Chapter Text
This had to be the worst day of Naoya's beautiful life. Last day of his comfortable lifestyle, and beginning of hell, that he definitely didn't (in his own opinion) deserve.
'No. This makes no sense. No way' he disagreed without much emotion behind it, because the situation was too absurd for his brain to even put up much fight. It had to be one of his father's silly little jokes, like how he kept mentioning writing him out of his will, or blocking his credit card if he won't stop stealing from his alcohol cabinet. No way he seriously wanted his beloved sweet baby boy to go to work?!
'The decision was already made. We can't back out of it' scoffed Naobito as if he wasn't sending his favourite child to war.
'Maybe people who made said decision should all drown in a pond!' he finally raised his voice seeing that his dad was not pranking him.
'Stop whining, it's not like you have anything better to do around here!' shouted back his father 'It's a great opportunity for you to finally do some work! You'll take over the Hei soon, and one day the whole clan, some practice in managing people will do you good'
'People! Not curses! And I'm great with people' Naoya pouted at the implied insult.
'Kukuru unit thinks differently, did you see what they wrote about you in the last month's evaluation?'
'I did and next month they'll write something nicer' Naoya answered with a charming smile. He will make them train swings till they'll lose feelings in their fingers. How dare they insult his training regimen? Maybe it's their fault for being too weak, did they thought about that? Nooo all they knew was complaining about it. Losers.
'I'm not saying that you shouldn't pressure people when needed but if you keep this up, instead of a strong unit of fighters, we'll have an army of weaklings because you tortured them instead of training' Naobito sighed and Naoya blew a raspberry at him, fully pouting at his father despite already being twenty 'don't be so grumpy now, getting out of the mansion and hanging out with people outside of the clan could be fun! Sure, they ain't exactly people, but Gakuganji mentioned them acting the part. And since they have no human rights you can bully them to your heart's content! Come on, you love bullying people with no repercussions!' Naobito explained, trying to cheer up his fussy son. Despite being hard on every other member of their clan, he had a soft spot for his one talented child. To the point of spoiling him way too much some would argue. Naoya was the apple of his eye and seeing him pout was usually enough for the older Zenin to relent and give his son whatever it was he was asking for.
But this time it seemed as if his pleading did not work, so Naoya just huffed in frustration 'I don't wanna!'
'Well too bad! Besides, nothing we can do about it now! Who else from Kyoto you expect to take care of it? Utahime? Ha! Maybe Mai can take care of two special grade curses, what do you think?' laughed Naobito while taking another swing of sake, frustrated that his efforts to pacify his son failed. And maybe he had a point... Naoya was best suited for the job... He was a genius after all, best sorcerer in the whole prefecture no doubt...
'Don't try to make it seem like some kind of award' he scoffed catching on to the manipulation, but silently feeling a bit warmer inside at being praised... 'Doesn't Tokyo have some useful sorcerers? Can't they do something about it?'
'No can do, one of them made real mess at Tokyo, they don't want them there' Naobito shrugged.
'That's so childish of them! Those lazy bums don't want to work or what?' Naoya scoffed as he made a mental note to put soma tabasco in Satoru's food next time they see each other. All his fault for sure. Six eyes and he can't use one to watch over some curses, noooo, Naoya had to do the job. Absurd 'Come on, papa, you can't be serious... That's so beneath me, you can't make me do it' he tried pleading again by showing his dad best puppy eyes he ever saw.
'No! Too late! Already decided!' Naobito responded, eyes closed and brows furrowed to avoid succumbing to his son's whims and Naoya sighed after a moment realising he really won't be able to change his father's mind and grumpily went to leave the room.
'Fine! But just so you know, once you're senile I'm sending you to the cheapest nursing home!' he yelled as and grabbed one of his father's precious anime figurines from a shelf to threw it at the wall.
'Not Makima!' he heard his father scream as he launched himself to grab the overpriced piece of plastic.
It took making the Kukuru unit run few miles before his anger level was manageable enough to leave the Zenin grounds and head for Kyoto Jujutsu High. Babysit cursed spirits. This had to be the most stupid shit he ever heard... But after giving it some thought, he figured he can at least try to do it, and once push comes to shove, let another curse kill them during a mission and get back to his peaceful life. He heard that they are both humanoid but he was still a bit shocked at just how human they looked. Other than their cursed energy, they both looked almost normal... Naoya had to stare at them for a longer moment, taking in their appearance. Way too human, gross.
'Yoo! You're gonna be our senpai then? Hahah your expression is hilarious! You're gonna be so fun!' Naoya quickly decided he despises the cheerful yet mocking voice of the taller curse. First one to tragically get murdered during their first mission then.
'Calling me senpai would imply we're in the same league, don't flatter yourself, curse' scoffed Naoya with a skewed smile.
'Hmmm I see~ That's right, I tried to be nice, but I guess it's good to state the facts. Afterall, you humans are worse than worms' came a cheerful answer.
'Alright, once again, why can't I exorcise him?' Naoya asked through gritted teeth, looking at Gakuganji who was keeping an eye on those two weirdos till now. His shining bald head looking even more bald and wrinkly than usual. Clearly looking after those two had to be soul-sucking. Someone here had to hate Naoya's guts to making him do it... Maybe he should switch out his father's booze with vinegar. Or just go straight to poison, speed up the whole inheritance process.
'As I said, the binding vow-' started the old man but was quickly interrupted.
'So rude! See! I told you we should've just went on a run! Now we're stuck with this weird looking guy!' whined again the curse with long blue hair as he turned to it's shorter, equally weird good looking companion.
'And I told you to do what you want, nobody asked you to stick around' came a low sigh from the dark haired curse. Well, one of them was supposed to be a half curse or whatever, and judging by the mark on his face, this one had to be the Death Painting connected to the Kamo clan. Ugh, why couldn't the Kamo clan deal with him then! He will make them regret once he sees them. Bunch of failures with weak techniques...
'No, seriously, fuck that, this curse is clearly hostile towards humans, let's just get rid of it, chop chop, problem gone' argued Naoya pointing at the blue haired curse and looking at Gakuganji expectantly.
'Hah! That's rich! If others could see your soul the way I see it, you would be the one getting exorcised! Seriously! Gross!' came a laughing response so Naoya of course argued back, quickly ending up bickering with the annoying curse in front of him, working out the best insults to throw at each other.
And that was the only reason why he was too preoccupied to react when a sound wave of cursed energy knocked both him and the curse out of the principals office. Once on the floor in the hallway both of them stared at each other and then at the door through which they were just unceremoniously thrown.
'I'm done, having to deal with one of them was enough of a headache' the old man grumpled still gripping at his guitar with white knuckles. Naoya was about to defend himself but after opening his mouth, his expression froze in shock as he saw Gakuganji hand an envelope to the other curse. His face even relaxed a little as he spoke to it in a much softer tone 'make sure he reads it, I'm leaving those two in your care' The half curse nodded and left the office as if being treated better than Naoya was a normal thing.
'What the- You meant to say that to me right? Hey!' Naoya barked as he got to his feet but Gakuganji just closed the door in his face, leaving him alone with two special grade curses, that were for some reason granted immunity by the sorcerer's society. This had to be a dream. How could someone treat him the same way they treat a cursed spirit, and worse than some hybrid thing?!
He was seriously debating kicking the door down but figured that old geezer isn't worth ruining his shoes 'tsk, fucking old failed rockstar, YOU GONNA DIE SOON OLD MAN!' he said calmly while only lightly kicking at the door. He didn't really need to hear any more explanations from the principle anyway, he got the gist of it from his father. But it still was annoying that he got treated this way. The taller curse annoying laughter was not helping his mood either. He decided to ignore it as much as he could and started walking towards the outside area to at least get some fresh air. The two curses following shortly after.
'Seems like you're not liked around here~' teased the more annoying one.
'Shut up'
'Uwaaah, scaryyyyy!' came a giggling response. This thing's voice could be used to torture people.
'Aren't you supposed to obey me now? Behave or I'll kill you, no matter what kind of deal you numnuts managed to strike with the higher ups' Naoya said, his voice commanding, to which the curse raised it's hands in defense and with a cheerful smile, made it's lips melt together till they disappeared off it's face '...ew' commented Naoya as he finally found a bench to sit on and sigh to lament the end of his easy life. When his father mentioned that the curses are intelligent he was hoping they at least wouldn't be annoying. But of course they would. Intelligence doesn't mean common sense or good manners.
'You should probably read these documents, it's supposed to explain more about us' said the shorter curse as he stood before Naoya holding that crap from Gakuganji. Naoya sighed thinking about slapping the papers away in a protest against that old pricks behaviour but decided against it. Trying to find a different target for his anger he looked the curse in front of him up and down. At least it wasn't unpleasant to the eye... Hairstyle was weird, but other than that and the weird clothing, it looked human. Like a good looking human even... Something between a high fashion model and a fresh corpse. Could be much worse... Not finding anything to complain about he pouted a bit and then snatched the envelope from the half curse's outstretched hand, opening it up just as the more annoying one jumped to sit next to him on the bench. He used one hand to push it away while holding up the documents to finally read through them.
Special grade curse "Mahito". Pfft, giving those things names, ridiculous, what next? Friendship bracelets? Able to manipulate bodies by touching them, including his own. Strong, sadistic, manipulative, highly intelligent.
Naoya looked at the thing in disgust as he moved his hand away from it's face and continued reading 'huh, you made quite a mess in Tokyo, how did you convince them not to kill you?' he laughed as he read about the masses of humans this curse transfigured. No way any sane person would allow this sadist to join them just because he asked nicely. In response Mahito mumbled something, without creating a new mouth so Naoya smacked it's head with the documents in frustration 'speak'
'Geez, how could I know I'm now allowed to speak!'
'Because I asked you a question, trash. It says that you're intelligent so don't pretend to be dumb now'
'Oh yeah! They said I'm very intelligent! And powerful! Equal to Satoru Gojo even!' the curse gloated proudly and Naoya's eyebrow twitched in not at all jealous manner.
'They said you're as childish as him' clarified the other one which was met with an offended gasp from Mahito. Naoya flipped the pages to find information about the dark haired curse. Half curse. Death Painting Number 1, Choso. Blood manipulation user, poisonous blood, no malice towards humans. Seems like this one was allowed a lot more freedom than it's companion.
Since Choso was probably less troublesome than the one covered with stitches, Naoya decided he might as well get some use of it, give the curse a simple task to see if it'll be obedient or give him attitude like the other one 'You're supposedly more reasonable than this idiot, since the old geezer seems to trust you. Be a dear and bring me a drink from that vending machine' he pointed with his thumb to the side and the blood manipulator lazily looked that way. Naoya tried not to stare too long at those beautiful eyes... Reminded him of a dead fish, dull and unfeeling, yet strangely captivating... 'I want milk tea' he clarified and Choso went to get it without a word of complaint. Naoya smirked a little 'at least one of you has some common sense' he said with satisfaction that the pigtailed curse didn't argue. Just went and did what was asked, why more people couldn't be this way?
'Yeah you right about that, but the one with common sense is actually me' Mahito clarified just as they heard glass breaking. Naoya sighed and hanged his head already knowing what happened... He massaged his face to relief some stress and once he opened his eyes, Choso was standing before him, handing him a bottle of tea, seemingly unbothered by the piece of glass stuck in his hand, or the smashed up vending machine standing to the side of them. Naoya stared at him for a long moment, before deciding that destruction of school property shouldn't bother him so much. Just make sure to keep an eye on those freaks if they ever get close to things he owns.
'Huh, my favourite brand too, not so bad' he noticed and took the bottle with a small smile 'So? How did you convince them that you're on our side?' Naoya asked as he looked at Mahito again, who was now busy picking out glass from Choso's hand. Were curses able to care for each other...? Weird.
'I showed them the extend of my powers and they decided it's more profitable to let me help you guys out! You are severely lacking in healers after all'
'Aaaha' he muttered in response and looked back into his documents, reading the actual reason for the two of them still being alive. Their help was appreciated, but the real bargaining chip was Sukuna's finger. Or rather 10 of them. Convincing argument... Enough to make the higher ups accept two weird curses as their new slaves employees. To ensure they'll behave, they both made binding vows forcing them to stay on the sorcerers side or die. Mahito was forbid from causing harm and/or transfiguring any humans. In exchange he was to be provided with no hostility from the sorcerers for the time of their cooperation 'and you agreed to this because...?'
'I had a change of heart and no longer wish to harm human beings' Mahito said with a sweet smile on his lips. An obvious lie.
'...he got scared Geto will lock him up in a pokeball' came a more honest answer from the death painting and another insulted "hey" from the patchface next to him. Naoya was about to ask how did the half curse knew about pokemon but not how to use a vending machine but decided against it. Answer would definitely be stupid and make his headache worse. He tried to tune out Mahito's complains and whining about how he was totally not scared of Geto or whatever as he read the contents of the other binding vow. Working as a sorcerer and in exchange, his younger brothers were to be provided with a peaceful life. An older brother then? Maybe Naoya would be able to push his responsibilities onto him. He had some experience in that field, always making his stupid brothers do his chores. And it seemed like Choso already was doing some Mahito babysitting. Maybe he can make Choso work even more, while he only pretends to do so and collect the paycheck?
'So you have siblings huh' Naoya mused mildly interested, and almost jumped in surprise as the half curse's face suddenly lit up, entirely losing the corpsy appearance. The change was so shocking he almost choked on his tea.
'Yes! 8 of them! Eso and Kechizu were incarnated alongside me, but our younger brothers are still in jars. There is Noranso, Shouso, Tanso-' Choso started to list them and Naoya was slightly taken aback, while Mahito just grabbed the other curse and covered his mouth with a hand, while holding him in a hug. It. Not him. It definitely still was an it in Naoya's mind. It's just a curse pretending to be human. Nothing else.
'He gonna keep at it for hours if we won't stop it quick' Mahito clarified finding it clearly amusing even once Choso used a blood blade to cut off Mahito's arm 'ouch, feisty today aren't we?' Mahito whined as Choso moved away with a huff. Mahito weirdly unbothered by the lost limb.
'And you will be grateful to hear about them, even if it's the 100th time I'm telling the same story' snarled Choso as now he and Mahito got busy arguing about something idiotic. Naoya sighed and rested his head on his hand as he watched Choso use the cut off hand to smack Mahito, who in turn changed the hand into a tentacle and wrapped it around the pigtailed curse. Naoya decided he was going to kill his father for making him do this shitty job... Maybe even use Choso's blood as poison? He could already hear his aunts crying during the funeral. So young! Such a good leader! But thankfully he left the clan in good hands. All praise Naoya, the 27th leader! So young and handsome but already so accomplished! Ehh beautiful dream... but not yet... It would be too suspicious to do it now after they had a fight. He'll wait till someone else gets into an argument with him. Maybe Maki will? Oh she definitely will. Alright, get Choso's blood, poison dad, frame Maki. Perfect plan. His daydreaming ended when a splash of blood hit him square in the face. Both Mahito and Choso stopping their wrestling match for a moment to stare at him. Mahito dared to snort with laughter...
'Ah, my bad' was all the apology he received as the blood manipulator manipulated the blood off his face. Maybe he should just let those two kill each other? But what if he won't get paid for his wasted day if that happens? He needed to at least be compensated for his time. He stood up in silence and bonked both of them on their empty little heads, fully revelling in the fact that they were not allowed to hit him back.
'Next time you splash my face like a fucking squid I'll turn you into shiokara' he threatened as he tugged on the curse's pigtail to accentuate his point. Threat fully empty. He had no idea how to cook 'weren't you kept in a jar for a century? Guess I won't even need to marinate you then, already came pre-pickled. Might explain why your brain ain't working' he huffed letting go of the curse who looked just slightly bothered by the insult.
'Hey, don't be mean to him! It's not easy being a pickled fetus for decades!' Mahito argued and hugged his companion protectively, as if he wasn't strangling him few seconds ago.
'And you! I don't even know what's wrong with you, other than the whole being a curse issue. I mean, even people who are forced to spend time with Satoru can't stand you! Piss me off more and I'll personally drive you to Suguru's house so he can suck your worthless ass up' another empty threat. He had no drivers license. Not after he destroyed 3 of Naobito's cars. A danger to himself and everyone around him as the police said. Not his fault for loving speed... 'From now on, you two listen to me, alright?' he added, poking Mahito on his face stitch when it looked like he was going to open his mouth 'I'm going to be the future head of the clan, and you two better not stand in my way' as he said so, he took a swing with his half empty tea bottle and threw it straight at Gakuganji's office window, smiling wide when he heard it break and the old geezer scream his name in annoyance 'alright, and now we bounce' he announced and using his technique, ran as far away as he could to avoid getting hit with another sound wave.
Right after making this amazing speech and running away from the crime scene, he ended up coughing his lungs out in a shitty old house was full of dust. His two stupid companions somehow caught up to him after a while and they took a short trip to the place mentioned in the documents. Kamo clan, as part of the agreement provided them with some old dilapidated house to use. They should've instead provide them with a babysitter, Naoya thought as he yet again tried to figure out why in the fresh hell it just had to be him? Wasn't the little Kamo brat already 10 or so? Perfect to take care of this instead of him. He should've at least made Ranta deal with it, but that lucky bastard was away on a mission with Jinichi. Two bastards. Meanwhile Naoya was stuck helping two curses move in... This was definitely way beneath him. If Toji ever hears about it he gonna piss himself laughing...
'Anyway, are you really fit to handle us? I thought they gonna send someone strong since that old fart was mumbling something about not putting weaker sorcerers at risk but, you can't even handle some dust, are you really fine?' came a fakely concerned question from Mahito as he patted Naoya's back to help him cough.
'Don't worry about me I'll manage' Naoya said through gritted teeth and pushed the offending hand away as he covered his nose with his sleeve and stepped deeper into the building 'ugh, what am I even doing hereee' he whined while looking around 'You're forbidden from leaving alone, at least for now. They gonna assign you some, some fucking guy to come around and check on you when you're not needed, but for today I'm the one stuck with you, so if you need anything I gueeeeess I'll help you get it' he mumbled, extremely unhappy about it. Beneath him. Entirely beneath him.
'I want a huge TV and a bunch of movies to watch!' cheerfully proclaimed Mahito.
'I meant necessities, I'm not getting you a TV or any fucking DVDs' scoffed Naoya as he took another step. Suddenly the floorboards underneath him gave in, and he ended up knee deep in the floor, a pile of dust rising and targeting his poor nose. He almost missed getting squirted in the face with blood. But now as he thought about it, no, he didn't. Gross. Annoyed to the point of not even reacting, he just silently stared ahead of himself, longing for the life he used to have... Spending days at home, forcing the Kukuru unit to do push ups till they puke, having nice relaxing walks during the evening, refreshing runs in the morning, sometimes going to a club in the city to get drunk and pick up girls... He would sometimes take up an interesting mission and exorcise a curse or two if he felt like it... And look at him now... stuck in the floor...
'Is floor supposed to do that? Is there a hidden room?' came weirdly innocent question from Choso who crouched beside him with a curious expression. Naoya couldn't yet decide if he was mad about it or not. Mahito laughed joyfully on his other side, and Naoya was almost grateful that this one wasn't causing him to have conflicting feelings.
'Sorry, he was supposed to get his knowledge from his vessel, but his vessel was a dumbass, so we are stuck with him also being a dumbass' Mahito laughed as he bent over a little and poked Choso's head, to which said dumbass pouted in annoyance.
'You're the one who chose that vessel so don't complain now' he grumbled as he walked away clearly frustrated, to which Mahito just laughed more.
'Anyway, necessities hmm~' he hummed and grabbed Naoya by the armpits before lifting him out of the hole and placing him back on his feet. Surprisingly effortlessly. Bastard was strong... 'let's see, I'm mostly fine but Choso will need something to eat. I don't know what to feed him tho, so you think about it~' he beamed before running off to check out different rooms, screaming gleefully that he found more holes in the floor... Naoya leaned on the wall and sighed yet again, trying to convince himself that it was going to get easier. After psyching himself up he called out to the half curse, hoping he won't accidentally start yapping about his brothers again.
'You, Death Painting, what do you want to eat' he asked as politely as he could considering his overall mood.
'Hm? I don't know' came a very helpful answer.
'Then find out'
'...Orange?' Choso crooked his head to the side staring at him like an owl as he answered. Weird little thing.
'That's... one fruit' Naoya clarified.
'I tried those before, I wouldn't mind them'
'You need more than one fruit dummy' Naoya sighed and massaged his forehead 'What are you, a kid?' he added grumpily as he made his way to the kitchen, scolding himself for already thinking about this thing as if it was a human. Of course it didn't know anything about nutrition, it was a curse. Half or not, spent over a century as a pickle, Naoya probably shouldn't expect much from it 'do you even know how to cook?' he asked and seeing the thing shake it's head chuckled a little, feeling superior for no reason 'heh, you may look human but you're really nothing like the real deal' he mocked him in satisfaction as he checked if the kitchen appliances were working.
'I never claimed to be' Choso shrugged his shoulders in response as he closely observed everything Naoya was doing.
'Really? You don't share your friend's convictions about humans being worms then?'
'Not really, I don't care for neither humans nor curses. I only care for my brothers' ah there was the horrid topic again.
'You really are a dumbass then. If you don't pose any threat to humans, you should've just grabbed those brothers and ran far from the jujutsu society. Now you're basically on our mercy' Naoya scoffed as he opened up the fridge, empty but working.
'...my brothers... wouldn't be able to blend with the crowd...' Choso said sorrowfully while playing around with tongs 'it was either this or killing all humans and making curses the dominant species. But after giving it some thought, it sounded way too risky, so I picked this option' he clarified and put the tongs away, already bored with them, but not before pinching Naoya's nose with them. Naoya mercifully decided to let it slide this one time... And not at all because he felt threatened by the way this curse nonchalantly mentioned considering genocide.
'So exterminating all humans was on the table, huh?' Naoya asked despite a little shiver going down his back. He thought this one was stupid but harmless, but he was also slightly insane. He should've known better.
'For a while' Choso shrugged without much care 'so is it bad to just eat oranges?' he asked crossing his arms in deep thought.
'Did you seriously only eat oranges?'
'We also found some bread but it wasn't as good'
'Seriously, how did you even survive' Naoya sighed rubbing at his eyes. If he remembered correctly, the Death Paintings got stolen from Tokyo's school about a month ago. Maybe it was fair that the newborn curse didn't figure out what to eat yet... 'I'll get you some oranges then since you like them, and some easy to prepare meals... Speaking off I'm getting hungry, let's just order some food, I'll pick you something tasty' he decided. Might as well try to be nice to this one if he wanted to push his Mahito wrangling responsibilities on him.
'Ah, there's no need, I ate few days ago' Choso said after checking cupboards without much interest.
'Do you not need to eat every day?' Naoya asked a bit surprised. Well, the guy wasn't human after all...
'Yes, I will only start passing out after a week or so'
'Passing out...' Naoya repeated staring in disbelief, and as on cue, Choso's stomach growled at them pathetically.
'It does that sometimes, no clue why' Choso said with a frown. Naoya closed his eyes and took a big breath in... and out... and grabbed Choso by his weird purple fabric to give him a good shake.
'You're seriously an idiot. I'm ordering dinner'
After ordering some noodles from the closest ramen shop, they sat down together in the living room, where Mahito was excited to find a working TV and was trying his best to find something interesting to watch, finally deciding on some game show. Naoya just slurped his noodles trying his best to ignore the clumsy way in which Choso was eating. But once he started using his chopsticks to stab at the food, Naoya put his bowl down with force that spilled some broth and grabbed Choso's offending wrist.
'How can you not know how to use them!' he shrieked in annoyance but was still nice enough to patiently fix his grip on the chopsticks and showed him how to use them, instead of just killing the little freak.
'Don't be mean~' Mahito dared to pull at Naoya's hakama from his spot on the floor 'I taught him all I knew, okay?!'
'Ah so it's your fault he wasn't fed properly' Naoya scoffed and smacked Mahito's hand away as Choso was now trying out the chopsticks in his hand and quickly mastered the art of eating ramen. At least he was a fast learner...
'I gave him food when he asked!' Mahito complained clearly offended 'not my fault he has zero self preservation skills'
'It was easier to stab at it' grumbled Choso as he stabbed his chopsticks into an unsuspecting piece of turnip in his soup.
'Too bad, you're an adult and you gonna eat like one' Naoya scolded him only for the half curse to pout at him but obediently fix the grip again. He wasn't happy about it though.
'Anyway, senpai, it's unfair, you know our names but we don't know yours! If we're supposed to work together you better introduce yourself too~'
'Thinking about curses speaking my name is way too gross, no way' Naoya scoffed as he finished his portion. Anger always made him hungry.
'That bald guy said it was something oya' Choso mentioned not caring for the insult in the slightest.
'Oh! Guessing game! What kind of 'oya' is our senpai! My guess is Grumpoya, because he's so grumpy, Choso what do you think?'
'Blondoya?' Choso shrugged and Mahito giggled, daring to rest his chin on Naoya's knee.
'Is blondie all he is to you? You gotta try better than that'
'Hmm Annoya? He is constantly annoyed'
'Oh that's better! And he is annoying too!'
'It's Na o ya!' Naoya finally snapped and pushed Mahito's head off his knee.
'Huh, surprisingly close' Choso noticed.
'Yeah let's stick to Annoya I liked it better' Mahito confirmed. Naoya never was bullied at school, always being the one doing the bullying, but now he thought he was finally experiencing that feeling... Was it a punishment for being so ungodly handsome...? It had to be, he didn't remember committing any other sins...
'Great, does Stinkhito and Chodiot want the oh so annoying senpai to leave them here to starve then?'
'So you agree you're our senpai!' Mahito beamed in excitement as he ignored the insult.
'Ugh, whatever I don't care anymore' Naoya sighed and leaned back on the couch, closing his eyes in defeat.
'i can't eat more, should I throw it out?' Choso asked, clearly unbothered by names or threats.
'...Put it in the fridge and heat it up tomorrow'
'Why tomorrow?'
'You should eat properly everyday'
'That's so much work' Choso dared to sigh.
'Welcome to being alive little curse' Naoya sighed trying to ignore the way Mahito was now crawling on the couch to rest his head on his lap again. This was hell... And his father thrown him here... 'You know what, I changed my mind, I'll buy you those DVDs, hell, I'll buy you whatever you want, lets go shopping' He decided standing up and accidentally throwing Mahito to the floor. He might as well hit old man where it hurt. If he was going to suffer, he will at least drain his papa's booze resources.
Once at the store, he tasked Choso with pushing the shopping cart while he walked around and tried to figure out what kind of food would they have to buy. Vegetables? Definitely. Meat? He didn't trust the pigtailed airhead not to somehow give himself food poisoning by eating it raw. Maybe buy some frozen ingredients so that he is forced to cook them properly? He spared one glance at Choso who was now pushing around Mahito in the cart as if that was an acceptable behaviour. He would definitely eat frozen meat. "It's too much work to cook" he could already hear as he imagined him chewing a frozen chicken leg. Vegetables and snacks then. Maybe oranges too since he liked those. Not too much or he'll definitely just eat those and nothing else. And why exactly did Naoya care if the little curse gives himself food poisoning? He was going mad... It's not that he cared, it would just be more troublesome if that thing got sick is all. Yes, this explanation made sense. He threw some sweets into the cart, not caring that they hit Mahito, but got mad once he saw the curse open up a bar of chocolate and take a bite out of it.
'Don't do that, you're supposed to buy them first' he said snatching chocolate away from Mahito's grabby little hands.
'Whaat? That's stupid, you gonna pay anyway, let me eat it'
'You're such a nuisance, if you want to live in our world you better follow the rules!'
'You guys created stupid rules, that's why you're so inferior to my kind' Mahito scoffed so Naoya grabbed him by the shirt.
'Maybe I should end your misery and exorcise you then, huh?' he asked feeling that he is close to popping a blood vessel.
'You know you look really insane to everyone around us, right?' Choso's voice reminded him that Mahito was actually invisible to everyone else at the store, and Naoya was basically looking like a fool 'Don't want people to think I'm weird too, so join me once you're finished' half curse added and went ahead, leaving blushing Naoya behind to be ogled by the people around them. Mahito smirking with satisfaction at the humiliation. Bastard.
Naoya let go of him and slowly straightened up, before silently following after Choso. Then quickly walking back to grab the forgotten shopping cart, red in the face, avoiding eye contact with everyone at the snack aisle. Once he was away from that embarrassing place, he noticed that he couldn't follow Choso, as said Choso disappeared.
'Great job Mr Babysitter. You lost him' Mahito chuckled beside him as he finally decided to get out of the cart and was now pushing it himself. Naoya had no more mental strength to care about how that looked to other people. Why were they even shopping at this hour? Do people not work in this country anymore? Everyone just had to show up at the same store as him today?!
'I didn't, he went and lost himself on his own' Naoya grumbled as he tried to look for the two spiky pigtails between the aisles. How was someone so weird looking so easy to lose?!
'Hmmm... Alright I'll help you look~ don't want my bestie to get in trouble' Mahito decided as he suddenly grew taller and started looking around from a higher altitude. Naoya just hoped that by "bestie" he meant Choso and not him... 'Chosooo~ Come out, I'll change my hand into Kechizu's face, don't hiiiide~ Ah! There he is' he pointed so Naoya followed to find the lost problem child, only to see him getting poked at by some drunk guy. Perfect... Of course this bonbon was the type to get himself in trouble and let people walk all over him without even noticing... Would probably go off with a stranger if offered sweets too.
'Ah, Naoya, you're done acting weird? I found the movie section' Choso said, apparently unbothered by the strange guy that had his arm around his waist, and was messing with his hair.
'-I mean what normal guy keeps his hair like this? Are you one of those cosplayers? Kids these days, you should wear proper clothes while being out in public! Dressing like this, you're asking for trouble' the man was rumbling clearly going at it for a while now... Mahito stood next to him and was making ugly faces at the guy, taking advantage of his invisibility. Naoya had a feeling he would probably transform him into one of those disgusting creatures he saw in the documents if not for the binding vow.
'Don't let people treat you this way' Naoya sighed coming closer to free his curse from the annoying stranger.
'But I'm not allowed to kill them' Choso reminded him as if that was the only option he had. Alright, Naoya, be an adult and set an example.
'You can be assertive without killing them you know. You can try like this' he started patiently, after all it wasn't really Choso's fault he was so uneducated in the art of being human 'Get your filthy hands of him if you don't want to lose them' he said sternly to the man, not opposed to beating him up to let out some steam. Threat worked too well, because the man quickly let go and ran off with a pathetic noise. Alright then... He will have to relax in the evening then, by beating up someone from the Hei during their training. Or maybe convince his father to spar with him.
'Thanks, that was getting a bit annoying' said Choso as he fixed his hair. Naoya thought it was just a simple weird hairstyle, but the two buns were surprisingly twisted in an elaborate way that made them stick up so much.
'...You better take a long bath, you never know what kind of dirty shit those people carry on their hands'
'Can't be dirtier than me, Mahito made us live in the sewers' came a shocking response.
'Please say you're kidding'
'Don't worry, I was taking baths'
'Jesus... not in said sewers tho, right?' Naoya almost begged.
'No. In the river' Choso scoffed. It was at least a bit better...
'Great... Mahito, get the movies you want and find us, we gonna look at the soap section'
'Why would you need soap? If you're have dirt on you just scratch it off, that's what I do' Naoya decided to not hear those words for his own sanity, as he grabbed Choso's sleeve and led him away.
Their little shopping trip ended without many other issues. He ended up buying Choso a phone so that he didn't have to rely on Mahito for his knowledge about human life, made sure their house had running water, convinced them that fruity smelling shampoo was not for eating (not sure if his arguments worked on Mahito though) and finally in the evening left the place and got home. Feeling too drained to even go beat anyone up, he just buried his face in a pillow and screamed out in frustration.
This was going to be so annoying...
At least for the upcoming days, it was going to be some poor assistant director who will have to deal with those two dumbasses in case they urgently needed anything. Naoya was supposed to just make sure they acclimate to the life of a sorcerer, be responsible for them during missions, and help out if there was any issue.
It was still too much work.
He had to somehow let a curse kill them on their first mission.
Or at least kill Mahito.
However, despite his plans, their first mission ended right after they arrived on the location, he didn't even get a chance to think about staging an accident. And he was the fastest sorcerer in the world! Satoru and his dad didn't count.
Turns out Mahito wasn't just annoying, but also terrifyingly strong. Choso clearly expected it since he just leaned on the wall and was seemingly taking a nap, while his friend was running around butchering low level curses.
'No hang ups about killing your own kind huh?' he commented as Mahito returned after finishing their job.
'Don't make me sound so cruel~ I still think curses should be the dominant species. But I guess I don't have any personal attachment to all of them. You also don't seem the kind to protect every human you meet just because you share genetics' Mahito laughed as he wiped off his clothes. Maybe to someone else this would sound awful, but Naoya silently agreed with the sentiment. He never cared for saving others, he became a sorcerer just because he was amazing at it. When he thought about it, he couldn't even imagine a single person he would want to protect. He only cared for his own wellbeing. But hearing the same way of thinking reflected back at him from a curse's mouth was kinda gross 'and it's nice to finally get some exercise. You should've also move a little Choso!' he continued as he jumped to give his friend a hug. Naoya shuddered at the idea of hugging this blue sadistic weirdo, meanwhile Choso just relaxed in the embrace 'hahah, see? You're getting waaay too lazy' Mahito commented as he picked him up and let him nap on his back. At least when he was too busy with killing curses or bothering Choso, Naoya was spared the suffering of Mahito talking to him.
Some time later, Naoya realised he truly went mad. After few missions together, he found it even somewhat amusing to bicker with Mahito...
In his defence, it was way too boring to just stand and watch him exorcise the curses, so he joined in. And so, all their missions turned into competitions. And sure, SOMETIMES, they argued so much that they forgot about a curse running at them, and Choso's well timed piercing blood saved their asses, but Naoya would never admit it.
And he would also never admit that he started to enjoy their company...
So really, the reason he was now at their house, was just because he was taking his job seriously and wanted to help those idiots get used to human life faster. Nothing else. Just a diligent worker doing his best to contribute to the society.
He didn't bother knocking, and just kicked the door open as he made his way inside, noticing that the hole he fell in few weeks ago was now fixed.
'Yoo, tweedledee, tweedledum, your favourite senpai came to grace you with his presence' he announced as he walked further in, smelling something uncharacteristically delicious... Did they order take out? He didn't know if they even had money to do that. The higher ups decided to provide them with shelter and food, but didn't pay them for the missions, instead Naoya was getting the money. It didn't seem like Mahito and Choso even needed any, so he felt no guilt over it. He deserved all of it and more for putting up with them. He was even working over time, coming over to watch movies with them and teach them about human life. He deserved a raise and a promotion.
'Great, just what I needed' Choso suddenly popped out of the kitchen and dragged him in 'Mahito has no taste buds, and I'm not sure if mine even work correctly, so try this' he ordered as he unceremoniously pushed a spoon into Naoya's mouth, and normally Naoya would probably get mad for being treated this way, spit the foreign object right into his assailant's face, but damn, that soup was delicious...
'Fuck... that's good...' he finally commented after swallowing and looked over the kitchen, which was now extremely messy... Covered in clear signs of someone cooking... 'you made this?' Naoya gasped in amazement and went to get another spoon from the pot.
'He's been at it for a whole week now' came a whine from Mahito who just entered the kitchen and jumped to sit at the countertop to pour himself a bowl from the pot.
'No fair! Why are you cooking for this asshole? You two can't even appreciate how tasty this is!' Naoya fumed pushing Mahito's hands away so that he could get a bowl of soup that had no gross Mahito energy in it 'fuck I should visit more often' he mumbled with a smile sitting down. How come the chef at his house didn't cook this well?! This was clear injustice...
'I'm not doing it for any of you ungrateful bastards' Choso scoffed with his eyebrows furrowed before relaxing his face in an angelic expression, and both Naoya and Mahito rolled their eyes as they could already hear the rest of that sentence 'next month I'll be allowed to visit my brothers, I want to surprise them with a homemade meal. Utahime lent me some cooking books so I've been practicing' he said proudly. How and when he managed to befriend that woman totally beyond Naoya. For some reason everyone in Kyoto slowly but surely came to like this pigtailed weirdo. He even once saw some elderly neighbours giving him vegetables from their garden 'now, are you really sure it's good? Is it good enough to feed my brothers? Or is it just good because your tongue is also not working like Mahito's?' Choso asked, angelic expression fully gone as he got closer to inspect Naoya's face.
'My tongue works where it matters!' argued Mahito before stretching out his tongue and turning it into a straw that he used to suck out the soup straight from the pot like an overgrown mosquito.
'Ok, let me explain it this way, normally seeing something like this would make me lose my appetite... but honestly I'm almost tempted to go for another bowl...' Naoya admitted after a long sigh 'but I won't'
'Hmm... alright, that's fair' Choso nodded with satisfaction.
'Anyway, to what do we owe the pleasure of seeing your ugly piss stained hair?' asked Mahito once he finished clowning around with the soup.
'For the last time, it's bleach, I didn't put piss on my hair. If I did, I would smell more like you' Naoya huffed, finding himself no longer as angered by Mahito's comments as he used to.
'Stop it, I finally made him take a bath, he should finally smell nice'
'No matter how many baths he takes, his rotten soul with still shine through'
'That goes for you too, seriously, your soul is the most rotten one here' laughed Mahito almost falling off the counter.
'And yet I smell better than you' smirked Naoya unbothered by the insult. Who cares what his soul looked like? Only Mahito saw that.
'If you're done teasing each other, why did you come here? I wasn't notified of any missions today' asked more politely Choso as he finally also poured himself a bowl of soup.
'Ah, yeah, no missions today... just kindaa' Naoya trailed off then focused on Choso and frowned 'seriously? Mahito's tongue was swirling around in this. Better throw it out before you catch some disease from his saliva' he reminded him with a disgusted expression seeing how Choso without any care started eating.
'I've had worse' Choso shrugged and Mahito giggled innocently beside him.
'Instead of changing subject, admit why you visited~! You missed us!' now the curse openly laughed and Naoya felt his cheeks gaining colour, definitely because the soup was slightly spicy...
'You wish'
'It's the truth! You wanted to hang out with your friends~'
'You two are NOT my friends' Naoya refuted angrily.
'We're working together, you take us grocery shopping, you're visiting when you're bored and you eat at our house. We are your friends' Mahito counted with a satisfied smirk.
'Taking care of you is my job, I'm not doing this for fun' huffed Naoya trying to remind himself of this truth. He was a diligent worker. Nothing else.
'Hm... Delusional' Mahito commented to which Choso bumped him lightly with his elbow.
'Don't be like that, I'm sure Naoya really is here because of his job. If not for the job, he would spend time with his real friends, not us'
'You think he has any?'
'Of course, there's no way we are his only friends. How sad would that be?' now Choso was also smirking. It was rare to see him smirk but any time he did, Naoya could feel even his ears heating up. From rage of course. No way he found that mocking expression attractive...
'Yeah that would be sad, because who in their right mind would ever want to be friends with you two assholes'
'Riiight? I mean, I killed soooo many people! And you come over to play boardgames with me, this is hilarious!' laughed Mahito till he rolled off the counter to the floor. And really, HOW exactly Naoya ended up like this...? All his father's fault.
'All part of my job! And today it's also part of the job! I just want to make sure you idiots can survive on your own as part of the society, so I'm gonna train you in using public transport today!' he decided finally. Yes, this sounded reasonable.
'Sooooo... you're taking us on a trip' Choso smirked and Naoya just went to grumpily finish his soup.
Alright, maybe it was true that he didn't have any other friends... But implying that those two were now automatically his friends was also incorrect. He was just killing some boredom. At least that's what he told himself again and again as he showed them around all the cool places in Kyoto he wanted to visit. He definitely wanted to spend an hour in the bamboo forest for his own entertainment and not just to see Choso's amazed face as he stared up at all the plants.
'Hmm~ So you do show on photos...' he commented as he pointed his phone at his dark haired companion. He got him to dress up in some casual clothes he got for him so that they wouldn't look too weird, but the half curse still had his hair in two buns, so people stared at them anyway. The nose mark wasn't exactly subtle either. It wasn't bothering Naoya so much, and at least it was easier to find him in a crowd whenever he decided to split from the group and go look at something on his own.
'Why are you taking photos?' Choso asked, not bothering to pose but not stopping Naoya either.
'Just for fun' Naoya mumbled trying to get the best lighting, which was hard to do with Mahito hanging on his shoulder. He learnt few weeks ago that it was useless to swat him away, as the curse will glue itself back to where it was after few minutes. And it wasn't entirely unpleasant. Choso had to really smother him in soap, because the swamp dweller finally smelled quite enjoyable.
'Lucky! I also want to get a photo... Hey, Nao, develop some curse tool that will be able to take pictures of us. I want a photo with Chosooo' Mahito whined at his side.
'Suck my dick I ain't doing shit for you'
'If I suck it will you make it?' Naoya sighed and pushed Mahito off, who just giggled as he run to Choso and hugged him from behind 'come on, you're not posing at all, you've got great body, time to show it off~' he chuckled as he manipulated Choso's pose to be more graceful and fit for the picture.
'Oh, that's actually good, hold him like this' Naoya smirked as he took more photos.
'Is bothering me really this fun for you two?' Choso sighed as if he was being tortured.
'Don't talk or your face gonna look dumb' Naoya laughed although even when he was talking, his face looked good in the photos... Lucky bastard with perfect face... Well, Naoya was also extremely beautiful so it's not like he was jealous.
'Don't you want to send a nice picture of yourself to Eso?' asked Mahito as he held him tight against himself.
'I can send him photos of the forest, no reason to send him photos of me, he knows how I look' Choso said with a confused frown, his cute nose scrunching a little...
'That's not what it's about. You send photos of yourself to your friends and family because you want to show them what you're doing. Wouldn't you want to get a photo of them too? It makes you feel closer to each other, you can look at the photo even when they are away' Naoya clarified with a sigh and noticed how after thinking this through Choso's expression softened a lot. So he took a perfect photo of him. It was slightly unfair how good looking this guy was, maybe human experiments had some good sides to it if they created such beauty...
'Do you also send photos to your friends and family?' Choso asked seemingly innocently, but it might as well have been a trap.
'Of course, all the time' he skillfully lied with a smile on his face. It wasn't even fully a lie. He had a very successful instagram account where lots of people were thirsting over his photos.
'But you never sent us any!' Mahito complained.
'Cause you ain't my friend nor family' Naoya maturely stuck out his tongue at him while putting his phone away, only for Choso to snatch it out of his hand 'you've got your own, what do you need?' Naoya sighed without much irritation. If it was Mahito, he would wrangle his phone out of the curse's hand to prevent him from breaking it, but he trusted Choso to have a good reason to take it. Wait, he trusted Choso..? That's a stupid thought. He wasn't supposed to trust any of these guys...
'Yours is already out' was all the warning he got before Choso took a photo of him.
'Hey. Who said you can do that' Naoya frowned stepping closer to get his phone back, but then Mahito grabbed him from behind and locked him in place.
'And who said you can take photos of me? This is just to get even. Besides, the scenery is nice, your friends and family would love to see this' Choso said while stepping back and taking more photos.
'How annoying... And why are you holding me? This should be against the rules'
'I'm not harming you so it's a okaaay~'
'You're harming my public image' Naoya sighed but didn't resist. He might as well let the two have some fun... Not because he liked them, just because it was less bothersome this way. He always looked great in photos, so if they were mocking him, it wouldn't work. But then suddenly Mahito grabbed his face and stretched the corners of his lips apart, causing him to make a grotesque smile 'Asshole!' Naoya tried to wrestle out but the curse just giggled while continuing to hold him.
'I want to be seen in the picture too~' he laughed until Naoya managed to throw him off his back.
'Heh this one was the best' Choso chuckled clearly satisfied with the photos as he showed Naoya one where seemingly for no reason his facial muscles just started spasming. Mahito almost fell over from laughter.
'Both of you are assholes, delete this' Naoya scoffed as he grabbed his phone and quickly went to delete the last few photos.
'Already sent it to myself' Choso smirked and Naoya stared at him angrily, debating if he is ready to fight him just to break his phone 'come on Grumpoya, it's a cute photo' Choso actually rolled his eyes... Definitely spending time with Mahito and Naoya made him more sassy than he was ever supposed to be.
And Naoya was not yet ready to admit that he was starting to find it endearing.
He felt like he was a loser in high school, getting picked on by the cooler upperclassmen. Usually he was the cool upperclassman, this was way too confusing for his brain... 'besides if it's for your family they would enjoy one when you're having fun, right?'
'Yeah yeah, if you really have some cool friends we don't know about, then they would appreciate a funny photo, right? 'Cause you sure have friends, right?' Mahito joined in, mockingly. Bastard.
'They would prefer the photo where I look as good as I deserve, not one where I look like I'm having a stroke' Naoya huffed smiling a little despite himself. It was a funny expression... 'Anyway, walk the talk then, make an ugly face to send to your precious brothers' he smirked as he pointed the camera at Choso again.
'Hmm alright' Choso thought a little before sucking in his cheeks, making his beautiful face imitate a fish, and causing both of his companions to burst out laughing.
'What even is that, that's awful' Naoya wiped at his eye forgetting entirely to take the photo.
'Yeah you're not good at it at alllll! You gotta do it more like this' argued Mahito before suddenly opening up his mouth and showing off a second, disgustingly twisted face emerging from his throat.
'God, no, definitely don't do it like that' Naoya chuckled, already used to seeing different gross sides of Mahito's shapeshifting body 'you both suck at it' he said before hooking his arms around both of their necks, which was a bit hard because of Mahito's freakishly tall body, and then he took a photo of the three of them. Or rather two. Still, there was a space left in the frame and Naoya's raised elbow indicated where exactly Mahito's body would be 'now to just fix it a littleee' he hummed as he edited the photo and put a cute sticker of a bunny in the place where Mahito's face would be 'perfect' he grinned and Choso chuckled next to him.
'That does look like you'
'Hard to argue the facts, I am adorable' Mahito nodded clearly satisfied so Naoya let go of them, suddenly feeling a bit embarrassed at just how friendly he became with those two.
'Alright, great, let's go, we have more stuff to see today'
'You mean more lessons about public transportation' Choso reminded him with a grin, a matching one on Mahito's face
'Yes! Exactly, that's what I meant!' he felt himself blushing as he noticed the other two looking at each other meaningfully 'Ugh, shut up!' he shouted as he stomped away, knowing full well the two curses will follow behind him.
Next he decided to show them the Kinkakuji temple, or rather how to get to it, how to buy tickets for a train and stuff like that. He didn't actually want to show them the temple!
'Gotta say the one thing humans are good for is building nice things, this is kinda fun to look at~' Mahito admitted after seeing the gold covered building.
'Right, curses couldn't ever do anything as cool as this' Naoya agreed with a grin.
'But it would be more fun to visit if there was no humans around' Mahito sighed and Naoya agreed, because the crowd of people was a bit annoying... 'hah! Knew it, you're as rotten as me, your soul fucking loooved this idea'
'Nah, I still need some people around, who else would serve me' Naoya shrugged a little 'your human extermination plan is just way too radical'
'So what, when you kill cockroaches in your house do you leave a few around to not be too radical?' Mahito blew a raspberry as if Naoya was the one not making sense.
'I don't see what's annoying you two so much. Humans, cockroaches, it's not that bothersome'
'You can't be serious, cockroaches are the worst' Naoya made a disgusted face at the idea of those little critters not being bothersome. But it would explain why Choso was never bothered by Mahito.
'Anyway, do you think Mahito will disappear if you ring that bell' Choso asked once they arrived at the temple's bell.
'Let's find out'
'Hey!'
Next they went on a walk through the park, enjoying fresh air and some snacks that were sold there. There was even a little statue that was supposed to grant your wish if you threw a coin in it's bucket. He saw Choso's excitement so he gave him a coin to try it out.
'Don't break the statue' Naoya warned him as he saw the blood manipulator aim, and then relax a little once he remembered he wasn't trying to pierce through the statue with said coin. It's amazing just how much public property he was able to destroy without a care in the world. Mahito was a nuisance and sadist, but at least his attacks usually didn't mean cutting through buildings the way Choso's did... Once he threw the coin perfectly into the bucket both Naoya and Mahito clapped unenthusiastically.
'What did you wish for?'
'For Naoya to get some actual friends' Choso answered with a serene expression on his face.
'You dick, I told you I have friends! That's it! I'm gonna wish for God to punish you for mocking me!' Naoya huffed as he took out more coins and started throwing them, only for all of them to miss 'Not fair! Why?!'
'Hah! Een God is mocking you, poor Nao~' Mahito teased him and went ahead while Naoya hanged over the fence grumpy and defeated with all his coins gone.
'Don't be so depressed, I was just joking, I asked for good health for my brothers' Choso poked his cheek and Naoya blushed a little, not feeling all that great about being the butt of a joke.
'Well it was a shitty joke...! I have friends, okay? Just all of them were busy today, and I was getting bored for the last few days' Naoya was fully aware that it sounded as believable as the "my girlfriend goes to a different school" excuse 'you guys are annoying but at least I'm not bored, that's all' he added as he tried to chip at the wooden fence, deciding that some vandalism will cheer him up.
'I see... Must be fun having so many friends. I only have Mahito' Choso mused leaning his back on the fence 'no, actually if that's how friendships work, then one friend is more than enough' he decided with a frown and Naoya smiled a little.
'I'm sure Mahito is just extra exhausting' he sighed and straightened up.
'Might be' Choso chuckled lightly.
'...You can consider me your second then...' Naoya mumbled quietly. After all, Choso was half human, and as far as Naoya knew, was actually a pretty decent person... He probably should have friends and normal life... It was a bit sad that he wasn't allowed to have any of it just because of the way he was born...
'I'll think about it' scratch that, he deserved as much hostility as the other curse.
'Forget it, I don't need assholes in my friend group'
'Right, you wouldn't want anyone to rival your position'
'You're getting snarkier by the day'
'That's how I treat my friends' Choso shrugged with a smile and then did something totally absurd, ruffled Naoya's hair 'Now if you stopped sulking let's go, our other friend is going to get lost in this park' Naoya should really, really feel humiliated by that weird head pat... The blush appearing on his face had to be a result of feeling humiliated, definitely...
'Mahito isn't my friend' he huffed but started walking to find him as Choso chuckled shortly beside him
Once they finished their walk through the park, Naoya decided to take them to a cafe before returning home. Usually he visited it alone, so it was surprisingly nice to enjoy it together with some almost friends. Even though Choso forced them both to look at photos his brother sent him. It really shook him the first time he saw photos of Choso's brothers. There was absolutely no resemblance. But at least he understood why Choso mentioned them not being able to live among humans. It was hard to imagine them having any sort of normal life if it wasn't for Choso fighting to let them enroll into Tokyo Jujutsu High School, now at least they had a chance of living with sorcerers who accepted their appearance. It seemed that principal Yaga took a liking to them.
In Naoya's opinion, Choso should've just abandoned them and focus on his own life, but he knew better than to say it outloud. Choso would definitely try to kill him for suggesting something like this. Mahito would probably help him just to be a spiteful little freak that he was.
Naoya sighed deeply as he laid down in his bed and stared at the photos from today. He really should find some actual human friends... But for now these two will do... He stared a little longer at one extremely good photo of Choso. The setting sun perfectly illuminating his profile and making him look even more gorgeous than normally. His expression so peaceful as he stared at a photo of his brother that you would never guess that Mahito was hanging on his shoulder and playing with his hair to get his attention.
Choso really was getting under Naoya's skin in ways he didn't even know were possible... The half curse was not only good looking but also had a strangely calming effect on people around him. He was still a bit annoying and rude, especially when fueled by Mahito's influence, but he also was surprisingly caring and gentle...
It was always reassuring to have Choso watch your back during missions, and sometimes he would even scold Mahito if he got too annoying. And when he went on a tirade about his little brothers and how much they meant to him, it was fun to look at Mahito and make barfing sounds in unison. All in all... This job wasn't so bad as of late...
So when he was informed about their next mission he was even almost a little bit happy to make his way to his friends' house. He was totally ready to beat up a curse with them and maybe later find an excuse to hang out and watch a movie together. Maybe some slasher horror so he could laugh with Mahito at all the kills, while Choso snores beside them. Yeah, that sounded fun... But when he entered their home he saw something he was not at all prepared to witness and all his plans for a fun evening disappeared.
His friends making out in the middle of their living room.