Chapter Text
Sunday had been on the Astral Express for over three weeks now. Over that time, He had…slowly gotten used to a large amount of expectations had to stay here. To be frank, he was getting used to how few there were. The first time he was tasked with cleaning a room he actually got scolded for doing too much! Scolded!
It was strange.
But awfully freeing.
It reminded him of the times before Gopher Wood. Before Penacony. Of his mother. Of Robin.
However, that didn’t stop the…negatives of the situation. Cleaning was how he felt sane at this point. It had become a source of normalcy. A sense of faith. Sunday only had a small guest closet to stay in, so he couldn’t even clean his own space, yet alone clean it enough for his sense of normalcy. He didn’t like dirt. He didn’t like dust. The Express didn’t mind it as much as he did, but he didn’t think they liked it either. They didn’t seem to be wracked with the guilt he was whenever he didn’t feel like a task was accomplished , and they always pulled him away before he could feel concluded. Fretting that he was spending too much energy on little things, saying that he needed rest and to give his hands a break. It made him nauseous.
So he’s been coming out in the middle of the night to clean. When only PomPom is awake, they had already reached an agreement there. PomPom liked it being clean, and Sunday needed to clean. He had made them promise not to tell the others, insisting that it was easier this way. He didn’t like to make waves. He felt like he was intruding on a family who are perfectly fine without him. Like he was being adopted all over again. He felt more accepted and forgiven in this grouping than he had ever felt with his Father, but he still felt like he would lose it all. Like it was never his to begin with. Nor was he really confident that he would be allowed to stay.
If he gets everything perfect, He won’t lose them yet. Five scrubs each tile. Eight swipes each blind. Ten seconds every soak. He was even using THEIR power to silence the volume of the vacuum, so he could go through the floor, every cushion, every chair; 3 times, without waking the crewmembers. If he was perfect, if he was silent; everything would be fine! THEY had never led him astray before. Only his Father did.
“Sunday?”
“Fuck! ” He jumped. He was so focused on getting every spot on this chair that he didn’t realize the new addition to the room. “I apologize if I woke you-”
“Sunday, It’s 5am.” Welt had his head tilted to the side, eyebrow raised. “What in the aeons above, are you doing awake?”
“I didn’t realize..” He shook his head. He didn’t finish the section before he turned around. He would have to start all over again. He swiftly put his hands behind his back, repeatedly pressing every finger against his thumb, counting in quarter beats to the number of eight. If he keeps it going, it will all be fine. He shook his wings out to the side, ignoring the wrench in his stomach when a tiny feather fell off towards the ground. “I just..”
He didn’t have a lie prepared. He didn’t think ahead. Even THEY couldn’t save him now. He was so tired, So disorganized, that he didn’t even think; Hey! Someone might catch you! What an idiot he was.
It was all gonna fall apart. The best opportunity he could have ever been granted is squandered already. This was his punishment for not fixing this all earlier. For not being more efficient. Surely THEY saw how poorly he was managing all of this and decided his future for him. He lied. He was keeping this all from them. They would hate him.
He had to focus on his hands again. Air in, Air out, 5, 6, 7, 8.
He’s too silent. Sunday can’t bear to move to look Welt in the eyes. In fact, his wings had moved to cover his own.
“I-I couldn’t sleep.”
“While I know that is true,” Welt sighed. He had given the wrong answer. He couldn’t stop his heart from panicking. From his body, mind, and spirit assuming the incoming punishment. “I also know that is not the whole truth. Are you still experiencing some adverse effects from leaving Penacony?”
“No.” He lied. A day hasn’t gone by without him feeling sick, Without the sensation of water on his limbs making him black out, without him having to count to 1000 to even be able to shut his eyes to sleep. He already felt like too much of a burden. Father would always come up with a fitting punishment every time he got sick. For every day passed, he would be hit. For every event missed, a feather would be pulled. His heart felt like it was going to rip out of his ribcage. His limbs felt slow and weak, the bags under his eyes heavy. “Well, unless you count my insomnia.”
“I don’t.” Welt adjusted his glasses, taking a step forward and crossing his arms. Sunday felt his entire body start to tremble in fear. He did not move. He could not move. “I also know you’re lying. Care to enlighten me?”
“Mister Yang,” Sunday cleared his throat, swallowing hard. He was a grown man. He had gone to, albeit religious, therapy before. He felt incredibly guilty just thinking about the concept of overstepping on this train. Becoming a burden? Asking for more than bare necessities? Aeons above, he would rather throw himself out the window. He already asked enough of them by stepping foot here. He doesn’t deserve it. “I’m fine. You really don’t need to bother with the formalities of checking in on me. I’m asking enough just staying here. I just like cleaning.”
“Sunday, Forgive me, But you look awful.” Welt gestured with one hand. Sunday had moved his wings slowly down, covering his cheeks more than his eyes at this point. “I’d rather not find you on the floor, So how about you sit down, I make some tea, and we talk . I don’t view this as a formality, So surely you can sit down and let me hear you out.”
“...Hear me out?”
“Or; I’ll tell the others.” Sunday’s eyes widened, tilting his head.
“You wouldn’t already?”
“Not without a chance of explanation, No.” Welt shook his head, hand now pointing to the couch. At least it was clean. “I don’t see why I would. It doesn’t harm anybody to let you clean. I am, however, worried that you are going to burn yourself out at an astronomical rate. You should be resting extra to accommodate the change from the Dreamscape still.”
“Okay.” Sunday took three deep breaths, but slowly walked to sit on the couch. He was fine. He wasn’t in trouble. Yet. He just needed to cover up how ill he had been feeling. A slow build up of constant nausea, hot flashes, and dizzy spells. Then he wouldn’t be punished. He couldn’t be. Father was long gone. He should be letting go of how these things feel by now.
“Good. I’ll get the tea. Admittedly, I already had the kettle going for myself.” Welt spoke as he walked away, slowly falling out of view.
Sunday took another three deep breaths. He put his arm on the table and leaned on his hand, looking at the other in his lap. He still had his left hand doing his finger trick. A funnel for all of the nervous energy that had been building up the last five minutes. He was a grown man, who felt disgusting to even be this emotional and dependent on someone who, objectively, should want him dead. His wings were quivering while attempting to cover his face. He hated them sometimes. They always gave him away.
He hated this overwhelming bundle of nerves he was becoming. Every time he got like this he felt sick to his stomach. That combined with the already hard to handle nausea; the only thing stopping him from gagging was the paralyzing fear of the concept. He deserved this torment. He didn’t finish the chair. He didn’t finish his dream. He didn’t stop people from being hurt. He hurt Robin. He hurt the express crew. He hurt everyone.
He wondered if he should feel guiltier over not thinking Xipe would care about his traitory, or if he should feel guilty for even considering that THEY would care about something as little and small as him. It might just be both.
When he goes to bed he will pray an extra 3 times. He can atone. That is the beauty of Xipe. He can feel that relief. Everything was fine when he prayed. He really missed the confession booth.
“Here you go.” Welt had already returned, sliding a cup of his homemade chamomile based anxiety reducing tea across the table. He had put a little bit of vanilla in it to make it a bit sweeter, Sunday could tell just by the smell. Had he really taken care enough to notice he liked that?
Of course he did. Welt was wonderful. He felt his stomach knot again for even doubting that.
He sat up straighter, Removing his arm from the table to slowly reach out for the cup with his hand, taking a small sip.
“So…And please speak honestly, Sunday.” He wanted to curse in a million languages for that one. He hated lying enough already. He felt better not having heard him flat out say it. He felt like no matter what he lost, at this point. “Are you doing alright?”
“Could I ask you something, First?” Sunday cleared his throat. The only way he could think of surviving this conversation was to get something off of his brain. He needed just one promise for everything to not go to shit. Maybe he could be honest then. He felt…terrible. “Please.”
“What is it?” Welt either saw the urgency in Sunday’s body language, or he was taking pity.
“Promise me that this conversation, things I have been keeping, anything I admit will not cost me my privilege of staying here.” Sunday took a breath, hands now both counting again in his lap. “It’s nothing creepy or anything like that I just-”
He took a deep breath.
“I need to hear you say it. I believe.”
“Sunday, I promise that you sharing what is burdening you will not jeopardize anything relating to do with the Astral Express, In any way shape or form.”
Welt looked oddly soft in that moment. That was something Sunday had noticed very quickly. He was incredibly paternal, in a very..soft and delicate way. He was goofy, and loving in most of what he did. He was also forgetful, and a bit of a nerd. Himeko had told Sunday that the last time she had seen Welt as ‘fretful’ was when Dan Heng had just joined the crew. Stelle was largely cared for by March and Dan Heng themselves, when she was adjusting. It was incredibly healing to experience, if he was to be frank, but..new. Very new. He didn’t know how to handle it, accept it, or digest it.
“I’m just concerned about how you’re doing. This in no way will come with any consequences, Unless you count a potential doctor's visit and mandatory sleep as consequences.”
“Thank you.” Sunday sighed, a lot more relief going through his body then he expected. His wings were still trembling, he was still freaked out, but..his stomach felt a little looser.
“No. I’m honestly doing pretty terrible.” He kept his eyes down at his hands. Shifting in his lap. His wonderful protective gloves soften any incoming sensation. The perfect amount. “It’s a lot to explain. I’m very tired. It’s either a really long conversation or none at all, I think. It’s not exactly sunshine and rainbows either.”
“I can handle a really long conversation.” Welt chuckled. “You have no idea what everyone’s stories are. If the other side is sunshine and rainbows, our side is tropical storms and black holes. So far, I haven’t had to convince you that your past life’s ex husband isn't in the express and trying to kill you, or that you are not a nuke going to explode. Don’t worry about me. Just talk.”
“Well..Okay. Yeah. Fair enough.” Sunday sighed, wings finally relaxing, settling to droop down next to his head. “I believe I already told you that I was an orphan. As was Robin. We don’t remember our father, but our mother was..amazing. She died protecting us. Gopher Wood adopted us after that.”
“I do remember that, yes.”
“To be honest, my memory isn't very reliable during that time.” He cleared his throat. “I was young, and the only thing I cared about was Robin. Protecting her was my life mission, I don’t remember much else.”
“Makes sense.”
“But in all of my memories, Father was…strict.” Sunday’s wings flipped twice. “I couldn’t get sick, I had to pray perfectly, Perfect grades, Perfect attendance to everything, Meanwhile I was already taking care of big projects in Penacony by the time I was 16. I was forced to be a certain way essentially my entire life. Or I'd get..punished. My two wing piercings? Not aesthetics. He did that to me for neglecting my duties. Two for two missed events. They're meant to be permanent clips.”
“That’s..awful, Sunday.”
“I’m sure you have noticed that Robin has a large pair of wings she can manifest, have you not?”
“Yes. Stelle was curious, Even, but I insisted she did not ask.”
“My wings were severed. Terribly severed. I essentially have a life long disability because of such. In the Dreamscape, I could soothe it constantly. Now that I’m back in reality, I will slowly and slowly become more burdened by the pain in my back. I was never able to see if I could get it..solved, somehow.” Sunday chuckled to himself. “To be honest, This is the most time I’ve been outside of the Dream since I was 7. I haven't even seen my back in over a decade. My body doesn’t know how to handle being awake, or walking around, or the huge fuck up of still having wing bones in my back. In captivity at least I was chained to a chair the entire time.”
“That sounds incredibly painful.” Welt’s eyes were a little wide. “And neglectful. And abusive.”
“I am aware.” Sunday sighed, slouching a bit into the couch. He picked up the cup for another sip. “I have spent the last year, pretty much reflecting on how..shit he was. He ruined me. Manipulated me. The array of issues I have solely because of him is..intense. If not for Robin’s insistence and ever-going presence in my life; I believe I would have never reflected. I still have a multitude of hold ups in this regard, No matter how much I attempt to remove them.”
He placed the cup back down. Deciding to tap his fingers against the cup in a rhythm now instead.
“I have been diagnosed with OCD, PTSD, and Insomnia. I had a diagnostic test for ADHD and Autism before everything went down but I was unable to reschedule due to the whole ‘being in prison and a fugitive’ aspect of it all. I am currently not medicated. I have to wait a full year outside of the Dreamscape before I can partake in a sleep study, Which is really the only thing I can do to help figure my health out. I detest doctor’s, So even that was…a lot for me. Besides physical therapy. I do genuinely like cleaning, I assure you I do, but…”
“But it’s also a compulsion.” Welt concluded, his face softening visibly as many dots seemed to connect in his head. “No wonder you sneak out to clean. Everyone keeps pulling you from your routine, don't they?”
“Yes. I have a bit of a problem not..listening in a lot of scenarios.” He took a deep sigh. “Especially in this one. So I found a solution!”
“I don’t think staying up all night is a solution, Sunday.” Welt shook his head gently, gesturing with his left hand. “It’s self-sacrificial. We can just let you do your routine. It’d be quite easy to accommodate, While still being fair in your workload. How often are you up this late?”
“Are you..sure?” Sunday swallowed, his wings momentarily starting to shake. “I am usually out here ranging until around.. 3am to 4am. It’s slowly getting later. I typically don’t fall asleep until 5 or 6. If I fall asleep.”
“You’re always up by 8am, Sunday! No wonder you look so terrible. I wouldn’t be shocked if you got hospitalized soon, With how little sleep you have been getting.” Welt looked incredibly worried, and incredibly disappointed. It must be a lot worse than he thought. Sunday’s stomach felt like an anchor had dropped inside of him. “How are you physically feeling?”
Sunday’s wings started full on quivering at that, his eyes quickly averting to look at his hands full focus. He didn’t even seem to notice his wings this time.
“Awful.” He felt like he had a massive lump in his throat. “Really awful. Constantly nauseous. Incredibly dizzy. My throat has been incredibly dry, I’ve been freezing and fatigued. I’ve thrown up uh- a lot. Passed out a few times. I think. I’m honestly not really- fully sure.”
“Sunday!” Welt looked shocked. His hands gestured out in a exacerbated way, and that caused Sunday to flinch and his breathing to hitch. He immediately seemed to notice, putting his hands down on the table with one slightly reaching towards the other. He started speaking in a much softer voice. “I’m sorry. I’m not upset with you, I’m simply frustrated you haven't told any of us. Or at the very least asked to see a doctor, Even with your hold-ups.”
“I felt too guilty even pondering the idea.” Sunday admitted, his arms now having retreated back to his body, although he was now looking at Welt’s hands. “I’m incredibly sorry. I didn’t want to be a hassle. I still don’t. I’ve already been given so much. I should be fully capable of taking care of myself and staying out of trouble.”
“I understand. And I think I get why you believe that.” He didn’t move his hands, but he did lean forward slightly. “You aren’t a burden on us. You sleep in a closet, You clean up more than everyone else, You are incredibly polite and a fantastic aid in almost everything you’ve done so far. We are the ones who should be accommodating you more, Sunday. Besides that, we take care of each other here. It’s something we care very strongly about. I think you deserve that care. I really do. I just want to be able to give it.”
Halovian’s are especially sensitive to emotion. Empathy was a necessary tool in their development at some point in the generational line; To the point where there is mandatory training for those with extra sensitivity. Sunday and Robin both fell under that description. While Father never allowed such to occur, As an adult Sunday was able to learn enough to help alleviate. Even then, Sunday has always been a crybaby. Even over nonsensical things, tears were his body's immediate reaction. While he excelled at crying, He was horrible at doing so in front of others. Robin being, as always, the only exception.
Sunday couldn’t tell if it was the sleep deprivation, the exhaustion, the fever, or all of the above that caused that to instantly make him sob. But something inside of him aided it in giving way. Before he knew it he had one hand covering his mouth as his shoulders shook, tears already starting to dampen his glove and occasionally drip onto his pants. His wings curled to try to hide his eyes, but were drooped a little too low to do much to help. He couldn’t even attempt to talk. Every time he opened his mouth the most embarrassingly loud sob and hiccup harmony escaped his lips. It sounded like a chirp.
“...Would you appreciate a hug?”
It was embarrassing how fast he nodded. Welt didn’t take much time to stand up and sit right next to Sunday on the opposite side of the couch. His right hand went to the back of his head, Pulling his face directly into his shoulder, as the other wrapped his arms around his torso. It was a few minutes of Welt rubbing his back as he loudly sobbed, feeling with drastic concern at just how warm his skin felt. Eventually though, the sobs slowed. His breathing evened out. Sunday didn’t exactly know what to do, But he knew it was helping. That was enough for the moment. Even if his head was screaming to push him away.
“I’m sorry.” Sunday sniffed, pulling away slightly to rub at his eyes. “I don’t know why I- I. I didn’t mean to break down like that.”
“It’s okay. I’m happy to help.” Welt nodded, one hand still rubbing the other’s back. But he did take the opportunity to put his wrist on the other’s forehead. It was even hotter. “Would you let me take your temperature? Have you taken it recently?”
“It was 100 this morning.” Sunday mumbled. “Yesterday morning, I mean.”
“I’ll be right back.” Welt ruffled the top of Sunday’s head, walking over to a storage cabinet nearby that had a medical kit inside. He quickly found the thermometer and was already walking back towards the couch and handing it to him. “I do think I have to inform the crew about you not feeling well. I can spare as many details as you need about everything else. I know that wasn’t everything going on.”
“Thank you. I understand.” Sunday put the thermometer under his tongue, trying very hard to keep it perfectly on the vein.
“I hope you will feel comfortable talking about more with me in the future. The door is always open.” Welt spoke softly, not averting his gaze from the tiny screen. “It's protocol whenever anyone gets sick that it's all hands on deck. No matter who it is. No one will be upset with you, I assure you. Is the temperature range for Halovians the same as typical humans?”
Sunday nodded. After a few seconds there were three tiny beeps, and Sunday was handing it over to Welt. He didn’t even bother to look at it himself.
“Shit.” Welt’s eyes were wide. “103.6.”
“Oh..”
“Alright, For now I want you to rest down here, Okay?” He paused until Sunday nodded, although he looked a little embarrassed. It just worsened how already flushed his cheeks were. He pulled out a blanket from nearby, handing it over to the other. “I’m going to go wake Himeko, and notify PomPom. We might need to ask a few questions about how to get you proper care in a few minutes.”
“I apologize for the hassle.” Sunday quickly took the blanket and wrapped it around himself. “Thank you.”
As Welt walked, he quickly pulled out his phone and went into the original Astral Express crew group chat. The one without Sunday. Thankfully, it looked like two members were already awake.
-Welt has come online-
Welt: I apologize in advance for texting so early in the morning.
Welt: Sunday has a fever of 103.6, His other symptoms seem fairly severe, but I do not know the full details quite yet
Welt: I would appreciate it if everyone could be delicate. He hasn’t been sleeping much
Dan Heng: That’s a very high fever. Is there anything I can do right now?
Welt: I don’t know quite yet. I’m on my way to wake Himeko right now so we can get on top of getting a doctor to come see him.
Stelle: oof
Stelle: he can sleep in my bed. I know his room is tiiinyy and his bed sucks
Stelle: plus i have a motherlode of blankets and a bath would probably help
Stelle: i could put on robins music and everything. cozy it the hell up in here
Welt: That sounds wonderful, Stelle. Would you be ready to expect us in around ten minutes?
Stelle: yea
Welt: I’ll let you guys know if we need anything else. He did say that yesterday morning his fever was only 100, So it might not be at its worst yet.
-Welt has gone offline-
Welt was already in front of Himeko's door. He knocked three times with his knuckles, pushing his glasses back on his nose. It was around five seconds until he was told to just come in. He quickly opened the door and entered, Himeko sitting up in bed and rubbing her eyes.
“What’s wrong?”
“Sunday has a fever of 103.6.” He watched as her eyes widened, now quickly tossing her blankets off of her and stepping into her slippers. “I know we talked about our concerns a few nights ago. I cannot fully embellish, but..he did talk to me. Opened up a bit. I believe we need to be pretty delicate in taking care of him. Alongside redoing our chores schedule.”
“Alright.” Himeko yawned, stretching her back as she turned to face him. “What’s our game plan?”
“Stelle offered up her room for his recovery, So I would like to get him into her bed and comfortable. Check if he's actually digested anything, Get him some water, and then try to see if we can get a doctor in to see him today.” He stepped outside of the door and held it open for her. “I think we should text Robin for some insider info, as well. It would be a lot easier than trying to quiz Sunday on typical Halovian care.”
“I can do that. I need to make myself some coffee anyways. If he’s opening up with you, It’s more logical for you to take the lead, I believe.” Himeko walked with Welt towards the main car, Nodding to him as he opened the door in thanks. He agreed with her with a small smile. “I’ll meet you in Stelle’s room?”
Welt did not know nearly enough about Halovians as he needed to. If he could internally kick himself for not preparing for something like this, He would. Sunday was not someone who would openly admit his misgivings. He’s prideful, and Stubborn, even if his genuine demeanor was passive and gentle. He should have looked into more specific signs. The closeness he had earlier gave him a lot of inquiries he was desperate to look into. His feathers did not seem healthy. He had no muscular toning despite being a busybody. His skin was pale and despite his effort to conceal it; his eye bags were terrible. He couldn’t tell if Sunday was even cognizant of how much he was shaking. Of how his back seemed to buckle in a way that could only be described as disturbing.
It gave him even more questions the more he thought about it. He said he detests doctors, So is that a sign of medical abuse? Or just medical neglect?
Were there multiple forms of Halovians? Him mentioning his wings gave him inclinations in his head. His wings were cruelly cut off. Did he ever get them investigated? Inspected? Does he actually go to a proper doctor? Has he ever gone to a proper doctor?
Welt returned to find Sunday patiently waiting for him to return. He seemed to finish the cup of tea while he was gone, but was shivering inside the blanket. Sunday had given up trying to seem put together and well completely, which is either a sign of him getting sicker and sicker; or he just didn’t see the point anymore. He couldn’t tell himself, to be honest.
“Stelle is giving you her bed for a while, So whenever you’re ready, We should get you set up there.” Welt gave him a gentle smile. “Did you like the tea? I can make you some more.”
“That’s very nice of her. I am alright for now, but..maybe in a bit?” Sunday swallowed, standing up as fast as he seemed to be able. His face quickly lost multiple shades of color. He grimaced as he extended his wings and moved one hand to his forehead, with the other instinctively going out to try to balance himself. It wasn’t working. In around five seconds, his knees buckled and he toppled forward. Luckily, Welt caught him immediately.
Welt couldn’t help but notice that Sunday’s halo spun and rapidly lit up when it happened. He had always noticed how Halovian eyes are distinctly different; much more sensitive to things then typical human’s. Robin’s seemed to function a lot less sharply then Sunday’s did. His was frantic, And typically startled. They zoned in and out fast, and never seemed to settle unless they were hidden. Did Sunday hide how his halo reacts? Is that possible? He was able to sever it from himself in the dreamscape, Can he do that outside of the land of memoria?
How badly did his experience with memoria shape him? Is this just that?
“Himeko,” Welt grunted as he moved to support Sunday’s weight, Opting to slowly kneel on the floor and gently lower him so he was leaning against his leg. “Could you text Dan Heng to come help me out, Please?”
“Will do!” Himeko was already on her phone, So she had it done within ten seconds. “I’ll bring a bowl and a washcloth up once my coffee is done. Robin is awake, Thankfully, So I’m going to get a good list while I already have her attention.”
“That's great. Thank you.”
“What’s the matter?” Dan Heng rushed through the door, darting over to their sides the second he saw where they were. “What do you need?”
“He fainted. I should be able to carry him, But I’ll need help with clearing the path. I also want to make a bit of a gameplan with everyone awake, Once we’ve gotten him settled.” Welt placed his hand on Sunday’s cheek to check in on his temperature again, not happy to notice his skin is somehow hotter yet again. He moved, placing one arm under his knees and the other under his back. Slowly lifting him into the air, and making sure he's leaning against his chest. Dan Heng simply nodded, wordlessly walking to open the door and ensure the path was clear. Once they hit the party car, Sunday’s eyes slowly blinked open. His pupils darted in and out until they landed on Welt’s face. Then they settled on being dilated for a moment. His wings also seemed to flutter for a moment, and he could feel a physical restraint in a reaction.
“Um.” Sunday mumbled, lifting his head fully and noticing Dan Heng leading their way. “Oh. I passed out.”
“You sure did. Are you feeling alright?” Welt slightly readjusted as he brought Sunday up the stairs.
“I’ll be fine. I think I just stood up too fast.” He sighed. “My apologies. I can wa-”
“It’s fine.” Welt squeezed him gently, before finally walking into Stelle’s room, the door already open awaiting their arrival. Stelle had already pulled the blankets off in an easy way for Welt to place Sunday on the bed without him having to move to get settled. Sunday’s wings were covering his face again. Welt could see the outline of his golden eye’s settling under the feathers.
Aeons above did he feel guilty. He understood that everyone got this treatment, but..it did not stop the churning evergoing in his stomach.
“How you feeling, Sunny?” Stelle asked with a small mischievous smile.
“I’ve been better.” He could not hide his irritation. She has continued to not let it go. Not one missed opportunity. “I would appreciate it if you stopped referring to me by that in the future.”
“Mm. Maybe.” She walked over to her desk nearby, turning on her personal phonograph to Robin’s newest album. “You have pajamas in your room, Right? Want me to grab em?”
“You do not have to,” His wings flapped nervously as Welt pulled three different blankets on top of him, as Dan Heng was clearing off Stelle’s nightstand. “I appreciate the offer, though.”
“I don’t have to, but I want to.” Stelle shook her head, before nodding over to Welt and heading out the door. “I’ll be right back.”
“Alright, Well..” Welt sat down on the bed, crossing his legs and putting his hands on his knee. “First, Sunday, When was the last time you had some water? Have you managed to keep anything down?”
“Dinner. And nothing really in..two days?” He mumbled, now strumming his fingers against his own bicep. The longer he talked, the more horse his throat felt. The true honesty is that everytime he ate he felt like a sinner. Gluttony was never allowed in Father’s home. “That isn’t uncommon for me, Though.”
“Dan Heng, Could you?” He was already moving before he had the chance to finish his sentence. He looked back over to Sunday. “Okay. We’re going to have you drink some water and then rest for a bit. I’ll have some simple soup made. You really should take a bath, and while that happens we’ll figure out how fast we can get a doctor in. Himeko already contacted Robin so we can make sure all bases are covered.”
“Oh. Okay.” He blinked a few times, taking a deep breath. Aeons above, this was embarrassing. Sunday, at his grown age, having to say he can’t take a bath alone. It was shameful. He hadn’t received help in hygiene since he was 6. “I uh..”
“What is it?”
“I am having difficulties with certain symptoms from being in The Dream for so long..” He coughed, wings tucking in closer to his face to cover it. “Every time I’ve been touching water I pass out. Especially in a bath. I really really would like to get clean, I already feel guilty being this gross in Miss Stelle’s bed, But..I…”
“If it’s a problem, I will help. I believe not drowning is more important than privacy, In this case.” He shook his head like it was obvious. “We can hold off until it's urgent. I largely suggested the idea to bring down your temperature. Have you been able to shower?”
“Very quickly, Yes.” It’s a huge part of why he’s been so focused on cleaning. He couldn’t even clean himself properly. He had already hurt his back in the shower this..yesterday morning.
“Ah.” He sighed, taking a second to rub the bridge of his nose. Dan Heng walked over and handed the cup to Sunday, then standing off to the side and pulling out his phone. “Once you’ve rested a bit, I’ll want to get a full list of your symptoms. That way we can try to make the doctor's visit as short as possible.”
“Alright.” Sunday nodded, his wings slowly peeling away from his face. He was looking up at Welt with a very..vulnerable expression. His pupils dilated. Blinking twice. “Thank you.”
“Don’t mention it.” Welt smiled, turning his head as Stelle’s door opened yet again, Himeko and Stelle both entering with a very sleepy March behind them. Dan Heng walked right over to the two youngins, Clearing up the area so Himeko could place the bowl on the nightstand. “Right on time.”
“I would’ve been here sooner but March woke up and delayed me a bit.” She put the washcloth into the bowl, fully soaking it in the water. “Sunday, How are you feeling? Could you lay back for me?”
“I’ve been better.” Sunday replied yet again, his favorite go-to downplay to relieve his overwhelming guilt. He did immediately move the pillows around him to allow him to lean back, not particularly wanting to be fully horizontal if he could help it. He extended his wings out and laid them to rest, silently hoping the water did not drench his feathers. He couldn’t put that on them. Not like this.
“Sounds about right.” She rang the washcloth out and then folded it, gently placing it onto Sunday’s forehead and smoothing it out with her hand. He winced a little at first, but very quickly it turned into an incredibly relieving sensation. “I talked with Robin. She wanted me to tell you to text her when you can, Okay? She’s also going to try to free up a day to come visit.”
“I will. Thank you. I appreciate it.” Sunday had to swallow to avoid choking up at that. He patted his pockets to discover his phone wasn’t on him. “I don’t seem to have my phone. I hate to ask, But could someone..?”
“I’ll fetch it for you.” Himeko smiled, gently putting a hand on Welt’s shoulder as she walked back out of the room. March, Dan Heng, and Stelle were all in a very deep hushed conversation, with only March looking over at Sunday and giving him a small wave. He returned it. She then returned back to the convo, Shortly after shoving Stelle towards the bed with the pajamas still in her hand.
“We’re going to head out to give you a bit of space.” She placed the neatly folded clothes on the bench in front of her bed. Then she gave him a bit of an awkward wave. “We’ll all have our phones on in case you need anything, Okay? Everything in my fridge is free range. If you get bored I can show you how to set up the TV. I have a super good phone charger set up for whenever you need it. Oh and uh- Trashcake is a snuggler.”
“Thank you, Miss Stelle. I appreciate it. I do not deserve your hospitality.” He looked over towards the nearby couch, admiring the little guy taking a very big nap. “I don’t mind. I’ve never had much of an opportunity to interact with any of the catcakes. Just heard stories.”
“Okay. Well. Don’t be scared to call us. Rest up.” Stelle gave him a thumbs up, and then walked out. Dan Heng and March both gave waves as they walked out the door. He then returned his gaze towards Welt.
“You don’t have to be nearly as formal with us, Sunday.” He moved to be fully facing towards him. “You’re our friend. Even if you don’t stay and Trailblaze with us officially, You are still considered one of us. At least to me.”
“I’m sorry.” He chuckled, now letting his hands fidget in his lap under the blankets. He only felt colder as time went on. He didn’t mention that he had never had friends before. That that was a new term for him completely. “It’s a bit of a habit. I don’t intend to be rude or ungrateful.”
“I assumed. None of us have taken any offense. I just..wanted to specify.” He reached over and felt the washcloth, Grimacing slightly as he felt it was already hot. He pulled the cloth off and redid the earlier actions. Sunday sighed in relief this time. “I’m sorry if you didn’t enjoy being carried. I didn’t think to wait to make sure you were comfortable with it. I should have.”
“Thank you for thinking of my comforts at all. It was fine. I would’ve done the same.” He took a hand out to grab his glass of water again, Taking a few sips and using his other hand to keep the cloth in place. “Did you. Did you mean that?”
“Mean what?”
“That you consider me..one of you?” He put the glass back and laid back into the pillows. He let his eyes settle on his hands.
“I do.” He nodded, looking forward towards Stelle’s various decorations. “I don’t think I’m alone in it either. You fit in a lot more than you seem to believe.”
Sunday didn’t say anything. He didn’t have any idea what to say. What was being a friend, Really?
“I believe you’ll find a lot of fulfillment in trailblazing. If I remember correctly, the others were thinking of bringing you to Belobog. It’s quite cold, but a very good showing of what we do best.” He continued. He didn’t seem to be bothered by the lack of reply. “Trailblazing means something different to all of us, Yet it's unified in experience. We all have different goals.”
“Belobog?” Sunday directed his gaze towards Welt’s face again. His vision was a bit too blurry to read his expression. He couldn’t tell if the tears welling in his eyes were from the fever or just this converstion. Another downside to his emotionally digestion issues.
“Jarillo 6. You’d like it there. I’ll save the story for them. I wasn’t a part of that mission directly.” He looked back over, Giving a gentle smile. “It’s a world you'd find a lot of hope in.”
“I. I see.” He blinked a few times. “I didn’t think you’d think of it that far.”
“I don’t see why I wouldn’t.”
“Why are you so..” He paused for a moment. His wings twitched slightly, before resuming to laying flat. “Nice. To me?”
“I have multiple reasons. I think your heart is in one of the most correct places I’ve seen in a long while. You’re kind. You’re considerate. You’ve endured a lot and have tried to use it to push you forward. You’re incredibly self sacrificial. I did, and do, Genuinely mean that you are one of my Trailblazing goals. You have the self strength to keep going even in failure. It takes a lot to admit you were in the wrong place.” He sighed. Seeming to make a mental agreement in his head. “To be honest with you, You..remind me a bit of my son.”
“You have a son?”
“Yes. His name is Joffrey. We always call him Joey. I adopted him in my 50’s” He adjusted his glasses, pushing them up fully back onto his face. “I never got to see him fully grow up. I had to say goodbye to that life a while ago. Long before I ended upon the express. He’d be around your age, Now.”
“I see. That’s..” Sunday cleared his throat. “Thank you. That’s incredibly high praise. I don’t know if I’ve ever received a better..compliment.”
“I mean it.” Welt patted the top of the blankets, on Sunday’s leg. “You haven’t exactly had many good examples to keep, In your life. I’m more than happy to be there for you. It’s what a friend does.”
“Thank you, I..” Sunday shook his head. “I don’t know what to say.”
“That’s alright.”
“Sorry for the delay, It took me a bit to find.” Himeko had opened the door and reentered. She held out the phone for Sunday to take. “Here.”
“Thank you.” He put his phone in his lap, Deciding to wait a few minutes before texting his sister. He always seemed to get blubbery whenever he did. He missed her.
“Text us if you need anything.” Himeko smiled, habitually rubbing Sunday’s shoulder with sympathy before she started to head out the room. “I’m going to go get Shush started on making you something to eat. You'll know where to find me, Welt.”
“I’ll be down in a few minutes.” Welt nodded to her as she left the room, before turning his gaze back to Sunday. “I’ll refresh the cloth before I leave you to rest for a bit. Is there anything that you need?’
“Could I..get a straw?”
“Yes.” Welt stood up, walking over to Stelle’s kitchen area and searching for a few seconds, before finally fetching one and quickly placing it into Sunday’s water. “Anything else?’
‘No. I don’t think so.” Sunday shook his head, giving a grateful smile. “Thank you.”
“Happily.” Welt grabbed the cloth and submerged it yet again. When he placed it back on his forehead, he ruffled Sunday’s hair a bit. “Alright. I’ll be checking in on you regularly, But try to get some sleep. I know that may be easier said than done.”
Sunday nodded. He watched as Welt exited the room, and headed out the door.
—–˗ˏˋ 𓅪 ˎˊ˗—--
He immediately picked up his phone and opened his messages with Robin.
Robin: Brother!
Robin: Himeko contacted me saying you weren’t feeling well. What’s going on? And you better be honest!
Robin: You can always talk to me about these sorts of things. I know how freaked out you get when you’re sick.
Robin: I love you and I miss you. I already asked if I could visit soon, I’m trying to edit my schedule to make it tomorrow if I can.
Robin: I’m not busy today. I have my notifications on. I can call you in the afternoon! ٩(ˊᗜˋ*)و ♡
-Sunday has come online.-
Sunday: I’m sorry to worry you. I just got ahold of my phone
Sunday: It’s been a very weird, Stressful, Nauseating morning.
Robin: Don’t worry about me (◞ ‸ ◟ㆀ)
Robin: What's going on?
Sunday: It’s a lot to explain
Robin: (._.)
Sunday: Okay. I’ll explain anyway
Sunday: Sickness wise..I believe I have largely made it a lot worse
Sunday: I have a fever of 103ish. I haven’t been sleeping well. Passing out and throwing up a lot
Sunday: Apparently it’s not a good idea to not sleep for 24 hours with a fever
Robin: Sunday..
Sunday: Yes yes I know
Sunday: I’ve been having some troubles with cleaning since getting on the express
Sunday: As in, I clean a lot more and very specifically and the others do not care nearly as much as I do
Robin: That isn’t very shocking..
Sunday: Anyways. I’ve been sneaking out at night to clean
Robin: Of course you have
Sunday: I got a bit carried away
Sunday: And mister Yang caught me cleaning at 5 am
Sunday: And I got trapped into an actual conversation about my feelings
Sunday: I still really don’t understand why theyre all so nice to me
Sunday: Especially mister Yang
Robin: You’re too hard on yourself
Sunday: Says everyone ever apparently
Sunday: Sorry this is the first time I’ve been alone in around an hour and a half and my brain is still a bit fried
Sunday: But everyones been incredibly caring
Sunday: I’m currently bundled in miss Stelle’s bed, with a washcloth on my head, and I’m being made food
Sunday: It’s crew policy to take care of each other when sick it seems
Robin: That doesn’t surprise me. They’re all very caring
Sunday: Yeah. It’s been very nice
Sunday: I think
Sunday: Also very overwhelming?
Robin: How did the talk about your feelings go?
Robin: You are not the most open book in the world
Sunday: Really good I think
Sunday: I’m honestly not sure
Sunday: I talked about Father
Sunday: And my fucked up wings
Robin: How detailed?
Sunday: Oh incredibly vague whenever possible
Sunday: I don’t even know why I talked about as much as I did
Sunday: I was just freaking out over the concept of him finding me
Sunday: And I asked him to promise me that I wouldn’t get punished for talking about it and he immediately agreed
Sunday: And it just. Happened
Sunday: He told me I wasn't a burden and that he wanted to help me
Sunday: And I started sobbing
Sunday: And he hugged me and I sobbed more
Sunday: I’m personally blaming my fever for that
Robin: Oh, and not your glaring daddy issues? ( ≖‿ ≖ )
Sunday: No.
Sunday: But it’s quite funny that you say that
Sunday: Mister Yang said I reminded him of his son
Sunday: That he apparently has
Robin: Awwwwwww
Sunday: I think I’m missing a lot of details here
Sunday: I told him about my OCD and such
Sunday: He said they’re gonna remake the chore sheet
Sunday: So I don't have to sneak out anymore
Robin: Oh so a reasonable, Logical solution?
Sunday: I felt guilty.
Robin: Sunday, You always feel guilty
Sunday: Okay yes I know
Sunday: I just
Sunday: I am terrified of fucking this up
Robin: I know :(
Sunday: I don’t know why i’m even allowed here
Sunday: And mister Yang even said he considers me one of them already and that i was his friend
Sunday: and said he wasn’t the only one who did
Sunday: and I don’t get why
Sunday: He gave me this whole talk(which is where the son thing came up) about how he thinks trailblazing is a lot more for me then i think
Sunday: and that I belong more than I think
Sunday: He said that the others wanted to bring me to a past world they trailblazed and that he thinks id like it there. I’d like the hope in the world
Sunday: and he complimented me a lot
Sunday: I’m so out of my depth
Robin: Sunday..
Sunday: I don’t know how to be cared for
Sunday: I’m not good at it
Sunday: I’m terrified that I am so bad at being cared for that I am going to somehow make them hate me for all of this
Sunday: The only person I can remember taking care of me is You and our mother
Robin: Sunday
Sunday: I feel so gross for even accepting all of this
Sunday: For being in Stelles bed
Sunday: for everything
Sunday: I was carried like a child because I passed out
Sunday: And I’m being fretted over
Sunday: And I think Yang implied he wouldnt mind being my father figure
Sunday: but im really not sure
Sunday: and i might just be delusional
Sunday: He said that I did not have a lot of good role models in life
Sunday: and it seemed pretty clear he was implying Father there
Sunday: Cause we were just talking about him being a dad
Sunday: and I dont know how to handle that information
Sunday: i just said thank you and that I didn’t know what to say
Sunday: cause what do you say
Sunday: honestly
Sunday: And he was fine with that and he smiled at me
Sunday: I really cant fuck this up
Sunday: but I already am I think
Sunday: Fuck
Robin: Sunday
Robin: I don’t think you’re fucking up anything
Robin: Take a deep breath
Sunday: Okay
Sunday: Sorry
Robin: No apologies necessary
Robin: You have a lot of shit wrong with you
Robin: Said with so much love
Robin: It is completely reasonable that you are freaking out
Sunday: Okay. Yeah
Robin: Being a vulnerable person has never been your forte
Robin: It was beaten out of you
Robin: And that is not normal or okay for it to have happened
Robin: And it will affect you
Sunday: I know
Robin: It sounds like Welt is very understanding of what's going on
Robin: And it sounds like you are benefiting from talking with him
Sunday:..I think so.
Robin: I want you to do something for me
Robin: Next time it seems like you are about to have another opening a page of your book moment
Robin: Talk to him about this?
Sunday: Okay. But what if he hates me and assumes that me thinking he could hate me for this is actually me implying that I think he would actually think that when I dont but i do but i dont
Robin: Or
Robin: And hear me out on this
Robin: He would take your anxieties at face value
Robin: And be more understanding in the fact that you are in a very new situation for you?
Sunday: Okay yes that is logically what he would do
Sunday: I am not thinking very logically
Robin: Really. I would never have guessed
Sunday: Okay fair
Sunday: I’m sorry for being a nervous wreck
Sunday: I don’t wanna be a burden
Robin: You are nothing but my loving dear brother
Robin: You will never be a burden to me
Sunday: Thank you. I love you
Robin: I love you too
Sunday: Okay so I should definitely talk to him about the whole
Sunday: I never really have received care and I kinda dont know how to receive it
Sunday: Thing
Robin: Yes.
Sunday: I will try
Robin: Besides all of that
Robin: How are you holding up?
Sunday: Oh my aeons am I miserable
Sunday: I really don’t wanna be detailed with the crew because I feel so guilty for all of this enough
Sunday: But this is awful
Sunday: I thought it was just me recovering from being in the Dream still
Sunday: And I think that is where it started
Sunday: I was already constantly more nauseous than usual and my sleep is going as good as it usually does
Sunday: I’ve been full on passing out everytime I touch too much water which is kinda common?
Sunday: And I haven't really kept anything down in a few days
Sunday: I’ve had a constant headache
Sunday: And I got my fever yesterday morning
Sunday: It has quickly gotten worse
Sunday: I’ve been really dizzy
Sunday: And I know i’ve already mentioned nausea but everytime my usual
Sunday: Nausea causing things happen
Sunday: It’s just so bad I can’t really describe how bad it is
Robin: That’s not good :(
Sunday: My throat is ridiculously sore
Sunday: And I’ve been keeping my extra wings tucked away
Sunday: Instead of spreading them out around when I’m home like I typically do
Sunday: Although I might stop now that I’m thinking about it. Now that mister Yang knows about my back
Robin: You should..
Robin: It’s not healthy to keep them hidden all the time
Sunday: I know
Sunday: Okay I’m getting really dizzy looking at my phone and I’m only feeling worse
Sunday: I might need to cut this short
Robin: You should try to get some sleep, Sunday
Sunday: Yeah that is what I was instructed to do
Sunday: Talking with you helped a lot.
Sunday: Like always
Robin: I’m happy I helped
Sunday: I love you
Sunday: And I miss you more than you can imagine
Robin: You too, Brother
Robin: I’ll text you when I can call, Okay?
Robin: And I did instruct Himeko to send me updates
Robin: So don’t stress too much
Sunday: I’ll try
Sunday: Talk to you later. -`♡´-
-Sunday has gone offline-
Sunday sniffed and put his phone on the nightstand. It took a few minutes of deep breathing and rubbing his face, but he did settle deeper into the bed without any more tears. Actually attempting to sleep would be the most difficult part of this process. But he would attempt it nonetheless.
Sunday took a deep breath, and imagined a flower opening.
Two more sets of wings appeared on the sides of his head, unfurling and relaxing with his original pair. The relief of effort almost pulled him into a nice slumber right there. He moved onto his side, Closed his eyes, and Waited.
And waited.
And waited.
—–˗ˏˋ 𓅪 ˎˊ˗—--
Welt was delighted to walk into the room and see Sunday actually sleeping. It was a bit jarring to see more wings then he remembered, but not too surprising. He pulled over one of Stelle’s desk chairs next to the bed so he would have a seat that wouldn’t disturb the boy, and sat down. He refreshed the washcloth and grimaced at how hot it was yet again. Sunday sighed in his sleep when he placed it back down.
All he could really do is rest and wait until the soup arrived or Sunday woke up.
So that he did. Luckily, this gave him plenty of time to do more research on Halovians. He had Dan Heng upload everything he could, so thankfully this gave him enough to get a rough basis of the basics. He even shot a quick text to Doctor Ratio for some insight. He said he would reply when he had free time. He also seemed heavily intrigued as to why, Which slightly baffled the man. Ratio was never one to be heavily invested in a topic, Unless it was for research alone. Did he research Halovians? Or does he have a sudden interest in who is kept aboard the Express?
Around 45 minutes later, March entered the room with a bowl of soup in her hands.
“Awwww…” She cooed. “He looks so peaceful when he's sleeping. Do you want me to put the soup in the fridge?”
“That would be great. We can heat it up when he wakes up.” Welt put his phone in his pocket, taking the opportunity to refresh the cloth yet again. He had been doing so around every 5 minutes. It was only getting hotter.
“That bad, Huh?” March walked over to the fridge and put the bowl inside, walking over to the bed afterwards. “You only use that face when you’re really worried..”
“His fever is very high.” Welt shook his head. “I can’t check it properly while he’s asleep. This is about all I can do.”
“Well..Let me know if I can do anything. I’m a glorified ice dispenser.”
“I will. Thank you March.”
She patted Welt’s back and then headed out the door. Back to the routine, it seems.
—–˗ˏˋ 𓅪ˎˊ˗—--
Around an hour later, Sunday started to make noises while he slept. It wasn’t too concerning at first, Largely being mumbles that didn’t make any sense. Once it started Welt put his phone away completely. After a few minutes, it was very clearly becoming something to be worried about. The expression on his face was nothing but painful. He was groaning and whining, Tossing around in his sleep. Welt was just petting his hair back, trying to give small comforts as he could. His mumbles were getting louder and louder.
Then Sunday started to apologize. Then he started to plead . Begging for forgiveness. Saying it wouldn’t happen again. Saying he didn’t need anything. Saying it was an accident, and that he would make up for it. He kept making high pitched noises in between his words. He was starting to hyperventilate in his sleep. His body was trembling. All of his wings were quivering. It seemed every second that went by it was only getting worse. Tears were rolling down his face. He almost shouted Robin’s name.
Then Welt heard what connected all of the dots.
He asked what his Father was doing.
Welt didn’t quite know what to do. In all the talking they did, He never really established where Sunday’s boundaries lied. He didn’t know what would happen if he forcibly woke him up. He really did not want to make matters worse. He retracted his hand from his head, deciding to hold his hand instead.
Then it was ripped out of his grasp, Sunday shot up; not seeming to notice that Welt was even there.
He immediately brought his knees to his chest. His wings covered his face. His hands tangled instantly in his hair. His feathers were puffed up and splayed out haphazardly. Sharp almost unhearable noises kept escaping his throat every time he hiccuped.
And he Sobbed . He sobbed so loud it sounded like his throat was being shredded.
“Fuck! ” Every inch of him was trembling, And he looked like he was about to rip his hair out. His knuckles were white. He was hitting himself repeatedly on the top of his head.
“Sunday, Hey,” Welt pulled the chair right up next to the bed. “Can you hear me?”
He flinched, but his behavior didn’t stop. If anything, it got worse. His breathing got more erratic. His sobs got louder. He gave a nod of confirmation.
“Can I touch you?” He received a tiny nod. Immediately Welt leaned over, gently prying Sunday’s hands away from his head. Once he had both of his hands untangled and brought away, he placed them both in one hand, and used his other to gently settle his hair.
“You’re alright.” He had his thumb gently rubbing back and forth. “It’s just us.”
“I-I-” Sunday choked on a sob, Which caused him to cough so badly the bed shook. He curled tighter around himself. “I’m so- So s-sorry. I- I can’t-”
“Hey, hey,” Welt moved his hand to Sunday’s knee. “It’s okay. You’re okay. I’m not upset.”
“I-” Sunday shook his head, his hands starting to hold on tight. His entire chest kept moving erratically. “I can’t breathe, I can’t- I’m Sor-”
“You don’t need to apologize. I’m going to get on the bed with you, Alright?” Welt, Albeit awkwardly, stood up and pushed the chair back slightly. He held onto Sunday’s hands as he moved to sit on the other side of him. Then, He gently started to push his legs away from his chest. “If you put your legs down it’ll help you breathe, You’re constricting your airflow. You don’t have to move anything else.”
“I’m so sorry, I-” Sunday did comply with the request. He even moved his wings away from his face, but he yanked one hand away so he could cough into his elbow. Then he hit his chest, Shaking his head back and forth in panic.
“Sunday, Can you look at me?” Welt moved his hand to be holding onto his wrist, So the other could feel his pulse. Sunday was looking at him with pure terror on his face. Eyes wide with his pupils blowing in and out, all wings quivering with feathers plastered in all directions, Halo dull..almost lifeless. And then randomly flashing with light.. “Focus on me, Alright? Feel my heartbeat. You’re okay. You’re sick, and you’re panicking, but you are safe . You don’t need to apologize, You don’t need to talk. Just breathe. Deep breaths.”
It took a minute, But it worked. Sunday didn’t stop sobbing, He didn’t stop shaking, But he was able to get his breathing under control. He relaxed his hands to read Welt’s pulse better. He was able to go thirty seconds without a coughing fit. It worked. Enough.
“..I’m so sorry.” He sniffed. “I’m so bad at this. I- I don’t know.”
“You don’t need to apologize.” Welt shook his head, gently rubbing Sunday’s back. He felt..burningly warm. “If you would like to talk about it, You can.”
“..It wasn’t anything too bad.” He took a pause to cough a few times. “Just-Just memories. Of the last time I was this sick.”
“I...see.” Welt took a deep breath. “You were talking in your sleep. I apologize if I’m overstepping but..I’m sorry you went through that. Whatever it was. You didn’t deserve that. You sounded terrified.”
“I was…Never taken care of when I was sick. Robin tried, But it was..dangerous, So I wouldn’t let her. I-I was never really taken care of in general. “ He sobbed. “I don’t even know how to do it. What to say. What to do. Isn’t that-Isn’t that pathetic?”
“No. It’s not.”
“I’m so petrified of fucking this all up. I can’t fuck this all up. I shouldn’t e-even be here. I don’t deserve it. Any of it.” His voice was getting more broken with every word. Some of his words were slowly starting to slur together. “I’m so stupidly broken that I am absolutely convinced that I’ll do something wrong and I’ll ruin everything with this. That I’ll make you all hhate me. That you’ll all finally open your eyes and see what I actually am. I was supposed to be dead, Or his puppet until the end of time. How the fuck was I supposed to know what to do with this? How? It’s- It’s just- “
“Sunday, We won’t hate you. You can’t fuck up being taken care of. At least, not in a way that would damage anything you have here.” All he could really do was look him in the eyes. The constantly darting, erratic eyes. “It’s new for you. That’s all it is. We’ll talk you through it, We’ll give you extra space. We can alleviate how overwhelming it is, As much as we can. The only thing you can do is live and learn.”
“What if it-it's not enough? What if I’ve already ruined it, byy even talking about this? I’ve never even had a-a friend before. I feel like a doomed case, I’m separated from the only person who makes me anything more then-then- him .” Sunday kept hiccuping. If he could describe his body like anything, it would be that his exhaustion was pulling him into some puddle. He didn’t even feel like himself. It felt like he was in the air and the ground at the same time. “I’d be better as a corpse. Then I wouldn’t be- I couldn’t hurt you all again. I wouldn’t be-be sick.”
“I promise you, Letting us take care of you will not damage your relationship with any of us. Especially me.” Welt was very thankful that his guess of Sunday relying heavily on promises was correct. He seemed to physically soften at hearing that. “I’d argue you’re helping your relationships with us by allowing yourself to be taken care of. By communicating what you’re feeling. That’s a good thing, Sunday. You are wrong about how you see yourself. You would be better off if you had never met your supposed Father. Not dead. I am personally relieved that you lived through what happened. You have such a good heart, It’s damaged but it's still good.”
He didn’t reply this time. He just cried. He maintained eye contact, He leaned into his touch, But he didn’t push himself to say anything.
“You seemed to be comforted by it last time, So. Would you like a hug?”
Sunday’s reply was essentially throwing himself into Welt’s arms. He felt like a child for it, Of course, But it..did make him feel better. He gave good hugs. He tucked you into his shoulder, he supplied the perfect amount of pressure, He didn’t let go until you did. It felt safe.
He sobbed. And he sobbed. Welt just kept rubbing his back, and the back of his head. His back felt unnatural, Bumpy and malformed where it shouldn’t be possible. He avoided touching those areas when he found them, and avoided his spine altogether. He kept repeating that it was okay. He kept reassuring him that he wasn’t upset. He kept reminding him it was good that this was happening. He didn’t let go.
It took longer than Sunday would ever admit until he stopped sobbing. Until the panic finally dissolved. But it did. Eventually. His ragged sobs turned into practical pants, and the tears running down his cheeks were replaced by sweat. His wings slowly smoothed out and straightened, drooping downwards to further the scene. His pupils were just blown now. Unmoving.
“Sunday, I’m going to check your temperature, Alright?”
Sunday didn’t feel like he had the energy to talk anymore. He just nodded. He didn’t even bother to move out of Welt’s arms. Not even when Welt leaned over to grab the thermometer off of the nightstand. Or when he just put it directly into his mouth, Instead of handing it to him like last time.
He didn’t bother reacting when it beeped. He didn’t say anything when Welt pulled out his phone with evident panic on his face. He blinked a few times, but he was too tired to try to do anything. He felt like he was melting. Everything ached. It was almost like he could feel the sensation and texture of the blanket seeping into his skin.
He did think it was a little strange he was calling instead of texting, Though. It rang twice before it was picked up
“Sunday’s temp is 104.7 and seems to be…. Could you..”
He couldn’t tell what he was saying anymore. That number was pretty high. He couldn’t even bother to care. He couldn’t remember if he had ever had a temperature that high before. Was that normal?
He was so tired. Welt was taking off his sweater and shirt, Now. He just held out the limbs it seemed he wanted. His head was so heavy. He was leaning against the other again.
Then two other people arrived. Himeko and…Dan Heng, it seemed. It was getting hard to keep his eyes open. He really wanted some water. He would kill for some water. He shouldn’t think that. That’s bad of him.
Dan Heng left to go to a different part of the area. Himeko was now holding a straw up to his mouth. Oh, Thank Xipe, His prayers were answered. He drank until he couldn’t anymore. The lack of air during it made him go into a coughing fit, Which made him wish he had more, But he would live. His back was being rubbed again. Aeons his throat hurt. He didn’t have the energy to look, but he needed to apologize for coughing up phlegm on Welt later.
His head felt like he was underwater. Everything was swimming. He felt like he was spinning even though he was fairly confident he was being held in place. He could’ve sworn he heard Robin’s voice. She couldn’t be here, Could she? He tried to call out to her and coughed yet again.
Himeko was looking at him with a bit of panic now. Did he do something wrong? Fuck, She must be upset he coughed on Welt.
He forced himself to speak. Maybe he could ask for some more water while he was at it. That would be really nice.
“I’m..sorry.”
Welt’s face was in view now, Looking at him. Speaking to him. He still can’t really hear anything. It’s all just buzzing.
“I can’t hear you. I’m sorry.” Aeons above did his head hurt. His stomach too. And his chest. That was probably just because of what happened earlier. Surely. “I..need water”
Welt looked over at Himeko and said something. She ran out of view.
He was being lifted up now. Welt was still holding him. It was nice. He was brought into the room Dan Heng had disappeared into. Which was the bathroom. That made a lot of sense. Why were they..?
“I can’t take a-” Sunday coughed again. He was placed down to sit on the edge of the bathtub, With Welt supporting the entirety of his bodyweight. “..I’d..”
Himeko was in view again. She had brought him some water, like he asked. He repeated the same events of last time, Practically chugging it through the straw. He took pauses to breathe this time at least. It was really really cold this time. His breathing was starting to become more and more jagged. In the corner of his eye, He saw a new person enter the room..he couldn’t quite tell who it was. A hand was cleaning up his chin.
His pants were pulled off, which seemed to be a team effort of Welt and..someone. The new person in the room felt so..familiar. He just couldn’t see well enough. He kept trying to blink, and force his eyes to focus, but it was just making him more dizzy. He had to swallow not to gag.
He was gently lifted again, and then he felt himself being lowered into the bath. The water was only up to his hips, And he felt that someone was holding him up, Somehow. He closed his eyes. He was so tired. He gave into the sensation as he felt water continuously being poured onto his back. He whispered for his sister as he drifted off to sleep.
—–˗ˏˋ 𓅮 ˎˊ˗—--
Sunday woke up.
His entire body was freezing. He couldn’t even tell where he was. He knew he was sick, but that's about all he could remember. He felt like he was floating. Water was on him, and he was being held onto a ledge. Everything sounded pretty quiet, besides the water. Floating seemed fitting.
Sunday opened his eyes.
Right, He was in the bathroom. He was sick. Someone familiar had entered the room before he fell asleep. He blinked a few times and searched. Oh!
“..Robin? Is that you?”
“Sunday, You’re awake.” A voice to his right sounded really relieved. He couldn’t tell who it was. “Can you hear me now?”
“Yes?” He blinked a few more times. He didn’t move his gaze from who he thought was his sister. He couldn’t be wrong. He never was. “Robin.?”
“You sound confused.” Another cup of water was poured onto his back. He shuddered. “Can you tell me what you remember?”
“I don’t know. Everything is..Weird.” Sunday groaned when water went over the sensitive part of his back. He shook his head. “I remember someone entering the room? But not how I-I got here. I’m really..dizzy.”
“You’re sick. Your fever got a bit too high. That’s all you really need to know.” There was a reassuring hand on his shoulder now. Rubbing their thumb against his skin. “Just take it easy. You’ll be able to rest again shortly.”
“I-I can’t. This can’t be happening right now.” He tried to push himself up, but it was no use. The hands keeping him there were not budging. “If my Father found out- I can’t. I have to-”
“Hey, hey.” The voice sounded sad. Sunday couldn’t hold back his instinct, and His halo instinctively searched out for the emotions around him. Worry and sadness hit him like a truck, it felt like a heavy blanket was pulling him into the abyss. He wondered if it's similar to how Nihility feels. He sobbed. “You’re safe here. It’s alright.”
“You-You don’t understand.” His breathing hitched. He shook his head again. His head was spinning. “The last time I let this happen I lost my wings. It could’ve- It would’ve-”
“Sunday, I need to do this. I’m sorry. This kind of temperature can cause permanent damage.” The pressure keeping him down hadn’t wavered. He couldn’t budge. “Where do you think you are?”
“Home? Otherwise Robin couldn’t be here. She can tell you.” Sunday pleaded. He looked at her as tears ran down his cheeks. He was trying to move his body no matter what. The pouring of the water had to stop as everyone had to reach out to help restrain him. He kept slipping and hitting the porcelain. “I can’t take the punishment alone this time. I-I can’t let that happen to her. Please. Please let me go. She could- She can’t.”
“..He thinks I’m Robin.” He blinked. That didn’t make any sense. He knows that's Robin. “I’ve got this. I think.”
Robin moved to be sitting in front of him, on the floor outside of the tub. She smiled. His vision was so blurry.
“Hey, Sunday.” He felt the pouring of the water resume. They seem to be avoiding his spine now. “We aren’t home. Father isn’t here. I already made sure this can’t reach ears outside of this room.”
He sniffed. He blinked a few times, and he took a deep breath.
“We’re on the Astral Express. Can you take a second to try and think about it? And drink some water?” She was handed a cup of water with a straw, And she held it up to his mouth. He took a few gulps. “It’s okay if you can’t. You need to stay here, Right now.”
“..Right.” His wings flicked. His halo was uncharacteristically dull. He managed to move his arm just enough to cough into it. “I..I don’t get it.”
“Get what?” She tilted her head. Her wings didn’t move much..
“My head- I-“ He shuddered. “I’m on the Astral Express. This wasn’t-Isn’t some sort of dream. But-But how. I know what my childhood bathroom looks like. I know-“
“Hey..” She shook her head, moving her hand to gently pet his hair down. “You can take your time. Don’t rush. Can you tell me what you see?”
“Everything is…blurry. I feel like I’m spinning. But…” He gestured to the wall, And then to the counter. “Father’s portrait is right there. There’s a-an Oak family crow. I can-I can see you. It doesn’t make sense.”
“I see..” She seemed to be taking a second to think. She looked over to the right, where Sunday assumed the man was sitting. She looked back at him a little more assured. “Sunday, You’re hallucinating. Could you drink some more water for me?”
He obliged her request, once she put the straw back up to his mouth. He finished the glass.
“Good job.” She handed the cup over to the right. His tears had finally stopped. “Can you close your eyes for me?”
He listened to her. It’s his sister, Afterall.
“I’m going to explain how you got here. I want you to try to imagine what I’m saying. Can you do that?”
He nodded.
“You were sleeping in Stelle’s bed, You woke up, And then Mister Yang called us because your fever was too high. Can you remember being in Stelle’s room? What it looks like?”
“..Yes.”
“Good.” She paused, taking a deep breath. “You were carried into the bathroom, And you fell asleep the second the water touched you. The water is lukewarm, and your temperature has slowly gotten more in control. It’s been around an hour.”
“Right. I. I remember that, Now. I think.”
“Good!” She pet his hair again. “I want you to focus on whoever would be the easiest to remember. Who do you think that would be?”
“…Mister Yang?”
“That sounds perfect. I’m going to adjust you a bit, Okay?”
He nodded. And then he felt his body being shifted to the right. Four different hands touched his skin. He really wasn’t used to that.
“Whenever you think you’re ready, I want you to open your eyes.”
Sunday took a few minutes, but eventually, they opened.
Welt was smiling at him. Like he was waiting for this to happen. The emotion he could practically taste was too complicated for him to decipher. It felt Fatherly. Unknown.
Sunday sighed with relief.
“That seemed to work.” He was the one holding him up this whole time, it seemed.
“Good.” Welt’s body visibly relaxed. His face seemed wrecked with worry. “How was your nap?”
“..Uneventful.” He coughed against the tub. His back was really starting to ache. “How long do I have to be here? I..”
“Until your fever is low enough. We can check it right now, If you’d like?”
Sunday nodded. Someone else came into view then. Red hair, gold accents…Himeko. Himeko was the one putting the thermometer into his mouth. He was good and kept his mouth shut until it beeped.
“103.8. That’s better!” She smiled at him. It reminded him of his mother. He had to avert his gaze before he cried all over again. It was hard not to when relief washed through every pore.“It’s finally going down.”
“We have to keep going just a little bit longer, Alright?” Welt was giving him a look of pure sympathy. “What’s bothering you?”
“..My back.” He tried to shift a little and yelped in pain. Now that the utter confusion had worn off, Everything was starting to burn with aches again. “I- I really can’t..”
“Would readjusting help?”
He shook his head.
“Do you know anything that does help?”
“I. Um.” He coughed yet again. “Massaging helps. But. As…you know. It’s- It’s complicated. I’m used to the dreamscape pools.”
“I could give it a try, If you’d like.” Himeko offered. The person he could’ve sworn was Robin had left the room. “I need to know a bit more details, Though. I’d love to help. I just don’t want to make it worse.”
“I- Could you. Give me a..few minutes?” Sunday shook his head. “I need to figure out how to..explain.”
“Take your time. I won’t be going anywhere.”
Sunday closed his eyes. He was silent for a few minutes. He put his head down against his arm, which seemed to help the spinning for a little while. Then it was worse again.
“So. Um.” He mumbled. “This is hard. I don’t r-remember what my back even looks like.”
“That’s okay.” She spoke so softly to him. It made his chest hurt. “I can fill in the dots.”
“How..much do you know about Halovian wings?”
“I know that there is variety in the amount of wings you can have. Some have none. If I remember correctly, High proficiency in attunement with the Harmony can let you disguise them and put them away.” She paused for a second. Seemingly to think. “Halovians with large back wings have added bones for support, Like..two extra segments of a spine? That connect through? I admit, I do not know too much.”
“That’s more than m-most people.” He nodded into his arms. “My-My wings were severed. Without care, not surgically. I still have those bones. My wings were- um- broken not at the base, so all of the inward bones are still..there. If- If you look..”
“That sounds terrible, Sunday.” He could hear her move a few feet. There was a hand on his shoulder. “I’m looking. Continue?”
“I haven’t- I haven’t done this in a really long time. It might take a-a bit.” He sniffed. Sunday’s halo glowed faintly as he focused, Imagining two hands at the base of his back that pushed out. It took three tries until he finally felt his attunement give way. “You-You should be able to see now. I keep them hidden…for a reason. I. I apologize. It’s disgusting. I’m disgusting.”
Sunday’s back was now fully revealed. His wings weren’t fully gone. It was like they were chopped off with a knife. It looked revolting. Unhealthy feathers going in all directions, ugly scarring everywhere, With skin barely covering jagged bones that didn’t seem to be in the right place. It looked sickly, and wrong.
“You don’t need to apologize. You’re not disgusting at all.” She did give a small gasp when she saw. Welt did too. His stomach churned inward with guilt. “I see what you mean, Now. You want me to avoid touching all of the bones?”
“No. Um. You-You really can’t” He swallowed. “There’s still muscle around them. And-and in my actual back. But..if you could avoid touching where it all connects. I’d appreciate it. It-It hurts too much otherwise.”
“I can do that.” She slowly moved her hand down his back, Seemingly to test the waters of what he could handle. “Try to relax as much as you can. Let me know if you need me to stop, or pause, Okay?”
“Okay. Th-Thank you.” He sniffed. He felt Himeko’s hands now start to slowly and oh so gently massage in between the bones. She realigned some feathers. She avoided the center of his spine while still attending to every muscle she could find. It was painful, but heavenly. He hadn’t felt this relieved since he was in the Dream. If he let out a few soft groans, Nobody commented. Occasionally Himeko would pause as someone else poured water onto him. “I’m sorry you have to-to see them. I’ve kept them hidden since Robin first saw. It’s horrific. I’m..so sorry.”
“It’s alright, Sunday. You don’t need to apologize.” Welt was rubbing circles onto his skin where he was being held. “How long has it been?”
“I was..15, I think?” Sunday sighed when Himeko slowly pushed a knot out of his muscles. “It’s hard to remember.”
“That’s a pretty long time.” Himeko spoke as she applied a little more pressure. “Would you be willing to get this looked at?”
“..If I had to, Yes.” Sunday choked on his spit, Sending him into a coughing fit. Tears were in the corner of his eyes. The guilt swirling in his stomach was getting harder and harder to ignore.
“We can figure that out. Once you’re feeling better.” A hand was rubbing his back as he coughed. “Are you up to telling us how you’re feeling, Right now?”
“My head, My chest, and my stomach really hurt” He attempted to clear his throat, which only ended up making him feel worse. “My throat..burns. My joints burn. I’m really dizzy…and nauseous. It feels like there's some weird..weight on my chest. Breathing is..difficult? I-I don’t know. I’m not good at..this. And your emotions are disgustingly hard to filter through. Wait not that it’s- I- I’m sorry, It’s just-””
“That’s a good start. It’s alright. Anything else?” Welt patted gently to end his train of thought. “It’s okay, No offense is taken. I can’t imagine I’d have a good time in your shoes right now.”
“My skin has been feeling awfully..irritated? I think I had a..a rash. Coughing makes me dizzier, and..really hurts.” He couldn’t help himself from physically melting when Himeko worked out the biggest knot in his back. “Honestly, everything really hurts. I don’t…mean to complain, Though. I’m just really…tired.”
“You sound exhausted.” Sunday finally moved his head to look back towards Welt. His coughing was starting to get worse. “You’re not bothering us, Sunday. It’s normal for you to complain. Especially at this moment.”
“Okay.” Was the only reply he could think to say. At least he replied, this time.
“We should be able to get you back into bed, Soon. Do you feel like you could eat?”
“I…could try. I’m really nauseous. And..spinny.” His eyes blinked very slowly as if to prove his point. “I don’t know if I could even sit up.”
“We can try. It’s really important that we get some food in you.” One of the hands keeping him up left, And the thermometer is being placed in his mouth again. “I can help if you need. I'm certainly not letting you walk, Right now.”
Sunday couldn’t reply with the thermometer in his mouth, But he wouldn’t really know what to say anyway. His wings flapped twice. After a few seconds, the beeps went off yet again.
“103 Exactly.” Welt sighed with relief. “It’s still high, But I think we should be safe to get you back into bed. Dan Heng, could you fetch Sunday’s pajamas?”
“Of course.” So that's who was pouring water on him this whole time. That made sense. “I’ll be right back.”
“Himeko, Could you help me lift him out?”
Sunday closed his eyes. She must’ve just nodded, Because he felt her hands retract from her back and instead scoop under his left arm, While Welt scooped under his right. Four hands carefully lifted him out of the bathtub, and he was placed on the ledge yet again. Welt stayed put to keep him balanced. Sunday got a bit paler in the movement.
“Are you alright?”
“Dizzy.” He groaned. “Light..headed.”
“I’ve got you. It’s alright. We’re gonna dry you off.”
The only reply he could give was a small hum of acknowledgement. He felt as a towel slowly dried off his entire body, but very very gently only patted at his back, avoiding the sensitive area entirely. Then he heard a few footsteps, which he assumed was Dan Heng’s return.
“We’re gonna get you dressed now.”
Sunday swallowed, and tried to hum, but ended up coughing instead. The hands supporting him moved to his torso, as his arms were lifted one by one as his shirt was pulled over his head. In the process a bit of pressure got put on his back, which caused him to loudly yelp in pain. His ears buzzed as his face got shades paler.
“I’m so sorry, Sunday. I didn’t realize it would be so tight. Are you okay?”
He shook his head, which only made him dizzier. Which made him groan. Which made him cough. Which made tears start to drip down his face. He had to swallow a gag again.
“I-” He tried to speak, but that made him actually gag. He took a few deep breaths before attempting again. “..Dizzy. Too much.”
He gagged again. This time his hand had to go in front of his mouth for him to not actually throw up.
“Himeko, Grab the bucket, Please?” Welt had moved his hands so he was supporting the entirety of his weight with one hand. Then he felt his hair being gently pulled back. He felt cold plastic poke against his chest. He really didn’t want to throw up. He hated throwing up. He could hear the tears going down his cheeks falling onto the bucket.
He felt his hair being traded into another hand, Now having Welt gently rub the top of his back.
“I know you don’t want to, But it will help the nausea. We aren’t going anywhere. It’ll be okay.”
“I ca-“ Sunday coughed, which immediately caused him to throw up. Repeatedly. His torso essentially convulsed as he retched into the bucket. He was sobbing. He felt disgusted, and guilty, which only made it worse.
“There you go..” Himeko’s voice sounded so…delicate. “It’s okay.”
“You’re doing great, Sunday.” The hand on his back was rubbing in circles. The hand on his chest remained steady. “It’ll be over soon.”
That only caused him to sob more. After a few minutes of constant reassurance, his body stopped defying him, and instead of repeatedly dry heaving; he was just shaking. He was panting, and he was crying; but at least the puking stopped.
He felt the bucket retract from his body and his hair being let go. Then a cup was being put against his lips. He let them tilt his head back and pour water into his mouth.
“Rinse then spit, I’ll bring your actual water over after, Okay?”
He complied. It did make him feel a little less gross. A few seconds later, his straw was placed against his lips. He took a few sips before pulling his head away.
“Let us know when we can finish getting you dressed and get you into bed.” The hand on his back didn’t stop. “Don’t rush.”
“I..think..I can.” Sunday had waited a few minutes. “I. I might pass out, Though.”
“Do you think it would happen regardless, Or should we wait?”
“Regardless... Sorry.”
“Alright. That’s okay. Thank you for the warning.” Welt readjusted, Putting Sunday’s arm around his shoulders and his arm, very carefully, around his back. “Himeko, I’ll stand him up. Can you do the rest?”
“Absolutely. Dan Heng, Could you collect everything we need from here?” He must’ve nodded. Sunday didn’t hear a reply. He felt himself standing up, and as he guessed, he immediately passed out.
When Sunday regained consciousness, He was being held like a child. Again. He was wearing pants now, at least. Less humiliating that way.
“Thank you.” He mumbled so quietly it could’ve been a whisper.
“I’m happy to help.” Welt was placing him into the bed. The sheets seem to have been replaced. He was tucked back in under the blankets. “Can you eat?”
“Not..yet.” He shook his head. He slowly reached over and grabbed his phone, placing it into his lap. “In a bit.”
“That's alright. I’ll get it heated up now.” A reassuring hand was temporarily placed on his shoulder, and then Welt walked away. Sunday searched the room now. Everybody, barring the conductor, was here.
Including March 7th. Who was walking up to him, and sitting on the edge of the bed.
“Hey..” Her body posture was awkward. Her hands were fidgeting in her lap. She looked like she was trying to figure out what to say. “How’s your head?”
“It hurts. But, I’m no longer hallucinating, I don’t think.”
“That’s good!” She paused. Like there was a sentence stuck in her throat. “That must’ve been..scary.”
“I’ve experienced worse.” She looked sad at that response. He shook his head. He took a deep breath. “I thought you were Robin, Didn’t I?”
He proposed a question, but he already knew the answer. March and her were always kindred spirits, to him.
“..Yeah.” She visibly relaxed. “I didn’t mind- I don’t mind. I just..wanted to make sure you were okay. I was worried I made it worse..”
“You didn’t. Trust me.” His voice was still rough. Cracking every other word. “I’m sorry. For what it’s worth. I-I can’t imagine that being..comfortable. It’s hard to explain the..reasoning.”
“Honestly? It was..kinda flattering.” She chuckled. “I mean, I’ve been called a lot of things. But an international star? My favorite artist? Your beloved sister? There are a lot of worse things, I’ll tell ya.”
“I..I see.” He looked down at his hands. “I’m relieved to hear that.”
“I don’t want you to feel bad about it.” She turned her head towards him. He, albeit slowly, returned her gaze. “That's why I came over. I just didn’t know how to say it.”
“Thank you, Miss March.”
“If you need anything, Let me know, Okay?” She stood up, ruffling Sunday’s hair in the process. “I’m a pretty good distraction, I'd say.”
“I’ll. Keep it in mind.”
“I like the wings.” She smiled. “The new ones. They suit you.”
With that, She walked away. Her words paid a soft compliment. One that he didn’t think she knew the gravity of. The significance. Or perhaps she did. She paused to speak to Himeko briefly, and then headed out the door. Sunday took the time to examine what everyone was doing. He really wanted to text Robin, But..it felt a little embarrassing, Still. So this would do.
Stelle seemed to be putting away some laundry, Dan Heng was on the phone, And Himeko was refilling his water and refreshing the bowl for the washcloth. Makes sense that he can’t be free of that yet. Welt was returning to his side. Placing the hot bowl of soup on the nightstand.
“It’s ready. It’ll be a few minutes before it's cool enough for you to eat.” He pulled the chair back to the side of the bed, and sat down. “Everyone should be heading out in a few minutes. Well, Besides me. I don’t think it's safe to leave you alone completely.”
“Okay.” He spun his thumbs around each other. He missed his gloves. “I’m sorry for coughing on you. Earlier. I wasn’t really..cognizant. Miss Himeko seemed upset by it.”
“You don’t need to apologize for that, Sunday. It’s quite alright.” He shook his head. “Himeko wasn’t upset about you coughing, Either. You were coughing up blood. That's why she looked upset. She was worried. As was I.”
“..Oh.” Now that it was mentioned, Sunday could spot the blood on Welt’s jacket. He felt worse. His wings fluttered. Himeko was now talking to Dan Heng, and Stelle left the room without saying anything. He didn’t mind. He couldn’t take his eyes away from the stain. “I see.”
“It’ll come out.” He seemed to notice his gaze. Which caused Sunday to look back at him. “I’ve gotten a lot worse on this jacket.”
Sunday nodded. He took a few deep breaths. Himeko returned to his side, This time. The bowl was placed next to his soup.
“Dan Heng is currently on the phone with our doctor. Stelle was before. He should be stopping by in a few hours. He isn’t the most well versed about Halovian’s specifically, So things will be a little awkward.” She leaned over and put a gentle hand on his chest, looking him in the eyes. “I’m glad you’re okay, Sunday. Thank you for trusting me with your back. I know that was important to you. I’m so sorry about the shirt.”
“Thank you, Miss Himeko. It’s alright.” Sunday had to swallow down his immediate desire to cry. He knew he was a crybaby, But it was starting to become a bit much. If she noticed his voice warble, or his eyes water, she didn’t comment. It was hard to handle the feeling of pure regret for hurting him. “I..don’t know what else to say.”
“That’s fine. I don’t mind.” She gave him a graceful smile. Patting his chest before she stood back up. “We’re leaving now. You know how to reach us.”
He nodded, and watched as Dan Heng and Himeko walked out of the room, Shutting the door behind them. Then there were two.
Sunday, Quite honestly, Would like to have ten minutes of alone time. He already felt overwhelmingly guilty, He already felt like a burden, and he desperately needed to get his emotions out of his system. He wanted to call Robin and sob. He wanted to hide under the covers. He wanted to die, if he had to be honest. He just needed to get his thoughts out of his head, desperately, and he really did not want to burden Mister Yang with that yet again. He was just so overwhelmed. He didn’t know what to do. He couldn’t really do anything. He felt frozen and stuck.
“Sunday, Are you alright?” Welt seems to have a really good ability to guess when he’s upset. Or, Sunday is a lot more obvious than he thinks. Or maybe he just cares. “It’d be understandable if you’re overwhelmed. A lot happened very fast. I’m sorry that you didn’t get much of a breather.”
“Overwhelmed is..an understatement.” Sunday mumbled. “I don’t want to seem ungrateful. I don’t want to complain. I..I just..”
He took a deep breath.
“Robin says I have a bit of a..guilt problem. I don’t disagree.” He swallowed. “My head is just..a mess.”
“I picked up on that.” Welt leaned forward. “Do you want to talk about it? Getting the thoughts out of your head will make it easier.”
He was silent for a minute.
“It’s really nice. Being cared for. Doted on.” Sunday brought up his knees to his chest and leaned forward. “It reminds me of my Mother. I don’t even remember what her face looks like. Only her wings. Her jewelry. My earrings are from her.”
Welt was silent. Just looking at him with an attentful look. He was listening.
“I have few memories of her. Robin has even less.” He shook his head. “We used to only be able to fall asleep to her lullaby. We didn’t think to write it down. Record it. We forgot it before we even had the thought. Robin cried when we realized. I just..blamed myself.”
Before Sunday could regret it, he patted the bed next to him. An open invitation. He couldn’t say why he did. It just felt right.
“I don’t remember myself getting sick. Or being cared for..like that, even by her.” He watched as Welt stood up, grabbed the bowl of soup, walked around the bed, and sat down. He placed the soup in front of the window. He had accepted the invitation. “The association is still there, I suppose.”
“I know a lot about grief.” Welt spoke softly, crossing his legs. “It surprises you.”
“It does. It..honestly makes me feel better, Now. Knowing she still has influence on me. That I can find her in places besides my sister.” He sighed. “It’s sad it took me this long to discover this piece of her. It’s disgusting that my Father has tarnished it.”
“He hasn’t tarnished it.” Welt spoke with confidence, gesturing with one hand. “You can clean it away. Slowly.”
“Would you..be willing to listen to a story?” He moved his head to face Welt entirely, cheek leaning against his knee. “It’s not a fun one.”
“Absolutely.” Welt nodded. He reached behind him and grabbed the bowl, Putting the spoon in his hand. “I don’t want you to run yourself dry. Would you be willing to eat a little, first?”
“Sure.” He slowly put his legs back down. “My body is quite weak. I won’t-”
He stopped talking because there was already a spoonful in front of his mouth. He ate it. It was plain, but nice. He ate half of the bowl, with breaks to drink water. So far his stomach wasn’t rejecting it yet. He refused any more food, though. Shook his head when Welt tried to offer.
“That’s alright.” He put the spoon in the bowl and returned it to the window. “You wanted to tell me a story?”
‘Right.” Sunday took a deep breath. “I’ll be honest. I’ve never told it before. I just..can’t stop thinking about it.”
“I see.” Welt nodded. “Take your time.”
“When I was around 15, I got sick. Really sick. I missed my morning practice with Robin, which I wasn’t allowed to be doing in the first place, So she got worried. She found me in bed, with a fever, choking on my own vomit. I almost died. She’s only a few hours younger than me, So as you can imagine, She was terrified.” He put his head back down. Looked at his hands. His eyes were getting more and more blown out every time he seemed to get upset. “She barely managed to get me to the bathroom herself. She was able to get me breathing again. She was able to get me to drink some water. She was able to clean me up. But there was already a precedent of punishment. We were not allowed to get sick. We were not allowed to mess up our routines. Inconveniencing Father, or showing as nothing but his perfect children, was never allowed. We had only ever gotten small colds, or coughs until then. I always took care of Robin in face of the punishment. I would take both of our punishments myself. Always, if I could. She didn’t think it would be too bad. She was convinced I was going to die, so..”
Sunday took a break to cough. He drank some water afterwards.
“She found the nearest Oak Family member and got me rushed to the emergency room. We had a banquet planned for that night. And she had not only indisposed myself, and herself; but four different staff members.” Sunday felt a few tears go down his cheeks. “Father wasn’t pleased. He had never been so angry before. He found out when we didn’t show up.”
He took a few deep breaths. This was the hard part.
“I woke up to him, inhabiting his favorite Oak Family body, entering the hospital room with five guards. Robin was grabbed by one, So hard her arms bruised, and that..freaked me out. I was grabbed too. I didn’t get discharged, I was just..taken. We were shoved into the car. He wouldn’t say anything. He didn’t say anything. Not until we were dragged home, and thrown into the kitchen.” He couldn’t stop his shoulders from shaking. Maybe talking about it bothered him more than he thought it would. He swallowed his emotions down. “As punishment, Robin was going to lose her wings. The wings that were identical to our mothers. The wings we would both stay up at night pretending that they were our mothers, as we put them around ourselves. My punishment was going to be our typical sickness punishment..A beating for every single event, and no meals until I was better. I don’t know how I had the energy, But..I spoke up.”
A sob slipped out of his mouth.
“I said she did nothing wrong. I asked what he thought he was doing. That it was my fault. That it would never happen again. The guard was ordered to slam my head into the wall. He did. I didn’t stop. Robin screamed for me to stop, and she was thrown against the floor. She passed out.” He coughed. He could feel Welt’s eyes on him. He was doing everything he could to not feel every single emotion going through his body. “I told my Father that if someone's wings had to go they should be mine. He agreed. I was shoved onto the ground, Two of the body guards pulled out knives. One kept me on the ground. Two started beating my wings into the ground. They broke the bones until they could cut through. Then they did. I was told that if I passed out Robin would get the punishment anyways. So I stayed awake. I think some part of me thought he was bluffing at first.”
He sniffed. His hands anxiously fidgeted against his arms.
“Once it was done, I was thrown into my room. I was crudely bandaged. I was told that..it wouldn’t happen again, if I followed the Order. That the Order was the only path to stop the cruel suffering for everyone. The only possible way a failure like me could achieve our dream.” He couldn’t stop his emotions anymore. He sobbed as he spoke. Welt’s feeling of protection and rage and pure grief filled every artery vein and nerve. “Robin came into my room the second she woke up. The last time my wings were ever touched, was then. She said she hated me. She asked why I would do that. She didn’t like it when I weakly replied that I couldn’t let her go through that. That I couldn’t bear to say goodbye to our mothers wings again. She asked how I could do that to her if I couldn’t handle it. Then she just sobbed. She held my wings in her hands, and she sobbed. I hid them away once she went to bed. I never let her see them again. I never took them out again. Afterwards I was almost always in the dream. I was working for the Oak Family by then.”
“Can I touch you?” Was the only reply he got. He nodded.
He was pulled into Welt’s chest, being hugged yet again. A hand was on the back of his neck. It seemed less..for Sunday this time. It was mutual. Appreciated from both ends. He didn’t blame him. It's a rough story.
“Thank you for trusting me with that.” He rubbed Sunday’s back. He just quietly cried into his chest. “That sounds horrific. I cannot imagine what going through it was like. I’m..so sorry, Sunday. I gather today has been very triggering. If there is anything we can avoid, We will.”
“Honestly..You’ve been making it better. You..Everyone..haven’t been the upsetting part.” He sniffed. “I don’t know how to explain it. I feel a bit stupid even talking about it.’
“I’m happy you did. If that helps.” He felt Welt’s thumb rub against the base of his neck. “Talking about things of that nature is always difficult. Conflicting. I cannot imagine it was easy.”
“Nothing is.” He spoke like it was fact. “But it..gives you good insight. Robin told me that I should open up more, so really it wasn’t my idea. I’m nothing without her.”
“Do you base most of your value about yourself on others?”
“I suppose.” He sighed. “It’s hard not to.”
“I get that.” He got a soft squeeze. Incredibly gentle. “You are something without her. You just need help finding who you could actually be. Instead of what you’ve been molded into being.”
“Thank you.” He shook his head. “I still don’t get it, to...be honest.”
“I’m not too surprised by that.” Welt chuckled softly. “Thank you again, Sunday. If you ever need or want to talk more, I am always happy to listen.”
“I’ll keep it in mind.” He coughed. “My..My throat really hurts.”
“You did just talk a lot. Rest your voice.” Welt gave a few sympathetic pats. “If you want to lay back down, Just poke me, Alright?”
Sunday nodded. But he didn’t poke. In fact, After all of the crying, exhaustion, and sickness of today; He ended up falling asleep the second he closed his eyes. Welt moved his phone to the nightstand, He placed a washcloth on his head, And then Sunday was tucked into the bed, and laid down to rest.
—–˗ˏˋ 𓅮 ˎˊ˗—--
Sunday was woken up by a hand shaking his shoulder. It was gentle, and seemed to be trying to not actually bother him. The doctor was there. The visit was fairly quick. He had a couple of tests done, his blood was drawn, and then he was out. It seemed that the crew already handled telling him a lot of his symptoms. He didn’t even have to get out of bed. The most moving he did was to let the doctor look at some of the rashes that were scattered across his skin. He was given some fever reducers. There was ointment for his skin. He was given an I.V. Otherwise, they were waiting to hear back. The doctors theory was that it's a common ailment for another world; And Sunday, without much of an immune system, is pretty susceptible. He was very worried about a lot of things, and insisted they contact another doctor to properly check him up soon. His throat was scratched to hell, so he was demanded to try to rest it for the rest of the day.
He was told to eat more. Drink more. Sleep more. All expected. Welt had him eat the rest of the soup while he was awake. Then he was able to sleep again. So he did. It took a few minutes, but he peacefully drifted off to sleep.
—–˗ˏˋ 𓅮 ˎˊ˗—--
This time Sunday woke up naturally. He slowly sat up in bed to see that he was alone, Although there was evidence that Welt was planning to return on the couch nearby. He put the washcloth back into the bowl, and fetched his phone. It was late in the afternoon. Oh! He missed some texts from Robin!
-10:38 AM-
Robin: Himeko said that your fever got dangerously high :(
Robin: She said you’re sleeping and that the doctor would be by soon. I can imagine what's going on in your head. Text me back when you can, Okay?
-1:05 PM-
Robin: I am officially going to be visiting tomorrow! I could only spare a few hours.
Robin: I got some details about earlier. I love you. I’m around whenever you want to call!
-4:45 PM-
-Sunday has come online.-
Sunday: I’m sorry it took so long for me to get back to you. I love you
Sunday: I have been sleeping
Sunday: It’s been a really long day
Sunday: I don’t think I can call. My throat really hurts. I was told I need to rest it.
Robin: I’m just relieved to hear from you.
Robin: Are you okay? How are you feeling?
Sunday: I really miss you
Sunday: So much has happened
Sunday: I don’t really know where to start. It’ll take a while to explain
Sunday: I’m feeling a lot better right now. Sickness wise
Sunday: Probably due to the medicine and the I.V drip
Robin: I’m happy to hear that
Robin: You’ve got me as long as you need. It doesn’t matter if it makes much sense
Robin: I’m really worried, Sunday. I’d rather hear what happened from you :(
Sunday: Okay well
Sunday: You’ll be happy about this part. I did in fact talk to Mister Yang about what you said I should
Sunday: Although I was quite feverish? I don’t know how coherent I was.
Sunday: You were right. He didn’t hate me or anything. Said it was good for me to communicate
Sunday: Right after that talk is when my fever spiked. Or maybe it was already that high and it just started to fuck with me
Sunday: I couldn’t hear anyone and I apparently coughed up blood. I was just really out of it
Sunday: And they cooled me down with a cold water bath
Sunday: So I in fact fell asleep the second the water touched me
Robin: I’m honestly surprised you did that so fast
Sunday: Okay well I did skip a detail
Sunday: I had a nightmare about my wings
Sunday: He was there when I was doing my normal. Nightmare habits
Robin: Oh so you were a sobbing mess and admitted it mostly out of panic and desperation (=_=")
Sunday: Yes.
Robin: I don’t know what I expected. I’m proud of you anyway
Sunday: Thank you.
Sunday: When I woke up I was hallucinating
Sunday: I thought I was in our childhood bathroom
Sunday: I thought Miss March was you
Sunday: I don’t think i need to explain why
Robin: Oh, Sunday :(
Robin: I got told about that. It’s why I was so worried
Sunday: March actually got me out of it
Sunday: I uh. Uncovered my wings?
Robin: Really?
Sunday: My back really hurt. They were trying to help me stay in the bathtub until it was safe for me to not be
Sunday: So Miss Himeko offered to massage it when I said that's typically what helps
Sunday: I still feel really bad about it. I think it was a large reason why I got sick later on
Sunday: But I did it. I still have them out, technically. I just don’t have the energy to put them back right now. Miss Himeko and Mister Yang said they would organize for them to be looked at, Once I’m not sick. Apparently I’m a walking health concern and need expert opinions.
Robin: I’m kinda in shock over that
Robin: To be honest
Robin: It’s been…so long. I’m so proud of you.
Sunday: Thinking about it for too long makes me shake.
Sunday: So I’m continuing. And changing the topic.
Sunday: I finally got to go back to bed
Sunday: March and I talked and I made sure she wasn't uncomfortable and apologized
Sunday: I was either very obviously overwhelmed and internally panicking or Mister Yang cared enough to ask if I was okay.
Sunday: He even apologized for everything happening. Offered to let me talk
Sunday: And I did. Talked about Mother. Being cared for makes me think of her, A lot.
Sunday: And I hit a point where talking around the thing bothering me was making me feel worse and worse
Sunday: So I told him the full story about my wings.
Robin: Full story? Details and all?
Sunday: Details and all.
Robin: Holy shit
Robin: I’m going to say I’m proud of you again
Robin: I’m really proud of you
Robin: That is an enormous step
Sunday: Yeah. It. Just. Happened?
Sunday: It helped a lot
Sunday: Ever since I feel a lot. Lighter
Sunday: Not fully but.
Robin: That's really good, Sunday.
Robin: I was so worried, but..this has turned out pretty good for you.
Robin: I’m really sorry, though. I wish I could’ve been there.
Sunday: You will be tomorrow. I am very happy about the confirmation.
Sunday: I miss you a lot
Sunday: Seeing how things are going I think I will be stuck to bedrest tomorrow. In case that bothers you
Robin: Oh. You are. ᵔ ᵕ ᵔ
Robin: If they don’t enforce it I’ll tell them to
Sunday: Okay maybe I shouldn’t have said anything
Sunday: I’ve gotten a good amount of sleep. More than I have really since leaving Penacony
Sunday: Oh and uh
Sunday: I think I fell asleep in Mister Yang’s arms?
Sunday: Like. In the bed. Not in when he was holding me up in the water.
Sunday: Last I remember I was hugging him after telling him the full story
Sunday: Which he was. Very kind about. He hugged me and it felt like it wasn’t just to comfort me
Sunday: I feel very delusional
Sunday: I’ve gotten a lot of “Thank you for trusting me”s
Sunday: I believe it should be the other way around
Sunday: I don’t know. I’m tired. Everything is still pretty
Sunday: Hazy
Robin: He’s a good influence on you
Sunday: He is very caring
Robin: You are someone who desperately needs caring
Sunday: Fair enough
Robin: I mean it. You deserve it
Robin: You’ve spent most of our lives protecting me and caring for me no matter what. It’s about time you accept it back, even if it's not from me.
Robin: Not saying you haven’t grown a lot in that regard. You have. But..
Robin: Letting just me in after so many years..
Robin: You deserve more. An actual support system. An actual home.
Sunday: Thank you, Sister.
Sunday: I love you
Robin: I love you too
Sunday: You do have a point
Sunday: I’m just wrapping my head around it still
Robin: I know
Robin: Just don’t be so focused on figuring it out that you don’t accept it
Robin: Or learn how to grow it
Sunday: I’ll try my best
Robin: I know you will
Robin: You always do
Sunday: Can we talk about literally anything else
Robin: Of course
Sunday: Okay I don’t actually have any ideas
Sunday: Has your day been okay?
Sunday: I hope I haven’t been too distracting
Robin: You haven’t been
Robin: It’s just been meetings all day. Some for Penacony and some for my upcoming album
Robin: As in, I want to delay it
Sunday: Delay it?
Robin: Yeah..I don’t know. It doesn’t feel right yet.
Robin: It’s fine. I got what I wanted. Not the full timeline, but at least a bit more time
Sunday: You’ve always been picky with your finished product
Robin: I wonder why. Almost like it runs in the family..
Sunday: Ah, something like that.
Sunday: I’m glad it hasn't been too bad.
Robin: It hasn’t.
Sunday: My phone is making me dizzy again
Sunday: So I believe that is my sign to be done texting
Robin: That's fine! I figured you’d have to go soon
Robin: I love you. Rest up ₊˚⊹♡
Sunday: I love you too. ˗ˋˏ ♡ ˎˊ˗
-Sunday has gone offline.-
Sunday plugged his phone in, and placed it back on the nightstand. He grabbed the washcloth and returned it back to his own forehead, and then laid back down. He closed his eyes. Then he tried to sleep. Around 15 minutes later he heard Welt re-enter the room. He felt the cloth be replaced yet again. Then, like his body was waiting for someone else to be around, he fell asleep yet again.