Chapter Text
Louis grasped desperately at Lestat’s wrist as he was held miles up in the air by his enraged maker. He still wasn’t quite sure how exactly things had escalated to this so quickly. One minute he was pleasantly surprised to find Claudia had come home, the next he was desperately fighting for his life against his maker, who up until this moment had never hurt him like this before, nor had he seen him fly before.
“I have waited in vain, patiently waited in vain, for you to love me, as I love you,” Lestat’s eyes were wild, familiar yet strange in expression, Louis couldn’t understand what was happening at this moment, but he listened as much as he could, trying to process what Lestat was saying as his world flashed in and out of focus. He brought his other hand up to clench at Lestat’s shoulder, it was a weak hold but made him feel more secure, “Just say it, say it,”
Louis could only gasp in response, not sure what Lestat wanted him to say, his torn throat burning. When had Lestat had bitten him…and dragged him…why was Lestat doing this? Claudia had come back, and she was seeing this, what could he do to fix things? How had his chance to finally find peace with his family turn into the most violent moment they’d ever had?
“Say Lestat, I will never love you,” Lestat insisted, and Louis couldn’t. It wasn’t true, though he had trouble bringing himself to speak the words out loud, he knew life was better with Lestat than without it. He loved Lestat more often than not, otherwise it wouldn’t hurt so much when the other man was with Antoinette.
With one eye swelling shut and the rest of the world turning darker Louis whispered, “I can’t…I need…you…Les…why are…are you…doing this…Mon Cher.”
“Mon Cher,” Lestat whispered back, “Mon Cher,” some of the cold rage draining from his face, the clear blue eyes began flicking around rapidly, “Mon saint Louis, mon amour blessé, je suis désolé,” the anger in Lestat’s voice shifted to despair as he adjusted his grip, and Louis found himself pulled against the older vampire’s chest, letting him wrap his arm more securely around Lestat’s shoulder and tuck his aching face into his strong neck, hiding in the blond hair, broken arm tucked between them. (My saint Louis, my injured love, I am sorry.)
Louis felt safe as he was settled into a familiar embrace. Though he hissed in pain as his bruises and broken bones were shifted and pressed on as he was shifted into a more secure carrying hold, “Je ne pourrai jamais m'en repentir.” Lestat said as he kissed Louis’s temple. (I can never repent for this.)
“Emmène-moi chez nous, mon cher,” Louis managed to say back, it was easier to breathe now that he was held securely and not dangling precariously from Lestat’s grip on his clothing. (Take me home, my dear,)
-Louis- Claudia’s voice desperately yelled to him from her mind, -Daddy Lou, are you alive?-
-I’m okay,- Louis replied, knowing it was half a lie at the moment, he would be okay with time, Lestat would care for him. Once his maker had settled, he would get him to talk. He knew he could, especially while Lestat was feeling guilty for attacking him like this.
-No you’re not,- Claudia replied darkly and she began to yell at Lestat as he landed near their townhouse. Louis felt Lestat hold him closer, though his maker was careful not to squeeze too tightly.
“Not now, Claudia,” Lestat said to her, before whispering, “Je prendrai soin de toi, mon amour,” to Louis. (I will take care of you, my love)
“Yes now!” Claudia yelled back, “Look what you’ve done! You need to leave us both alone and let us be free! How can we possibly trust you now?!”
-Claudia, stop,- Louis spoke into her mind, he could barely see out of his right eye and his left eye was swollen shut, his throat hurt and he just wanted to lay down and get cleaned up, -There is more to this than you know,- Louis added. There was more to this than he knew as well. Something had set Lestat off, and now that he had come back to himself Louis knew the danger had passed, he could feel it in the gentle grip and hear it in his maker’s tone.
-He almost killed you,- Claudia spoke to Louis’s mind.
-He was not himself,- Louis replied, -Give us time to settle and we can talk things out. Or you may leave on the trip you wanted to go on.-
-You need to come with me before he destroys you,- Claudia replied, following as Lestat brought Louis to their room bedroom. -He treats you terribly, he keeps sleeping with that woman when you ask him not to. He doesn’t answer questions when we ask. He doesn’t respect you, he makes you melancholy. And now, when you were about to leave and be happy, he attacked you to keep you here and miserable.-
-You misunderstand,- Louis sighed, groaning softly as Lestat lowered him onto the bed before kneeling by his side, -stay in your room if you want us to talk this all out. He will tell us things now, but give us time to recover first.- Claudia frowned, Louis frowned back.
“He’s a monster,” Claudia whispered, glaring harshly at Lestat who knelt by the bed with his forehead pressed to the blankets near Louis’s shoulder, then she turned and Louis heard her go to her room and shut herself in.
“She’s wrong,” Louis told Lestat.
“Non,” Lestat shook his head in reply, “Let’s get you cleaned up, mon Saint Louis.” Lestat had red tear streaks down his cheeks.
“Please,” Louis agreed, Lestat nodded rapidly, took a gasping breath then stood and headed to the bathroom. He came back with a bowl of water and several washcloths a few minutes later. Louis could see that steam was lightly rising out of the bowl, Lestat had to have used his Fire Gift to warm it to have gotten warm water so quickly.
Lestat muttered self-recriminations in French as he gently stripped Louis of his tattered clothes and gently wiped blood from wounds and sweat away from his body. Louis watched from his one hazy opened eye as Lestat bit his own thumb and began spreading a thin layer of his blood across Louis’s still sluggishly bleeding cuts in his neck and then around his swollen eye.
“I don’t know why I can’t say it,” Louis said once Lestat had fallen silent. He was laid bare and broken before his maker, “I don’t know why I can’t say what you seem to so desperately need to hear. But know, that I feel it, I feel it every day. Please believe me.”
“Mon Amour, Mon Saint Louis,” Lestat began to sob and pressed a gentle kiss to an unblemished spot on Louis’s cheek. “Je suis désolé, je suis vraiment désolé. Je n'aurais pas dû te faire du mal. Elle a raison, je suis un monstre pour t'avoir fait ça.” (I'm sorry, I'm really sorry. I shouldn't have hurt you. She's right, I'm a monster for doing this to you.)
“No, hon, no,” Louis rasped before coughing, he had been half-starved ever since he’d started his diet of rats, and he’d lost a lot of blood in the fight with whatever had taken over his maker’s mind.
“Louis,” Lestat took a deep breath then stripped himself down as well and cradled Louis’s injured body close to his own, the warmth from Lestat’s body soothing Louis’s cooler one. For once, the nakedness seemed to be from a desire for simple closeness rather than from anything sexual, “drink from me, heal. You need real blood to heal properly, mon cher, s'il te plaît.”
Louis hesitated, he had not drunk human blood, even filtered through Lestat, in over a decade now. However, he could not bring himself to hurt his repentant maker by refusing the offered gift. That blood had already been altered enough by running through the other vampire’s veins that spreading a thin layer over his broken skin had made it begin to mend quickly. Finally, he tilted his head and gently suckled at the juncture of Lestat’s neck until he found the perfect spot, and then he let his fangs extend and bit down gently and began to drink from Lestat.
“Merci,” Lestat whispered as Louis slowly drank, small mouthfuls to draw out this moment of shared life between them. Louis had been denying Lestat this sacred level of intimacy for a long time. In trying to cling to his humanity, he had been punishing Lestat for his acceptance of his vampirism. The other man was 166, it was expected that he would have lost much of his hold on his humanity by now. Louis didn’t truly fault Lestat for what he was, he just wasn’t sure he was ready to take things that far yet. Paul’s voice spoke in his mind, making Louis question his maker’s guidance about where the lines of morality lay for him now.
“Thank you,” Louis returned, licking lightly at the wound to help it heal quicker, while not as effective, vampiric saliva also sped healing. “I know you will take good care of me, you always do.” Physically that was a true statement, Lestat always made sure Louis had everything he needed to stay physically well. Emotionally, they both had wronged each other in their years together.
“My Louis,” Lestat whispered, pulling away and running a hand down Louis’s broken arm. He did it so lightly it barely hurt, but Louis knew Lestat was making sure the bones were set straight, the last thing either wanted was for Lestat to have to rebreak the arm to make sure it healed cleanly. “Je suis désolé.”
“Je te pardonne,” Louis said, certain in his very soul that Lestat meant his sorrow over his actions, “I want you to know that I was not going to leave.”
“You were not,” Lestat’s eyes grew wide and his breath came faster, but the rage from earlier did not appear, even though it seemed to Louis that the other vampire had interpreted his words as him changing his mind.
“I still do not want to leave,” Louis assured, sighing as the blood did its job and began to heal his cracked ribs, making breathing and talking easier, “But I am tired, and don’t want to talk about everything just now. I want to rest, I want you to rest with me. Tomorrow night we can talk through the hurt between us.”
“What about her?” Lestat said, shooting a glare at the hall. They both knew Claudia was listening to them from her room. Louis was pleased to know she had matured enough to stay there. Perhaps her time on her own was good for her, he just wished she hadn’t left the way she did. He had needed closure, but that closure would not come in the form of leaving Lestat, now he wasn’t sure what the next step was.
“Some of what we need to talk about involves her,” Louis replied, “It is impossible to deny that.”
“Oui, mais,” Lestat looked at Louis, sad blue eyes staring into his own.
“We need to talk both with her and privately,” Louis asked, Lestat nodded his acceptance of Louis’s assertion.
-You shouldn’t be alone with him,- Claudia’s voice drifted through his mind.
-Lestat will not hurt me again,- Louis said, hoping Claudia would believe his confidence.
“Private,” Lestat scoffed, and Louis knew Lestat could sense their conversation, though he could not access it himself, a hint a jealousy was present in those piercing blue eyes. He and Lestat were both jealous creatures, it had caused much turmoil in their family as they hurt each other, by exploiting that jealousy from time to time.
“Either she will go hunt, or we will,” Louis offered, “But for now,” Louis took a moment to block his mind, he could not stop their daughter from listening to them, but he did not have the energy to placate both of his family members. For now, Lestat’s need for his attention and reassurance was greater, for all he had caused more physical harm it was Claudia who had come back ready to fight.
“For now,” Lestat nodded, kissing Louis’s temple as the swelling reduced.
“Read to me,” Louis requested, “ Bel Ami, ” he added, wanting to listen to Lestat’s most comfortable speech and cadences as he read a novel in his first tongue. Lestat nodded, then grabbed their robes and dressed himself then Louis before using his Speed Gift to get to the library and back quickly with the requested novel.
“Here? Or do you wish to go to coffin?” Lestat asked, his voice finally regaining the honey tone that Louis had first been drawn to. Some days he thought the tone had drawn him in because he was being hunted, others he remembered that he had never heard Lestat use that exact tone with anyone else and he knew it reflected Lestat’s love for him.
“Coffin, then if we sleep, we sleep,” Louis decided, he truly was tired and he could see echoing exhaustion in Lestat. Using Gifts often made one tired and hungry more quickly, and Lestat had used many gifts for both good and evil that night in addition to feeding Louis. Lestat nodded and gently scooped Louis up, kissing his forehead and bringing them both to settle in his coffin with the book. Louis fell asleep wrapped tightly in Lestat’s arms and listening to his soothing voice.