Chapter Text
Jisung sat at the dining room table beside his brother. He nudged him with his leg pushing his brussel sprouts to the side for Felix to move onto his plate. Felix takes the hint and looking toward their parents and seeing they aren’t paying attention pulls the vegetables onto his plate and pushes the potatoes to Jisung’s side for his brother to take. They had been doing this since they were kids. Jisung would give Felix the things he didn’t like and Felix would trade with what he didn’t like. But only when their parents weren’t paying attention.
“Jisung, we have set up another date for you. She is the princess of Clé so we believe that she would be a suitable partner for you.” Their mother said suddenly looking towards Jisung. Their father looks over as well. “She will be here on Friday at 4 to meet you and you will get to know each other.”
“Mother are you serious? You have already set me up on six dates in the last three weeks. Every single one of them have been awful and I’m sure this one will be as well. They are all boring and simply put, annoying. All they want is a man to do everything for them.” Jisung shoots back.
His mother closes her eyes pinching the bridge of her nose. “Jisung this isn’t a question. You will be meeting with her and you will be open minded about it. End of discussion.”
“But,”
“End of discussion”
Jisung sighed heavily and he felt his brothers hand fall on his leg. He looked up and saw the pity in his brothers eye. He shrugged silently telling him they could talk about it when they were alone again. Felix nodded keeping quiet. The family fell into silence again until their father spoke up.
“Jisung, you know as the first born you need to marry into a prevalent family and this is a good opportunity. With an added bonus of combining two flourishing nations. This will be good for you.”
Jisung felt enraged. He felt his blood boiling. He stood abruptly, his chair skidding across the floor before loudly crashing down.
“No Father, that’s not what this is about and you know it. You don’t care about what will be good for me. You care what will be convenient to you. You want to marry me off to some princess so that you can reap the benefits and you wont need to deal with me anymore. This isn’t and has NEVER been about me or what I want.” By the end of his rant Jisung was out of breath. His parents looked at him in shock. Jisung shook his head and stalked out of the dining room and to his bedroom with his parents yelling after him to sit down and be reasonable. Jisung didn’t listen to them and hurried to his own room.
He threw himself onto his bed thrashing around the sheets before pulling a pillow in front of his face and screaming. Screaming every horrid emotion he felt in that moment into the void. All of his feelings of worthlessness if it wasn’t about what he could do for his family by agreeing to be married off to some princess. Feelings of imprisonment that he couldn’t choose his own path forward. Feelings of helplessness that eventually his parents would simply stop setting up dates and would instead simply choose a woman and set up a wedding and force him to marry. Feelings of loneliness with only his brother to show him any kind of love.
Ultimately the scariest and most prominent emotion Jisung felt though was fear. Fear that he was losing the admittedly small amount of control he had at the time. If he got married to one of these women he would no longer be able to make decisions for himself. He would be expected to attend gala after gala and ball after ball with his wife hanging off his arm half listening to whatever the Earl of wherever had done that weekend. Nothing more than a trophy to prove two nations were tied together.
Just as Jisung was starting to spiral in his mind his door softly opened and Felix gingerly walked in.
“Ji?” Felix asked and Jisung felt some of the panic that had been setting in dissipate at his brothers soothing baritone voice. Jisung moved the pillow from his face and turned to look in the direction of his sibling. Felix had moved to be beside his bed and carefully sat down. Jisung immediately moved to curl around his brothers side and place his head in his lap. Felix chuckled and ran his fingers through his brothers long brown locks. Jisung sighed into the comforting feeling of his brothers hands.
“You alright Ji? Mother and Father went quite hard on you this time.” Felix whispered obviously trying not to stress his brother out. Jisung always appreciated how kind and caring his brother always was towards him.
“I think so, but I do hate how he always brings up how I have to do this and I have to do that because I’m the oldest. I’m literally older by a few hours. You just wanted to be difficult and stay in longer. He makes it seem like we weren’t in the womb together.” Jisung huffs trying to let his brother know he isn’t trying to blame his problems on Felix for not being the first to come out. Thankfully Felix understood and sighed.
“Do you ever think of running away? You know, getting out of here and trying to get somewhere that you can just… live?” Felix asked suddenly. Jisung sat up and stared at his brother trying to sense some kind of joke in his eyes. When Jisung found none he furrowed his brows.
“Lix what exactly are you asking me?” He asked slowly. When his brother simply cocked an eyebrow Jisung continued, “Because it kind of sounds like you’re asking if I want to flee the castle.”
Felix smiled. “What if I said that might be exactly what I’m asking you.”
“Felix… how?” Jisung asked staring at Felix in disbelief. His brother that had always been the rule follower, had always been the peacekeeper in the family because of Jisung’s often too prideful and bullheaded attitude. That brother who was now suggesting to Jisung that he… run away from his family?
“Well, I know a lot more about certain things around this place than you do. That is what happens when you keep your mouth shut. People stop being careful of what they say around you. I may happen to have heard father and one of the financial officers talking about the ‘safes’ father has hidden around the castle a while ago in the case of some kind of collapse, I also may have gone snooping around for them and found a couple. Father really is quite simple minded when it comes to the codes though. The ones I found were all either my birthday, your birthday, mothers birthday or their anniversary.” Felix stated like he hadn’t just told Jisung the most valuable piece of information. Jisung shot his hand out to grab onto Felix’s.
“Lix do you really think we can do this?” Jisung asked carefully
“Well it’ll take some planning but I already know the guards schedules and when we can sneak out. Though you’ll have to go on horseback or on foot, you can’t really risk taking one of the cars, you would be found in an instant. We have five days before Friday so we will have to make our plan fast.”
Jisung nodded enthusiastically at his brother who simply laughed at his excitement.
Jisung never took the time to notice things like Felix did. He always ran head first into everything from arguments to physical fights. He knew with his brother on his side it would all work out. The two boys spent every second of the next few days packing clothes and small things Jisung would need on the road into bags and making excuses to stash everything outside the walls so when Jisung got out he could find the spot and be off.
Jisung had never been more glad that his parents paid little attention to his whereabouts than these days. The closer to Friday it got the more antsy Jisung became. He and Felix did mock runs each night to make sure things would go smoothly.
On Thursday night, after waiting for everyone to be asleep Felix made his way to a few of the hidden safes he knew about taking small enough amounts out of each so as to not raise suspicion. Once he was confident there was enough for his brother to survive at least a year he slung the bag with the money over his shoulder and headed to Jisung’s room.
His brother was pacing the floor when he opened the door, his head shooting up as soon as he heard it, his newly dyed and styled curly blonde hair swishing around his face. Felix waved the bag in front of his brother smiling widely. A similar smile making its way onto Jisung’s face.
“Well Ji, are you ready to start your new life?” Felix whispered in a singsong way. Jisung nodded his head hard the smile threatening to split his face. Jisung moved the pillows on his bed around to make it look like he was sleeping so that he could possibly get some extra time before the alarms were rung of his disappearance. The note for his parents and brother laid on the nightstand. The two moved to grab the last bag they needed to bring with them and peeked out the door. Felix looked at the watch on his wrist using the light from the moon shining in through the window.
“Okay Ji, the guards will be gone for ten minutes starting at 12. We have three minutes to get into position. Levanter is already saddled up and ready to go as soon as we get to the stables. All you have to do is get out the gates and get to where we stashed everything and you’re free. We have been practicing every night to bring the bags out and it’s gone perfectly every time. You can do this.” Felix said as they made their way to the dark kitchen. The door there was the closest to to the stable and had the least chance of them being spotted.
As they made it outside they slunk through the shadows of the bushes towards the stable. This time felt so different to Jisung though. His heart felt like it was beating out of his chest, as the taste of freedom loomed closer with each step they took. Every branch broken sounding like a gunshot to Jisung’s ears, each leaf crunched underfoot sounding like a clap of thunder. Finally they made it to the stable with still six minutes to spare before the guards were scheduled to come back out. Jisung grabbed the horn of the saddle and put his foot in the stirrup. Swinging his leg over Levanter’s back he sat and pet her mane for a moment calming his nerves.
“Okay Ji, this is it. You can do this. You’ve made it this far. Just don’t forget me when you’re gone. I’m gonna miss my twin like crazy.” Felix said his voice breaking slightly with the emotion.
“Lix I’ll be coming back for you. I’m not going to leave you here alone. You don’t have to worry. I promise.” Jisung said leaning down to hug his brother. He laid a small kiss to the crown of his brothers head as he pulled away. Felix nodded.
“I love you Lix. I’ll see you soon.” Jisung said
“I love you too Jisung. Be safe out there. I’ll see you again.” Felix stated stepping back so his brother could leave the stable. Jisung grabbed a hold of the reigns and signalled Levanter it was time to move. Once out of the stable Jisung looked around carefully. He listened for any sounds. Hearing and seeing nothing he quickly made his way out the gates. Once outside the castle walls he went to where Felix stashed everything he needed, quickly attaching everything to the saddle.
He got back on the horse and sat for a moment looking up at the night sky through the trees.
“Well Levanter, for now it’s just you and me. Let’s do this.” Jisung said patting her mane. He kicked his heels lightly into Levanter’s side to indicate her to start moving. She started galloping as Jisung steered her. He had always loved riding his horse, he felt like he was free from the expectations of his parents and the people. He felt free from his life at the castle. Though this time the wind on his face had a truer feeling of freedom than he had ever felt before.
He didn’t know what his future would bring but whatever it was he knew he would meet it head on and cross each bridge as he came upon them.