Too young for the strong stuff

by Dark_Vader88

Summary:

Kaladin Stormblessed is the picture of discipline and restraint, but there’s one mystery Bridge Four can’t crack—why does Kaladin drink so little? What they don’t know (and Kaladin is determined they’ll never find out) is that, despite his legendary reputation, he’s only 19 years old and technically not old enough to be drinking most of the alcohol they casually enjoy. But secrets have a way of slipping out, especially when you’re stuck with a bunch of nosy soldiers...

Chapter 1

Kaladin Stormblessed had a secret. Not the "I can wield Stormlight and fly" kind of secret. No, this one was far more embarrassing. The kind of secret that, if it ever got out, would lead to endless teasing from Bridge Four.

It all started one evening in the barracks.

As usual, the group was gathered after a long day of drills, laughs echoing throughout the room. Mugs of ale were being passed around, but as was Kaladin’s custom, he grabbed a small cup of something lighter—barely alcoholic and weak enough to make Teft scoff every time.

“Why do you always drink that stuff?” Lopen asked, squinting at Kaladin’s cup suspiciously. “I mean, c’mon, it’s practically water with attitude!”

“I like the taste,” Kaladin lied, taking a deliberate sip as if to prove his point. The truth? It was the only thing he could get away with drinking without risking everyone finding out the one thing he didn’t want them to know.

“Well, this stuff’ll put hair on your chest, Kal!” Rock boomed, sliding a mug of his own concoction toward him.

“I’m good, Rock,” Kaladin replied, carefully pushing the mug away.

Teft raised an eyebrow. “You never really drink, do you? Makes me wonder if you’re hiding something, lad.”

Adolin, lounging casually on one of the bunks, chuckled. “Kal’s just trying to keep that image of stoic discipline, right? Can’t have the rest of us seeing him drunk and disorderly.”

Kaladin tried to laugh along, but there was a twitch in his eye. This was getting too close for comfort.

Lopen leaned in closer, eyes gleaming mischievously. “Wait… maybe Kaladin doesn’t know how to handle his drink! I bet if he had a few mugs of Rock’s stuff, he’d be singing like a parshman at a festival.”

Kaladin kept his face neutral, but internally he was sweating. They couldn’t find out. If they did, he’d never hear the end of it.

“You know, Kal,” Adolin mused, “I’ve been wondering something for a while. You’ve been with us for years now, fought battles, led men… but I don’t think you’ve ever told us how old you are.”

Tension rippled through Kaladin. He tried to play it off. “I’m old enough.”

“Ohhh no,” Lopen said, grinning like he’d just caught the juiciest gossip. “Now we have to know. How old are you, Stormblessed?”

Kaladin shifted uncomfortably. “I don’t think it matters.”

“It totally matters,” Skar chimed in, leaning forward. “C’mon, how old?”

He could feel their gazes piercing him, waiting. Teft, Sigzil, Skar, even Rock—every eye in the room was on him.

He sighed, realizing there was no escaping it. Maybe if he said it quickly, it wouldn’t register right away.

“I’m… nineteen,” Kaladin muttered, barely above a whisper.

“What was that, lad? Speak up,” Teft said, cupping a hand to his ear.

Kaladin clenched his jaw. He hadn’t survived highstorms and countless battles just to get cornered by his own team like this. “I’m nineteen,” he repeated, louder this time.

The room went dead silent.

Lopen’s mouth dropped open, frozen mid-sip. Skar looked like he’d been struck by lightning. Adolin choked on his drink, sputtering and coughing, while Teft just blinked slowly, trying to process what he’d just heard.

“Nineteen?” Adolin finally croaked out, eyes wide. “As in… one year away from twenty? That nineteen?”

Kaladin nodded, wishing for a convenient storm to blow him out of the room.

“Storms!” Lopen howled with laughter, slapping the table. “We’ve been following orders from a kid who isn’t even old enough to drink properly?”

“I can drink!” Kaladin shot back, defensive. “Just… not the strong stuff.”

“Technically, you shouldn’t be drinking any stuff,” Teft pointed out, his lips twitching as he fought back a grin. “Not legally.”

“Ohhh, this is rich,” Adolin wheezed, still recovering from his choking fit. “Kaladin, the big, tough captain of Bridge Four, isn’t even twenty. You’re practically a teenager!”

Kaladin crossed his arms, glaring. “I’m turning twenty in a week.”

“That doesn’t change the fact that you’re still nineteen,” Skar teased, his serious demeanor cracking under the absurdity of the situation.

“Kaladin,” Lopen said, tears of mirth glistening in his eyes, “you could’ve told us, man! We’d have been gentle. Well, maybe not. But we definitely wouldn’t have let Rock give you his mystery brew!”

“I think that’s exactly why I didn’t tell you,” Kaladin muttered.

Rock stroked his chin thoughtfully. “This explains much. I was wondering why you never enjoyed my drinks. But now I see—you are still a child, eh? No offense, Kaladin.”

Kal groaned, burying his face in his hands. “I’m not a child.”

“No, you’re our child,” Lopen declared, slinging an arm around him. “Our little baby Captain.”

Kaladin shoved him off, standing up abruptly. “I’m done with this.”

Teft grabbed his arm, " Oh no you dont! We-" then stops for a minute and thinks about something then says, " were we technically just offering and smuggling a teenager drinks just now?" he says with a laugh

Chapter 2

Teft grabbed his arm, " Oh no you dont! We-" then stops for a minute and thinks about something then says, " were we technically just offering and smuggling a teenager drinks just now?" he said with a laugh

Kaladin froze mid-step, eyes widening as Teft’s words sank in. He turned around slowly, glaring at the group.

Adolin blinked, looking between Kaladin and Teft before breaking into a mischievous grin. “Oh storms, he’s right! We’ve been enabling underage drinking!”

Lopen gasped dramatically, clutching his chest. “We’re criminals! And here I thought I was just a loveable rogue.”

Kaladin rubbed his temples. “I’m not a child, and I’ve been drinking responsibly.”

“Responsibly?” Skar chimed in, stifling a laugh. “You’re drinking stuff that barely qualifies as alcohol.”

Teft shook his head, still chuckling. “I don’t think that’s the point. If someone found out we’ve been letting Kaladin sip on anything, we’d be in for it. Even if it’s just a thimble’s worth.”

Lopen leaned in with mock seriousness. “Don’t worry, Kal. We’ll protect you. If anyone asks, we’ll say it was apple juice.”

Kaladin let out an exasperated sigh. “This is ridiculous. Im almost 20 in a few months or more anyway! It’s not like I’ve been sneaking off with bottles of wine.”

“That’s what a teenager would say,” Adolin teased, crossing his arms. “You’re technically still a minor by Alethi law, aren’t you?”

Kaladin groaned again. “I am not a minor! And stop saying ‘technically.’”

Adolin waggled his eyebrows. “Technically.”

“Adolin.”

“Technically,” he repeated, grinning.

Kaladin glared, but the rest of Bridge Four had already joined in.

“Technically,” Lopen added, barely containing his laughter.

“Technically, you’re going to regret this,” Kaladin muttered under his breath, though he knew it was too late. The teasing wouldn’t stop anytime soon.

Teft slapped Kaladin on the back. “Cheer up, lad. We’ll make sure you’re properly ‘of age’. Just hold out until then.”

Kaladin rolled his eyes but couldn’t help the small smile creeping onto his face. As annoying as it was, their lighthearted banter was something he couldn’t deny he enjoyed. Even if they were all idiots.

“Fine,” Kaladin sighed, walking toward the door. “But no more drinks until my birthday. And I don’t want any surprises.”

“Oh, we can’t promise that,” Lopen called after him.

“Definitely no promises!” Adolin shouted with a laugh.

Kaladin groaned, knowing they were absolutely going to ignore his wishes.

A storm was brewing—and this time, it wasn’t in the sky

###

Kaladin trudged out of the room, only to be met with a chorus of mock-serious farewells from Bridge Four and Adolin.

“Good luck out there, Captain,” Lopen called, saluting with an exaggerated flourish. “Remember, don’t do anything we wouldn’t do!”

“I’m not making any promises,” Kaladin grumbled, turning down the hallway.

As he walked away, Teft leaned in, whispering loudly to the others, “I bet he’s just going to sulk in his room. Or maybe he’ll try to sneak some real ale and end up passing out in the barracks. Wouldn’t that be a sight?”

“Do you think he knows we’re just messing with him?” Skar asked.

Adolin snorted. “Of course he knows. But it’s more fun to mess with him anyway.”

As Kaladin rounded the corner, he was startled by a loud thud and a high-pitched yowl. Looking up, he saw a cat—Jasnah’s—darting across the hall, its fur standing on end. The cat’s eyes were wide and terrified.

Kaladin blinked in confusion. “What the—”

Just then, Lopen and Adolin came sprinting around the corner, Lopen holding a tin can that rattled ominously.

“Lopen! What did you do?” Kaladin demanded, seeing the can.

“Nothing,” Lopen said innocently. “Just a little prank.”

Adolin chuckled. “We thought it would be funny to see how long it takes you to figure out that you’ve been pranked. And maybe see if the cat reacts.”

Kaladin sighed, rubbing his face with frustration. “You’re all insufferable.”

“Aw, come on,” Lopen said, giving Kaladin a friendly pat on the back. “We’re just trying to cheer you up.”

“Cheer me up? By turning me into an underage drinking criminal and setting off a cat alarm?” Kaladin shook his head. “What’s next? Are you going to start a rumor that I’ve been secretly training squirrels to take over the tower?”

“You know,” Adolin said thoughtfully, “that doesn’t sound like a half-bad idea. But we’d need a better distraction for the squirrels.”

Kaladin rolled his eyes. “I’ll take my chances with the squirrels. At least they won’t try to turn me into a running joke.”

As he turned to leave, he heard a muffled, “Hey, Kaladin!”

Looking back, he saw Teft holding up a small box with a bow on it. “Happy early birthday,” Teft said with a grin. “We figured since you’re almost of age, we’d give you something to celebrate. No alcohol, though, I promise.”

Kaladin hesitated, eyeing the box warily. “What’s in it?”

“Open it and see,” Teft said.

Kaladin carefully unwrapped the box and pulled out a set of “Captain’s Orders” drinking glasses, complete with humorous instructions and a not-so-subtle note saying, “For When You’re Actually Legal.”

Kaladin couldn’t help but laugh despite himself. “You’re all ridiculous.”

“And don’t you forget it!” Lopen shouted as he and the others dispersed, still chuckling.

Kaladin stood there, shaking his head with a grin on his face. As much as he tried to be annoyed, he couldn’t deny that their antics were just what he needed.

He pocketed the glasses and headed for his room, shaking his head and smiling at the absurdity of it all. At least they cared, even if their way of showing it was completely chaotic.

And as for the cats and squirrels? Well, he figured they’d be just as confused as he was about the latest prank war.

Notes:

Just so you know, Kaladin Definately gets carded everytime he goes to a tavern. its hilarious everytime.

Also, Kaladin, cat or dog person? I cant choose one cause both would fit in their own way but i think dog would better suit him. i mean look at those bundle of joys. just make sure Adolin doesnt feel replaced lol