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“Nasir’s short,” Donar says bluntly to the camera in the tiny room they shove them in for their ‘diary entries.’ “I don’t know why the fuck he’s even here.”
“We can’t all be fucking mutants,” Nasir retorts, when it’s his own turn for a diary entry and the interviewer tells him what Donar has said. “I swear to god these assholes are all like seven feet tall. They don’t even fit in the fucking frame.”
“Donar’s just jealous,” Auctus tries, a few hours later, hearing the conversation through the interviewer. “Nasir scored really well on that last challenge – I mean, other than Crixus, hardly any of us speak another fucking language except Agron and Duro, and German’s not exactly sexy.”
-
“Seriously, French?” Agron growls, shoving the challenge card at Donar and stomping away. “The language that one of the guys here speaks and no one else does? That doesn’t seem rigged at all.”
“Someone just knows he’s gonna get his fucking pasty ass whooped,” Crixus crowed from the kitchen, making yet another disgusting protein shake and gunking up the blender, yet again.
“Clean that shit up,” Auctus advises over Crixus’ shoulder, ignoring the stewing argument. Crixus and Agron are obviously the house’s main source of entertainment and drama and the network isn’t subtle about shoving them into each other’s way. Even now, the cameras start circling closer, though the rest of the house ignores them.
“If I get my ass whooped it’s because there is something seriously fucked with the fact that this challenge involves us doing a commercial in French, your native fucking language – but don’t get too comfy you little shit, because I’m going to take you down,” Agron hisses before storming away, brushing past his little brother, who’s making a face at Auctus.
The cameras swerve away to focus on Crixus, who’s gloating to anyone who will listen.
“Hey,” Nasir grabs Agron’s elbow as he storms down the hall, and the cameras just barely catch the exchange. “I’m about to go for a run, bring Duro and I can help you out with some pronunciation stuff before tomorrow, okay?”
Agron stares at him and Nasir rolls his eyes with a sigh. “I speak French too, you asshole,” he says, his lips quirking into a smile. “I’m going to whoop all your asses tomorrow, but I might as well give you a fighting chance, okay?”
The fury writ into the lines of Agron’s face fades away somewhat and he looks sheepish. “Yeah, okay, meet you in five.”
-
“Yeaaah,” Nasir draws out the words hesitantly, biting his lip as he stares at the diary camera. “There might have been something happening?” His tone shifts idly between teasing and hesitation, not really answering the interviewer’s question. “I mean, Agron’s not really that subtle, but we haven’t really talked about what to call it.”
“No, we totally hooked up, like a week ago,” Agron says gleefully, leaning forward in his chair slightly. “Fuck, he is just really hot and I really like him.”
Duro sighs. “Agron’s gonna get his fucking heart stomped.”
-
“Those two are in the hot tub again,” Gannicus points out, looking more than a little interested. “Think they need a-”
“No,” Duro bites out firmly, settling his forehead against a kitchen cabinet. “Don’t talk to me about threesomes involving my brother, don’t reference sex involving my brother, don’t even point out that my brother may or may not be having sex as we speak. I don’t want to know.”
“Prude,” Gannicus snorts and picks up his drink and waltzes away, Duro turning to scowl after him.
Spartacus exits the gym and heads for the kitchen, a lazy cameraman strolling after him, disinterestedly watching him make a sandwich. “Want something Duro?” he asks, not even glancing at him.
“No thanks,” he mutters, muffled against the wood of the cabinet door. “Too grossed out.”
Spartacus smirks and hops up on the counter, taking a huge bite of sandwich. “Sure you’re not jealous?” he asks through a muffled mouthful.
“Of my brother?” Duro sounds like he might vomit. “Of Nasir having sex with Agron?”
“No, you fucker,” Spartacus says more clearly, after swallowing his bite. “Of the fact that all Agron thinks about anymore is Nasir. He’s not trailing after his little brother anymore.”
“That’s stupid,” Duro says, scowling, shoving his way out of the kitchen. “You’re stupid.” He slams his bedroom door in the cameraman's face.
-
“Duro’s fine,” Agron says, looking confused. “Why are you asking me about him? He’s doing just fine. He killed it in the last challenge, he’s always been good with the creepy reptile shit. Naevia finally stopped telling him to fuckin’ smile with his eyes or some shit.”
“One poor asshole was always going to have to pose with the alligator, while the rest of us got the snakes and spiders and turtles and shit,” Auctus said easily. “Better Duro than me.”
Duro shrugs. “The alligator was whatever.” He frowns. “Agron didn’t really say much to me after it though.” He made a face. “Too busy congratulating Nasir on posing with the spider. Like that shit’s even a little bit scary.”
-
“And the first pairing for this challenge will be…” Naevia intones dramatically and Duro tries not to roll his eyes.
“Crixus and Agron,” she said with some glee and Duro can already feel his brother tensing sharply beside him – but before he can punch him into silence, Nasir’s laying a calming hand on Agron’s shoulder and squeezing gently. Agron seems to settle back into his skin and Duro can’t hide the scowl on his face.
“The second pairing will be…” Naevia pauses again, and Duro fights the urge to throw something at her. “Duro and Nasir!”
Duro feels ill, but he pastes on a steady, blank face as he hears the news, ignoring Nasir peering curiously at him from the right.
“Lucky,” Agron grumbles as the last pair is announced and they’re allowed to go free. They star back down the hallways of the studio where all the stupid announcements are made, breaking off into single file and pairs. For the first time in a few days, Agron decides to walk with Duro. "Nasir's so good at that vintage shit."
“Yeah? I’m lucky to have him?” Duro says, his voice strained. “What about him, huh?” He can’t help the way his voice gets louder, can’t help how angry and frustrated he feels. “Isn’t he lucky to have me? I’m pretty fucking good at this Agron, but it’s like you forgot that we were here together because we need this, we need the money, we’re both here because we’re an amazing team – shit, the fucking second he showed up, it’s like I don’t fucking exist anymore,” he spits. “You can have him,” he snaps out. “I’d rather have Crixus than either of you.” He stomps away and the cameras can hardly keep up with him.
-
“I didn’t know he felt like that,” Agron says, after watching the footage again. “I didn’t have a fucking clue, which I guess is his point.” He shrugs his shoulders listlessly. “We’re usually so in tune, just on the same fucking wavelength all the time. Shit, I feel like crap. He won’t even talk to me anymore.”
Gannicus starts his diary out laughing. “Stupid fucking assholes, getting all worked up about nothing. So Agron’s getting a little tail outta this whole thing, who the fuck cares. Duro needs to man up and stop panting after his own fucking brother.”
Nasir shifts uncomfortably in his chair. “I really don’t want to have to be the one to fix this.”
-
“Hey,” Nasir knocks on Duro’s door after dinner. “Wanna have a strategizing session before tomorrow?”
“Not really,” Duro gets out, knowing he sounds like a petulant child. “But yeah, c’mon in. You can sit on Agron’s bed.” He successfully fights back the urge to say something about Nasir being familiar with it – but to be truthful, Agron’s been pretty respectful of Duro’s space, generally heading to Nasir’s for any evening activities.
“Thanks,” Nasir says with a relieved smile, settling in cross-legged on Agron’s bed, facing Duro. Duro hauls himself up and mimics Nasir’s pose, snatching up his notebook from the end of his bed. “So, I was thinking-"
Suddenly the door opens, and Agron falls in, looking absolutely wrecked. “Duro, I just wanna say-” He notices Nasir at the last moment, and Duro watches with twisted amusement as he fights the urge to light up like a moron. “Oh, I didn’t – sorry, I’ll just, we can talk later, right Duro?” He looks desperate and Duro pities him the slightest bit.
“Yeah,” he allows. “We’ll talk tonight.” Agron beams and stumbles back out of the room and there’s silence for a long second before Nasir starts snickering.
“He’s such a fucking goof,” he says, cracking up. “I’m sorry, but being his brother must be just the most ridiculous thing. I admire you so, so much.” Duro stared at him for a second before breaking into laughter himself.
“It’s not boring,” he snorts out, “I can tell you that.” They spend the next few minutes sharing ‘Agron-isms’ and trying not to cry with laughter.
“You’re not too bad,” Duro admits, flopping back onto his bed, missing Nasir’s grin.
“Yeah, you’re pretty okay yourself. Now c’mon, we’re gonna kick your brother’s ass on this one, all right? No other option.”
-
“That bullshit was magic,” Auctus complains. “Who the fuck knew those two had chemistry like that? Bullshit, so much bullshit.” He waves away the interviewer’s questions about there being something more between Duro and Nasir. “Nah, don’t get me started on that shit. Now that’s bullshit. Nasir's ass over ears for Agron and vice versa. And Duro's too fuckin' noble for that shit.”
“They were all right, but neither of them had to work with the fucking jerkoff Agron,” Crixus scowls. “So they had it easy.” He flips off the camera and ducks out of the diary room with a grunt.
“We were awesome,” Nasir says with pride, glancing over at Duro, who is settled onto the arm of the ‘diary’ chair. “Like, no one was fucking close to us.”
Duro snickers. “Agron’s face,” he adds, “was the funniest fucking thing.”
Suddenly, Agron crowds into the tiny room, pushing his way into frame, nearly shoving Duro off the chair. “Stop flirting with my boyfriend you asshole,” he says with a scowl, maneuvering his head between theirs and glaring at the camera. “And you,” he turns to Nasir, “Stop trying to steal my brother.” Duro cracks up and takes Nasir’s hand in his, simpering ridiculously.
“You wish you were as good as us, asshole.” The absolutely pathetic puppy eyes Agron gives them both just makes them crack up, oblivious to the interviewer’s attempts to reign them back in.
“Good luck with Crixus,” Nasir says helpfully and sends Duro into another peal of laughter.
“Hate you both,” Agron murmurs, managing a half grin despite his words, wrapping an arm around Duro’s neck and hugging him roughly, before pressing a firm kiss to Nasir’s forehead. “And someone help me kill that asshole before judging. If I have to hear the word smize again, I'm gonna fuckin' burn this shit down.”
