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A few samurai asked Penguin what was happening, and he said that it was an old custom from the North Blue where their captain was from, and it worked only if a native performed it. It was also important that nobody pay attention to it because that would mess up the whole thing.
Which was partially true, as their reputation would be over if they paid more attention to it. Penguin suddenly started craving some alcohol. But he was the unfortunate foul who was on Law-duty, so he had to be sober for both of them. The others laughed in his face and went back to partying. Those ungrateful little… Penguin won’t forget it. They will pay for it.
It could’ve been a really nice party though, he sighed silently.
They beat Kaido and freed Wano while managed to stay mostly in one piece. Considering most of the samurai thought it was a suicide mission it was an absolute miracle what they managed to do. But Penguin knew better. That miracle had a name, and it was Mugiwara no Luffy.
He was also the culprit who caused Penguin's migraine.
It all started a few hours ago when the party reached its peak.
Everyone was drinking and the everyone included Penguin’s crazy ass captain who was as insane as Mugiwara-san even though he desperately tried to deny it. But Penguin knew him since he was a murder-happy gremlin, so it was no use.
Anyway. His captain was drinking heavily, and if looks could kill the shinobi lady would be dead already though Penguin had no idea why Law suddenly started to hate her. Especially since he was such a nerd. Not that Penguin dared to say it out loud. Nonetheless, the facts were facts.
But Law was pretty wasted so Penguin gently it wasn’t his fault that he slipped a bit deposited him next to Marco the Phoenix, hoping that the older doctor could handle Law’s drunken medicine related ramblings. He was already pretty agitated muttering about Mugiwara-san unbelievable anatomy and about how he died? More than once?
Penguin carefully tucked that information away next to some other heavily Wano-related traumas he didn’t plan to touch even with a ten-foot pole and wanted to find Shachi to finally have some well-deserved alone time together.
And of course that was the time Mugiwara-san appeared. The captain with his iconic straw hat was perched on the shoulder of none other than the The First Son of the Sea, Jinbei, and looked more enthusiastic than usual. Penguin didn’t know how that was humanly possible, but he learned that questioning the things the younger captain did was no use.
“Hi, guys! Are you having fun?” That was what Mugiwara no Luffy probably tried to say, his mouth stuffed with a gigantic piece of meat, but Penguin didn’t spend years with Trafalgar “before my first cup of coffee I only communicate via grunts” Law for nothing.
The people around him cheered loudly while Law looked like he had eaten something sour and tried to hide his face with his cup.
“Oh, hi Torao!”
Rubbery hands grabbed Law’s heavily gauzed shoulder and really, Law should’ve known better. Penguin snickered but only quietly because he didn’t want to be on cleaning duty for the next few years.
“Mugiwara-ya, I have a name you know. And take your hand off me before I remove it from your body!”
“Shishishi, you’re so funny, Torao!”
“I’m not-”
The two captains continued their bickering, but Penguin tried to not pay them any attention. Law’s face looked way too funny, and Penguin’s well honed self-preservation instinct told him that he really had to not laugh right not. This was why he almost missed the crucial information which led to him to the deck of the Polar Tang while Law continued to pour salt in the water…
“I don’t believe you, Mugiwara!”
Eustass “Captain” Kid screeched which was in Penguin’s humble opinion a pretty lame thing to do, especially if you were a captain but who was he to question a captain? (Only a first mate to a much more awesome captain who was one of the leaders of the alliance which beat Kaido, but he was just a humble person… And his captain didn’t need to make “captain” his middle name just to ensure that people knew who he was…) But back to the point.
“Jinbei, you’re really joined to this idiot?”
Jinbei nodded calmly but his new (?) captain wasn’t that reserved.
“Shut up, Jaggy! He’s mine!”
Penguin watched with mild interest as Mugiwara no Luffy and Eustass “Captain” Kid started to fight with each other. Though none of them took it too seriously, other people also joined them and soon it devolved into a brawl. He felt that after this whole ordeal (and what he heard about Dressrosa) there was nothing Mugiwara no Luffy could do which will surprise him. After all, it was a well-known fact that the young captain tended to collect simply insane and/or insanely strong people like others – khm, Law – collected golden coins. So what if Mugiwara no Luffy wanted an ex-shichibukai, ex-pirate captain, ex-underling of another Yonko in his crew? Especially one who saved his life during the whole shitshow called Summit War of Marienford and oh…
Law and Jinbei shared a few similarities with each other. And Mugiwara no Luffy seemed to like Penguin’s captain already.
Penguin caught the exact moment when Law also had the same train of thoughts as he. He was also sure that they arrived at a slightly different conclusion.
What if?
What if he actually liked Law and wanted to have him around even after achieving their goal?
What if he wanted Law to abandon his position as a captain and join his crew too?
The first one was the only right conclusion if Penguin could say so.
But Law was already a paranoid bastard (“It’s not paranoia if they are really after you, Penguin.”) and currently he was also very-very drunk.
Which led to the current situation.
Penguin stood in the deck of the Polar Tang and watched as Law continued to pour salt in the sea. He still desperately wanted to have a drink. Although the living example was right in front of his nose why it was probably a bad decision.
Law was really wasted if he turned to witchcraft, Penguin mused. But his captain was a nerd at heart, so it wasn’t as extreme as it sounded.
Still, Penguin really wanted to point out that even if Mugiwara no Luffy wanted Law to be part of his crew, it was not like a few bags of salt would stop him. He gave his moronic captain a bit of credit because salt circles were really used by believing folks in order to create a protective barrier against all kinds of supernatural things. And a devil fruit user could be considered as a “supernatural thing” without doubt.
Still.
Law himself was a devil fruit user, and the salt didn’t affect him at all.
He was also an atheist. (Or an agnostic, Penguin never really pried into this particular matter.)
Moreover, they were on the fucking sea so it wasn’t like he could make a proper salt circle.
But Penguin knew better than to argue with a drunken Law. He was often like a feral kitten, even sober but when he was drunk it was worse. Sometimes Penguin and Shachi – while wasted like Akagami no Shanks after one of his parties – argued with each other whether caring for their feral captain could make them eligible keeping a pet or not. (If they could take care of an insomniac, picky-eater, obsessive gremlin, then a normal kitten or some other pet would be a simple step.)
Instead, he just handed another bag to his idiot captain little brother and contemplated which would be better: if Law would remember this whole ordeal tomorrow or not.
