him almost desperately. Her hands were flying from his shoulders to his hair as if she wasn’t sure which part of him she wanted to touch the most.

“I know,” he breathed out, just as overwhelmed. Beth was watching him, her breath fast and uneven, and her mouth opening to let out another moan, as he gently moved his fingers through her damp folds. She looked divine like this, shaking lightly, broken sounds escaping her as he massaged her clit with slow, deliberate motions. “Damn, look at you,” he rasped before ducking his head to press his lips to the skin of her cheek, then her jaw, and finally to her pulse point. His next words were mumbled into her skin. “So beautiful.”

Beth moaned at his words, her hips snapping into his hand, bringing his finger lower to where her hot entrance was.

“Daryl…” His insides twisted at the way his name sounded in her mouth, and he pressed himself into her more closely, seeking a bit of that sweet friction. When he raised his head a moment later, it was to watch her moan again, her orgasm hitting her abruptly. He groaned, feeling her shudder in his arms, her legs closing around his hand and a sound akin to a broken sob escaping her.

Daryl wanted to commit that sight to his memory forever. Beth’s cheeks were all red, warm to the touch, her breath coming in short, and her lips forming a perfect little ‘o’ as another beautiful sound escaped her. One strap of her dress slid down her shoulder, and most of her hair, where she was pressing her head back into his other hand, got out of her hairband, forming a bit of a mess on her head. She was the most beautiful woman he’d ever seen, and when she opened her eyes, still coming undone under his touch, Daryl felt that rubber band inside him snapping. There was no coming back from it, he realized, as their lips collided again, their bodies pressing together heatedly against the tree.

Daryl felt the thud of their combined heartbeats, her breath mingling with his, when Beth reached down to press her hand to his crotch.

“I want to make you feel good too,” she whispered against his lips, and all he could do was nod when she followed it up with a question, “Can I?”

The clasp of his belt coming undone made him shudder a little, but he didn’t move away when she reached for him. He couldn't move in that moment, even if he'd wanted to. His emotions pressed down on him, making it hard to breathe and think rationally. Once her hand closed around him, all he could do was crash into her even more and whine at the feeling. He pressed his forehead into hers, their breaths mingling again, and his eyes falling shut. He couldn’t watch her now, or else he wouldn’t last one second before coming all over their clothes.

His hips snapped desperately when she moved her hand from where she grabbed him, down his shaft and back up. Her slender fingers were soft and gentle, as if she was afraid of putting too much pressure on him. It was driving him mad.

“Is that okay? I’ve never done this…” she whispered to his ear, and he mumbled back something that he hoped sounded like reassurance before dropping his head and feverishly nibbling at the skin of her shoulder.

Truth be told, Daryl didn’t think there was anything she could do to make this unpleasant, not when even the lightest press of her fingers on the tip of his cock made him fall to pieces. She coated her fingers with his juices, her pads skimming through his skin in a way that made him buckle into her hand, his body seeking more friction. Beth took him in her hand again, trying out the same motion she did before, this time closing around him more firmly. He wanted to tell her that she didn’t need to be so careful with him, but the words got trapped in his throat.

Damn it...

He needed to feel her again. Was dying to make her feel good again.

Daryl slid his hand back in between her thighs, under her soaked panties. Beth gasped when he rubbed his finger into her, still so wet, so damn wet for him, Jesus, then moaned when he pressed his finger gently into her entrance, not expecting this new sensation. Her legs closed around him again with just the tip of his finger buried inside her. He felt her pulsating around him, the tight squeeze making him groan and swear under his breath. He’d never felt it with such clarity before, this need to bury himself inside her.

But that wasn’t important. Only her. She was the only thing that mattered.

“You okay?” he whispered against the skin of her neck before raising his head to take in her beauty again. Beth was trembling, but when their eyes found each other, she smiled.

“Yeah, it’s just so… intense.”

He could taste their shared breaths when she spoke, their lips hovering over each other again.

“Want me to stop?”

He should. It was neither safe nor romantic to be doing this in the woods with her, but Beth shook her head, her hand coming down on him in a long, torturous stroke. His hips buckled into it, as if they had a mind of their own, and Beth’s eyes dropped down to watch as she stroked him again, her motions becoming faster, her hold on him just a little tighter with every stroke.

“I want you to,” she whispered, gulping when he moved his finger inside her, “come all over my fingers.”

If he was with anyone else, he would be ashamed of the sound that escaped him then.

“Girl,” he licked into her mouth, forgetting words as she repeated the motions on him. She didn’t even need any spit for it to be good, that’s how wet he was. She twisted her hand on him, and he all but sobbed, something inside him unveiling at this sensation. “You sure you’ve never done that before?”

Beth took in a shuddering breath, an embarrassed laugh pushing out of her chest.

“I, um, might have watched some videos last night.”

He swore again. The mere thought of it, of her sitting under her covers, watching porn, and thinking about touching him, almost made him come. In retaliation, he started stroking her again, pushing his finger in that toe-curling spot just enough to force another few surprised moans out of her, but not enough to break her in. Or so he hoped. The last thing he wanted was to make it painful for her.

When her second orgasm hit her, Beth moaned his name again, her lips pressing into his neck, closing on his skin as she tried to muffle herself. He could feel her walls tightening on the tip of his finger, then covering him with even more of her juices. That feeling was what pushed him to the edge.

He pulled away just in time, keeping it off her dress. His fingers were still slick with her, he could feel it, just like her breath against his. A sound that ripped itself out of his throat as he held onto himself was close to a sob. He came hard, his cock pulsing in his hand almost painfully as it coated his fingers with his sperm. A violent shudder came over him when he raised his head to catch Beth watching him, her pupils dilated, lip caught between her teeth as she stared at his cock. She was breathing hard still, looking both like a mess and a goddess to him, and all Daryl could think about was that he hadn’t tasted her yet.

He reached back into his pocket and pulled out his red handkerchief. He made quick work of cleaning his fingers. Then, Daryl dropped to his knees in front of her, the way he had thought about before, his mouth finding the soft skin of her thighs. Beth quivered under his touch, but her knees came apart for him yet again. When Daryl reached her panties, he pressed his lips to the fabric, looking up at her to check if it was alright. Beth stared at him in awe, as if she couldn’t quite comprehend what was happening. But when she gave him a slight nod, it was enough for him to push the material aside, his tongue sliding between her hot, wet lips.

Beth moaned, her legs trembling around him, threatening to give out under her. Daryl moved back a little, marveling at the way she gasped.

“No, don’t stop,” she pleaded, and Daryl had to hold back a groan at the way she sounded. If he could hear her like that every day, he'd be good. So good.

He didn’t hesitate. Licked his lips, then pulled her panties down, slow enough to see if she'd try to stop him. Beth didn't. Daryl didn’t slide them down all the way, only enough for it not to get in his way. Then Daryl gripped her thighs in his hands hard, spreading them and supporting her weight a little bit more securely at the same time. She made another desperate sound when he found her wet, hot clit again, his tongue pressing into her firmly.

They both moaned as he lapped at her juices with passion, fueled both by her loud, pleased sobs and the fact that it was all for him. She came for him, thanks to him, right under his fingers, and the thought of it alone was making him half-hard already. But to be able to taste the proof of her want for him on his tongue? That was addictive, mind-blowing even, and Daryl found himself panting as he licked her all clean, his erection still dripping from when he had come just a few minutes before.

“Oh, Daryl, I think I’m gonna…” She interrupted herself with a moan, her thighs squeezing his head suddenly, almost forcefully, as she came for him a third time. Daryl held onto her—or held her up, he wasn’t sure anymore—as his world narrowed to the taste of her on his tongue, to the hot, sweet embrace in which she had him locked. This one hit her hard, and Daryl could only moan from the pleasure of experiencing it with her like that.

They were coming down from it, their breathing evening out, when Beth laughed softly. Daryl raised his head from where it rested on her thigh to eye her questioningly. She swallowed audibly, seeing his wet face smeared with her fluids. He must have looked like a right mess, but he didn’t care. Daryl licked his lips, then dragged his fingers through his beard, gathering her juices on his fingers. He eyed them thoughtfully for a moment before pushing his fingers into his mouth to taste her again.

She gasped. He looked up, saw the way she was staring at him, and it hit him—something in her eyes. He didn’t know what it was, but it was raw.

“You were right,” she croaked, smiling, all red-cheeked and dreamy. “I don’t think I’ll be able to walk back to my car. My legs feel all wobbly.”

Daryl grunted, something tight in his chest. 

“I guess I’ll have to give ya another one of those serious piggybacks then, huh?”

He pushed her panties up her legs carefully, leaning in to kiss the smooth skin of her thighs before sliding them into place. Then he got up, listening to her giggle joyfully at his quip.

“I guess you will,” she said, smiling at him. Her eyes were glinting in the sun as she traced the lines of his face.

He didn’t say it. Hell, he didn’t even know how. But goddamn it, she was everything to him. 

Notes:

I’ve never written straight smut before, so here’s hoping it’s not awful!
I was so stressed writing this—like, you have no idea.
And when I say that, I mean I wrote those scenes recently because when I first started this story a few years ago, I was too chicken shit to write the smutty bits.
Ah, how things have changed! Now, I was stressed, but I also really enjoyed it, so I hope you enjoyed it too! xD
Also, I think this chapter is the longest one in the story because I decided not to be a little shit and cut it in the middle of their sexy time—yes, you're welcome! XD

Chapter 26: They're dead

Summary:

Beth comes to see Daryl at his work - even though she wasn't invited and thing happen.

OR

Daryl is struggling with some of the aspects of his desire for Beth, and Beth uncovers something she wasn't meant to see...

Notes:

Thank you all for your comments <3
Here is the next chapter – and since you've been asking, I can tell you a little secret: this story will have one or two chapters more than 31 XD. I don’t know how many more yet, so I’m not changing the number yet, but I keep writing new parts and I'm having way too much fun with it.

Hope you enjoy this one as well!

Happy Holidays, everyone! <3

***

Dixon’s garage was almost completely silent and dark when Beth entered. She stood in the lobby for a second, holding her breath as she waited for someone to come and greet her. When nobody did, Beth moved through the lobby and around the counter to the hall that led to the back. She felt her skin prickling, excitement overtaking her as she stepped into the only lit room in the whole compound. Music was playing softly from a small radio perched on one of the shelves, and the only other noises—the clank of metal and quiet grunts—came from one of the cars. Its hood was open, and a familiar hunk of a man was leaning over the engine. Beth wasn’t sure what made her insides twist in desire more: the sounds or the sight of him. His jeans hung low on his hips, an orange handkerchief peeking out of his back pocket, his grey wifebeater covered in grease, same as his arms. She stepped closer as if led by some invisible thread. How anyone could ever walk past this man without feeling the raw, magnetic pull she now felt, she had no idea. It was a force so intense it seemed to ignite every nerve in her body, goosebumps rising on her skin at the thought of the night she had ahead of her. If he let her stay, that is.

Daryl’s eyes snapped to her when she was just a few steps away from him, and Beth stopped in the middle of her next step, his look pinning her in place. She hadn’t seen him since he dropped to his knees in front of her and put his mouth where no other man’s had ever been. He had quite literally made her see stars that day, bringing her a kind of pleasure she’d never felt before. That was two days ago, but Beth still hadn’t gotten over how it felt to have him touch her like that. She could still feel the ghosts of his fingers on her thighs, the press of his hot lips on her skin, his scent all over her, marking her as his, just like the hickey he’d left on her skin by accident.

It was all she could think about since.

“Beth?” he rasped after a moment of stunned silence. There was a crease between his eyebrows that only deepened when he dropped his gaze to her pink bag. “What—what’s goin’ on?”

He moved away from the car’s hood then, one of his hands reaching for the handkerchief. Beth swallowed audibly, watching him as he cleaned his hands of grease before walking up to her. It reminded her of how she’d made him come all over his fingers, and the way he’d then cleaned himself methodically before dropping to his knees in front of her. He just kept surprising her that day, and thinking back to it now—the way he behaved, the way she behaved—it was downright pornographic. Beth was pretty sure the image of Daryl sitting on his haunches and gathering some of her juices from his face to then press his finger into his mouth would forever be etched in her brain. She wasn’t sure what was so hot about it, but if she was being totally honest with herself, even the way he was breathing seemed awfully attractive to her.

It was bordering on insane how much she was into him.

His arms glinted with sweat, all sharp edges and defined muscles, and the image of him had her brain short-circuit. For a second, she all but forgot why she’d come here. Not that she really had any reason other than the overpowering desire to see him.

They hadn’t seen each other since Wednesday, and she was supposed to go to the fair with her friends the next day. Beth wouldn’t be home until Sunday evening, and with him working late tonight, they wouldn’t see each other until Monday at the very least. Perhaps even Tuesday. The notion just didn’t sit right with her. Perhaps she should’ve asked him before coming here, though… The thought didn’t occur to her until now, and Beth found herself biting her lip nervously.

“Hi.” Something soared in her when the corner of his mouth raised in that half-smile Beth loved, and she couldn’t help but answer with her own little smile. The way he looked at her then put her instantly at ease. His eyes glistened with warmth and, although he was surprised to see her, he didn’t look like he minded. Not at all. “You said you were going to be here all by yourself until late in the evening, so I thought I could keep you company.”

He kept watching her silently for a moment longer, his eyes roaming over her face and his hands flexing where he’d crossed them on his chest. She felt ready to combust from this alone.

“Mhmm,” he grunted, indicating her bag with his chin. “And that?”

Beth flushed red under Daryl’s piercing gaze.

“Well,” she started, squeezing the bag’s straps in her hands and looking away—not because she was ashamed, but because she was pretty sure he would be able to tell exactly what had been on her mind if she kept looking at him while explaining. Not that she didn’t want him to know how amazing it felt for her to have his hands and mouth on her, but it was still all so fresh, so new. Beth still struggled to find the best way to talk about it without turning bright red and stuttering. “I might have lied to my parents that I’m going to stay at Amy’s place for the night. It’s just easier that way, what with us leaving first thing in the morning, you know?”

Beth raised her eyes to him when he didn’t speak right away, anxious to see his reaction. Daryl’s face was carefully blank, as if he was doing everything in his power not to react to her words at all. She knew it affected him, though—the idea that she wanted to spend another night at his place. She could see it in the tension that suddenly overtook him, in the clench of his teeth and the way he held his breath in. It was his turn to avert his eyes, the tips of his ears heating up and his thumb rising to his mouth for a second before he changed his mind and dropped his hand down. Daryl reached for her bag then, and Beth’s fingers twitched when they came in contact with his, electricity surging through her body as fast as lightning.

“Is that okay with you?” she asked, unable to take it any longer.

Daryl made a sound—something between a scoff and a snort.

“Yeah, it’s… fine,” he murmured a little breathlessly, taking the bag from her. “But aren’t you gonna get bored?” he asked, his eyes scanning her face still. “Watchin’ me work ain’t exactly excitin’.”

“Says you,” Beth retorted, then giggled, seeing his doubtful expression. Her voice turned playful as she said, “Don’t worry, I can keep myself entertained.”

She flashed him an open smile then, and his lips twitched and raised to a smile.

“Entertained, huh? That’s what you call talkin’ my ears off?” he teased, seeing her playful expression.

The tension didn’t entirely leave his body, though, nor did it break between them. It was as if her whole skin was vibrating with the need to be touched by him. As he turned around, Beth felt a pang of disappointment at not being greeted with a kiss, a touch—anything. That wouldn’t do, she decided, following his movements with her eyes. That wouldn’t do at all.

Daryl walked to the long table pushed against the wall to deposit her bag on it. She wouldn’t mind him depositing her there next, Beth thought, blushing at her thoughts. It was as if her brain had switched to a constant state of horniness lately, and all she could think about now was that she wanted to experience all those tingly, pleasurable feelings again. And again. And again. She hoped he was thinking about her just as often, just as intensely. She hoped he wanted to do those things again. Soon. Preferably tonight.

“I don’t know, Daryl.” She started, taking a huge breath of air and pushing herself to act on her instincts. “Maybe I won’t talk at all? Maybe…”

She followed him to that table and turned around to press her back into it, looking up at him with what she hoped were seductive eyes. “I’ll just sit here and silently stare at you instead, hm?”

Beth pressed herself so close to him that she felt his side against hers as she propped herself up and sat on the table. She let her thighs part a little and didn’t miss the way his eyes dropped to her legs—completely bare, save for her high-waisted shorts—before snapping right back to her face.

“And what’s so entertainin’ about that?” he murmured, unconvinced, and Beth laughed softly before leaning into his space a little, her eyes never leaving his. She wasn’t sure where she got the bravery to do what she did next.

“You’d be surprised,” she mused, and only then, almost theatrically, dropped her gaze down to rake it over his arms and chest, way down to his belt and the outline of his cock pressed against his zipper. She swallowed audibly, seeing him already half-hard even though they hadn’t even touched. The heat she found in his gaze when she raised her eyes to meet his again made it hard to breathe, her insides twisting and her pussy clenching so suddenly that it made her gasp. Perhaps she wasn’t the only one replaying their last encounter in her head every single minute of the last two days. It looked like he was just as affected by it as she was.

For a second, Beth thought he was going to kiss her, step between her legs, and do to her all the unholy things she’d dreamed about. But then Daryl moved away, clearing his throat and looking away from her.

“I’ll try to make quick work outta this,” he told her and started turning away, intent on going back to his work. Beth caught him by his wrist at the last moment, his skin warm and pleasant under her fingers.

“Daryl,” she said, gently pulling him in her direction again and marveling at how easily he went, no resistance at all. “Why don’t you give me a little kiss first?”

She smiled, holding in a shudder as he stepped between her legs, his hand turning in her grip and fingers sliding between hers instead. Daryl cast a quick glance at the door before leaning in, but not kissing her yet. His other hand came up to cradle her head, and with his lips ghosting over hers, his breath making her lips tingle, Daryl murmured:

“I ain’t gonna get nothin’ done if I start kissin’ you now.”

Beth’s breath hitched at the admission, something hot and heavy settling below her tummy.

“Yeah? And why is that?” she breathed out teasingly, her eyes falling shut as she nuzzled into his nose, bringing them even closer.

“You know why.”

Daryl’s hand moved to caress her cheek, the touch of his rough pads on her skin sending a wave of heat down her body. She opened her eyes when she felt him pressing his thumb into her lower lip, just in time to see his eyes snapping up from where he’d been staring at her lips, his gaze dark and full of lust.

“Tell me anyway.”

Daryl shook his head, and if it wasn’t for the way his breath hitched when she closed her thighs around him, successfully pulling him even closer, she’d think he was exasperated with her. She watched him wet his lips with his tongue, leaving them glistening and even more tempting.

“Look,” he muttered, his voice gruff, though it wavered just slightly. “I need to finish this car. I promised that woman it’s gonna be ready first thing in the mornin’.”

Daryl pointed to the car behind him with his head and then pushed back against her grip on him. Beth tightened her hold on his waist, her legs rounding him and bringing their bodies almost flush. She took a sharp breath when she felt the hard outline of his cock press into her. Daryl’s hands found her thighs instinctively, his calloused palms meeting her warm skin. The heat of his touch sent a jolt through her, leaving her balanced somewhere between comfort and desire.

“What woman? Is she pretty?” she asked him cheekily, and Daryl snorted.

“Well, is she?”

He shook his head at her again, his lips turning up into a little smirk as he finally leaned forward and slotted their lips together in a short, chaste kiss.

“You’re pretty,” he murmured against her lips before kissing her again.

Daryl took her lower lip in his teeth teasingly before slipping his tongue between her lips, deepening the kiss, and Beth felt her whole body shiver with anticipation. She pushed her hands up his chest, one of them curling in the material of his t-shirt and pulling him even closer, as if they weren’t already on the brink of melting into each other. She gripped his naked shoulder with the other hand, then moved it to cradle his neck as she kissed him back feverishly. Her skin felt like it was burning where he touched her, his fingers tangling in her ponytail for a second before moving down her back to press her even more tightly into him, as if he too thought they were still not close enough.

By God, did she love the way he was embracing her. Every kiss left her feeling foggy, like her thoughts had turned into cotton wool—soft, hazy, and tangled in the best way.

Daryl pulled back but didn’t go far, resting his forehead against hers, his eyes squeezed shut and throat working hard. Beth took him in, her heartbeat quickening, as she thought, not for the first time: I’m so in love with you, Daryl Dixon.

She opened her mouth, ready to tell him that, to disclose this one little unsaid thing between them, when he opened his eyes and moved his head back enough to look at her properly.

“Happy now?” Daryl asked, his lip curling into a half-smile. His voice sounded even rougher than usual, and it did things to her she didn’t think anyone would ever understand.

“Yeah, I’m very happy, Daryl,” Beth answered with a bright smile, thinking not only about that particular moment but her whole relationship with Daryl. She was never really miserable, save for those few times when her school folk called her names for liking Daryl, but she’d never known happiness could feel like this either. It was on a completely different level. Cotton wool brain level. It made her wish she could press pause on everything else and just spend every living, breathing moment in this little bubble they’d created.

“Good, ‘cause I ain’t kissin’ you again until I’m done with this shit.”

He moved his hands to her legs and pulled her off himself with such ease that it made it glaringly obvious he hadn’t given it a real try when he tried pulling back before.

“Oh, come on now!” Beth huffed, playfully offended, and Daryl laughed—low and rough, like gravel rolling downhill—the sound unexpected but warm, carrying just enough of a tease to make her heart skip. He moved back to where he’d been standing when she came in, his arm briefly dropping to his crotch to adjust himself, and Beth thought she must have really lost her mind for this man, because she found it hot too.

She pulled her legs up and crossed them, just as he turned around to give her another long look.

“Thought you said you didn’t mind watchin’ me work?” he questioned her playfully, throwing his hand up as if it could drive his point better.

“I don’t.” She shrugged, pretending to be indifferent even as she gave him an evil look. “I just don’t like that stupid rule. No kissin’ during work? Bleh.”

Beth made a face at him, and a breathy little giggle escaped Daryl in turn.

“Yeah, not like this shit can get you fired or nothin’,” he said, eyeing her with amusement.

“It can’t get you fired,” she shot back, crossing her hands on her chest for good measure. “I mean, you’re the boss.”

“Ain’t.” He said, not looking at her, his attention on the car now. “Jess is. I just own this shithole on paper.”

“Yeah, but he’s not gonna fire you, and it’s not like he’s here anyway. You said they were all away, right?”

Daryl grunted, leaning over the car’s engine again.

“More or less,” he muttered. “Garry had his birthday yesterday. I left at 4, but the lot of ‘em finished drinkin’ at like 11 this mornin’. That’s when Merle got home, at least. I figured they’re all in beds or lyin’ in a ditch somewhere.”

Beth smiled, eyeing his ass shamelessly as he leaned down over the car’s engine.

“Why aren’t you?” Daryl shot her a look over his shoulder, as if he could tell what she was doing somehow, and Beth blushed heavily, realizing it had the opposite effect on her. Instead of making her feel awkward or ashamed, it flared up her desire. “In bed, I mean.”

"I had a job to do. Ain’t like it’s gonna finish itself.”

“Wow, she must be really pretty,” she teased him, and Daryl snorted again, this time rolling his eyes at her for good measure too.

“Stop.”

“You didn’t say she’s not.”

Daryl straightened up and closed the car’s hood with a loud thud in one very practiced motion. The noise made her jump in her seat. He turned around to her then and shot her a glare that made her toes curl in an unexpected way. She raised an eyebrow at him, challenging him, even though she had to hold back a shudder while doing so. They looked at each other for a few moments, and then Daryl deflected, a loud, drawn-out breath leaving him. He dragged his hand down his face, defeated, before speaking again: “Honestly? Wouldn’t fuckin’ know, ‘right?”

“What do you mean?” she asked, even though a small, knowing smile started forming on her lips.

“I don’t even remember how she looked.” Daryl shrugged, and before she could question him more, he motioned with his hand at her and asked gruffly: “You ever changed a tire before?”

“No, Dad and Shawn always took care of that. Why?”

“Wanna try?”

If she was being honest with herself, Beth was starting to question whether there was anything she didn’t want to try with him. Even the most mundane things that she’d never been interested in before suddenly sounded perfectly fine with him in the picture.

That’s how she ended up on her knees with a tire iron in hand, trying to focus on the task at hand and not on Daryl’s closeness as he showed her what to do. Daryl crouched beside her, his hands steady as they guided hers to the lug nuts.

“First, you gotta loosen these,” he said, his voice low and patient, as if he were teaching her something far more sacred than changing a tire. “Like this—don’t put your back into it too much, or you’ll hurt yourself. Let the tool do the work.”

Beth bit her lip in concentration, glancing at him out of the corner of her eye. “What if I don’t got all your superhuman strength?” she teased lightly, but her cheeks warmed when he smirked.

“You don’t need it,” Daryl replied, his tone softening. “And you’re stronger than you think anyway.”

The words made her pause, her fingers tightening on the wrench. He sounded like he meant it, and coming from him, out of all people, it seemed like the biggest praise. Beth would’ve never marked herself as strong, not physically, nor mentally, but as she sat next to him on the cold workshop’s floor, she wished for him to be right. Beth wanted to be strong. For him. For them. 

Beth felt his gaze on her as she gave the lug nut another twist, this time successfully loosening it. Warmth spread through her upon seeing him smile, and Beth thought: how on Earth could people of this town look at this sweet honest man and think he was hurting people?

“There you go,” he muttered once they finished the first of four tires. They went through the remaining four, Daryl taking care of two of them by himself in record time and letting Beth do the fourth one, this time without guidance. He looked proud when she succeeded, and Beth decided to use that to her advantage. They were still crouching next to the car when she asked him, smiling cheekily:

“Don’t you think I deserve a kiss for that?”

Daryl grunted, but instead of leaning in, he got up and reached out to her. Beth’s hands were smudged with grease, so she showed him his palm, shaking her head, and went to get up by herself. Before she could do that, Daryl grabbed her greasy hand and pulled her up. Beth squealed in surprise, suddenly finding herself standing. Not for long though. Before she could complain about her greasy hands again, Daryl had her in his arms, his hands gripping her thighs as he lifted her effortlessly off the ground. Beth gasped, her protests dying in her throat as he adjusted her weight, holding her firmly.

“Daryl!” she finally managed, her cheeks heating with a mixture of surprise and indignation. “What are you doing? I’m gonna get grease all over you!”

Daryl snorted, looking up at her, his blue eyes glinting in the garage’s light.

“Don’t matter. Ain’t like I’m clean myself, girl.”

Beth couldn’t help but giggle, all giddy. The sound died on her lips as soon as it started though, when she saw the look he was giving her. A dark, heated thing.

“You said you wanted a kiss?”

“Yeah,” she breathed out. “I do.”

Beth gave up trying to save his skin from dirt and pushed her hands around his neck as she leaned into him heavily. Daryl secured her legs around his waist before moving one of his hands up to her head and pushing their faces to meet. He didn’t kiss her lips though, instead smooching one of her cheeks.

“Here?” he asked, and Beth laughed, shaking her head. He tried again, this time getting her nose. She scrunched it up and shook her head again when he asked: “Or here?”

Daryl pushed her head even lower after that and pressed a drawn-out kiss to her forehead. She felt both frustrated with him and utterly enchanted by the tenderness of the moment. His rough, calloused hand cradled her head with surprising care, and she couldn't stop the little laugh that bubbled up from her chest, even as her heart pounded in anticipation. He kept laying kisses on her skin, everywhere but her lips, getting her temple, her jaw, and another cheek next.

"Daryl," she murmured, her voice a mixture of exasperation and affection. "Why are you teasin' me?"

He grinned—an actual grin, rare and unguarded—as he finally let his lips brush just the corner of hers. "I ain't," he muttered, his voice low and gravelly.

Beth gave him a playful glare, her hands tightening around his neck. "Stop messing around."

"Who's messin'?" he challenged, his grin fading into something softer, more serious. Then, without any more hesitation, he kissed her properly, his lips capturing hers in a way that stole her breath.

It was slow, deliberate—like he wanted to make sure she felt every second of it. And she did. He didn’t stop kissing her when he moved, walking them both back to the table, his lips and tongue exploring her with frenzied need, and by the time he deposited her gently on the hard surface of it, her head was swimming. She’d never thought much of kissing before—never saw it as something this engaging—but now every kiss was a novelty to her. She was so gone on him, it was becoming painful, the way she fixated on every caress of his lips, on the way his tongue moved along hers, seeking her warmth and awakening every cell in her body all at once.

When he finally pulled back, their foreheads rested together, her breath mingling with his, and her heart trying hard to jump out of her chest. "That better?" he asked, his voice rough but tinged with humor.

Beth smiled, her cheeks warm as she nodded. "Yeah. That’s better." She leaned in to kiss him again, their lips meeting in a brief, soft kiss, before she asked, “You said you weren’t gonna do that until you’re finished. Does that mean you are?”

Daryl snorted, his lips finding hers in a mirrored version of the kiss she just gave him.

“Nah, still gotta clean this motherfucker,” he said, drawing back, and Beth couldn’t help the disappointed sigh that escaped her as she pouted. Daryl laughed, shaking his head at her in something between amusement and wonder. “But tell you what, sweetheart, it can wait till the mornin’.”

Her breath hitched at the term of endearment, and his lip quirked up, eyes glinting, as if he was well aware of how it affected her.

“Really?”

“Yeah, come on. Let’s get you in the shower before you start complainin’ about all the dirt I put on you.” With that, he moved away, snatching her bag with one hand and lacing the fingers of another through hers to pull her along. Beth giggled, jumping down from the table and following him to the back door that led to the backyard and his apartment. This night was turning out just the way she wanted it to.

*

Daryl watched the dark imprint of his hand on the back of her tights, his fingers etched into the skin right under her butt, as she walked away from him and in the direction of his bathroom. He’d never felt possessive before he’d met her, never really cared about anything enough to put his claim on it, but as he eyed the mark he accidentally left on her, Daryl felt his pants growing impossibly tight, his mind going feral at the idea that she was his. For now at least. He still expected her to change her mind, even though she told him repeatedly that she wouldn’t, but that wasn’t what he was thinking about at that particular moment.

He imagined himself moving, grabbing at her just as she reached the bathroom doors. He could almost hear the way Beth would squeal, feeling his hand on her butt, the sound turning into a moan as he’d swiftly turn her around and crash into her, her back hitting the wall next to the bathroom door. He’d force her lips open with his tongue and kiss her hard, his hands gripping her hips and pulling her against him. He’d do a quick work of their clothes, get her all naked, and put his mouth to her skin. Screw Merle sleeping the party off in the next room.

Daryl swallowed thickly, blinking himself back to reality. She was gone, the doors falling shut behind her with a click. He was supposed to get a grip on himself, act more responsibly, but here he was, barely holding himself back from jumping her bones like some sort of wild animal. Jesus, Dixon, he thought to himself as he made himself move, getting the tea he promised her going.

He busied himself, hitting up the spaghetti he ordered from Eric’s. Well, the diner wasn’t really Eric’s but his brother’s, who passed away a few years back. Their parents didn’t want to have anything to do with it, so Eric started running it, not wanting something his brother loved so much to perish. The spaghetti, though, was from Eric’s private recipe, and it was one of Daryl’s favorite meals. For some reason, he was dying to see if Beth liked it.

More than that, he was actually insane enough to be thinking how he’d like to take her there, to Eric’s diner. Have her meet Aaron, who was spending much more time at that place with his husband than he was in his office. That is, when they weren’t both away on some NGO mission, saving lives and all that shit. Beth would like them, Daryl thought, and there was no world in which they wouldn’t like Beth right back. The problem was, Daryl wasn’t sure if they would like him any longer once they realized what kind of relationship he shared with her, no matter if he kind of saved Eric’s life in the past or not.

The bathroom doors opened and Beth emerged, her outfit catching Daryl’s attention instantly. She wasn’t wearing her own pajama pants, nor the joggers she had on the last time she was here. Her legs were all bare, and she had his t-shirt on. The one he gave her that first night she stayed in his bed. She wasn’t wearing any bra, her nipples peeking at him through the shirt. The sight had him forget all he’d been thinking in the past twenty minutes, his brain short-circuiting and desire flaring again, as if it was never truly gone.

“C’mere, I need ya to try somethin’,” he murmured, clearing his throat. It didn’t help, his voice still sounded way too rough for it to come off as normal.

Beth didn’t seem to notice, though. She smiled and sauntered to him, the edges of his shirt raising slightly as she walked, threatening to expose her underwear. Daryl averted his eyes and brought his attention to the noodles instead. He rolled some on the fork and held it up to her, his cock not twitching in his pants when she leaned in, opening her mouth for him and sliding her lips around the fork slowly, her eyes not leaving his even for a moment. The sound that escaped her as she chewed was so close to a moan, Daryl felt heat pull at the pit of his stomach. He didn’t think about pushing her against the counter and claiming her lips right after she swallowed. Not at all.

“Mhm, Daryl! It’s so good! You made it?” Beth exclaimed, having no idea what predatory thoughts were clouding his mind basically since the moment he saw her entering the garage.

Two days. For two days, he hadn’t managed to think about anything else but the way it felt to have his lips on her. To taste her. To pull all those moans out of her. He kept thinking about doing it again, drawing it out this time.

What Daryl didn’t let himself think about was having her hands on him. About her little admission that she watched some porn, thinking about pleasuring him. About the way it felt to have her slim fingers stroke his cock. To be pressing his finger into her hot, wet pussy at the same time. If he did let himself go into that, he’d be lost, he knew that much.

But who was he kidding? He was already lost.

“Nah, my friend, Eric did. He has a diner not far from here.”

Beth nodded, her eyes glinting happily.

“In that case, we should visit him some day,” she said, as if she was reading his mind.

“Yeah?”

“Yeah, I want to see if it’s just the spaghetti, or is he this good of a cook. I mean, this is just delicious, Daryl.” Beth licked the sauce off her lips, and Daryl almost mewled when she asked sweetly: “More?”

She opened her mouth for him, and Daryl swallowed audibly, before doing what she wanted him to and taking more of that spaghetti on the fork. This time it was even more deliberate, the way she slowly took the food from him, her lips getting red from the sauce again, some of it falling to her chin. 

He reached out, wiped the sauce from her face with his thumb, then brought it to his mouth, sucking it clean. It was hard to miss the look she gave him at that. Heavy. Hot.

Daryl cleared his throat.

“Alright, you eat.” He moved away from her before she could protest. “I’m gonna be right back.”

“Where are you going?”

“Shower.”

He all but slammed the door behind him, the heat crawling under his skin, burning through any sense of restraint. He needed cold water, something to cool his messed-up head before he did something stupid. Like shove that damn shirt up and off her and take her right there against the counter. Beth didn’t need that kind of crap. She needed someone to do right by her, to make her first time good—soft, sweet, something she deserved. She needed someone who could make love to her. But hell, he didn’t know the first thing about that. With him, it was always rough, messy, damn near brutal sometimes. That’s just how he was. How he’d always been. And even now, even with her, he couldn’t seem to shake it. Couldn’t stop his brain from throwing him into all those raw, reckless urges.

Daryl knew he should talk to her about it, make sure she didn’t think she had to do any of this. It didn’t hit him ‘til after he’d already put his mouth on her, after she’d touched him, that maybe Beth thought he expected it. Like just ‘cause he was older, she had to rush things. He knew she wanted him—for some crazy reason—but she needed to know it didn’t gotta happen all at once. She could take her time, set the pace. Didn’t matter how bad he wanted her, how her teasing was driving him half outta his mind.

But he had no idea how to even start this type of conversation.

The cold shower helped a little. He threw a clean shirt and his old grey joggers on and walked out of the bathroom with a resolve to keep things lighter tonight, to maybe even try and talk to her about this. Only, when he walked back into the living room, he found it empty. The tea he made for them was gone too, and the doors to his bedroom were cracked open, her soft humming carrying over to the next room. When it stopped abruptly, Daryl didn’t think anything of it.
He pushed the doors open and spotted her right away, standing next to his cupboard. One of the drawers was open, and Beth was holding something in her hand. Her eyes skimming over it with a strange kind of urgency, as if she was desperately trying to understand something. Daryl was on the verge of asking her what she had there, when it hit him. What he had in that drawer.

He stopped a few steps away from her, gasping. Beth’s eyes snapped up, right to his, and a furious blush spread across her cheeks momentarily.

“Oh, Daryl, I’m so sorry, I didn’t…” She looked at the opened drawer as if she was the one caught doing something wrong, not him. “I wasn’t snooping. I mean, I was, but I just… I was looking for our pics from the Fair, you know? I didn’t…”

“It’s fine,” he interrupted her, his voice rough. He took a step in her direction, half expecting her to flinch back. She didn’t, but he stopped anyway, his gaze dropping to the photos in her hand. It wasn’t fine, not really. He knew what this looked like.

“Why… Why do you have these?” she asked next, and Daryl gulped at how her voice wavered slightly.

No why did you take photos of me, you creep, no have you been following me. Just why do you have these. As if it didn’t even occur to her that he might have been the one taking those photos of her. As if, even with this evidence in hand, Beth didn’t come anywhere near the conclusion that Daryl might be the one hurting those girls after all. That he could hurt her now. It was making his head spin again, this level of trust. Something in his gut squeezed uncomfortably at the thought that he’d have to destroy this in the moment.

“I took ‘em,” he admitted quietly, averting his eyes from her, ashamed, when she turned her gaze up at him again. He didn’t want to see the hurt that probably formed in her eyes now. Didn’t want to see the look the knowledge that he’s been following her put on her face.

He should have thrown them out. Not stashed them deep inside that drawer and forgotten all about them. Wait for someone to find them at the worst possible moment. But it was all too late now. He had to tell her. There was no other option. But how the hell was he supposed to break this particular news to her? That he’s been hiding this from her? He didn’t want to scare her either.

Beth didn’t speak, patiently waiting for him to explain, and as he breathed out a deep sigh and made himself move, it astounded him again that she stayed in her spot. Not stepping back, even when he stopped right in front of her, eyeing the offending printouts.

Beth was there, on each of them. He took only a few before he decided he was feeling like too much of a creep to keep on doing that. One of them, the one she was looking at last, was from the night he took her to his place for the first time. It showed her following her friends to her ex’s house, wearing a white shirt that was going to become see-through a few hours later. Daryl remembered stepping down Carol’s stairs, seeing her there, all wet and miserable. He felt like the biggest asshole when his eyes strayed down to her breasts, to pink, erect nipples poking through her shirt. He only looked at them that once, not letting his eyes fall down to them again that night, but he’s never forgotten how they looked anyway.

Daryl swallowed audibly, shaking his head to get rid of the images. He wouldn’t be surprised if she didn’t want to have anything to do with him after tonight. If she wanted him to take her home or to her friends right after this conversation. The idea that she could never speak to him again made his heart throb in pain. But he couldn’t lie to her. It was one thing to not tell her, not wanting her to be afraid, but Daryl didn’t have it in him to lie to her face.

He licked his lips nervously, his eyes raising to meet her confused stare again. There was no hurt in her eyes yet, but Daryl knew it was going to change in the moment.

“I didn’t wanna do it, but Rick kept goin’ on ‘bout how it’s good detective work or somethin’. Said sometimes you stumble on stuff by accident or... I dunno, whatever,” he shrugged, thinking himself a coward for starting with this instead of from the beginning. He took a calming breath, his heart thudding in his chest loudly as he scanned her face carefully. She was still more confused than anything else, but his girl was smart, and he could see the first signs of understanding dawning on her.

“But… why would you need to…?” She fell silent, her lips pressing into a thin line and her eyes glinting with fear, as if she already knew, even as she asked: “Why me?”

“Wasn’t just you. Me ‘n Rick had Feral Angels’ guys keep eyes on other girls too. All of ‘em under eighteen, young, little things… You were the oldest.”

“The oldest of what, Daryl? I don’t, I don’t understand.” Her voice hitched, bordering on hysterical, and Daryl shook his head.

“You do,” he murmured, but then told her anyway, even if watching the color drain from her face was one of his least favorite sights. “I was watchin’ over ya, ‘cause we thought you might…” be next. “We thought the guy who murdered Sophia might come for ya.”

Beth took in a shuddering breath. For a moment, there was nothing but silence between them, and Daryl readied himself for the inevitable, for her to tell him she couldn’t stay here tonight. For her to say she couldn’t believe he kept this from her.

“So, the whole time, back at the beginning of the year, when I was seeing you everywhere, when we were bumping into each other on the streets… that wasn’t by accident?” Her voice raised at the end of that sentence, her eyes widened and hands shaking where she clasped them around the photos.

Daryl shook his head, dropping his gaze. Not only wasn’t he a good friend, hiding this from her, but apparently he wasn’t too good at this detective job either, if she was seeing him everywhere when he was trying to be stealthy. Good job, Dixon, good fucking job.

“And that night you took me to your place, you knew I was at that party. At Jimmy’s.”

“Yeah, I thought you’d be safe with them and left to see Carol. It was just some dumb luck that I saw you a few hours later...”

Beth nodded, her eyebrows still scrunching in thought.

“So you… you’ve been helping Rick find that guy? All this time?”

“Yeah, failin’ to help him more like,” he murmured, a depreciating sigh escaping his mouth. “We didn’t find nothin’ else on that guy, just the pictures of possible fixations of his. No prints, no nothin’, and the few suspects I had, they were all a dead end, so… that case’s basically dead now too.”

Beth nodded, taking it all in with much more calm than he expected from her. Focused on getting the full picture, instead of freaking out. Not accusing him of anything. He thought she’d start shouting at him, expected her to be mad. Not this. It was making him feel jittery.

She breathed in and out a few times, then nodded again.

“Okay.”

“Okay?” he asked, dumbfounded, and didn’t turn his gaze away from her this time, when she raised her beautiful blue eyes at him. She was still pale, her whole body shaking a little, but she was fighting it, he could tell.

“I mean, it’s not really okay, you know?” She said, making him swallow audibly. Was this when she was going to tell him that she didn’t want to have anything to do with him anymore? Because he wasn’t any better than the creep hurting those girls, following her around, taking pics of her, hiding this whole shit from her and taking advantage of her crush on him? “This monster should be caught. Put on a trial or something. It’s not okay that he… I feel sick thinking about him. Being out there, looking for other victims, all those poor girls he can still hurt… That’s not okay, you know?”

Daryl nodded, even though he wasn’t really sure what she was trying to tell him. It stunned him that she wasn’t leaving. Wasn’t yelling at him or telling him off either.

“But okay, as in, I get it why you didn’t tell me.” Daryl scrunched his eyebrows now, even more surprised, his breath catching in his chest. “It’s… I have goosebumps just thinking about it now, this creep watching me, taking some photos of me. Ugh, it’s disgusting. I don’t think I would’ve slept peacefully even one night all those months if I’d known."

Daryl grunted, not really knowing what to say to that, how to comfort her. 

Beth was twisting her face in disgust, a fiery, angry look in her eyes, even as she still shivered, but when she blinked at him next, something shifted on her face. Something vulnerable emerged from beneath all her rage and defiance. Her shoulders sagged just a bit, and her voice, when it came, was quieter, almost trembling.

“Could you just…” She dropped the photos back in the drawer, her eyes not leaving his as she asked, “Could you hug me now, please?"

It wasn’t like her, to ask instead of just doing what she wanted, but he wasn’t going to question her in that moment. Not even if he didn’t understand how she could just glaze over the fact that he hid this from her. How she could be so fine with him watching her for months like this.

Daryl shifted closer anyway, and the second his hands landed on her shoulders, Beth all but collapsed into him. He wrapped his arms around her, one hand cradling the back of her head against his chest, the other pulling her in tight. Her grip on him was just as fierce, her breath steadying as she buried herself against him.

Daryl laid a delicate kiss on the top of her head, his heartbeat still wild, but his brain slowly catching up with the fact that she wasn’t pushing him away, didn’t want him gone from her life. If anything, she held on tighter.

“Daryl,” she mumbled into his chest, her voice barely above a whisper.

“Yeah,” he grunted, his chin brushing her hair.

“Do you think… am I in danger?”

He shook his head automatically, but deep down, he couldn’t be sure. Not really. The thought gnawed at him, and he swallowed hard, hoping that whoever might’ve been watching her—if there was someone—thought twice when they saw who she was with. He had to believe that his reputation, the way people talked about him, might work for once in his favor. That it’d keep any bastard with bad intentions far the hell away from her.

“I dunno, probably not,” he muttered finally, his voice low against her hair. “But anyone tries somethin’? They’re dead.”

Beth shivered against him, and held onto him even more tightly. He pressed his nose into her hair, breathing her in. He could still smell her shampoo and her natural scent underneath it, but it was mixed with his body wash now, his own smell clinging to her skin. It had the same effect on him that seeing the imprint of his hand on her skin had. Dizzying. Arousing. It was the last thing he should be feeling in this moment.

“I’m sorry,” he murmured, guilt clawing at him. He felt it for everything—her finding out like this, for the sleepless nights it was bound to cause. She was leaving for college in just over a week, and while the thought of her being further away from him twisted his gut, he couldn’t deny a part of him was glad. Distance might keep her safe from that bastard.

“For what?” Beth’s voice softened, the anxiety this whole conversation had caused starting to drain away.

He shrugged, unable to meet her eyes, but when she moved her head back to look at him, he couldn’t avoid her. Her gaze was steady now, almost collected, as she studied him.

“Daryl, you’ve got nothing to be sorry for.”

He clenched his jaw. There were plenty of things he could be sorry for. Plenty of things he was sorry for. They were hitting him all at once now.

“I didn’t tell ya. I was watchin’ you behind your back. Took those damn pictures of ya…”

The list didn’t stop there. It stretched far beyond this moment — like the way he avoided important conversations with her, how he let things happen between them when he shouldn’t have. How he couldn’t keep his damn hands off her, rushing into things she might not be ready for. He was sorry he hadn’t caught the killer. That she was afraid now. That on top of this thing between them being inappropriate, there was the very real possibility of people thinking he was not only taking advantage, but planning to murder her in cold blood.

And then, he was also sorry he wasn’t younger. Better. More decent. A man from the kind of family she could take home without having to lie. Instead, she had to sneak around, blackmail her brother, all just to keep seeing him.

And further back still — he was sorry for being who he was. A Dixon. He knew she’d forgiven him for the way he acted back when he was fighting this thing between them, for the way he shouted at her and called her names. He knew she understood, at least partly. But it didn’t make him feel any less unworthy. Hell, if anything, it scared him. Every time his temper flared, he saw shades of his old man staring back at him. He’d been just a kid back then, but the memories still haunted him: Will Dixon cussing his mom out over nothing, throwing tantrums that shook the thin trailer walls. Daryl didn’t remember everything — just flashes, enough to know he’d seen too much.

Watch and learn, boy. This is how you fuck a woman.

Daryl’s stomach turned. He didn’t have the images, not clear ones, but the words were enough. The noises. The sound of the table bouncing, his mom’s screams, the crude laughter that sounded too much like Merle’s.

He swallowed hard, his throat dry as the thought crept back in — the way he sometimes caught himself thinking about Beth. Thinking about pinning her against furniture, walls, whatever was close. The way that need clawed at him, raw and overwhelming, like he wanted to lose himself in her completely. Blood rushed south just from the memory of those thoughts, and he wondered, not for the first time: What if he was more like his old man than he’d ever let himself believe?

But then Beth spoke, cutting through the storm in his head.

“Yeah, because you were looking out for me,” she said, her voice steady now, her hands warm where they cradled his face.

He exhaled sharply, the tension in his chest easing just a little. Her touch, so gentle, pulled at something deep inside him, loosening the knot he didn’t even realize had formed there. Goddamnit, he’d never forgive himself if he hurt her. He’d chop his own hand off before he let that happen. At least that was one thing that separated him completely from his father.

She pressed their foreheads together, her breath mingling with his. He closed his eyes for a second, letting himself feel it—her warmth, her trust, her presence.

“I mean, it’s a bit of a hit to my ego,” she teased, her tone lighter now, “knowing you weren’t just hanging around ‘cause of my charm or good looks, but…”

She trailed off, and he snorted.

“Mhm, right. Stalkin’. Can’t imagine nothin’ more romantic,” he muttered, his voice dipping into that dry, sarcastic tone that always seemed to make her laugh. She did now, the sound bubbling out of her and breaking through the last of his tension.

There were so many things he was sorry for, so many reasons to feel guilty. They would come back, just like the bad memories, chasing him down when he least expected it.

But right now, listening to her laugh, Daryl let himself feel something else again. The same thing he felt humming under his skin every time she as much as looked his way. The same thing that had him smiling like a madman every day since their first date, and even way before that, during every single meeting with her. He was going through motions, he knew, balancing between feeling guilty about this and being too happy to care.

“Well, you don’t do romantic, or so I’ve heard,” she teased, her voice sweet as her lips stretched into a full smile. “Unless... you’ve changed your mind?”

There was a glint in her eyes, like she’d used those words on purpose. It sparked a memory, her question from the Ferris wheel looping through his head.

What changed your mind?

You. Goddammit. What else?

He didn’t answer her, but she didn’t wait for one either. Standing on her tiptoes, she brought her lips to his at the exact moment he leaned in to kiss her. It was different this time—slower, softer—but just as deep. And once again, he couldn’t believe she was still here. Still not running. Even though he’d given her reasons to. Twice in the last seven days.

The kiss turned into something more heated when Beth deepened it, her tongue brushing against his lips before slipping past them. A strangled noise erupted from the back of his throat when she took his lower lip between hers for a brief moment, pulling lightly, just as her hands gripped his shoulders hard. The way she crushed into him with fervent need left no room for hesitation, and Daryl forgot about all his insecurities, all the anxiety that their physicality caused in him in the last two days, leaving him at once. He let the feelings she evoked in him consume him again, just like he did back at the garage. Just like he did in the woods two days back.

The force of her passion made him take a step back as she pressed herself firmly against him, her fingers threading through his hair with a possessive fervor. His hands latched onto her—one gripping her ponytail, the other sliding down her back. Daryl held her tightly, but it was Beth who walked him to the bed, the back of his legs hitting the hard wood unexpectedly. Daryl went down, the mattress dipping beneath him, and he only managed to blink at her once before she climbed onto his lap, straddling him.

Daryl moved up the bed slightly, her moving with him. Once she settled herself over him again, Daryl took in the way she looked—her naked thighs bracketing his, her nipples poking through the shirt that had fallen off one of her shoulders, and then her pretty face, flushed, lips well-kissed, and eyes half-lidded. Just looking at her made him hard and throbbing in his pants, and he gulped.

Jesus Christ.

Her hands framed his face, eyes locked on his like she was searching for something—reassurance, maybe. He pushed a long, drawn-out breath out as she leaned in, their noses touching. He was barely aware of his hands slipping down to grab her hips. It was as if time stopped for a second as they stared at each other, their breaths mingling as she slowly closed the space between them again. She kissed him deeply before descending lower, catching his jaw, then letting her lips fall to his neck. Daryl bit his lip, holding back a wrecked sound that wanted to escape when she nibbled at his skin there. A pleasurable kind of pain shot through him, and he buckled into her, desperately seeking friction. Gasping at the contact, Beth pushed herself more into him, thrusting her hips down into his cock just as she closed her lips around his skin again. The material of her panties was thin and as she rubbed herself against him, he felt the heat of her so well, almost as if she was already bare. He rounded her ass with his hands, pushing his fingers under the material, feeling her soft skin beneath his touch, marveling again at how good she felt against him. Damn, he should talk to her first, shouldn’t he?

"Beth." His voice came out rough, breathless, and she shivered against him at the sound. "Wait, just… hold on—"

“Don’t,” she cut him off, her voice urgent, trembling. “Please, Daryl. No more talking about the bad stuff. I—I’ve been thinking about this. What we did last time.” She bit her lip, her words rushed and raw. “I need you. Please, Daryl. Can we… can you…”

Her voice trailed off, her cheeks flushed as her wide, pleading eyes locked on his. She struggled to put the rest into words, and he swallowed hard, his chest tightening. Hell, if he could say no to her now.

“You don’t gotta plead, girl,” he muttered, his tone low and gravelly, then swallowed audibly, when she rubbed herself against him again. “It’s all up to you. Just say the word.”

Daryl took her face in his hands, his thumb stroking her cheek gently, then brought her face down to yet again lay kisses all across her skin, starting with her cheek. She giggled when he kissed her nose, the light caress soothing her in a way he would never imagine himself capable of. 

"Touch me again?” Beth breathed out when he kissed the corner of her mouth, then she followed his lips, kissing him, before adding a quiet: “Just like the last time?" It sounded like a question, but she didn’t leave him any room to answer.

Her lips found his in another feverish kiss and Daryl almost didn't think about it, before he pushed her hips into himself at just the right angle, hard enough for him to catch onto her pussy even through their clothes. They both moaned into the kiss, and then she was throwing her head back, another beautiful sound escaping her as he pressed his fingers into her clit through her panties. She was so wet, he could feel it through the material.

"Oh my God, Daryl, yes!" She was loud, louder than in the woods, and Daryl could feel himself throbbing again at the sight and sounds she made. He grabbed at her ponytail and brought her face down, crushing their lips together just as he pushed his fingers under the material of her panties. 

Notes:

Oops, sorry for the cliffhanger! But since it's the holiday season and I’ve managed to get my life back on track, I’ll post the next one this week. ;)

EDIT:
Also, I feel kinda bad for making Daryl feel like Beth was going to leave him again/feel like crap over the way he wants her again. We were much more in happy territory in the last chapter, but I feel like, even when happy, he'd constantly expect the other shoe to drop—at least for some time.

Chapter 27: I’m going to tell you tomorrow, okay?

Summary:

Beth spends another night at Daryl's, and things get even more heated between them.

Notes:

I'm just gonna say... this chapter (and a few others, lol) is why the tag 'shameless smut' was added to this story. Enjoy! <3

Since you all told me the smut bits were great last time, I'll try not to worry about it this time xD
I'm going to admit, though — writing this chapter was a journey.
I'm learning so many 'useful' words in English thanks to this story lol
And I just love editing it, writing it - the whole thing - and you all reading it and loving it warms my heart.
Ahh, it's all so satisfying to be putting words out there in the world, you know?
I just wanted to say thank you - again I guess - for being so lovely in the comments section and inspiring me to make this not-so-little fic I started (and then abandoned at 20 chapters) 9 years ago even better and longer <3
You guys are amazing <3

Sorry for the rambling.
I got sick over Christmas and I'm pretty sure I have a fever now, so don't mind me XD

 

P.S. The song that Beth sings here is another one of Emily Kinney's—this time it's "Over Anticipate." :) ]
I do not own the rights to it or the lyrics, and I didn't write it.
It's included here because, like I said before, I love incorporating Emily Kinney's songs into the world of TWD, and I think some of her lyrics work great for Daryl and Beth. ^^

Hope you all had a peaceful and lovely Christmas/Holiday with your family or friends <3
And if this is a hard time for any of you, I'm sending you even more love and hugs!
You're awesome, always keep fighting!

***

Beth moaned into the kiss, the urgency with which Daryl pushed his hand down her panties making her shiver. It seemed like he was just as desperate to feel her, to touch her, as she was for him, and the idea of it — of him wanting her this much — filled her with a raw, undeniable need that bordered on overwhelming. It was as thrilling as it was dangerous, the thought that overcame her in that moment: that she’d let him do anything to her, anything he wanted, if it only meant that he’d keep craving her like this.

His fingers slid down and up her wet clit slowly, almost too softly, teasing her in a way that left her squirming from pleasure. She’d been touching herself for weeks, imagining his fingers instead of hers, but her fantasies could never compare to this: to the weight of his arm as he pushed her head down to claim her mouth, to the sweet press of his body against hers — his chest hard against hers, one leg sliding in between hers, the other bracketing her — to the feeling of his calloused fingers rubbing into her with intent, his hold on her both firm and delicate. As if he was still ready to let her go the second she showed any signs of discomfort.

This man, always so gentle, always so thoughtful, even when he pretended not to be — God, she loved him. And no, her fantasies had nothing on the real thing, Beth decided.

She felt Daryl spread his two fingers slightly, softly pinching her clitoral hood, then tugging up and down, drawing a long, unexpected moan out of her. She could feel herself getting wetter, her pussy clutching from pleasure.

“God, Daryl,” she mumbled into his mouth, awed, and he grunted before repeating the motion. Beth shivered against him and drew back a little to look at him, at his well-kissed lips and hooded eyes. They were both breathing heavily, and when she moaned again, his finger circling her now, rubbing into her in a way that made her toes curl, a desperate, low sound left him as well.

Daryl brought her back down and latched onto her neck, his mouth leaving a trail of wet kisses on her skin, down to her collarbones, where the material of the shirt stopped him from descending lower. His fingers moved faster now, massaging into her clit with a newfound desperation, and Beth felt her orgasm building, the heat curling in the pit of her stomach. Then, suddenly, his fingers were gone. Beth whined at the loss.

“No, please, Daryl,”

Her voice came out strangled, not like hers at all. She didn’t manage to say anything else, because suddenly he was flipping them, her back hitting the mattress. The sudden change in their position left her breathless. Daryl crushed their mouths together in a heated, dirty kiss, his tongue relentless in its exploration of her mouth. Then he rasped — the sound of his voice alone almost making her come:

“I wanna eat ya, girl.”

She was nodding feverishly even before his words fully registered.

“Yeah, yes, please.”

Daryl moved down her body, his hands coming down on her waist, lifting the shirt up her tummy as he eyed her red panties. The ones he’d already seen in one of the photos she’d sent him. He leaned over her, his lips touching the skin of her tummy, but instead of going down, he started kissing up her skin, leaving her waiting. Her pussy was pulsating now, the need to have him touch her even more overwhelming. She couldn’t help but whine, “Daryl, please.”

He stopped to look up at her, and Beth swallowed audibly, seeing his dark eyes gazing up at her from this position.

“Can I?” he asked then, his voice barely above a whisper as he indicated her still-clad chest with his chin. He had his hands under her boobs now, the shirt rolled up, and it astounded her that he stopped to ask, even though, not a moment later, he’d had his hand down her panties. She couldn’t help but giggle, even as she nodded her head.

“Yes, Mr. Dixon,” she drawled and giggled again at the way his jaw set, his stare turning into a glare at being called that. He pushed the shirt up and cupped one tit, while he brought his mouth to the other without any more hesitation, and Beth’s giggle caught in her throat. She moaned, her pussy clenching again, when Daryl’s fingers pulled on her nipple lightly. A quick pain shot through her, followed by a wave of pleasure the moment his lips replaced his fingers, his tongue gentle and pleasant on her skin.

Daryl was making little sounds while kissing her skin, soft little grunts of pleasure that she didn’t think he was aware of. They were driving her mad. She didn’t even notice the moment he snaked one of his hands down again — not before he pushed his fingers between her pussy’s lips again. He sucked on her nipple hard, his fingers stroking her clit faster now. Beth arched her back into him, a violent shudder going through her at the touch, her pussy clenching around him, and a wrecked sound escaping her as her orgasm hit her suddenly.

"Oh, Daryl!" His name tore itself out of her throat.

She fisted her fingers in his hair, her other hand grabbing desperately at his shoulder, needing something to hold onto.

Daryl surged forward, effectively cutting her loud moans with his lips, and they kissed while she was still coming down from it.

“Oh, oh my God, Daryl,” she breathed out, her chest heaving and legs shaking when he left her lips to kiss her jaw, then her neck. Her whole body was humming, her skin heated up, her brain on another plane of existence completely. Daryl began leaving a trail of kisses down her tummy, his hands gripping her thighs, gently pulling them apart again—she was only half aware of it.

In a haze, she looked down to watch Daryl mouth at the underside of her thigh. God, did he look hot in between her legs. Beth wanted to have this sight burned into her mind.

His eyes—dark and full of awe, like she was the most precious thing he'd ever seen—never left hers as his lips left her skin, his fingers skimming over her panties. He raised his head, his tongue coming up to wet his lips as he let his fingers slip under the hem, close to the thigh he'd just kissed. Beth gulped, her whole body jerking when he leaned in again, bringing his mouth to her pussy’s lips, to where he pushed the material aside. Beth couldn’t help but moan again, feeling his wet, warm tongue press in between her lips to taste her. It was somehow even better than what he did with his fingers, and Beth couldn’t help but wonder how it would feel to have his hot, heavy erection pressed there instead. To have him rub himself against her without all those stupid clothes getting in the way.

Daryl pushed his tongue down her clit, licking into her, and when he pushed the tip of his tongue into her wet, hot entrance, Beth whined so loudly she had to cover her own mouth in shame. She felt the heat building inside her again. This time, however, a new, overpowering need emerged with it, and Beth felt her whole body flushing at the realization that she was seconds away from begging him to stop, to fill her with his cock instead.

She knew she wanted his hands, his tongue on her body, and she was well aware that this desire for him was going to lead there sooner or later. But it was never so clear in her head; she never consciously thought that she wanted him inside her until now. And now that she did, it was hard to ignore this need.

Daryl made a desperate little sound in response to hers, kissing into her with even more fervor, before sliding his tongue down to tease her entrance again.

“Oh, Daryl, yes, yes, please!” she mumbled, barely aware of anything but the heat pooling between her legs, the tension building inside her. And then, when he pushed his tongue inside her again, it all snapped. Her thighs fell shut on their own volition, trapping him in between, as an orgasm, like a shockwave, rippled through her whole body. Beth was vaguely aware of the sounds she made — loud, unrestrained, closer to sobbing now as she just kept coming — and yet, she still wanted, still felt that raw, almost painful need for him to fill her.

“Oh, Daryl,” she whined, making her shaky legs move so that he could take a breath. She raised herself on her elbows to look at him, to say sorry for squeezing his head like that, and stopped, seeing him there, still a breath away from her hot entrance, watching her pussy with an almost awestruck look on his face. Beth felt herself blush, and all she could do when he dived back in, licking her juices out of her, was drop her head back down and moan again. She was all tingly now, sensitive in an entirely new way, and something told her that it could become all too much, all too quickly. But it seemed that Daryl was aware of that somehow. He was swiping his tongue around her clit slowly and oh so gently, it made her toes curl in the best way.

The thought persisted, though: she wanted him inside her. No matter that, from how much she’d seen of him, she doubted he could ever fit.

Daryl stopped abruptly, and Beth would oppose — she really would — only she was too caught up in her sudden longing, and the only thing she could do was stare at him, her breath coming in short and quick. He raised his eyes, taking in the soft expanse of her tummy, her heaving chest, perky nipples, and flushed face. When their eyes finally met, after what seemed like an eternity of him just drinking her in, the look he gave her was so intense, so full of slow, burning heat, Beth almost whined at the sight.

“Can I take ’em off?” Daryl rasped, his fingers pulling gently on the material of her panties, and Beth swallowed, looking down at herself, at how exposed she already was to him with the shirt rolled up above her boobs and the partially see-through red panties adorned with little hearts being the only other piece of clothing she had on.

But that’s what she wanted, right? When she pulled his shirt from the rag in the bathroom and decided against wearing any pants or a bra. She wanted there to be as little clothing as possible between her body and his. Not that Daryl got the memo. He was still in his t-shirt and joggers, his body mostly shielded from her eyes.

“Will you take off yours too?” she asked, blushing at her own straightforward words. Daryl bit into the inside of his cheek, nervous, before shaking his head at her.

“Why not? Ain’t fair for you to be wearin’ all these darn clothes when I’m basically naked here.”

Daryl snorted, his lip trembling slightly as if he was holding back a smile. He was a sight — wet from her juices, with tousled hair and a flushed face. Even though he was the one pleasuring her, he looked just as blissed out, as if he was getting off on touching her, so unlike all the boys in all the stories she’d heard from cheerleaders.

“Girl,” he murmured, a half-serious warning in his voice, and Beth shivered under his gaze.

“What?” she asked, playing stupid, and Daryl shook his head at her again.

“Can’t have both of us naked,” Daryl muttered finally, letting go of her panties to move up and lean over her again, seeking her lips, as if he simply had to be touching her one way or another. He kissed her deeply, and she tasted herself on his tongue, the kiss dirtier, more raw than the other ones. Her whole body was tingly and alive, almost like an exposed wire, too sensitive and ready to ignite at the smallest hint of heat. Daryl moved slightly back, his nose nuzzling into hers as he rasped: “Ain’t safe.”

Their eyes met again, and Beth reached out to stroke his cheek, a small, playful smile appearing on her face. He was leaning over her but angling his hips away from her, as if even now, even with her in his bed, so willing and in love with him, he was still fighting himself on it. Holding back on her.

“And what’s so unsafe about that?” she teased, dragging her hand down his chest, feeling the taut muscles underneath his shirt and wondering why on Earth he wouldn’t just let her see already.

Daryl’s breath hitched, and he gazed down in time to see her press her hand against his bulge.

“Beth,” he breathed out, a soft noise escaping him when she spread her fingers on him, massaging him through the material. He was hard and heavy in her hand, and Beth found herself wanting to make him feel just as good as he did her.

“Daryl,” she muttered, and something in her tone made him look up, his eyes finding hers. “Get out of those pants. Now.”

She could swear she saw his eyes darken in real time at the way she addressed him, and Beth wondered suddenly if any woman had ever spoken to him that way. She hoped not.

He pressed his lips into hers in a bruising kind of kiss and then rasped, his lip quivering in an almost-smile:

“Yes, ma’am.”

He moved back then, quickly, as if he needed to do this before he lost his resolve, his hands flying to his waist and pulling the pants down his legs. There was nothing graceful about this, and as he struggled to free his legs from the material, Beth had to hold back a laugh.

She watched him, resting on her elbows, as he discarded his joggers next to the bed, leaving himself in the wifebeater shirt and black boxer briefs.

“Shut up,” he mumbled, seeing her little smile, as he moved up the bed again — this time, though, lying on his side next to her. Her words had spurred him into action, but now that he was here, he seemed unsure — a stark contrast to the way he’d sought to pleasure her not that long ago.

“I’m not saying anything,” she said sweetly, turning to face him. She slid her hand to his waist and pushed herself into his space again.

Daryl dropped his gaze to her body, his eyes raking over her chest, where his shirt fell down slightly, covering her breasts but leaving her tummy exposed, and lower to watch her slowly hook her leg over his. Daryl caught her thigh when she was moving it up his leg and over his hip, his touch firm but still gentle. His fingers traveled up to grab at her ass, and she watched him swallow tightly, then gasp a little as she pressed herself flush against him, feeling his cock thrust into her pussy through their underwear.

Beth let a soft sound escape her as well, her heart racing and head reeling from their activities.

What if we do this tonight? she thought to herself, her whole body vibrating with need. It felt like any rationality, any insecurities, and worries went out of the window the moment he put his hands on her, and now all she wanted was for it to continue. For this fire burning inside her loins to be finally satisfied, to let the aching need consuming her find its release.

She moved, thrusting herself into him again and moaning at the contact, at the feel of him without the barrier of their pants. She lost herself in this feeling, pushing her hips into his a bit chaotically but with unmatched desperation as she tried to get the angle just right, to have him press into her entrance through the barrier of their underwear again.

Daryl snapped his head up, found her lips — just like she was dying for him to do — and started kissing her again, soft sounds leaving him with each of her little thrusts. One of his hands, half trapped underneath her, was grabbing at her head, pushing her down and even more into his feverish kiss. The other roamed her back a few times before settling back on her hip, where she was meeting him, his fingers digging into her skin as if he wanted to ground himself.

Beth could feel the fast thrumming of his heart under her fingers as she pressed them against his chest. It was beating just as wildly as hers when she pushed into his chest, making him fall to his back. He took her with him, not letting their bodies separate even for a hot second. She kept herself close, their chests pressed together, and lips finding lips right after they settled in this new position.

“Beth,” Daryl uttered, his voice breaking slightly when they parted, their hot breaths mingling.

Beth opened her eyes to find him watching her, his eyes consuming her. She thrust herself into him, a moan escaping her as the sensation intensified, made even more electric by the way his eyes were fixed on her. Daryl let out a quiet whine, forcing her hips still before she could move again. It was only then, when he pressed her down onto himself hard, his cock pulsing against her, that she realized how affected he was by her movements.

“Stop,” he grunted out, his pupils dilated, eyes dark and heavy on her face as he cradled her cheek with one of his hands. “Just… slow down a bit.”

Beth bit her lip, her gaze dropping to his chest as it heaved, mirroring the way hers did when he touched her. Daryl seemed close too, but she didn’t want him to come like that — in his underwear, untouched by her. No, she wanted to make him feel as good as he made her feel. Wanted to take care of him. Wanted to have him in her hands again. See him cumming all over her this time, if not inside her.

She swallowed hard, her gaze returning to his, her breath hitching in her throat.

“I don’t wanna slow down,” she whispered, earning herself one of those arousing little groans of his. “I want to make you feel good. Okay?”

“Beth,” He started to protest, but when she pushed back against his hold, he surprisingly let her go. His heavy, dark eyes followed her movements as she slid down his legs, matching his gaze. Daryl bit his lip, his hands twitching at his sides, as if he wasn’t sure what to do with them now that he couldn’t put them on her. Then he murmured, his voice shaky: “Yeah, okay.”

He finally settled on resting one hand behind his head, while he pressed the fingers of the other—quite predictably—against his lips, all nervous now, as if he were the one with no experience, not her. Adorable, Beth thought, her heart warming at the sight.

How she could ever think giving it up to the likes of Jimmy was a good idea when this man existed was beyond her now, and she was glad she ran into the night instead of silently suffering through the whole ordeal. She remembered feeling ashamed of it, hating herself for being such a stupid kid, for not understanding why all of her peers were so obsessed with sex. She felt so disgusted, so appalled when Jimmy touched her, she thought something must have been wrong with her. But look at her now—trembling with excitement at the prospect of undressing Daryl, dying to be touched by him, her mouth literally watering at the thought of touching him. Turns out all it took was the right person.

Beth blushed, shaking her head at herself for thinking about all that sentimental stuff while hovering over Daryl’s dick. She raised her eyes to Daryl and found him watching her. He was scanning her face, apparently coming to all the wrong conclusions. The next thing that left his mouth was a silent, rough rasp:

“Don’t have to do that.”

“I want to. I just…” Beth’s voice caught in her throat. I love you, darn it, but it’s not like I can tell you now when I’m about to give you a hand job, right? No, it has to be romantic, but why doesn't any moment feel like it's right?

She shook her head again and ignored the doubtful look he was sending her, dropping her eyes to his bulge. She slid her hand up his length, feeling him through the material, her breath catching when his hips snapped up at the first contact.

“Sorry,” he murmured, and Beth bit her lip, hearing his voice crack.

Beth's fingers grazed the hem of his boxer briefs, and she glanced up at him, meeting his heated gaze. The intensity of it thrilled her, arousing her in a way she hadn’t expected. The fact that he was struggling to stay still, his voice rough and uneven, only made it more intoxicating.  And to think, it was all because she had simply decided to put her hands on him.

Beth pulled the material down, and Daryl raised his hips a little to make it easier for her to slide them down, freeing his whole length. She blushed, taking him in fully for the first time — all red and veiny, sitting heavily against Daryl’s abdomen.

She’d seen a little of him in the woods, but it was all happening in such a frenzy, most of him still tucked into his pants as she stroked him, Beth couldn’t take a proper look. It’s definitely too big, she thought now, a little terrified, even as something hot tugged at her guts. He’s never gonna fit in me. She barely held herself from uttering it out loud but swallowed the words back.

Beth reached for him, her fingers skimming over the leaking head of his cock. Daryl’s breath hitched, and she glanced up to find his eyes fixed on her fingers, watching as she coated them in his pre-cum. His hips twitched lightly when she finally took him in hand and gave him the first stroke, spreading the wetness across his shaft. The way he bit down on his finger, a soft sound escaping him as if against his will, sent a thrill through her.

God, yes... Let go, Daryl Dixon. Lose control for me.

She didn’t really think about it as she looked down at his cock, seeing even more pre-come leaking out of him, his cock pulsing in her hand. She just leaned forward — no thoughts, just this overwhelming desire — as she brushed her lips softly against the head of his cock, feeling the warmth of his skin and tasting him for the first time.

“Fuck, Beth,” Daryl let out a desperate, almost strangled sound, followed by a low groan as she closed her lips around his tip, and it would be enough to chase away any hesitation. But she didn't feel any.

Beth brought her lips up and off him, then lowered her head, curious, her tongue darting out to lick the base of his cock and then run up his shaft. Daryl’s breath hitched above her, and another wrecked sound escaped him, almost bordering on sounding painful this time.

She flicked her gaze up to meet his, catching his expression — completely captivated, awestruck even, jaw tense, lips parted, and eyes blazing with need—and a shiver ran through her as his gaze darkened, watching her open her mouth and slide her lips around his head again. Slowly, she descended lower, feeling the weight of him on her tongue, then back up again, in a motion similar to the one she was making with her hand. Her movements were uncertain at first but grew bolder at the sound of desperate little groans that kept escaping him as if against his will. She tried going lower and lower with each bow of her head, and it seemed to be driving him nuts, his hand twisting in the sheets right next to his hip and his whole body almost vibrating with the need to move. She could feel it.

“Jesus fucking Christ, Beth,” Daryl croaked as she took his cock as far as she felt possible, then moved her head up again, her tongue tracing over him as she found a slow, steady rhythm. Each soft, unrestrained sound that left him spurred her to take him faster, tears forming in her eyes as she strained her throat. His hand came up to cradle her face, his fingers warm on her cheeks, and Beth pulled back, her voice coming all throaty and hoarse as she uttered:

“And? How am I doin’?”

It was the kind of question she asked him a lot during their training sessions, and the only answer she’d usually get was a grunt and a “keep on goin’” or a simple "fine", but now Daryl seemed too out of breath to even grunt at her. He made a sound, though, akin to sobbing, and then moved his hand from her cheek to her hair, fingers threading gently through the strands as he pulled her up to crush his lips against hers. Beth let out a surprised but pleased sound at the desperate way he held onto her.

“Oh, hell, you’re doin’ so good, girl,” he gritted out hoarsely when he pulled back, his dark, intense eyes finding hers. “So fuckin’ good.”

The praise made her moan in pleasure, her pussy clenching so suddenly it made her feel dizzy. She kissed him hard, her hand coming up to push his chest down again, to have him lay down again so she could go back to what she was doing.

Daryl didn’t let go of her hair, and she could feel the tension radiating from his grip as she descended down his body again. She pushed his shirt up his chest this time, her mouth coming down to seek his skin, laying soft kisses down his chest and past his belly button to where his happy trail started.

His cock stood proudly, waiting for her, and Beth felt Daryl’s fingers twitch in her hair, a soft, quiet moan leaving him as she took him in her mouth again, sucking on his head and simply hoping that she was doing it right. As she started moving her lips up and down his shaft again, Daryl’s breathing grew uneven, each quiet gasp and shudder betraying the depth of his restraint. She couldn’t help the warm satisfaction that filled her at being the cause of it, at being good enough the first time to make him feel like that. Beth felt all the subtle shifts in his body — his thigh muscles tensing, his hand tightening just slightly, and his low groans growing hoarser, more raw with each passing second.

When she looked up, his eyes met hers again, and the heat in his gaze was so intense that it made her heart pound, her cheeks flushing under the intensity of it. His hips buckled suddenly, his resolve withering, and his cock slid even further down her throat, making her gag. The growl that escaped him when he hit the back of her throat made heat uncoil inside her, and suddenly she understood why Daryl was making all those noises when he was eating her out. A soft sound left her at the sudden burst of pleasure that shot through her at the notion that she was making him come undone under her like this, her pussy clenching again, surprising the hell out of her. 

“Ugh, sorry, so—”

Daryl moved, trying to pull her off him, but she didn’t let him. Beth sent him a stern look, then sucked on him with renewed fervor, taking him in even deeper. She forced her free hand down between her clasped thighs and pressed her fingers into herself, soothing the sudden, overwhelming ache. It only grew bigger, though, when Daryl moaned — this time loudly — as if he couldn’t keep himself quiet anymore. His hips buckled again, her eyes watering, and her throat closed around him as he pushed himself too deep.

“Agh, stop, Beth,” he pleaded with her suddenly, even as his hips shot up again, his grip tightening in her hair. "Fuck... Beth, stop!" Daryl’s chest rose and fell heavily, his hand shifting from her hair down to grab onto her face. He forced her up and off his cock, grabbing himself with his other hand to shield her from his cum. Not soon enough. She felt his warm sperm hit her lips, her cheeks, some of it hitting her neck and running down her shirt. Beth licked her lips, tasting him, before looking up to find him staring at her with the most wretched expression she’d ever seen. His chest was heaving, breath coming in short, pupils still dilated, and it surprised her to find him looking so miserable.

“Daryl, are you okay?”

He shook his head, swallowing hard, before speaking:

“I’m so… sorry.”

Sorry? What are you sorry for, she thought, suddenly scared that she’d done something wrong after all. But then he brought his hand down from her hair, to swipe his finger through her cheeks, gathering the liquid on his finger so gently, so apologetically, she suddenly knew, even before he said:

“I didn’t want to get it all on ya like that," he was still breathing hard, words coming out in shaky bursts as he ran his fingers across her face. "But you didn’t stop, and I just, I couldn’t…”

Daryl fell silent, her actions cutting the rest of his words off as she took his hand into hers, eyeing his fingers, before slowly sliding her lips around the ones coated with his sperm. Beth sucked them clean, one by one, looking right at Daryl, and as he watched her do that, slowly the expression on his face shifted, that miserable look disappearing under the heaviness of his lust.

“You didn’t need to do that,” she uttered softly, her voice still rough, when she pulled his digit out of her mouth with a loud pop. “I wanted to taste you.”

Daryl’s breath hitched again, a sound close to a sob escaping him as he rushed to kiss her, his tongue replacing his finger in her mouth. He kissed her almost feverishly, all desperate and filthy, pulling her to lay down with him again, and Beth felt proud of herself for making him this delirious with lust. It was truly something, to render Daryl Dixon, the badass rough biker, speechless, and Beth had done much more than that.

"Jesus... you’re drivin' me crazy," he murmured against her lips, breathless and shaken.

She smiled softly, her voice a teasing whisper as she kissed his jaw, then descended lower. "Don’t worry," she whispered, her lips pressed to his neck as she nibbled and licked at his skin, hoping to leave a hickey, before murmuring in his ear, "I’m just gettin’ started."

Daryl groaned, the sound low and filled with heat, and she couldn’t help but smile, her heart racing. He laid down on his side, pulling her close, his lips meeting hers in another kiss. She melted into him, her body pressing against his as they stayed like that for a moment longer, the warmth from his body wrapping around her like a blanket.

It was as if the world had quieted, leaving only the rhythm of their breath, and in the stillness, she felt her heart swell. It was then, almost like a soft echo in the back of her mind, that she began to hum a gentle tune.

Could you fall in love with me?
Oh, oh
Love is such a mind-blowing mistery

Beth smiled, the lyrics she wrote the day after he kissed her at their clearing making their way into her head as she watched Daryl fall on his back with a long, drawn-out breath. He seemed blissed out now, the way he should’ve been right off the bat, and Beth smiled, lying back as well, her body still shimmering, vibrating from all the emotions being with him brought. They lay in silence for a moment, just breathing, calming down, both lost in their thoughts, until Beth shivered lightly, the cold suddenly getting to her now that he wasn’t embracing her.

She could’ve sworn Daryl wasn’t looking at her, but suddenly, he was in her space again, his hand on her waist, pulling her toward him. Goddamn mind reader, she thought, amused, letting him turn her to the side. She stopped just before reaching his warm arms, scrunching her nose at how her shirt clung to her as she moved. An unhappy groan escaped her before she could stop herself.

“What is it?” he asked, pulling back to look at her.

“Don’t feel bad about it or anythin’,” she muttered, licking her lips nervously, a blush creeping to her cheeks. “But I think I’ll need another shower. Some of it went down my boobs, and now I’m all sticky.”

Daryl’s eyes snapped down, as if he could see through the shirt. Then, without another word, he pulled away from her completely. He slid his boxer briefs back on, as if he’d just remembered they were still sitting mid-thigh, and got off the bed altogether. Beth panicked.

“No, Daryl, I told you not to feel bad about it, I don’t…”

Daryl didn’t let her finish, stomping back and pulling her into another kiss — short and sweet.

“It’s fine,” he murmured, the corner of his lips lifting into that half-smile of his that always made her heart race. “I’ll be right back. Just wait a second."

Could you be my boyfriend?
Oh, oh
Boys are such a big book that I've barely read

Another verse of her song made its way into her head unbidden, a smile spreading across her face as she thought that he actually was hers now. Just like she wanted.

Beth watched him as he left the room, snapping the door shut behind him all too gently, as if afraid of waking someone up.

That was the exact moment Beth remembered the existence of Merle Dixon. Merle Dixon, who was presumably sleeping in his room while she moaned louder than she ever had and screamed Daryl’s name like there was no tomorrow. A deep blush covered her cheeks, and the way her tummy squeezed wasn’t pleasant at all. God, she hoped she wouldn’t have to see him in the morning.

Before she knew it, the door snapped open again, and Beth flinched, for a second expecting to see Merle’s filthy little grin. She breathed a relieved sigh when she saw Daryl enter the room with a glass of water in one hand and a small towel in the other. He kicked the door shut after himself, this time making much more noise, and crossed the room swiftly. Beth watched his movements—so hot—and thought it was a darn shame she hadn’t gotten him to take off that shirt. It should be a crime to hide a chest like that behind clothes, she thought, just as Daryl stopped in front of her. He set the glass down on the nightstand and then got back onto the bed.

“Come on,” he murmured, his voice rough and even more hoarse than usual. “Shirt off.”

Beth, still sitting where he had left her, shot him a surprised look at the straightforward request.

“I’ll take off mine if you take off yours, Dixon,” she teased, smiling when the tips of his ears reddened under her gaze.

He gave her a look, but, to her utter disappointment, didn’t move to peel off his shirt. Instead, he asked, “You wanna get clean or not, Greene?” 

Beth snorted, a smirk tugging at her lips as she moved closer to the cloth he was holding up to her.

“Admit it. You’re just tryin’ to get me to take it off so you can gawk, huh?" she accused, her voice low and playful, but her heartbeat quickening at the closeness between them. 

“Nothin’ in there I haven’t already seen, sweetheart,” Daryl rasped, his tone almost casual, but there was an unmistakable tension in the air as he watched her, clearly not as unaffected as his words suggested. Beth would've rolled her eyes at him, only the intensity in his gaze made it hard to look away, her breath catching as his words hung between them.

It was kind of unfair, she thought, pouting just a little to herself, that she hadn’t seen him shirtless yet. She couldn’t deny the disappointment, but she was too blissed out to keep arguing, the aftershocks of their night still sending little thrills through her.

She considered grabbing the cloth to clean herself off without taking her shirt off, but, really, that seemed way less exciting than having his hands on her again. The thought of him touching her made her pulse flutter. So, with a reluctant sigh, she did as he asked, letting the shirt fall onto the sheets with a soft rustle, her heart pounding a little faster at the thought of him seeing her almost naked again.

Daryl didn’t move to clean her, though. Instead, when she glanced up at him, she found his eyes locked on her, his tongue caught between his lips as he watched her chest, the towel in his hand forgotten. Had it been anyone else, Beth would’ve instinctively covered herself, trying to shield her body from the insecurities that still lingered—those old worries about her breasts being too small, too plain. She almost did that now, an automatic reflex, but something in Daryl’s gaze made her freeze. There was heat in his eyes, sure, but more than that, there was something else—a look of wonder, an awe, something she couldn’t name yet. And though she didn’t dare call it love, she couldn’t help but hope it was. Her heart thudded in her chest at the thought. She knew he’d said all those things on the Ferris Wheel, but it still felt like a dream sometimes. Could this really be happening? Was he really as hers as she felt his? 

“I knew it,” she called him out, even though the sight of him, so taken aback with her, was slowly becoming her favorite one. The tips of Daryl’s ears reddened, and he cleared his throat, dropping his eyes instantly. He didn’t apologize, but a moment later, he found her eyes and swallowed, all bashful again, before asking:

“You want me to do it or...?”

She nodded, smiling, before he could finish that sentence, and that was all the permission he needed to drop his eyes back to her boobs.

The towel was wet but warm, clearly put under a hot stream, and Daryl moved it across her skin slowly. He sat close, his body radiating heat, his hands gentle on her. His eyes still roamed over her skin with such intensity, it made her feel like he was committing every inch of her to memory. Beth hoped he didn’t need to. She hoped there would be many nights just like that one, where they could share moments like this — quiet and tender.

Beth didn’t realize she started humming until Daryl spoke, his hoarse voice cutting through the silence and making her shiver lightly.

“One of yours again?”

He traded some of her hair through the towel, then threw the towel on the nightstand.

“Yeah,” she smiled, and before she could stop herself, she asked, “Wanna hear it?”

“Mhm, sure, why not? Just give me a second,” Daryl said, getting up and grabbing the shirt she had been wearing before tossing it near his wardrobe. He pulled out a clean one and brought it back to her. “Here.”

Beth slipped it on just as he turned to grab the glass of water from earlier. She took it from him with a smile, enjoying the little pampering, and gulped it down before shifting up the bed. Her heart hammered in her chest again. She had just had sex — or at least as close to it as you could get without penetration, she thought, blushing at her own thoughts — with Daryl Dixon. Her boyfriend, she was pretty sure he was, at least. And now she was about to sleep with him. In his bed. Her heart gave a violent lurch, and she had to hold back a giggle. In the same room where, just a few months ago, she'd pulled her pants down in front of him, barely knowing him. Mind-blowing. That's what it was.

She slipped under the covers, watching him as he stepped back to the door to turn off the light. The room went dark, and Beth blinked hard, trying to adjust as he made his way back to her.

Daryl laid back down, but just as she was about to press into his arms, he suddenly moved again. In one swift motion, he pulled his shirt off and dropped back down, as if the devil himself was chasing him. She heard him swallow hard, his body tense for no apparent reason — or at least, none she could think of. Beth could barely breathe at the sight of him stripping that shirt off. Even in the darkness, she could see the way his muscles rippled with the movement.

I’m dating the hottest man alive, and he hasn’t got a clue, Beth almost giggled at the thought, but her mind went completely blank when, a moment later, her eyes finally adjusted to the dark, and she saw more of his chest. Her gaze slid up from the smoothness of his abdomen to the taut muscles of his shoulders, his broad chest filling out the space between them — no defined six-pack, but still strong and manly in a way none of the boys at school could ever manage. And then, with sudden clarity, she realized that Daryl had irrevocably ruined boys for her. She'd never find any of them attractive again.

God, she wasn’t going to find anyone else attractive ever at all, was she?

"Happy now?" he grumbled, voice rough with a mix of frustration and something else she couldn't quite put a name to. It was the second time he’d asked her that tonight, but this time, the words were worlds away from the playful sweetness they held before.

Beth opened her mouth, ready to tease him, tell him no, she wasn’t happy — because, darn it, why hadn’t he let her enjoy the sight of him like this before now? But the words caught in her throat as she noticed how tense he still was. His arms were crossed tightly over his chest, the muscles flexing in a way that didn’t feel deliberate. Daryl wasn’t even breathing, his body rigid and closed off. He wasn’t looking at her either, his eyes fixed somewhere in the distance, as if avoiding hers entirely.

Her eyes searched his face, catching the flicker of nerves he was trying so hard to mask.

“Yeah,” she said softly, “but, Daryl…?”

His eyes snapped to hers at the sound of his name, sharp and guarded, but something softened as their gazes locked. For a moment, he looked like he might say something, but instead, he shook his head, cutting her off before she could press further.

He let out a long, hard breath, his shoulders sagging slightly as his arms slowly relaxed, dropping to his sides. The tension in his frame seemed to ebb as he kept his focus on her, the steady warmth in her eyes grounding him. After a moment, he raised a hand, gesturing for her to come closer.

“Just c’mere,” he murmured, his voice low, rough, but steadier now.

She settled herself against his chest, his heartbeat fast under her cheek, and she wondered what was making him so nervous. She could tell that he was waiting for her to ask, though, dreading it even, if the way he stilled again with her in his arms was any indicator. So Beth didn’t ask. Instead, she started singing, her voice low and soft:

“I know that you're much older, and you've had many lovers. But there's no place I'd rather be than underneath the covers,” She smiled, nuzzling into his skin near his collarbones as he finally started relaxing under her. “Next to you, next to you..."

"And I'm telling myself to be patient,
And I'm telling myself to wait,
'Cause when it comes to your love,

I over-anticipate.

And I know that I've done this before,
And I know that I can't predict fate,
But when it comes to your love,

I over-anticipate.”

She managed to sing almost the whole thing before her voice wavered, a blush coming to her cheeks yet again as she sang:

“Could you fall in love with me? Oh, oh, will I solve this mistery?”

Beth stopped singing, a sudden silence falling over them, interrupted only by the sound of their breathing. Her mouth went all dry, her hands twitched on his chest, and suddenly the words she was trying so hard to hold in bubbled out of her:

“I love you," she whispered, her voice soft but trembling with sincerity. She lifted her head quickly, her heart racing with sudden panic, desperate to catch his reaction. But there was nothing to catch. Daryl was already asleep, his chest rising and falling in a steady rhythm, eyes closed, his face completely at ease. He hadn’t heard her.

What a cliché, she thought with a small, wry smile.

Beth cradled his face gently in her hands, brushing her thumb along his stubbled cheek as she leaned in. She pressed a tender kiss to the corner of his mouth, her lips barely grazing his skin, and murmured against him, “I’m going to tell you tomorrow, okay?”

Daryl grunted softly in his sleep, almost as if answering her, and Beth couldn’t help but smile. Yeah, she’d tell him in the morning.

She laid back down, snuggling into his warmth and letting her eyes drift shut.

Happy. In love.

She didn’t notice the slight shift in Daryl’s muscles or the way his arms tightened around her, pulling her even closer. 

 

Daryl's eyes snapped open in the darkness, his heart pounding hard against his ribs. Beth slept soundly against him, her breaths calm and even, while Daryl’s mind raced. Her words — the gentle, heartfelt way she had said she loved him — repeated in an endless loop, refusing to let him rest.

Chapter 28: Ain't scared

Summary:

Beth said "I love you" and Daryl can't deal...

Beth lay on her side, curled up in the sheets, her face soft and peaceful, chest rising and falling in steady breaths. Her hair had mostly escaped its ponytail, spilling across the pillows, cascading down her back and shoulders, with a few strands brushing against her face. Daryl woke up curled around her, his hand splayed over the soft curve of her stomach, his nose buried in her hair. He didn’t know when he’d fallen asleep. He swore he’d spent hours turning over what she’d said to him, nerves tightening his gut again the second he opened his eyes. Yet, no worry could ever change how good it felt to wake up wrapped in her scent, warm and comfortable in a way he'd never experienced before.

He stayed there for a minute — maybe two — before forcing himself to pull away. His shirt lay crumpled by the bed. He grabbed it, pulled it over his head, and turned back to her. For what? He wasn’t sure. It didn’t feel like a choice — just something he had to do. Take another look. And there he stayed. Just looking at her, a knot of feelings too big and too raw filling him up until he didn’t know what to do with them.

His hands itched to touch her — to brush her hair away from her face, to close the space between them and lay kisses over her skin. But he held back. Not like he had any right to disturb her. Could never be good enough. But then again, he was almost sure she’d be happy if he did. He could imagine the smile she’d give him — that bright and beautiful thing, always sneaking up on him when he least expected it, just like her words had a few hours ago.

How the hell did he even get here?

A year ago, if someone told him he’d have a pretty blonde girl sleeping in his bed, he’d have laughed it off. Maybe said something crude to make Merle snicker, because the idea of a girl sticking around for more than a quickie — let alone someone special — wasn’t even a thing he let himself imagine. And no way it’d be a girl like Beth. Soft, warm, sweet — but not as innocent as people thought. A little shy, a bit unsure sometimes, but quick to learn. Strong. Capable. Always ready with a sharp comeback but just as quick to show kindness. She was one hell of a woman. The kind he’d have sworn didn’t exist, and even if they did, they wouldn’t be caught dead with someone like him.

So no, if anyone had predicted this future, he’d have told them they were full of shit. Maybe even broken a few teeth if they’d so much as suggested he’d look twice at little Beth Greene. He wasn’t a cradle robber. Wasn’t a rapist. And in no world would she willingly climb into his bed.

But here he was. And here she was.

His.

Not in some cheap, possessive way, but in a way that went beyond anything he could explain. He’d called it love in his head once—maybe twice, when he was feeling brave—but that didn’t seem like enough. Not when people tossed that word around like it didn’t mean a damn thing. Saying it one day, walking away the next, like it was easy to just find someone else to love instead. What Daryl felt for her? It wasn’t like that. Couldn’t be. Felt more like she was pumping life straight into his veins, making him feel so alive it hurt. 

Before this, the word "love" didn’t mean much to him. He knew what people thought it was, what they made it out to be. But he didn’t have any real reference for it—nothing to tie it to. Couldn’t even remember his mom ever saying it to him. Hell, he didn’t think anyone ever had. Definitely not Merle—he’d rather cut his own hand off than say something like that—and sure as hell not his dad, who only ever loved the bottom of a bottle, if he loved anything at all. And like he’d told Beth, for the longest time, he didn’t think love in a romantic sense was even real. Just seemed like wishful thinking, people fooling themselves, their hormones running wild.

So no, he hadn't been sure if that word was good enough, strong enough, to sum up what he felt for Beth.

But then she went and said it. And it was like his heart stopped dead, the word hitting him so hard it knocked the air out of his lungs. Suddenly, it meant something. Big. Important. And just like that, it didn’t matter anymore what anyone else did with that word. Didn’t matter how often it got thrown around or twisted up or overused. It was hers now. He’d never hear it again without thinking of her. The way she said it. Soft and quiet, just a whisper—but it slammed into him like a freight train, echoing through him like a scream.

Daryl reached out, let his fingers slide through the few strands of hair falling down her forehead and cheeks. He pushed them back gently, his eyes tracing the lines of her face as she breathed out a sigh through her sleep. 

Only three words, Daryl thought, remembering the night. Three words and he couldn’t breathe. Again.

He had barely managed to get himself under control after he went and stupidly pulled that shirt off himself, risking her seeing his messed-up back. He wasn’t even sure why he was freaking out so badly about it, making such a big deal out of some goddamned scars. Sure, he didn’t like the way people reacted to them, and he avoided showing them to anyone. Didn’t want to see the looks of pity or hear all those idiotic questions, like what happened or did he talk to anyone about it. As if some goddamned talk could help.

He didn’t even let Merle see. All those years since their father died, and Daryl still wore his clothes like armor around his brother, knowing that he wouldn’t be able to stand the look on his face if it ever came to it.

But this was Beth.

And she was letting herself be vulnerable with him, showing him parts of herself nobody else had ever seen. He should be able to do the same for her. It frustrated him, how nervous he suddenly was, as if she could ever be anything but kind about it. But maybe that was the thing, he thought. He was so used to pity, to disgust, to feeling ashamed of himself, he just wasn’t sure what it would do to him to have her react with kindness.

With love.

Not that he called it that before, not that he dared think she could ever feel a quarter of what he felt for her. How could he? She was so young. So impossibly bright. Had her whole life standing wide open before her. It ain’t right, some part of him still wanted to say. You’re startin’ college. You should get out there, party, have fun, try things, and discover yourself in the process or some other shit people did while studying. Not date me of all people. Not tie yourself to some dude, some nobody.

Beth stirred in her sleep, and Daryl had never jumped to his feet so fast. He gulped, watching her intently, breath caught in his chest.

Don't wake up, he pleaded with her, scared that she’d open those impossibly bright eyes of hers, look at him, and whisper those words again. And he’d have nowhere to hide this time.

What the hell did she even mean she loved him? How could she?

He didn’t have anything to offer her. Not the kind of life she deserved, that’s for sure. He was done resisting it, done pretending he wasn’t crazy about her, but even giving in, even knowing she wanted to be with him, he still didn’t let himself think she would stay. Not really. Not for long.

Nobody ever really did, Daryl repeated to himself for what seemed like the hundredth time, still watching her intently.

Beth didn’t wake up.

Daryl released a relieved breath before making himself move. He pulled on his pants and left the room in long, quick strides, not giving himself time to stop and look at her again. He had spent too much time staring at her like some creep as it was. It was still early, barely after seven, but he knew he'd have to wake her soon, take her to her friends' house, so that she could go to that fair again. Pretend that she hadn't been there a week before. That they hadn't walked around those booths holding hands like it was all normal. Like she could just be his girlfriend, simple as that.

Good things?  he thought, casting one last glance at her, before gently closing the doors behind him. They didn’t last. And he just knew he was going to fuck this up sooner or later. Have her change her mind. Be it because he did something awful in the past that she just wouldn’t be able to accept about him, because he lied to her, hid things he wasn’t supposed to, or simply because he’d act like an asshole one too many times. Hell, maybe she’d just wake up one day and realize that it simply wasn’t right, what he did to her, how he failed to keep this thing slow and respectful, or she’d just figure out she deserved something, someone better.

It’s been only a little over a week since he gave in and kissed her again, sealing their fate. He had only taken her on one real date in that time, but he surely didn’t waste any time getting in her pants. And yeah, he realized he wasn’t the only one to blame—he wasn’t blind and could tell she was strung up after what they did two days ago, hungry for more. Not even finding out she was listed as a potential next victim by the police, that Daryl was following her around like some damn stalker, could deter her from getting what she came here for. Nah, once this girl set her heart on something, there was no holding her back…

But wasn’t it all on him anyway?

Daryl was the one who had them cross that line. He did that when he followed her to that tree like some predator, and didn’t say no when she asked him to put his hands under her dress. Something snapped between them that afternoon, something changed the moment this desire got the best of them, and now it felt like they had reached the point of no return — all thanks to him, Daryl thought.

His mind was working overtime today, wasn’t it? Guilttripping him since the first thing in the morning. Daryl was so caught up in it, he didn’t notice the bathroom door opening until it almost hit him in the face. 

"Woah! Easy there, Tiger!" Merle hauled the door back, and Daryl stepped around him, grumbling under his breath, his ears reddening even as he turned away from his brother. There was a very small possibility that Merle hadn't heard them last night, and Daryl was suddenly hit with shame at how little he cared about it then. He hadn't even tried shushing her; the sounds she made had only spurred him on.

If he were the kind of man who deserved her... but he wasn't. No, he was nowhere near good enough, but it wasn't like he could do anything about that now. It was too late. The only way was deeper, down that rabbit hole, and it seemed to him like Beth wanted to race him there. No brakes on this rollercoaster. No way to get out.

And Daryl was scared.

It didn’t occur to him how much until she went and said it.

I love you.

Daryl had felt his throat close, and he couldn’t help it — the way his eyes fell shut the moment she moved.

But that was for the best. He wouldn’t be able to say it back. He didn’t think he’d be able to speak at all. He’d only spook her, acting like a loon, staring at her like she’s a seven fucking wonder — or worse — because his eyes were prickling dangerously when she cradled his face, her lips so soft on his skin as she kissed him. He didn’t think he could take one look at her and not break. And what a scene that would make, what a gruesome sight, if he started crying in her arms right after she told him she loved him. 

It would be way worse than Merle hearing them.

As he made his way to the kitchen counter, Daryl was preparing himself for all those crude remarks Merle surely came up with while suffering in the next room that night, but none came.

Merle trailed after him, surely using this opportunity to take in the state of him, but instead of a joke, he offered, "I was just about to start on some eggs. You and Red want some?"

Red?

Daryl scrunched his eyebrows, stopping a few steps before the counter and eying the pan his brother must have taken out before going to the bathroom. Sure enough, there were eggs sitting on the counter as well. And a fresh pot of coffee.

"Sure," he mumbled, shooting a glance at Merle. Any other day he'd be curious about his behaviour, but that day his thoughts went right back to Beth and those three damned words.

He was sure he was going to make her regret it. Somehow. That he’d scar her for life. Push her into something she wasn’t ready for. She might have acted like she knew what she was doing, but she was still just a young, inexperienced girl who fell in love.

With him. Of all people.

Beth Greene fell in love with him.

And he was terrified, so fucking terrified, of hurting her. Of losing himself in it. Of fucking it up. Not being gentle enough — or forgetting to be gentle at all. Of turning into his goddamned father. Hell, maybe he didn’t even need to turn into him; maybe he’d always been just like him, only he’d never really wanted to fuck anyone enough for it to show. The thought made his stomach twist with disgust, with hatred even, but his self-sabotaging mind just wouldn’t let it go. It was uncomfortable, how much he wanted her. How seeing that same hunger reflected in her eyes made him feel like he was losing his grip.

His brother made his way to the counter, but instead of the eggs, he reached for the cupboard. Daryl watched him pour himself some coffee, his lip caught between his teeth. He needed to get himself a cup too. But damn, what he really craved was a cig. Should've gotten some yesterday, Daryl thought unhappily, remembering his empty pack, and then blinked in surprise when Merle put the cup of steaming coffee in front of him with a loud clink.

“Coffee?” he asked, and Daryl glanced at him, not quite managing to hide his shock. Merle didn’t wait for the answer, instead turning to the pan and busing himself preparing breakfast for the three of them. He was humming under his nose, and that at least wasn’t uncommon for him, so Daryl sat down on one of the stools and took a first sip of his coffee, trying and failing to relax. Because how could he? When she said she was going to tell him again? Today? 

He barely even survived the first time.

“Got any smokes?” he rasped, the sound of his voice surprising him.

Usually, when Daryl wanted to avoid Merle’s teasing, he opted for either not speaking to him at all or speaking as little as possible. But he was going to get out of his own damn skin, sitting here like this.

“Yeah, here ya go,” Merle reached into his pocket and pulled out a pack, then threw them Daryl’s way.

Daryl put the smoke in his mouth, went to light it, his legs all jittery. He'll have to react, he realized suddenly. When she tells him again. He'll have to say something back this time. Well, not something. One thing to say only. 

He paused with the cigarette halfway to his mouth.

Nope. This won’t do.

He stood up. Moved. Merle called after him, but Daryl was already out the door.

Air. He needed air. And a smoke, or two. Maybe ten.

The morning light hit him in the eyes, making him scrunch his face in pain. It was hot outside, the summer giving them the kind of weather to remember through the rest of the seasons. Daryl lit his smoke, then leaned over the wall next to the doors, breathing in. Fresh air mixing nicely with tobacco, the long breaths calming him down a little. Not enough. Not by a mile.

The weight of her words hit him harder than he'd ever thought.

It was still hitting him a few hours later.

And it was with a sudden painful clarity that he realized: Ain't no way I'm comin' back from this.

She’d leave, and he’d never feel this way again.

He'd never feel alive again.

He'd be a dead man walking.

Unless...

Unless he doesn't fuck it up. But hell, fucking shit up was all he was good at. 

The doors burst open, and Daryl eyed Merle as he stepped outside with his own cigarette in his mouth. Daryl looked away, nerves returning twice as strong under Merle’s scrutinizing gaze. His brother just watched him for a long moment, leaning on the railing across from him. Then he drawled, all serious like he rarely was:

“Alright, out with it, little brother.”

Daryl snorted.

Like hell.

He didn’t answer, didn’t even look back at Merle, too busy glaring at the Dixon’s garage for no reason other than that it was in front of him at the moment.

The hit came from his right, and it wasn’t light. No, Merle punched him in his shoulder so hard, Daryl jumped, instantly shocked out of his stupor.

“Hey!” Daryl turned his glare to Merle, his cigarette falling out of his mouth. “The hell you think you’re doin’?”

He stomped closer, getting up in Merle’s face more on instinct than any real hope of being intimidating. Predictably, Merle just smirked, shoving the pack of cigarettes against Daryl’s chest in a halfhearted, borderline mocking gesture of apology.

“The hell I think I’m doin’?” Merle snorted, his grin spreading wide and mean. “Nah, lil’ brother. Question is, what the hell’s crawled up your ass?”

“Nothin’,” Daryl hissed, stomping back and fumbling with the pack of cigs, his hands jerking with a sudden, violent need for a drag.

“Nothin’. Sure looks like it, lover boy.” Merle’s grin only widened as he leaned against the wall next to Daryl, arms crossed, watching him like a hawk. “Figured you’d be struttin’ outta there like a damn rooster in a henhouse after all that late-night singin’. So, what gives?”

Daryl blew smoke out the side of his mouth, his jaw tight as a drum. “Ain’t none of your damn business.”

Merle raised his hands in mock surrender, but his grin stayed fixed. “Touchy, touchy. Just sayin’, looks like you’re spinnin’ your wheels. What, she got you tied up in knots again?”

Daryl didn’t answer right away, his silence heavy in the air as he took another drag. A plan started forming in his mind as he eyed his brother with annoyance.

In a second, he'd tell Merle to fuck off, stomp on another cigarette, and go back in. Then he’d drink the rest of his coffee and wait for Beth to wake up and come out of the room all by herself. So that he didn’t have to go back in and wake her. So that she had no opportunity to repeat those words at him again. Hell, maybe he’d have another argument with Merle, loud enough to wake her. They’d eat together, Merle would be Merle, and then he’d take her to that friend of hers, he’d rush out of there, and if she was mad at him for not saying a proper goodbye, he’d tell her he didn’t want anyone to spot them.

She wouldn’t even have to know that he was a coward. That he could deal with her wanting him on a good day, but with her loving him? That’s… That’s just…

“I’m not…” Daryl started, shaking his head, startling himself with how it wasn’t a fuck off, Merle that left his mouth after all. “I don’t know what the hell I’m doin’, Merle.”

He didn’t see the expression his brother was wearing, his eyes stubbornly looking down and to the side, but he could imagine the smirk, could almost hear the words: Don’t be pathetic, boy. You ain’t worth a damn if you can’t even handle a woman right. And only realized he was imagining his father there, hearing his father’s voice instead of his brother’s, when Merle spoke:

“Aw, hell, that’s what this is?” There was no sneer in his brother’s voice and Daryl’s eyes snapped to his face, surprised, before he could hold himself back. Merle’s grin faltered, replaced by a flicker of something more thoughtful as he eyed him. “You’re scared you’ll mess it up?”

“Ain’t scared,” he shot back defensively, biting down on his lip as he struggled for words. “Just… I don’t want to screw this up, but I don’t… It’s…” He shrugged, swallowing the rest of it, ashamed of himself. Not like Merle could ever possibly understand. Not like Daryl could ever explain it to him well enough. Not like he should. Dixons weren’t some soft pussies, talking feelings like they had any. “Whatever.”

He glanced away from his brother, moving before he could make fun of him. He was right by the door when Merle’s hand shot up, grabbing at his arm and pulling him slightly back.

“Don’t be an idiot,” he drawled and Daryl froze. He didn’t dare look back at his brother’s face. “You get a woman laughin’ at your dumb ass and screamin’ your name like that? No need to worry. Only thing you’re screwin’ is her.”

That play on words hit Daryl like a punch, but it cracked through the whirlwind of emotions for a second, bringing a bit of amusement. It wasn’t helpful at all, this thing Merle just said, but somehow, in the strangest way, it eased his nerves a little. The image of Beth laughing crossed his mind now, making him feel all those things Dixons supposedly didn’t feel, and he thought, he’d like that, if not screwing it up simply meant that he had to keep her laughing, all happy like that. He didn’t think it was this simple, though.

He gave Merle an unimpressed look, but instead of sassing him back, he found himself muttering an honest, “Told you, ain’t about sex with her.”

Merle rolled his eyes, his smirk returning as he teased, “Sure. Must’ve been one hell of a sweater you knitted for her last night that got her all excited like that.”

Daryl’s cheeks darkened, something in Merle’s tone reminding him about that one weed-smoking summer, the way Merle had said to him then, all proud: Look at ya, little brother, smokin’ like an old man.

“Shut up,” he shot back now, and Merle laughed, this crude little thing, that always reminded Daryl of their father. Only suddenly it didn’t sound similar at all.

Lacking this special mix of disdain and bitter callousness that always clung to Will Dixon. Merle Dixon was a right bastard, and nobody knew that better than Daryl, but it wasn’t all there was. And Daryl wasn’t sure if it was because of Beth, or because of something else entirely, that he was seeing it now. But perhaps he was wrong—Daryl thought as he stepped back into the apartment, pushed a little by Merle, who went on about how the eggs were probably all cold now, all ‘cause they were busy gossipin’ like a bunch of school girls—perhaps they didn’t have that much of their father in them, or at least not enough to ruin them. ‘Cause Will Dixon wouldn’t be caught dead trying to make Daryl feel better, wouldn’t even care to notice him feeling down. Hell, he’d try to bring Daryl down at the first sign of weakness, ‘cause no son of his was going to be a damn sissy.

And if Merle could rise above their fucked-up upbringing like that, then maybe Daryl didn’t need to worry about turning up just like their father either.

Maybe.

“Hi,” Beth’s voice caught through Merle’s ramblings, and Daryl raised his eyes to see her standing in the middle of their living room, wearing a sunny dress, and for the lack of a better word, glowing. She looked at him with that special glint of hers, and it felt like a punch right in the chest—the sudden realization of what that look was, what it meant. She was smiling at him, no evidence of hurt or regret, just happiness, and for a second, he could do nothing but stare at this girl he was in love with. The girl who was in love with him.

“Hi,” he rasped after a moment, his voice not cooperating suddenly.

He was only vaguely aware of Merle’s amused snort or the way his brother tapped him on the shoulder, almost as if in reassurance, before moving away in the direction of the counter.

“Agh, mornin’, got any special breakfast requests?” Merle chipped in, saving the room from the strange silence that would otherwise settle over them. “Today we’re servin’ eggs on eggs. How ‘bout that, Red?”

Beth giggled, her eyes leaving him to glance at Merle. She blushed, looking at his brother, as if she, too, realized by now that they were way too loud, but that didn’t stop her from asking:

“Red?”

Only when she said that did Daryl realize the source of that nickname. The lingerie that his brother saw by accident. The same one she had on last night.

He shot a mortified look at his brother, who showed him all of his teeth in response.

“Yep, Red,” he confirmed, then said the most cheesy thing Daryl had ever heard leave his mouth. “‘Cause you spell danger, girlie.”

Beth let out a surprised laugh, and Merle turned to wink at Daryl, all proud of himself. It made Daryl snort, too, at the silliness of it.

And when half an hour later he drove her to the other part of town, he didn’t even remember the plan he’d made. About rushing out of there the moment she got off his bike.

Beth handed him the helmet back, and Daryl watched her blush, cast her eyes down, all cute, before looking back at him with that special glint again. There was no force in the world that could make him move then. He swore she pinned him to that spot with her eyes, froze the goddamn world around them.

“Look, I won’t be sad if you don’t say it back, okay?” she started, her voice soft, a little bashful, and he fell a little bit more in love with her for that, for giving him this free out-of-jail card. For knowing that this might be difficult for him. “But I need you to know…” His heart gave a violent twist, a shudder going through him when she stepped closer to the bike to cradle his face in her hands. She kissed him then, as if steeling herself. A chaste little thing that ended with her leaning back and wetting her lips with the tip of her tongue in a nervous gesture, her eyes finding his—warm and sincere. I love you, Daryl thought just as Beth made good on her late-night promise: “I love you, Daryl Dixon.”

He didn’t cry, but the whimper that escaped him was as close to a sob as you could get, and before he could really think about it, about where they were—outside, the corner of some street anyone could spot them at—he was pulling her closer, his fingers twisting in the material of her dress as he pressed their lips together in a deep, searing kiss, hoping it was enough for her to forget all about that pathetic sound. The kiss was slow and long, and he would gladly keep on going, keep on telling her how much he loved her in the only way he could communicate it to her for now. But a group of noisy teenagers stumbled onto the street, and Beth quickly stepped back and out of his arms. She scanned his face, smiling as if whatever she saw there measured up to her expectations, and all Daryl could do was smile back at her like a lovestruck fool.

*

Beth was following her friends from activity to activity, not really hearing anything that was being said. The boys didn’t join them after all. Amy broke things off with Thomas last night—which Beth would know about if she answered her phone—and she didn’t want his friends to try and convince her to change her mind. Amy seemed only slightly mad at her, and Beth was glad she wasn’t making a big deal out of it, because if she was being completely honest with herself, she didn’t even have it in her to feel bad about it. Answering the phone to listen to boy problems instead of fooling around with one Daryl Dixon? Forget it. Not a chance.

And what fooling around it was. Beth was blushing at the memory, thinking about all the kisses, all the touches—ahh, if she could just stop time and spend at least a few more weeks in that bed with him. Doing nothing but exploring this new, exciting side of life. Instead, she thought, she was going to leave for college in a week, and who knows how her life would look then. She’d make sure to have her weekends free, that’s for sure. She doubted they would find the time to see each other during the weekdays, but if she could get with him on Friday nights, all Saturdays and Sundays, maybe she’d survive the distance.

“Earth to Beth?” Lily waved her hand in front of Beth’s face, and Beth snapped her eyes to her friend.

“Hm?”

Lily and Amy exchanged looks.

“Okay, what’s going on?” Amy asked. “You’re acting all…”

She made a vague gesture, and Lily finished for her.

“Weird. Sketchy. Like you’re hiding something. Again.”

“Lils,” Amy murmured sharply, and Lily shrugged.

“What? She is.”

Beth dropped her gaze to her fries, sitting in front of her, untouched, forgotten until now. She wasn’t going to tell them. Couldn’t. Not after the last time. Lily was so mad at her. She would’ve never forgiven her if she knew that Beth was dating Daryl now. Fooling around with him. Waking up in his bed on the weekends. Telling him she loved him. And kissing him.

Oh, but kissing him was the best part.

She felt like giggling, just thinking about it, all giddy.

“It’s nothing. I just… I have a lot on my mind, you know? College and…”

“What a bunch of bullshit,” Lily rolled her eyes and got up before Amy could oppose her behavior again. “Fine, you want to be that way, then be that way. See if I care.”

“Hey, where are you going?” Amy called after her.

“To have fun, what do you think?!” Lily called back.

“Oh my God, I don’t know what’s with her today,” Amy commented, seemingly tired of their friend, but her eyes were glued to Lily’s back in a way that told Beth a completely different story.

“Why don’t you go after her?” Beth proposed, and Amy shot her a surprised look.

“And what about you?”

Beth smiled, a little apologetically.

“We both know I’m not feeling it today. You go, have fun, and I’ll just sit here for a bit. Call you when I’m ready to join?”

“Alright, yeah, we can do that.” Amy got up, shooting a glance in the direction in which Lily disappeared, then turning her eyes to Beth again. She seemed a little unsure still, eyeing her with consideration. “But are you sure you’re okay?”

“Yeah, I’m good, great. Promise.”

Amy nodded, and with that, she left Beth alone. She didn’t really want this trip to end up in another fight, but it was harder to pretend today. Harder to keep it all in. She was bursting at the seams with the need to tell someone. To share this beautiful thing that was happening to her. It really spoke volumes that she found Merle’s presence this morning to be a refreshing change from the constant worrying about people seeing them together. She wished Shawn was just as okay with this. Maybe then she wouldn’t feel so detached from the outside world all the time. Like she had two lives that could never cross. Like all those people she loved and cared about didn’t really know her anymore. She felt changed. Different in a way they couldn’t possibly understand, not knowing about Daryl Dixon. About this bond that felt larger than life somehow. Stronger even than what she ever thought love could be.

She found it frustrating, hiding this whole big thing that was happening to her, back when they were just meeting at the clearing, when she was still just dreaming about what could be. But now? It’s been a little over a week, and it was slowly becoming unbearable. Things between them were so intense, happening so fast—as if they had to make up for that month of keeping each other at arm’s length. Although, they weren’t really.

Beth smiled, thinking about all these meetings at their clearing. About the conversations, and all the teasing, and all the completely innocent touching that was driving her mad. She supposed it finally did. Drove her mad. That was the only explanation for how obsessed she was with him now. Well, not the only one. One of many, Beth thought, reaching for her phone and finding his name on the list of her contacts.

The thought occurred to her then, that they had no photos together, none at all, only those from the Fair. They should change it, she thought absent-mindedly, her finger pressing on the call button…

“Beth?” Beth disconnected the call quickly and raised her head at the sound of a voice. “Beth Greene?”

The man smiled at her, his brown eyes warm and kind on her face.

“Oh, hi,” she smiled back, not recognizing him yet. He knew her name, though, and he did seem kind of familiar. She tried to pull his name out of her memory, but to no avail. She could bet it was showing all over her face too, since her face liked to betray her emotions well too often, but he didn’t seem to notice.

“How are you?” he asked, and she nodded, still not quite placing him.

“Good, yeah, just came here to have some fun with my friends.”

“Fun. Nice.” He nodded, smiling, looking at her with consideration, the smile reaching his eyes, as if he was really glad to see her here.

It was strange, because she was pretty sure she’d known him from somewhere, but the name just wasn’t there. He was an average-looking man in a brown cardigan and blond, a little greasy hair, and the way he was holding himself was putting him on the wacky side. Still, she didn’t feel threatened by his presence. Not yet, at least.

“And, um, what are you doing here?” she asked, just to be polite.

“Here with my niece,” he almost jumped at the opportunity to tell her. “She loves Fairs like that, but her dad ain’t got no time for it, so I take her sometimes.”

“That’s lovely.” Beth smiled, kind, but itching for him to leave so she could talk with the person she really wanted to talk to. “Where is she now?”

To her utter displeasure, the man took a seat next to her, then pointed at the little girl sitting at the DIY stand, decorating cookies. She couldn’t be older than twelve. She stood with her back to Beth, so Beth wasn’t sure if she was familiar or not.

“Mhm, that’s nice,” she turned her attention to her phone for a second, skipping to Amy’s name, wondering if she should just go, perhaps. Join them. Maybe say sorry for being a bad friend.

“Don’t you want to know how I’ve been?” he asked suddenly, and Beth raised her eyes at him. A strange way to phrase this. A strange way to address someone. He wasn’t smiling anymore, looking at her with a crease between his eyebrows, as if she was the odd one.

Her heart jumped in her chest. The photos she found at Daryl’s suddenly flashed through her mind.

Beth met brown eyes, her eyebrows scrunching, her brain working faster now, trying to place him. She decided to play along.

“How have you been?”

“Good, real good lately,” he answered, his voice pleasant, if a little goofy. “It’s been a lil’ rough, a lil’ lonely sometimes, you know? But keeping close to my family helps.”

She nodded. They thought she could be next, she thought, then countered herself: yeah, but it was months ago.

He was looking at her, waiting for her to say something, the silence stretching between them a little too long.

Don’t be ridiculous. He’s just some guy. You’re at the Fair, lots of people here. You’re just panicking for no reason at all.

“Yeah, family is important,” she agreed finally, her voice breaking slightly.

“Good to have a hobby too,” he added, leaning a little bit in her direction with that dopey smile, and suddenly, it all clicked.

The air left her, relief making her shoulder sag a little.

Oh, she forgot he still lived in their town. It was good to see him. Out and about like that. Taking care of his niece.

She wondered if Amy and Lily would remember him.

“So, you’re still keeping all those flowers?” Beth asked him now, tension leaving her. God, for a second, she was getting really creeped out. Be it because of those photos Daryl had of hers, the knowledge that someone might have wanted to take her, not only that night at the Bronze, or because of the strange aura of this man, the unsettling way in which he was speaking. But now, it all made sense. She still couldn’t remember his name, though.

“And the bees, yes,” he nodded, then asked out of nowhere: “Do you still keep a diary?”

Something with an A, maybe? Alvin? Alex?

“Oh, you remember that?” Strange, he must have been talking with so many kids back in the day, and this was such a minor detail. “Yes, I do. I take it with me everywhere, just in case I have a thought that I need to write down.”

“Ah, yes. Thoughts have a strange way of pouring out of us at the worst moments. Daryl.”

“What?” She blinked at him.

“Is calling you.” Beth looked down at her phone, to Daryl’s name flashing on it almost like some metaphorical red mark on her forehead, indicating guilt.

Chapter 29: The hell are you acting all skittish for, huh?

Summary:

Another girl is found dead, and Daryl has no other option but to get involved in the case again.

Notes:

Surprise – another chapter is here! :)
Fair warning: we're going to dive a little deeper into the 'crime' side of this fanfic now – I hope you're going to like it. Fingers crossed - enjoy! <3

***

Another girl’s body was found on Tuesday. It was all over the news, but Rick told him a few hours before it aired.

She was from a few towns over, but her body was discovered on the grounds of their city, in the woods. Spotted by some hiker, lying in a bed of roses—much like Sophia—and so unlike the second victim in their town. Yet again, there was nothing he could do to prevent this, but he still felt like crap, knowing how little time and thought he’d dedicated to this case lately. At first, right after Sophia, they really pulled their weight, trying to locate the monster that hurt her, but then, like he told Beth, with no new evidence coming in and no traces of anyone, the case died down. Rick’s team didn’t find anything new when they examined the second victim, and his forensics were baffled by how different this murder was from the first in their little city. There were even speculations about two serial killers being active in the area, but it didn’t add up. And now, with the third girl from another city—killed in the same manner as the first—it made even less sense.

“The guys from 67 turned their backs on us,” Rick said furiously when he came to pick up his car that morning.

“They can do that?”

Daryl never liked the police much, but he thought they had some rules that kept them from acting like assholes to each other at the very least.

Rick sighed.

“Yeah, they do, sometimes. When there ain’t nothing left to add to the case. The girl, she had no family. Grew up in an orphanage, ran away when she was twelve, ended up in drugs. No one to notify about her death, no one to ask any questions. Looks like they got nothing on her.”

Daryl hummed. “But you know, it makes no sense. Why go for someone who lives this far away? Why drive her here? She was dead for some time too, way longer than Sophia when he brought her out to the woods. They didn’t give me the time of death yet, but I can tell you this—she was dead for at least a week.”

Rick never asked for anything outwardly anymore, knowing Daryl didn’t work well under pressure. But Daryl could tell all the same when Rick wanted something from him. It was because of that intuition that he said:

“I could head to that city she came from, check out the slums, ask around.”

Rick raised his head to him, hope evident in his eyes, but he didn’t stop their little game.

“I can’t ask you to do that, Daryl,” Rick shook his head. “It’s too dangerous. I don’t have jurisdiction there, and if anyone finds out I sent you..."

Daryl rolled his eyes.

“Ain’t like I’m gonna be shoutin' your name from the rooftops, darlin’,” he drawled, making eyes at his friend. Rick sniffed a laugh under his breath. “Just gonna sniff around a little, sell some honey to the sugar-eatin’ maniacs, y’know. Business as usual.”

Rick snorted at Daryl’s silly little euphemisms. The times when he would try to come up with more sophisticated and less direct metaphors were long gone. Rick knew it was all mostly bullshit anyway. He wasn’t doing any side business unless Merle had gotten him into something. And after what happened with Zach, Daryl didn’t even want to hear about side hustles at the garage. Now it had somehow become even more important to him to be an upstanding citizen, no matter how much Merle might laugh at him for it. He wasn’t adding any more reasons to the already long list of ‘reasons why my girlfriend’s folks are gonna wanna put me six feet under once they find out.’

Girlfriend, huh? Getting cozy with that term, aren’t we?

“Jesus, just get a room, fairies,” Merle murmured under his breath, walking by them on his way to the coffee machine. He side-eyed them with disgust, making Rick laugh yet again. There was nothing Merle hated more than Daryl’s friendship with the sheriff. Even the fact that it got Merle out of some trouble couldn’t change that.

Once Merle disappeared back into his office, Rick leaned forward.

“Alright. Let’s say you go there and check things out. What if you find something?”

“You mean the bastard that did it?”

“Mhm, what will you do then?”

Daryl fell silent for a moment, his eyes glued to Rick’s. They stared at each other for what felt like an eternity before Daryl finally gave up. He sighed, losing their staring battle on purpose.

“Yeah, I’ll call ya, like the good girl I am.”

This time, Rick didn’t laugh at his quip.

“I’m serious, Daryl. Don’t do anything stupid, alright? Don’t…” Rick trailed off.

“Kill the bastard? Sure, ain’t gonna. What about light torture though? Choking? Stabbing? Some dismembering?”

Rick gave him an unimpressed look.

“I told you, I have no jurisdiction there, Daryl.”

“Fine,” he muttered, and took a good look at his friend. He didn’t look well—unshaven, dark circles under his eyes. His skin looked dry, like he hadn’t been drinking enough water in the last few days, and there was a new slight hunch in his posture, as if the weight of something was pressing him down. Daryl bit the inside of his cheek thoughtfully, then asked, his tone softer: “You talked to her again?”

Rick shook his head, then sighed, knowing instantly that Daryl was asking about Lori.

“There’s nothing to talk about,” he groaned, raking his hand through his hair with frustration. “She won’t tell me who it is.”

Daryl shrugged.

“We could find out.”

“And then what? Light torture?” The corner of Rick’s mouth quirked into an amused smile. That was good, Daryl thought, that he could still find humor, even three days after his wife told him she couldn’t take it anymore. When he tried to convince her to stay, she all but shouted in his face that she was sleeping with someone. Had been for some time now, apparently. Rick didn’t know much more than that because she didn’t want to say anything else. Just packed up the kids and went to her mother.

Rick told him that on Saturday night when they went out together. Rick was planning on drinking himself stupid, and Daryl, being a good friend and all, had to join him in that endeavor. And he was never more thankful to Will Dixon for installing the fear of feelings-sharing in him. Daryl got so stupidly drunk, if it wasn’t for the years of shutting that part of himself off, he was sure he would’ve babbled about Beth to Rick by the end of that night. He was on the verge of doing that every time Rick said something like: “You’re lucky, you know? No wife, no girlfriend, no fucking trouble.”

Yeah, sure, no trouble yet, but he knew it was coming. Once people found out about his controversially young girlfriend, he’d be in for a lot of it.

He wondered if Rick would ever look him in the eye again after.

Daryl lied to him, after all—said there was nothing between him and Beth back when Rick caught them snuggling on his couch. It was true enough back then, he supposed, but there was nothing true in what he said to Rick when he asked about the damned hickeys Beth left on his neck on Friday night. Daryl didn’t even notice them until Rick pointed them out. He eyed himself in the pub’s mirror when Rick glanced away and groaned internally—even in the dim light, he could see dark spots on his skin.

"Ain’t nothin'. Just got into a scrap, s’all,” he murmured to Rick back then, and Rick snorted, obviously not believing him.

“Don’t you think I’ve seen enough bruises in my life to know the difference? What’s the scrap’s name, huh?”

If Rick was sober and in a much better mood, Daryl would be freaking out internally. It was easy enough to deflect, though, what with Rick’s mind on Lori and whoever she was screwing behind his back. Daryl got himself out of that one without breaking a sweat. He still felt bad about lying, though. About the way he shrugged dismissively and threw a simple “Ain’t nothin’ worth talking about.”

One of the biggest lies he’d ever told.

Rick didn’t question him anymore, though—not on Saturday, and not on Tuesday.

Rick left him that morning with all the information he had on the case and a promise that he’d keep him informed if they found anything else. Only once he was out the door did Daryl realize that somehow, he’d gotten himself in the middle of this shit again. Even though there was no reason for him to get involved.

But could he turn down the possibility of finding that sick monster? Carol’s screams the night they found Sophia still haunted him to this day. Perhaps it was naive of him to think he could find something by following this lead, but it had been a long time since he could do anything about Sophia’s killer, so he would take this over nothing.

He took his phone and smiled at the message Beth sent him during Rick’s visit.

Beth 10:32
So, what are we thinking today? Mexican or Italian?

It stung that he wouldn't be seeing his girl that day. But if he could track down that sick bastard, maybe—just maybe—he’d have a shot at dating Beth for real. Out in the open. Without sneaking around.

Yeah, right. Daryl snorted at himself. What now, Dixon? Thinkin’ her folks’ll suddenly be alright with it just ‘cause you ain’t a killer?

Fat chance.

Even without the whole town ready to come at him with pitchforks and shotguns, he didn’t stand a snowball’s chance in hell of winning them over. Not with a name like Dixon. That alone was point two on the list of reasons her parents’d love to see him buried. Not to mention all the other points: the age difference, her being barely out of high school, him being no more than a mechanic, no money, no future, and a bad reputation. Another list that just went on and on.

And Beth was right. Of course, she was. This thing between them—it wasn’t like what happened to Sophia or any of those other girls. He knew it. She knew it. Hell, even Merle wouldn’t have connected the two. But her parents? They’d see it their way, not his.

Old enough to make her own choices? Maybe.

Old enough to pick a guy twelve years older with a bad rep and a bike? Not a chance in hell.

So yeah, a bullet to the head seemed more than likely.

Daryl 10:52
Gonna have to take a raincheck, girl. I have to leave town for a day or two.

Beth 10:53
What? Why?

Daryl 10:54
I’ll tell you later. Stay safe.

Beth 10:55
You stay safe, Daryl Dixon.

Daryl rolled his eyes, his lips itching to smile. Cheeky little minx.

“Say hi to Red for me, lil bro,” Merle said, walking past him again, and Daryl glared at him in response, more for sport than anything else.

He didn’t mind the light teasing. It was harmless enough, and the new nickname Merle chose for Beth threw everyone off the trail, so Daryl was, actually, thankful. And if Merle was a little too smug about this whole thing when Zach and Santucci started throwing in the names of random redheads Daryl could be dating, that was a side effect Daryl was completely fine with. At first, he was a little worried that his brother would reveal the truth during his little shenanigans, but it seemed that Merle meant it this time when he said he’d keep his mouth shut.

Daryl left that day feeling like, for once, things were going pretty well for him. Merle was set on keeping his mouth shut, Jess and the guys had the garage covered, and this time, he had someone special to come back to.

His girl. Beth.

Waiting for him.

That was more than he ever figured he’d have, and it was exciting—sure—but also still unbelievably, overwhelmingly, fucking terrifying. God, he was a damn wuss, wasn’t he? Didn’t think it was possible to be scared of so much at once and still be stupidly happy, but here he was.

Rick had given him the address of the place where seventeen-year-old Marlene Mitchell had been staying, so that’s where he went first. If he was gonna find anything, it’d be there.

Or not...

“Old news. She met a guy, two, three years ago I think? Moved in with him. Last time I saw her, she was clean as a baby,” a woman in her fifties told him, sitting on one of the mattresses thrown against the wall. Next to her, a young guy was talking to himself, grinning like a damn fool, while the rest of the people in the room were either zoned out or getting ready to check out. The woman wasn’t sober, either—speech slurring a bit—but Daryl figured this was about as good as it was gonna get.

“You know where his apartment is?”

“Who’s?”

“The guy Marlene was stayin’ with,” Daryl reminded her.

“Oh, no, but she met him at this AA meeting. He became her sponsor or something. I don’t remember his name, sorry.”

“That’s okay. Do you know where the meetings were being held?”

“Mhm, at that lovely white church. You can’t miss it; it’s the one with the cross on top.”

Daryl sighed when she couldn’t recall any other details about Marlene and thanked her for her help. It wasn’t groundbreaking, knowing that she got out of this place, got herself some boyfriend, a real flat, and a clean slate—but it was something. Maybe that boyfriend of hers was exactly who Daryl was looking for?

The church really was hard to miss. It was huge, white, and stood on top of a hill with a wooden cross on top. When Daryl got there, the church was locked. The last mass had been a few hours ago, and the next one wouldn’t be until the next morning. Daryl looked through the information on the door and found out that AA meetings happened on Wednesdays and Fridays.

“Damn it.”

He’d have to stay the night if he wanted to talk to someone at that church, and he wasn’t even sure if any of the priests would know anything about the AA meetings. It was most likely run by someone else, someone who rented the spot from the church.

The visit to the orphanage turned out to be a dead end as well. He told the woman working there that his mother was Darren Mitchell’s sister (the name Rick had given him) and that he had no idea Darren had any kids, but he’d found out lately and was now looking for Marlene. Curiously enough, the woman believed him, but Daryl wasn’t sure if it was because of his great lying skills or the fact that she found him attractive. She kept making eyes at him, complimenting him for wanting to take care of his family, even calling him a handsome man and asking if his wife didn’t mind taking care of some long-lost family member. She smiled when he told her there was no wife and gave him her number in case he needed anything else, but she didn’t have anything useful to say to him.

When he got to the motel room that evening and threw himself on the bed, the only thing he wanted to do was crash and wake up in the morning. Make the time go faster so he could leave this place quicker. He was on the verge of falling asleep when Beth called him.

“Sorry, I didn’t want to wake you…” she said upon hearing his tired voice. He’d texted her earlier to let her know he’d be staying for the night here without disclosing where he was. If she was curious about his little trip, she hid it well, not asking a single question. Probably waiting for him to tell her like he promised.

“Nah, it’s fine. I wanted to call you, too.”

“You did, huh?”

Daryl smiled, hearing happiness in her voice.

“Yeah, but this whole day was kinda tiring, you know? I drifted off a bit. How are things back at home?”

“Everyone’s kinda sad and panicked again, because of that girl they found. But you know that already, don’t you? That there was another murder?”

“Yeah, Rick told me in the mornin’.”

Beth fell silent for a moment, but Daryl didn’t mind. He closed his eyes, listening to her breathing on the other side of the line.

“That’s why you went away?” she asked finally, sounding like she already knew the answer.

“Yeah, I had to follow some leads that Rick couldn’t. I’ll check one more place tomorrow morning, and then I’m headin’ back.”

“That’s good. I miss you.”

“You saw me, what, three days ago?”

“I know,” she said, a smile in her voice. “That’s way too long. Don’t you miss me, Daryl Dixon?”

Like crazy.

“You know I do, girl.”

“Yeah?” Beth giggled, and Daryl couldn’t help but smile at it.

“Yeah, you want me to pinky swear to it or somethin’?”

Beth went silent for a moment. He heard her shuffle on her bed.

“So you’re not flirtin’ with any other women over there?” she teased him, as if she knew, could tell that someone tried to get with him that very day.

“Nah, but I had one tryin’ to flirt with me. Gave me her number, even.”

“Oh, was she pretty?” Beth asked, amusement clear in her voice, bringing back their conversation from the garage.

“Dunno,” he murmured, honest, confirming what she probably already figured the last time she was being nosy about some woman he talked to. “Got my eyes on one girl. That’s it.”

Beth laughed again, a happy little sound that he could listen to for the rest of his life and never get bored of hearing. You’re so gone on her, it’s nauseating, Merle had muttered to him a day before, listening to them talk over the phone. And the worst wasn’t even the fact that he was well aware of how lovey-dovey he was with her. It was that he meant every single silly, cheesy thing he said to her.

“Lucky girl,” Beth commented, then added as an afterthought, “I’ve been thinkin’ about you today, you know?”

“Mhm, happy thoughts?”

“Exciting thoughts,” she replied softly, probably not wanting anyone to hear her through the door of her bedroom. “About what we could do tomorrow.”

“And what’s that?” he mused, trying to sound calm even though his heart had started to pick up its pace.

“I’ve been thinkin’ I could come over after our training,” she said carefully. “Spend the night at your place again. Would you… would you like that?”

Daryl tensed up. Would he like her to stay at his place? Hell yeah, he’d like for her to sleep in his bed every goddamned night. To wake up with her. Make breakfast for her. Listen to her laugh and talk his ears off with whatever she found important enough. But he knew it was dangerous, and not only because they could be found out. But also, mostly, because things just kept escalating between them, getting more and more heated every single time they met, and the more they did, the less in control he felt.

He was losing himself in her.

It felt like there was this part of him that he’d never let out before, never really got to explore, taking the reins of him now. It was what made him act against his own words, telling Beth they were having an innocent sleepover one minute and pushing her onto the kitchen counter to make out with her in the next. It was what pushed him to crowd her against that tree, like he’d never imagined himself doing. It was how he ended up watching her sleep in his bed on Saturday, thinking about how he wanted to keep things light the night before. How one word, one look from her, made him throw his resolve through the window.

And Daryl just wanted to be good to her, wanted to do right by her, but he had no idea what that even meant anymore. He thought he did. When he kissed her at their clearing and later when they went to the Fair, and she kept smiling and laughing, so happy just because of him.

But it’s only been a little over a week. Jesus Christ. If they keep at it, if he doesn’t get himself under control, it’ll be a true miracle if she’s still a virgin by the end of the next one.

Daryl shivered at that thought, his eyes closing as if it could shield him from his own mind.

“What’s with all the sleepovers?” he said, his voice light and amused, even as he shuddered. “Don’t you have enough time to talk with me during the day, girl?”

Beth snorted, but when she spoke again, Daryl recognized the new tone in her voice instantly.

“Talkin’ wasn’t exactly what I had in mind, Daryl.”

Of course, it wasn’t. He knew that, but she still managed to catch him completely off guard with what came next. Her words were hesitant but sincere, her tone almost shy. He could just imagine her cheeks turning pink, her fingers fiddling with the hem of her shirt or her hair as she spoke, but she didn’t back down.

“I think… I think I’m ready to go all the way, you know? But it’s not like—” She stumbled a little, pausing to gather her words. “I’m not sayin’ it has to happen tomorrow or anything, but… it could. You know, if you wanted to?”

She was ready.

If he wanted.

Shit.

It was as if she could read his mind. Only she was drawing completely different conclusions from him. He thought he was wrong for it, for letting it escalate like that, and here she was, basically telling him to stop holding back.

What the hell was he supposed to say to that? What on Earth was she thinking, telling him that?

“Are you there?” The seductive tone was all gone now, only hesitancy left.

He should answer her, but the sudden burst of panic made it quite impossible.

Because against all reason, against what he thought about just a moment ago, he knew he was going to give in.

If he wanted to, Beth said. Like there was ever an if. Like she wasn’t the only woman he’d ever fallen for. The only person he’d truly ever wanted. Like there was even a slight possibility of him telling her no.

But wasn’t it selfish? Taking her light like this, grasping at everything she offered, convincing himself it was because she wanted it—when he had nothing to give in return? When he knew she had no future with him—not the kind of future a smart college girl would be looking for. There was this part of him that was convinced she might not have realized that yet, but she would, one day. She’d wake up with a wish to explore, figure out who she was, do all that stuff people did in college. Be free. Or worse, she'll wake up and realize she wasted her life with him.

But for now, she was here, wanting him, wanting this, and for all his thinking, all his worries, Daryl simply couldn’t make himself open his mouth and address this. Was he wrong for it? For keeping it to himself? Not talking it through? For not stopping her in her tracks and asking her to rethink this shit, because she was still young and there were better guys out there to lose it to? He didn’t know. Supposed he wouldn’t know until he messed it all up, and by then, it’d be too late.

Shit, it was already too late anyway. She was in love with him, for Christ’s sake. A fact he still couldn’t wrap his head around. A fact that made him panic slightly every time he thought about it, because like hell was he good enough to be loved by Beth. He still didn’t know what he was doing, still wasn’t sure if he wasn’t making a terrible mistake allowing himself this. Being with her like that when he knew it was bound to end in disaster. In heartbreak. Because what else?

Not messing it up was one thing. One huge thing that he had some control over. But there were so many things that could go wrong here. So many things that were already wrong. Like the fact that he couldn’t even date her for real. Had to sneak her around like some dirty secret.

Like the fact that even after she told him she loved him, that she wasn’t going to leave, part of him still expected her to, and that wasn’t fair to her. He should trust her. He did trust her, he told himself over and over again, even as he kept questioning her in his mind.

And now she also wanted him to be her first, even though he wasn’t man enough to say those damned three words back to her. Even though Daryl thought again, he didn’t know the first thing about making love to someone.

And what if he hurt her? A shadow of his father was still hovering over him, still very much alive in his mind, even after his little realization on Saturday. ‘Cause even if he wasn’t turning into his dad, there was always a possibility of getting it all wrong just because of who he was, just because of his damned upbringing.

“Daryl?”

“Mhm, I’m here,” he murmured, his voice hoarse. “Just thinkin’.”

“About?”

How the hell am I ever gonna be right for ya, Daryl thought, when I’m all kinds of screwed up? 

“You,” he said instead.

Daryl could swear he could see her smile even through the phone.

“I hope it’s about all the things you would do to me if you had me underneath you right now?”

Beth’s tone was light again, and Daryl smiled, realizing his answer had to be the right one at least.

He liked it much more when she was like that—cheerful and content because of something he said, not hesitant and shy, like she expected him to go off on her again. And true to what he’d said a moment before, he thought about her now. About how Beth could be so obnoxiously joyful at times, so amazing in all the little ways—staying when he expected her to leave, reaching out for him time and time again, kissing him back like she couldn’t breathe without him either, like she was just as obsessed with him as he was with her. It made him want to stop worrying, push these anxious thoughts out of his mind, and just focus on being good to her. On not destroying this.

Only if he knew how to do that.

“Nuh-uh,” he argued back, just for the sake of teasing her, and Beth laughed.

“Liar,” she murmured, and she still sounded so gleeful. Daryl decided he was going to keep it that way. No need for her to know about all the things clouding his mind. No need to upset her with all his insecurities. Beth wanted this, Daryl reminded himself. She wanted him. Said she loved him, too—or so she claimed (three days ago, twice, not like he was countin’ or anything, ’cause he damn sure wasn’t some lovesick schoolgirl)—and that’s why he had to keep it together. Not mess it up—hell, if he knew how, but he’ll try his goddamned best. All to make it good for her. Make her happy.

No other way around it.

“Thinkin’ about what I will do to ya,” he drawled, shushing his anxious mind. A small lie to hear her laugh again, to make sure she knew he wasn’t rejecting her, wasn’t saying no to going all the way, even if he wasn’t outwardly saying yes either. “Tomorrow.”

Beth laughed under her breath, clearly satisfied with the answer, her tone a little seductive again as she uttered,

“Are you now?”

I’ll have to get rid of Merle, Daryl thought, ’cause ain’t no way I’m shushin’ ya.

“Mhm,” not a lie, he was thinking about it now. About all the little sounds he could draw from her the next time. About all the ways, in which he wanted to pleasure her. He wasn’t going to waste one minute of that damned sleepover. That’s for sure.

“Will you tell me?”

“Nah,” he muttered and smiled again, hearing her whine at him in mock indignation. “But I can tell ya about the dream I had yesterday. I swear, it was so messed up. Wanna hear?”

She did. And as he listened to her laugh, a small part of him softened. He didn’t talk much, never had, but with Beth, it was different. It didn’t feel forced. Her reactions, the way she hung on every word, made it easy. He didn’t even think twice about it, didn’t care how stupid or cheesy he might’ve sounded. She didn’t judge him for it. Somehow, she just got him, like no one else ever had. It was... strange. But in a way, it felt right. This part at least felt right to him. 

The next morning, Daryl woke up early and drove up to the church again. He wanted to get there after the first mass that began at 7:30 to be able to catch the priest and talk with him about those AA meetings they held there. Daryl didn’t believe that it would lead anywhere, but he liked to be thorough. He got there just in time to see all the churchgoers on their way out of the church. One of the altar servers was passing them some leaflets on their way back, but the priest was nowhere in sight. Daryl rushed inside, pushing himself between the crowd and ignoring the curious looks sent his way.

He was in luck. The priest was there, talking to one of the churchgoers. A middle-aged guy with small, piercing eyes and a sleazy smile. He finished his conversation with the priest just as Daryl approached them. He looked Daryl up and down while passing him by, and Daryl was pretty sure that once he did, he slowed down to hear the beginning of his conversation with the priest.

“What can I do for you, Mr…?”

“Dixon. Daryl Dixon. I’m new in town. I wanted to ask about the meetings taking place here, the AA ones.”

“Oh, the meetings are held every Wednesday and Saturday at 6PM, but if you want to know more, Mr. Dixon, I’m afraid you’ll have to wait for Father Cyrus to come. He will be the one leading the mass at 2PM. He’s the official coordinator of the meetings now.”

“Father? So it’s the church’s initiative?”

“Yes, I’m proud to say. Our dear Father Matthias was the one to start it. He was a certified therapist and he always had the well-being of our community at heart. He noticed the need for this kind of support among the people and brought this initiative forward. After he left, Father Cyrus was happy to take the necessary courses and become the head of the meetings in his stead. You can also read about it here.”

The priest walked over to the table full of leaflets near the entrance and handed one to Daryl. On the front was a picture of Father Matthias. So, it wasn’t a similarity of names after all. It was the same Father Matthias who had moved to their town a few years back, and that connection would have been a huge breakthrough if not for one thing: he was one of the people on the list of Daryl’s suspects right after Sophia died. Father Matthias definitely had the means to corrupt kids, and he was cranky enough to believe he was absolving them of some kind of guilt by killing them—that’s what Daryl thought, at least. But there was no evidence linking him to the girl Sophia had written about, and the time of death of the second victim gave him an alibi. There was a mass at 8 a.m. the day the second victim died, and Father Matthias had been the one leading it. So, despite his obsession with ridding the community of sin, Daryl had to exclude him from the list of potential predators.

But maybe he should’ve dug deeper. It was a curious coincidence, that there was a connection between him and the third victim as well.

“Oh, I thought it might have been the same Father,” Daryl said now, playing his part of a newcomer. “He was transferred to the town in which I lived up until now. I think he even led some of the church’s latest initiatives as well.”

“That sounds like him. We were very sad to see him go. He helped the youth a lot as well. Got himself involved in youth resocialization, and even after he moved, he still visited us a few times, talked to some of the AA attendees. I know for a fact he’s still in touch with some of the people he helped. But Father Cyrus is just as dedicated to the cause, I can assure you of that, Mr. Dixon.”

“Thank you, Father.”

Daryl left the church, having confirmed the dates on which Father Matthias was at the church. As he made his way to his bike, he noticed the guy from before, standing near it. Waiting for him?

“Hi, I’m sorry, but did I hear right? Did you just move here, Mr. Dixon?” The man flashed him a smile, and Daryl fought the urge to scrunch his nose in disgust.

He nodded instead. "Officer Lucian Gorman, precinct 67. Sorry for eavesdropping. Just like to keep an eye on things around here. You can understand that, I’m sure.”

Daryl nodded again, keeping his demeanor neutral as he took the hand the man extended to him.

“Yeah, I just moved here,” he said, his grip firm, a quiet challenge in his words. “Figured I’d check the place out. Not planning on stickin' around too long, but you never know.”

Daryl was talking out his head, channeling his inner Carol, always ready to push nonsense into people’s heads. He hoped that was enough because Officer Friendly, with his snarky smile and probing eyes, gave the impression of a person who liked to abuse the power the law gave him. Daryl had no wish to confirm that theory though.

“Good to know. And what made you pick our little town, Mr. Dixon?”

Daryl moved only once, and it was only because Merle set his sights on Jess’ garage. A job. But that didn’t seem like a good reason for the character he was playing.

He shifted his weight, body language tight, keeping his distance. “My girl’s the nurse at the hospital. Where she goes, I go. That’s all there is to it.”

“How…” Gorman’s eyes were locked on his face, and Daryl couldn’t shake the feeling of a predator sizing him up. It made his skin crawl, but he didn’t flinch. “Lovely. I’m sure I’ll be looking forward to meeting that girl of yours. Well, duty calls. Nice to meet you, Mr. Dixon.”

And with that, Gorman left him alone. Daryl couldn’t help but shudder as he mounted his bike. He had a better idea now of why Rick didn’t like dealing with this precinct. Gorman was the type who’d stick his nose where it didn’t belong, and he seemed to get off on making people uncomfortable. Daryl knew the type. Had a bad feeling about him.

“Hi, listen, I’ll be home a bit later,” he told Beth when he got to the diner he passed earlier. He had a few hours to kill before Father Cyrus showed up, so he might as well grab some breakfast. He wasn’t thinking about later, about after the training session, no, not at all, as he told her: “I got one more person to talk to, then I’m out. I’ll get to the clearing around 5, maybe.”

“Oh, sure, that’s fine actually,” Beth said from the other end. “My mom asked me if I could help her out with some stuff today too. 5’s perfect.”

Perfect.

What wasn’t perfect was how he spent most of the day waiting for Father Cyrus, only for the guy to never show up. Some emergency, another priest told him. Daryl gritted his teeth, pissed off he could’ve been home hours ago.

On his way out, something caught his eye—a book on a public shelf, Dealing with Childhood Abuse, the title said. Without thinking, he reached for it. As he held it, he glanced around to make sure no one was watching. It wasn’t like it was illegal to take it, right? He looked back at the cover. Hell, wouldn't hurt to read it. Perhaps it could answer some questions about his goddamned psyche.

Mounting his bike, Daryl caught sight of Officer Gorman again. He was watching him from the police car, parked at the far end of the street, but Daryl recognized him instantly, even from the distance. That nagging feeling, like something was off, lingered for the rest of the drive back to his place. The conversation with Gorman and the connection to Father Matthias kept turning in his head. He hadn’t really found anything useful, but maybe Rick could look into Father Matthias again.

By the time Daryl neared the town, his mind had shifted away from the investigation.

He left just before 2 PM, and two hours later, he still had time before his meeting with Beth. Enough to get ready for her visit later on.

Another damn sleepover.

Well...

He couldn’t change who he was, and he couldn’t change her mind about this. He was gonna try, though. Maybe mention that it didn’t have to happen so quickly, just in case she needed to hear that. But if she didn’t want to listen, he’d make sure it was as special as possible for her. Only, he had no idea how.

Daryl wandered through Walmart, picking up random things, trying to figure out what a girl like Beth would want, how she’d want this to go. But his mind went blank.

What the hell did he know about this stuff? His first time had been when he was thirteen, with a drunk seventeen-year-old from Merle’s crowd. One of the Harper sisters. She never talked to him again. He wasn’t sure if it was because he sucked, or if she’d realized how much younger he was once she sobered up. Maybe both. Either way, it was awkward as hell, and he’d spent more time in his head than in the moment. Quick and underwhelming. Made him think Merle was full of shit for calling sex the best thing in the world.

And that didn't change for years after. He was convinced either something was very wrong with him or the whole world was messed up, thinking sex was that great.

Turns out it was all him—because if other people usually felt at least half of what it felt like for him with Beth, then Jesus fucking Christ, was he missing out.

It wasn’t until he passed the section with lights and lamps that an idea hit him. Didn’t Beth say she wanted to go somewhere far from the city lights and just watch the stars? He could do that. Grab some blankets, set up a little spot in the back of his truck, get some food to go, and go stargazing with her. Afterward, they could head back to his place. He’d make sure Merle was gone first, though. No damn audience. As for the lights… maybe he could put some candles or light garlands in his room. Something to make it feel a little special, but not too much. He wasn’t gonna overdo it. The dimmed light will have an added benefit too: it will make his back less noticeable, so the scars won't put her off too much, hopefully. 

He chewed on his lip, thinking it through. Maybe he'd take both—candles and string lights. Just in case.

Daryl felt stupid buying this crap for just one night, but once the idea took root, he couldn’t shake it.

He was glad he went alone. Refused when Merle asked if he needed company. He was blushing like a damn teenager when he grabbed a pack of condoms at the checkout, almost like an afterthought. Like it wasn’t what he came there for in the first place.

“What’s that for?” Merle asked when, half an hour later, Daryl handed him the money. His brother was sitting with his legs up on the table, enjoying a free afternoon.

“A hotel room. It’s enough for one of them fancy rooms, too.” Merle eyed him carefully, clearly still confused, so Daryl explained with a sigh. “I need you to sleep somewhere else tonight.”

“And why is that?”

Merle might have been on his best behavior with Beth, but Daryl should have known his brother wouldn’t make this easy for him. He just hoped Merle would see the money and shut up, go on his merry way all happy, and not make it all even more awkward for him than it already was. But no such luck.

“Look, Beth’s staying the night…”

Merle snorted.

“So what? Never had to leave before when you were gettin’ your rocks off. Just keep the doors shut, ain’t gonna peek.”

Daryl swallowed audibly and reached back for his wallet. He pressed more money into Merle’s hand.

“Here, get dinner on me too.”

Merle scrunched his eyebrows, now even more perplexed than before.

“The hell are you actin’ all skittish for now, huh? Didn’t matter to ya none the last time, me hearin’ her singin’.” Merle barked, and Daryl grimaced. Merle, unfortunately, wasn’t done. All the heartfelt talk from the other day made him feel an even bigger need to be crass now apparently. “And what a singin’ it was, huh? Bet all the other guys fucked her all gentle and shy. ‘S why she wants a piece of your rugged ass.”

Daryl pressed his lips together, hating this conversation almost as much as the one with Gorman. Merle could be a real pain in the ass when he wanted to, but this time Daryl wasn’t going to cave and tell him why it was so important for him to be gone. Truth be told, if it wasn't Beth's first time, he wouldn’t want Merle here either, because it would still be a first time for them, but perhaps then he’d be able to figure out a better way to get rid of him. As of now, he was a ball of nerves inside, logical thinking all gone, and all Daryl knew was that Merle had to go.

Not finding a better response, Daryl reached for his pocket to take out another twenty dollars.

“Just take it. Stop askin’ questions.”

Merle didn’t grab the money this time. Instead, he tilted his head, his sharp gaze scanning Daryl like he was working out a puzzle. Daryl could feel the heat crawling up his neck and prayed he wasn’t blushing—Merle would latch onto that like a damn tick.

“And don’t talk about Beth like that,” Daryl muttered, his voice low but firm. “She ain’t like that.”

“Oh, she ain’t like that, huh?” Merle mimicked him, his lips curling into a smirk. When Daryl stayed silent, Merle leaned back in his chair, arms crossed as he considered him for a moment. Finally, he waved the money off. “Keep it. And don’t get your panties in a twist, little brother. Dear ol’ Merle will be long gone before your lady comes by.”

Daryl let out a breath he didn’t realize he was holding. Finally. One less problem. Now he just had to call Rick, figure out how to handle what he’d learned, meet Beth for their training session, and try not to drive himself crazy worrying in the meantime. Easy, right?

He was halfway to the door when Merle spoke again, his voice cutting through like a knife.

“Wait a damn minute. She ain’t like that? Ain’t like what?” Merle leaned forward, a wolfish grin curling his lips, sensing blood in the water.

Daryl froze, his back stiffening. He turned just enough to throw a sharp look over his shoulder.

“Drop it, Merle,” Daryl snapped, his jaw tight, but the flush creeping up his neck was like waving a red flag in front of a bull.

Merle chuckled, low and raspy, shaking his head as if he couldn’t believe what he was hearing. “No, no,” he said, raising a hand like he was calling for a timeout. His grin turned downright wicked, his eyes narrowing, predatory now. “All that fussin’ over her—don’t tell me she’s never been broken in.”

Daryl spun, his glare hot and unrelenting. “Shut your damn mouth,” he growled, the words coming out low and rough, like they’d been dragged over gravel.

“No shit! That’s what this is about? You gonna pop her cherry, huh?” Merle’s laughter exploded from him, loud and full of disbelief. “Damn, little brother, look atcha!”

Daryl’s fists clenched at his sides, his nails digging into his palms. He didn’t answer, but the flush creeping up his neck spoke louder than words.

Then, as if something didn’t quite add up, Merle’s brows pulled together.

“Hold up,” he said, the grin slipping into confusion. “So what the hell was all that noise about last time?”

Daryl glared at his brother and left without another word, ignoring Merle’s shouts. He went outside and stopped right next to the door.

He pulled his phone out, only to see no new texts from Beth.

She’d texted him a few hours ago to let him know that she might be late as her mother was making her run even more errands. He’d replied shortly, pressing “Ok” into the keyboard and going back to his lunch as he waited for Father Cyrus to arrive. Now he had to fight the urge to text her again.

You’ll see her in half an hour, you lovesick puppy, he scolded himself, and found Rick’s number instead. He was supposed to call him right after leaving the church, but Gorman distracted him, and then when he got home all he could think about was meeting Beth.

Rick didn’t pick up on his first try, nor did he on the second or third.

Daryl tried again when he stopped in his usual parking spot near the clearing, but there was still no reply.

Beth wasn’t there yet, so Daryl got out of the car and busied himself arranging blankets and pillows in the back of the truck. He’d bought some string lights as well, and he pulled them out now to see if they worked just like intended. Once he was done, he lit up a cigarette and decided to call Beth after all.

She didn’t pick up. Probably busy driving.

Daryl tried Rick again. Still nothing.

What was with people not answering his calls?

Daryl spent the next fifteen minutes watching the corner of the street Beth was supposed to come from. Then he tried calling her again.

Daryl 5:26 PM
You comin’?

He wrote when she didn’t pick up that call either.

When his phone went off after another ten minutes of nothing, Daryl jumped, the worry easing off him for a second before he looked down at his phone to see that it wasn’t Beth calling him back.

“Where are you?” Daryl recognized the distress in Rick’s voice right away, and he straightened his back, ready to act.

“What happened?” he answered, not wanting to disclose the location of his and Beth’s meeting spot. Rick was silent for a little too long for it to be anything good. “Another body?”

“No… not yet.” Rick took a huge shuddering breath, and Daryl’s heart picked up its pace.

Another girl missing? And so soon after the last one?

Daryl could imagine Rick now, leaning his head on the doors of his office, frustrated, trying to calm himself down. It never meant anything good when Rick was in that mood.

“I need you to come to the station. Now. Can you do that?”

“I…” Daryl glanced back at the road, his brow furrowed.

Still no sign of Beth.

The thought of checking on her nagged at him, but what was he gonna do? Pretend she asked him to look at the truck or somethin’? He huffed, shaking his head. Jesus, Dixon, what the hell’s wrong with you? You some kind of paranoid, clingy-ass boyfriend now?

Still…

“I gotta stop by Hershel’s place first,” he said, eyes fixed on the horizon. “But…”

Rick let out an exasperated sound.

“Don’t. Come straight to the station, Daryl.”

He wanted to ask, or what? but something in Rick’s tone stopped him cold. Did that Gorman guy figure things out? Was Rick catching hell for sending someone to dig around where they shouldn’t? Is that what this was about?

“Alright, alright. Give me half an hour.”

Beth didn’t pick up this time either, and Daryl let out a frustrated breath before resigning himself to writing her a text.

Daryl 5:41 PM
Gotta go and see Rick at the station. Meet me at my place after, ok?

He chewed on his bottom lip for a second, then added another line:
I’ll let Merle know you’re coming in case I’m not back yet.

Before starting the car, he tried calling her again. No answer. That’s when a nasty, sick feeling crept into his gut, coiling tighter with every passing second. And it only got worse from there.

Chapter 30: Where is Beth Greene?

Summary:

Daryl goes to see Rick and learns what happened.

Notes:

Alright, here we are – I'm going to give you one more chapter this week, as I was out of commission after Christmas and couldn't update, and because I love your response and how invested you all are in this <3 Thank you all for your lovely comments! <3
You have no idea how happy it makes me that this story gets this much love from you all <3 You're the best!

Trigger Warning: This chapter contains disturbing themes such as child abuse, violence, kidnapping, and murder.

Yep, it's going to get pretty dark. Brace yourselves. #sorrynotsorry

***

“You came,” Rick exclaimed when they met under the precinct. He didn’t sound surprised, though, but rather agitated and regretful at the same time.

“You told me to,” Daryl said simply. He thought they were both well aware by now that whenever Rick called, Daryl came. Always. No questions asked.

The bitter smile on Rick’s face told him that he was thinking about it too, but something else, something much bigger, seemed to be clouding his mind as he led Daryl into the precinct. Daryl followed him, stopping only briefly when Rick passed his office—the one they usually sat at—and turned to where the interrogation rooms were located. Daryl watched as Rick checked the room adjacent to the interrogation one, and, finding nobody behind the huge one-way mirror, locked the doors with a key. Then he opened the doors to the interrogation room for Daryl. Something heavy settled itself in the pit of his stomach, but Daryl stepped in, always ready to follow Rick’s lead.

Inside, Daryl turned to his friend to watch him close the door and check the camera in the corner of the room. Daryl glanced at it too, quickly coming to the conclusion that it was turned off.

“What’s going on, Rick?” he asked, even though an anxious little voice in his head was telling him to run instead. He was pretty sure he didn’t want to hear what Rick had to say to him.

“Take a seat,” Rick said, but Daryl didn’t move. His friend sighed, not looking at him. “Fine, have it your way then. There’s no easy way to say this, Daryl, so I’m just going to…” He took a huge breath, and Daryl felt his heart halt for a second. Then it sank in. He knew. Even before Rick spoke, he knew something bad had happened. “Beth Greene disappeared sometime between 11AM and 1PM today.”

Daryl shook his head.

“No.”

The only response he got was Rick’s watchful eyes on his face. He was clearly searching him for something, some clue, but Daryl didn’t care, the panic rising in his chest quicker than ever.

“No. She didn’t. Beth’s… No.”

He swallowed. Hard. His throat was suddenly dry.

Beth was… She was running errands for her mom. She wasn’t…

Daryl glanced at his phone, his hands shaking. Still no new messages. No phone calls. He pressed the green button before he could stop himself. This time it went to voicemail right away. His vision blurred and he had to blink again, hard, before glancing back at his friend. Daryl swayed on his feet.

No. She wasn’t gone. This was a mistake. It had to be a mistake.

Rick swallowed audibly, seeing his reaction, and Daryl knew that look well enough to realize that Rick had just confirmed some theory he had. For the first time in his life, though, Daryl didn’t care about Rick’s antics.

“She was supposed to deliver costumes for a play to the church, but never showed up,” Rick explained. “We found Greene’s car, parked on the roadside halfway there. Her phone was found in the woods, not so far away from it.”

“No.”

Daryl wasn’t sure when he dropped into the chair. He was barely aware of his surroundings, the news putting him in no state to think rationally. He felt like he was having some kind of out-of-body experience. Like this scene was playing somewhere next to him, but he wasn’t in it. Not entirely. He knew he was speaking, but the voice didn’t sound like his, and he couldn’t feel his lips moving. Couldn’t feel anything at all except for the sudden coldness that squeezed his heart, as if all the warmth Beth had been sipping into him since the very first moment he laid his eyes on her was suddenly gone.

But she wasn’t. She couldn’t be.

“She knows how to protect herself, she ain’t stupid, she wouldn’t let anyone…”

“Look, I know this news is…” Rick interrupted his mumblings, and Daryl looked up at him again from where he was staring at the ground, unseeing. Rick looked like he was using all his willpower to remain calm, and still his eyes were bigger than Daryl had ever seen them, his face scrunched in a horrified grimace.

“It must be heartbreaking to hear, and I’m sorry, but I need you to pull it together, Daryl.” His voice was full of something, something that Daryl felt like he should recognize, but he couldn’t focus enough to do so. Rick seemed miles away. “We only have a few minutes at best before I’ll have to do it the right way.”

“Do what?”

Rick closed his eyes for a second, his Adam’s apple bobbing slightly.

“Arrest you. I’ll have to arrest you, Daryl.”

He knew what those words meant, but he still didn’t understand. It wasn’t registering.

“What?”

Rick’s eyes were full of sorrow when they found him, but there was something else there too: anger, betrayal. Why was Rick looking at him that way?

“I asked you. I asked you, and you told me there was nothing to worry about. You said there was nothing there.” He sounded calm when he spoke. Too calm maybe. Then his face constricted, and it all spilled out of him. Rick turned around and punched the door behind him with such force they shook on their hinges, and Daryl felt anxiety rising to his throat at the sight.

“What are you talking about, Rick?”

The question seemed to sever the last remaining strands of peace. When Rick spun around again, it was with a shout.

“You and Beth Greene! You told me I was crazy for even suggesting…” Rick stopped himself, took a breath, clearly just as panic-stricken as Daryl felt in that moment. When he spoke again, he tried sounding calm again, his eyes hard on Daryl’s.

“Then tell me this—why did I show up to work today to find a pile of photos of you two together? Hours before she disappeared?”

Daryl blinked.

“Photos?”

“They’re being tested for prints as we speak. Once Shane gets back to me with those, we’ll be interrogating you. For real this time. And hell, I shouldn’t even be talking to you right now. I should’ve cuffed you and thrown you in a cell without a damn word. But instead, I’m standin’ here…and I just can't believe this.”

Daryl fell silent for a moment, words slowly getting to him, making him realize what kind of situation he found himself in.

This was smart, he had to admit, getting rid of him this way so that he couldn’t follow the trail. It suddenly made a lot of sense. The third murder sent him away, made Beth vulnerable…

“You need to let me go, Rick.”

Rick snorted, bemused.

“Let you go? Daryl, we unlocked Beth’s phone, found your messages to her.”

So what? He opened his mouth to ask. That didn’t prove anything. That was just…

"And then, of course, we got the lab reports back. Your DNA was found on Marlene Mitchell’s body.”

His mind went blank.

“What? I’ve never even seen that girl in my life, there’s…”

“No way, I know.”

He didn’t even know how that girl looked until they showed her on TV. What the hell was happening?!

Rick was speaking, unaware of Daryl’s internal panic.

"Listen, I might believe you didn’t hurt anyone, but it turns out I wasn’t the only one who got those photos. They were sent to everyone in this precinct.” Rick paused, his voice softening with a hint of guilt that slipped through the hard-edged authority he was trying to maintain. "But hell, maybe that’s a good thing, you know?"

“Good?”

The fuck? How was that good? Whatever was in those photos, it was private—it was theirs—and it wasn’t right.

How the hell had he missed someone taking photos of them? What was wrong with him? He should’ve been looking out for her. He should’ve been...

“Yeah, good, ‘cause I didn’t process them.” Rick’s voice dipped lower, rough with an edge of self-recrimination. His eyes flicked to the side, like he couldn’t bear the weight of his own admission, then back to Daryl, full of unspoken guilt. “I got ‘em a few hours before anyone else... and I pushed them in my drawer, locked ‘em up. Just like that. Like they were never there.”

His shoulders slumped, and his hand ran roughly over his face, a gesture that betrayed the calm front he was trying to keep.

I didn’t do my job, Rick didn’t say, but Daryl heard it all the same. The tension in Rick’s posture—the way his shoulders slumped, the way his hand ran roughly over his face—spoke louder than the words he refused to say.

"If I processed them, you'd be a suspect number one. Ain’t nobody here believes in coincidence, not with photos like that. Not with three girls already dead. They’d have torn you apart, even if Beth didn’t go missin’. But she did.” Rick’s voice cracked slightly on the last words, just enough to reveal the pain buried beneath his steady tone. He took a breath, his hand dropping to his hip as his gaze drifted past Daryl, like he was looking for answers in the empty space behind him.

“And if I’d processed those photos sooner... If I’d called Hershel... If I’d done anything but cover your ass. Wait for you to come back and explain...” He exhaled sharply, his voice dropping almost to a whisper. “Maybe she wouldn’t be missing.”

“Rick...”

Let me go. I need to look for her.

Rick cursed under his breath, his hands falling to his waist, and his head hanging low as he took a breath.

“Look, I’m sorry, but I can't let you go, Daryl. There’s evidence that puts you in close proximity to two of the victims, both Sophia and Marlene. I have a missing girl, photos of you doing things to that girl I’d rather unsee, your correspondence with her, and a few witnesses who confirmed that you were following her around.”

“Because you told me to,” Daryl interjected, his mouth moving without his will, words spilling out automatically while the rest of him was still in too much shock.

“I told you to watch her, not to f—!” Rick stopped himself, the word getting stuck in his throat. “She’s seventeen! What the hell were you thinking, Daryl?!”

Eighteen, his brain corrected unhelpfully, but it wasn’t anywhere near crucial enough to say out loud.

Didn’t change nothing. Didn’t mean nothing. She was gone.

Just… gone.

She couldn’t be. Maybe if he called her again, she’d pick up. Maybe this was some kind of mistake.

Don’t be stupid. They had her phone. The police had her phone.

And she was gone.

He had to snap out of it.

She was gone, but that didn’t mean…

He could still find her.

Daryl fell silent, his brain slowly, very slowly, transitioning from a fugue state into overthinking, overanalyzing, fueled additionally by panic. Yes, he had to find her. Had to save her. There was no time for these awful, judgment-clouding emotions, no time to guilt-trip himself. Any minute now, she could be...

No.

His heart raced as he rummaged through his brain for anything useful, anything that could save Beth.

“Look, I found something when I was in Macon. Marlene Mitchell was in AA. Met a guy there.” He was talking fast, so unlike himself, but he didn’t care because Rick wasn’t shutting him up, wasn’t kicking him into a cell. Rick was listening. Shaking his head at him, but listening. “Didn’t find him, but I found out Father Matthias was runnin’ the meetings back when she was goin’. Guy’s a damn religious nut, all about cleanin’ the town of sin—and he had access to every single one of ‘em.”

“We ruled Father Matthias out, Daryl,” Rick interrupted him. “You ruled him out because of Susanne Morgan. We didn’t find any evidence at the church or his quarters either.”

“No, I get it, but what if he ain’t workin’ alone? Ain’t no way he could walk into the Bronze and not get spotted by all the kids there. Someone’d see him. So the guy tryin’ to snatch Beth? It couldn’t be him either. Makes more sense it’s two sick bastards, not one—’specially with how different Susanne Morgan’s murder was from Sophia’s and Marlene’s.”

Daryl was speaking fast, trying to outrun the inevitable, which was Rick telling him it didn’t matter because he was still going to arrest him. Daryl had to try, though. Had to convince him. He couldn’t sit here, locked up, knowing that this monster had Beth. He had to run, had to look for her. Start with Father Matthias, go from there.

“Look, both Sophia and Marlene—killed in some kinda sacrificial way, laid out like they were bein’ offered up to somethin’ higher. Then there’s Susanne—she was punished, plain and simple. All of it screams some kinda fanatic. And Father Matthias? He fits that picture damn near perfectly.”

Rick watched him for a long moment before speaking.

“Does he? ’Cause I’ve got a lab report with your DNA all over Marlene Mitchell. I’ve got Beth’s friends and ex-boyfriend sayin’ you were followin’ her around, and yeah, I know, I told you to. But I’ve got photos of you two together in ways that ain’t exactly right. What I don’t have? Any solid evidence against Father Matthias.”

“It don’t matter,” he muttered, his voice rough and edged with barely-contained anger. His fists were clenched at his sides, knuckles white, but he didn’t care. He had to push this forward. “I know it ain’t me. You know it ain’t me.” His gaze was locked on Rick, daring him to argue, to question him further. “He’s workin’ with someone, someone's helpin’ him cover his tracks, don’t even know why.”

Daryl exhaled sharply, frustration and fear mixing in a storm behind his eyes. He didn’t want to waste time on what-ifs, but he needed to act. “But look, we gotta check him again, Rick. It’s the only lead I got, alright?”

His voice dropped, raw and full of a quiet intensity that belied the panic he was trying not to show. “I gotta find her.”

His mind raced, the fear crawling under his skin. The thought of Beth out there, missing, gnawed at him like a sickening weight.

Rick shook his head in response, his lips forming a perfect line. That’s when the knock on the door came, and Rick said, very slowly, very silently: “I’m sorry, Daryl, but you won’t be checking or finding anyone anytime soon. Because of Marlene Mitchell and the media getting involved, it’s not a local case anymore. The state’s calling the shots now. It’s out of my hands.”

Then he opened the door for Shane, who came in with a lot of paperwork and a huge envelope. When Rick was looking at Daryl with sorrow, Shane glared at him with barely-contained resentment in his eyes.

“Well, well, well, if that ain’t my favorite redneck scum. Daryl fucking Dixon! Move your ass to where it belongs, jackass.”

Daryl got up and walked to the other side of the table—the one reserved for those interrogated. It was hardly the first time he’d sat here, but he’d never felt such a strong urge to fight the policemen in front of him and run away. Every second he sat here, Beth was out there with the monster who got off on hurting girls just like her, if a little younger.

How could he sit here? He had to act. Had to move.

“Have you read him his rights yet?” Rick shook his head, avoiding Daryl’s glare.

“Well then, you have the right to remain silent, Dixon. And anything you say can be used against you in a court of law. You also have the right to contact a lawyer, but since we’re already here, why don’t we have a friendly chit-chat first, huh? You show us you’re willing to cooperate, and who knows? Maybe you can get off easy, huh?”

The biggest bullshit Daryl had ever heard.

“Let’s start with simple questions—not that you’d understand any others.” Shane showed him his teeth in a disgusting smile. Normally, that would’ve been enough to set Daryl off, but the only thing he could feel at the moment was an overwhelming fear.

“Where is Beth Greene?”

Not knowing was the worst feeling he’d ever had in his entire life.

It didn’t surprise him that Shane had already decided to find him guilty. Daryl looked at Rick, but his friend was still avoiding his eyes, clearly unhappy with what he had to do.

“I dunno.”

How was he going to find her?

“Alright, let’s start from the beginning then. Maybe that’ll jog your memory, huh?” Shane leaned in, smiling menacingly. “How long were you having sexual relations with Beth Greene? Since she turned fourteen? Fifteen?”

“Fuck you,” Daryl gritted out through his teeth, looking right into Shane’s hateful gaze. “You have the wrong guy. You need to get out there and start lookin’ for her.”

Shane snorted, and Daryl sighed, looking back to his friend now, his voice turning almost pathetically pleading.

“Don’t waste your goddamn time on me. Rick, please, just…”

Just find her. Don’t let her die.

Fuck, he couldn’t let her die.

His eyes started prickling, and it made all of it even worse because the last time he wanted to cry, she was telling him she loved him. Warm and safe in his arms.

“Ah, no. No, no, no. Don’t Rick us here.”

Shane’s expression was one of twisted satisfaction, like a long-held fantasy finally coming to life. Just as Merle had always despised Rick, Shane had a special hatred for Daryl, never passing up an opportunity to question Rick's judgment when it came to trusting him. He never even bothered to hide it, speaking about Daryl as if he wasn’t standing right there—the disdain in his voice thick and palpable whenever they were near each other. Now, with Daryl in the hot seat, Shane was reveling in it, enjoying every second of his little victory.

“See, I don’t think we have the wrong guy at all. I mean, would the wrong guy do this?”

Then Shane started pulling the pictures from the envelope one by one and laying them in front of Daryl.

“Or this? Or, oh, lookie here. Or, my personal favorite one. No, wait—this is.”

Daryl felt the color drain from his face at the sight of the photos. Beth was with him in every single one of them. One was from their clearing, with him lying on top of her, holding her down. She was barely visible behind the grass, but the next photo showed her more clearly. Beth was fighting him in that first photo, but in the second one, she raised her head a little to meet him halfway, and there was no mistaking her for anyone else. From the looks of it, it was their first kiss—the one he initiated after over one and a half months of putting great effort into not being a creep during their lessons.

Months of torture and restraint, after which he realized that this thing he felt wasn’t just of a sexual nature. It was so much more than that, and he hated that now it was here, laid out in front of the whole precinct, made into something perverted and wrong—the way he thought it was before.

There were other pictures from the clearing, with her fighting him or with him trapping her in his embrace. They were dressed the same way in each one, so Daryl figured they must have been taken on the same day.

Daryl focused, trying to remember anything from that day—anything but Beth’s laughter, her scent, the press of her body, so close, safe in his arms. She’d said she didn’t want this to end. And if he heard anything else in that moment, he dismissed it as some deer or other animal.

Was there anything unusual? Any voices or shadows other than usual?

Daryl couldn’t remember.

Where was he hiding?

What was he going to do if they stumbled into him by accident?

One thing that made him feel just a bit better was that all the photos were blurred, some of them taken from around bushes and leaves, which meant that the guy wasn’t that close to them.

He looked through the other ones.

Chills went through his body at the sight of the dark picture of him holding Beth up, kissing her under her window after she fell into his arms. The thought that this monster was there that night, watching her again—that maybe, if Daryl hadn’t come for her, she would’ve been caught by him instead—made Daryl feel sick.

The one Shane called his favorite was the worst, though.

It was the photo of them standing under the tree, close to their clearing but not there yet, and Daryl had his hand between their bodies, pushed between her thighs, his eyes on her face, and her lips open in a pleasurable moan.

Then the last one, pretty similar to the first, only this time, she had her hand around him too, and they were kissing. It was taken from some distance too, blurred but clearer than the other ones, and taken from somewhere higher—a tree branch, maybe?

Daryl scrunched his face in disgust at the notion of someone watching them there, taking photos of this intimate moment between them. He should’ve been more careful, he knew, should’ve never touched her like that on the outside.

Anger swept through him when he realized they were being followed and he didn’t even notice, too focused on her and all that was brewing between them. He never heard anyone walking behind them, never heard a shuffle of someone’s careful feet.

That monster got so close to them—twice at the very least.

It was impossible.

It was disturbing.

It was difficult to look at.

When he spoke, his voice was trembling, all emotions sweeping through him like thunder.

“Someone took those pics and mailed them to you on the same day Beth went missing.” He swallowed hard, his eyes caught on Beth’s laughing face in one of the pictures from the clearing. “Don’t you think that’s more suspicious than me being in an entirely legal relationship with her?”

“Relationship? You mean what, you’re her boyfriend or something?” Shane followed his words closely.

Daryl raised his eyes to find Rick watching him again, consideration in his gaze. Shane was still glaring, a smirk not leaving his face as he clearly tried to get a rise out of him.

Daryl shot Shane a glare, his throat tightening at the mere thought of sharing anything about his and Beth’s relationship with him—of all people. It was theirs, something that belonged only to them, and the idea of Shane knowing anything about it made his skin crawl. The idea of all those people in here, in this precinct, looking at those pictures of him and Beth, getting the wrong idea, made him sick.

What he had with Beth—this bond they’d built together—was something genuine, something he wasn’t about to let anyone mess with.

“What? Too difficult of a question?” Shane hissed, seeing Daryl shut off. “Fine. What…”

“What’s with all the wrestling?” Rick interrupted, sudden curiosity in his voice, as if he only now noticed the theme of most of these photos. He pointed to the pictures of them fighting, and Daryl sighed, closing his eyes for a moment to gather his strength.

“I—I’ve been teachin’ her how to fight. Wanted her to know how to protect herself.” A self-deprecatory snort escaped him against his will. “A whole lotta good it did, but…”

“Maybe it would work better if you focused more on training her instead of fucking her.” Shane didn’t smile anymore when Daryl’s eyes snapped to him. “Or maybe it would work better if you didn’t know every move she might make, huh?” He leaned over the table, his eyes glinting. He was clearly trying to rile Daryl up, to make him admit something in his anger. “You know, what good does training do when your kidnapper is your coach? Did you get off on it too, Daryl? Her fighting you when you took her? Were the other girls too easy for you?”

Was that why that monster went after Beth? It got too easy with the other girls? Taking her right from under Daryl Dixon’s eyes had to pose a challenge. One that this monster wouldn’t find anywhere else. And the worst part was, he won. Found a way. Took Beth away from him and made him the first suspect again at the same time. And now she was somewhere with him, and God knows what he was doing to her.

“I didn’t kidnap her.”

“No? What did you do to her then?”

“Nothin’. I didn’t do shit to any of ‘em!” He hissed, his worry flaring his anger. He clenched his fist on the table, his other hand flying out. “I was out there lookin’ for Sophia’s killer every damn day! Helping you assholes when you couldn’t do your job!”

Shane tapped his finger on his favorite photo.

“This doesn’t seem like nothing to me.”

Daryl clenched his teeth.

“Look, asshole, I didn’t do nothin’ she didn’t want me to,” he hissed through his teeth. “And she ain’t a minor. Ain’t a crime to be with her like that.”

Shane snorted, falling back in his chair, air going out of him, showing clearly that it was all an act. All to rile him up, make him talk. The cop was silent for a moment, shaking his head at him in consideration, before asking simply:

“Tell me, Daryl. Why are you hurting those girls, hm?”

Why were they even here? Rick knew he didn’t hurt Beth. He knew he wasn’t the guy. Why the hell was he allowing it? There was no time. No space for this. They had to go. They had to look for Beth.

And rationally, Daryl knew that Rick had to sit through it against his will just like Daryl did, that these were the rules he had to follow, but it was hard not to be mad at him. He should’ve told him on the phone. Should’ve given him time to find Beth.

“I ain’t hurtin’ nobody,” Daryl murmured now, eyeing Rick. Challenging him to say something. Anything.

“Yeah, well, tell that to Marlene Mitchell,” Shane said. The next photo that landed on the table in front of him was of the dead girl found in the woods the day before. She was covered in cuts and bruises, the way all of the victims were, her eyes opened in fright. It was even more stomach-turning to look at Marlene now, knowing Beth was probably with the person who did this to this girl.

“Was she your girlfriend too? You know, before you decided to use her to fulfill your other desires?”

“I've never seen that girl. Not before you found her in the woods.”

“Interesting. See, because we found your DNA on her body. How do you think it got there?”

Daryl shook his head. He had no idea how this predator got his DNA, how he managed to put it on that girl. It was sickening to think about it, even more so than the fact that this monster was watching them in the woods. He was there at least twice, and Daryl didn’t notice. What the hell was wrong with him?

Daryl’s eyes fell back down to the photos of him and Beth, a regret settling deep inside his bones.

He should’ve been there. Shouldn’t have left her alone. If he hadn’t been so caught up in his own damn errands, maybe he could’ve helped her out, driven her around town, kept an eye on her. Maybe she wouldn’t be missing now.

It was pointless to think about. There was no way he could’ve been there, no way he could’ve risked being seen with her like that. But the regret didn’t go away. It hit him hard and raw, like a punch to the gut.

“You gotta get out there, Rick.” His voice cracked at the end of the sentence, and he blinked, forcing the damn tears away. Dixons didn’t cry. “Start lookin’ for Beth.”

Please. Just please…

“We are.” It was Rick who spoke this time, and it wasn’t in his sheriff’s tone of voice either. “We have people out there looking for her. The Greenes are organizing the search party too.”

“It would go quicker if you told us where she is,” Shane added unhelpfully.

“I told you, I didn’t kidnap her,” Daryl breathed out. “And I don’t know how my DNA could get anywhere near that other girl, but it’s a set-up. You’re wastin’ time. You need to be out there lookin’ for the bastard!” Daryl moved forward, getting off his chair, overcome with nerves. Beth was out there. He had to get out there. “I’m done with this shit. I'm gettin' outta here!” 

“Sit back down!” Shane got up too, watching him with his dark, furious eyes.

“No, I ain’t! I ain’t spendin’ one more minute listenin’ to this bullshit! I have to go look for Beth, I have to…”

“What you have to do is sit the fuck down!” Shane grabbed him by the lapels and tried pushing him back into his chair forcefully, but Daryl resisted him.

“Sit down! Both of you!” It was Rick’s raised voice that made them stop the quarrel. Daryl sat down, and Shane backed off to drop back into his own chair. Rick sighed heavily. “This is what’s going to happen now, Daryl. We have the right to keep you under arrest for the next seventy-two hours. You can contact a lawyer if you want, but no judge will let you go without setting a bail, and that takes time.”

“No, you can’t, Rick,” Daryl lunged toward his friend, desperation overcoming him now. He couldn’t sit here. Couldn’t sit here and wait when she was out there with someone who could hurt her. Someone who could be hurting her now. “Listen to me, Rick, I can’t…”

He was vaguely aware of Shane moving as he took Rick by his lapels, but Rick raised his hand, stopping his partner in his tracks. He took hold of Daryl’s hands himself, their eyes meeting.

“Everyone will be looking for her, Daryl,” Rick told him, his voice sincere, as if he was making a promise. “There’s nothing more you could do anyway, and in light of the evidence, I cannot let you go. I’ll be honest with you here, alright?” It looked a little too close to the Good Cop/Bad Cop routine for him, but Daryl trusted Rick. Still trusted him, even after he’d roped him into coming here, into getting arrested like this, instead of telling him on the phone that Beth was missing. Perhaps Merle was right after all—perhaps, at the end of the day, Rick Grimes was a cop first and foremost—but Daryl didn’t have any other options here than trusting him at the moment. “The photos alone wouldn’t be enough to arrest you since they only prove that you were having sexual relations with the missing girl, but your DNA on the victim’s body? That’s not looking good.” Rick shot a short glance at Shane, then he looked Daryl in the eyes again, his tongue coming out to lick his lips in what Daryl knew was a telltale sign of Rick considering doing something stupid. Then he said, “But you may be lucky here, ‘cause things don’t exactly add up.”

“Rick,” Shane started, a warning, but Rick was apparently done with following his partner’s lead.

“Beth’s DNA was on the scene too.”

His and Beth’s DNA were on the crime scene? What the hell? That sick motherfucker, Daryl thought with a grimace, shaking his head.

Framing Daryl was one thing, but he doubted getting Beth’s DNA there was this bastard’s objective. It didn’t make any sense. And it was sick, but it was also good, because that at least meant this guy was finally making mistakes. And that meant he could be caught.

Daryl was going to catch him. And then he was going to kill him.

*

Merle, unlike everyone else Daryl tried calling that afternoon, picked up on his first try.

“Pigs were here." was the first thing Merle said to him. "Tryin' to get me to let ‘em check the house. What the hell’s goin’ on, brother?"

“It’s Beth.” Daryl muttered, his voice rough and cracking. “She’s missin’. They arrested me and I can’t…”

The words tasted like acid in his mouth. The reality of it—the fact that she was gone, taken by that son of a bitch, was eating away at him. Daryl couldn’t push the thought out of his mind: what if she was already gone? Not just missing, but never coming back?

Merle let out a long, sharp breath, his usual bravado gone for a moment.

“Shit, alright, I’m getting the boys. You got any leads? Anything you need me to follow up on?" Daryl bit down on his lip, eyes squeezing shut as he tried to control the damn lump in his throat. His hands shook as he gripped the phone tighter. He wasn’t gonna break.

He wished Merle didn’t sound so soft when he spoke next:

“Brother?”

 It made Daryl’s chest feel tighter.

Daryl couldn’t get the words out, couldn’t form them between the tightness in his throat and the raw ache in his gut. He just squeezed his eyes shut harder, digging his nails into the skin of his palm, hard enough to draw blood. The sharp sting was the only thing that kept him from breaking down completely, the only thing that kept him from screaming.

*

This time when Beth woke up, having no memory of what happened, she was yet again lying in a bed. Unlike the first time, after that party at the Bronze, she knew something wasn’t right the second she opened her eyes. The ceiling was wrong, the smell around her strange, and there were voices, arguing, somewhere in the distance.

Beth whined silently when pain shot through her skull as she raised her head. She was lying on what seemed to be a hospital bed, and she wasn't alone in the room. The strange smell was coming from the corner, in which a small brown-haired girl sat, the lower part of her dress and her legs covered in pee. She was shaking, crying silently with her head hidden in her arms.

A sickening feeling settled itself in the pit of Beth’s stomach.

“... was a mistake! That biker of hers came to my town! MY TOWN!” Beth didn’t know this voice, but when she heard the one that responded, she gulped.

“Shh, no need to shout,” the voice said, warm but loud and a bit scolding. “He’s not a problem anymore, we took care of it, didn’t we?”

Wait. Are they talking about Daryl? Please, no, God please, don’t be talking about Daryl.

Beth felt tears prickling at her eyes and soon tears were running down her cheeks. The fear that overcame her was so sudden, so foreign, and so overwhelming, she felt on the verge of hyperventilating. She was crying for them both, for Daryl and whatever they did to him, and for herself, because if she was here, if they were who she thought they were, she was as good as dead.

God, but she didn’t want to die.

The other guy was silent for a long moment before he spoke again, his tone calmer, but still loud enough for her to hear him clearly. They either didn’t care if they were being heard or didn’t know the walls were that thin.

“Well, I hope she’s worth it, ‘cause we sure went through a lot of trouble for her just now.”

“She is. I told you, you don’t know her like I do. She was always so sweet. So quiet. Writing in her little journals. So... interesting.” Beth gulped again, her heart squeezing painfully, panic surging through her. She felt frozen in her spot, listening to them talk about her. “It’s such a shame. Such a shame, Lucian, for her to turn up this way. Rotten.”

The warm voice turned icy so suddenly, Beth shuddered. Axel, she thought, suddenly remembering, his name was Axel. And all the kids knew him. Always so goofy and kind, giving out sweets and jumping through fences to retrieve lost balls. He took care of gardens for all the schools in the area when she was in kindergarten and then middle school. But then the accident happened. His wife and daughter died, and Beth never saw him again. She thought he moved out.

“We need to set it right again.”

“No, you need to set it right again,” the other one, Lucian, said. “I did my part. Put that fuckin’ transmitter in her phone so that you could always know where she is. Hell, if I had succeeded in taking her that night, you wouldn’t even need it, right? That’s how great good ol’ Lucian is.”

Oh my God. Beth’s heart halted to a stop as the night at the Bronze resurfaced in her mind. She still didn’t remember it. But, oh God, all this time? They were tracking her phone? Following her around? How could she not notice? And how, on Earth, didn’t Daryl?

Beth closed her eyes, a quiet sob escaping her. No, it wasn’t Daryl’s fault. It wasn’t like he was always with her, Beth thought, and the fact that they were tracking her phone didn’t mean they were walking around behind her all the time. They didn’t have to. They knew where she was anyway.

“Yes, of course. You are.” Axel said, and Beth opened her eyes, fear and disgust mixing with disbelief.

He was such a lovely person. She remembered that time Shawn had an accident on his bike. Almost drove himself under a car, fell off his bike, and broke his arm. Beth was driving right behind him. The driver jumped out of the car and started shouting at them something fierce, grabbed at Shawn, and that’s when Axel intervened. He got rid of that man, firmly but without violence, and took them both to the hospital. Waited till mom and dad came. What the hell happened to that guy? Was he always like this? Hiding all this brutality behind the friendly smiles? And who was that other guy? What was going on?

“Yeah, and you wouldn’t know the first thing about this DNA shit, if it wasn’t for me too, right?”

“Right. I wouldn’t.”

Beth’s eyes fell on the girl sitting in the corner. She looked dirty, like she’d been here for some time. She couldn’t be much older than Sophia from the looks of it, and Beth felt for her more than she felt for herself. What did she ever do to deserve this? Those fucked-up bastards, Beth thought, anger flaring inside her so suddenly, she forgot to be scared for a hot second.

“Perfect. So we have an understanding. I did much more than I usually do for you,” Lucian said, and Axel had to answer him non-verbally because even though he didn’t say anything else, Lucian continued into: “But that’s where it ends, so don’t try robbing me into your sick plays here, got it? I don’t want any part of it. What I do want is her.”

No, she thought. That’s not happening. Whatever he means. No. If she goes, if she has to die here, she’s going to die on her own terms. She felt this thought so violently and with her whole being, it made her move.

Beth found herself shaking as she slowly rose from the bed, her movement catching the attention of the young girl on the ground. She put her finger to her mouth, signaling to the girl to stay silent.

“Of course. Like always. Well, not always I suppose, but Sophia was special, you know? Deserved to go.” Axel sounded wistful as he said that, and Beth shuddered again, thinking about poor Sophia, dying on the day of her disappearance. “She’ll be waiting here for you every day for a week.”

Beth shuddered again but didn’t stop. She found herself moving through the room that, excluding the hospital bed, looked like a regular basement, with shelves filled with jars, cans, and cobwebs. There was a huge chimney in the back, a staircase leading up, on the left, next to the corner in which the girl was sitting, and a heavy pair of doors that at the moment separated them from their kidnappers. No windows. Beth started searching the shelves with her eyes, looking for something, anything she could use to defend herself with just as Lucian said:

“No. Two months with this one.”

There was nothing. Jars. Cans. More jars. She grabbed one of the glassy containers. It had some liquid inside. Beth weighed it in her hand.

“Lucian,” Axel sounded perplexed now. “She needs to be punished.”

Beth’s eyes fell shut. No, she won’t cry again, she thought.

She grabbed another jar. If they attacked them together, then maybe…? Beth cast a glance at the girl in the corner. She was still shaking, watching her with puffy eyes.

Beth put the other jar back down. No, that wasn’t happening.

She eyed the staircase. The doors up there were probably locked, but perhaps if she made enough of a ruckus, the other girl could grab the keys. Run away. That is, if she’s not too terrified to move.

“Always time for that, you waited so long, you can wait a little longer, while I get my prize, can’t you?” The voice came closer now, and Beth stilled. Her time was running out.

She looked at the glass in her hands. At this moment, Beth Greene knew two things for sure.

One. After all these lessons with Daryl, she was painfully aware that nobody is going to wait for her to calm down. Nobody will give her the time to get ready. She needed to act. To do something. If she wanted any shot at survival, Beth Greene had to pull herself together and be ready to attack.

Two. She wasn’t going to survive.

No matter all the tricks Daryl taught her, no matter how fast she was able to run or how strong she’d gotten over the summer, she had no chance against two grown men. If there was one guy, if there only was one, she could’ve made it, maybe, but she used all her luck that night at the Bronze when Daryl snatched her back from the car. And now here she was. Locked in a basement. No weapon. Just this stupid jar. She could break it and pick up the pieces, or try to break it on one of their heads, but either way… she wasn’t getting out of this alive.

Her fingers trembled around the jar as she cast one last glance at the girl in the corner. If nothing else, Beth could give her a chance to escape. That would have to be enough.

The footsteps stopped outside the door. Beth’s breath hitched. She braced herself. Whatever happened next, she was determined to go out fighting.

Chapter 31: You're not a fighter, sweetheart

Summary:

Daryl is in trouble. Beth is... in even bigger trouble. How are they going to get out of this?

Notes:

Since I'm not sure how my schedule will look next week, I decided to post one more chapter this week ^^
Yeah, crazy, huh?
Tbh I just can’t wait for you all to know the whole story – but I’m also sorry that it’s coming to an end. Only four chapters left after this one, which is actually more than I thought this story would ever have (It was 30 chapters first, then 34 and now it's 35, because I realized yesterday that I made a mistake with the numbering XD).
Still, we're very close to the finish line now and all I have is hope that you're going to be satisfied with how it all ends <3
I'll try to update as soon as possible <3

But I’m sorry to say: this one’s going to hurt too. Additional trigger warning below.

Trigger Warning: This chapter contains disturbing themes such as child abuse, violence and sexual abuse, kidnapping, and murder.

***

The bail was set for Daryl’s release, and it was purposely set high enough for him not to be able to pay it. No new evidence was found; Merle and the rest of the Feral Angels were on the lookout, the search parties were being organized, and Father Matthias was still there, leading Masses like nothing happened. Rick questioned him about his whereabouts, especially since Beth had been coming to see him when she went missing, but nothing came out of the conversation.

“He was already gone by the time you called me,” Merle told Daryl when he came to visit him in the morning. Daryl hadn’t slept through the night, but it made no difference—he was so stressed out, his brain was working overtime now, no breaks in between. “Had my guys sittin’ on the church and his place, but he didn’t drag his sorry ass home till this mornin’. And get this—he’s got himself a black eye and a split lip. Somebody clocked him good.”

Daryl scrunched his nose in a grimace.

“I know. Rick talked to him today. Said the bastard claimed he went to check on one of his AA guys, tryin’ to help with some breakdown or somethin’, and the guy turned on him. Didn’t even press charges.”

“What a load of bullcrap. Tell ya what—I’ve got guys tailin’ him now. That Bible-thumper won’t take a piss without me knowin’, you can bet on that.”

Daryl nodded. It was comforting, knowing his brother had his back, but he still felt jittery. He’d much rather be there following Father Matthias by himself. Doing anything would be better than this—sitting on his ass, while she’s out there with a murderer and a rapist.

"Rick said we ain’t got enough to go on with this lead."

Merle snorted.

“Screw Grimes.”

Daryl ignored him.

"Look, Father Matthias admitted he knew Marlene Mitchell, but he claims he ain’t had no contact with her since he left that church in Macon. Father Cyrus down there backed him up, and there ain’t nobody else sayin’ different."

Merle glanced at the guard standing next to the door and then leaned in to whisper, “You want me to rough him up a bit? See if I can get him talkin’?”

Any other time, Daryl would smile; it just didn’t happen often for Merle Dixon to be following Daryl’s lead like that, not doing anything he wasn’t told to do. It was usually the other way around. This time, however, Merle not only took to finding Beth in stride but promised not to do anything against Daryl’s wishes, too. Where this new consideration was coming from, Daryl had no idea.

“Nah, I don’t think he would… and I can’t have you gettin’ locked up, too,” Daryl sighed, hiding his head in his hands. He hated every single second of this. Of not knowing. “I gotta get outta here.”

He kept repeating that, even though it would have to be a true miracle for them to let him go. Rick said there was no way. Told him if he didn’t make him come to the precinct, they would have to send people after him, bring him by force, and that it would be out of Rick’s hands anyway. Rick didn’t want this, not only because he didn’t want cops chasing him and tackling him down, but also because he needed every hand on deck looking for Beth. When Rick explained it to him, Daryl could only nod in understanding, in thanks. He got it. How it was more important to Rick to have people on the lookout than chasing his dumb ass around. He knew how that wouldn’t help. But that didn’t make him feel any better. Because how could he be here when his girl was in danger? Beth needed him.

“Mhm, you want me to help with that too?” Daryl glanced at his brother, snorting at the absurdity of the question. They didn’t have enough money to get him out, that was for sure. Merle didn’t look like he was joking, though.

“I mean it, little brother. You wanna get out, I’ll get you out. Just say the word. Can’t promise it’ll be legal, though.”

“No.” Daryl shook his head. "Rick needs all his people right now. Can’t have him sending anyone after us instead."

Merle only rolled his eyes.

“You’re a popular guy, Daryl,” Rosita told him no more than two hours later. This time it was Carol who came to visit him, and upon seeing her, Daryl broke down completely. He crashed into her, a sob tearing out of his throat as his knees buckled underneath him. For some time, all he could do was repeat his sorry’s. Daryl knew he had to tell her, wanted to even, but the words just didn’t want to come, his throat closed and hands shaking. But maybe that was alright too. Maybe he didn’t need to tell her anything at all, because Carol held onto him right back, crying with him and whispering soothing words to him, as if she’d known.

The last time he cried must have been when he was a teen, not that he could recall. But he did remember the last time he cried in front of someone. His dad was tearing into his back, and the pain was too hard to bear. The more he cried, the harder Will Dixon hit.

Shut up, shut up, you fucking sissy!

The memory was distant now. Will Dixon’s voice couldn’t reach him now, not even if he was alive and standing over him.

“It’s okay, Daryl,” Carol whispered, her voice soft yet unwavering, a steady anchor in the storm of his grief. Her arms stayed wrapped tightly around him, her hand threading gently through his hair, as though she could smooth away not just his current pain but all the scars life had etched into him. “You hear me? It’s okay. We’re going to find her.”

How? How are they going to? He’s stranded. He can’t do anything from here.

It took some time before he managed to take control of his own body again. Shame splashed through him as he glanced at the door, where Rosita had stood before. She was gone now. It was only him and Carol here.

They sat across from each other for a long moment, just coming down from it, before Carol reached out again. She took hold of his hand, and when he chanced a glance at her, she was wearing a warm but sad smile, her eyes full of affection.

“So, you and Beth, hm?” Daryl’s breath hitched, and he dropped his gaze, not sure if he could take seeing the expression on her face when he confirmed it, nodding lightly. But there was no disgust, no anger in her tone as she continued, “I should’ve known there was a reason you were so defensive about her.”

“Wasn’t…” he started, looking up, but a quirk of her eyebrow stopped him. “Alright, yeah, I was, but it wasn’t ‘cause… I didn’t know…” He took a shuddering breath. “It ain’t true what they’re sayin’ about it. The cops. They’re makin’ it look like I was abusing her for years or somethin’. Ain’t like that." Daryl shook his head, looking down again. "And it only started this year. I—uh, she’s…”

Carol squeezed his hand in hers, making him stop yet again.

“It’s okay, Pookie. I understand,” she said, then supplied when he shot her a surprised look: “Or at least I’m trying to.” She smirked at him now, and Daryl could only look back mortified as she added, “I mean, I knew she liked you. Had this look in her eyes when she looked at you, like a rainbow was shining outta your ass.”

Daryl felt his cheeks darken, his hand twitching under hers as he fidgeted in his seat.

“Stop.”

“What? Don’t tell me you didn’t notice.” He gave Carol a look. Any other time, this teasing remark, this reaction, would’ve been everything he wanted. This kind of wordless acceptance. But it only brought pain now. Thinking about the way Beth looked at him. Not knowing what she was looking at now. Whether she was looking at anything at all. Carol was watching him now, thoughtfully, as she said, “I just didn’t think you’d ever… She’s so young, Daryl.”

It felt like Carol wanted to say more, like there was some kind of question there she didn’t ask, but Daryl didn’t doubt she would go back to it later. After. When he’s not on the verge of falling apart. She’s going to prod and poke and tease until he explains it all to her one way or another. He’d be worried about it if thinking about later didn’t raise an entirely different kind of anxiety.

“I know,” he whispered back, his voice breaking at the admission, eyes downcast. He wished she wasn't, many times. But it hardly mattered now.

She’s been missing for around twenty-two hours now. Two hours left of those most crucial twenty-four hours after going missing. The police had nothing. Rick told him they found some kind of electronic device attached to Beth's phone, a GPS—no prints, but they were trying to find out where it was bought. By whom. There was nothing else. No trace. Perhaps if he went to the woods, to the spot she was taken from, perhaps he could track her.

Yeah, right. You think you have a better chance than the trained dogs?

“But, you and her,” Carol said, and Daryl felt his heart squeeze. Just stop talking, he pleaded with her, just stop talking, please. “You have something special. That’s what you were trying to tell me?” Daryl nodded, eyes prickling again. He knew she wanted to know about this because it was important to him, because Beth was important, and Carol was just finding out about this. But it hurt something fierce to be talking about this now. With Beth gone like that. Something must have shown on his face because she changed the subject a little. “Rick told me he feels bad he has to keep you here, you know?”

“Yeah, well, that’s his own damn fault, ain’t it?” Anger felt refreshing. It was familiar. More normal than this other thing he felt, like he was breaking on the inside. Like something in him cracked the moment she disappeared and it was splitting him open more and more with every minute of her being gone.

“He did what he thought was right. He made a mistake. Happens to the best of us, right?” Daryl recognized the jab for what it was instantly. He made at least a few mistakes himself in the span of the last few months, but one was way more damaging than the others.

“He told you about the photos.”

It wasn’t a question, but Carol answered him anyway.

“Mhm, never took you for the rip-your-shirt-off-and-take-you-against-the-tree kind of guy.”

“Jesus,” he muttered, the tip of his ears catching on fire, and Carol snorted. Why did she always feel the need to say the most embarrassing thing out loud? Couldn’t she just give him a break for once? As if he wasn’t beating himself up for it, all by himself, without her teasing remarks.

“But do you want to know what else Rick told me?” No, he didn’t. Carol’s voice turned soft as she said, “He thinks you’re in love with her.” Daryl’s eyes snapped up to Carol’s, surprised. She smiled again, seeing him looking, almost as if she wanted to say, gotcha. “Are you?”

He’s never going to tell Beth now, is he? A sound akin to a sob wracked through him at the thought. He should’ve told her. That Saturday. Should’ve just gotten over himself and told her.

Carol hauled herself back to her feet again. The next thing he knew, she was hugging him again.

“Beth’s a tough girl, Daryl. She’ll be okay.” Hell, he didn’t doubt she was tough. He knew that better than anyone else. But did that mean she was going to be okay? He didn’t know. “We’re going to get her back. You’re going to get her back, Daryl.”

“Me? I ain’t doin’ shit from here—” The knock at the door cut him off. Carol straightened, pulling away just as the door opened with a low creak.

A tall woman stepped in. Her lean frame carried an air of quiet strength, her dark dreadlocks framing an expression that was both sharp and measured. She wore a tailored black suit, and a leather messenger bag was slung over one shoulder, her hand resting casually on the strap.

She nodded to Carol in acknowledgment, her brown eyes warm yet direct. “Carol,” she greeted, her voice smooth but firm. Then her gaze shifted to Daryl, assessing but without judgment.

“Mr. Dixon,” she said, her tone steady, no-nonsense. “I’m Michonne Hawthorne. I’m your lawyer now.”

She paused just long enough to let the weight of that sink in, her gaze steady and unflinching. That couldn’t be true, though. He definitely didn’t have the kind of money to afford a lawyer looking like that.

“Don’t worry about money,” she said, as if she could read his thoughts off his face. “Aaron’s a friend, and I owe him one.”

As if that explained anything.

Daryl shot a questioning glance at Carol just as his friend went to get up. What the hell was going on?

Michonne’s head tilted slightly when he looked at her again, her voice carrying a quiet force. “So, here’s the deal: are you ready to walk out of here with me?”

Daryl didn’t answer, his eyes returning to Carol, who smiled at him knowingly and asked,

“You said you didn’t want anything illegal, right?”

Damn, Merle...

“Actually, it’s gonna be a lil’ illegal,” Michonne corrected, then winked at them, some playfulness slipping into her voice as she muttered, “Don’t tell my boss.”

Michonne then explained to him that she was going to take him to another precinct for a polygraph test—she had a judge-issued permission for him to be tested. Only, he was never going to get to the other precinct.

“But… why?” Daryl felt like somebody was pulling his leg. “Why the hell would you take that risk?”

“Because there’s no risk for me here. Your friend, Rick Grimes? He will not file a report on this. The other precinct was not verified, and the moment Beth Greene is found, you’re going to turn yourself in, and we’ll all pretend you were here the whole time.” Daryl shook his head in disbelief. “Look, I’m only here to make this look legit. Anyone sees us walking through the corridor, anyone thinks to check if I’m telling the truth, they’ll find me in a system listed as a real lawyer. Nobody will think to question it after.”

Daryl shot Carol a look of disbelief. Why were they doing this? Why help him run away from the precinct? He couldn’t wrap his head around it still. He knew they were good people—Aaron, Carol, Rick—the kind of friends he’d never thought he’d have. But to help Merle break him out of an arrest? That wasn’t something he ever thought he’d see.

“I wouldn’t want to be locked up, not knowing where my daughter is. Maybe it’s not much, having that chance to search for someone..." Carol explained, seeing the look on his face. "but if there’s even a chance you can find Beth before something happens, you deserve to take it, Daryl.”

Daryl swallowed hard. He could only nod, his words caught in his throat.

A few minutes later, when Rick saw them passing through the corridor on their way out, Daryl stopped, his heart rising to his throat. They looked at each other for a long moment, the way they often did, and then Rick nodded at him, both a permission and apology, before turning his head in another direction. Perhaps he was much more than just a cop after all.

Merle was waiting for him outside. He was on his bike, and next to him, Zach was dismounting Daryl’s bike.

“Here you go, man,” he thrust the keys into Daryl’s hands, then handed him his crossbow, looking all sorts of uncomfortable before meeting his eyes and mumbling, all red, “You should’ve told me, you know? If I knew, I wouldn’t have kissed her...”

Daryl shot a glance at Merle. So, everyone knew about him and Beth now? His brother just shrugged, his expression as far from apologetic as one could get.

It seemed like a whole lifetime had passed since Daryl cared about Zach’s little infatuation with Beth. Since it mattered that Zach kissed her that one time. But Zach looked like he wanted the Earth to swallow him whole, like he thought Daryl might hold some big-ass grudge against him now, and Daryl just couldn’t help himself.

“But you did, didn’t ya?” he murmured, putting some of that Dixon ‘charm’ in his voice and giving him a hard stare. He could hear Zach’s teeth click when he pressed his mouth close, his eyes dropping down before glancing up, all anxious. Daryl snorted, dropping the act. “Don’t sweat it, Zach. I ain’t gonna kill ya.” He reached out to pat him on the back, and Zach just breathed a sigh of relief when Daryl added, “Probably.”

He moved then, not wanting to waste any more time, feeling like every single second that he wasn’t moving was too long now that he finally got out. A little over an hour. In one hour, she would have been missing for twenty-four.

“What? What do you mean probably?” Zach called out, but Daryl didn’t answer him, too busy starting the bike and following Merle to the church, where the other guys, Santucci and Garry, were watching Father Matthias.

“So, what’s the plan here?” Merle asked once they stopped at the back of the church and Daryl got off the bike.

The truth was, Daryl didn’t have one. He didn’t think he’d even get this far. Didn’t think there was any way he was getting out of that precinct. But here they were, and he had no idea what he was doing. The only thing he did know was that running around the woods the way he did when Sophia disappeared wasn’t going to help. He had to find the guy who took Beth, and the only person he connected with all the victims was Father Matthias. If it wasn’t Beth, if he felt like he had more time, he’d just plan a stakeout, wait for him to leave, and follow him to the location where he kept the girl.

But it was Beth.

He had Beth.

And Daryl didn’t feel like he could just sit here the whole day and wait. There was this urgency he felt, pushing him to act, to find her as soon as possible.

He looked at Merle.

“We’re gonna make him talk,” he said, and Merle offered him a menacing little smirk in return.

“Alright. Let’s make the bastard talk.”

They ambushed him in the sacristy. Just the two of them.

“You can’t be here,” Father Matthias said to Merle, then took a step back upon seeing Daryl emerge as well. “No, you’re in jail.”

“Clearly not,” Daryl hissed, all the emotions he felt upon learning about Beth’s disappearance turning into rage the moment he laid his eyes on Father Matthias. The feeling was so strong, so overwhelming, it almost made him stagger. “Where is she?”

“Who?”

“Don’t act fucking dumb!” Daryl grabbed the man and pushed him against the wall with such force, he’d be worried he cracked the priest’s skull open, if there were any rational thoughts left in his mind. “Where is Beth?!”

“Beth? I don’t…” Confusion peaked through the fear as Father Matthias struggled to pry Daryl’s hands away from his lapels. “You’re the one that took ‘er! What do you mean—what do you…?!”

Daryl slammed him back against the wall again, breathing hard, his hands shaking both from anger and desperation.

“Where is she?!” he repeated, and Father Matthias whined in response.

“I don’t know! Let go of me or I’m gonna sue! Gonna put you in jail, Dixon! I swear, I…”

“Aww, should’ve tried actin’, preacherman.” Merle grabbed Daryl’s shoulder and pulled him slightly back. Daryl let go of the priest, his chest seizing from emotions, as he stepped back, letting Merle get to the man instead. “You as good with singin’?”

“Look, I don’t know anything, I swear, I don’t…”

Daryl closed his eyes at the unmistakable, unexpected sound of a bone cracking. The priest screamed—no, shrieked—in pain, and when Daryl opened his eyes, Father Matthias was holding onto his hand, his finger bent unnaturally, as he cried. A sudden sense of dread settled in the pit of Daryl’s stomach as he watched this man, who he thought was a devil in disguise, now crumple before Merle.

“P-please, s-st-top, please, I don’t know anything, I d-don’t…”

The priest, once standing tall with a façade of authority, was now hunched against the wall, his back curved and shoulders slumped as though trying to make himself as small as possible. His hand, still clutching the injured one, was shaking violently, his knuckles white with the effort of holding on to what little composure he had left. His breath came in shallow, ragged gasps, each one faster than the last, his wide eyes never leaving Merle’s.

“Where is she?” Merle asked, way more collected than Daryl ever could be, and Father Matthias shuddered violently. So clearly a prey, looking down the lion’s mouth.

“I don’t know, I don’t know, I promise, I don’t know.”

Daryl felt all the anger, all that pent-up rage, leave him as despair took its place. He made a mistake, he realized as he looked at that man. He could never be the guy they were looking for. He was just a spineless coward, pouring out judgment and hatred like a broken dam. Not a killer.

Daryl had nothing.

He failed Beth. He had no idea where she was or how to find her, and the person he thought was behind this… wasn’t.

Beth was going to die. Because of him. Because he didn’t solve this case. Too busy fooling around with her to fucking care.

“Merle…” he tried, but his voice came out too quiet, barely even a hoarse whisper.

“No? Well, one down, nine to go,” Merle said, and Father Matthias made a strangled noise, close to a bleeding animal. “Or maybe we should try dancin’ now?”

Merle pulled a lighter out of his pocket and clicked it open. Father Matthias pushed himself even more tightly against the wall at the sight of fire.

“Merle,” Daryl reached out, barely even aware of his own actions. Merle stopped what he was doing, glancing back to see the look on Daryl’s face. Daryl shook his head.

Merle stepped back, and Father Matthias simply slid down the wall, shaking. They both watched him in silence for a moment while Daryl struggled with his emotions.

He had to keep trying. He had to keep going. For Beth. He knew. But… he had nothing.

“Daryl…” Merle started, but fell silent when Daryl shook his head again. Then Merle startled, and a second later, Daryl heard voices coming from the church. “Shit, somebody’s here. Be quiet. I’m gonna take care of it. You better not move, Holler Boy."

And with that, he was gone, leaving him with Father Matthias. That's when Daryl's legs gave out under him, and he crumpled to the ground, landing on his knees.

“I thought I had it all figured out,” Daryl croaked, more to himself than to the man in front of him. He’d never felt so lost in his life. “I was so sure…”

Father Matthias didn’t answer, but Daryl didn’t expect him to. Hell, he wouldn’t be in the mood for any conversations if somebody broke his finger like that, either.

“You knew all of ’em, had Sophia and that other girl in the church’s choir,” Daryl mumbled, his eyes dropping to his hands as he slid down from his knees to his ass, his head dropping and arms hunching. “And then Macon? It just… It had to be you.” Father Matthias was still sobbing quietly next to him, but Daryl barely even heard him as he thought about Beth, his voice breaking. “Beth was comin’ to see ya…”

Silence.

And then…

“I had Father Gabriel call Annette,” Father Matthias’s voice shook when he spoke. “When she did—didn’t come…” Even in pain, he still managed to sneer at Daryl, accusation evident in his voice. “They started lookin’ for her, ’cause of me.”

Daryl raised his eyes at him. Father Matthias was watching him with contempt, his eyes puffy from tears, face red and hands still trembling, and for the first time in his life, Daryl didn’t even care for his own weakness to be seen. And by this man, of all people.

Daryl rubbed at his face, shaking his head and just… praying silently for any sign, anything to help him find her. He didn’t even believe in God. Not really. But...

God, please… Just please.

“I’m pressing charges. Against you an’ your brother. Just so you know, Dixon,” Father Matthias said, his voice still trembling, but the words clear, fear slowly descending. Daryl just nodded, not really caring for any charges. If he’s not going to find her, if she’s… dead? They could send him on death row for all he cared. Hell, maybe he’ll ask for it himself.

“I should call the police anyway.”

Daryl raised his eyes at Father Matthias and blinked, taken aback by the sudden lack of hatred in his eyes. Or, well, the hatred was still there, more alive than ever, only now Father Matthias was looking at him with something way more troubled than that. Some hesitancy. Consideration. And… fear again?

“There was this man in the meetings I ran, back in Macon. He became Marlene Mitchel’s sponsor. He, um—he was good with children, teens. Troubled ones too. I liked him.”

Daryl held his breath in and could swear his heart came to a halt, even though he had no idea why Father Matthias chose to tell him this. The man swallowed hard, his hand pressing down on his finger, and his face constricting in pain. He pushed through, though.

“But then I… I noticed…” Father Matthias took a shuddering breath. What? What did you notice? Daryl wanted to ask, but he was afraid that if he talked, Father Matthias might remember who he was recalling this to. Might change his mind. So he waited. “She was fourteen, you know. Fourteen and already into drugs. Living in some slums with other… I just, I thought having an adult take care of her… I thought he was treating her like his own daughter.” Father Matthias flinched when the doors opened and Merle walked in again.

“Shh,” Daryl raised his hand to Merle, before his brother could speak. Then he grunted at Father Matthias. “Go on.”

Father Matthias swallowed hard, his eyes on Merle for a second longer, fearful in an entirely different way.

Then he looked down to find Daryl’s eyes.

“I noticed bruises and cuts on her. Then other signs... He was abusing her.”

Father Matthias fell silent after that and Daryl had no other option, but to ask:

“What did you do about it?”

Father Matthias was always pale, but when Merle broke his finger, his face turned gray even, sick. That’s why now, when it turned red, it was even more prominent, even more obvious. He dropped his gaze from Daryl’s eyes, his Adam’s apple working hard.

“Nothing,” he admitted finally. “I mean, I confronted him about it. He begged me not to tell anyone. Promised he’d leave her alone, get himself under treatment…”

“And what?” Merle snorted, mad. “You fuckin’ believed him?”

“Yes. No. I don’t… I decided to give him a few days. But then… police knocked on my door. Accused me of touching her. They had witnesses. No idea how, but… They offered me a deal. I could get transferred and keep my reputation, be a free man or… not.” Father Matthias raised his eyes at Daryl. “So here I am.”

Daryl licked his dry lips, trying to stay calm even though it was harder and harder with every word that left Father Matthias’s mouth.

“Why didn’t you tell that to the cops when they found Marlene?” Daryl needed to know.

Father Matthias just stared at him for a long moment.

“I didn’t think it mattered. Marlene stayed helping at the church after I left. Father Cyrus basically adopted her, not legally, of course, but when I spoke to him a few months back, he mentioned she had a… a girlfriend. She wasn’t seeing that man anymore.”

Daryl didn’t understand.

“But now it matters?”

“Yes. Because I—I—uh… saw him here around the time Sophia was found. He came to one of my masses. I didn't think anything of it, but then I saw him yesterday, driving by the church, and I remembered… he lived here. Before Macon. He talked about schools here. Worked at one of them maybe? I heard him telling Marlene about the house he still had here, how they could go back.”

“Yesterday? Why, why didn’t you call the cops?!”

Father Matthias gave him a look of disbelief.

“And why would I? They caught you! I thought…” Father Matthias fell silent, but he didn’t need to finish that sentence. Daryl knew what he thought.

“What was the guy’s name,” Merle demanded, and Father Matthias flinched again at the sound of his voice.

Father Matthias looked between the two of them with the same look of apprehension he had before, as if he wasn’t sure if telling them all that was a good idea.

Why he decided to start speaking at all was beyond Daryl’s understanding, but he could barely even focus on anything but Beth right now.

“Please,” he uttered, surprising the three of them. Father Matthias’s eyes snapped to his. “Please, it’s been a day since she… and if there’s any chance that this guy has her, I have to know. Just, tell me, please.”

He wasn’t sure if it was the pleading or something in his face, or perhaps if Father Matthias simply liked Beth enough to want to give her any chance at survival he could, but he nodded and said:

“Axel Peterson.”

*

Beth woke up with the throbbing pain in her skull again. This time, though, she knew exactly what had happened. She stood next to the door as they came in. She didn’t even take a good look at the man who walked in first before she raised the jar above his head and struck with all her strength. He went down, groaning, and then Axel jumped into the room. He grabbed her, but Beth threw his hands off herself and threw a punch, the way Daryl had taught her. Her fist connected with his jaw, and she felt pain shoot through her hand. She ran, grabbed another jar, and threw it at Axel. Then another, her eyes scanning him frantically, looking for the keys to the door upstairs. If she could just throw them at the girl in the corner…

Axel made another attempt at grabbing her, and this time he managed to get a hold of her. Beth let him press her back to his chest, breathing hard and fast, preparing herself. She was going to make a move. Just like Daryl had taught her. But then Axel grabbed her ponytail and yanked her head back. She blinked at the man standing in front of her—the guy she’d struck with a jar a few minutes ago—and then she felt the press of a cold syringe at her throat.

Everything went blank.

Now, as she regained consciousness, Beth realized there were ropes around her hands. She yanked at them, realizing she was tied to the hospital bed, the same one she had woken up in before.

Beth felt a silent sob build in her chest. She had wasted her only chance, didn’t she? She hadn’t even managed to get the keys for that girl…

She let herself feel the sting of it for a moment, the heavy weight settling in her stomach as she thought about her situation. She had been so ready to die in that fight. She wanted to end it, she realized now as she cried silent tears. She wanted to make them kill her fast. To not let them do to her all those horrible things they did to other girls.

Minutes passed, the only sound in the room her silent sobs. She wasn’t sure how long it took before she ran out of tears, before the throbbing in her head became too tiring to keep on crying. She sniffled, then slowly turned her head to the side to discover that the corner where the girl had sat was empty now.

Please, don’t be dead, she thought, then wondered if being alive wasn’t a worse fate.

When the doors at the top of the stairs flew open just a few minutes after she woke up, Beth’s heart almost jumped out of her chest.

Heavy steps. Beth yanked on the ropes.

The man who walked in was dressed in a police uniform, and Beth blinked, surprised. Then she remembered—that’s what he had been wearing before, too. She had barely paid any attention to how he looked when he walked in the first time. Gorman, said the name tag on his uniform.

He was holding a tray with a bowl of soup, a piece of bread, and a bottle of water. She only remembered that the last time she ate was yesterday morning when she saw the food, and her stomach rumbled loudly.

Their eyes met, and an awful smirk appeared on Gorman’s chubby face.

“Look who decided to wake up,” he drawled, taking a few steps in her direction. “Our little fighter.”

He didn’t seem angry, but the way his eyes roamed her body, making her shiver in disgust, made her think she would’ve preferred for him to be. When he moved closer to the bed, Beth tried shuffling away from him, but her restraints didn’t leave her much room to move.

“I can see it now, you know? Why they’re all so obsessed with you. I’ve been trying to figure that out since the first time I heard about you. Axel… he rarely gets so angry, but you? You had him fuming. Can you believe it?”

He deposited the tray on the nightstand and then moved back to watch her from the foot of the bed.

“Why are you doing this?” she asked instead of answering him. She wasn’t sure where she found the bravery to speak. She didn’t even really think about it. The words just tore themselves out of her throat—angry, desperate. “What kind of cop are you?”

He smiled, looking down at the bed, before reaching out and touching her feet. Beth jerked her legs back, relieved that they hadn’t tied them as well.

“I even went out to have a little chat with you that one time, remember?” he said instead of answering. Beth grimaced at the reminder of the Bronze. She didn’t remember, and he seemed to be very much aware of that fact, if the way he smiled was any indicator. “It was actually thrilling, trying to take you when I knew Dixon was following you around like a lost puppy. God, but that man is a menace.”

Is. He said is, not was. Beth latched onto that word, her heart thudding in her chest, relieved—but not for long.

“Well, we don’t have to worry about him anymore now, you and I.”

Beth stayed silent, watching Gorman carefully as he rounded the bed and came closer to her middle. She jerked back again, trying to move to the far side of the bed, her right arm straining from the tightening ropes.

“Tell you the truth, I’ve been looking forward to this more than to any of the other ones,” the man said, and Beth willed herself not to react. She clenched her teeth when he dropped onto the bed next to her. He was too far from her legs to have a good angle for a kick, she noted. She could still try, though, if it came to it. “I don’t get this invested normally, you see. I try to keep my distance. Between you and me,” Gorman leaned in, and Beth curled her hands into fists, ready to push her legs up into his face the second he tried reaching for her. He whispered: “Axel’s a bit fucked up in the head. Been that way for years now.”

“And you’re not?” Beth asked, her voice flat but her mouth completely dry, her nerves strung.

Gorman smiled. She wasn’t fast enough in the end. His hand shot up, and he grabbed her by the face, the movement so sudden she only managed to squeal. She watched his eyes darken, the glint fading as he squeezed her cheeks between his fingers with force and leaned in even closer to her.

“Now, now, this is not a way to treat someone who just bartered two months of life for you,” he hissed, and Beth gasped, even though she had already heard him argue about that. “Yeah, that’s right. Axel? He’d have you gone today if I let him. He’s not right in the head, like I told you. My little cousin lost his marbles when his daughter died. But see, I have this deal with him since I found out about his little hobby. He gets to do what he does, I ensure all the cases are dropped, and in exchange? I get you.” He reached out with his other hand and pushed the hair out of her face, then slid his hand down the side of her head to her shoulders. Beth flinched but otherwise kept herself still. “And who knows, if you’re nice to me, maybe I’ll even convince him to keep you alive for longer, hm?”

She gulped. She had to get out of this bed, get out of these restraints. Otherwise, she wouldn’t have any chance.

Good Lord, Beth, who are you trying to fool?

You’re going to die here.

But then, the thought occurred to her. Maybe, maybe if she played nice, like he said, maybe he’d take the ropes off?

“I can be nice,” she said on a whim, and Gorman froze. He watched her carefully for a moment, clearly satisfied:

“Can you?”

Beth nodded.

“Good, 'cause I did you a huge favor. Talking him into letting you live.”

“I know, thank you,” she answered quickly, before the words could get stuck in her throat.

Gorman smiled, taking the bowl of soup from the tray and bringing it in front of her.

“So, I presume you know that when someone does you a favor, it’s a courtesy to show some appreciation,” he said, taking some of the soup on the spoon and directing it into her mouth. Beth felt her whole body tense as she eyed it. Ugh, not only was he making this awfully disturbing with how he was speaking to her and looking at her, but also… she wasn’t sure if the soup was drugged. She really didn’t want to put herself at an even bigger disadvantage. But then again, did she have any other option but to eat it?

“Eat,” he ordered when she didn’t move, and Beth, very slowly, leaned in.

“See, am I not the best? Buying you months of life, bringing you food?”

He fed her another spoonful, and Beth nodded, holding back a sob. She could barely even tell what soup it was—it tasted like paper. This man was mad, there was no doubt about it. Him and Axel both. Different flavors of mad, but still.

“You’re the best,” she said between the spoons, her voice shaking.

“And how is the soup? You want to finish it?”

She nodded again, because even though the soup was disgusting, she was hungry and it didn’t seem like there was anything else.

“Alright then. Do you promise not to fight if I untie you?” Beth blinked. That was… soon? She thought she’d have to play him longer. Especially after she attacked him with that jar. But then he was leaning back, putting the bowl back on the tray and telling her, “I mean, let’s be honest here, it was a great excuse for you and that biker.”

Her heart gave a violent twist in her chest at the mention of Daryl.

“Teaching you to fight, huh? But we both know it wasn’t really about that. You’re not a fighter, sweetheart. You just wanted a ride on his bike, didn’t you?”

Beth found herself nodding. A gentle, fake smile appeared on her face, even though everything in her screamed.

“Yeah,” she said, willing herself not to cry. “That’s what I wanted.” He smiled, reaching out to touch her again. This time when he touched her cheek, it was gentle, and she barely held herself from recoiling. “And I’ll be good. I promise.”

“You better be.” A chill ran through her, but she stayed still as he untied her hands. Both of them. Then stepped back. Instead of throwing herself at him and trying to fight him again, Beth simply massaged her hands, letting him step even further away from the bed. She eyed the gun at his waist, the nightstick, and the taser pinned to his belt when he turned around from her for a second. She didn’t let him catch her looking, though, quickly averting her eyes and reaching for the soup and the bread as he glanced back at her.

Relax now, don’t do anything rash, she told herself. She couldn’t jeopardize this. She needed to play the part he wanted her to play. Today in the cinema, starring: A hopeless little girl with Beth Greene. Gorman watched her like a hawk as she took the first bite of the sandwich he made for her. It tasted like paper too.

“See, isn’t that much better than attacking your saviors?”

That made her stop. She looked up at him again, her eyes catching on the gun holder, and then on the stick and taser again. There was no way she could be fast enough to take and use his gun on him. But maybe, maybe if she distracted him, if he was close enough, maybe she could get a hold of the stick or the taser. Maybe she’d be able to fight him off then. Or he’ll just shoot her in the head. A shudder went through her. Then another when she thought: Good. I’d rather be dead than have him touch me.

“Saviors?”

“Yes, saviors, beautiful,” he murmured, resting his hands on his belt. “You’re rotten. And our dear Axel believes he can save your soul from damnation. That’s why you’re here.”

“Do you believe that too?” she asked, partly because she felt like this was what he wanted her to ask, and partly because she was trying to understand what his deal was. What kind of mad he was.

“Nah, but that’s why I’m your savior too. I’m the only chance you’ve got at coming out of this alive.”

Was that what you told all the other girls? Were you lying to them that, if they played nice with you, if they did what you said, you’d save them? Is this your sick fantasy? she wondered, just as he said,

“But see, I need to know that you deserve this. That you aren’t just as bad as he says, you know?”

 

*

 

“I need you to look into someone for me,” Daryl said the moment Rick picked up his phone. “Axel Peterson. He lived here a few years back. Worked at a school, maybe?”

“Peterson? Doesn’t sound familiar, but let me check.” There was a moment of silence on the other side of the line, and Daryl eyed Merle, sitting idly by his side. They had left the church in a hurry, not willing to wait and see if Father Matthias would make good on his promise and call the cops on them. He probably would; Daryl didn’t think he’d miss this perfect opportunity to get them into trouble, not even after realizing that they were both mistaken about each other.

“That preacher man could’ve been lyin’, you know,” Merle told him as they waited for Rick to come back with some information. They were sitting at Eric’s diner, at the far end of the town, and while Daryl was talking to Rick, Merle was browsing through the White Pages, trying to find Axel Peterson’s address on Aaron's laptop. “Shoulda let me press him some more, break another finger or somethin’.”

“He ain’t lyin’.”

“And how do you know? You were convinced he was our guy before; now you ain’t. The hell did he say to ya?”

Daryl opened his mouth to argue, to say that he just had a hunch, and he was right too: Father Matthias was connected to the murders, just not in the way he thought before. Daryl was pretty sure, if he was their guy, he wouldn’t have caved so easily under Merle’s persuasion, wouldn’t have gotten so hysterical. That, and Rick was right—there wasn’t much evidence against him to begin with. Daryl had just let his antipathy toward the man cloud his judgment, that was all. Not that he had any reason to believe this whole Axel Peterson thing, but Daryl had nothing else, not even one of his early suspects fit the timeline. No evidence. So Daryl was going to follow this one lead, even if it killed him in the end, because the alternative was much worse.

“We have someone under this name in our records,” Rick came back before Daryl could launch into what was on his mind. “He was a victim in one of the cases. Eight years ago. Home invasion gone wrong. His wife and twelve-year-old daughter… they were brutally assaulted and murdered. Right in front of him.”

“Damn…” Daryl muttered, shaking his head. “Was he ever a suspect?”

“No. He was found in the basement. Naked. Tied to a pipe. Beaten half to death. It wasn’t him.”

“Then who did it?”

“There were three of ’em. Cops caught ’em tryin’ to run when the sirens came. Didn’t get far. All three went to trial and got the death penalty.” Rick paused for a beat, his tone darkening. “They are still waitin’ to be executed.”

“And what about Peterson?” Daryl pressed. “What happened to him after all that?”

“Hospitalized for a while, but he didn’t stay local. Left the job he had…” Rick fell silent, and Daryl was ready to ask what kind of job, when Rick muttered thoughtfully, “He was a gardener. Hired by the local schools to take care of their green areas. We don’t have much else on him—no current address, no recent records. Disappeared off the radar.”

“Mhm, interestin’.”

“Why are you askin’ about him?”

“I think he might be our guy.”

“Based on what?” Rick asked, surprised, just as Merle made a noise. Then he looked up at Daryl with a smile. Found him, he mouthed.

“Daryl? Based on what?”

“I gotta go,” Daryl disconnected the call.

“It’s his old address,” Merle showed him the screen. “Figured we can start there.”

Daryl nodded and got up to follow Merle to the address he found. The house where Axel Peterson lost his daughter and wife. Why on Earth would he ever turn to doing something similar to what his own daughter experienced to other girls was beyond Daryl, and it worried him.

What if Father Matthias was wrong about Axel too? He was wrong about Daryl, after all, thinking that he was the man behind it all. Was it wise to follow a lead from someone who hated his guts?

Well, there wasn’t much else they could do. Garry and Santucchi were keeping an eye on Father Matthias, so if he was lying about any of it, they would know the moment he made any movements. The search organized by the Greenes was still taking place in the nearby woods too, but Daryl didn’t think he could survive the townsfolk’s wrath if he showed his face there anyway. Not to mention, actually standing eye to eye with Hershel and Annette Greene.

He failed to keep their daughter safe.

The house that apparently still belonged to Axel Peterson looked like a ruin that hadn’t been lived in for years. Daryl figured it probably wasn’t. Rick said the guy had dropped off the face of the Earth; nobody had ever mentioned him to Daryl during his investigation either, as if the guy simply ceased to exist and erased himself from the minds of the townsfolk at the same time. Usually, when a tragedy like that happened, it left a mark, became a tale of this one bad thing that happened in an otherwise safe neighborhood, like his mother burning herself down in their home was. But Daryl had never heard of Axel Peterson until now. And even if he had, he doubted he would ever have connected him to Sophia’s case.

He was so focused on the house in front of them that the sharp click of a gun cocking jolted him back to the moment. He glanced at Merle, who had his gun raised and nodded his chin at the crossbow on his back. Daryl nodded back silently and took the crossbow off his back. Why would Zach bring this instead of a gun for him, he wasn’t sure, but he wasn’t going to complain. He could deal with whoever took Beth with his crossbow just fine—Daryl would gladly put as many bolts in his body as possible for laying his hands on Beth.

“What if we don’t find him here?” Daryl whispered as they stood in front of the doors, torn between knocking and simply going in. Well, Daryl was torn; Merle pushed the handle down, trying the doors. They were locked. Daryl chanced a knock, but only silence answered them.

“If not here, then Roy and Ryan will find something in Macon, or Zach will find something on the net about Peterson.” Merle shrugged, and this time he knocked, louder and more forcefully than Daryl had. Silence again. “Either way, we’re bringing Red home, brother.”

They both rounded the house to check for other possible entries. There was nothing on Daryl’s side, and when he turned to Merle, his brother was already shaking his head at his wordless question. No open windows; the doors to the kitchen were locked too. Nothing to do, but go in.

Daryl moved back and kicked the door. The doors groaned and crackled before giving in under the pressure. 

They went in, and Daryl looked around, taking note of old, dusty furniture and white bedsheets spread across couches and recliners. Most of the doors were left open, except for the ones behind the stairs. Basement, Daryl guessed, watching Merle as he went ahead, checking the living room and bathroom for any company. There was no one. Merle signaled for him that he was going to check upstairs, and Daryl nodded toward the basement doors before reaching for the handle.

He opened them to the wooden staircase and stopped. There was a small, barely visible light coming from behind the corner of the basement. It wasn’t bright enough to be seen from behind the locked doors, but it was there.

Daryl slowly descended, raising his crossbow, ready to strike. The house didn’t look lived in, but the basement? The basement told a different story. Daryl stopped on the lowest step and looked around, taking in the mattress lying under one of the walls, the discarded sheets and a pillow, two huge bloody stains on the floor next to it. It was in this basement that Axel’s family had been murdered, he realized.

Why would anyone stay here?

Plates of half-eaten food discarded near the foot of the mattress looked pretty fresh—no insects crawling around them yet. Daryl stepped down and took a few steps into the basement, looking for any signs of movement. There were shelves on his left with products stacked in— a perfect hiding spot—and under one of the walls across from the shelves, around the corner from where the light was coming from, was a desk.

Daryl first went around the shelves, but the only thing he found was even more shelves full of cans and jars of food. Some books. Some cardboard boxes stacked against one of the walls. And even more dust. He went back to the desk. It was messy, full of briefcases, books, and papers.

He pulled one of the folders open and froze. The name and a photo of Marlene Mitchell stared at him from the page, which was then filled with all the personal data of the girl. From her birth to her death. It looked just like police records, except only the first page contained official info about the places she lived, her parents, her stay at the orphanage, tickets, and offenses she was charged with during her junkie years, and all that. The rest were undated written reports of the… meetings? Sightings?

Day 1
I saw her through the window of the church today. There was no mass at that hour, so she must have been there for one of the meetings. Poor little girl. So young. Couldn’t have been more than fourteen. Already destroyed by life. Already brought down. And it’s only going to get worse for her, isn’t it?
Like it did for you, my little Rose. This world is not for little girls like you. So sweet and innocent. So broken.
I feel for her, my little Rose.

Day 2
I went to the meetings. Sat through them and listened to her talk. It was even worse than watching her through the windows. She doesn’t talk like a little girl should talk, my little Rose. She speaks of awful, awful things that happened to her at the orphanage and after. She escaped one Hell. Switched it for another. And now she’s here. Telling others about it. Pouring this dirt out of herself, vomiting words like snakes. There’s dirt and blood and pain all over that girl. Her face all wrong. Not like a little girl should be at all.
She hurts, my little Rose.

Day 11
Aren’t we complicit in suffering if we allow it? Aren’t we responsible as adults for our little girls?
I decided, my little Rose. I need to help her. I need to take the pain out of her heart. Pull out the rotten parts. I’ll make the sweetness return to those cheeks.

Day 231
I first approached Marlene because I thought she didn’t deserve what happened to her. Didn’t deserve this struggle that life was putting her through. I thought I could help her. But now I’m not so sure anymore.
I don’t like the way she looks at me.

Day 432
He said not to. But I can’t leave her like that. Not when I know what happened to her. What he did to her. I asked him to leave her alone. But he didn’t. He didn’t, and now she needs to go. I don’t care what he says about it. I told her to be good, to stay clear, to stay with Father Cyrus, but she had to… she just had to make herself rotten. Even more rotten. And now I have to punish her.
Punish Marlene. Punish Beth Greene.
What’s with those girls, my little Rose? Don’t they understand? Why are they turning up like that? Why are they putting themselves in harm’s way willingly?

Daryl closed the file with a loud thud, feeling sick. Those weren’t the words of a sane person. Those were the words of someone truly disturbed, someone who babbled and babbled and didn’t make any sense, but didn’t care about making sense—only cared about taking the lives from those girls. Pretending he was doing them a favor.

He tossed the folder back to the desk and grabbed another one, his heart picking up its pace.

Susane Morgan, said the next file.

Sophia Peletier, said the third, and Daryl skimmed the pages again, his throat closing at some of the entries. There were 432 days described in Marlene Mitchell’s folder. Here, there were only 87, but Daryl felt his gut clench uncomfortably at the thought of this person spending so many days around Carol’s daughter.
Eighty-seven entries, and somehow, he picked the worst of them to read.

Day 52
She told me today, my little Rose.
I didn’t think she would. But she says I’m her friend. Friend, can you believe that? She likes my flowers too. Just like you did.
What an awful world this is, my little Rose. I knew it was only a matter of time. Like we both know, this world ain’t a place for little girls. But I thought we had more time.
I never liked Ed Peletier. You know? Always rubbed me wrong, I swear. This disgrace of a man. His own daughter.

Daryl gulped. He closed the file, the bile in his throat rising. He still reached for another file. There were many more in here than he thought, and as he opened them, one by one, names he didn’t even know—faces of young, missing girls—he could bet—stared at him. Daryl felt the bile move up his throat.

All those girls. Taken from their families. And for what? Because he thought he was freeing them from something? Saving them from pain? By hurting them the same way his own daughter was hurt? What was going on in this psycho’s mind?

Daryl pulled another file open and his breath caught in his throat.

Beth Greene.

For a second, he just stared at the name. Then his eyes flicked to her face. They were all pictures taken from the school records, and the Beth Greene that was staring at him now was much younger than she was when he met her. A few years younger, at least. Round face and red cheeks. It somehow made this thing even worse—this picture being so old, her being so young in it. Thirteen, maybe fourteen.

Daryl didn’t want to read it. He didn’t want to know.

But his fingers acted on their own, turning the page before he could really think about it.

Day 1
She smiled at me from across the street. But I don’t think she recognized me. She was always doing that—I remember. Smiling at people. Like they all deserved it. Like the world wasn’t a bad place at all. So naive. So innocent.
If there’s one girl who deserves to be saved, it’s her. And I can save her, little Rose.
All that pain. All that heartbreak. All those awful, disgusting people waiting to hurt her. That boyfriend of hers. Jimmy. Looking at her like she’s his for taking. And she doesn’t even notice, I don’t think.
He’ll destroy her. That little devil. I know, Rose. I know. But we need him. And it’s okay, it’s okay if he hurts them a little…
Because then I’ll save them.
I can bring her peace.
But first, I’ll free Sophia. Just like I promised you, my little Rose. And he won’t get her. Not even for a day.

Day 2
Leaving school. Wearing this short cheerleader outfit. Doesn’t she know? The world, the bad world, is out there. They are all watching you, Bethy. And you’re giving them yourself on a silver plate wearing this. Little girls shouldn’t dress like this. You know that, my little Rose, right?
But it’s okay.
Soon. Soon it will be all over. I’ll help you. I won’t leave you for the wolves to rip you apart.

Day 3
She was out drinking coffee with some friends today, and I couldn’t help myself. I took another picture of her for you. She’s still so sweet. Smiling at people. Pure. Maybe, if we acted soon, maybe we could save her from it all. Have her take that glint in her eyes with her back to you, what do you think, little Rose? Would you like that? A friend like her could do you some good.
I know. I know it’s for nothing, but we can’t take the deal away. It helps. It helps so much, little Rose, and that’s how the world is anyway. She would’ve ended up like this anyway. We’re only giving her peace. Like we did with Sophia.

Day 6
I haven’t seen her for some time. Little Beth Greene. She’s not little anymore, you know, my little Rose? How could she change so much in just a few months?
Grown up quite a bit. Soon she’ll be a young woman, and it will be too late to save her. Maybe it already is.
She was talking to Daryl Dixon yesterday. At night. Middle of the Street. Yes. Yesterday. I couldn’t speak to you before now. Couldn’t tell you. Because how could I? The way she looked. Rose, the way she looked at him. Why was she talking to him like she knew him? What is he doing to her behind closed doors? Oh, if you saw her, my little Rose. You’d know.
Not even Marlene has ever been this much

Trouble.

Do you think she knows what she’s doing? Do you think she’s that

Rotten.

I couldn’t sleep. Thinking about it. I can’t sleep thinking about you. Why would you talk to him like that? Don’t you know, don’t you know that’s how they get you? And then you’re gone. Rotten. Rotten, rotten, rotten, rotten, rotten, rotten, rotten, rottenrottenrottenrottenrotten

Daryl closed his eyes. Beth was with this man right now. Wherever she was. Goddammit. Could he have some other doors in here? Some kind of secret latch leading to where Beth was?

He opened his eyes to catch on Day 9 at the bottom of the second page:
I can’t follow her anymore. Dixon’s with her. All the time now. In the woods. Putting dirt on her. I have to try to come closer. Put dirt on him.

Daryl dropped the file. Then picked it up again as if not even by his own will, his heart thundering as he went to the last entrance. There weren’t many of them—just 14. He saw Beth fourteen times only - considering how many times he saw, followed or spoke to the other girls, that number seemed to be small. But still, fourteen days in total, of him watching Beth and thinking about hurting her; Daryl felt rage build inside him at the thought. Nine out of those were when Daryl was supposed to be watching her too. It hurt something fierce that he failed to notice that guy. Either he was that good or simply never followed her when Daryl was around. Well, except for those three times, or more, when he took photos of them together, when Daryl was too busy screwing around with her to pay attention.

Day 14
I could finally come close. No friends, no family. No Daryl Dixon. Only her. Still so naive. Even after all that Dixon did to her. She even believed I came with my niece. Just pointed to some random girl. Can you believe it, my little Rose?
She was so fake. Her smile all wrong. Her skin glistened from sweat. From the dirt. And he was calling her while I was talking to her. And then she was gone, before I could try to persuade her to come and help me with something. Before I could snatch her from under her dumb friends’ noses. So rotten, she didn’t even care that I’d seen his name. Jumped to take the phone. Can’t have that biker wait, can we? Gotta give it all to him.
Gotta get rid of him.
Are we ready to get rid of him, my little Rose?
Make him rot in Hell? Yes. Yes. Ready. Make it Hell.

When did you write it? Daryl wondered. And why didn’t Beth tell him she was talking to a stranger? Was it before or after she found the photos in his room?

Maybe, he thought, he wasn’t a stranger. Maybe that’s why she didn’t tell him. If she met someone she knew and didn’t find threatening, she might not have felt the need to share this with him. But then again, that girl talked nonstop. About everything. He even knew about the breakup that Amy girl was going through, the fight Beth had with that other girl, Lily, and some stupid crush Amy had on Lily that Lily didn’t know about. That last bit Beth told him by accident, then got really flustered and asked him not to tell anyone, as if he had anyone he’d want to share that information with. As if he’d ever share anything she disclosed to him with another living soul.

Why wouldn’t she tell him about that guy though? Did she forget? Was he this forgettable? This good at making himself unimportant?

A movement behind the basement’s window caught Daryl’s attention. He saw the shoes and jeans. The person was moving slowly, and soon he heard footsteps coming closer to the kitchen door. The same ones they came through.

Somebody was coming, and Daryl had no idea where Merle was. Shit.

The footsteps came to a halt at the door, alerted by the state of it. Daryl knew he had only seconds to act. He threw himself in the direction of the stairs just as the person upstairs started running.

Chapter 32: You will never see Daryl Dixon again

Summary:

Blood splattered, staining the ground,
Red bleeding into green.
Did someone's life just end, or was it just a dream?

Notes:

You know, I’m just so thankful to every single one of you—for leaving kudos, writing all those lovely comments, and sticking around for this long. Hearing that this fic deserves an award? You’re making my heart swell, and all I can do is mention it every single time in these notes, because like, whaaat? I still can’t believe this fic has gotten so much love and appreciation. ❤️

It’s amazing because this fic sat in my Dropbox for years, unfinished. I think it had somewhere around twenty chapters when I came back to it, and they were much shorter than what we ended up with. I decided to finish this story because it was mostly written. I thought, just a few more chapters and it’s done. But then I got back into it and ended up writing fifteen more chapters! I just kept writing more and more after every chapter was published here because I couldn’t get enough. I fell in love with this version of Daryl and Beth, and it’s incredible to see that I wasn’t the only one.

This story would never have taken the shape it did, or gotten to this point, if it weren’t for all of you. Your comments and love for this story changed my mindset from, “Just finish it quickly and publish it, so all that work years ago doesn’t go to waste,” to, “Just one more chapter. I’ll write one more because, OMG, I cannot finish it like that. No, it needs more. They need more. I NEED MORE—more interactions between Beth and Daryl, more banter, more moments!”

I was a bit unsure about the crime aspect, too—thinking you might not like it—and it’s been so satisfying to see you all get so invested in it, trying to guess who the murderer is and whether Beth is going to get taken or not. Someone said in the comments on one of the last chapters that it’s been a wild ride, and oh my God, you’re so right. It’s been such a wild ride, and I’m so glad for it. Working on this story has been a blast, and you know what’s the best part? We still have three (long as hell, I promise) chapters to go after that one <3

Sorry for the long note, but I just had to get all this appreciation for you out of me, or I’d simply burst.

[EDIT] SHIT, I got so excited I forgot—TRIGGER WARNING, GUYS: This chapter contains themes such as attempted rape, sexual and non-sexual violence, and death.

***

Beth held her breath at the sound of the doors opening again. Gorman had left her after his little display of power earlier so that she had time to think about his offer. As if she had any choice in the matter. She knew he did it only to wind her up, to make her sit on that bed for hours, nervous, scared, and dreading the inevitable. When he finally did come back, he walked down slowly, as if purposely dragging this whole thing out.

“So, are you ready to show some appreciation now, little girl?” Gorman asked as he came to a halt at the foot of the bed.

She was already dirty, having had no showers for God knows how long, but when he said those words, his eyes moving slowly down her body, Beth felt dirtier than she had ever felt before. She held back a shiver of disgust, her insides twisting uncomfortably when Gorman smirked at her.

Beth only nodded. She wouldn’t have been able to speak in that moment; she could barely even breathe as she watched him take the gun out, lay it on the shelf, and then remove the whole belt. He reached into his pocket and took out the keys. He hadn’t locked the doors with a key when he came in, Beth realized suddenly—she hadn’t heard him do it. That meant they were open. But these here? These could be the keys to other doors. To freedom.

He left all of it on the shelf.

The space between the bed and the shelf in that one room had never seemed greater to her than it did on this day.

Her eyes snapped to him as he started moving in her direction.

No. Please, no.

She wasn’t ready; she had no plan. She had sat there for hours trying to think of something—anything—that could help her walk out of this alive, but the only thing she had managed was putting two of those jars under her pillow. If something went wrong, she could try striking him again. But that was it. She had nothing else. And he was a cop. Years of training. Beth had no idea if the element of surprise would work this time, if he’d let his guard down enough for her to even try fighting him off.

There was a very real possibility that she had already used her only chance at getting out of this alive.

Beth found herself shaking again. She knew what Gorman was going to do. Knew the position she was going to find herself in, in just a few moments. It was the one she found herself in often during training sessions with Daryl—with Daryl pressing down on her, keeping her hands above her head or pinned to the side.

This time, however, throwing the attacker off wouldn’t be enough. She had to either get to his stuff and then… then what? Fight him off? This hulk of a man?

And yeah, Daryl was all strong and muscular, and she fought him off, but then… Daryl never wanted to hurt her. Never really tried. It was all pretend. Beth was pretty sure he held back on her, using only some of his strength. It was always so coordinated with him: Put your hand here, now press there, gotta turn your wrist this way. And by God, was he gentle too. Daryl didn’t look it—darn, Beth didn’t think he knew it—but he was. Even when he was trying to appear menacing, when he was playing the role of the attacker, his touch had never even breached the line of discomfort, let alone pain. It was firm, sure, but measured, like he was hyper-aware of his own strength and terrified of crossing a boundary.

So how was she supposed to do this now? How on earth…

You gotta relax, Beth, Daryl’s voice rang in her head suddenly. Gotta focus.

The bed dipped when Gorman got on it, and Beth squeezed her eyes shut for a second, trying not to recoil. The Daryl in her head was right. She needed to focus.

She willed herself to ignore the hands on her, the labored breathing above her. Beth breathed in and out. For a second—just a second—she was back at the clearing, with Daryl pushing his body weight into her, his rough voice guiding her through all the possibilities, all the moves that could help her get out of this kind of situation.

"Your hands are free?”

Yeah.

“Good. Then you wanna be quick.”

Sure, but he’s bigger than me, stronger than me, trained…

“Ain’t about strength. I told ya, they might be bigger than ya, but if they don’t see ya comin’ at 'em, they ain’t prepared for it. All you have to do is punch them the right way.”

Okay. Where?

“Your best bet is here.” Daryl took hold of her hands and guided them up to behind his ears. Beth’s breath hitched, and his eyes dropped briefly to her lips. He swallowed audibly, his eyes snapping back up to hers as he turned her hands in his to position them the right way. “Like that. Do it fast. Hard. And you can even knock them unconscious.”

I’m not sure I can, she thought, remembering that afternoon, speaking to this past version of Daryl as if he could really hear her—as if he wasn’t partly a memory, partly her imagination only. God, I don’t remember the exact spot! Your eyes were shining in the sun, and your skin was so warm, and you smelled so good… What if I miss? What if I miss the spot, Daryl?!

A sob ripped itself out of her throat, and Gorman chuckled above her.

“Relax, Beth. Breathe.”

Gorman pushed his face into her hair, breathing her in as if taunting the fictional Daryl in her head. She scrunched her face in disgust, and Daryl’s voice turned a little meaner, darker in her head as he growled:

"Break his neck. Hit him under his jaw when he don’t expect it and break his damned neck.”

Beth opened her eyes. Gorman slid one of his hands up her hip, cradling her cheek with the other as he leaned away slightly, his face above her now, close enough that she could still feel his breath on her skin.

“You weren’t lying, huh? You really can be nice,” he murmured, smiling down at her, and Beth managed a faint, broken smile while her right hand clenched into a fist. She reached out to his face with her left hand, and Gorman flinched lightly but relaxed when all she did was cradle his cheek in return.

“Yeah,” she breathed out, another sob trapped somewhere in her throat. “Daryl Dixon taught me.”

Her fist flew up with all her strength. The punch landed under his jaw.

A crack. His head snapped back.

Beth’s knee slammed into his crotch. An elbow to his chest sent him sprawling off the bed. She launched toward the shelf, heart pounding, the whole structure shaking as she collided with it.

“You. Filthy. Little. Bitch,” he croaked behind her, his throat tight after she made his neck snap in an unnatural, uncomfortable way.

She grabbed the gun and turned around just in time to see him stagger in her direction, his face red and scrunched in pain, saliva dripping from his mouth as he massaged his neck. He threw himself at her, and Beth barely managed to cock the gun before he was just there, in front of her, his other hand shooting up to take the weapon. He grabbed it, pushed it down, and…

Beth pulled the trigger.

The gunshot roared —loud, louder than she’d ever heard—and Gorman stepped back with a wounded noise, then fell down on his ass. She wasn’t sure if she’d missed or not. She didn’t stop to see.

Beth grabbed the keys from the shelf and hurled herself to the stairs. She could hear him groaning and moving behind her as she ran up the stairs. She didn’t look back until she pushed at the door, and it gave way under her hands.

Gorman was downstairs, his bloodied hands gripping the railing as he hauled himself after her. Beth pushed the door closed.

A hatch. She pushed it down, effectively trapping Gorman in the basement, then stepped back quickly, her whole body shaking as she frantically looked around.

She was in a house. All the lights were on, but Axel was nowhere in sight.

She jumped when the door to the basement shook suddenly, an animalistic scream ripping itself out of Gorman’s throat as he pressed against it. If he got to her now, he’d kill her.

Beth jumped even further away from the door as the man bounced off it again, making the frame shake. It wasn’t going to hold him for long.

She ignored his threats and rushed through the corridor, only stopping when her eyes caught the kitchen table. Car keys and a phone—just what she needed. Beth pushed the gun under her belt, grabbed both the phone and the keys, and ran to the door barefoot.

The key scraped against the metal as she tried to push it in. Clink. Stuck. It didn’t work.

She snatched the second key, her breath quick and shallow. Clink. Click. Rattle. No luck.

The keys slipped from her sweaty grip, falling to the floor with a hollow clang. She cursed under her breath, crouching to retrieve them.

“Please, please,” she whispered to herself, her voice cracking as she jammed another one into the lock. Clink. Ch-chnk. Click.

The bolt turned.

Beth whimpered as she threw the door open, fresh air hitting her lungs. For a fleeting moment, hope surged through her chest—but then she froze. 

A sob. A faint, broken sound.

Beth turned. One more room on this floor, she noted. The doors closed. The sobs were coming from there.

She could go. She could run. She’d be free.

But her feet didn’t move. She eyed the basement door, still shaking under Gorman’s relentless assault. If that girl was still here, Beth couldn’t just leave her with those monsters.

Her heart pounded as she stepped toward the room. She hesitated outside the door, her hand hovering over the knob. For all she knew, Axel could be inside, waiting to ambush her. She could leave and look for help, but the thought of abandoning the girl made her stomach twist.

Beth pulled the gun from behind her belt and reached for the knob. Slowly, she pushed the door open.

The room was dark.

There, curled on the bed, was the same girl who had been in the basement. Shivering, sobbing. The air was thick with the metallic scent of blood, but Beth didn’t have time to think about it.

No one else was here.

Beth slid the gun back behind her belt and moved inside.

“Hey, come on,” she said, trying to sound soft but missing by a mile, her voice rushed and rough. “We need to go. Hey,” she embraced the girl and slowly helped her up. “I’m gonna get you to safety, yeah? Come on.”

She was rushing, pushing the girl to her feet as she spoke, forcing her to move even though the girl was clearly out of it. She could barely stand on her legs, so Beth hauled her along using all her strength. It all seemed to be taking so much time.

Too slow, Beth thought. Please, move faster.

As they hurried down the corridor, the girl sobbed harder and harder every time Gorman slammed against the door.

God, she’s slowing us down so much. We won't make it.

When they reached the front door, she shoved the girl outside into the cool night air. Beth nearly sobbed herself, but there was no time.

The night was dark, the only light spilling from the house behind her. She frantically looked around, her chest heaving with each desperate breath. No one was in sight.

For a fleeting second, relief threatened to overwhelm her, but it was snuffed out by the sharp sting of reality. She had no idea where they were.

Fields stretched endlessly to the left, a vast sea of green swaying in the breeze, while dense woods loomed to the right, dark and foreboding. Her stomach clenched. They were far from the city, far from help.

Then came the sharp, splintering crack of the door behind them. Beth whirled around, the sound sending a jolt of terror through her. The basement doors were still standing, but straining against the onslaught. They weren't going to hold him back for long now.

A black car was parked in front of the house, and Beth pulled the girl in its direction. The door inside the house cracked again, the unmistakable sound of it breaking under Gorman’s strength ringing in her ears.

Heavy footsteps.

Beth threw open the car door on the passenger side, pressed the keys into the girl's hands, and pushed her inside.

“Hide.”

She slammed the door shut and stepped back quickly.

It wasn’t the best plan. Beth had no idea if the girl could drive herself back to safety, but there was no way they could’ve made it to the woods together in time, no way Beth could round the car, start it and drive them to safety either. Not with Gorman stepping out the house a few seconds later.

But Beth could buy her some time.

Gorman burst out of the house with another gun in his hand. His frantic eyes swept across the area just as Beth sprinted toward the woods.

She glanced back, but he wasn’t stopping to shoot her. No, Gorman was chasing her, gun in hand, paying no mind to the car. He was limping, though. The bullet Beth fired must have hit its target. It gave her a much-needed advantage. She pushed herself behind the treeline and ran. Twigs snapped under her socks, rocks tore at her feet, and branches scratched her face. She didn’t stop, not even when a sharp stick jabbed the bottom of her right foot, nor when she tasted blood in her mouth after a branch hit her.

Beth could swear she still heard his labored breathing behind her, his shouts, his threats. She knew: if she stopped, he’d rape her and then kill her. If she was lucky. If she wasn’t, he’d keep her around for rounds two and three. Maybe for the whole two months.

Fear drove her forward, even as her breath came in short, painful gasps. Even after she tripped over some roots and scraped her hands and knees. Her hip pulsed with pain, but she hauled herself up in seconds, not daring to look back. She kept running, even as tears blurred her vision and the overwhelming ringing in her ears made it hard to tell if he was still close or not.

Beth had no idea how much time had passed before she finally chanced a glance behind her. Was it fifteen minutes? Twenty? Thirty-five? It might have even been closer to an hour.

She couldn’t see him anymore. The woods were denser in this area, everything darker. She hoped that if he went back to the house, the girl had managed to drive away by now.

Beth jumped around two large rocks. She shot one more glance behind her to make sure he wasn’t following, then slid down, exhausted. Sweat dripped down her forehead and under her T-shirt. She heaved a deep breath, her ears ringing and her throat tight with a sob trapped on its way out.

She had no idea where they were, no clue where to run to find someone—anyone—who could help. Gorman might have been shot, might have been bleeding, but he still knew the area better than she did. And then there was Axel. Axel, who could come back at any moment and start looking for her too.

Beth didn’t know what to do, and she was pretty sure she had used all her strength on that one run. She’d gotten better at it, thanks to her training with Daryl, but she was hardly a sprinter.

Beth’s hands dropped to her sides, and that’s when she remembered that she had taken Gorman’s phone. She reached for it now with shaky hands, and a relieved sound escaped her when she saw that it still had reception. Beth placed a call, her eyes closing against warm tears as she waited.

Just as the kind, calm lady on the other side of the line told her to stay on the line while they were locating her, Beth heard the shuffle of feet somewhere behind her. He was too close; he was going to find her. She could feel it in her bones.

Beth pressed her lips tightly together, trying not to make a sound as she reached for the gun pressing into her back. The steps grew louder, and Beth let herself squeeze her eyes shut for a moment, sending a silent prayer.

Please, don’t let me die. Please, God, let me see my family again, let me see Daryl again, please...

Beth cocked the gun and stood up, pulling it on the man standing no more than two steps away from her.

The air left her lungs, and this time she wasn’t able to hold back a sob when it ripped itself from her throat. Beth’s heart hammered in her chest, her breath a shaky mess. Her mind couldn't catch up with what her eyes were seeing. It had to be a hallucination, surely. It couldn't be. Too good to be true.

Daryl’s face broke into a desperate, painful expression when his eyes landed on her face, their eyes meeting for the first time in days.

“Daryl?” A broken whisper escaped her lips as the gun slipped from her fingers with a hollow thud. The sound was swallowed by the frantic beat of her heart. Her feet barely found purchase on the rocks beneath her as she stumbled forward, sliding dangerously for a second.

But then his arms were there, pulling her up and into his embrace. Her body collided with his, shaking uncontrollably, and she buried her face in the crook of his neck, inhaling the familiar scent of him—the scent that made her feel like she was home. Daryl held her so tight she could barely breathe, but it didn't matter. Nothing mattered but the fast thrum of his pulse under her ear, the choked-up noise that escaped him the moment he wrapped his hands around her, and the press of his lips on the top of her head as Daryl rasped, his voice tight with the weight of relief.

“It’s okay,” She wanted to believe him. She needed to. But everything that had just happened—the fear, the fight, the raw terror—flooded her chest and throat. The sobs came unbidden, each one making it harder to breathe, but she couldn’t stop. Not with him holding her like that, as if he was scared to let go. Not with him repeating in a broken whisper: “I got ya now. You’re okay. It's okay.”

His grip tightened even more, his trembling hands clutching her like she was the only thing keeping him tethered. “I’m here. Ain’t nobody hurtin’ ya again.” His voice cracked slightly on the last word, and it made Beth’s heart ache. God, did she need to hear it. But Daryl wasn’t just saying it for her; he was saying it for himself, too. His voice was thick with tears, his hands moving frantically up and down her back, his fingers tangling in her hair, pushing her face into the crook of his neck with desperation. His lips pressed against the top of her head, leaving kisses wherever he could reach.

“We tracked that bastard,” Daryl continued after a long, painful pause. “Me an’ Merle. Followed him right here.” He seemed to be pulling her closer and closer with every single minute that passed, his fingers digging into her back, the trembling in his hands not stopping. "He ain't hurtin' you again."

Beth clung to him, but her thoughts were still racing. The girl. What about the girl?

“The girl, Daryl… is she—”

“She’s fine. We... we took care of him.” His voice cracked, almost breaking as he spoke, his grip tightening on her as if to anchor himself. “You’re safe now. You’re safe, Beth.”

There was a sharp hitch in his breath at the end of the sentence, the kind that betrayed how scared losing her made him feel. Beth heard it, and it made her heart ache. All she could do was cry with him, her tears mingling with his in that quiet, shattered moment. They stayed like this for longer than they should. Just holding each other like they couldn't bear to let go. 

Then Beth pulled back, only slightly, her gaze searching his as she looked up. She saw the raw emotion there, the fear, the relief, the guilt.

“And Gorman?” she managed through her sobs, because she needed to know. Because Axel might be taken care of, that's who Daryl must have followed, but Gorman was here the whole time...

“Gorman?” Daryl repeated, scrunching his face as if it didn't make any sense to him for her to be saying this name. His hands cupped her face in the same loving, tender manner he had been holding her a moment before, and Beth had to hold back another sob. 

“The cop, he…”

“Get your hands off my girl, Dixon.”

No.

The shout came from behind them, a cold, familiar voice—Gorman.

Daryl spun away from her, reaching for the crossbow he’d dropped when he saw her.

But Gorman wasn’t having it. “Don’t even try,” he warned, waving the gun at him. Daryl froze, mid-motion, his eyes narrowing, calculating.

Gorman limped toward them, a few feet away but still dangerous. He was putting all his weight on his right leg, but the wound in his foot couldn’t be that bad, seeing that he was still walking. 

“I told ya, step away from my girl, Dixon.”

Beth could feel the chill of fear creeping back into her bones. Beth glanced at Daryl. She knew the expression on his face. She had seen it the last time he came to her rescue.

“Ain’t your girl,” Daryl drawled through clenched teeth.

“She’ll be once I get rid of you,” Gorman spat, his face twisting with sick satisfaction as he sent Beth a nasty look. “Gotta teach her some manners before I snap her neck too, since you failed to do that.”

Daryl’s jaw tensed, his hands clenched at his sides, trembling as if he were struggling to keep the fury inside. He stepped forward, closing the space between them, his massive frame blocking Beth, a wall of muscle and rage. “You touch her,” he snarled, low and deadly, “you even look at her like that again, I’ll bury you six feet under. You got that?”

He took a step forward, his eyes never leaving Gorman’s.

“Are you tryin’ to threaten me, Dixon?” Gorman’s voice oozed with contempt, and he tightened his grip on the gun, his finger twitching. “Because from where I’m standin’, you’re the one in trouble here.”

Daryl’s eyes darted to the crossbow, a subtle shift of his head—barely noticeable, but Beth saw it. She turned her attention to the gun she’d dropped earlier. Her heart hammered in her chest. What if Gorman shot Daryl the second she moved? Panic threatened to seize her.

She glanced back at Daryl. While Gorman kept talking, Daryl kept inching forward, barely noticeable, like a predator closing in on its prey. He was moving farther from the crossbow though. What was he planning? Was he going to attack him with bare hands?

“I met you in my town,” Gorman’s voice was low, almost mocking, as he stepped forward, “and my gut told me to follow you.”

Beth’s thoughts screeched to a halt when she heard the sharp click of the gun being cocked. Her entire body went rigid. The sound sliced through the air like a death sentence.

Gorman’s grin widened, his eyes gleaming with malice.

“Lucky for me, I saw you and your brother drivin’ up. Followed you here, found your little shack... those poor girls. Too bad for them, huh? They didn’t make it. Guess you used ‘em up, then killed ‘em. I had no choice but to shoot you.”

Beth could feel her heart pounding in her chest, her mind reeling as Gorman’s words echoed in her ears. Daryl was so close to him now, but still not close enough to throw himself at the man and push the gun out of his hands. Not close enough to make good on his promise.

Then, a twitch of Gorman’s finger. Daryl’s eyes flickered, but before he could react, Beth already knew what was coming.

She didn’t think. She couldn’t think. She screamed, desperate, her body moving on instinct. She lunged at Daryl, throwing herself into him.

The shot rang out—a deafening crack that shattered the air. Louder than anything she had ever heard, louder than the echo of her own shots, louder than the roar of her heart. The world seemed to halt.

Time stopped. Darkness fell.

 

Blood splattered, staining the ground.

Red bleeding into green.

Blonde hair splayed across the grass like a broken halo.

No, Daryl thought. No.

But that was the last thing he saw.

 

Beth blinked her eyes open, the world coming into focus slowly. She was lying on the ground, the grass brushing her cheek, and her hands were clenched around something—Daryl’s vest at his back. Her heart pounded in her chest, so loudly it drowned out the ringing in her ears. Every inch of her body ached from the fall, but it was the silence that held her frozen for a moment. 

She kicked and screamed, hauling herself up, closer to Daryl and away from the attacker.

“Daryl?” she cracked, but no response came. He wasn’t moving. Why wasn’t he moving? “Daryl?!”

He lay on his side, facing away from her. Blood—so much blood—trickled down his head. Her stomach churned, and a cold, suffocating fear swept over her. No, no, no. She pushed herself up, hands trembling, her body screaming in protest as she crawled toward him.

She had to check. She had to know he was alright.

He had to be alright.

But before she could reach him, Gorman’s grip was back—yanking her away from him with brutal force.

“No! Let go! Daryl?!” She kicked and thrashed, but her limbs were weak, the panic blurring her thoughts. She could barely breathe, her body shaking uncontrollably. Gorman’s hands seemed like the only real thing in the chaos, but her mind was consumed by one desperate thought—Daryl.

“Please, Daryl, please!”

Please, move.

Don’t be—don’t be…

Another shot rang out, a sudden crack that tore through the chaos, but Beth didn’t turn to see. She didn’t even flinch when Gorman’s hands fell away from her, releasing their hold. Her eyes didn’t lift, didn’t even register what was happening around her.

She crawled forward, tears blurring her vision, each movement sluggish, as if the world was moving in slow motion. Her fingers reached for his face, trembling as they grazed the blood staining his skin.

So much blood.

“Daryl?” Her voice cracked, a sound so small, so fragile, it didn’t seem like it could come from her.

The world seemed to pause—just a beat, a heartbeat, maybe two. Then, a gentle tug on her arms. Rick's soothing voice. The words didn't register, but his hold on her did. He was pulling her away again.

“No, please, no!” She fought back, pushing herself free with a wild, frantic strength she didn’t know she possessed. She fell to her knees, hands shaking as they stretched toward Daryl again. 

People gathered around Daryl, and the woods echoed with voices. Paramedics were urging her to get out of the way, but all Beth could hear was the frantic pounding of her own heart.

She needed to feel his chest, his heart. Is he breathing? Breathe, please.

She needed to know he was alive. She had to.

It wasn’t until Merle’s rough voice, gruff and familiar, so like Daryl's, cut through the haze of her panic that she finally began to register the world around her.

“They’re sayin’ he’s alive, Red.” Merle’s hand gripped her tightly, replacing Rick by her side, pulling her against him as she fought to get to Daryl. His voice was steady, reassuring, but his hold firm and much more forceful than Rick's. “You gotta let ‘em do their work. He’s gonna pull through. He’s got this thick Dixon head for a reason, you know.”

Some part of her knew she had to let the medics do their work,  that she couldn't do anything herself, but her eyes were still stubbornly fixed on Daryl. Unable to move, unable to believe, until she could see him breathe.

And then it hit her. He was alive. The relief washed over her like a wave, but it wasn’t enough to stop the tears from streaming down her face. Daryl was alive.

Everything that happened after that, Beth remembered as if through a fog. The medics put Daryl on a stretcher, and she walked the whole way back to the house she escaped from that day, next to him, holding his hand in hers. She was barely aware of the sun coming up, lighting their path as they trudged back through the forest. The medics checked her too before letting her walk, draping a warm blanket over her shoulders and telling her she would have to go with them to the hospital for additional tests. As if there was any universe in which she wouldn’t stay with Daryl. As if anyone would be able to pry her fingers away from him now.

The black car parked in front of the house was now accompanied by five police cars and one ambulance. The girl Beth had left in the car was already sitting inside the ambulance, and upon seeing Beth, she started sobbing. 

“Can he go with us?” Beth asked the paramedics before getting in the car, the hand not holding Daryl reaching back for Merle. The medic shook his head at her, though.

“No, we barely have enough room for the three of you. He has to come to the hospital by himself.”

Beth turned back to Merle, an apologetic look on her face, but he smiled at her.

“Sorry, Red, couldn’t make it anyhow. Already got myself a ride in the pig wagon.” Beth scrunched her eyebrows at him, not understanding what he meant. But sure enough, the moment he said that, three cops started making their way toward them, handcuffs comin’ into sight. Merle raised his hands without a fuss, let ‘em cuff him like it was nothin’. “Don’t you worry, ain’t my first rodeo.”

And with that, he was gone, hauled off to one of the police cars. Beth shook her head, too overwhelmed with everything to really feel anything but worry about Daryl at the moment. As she finally got into the car, following Daryl, Beth saw Rick and Shane hauling Axel outside. His clothes were the only recognizable thing about him after what she assumed must have been a very intense first meeting with Merle’s wrath. Rick and Shane had to carry him by his arms, his legs buckling under him, one of his feet positioned at an entirely wrong angle. But he was alive, still trying to wiggle himself out of their grip.

She spent the ride to the hospital clutching Daryl’s hand in hers, as paramedics put him under the oxygen mask. Beth held his hand as they wheeled him into the hospital and down the corridor, doctors swarming him now, checking his vitals, and throwing around numbers and words that Beth didn’t quite register, her eyes on Daryl’s unmoving face.

They didn’t let her go into the operating room. One of the doctors pried her hand from Daryl’s after all, telling her she had to wait outside. Then she was alone.

Standing in the hospital corridor, watching the doors he disappeared behind. They said he was alive, she told herself, but it didn’t ease the bundle of nerves in her stomach.

Then someone grabbed her again, and Beth flinched before realizing it was just a paramedic, trying to make her move again, go back to the emergency room where she would be checked by the doctors—where her family was already waiting for her.

Beth broke down into sobs again when she saw them. She went from arms to arms, and they all cried with her, all happy and emotional about seeing her healthy and whole. Even Maggie and Glenn were there, back from their Europe trip earlier than they were supposed to.

Once the adrenaline wore down, she found herself swaying on her legs, and she went through the motions, letting the doctors pull her from room to room to check her from head to toe for any injuries she might have sustained. It wasn’t until hours later, after many tests, a shower, and dinner at the hospital, when she was tucked safely in the hospital bed, surrounded by her family, that Rick and Shane came in to take her testimony.

“Do you know how Daryl is?” Beth asked before any of them could start questioning her. The nurses and doctors had been rushing around her, not answering her questions for the last few hours. Nobody wanted to tell her anything, and she couldn’t take not knowing anymore. If anyone knew, she figured, it would be Rick.

“Bethy, that’s not what Rick and Shane came here for. You can’t just…” her mother started calmly, but Rick interrupted her.

“It’s okay, Annette.” He smiled at Beth warmly. “Daryl’s fine. The bullet only grazed his head. Knocked him unconscious. He told me he would be a dead man if it wasn’t for you.”

Beth’s heartbeat picked up its pace.

“He’s awake?”

“Yeah, he woke up a few minutes ago. Scared a few nurses when he tried ripping the IVs out to rush here and check on you.” Beth couldn’t help a small smile that pushed itself onto her face. Rick answered her with one of his own, but then glanced at her parents apologetically before adding, “I had to promise him I’d talk to your folks and ask if he can see you.”

“Out of the question,” her mother said right away, and Beth scrunched her eyebrows. She felt like she missed something big. She knew her mother didn’t like Daryl much, but he did save her life, didn’t he?

“Mom?” She looked at her parents questioningly. They hadn’t told her much about what happened after she disappeared, only that they were scared and did everything in their power to look for her. They were thanking the Heavens she was alright, but they were still in shock, just like her. Now, after a few hours of downtime, they all regained their footing. At least as much as was possible considering all that happened.

It was her father who answered her when her mother started avoiding her eyes, almost as if she felt guilty or ashamed of something.

“We know, Bethy.” Beth swiped through all of their faces. Shawn had his hands in his pockets and was looking down at his feet, and Maggie was watching her with a glum expression on her face. Standing next to her, Glenn was offering her a small reassuring smile. Her parents, though, were both wearing the kind of expressions she’d never seen directed at her. Her mother was scrunching her face in a mix of remorse, heartache, and revulsion. Her father had a similar look on his face, only he seemed to be trying to assess her reaction at the same time, searching her for some answers as he finished, “When you went missing, your friends spoke up about… Daryl. Jimmy came forward too.”

“Poor boy blamed himself for what happened,” Mom added.

Beth couldn’t help a snort that escaped her at those words. Jimmy showing any kind of remorse—that must have been something. Her father’s eyes sharpened on her face, and she realized maybe that wasn’t the best reaction to have to what was being revealed to her. Because they had to mean her relationship with Daryl.

“Then your brother here admitted to keeping your secret,” her father continued, and Beth glanced at Shawn, who was still avoiding looking at her. “And the investigation only confirmed it all.”

“So, you know?” She asked now, a blush creeping up her face as she watched her parents' faces.

“We do, and we’re sorry we were so blind to it,” her mother spoke now, her voice breaking a little. “But we’re not going to let you down like that again, Bethy. This monster will never see you again.”

What?

“Monster? Daryl’s not a monster, Mom,” Beth shook her head. "He's not like Gorman. And it's not... not like that.”

Her mother pressed her lips into a thin line while exchanging looks with her father.

“Whatever he told you to make you feel like you had to do this…” her mother started carefully, and Beth shook her head, not quite believing what she was hearing. Like what? Like he made her do all of this? Like he pressured her into being with him? “You don’t have to protect him anymore, honey. He wasn’t the one behind the murders, but we can still make sure he answers for manipulating you into… touching him.” Her mother scrunched her face, saying it like she ate something stale.

“No, Mom,” Beth pushed through the embarrassment. She had to make it right. Make them understand nothing of the sort happened. “Daryl didn’t manipulate me. I wanted to be with him. Our relationship…”

“Relationship?” Her mother made another disgusted face at that. “You were in a relationship with Jimmy, honey. That was normal. That was good. This? This is abuse. Clear as day.”

“No!” Beth couldn’t help but raise her voice. Her mother flinched, not used to Beth screaming. She got up from the bed, suddenly too agitated to be sitting down for this conversation. “He didn’t abuse me! Daryl would never do that, Mom. He’s not like that. He’s gentle and sweet and…”

Annette snorted.

“What he is? Is a perverted, repulsive man who took advantage of your good heart. Nothing more!”

Rick cleared his throat.

“We should let you have this conversation in private. We can come…”

“No,” Beth interrupted him hastily. “Tell them! He’s your friend!”

Rick sighed. There was an apologetic look on his face when he spoke next:

“He is, yes. And I can say after all the years of knowing him, Daryl is a good man.” Mom snorted again, hearing this, and Rick cleared his throat before adding, “But now, that doesn’t mean I have any say in what your family feels about his actions…”

Beth scrunched her nose.

“You’re sayin’ that as if he did something bad! But he didn’t. He… Mom, Dad, it’s not like you think…” Beth took a gulp of air, her eyes turning to her dad now, pleading. If her mom didn’t get it, maybe her dad would. He always prided himself on seeing right through them, on understanding them better than anyone else. Well, go on, Dad, take a good look at me and see. See it for what it is, I beg you. She took a hold of Hershel’s hands, squeezing them in hers, her eyes finding her father's as she rasped, “I’m in love with him, Dad.” Hershel shook his head, his eyes full of regret as he eyed her. “Please, understand. I love him! And I think, I think he loves me too, you know?”

The tears pulled in her eyes unbidden. Daryl never said that to her, but she was sure that’s what he meant on the Ferris Wheel, and even without the admission, Beth could feel the love in the way he looked at her, moved around her, touched her. As if she was the most precious thing to him.

Her father shook his head again, clearly not understanding, even though she could see his eyes going a little more glassy as well.

“Daryl didn’t do anything bad to me, Dad,” she tried again. “He saved me, he taught me to fight, okay? I wouldn't be alive if it wasn’t for him. And he’d never hurt me or make me do any...”

Her father scrunched his face in a painful grimace, pulling his hands out of her grip, snapping suddenly:

“I saw the photos, Bethy.” It sounded as if the words were ripped out of his throat. “I know what he made you do.”

It caught her off guard, but one glance at Shawn reminded her of the strip of photos from the Fair. Only much later did Beth learn that the photos Hershel had in mind on that day were of an entirely different nature than the ones she thought about. If she had known back then, she would’ve never uttered what she did next:

“And what’s wrong about that? We were just having fun, we…”

“Enough.” Hershel’s voice resonated through the room, rendering her silent. This was the tone you didn’t argue with. The tone that meant all the discussions were finished. “You’re just confused, Bethy. You were manipulated, forced to lie…”

“I’m not confused, Dad,” she interrupted him, arguing still, against all reason. “And if you want to blame someone for all my lying, you’ll have to blame me! Not Daryl. I did that. I wanted that.”

Hershel looked at her again, barely contained anger and disappointment marrying his face.

"If that's true, then I'm very disappointed in you," he said, his voice steady but tinged with sorrow. "But it doesn't matter what you say right now, Bethy. You will never see Daryl Dixon again. Your mother and I will make sure of that."

*

 

Daryl’s eyes snapped to Rick’s as he entered the room. He knew what the answer was even before Rick shook his head.

“I’m sorry,” he said, and surprisingly enough, it looked genuine. “For what it’s worth, I’ve never seen Beth fight like that for anything. She even made a dash for it, looking for your room when you were having your MRI.”

Daryl had to hold back a smile, thinking about her strength and resilience. About how she didn’t think she was strong at all. Just another dead girl, she told him once.

Not even close, Daryl thought now.

“She still here?” Daryl asked, his voice just a silent murmur, weak, just like the rest of his body at the moment.

Rick shook his head again.

“They released her. She must be the luckiest girl in the world. Coming out of all this with a few scratches and bruises.” Rick sat down on the chair next to him, still shaking his head in disbelief. “Not one broken bone on that girl. And one of the guys who took her had a head trauma and a bullet in his foot before any of us even got there. Can you believe that?”

Daryl snorted. He could. He didn’t even want to imagine what she had to go through. How scared she had to be. But she pulled through.

“Yeah,” he muttered, thinking about all the times she shoved her foot down. Stood her ground. Fought him on the things she believed in. She wasn’t the same scared little girl he protected from two drunk assholes the night of her boyfriend’s party anymore. “Yeah, I can.”

Rick froze, scrutinizing him. Daryl didn’t like that look. He always felt naked when Rick looked at him like that, as if he could see right through him.

“What?”

A bit of silence. And then…

“You taught her well,” Rick said, smiling. Not what Daryl expected at all. Last time they talked about it, Rick was shouting at him. Telling him off for getting involved with her. Then Carol told him out of nowhere that Rick thought Daryl was in love with Beth, as if he could tell just from the way Daryl acted. As if it was that obvious. And now what? Now Rick was all fine with it? Daryl would ask, but he wasn’t sure he was ready to go through all the questions Rick would fire right back at him.

“Yeah, well, should’ve taught her better,” he murmured self-deprecatingly instead. Guilt still eating at him, because he didn’t manage to keep her safe. “Make sure she wasn’t gonna get taken.”

“You did what you could, Daryl. And from what Beth told me, you couldn’t have prevented it.”

“What do you mean?”

“Beth remembered how she was taken. She said she was driving to the church when she saw Peterson on the side of the road. He pretended he was hurt, and she stopped because she knew him.” Just like Daryl thought. “They talked, he told her he already called for help, then when she turned to go back to the car, he hit her on the back of the head. Couldn’t have fought him off even if she wanted.”

Daryl nodded. He guessed since Peterson knew about their fighting lessons, he didn’t want to risk it. Although, if Daryl really had to guess, he’d say those men probably didn’t pay too much attention to it. He wouldn’t. She was still just a small girl who only took those lessons for a little less than two months. Not enough time to become really good at it. But one didn’t really have to be at a champion level to fight off an attacker, Daryl thought. They probably underestimated her, and she could use it against them.

“Anything else she said?”

“Not much. I didn’t get the full statement yet. She was too agitated after Hershel told her that he knows about your…” Rick stopped, scrunching his eyebrows in thought, as if he wasn’t sure what to call it. He made a vague gesture but then said, seemingly a little bit against himself, “Relationship.” Not so fine with it after all, Daryl thought. “And then, when he told her she was never going to see you again, hell broke loose.” He looked at Daryl like he expected him to ask about it. About Hershel and Annette and their reaction. About Beth’s arguments. But Daryl didn’t need to hear. He could imagine it just fine all by himself. Their anger and hatred. He might have saved her life, but that didn’t erase all the other things he did to her. When Daryl didn’t ask, Rick finished his thought: “I tried asking her questions after they got her to sit down again, but she seemed too overwhelmed, so I gave it a rest. Gonna pay her a visit tomorrow.”

Daryl nodded. They said she’s never going to see him again, huh? Not that he didn’t expect this. Still, it hurt to hear. And it didn’t sit right with him that he wouldn’t be able to see her, talk to her, and make sure she’s okay anytime soon. Not until he leaves this place at least. And not before he faces Hershel and Annette.

It stung.

But what stung even more was that the last time he saw her, they were standing in the middle of the woods, and she pushed him away from the harm's way, putting herself on the line. If that bullet didn’t get him, if it flew lower and slightly to his left, it could’ve been her. It could’ve been her blood on the grass, not his.

“And what about you?” Rick asked after a moment of silence, and Daryl looked up to see Rick still watching him closely.

“What about me?”

He thought she was dead. For a second there. Right after he woke up from what was the worst nightmare of his whole life. She was dead. Her blood spilling onto hospital tiles. And there was nothing he could do.

He woke up and for a second he thought he was looking right into the face of the woman that shot her. Except it was Gorman that took a shot, no other woman was with them, and it didn’t make sense for the blood to spill on the hospital tiles. They were in the woods. Weren’t they? Daryl had never been more confused than in those first few seconds after he woke up.

It took the nurse, Dawn, a good five minutes to calm him down. He only did when Rick came in and told him that Beth was alright. Alive. In one of the hospital rooms. With her whole family taking care of her now.

Daryl was so out of it he didn’t really remember ripping the IV out of his veins, and he only agreed to go to the MRI tests when Rick promised him that he’d ask Hershel and Annette if he could see Beth. Part of him wanted to simply burst out the door and go look for her, but he had disrespected her family enough for one lifetime. Sneaking around like this. Being the reason she lied. Not protecting her well enough.

“Are you going to try contacting her?” Rick asked. “You know, against her parents’ wishes?”

Daryl gave Rick a hard look.

“Why? You gonna lock me up again if I do, Sheriff?” he drawled, still a bit salty about the way Rick tricked him into coming to the station. Even if he understood why Rick did what he did.

“Stop. You know I didn’t want to do that,” Rick defended himself, but he still looked like he felt guilty about it. “And I’m not asking as a sheriff. I’m asking you as a friend.”

Daryl sighed. He knew that too, but it was easier to deflect, to be sarcastic, than face the harsh truth of this whole situation. That truth being that if he ever thought he had even an ounce of a chance at convincing Hershel and Annette Greene that he wasn’t some kind of predator and that he actually wanted to do right by their daughter, that chance flew out the window the moment those goddamned photos were sent out to everyone in the precinct. Or, well, maybe a little later, when Hershel actually saw them. It was Shane who showed them to him, because who else?

Rick said Shane went over his head. It was confidential sensitive material, and showing this kind of thing to family members was usually out of the question. But Shane decided it was Hershel’s right as a father to know what was going on with his daughter. He went behind Rick’s back, and once Rick learned about it, the milk has already been spilled, and there was nothing to be done about it. And now here they were, and Daryl couldn’t even blame Beth’s parents for not wanting him anywhere near her. Knowing Shane, he probably added a bit of flair to the story too, telling them that there was no way of knowing when this thing between Beth and him started, that he could’ve been abusing her behind their backs for years even. Sure, Rick probably tried reversing the damage (not that he knew when it started), but it wouldn’t be enough: the seed of doubt had already been planted. Now they wouldn’t trust anything that came out of Daryl’s mouth, he was pretty sure about that.

“So, will you?” Rick wanted to know now, and Daryl sighed, then shrugged a little defensively.

“I dunno,” he muttered.

Maybe I’ll try convincing them to let me check on her. Once I’m outta here, Daryl thought. At least once. So he could make sure that she was still breathing. That it wasn’t just a cruel lie that she survived. If they don’t let him, he’s probably going to follow her to college—check on her once she’s in Atlanta. But Daryl didn't want Rick to know that. He wasn't sure why exactly. The words just didn't want to leave his mouth.

Rick watched him for a moment. Silently. Considering him again. Just like he did back at the precinct.

“You never told me when or how it started with Beth,” Rick noted finally.

“I dunno,” he mumbled again, “depends what you’re askin’ about.”

It hit him, just as he said it, that if Rick was asking about their relationship, it had only been two weeks, really. Two weeks since they gave in. But hell, he’d been feeling this way about her long before that, so saying it started then would be a damn lie. When, then? He still wasn’t sure. Was it back when he agreed to train her at the start of summer? Or was it the day before, when he kissed her, telling himself it’d be the last time? That didn’t sit right, either. She’d been messing with his head for months before that. Maybe it was that damn Founder’s gala, when she fixed his tie in front of the whole town? Or later, when she kissed him for the first time? Nah, that didn’t feel right either. There was nothing casual about the way his heart damn near stopped when he saw her on that stage. Nothing casual about how it felt to have her in his space, acting like they weren’t surrounded by people, putting her hands on him like it was no big deal. No, whatever was goin’ on between them, it was already there, in full force, even if he’d never admit it back then.

Rick scrunched his eyebrows.

“What do you mean?”

Daryl breathed out a sigh. He wasn’t getting out of that one, was he?

“Did you find out why our DNA was on the crime scene?” He tried anyway. Wouldn’t be himself if he didn’t try to deflect, avoid talking about his feelings.

He didn’t want Rick to leave here with the wrong idea, but he didn't know how to talk about it. How to say it all out loud like it was nothing: I mean, I was delusional about it for most of the time. Telling myself I didn’t feel the things I felt. Telling myself I wasn’t gonna do nothin’ about it. So, I'm not sure. Might have started a month ago, two, perhaps even more.

Looking back at it, he could swear he’d been falling a little bit more in love with her with every interaction they had until it simply became impossible to ignore. And it was inappropriate because she wasn’t eighteen yet then, so he wasn’t really keen on sharing that thought, but some part of him liked her from the moment she spoke to him in the woods on the night they were all searching for Sophia. Daryl was reeling that night, nerves eating at him as he looked for Carol’s little girl—guilt, worry, and anger wreaking havoc in his mind—but then he felt Beth’s weight against him, heard her soft voice addressing him, and it all went pleasantly silent for a moment. Her presence was comforting in the way it had no right to be. Like she was sipping warmth into him, even then, even though she was a complete stranger. Silly and inappropriate. That’s what it was. Perhaps that was the real reason why he went off on her when she knocked on his door with that damned apple pie in hand.

But Rick didn't have to know any of that.

“We did. I think.” Rick reached for the file he had in his hand and pushed the picture from the crime scene into Daryl’s hands. “We found this buried next to Marlene Mitchell. Bet you recognize it?”

Daryl could only nod, looking down at the picture of his red handkerchief. He remembered thinking briefly that he must have lost it somewhere. Not really paying any mind to it. Forgetting what he used it for that day he let himself put his hands under Beth’s dress.

That’s why there was both his and Beth’s DNA on the scene.

Ugh, gross, he thought, deciding to delete this information from his mind the moment it stopped being relevant. Probably the moment Rick leaves the room.

“Yeah, I do.”

Rick nodded, taking the picture from him.

“Peterson survived Merle,” his friend said next. “Thought you’d like to know. We put him in the hospital across town. He’s under 24/7 surveillance. Once he’s recovered, we’ll make him talk. He has some questions to answer. That’s for sure.”

“And then?”

“For him? Death row, probably.” Good, Daryl thought. Then realized he probably wouldn’t live long enough to be executed anyway. Merle had a lot of friends in jail.

“They might want you and Merle on the stand. And Beth too. But we’ll worry about it once it comes to it.”

“Did you figure out what that Gorman guy was doing there?”

“No, and we probably won’t unless Peterson starts talking. You know how he wrote about the deal he had with someone in some of the notes you found?” Yeah, Daryl knew; he thought it was like a deal with the devil or something when he first read it. Didn’t expect it to be about a real person. “He didn’t say nothin’ about why Gorman even wanted any deals with him. I mean, why not turn him in the moment he found out? They were cousins, but still, pretty strange for Gorman to cover for him like that.”

“Yeah, unless he was a sick motherfucker, enjoyin' hurtin' little girls too.”

"Good thing he won't hurt anyone else," Rick reassured, seeing Daryl's face scrunch in discomfort, and Daryl let out a breath, trying to relax, if just a little. Rick shot that bastard in the head when he got to them. Saved Beth's life when Daryl couldn't. However, when Daryl tried thanking him for it before, Rick shook his head and murmured, "Just doin' my job, that's all," so now Daryl swallowed the urge to thank him again. Instead, he simply nodded and then groaned when Rick asked again, unrelenting:

“So, when did it start?”

Notes:

Ah, I almost forgot (no I didn't).
Yes, you deserve a sequel.
I deserve a sequel.
Does that mean we're getting a sequel? XD

Chapter 33: You didn’t tell her to get dressed?

Summary:

Some conversations are comforting, filled with love and reassurance, while others are difficult and laced with pain. The killers may have been dealt with, but for Daryl and Beth, the battle is far from over.

Notes:

EDIT: I'm sorry guys, but I'm not sure when the next chapter will appear. I will update the story and finish it soon, don't worry. But I need to edit the chapter before updating, check for mistakes and all that, and I'm currently unable to do this.
My grandfather died last week. We've been very close since forever, he was one of the most important people in my life and I'm having a hard time dealing with this. His funeral is this week and I'm not sure how I'm going to survive that either. I just know I'm not going to be in the right state of mind for editing or publishing anything.
I know some of you check this story for updates every day, so I decided to let you know. I don't want you to think I suddenly abandoned this story, but I won't be able to update it this week for sure. Maybe the next one, but I can't make any promises. I'm a mess.

*

Every time I think to myself: you all can't surprise me with your amazing responses to this fanfic, you guys blow my mind.
I'm sorry I'm not responding to every single one of your comments—I want to, I can promise you that.
But I’ve run myself into a corner this month and last with some work and studying-related stuff, and now I'm kind of deep in it. That's why I'm editing and posting chapters here and writing some sequels instead of doing what I'm supposed to (#procrastinationmybestfriend). Still, I don't have enough time to reply to you all, but I LOVE YOU GUYS! You're amazing! <3

PS: If anyone wants to find me on Tumblr, my username there is monainneverland. Just FYI, I reblog things about a lot of stuff, not just TWD—this girl has a lot of obsessions, alright? XD But I did just get back (a few months ago) into obsessing over Norman Reedus, Daryl, and Bethyl, so you'll probably see a lot of it there too. Anyway, you can find me and give me a follow if you'd like, and I'll follow you back! :D I don't really have any other friends who are into Bethyl and TWD anymore, so I'll be more than happy to get moots—hit me up if you want.

Now, I believe there's another chapter for you to read—have fun! <3

***

“I didn’t force her to do nothin’,” Daryl started, his voice barely above a whisper. “That ain’t…”

Rick blinked at him, surprised, and before he could get into it—before he could start explaining that those photos of them didn’t do justice to what was happening between them—that Rick didn’t have to worry about when and how it started, because she was eighteen already the first time she kissed him, and he didn’t make her do anything—Rick interrupted him.

“That’s not what I’m asking, Daryl. I know you didn’t.”

Do you? 'Cause I’m pretty sure everyone in this goddamned town will think I did, if they don’t already.

Rick, as if reading his mind, added, his voice taking on that emotional, rough tone it sometimes did when he was being sincere:

“I’m sorry for going off on you like that, back in that interrogation room. I was under a lot of stress, and I… You got me worried there, man. All that evidence against you. No other leads.” Rick shook his head. “But I want you to know, I never, not even for one second, thought you could’ve hurt anyone. I was just mad you put yourself in this position. Alright?”

Daryl nodded, taking his lip between his teeth. Still unsure.

“And Beth?” Rick went on, before Daryl could gather the courage to speak again, and Daryl’s eyes snapped to him at the mention of her name, alert. “I know you found something in each other. I may not understand it yet. I may be a bit weirded out, because she’s been babysitting Judith and Carl for years now, and part of me still sees her as a little girl.” Daryl’s breath caught in his throat. A little girl, little Beth Greene, that’s how most of the people in this town thought about her, how they saw her—so innocent and naive, just like Peterson wrote in those first entries. The thing was, Daryl didn’t see a little girl when he was looking at her. Not for a long time. But he couldn’t force others to see her through his eyes exactly. Couldn’t make them realize she’d grown into a confident, striking woman, who wasn’t going to take shit from nobody. So, as Rick spoke, he could only nod again, his eyes cast down as embarrassment built in the pit of his stomach. But it turns out, Rick wasn’t done. “But I know she ain’t anymore.”

Daryl looked up, catching Rick’s serious, intense gaze on his face. Rick nodded at him now, as if he was agreeing with him, even though Daryl hadn’t voiced any of those thoughts he just had. It’s been that way between them for a while now. It was something Merle teased him about relentlessly, how Daryl could read the sheriff's mind so easily and vice versa—but it had never caught Daryl so off guard before.

“She grew up,” Rick said now, his eyes boring right into Daryl’s, firm and steady, as if he were the one convincing Daryl of it. And perhaps he was. Because Daryl had been questioning his judgment on this for some time now, wondering if he wasn’t just trying to soothe his guilt, pretending she was all grown up when she barely got out of high school. But here was Rick Grimes, who Daryl held in the highest regard—even though he’d never really voiced that sentiment—confirming it to him. Saying it was alright. Saying Daryl wasn’t some damned predator. Not in Rick’s eyes, at least. Daryl felt his throat close from the sudden emotions this realization evoked. He could just keep watching Rick, as his friend spoke: “I missed this before, but I see it now. And I can see how much you two care for each other too.”

Daryl clenched his teeth, swallowing audibly, as he tried pushing the lump in his throat back down. He still felt raw after all that happened—Beth’s kidnapping, the arrest, everyone finding out about him and Beth in the worst way imaginable, Carol’s acceptance, the whole investigation, finding her, getting shot at, and thinking he lost her—so it was much harder than usual to keep his face neutral as Rick spoke. To not let tears show in his eyes as he thought about Beth. About how much he did care.

“Hell, maybe I shouldn’t want to know more,” Rick murmured next, but a hint of amusement in his tone quickly morphed into affection, as he continued: “But you’re my best friend, my brother.” Daryl gulped, his eyes glued to Rick's. “And this is the first time I’ve ever seen you this taken with someone. I’m curious. But you don’t owe me an explanation.” Rick sent him a reassuring smile. “You want me to back off? Just say so, and I will.”

They just watched each other for another moment, waiting each other out. In the end, it was Daryl who averted his eyes first. He thought about it for a moment, about telling Rick to back off. It was something he’d done many times throughout the years of their unlikely friendship—and really, what was it with him and finding people he cared about so far from what he grew up with, from what was familiar?—but he found himself wanting to open up about it.

“I—uh, don’t know when exactly…” he murmured next, words getting stuck in his throat. He still wasn’t looking at Rick, his eyes cast down to his hands. He knew he was going to have to get better at this. At explaining his relationship with Beth to people. Else they’d all get the wrong impression. “It didn’t just start. Not on any particular day. Ain’t that simple.”

“I never thought it was. Knowing you, I’m surprised it did at all, actually.” Rick’s lip quirked up into a smirk at the mean look Daryl had given him. “Beth is more stubborn than you. huh?”

Daryl felt his face flush, but he swallowed down his embarrassment. He looked down to his hands as he spoke.

“Yeah, she is. And you were right before too, that day you caught us, you know?” He chanced a look at Rick. “We weren’t just bumpin’ into each other. It was more than that. I mean, after that night, Sophia…” He fell silent, the words getting stuck in his throat again. But Rick nodded in his peripheral vision, so Daryl didn’t feel like he had to continue this line of thought. He cleared his throat, then said instead: “First, Beth, um, got it into her head that I saved her just ’cause I freed her from that snare and carried her back to her folks, and, um, she came to talk to me.”

Daryl took a breath. It was harder than he thought it would be. How the hell was he going to talk to Hershel about this if he struggled with telling Rick? How was he going to explain himself, convince her dad that… that what? That he’s good enough to be dating his daughter? Yeah, right—only he didn’t really believe he was. Part of him didn’t think he should either. But he would have to do this somehow, try to make it right. For her. Because he knew Beth didn’t like lying and sneaking around, and if he could make it right, then they wouldn’t have to anymore. Then he could take her on dates and do this whole thing the way she deserved.

As long as she wanted him to.

“And that’s how…?” Rick started, but stopped himself when Daryl quickly shook his head.

“Nah. I basically threw her out that day. Didn’t wanna talk.” Rick snorted, and Daryl’s lip quirked up into a small smile. “But then you an’ I found Peterson’s shack, and I started lookin’ out for her, and, um, I know I was only supposed to watch her, but…” Daryl averted his eyes and pushed his thumb into his mouth now, pulling at his skin nervously, before finally allowing his eyes to snap back to Rick’s. He rasped, honest: “I was shit at it. Kept stumblin’ upon her when I least expected, and she just kept tryin’ to talk to me. But—uh, it was just that. Just talkin’. I didn’t think,” he stopped, because that was a lie he just tried voicing. He did think there was something peculiar, something different about the way they’d been together. Even back when he wasn’t sure why or what it was. It was impossible not to notice something was off—the way she behaved towards him, starting with that first night at his place and the morning after. He told himself it was probably typical dumb teenage behavior, sure, but he did think it was strange, the way she just went with the crude jokes about whores and what-not. The way he enjoyed her presence. The way they just slid into this banter so easily. Like he’d never done with anyone else before. Yeah, so maybe it was way more than just talking, too. Maybe they were flirting with each other since day one, basically, and Daryl was only now realizing that.

He cleared his throat, trying to get ahold of his own words again.

“I mean, she was just some girl, you know?”

Was she, though? Was she ever just some girl to you, or did you repeat it so many times in your head that you just considered it true?

Rick hummed.

“And then she just, what? Stopped being just some girl one day?” he prodded when Daryl just stopped there and fell silent again.

Daryl shrugged.

“I dunno, I guess she just… had this way of talkin’ to me. Like she just got me, you know? And she was always so goddamned nice. Was drivin’ me nuts. Never had any girl been this nice to me for no damn reason.” Daryl took a huge breath, turning his eyes away for a moment. It was an understatement. She was so much more than just nice. It wasn’t only about that. But he doubted Rick wanted to listen to him gushing about all the ways in which he found her so damn special it made his chest ache just thinking about it. So he shrugged and added: “Beth’s just different, you know? Never met a girl like her. She made me feel somethin’ I’ve never…” He felt his throat close and cleared it again. Then shot Rick a somber look, his shoulder square, his body tense as he finished: “But I know how it looks. She’s so young, so pretty an’ smart, and I’m… some screw-up, some nobody.”

“Daryl,” Rick interjected, his voice turning a little scolding again. “You’re not any of that.”

“Yeah, well, I certainly ain’t the kinda guy Beth should date,” he rasped back, then added softer, shrugging again, just to make all of these big emotions appear a bit smaller. “Told myself that for months anyway. Told myself, don’t be a damned creep. Leave the girl alone. Told myself I ain’t even lookin’ at her.”

Daryl took a breath, recalling his self-loathing thoughts. All that denial. All that anger he felt at himself for as much as looking her way. It didn’t come easy, making peace with liking her that way, with loving her. But he wasn’t going to get into the details of that. That was something he might talk to Beth about at some point, but he doubted he could share it with anyone else. And it would take time. There was definitely too much to unpack there after he kept it all in for such a long time.

“The thing is, she didn’t want me to leave her alone. Made it pretty clear after the Founder’s Day Gala.” He averted his eyes from his friend, his ears burning, face flushed as he murmured: “She—um, kissed me and it got… kinda messed up after.”

He chanced another look at Rick, wondering if Rick would think him wrong for saying this, for implying that she was the one pursuing him. Rick told him about guys like that, who always put the blame on the girl, who said things like ‘she wanted it’ or ‘she asked for it,’ even though they were repeatedly told ‘no.’ But then again, Rick just told him he’d never thought Daryl could hurt anyone, so it was doubtful he was making the same correlation in his head now.

“I still wasn’t gonna do nothin’ about it. But I wanted to,” he admitted quietly, remembering watching her from across the beach that one day. His eyes sliding down her shoulders, admiring the hair cascading down almost to her exposed waist, his heart squeezing almost painfully at the sound of her laugh. Their eyes met, once or twice that evening, as she looked back, and each time he was left reeling, his skin heating up under her gaze. He hated it, he loved it. Daryl cleared his throat, getting out of his head, his face flushing at the thought of everything Rick could probably see, looking at him now. “And then I started teachin’ her how to fight at the beginning of the summer. We were together a lot.”

Rick was watching him intensely, clearly very invested in this story, as if Daryl weren’t actually butchering it with his anxiousness and lack of storytelling skills.

“We weren’t doin’ nothin’ like in those pics,” Daryl added after a moment, the sudden worry that Rick might take this the wrong way squeezing his guts. “Just trainin’ an’ talkin’, you know?”

Rick nodded, and his eyes stayed warm on Daryl’s face. Perhaps even warmer now, a small smile playing on his lips. It was reassuring, but didn’t help soothe Daryl’s nerves as he got to the last part of this story. He was already glazing over some details, not mentioning all those fights they had, and all the other times they kissed, but now he’d gladly stop talking at all. Because it was easy for Rick to say stuff like this, to just simply state that Daryl fell in love with her, but he wasn’t sure he could push the words out of himself. Not that he was planning to use the word love. He wasn’t saying that to anyone until he found some balls and said it to her, but just generally admitting to being so happy with her that he threw caution to the wind on one of those warm afternoons in the clearing seemed like a big deal. Like saying he loves her without really saying it.

“She—um,” Daryl stopped to clear his throat, his hand migrating to his face for a second as he stole himself. “I lost my damned head for her. Never been this… happy just talkin’ to somebody before. And—um, I stopped kiddin’ myself at that point, I think. Couldn’t pretend not to see how happy she was too. All ‘cause of… me.”

The last words he let out were so silent, he wasn’t even sure if Rick heard him. He was trying to find the courage to say the next bit, when Rick saved him from it.

“So you went for it. Gave in,” Rick supplied. It was a statement, not a question, and Daryl nodded, their eyes meeting again as Rick asked, seemingly innocent, but his eyes were glistening playfully: “Was it around the time you took her to that Fair in Atlanta?”

Daryl scrunched his eyebrows, his stomach squeezing at the mention of that day. He didn’t think the cops did such a thorough job of searching Beth’s phone. Hoped they didn’t. He felt a pang of anxiety, nerves rising at the thought of somebody going through their messages to each other. Something must have shown on his face, because Rick added, his smirk fading away: “Shawn Greene told me. Surprised the hell out of me, to be honest.”

Daryl wasn’t surprised. He should’ve known that’s how they found out about it.

“Bet he wanted to ensure you don’t let me out or somethin’,” he mumbled quietly.

Rick shook his head, suddenly amused again.

“Yeah, well, don’t be so sure about that,” Rick looked pleased now, and Daryl would feel offended, only what Rick said next didn’t make any sense. “At that point, all the Greenes knew about the photos. We didn’t tell them about the DNA. I didn’t let that detail out, ‘cause it might’ve hurt the investigation. Still, everyone was well aware you weren’t getting out. No matter if Shawn came forward or not.” Well, still, Shawn probably thought incriminating him further might help, Daryl thought, but then his brain came to a halt when Rick finished with: “The thing is, he came to tell me I should maybe start lookin’ elsewhere.”

“What?”

Daryl spluttered. The hell?

“Yeah,” Rick laughed, seeing his expression, then supplied a bit more seriously: “He thought maybe we weren’t lookin’ at other leads, you know? Wanted to make sure we did.”

He remembered the night of the Fair. How angry Shawn had been, how convinced that Daryl was the killer, out there to hurt his sister. What the hell changed in those two weeks? Nothing, he was pretty sure. Beth told him that Shawn wasn’t saying anything for now, but it wasn’t like he was happy with it. Quite the contrary.

Rick studied him for a moment, then explained:

“I asked him if he knew something, and he said he’s not sure you’re the bad guy here.” Daryl’s breath caught in his chest. It seemed that Beth wasn’t the only odd one in that family. Perhaps it was the Greene thing—this tendency to make shocking decisions. “That’s when he told me about the Fair. Said he knew about your relationship. Used that exact word to describe it, too, which surprised me, ‘cause none of the other people that spoke up about you and Beth ever put her as your equal in this. Her ex said you were creeping around her; her school friends said you were takin’ advantage of her crush; her parents thought you were abusin’ her the moment it got out; and here was Shawn Greene saying Beth was in a relationship with you.”

“I don’t get it,” Daryl murmured, baffled. “He was convinced I wanted to hurt her. Back at the Fair. Tried beatin’ the shit outta me.”

Rick snorted.

“I know, he told me. Said he still couldn’t be sure, but he had reasons to believe you didn’t hurt Beth. Didn’t want to tell me what reasons. Only said that he saw you together at that Fair, on a date, and that he knew you’d been seeing Beth for the whole summer.”

“And you didn’t get it out of him? What were those reasons?”

This time, it was Rick who shrugged.

“Didn’t really seem to matter much at the time, so I gave it a rest. I knew most of what he told me already. We didn’t know about the Fair, but it hardly really mattered that you went somewhere with Beth a few weeks back.” Rick explained. “I knew it wasn’t you, and I thought if it comes to it, if you’re still in trouble after we find her, I’ll get it out of him then.”

They both fell silent for a while after that. Daryl was lost in thought, trying to come up with a reason for Shawn’s sudden change of heart, but nothing came to mind. He hadn't even seen him since that evening at the Fair. He figured he’d have to ask Beth. Maybe she knew. Then it occurred to him that he wouldn’t be able to do that unless he convinces Hershel and Annette Greene that he’s not a threat, and the nerves he’d felt before hit him again full force.

He didn’t enjoy talking about feelings on a good day and with his friends. But facing Beth’s parents after they saw photos of their young daughter in compromising positions with him? Explaining this? While knowing it was probably going to end with them throwing his ass out and cussing him out of their lives? He would rather show his back to Merle than do that.

“Do you think,” he muttered, his voice low and trembling, “they’ll let me see her?”

Rick let out a sigh at the question, and that never meant anything good.

“Honestly?” Daryl nodded, and Rick ran a hand through his face, then hair. Tired. Exasperated. Then he finally said, his face forming an apologetic expression, and lips pressing into a thin line after: “I don’t know.”

Daryl wasn’t sure what he expected to hear. It wasn’t like Rick had all the answers.

“I mean, I tried tellin’ them, back when Shane suggested you abused her for years,” Rick added, and Daryl scrunched his nose, the notion disgusting. “That from what I knew, you met her this year and only followed her around ‘cause you were helping me out with the investigation. I even suggested this thing between you two might’ve been completely consensual. But all I heard in response was that I should stick to doin’ my job, ‘cause I had no idea what I was talking about.”

They didn’t believe Rick, didn’t believe Beth, and Daryl had no idea what she said to them, but he was convinced she made sure to point out that she wanted it. And they didn’t even let him see her in a public space. So, how the hell was he supposed to convince them? Seemed pretty impossible. Beth was much better with words than him, after all. If anyone had a chance at all, it was her.

“I’m sorry,” Rick sounded apologetic again as he cut through Daryl’s internal panic.

“But it seems that they still see a little girl in her. Just like I did. They’re stuck on this idea of you corrupting her. It’s no good.”

Daryl pressed his lips together. He didn’t expect it to hurt so badly—it was exactly what he thought would happen if anyone discovered their relationship. Maybe he just wasn’t prepared for it to happen so soon, or maybe it was just that this was yet another emotionally draining problem he had to face, but hell, did it hurt. It was overwhelming. He felt like somebody kept punching him in the gut over and over again every time he heard the word abuse in regards to him and Beth.

“Alright,” Rick stood up after another moment of silence passed between them. “I should let you rest now.” He got up to leave, and Daryl laid down again, his head full of clashing emotions and thoughts. He barely noticed it when Rick stopped at the doorway, not until his friend spoke again: “But hey. You’re gonna figure it out, Daryl.” He would’ve snorted, had been on the verge of doing so, when Rick added: “And let’s get dinner once you do, alright? Take Beth with you too.”

He closed his mouth, his teeth clicking as he watched Rick smile at him knowingly. As if Rick was well aware, even after Daryl’s little unsure I dunno earlier, that Daryl wasn’t planning on giving up on this thing with Beth. No matter what anyone said. Hers being the only opinion that counted.

*

 

Beth had never been grounded before. Nor had she ever had bars on her windows before. But it turns out that sneaking off to meet a much older biker and lying about it for months can get you both of those. Not even getting kidnapped and almost murdered eased her parents’ disappointment and anger at all the lies and secrets—her outburst in the hospital only made it worse. At least they stopped blaming Daryl only, Beth thought. Now they were blaming her as well.

“I can’t believe you’d just blackmail your brother like this, Bethy.”

Her mother watched her with sad eyes. They were sitting in the living room three days after she escaped the murderers. All the Greenes had gathered for this conversation, as according to their father, it was a family matter. Something that their family should take a lesson from. For her, it felt more like another punishment.

“And to tell him all those cruel things, as if we could ever love him any less, no matter who he chooses to love. What did I ever do to make you believe me to be such a bad mother?”

Beth cast her eyes to her feet, silent. It seemed that Shawn came clean to them and was met with an entirely different reaction than they both had anticipated, but clearly, the same courtesy wasn’t going to be extended to Beth.

Beth shrugged.

“You do seem to be pretty judgmental of people,” she said, her filter still down after their argument at the hospital.

She hadn’t seen Daryl since he was shot. Since she saw him lying on a stretcher, unconscious. Beth hated it. She hated her parents for taking her home that day, not letting her stay the night and sneak into his room. She had already been planning on doing that when Rick and Shane were asking her about the events of the last few days. But then her tests came back alright, and seeing as she suffered no injuries, she was released. They only advised her to see a therapist. Talk it through.

“Judgmental? Just because I saw right through that beast of a man…”

“His name is Daryl, and if you’re so good at seeing right through people, I wonder why you liked Axel so much back in the day. So kind, so sweet, right?”

Annette gulped, disturbed by her words, and Beth raised her eyes to meet Maggie’s surprised gaze. Since that first argument in the hospital, her sister had been looking at her as if she was seeing her for the first time. But truth be told, they all were. Well, not all. Shawn wasn’t. Beth met his eyes now, and he quickly cast them down, avoiding her, as if he felt guilty somehow for what was happening now. For telling on her. As if it would change much if he kept this one thing from them.

“Bethy,” her father’s voice had that special tone again, the one that meant he was going to scold her. She’d never heard as much of this voice directed at her specifically as she did in the last few days. “That’s no way to talk to your mother. You need to stop treating us like we’re your enemies.”

That’s what Shawn told her two weeks ago now, after he found out about her and Daryl. It seemed like an eternity had passed since then. It all happened so fast. Her and Daryl. And then the kidnapping. Just a little over three days ago, she thought she was going to die. They should give her a break, she thought, not ambush her like that under the cover of talking it through, helping her through it.

Beth glanced at her dad, just as he said: “We only want what’s best for you, and I don’t mean your mom and me only. Shawn and Maggie would do anything for you too, you know that, right?” Her father’s voice became softer, less scolding now, almost as if he was trying to apologize to her too, without saying the words. “So if any of us were too hard on you in the past, if anything we did made you act out, it was because we were worried, because we wanted to help you, keep you safe. You must know that.”

Beth nodded, tears gathering in her eyes again. She understood that. She just wished they would understand her too. She wished they’d stop trying to find out how Daryl manipulated her. She wished they’d stop acting like he was just like Gorman and Axel. Another monster who tried to hurt her. One they needed to protect her from now. She wished they’d stop treating her like some darn kid. More than anything, she just wished they’d let her go to the hospital and see Daryl.

“I was safe,” she told them then, her voice shaking. “I was always safe with Daryl, Dad. And I know you don’t believe me, but he didn’t hurt me, okay?” Her voice wavered, her throat closing. Please, understand, she pleaded—not for the first time. “We just fell in love, and I’m sorry I lied about it, I’m sorry about what I did to Shawn and that I hurt your feelings, but… I’m not some kid that needs your protection anymore, and you can’t keep me locked up here forever either.”

“Don’t be silly, Bethy,” her mother opposed, her voice soft, but her eyes hard on her face, lips trembling slightly at every single mention of Daryl. “We’re not going to keep you locked here.”

Hershel nodded.

“We’ll drive you to college on the day you’ve picked. Obviously. Far away from this mess.”

Her parents informed the Emory administration about the situation, and they agreed to Beth starting the semester a few days late. It was what the therapist suggested, seeing how affected Beth still was by it all: waking up at night in a cold sweat, reacting to the gunshots on TV with panic. She’d been trying to conceal her reactions, but it was hard to do so when the image of Daryl’s bloody face was what came to her mind every single time. They should’ve let her see him.

Beth nodded now, too tired to argue that driving her away from this, away from Daryl, wouldn’t change anything.

“Yes,” her mom added, “and once you’re there, Maggie will keep an eye on you.”

Beth pursed her lips. Maggie will keep an eye. This was just getting worse and worse. They were treating her like a baby who needed supervision. Acting like they could keep her from seeing Daryl forever.

“And I hope that when you come and visit us, this insanity,” her father continued, “will be long gone and forgotten, and you’ll come to me then and admit that we were right.”

Beth didn’t manage to keep the snort in. Her mother gasped, and her father straightened his back, hearing it, but she didn’t care.

“You’re not,” Beth hissed. “Daryl didn’t make me do anything I didn’t want, and he didn’t use me either, okay?” She repeated herself, having no other ideas on how to convince them. “I’m in love with him, and he’s in love with me. He broke out of the precinct full of cops for me.” Beth heard about it on TV. Only a fragment of it, before her dad turned it off. The journalist was standing in front of the court, talking about two vigilante brothers going after murderers and rapists, about Daryl getting out of the precinct full of cops somehow and coming to her rescue. They didn’t really seem to know how it happened, though. “He took a bullet for me too. What else does he have to do for you to see it for what it is?”

None of her words made the desired impact. Her parents didn’t want to hear it, and anytime she made a good point, they came back to how she lied to them because of Daryl. How he made her turn on her family. How he used her infatuation with him to fulfill his sick fantasies. How this was all kinds of wrong and she was just too young to see it yet. Beth just couldn’t listen to it.

That third evening ended up with Beth shouting at her dad again, reminding him of his own words back in the day, of how he thought it was good of her not to be prejudiced toward Daryl. Well, now he was pretty prejudiced himself. Hypocrite, Beth called him, and that’s when her mother sent her to her room. Like some misbehaving child. “As long as you live under this roof, you are one,” her father said when she tried to argue they couldn’t treat her like that, and then her mother had to add, “And don’t forget who’s paying for your college, young lady.”

Beth spent the next hour after that crying her eyes out again. She was just getting her emotions under control when Maggie knocked on her door. The last few days, neither of her siblings commented on what was being said between her and their parents. They were both surprisingly silent throughout it all, as if the whole matter left them speechless. Maggie only spoke reassuring words to her, all in soft tones when Beth cried her eyes out after every conversation with their parents, and Shawn kept his distance, avoiding her like she had the plague. So, it wasn’t really surprising to see Maggie at her door. What was surprising was the light, teasing tone in which she addressed her when Beth agreed to talk.

“Admit it, this whole Daryl thing was just to prove me wrong, yeah?” Maggie joked, and Beth snorted in response, the first ghost of a smile in the last few days appearing on her face.

“Yeah, right. I have nothing better to do than kiss bikers just to prove to you how much of a rebel I am.”

Maggie didn’t have to know that Beth thought about her words at least a few times when doing things their parents wouldn’t approve of. It was enough that her mother thought her love for Daryl was just a phase, a silly crush he took advantage of. No need to make Maggie consider it as well. Unless she already did.

Maggie surprised her, though, when a moment later, she sat down next to her on the bed, her voice turning into a gentle murmur as she asked:

“Look, I know our parents don’t want to hear anything about it, and I don’t entirely blame them. I mean, it’s a bit of a shock, B, but… I’m here, and I’m willing to listen to your side of things, you know?” Beth blinked at her, a little bit shocked too. Maggie smiled, encouragingly. “I want to understand how this thing with you and Daryl works. If you want to share that is.”

Beth wanted to. After all these months of bottling her feelings, battling shame and guilt, telling someone sounded amazing. But…

“You promise not to be all judgy about it?”

Maggie snorted.

“Me? Come on, who do you take me for, huh? I once dated a married guy, remember?” Beth giggled, and Maggie joined her. “And he wasn’t even the worst of them!”

That’s when Beth told her everything. Beginning with how she couldn’t stop thinking about Daryl after he gave her a piggyback ride, about Jimmy’s party, and spending the night at Daryl’s place after. For the first time since it happened, she told someone just how bad it made her feel that all the kids in school started bullying her after Jimmy’s awful rumors. She didn’t even tell Daryl about it—and maybe for the best, ‘cause who knows what he would’ve done to Jimmy if he’d known. Maggie was seething with rage when Beth recalled all the cruel words and the days she spent crying, but she didn’t interrupt Beth.

Then Beth revealed to her that, at some point, she realized she was developing a really strong crush on Daryl and recalled all the accidental meetings she had with him. Beth blushed and giggled when she spoke of all the sweet, adorable, or hot things Daryl did that made it even harder for her to not obsess over him. She cast her eyes down when she spoke of the kiss she didn’t remember and the fight they had because of it, and how it led to the first time she fumbled with a guy and enjoyed it. How Daryl awakened something in her on that day that just kept growing from that moment on. How she realized at some point that it wasn’t the same kind of crush she had on boys before—that it was much stronger and of a different nature entirely. That she was experiencing true love, true desire for the first time.

To her surprise, Maggie blushed too, listening to it with wide, shocked eyes. It was a bit embarrassing, a bit strange to be talking about this with someone after all that time, but once Beth started, it was hard to stop. She wanted, no, needed someone to finally know about the sweet torture she had to endure during her training with Daryl. And if Maggie blushed at the first mention of making out, when Beth ventured into this part of the story, Maggie’s face turned into a tomato. Her sister didn’t make her stop, though, so Beth told her about all the little touches, their kiss in the woods, about how it felt to be pressed into the ground by him, how she would do anything he asked of her right then and there, then the fair, the Ferris wheel, and the dog Daryl won for her that Beth slept with now. Kissing him in the booth. Shawn. Sneaking out through the window to spend the night at his place, having her first sexual experience in the woods, and enjoying all the sexting and sleepovers. Thinking about losing her virginity to him.

Maggie giggled at all the right parts, uttered a silent ‘no way’ a few times, and covered her mouth with her hand on the more spicy bits, looking at Beth yet again as if she was seeing her for the first time. She also kept nodding every time Beth gushed about Daryl, anytime she spoke about how hot he was, how torturous it was to look at his arms, those torn sleeves leaving nothing to the imagination. Maggie even drawled under her breath, “Good Lord, that’s hot,” a few times, giggling with Beth right after.

Beth thought, That’s how it should be when I told Amy and Lilly about Daryl. That’s how my best friends should have reacted, not with either rage or warnings.

Once Beth finished, Maggie thanked her for telling her all this and hugged Beth for a very long time. She didn’t comment on how it was still wrong or how Beth should find herself a better man to be obsessed about. Instead, as they were lying in bed together that night, still hugging, Maggie first started coming up with what they could do to Jimmy to make him pay for being an asshole, and when Beth couldn’t handle laughing anymore and told her to stop, Maggie told her the story of her brief but intense acquaintance with Feral Angels members.

She mentioned Daryl a lot, telling her about the time he kicked her ex-boyfriend’s ass when he took some drugs and became aggressive toward Maggie, about how quiet and reserved Daryl always was at the parties, how he didn’t really look like he wanted to be there, and how he gave Maggie a lift a few times when Johnny was being an asshole and didn’t care that she had to get back home. Beth listened to it with a little smile on her face, her heart swelling at the thought of her man being there for Maggie when she needed it.

On her fourth day at home, Beth was crawling out of her skin. She needed to get out. She felt reckless and started to think that perhaps she could sneak out somehow. Beth wasn’t sure if something showed on her face or what, but that day, Dad decided to take her with him on one of his veterinary house visits.

Beth didn’t want to go—she wanted out of the house—but for the first time in her life, she took no pleasure in accompanying him. Yet Dad made her. He said it would be good for her, to which she responded that he didn’t seem too interested in doing good by her before, not letting her see Daryl. That was the last thing they said to each other before jumping into the truck. They didn’t talk the entire ride, either.

Beth wasn’t sure anymore if he was more disappointed in her, or if she was more disappointed in him—for not treating her like an adult, for not listening to her at all, and for casting judgment upon Daryl so easily, so unfairly. He’d never acted like this before, never dismissed her feelings like that either.

Dad only spoke to her after she panicked upon seeing and smelling blood in the barn, but Beth dismissed him. She didn’t want his care, didn’t want his pity. She wanted her dad back. The one who trusted her, who cared about her opinions and feelings first and foremost. That whole trip was a mistake, and Beth decided to push it to the back of her mind the moment they got back. She didn’t even stop to talk to anyone before locking herself in her room for the rest of that afternoon.

A few hours later, she saw Merle for the first time since the night Daryl was shot. She was watching the news again, and the screen flickered to the scene in front of Dixon's garage. Beth straightened up, her breath catching in her chest.

Journalists were swarming the house as the CNN anchor informed everyone that Merle Dixon had just been released from custody. Merle had been taken in for assaulting Father Matthias, breaking Daryl Dixon out of his lawyer’s custody, and attempting to murder Axel Peterson, but he was cleared by the judge on account of stopping dangerous murderers. He was now coming home, the anchor reported.

A car stopped in the driveway, and Merle stepped out, followed by an unfamiliar woman in a suit—Merle’s lawyer, if Beth had to guess—and Rick. They both did their best to walk Merle through the sea of reporters as quickly as possible. Beth waited, expecting to see Daryl next, but nobody else stepped out of the car.

The space filled with voices as all the men and women pushed themselves into Merle’s orbit.

“Mr. Dixon! The whole country is calling you and your brother heroes! Did you know that?”

"Why did you risk your lives like this?”

“Mr. Dixon, what’s next? Hunting other bad guys?”

“Commentary, Mr. Dixon!”

“Where’s your brother?!”

“Say something!”

One of the journalists shoved a mic right into Merle’s face, and Merle shoved him back. Then, Merle turned to the throng of reporters, his mean grin widening as the cameras zoomed in. He leaned into the nearest microphone, his voice a sneering drawl that carried over the crowd.

“You want a statement? You nosy, soul-sucking motherf—”

The TV flickered and went black. This time, it was her mother who turned it off. Beth huffed with annoyance and went back to her room, but one of the reporters' questions couldn’t leave her mind for the rest of the night.

Where was Daryl? Had he left the hospital? Was he back home? If he was, why hadn’t he come to see her yet?

Beth wished they hadn’t taken her phone. She was dying to hear Daryl’s voice.

Beth’s brother came around on her last night at home before college, just a day later. She decided not to stay home longer—she needed to get out, and college was the perfect opportunity. Still, Beth was getting mad nerves from the moment she woke up that morning. Not only because she was moving out, but also because she hadn’t heard from Daryl this whole time, her phone still confiscated by her parents. He didn’t show up at her doorstep that day either.

What was he waiting for? Was he even okay? What if there had been complications with his head injury, and nobody told her? No, Beth thought, no—Daryl was fine. Rick said he was okay. The bullet had just grazed him.

It was an hour or so after everyone had gone to sleep when Beth went downstairs to get a glass of water. She drank it in silence, looking around the living room. Then she tiptoed to the main doors, realizing that, this time, her father wasn’t sleeping on the couch guarding the door like he had every other night.

What if she just left? She didn’t have car keys, so she’d have to walk to Daryl’s. But she’d already been kidnapped once—was it likely to happen a second time? And so soon?

She could risk it. Just go. See him tonight instead of waiting until her parents left her in her dorm in Atlanta to contact him.

Beth managed to only put her hand on the handle when Shawn walked out of the downstairs bathroom. They both froze, then Shawn moved to join her at the door.

“Want to go get some fresh air?” he whispered, breaking the silence, and pushed the door open for her. “Go ahead.”

Beth stepped outside, not fully understanding what was going on. Since when was he nice to her again? And what was he doing here instead of being in bed?

“I’m on couch duty tonight. Told Dad he’s going to injure his back if he keeps at it,” Shawn explained, as if reading her mind.

So they were still guarding the door, as if she was some criminal ready to make a break for it.

Beth glanced at the field in front of her. Perhaps she could make a break for it, even with Shawn awake. But was Daryl back home? She hoped so. Then again, wouldn’t he have come to see her if he were? Perhaps her dad had told him to stay away. Beth wouldn’t know. Nobody was telling her anything.

“Maggie told Mom and Dad they’d lost their minds thinking you’d sneak out like that, but they didn’t want to listen,” Shawn said.

Beth snorted to herself. After all she’d told Maggie, her sister knew better than anyone else in the house how little Beth minded breaking rules for Daryl. But her parents, unfortunately, seemed well aware of at least some of what she’d done.

Thanks to those damned photos. Not the fair ones—the ones Axel or Gorman took when Beth and Daryl were too busy with each other to notice. Rick had shown her the day he came to take her statement.

It was awful that their privacy had been invaded like that. It was one of the things that made her so angry, she wished she could have seen Merle beating Axel into the bloody pulp he’d ended up as.

Beth shook her head, trying not to dwell on it now. There was no point in being angry. What happened had happened, and she couldn’t change it.

They sat outside on the terrace, watching the darkened farm for a few minutes before Shawn spoke again.

“Here.” He pulled a wallet out of his pants, took a strip of photographs out, and handed them to her. It was then that Beth noticed Shawn was dressed in his day clothes, even though it was already midnight. She scrunched her nose at him, wondering if he was going somewhere, before focusing on what he was holding in his hand: their photos from the Fair.

“I didn’t give them to the police. I told them what I knew about your relationship—about Daryl taking you to the Fair and seeing you in secret in general. I thought it might help, you know, but… um, it didn’t feel right to give this away.”

Beth took the photos from him and smiled down at their silly faces. That Fair was one of the best days she’d ever had, and she’d had a lot of happy days before, so that said something.

“Daryl said he wanted them back, so…” Shawn added, shrugging, trying to play it cool. But something in his expression made her think he really cared about doing right by Daryl now, for some unexplainable reason.

“Thanks.” Beth raised her head to look at her brother. She reached out to stroke his arm, and he didn’t flinch away from her touch the way she thought he might. After all, she had blackmailed him. “And I’m truly sorry for what I said that day, you know, at the Fair.”

Shawn nodded.

“I know. I’m sorry too. I shouldn’t have attacked him like that. I guess you were right—I did let it go to my head, what the town folk were saying… and I treated you like a kid too.”

Beth offered him a reassuring smile, remembering what Daryl told her in the car on their way home from the Fair. She realized now that he was right.

“No. You were just worried, and I get that. You couldn’t have known it wasn’t like that.”

“Yeah, but… wasn’t it? At least a little?” Shawn found her eyes. There was no anger in his features, just curiosity. “Dad didn’t let us see the photos, but, um, I heard them talking about it. The way it sounded…”

Beth felt a blush creeping up her cheeks, but it wasn’t embarrassment that surged through her at the thought of those photos locked in the evidence room for everyone to see—it was anger. Fury, even. Beth shivered.

“I’m so mad at that monster for taking those photos. It’s… Nobody should’ve seen that. It was a private moment, and it just…” Beth’s voice cracked with emotion. “Daryl’s special to me, Shawn. I’m not lying about it when I say that I wanted it all. And it wasn’t only about sex. It was more than that. It is more than that.”

Beth sighed, trying to blink the tears away from her eyes. She was tired of having to explain this to people, of trying to convince them. All she really wished she could do right now was see Daryl. “But now… I’m not even sure if I’ll get the chance to give him those photos back… not for some time, at least.”

She looked down at their silly faces smiling at her from the photos. God, he made her so happy.

“So, maybe you take ’em. You should be the one to give them to him anyway.”

Beth handed him the strip back, and Shawn took it, even if a little hesitantly.

“I’m sorry,” he repeated, that guilty expression from before back in place. “And I’m… sorry for telling on you too. I didn’t want to bring up that blackmail thing, but when you went missing, things just… escalated so quickly. We were all so afraid and stressed. Not sleeping at all, just looking and looking everywhere, but it wasn’t going anywhere. Every single time I took a turn into those woods, I was expecting to see you lying in some damned roses. Dead. Like Sophia. And I felt so useless, so powerless. I just thought I needed to tell the cops what I knew, just in case it helped, you know? But Mom and Dad got so angry when they heard I’d been keeping it from them…”

Beth could easily imagine that. Her parents would want answers. Why didn’t he tell them the moment he found out? Why cover for her? Shawn didn’t really have any other option but to tell them, Beth thought.

“It’s okay, Shawn,” she interrupted him, hearing his voice crack. She didn’t want him to blame himself anymore. She was pretty sure it wouldn’t have changed much anyway if they didn’t know about the Fair. She still wouldn’t have been allowed to see Daryl. They still would’ve treated her like a child.

“No, it’s not.” He shook his head, but he didn’t seem angry at her. If anything, he seemed just as disappointed with their parents as she felt as he uttered: “They just kept pushing me, blaming me for your disappearance. Mom said if I’d only told them before, Daryl would never get the chance to take you, and I… I just snapped. I told them that if it was really him that took you, then you were probably having the time of your life up until his arrest. You should’ve seen their faces. They thought I lost it.” Beth couldn’t help but snort a little at that. A moment later, it stopped being funny. “And I think I did a little, ’cause the next thing, I was telling them not to worry, ’cause you seemed perfectly fine hanging with your damned boyfriend and blackmailing me about mine. Well, I shouted it at them, more like. And then it kind of went from there.”

“Oh, Shawn,” Beth whispered, reaching for his arm and squeezing it gently in her hand. Shawn shrugged, as if it was nothing that he was pressured into coming out to them after all. As if it was nothing that they blamed him for something that was completely out of his hands.

“It didn’t really change anything. Only made it all worse, actually. They were still mad at me, and because you were gone and emotions were running high, we didn’t really talk about it much at all. Me being… gay. But hey, at least they said they still love me, so…”

“I’m so sorry you had to go through it like that. It should happen at your own pace, not like this.”

Shawn shrugged again, but there were tears in his eyes when she leaned into him, her arm coming around him to hug him. He leaned into her too, and for a second, they just sat there, holding onto each other.

“You know what was the worst?” he said after another moment. “I just kept questioning everything. At some point, I even thought they might be right. That it was my fault. Even though I, uh, didn’t really think it was Daryl that took you anymore. I mean, he gave me those photos. It was stupid of him, but he did. And then I…” He stopped himself, his voice almost turning into a sob as he exclaimed next: “God, you’re gonna be so mad!”

“Hey, no, Shawn,” she reassured him, hugging him more tightly. “I won’t. It’s…”

“I went through your phone.”

Shawn found her eyes just as she gasped, shocked by this admission. Beth leaned away from him to watch him as he continued, that guilty expression he’d been wearing since the hospital back in full force.
“It was Monday evening, right after the Fair," he mumbled, his voice barely above a whisper. "You left your phone on the kitchen counter and went to take a shower, and I just… I needed to know what he was writing to you. If he was talking you into doing anything you didn’t want, or, or taking you to some secluded places to abuse you, and I just... I didn’t even consider it breaking your privacy. I thought I was protecting you, and I know it was wrong, but I did. I went through your texts.”

He fell silent for a moment, but Beth didn’t speak. She couldn’t. She felt like her whole life had been thrown open for everyone to see already, even before this. Normally, she would’ve been snapping by now—going off on Shawn for violating her privacy like this, for treating her like some child. But her privacy had been broken so many times in the last few days, and everyone and their mom was treating her like she was some goddamned baby. So, it didn’t really faze her the way it should. It hurt—stung something awful. But Shawn had gone through a lot too. She hadn’t thought about it back at the Fair, but he was right about one thing: there was a serial killer on the loose who could potentially target her. Shawn didn’t know Daryl. In his eyes, Daryl was a potential predator, and she could very well have been manipulated by him.

It didn’t mean he had any right to go through her phone, but Beth understood now why he wanted to protect her so badly. So instead of going off on him, she asked calmly:

“And what? What did you find?”

Shawn blinked, surprised. It took him a moment to find the words again.

“You know,” he murmured, and Beth smiled through sadness.

“Humor me.”

Shawn snorted, bemused, rolled his eyes, and then sighed.

“I found out that you talked him into a motorcycle ride and that he even got you a darn helmet for it.”

Beth couldn’t help but smile again, her love for Daryl outweighing the frustration and anger she had felt a moment before. See? she thought but didn’t interrupt Shawn. I told you Daryl was sweet.

“That you sneaked out, but he kinda tried to convince you not to.” Shawn gave her a hard look at that, and Beth simply shrugged. “And then I went through a lot of dumb texts asking if you were safe, or if you needed a lift, or if you were sure I was coming to get you, or if you wanted him to bring something to eat after your goddamned training. Like, it really screwed with my image of that guy, and I just… didn’t know anymore.”

He took a deep breath, calming himself down a little, then added:

“And as if I wasn’t confused already, I heard you a few days later, talking on the phone. You were laughing and talking about something silly, and he wasn’t bringing you down or anything I’d expected from him. It sounded so… normal.”

Beth smiled.

“Yeah, he keeps complaining about me talking his ears off, but I think he secretly loves it, you know?” she said, a familiar warmth spreading through her chest. “Just don’t tell him I told you that.”

Shawn snorted at this, his stance becoming more relaxed now that he realized she wasn’t going to shout at him.

“Sure, I won’t.”

They looked at each other then, and something else passed over Shawn’s face. His voice turned even more serious as he asked: “Do you hate me now?”

Beth shook her head.

“No, I love you, Shawn,” she assured him, resting her head on his shoulder and squeezing him in her arms before adding: “But you should know you’re an overprotective jerk, and if you go through my stuff again, I’m gonna kick your ass.”

They both snorted a laugh at that.

“That’s fair. I love you too, sis,” he murmured.

After another moment of silence, he pulled her a little tighter against himself.

“How are you feeling?”

Beth shrugged, pulling back.

“I’m just tired, I suppose. I had to talk so much about it in the last few days—Axel, that basement, Gorman, and…” She sighed. “That therapist they gave me thinks it’s good, that I shouldn’t keep it in, but… I’m just so tired of reliving it, you know?” Beth shrugged again, suddenly overwhelmed. “And then there’s Daryl. It just hurts so much… I’m going to college tomorrow, and I didn’t even get to say goodbye. I don’t know if he’s okay or…”

Her voice wavered, a quiet sob escaping her as some ugly feeling settled in the pit of her stomach.

It seemed that all she’d been doing since she got back home was either arguing or crying. She didn’t want to, but tears were coming to her as easily as smiles these days, and as she spoke, one of them dropped from her cheek to her hand. Then another followed.

Beth hated how it all ended. That wasn’t what she’d had in mind for them. Not that she wasn’t going to try and contact Daryl once she got her phone back, but still, she would’ve loved to see him now. It’d been so long since she could hug him properly. Beth talked about what happened with a psychologist, but she knew she wouldn’t be ready to heal from it all until she saw Daryl again. The image of him lying in the grass, blood trickling down his head, was seared into her brain. She woke up in a cold sweat at night convinced that he’d died there. That she would never see him again. Just like her father said.

Shawn was silent next to her for a moment before he stood up abruptly.

“Wait here. Let me get Maggie, okay?”

“Get Maggie? Why?” Beth asked, but Shawn was already inside.

They made their way back out a few minutes later, Maggie fully dressed and with truck keys dangling from her hand.

“You didn’t tell her to get dressed?” was the first thing Maggie said upon seeing her.

Beth was wearing one of her pajama sets. This one consisted of pink waffle-knit shorts and a long-sleeved shirt of the same color.

“What’s going on?” she asked, drawing her eyebrows together in confusion.

“You tell me. You want to see that boyfriend of yours or what?” Maggie drawled, walking in the direction of the truck.

Beth’s heart leaped at the words, but even though it was all she wanted, she still glanced back at the house with apprehension. Her parents’ windows were dark, the house silent, except for the terrace where they stood.

“And what if they wake up?”

“Who cares? They shouldn’t have given me the keys if they didn’t want me to drive." Maggie shrugged. "Are you going to get dressed?” She asked then, and Beth shook her head. Going back up would mean making noise, and she didn’t want anything to get in the way of this. Her siblings must have lost their minds, but Beth wasn’t going to look a gift horse in the mouth.

She squeezed herself between the two of them in the truck, ignoring Maggie’s quip about how she was short of going to see Daryl naked.

“But why? Why are you two doing this?” Beth asked once they left the farm behind.

“We can see you’re hurting, Beth,” Shawn explained. “So we talked about it and decided to help you out. You deserve to say goodbye, at least.”

“Yeah, and it’s unfair how Shawn saw you with Daryl and I didn’t. I thought, I gotta do something about it, you know? My sister and the big bad biker? Won’t believe it until I see it.” Maggie laughed when Beth rolled her eyes at her.

“And what if he’s not there? They might have kept him at the hospital.”

Maggie snorted.

“Once again, who do you take me for? I planned ahead, B.” Shawn cleared his throat, and Maggie corrected herself. “We planned it ahead. Why do you think Shawn talked Dad into giving him the couch duty? And I went to Dixon’s garage to see if Daryl’s back, then told Mom and Dad that I would need the truck first thing in the morning. We were going to wake you up in an hour or so and...”

Beth’s hand shot out. She grabbed Maggie by the arm, her eyes wide.

“You talked to Daryl?!”

She needed to know. Was he alright? How did he look? Beth had to hold herself back from shouting it at Maggie.

“I did, yeah. I needed to know his side of things.”

A nervous tension squeezed her insides. Maggie talked to Daryl. Maggie talked to Daryl?!

“And? What did he say?”

Maggie smiled at her sudden agitation.

“Why don’t you ask him yourself, hm?”

They stopped at Dixon’s garage not long after that, and Beth steeled herself, looking at the light behind Daryl’s windows for a minute before letting herself slip out of the car. She couldn’t believe Maggie and Shawn were here with her, doing this for her.

Daryl must have heard them coming because, just as she got to the doors and raised her hand to knock, the doors burst open, putting them in the same spots they’d been in when she first came to him with that apple pie so many months before. Beth jumped but didn’t move away, and when their eyes met, it took her breath away the way it always did.

For a second, they just looked at each other, pinned to their respective spots by the weight of their emotions—all the fear and desperation for each other. He had his head in bandages, his hair a mess on his head, a worn-out wife-beater t-shirt on his back, but to Beth, Daryl looked perfect.

Daryl’s eyes strayed from hers. He glanced at her cheek and the still-fresh gash she had there. Pain flickered through his baby blues then, his lip disappearing between his teeth in a nervous habit. He looked tired, like a man haunted, and so unsure of himself, standing there in his doorway and watching her with a plagued expression on his face, as if worried that she’d disappear if he moved a muscle.

She almost lost him, Beth realized with sudden clarity, and a silent whimper escaped her.

Daryl’s eyes snapped back to hers instantly, but it was she who took the step.

Beth crashed into him, knocking the air out of him on impact. She wasn’t sure if she jumped or if Daryl hauled her up, but suddenly she was in his arms, her legs circling him at the waist, arms wrapping around his shoulders, pressing herself into him as much as possible.

Beth buried her head in the crook of his neck, her stomach clenching painfully at the sound of his gut-wrenching whimper, so close to the one that had escaped her a moment before. All the emotions she had tried to bottle up over the last few days overflowed now, spilling out with a fresh wave of tears at the feel of his hand in her hair and on her back, holding her firmly against him. It was as if Daryl thought he could undo what had happened, erase it all, simply by clinging to her more tightly.

She squeezed her eyes shut and just breathed him in—the mix of sandalwood, musk, cigarettes, and leather surrounding her and warming her. She was safe. She was home. More so now than she had ever been at the Greene farm, she realized with a start.

It wasn’t until she started sliding slightly down and Daryl hoisted her back up, gripping her under her thighs, that Beth pulled back and met his eyes again. She stroked his neck and cheeks, taking his face gently in her hands. Beth whimpered again when he nuzzled the inside of her hand with his nose and lips, kissing her skin softly in response. This tender caress was all the permission she needed to close the space between them and press her lips to his.

When their lips met, it was with an intensity that stole the breath from their lungs. It wasn’t gentle or tentative but raw and desperate, as though the fear of losing each other still lingered just beneath the surface. Daryl's mouth was warm, the kiss firm, his tongue slipping in between her parted lips without any hesitation, but there was a certain tenderness in the way his lips moved against hers, as if he was trying to memorize her.

Beth felt herself melting into him, her fingers tangling in the wild strands of his hair, pulling him closer. She could swear she would never be close enough. His hands tightened on her thighs, grounding her, and she could feel the rapid beat of his heart as he kissed her even more deeply, more desperately. Daryl groaned softly into her mouth and Beth felt it reverberate through her entire body. She tightened her hold on him, fingers splayed against his jaw.

Beth lost herself in it—the taste of him, the roughness of his calloused fingers as they skimmed up her back, the way his chest heaved against hers as though he couldn’t quite catch his breath. It was a kiss that spoke of everything they couldn’t say to each other for all those days—fear, relief, longing, love.

Time seemed to slip away, the rest of the world fading into the background. In that moment, it was just the two of them, alive, together, holding on as if their lives depended on it.

It all came to an abrupt halt when Maggie cleared her throat behind them, and Shawn mumbled something to her that Beth didn’t quite catch. It sounded suspiciously close to “Good fucking Lord,” though, and Beth couldn’t help but giggle as she and Daryl pulled away from each other, both panting softly.

Daryl smiled, his nose nuzzling hers for a second before he kissed her again, sweet and slow, pulling her back into the moment. Maggie and Shawn could wait a little longer.

Chapter 34: I'll love it, just like every other part of you

Summary:

Daryl and Beth reunite and Maggie surprises both of them with her decision.

Notes:

Thank you all for your kind and compassionate words <3
You're truly the best readers anyone could ask for, and I want you to know that even if I don't always write back, I appreciate every single comment left here. All your support and love – every little comment you leave – warms my heart. THANK YOU!

I'm having a rough time, but I finally had some free time and a strong need to take my mind off things, so here it is: the new chapter.

I feel a little weird knowing that we only have one chapter left after this, but the sequel is definitely coming, and I also have a few ideas for other stories that I might explore in the meantime – I’m just too obsessed with Beth and Daryl to stop writing about them now! It may take some time before I'll be able to post, but I'm not going anywhere.

As for the sequel? I just wanted you to know: it already has a title. I’ll reveal it in the notes at the end of the next chapter :)

***

“How about you invite us in before you two forget how doors work, Dixon?” Maggie drawled teasingly when her previous effort at separating them went unanswered. Her voice was playful but laced with warmth. “We didn’t come all this way just to watch you two smooch on the porch, you know?”

Beth slid down from Daryl’s arms and turned to her sister, an apologetic smile forming on her face, accompanied by the blush that was quickly spreading across her skin. Embarrassment settled itself in the pit of Beth’s stomach as she realized that, for a moment, she had forgotten about her brother and sister entirely. To her utter relief, Maggie was smirking as she watched them, her arms crossed and an eyebrow raised at Daryl, no disgust or resentment evident on her face. Shawn’s eyes flicked between her and Daryl with wonder, his face all red, but he was smiling too, even if faintly.

Maggie nudged Shawn with her elbow before moving in the direction of the house. She was giving Beth a knowing look as she added, “I think there’s a couch inside that might be more comfortable than this one’s bony arms.”

Beth blushed crimson, recognizing the jab for what it was. She shouldn’t have been fixating so much on how hot his toned arms were during her late-night conversation with Maggie. Her sister wasn’t going to let her live that down.

Maggie smirked at Daryl while passing him by in the doorway, earning herself an instant reaction from the man.

“Hey, who are you callin’ bony?” Daryl’s voice raised an octave higher in mock offense as he looked after Maggie’s retreating figure, a playful scowl forming on his face.

Beth couldn’t help but giggle again, the tension from the intense reunion easing thanks to the unexpected banter. The sound caught Daryl’s attention, making him glance back at her. Beth met his gaze with a smile, her heart skipping slightly at the intensity in his eyes.

She took Shawn under his arm and walked him through the door. He looked so unsure of himself, she worried he would just hover by the entrance if she let him—just like Daryl was hovering over her, closing the door and stepping after them, so close she was convinced he was holding himself back from reaching out.

“There you are, Red. Thought you already ditched my baby brother’s ass,” Merle threw at her from where he was leaning on the back of the couch, watching them as they came in.

Beth knew it was only a lighthearted tease, but she couldn’t help shaking her head and answering quite seriously, “Never.” She blushed when her eyes met Daryl’s again. “I mean, unless he doesn’t…”

Want me anymore, Beth was going to say, but Daryl shook his head as well, and even though he didn’t say anything, Beth knew from that look alone. Never suited him just fine. That—or she was just really delusional about his feelings for her. Beth chose to believe the first option, though.

“Right. Anythin’ to drink, Greene clan? We got beer and beer, aaand…” Merle opened the fridge to take a look inside. “Soda? The hell is this doin’ here?”

Daryl rolled his eyes at his act but went to the kitchen counter to help him pour the drinks.

Both Maggie and Shawn settled on the couch, and Merle, having handed them their sodas, hopped onto the kitchen counter. Beth took her own drink from Daryl and watched him carefully as he sat himself on the huge recliner that stood a little to the left of the couch.

All her nerve endings were on fire, urging her to join him there, to not leave any space between them. But after the show they’d given their siblings at the entrance, she wasn’t sure if it was a good idea. So she sat on the couch instead, pressing herself to its side to be as close to that recliner as possible.

Daryl's eyes tracked her every move, and if the subtle way he stretched out his legs—his foot just barely nudging hers—was any indication, he was struggling to keep his distance too.

“How have you been?” she asked him softly, ignoring the fact that they were clearly being watched by the three other people in the room.

Daryl shrugged, mumbling a quiet, “Fine.”

“Fine? Hell no.” Merle snorted in amusement. “I was ’bout ready to lose my damn mind watchin’ him these past few days, grumblin’ and stompin’ around like a damn fool, all twisted up ‘cause he couldn’t lay eyes on that pretty face of yours.”

Beth watched Daryl’s eyes go dark—murderous, almost—as the tips of his ears reddened from embarrassment.

“Shut up, Merle,” he hissed, but when he turned his gaze on her, his features softened again.

Beth smiled, nudging his foot with hers this time, her heart warming as she watched the corner of his lips move up into that half-smile she loved so much.

“Me too,” she admitted quietly, hoping he understood what she meant. “It was awful, not knowing how you were. I mean, you could’ve gotten worse because of that head injury, and I wouldn’t even know.”

“Nah, it’s just a lil’ concussion, that’s all.”

Beth nodded, even though she suspected he was probably downplaying it—never one to put too much attention on himself.

“I was scared they were gonna arrest you too… you know, for breaking out of police custody and all,” she added, trying not to melt under the warm gaze trained on her face.

He gave her a similar look the morning after she told him she loved him—even though he didn’t hear, asleep already when she said it. Still, the way he looked at her that day was different, more intense than any other look he’d ever given her, and it took her breath away. Just like it did now.

“Ain’t like it was some kinda prison break,” Merle interjected from somewhere behind her, but Beth didn’t turn to look at him, too busy taking Daryl in again, looking him over in search of any other injuries. Just in case.

“More like a walk through a precinct full of stupid pigs. Swear to God, you tell ‘em you’re a court clown, you can do anythin’.”

Daryl rolled his eyes at Merle before explaining, still not quite taking his eyes off her. “Aaron’s friend forged some papers. Walked me outta there. We were gonna play it like I never left, but then shit hit the fan, the word got out that I was the one to find ya, and we had to change the story. Told the cops Merle was the one who broke me outta my lawyer’s custody.”

“Yeah, goddamned Holler boy talked to the press,” Merle added, clear disdain in his voice. “Told ‘em we assaulted him too. Yellow-bellied coward. Barely even touched him.”

Maggie snorted, bemused. “You call breaking his fingers barely even touchin’ him?”

Beth had just started to wonder if Maggie was questioning her judgment on bringing Beth here when Daryl supplied, “Only one finger.”

Maggie shot him a flat look, and Daryl cleared his throat, pointedly looking away before speaking again. “But yeah, they arrested Merle for it and would probably get me too, but Rick pinned savin’ Beth and that other girl on us two. Turns out, someone says you saved lives, makes you into a hero? That puts the state into one hell of a forgivin’ mood.”

Beth smiled, suddenly remembering their first conversation.

“See, you are the hero after all.”

Beth leaned forward even more. She wasn’t close enough—she didn’t think it, but she felt it with all her being.

“I ain’t.”

“You are,” she argued right back.

Daryl raised his eyes to her again, his blue orbs boring into hers with an intensity that kept stealing her breath. God, did she love that man.

Beth suddenly wondered about Maggie and Shawn. About what they saw when they looked at them. Could they feel the tension in the air, the electricity flying between them with every next sentence? Could they see now how perfect he was for her? Or was it their age difference, his rough demeanor, his grating voice, and all the other things that clashed with her softness and warmth that caught their eye?

Beth saw his softness too, his warmth etched in his features as he gazed at her, but it probably wasn’t that visible to anyone who didn’t know him well. After all, even Beth didn’t see it clearly—perhaps not at all—when she first met him.

“Didn’t save no one.” Daryl shook his head.

Beth opened her mouth to argue, but Daryl, as if knowing what she was going to say, added, his eyes unrelenting, firm on her face, “You saved yourself. That girl too.”

Was that really what happened? Beth had a hard time seeing it that way, considering how many mistakes she made trying to save them both.

“I was just lucky.”

“You were tough,” he rasped, and the tone of his voice left no space for arguments.

Beth felt her heart clench with love. Daryl had so much faith in her. He wasn’t there when she fought her way out of that basement, but apparently, he didn’t have to be—he believed her to be the hero anyway.

“Smarter than me, too. Wouldn’t be sittin’ here if it wasn’t for you...”

“Stop,” she murmured, the idea that he could be gone making her shudder.

Beth wished she could cross the space between them and haul herself into his arms. She would’ve if only Merle were in the room with them, but Maggie and Shawn sitting next to her made her feel way more bashful.

Daryl shrugged.

“S’true,” he muttered, biting his lip, mulling over something for a few seconds before his voice dropped, low and sharp. “You changed. Just like you wanted.”

Did she? Beth couldn’t see it yet, but maybe there was something to it.

“But don’t pull that again.”

“What? Don’t change again?” Beth joked, trying to lighten the mood that suddenly felt too dark.

Daryl shook his head, a somber expression on his face.

“Don’t go riskin’ your life for mine.”

Beth swallowed audibly, pinned to her spot by his eyes. There was a certain desperation behind his words that reminded her of the moment she thought him dead.

Daryl risked his life for hers as well, did it before she did—looking for her and then going against two psychopathic murderers.

Beth could say that she wouldn’t if he wouldn’t, but it would be pointless—she was well aware.

He’d do it all again in a heartbeat — stand between her and a bullet — and as she held his gaze, Beth hoped he could read it from her face — that she’d do the same for him. Over and over again. It wasn’t something she had any power over. She just knew, deep in her bones, that she could never give him up. Not like this.

She’d tell him that, only the words got stuck in her throat, his gaze leaving her breathless again.

She was amazed by this. By how consumed she was by these feelings he evoked in her.

He could sit there, so far away from her, and still, only with one look, he could set her body on fire. He could cloud her mind with mad desire — not only for his body but for everything else as well.

Beth craved him whole. Him and her future with him.

She wanted to experience things she’d never done with anyone else, wanted to see the whole world, live a full, amazing life filled with adventures, traveling, making dreams come true, and she wanted it all with him.

It was both scary and thrilling to feel so strongly about another person, especially him, with how different they were from each other. With how unlikely their whole relationship was. But did their differences really matter when just sitting here with him made her so happy? When all she wanted was to keep on going? Never stop loving him?

"Or what?" Beth drawled finally, her eyes shining and full of love. She saw the exact moment her cheeky words registered in his head, the way they made his eyes go a shade darker. It sent a thrill down her body, and judging by the gulp of air Maggie took on her right, Beth wasn’t the only one who noticed the sudden shift in the mood between them.

Daryl stayed silent, though, dropping his eyes to his knees as if ashamed of his own feelings showing so clearly, and Beth couldn’t help but tease him a little more, knowing it always lifted his mood when she did.

"Throwin’ around empty threats, Mr. Dixon?"

Daryl snorted at that, the corner of his lips quivering for a moment as he glanced up at her, his eyes full of affection. However, when he finally spoke, his expression turned sour again, his eyes dropping down and away from her and everyone else.

"That bullet could’ve got ya, you know?" His voice was serious, sorrowful, and it smashed the smile off her face instantly. "I had this dream at the hospital, it… I-uh saw it go through your head instead o’ mine."

Daryl glanced up at her, ignoring the rest of the room purposefully, his eyes roaming her face as if, yet again, he had to make sure she was really there with him. Make sure he didn’t imagine it all.

"I woke up and thought you was gone. Thought I ain’t ever seein’ you again."

He shook his head at himself, clearing his throat, and Beth just couldn’t take it anymore. She moved, catching his eyes again as she hauled herself to the recliner he was sitting on. Daryl didn’t fight her on it, instead opening his arms for her when she went to drop down on his lap, pulling her legs up after herself too and curling around him in the way she had wished to do since they came into the living room.

Beth hid her face in the crook of his neck, embracing him in the middle and pressing herself into him in what she hoped was a comforting hug. She sighed when Daryl’s arms circled her too, one of his hands resting on her head, stroking her hair gently. He rested his cheek on the top of her head too, making her feel even more content.

"You don’t gotta worry anymore," she whispered to him. "I’m here, Daryl."

"Yeah, you are," Daryl moved his head up and spoke, addressing her siblings this time. "Thank you."

Beth looked up just as Daryl averted his eyes from her brother and sister, their eyes meeting again, and Beth couldn’t help but smile at the warmth she saw in his blues. It spread through her body along with a shiver, their proximity affecting her even more strongly than usual.

Daryl took her face in his hands, his thumbs stroking her cheeks gently, avoiding the gash she had there. The aching desperation to see him that haunted her during the last few days turned her desire up a notch or two, and she could feel herself going through motions: from desperation to affection, from affection to love, and from love to an overwhelming need to kiss him, touch him, have him all to herself, away from prying eyes.

Daryl took a shaky breath when Beth’s eyes dropped down to his lips, the air between them heating up yet again, and when Beth looked up, it was to see his eyes roaming her face with the same kind of yearning she felt running through her veins.

"Alright. I saw enough." Maggie clapped her thighs and got up, breaking the moment. "Time to go. Come on, Shawn."

"What? Already? But we just got here," Beth exclaimed.

If it wasn’t for the panic that shot through her at the notion of leaving, she wouldn’t have been able to tear her eyes away from Daryl’s. She looked up at Maggie now, pleadingly, but before she could argue her case, ask for another half an hour at the very least, her sister surprised her by saying:

"Relax. I meant Shawn and me."

Maggie was watching her carefully now, assessing her, even though all Beth could do in reaction to her words was open her mouth in shock. Did Maggie really mean what Beth thought she did?

She briefly glanced at Shawn, still awfully red in the face and uncharacteristically silent. He was avoiding looking at Daryl and her at all costs, instead zeroing in on his own boots.

"You—you’re just gonna leave me here?"

"Is that not what you want?" Maggie asked incredulously, a smirk back on her face. She made Beth yelp when she moved and grabbed her by the hand to pull her off Daryl’s lap. "Alright, we’re gonna be right back, boys. Bathroom?"

She looked questioningly to Daryl, and he raised his finger in the direction of it, looking just as taken aback by Maggie’s words as Beth felt.

“Hey, Daryl? Um—” Beth heard Shawn speak just as Maggie tugged her in the direction of the bathroom. “Here, I didn’t give them to the cops…”

Beth turned around, but she couldn’t see the look on Daryl’s face as Shawn handed him their pictures anyway. Just a second later, Maggie pushed her into the small bathroom and locked the door behind them swiftly. When Maggie looked at her again, the smirk was gone, replaced by a soft gaze.

“Look, Mom and Dad are going to kill me for it, let’s not kid ourselves here, but…” Maggie breathed out a huge breath, releasing some tension that was apparently sitting on her chest. “I’m your older sister first and foremost, and I want you to be happy. You’re in love, and maybe it’s not as true as you think it is, maybe Mom’s right and it’s just a phase…”

“It’s not,” Beth interjected.

“Yeah, alright, but there’s no way of knowing that right now, is there? Shawn still thinks it’s kinda strange, Dad’s clearly pissed off, and honestly, I’m not sure Daryl’s the right guy for you. But I can see that you two care about each other. And after everything that’s happened this year, I think you deserve a chance to have some happiness, even if it’s just for a little while.” Maggie nodded, looking thoughtful, a small grimace crossing her face. “Hell, maybe it’s a mistake. Maybe you’ll regret it later. But I wouldn’t be the person Glenn fell in love with if I didn’t learn from my own mistakes first. So… Yeah. Mr. Hot Stuff over there? Go for it, girl. Just... be careful.”

With that, Maggie reached for her hand and pushed some plastic into it, her smile turning a bit unhinged.

Beth looked down to see a string of condoms and scrunched her face in embarrassment.

“Maggie!”

“What? Can hardly leave you here with no protection. You think I didn’t see the way you two look at each other? You could cut tension with a knife in that room!”

They both giggled nervously, and Beth closed her hand around the condoms. Good thing her pajama bottoms had pockets.

“So, you’re fine with that?” Beth asked carefully, even as she pocketed the embarrassing gift. She was feeling all jittery again, her situation finally registering in her mind. Maggie was going to leave her here with Daryl. Alone. Beth could hardly believe it, and the thought of it squeezed her tummy in familiar tension.

“As long as you are,” Maggie admitted. “But fair warning. He hurts you? You ever cry because of him? I’m gonna cut his balls off.”

“I know you would, Maggs.” Beth smiled softly at her sister, and Maggie reached out to hug her. When they separated, she handed her the phone. Not hers—Maggie’s.

“Dad is guarding your phone too well, but take mine, and if you want to come home early or need anything, call Shawn. We’ll come and get you. And if you don’t call, I’m gonna be here at six in the morning, yeah? We should probably at least try to make it back before everyone wakes up.”

Beth nodded, still in awe of her sister. Perhaps she should have known that the biggest rebel in their family would accept her relationship with Daryl quicker than anyone else, but it was still a revelation to her. Shawn had to violate her privacy before trusting her, and here was Maggie, ready to let her make her own choices just one night after Beth told her everything.

“You’re my best friend, Maggs, you know that?” she told Maggie right as the thought hit her. The amount of support and trust Maggie was giving her was uncanny, and she would never get it from Lilly or Amy or anyone else.

“Good, you’re mine too.” Maggie leaned in and kissed her forehead. “We’ll have so much fun on campus, you’ll see. We’re gonna find you better friends than Lilly and Amy too, you know?”

Beth laughed.

“Sure.”

They left the bathroom to an almost empty room. Only Daryl still sat in the recliner, deep in thought, his gaze locked on the pictures in his hand.

“Shawn?” Maggie asked, making him raise his head.

“Said he’ll wait for you in the truck. Merle’s with him, checking that bumper you hit in the mornin’,” Daryl informed her, standing up and walking with them to the door. “You’re one hell of a bad driver, ain’t you, Greene?”

Maggie smiled sweetly at him. He clearly wanted to get a rise out of her for the bony comment from before, but Maggie wasn’t one to back down from a challenge easily.

“Good thing my sister’s man is a mechanic, yeah?” Beth sputtered, surprised by the straightforward way in which her sister addressed their relationship. She glanced at Daryl, who now turned his gaze down, red up to the tips of his ears. “What do you say, Daryl? Free maintenance from now on?”

The mean look he sent Maggie’s way would scare even a hunk of a man, but Beth’s sister only laughed. Beth watched her as she strutted to the car where Shawn was waiting for her, his nose in his phone. For a second, Beth wondered how on Earth Maggie had talked him into doing this. Shawn thinking her relationship with Daryl might have been normal was one thing, but him not fighting for her to come back home with them? Leaving her with Daryl for the night? That was another thing entirely.

Beth felt Daryl’s fingers brushing the outer part of her hand, and her whole attention went back to the biker standing beside her. A familiar shudder went through her when Daryl leaned in over her, his breath ghosting over her head as he murmured a silent:

“Come on.”

Daryl gently pushed his fingers into her hand, her skin instantly catching on fire and goosebumps breaking out, as he pulled her back inside the house.

Beth thought back to how she felt when Jimmy led her upstairs to his room a few months back. She couldn’t believe how different it was in comparison to the emotions taking reign over her when she followed Daryl to his bedroom now. She was nervous—that one was similar—but although she felt all jittery and tingly inside, there was a huge sense of comfort accompanying it too. On one hand, there was the stress. The good kind, the one that makes you excited, not the kind that screams ‘run’ at you. But on the other, she felt at peace. Finally, after this horror-like week she had, she was completely safe. More than that, Beth felt love overflowing her. It was making her heart thud in her chest loudly as butterflies messed around in her tummy. It was making her want to scream from the rooftops. It was also making her fidget with want as she watched Daryl closing the door to his room behind them, the fingers of one of his hands still pressed against hers.

When their eyes met, however, Beth didn’t see the reflection of her own needs in Daryl’s baby blues. Instead, she was met with one of his thoughtful, careful expressions, considerate and full of care. He sometimes looked at her like that during their training sessions, and it never meant anything fun. It meant he was unsure. Beth didn’t like that at all.

“You wanna talk about it?” he asked, letting go of her hand too soon for her liking.

“About what?” she asked, even though she knew what he was referring to. He was looking at her all wrong—not in the way she wanted him to. With worry, not desire. She took a few steps back, glancing around at the room she had slept in twice now, avoiding his gaze.

Daryl mumbled:

“Y’know.”

Beth knew he deserved to know what exactly happened with Gorman and Axel, and Beth wanted to tell him. She really did. Only, she knew that if she started unpacking it all now, thinking about all those awful things again, the mood would never recover from it. She would forever be left with the memory of her crying in his arms in his bed for the whole night on the last night before college, and that wasn’t what she wanted.

Maggie was right. She deserved some fun. Deserved some happiness after what happened to her. Beth wanted to forget all about it.

“Can we not?” she asked him finally after a long moment of silence as she turned to face his worried gaze. “Look, I will tell you, I promise.”

“Yeah, ‘course. You don’t have to,” Daryl shook his head quickly, as if it had just occurred to him that she might feel pressed about the subject. Beth couldn’t help but smile at this man, who put so much care into never pushing her into anything she didn’t want.

“I want to. Just, not today, you know? I’ve been retelling this story so many times—to my family, Rick, the therapist they assigned me... And it just makes me so sad every time. And today, I just want to focus on… feeling happy again. Can we do that?”

Daryl nodded. He was worrying his lips between his teeth again, his thumb going to his mouth in a nervous habit, and Beth was on the verge of asking if he needed help with that—because she would gladly nibble at it for him—when Daryl spoke:
“Want me to put some music on?”

“Yeah, sounds good.”

As he moved to put on some CD, Beth jumped on his bed to try and make herself comfortable. She pushed herself onto his pillows right in the middle of the bed so that he'd have a hard time fitting on either side without touching her. Was that too straightforward? A strong rumble of guitars filled the room, but it wasn’t the sound, but Daryl’s eyes on her as he turned around, that made her tremble.

“Hi,” she whispered as he stepped closer to the bed.

“Scootch over,” Daryl rasped, and Beth almost giggled, suddenly all giddy again.

“No. Come here and hug me,” she opened her arms, showing him exactly where she wanted him.

Daryl watched her like a hawk for a moment or two, his face carefully blank but making her feel intoxicated all the same. Daryl got on the bed painfully slowly, and she couldn’t tell if he was this unsure of himself in the moment or just teasing her.

He was already bracketing her legs with his, his arms near her hips, when he stopped suddenly. He picked something up from the sheets and sat back down on his heels. Beth blushed crimson, seeing the string of condoms that Maggie had given her between Daryl’s fingers.

“Just how hard do you want me to hug you here?” he drawled, his voice lowering slightly and making her skin break into goosebumps again.

This time when their eyes met, Beth wasn’t disappointed. There it was, that haunted, darkened gaze that thrilled her more than anything else, and a hint of amusement, his lips shaking a little, as if he was holding back a smirk.

“How hard do you want to?” she went for a sweet smile that didn’t match the nature of her proposition at all. To her utter displeasure, Daryl stayed still though, not closing the distance between them the way she wanted him to.

Daryl got his lips under control, not smiling after all, and the amusement gave way to worry again as he muttered:

“Beth, you been through hell...”

Daryl’s eyes were searching her face again, all considerate and full of care. Sometimes Beth wished he wouldn’t be so careful with her. But then again, that was part of what she loved him for: this gentleness hidden under his rough demeanor.

“I told you I didn’t want to talk about it,” she repeated.

“I know, but what they did to ya…” Daryl shook his head, falling silent upon seeing the grimace on her face. He started again, his voice dripping with guilt. “I don’t wanna add to that.”

As if he ever could.

“You won’t. Gorman…” She took a breath. God, she really didn’t want to talk about this. “Gorman didn’t get to hurt me. Not like that. I thought Rick must’ve told you.”

He watched her for a moment longer before finally admitting silently:

“He did.”

“So you know nothing bad happened to me.” Beth felt a nervous flutter deep inside as an unpleasant shudder went through her at her own words. They weren’t true.

Something bad did happen to her, and even when she was actively avoiding thinking about it, those events were always somewhere there at the back of her mind. Just the day before, she had to leave Mayers’ barn when the smell of blood from one of the cows giving birth hit her. The whole trip there was a disaster, but Beth thought, at least she’d be able to help. No chance. The stench of blood reminded her of the girl Gorman abused before coming for her, and just like that, she was thrown right back into that situation. She left the barn shaking, sobs ripping through her. On the way back, Daddy tried talking to her about it, putting aside how mad they were at each other at the moment. But Beth couldn’t speak of this. Some words just didn’t want to leave her mouth. Some things she didn’t speak of even with that therapist.

Shawn was banned from playing shooters when she went into a full-blown panic at the sound the first day back at home, her breath getting stuck, lungs constricting. She supposed any similar noises would be a problem now after she watched the love of her life get shot in the head. She supposed that any unsuspected touch from strangers or people she wasn’t that familiar with might be too.

Beth flinched at the memory of Gorman’s hands alone. But Daryl’s touch? No, that her brain knew too well; it spelled only good things to her and was always welcomed, separated from any form of abuse she endured.

“I mean, Gorman tried, he… But I didn’t let him.” She corrected herself, swallowing all those bad emotions. “And I can’t see how you could do anything that would trigger bad memories, okay? Look, just come here, please?”

They stared at each other for another long moment before Daryl finally nodded.

Beth held her breath when he threw the condoms back on the sheets and moved up the bed again, finishing his journey with her underneath him. She looked up at him, waiting as he lowered himself a little, bringing their faces close enough to rest their foreheads against each other. He was holding himself up on his hands, the only point of contact between them their foreheads.

“You want to know what I feel when you’re hovering above me like that?” she whispered, nuzzling her nose against his. Daryl murmured a quiet “What?” in response, and Beth smiled, closing her eyes with a happy sigh. Being surrounded by his smell and feeling the warmth radiating from his body, it all made her forget about the bad things that happened quicker than anything else could. He was here, alive with her, close, and nobody could hurt her now, not with him close by. “Like I’m in the safest place on Earth.”

Being like that with him. Feeling his hot breath ghosting over her skin. The warmth radiating from his body above hers. It didn’t just feel safe. It felt like coming home and at the same time like taking a deep plunge into the unknown. Her heartbeat was thudding loudly in her chest, a deep ache forming inside her. Beth loved every second of it. She just wished Daryl would stop hesitating.

“You are. Ain’t ever lettin’ anyone hurt ya again,” Daryl said, even though they both knew he couldn’t do anything about it the last time it happened. Still, the promise made her heart soar. Daryl leaned in, his lips catching hers in a sweet, loving kiss and fingers caressing her cheek in the most tender manner. It was almost too much, but still not enough when he pushed himself back to murmur: “But we don’t gotta do nothin’ tonight. Ain’t a damn race.”

“No, I know,” she whispered, running her fingers through his stubble, her eyes roaming over his face. God, she couldn’t believe she was really here. She felt like his touch was healing her, replacing all the bad things with good ones. “But what if I want to?”

He shook his head as if disagreeing with her, and Beth murmured: “I do, Daryl. I want to, so much.”

She raised her head a little to meet his lips in another sweet kiss.

“Want you,” she whispered against his lips and felt him shiver above her, a quiet grunt escaping his lips in response.

“You sure?” Daryl whispered, his voice trembling and his breath ghosting over her lips again, making hers hitch.

“I’m sure, Daryl,” she whispered back, one of her hands coming up to cover his fingers on her face and the second tangling in his hair, mindful of the bandage. “Really. You can stop askin’ now.”

Beth brought their lips back together, kissing him with ferocity, the kiss quickly turning from soft and gentle to something much more similar to what they shared at the door. He let out a quiet whine when she deepened the kiss, her tongue sliding past his lips.

“Not gonna,” he said gruffly, separating them for just a few seconds before diving right back in, thrusting his tongue in her mouth with newfound desperation. “I need to know you’re good.”

“I know, but you really,” she gasped when Daryl kissed her jaw, then moved to outline her face with the same sweet caress while his hands finally wandered down, stroking her waist, grabbing at her hips. All gentle, careful. “Don’t have to…”

“Gonna be,” Daryl’s breath ghosted over her skin, right behind her ear as he whispered to her, and Beth whimpered a little louder, buckling underneath him. “Balls deep inside you and still ask.”

Her eyes snapped open at his crude words, and she turned her head to look at him. She was met with a smirk, his gaze darkened again, and Beth couldn’t help but whimper when Daryl caught her lower lip between his lips for just a second before pulling back slightly, his hoarse voice falling down to an almost whisper again, his nose nuzzling against hers: “And you’re gonna answer me. Every time. Yeah?”

Beth nodded, even though it was getting hard to think with his lips ravishing her like that, his hands cradling her face.

One of her hands moved down to his neck and arms and the other stroked his cheek, catching on his light scruff. She was in desperate need to learn every curve, every freckle and wrinkle, every single part of his body by heart.

“Yeah, alright,” she croaked, somehow knowing that he wanted her to use her words even without him stating so.

Daryl’s thumb gently stroked her side, his other hand coming up to tangle in her hair as he lowered himself even more into her, effectively trapping her under himself. This time when he went in to brush her lips, she chased after him, her hand finding his head again and pressing him right back down into her. She wanted to press their lips together, but stopped when Daryl hissed suddenly. He grimaced, and Beth let go of him.

“Oh, your head, sorry, I’m so sorry! Are you okay?!”

“Shh,” Daryl shut her mouth with his lips, the kiss lingering again. Beth melted into it, her fingers trembling as they hovered near his jaw, unsure whether to touch him for just a second or two before the need for him won with apprehension. Daryl deepened the kiss, his lips moving slowly but intentionally, his hand sliding down to circle her hips and then slip under her to round her butt cheek under the hem of her loose pajama pants. The touch of his hand on her skin sent shivers down her spine.

When they finally broke apart, his breath was hot against her as he whispered, “Don’t worry ‘bout me… not my first time havin’ a concussion, or gettin’ shot for that matter. Just gotta be a lil’ more careful.”

She nodded, opening her mouth to ask whether he was sure he could do this, suddenly worried she was the one pushing him into something he wasn’t ready for. There were more questions at the back of her mind. About the other times he was shot or got his head hurt. She didn’t like the idea of it. Of someone hurting him. It made her blood run cold, an unpleasant feeling shifting in her guts. Daryl didn’t let her voice her worries though, his lips brushing the corner of her mouth.

“But let’s go back to ya now…”

“Me?”

Daryl kissed her again, one of his thighs shifting to press lightly against her legs, silently asking for permission. Beth opened her legs for him, trembling again as he settled himself in between her thighs fully.

“Mhmm. If you want me to stop,” he whispered against her lips next, his hot breath dancing on her sensitive skin as he squeezed her butt in his hand, pressing their bodies together. Beth whimpered, feeling him, all tight muscles and sharp edges against her lean, smaller body, his heavy, hard dick pressed into her thigh.

“I won’t,” she promised, sliding one of her legs up his experimentally, squeezing him in between her thighs and whimpering at the way he pushed himself into her in response, his hand nestling even further under her, massaging her delicate skin.

Beth whimpered silently when Daryl pressed his hot mouth into her jaw again and then descended lower to her neck. How could she ever say stop to this? It was perfect. Hot, heady, and exciting. Daryl’s body, even though much bigger than hers, fit in just right between her legs, and his muscles felt hard and lovely under her palms as she traced their outline with her fingers. It felt right. It always felt right to her with him, and no disgusting perverts were going to change that. Beth opened her eyes as the thought of everything she wanted to forget entered her mind. Her heartbeat quickened for an entirely wrong reason, but then Daryl’s lips pressed into her pulse point, leaving another one of his sweet, gentle kisses there, and Beth melted again.

“If you want me to stop, girl, no matter how far we go, no matter if I’m inside you or…” Beth’s breath caught in her throat, a whine escaping her when Daryl’s pelvis connected with hers in just the right way on his first gentle thrust. A matching sound escaped him then, and for a second, he seemed to lose his train of thought as he nibbled at her skin, one of his hands easing itself under her t-shirt and gliding up her tummy. “You want me to stop. Anytime. You just say so, alright? And I’ll stop. Okay?”

Beth nodded, shuddering from pleasure when his erection hit the right spot. She wanted more. The clothes were all getting in the way. Separating her from this sweet feeling of his skin on hers. Beth wanted him all naked and inside, just like he said. There was nothing more important than this now, nothing that mattered more. But Daryl wasn’t having none of it.

“I need ya to use your words, Beth,” he croaked, pulling away slightly, his hand retracting from where it was almost touching her breast. No, no, don’t go…

“Alright, alright. I’ll tell you. Anythin’. Jesus, Daryl, just, just please…” Beth brought him back down by his lapels and kissed him hard, all raw passion and desperation, while sliding her legs up his again, pushing him down and into herself just the way she needed, just where she wanted to feel him, and Daryl answered with a silent moan right before his tongue tangled with hers in another feverish kiss. His hand found its way to her breast, and Beth gasped at the contact. God, it’s been too long since he touched her like this.

“Okay?” he croaked into her lips, and Beth answered him by reaching down to pull her t-shirt up. She already had it up her arms when Daryl reached to help her and shoved the material away, leaving her in her shorts only. She blushed when Daryl’s eyes traveled down to her chest. His own chest was rising and falling in short, rapid breaths, his gaze intense, lips parted with anticipation as he closed the distance between them, both of his hands coming up to cup her, lips closing on one of her nipples. Beth let out a soft, breathless sound. Every fiber of her was burning with mad desire for him and him only.

She swallowed a quiet breath as Daryl moved his mouth to her other breast to kiss and suck the delicate skin there. Beth fisted her fingers in the hem of his t-shirt and raised it slightly, exposing the toned, warm skin beneath, her breath catching as she traced the lines of his muscles. When he caught her hands in his, stopping her, Beth opened her eyes, gazing up at him as she repeated his question at him in a quivering voice:

“Okay?”

Daryl seemed to consider her for a moment, just as overwhelmed with emotion as her, before he drew a tight swallow and rasped:

“My back ain’t pretty.”

Oh. So that’s why you were so nervous that night.

“What do you mean?”

“It’s -uh, old scars,” he murmured. “Have a lot of ‘em.”

Beth searched his face for a moment, before saying, her voice soft and warm.

“You know, before you, I thought I wasn’t…” Beth shrugged, her throat constricting at the memory of all the awful ways she regarded her own body, back when she was with Jimmy. “I thought my body was nothin’ special, my breasts were, you know, small barely noticeable things and…”

“Stop.” He caressed them in his hands again, making circles with his fingers on her skin, leaving her nipples perky and erect. She liked the sight of his calloused, big hands on her, his skin darker than hers slightly. “Your tits are perfect, just like the rest of ya.”

Beth smiled warmly, taking her hands away from his t-shirt and shifting them to his face instead, caressing his cheeks with her fingers the way he did it to her before.

“Yeah,” she said with conviction. “And so are you.” Daryl snorted, but Beth didn’t let him interject with any insecure words. “You are. To me, you are, Daryl, and your back… You don’t have to show me, you know? And whatever happened... I'm so sorry you had to go through it." The words made him clench his jaw, as if the mere thought of it was making him feel anxious, and Beth felt a pang of rage at whoever did this to him. She didn't let it overcome her though. "But if you do show me, I’ll love it, just like every other part of you, okay?”

Daryl’s face turned a shade darker, his eyes glinting in the light, searching her face wordlessly before pulling away from her slightly.

“Okay,” he whispered hoarsely before getting a hold of his t-shirt and pushing it up over his torso, his muscles shifting beneath as he peeled it off slowly, eyes never leaving hers.

She was entranced by the sight of him pulling it over his head and shedding it aside in one swift motion. It hit her again: Good Lord, Daryl Dixon was the hottest man she’d ever seen, making undressing a tantalizing spectacle that left her breathless without even trying, and he was all hers.

When he leaned back to kiss her, Beth let her hands wander across his shoulder, one of them tangling in the hair at the nape of his head, the other moving down to his back.

“Can I…?” She started, not wanting to do something that would make him uncomfortable. If he preferred, she wouldn’t touch him there at all, but if she had any say in it, she would map each and every centimeter of his skin.

Daryl nodded, his lips finding hers again. A shudder went through him when her finger touched the first scar there, and she shivered with him, pain shooting through her heart at the notion of someone hurting him. She kept kissing him through it, deeper, harder, pouring all the love she had for him in that caress.

As her fingers traced the contours of his back, she felt the weight of his past in those scars—each one a story of survival, a reminder of some horrible times, of pain that he had to endure. Perhaps one day he would tell her, just like she was going to recall to him all that happened with Axel and Gorman, but this was not the night for stories of bloody battles fought and won. It was the night for love, passion, and unspoken promises that lingered in the air between them.

The tension in Daryl's body eased slightly under her touch, as if her affection could soothe the ghosts of his memories, and as he drifted forward, bringing their chests together, the atmosphere in the room shifted yet again. They both groaned at the contact, her fingers pressing into the skin of his back with newfound intention and her lips finding his shoulder to leave a trail of kisses on his skin down his broad torso and then up to his neck. Her heartbeat quickened, and heat pooled in between her legs as Daryl’s hands fisted in the material of her shorts with sudden urgency. His lips found her nipples again, but this time he didn’t linger, descending down fast, and making Beth whimper at the thought of having him down there again, with his lips pressed to her wet, warm clit.

She caught her breath as he slipped her shorts along with her underwear down her legs, discarded them somewhere to his left, and turned to her again, his eyes gliding up her naked body, devouring her. Nerves made her squeeze her legs shut, her skin flushing red under his gaze, and it wasn’t until their eyes met that Beth inhaled sharply, the look on his face soothing her anxiety. He reached for his belt, and she followed the movement, the bulge straining in his jeans catching her attention. She swallowed thickly, the sound filling the silence, and his hands stilled. When she raised her eyes to his, he was still watching her, his blues never leaving her face.

He cleared his throat before speaking, but his voice still sounded impossibly hoarse.

“Do you…,”

“Don’t stop,” she breathed out, answering the question he was yet to ask, and Daryl dipped his head briefly, unbuckling his belt in a flash and pulling both his jeans and underwear down in a rapid motion.

Beth couldn’t help the sound that escaped her at the sight of him fully naked in front of her, both the taut muscles and soft edges of his body creating a striking contrast that sent a shiver of desire coursing through her. Her heart raced as she took in every detail, from the hard lines of his chest to the gentle curve of his hips and the trail of hair that went down his tummy to where his erection was standing at full length. It made her think about the last time they were in his bed. When he undressed her and made her scream…

“Daryl,” she whispered, her voice breaking a little on a soft whimper when he neared the space between them, his hands reaching her knees, sliding underneath them, and pushing her legs apart delicately, but firmly. She sucked in a breath at the feeling of his lips on her skin a little beneath her knee.

“Mhmm?” he murmured, seemingly unperturbed as his lips descended lower in between her legs and up, leaving a trail of wet, hot kisses on the underside of her thigh. It was hard to focus on anything but that touch, both his lips and hands climbing up her thighs, locking her in the sweetest kind of embrace.

“Do you think… Merle heard us last time?” she pushed out in a quiet, barely there whisper and blushed deeply at the sound of his quiet, throaty giggle. She would be mad at him for laughing at her, but the sound rippled through her skin, and Beth could swear she could feel it deep in her pussy. It made her whine in response, all words fleeing her at the moment.

Her eyes rolled into her head as Daryl kissed her in the spot where her thigh met her pelvis, his hands coming up to squeeze her ass and hips in a strong, but still pleasant grip.

“Yeah, pretty damn sure he did,” Daryl croaked, one of his hands skimming around her, his fingers running gently around her vulva, not quite touching her where she wanted him to, winding her up instead, as he lowered his head again to nib at the sensitive skin of her inner thigh. It was, all of it was, making her tremble, and she was short of shoving his head when she wanted it when Daryl moved there on his own volition. He nuzzled into her and she squealed, feeling him scenting her in one of the most private parts of her body. Beth barely heard him, too consumed by the pleasure, when he rasped:

“But don’t worry, darlin’, he ain’t here now.” Where was he? Gone in the middle of the night like that? She’d ask, only it was really hard to focus now. “So, be as loud as you want, okay?”

She nodded faintly, a breathy “yeah, okay” fleeing from her mouth alongside a loud, uncontrolled moan when he slipped his tongue out to taste her finally.

It was novelty. Every single time he was touching her, kissing her, it felt just as amazingly good and exciting as the first time. And it was an experience like no other, having him there, licking her clit, first gently, almost teasingly and lazily, and then… feeling his tongue hitting that toe-curling spot that made her cum so hard the last time. It never felt this good when she was touching herself, she never made herself lose her mind the way he did with just a few strokes of his tongue. She suspected it wasn’t only about the way he was touching her, it was simply about it being him, the sensation of his hands roaming through her body adding to the pleasure significantly, just as those little sounds escaping him, as he licked and sucked into her with reverence. As if it was just as pleasurable to him, as if tasting her was bringing him to the edge as fast as it was her.

In no time Beth was wiggling underneath his ministrations, loud moans ripping through her throat as Daryl sucked onto her clitoris. Her orgasm shot through her whole body, her pussy constricting and juices flowing under his touch. It hit her hard, arching her back and making her press her legs together, sandwiching his head in between. She shuddered under his hands, her own coming to tangle in his hair and keep him in his place as she was coming down from it. Daryl didn’t seem like he wanted to move either, and even when she unclasped her tights, freeing him, he stayed put, licking into her gently, unhurriedly.

“Daryl,” she whispered and interrupted herself with a moan when he slid his other hand up her tummy to grip her breast and play with her nipples. It was too much. It wasn’t enough. “Daryl, please, I want you… I want you inside me.”

Beth flushed bright red at her own words, but it was worth it to embarrass herself to hear the groan that escaped Daryl upon hearing them. He still didn’t move though and Beth shuddered when she felt his finger joining his tongue, pressing gently into her clit. It was almost too much, having Daryl do this so soon after her orgasm hit her, but Beth would lie if she said it wasn’t also torturously pleasant.

She swallowed thickly, trying and failing to regain control over her mind as his finger circled her entrance, teasing her and slipping in a little, cautiously, just to begin this journey anew. He was never pressing fully in, too gentle, leaving her yearning for more.

Beth gasped when Daryl’s mouth left her clit to kiss her inner thighs again and then bit into her lip, catching a needy whine when he pressed his second finger in, stretching her even more. Daryl moved up her tummy to where one of his hands was playing with her breast. She watched him as much as she could, laying kisses on her sensitive skin, given as her eyes kept rolling to the back of her head with each and every slide, every circle and gentle prod of his fingers slipping in, curling inside her slightly and out of her in an agonizingly slow rhythm.

Daryl’s other hand embraced her neck, his fingers grasping the hair at the nape of her neck, while his lips sucked on her right nipple, making her squirm under him again. Then he moved up, hovering over her again, and Beth whimpered at the sight of him, hair messed up, his lips and chin covered in her juices, eyes dark and yearning as he watched her right back, tracing the lines of her face as another orgasm ripped through her.

It only left her desperately needing more though, needing him, the heat wreaking havoc under her skin, interested in one thing only. The feeling only intensified as she watched him pull his hand up from between her legs, his fingers disappearing in his mouth as he licked the taste of her off them. Beth moaned, her pussy constricting both from her orgasm and from the desire for more. Daryl looked downright sinful. She wouldn’t be able to watch him eat without thinking about this ever again, that much she knew.

Then Daryl lowered himself down, their bodies sliding together sweetly and his lips catching hers in a deep, filthy kiss. She whined, tasting herself on his tongue, her hands descending down to his round, sexy ass that she thought of touching so many times during the last few months. She pressed him down into herself, his hot, pulsating erection pushing into the heat of her for just a second before Daryl pulled away with a groan, his hand reaching to the side to snatch one of the condoms he had discarded there earlier on.

Her throat worked visibly as she watched him rip the plastic, a nervous flutter settling itself in her tummy again as the thought occurred to her: it was really happening. She was going to lose her virginity to Daryl Dixon. And it was going to happen now. He rolled the condom onto himself, his chest heaving as his hands sneaked under her knees again, pulling her down and closer to him. She squealed at the motion, another heat wave hitting her at the sight of him positioned in between her legs with his huge erection standing tall.

Daryl was flushed, his breath coming in short, little gasps, hands trembling as he stroked himself a few times, eyes dark and filled with lust when they found hers, but he still asked, his voice a gravelly, breathless thing: “You sure?”

Beth dropped her eyes to his hard dick and then trailed them up his tummy and broad chest, his toned arms and collarbones, up his strong neck and scruffy little beard. She slid them up to his blue eyes, her chest rising and falling rapidly with each breath she took. She was a mess and all because of him, and the best part? It was just the beginning.

“You promise not to rip me apart with that thing?” She teased him, glancing down for a second, and laughed when it made him let out a breathless giggle even as he flushed bright red.

“Ain’t that big,” he rasped, leaning down and over her again, her tummy squeezing with anticipation at the movement, her legs spreading more to let him back in. She was shivering like a leaf, her whole body trembling with a mix of nerves and desire, barely able to keep herself steady. The thing was, he was big and Beth doubted those two fingers he pushed in her a few seconds ago were anywhere near enough to prepare her for him.

“Maybe you just never looked at it from where I’m at,” she whispered back at him, her eyes cast downwards to where he was positioning himself near her entrance. She was so still, so frozen, she forgot to breathe and didn’t even realize until the air pushed itself out of her lungs when Daryl took her chin in his fingers and made her look up at him instead.

“Girl,” he rasped. “Beth, relax. Ain’t doin’ nothing you don’t want me to, remember?”

Beth nodded, her throat closed off by nerves that only eased up a little when, on his next move, Daryl caught her lips in a sweet, gentle kiss. His other hand moved up and to her face as well, embracing her, his thumbs stroking her cheeks as they tasted each other again. And when Daryl pulled away, it wasn’t to thrust into her, but to smooch her nose, then her cheeks, one by one, her forehead and eyelids, the way he did back at the garage over a week ago. Daryl kept pecking her all over her face, and Beth couldn’t help but laugh, the sound light and full of warmth.

She surged up to kiss him lightly on the mouth again and then opened her eyes, her nerves finally letting up. Now she could only feel her heart swelling at the tenderness in Daryl’s eyes as he looked down at her, his throat working hard as he swallowed audibly.

His head bobbed slightly as if he was assuring himself of something, before he nuzzled his nose into hers for a second and, upon pulling back, said hoarsely, his voice barely above a whisper and so full of emotion it made her gasp even before the words fully registered:

“I love you.” His voice broke slightly, the words rough, foreign on his tongue. “You know that, right?”

This time when Beth’s breath caught in her throat, it wasn’t because of nerves or anything remotely similar. She just didn’t expect him to utter the words like that, as if it was just some simple truth, not a groundbreaking revelation. And she guessed it wasn’t, shouldn’t be, as he basically admitted to it at the Fair. She could feel that love in every one of his stares, every touch and smile, every affectionate gesture, and even in each of his texts. But still, hearing him say it out loud? It hit differently, sending a wave of warmth and certainty through her that left her breathless. It was as if, with those simple words, he’d unlocked something deeper between them, a promise made real.

“Yeah, I do,” she answered him softly, “I love you too, Daryl.”

He kissed the smile off her face, bringing their bodies together again and slowly reigniting the fire inside her with gentle touches and warm kisses. His hand slid down her side and grabbed onto her hip again, angling her in a way that let him slide his erection through her damp folds, the novel sensation making her moan and shiver under him. She brought her hands up to his shoulders, gliding them through the curves of his upper body yet again, starting the journey of learning him anew, her legs coming up to circle his behind, to press him to her even more snuggly. Each one of his movements brought a moan out of her, her clit oversensitive after all the attention Daryl gave it before. Still, it felt even better now when she could share her pleasure with Daryl, feel him down to every vein as he pressed himself into her, his grunts, stifled moans, and whimpers accompanying hers and sending shivers down her spine.

“I’m ready now,” she uttered when another thrust almost made her crumble underneath him. “Daryl, please…” She felt her pussy pulsate with need for him, and it was becoming painful, the teasing motion that was hitting her clitoris just right, but still wasn’t filling her the way she wanted to.

Daryl pulled away just enough to line himself again, his dick hard and hot against her. Daryl’s weight on top of her was filling her with warmth, his breath tingling with hers and eyes glued to hers, searching for any signs of discomfort as he pushed just the tip of himself inside her.

Beth let out a soft, breathless sound at the sensation of being stretched like that, and Daryl grunted above her. Beth clutched at his shoulders in a desperate attempt to steady herself, her fingers dug into his skin, holding on as if he were her only anchor. Her pulse was racing, heart jumping with every slow, careful movement of Daryl’s hips.

He stopped instantly when she grimaced at one short stab of pain, but as he moved to pull out of her, Beth panicked and pressed the heels of her feet into his ass, keeping him inside her.

“I’m fine, just…” she took a breath, the sensation so foreign, but so good, it was almost too much, too overwhelming. “Just wait a second, okay?” She asked, her lips finding his and searing them in another fiery kiss. He gulped when just a few seconds later she pushed him deeper into herself, urging him to move again.

“Jesus, Beth,” Daryl grunted again, his breath erratic and heartbeat fast under her palm.

They both gasped when he bottomed out, her walls constricting around him as another shudder ran through her at the sensation of being so full. It was strange and arousing at the same time, the short pain long gone and forgotten, swapped with curiosity and desire. Beth watched Daryl close his eyes, his breath coming in short gasps as he stilled inside her.

“You can move, I promise,” she told him when he was still clutching onto her tightly, his eyes squeezed closed and forehead resting on hers, unmoving above her a moment later.

“Can’t,” Daryl rasped back, though, the timbre of his voice making her shiver. “You’re too damn tight.”

Beth swallowed tightly, his rough voice sending shivers through her. Daryl seemed to be holding on by a thread, and seeing that, seeing him so affected by this, by her, was making her feel impossibly turned on, even though she already came twice that day.

“I- I just need a moment,” he explained, and Beth couldn’t help but kiss his next breath out of his lips, her tongue finding his in a feverish caress that left them both panting.

“Or… or what?” she asked curiously, drawing back, her hips moving slightly and erupting a quiet whine out of him. He got a hold of her hips and pushed her into the bed more firmly, keeping her still with his strong, muscular arms. Hot. Good Lord, he’s so hot, Beth thought, and she couldn’t help but try moving anyway, wiggling underneath him and pulling another desperate sound out of him. His eyes finally snapped open then, finding hers almost instantly and pinning her with a look so intense it made her heart race. There was a hunger in his gaze, a primal need that mirrored her own, and in that moment, all teasing melted away.

“You really want me to lose control, don’t you?” he murmured, his voice low and gravelly, sending another wave of shivers coursing through her. Beth swallowed hard, excitement shooting through her veins at the notion of him wanting her that much. Of him barely holding himself back from pounding into her with no restraint. The sudden thrill the words brought to her must have shown on her face because Daryl smirked at her next, his nose nuzzling against hers as he murmured softly: “That what you want, huh? For the big bad biker to rough you up a lil’?”

Daryl moved then, slowly pulling back, almost entirely out of her, before sliding right back in deliberately and deeply, the motion emitting a surprised moan from her. She whimpered when he added, in a hushed whisper, his hot breath ghosting over her ear as he lowered his head: “Maybe next time, huh?”

Beth gulped at the idea and the pleasurable heat wave the next thrust brought. It was as if the world around them stopped spinning, her whole being narrowing itself to this little moment, to this man’s strong arms around her, to the smell of him and the feeling of his body hugging her tightly, harder than she thought possible, harder than she thought she wanted, and oh so sweetly, and as her body trembled with desire, her heart soared with love for him. Nothing mattered except for him here with her right in that moment.

“Yeah, yes, please,” she mumbled, not really knowing what she was asking for, her focus entirely and solely on the way Daryl was moving around her and inside her, his thrusts becoming less cautious and more urgent with every broken sound that left her mouth. “Please, Daryl…

“Is that right?” he asked, his voice nothing more than a rough rumble. “Want me to go faster, sweetheart?”

“Yes, do that, yeah,” Beth answered, her voice catching on a loud moan as he did just as she asked, thrusting into her faster, his dick filling her so well, so good, her pussy pulsing already and mind reeling from how amazing it felt. But it still wasn’t enough. She needed more.

“Daryl, please,” she moaned, and he answered her with a noise so loud, it made her whole body vibrate from desire. “More, I need, I need you to…”

Beth interrupted herself on a moan as he grabbed onto her ass, lifting her a little, the angle changing and allowing him to drive himself even deeper.

“Oh my God, Daryl!”

“Yeah? Harder now?” Daryl asked, his voice breaking a little, and Beth just nodded feverishly, her eagerness pushing strained, guttural sounds out of him. Each nod, each whispered “yes,” seemed to spur him on, his movements growing more intense as he watched her fall apart beneath him, completely captivated, and as she gazed up at him, she felt herself crumbling, her throat closing on another loud moan.

Each motion sent waves of heat coursing through her, building a tension that made her ache for release. Daryl’s breaths grew heavier, matching the rhythm he set, and she could feel the raw carnal power in his movements as Daryl drove her closer to the edge, the primal sound of their bodies moving together filling the room alongside their moans. Beth’s fingers tangled in his hair, urging him on, her breath coming in quick gasps as pleasure coiled tightly within her. “Daryl,” she rasped, the sound more of a plea than a name.

Daryl kissed her again, and if she thought their other kisses were hot and filthy, then she was wrong, because this one beat them all by a mile with how hard, how forcefully he thrust his tongue into her mouth, a close resemblance to the way he pushed himself inside her at the same time. Beth moaned into his mouth, gripping his head more tightly as she strained her neck to kiss him just as deeply. She whined and chased him for a moment when he moved away suddenly, creating more space between their bodies and panting as he brought her legs to the front and pushed them up her chest. She squealed at the sudden change in angle, a wave of pleasure hitting her even more intensely now, and if she thought she was falling apart before, now she ascended to another plane of existence entirely.

“Hold your tights for me, darlin’,” he rasped, and Beth obediently brought her hands up to hold onto herself.

She watched him with dark, desperate eyes as he brought his fingers to his mouth, then pushed them inside his mouth the way she’d seen him do before when he was licking her juices off himself. It reminded her of each and every time she was watching him clean his fingers after eating, so hot, so dirty, it drove her crazy. And now he wetted his fingers with his tongue in exactly the same manner, making her gasp involuntarily. She was already strung out from just watching him do that when he sneaked his hand down and between her legs to massage her clit again. His other hand found her breast, and when Daryl roamed into her with a new deliberate pace, all Beth could do was let out a set of even louder, more wretched sounds out of her, her tights trembling where she held onto them. The combination of his hands and his rhythm sent her spiraling, her senses overwhelmed by the heat of his touch and the intensity with which he moved.

His eyes locked onto hers, dark with intensity, and the way he smiled down at her sent another wave of heat coursing through her.

“That’s it, sweetheart,” he murmured, his voice rough and low, igniting a spark deep inside her. “Just let go.”

Beth felt the coil of tension tighten to the breaking point, her body responding to him instinctively, drawing closer to the brink.

“You too, please, I want to feel you, I want you to…” she breathed, her voice trembling with emotion, not quite able to articulate what she wanted from him. If the way Daryl's grip on her hips tightened, holding her steady as he thrust deeper, he understood her all the same.

“Yeah, gonna fill you up, don’t worry,” he rasped, stealing a dirty, wet kiss, his weight pressing her legs even more firmly into her chest, his voice a sultry whisper that sent shivers down her spine. The pressure built within her, overwhelming and intoxicating, as she clung to him, teetering on the edge.

And then, with one final, deep thrust, everything snapped into clarity, her legs falling off to the sides and him diving in deep, letting out a surprised moan as she constricted around him. Waves of pleasure washed over her as she cried out his name, holding him tightly against herself. Daryl’s movements faltered for just a moment, and he followed her into bliss, hot and pulsing inside her.

Breathless, he collapsed onto her, their hearts racing and bodies entwined, and for a second, there was only pleasure, only this beautiful static in Beth’s head, her body shivering and breath coming in huge bursts as her chest heaved.

Daryl eased himself out and off of her delicately, the loss of him registering in her mind instantly. He was closer than anyone ever was to her, buried inside her just a moment ago, but even when he started leaving wet, lazy kisses on her shoulder and collarbones, even as he moved down to give her pussy a few last strokes, his eyes locking on hers as he did, Beth thought she’d like him to get closer again. More. She always wanted more with him, it seemed. Her face was either an open book, or Daryl was just that good at reading her, because after making her gasp breathlessly a few more times, he pulled back to smile at her.

“Not enough for you, huh?” Beth blushed furiously, nodding, and Daryl smiled again as he moved up her body, their lips sliding together for another sweet kiss, before he moved away entirely.

Beth watched him as he lay down next to her, not quite believing that this man really belonged to her with all his rough edges and taut muscles, with those amazing calloused hands and sultry mouth. She was obsessed with him, with his lean body, his toned arms and strong legs, with his facial scruff and blue eyes that seemed to pierce right through her.

Everything about Daryl was captivating, from the rugged angles of his face and his dreamy physique to the gentleness he showed to those lucky enough to glimpse the real Daryl under that silent, brooding demeanor. And that, she thought, was the best part – how much more there was to him than you’d ever think, how beautiful was the soul that he carried inside, how thoughtful and compassionate his heart was.

Daryl opened his arms, indicating for her to move, and Beth happily complied, snuggling herself into him, pillowing her head on his chest and sighing when he kissed the top of her head, hugging her to him even more tightly as if he too had trouble believing she was really here and his.

When he spoke again, Beth felt the rumble of his voice vibrate through her. “You alright?”

“Yeah, I’m good,” Beth whispered, her voice soft and a little breathless, her throat tired from the effort. She shifted slightly, feeling sore, having never been stretched like that before, but it wasn't nowhere near as bad as she feared. “I thought it would be... different, you know? I’d heard it was supposed to hurt the first time, but with you, it was... beautiful. Really beautiful. And so hot. I mean, darn...” She looked up at him, her cheeks flushed as she smiled, her heart racing. “Let’s just stay here and do that for the rest of our lives, okay? Screw the rest of the world.”

Daryl snorted at her words, but as he reached down to brush a strand of hair from her face, his eyes were warm and full of love, and instead of ridiculing her or getting offended at how unsheathed she was, he murmured against her hair: “Don’t worry, I ain’t done with ya. Just give me a few minutes, yeah?”

Beth couldn’t help but let out a short, joyful giggle, hugging him to herself tightly again as she uttered:

“Sure, yeah, but… Daryl?” She hesitated, her voice soft but laced with a touch of curiosity. He grunted in response, acknowledging her with a tilt of his head. “Will… will that count as the next time or...?"

Chapter 35: Ain't never felt nothin' like this

Summary:

Daryl and Beth lose themselves to pleasure, but when the night ends and the new day comes, will they be alright? Will everything work out the way they want it to?

Notes:

EDIT: I was advised to make this fic a part of a series and let you guys know so that you can subscribe to it and be notified when I publish the first chapter of the sequel - so here I am letting you all know this is now officially the first part of a series 😊

And here we are. The last chapter. Feels a bit unreal, to be honest.
I'm not gonna lie—this has been a wild ride. Editing, rewriting, and publishing this fanfic consumed the last 5 months of my life—and honestly? It was awesome. Hard at times, because I really wanted to make sure that everything feels right for Beth and Daryl, and that even though it's an AU, they are close to who they are on the show, if only slightly different because of the no-ZA trauma and all. Every encouraging, amazing comment that you left for me made me want to get even better at it. I went back and forth between editing the chapters, rewriting, and adding chapters that weren’t there at the beginning because I wanted it to be even better, both for myself and for you all. It’s been truly rewarding work, though.

I want to thank you for putting a smile on my face with every kudo and comment left, for being so kind and supportive—and for leaving me tips on how to improve my writing as well. I went and edited the first chapters again to make sure there are no mistakes—although there are still a few, probably. Sorry for that! Maybe I'll reread it again in a few months and get rid of them too. ;)
Okay, who am I kidding? I probably will. ^^

Good news is: I'm sticking around. I think. I hope. I have a few ideas for other stories... but also, as I already told you, I have an idea for the sequel to this story and a title for it too—you wanna know the title? See the end notes. <3
I want to write a few chapters before publishing anything, though, and since I have a lot of other stuff going on, I'm not sure how soon I'll be able to do that. So, I'm saying: I'm coming back, but I don't know how soon that's gonna happen. Maybe I'll post something shorter first too. ;)
But I'm definitely not leaving this fandom. This community is awesome, and it's been a while since I felt so happy to be part of any fandom—#teamdelusionalforever. xD

Alright, time to finish the rambling and let you get to it.

***

“So, what did you tell Maggie to make her bring me here?” Beth asked him as he nuzzled his face into the hair at the nape of her neck, his torso pressing into her back and legs tangling with hers as his hands roamed over her body in yet another sweet exploration.

He’d told her he just needed a few minutes, but then they both drifted off for an hour or a half—Beth wasn’t sure. All she knew was that when she woke up, the lights were off, she was under his covers, and Daryl was pressing himself into her back, his hot erection sliding through her ass cheeks teasingly. He wasn’t pushing them to do anything just yet, though—just nuzzling into her, touching, kissing the back of her neck, her shoulder, and back. It was torturous, and Beth needed a distraction if she was going to stay still like he wanted her to. She tried turning at some point, but he didn’t let her, his arm sneaking around her chest to press her even more snugly into him. It was as if they were back at the clearing, with him taunting her, giving her only a taste of what she wanted.

“The truth,” Daryl rasped back, his hand massaging her breast almost lazily. The words were leaving him in a hushed, hoarse tone, his breath ghosting over her ear as he spoke some of the most romantic words she’d ever heard: “Told her I knew I didn’t deserve ya.”

“That’s not true,” she whispered back and moaned when Daryl took her nipple between his fingers, pinching it lightly and effectively shutting her up.

“That I knew I wasn’t right for ya,” he said next, and Beth gasped. Don’t talk like that, she wanted to say, but barely got past:

“Don’t…” Daryl nibbled at her ear, his hand closing on her second breast, and her sentence ended on a whimper.

“Ya wanna hear or not?” he murmured, and Beth could only nod and let out a breathless, “Yeah,” her head swimming in a foggy daze.

“I know I should’ve never dated you. Told her that too,” Daryl uttered then, his mouth descending lower to leave a trail of wet kisses on her neck. “But it all don’t really mean nothin’, ‘cause you wanted this. Made you happy. That’s all that matters.”

He slid his hand up to her neck, his fingers closing on her jaw, his arm pressing down on her chest, hugging her to him more tightly as his mouth latched onto her shoulder.

“I never got it—this obsession people had with being somebody’s.” His hand trailed down now, firm and steady against her body, no bashfulness, no anxiety left in his movements. “Never wanted it…” His nose nuzzled into her skin as he moved his lips back to her ear, brushing against her as Beth shivered again when he whispered right into her ear: “Until I met you.”

“Yeah?” Beth asked, breathless, and he grunted.

“Yeah. All I want now’s to be good to ya.”

To be yours, Daryl didn’t say, but Beth heard it all the same.

“You really told her all that?” Beth asked, amazed. Daryl Dixon, the man who hated all romantic, lovey-dovey stuff while somehow pulling the most romantic stuff she’d ever seen in real life. What an amazing turn of events.

“Some of it and not like that but yeah. Must’ve hit my head pretty hard when that bullet got me. Good thing Merle wasn’t around to hear me—wouldn’t let me live that down,” Daryl murmured back, and Beth giggled at the thought, then arched her back when Daryl’s hand slid down and in between her legs. He dragged his fingers through the soft side of her thighs, his fingers skimming around her pussy, not quite touching her there yet.

“You’re such a tease, Daryl,” Beth mumbled when he brought his hand back to her tummy, his fingers gliding through the soft expanse of her skin.

“You strolled through our clearing in skimpy shorts and revealing tops for over a month, and I’m the tease here?” Daryl pinched her side, and Beth jumped lightly with a squeak, pushing his hand away. “Like I don’t know what you were doin’, girl.”

“Oh, but you didn’t seem bothered by it at all!” Beth laughed. “Got me thinking you weren’t interested!”

"Yeah, had to think of some real messed-up shit just to act normal."

Beth snorted a laugh again, warmth spreading through her when she felt him smiling against her skin too.

How could anyone think it was wrong for them to be like this when it felt so good? So right? How could it be bad when it made both of them so happy? Beth felt a pang of sadness at the thought of that—of her parents not seeing their relationship for what it was.

“I thought you’d come to see me after leaving the hospital.” Her words left her unbidden, the atmosphere in the room shifting with them. “If Maggie didn’t come here, if she didn’t take me to ya…” Beth shook her head. “Why didn’t you come?”

Daryl sighed heavily, leaving a wet kiss on her shoulder before resting his forehead on her back, forcing a quiet:

“I did.”

Beth gasped.

“You weren’t there, I don’t think, but your father... took a shotgun out, told me if I ever set foot on his grounds again he wouldn’t fire no warnin’ shots.”

“Oh. Did you… did you try explainin’?”

Daryl snorted.

“Your dad wasn’t really in a listenin’ kinda mood. He looks at me and only sees an old, dirty redneck asshole who took advantage of his daughter. Can’t say I blame him.”

“Stop.” Beth turned her head, her shoulder pressing into his torso as she searched for his eyes in the darkness. “If anything, you’re an older, handsome, badass biker with a kind heart and criminally sexy arms who’s in a loving relationship with his daughter. And that’s the only way to see it.”

She reached out for him then, her fingers stroking his chin, burying into the scruff on his face as she leaned in to steal a soft kiss.

“Criminally sexy arms, huh?” Daryl teased, his arm sneaking up to hold her around her chest, his muscles working under his skin as he pressed her into himself more snugly, his lips catching on the corner of her mouth and descending lower to her jaw.

“Among other things,” Beth whispered back, gulping when he glided his arm even higher and around her throat gently, almost questioningly. He wasn’t squeezing her throat, just keeping his hand securely around her, and it felt, against all reason, safe—just like the other things he did to her.

Beth grabbed onto his arm, pressing her backside into him in response, a soft moan erupting from her at the feel of his erection pressing between her legs. It felt almost accidental, the way he slid there, but there was nothing accidental about the pressure that Daryl added next, sliding himself forth and back over her clit and making them both groan. She was already wet, ready for him basically since the moment she woke up in his embrace. It felt different though, having him there with no barriers between them, skin on skin, and Beth couldn’t help but push back with a groan, gasping breathlessly when his tip grazed her entrance.

Daryl’s warm lips trailed along her neck, each kiss lingering and wet, igniting her senses as he nibbled gently at the sensitive curve where her neck met her shoulder. The soft scrape of his teeth and the heat of his breath made her pulse race, and she felt herself unraveling under his touch, losing herself to him all over again.

“Daryl, please…,” she whimpered and gulped unhappily when Daryl moved away instead of inside her, reaching to his nightstand and pulling another rubber out. Beth blushed at the wave of disappointment that went through her at the sight. She realized with sudden clarity that she wanted him to just slip into her without anything, let her feel him like this, fill her in an entirely different way, and even thinking about it made her mouth wet.

Beth turned around to him, and their eyes met just as he closed his teeth around the plastic foil of another condom, short of ripping it open. Her look made him stop though, and as Daryl gazed at her, he slowly pulled the rubber out of his mouth without opening it.

“What?” she asked, watching as he dropped it on the covers and closed the distance between them instead.

Daryl kissed her, slothing their bodies together again, then rasped, “C’mere,” pulling her on top of himself, manhandling her the way she dreamed of for months with no end. “Lemme eat ya first.”

Beth spluttered at the idea, the position feeling way too revealing as he hauled her higher and past his shoulders. It felt too intimate for just a second or two before she felt his hot tongue prodding at her entrance and forgot about all her insecurities.

Beth shivered as his hands gripped her hips firmly, pulling her down until she was fully within his reach. The first swipe of his tongue against her made her gasp, her fingers latching onto the metal bars of the bed as he continued, his touch both tender and insistent. Daryl’s hands moved to her thighs, holding her steady, his gaze meeting hers for a split second, dark and intent, before he returned to his task with renewed fervor.

“Daryl, oh my God, that’s… Oh.”

Each movement, each kiss and flick of his tongue, was bringing her closer to the edge, the intensity of his ministrations almost too much for her. She tried to stifle a whimper, and it made him tighten his grip on her, his low hum sending waves of pleasure through her that made her feel like she was coming undone already. Her initial hesitations dissolved completely, replaced by pure sensation, her head falling back as he worked her with not much of a skill but with focus and determination that made her dizzy, until all she could do was hold onto him, letting the waves of pleasure pull her under completely.

“Daryl, oh, please, please, Daryl,” Beth whispered, turning his name into a plea again, her voice shaky and breathless as she clutched at his shoulders, her fingers digging in as if to anchor herself.

The broken cries she let out seemed to fuel him, his grip tightening on her hips as he pulled her even closer, pressing her down to meet each movement, savoring every shiver and tremble that ran through her. Her head fell back, and her hands found his hair, her fingers tangling in it, her body arching as he brought her to a peak of sensation, her orgasm hitting her almost unexpectedly.

Beth whimpered when she looked down to see her cum hit his open lips as he moved slightly away to look at the state of her. It made his breath hitch, and he darted right back, licking into her again before she could apologize. She didn’t even know she could do that. Beth could swear each time she thought she found the highs of pleasure, Daryl proved her wrong, bringing her even more of it, finding even more intense ways of bringing her to her orgasm.

She was still coming down from that last one, where she dropped on the pillows when Daryl rasped, his hands urging her to move:

“Why don't ya turn back to your side, hm?”

She did, whimpering from overstimulation, her clit still pulsing after the intense orgasm, only moving because he was guiding her again, positioning her with her ass pushed back into him.

There was no pang of pain as he drove himself home this time, his hard dick sliding into her heat more easily than before. She felt his chest pressed against her back, solid and warm, his strong arm wrapping around her waist to hold her close. His control over her was gentle but unmistakable, and she couldn’t help the thrill that ran through her at being held like this—guided, completely enveloped by him.

“Good girl,” he murmured, his voice low and rough in her ear as he moved inside her, slow and deep, every thrust sending a fresh surge of heat through her.

Beth’s mind went hazy, lost in the feel of him. His other hand trailed along her body, fingers grazing her thigh, moving up her stomach, and resting just below her chest before he pulled her even closer, his hold on her both possessive and tender.

“Yeah, your good girl,” she whispered back, pulling an appreciative groan out of him.

“Hell,” Daryl shivered around her. “You are, ain’t you?”

Daryl swallowed hard, his voice breaking slightly as he rasped, still so heartbreakingly unsure:

“All mine?”

“Yes, yours,” she was mumbling back, barely even aware of her own words. “All yours. Please.”

She was completely captivated by him, the way his body felt pressed into her, every ridge and muscle grounding her in him. But before she could fully sink into the feeling, Daryl’s hands moved, firm and purposeful, one gripping her waist while the other wrapped around her shoulder, guiding her as he shifted them both. In one smooth motion, he had her on her stomach beneath him, her body completely at his mercy, and she couldn’t hold back the shiver that ran through her.

"Okay?" he mumbled into her skin and Beth could only nod and whimper in response. His chest covered her back, warm and solid, and she felt every beat of his heart, every labored breath, as he leaned down, brushing his lips along the nape of her neck.

“Beth,” he rasped against her skin as she backed herself right back into him on his next move to show him just how okay with it she really was, the word followed by a deep, raw groan.

His hand slid down her back, possessively, like he couldn’t bear not to touch every inch of her, and she felt him surrounding her, pinning her firmly beneath him. He set a deliberate pace, each thrust bringing a quiet, reverent groan from him that only stoked her desire further. She moaned, the sound muffled against the pillow, unable to resist arching her hips into him more and more with every passing second, chasing the pleasure.

As his hand trailed lower, brushing over her hip and moving between her legs, Beth’s breath hitched, her body sensitive and eager under his touch. His fingers found her clit, moving in slow, teasing circles that sent jolts of pleasure through her, and she couldn’t hold back the moan that slipped from her lips. Daryl groaned right along with her, his face buried against her shoulder as he whispered, “Love hearin’ you like that.” His voice was husky, laced with a raw need that seemed to mirror her own, and each sound he made only pushed her closer to the edge. She tried mumbling back, a quiet you too escaping her and making Daryl grunt above her.

“Tried tellin’ myself I didn’t want to,” he murmured again, his voice barely above a whisper, mumbled and slightly off as if he couldn’t really control what left his mouth anymore. He didn’t seem to be really speaking to her either, too quiet for it to be purposeful. “But when I saw ya in that damn towel at Rick’s…”

Beth moaned, the memory hittin’ her hard—how his eyes had raked over her in the hall, slow and heavy, like he couldn’t help himself. The way he’d looked at her lit a fire in her belly all over again.

“Look at’cha,” he rasped, voice thick with heat as if he too was recalling that night. “All wet… ready for me.”

“Yes… oh God, Daryl, yes,” Beth breathed, her body burnin’, barely hangin’ onto his words through the haze of need.

“Wanted to rip it off ya so bad,” he growled, his grip tightening on her.

“You should’ve, Daryl, I’d let ya…” Beth whimpered, her voice breaking from emotion, the words leaving her in a rush, falling from her mouth before her brain could process what she was saying. “Anythin’," she choked on the words. "Anythin' you wanted.”

Her words made Daryl moan, and he started pounding into her faster, his hand working her gently but insistently as his mouth slid along her neck, leaving a trail of heated kisses that made her feel completely adored, completely claimed. She could feel his breath, hot and heavy against her skin, and every time she moaned his name, he’d let out a low, rough sound that told her he was just as lost in her as she was in him.

“Daryl, please…” she whimpered, not knowing what it was that she was asking of him, their closeness, even with him buried deep inside her, not enough. Still not enough.

His body, his hands, his voice—all of it surrounded her, pulling her deeper into him, making her forget everything but the way he felt moving over her, guiding her toward release with a steady, unrelenting rhythm, his cock thrusting deeper inside her with every movement of his hips.

Daryl’s hand tightened on her waist, his other sliding up her side, rough but careful, pulling her closer. He let out a low, ragged groan, his face pressed against her neck, his breath tickling her skin. Beth felt the desire pooling inside her, making her moan as she tilted her head to the side, giving Daryl more access to her neck. Daryl took full advantage, kissing and nibbling at her skin feverishly as he pounded into her.

“C’mere,” he muttered, pulling out of her abruptly, his hands rough but sure as he guided her to turn. She obeyed, her cheeks flushed, heart racing as he moved her on top of him again. His voice was low and gravelly, thick with need. “Wanna watch ya.”

“Yes, okay, anythin’,” she breathed out again, lowering herself on his cock, savoring the feeling of his hands grasping at her thighs.

They both groaned shamelessly as he slid right back into her heat, the new angle making it somehow even better. Her chest heaving and desire churning, she started slowly thrusting herself into him, her eyes taking him all in. Flushed, chest heaving, muscles tightening from strain. He was biting his lip, watching her right back, his eyes full of heat, and Beth couldn’t help but whimper at the sight.

“Darn, you’re so hot," she mumbled and Daryl let out a soft sound when a second later she leaned down slightly. Beth's hands glided through Daryl's chest, grasping at his shoulders just as Daryl gently cradled her face in his hand, bringing their lips together for another deep, filthy kiss.

Beth clung to him, utterly wrapped in his presence, her voice breaking on a moan when he started moving his hips along with hers, thrusting right back into her, his hands pressing her into him more snugly.

“Oh, holy shit, Daryl, yes, just like that,” she pleaded, and every time she moaned his name, he responded with that sweet little whimper of his, as if he was still struggling to believe she was this into it, this into him.

“Daryl, please…”

The words left her lips in a gasp as he pulled her impossibly close, his hand tangling in her hair as he kissed into her mouth, his tongue hot against hers.

“Oh hell, so wet for me, darlin’,” he murmured, his breaths growing ragged and desperate. “So tight…”

His hand slid down to hold her breast, playing with her nipples as his heated gaze swiped through her body on top of him again. Beth felt a rush of heat spread through her at the term of endearment, the sensation of him gripping her so tightly, filling her so well, pushing her toward the edge. She could feel her body tightening around him, every nerve ending alive and buzzing as their hips snapped together, the rhythm going off the rails.

“Daryl, I—” she gasped, her voice trembling as waves of pleasure washed over her. The urgency in her tone only fueled him, and he thrust up into her deeper, harder, sending shockwaves of ecstasy coursing through them both as she stilled on top of him, the pleasure overtaking her completely. His movements faltered at the sight of her, and with one last thrust, he groaned her name like a prayer, his body shuddering as he came inside her.

“Beth…”

The world around them faded away, leaving only the sound of their shared breaths and the overwhelming bliss that enveloped them in that moment. She stayed on top of him for a moment longer, pressing her hot face into the crook of his neck as they both tried to get their breathing under control.

“Jesus Christ,” Daryl muttered, his voice rough and cracking, like the words had scraped their way out. “I’ve never had sex before.”

Beth giggled, the ridiculousness of the statement hitting her. She knew it wasn’t true, but she played into it anyway.

“How so?” she teased, leaning back slightly to look at him.

But when he looked back at her, his eyes were steady, warm, and serious. Her breath caught as the realization hit—he wasn’t joking.

He swallowed hard, his Adam’s apple bobbing as he struggled for words. Finally, his voice dropped to a low murmur, almost too quiet to hear.

“Ain’t never felt nothin’ like this.”

A quiet ‘oh’ escaped her, and she leaned in to kiss him, the idea that she gave him something he’s never felt before, just like he did her, pushing tears of joy into her eyes. She didn’t want him to think something was wrong though, so she kissed him slowly, prolonging the inevitable. She could still feel his cock pulsating inside her, the feeling making her twitch again, heat uncoiling inside her at the thought of everything they did that night. Daryl let her have this for another moment before pulling out of her gently and extracting himself from her, making her slide to her side in the process. She groaned unhappily when he moved away, and Daryl snorted.

“Just hang on, girl,” he murmured, humor in his voice, as he discarded the condom and swiftly moved back into her embrace. She pushed her head into his chest, her arm coming up to embrace him around his back, hand pushing into his shoulder blades to get him to move closer. Daryl brought his hand to her hip, then slid it back to her ass, his leg pushing in between hers as he snuggled her just as desperately.

Beth was on the verge of falling asleep again when Daryl spoke, a hushed, throaty “‘m sorry” rumbling out of his mouth and straight into her ear. They were still lying on their sides, her face pressed into the crook of his neck, arms and legs entwined, with his head resting on top of hers, and the world around them could kindly fuck off, for Beth Greene was never leaving Daryl Dixon’s arms again. Not if she had something to say about it, at the very least.

“For what?” she whispered back, surprised, but not enough to move from that perfectly sweet spot she found for herself in his arms. Breathing him in, praying for the time to stop again, even as the first rays of sunshine hit Daryl’s windows unrelentingly.

“I-uh, said all that creepy stuff about pullin’ that towel off ya. I wouldn’t…” he stopped when Beth started laughing. “What? What’s so damn funny?”

“Daryl,” Beth left a kiss on his collarbone before moving back slightly, only enough to be able to find his eyes. “I wasn’t lying, you know? When I said I would’ve let you.”

“Stop.”

“No, no, I think… I think you need to hear this, because I don’t think you understand.” She couldn’t keep herself from smiling as she said, looking right into his eyes, “Daryl, I've wanted you since that first night I spent at your place.”

Daryl froze, looking at her incredulously for a few moments before mumbling a weak:

“Don’t joke like that.”

He shook his head at her.

“Ain’t joking, I promise,” she said, blushing a little as she remembered herself feeling weirdly turned on when he said his pants wouldn’t stay on her anyway, as if he was intending to pull them off her. She didn’t know back then, didn’t understand that what she felt in that moment was desire for him to do just that. To touch her. But now, looking back at it, it was obvious. In all honesty, she was attracted to him since that first night in the woods, when they found Sophia. “I couldn’t quite tell what I was feeling at first, only knew I had a really strong crush on you, but that night at Rick’s? I was basically daydreaming about you putting your hands on me while you were having a massive breakdown. And who’s creepy now, huh?”

Daryl snorted, his hand tangling in her hair, pulling playfully on her ponytail as she giggled at him.

“You couldn’t pull off bein’ creepy even if you wanted,” he said with an air of finality to it, and Beth smiled sweetly at him.

“Right back at you, Mr. Dixon,” she said, and Daryl shook his head at her but didn’t try convincing her otherwise anymore.

The sun was coming up outside, and that meant their sleepover was coming to an end. Daryl must’ve noticed that too, because when he kissed her this time, it was soft and lingering, as if he wanted to imprint the moment in both their memories. Beth melted into it, savoring every second, wishing it could last forever, and regretting the days lost. They could’ve shared a beautiful last week of summer if it wasn’t for those two awful men. Beth didn’t want to think about them now, though. She was doing so good, not letting her brain enter those memories the past few hours. She shook her head, making herself focus on now instead.

“What are you doin’ this weekend?” she asked him, nuzzling into his nose happily.

“You,” came a quick answer, and it seemed to surprise Daryl too, because he added, his eyes darting away like he was upset with himself for saying that out loud: "Maybe, if you... If that's.."

Beth couldn’t help but giggle again, her eyes finding his. Whatever he saw on her face made him stop, the hesitant, insecure words dying on his tongue. She smiled when he cleared his throat and added, trying hard to change the subject, “Had this dumb plan... was gonna take ya out back’a my truck, look at the stars or somethin’. Got some blankets an’ all.”

Oh my God, she couldn’t believe what she was hearing. Stargazing? At the back of his truck? That sounded… so romantic. So unlike anything she thought he’d ever want.

“We could still do that. If... ya ain’t busy or nothin,” Daryl muttered, sounding unsure of himself again, and it made her heart squeeze painfully. Beth hoped he would stop doubting himself in time. She would make him realize there was nothing to be ashamed of, not with her.

“Oh, that’s… so lovely! Yeah, I’d love to.” Beth kissed him, a chaste little thing, before adding excitedly, “I had some other ideas too, you know? I started makin’ this list after one of our trainin’ sessions. We were talkin’ about the things we’ve never got to do, and I-uh, I thought I’d make a list of it in my diary.”

“What for?” His eyebrows furrowed as he gazed at her curiously, and Beth blushed under his eyes. Was it a schoolgirl kind of behavior that she should refrain from sharing with him? Would he judge her for being a stupid teenager? She pushed through, deciding that she too needed to stop with all these insecurities. It was Daryl, after all, and he’d never ridiculed her when it mattered. She doubted he would start now.

“I don’t know, really. I thought it was nice, havin’ all these things written down. And you know, I’ve been fillin’ it out since, so there’s quite a lot of it now. Maybe that’s silly, but I was thinkin’ that we could start crossin’ them out together. The way we did with the Fair, the movie night, crossbow shootin’… and now with sex.”

Daryl watched her for a moment longer, his eyes full of unspoken emotion. He shook his head at her a little, as if he didn’t quite understand or believe that she would want to do all that with him. That this was his life now. He didn’t seem like he was regrettin’ it though, so Beth smiled at him brightly, joy spreadin’ through her chest at the idea of sharin’ her life with him.

“Nothin’ silly about that,” he told her finally, gazin’ at her carefully before adding with a little quirk of his lip, “How 'bout I swing by after your classes tomorrow? Grab somethin’ to eat. You can show me that list then, if ya feel like it.”

“Can’t wait till the weekend to see me, huh?” Beth teased him, but her face hurt from how hard she was smiling at him. “You’ve got yourself a deal.”

Half an hour later, Beth stepped into Daryl’s arms again, her hands sneakin’ up and around his neck as she stood on her tiptoes and brought their lips together. Even after the night of explorin’ their bodies, Daryl still kissed her like a man starvin’, deep and searin’, desperate even.

“I hate goodbyes,” she murmured against his lips.

“Yeah, me too,” he rasped back, and Beth smiled at him.

“But it ain’t really a goodbye, right? We’ll be seein’ each other,” she said, and when Daryl nodded, she leaned in for another kiss.

Maggie was already waiting for her on the driveway, but Beth knew she wouldn’t judge her for lingering at the door, all too blissed out, sore, and tired in the best way possible to move faster. She didn’t want to leave, and as she turned out to do so, her hand squeezing his one last time before letting go, Beth found herself hoping he would pull her back.

And Daryl, as if reading her mind, did.

Beth squealed happily as he embraced her again, his lips finding hers and sharing another heart-warming, disgustingly sweet kiss. He nuzzled his nose into hers after, his eyes locking onto her and the corner of his mouth flicking up in a half-smile.

“Love ya,” he murmured quietly, and Beth couldn’t help but let out a joyful laugh.

“I love you too,” she told him once more, marveling at how those words still sent a thrill up her spine even after she had already uttered them a few times.

Beth could feel his eyes on her as she strutted to the car, a new bouncy confidence in her step. The morning sun kissed her skin, highlighting the playful sway of her hips and the glimmer of excitement in her eyes. When she reached the car, she turned to wave at him, her heart soaring at the sight of him, leaning against the doorframe with arms and legs crossed, watching her with the most adorable half-smile she’d seen him wear. Beth knew she looked just as lovestruck as she took her seat next to Maggie, her eyes still glued to him.

“So, I take it all went well?” Maggie asked, a playful note in her voice, and Beth sighed happily.

“I’m going to marry him one day, Maggie,” she breathed out, surprised by her own words, yet they rang true as soon as she said them.

A quiet certainty settled deep in her bones. Daryl was it for her—she knew it now. And maybe, without fully understanding it back then, some part of her had known it from the first moment she laid her eyes on him.

Maggie’s laughter pulled her out of her head.

“Wow, after one night? Damn! He must be good.”

Beth blushed but laughed with her sister, giddiness warming her up from inside.

“Oh, he is. So, so good, Maggie. It was…” She caught herself, too many words coming to her head all at once. There was no way to describe it all, was there? “I didn’t think it could be like that, you know?”

Beth sighed again, looking outside the window and onto Dixon’s driveway they were leaving behind. She thought she’d like to gush about it the way other girls always were, but she found herself a bit too protective of this thing between them to share details of it with anybody. Not even with Maggie. She had to ask though, curiosity eating at her.

“Does it always feel so… intense? Consuming?”

“With some people. Sometimes, yeah,” Maggie admitted. “But you want to know something? It never felt that good with anyone for me, not the way it feels with Glenn. And I think, if you love someone, it’s simply always better, more…”

Maggie shook her head, trying to find the right word, and Beth supplied quietly:

“Magical?”

“Yeah, you could say that.” Maggie gazed at her for a second or two before turning to the road again. “Were you safe?”

Beth blushed furiously at the words.

“Jeez, Maggs, yeah, we were, just, can you not?”

Maggie snorted at her bashfulness.

“Sorry, just makin’ sure, for my own sanity, okay? I don’t think I’d survive our parents’ wrath if I had a hand in getting you pregnant…”

“Maggie!” Beth grumbled, covering her face with her hands, though she couldn’t hide the smile tugging at her lips. “I think I can prevent that from happening without your input, thanks.”

“Whatever you say, sis.” Maggie laughed, giving her a teasing nudge as they rolled down the quiet, early-morning road. “So I guess I’ll have to keep covering for you in front of Mom and Dad while you go on your ‘study sessions’ with that boyfriend of yours, huh?”

“Would you really do that?”

Maggie shrugged.

“The way I see it, I’m already an accomplice. I just hope he’s not gonna hurt you or I’ll have to make good on my threats and run him over with my car.”

“You threatened him? Why am I only hearing about it now?”

“Oh, so he didn’t rat me out? Good, he’s earning some real points with me right now. I like that.” Beth snorted, and Maggie glanced at her again. A moment later, the car filled with their joined laughter, both girls in giddy moods, in love with their partners, and happy to have each other in their lives.

Beth wished she could share her love and happiness with her whole family, but the way their father looked at them upon seeing them return told her there was a long road ahead of her before that could be the case. Maggie convinced their dad that Beth went to the community pool with her to get the last swim of the summer in, and even suspicious, Hershel couldn’t question her when she pulled two bags with towels and wet swimsuits out of the back of the truck. Beth watched Maggie in awe as she pulled her behind herself, all confident and smiley, having perfected the art of lying in a way Beth never could. Hershel didn’t seem like he believed them completely, but he had no evidence saying otherwise, so he let it go, either not noticing Beth’s attire or mistaking it for her normal clothes.

Even though it seemed pointless, Beth tried convincing her dad one more time before leaving for college. He came to her room to see if she was ready to go and take some of her bags downstairs. Hershel was on his way out the door when Beth spoke, doing all she could to sound calm:

“Dad?” Hershel turned to her, and their eyes met. “Why are you so against Daryl, really? I mean, you and Mom… you have this huge age gap between you too.” Hershel opened his mouth to cut in, but Beth didn’t let him. “And you know his father was just like yours. But Daryl got out. You know better than anyone how hard that is, but he did, he made a life for himself.”

“Did he?” her father cut in. “Did he really get out, or is this something you simply want to believe, Bethy?”

“He did. You know he did. He’s a good man, you said it yourself,” Beth argued right back. “Why can’t you just give him a chance?”

Hershel sighed, clearly just as tired by their constant fighting as she was. He looked sad too when he answered her, his voice just as quiet as hers:

“I can,” was the first thing that left Hershel’s mouth, and Beth’s heart jumped in her chest, hope blooming for a second before her dad continued. “I can give him a chance at proving himself when it comes to his character and work ethic. I can trust him with my farm, with my truck, and with many other things that I would never trust his or my father with.”

Beth felt her guts twist. She knew there was a ‘but’ coming, that in a second her father would tell her that he could not trust Daryl with her for some stupid reason, but being prepared for it didn’t ease the pain she felt listening to his next words.

“But because I know what demons and traumas a man has to fight, coming from a family like that, and because I know that some things you just cannot outrun, no matter how you try, I can’t trust him with my most precious treasure. No, not with you. You’re my heart, Bethy, and I love your mom just as much as I do you and your sibling, but I would never want for any of you to go through the things she did because of me. I want and pray for a better life for you. The best kind of life. And Daryl…” Hershel shook his head, watching her with one of the most heartbreaking expressions she’d ever seen on him. “Daryl can’t offer you that.”

“You’re…” wrong, Beth wanted to say, but Dad didn’t let her finish.

“You think you love him, maybe that you can change him, make his life better, but the truth is, Bethy, you don’t know how real life looks like.”

Beth opened her mouth to argue. She didn’t want to change Daryl, and she didn’t think she loved him, didn’t think she could make his life better. She knew it. Her dad just didn’t get them. Didn’t understand. But he didn’t let her speak this time either, and as he spoke, Beth was overcome with disappointment yet again.

“You haven’t experienced all the hardships of adulthood yet, and you might think it’s easy. Being with someone like Daryl. But it’s not. Not in the long run.” It doesn’t have to be easy, she wanted to say, and it’s unfair of you to decide this for me anyway. But Hershel seemed too set in his opinion on this. Was it even worth it to argue? “And that’s why you’re too young to make this decision. Not because of the years between you, but because you have long years ahead of you before you can understand what I’m even talking about here.”

Hershel sighed, seeing her scrunch her eyebrows, her face all hard lines and stubbornness. She didn’t say anything, but it looked like her dad was able to read her silent defiance from her face all the same. “Look, I did everything I could to protect you from the kind of life Daryl is living, Bethy, and I’m not letting you throw all this work away just because of some silly crush.”

“It’s not a crush, Dad. I…”

“You love him. Yes. I’ve heard you the first hundred times you’ve said that.” I wouldn’t have to repeat myself if you just listened, Beth thought, but didn’t voice this either. “I know you believe that now, honey. But the truth is, Daryl took advantage of your sympathy, whether he did it knowingly or not…”

“That’s bullshit,” Beth couldn’t stay silent anymore. “Daryl didn’t…”

“Stop. Just stop, Bethy,” Hershel cut her off suddenly. “You wanted me to tell you why I won’t give Daryl a chance, and I did. It’s not because I believe him to be a bad man. He doesn’t have the best reputation, but he did save your life, and for that, I’ll be forever grateful…”

“You have a funny way of showing that, Dad,” Beth snapped, then blushed and cast her eyes down, realizing that she almost admitted to knowing that Dad threw Daryl out of their land. To knowing how he reacted to Daryl coming here. Even though she wasn’t supposed to know. Her dad, thankfully, didn’t notice the slip-up.

He just continued:

“But you were still just seventeen when you met him, and that changes things too. I met your mother when we were both adults of age, when she could make an informed decision, based on her life experiences and what she saw of me during therapy, to be with me, and I know I didn’t deserve her either. But I kept working on myself. And maybe one day she’ll talk to you about it, about why exactly we don’t want the same or possibly even worse for you.”

Beth only shook her head, well aware that she’d lost this battle. There was nothing she could say that would change Hershel’s mind. Perhaps if he would get to know Daryl the way she did, things could be different. But for now, Beth didn’t see a way out of this.

“Daryl can only hurt you in the end. One day you’ll realize that. For now, you just have to know that we’re doing this because we love you. Very much.”

That was it then. They might have ceased fire, but the war was still very much on, and Beth was on the losing side, it seemed, so she didn’t fight Dad anymore that day. Because what would be the point? Maybe all they needed was time. Maybe one day, she and Daryl could come to her parents and try talking to them again. Fight another battle. She had to let it go for now, but they would be okay, Beth thought.

Daryl and she spent some time sneaking around, meeting behind everyone’s back already, and they could keep doing that for a little longer. It was breaking her heart that she had to keep deceiving her parents, but there was no other way around it for now. And when, a day later, Beth left her classes to find Daryl Dixon leaning against his bike in front of her campus—his hair mussed like he’d just run his fingers through it, sunglasses hiding those sharp blue eyes, a cigarette dangling lazily from his lips, and arms crossed over his broad chest—she decided it was all worth it.

“The hell took you so long?” he grumbled when she was just a few steps away from him, a grimace crossing his face.

Beth smiled at him sweetly in response, hoping to soothe his nerves with affection. She knew it must have been hard for him: waiting for her like that, out in the open where everyone could see him. It was making her feel jittery as well, and knowing Daryl, he felt twice as bad about this. Especially after all the judgment he had to endure from her folks and the rest of the town upon her going missing. They would have to talk about it all at some point, Beth knew, but the wound was still fresh, and it was so easy to talk herself into forgetting all about it instead.

“Had to run to the bathroom real quick, make sure I looked all nice and cute for my boyfriend,” she teased him, closing the remaining distance between them just as he pushed the glasses up on his head and revealed those striking blue eyes to her.

Daryl shot a quick look to both sides, scanning the crowd around them as Beth threw her hands around his neck. Whatever he saw didn’t make him any less nervous as he looked down at her, but it didn’t stop him from circling her waist and hugging her back.

“Real quick, huh?” he muttered around his cig, still grumpy, but his lips stretched to a half-smile when she took the cigarette out of his mouth, dropped it to the ground, and then pulled him in for a kiss with a hand on his neck. A sweet, but short peck to not make him any more uncomfortable than he already was. It was nowhere near what Beth really wanted their kiss to be, but she drew back anyway and near darn melted at the sight of his warm eyes scanning her face, then dropping down to her lips.

She was fully aware of the fact that she wasn’t quick at all. Got chatted up by some guy from her class, then she really ran to the bathroom to check herself in the mirror, and it was only her luck that her mom called her then to ask if she’s sure she can’t come home for the weekend because apparently her aunt was going to visit, and she really wanted to see Beth. She didn’t let up until Beth promised to be there. And there went her weekend plans with Daryl.

Beth opened her mouth to tell him all that, only she didn’t get to, because Daryl dipped his head down, his cheeks coloring slightly as he caught her lips in another kiss. This one wasn’t short or sweet, and Beth whimpered both in surprise and pleasure when Daryl tangled his fingers in her hair and pushed his tongue in her mouth almost forcefully, desperate to taste her. He was almost bending her backward with how hard he was kissing her, and if they didn’t attract many looks before, she was sure they did now. The thought of it, both freeing and hot, made something uncoil in her gut, a wave of desire surging through her, accompanied by a sudden rush of excitement. It was one thing for Daryl to kiss her openly in front of her sibling, overwhelmed with all the emotions their reunion brought, but doing it at her campus in front of countless strangers and without any reason other than he wanted to? That was something.

“Wasted time. You always look nice,” he murmured against her skin upon pulling away, voice low and rough, breath warm on her face. “Now, come on, girlfriend.”

She let out a joyful laugh when Daryl caught her hand and pulled her to his bike with a newfound urgency. As she settled behind him and pushed her hands around his waist, she marveled at how far they’d come since the first time she laid her eyes on him back in the woods. She would’ve never thought they’d end up here.

And the best part was: this was just the beginning.

Beth was fifteen years old when the Dixons came to her town. She was seventeen when she met one of them for the first time and fell irrevocably, deeply in love with him.

At the age of eighteen, Beth didn’t know much about how she’d like her future to look. She had no idea if medical studies were the ones for her, if she really wanted to be a doctor or was just fulfilling her parents’ wishes. She didn’t know if singing was something she’d like to do professionally instead or if it was just a silly hobby she’d never pursue. She thought perhaps she’d like to move out of Georgia entirely, but perhaps she’d never do that. Perhaps she’d go back to the farm after her studies, stay near Dixon’s garage. She couldn’t know how long the list of things she’d never tried (but wanted to) would get and how many positions on that bucket list she would cross out with Daryl by her side, and she had no idea if her parents would ever accept her relationship with Daryl either.

Only hope.

What Beth did know, however, was that she loved Daryl Dixon, and she was ready to jump headfirst into every uncertain, beautiful, and wild moment with him. The rest of the world be damned.

 

THE END

Notes:

The title of the sequel is The Uncertain, the Beautiful, and the Wild. This story started with Beth's POV; the sequel will start with Daryl's. ;) If you wanna guess where we're going from here, please don't hesitate to do that—I’d love to read your ideas, even if I have most of that story already fleshed out in my head from beginning to end. I'd say it's not gonna be as long as this one, but then again, I didn’t really plan for this part to be this long or for it to have a sequel either. xD

If anyone stumbles upon the story after I’ve completed it, know that I'm around and I'll gladly read anything you've got to say about my writing. I love reading people's thoughts on my work and what's happening in the story. I think that was one of my favorite things about publishing this story—seeing how you guys got excited about it and reading your ideas and general feelings towards the characters and events. It's been truly, truly rewarding.

Daryl has been a bit more vocal in the last two chapters—some of you noticed—I hope you didn't mind it. I thought after almost losing Beth, he'd be pressing himself more to tell her stuff, getting things off his chest because he almost didn’t get to say it to her at all, and that knowledge is pushing him to be more open now. To do what he wants to, even though it's hard for him and he struggles. I hope I managed to convey that, but if I didn't, now you know what the reason for it was. ^^

Just like Daryl and Beth said: it ain't really a goodbye (hopefully). But in this case, it's the end of something. This part of the story is done, with or without a sequel. It started out with somewhere near 180k words. Now it's... much, much more than that, and I'm amazed—by you and by myself. Thank you for sticking till the end! Thank you, thank you, thank you for dedicating your time to read this long-ass fic and leave comments on it. I know I'm gonna miss waking up to new comments and reading through your thoughts.

Till next time. <3

Series this work belongs to:

• Part 1 of Dixon's girl