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J the Ultimate Badass

Summary:

This is the INCIDENT that earned J the title of 'Ultimate Badass'.

Chaos breaks loose when J is cleaning the bottom level of the complex. Left to rely on the guidance of a rookie on cams, J fights to survive their shift and get out of this hell hole alive.

Notes:

I started this work over 2 years ago. Then I got to the last chapter and hit such a huge writers block (plus other life events blindsiding me) that I took 2 years off of writing. Now I've managed to whack out the last chapter and so I'm (finally) posting this story. I'll update every day until it's completely posted. Hope you enjoy!

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Chapter Text

Monday, 05/27/2176 08:47:03

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A sudden chill went down J’s spine, their muscles tensing as their previously brisk and purposeful scrubbing slowed to a halt. Their attention turned to scanning the hallway around them carefully, head turning slowly to let them glance up at the vent near the ceiling behind them. Their eyes narrowed as they slowly pivoted on their toes where they were crouching, putting their back to the wall as one hand slid the brush down to silently place it on the ground. Their other hand slowly went to their belt, curling around the dagger they kept hidden behind their radio pocket as they scanned the shadows for movement. 

J was working on Level Z - the lowest, highest security underground level - cleaning up small messes from the delivery of a new shipment that had arrived over the weekend in preparation for the head scientists from other facilities who were arriving for a special meeting that afternoon. As J slowed their breathing and continued scanning the area around them with their eyes, they were now wondering if the alarms had been reset properly or if they were simply suffering from an overdose of paranoia. Pulling the knife free silently, their other hand reached up and slowly pressed down on the STOP button on their Walkman, the slight ‘click’ seeming loud in the sudden silence as the music coming from their headphones abruptly cut off. Jaw clenching, J slowly eased their weight forward before going still, listening carefully.

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Angie and Gus had been at this posting together for almost three years now and were practically a single entity when working the cams at this point. Their managers had periodically attempted to split them up so that they could pair them with less competent camera operators, but each attempt had ended up being complete failures so now, instead of splitting their teamwork up, the managers would send a rookie to work with them for a month or so as a way of training them up. Or, weeding them out, as was more often the case.

“D4.” Gus murmured as he took a sip of his coffee and Angie shifted her attention from scanning the hallway monitors to the view on one of Gus’ screens. Scrunching her nose up at the sight, Angie set down her cup of tea and reached over to tug the clipboard of incident forms towards her. Scooping up her pen, she clicked it on and began jotting down the information.

“You’d think they’d learn by now.” She grumbled back and got a huff of agreement from Gus even as his eyes scanned over the monitors in front of her seat, casually trading jobs without even moving since Angie was faster and more efficient at filling out forms like that.

“Are… are they, uh,” the voice behind them cracked in embarrassment as the rookie shifted behind them. They didn’t even need to look to know that her face was a bright red, shoulders raised around her ears and gripping her notebook to her chest as though she could hide behind it and her huge, round glasses. She cleared her throat, trying to look anywhere but at the free show they were getting on the D4 monitor. “Uh, y-you know?” She finished lamely, making Gus chucked in amusement at the juvenile avoidance and Angie’s lips thin in an attempt not to smirk. 

“They’re fuckin’, rookie.” Gus’s lips pulled back in a dark smirk at the squeak the rookie let out. “You know. Doin’ the horizontal mambo. Takin’ a trip to pound town. Bumpin’ uglies. Churnin’ the butter. Boinkin’. Dippin’-” He was cut off by the rookie literally lunging forward and clapping her hands over his mouth while squeaking out sounds that might have been attempts at words. Angie couldn’t hold back her loud laughter as she leaned back in her seat, the incident form basically complete and just needing Gus’ counter-signature and then to be filed.

“I get it!” The rookie finally managed to squeak out before ripping her hands away from Gus’ face with a cry as he licked her. Angie roared with laughter, clapping her hands on her thighs as she shook her head while Gus grinned.

“You sure? I could think up some more-” He suddenly broke off, grin wiping from his face faster than lightning as he leaned forward to stare at one of the monitors. Angie noticed and was instantly alert, scanning the monitors quickly to figure out what had Gus on alert. She froze, gaze narrowing in on the view from monitor Z12 even as Gus swore quietly and hit a few keys to bring up the Z monitors onto the big screen. The rookie sank back in her chair, swallowing nervously and clutching her suddenly clammy hands as she worried her bottom lip with her teeth, unnerved by the sudden switch from joking and laughing to deadly serious.

“W-what is it?” She whispered, eyes flashing between the monitors on the big screen… but everything seemed… fine? Empty corridors. The elevator was closed and at one of the higher levels. A few scientists leaning over microscopes. More scientists watching something through a window. The janitor crouched in the hallway, holding a knife. More empty corridors. 

Her eyes jumped back to the Z12 monitor, eying the large knife the janitor held with an ease that suggested familiarity. “Where did the janitor get that knife?” She asked quietly, wondering if that was what held their attention, mind already flipping through the forms they would need to fill out to report a stolen weapon or an employee going on a murderous rampage.

“Doesn’t matter where they got it.” Gus muttered, leaning forward and scanning the monitor closely, his words jolting her out of her thoughts about proper forms and report requirements.

“Only matters why J pulled it out in the first place.” Angie finished, scanning the other monitors for that floor, finger hovering over the alarm button, ready to press it at the first sign of a containment breach. The rookie gulped nervously, fingers clutching the notebook tighter as she realized that something might be about to go seriously, horribly wrong and she was unable to do anything but watch the situation unfold on the monitors controlled by Angie and Gus.

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J’s breathing was slow and silent as they remained frozen, eyes scanning the hallway while they listened carefully. Their thighs were starting to burn from how long they had been crouched, the seconds dragging for what felt like minutes, the minutes like hours. As each moment passed without any further hint of something being wrong, J wondered if it had been a fit of paranoia, their imagination running away from themself, their mind playing tricks on them. A whisper of sound made them realize that no, it was unfortunately not a false alarm. Hand tightening around the dagger slightly, they slowly shifted their weight to one side as their head slowly turned.

Instinct had them bursting into action, launching themselves forward and to the side even as they twisted, hands coming up as they slashed the knife diagonally up from their hip. The knife was sharp enough to slice through the leaping facehugger like butter, the spray of acidic blood thankfully following the blade slice and flying to the side as J continued their spin out of the way and towards their cart. The hiss of acid eating through the wall and the knife blade was quickly drowned out by the alarm going off. J didn’t let the alarm distract them as they burst to their feet, arm whipping out and hurling the damaged blade forward down the hall where it embedded into another leaping facehugger, the momentum making the body fall short, legs twitching in death.

“Fuck.” J swore as one hand whipped around to yank the pistol from the back of their belt, firing a trio of shots before they even got the pistol around to the front of their body as they bolted for the cart. Three facehugger bodies fell to the floor behind them, spilling acid across the hallway as J whipped the gun forward, firing twice more. The faint sound of screaming echoed down the hallway from the secured lab as two more facehugger bodies collapsed around the cleaning cart. 

One shot left . J was two steps from the cart when another facehugger leaped at them from behind the buckets beside the cart. J spun out of the way, lashing out with the pistol and using it to launch the facehugger down the hall. Their free hand slapped against the cart, fumbling under the top tray even as they fired the last bullet into the vent in the top of the wall next to them, killing the facehugger that had been about to jump down at them.

Their fingers finally wrapped around another blade even as they pistol-whipped another facehugger away from them, ripping the dagger out from the cart and throwing it into the earlier facehugger that had returned to leap at them, killing it and pinning it to the floor even as the acid began to destroy that blade as well. 

They grit their teeth as they smashed the pistol into another facehugger and the pale flesh split against the gun, a light mist of acid attacking their hand even as they released the ruined pistol and stomped the injured facehugger with their acid-proof boot. Ignoring the pain, they snatched up the acid-proofed fire axe from its holder on the side of the cart and swung at the last returning facehugger, slicing it in half and spraying the hall with more acid. 

Breathing heavily, J held the axe in one hand as they scanned the hallway, reaching for the acid-neutralizer on the cart with their injured hand and - ripping the lid off the large bucket - they dunked their entire hand in. As the seconds passed without another attack, J let out a slow, shaky breath and started paying attention to the alarm.

Alert. This is not a drill. Containment breach on Levels; 8, 9, 10, 13, 14, 17, 24, U, V, W, X, Y, and Z. This is not a drill. Alert. This is not a drill. Chemical fire on Level 12. Follow breach and fire procedures. Repeat: follow breach and fire procedures. This is not a drill.” 

“When it rains, it fucking pours.” J muttered even as they pulled their hand from the acid-neutralizer and wiped the excess liquid off on their hip. Keeping an eye on the shadows, J pulled two more daggers from the cart, securing them on their toolbelt before crouching down and pulling another pistol out from where they had taped it to the bottom of the cart. Tucking the pistol into their belt where the previous one had been hidden, they eyed the now-silent (except the alarm and sound of acid eating the floor) hallway, the screams having been cut off.

The radio headset J was wearing was still silent - something that would have been strange a month ago but was now all-too-common since the new management team had decided that the janitorial staff would be on line 2 instead of line 1 with the guards like they used to be. It was for “ease of contact” or some such bullshit reasoning which J honestly didn’t care about. Using their chin to trigger the radio to pick up their voice, J carefully scanned the hallway as they spoke quietly.

“J to cams.”

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The rookie was gaping at the screens, eyes wide enough to see the whites all the way around and skin pale from watching the scientists being taken down so quickly and pathetically and in such a clear juxtaposition to the competency and will to survive shown by the janitor. She flinched as the rough voice came over the extra radio that had been silent compared to the other radios which were filled with chaos. Gus and Angie were both speaking into headsets connected to line 1 and the main radios, briskly telling different guard teams where to go, hands flying across keyboards as they helped coordinate everyone else. The rookie swallowed hard and nervously reached over to pick up the quiet, forgotten radio, clicking it on to reply.

“This-” She had to clear her throat from the horrible squeak that had come out of her mouth. “This is cams, go ahead, uh, J?” It turned into a question unintentionally and she noticed the janitor shift in the monitor, their head turning to look directly up into the camera, making her blush in embarrassment and nerves.

“... You okay rookie?” The janitor asked calmly, making a hysterical laugh bubble out of her mouth before she slapped a hand over her mouth, breathing harshly through her nose. She watched as the janitor’s mouth jerked up on one side. “Silly question, huh? You’re okay. This can be a bit overwhelming, huh? Is this your first containment breach?” The janitor’s voice was soothingly calm and the gentle questioning was helping her calm down a bit.

“Y-yeah.” The soft chuckle that came over the radio in reply surprisingly helped ease her tension as well.

“You’re doing fantastic then rookie. Last one literally ended up shitting himself and hiding in the corner and it was just a false alarm. So, you are doing just fine. Now, I need your help for a bit, yeah? Can you see me on the cams?” 

“Y-yeah, I see you.” She replied, looking up and grinning slightly at the sight of the janitor waving at the camera.

“Excellent. Now, do you see the hallways around me? Do you see anything moving?”

“I see the hallways.” She replied, eyes flashing over the videos, watching them carefully. “N-nothing moving that I can tell. E-except, uh, o-one of the things you killed is, uh, si-sinking?” Her voice turned into a squeak at the end as she watched the pale spider thing sink deeper into the hole on the floor its blood was creating.

“Yeah, they’ll do that sometimes. Okay, can you see if the elevator is still working? There should be a panel of lights to the left of the screens.” She got out of her chair to step over to the side, looking at a panel of red and green lights with labels next to them. “There should be one labeled ‘elevator’ near the center-right.” 

“I see it, but the light is off?”

“Shoot. Okay, that means the elevator is very, very broken then. Okay, back to the cams please. Look for the L-stairs, Y to Z level. Is it blocked?” She hurried back over to hover behind Gus and Angie’s chairs, peering at the different monitors until she found the one she was looking for. 

“Uh, found it. It looks clear…” She frowned and leaned in closer, peering at the video. “There’s something weird on the railing though.” Angie, who she was leaning over, glanced up at her before looking closer at the feed as well.

“Shit! Tell J there’s some of the bug-goo in there. The other stairs are blocked though - see?” Angie reached out and tapped the monitor showing the R-stairs on the same level and the rookie glanced over and shuddered at the sight of so many of the pale spider things scrambling over the rubble that had once been the stairs.

“I caught that rookie. Gonna take my chances on the L-stairs. Ask Angie or Gus if I have permission to change to the guard channel while I try to escape this hell-hole.”

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J stifled a groan as they stalked over to the closest fire-extinguisher box. Elevator down, stairs fucked a half dozen one way and a living nightmare the other. Guards nowhere close to them based on the lack of echoing gunfire. Hefting the fire axe and feeling the comforting weight of the acid-neutralizer bottles against their thighs, J swung forward and smashed the door off the box. 

Reaching in, they pulled out the extra fire axe, sliding it over their shoulder into a sewn-in holster across their back for it. Once it was secure, they grabbed the two extra knives they had hidden in the sides of the box, slipping them into their hiding places around the utility belt. Finally they ripped a bag down that was taped to the inside of the top of the box, pulling the three clips of ammo out and slipping them into their pocket. 

J started to turn away before pausing and sighing, turning back and reaching in to grab one of the protein bars that they had stashed there, ripping it open and munching on it with one hand while carrying the axe in the other, rolling their steps so they were soundless as they headed towards the L-stairs.

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Back in the cams room, the rookie gaped at the monitor as she watched the janitor eating a snack bar. Angie took a moment to glance up at her and chuckled, making the rookie jump and snap her mouth shut. Angie just nodded and grinned at her.

“Don’t worry about it - you’re still new so you haven’t had a chance to get to see J in ‘ultimate badass mode’. Do us a favor, grab a paper and mark down the type of snack bar if you can and where they grabbed it from - it’ll go to the betting pool.” Angie continued typing away at the computer in front of her as she spoke, eyes flicking over the different screens as they popped on and off the main monitor, following her typed directions.

“O-okay.” The rookie glanced around before picking up their notebook and turning to a new sheet, jotting down the information quickly. “Oh, uh, J asked if they can switch over to the main radio channel?” She asked tentatively and Angie snorted.

“Yeah. Tell J that anytime an alarm goes off, they have permission from us to change over right away. Oh, hey, start jotting down the weapons J uses as well - there’s a new pool about which weapons J is proficient at. That’ll give you something to do while keeping an eye on J.” 

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“Uh, cams to J?” The tentative voice of the rookie returned through the radio, making J pause and back away from the entrance of the stairwell, glancing up at the camera and nodding while clicking the radio on and off twice. There was a long moment of silence until J looked up at the camera again and raised an eyebrow, moving one hand up to put a finger over their lips.

“Oh! Right, sorry. Uh, Angie says you have permission from now on to change to the main radio channel immediately when an alarm goes off. But, uh, it might be chaotic so if you need something specific I’ll, uh, keep this channel on as well?” The voice was even more tentative which made J grin slightly and nod to the camera, shooting it a thumbs-up. Then J reached down and switched to the other channel.

The abrupt riot of sound that filled their headset made J jerk and huff out a breath. It was worse than chaotic, it was a cacophony. Incoherent screaming, ear-drum shattering weapons fire, enraged shouts of orders, swearing, the distant sound of Xenomorphic shrieks, and the overpowering roars of challenge from Yautja overwhelmed J’s hearing for a moment before they switched back to the second channel. Taking a couple more steps back from the stairwell door, J pulled out the pistol, aiming at the vent next to the door before using their chin to click the radio on.

“Listening to that shit is gonna get me killed. So, rookie, you’re gonna have to be my guide for this. Think you can handle it?” 

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The rookie gulped and glanced up at the screens, trying to follow the cams for J as they flashed over the board as Angie and Gus constantly changed the view settings based on where they needed to look for the various guard teams. Gus was speaking constantly into the radio while Angie listened in and changed the monitors continuously, her own eyes sweeping over the array of video feeds and pulling up anything that caught her eye for Gus to see as well.

“Uh, hang on.” She said into the radio before stepping up next to Angie.

“Speak fast, rookie.” Angie muttered, not looking away from what she was doing.

“I need to access the secondary monitors so I can be eyes for J.” She stated, surprised at the sudden calm she felt now that she had something concrete and helpful to do. Angie shot a glance at her before nodding.

“Boot up the secondary terminal and let me know when you’re ready for the code.” The rookie quickly strode over to the back corner of the office, sliding into the dusty chair and booting up the secondary camera system. As the monitors flickered on, she grabbed a headset and hooked it into the radio she had been holding, setting it up on the charging stand to her right so that it wouldn’t die unexpectedly. Fingers gliding over the keys of the terminal, she used her chin to click the radio on.

“I’m getting set up to be your eyes. L-stairs to Y level still appear clear except the bug goo Angie mentioned earlier. I don’t have eyes on Y to X level yet but I will soon.”

“Thanks rookie. Keep breathing and we’ll both get through this, yeah? I’m gonna start heading up, let me know as soon as you know which way I need to head.” 

“Will do.” She nudged the radio off again before calling over her shoulder, “Ready for the code.” Her fingers flew over the keyboard as Angie rattled off the 13 digit code and, moments later, video monitors flooded the screen. Quickly shunting the videos for the above-ground levels off to the smallest side possible, she quickly set up the videos on her smaller monitor so that the main focus was on the lowest levels with the next three levels on standby. She froze for a moment as her breath caught, watching J locked in battle with one of the giant black monsters she had been briefed on.

J had the handle of the fire axe shoved into the bug’s mouth, keeping it pushed away from their body even as the bug gripped the axe in its huge hands and tried to shove back. The tail flashed across the screen, embedding in the concrete stairs behind where J’s head had just been before whipping back as J twisted back into the spot, grimacing darkly. 

The rookie’s heart pounded as she watched as J jerked one foot back, banging their heel against the stair behind them. A flash of metal appeared at their toes as they kicked forward and up, stabbing the knife in their boot into the bug’s side. The bug fell back and J jerked the axe and their foot back, bracing themself as they shifted their grip and swung the axe down like they were splitting wood. The bug’s neck split open, its oblong head bouncing down the steps as the body followed and the rookie gasped, realizing they had been holding their breath as they watched the battle. 

She watched, mouth hanging open, as J glanced around carefully, shaking the acid from the head of their axe and from the knife on their boot before they knocked their heel twice against the step and the knife disappeared back to where it had been hidden. The rookie reached over, dragging the notebook and pen in front of them and jotted down the new weapon into the table she had created for Angie. Even as they wrote, they glanced up at the video feeds to check the next flight of stairs as well as the next level to make sure it was clear for J to escape.

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J forced themself to breathe slowly as they silently climbed the stairs, axe up and ready in their hands. They glanced at the blade and handle of the axe and grimaced. While it had been treated to be protected from acid, the human-made metal needed frequent re-treatment to stay acid-proofed. The treatment process required them to smuggle the axe out for a weekend so their friend could have the time needed to fully protect it before smuggling it back in. 

A treatment process , J reminded themself ruefully, that was due to happen three weeks ago but got pushed off because the jerk was out hunting and then didn’t show up when he said he would .

The blade was starting to show signs of acid damage and there was a section near the top of the handle that was smoking as the acid continued to slowly eat away at the metal. J paused on the landing, eyes searching the stairwell above them as they pulled out one of the acid-neutralizing spray bottles and squirted some of the liquid over the head and handle of the axe, resigning themself to the fact that they would need to abandon the weapon before they got out of there. Reattaching the bottle to their belt, they continued up the stairs silently.

Half a flight down, 29 and a half more to the surface…