fights of the heart

by UneFilleAvecUnAquariumSurLaTete

Summary:

Tsukishima Kei would be really proud of the person his best friend, ex and desperate crush, was becoming if it wasn't for Tadashi's fucking boyfriend.

No seriously, he could do so much better, the guy's an asshole!

A tale of Tadashi and Kei's messy way back together.

Notes:

I am on first name basis with everyone

I no english, if you mad, you correct it

Chapter 1: chapter 1 (no fucking way i'm naming those)

"Yu should be here soon!"

Kei groaned. "Can't I have just one night out with my childhood friend without your boyfriend tagging along? You two are just going to find a corner to make out in and stay there the whole time anyway."

Tadashi gave him a knowing smile. "Yeah I know!"

The two of them mingled in the sea of college students. Kei was holding onto Tadashi's sleeve to not lose him in the house that had been transformed into a nightclub for the night. The music was loud and the lights were low. Parties like that were the perfect ground for bad decisions.

Tadashi changed a lot after getting into college. He was more confident, more himself. He had let his hair grow, bleached half of it, put on some muscle, and adopted a darker clothing style. He even got his ear pierced. He also, to Kei's dismay, found himself a brand new boyfriend.

Terushima Yuji.

Bitch ass punk, if you asked Kei. Yuji and Tadashi had been together for eight months, and they had spent seven of those arguing, fighting, breaking up, and getting back together. Kei really didn't see the appeal in a relationship like that but Tadashi swore he was happy.

It had been a while since Kei and Tadashi had gone out together and Kei was hoping for a Terushima-free evening.

"I'm being serious, I can't see you without him anymore, it's annoying."

"You know Yuji doesn't like us hanging out alone." Kei snorted.

"Well tell your controlling piece of shit boy-"

"Tsukki!" Tadashi gave him an angry look. "Cut that shit. He doesn't like me hanging out with my ex, that's pretty normal and you know it. Please play nice tonight, I don't want you two picking fights, and before you ask, yes I gave him the same speech." He rolled his eyes. "Children, the both of you."

Kei did not think it was fair to reduce their relationship to 'ex'. Sure they had dated, but they had been and still were best friends first. So no, Kei did not 'know it'.

He and Tadashi stayed a couple for almost two years. They weren't a good couple, and Kei will admit it was because of him, even though he did love Tadashi. They were young, self conscious and uneasy about being out. Kei wanted to keep their relationship from everyone, and Tadashi wanted to at least tell a couple of people. But Kei was having none of it, and he made sure everyone thought he could never be in love with his best friend. After months of pushing him away, of little mean comments, and of reprimandations for 'acting so gay', Tadashi had enough. He broke up with him right after graduation, came out to pretty much everyone and left Kei with his self-hatred.

Kei didn't even know how they stayed friends, but they did. Every attempt to go back to being a couple were immediately shut down by Tadashi and Kei had accepted that he may love Tadashi for the rest of his life, but he never actually let himself fall in love with him. After more than a year, he learned to be okay with that.
Until Terushima fucking Yuji.

Yuji looked and acted like a frat boy. He was everything Kei hated. Overconfident, cocky, untrustworthy, and he wasn't even a real blond! Kei missed the time when he could spend time with his best friend without third-wheeling.

The truth is, their friendship never fully recovered. Maybe because Tadashi got really hurt, maybe because Kei never really got over it. Maybe they just grew apart. Whatever it was, Kei wished he could make it go away.

Yuji was late again, and Kei couldn't bring himself to be mad about it. Nowadays, the only one-on-one time he could get with Tadashi was either during their short breakups or when Yuji was making Tadashi wait while he himself was doing god knows what. Truly, Kei was kind of glad Yuji was late. He and Tadashi were joking around, chatting, their old complicity was shining through. Moments like that reminded Kei why he was never going to let go of his best friend.

Yuji finally arrived and Tadashi's face lit up... until he saw why Yuji was late. Tadashi made a beeline to his boyfriend, grabbing him by the arm and leading him away from the girl he was clearly flirting with. A beautiful girl, really. Short brown hair, big tits, that's pretty much all it ever took for Yuji to have traveling eyes.

"Babe wait, it's not wha-"

"Oh no you're not telling me that you were not flirting with her! She was practically on top of you and you did nothing but smile! Is she the one you've been texting?"

Yuji gave him a lazy smile.

"She's just a friend, relax."

Tadashi had enough. The girl had already left, not interested in whatever drama was going on.

"Just a friend? Well enjoy your party, I think i'll find a friend to spend time with too!"

"Wait babe no I'm sorry..." But Tadashi was already gone.

They were making a scene. Kei braced himself for what was coming. It was always the same, if they didn't spend the whole night getting handsy, it's because they found a reason to fight. Tadashi was going to get angry, do a couple of shots, get himself really drunk really quickly. He was going to find someone to kiss to make his boyfriend mad. Then Kei was going to find him crying somewhere and comfort him. Yuji was going to find them and pick a fight while apologizing and they were either going to break up for a couple of days or go back together to Yuji's dorm.

Rinse and repeat. Kei really missed the time before all of that started.

So, trying to be a good friend, he stayed with Tadashi while he threw 7 shots of sourpuss down his throat. Kei preferred vodka and moderation.

Sometimes Kei wished he was the stranger Tadashi used to make his boyfriend jealous. Kei could show him how much he has changed since high school, He could take care of Tadashi and treat him properly. He had tried going out with other people, having meaningless sex, but in the end he was always missing the comfort and the gentleness Tadashi had given him before.

Kei was always uncomfortable when seeing his best friend making out with someone. He didn't really care that he was technically cheating on Yuji, he just didn't need to see anyone grab Tadashi's butt like that. As Kei always did, he tried to convince him to go play beer pong, or anything else, and tried to convince Tadashi to stay with him.

But Tadsahi was having none of it. This time he found Miya Atsumu, who was like a hotter, taller and meaner version of Yuji (rumor has it he was sleeping with Sakusa Kiyoomi, who thought it was hot to watch Atsumu making out with random people). Last time it was Oikawa Toru, and before that it was Suna Rintaro, and the time before Matsukawa Issei, in short, Tadashi seems to have a thing for assholes.

Tadashi was kissing Atsumu, with way too much tongue, in the middle of a crowded room. Yuji looked pissed, but he chose to go outside, probably to smoke a little, instead of doing anything about it. That's another thing Kei did not understand about their relationship. Why bother being a couple if you're going to cheat on each other and not even hide it?

Tadashi kept saying it wasn't really cheating, but Kei knew he would be devastated if someone did that to him.

Kei could enjoy the party, talk to people, get high, or even find someone for himself to kiss, but Kei instead locked himself in a closet (ironic) and held his childhood friend while he cried because of a douchebag who was currently doing jell-o shots.

Then, of course, once Yuji was done shotgunning beers, he made his way into the house, searching for Tadashi. Yuji was already pissed when he found them, apparently he had been looking for a long time. Kei was inclined to think that any amount of time is not long enough for an asshole like Yuji but it wasn't in his control, Tadashi had chosen their hidden place.

"I spen an eternity looking for you and when I finally find you, you locked yourself in a closet with your ex?" Yuji looked at them, sitting on the floor, unimpressed. "Do you know how that looks Tashi? And you give me shit for some girl I don't even know?"

"Though she was your friend..." Kei muttered. Tadashi gave him a light slap on the arm.

"What do you want Yu? Nothing's happening between Tsukki and me, you know that."

"Well, I wanted to apologize for making you sad but now I want to know what's going on with him!"

Tadashi made a very dramatic groan.

"Yuji you've checked my phone, we're always at each other's place, you know I'm not cheating on you! Why are you so defensive? Maybe I should check your phone?"
"So I need to just trust you but you want to spy on me? Yeah right!"

Here we go again. Tadashi can stick his tongue down Atsumu's throat and Yuji won't bat an eye but god forbid he and Kei spend a little time together. They got out of the closet and Tadashi followed Yuji to the bathroom to fight, or fuck, Kei never really knew, or cared to check. He almost preferred when they got along. Sure, seeing them making out is gross, but at least this way nobody is getting hurt.

It was getting late, Kei was ready to get out, hell, he had been ready to get out of this damn party. Depending on if Tadashi and Yuji were making up or not, he was either getting home alone, or with his best friend like originally planned. Kei was about to shoot Tadashi a text when we heard Yuji's obnoxious laugh. Kei raised his eyes. Yuji and Tadashi were cuddled up together on a couch, talking with some of Yuji's friends. Alone it was.

Kei's parents lived near campus, he and Akiteru had the option of staying home for college, and Kei had no interest in living in dorms. Just the thought of it gave him a headache.

The walk home was nice, it gave him some time and fresh air to sober up a little. His mom was comprehensive, but she was still a mom. Kei was pretty sure she had known he and Tadashi had been together in high school, but she never said anything about it. Just like she didn't say anything bad when Akiteru accidentally got his girlfriend of a couple of months pregnant and they decided to move in together and just figure it out. Sue was supportive like that. Truly, Kei knew he was lucky.
When he finally got home, everyone was asleep. He got inside and went to his room without a sound. Once in bed, he tried to fall asleep too but he couldn't. He kept thinking about Tadashi crying and Yuji not giving a shit.

Kei had stopped asking Tadashi why he kept putting himself through that. The answer was always the same.

"I know you don't understand, but I'm happy with him. I want someone willing to go head-to-head with me. He hurts me, I hurt him, we know we are not going to lose each other because of something stupid. He makes me feel safe because I always know what I can expect from him." And every time Tadashi says that, guilt takes Kei.
He had been the one not willing to go head-to-head with him. He had been the one Tadashi could have lost because of something stupid. He had been the one Tadashi couldn't always know what to expect from.

He's the person who drove Tadashi into the arms of someone like Yuji.

Chapter 2: Chapiter 2

Summary:

he mad lol

Notes:

i'm writing those at work in my email drafts because they blocked personal outlook accounts (aka my access to word)

my english is horrible, i hate correcting, please volonter to be my beta/corrector/slave/savior

Sunday morning was for brunch. It had been for the last two years, and it would stay like that as long as Kei had something to say in the matter.

Every week without fail, no matter the hangover or the exams week, Tadashi and Kei had brunch on Sundays. Kei really cherished this routine. Committed and scheduled time with his best friend away from college, it was nice. Well, it had been nicer before, because of course Yuji was gonna fuck it all up. Every fucking week he picked a fight with Tadashi because, according to him, those brunches were clearly dates and he had to tag along.

To Tadashi's credit, he didn't let his boyfriend come every week, just most of the time. Sometimes he would argue that he needed time with his friends and that Yuji was just insecure (which, in Kei's opinion was true) and he would go alone, fuming and putting his phone on do not disturb to better ignore Yuji's spamming. Other times, usually right after fighting or breaking up, Tadashi would go alone just to spite Yuji, posting a shitload of stories to make sure his boyfriend knew exactly where he was and with whom he was spending time with. Kei loves when that happens. Tadashi being petty was always funny.

Sadly, this week was not one of those weeks. Yuji was here, on arm spread on the back of Tadashi's chair. He was focused on his phone, ignoring them completely. Why he even wanted to be here just to ignore them was beyond Kei's understanding. Maybe it was just a control thing.

The place they chose this time was nice, with a fun edgy style and silly plate names. Their miso soup was bland but the omelets were fire. Tadashi kept saying the rice was dry but he ate a fuckton of it anyway. The prices were also so low that Kei was starting to think the restaurant may be a front for something else.

"Next time we should try a French place, I want to have bacon." Kei rolled his eyes.

Tadashi usually chose their brunching spots. He liked to try new places and Kei really couldn't bring himself to care, or to say no.

"You just want to eat dessert for breakfast, and you know all the so-called French places around here are not authentic at all, the French do not eat rice in the morning."

Tadashi shrugged. "Sure but they serve bacon, so I want to go."

"Also, I think bacon is American." Tadashi hummed at that, looking at his cellphone.

"Google says it's Chinese actually, the USA are just obsessed with it. The more you know..."

Kei shrugged. They talked a little bit about their classes, their families, old Karasuno drama, and how others were doing. And gossip. Kei loved gossip.

"Have you heard Nishinoya got fired from his job?"

"Yeah apparently he was so loud it was distracting others!" Tadashi showed no empathy, so much for being 'the nice one'.

"Pff could have seen that coming... apparently he and Asahi plan on just traveling for a while."

"Yeah I heard about that, imagine spending one hundred percent of your time with Noya... I wouldn't be able to do it. Love the guy, but he has way too much energy. It's exhausting! Even Hinata is not that intense."

Tadashi played with his food a little bit. "I have to go to the bathroom." He looked at Yuji. "I swear to god if you finish my meal while I'm gone I'm telling everyone you have a micro penis." Yuji snorted without lifting his heat from his cellphone.

"That's not what you said last night." Tadashi got up, slapping him behind the head at the same time.

Once he was sure Tadashi was long gone Yuji finally set his phone on the table.

"You and I need to have a chat." He put a piece of Tadashi's fish in his mouth.

Kei frowned.

"We have nothing to talk about."

"Oh but we do my dude. You, big guy, have a thing for my boyfriend and you need to leave him alone."

It wasn't a question, he said it like a simple fact, with a hint of challenge in his voice.

"You treat him like shit."

That wasn't an answer, he didn't even deny it but Kei wasn't going to entertain this attempt at a possessive warning Yuji was giving him.

"Do I?" Yuji smirked. "Maybe, but I think that's not for you to decide. You know I'm not forcing Tashi to do shit, he's with me because he wants to. That drives you crazy doesn't it? That even if you promise to be a perfect little boyfriend he still prefers to be with me. You can promise him everything and he still refuses to jump on your dick."

Kei hated how Yuji talked about Tadashi, how crude and sexual it was. He knows they are having sex, of course he knows that, Hell, he had sex with Tadashi too before. But the the way Yuji talked about it? Gross.

"You don't know what you're talking about. Yamaguchi is my friend and you keep hurting him. You're not good for him, that's all."

Yuji rolled his eyes and leaned forward.

"You patronize him so much. You think he's some perfect little angel I'm using for fun and sex. Sure, he gives good head, but that's not why we're together. Neither of us is shallow enough to stay together because of sex, you think so little of him. We are dating because we like each other and you have to accept that. I know you think we don't have any meaningful connection but we do talk. I know stuff about you. I know how you used to treat him, it's a bit hypocritical for you to be on my case, don't you think? I know you keep trying to break us up, Tashi is sick of that by the way. You may want to stop it." Yujji took a big sip of tea while Kei stayed silent "I also know you want him back, that's so fucking obvious. Tashi may be naive enough to think you just see him as a friend, but I see how you look at him, so back off dude. He. Don't. Want. You."

Kei looked him up and down.

"Nervous?"

Yuji scoffed.

"No I'm not fucking nervous, fuck you, I just don't like you sniffing around my boyfriend!"

"Oh yeah? So you don't care when he's being groped by Miya or fuck's knows who, but the mere fact that I exist in his proximity makes you insecure. Face it, you know I'd treat him better, and he could realize it at any moment, and that makes you shit your pretty little pants."

Yuji had enough.

"Listen here fuckface, when he kisses some rando, I know it means nothing and he's not hiding it. You? We both know you actually want him. Tadashi is my boyfriend and you need to back the fuck off!"

"Yu are you kidding me? I specifically asked you not to be a jerk! I am allowed to have friends without you throwing a tantrum, you don't own me!" Tadashi had come back just in time for the last bit of conversation.

Kei didn't really pay attention to the rest of their fight. While he would never admit it, Yuji kind of had a point. Tadashi was almost just as much of an asshole to Yuji as Yuji was to Tadashi. They both kept cheating, they both kept picking fights, and they both chose to get back together every single time. Tadashi was absolutely able, at any point, to get out of that relationship, he just chose not to. Their relationship was not and never had been an abusive one. Toxic maybe, but not abusive.

Kei had comforted himself with the idea that Tadashi was being manipulated, but he had to admit he didn't know much about his best friend's relationship. He knew their fights; he knew what was obvious, but Tadashi never really talked about their actual relationship, their good moments, their connection. Additionally, it was kind of Kei's fault. He made it so clear at the very beginning that he didn't approve of Yuji, it discouraged Tadashi from ever talking about his boyfriend in a casual manner to avoid arguing. He'll have to fix that.

He realized he hadn't been that great of a friend.

Kei looked at Tadashi doing his homework. They took the habit of working together on FaceTime in high school and they still did that sometimes. Tadashi tended to scrunch his nose when he was concentrating and it was absolutely adorable.

"Hey Yams?"

"Humm?"

"What do you like about Terushima?" Tadashi set his pencil down.

"Look Tsukki, I know you don't like him but-"

"No, no, that's not why I asked" Kei cut him off. "I just figured you guys have been going out for a long time now, and yeah I don't like him, but I'm not dating him, I don't have to like him. But you obviously do. So I'm asking, what is so great about him?"

Tadashi smiled.

"I do like him. I know you don't see it but he's thoughtful. Also he's never ashamed of me."

"So the bare minimum?" Kei couldn't help himself. Tadashi did not like that.

"Tsukki you asked, and you know damn well it's more than some other guy would do. Why did you ask if you were going to a bitch about it?"

Kei sighed.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry, go on," Tadashi smiled.

"He'll be holding my hand in public and will scream at any asshole being homophobic. He likes it when I wear eyeliner even if it gets me strange looks. He took me home to meet his parents and showed me off to his friends right when we started dating. He's also really great with gifts."

Kei let Tadashi talk for a long time. Almost all the things Tadashi was naming was things Kei did not do when they were dating, and that made him feel like shit a little bit, to be completely honest.

Kei wondered if he would even be able to do all those things Tadashi liked about Yuji. He spent so much time thinking about how he wouldn't make Tadashi sad, he had not stopped to wonder if he could make him actually happy.

"I see..."

Yuji was right. Tadashi had been right. They are happy together, even though Kei wasn't able to understand it. He wanted to ask about the constant fighting but thought it wasn't the moment, Tadashi looked so happy talking about his boyfriend.

"And, okay I know you don't really want to hear about that, but he's so gentle in bed, like I expected him to be a little rough you know? But not at all! And there's that thing he does with his thong, I can feel the piercing; it's nice. Last time he let me fuck him in the gym bathroom!" Kei responded with a gaging motion. What the actual fuck was wrong with them? He really did not need, nor did he want, to know about that.

They kept chatting for a while. About Yuji, but also about everything else. Tadashi obviously did not see Kei as anything more than a friend and trying to push himself into a romantic relationship was only going to hurt their friendship. Kei knew that.

He had some thinking to do. 

Notes:

i hope it was good, i don't remember what i wrote!

Chapter 3: chapter 3

Summary:

Kei jouney to self discovery leads to someone else discovering him

Notes:

I finally got someone to correct me!

so it's my first time writing smut, be nice to me

chappel roan in in here if you look closely

i lost like 500 words of this chapter and i had to rewrite them

"I'm going to tell mom I'm gay."

Akiteru stopped moving. He was home with his daughter for the weekend (something about mommy needing a break), and they were chatting in Kei's room.

"Like...as a bit?"

Kei gave his brother a long, unimpressed look.

"Yes, exactly. I'm going to be a dick and tell our very comprehensive mother that I am gay as a prank, to be enjoyed by no one but myself. I'm pretty sure she knows anyway."

Kei had thought a long time about it and decided that he needed to stop hiding who he was. He needed to get over Tadashi, to go out with other people without being ashamed. Also, he did think it was time to tell his family. However, he admittedly did not think very long about how exactly he planned on breaking the news. It just...came out. Literally.

"You're gay?"

"Surprise, bitch." Kei kept a straight face. He enjoyed the sight of Akiteru's panicked eyes.

"Hey, language!"

"Your kid is literally not even on the same floor as us. I'm old enough to swear."

"Right...anyway, you're gay? Since when?"

"Hm? Since birth? I was born this way, does that ring a bell?"

One of the reasons he had put off coming out to his family for so long is because he knew they weren't going to care that much, it wasn't a big deal. They were just great like that.

"So, got yourself a shiny brand new boyfriend, huh? Is that why you're telling us? Who's the lucky guy?" Akiteru asked, wiggling his eyebrows.

"No, I used to, but we broke up more than a year ago. I'm telling you because I want to, that's all." And it was true. Kei was doing it for himself and for nothing else. He didn't really know why Yuji's speech from the brunch had affected him that much, but it did, and he really genuinely felt like he needed to explore this side of himself he had been hiding for so long. He was slowly realizing that he wanted Tadashi because it was the easy option. It was what he knew, what he was used to, but he wasn't sure if his feelings were grounded in an image of a perfect Tadashi he fabricated or if they were based on genuine affection.

Tadashi deserved to be loved for who he truly is. The person for that may not be Yuji, but Kei had to admit that right now, it wasn't him either.

Another thing he needed to figure out. Later.

"Oh bummer...wait, wait, a year ago? That means you dated while in high school! Who was it? Was it the tall one with the flat hair on your volleyball team? Because that one looked gay as f-"

"Ew, gross, no! It was Yamaguchi! Of course it was Yamaguchi! How you never realized is a mystery to me." Kei said in disbelief. "But that's true, that guy does look like a fag. And I'm not even trying to be mean." (He was absolutely trying to be mean) "Kageyama really looks like the definition of a closeted faggot."

"Oh yeah, that does make sense...Lay off on the slurs would you? My kid has ears everywhere these days and I don't need her repeating that at nursery." Akiteru looked dumbfounded. "Little Yamaguchi, huh? All this time I thought you guys were working out in your room."

"Oh my god, Akiteru!"

That night, Kei decided to download Grindr. He wasn't expecting much from the app but wanted to see what the gay world had to offer, and the gay world delivered a shit load of unsolicited dick pics and a suspicious amount of very grown men looking for 25 years old to hook up with. Maybe the gay world was better offline.

"You. Want to go to a gay club?" Tadashi looked at him, flabbergasted. "You're sure you're doing okay? Do you have a fever?"

"No! Nevermind! I'll go alone!"

"No! No! I'll go with you, I think it's great for you to explore the community, but I wonder, why now? What changed?" The last questions were implied. Why not when we were dating? Why not for me? Was I not worth it?

Kei shrugged. "I don't know. I came out to my mom, I felt like it. Grinder ain't shit, and I want to go to a gay bar."

"You came out? Where the fuck was I? How did your mom take it?" Kei had a bitter smile. His coming out may very well be the only important event of the past twelve years Tadashi hadn't been a part of.

"You know my mom, she just said 'okay.' Akiteru made a bigger deal."

"Okay, I'm glad it went well. I just need you to know for the gay club, Yu will want to go with us, and-"

"And you two are gonna find a corner to make out in." Kei sighed. "It's okay, I expected as much."

Originally he had wanted Tadashi to be here for moral support, but he quickly realized he didn't need it. Once he got himself decently drunk, and he quickly found his own stranger to make out in a corner with. A club was the kind of place you couldn't really be comfortable in if you were completely sober, a bit like a family reunion. But unlike a family reunion, the club could be a blast once you loosen up a little.

Kei didn't really like to dance, but he also didn't hate the feeling of everyone being pressed against each other; feeling other people on his skin, having some wandering hands groping him, accidentally or not. He had lost Tadashi a while ago, but he didn't really care. They had agreed on going home separately. If they got home at all.

Kei quickly found someone else to grind on, and another person to buy him drinks. Kei didn't know what he was expecting, but it wasn't that. He didn't mind it though, he was actually quite enjoying the night.

Kei was having fun, kissing any stranger that was in front of him and willing. Getting tired of dancing, he made his way to a quieter area where he got intercepted by a woman covered in glitter putting makeup on people. She offered him a couple of options of different colored glitters mixed with vaseline and in his haze he let the person next to him choose the color that would suit him the best. That's not something he expected from himself but he liked it. He felt sexy with his eyelids and part of his cheeks covered in purple goo. If the glitter girl was high and if the makeup was messy, he didn't really care. He felt good. He felt free.

Gay clubs were great!

Kei continued to search somewhere to sit, without really trying to avoid people. He liked to see people, men, women and everything in between, being themself and partying like life is ending tomorrow. At some point he bumped back into Tadashi, who gave him a choked smile. Yuji also gave him a strange look Kei did not entertain. Instead of watching them make out, he chose to instead follow someone somewhere he could sober up a little.

So much for sobering up...he was at a table, sharing a joint with someone he didn't know, while another someone he didn't know was giving him a hickey when he saw someone he did know. Well, that someone he knew saw him first to be exact.

"Hey hey, Tsukki in the flesh! I never expected to run into you here!"

Kuroo Tetsuro, clearly a bit drunk but in control of himself, walked by, scaring off the hickey stranger. Kei was kind of disappointed. It was a good necking session.

"That would be me. What do you want?" Kei was feeling good, a bit too high to be completely coherent but not enough to be a turn off.

"Well, first I just wanted to make sure it was actually you, but now I kinda want to buy you a drink. You look hot!"

"Aren't you dating Kenma?" Tetsuro sighed dramatically.

"No! Why is everyone always saying that? Can't two guys be comfortable with each other and have a good friendship without it bei-"

Kei was kissing him. He didn't really know what took over him, maybe he just wanted the other man to shut up. He was usually pretty big on consent and stuff, but Tetsuro didn't seem to mind seeing as he had his hands up Kei's shirt.

"Well, someone is in a good mood." Tetsuro scraped his teeth on the lobe of Kei's ear. "Can't say I wasn't hoping for something like that to happen..."

"Shut up, and kiss me."

Kei didn't imagine himself as someone who liked a lot of tongue, but he wanted to never stop kissing Tetsuro.

They kissed in a way that should definitely be reserved for private spaces, but the weed stranger was either enjoying it or way too stoned to care. Kei had sat himself on top of Tetsuro and they were now grinding on each other. He was starting to get hard, and would have considered that a problem if he wasn't feeling Tetsuro getting just as hard too.

Next thing he knew he was being pushed in a bathroom stall. Tetsuro was kissing up and down his neck while feeling him up. Kei decided he was going to go with it. He wasn't usually the type to fuck in a public bathroom, but right now, he didn't mind. He wanted it.

"Fuck, you're so hot." Tetsuro moaned when Kei grabbed a handful of his ass. "Please let me blow you."

He nodded, not trusting himself to talk, and Tetsuro got to work. Without stopping their kiss, he undid Kei's pants and gave his cock a couple of pumps. Tetsuro got on his knees, kissing and licking Kei's body on his way down. Clearly, it wasn't his first time sucking a dick. Kei almost wanted to ask if he did that often, giving head to guys in the club's bathroom, but he quickly got distracted.

The last time he had any kind of "action" was 4 months ago. He had followed someone home after a party, and received a very mid handjob, before his partner had passed out, falling asleep. It was incredibly unsatisfying.

This was ten times better.

Tetsuro was looking at him with sinfully hungry eyes while licking up his shaft. He stroked Kei's cock slowly, taking his time at first, but he quickly lost patience and put the whole thing in his mouth. One hand on Kei's hip, the other on his thigh, Tetsuro was sucking on his dick like it was his last meal. Kei garbed him by the hair to encourage him to move, and Tetsuro fucking moaned, mouth still stuffed. Kei tried to buck his hips, but Tetsuro's grip was too strong. After that, it didn't take long for Kei to come down Tetsuro's throat. He licked his lips after, like he was showing Kei how he had swallowed everything, still on his knees between Kei's legs. Kei wanted to take a picture, so without thinking, he whipped out his phone and did it. Tetsuro was smirking in the photo.

Gay clubs are really fucking great!

Strictly sexually speaking it was good, but not great. They were both a bit sloppy from the alcohol and the weed. What had felt great however, was the feeling of being wanted, of being touched by someone he was actually attracted to. The feel of Tetsuro's hands on him, his lips, every bit of skin. The lust in his eyes. That felt awesome.

Tetsuro grabbed his face and kissed him again. Kei could taste his own sperm on his partner's tongue, and he wasn't quite sure if he found it gross or hot. Since he could still feel Tetsuro's erection on his thigh, he chose the sexier option. Kei knew he might not like the repercussions tomorrow, but he wanted to keep doing whatever Testuro was down to do, and he knew he wasn't going to regret that part.

"Do you want me to take care of you?" Tetsuro's laugh is the last thing Kei remembered from that night.

Notes:

was that okay? this fic is getting less attention than the other ones i've written and it's my first long chapter fic so i'm really nervous

Chapter 4: chapter 4

Summary:

Kei gets himself a special friend

Notes:

so this is mostly smut but it's were the drama starts

Kei did regret how fucked up he got the night before. His head was killing him, and he was pretty sure he was going to throw up. But he also came home with Tetsuro's number, (that the man put under the name 'big daddy.' Kei will have to change that, because that shit is embarrassing) saved in his cellphone.

"Call me if you feel like having fun." Tetsuro had said. And Kei had fun. He wanted more fun, so he texted him, because who fucking calls people. He didn't expect much from Tetsuro, maybe a couple of good fuck, possibly a coffee or study date a two.

"You want to take me out to go ice skating?"

What he didn't expect is for Tetsuro to ask for an actual date.

"Well yeah, I'd like to date you, if you're open to it. Not necessarily be in a relationship. I'm too busy for that, and you're an asshole. But you know, go on dates, fool around, spend time together, shit like that."

Kei hummed. He never really considered that kind of dating, but he was open to it. Tetsuro was fun, hot and Kei needed to explore other things. Also, that sounded fun and convenient.

The skating was nice, so was the dicking down he got after. Casually dating was proving to be quite enjoyable. Kei had taken Tetsuro to the museum. They had gone together to the aquarium. They had their fair share of coffee dates, and Kei realized that even if sex was part of their arrangements, it wasn't the reason he enjoyed Tetsuro's company. It looked like he was getting a new friend out of this.

He liked having someone he didn't need to impress, someone he was comfortable with. He liked having a person he saw often, keeping things casual, to not feel the need to tell anyone about it. Not even Tadashi. Something low-key. It was also nice to explore, doing couplely shit like going on walks and holding hands, things he never really did with Tadashi by fear or exposing their relationship.

"Tetsu, you're cute and all, but that paper is due on Monday." Kei wasn't even doing his homework. He was just pretending to annoy Tetsuro, and he was almost certain that Tetsuro knew it.

"Which is why you have the whole weekend to do it, so right now, you should do me instead."

Tetsuro looked at him with a mocking smile and Kei laughed. They were both in Tetsuro's tiny studio, on his bed, trying to have a study date. At least Kei was trying to. Allegedly.

"Or, hear me out. I could do it now, and spend the weekend relaxing at home away from you."

Tetsuro scoffed.

"As if you can stay away from me..." He took Kei by the waist, kissing along his jaw in an attempt to turn him on. An attempt that was working a bit too well for his academic needs.

Kei was about to give up and give in when, annoyingly, his phone ran. He reached for it but Tetsuro picked it up before him.

"It's your side chick." The phone was still ringing.

"You're the side chick." Kei answered Tadashi's call. "Hi, what do you want?"

"Is that a way to talk to your best friend you have barely seen in weeks?"

Crap. Tadashi was right. In the last month or so Kei had been busy with school and dates, he kind of forgot to spend time with his childhood friends. At least his plan to get over Tadashi was working?

"Yeah, sorry, I've been busy"

He heard Tadashi sigh. "Tsukki..." And then another voice farther. "Babe, he says he's just busy, stop overthinking it." Ah great. Yuji. Maybe he wasn't that busy if it was gonna inconvenience Yuji.

Kei looked at Tetsuro who was trying to seem like he wasn't listening to their conversation. Fuck, Kei really wanted to make him moan, but he never intended to make Tadashi feel left out and right now, and he should probably focus on that problem.

"Okay, you're right." Kei concluded. "I am actually busy tomorrow, but we'll see each other Sunday for brunch and I'll try to not push you out going forward, okay? Or I can go by your place tonight if you want to hang out?" Tetsuro frowned at that proposition.

Yuji answered.

"Great, you heard that Tashi? He still loves you, no need to come by! He's going to be busy! Tashi, say bye bye to Tsukki!"

"Yu!" And then the line cut.

"So." Tetsu requested Kei's attention. "You're busy tomorrow, huh?" Kei's thoughts immediately got back to making Tetsuro moan.

He smirked.

"Yeah, we're gonna need this time to recover from how good I'm going to wreck you. Also I do still have that paper to do."

"I thought you were doing your paper right now, and you told him you were free tonight!" Tetsuro rolled his eyes. "You're gonna have to make it up to me."

In the end, Kei pushed his paper to the last minute.

Tetsuro was obviously about to say something but he got caught by Kei's lips.

"I'll blow your mind."

"Alright then, that's pretty big talk. You should start on that soon...Oh fuck baby, I love when you do that."

Kissing Tetsuro's neck, Kei chuckled a bit which made him tense a little more.

Tetsuro likes to make out. He likes to keep things deep and slow. He likes to take his time with his partners, when sober at least.

Partners... Kei didn't really know if Tetsuro was seeing other people, he knew he himself didn't feel like he needed to, but he didn't really give a shit. Especially when Tetsuro was looking at him like that.

They kept kissing, still fully clothed. They were not in any hurry, and had all night and all of tomorrow after all.

"Kei!" Tetsuro laughed. "Kei, stop tickling me and take your pants off!" Well, maybe there was some sort of hurry.

Kei did not take his pants off, but he did removed Tetsuro's shirt. They kept making out lazily. Tetsuro had a need for more romanticism. He dragged his lips down Tetsuro's jaw, then started nipping on his neck. He loved hearing Tetsuro's moans. He continued to explore Tetsuro's chest with his mouth, giving tiny harmless bites here and there. When Kei got to his nipples, Tetsuro grabbed his shoulders.

"Ah! Baby, please don't stop! Oh, that feels good. Babe Kei, please let me touch you, let me see you."

Kei gave his right nipple a last suck.

"Do you want me to not stop, or do you want me to undress?"

Tetsuro didn't answer, kissing him instead. Kei grabbed his ass while Tetsuro worked on getting them both naked. So much for being patient.

He loved skin on skin contact, more than he expected. The heat of another warm body, the roughness of the skin, the feeling or hair against his own body. He loved it, it made him feel so alive. Other than sex, he enjoyed the closeness with another human being. And the sex was great too.

Soon enough they picked up the pace. With hot breaths and curious hands, they were both fully hard. Kei wanted to make Tetsuro feel good. He loved the sight of his face when he was rubbing the tip of Tetsuro's dick, loved the sound he made and loved the fact that he was the one responsible for Tetsuro's state.

"Either you blow me, or I'm opening you up, but we are having sex in the next 10 minutes."

"Fuck, you're hot." Tetsuro's breathing was shaky. "Fuck me."

Who was Kei to say no to that? He grabbed the lube and condoms and got to work. He placed himself on top of Tetsuro, fingers covered in lube, and put the first knuckle in while kissing him slowly. He gradually, gently thrusting, put the whole finger in, then another one. Soon enough, Tetsuro was fucking himself on Kei hand.

What a sight. Kei thought about taking another picture, but his phone was too far away and he had better things to focus on – Tetsuro's tights pressing on each end of his hips being one of them.

Kei flipped Tetsuro around, and like a rag doll, Tetsuro followed his lead. It was always fascinating to Kei how a guy like Tetsuro became so docile in bed. He started slowly, not wanting to hurt his partner, pumping his hips against Tetsuro's ass cheeks.

"Oh god, Tetsu." Kei kissed the back of his neck.

"Baby, please go harder, I promise I'm not gonna break!" Kei moaned, his grip on Tetsuro's hips got stronger. "Oh fuck, yeah, just like that, just like that! Don't stop!"

Tetsuro's sounds were muffled by his face being pressed against a pillow, and Kei almost wanted to grab him by the hair to force his head up and have all his cute little moans sounding louder. But he didn't, because he's nice. He kept the idea in mind for another time.

Kei was close, but he didn't want to stop yet.

"Tetsu, ride me."

"Fuck yeah!"

They rolled over, exchanged spots. Tetsuro looked great like that, sitting on Kei, moaning like a whore. Even with the new position, it didn't take long for Kei to feel the familiar heat of an orgasm approaching. He grabbed Tetsuro's cock and started pumping.

"Kei, Kei, Kei I'm close, if you do that I'm gonnaaaAAAaahhh–"

Kei also came not long after. Both of them were out of breath.

Tetsuro removed himself to clean up and Kei threw the condom out. They came back to the bed to cuddle.

Another good side of have a 'fuck buddy that you also date but are not dating©' (commonly called situationship) is the after care. Kei wasn't usually a big fan of physical touch, but he did like a bit of cuddles once in a while. And Tetsuro was comfortable enough to fall asleep one.

They stayed close, gently kissing, and chatting. They spent the rest of the day and the next day like that. Talking, a bit of studying, a bit of having sex, cooking, just spending time together.

Kei, even though he swore he wouldn't, fell asleep in Tetsuro's arms again.

When he noticed, Tetsuro scoffed and grabbed Kei's phone to text his mom that he was 'Kei's friend,' that her son had 'fallen asleep in front of a movie' and that he wanted to warn her to make sure she wouldn't freak out. Tetsuro wasn't about to have the damn police come to his door looking for a missing person, or worse, an angry mother.

By Saturday evening, Kei was still at Tetsuro's place. They had screwed on pretty much everything and his paper was long forgotten.

He got ready for brunch in Tetsuro's bathroom, ignoring his mom's texts asking him if he had moved out without telling her. Shit, he had forgotten to warn her. At least she seemed more amused than mad.

Looking back, he may have spent too much time with Tetsuro, especially since he has to make up an excuse every time. He didn't want to tell his mom, because she was going to get ideas. She wasn't going to be completely wrong, but he didn't need her to know that. Or her to be asking questions.

Why didn't he want to tell Tadashi he himself didn't quite understand? His ex was in a happy-ish committed-ish relationship that he shoved in Kei's face all the time. Tadashi had himself shut down any talk of possibly getting back together. They were truly just friends. Still...something in Kei prevented him from talking about Tetsuro to Tadashi. Made it feel wrong.

Maybe it was the lack of officialness that Tadashi was sure to hate? Maybe he just liked to feel like he had a dirty little secret? Kei wasn't sure, but he knew he wanted to keep things like that for now.

Tetsuro gave him a kiss on the cheek and a pat on the butt and Kei was on his way.

Tadashi, alone this time, was already there when Kei joined him for brunch.

"Where's your boy toy?" Tadashi did not laugh. "Yams, why are you looking at me like that?"

"Tsukki, is that a hickey?"

Notes:

soooooo what did ya think??? (big pleading eyes fishing for comments)

Chapter 5: Chapter 5

Summary:

They fight and they don't even kiss:(

Notes:

Yams is being immature in this one (he's gonna be a baby for a bit of time)

"I can see how busy you've been..."

Well.

Fuck?

Tadashi was not happy.

"It's not-"

"It's not what it looks like? Really? Because it sure as hell looks like you've been ditching me for your new boyfriend! Boyfriend that I didn't even know about, may I add!"

Kei took a deep breath. Maybe it was pretty close to what it looked like.

"I haven't been consciously ditching you, and he's not my boyfriend. It's new, and there's nothing to say, really. I was going to tell you if something important happened."

"But-"

"Yamaguchi, I've barely been able to see you alone since you've started dating Terushima. I think I can be excused for that one."

Tadashi sat back down and ate his goddamn bacon. They stayed in a tense silence for a while. Kei knew Tadashi was right about the ditching part, but he still thought it was pretty hypocritical for him to get mad about that. Kei knew that Tadashi was aware he was overreacting.

Kei didn't know why he felt like a kid getting caught doing something he wasn't supposed to, but he was not vibing with it.

"Are you going to bring him to brunch?" Tadashi asked, in a tiny voice.

"God, no!" Kei didn't need Tetsuro trying to pick fights with Tadashi at brunch. Brunch was sacred.

"Good."

Kei couldn't help but wonder why he wouldn't be able to bring his boyfriend (if he had one) to brunch when Yuji was inviting himself everywhere Tadashi was going. Maybe Kei misunderstood? Maybe Tadashi was just scared they were going to drift off and not see each other as much.

Kei did not misunderstand.

Tadashi had been, for lack of a better word, acting like a bitch. He was cold, snappy, and distant... Kei never saw him like that, not even when they had broken up...oh...

"Are you and Terushima okay?"

"What do you mean?"

"Like are you guys fighting?"

Tadashi gave him a strange look.

"We're always fighting."

Kei was losing his patience.

"Then did you two break up or something worse than usual?"

"No? We're doing fine. What are those questions?"

"Then what the fuck is up with you?"

Tadashi didn't answer him. He just got up and fucking left. He even forgot his backpack, and Kei had to give it back to him.

Kei did not know what the fuck was going on. It was pretty obvious that it had something to do with Tetsuro, but he couldn't figure out why.

Honestly, he was kind of annoyed with Tadashi. Kei had every right to see whomever the fuck he wanted, and Tadashi has no say in the matter. Just like Kei had no say in his decision to date Yuji. And not approving of a relationship is one thing, but Tadashi refused to talk about it. Kei was not about to run after someone who didn't want to talk. Tadashi didn't even know Tetsuro. What did he have to get mad about?! Maybe because Kei hid it from him?

After a couple of days, once the hickeys were not as noticable, it ironically got better. Kei made a conscious effort to get back into his usual routine with his childhood friend. They didn't talk about it. Kei didn't understand why him fooling around was such a sore subject for Tadashi, but he was not about to make things worse. He didn't really want Tadashi to know about it in the first place, and now that it was out, he didn't really want to talk about it.

They were texting like usual, not talking as much and Tadashi was still a bit cold, but nothing Kei couldn't live with. While he didn't really like Tadashi's attitude, he was satisfied with the current balance. Going to school, texting Tetsuro when his classes were boring, getting lunch with Tadashi, going out with Tetsuro, and avoiding his mom's questions (she was getting suspicious, he may have to tell soon he was seeing someone). Yuji was even starting to grow on him now, that he didn't feel like they were in competition. They weren't friends by any means, but Yuji turned out to be a pretty chill guy when he wasn't jealous off his ass. They had a similar mean streak, too. Talking with him could be funny sometimes. So yeah, things with Tadashi were getting better.

Until Kei brought up the forbidden subject again.

"Oh, I can't tonight. I have a date."

Tadashi demeanor immediately changed.

Fuck.

"It's okay, I'll go alone. Have fun on your date."

Tadashi really didn't seem like he wanted Kei to have fun on his date. Kei clicked his tongue.

"You don't have to see your movie alone, I'll go with you tomorrow. Also, you have a boyfriend right there with you? All the time? Just like right now?" Kei pointed at Yuji who was absolutely not listening to them.

That must have switched something in Tadashi, because he absolutely flipped his shit.

"Oh, God forbid I want to spend time with my best friend! You know you might be the kind of person to forget his friends the minute he's seeing someone, but I'm not! And I really thought I meant more than that to you, but I guess I don't know you that well! Let's go Yu, we're leaving!"

Kei blinked. "What the fuck was that?" He mumbled to himself while packing for his date.

No, but for real? Tadashi was acting like a jealous prick? It was seriously pissing Kei off. They had spent the whole day together, Tadashi had no reason to throw a fit like that. Fuck, he had been excited for tonight and now he was just mad.

Tetsuro had planned a whole night in, with a home cooked meal that was not bought at a convenience store and a new show to binge watch. Kei remembered the words 'pillow fort' being said but he had his doubts about that. Actually, he was pretty sure the night would end with slow, comfortable sex.

Times like that kind of make Kei feel like he had a boyfriend, which was not unpleasant. But he knew that as soon as finals would kick in, they would start to mutually ghost each other without any hesitation or hard feeling, and that's exactly the kind of arrangement Kei didn't know he needed until he had it. Maybe later, with someone else, he'll crave something more serious, but right now that was perfect.

He thought about what Tadashi had said. He did like what he had with Tetsuro, and of course now that he had more than one person in his life, he couldn't spend all his free time with Tadashi. That made him think, he should really get more friends... but then he would have to talk with people... ew...

He tried texting Yamaguchi about that movie he wanted to see, in an effort to reach out more, but he didn't get an answer. He would give him time to calm down, and try again later.

Tetsuro was annoyed. He had put so much effort into the night just for Kei to be distracted the whole time, because of some whiny bitch's tantrum. Tetsoro had a pretty solid theory as to why Tadashi was not happy for them, but Kei wouldn't hear any of it. Why would your ex boyfriend not want you to see anyone, now come on! Tetsuro thought it was obvious. A boyfriend, especially a boyfriend like Yuji, often didn't mean much with that sort of situation.

But it wasn't any of Tetsuro's business, and Kei had asked him to drop it, so he did. But he still had pretty strong opinions... one of those opinions being that it was his business if it interfered with the quality of his dates.

"I get to have a redo."

Kei, who was about to fall asleep, looked around, blinking away the sleepiness in his eyes. Tetsuro almost felt bad.

"What are you talking about?"

Tetsuto kissed Kei's forehead. They were loved together on Tetsuro's bed, ignoring the drama that was currently playing on the screen in front of them.

"You've been thinking about your side chick the whole time-"

"Stop calling him my side chick."

"...You've not been enjoying this date properly. I get a redo date."

Kei kissed the curve of Tetsuro's neck.

"Fair enough, sure. You want me to cook for you?"

"Absolutely not, I've seen how you cut carrots, and that is enough of seeing you cooking for a lifetime. And I want to be the one taking you on a date. I need a redo, not a compensation!"

"Okay, okay, so what do you want?"

"Are you free Sunday?"

"No, I have brunch."

Tetsuro's eyes lit up.

"I love brunch!"

"I have brunch with Yamaguchi."

"I'll go to brunch with Bokuto and Akaashi... are you free Wednesday?"

Kei thought for a moment.

"I should be, but it will have to be short. I'm babysitting for my brother in the afternoon."

"I could go with you, kids love me!"

Kei laughed.

"Yeah, because you have the same maturity level as them. She's like, four. She loves everyone, but Saeko would absolutely have my head if I bought a random guy she doesn't know near her daughter." Tetsuro squeezed him.

"I guess I'll just have to meet your family then." Kei snorted.

"Yeah, right. Is coffee on Wednesday morning enough of a redo for you?"

"Meh, I'll make it work." Tetsuro kissed Kei's forehead.

They both ended up falling asleep. When he woke up the next morning, Kei was alone in Tetsuro's bed. His glasses, that he did not remember removing, were on the nightstand next to a note.

Tetsuro often left him small handwritten notes, always on little flashcards, the same ones he uses to study with. It was cute.

Kei got up to shower. Tetsuro was gone to work, and he wouldn't be back for a while so he invited Kei to grab something in his fridge and sleep in, as long as he locked the door after him if he left. Kei realized he didn't even know where Tetsuto worked... probably somewhere nerdy, but still insanely cool for no reason, like the campus library.

Kei didn't miss Tetsuro when they were not able to see each other, but he was still looking forward to their next meet up.

He really enjoyed their coffee dates. It was casual, yet it felt intimate. There was no pressure to have sex or anything, and it really could have been a friend outing but they both knew it wasn't quite that.

"Is your little friend still acting weird?"

Kei clicked his tongue, annoyed, looking up from his latte.

"You can call him by his name. I don't know why you're acting like that, you have nothing to be jealous of. The both of you are driving me insane."

Tetsuro smirked.

"Yeah, but it's funny to make you react. So, is Ya-ma-gu-chi still being a dick?"

Kei sighed. He won't get much better than that from Tetsuro.

"I thought I wasn't supposed to think about it since that's what ruined our last date."

Tetsuro shrugged. "I'm curious. So, is he?"

"Well he's still being distant, but he says everything's fine... I was expecting him to be nosy when he found out I was seeing someone. He's such a gossip-"

"Tsukki, you're such a gossip."

"That's not the point. Yam's usually all up in my business, but he didn't even ask your name. Not that I'm complaining..."

"Face it, Tsukki. You want to talk about me with your friend, you yearn for my presence when I'm not here!"

"I hate you, I truly do."

"Tsukki?"

They both turned their heads to see a distraught Tadashi. Kei and Tetsuro had been so engrossed in their conversation they didn't see him enter the coffee shop. Tetsuro chuckled.

"Hello Yamaguchi, fancy seeing you here, we were just talking about you!"

"Tsukki, how do you know Kuroo?"

Kei frowned.

"Volleyball? Yams, we both met him in high school. What drug are you on?"

"No Tsukki, I know that. What I mean is why are you getting coffee with my TA?"

Kei looked between Tetsuro and Tadashi. His TA?

"What the fuck are you talking about?"

Notes:

Writing about friends fighting while my best friend is being a bitch to me is something I hadn't seen coming when I made the plan for this fic

Chapter 6: chapter 6

Summary:

they fight some more

Notes:

kiss kiss fall in love

"You're dating my TA." It wasn't a question, but Kei knew Tadashi expected an answer.

"We aren't really together..."

"Oh, so you're just fucking my TA. That's so much better! Oh, no actually, that's fucking worse, Tsukki!"

Kei looked around. Tadashi was screaming, they were making a show out of themselves. This was so embarrassing.

"Look, I didn't know he was your TA. I didn't even know he was a TA!"

"Oh, you didn't know! What a meaningful connection you two have!"

Why did Kei feel like he was caught cheating? He and Tetsuro had every right to do whatever the fuck they wanted! Thinking about it, whenever he was talking with Tadashi, he always felt like his relationship with Tetsuro was forbidden. Like he was somehow doing something wrong by not staying hung up on his ex that dumped his more than a year ago.

"We. Are not. Dating!" Kei didn't need to know what his hook up did for work. He didn't care what Testsuro did when they were not together.

"Exactly my point!"

"Yamaguchi, you are making a scene! Let's not yell in a fucking coffee shop! I am allowed to date whoever I want, I had no way of knowing he was your TA, I have done nothing to you!"

"Oh, so now you are dating?"

"Stop playing with my words. We go on dates, and we're not together. It doesn't matter anyway, it's none of your business."

Tadashi took a deep breath.

"You're right. We're adults, let's talk it out." He sat down in front of Kei.

Tetsuro took that as his cue to leave. He got up slowly, a bit uncomfortable.

"Well, I'm gonna let you guys figure this out...Tsukki, you owe me another redo because this..." He pointed around at them. "This is a hot mess... have a good day!"

"Hey, no, Tetsu. Wait a minute!" Kei grabbed his sleeve. "I'm mad at you too! Why didn't you tell me you were my best friend's TA?"

Tetsuro shrugged. "I don't know, honestly I thought you knew."

"How would I have known?"

"Look I don't kno-"

"Tsukki." Tadashi was sick of them. He wanted that man to leave, and he wanted to fight with his best friend. It sucked because one, he actually liked Tetsuro as an assistant teacher and two he would have to see his face every week for at least the rest of the semester, maybe more if he's unlucky.

"Right...Look, Yams. I don't really understand why you're so mad-"

"So. 'Tetsu,' huh..."

"Eh?"

"How did you meet him?"

"What?"

"You know what I mean. How did you re-meet him? I know you did'nt keep contact with him after high school, or even during high school, for that matter. So. How the fuck did that happen if you didn't meet him as a TA?"

"We bumped into each other at the club. We uh..." Maybe he should skip over that part. "It's not that deep. We had fun, so we kept seeing each other. That's pretty much it."

"So you fucked."

"Yamaguchi..."

"No, it's okay. I'm an adult, we're mature, sex is just sex. So that's it. You guys are fuck friends."

"Well...I guess...We do go on dates and stuff. We don't just fuck, and that's it."

Tadashi gave him a sceptical look.

"But you're not dating."

Kei rolled his eyes. "We go on dates, but we're not together. I told you that already."

"That makes no sense."

"It's not that complicated. We spend time together, it's fun, but there's no commitment. It's not exclusive, there's no obligation and I can just ignore him when I'm busy. It's convenient."

"That sounds horrible."

"To you. I personally think dating Terushima sounds horrible, but I respect your choices."

"You're actually quite vocal about that." Tadashi took a deep breath. "I don't like it, but I guess you're right."

"Why is it such a big deal if I'm seeing someone? I get that I didn't tell you, but you're acting like I killed someone. It's not like I haven't been hooking up before, and you knew about it, so why are you reacting like that?"

Tadashi bit his lip.

"It's different."

"Why is it different?"

"I don't know, Tsukki...I...I'm sorry..."

Tadashi was sniffing back tears. Kei grew a bit concerned, but he was still mostly confused.

"I think... I think I don't want you seeing anyone."

"Are you fucking kidding me?"

Who did he think he was? Kei was mad. Like, really mad. It was Tadashi who had been the one to break up with him. Tadashi had been the one to insist they couldn't get back together. Tadashi had been dating someone for fucking months. Tadashi had been the one claiming they were just friends and nothing else.

"What the actual fuck, Yamaguchi? Why are you so bothered?"

Fucking hell.

"I don't know, Tsukki! I guess it's hard seeing you move on after our break up."

"That's bullshit! You have a boyfriend!"

"I know! Look, I know, okay? I don't know what to tell you, I don't know why it's fucking with my head so bad..."

Kei got up. He wasn't about to listen to this shit.

"Well, figure it out. You can't just expect me to hang onto you when you don't give me the time of the day. You had no right to get mad at me, and I don't want to see you if you're going to act like that." And then he left.

Kei thought that walking would help him stop fuming, but he was still mad when he got to Akiteru's house. Kei took a couple of deep breaths. He was going to spend a nice evening with his adorable niece while Akiteru and Saeko were partying.

"Unle Ei!" His niece ran to him. Kei picked her up.

"It's Kei, can you say it? K, kkk-ei." The little girl didn't try to say shit. She just giggled and looked cute.

"Don't be mean to her!" His sister-in-law screamed from where she was getting ready. Kei's niece still had some trouble with K's and D's, but her speech therapist said it wasn't too big of a deal.

"Your kid can't speak!"

"Hey, you're here early!" Akiteru greeted him.

Now that his angsty years were long gone, Kei liked spending time with his brother. They got along pretty well, and his wife was fun. A bit exhausting, but fun. He found himself spending more time in their house than he thought he would, especially since their daughter was born.

Kei usually didn't like kids, but this one was alright. He was kind of glad to be babysitting. Toddlers are enough work to distract him from his current loss of a best friend.

It hurt, because Kei did love Tadashi. People often thought he cared less, but that wasn't true at all. Kei really cherished his relationship – whether it was romantic or not – with him. Deep down, Kei knew Tadashi had him by the balls. If Tadashi called him right now, he'd probably drop everything and join him. Well, not literally, because he currently had a baby in his arms, but it was a figure of speech. He put on a strong front, but deep down, he was a weak, weak man...a man who would take back a guy who made it clear they would never get back together, because he knew he would always love Tadashi. Always.

Kei really didn't want to lose Tadashi, but he still didn't regret what he said. He wasn't sure what made him more angry: Tadashi not wanting him to date, or potentially losing him as a friend.

They didn't speak for a while. What an uncool situation, now he had a Tadashi shaped hole in his life.

Kei made the most of it. He hadn't realized how much time he was spending with Tadashi. He could've spent that time with Tetsuro, but his mom was so glad he was home more.

"So, how is my baby boy doing? You've been sleeping over at your friend's house a lot lately..." She made a pause. "Lots of studies, I assume?"

"Something like that." She gave him a knowing smile.

"Kei, you do know that I know what a hickey is, and how they get on your neck, right? And you're not the first handsome boy I raised!" Ew. Gross.

"I don't know, mom. I don't know what a hickey is. I'm not sure what you're getting at. Can you explain it to me?" Kei faked his best innocent face. He really did not want to have the sex talk right now.

"You know, sweetheart. If you want to bring your boyfriend home..."

Kei felt the need to correct her. He didn't want to get caught in a lie and have to actually bring Tetsuro home.

"We're not in a relationship. It's uh..." He guessed he could let her believe he was in love instead of making it clear he was having meaningless sex. "We're taking things slow." She raised an eyebrow, probably hinting at the hickey. Kids these days must have a new definition of 'taking things slow.'

"Ah, young love."

Sure. Something like that.

They kept chatting. His mom wanted to know everything about his 'future boyfriend,' and Kei found himself enjoying talking about Tetsuro after all. He wasn't in love with him, and he was pretty sure Tetsuro was on the same page. But it was nice nonetheless.

Maybe one day they'd fall in love. But right now, Kei didn't need more than what they had. Kei was starting to get over his fight with Tadashi when Sunday morning arrived.

Brunch time.

For the first time since it was inaugurated, he was going to skip Sunday brunch. He wasn't feeling too great about that, if he were being honest. It felt like the solidification of their distance. Like the confirmation that something was wrong.

Kei was prepared for a lazy day of solitude. Too preoccupied to do anything productive, he was planning to lay down and read or something.

Someone knocked on his door. Kei frowned. His mom, god bless her, never fucking knocked. After a couple of seconds, Tadashi entered.

"Hi."

"Hi?"

"I-"

"Yam-"

They spoke at the same time.

"Sorry, Tsukki."

"No, go on." Kei was curious as to what Tadashi had to say.

"No, that's what I came here to say. I'm sorry, Tsukki. It was insane for me to get jealous. You don't owe me anything, but..."

Kei raised an eyebrow. Tadashi looked so nervous. It reminded him of their high school days.

"But?"

"But...I don't think I can be your friend if you're going to keep seeing Kuroo."

Kei clicked his tongue. Fucking hell, so basically nothing had changed. Great.

"And why is that?"

"Tsukki..."

"No, why did you come here? To tell me I can't date anyone if I want to stay your friend? What's going on, Yamaguchi? Why do you not want me to see Kuroo?"

"Because it hurts me too much, okay? I can't deal with it! I...Tsukki, I think I'm still in love with you!"

Kei closed his eyes.

"Is this a fucking joke?"

"No! I-"

"Yams, you have a boyfriend! You broke up with me!"

"I know that, okay? I thought I was over you, but clearly I'm not, and knowing you're with someone else– it drives me crazy! It's like before you came out, I knew you wouldn't see anyone seriously, but now that you're out, it made me realize that you're eventually going to meet people and fall in love. And that scares me."

Fuck, that was unfair. All the emotions Kei thought he suppressed, all the feelings he thought he got over – they all came back at the same time. Like a wave of love that hurt you, like a huge fucking betrayal.

"How do you think I felt when you started to date Terushima? You had almost a year to realize that, and you waited until I started to move on? You gotta be kidding me."

"I know, I know, I'm sor-"

"'Sorry' doesn't cut it, Yams!"

"I know! Look, I should have told you. I should have realized, and I wasn't fair to you, but I'm here now and I'm telling you I love you, and I don't think I ever stopped loving you, and please, that got to count for something!"

"You cannot be serious...You broke up with me!"

Kei couldn't deal with all of that. Why did shit always get so complicated with them? Why couldn't it be more simple, just this once?

"I'm serious, Tsukki. I really am serious about you. I needed time away to grow, but I never stopped loving you. Well, thought I did, but I'm not ready to lose you, Tsukki. I know I'm the one how fucked it all up, but will you give us another chance?"

Tadashi's cheeks were full of tears. His eyes were red, and he looked oh-so tired. Kei didn't know how he felt, but a part of him just wanted to hug his best friend and tell him everything would be fine.

And then Kei kissed him.

Notes:

hope is was up to your expectations.

Chapter 7

Summary:

Tadashi finally knows what he wants but he needs to get his stuff in order

Notes:

honestly it's all smut except the last couple of lines

"Oh, and fuck it."

They kissed like their lives depended on it. Tadashi felt like he could breathe for the first time in forever. It took him a while to understand his feelings towards his best friend, but he was glad he finally did it.

All the feelings they thought they had lost for each other came back. All the love, all the resentment, all the frustration – and right now, all the desire. Tadashi seemed eager, but Kei wanted to take his time. He finally had Tadashi back after all this time, and he wanted to savour him. Kei had always been a more sentimental lover.

"Mm, Tsukki..." Tadashi always loved neck kisses. He loved how gentle Kei was, he loved that he never had to worry about hickeys with him. With Kei, Tadashi felt precious, beautiful. He hadn't realized how much he missed it, how much he wanted it back.

Kei nudged Tadashi onto his bed. He needed to get closer, to kiss deeper. He grabbed his best friend's hips firmly. Careful not to bruise Tadashi, Kei needed to hold onto him, to have a sort grip on the boy he had been waiting for for so long. Kei was kissing him as if he could lose Tadashi at any moment.

Tadashi didn't kiss like he used to when they were teenagers. He was more confident, more dominant and noticeably more handsy. Kei didn't mind it. They were adults now. Still in the same childhood room they had all their firsts in, but things had changed.

"Please Tsukki. Let me take your shirt off." Tadashi was already out of breath. He wanted to get fucked like, yesterday. "Tsukki, let me touch you!" Kei clicked his tongue.

"You are so fucking impatient."

Nonetheless, he started to get them naked. Tadashi removed his own shirt while Kei took off both his pants and his boxers, all in one go. He was working on Tadashi's belt, when he asked: "How do you want to do it?"

"Hm?" Tadashi looked at him, confused.

When they were younger, Kei never offered to bottom. They tried once or twice and Tadashi liked it, but Kei, he felt it was too...gay. Kei since had worked on his internalized homophobia and did enjoy a little pegging once in a while. Tadashi smirked. He was glad Kei was really embracing his sexuality.

"I miss topping so much." Tadashi moaned. "Yu never lets me..." This has one of their more frequent subjects to fight about. Tadashi wasn't going to force his partner to do something he didn't want to do, but the way Yuji talked about people who bottomed was a bit concerning. It made Tadashi feel like shit for liking it.

"Don't talk about him while you're in my bed." Tadashi giggled, but shut his mouth.

Kei finally took Tadashi's underwear off.

He didn't mention Yuji again, but he couldn't help but compare him to Kei. Kei was taking his time kissing and making out when Yuji would have jumped straight to prep. Kei was loving, caring. Yuji was hot and straight to the point. Both were good, just so different.

"Do you want to finger me?" Tadashi nodded. He tried to answer, but the only thing that came out was a moan. He wanted everything. He wanted to put Kei's dick in his mouth, to suck his nipple, then jerk him off. Tadashi wished he could both fuck and get fucked by Kei tonight, but too much was like it wasn't not enough. Tadashi just had to hope this was not a one time deal.

Kei was on top of him, taking off his glasses to safely put them away on the nightstand. He made sure to never let them be on the bed where they could get crushed or bend, since it happened once with Tetsuro.

"I'll get the lube." He got the condoms out at the same time.

Kei laid down, letting Tadashi take more control. "Fuck, I want you!" Tadashi smirked. He put some lube on his finger and positioned himself without bothering to warm it up. Kei kissed him as the first knuckle went in.

"That's it, baby. Don't stop."

Tadashi learned that Kei was now very vocal in bed. He use to be so shy with sex, and now he couldn't shut the fuck up. Tadashi thought it was hot as hell. Good thing they had the house for themselves, because Kei was being super loud.

"Just a bit...oh! Yes! Right there, don't stop." The sound of their raspy voice with their shaky breathing filled the room.

"Oh my god, Tsukki. You look gorgeous like that."

They moaned in tandem. Tadashi didn't remember their sex life being that hot in high school.

"Yes, yes, yes...Slow down a little bit...yes, like that!"

"Baby, you turn me on so bad."

"No, no, don't go too fast!" Kei grabbed his shoulders. "Tadashi, I want to go slow, I don't want to come too fast – oh, oooh yeah, baby that's good, just like that." Kei grabbed his face to kiss him. After making sure Kei was properly ready, Tadashi put in another finger. The sinful sound Kei made was enough to keep him hard despite the lack of stimulation. Tadashi was learning the pleasures of being a giver. He'd stay like this, fingering Kei open as long as he could if it meant Kei was going to keep looking at him like that.

He looked drunk on endorphins. He looked beautiful. His blond hair was sticking to his forehead, his mouth was hanging open and his cheeks were dusted with a deep red.

Kei knew Tadashi was just pleasing him. He could feel himself being ready for a third finger but still Tadashi was going slow, pushing in and out of his hole, even adding more lube to make sure he was enjoying himself.

"Oh baby, that feels so good." Kei kissed his shoulder. "I'd tell you to go on all night but if we want to do this today – humff, Tadashi!" Kei started to kiss up and down his neck, licking as he went. "If we want to do this...ah, babe! Just get me ready!"

Tadashi changed his pace. He inserted a third finger, started going a bit quicker. Kei hadn't stopped licking everywhere we could reach. They tried to kiss but just ended up moaning in each others mouths.

"Tsukki, I'm so fucking hard!"

"Give me the condom, I'll put it on you."

Tadashi pulled his fingers out and did as he was told. Kei looked like a living wet dream. All naked and sticky with sweat, putting a condom on his hard cock. It was going to be the first time Tadashi topped in a long time. He hoped he still had it in him.

"I want to ride you." Well, that's a sexy idea. Problem solved.

Tadashi kissed Kei with passion before getting on his back. Kei didn't waste time settling himself. He sat down slowly, taking his time to get in all the way on Tadashi's dick. Tadashi took him by the hips, grinding up while Kei lost his mind.

"Tadashi, oh...humf, yeah..." Kei bent over to kiss him, but Tadashi took this as an opportunity to adjust the angle, bending his knees while his feets stayed flat on the bed. Kei broke their kiss to let out a loud moan. Tadashi loosened up his grip on Kei's hips to allow him some movement. He started a slow up and down, looking directly in Tadashi's eyes.

"Oh, fuck. Tsukki, that's good." Tadashi grabbed Kei's thighs, encouraging his movements. "Just like that, yes baby, I'm not gonna last long..." Tadashi wanted to take control and just fuck Kei until they both came, but he had the feeling Kei needed this to be slow and loving. He wasn't searching for an orgasm. He was searching for warmth, and Tadashi was going to give it to him.

"Oh, fuck!" Kei stopped moving, he was just grinding down. He felt the orgasm building up inside of him. "Tadashi, I'm getting close, fuck. I don't want to come yet."

"Do you want to switch places? Let me be on top." Kei nodded, eyes unfocused.

Gently, Tadashi pushed him on his back. Kei tried to stay close, to grab onto him with his legs but in the end he took some distance to allow the movement. Tadashi positioned himself between Kei's legs, pushing his cock in slowly, trying to control himself and not go too hard. Kei grabbed his hand for comfort even though it wasn't painful at all, not even uncomfortable.

"Fuck, baby..."

They made love gently. Kei closed his eyes, enjoying the feeling of the slow build up Tadashi was offering him. Tadashi was giving everything in him to resist the urge to simply flip Kei over and just go at it. He wanted to come so bad, but he wanted to make Kei happier. It didn't take long for Kei to reach his limit.

"Tadashi, baby I'm so close, please, please!" Kei wasn't sure what he was begging for, but he knew he wanted it. He couldn't think straight. He wanted to feel Tadashi come so bad.

Tadashi grabbed Kei's cock, still giving slow hips pumps. The gentle strokes with Tadashi quickening pace won Kei over. He arched his back, and spilled over in Tadashi's hand. Tadashi came soon after, to the sight of his best friend overstimulated on his dick.

It took them some time to come down from the high. Neither of them were in a rush to untangle themselves from each other. After some time, Kei pulled himself out, Tadashi threw out the condoms, and grabbed a couple of kleenex to wipe out the mess a little before coming back to the bed to cuddle.

Kei was about to fall asleep when Tadashi broke the silence.

"What would 'Tetsu' say if he knew?"

Kei looked at Tadashi. His jealousy was out of place considering everything, but still kind of cute. They were cuddling, fully naked. Kei smirked.

"I don't know. Let's find out."

Kei smacked a kiss on top of Tadashi's head before stretching his arm to grab his phone.

"I.. just...hooked up...with Ya...Ma...Guchi..." He said out loud while typing. "And...send." Almost immediately, they heard the sound of a notification. Kei scoffed. "He said 'about time'." He was going to put his phone away, when another notification came. "Oh, and he called me a slut. Charming."

Tadashi frowned.

"I thought he would fight a bit more for you...I mean, you're gonna stop seeing him, right?"

"I told you, we're not dating. If you and I are exclusive, of course I'm not going to see him anymore." Kei set his phone down. "Speaking of dating, how did your break up with Terushima go?" Tadashi didn't say anything.

With the lack of response, Kei looked down at Tadashi's face, who had a guilty expression.

"Yams...Please don't tell me you haven't broken up with him yet?"

"Hummmm..."

"Yamaguchi, did you or did you not just sleep with me, and asked me to stop seeing Tetsu while you yourself is still in a relationship with someone else?"

"Maybe?" Tadashi had a nervous laugh.

Kei did not think it was funny. Like, not at all. He got up and started to dress himself.

"Are you fucking serious? You gave me a whole speech about being in love with me and you haven't even broken up with him yet!" Kei squinted. "Were you even going to break up with him?"

Tadashi made an offended noise. "Of course I was going to, I just..."

"You were just going to keep him as back up in case I don't want you? Fucking hell, Yamaguchi! If you're going to make me the person you cheat on him with, at least tell me beforehand!"

"Would it have changed anything?" They were now fully yelling. "You hate him anyway!"

"I deserved to know you weren't serious about me!"

"Tsukki..." His voice was soft.

"No, Yamaguchi. Fix that shit before anything else happens."

Notes:

hope I wrote good sex

Chapter 8

Summary:

Tsukki makes some choices because yams can't do it

Notes:

In this chapter I tried to make Terushima a little bit more realistic and human

I relate to characters like that because I don't try to hide the more assholy part of myself and some poeple will talk to me like I'm a monster because I refuse to be an hypocrite so yeah being a little crass and obnoxious is not for everyone and that's okay but Yuji still has feelings

sorry for the venting, my "best friend" of 5 years doesn't want me in her life because I didn't go to university and I'm processing

anyways, hope yall like it

Tadashi did not fix his mess. Well, not quickly. Or at all, really. Actually, he might even have made it worse.

"Yams, you have to tell him. You can have both of us." Kei felt like they had the same conversation everyday. He was willing to wait, willing to be one he cheated with, but not without end, and he was still waiting for Tadashi to make good of his promises.

"I know..." And he did. He knew deep down that he wouldn't accept to be put in the position he had been putting Kei in (figuratively, the physical position he had been putting Kei in were all pretty pleasant).

"Do you? You've been saying that for weeks. I'm serious. You're telling him, or I am. I don't like being your mistress." Kei got up and threw the condom in the trash can.

Kei hated to admit that even with the current situation, he continued to sleep with Tadashi. He didn't really like it, but he consoled himself with the idea that Tadashi had promised to dump Yuji. But Tadashi had not dumped Yuji. There was always an excuse – a reason why it wasn't a good moment, a pretext to push back the task. And Kei stayed, because he was a weak man, and as Yuji had previously stated, Tadashi did give good heads. The sex was truly amazing. A bit more rough than what he was used to with Tetsuro, but it added something. Like a bit of pain made him feel how much Tadashi wanted him.

"I know, but it's hard...He's going to be sad..." Tadashi rolled over, still naked on the bed. "Hey, what are you getting dressed for? We just had sex. Come back to bed!"

Kei snorted. "You're right. Cheating on him with the guy you told him not to worry about will make him so much happier! I don't remember you being that tormented when you broke up with me..." Kei knew it wasn't true, but he was bitter. He didn't understand why it was so hard for Tadashi to just leave Yuji. "Anyway, I have to go. I have a date I'm already late for."

Tadashi got up, angry. "What do you mean you have a date? You said you were going to stop seeing him!"

"Yeah, well, that was before I learned you were into open relationships."

"I'm not? What are you-"

"Are you sure? Because you don't seem in a hurry to go down to one partner, so I don't see why I should."

"Hey, that's not fair, I'm going to leave him."

"No, you're not being fair. Not to me, and not to Terushima. You have no right to ask me to stop seeing other people, when you're still fucking dating someone else. I'm not going to give up on someone who makes me feel good to stay loyal to someone who can't even hold my hand in public." It was ironic to remember a near identical fight they had two years ago. Only then, it was Tadashi saying those words. "I'll stop seeing Tetsu when you'll fix the mess you got us into."

"Tsukki..."

"Fix. Your. Shit!" Kei slammed the door on his way out.

Kei left with anger he didn't know he was repressing before. His date with Tetsuro did make him feel better for a while, (Tadashi was not the only one with a skilled tongue) but even with Tetsuro making him laugh, Kei eventually got back to thinking about Tadashi, alone in his room.

Kei wasn't even surprised. That's probably why it hurt so much. He was not disappointed in Tadashi's actions – he was disappointed in himself for seeing it coming, and still choosing to ignore it. He felt played, he felt lied to, and even if he knew it was hypocritical, he felt cheated on. After almost a month of waiting, Kei started to believe Tadashi was never planning to break up with Yuji.

Kei needed advice. He needed someone to talk to. He tried Tetsuro, but the only advice he got was to 'dump the little bitch'... Which was not exactly bad advice, but it wasn't what Kei wanted to hear either.

So Kei did something he swore himself he would never do. He called his brother for boy problems.

"Hi, Kei! You don't usually call me, is everything all right? You're me the 'leave people on read' type..."

"I'm sleeping with two men, and one of them has a boyfriend."

There was silence on the line. Kei was about to ask Akiteru if he was still listening.

"Wow...okay, I didn't expect that...Let me tell Saeko I'll be MIA for a while, we'll get into it if you want." Akiteru shuffled around and came back on the line. "Okay, so Yamaguchi, who's still with his dude that you don't like and that guy mom thinks you're seeing, right? Do they know about each other?"

"Yeah. Yamaguchi doesn't like it, which is..."

"Humf, yeah." Akiteu snorted.

"Yeah...Tetsu thinks it's funny, he doesn't care. We're not like dating dating. It's just dates and sex, but you know, I wasn't about to tell that to mom. She thinks we're taking things slow."

"Oh boy, my baby brother has a fuck buddy. Two fuck buddies, actually. Okay, that's not perturbing at all." He made gagging sounds.

"Aki, you got your sex friend pregnant. I know you lied to mom about dating her for months, and you're the one who offered to talk about boy issues!"

"Actually, I remember offering to talk about girl problems..." Akiteru mumbled something about snitches who betray the official storyline.

"Are you homophobic?"

Akiteru clicked his tongue.

"Just tell me what's going on."

So Kei talked, and Akiteru listened. Without interruption, without judgment, he let Kei explain everything. Humming along the way to make sure his brother knew he was listening, Akiteru took everything in. The little Kei who liked dinosaurs really became an adult (who still liked dinosaurs).

"Well...even if I now know way more about your sex life than I ever thought I would, I'm glad you talked to me...Kei, I'm gonna be real with you. Yamaguchi is not treating you right. Do I think you should tell his boyfriend? I'm not sure. He deserves to know, but he also deserves to hear it from Yamaguchi. Learning it from you is kind of cruel...As for your...thing with Yamaguchi, I know you like him very much, but are you sure you want to be with him? That Kuroo guy you've been talking about seems to treat you so much better, you should give him a chance..." Akiteru had always liked Tadashi. He was a good kid. He was quite surprised by everything he was hearing. He didn't expect Tadashi to act like that, and he really didn't think Kei would entertain it... Akiteru thought Kei must really like Tadashi to put himself through that.

Kei shook his head, even though he knew his brother couldn't see him. "It's not like that between us...Kuroo's nice, but there's nothing more. There are no romantic feelings, and I doubt he would be interested even if I was."

"Okay, you and him are true fuck buddies, I get it." Akiteru sighed. "Kei, you do what you want, but you need to think about what you need, and you need to respect yourself. If you don't like the dynamic, change it, or get out. You can't just wait for someone else to do something."

Akiteru was right. Tadashi was free to do whatever he liked, but so was Kei. He couldn't stay like that. So he did the most mature thing someone could do in a situation like that, and ignored the problem.

On his side of things, Tadashi was freaking the fuck out. Kei hadn't been answering him since he told him to figure his shit out with Yuji. Tadashi knew he wasn't being fair with either of them. He felt trapped. On one hand, Yuji hadn't done anything, he felt bad about leaving him just...because. On the other hand, he really wanted to have Kei for himself again. Tadashi felt weird about going back to his ex. He couldn't ignore all the ways Kei had changed since their break up, but Tadashi could not bring himself to forget why they did break up in the first place.

Tadashi liked Yuji, he really did! Or at least, used to. He used to like how on edge their relationship made him feel. Yuji was loving in his own way. He could be cute and attentive. Tadashi used to like their dynamic, but now he just wanted to crawl back in the comfort Kei was providing. It was not like he was unhappy with Yuji – he was just happier with Kei.

Thinking about how Yuji would react was killing Tadashi. Would he cry? Would he ask for a second chance? Would he think it was his fault? Yuji hadn't done anything wrong. Tadashi didn't want to break his heart.

Tadashi really needed to make a choice. Especially since Kei wasn't willing to give up Tetsuro without confirmation that Tadashi was also faithful...which was pretty fair, even if he didn't like it. He wanted Kei to be his, and his only. He wanted that exclusive love. He wanted to know Kei chose him.

When Kei had threatened to tell Yuji himself, parts of Tadashi wanted to just wait and let his friend do the job, but he knew how cruel that would be. He needed to come clean. Yuji was eventually going to hear something about Kei and Tadashi dating and connect the dots, anyway.

That was an issue Tadashi didn't want to deal with.

After four days of Kei not responding, Tadashi was starting to flip his shit. He was debating just showing up at the Tsukishima's home again when he saw Kei walking toward the campus library. Without thinking more, Tadashi sprinted.

"Tsukki! Tsukki, wait!"

Kei rolled his eyes and turned around.

"What do you want, Yamaguchi?"

"I just want to talk to you! Please, Tsukki..."

"Have you talked to your boyfriend?"

Tadashi bit his lip. "Not yet, but..."

"Then we have nothing to talk about." Kei turned his heels so keep walking, but he was stopped by Tadashi grabbing his hand. They looked at each other, not saying anything.

"Yams, you can't treat me like that. You cannot act with me the same way you act like with Terushima. I don't want a relationship like you two have. I don't want to fight. I don't want you to leave me hanging every time there's an issue. You can't have both of us, and I'm losing patience. You've given me every excuse in the book. I'm tired of it."

"Tsukki..."

"Hey, Tashi, I was wondering where you w...what's going on here?" They both turned around in sync.

Yuji looked at them, perplexed, like he was trying to solve an extra hard math problem.

"Yu! Hmmm...I-"

"Great, you're here!" Kei shook off Tadashi's hand. "Yamaguchi needs to talk to you! I should leave! Bye!" Kei finally left for the library.

"Babe, what's going on? What is he talking about?"

Tadashi took a deep breath, not meeting his boyfriend's eyes. "Yuji, I... I need to tell you something..."

Yuji laughed. Oh, Tadashi was going to miss this laugh.

"Haha. 'We need to talk'. Babe, are you breaking up with me?" Yuji was joking, but he had no idea how spot on he was.

Tadashi's eyes were fixed on the floor.

"Tashi...Why are you making that face? Tadashi, are you breaking up with me?"

Tadashi looked at his soon to be ex boyfriend. "Yuji, let's go take a walk."

Notes:

one thing that I miss about fanfiction.net is the mean comment, if there was something to improve, trust that someone would tell you, here everyone is so nice I don't know i my fic is actually good or if nobody want's to break it to me

Chapter 9

Summary:

Big sad for the unloved

Notes:

for anyone wondering, the situation with my ex best friend (who's also been my roommate for the last 3 years but I'm moving in a couple of days, that's why the chapter is early) is not getting better, she's a bitch. Girly pop opened one of my box

Tadashi was nervous as hell, but he had to do it. He had to tell Yuji the truth. The whole truth. He owed it to him. Yuji hadn't been a bad boyfriend. At least, not as bad as Tadashi had been.

Yes, he was a flirt, and yes, they were fighting all the time, but Tadashi never had genuine doubts about Yuji's love.

They were walking in an awkward silence. Tadashi waited for them to be somewhere semi-private before trying to talk. He hesitated for a long time, not sure of how to start the conversation.

"So... uh..."

"Tadashi, it's so obvious that you're breaking up with me. Just tell me why." Yuji looked sad. Like, really sad. Tadashi had never seen his boyfriend cry, and frankly, he hoped it would stay that way.

They had broken up a million times before, but Yuji could feel this one was different. They would usually just get carried away during a fight, knowing full well they would be back together in a matter of days, sometimes even hours. Tadashi had never before taken him on a walk to talk. That was super strange. And the fact that they were doing good these days made the threat of a break up even more surreal.

Tadashi bit his lips, scared to say something clumsy and to hurt Yuji more than necessary. Break-ups were always hard, but breaking up with someone you like, even if there's no love anymore, is even harder.

Last time with Kei, there was resentment acting as fuel to Tadashi's decision. Yuji was different.

"It's not your fault–"

"It's not you, it's me? Really, Tashi? Don't you think I deserved a bit more than that?" Yuji looked so vulnerable. His eyes were pleading, like he was wishing for this whole thing to be a tasteless prank. Behind all that hurt, Tadashi could see a hint of anger. A bit of 'I told you so' dancing inside of Yuji. "Be honest with me. What changed?"

"You're right, sorry. But you really didn't do anything wrong!" Tadashi felt like he was handling everything badly.

Yuji avoided his eyes. He didn't want to see the truth on Tadashi's face.

"Yeah, right, so everything was perfect. You just stopped wanting to be with me overnight? I don't believe that."

Yuji was trying to put a confident act on, but he was on the verge of tears. He knew most people didn't see it, but Yuji did care for Tadashi. So, so much. He also knew he had some issues to fix, but he thought they were good together. He really didn't see the break up coming. He wasn't stupid. He knew their relationship wasn't a 'forever' kind of deal, but he wasn't ready to let go. Not yet, not now.

Tadashi took a big breath. "Okay, but I want you to remember that I did love you, and I do care about you, 'kay?" Terushima nodded, a bit weary of what was coming next. Just the fact that Tadashi was talking about his love in the past tense was heartbreaking. "So uh... Tsukki started seeing some guy, and I got really jealous, and I didn't really understand why–"

"Are you fucking kidding me? Fucking Tsukishima is the reason you're breaking up with me?"

Of course it was because of Tsukishima fucking Kei! Yuji felt like he should have known. Hell, he did say he felt like Kei had feelings for Tadashi, but he chose to trust his boyfriend and here he was, getting dumped for a tall, lanky asshole! He felt so blindsided. He felt played. He never had a chance.

"Yu–"

"You're dumping me so you can go back to your ex? Oh my god, I can't believe I trusted you when you said you guys were just friends now. This is so fucking stupid!" Part of him wished Tadashi lied to him, and told him they were breaking up because his dick game had gotten weak or something. "I told you I don't trust him! You promise me it was nothing! You promised me he wouldn't take you away from me!"

"Yu, listen, it happened so fast! I didn't mean to get this far, I just–"

"Wait, what do you mean? Did you sleep with him?" Yuji felt as if he was hit with a bunch of shameful bricks. This was so humiliating.

"I–"

"You fucking whore, I fucking knew it! You're such a dirty little fucking liar!" Anger took the place of sadness in Yuji. This wasn't just Tadashi letting him go. It was betrayal, a break of trust of the worst kind.

"Yu–" Tadashi looked so guilty. Yuji understood before anything was said.

"Oh my fucking god, I can believe you! How long have you been cheating on me? Huh? Since the start?" Horrific scenarios popped up in Yuji's mind. How many people knew? How long had Tadashi been mocking him? "I can't believe you!"

"Yuji!"

"I have a right to know how long you've been lying to my face, Tadashi!" The idea that Tadashi had been going behind his back the whole time was nauseating.

"I... uh, a month..."

"A month? A month! Oh my god, I'm so fucking blind! I am so fucking stupid! So for a month you told me you loved me, you had sex with me, and you acted as if everything was fine, meanwhile you were fucking him behind my back?"

"Yuji, I–"

"Who else did you cheat on me with?" Yuji's brain invented pictures of Tadashi with random people, with people he knew and liked. Images Yuji desperately hoped were not real.

"Nobody! Yuji, I would never-"

"You would never? That's fucking rich, Tadashi.You cheated on me! Who the fuck else have you been screwing behind my back?" Yuji laughed. A dry laugh that brought no warmth and no comfort. The laugh of someone trying not to hurt.

"No one!" He was about to argue, but he resigned himself. "You're right, I'm sorry."

There was nothing Tadashi could say that would make up for what he did. Nothing he could do would erase what happened.

"I... Tadashi, did I not love you right? I know we had our moments, but fuck Tadashi, I love you! That's not enough for you?"

"Yuji, I told you. It's nothing you did. I really liked our time together, I'm just..."

"Jumping on another dick? Yeah, I gathered that!" Yuji wanted Tadashi to hurt. He wanted his ex to be just as hurt as he was. "Such a slut..."

"Yuji! That's not..." Yuji looked at him, expecting answers. "What happened is that I didn't want Tsukki to see someone else, and when I understood why, I didn't want to tell you because you don't deserve that, but–"

"I don't deserve to be dumped, but I deserved to be cheated on?"

Tadashi was chewing the inside of his cheeks, looking anywhere but Yuji.

"I tried to talk it out with Tsukki, and it just happened..."

"So you only cheated on me once?" The hopes Yuji had were quickly destroyed by Tadashi's panicked face.

"Well..."

"Fuck, Tadashi. Next time you want to break up with someone, do it before sucking someone else's dick!" Yuji was done with this conversation. This whole situation felt so unreal.

"I know, I know! I'm so sorry, Yuji."

"Well, I don't care that you're sorry! You're a fucking bitch ass slut, and I don't want to see your face ever again! I hope that your precious Tsukki knows he can't trust you. Hell, I hope he cheats on you with someone he swears is just a friend! Don't come back crying! Fuck you!"

Yuji was about to slap Tadashi, but he stopped himself at the last minute, and just ran away. Tadashi felt bad, obviously, but at the same time, he felt like a weight had been pulled off his chest.

Yuji didn't know what to do. A part of him just wanted to find Kei and beat him up, but he knew doing that would only affect him negatively in the long run. Yuji couldn't believe his cheating ass ex and his homewrecker of a friend, now boyfriend, would get to shamelessly date while he would have to be the only loser in this whole thing. God, did he want to hurt them.

Yuji skipped class that day, to spend it almost completely in the gym. Working out helped him to get his ideas right. He had to move on from Tadashi. He was worth more than an unfaithful bitch, anyway.

"Wow, calm down big boy. What's happening? What got your panties in a twist? Trouble in paradise?" Tetsuro stopped him mid rep. He was a TA at their school, and he often worked out at the same gym Yuji worked out at. They weren't friends, but they got along pretty well.

"You could say that... Apparently, the little whore was cheating on me." Yuji didn't stop his exercise while talking.

"Ouch. Sorry, man. Good riddance, bro."

Yuji scoffed. "Oh, yeah, you can say that. He got back with his ex, you know? Swore they were just friends. Fucking hated the guy. 'Tsukishima'... what kind of fucking pretentious ass name is that?" Tetsuro paled.

"Tsukishima as in Tsukishima Kei?"

Yuji gave him a strange look. "Yeah? You know him."

"Well, that explains it." Tetsuro massaged his eyebrows with two fingers. "Oh, fuck man, I didn't know. If I did I would've told you I swear."

"Kuroo, what are you talking about?"

"Tsukki had been my regular dick appointment until like twenty minutes ago. He just called things off. I knew he was sleeping with his best friend, and I knew the best friend had a boyfriend, but I didn't know it was you! I'm so sorry, man..."

Yuji took a sharp breath. Tetsuro wasn't at fault, but Yuji couldn't shake the knowledge that if Tetsuro and Kei had never started hooking up, Tadashi would've never realized his feelings for Kei, and he would still have his boyfriend. It was a flawed logic, and he knew it, but he was just so mad.

"Look, man. I know it's not your fault, but I really don't want to see you right now."

"That's fair bro, I understand... "

Tetsuro walked away. He shoot Kei a last goodbye text, and deleted the contact. Things like what they had were good while they lasted, but they were never meant to last long. Both he and Kei knew that.

After their talk, Tadashi kept walking for quite a long time. Part of him was mad that Kei had put him in a position where he was forced to come clean. but he knew it had been the right thing to do. He didn't want to jump straight into Kei's arms. It felt tacky, even with all that had already happened.

He was going to wait at least an hour.

All things considered, the break up could've been worse. Sure, Yuji got mad, but who wouldn't in a situation like that? He felt guilty. Of course he felt guilty, but there was very little he could do, except trying to do better with Kei, so all that hurting wouldn't be in vain.

Tadashi knew he was used to a specific dynamic with Yuji, and that wasn't something he could or wanted to recreate with Kei. He took bad habits he wanted to get rid off. Kei was funny. A bit mean, but no longer in a cruel way. He was gentle and attentive. Tadashi wanted to be a partner worthy of Kei's love.

All of this was a mess. A bunch of big and little mistakes. Tadashi finally called Kei after calming down.

"Hey."

"Hey."

They were both feeling uneasy.

"I called things off with Tetsu."

The question was pending. Did you do your part, Tadashi?

"I think Yuji hates me now."

"Well, you did cheat on him." Once again, Kei didn't say the important part out loud. I would hate you too if you did that to me. Tadashi understood anyway.

He understood why Kei was anxious, but Tadashi hoped they would be able to build a strong and solid relationship.

Notes:

only one left! Just a little conclusion...

Chapter 10

Summary:

all is good... or almost

Notes:

so this is the end!! I pretty happy about how this turned out.

"Oh, look who it is! The greatest whore I've even known, and his tiny little cock sleeve!"

"I'm taller than you."

Yuji was really fucking drunk. Maybe a little bit high too, but strangely coherent for his state. He was barely able to stand up, with a mostly empty red solo cup on his side. He looked like he had a rough night already, and it was only 11 PM... Tadashi wondered what he used to like in someone who looks like the most stereotypical douchebag ever. A true frat boy.

It was a wonder how Tadashi and Kei didn't run into him sooner, but it was bound to happen. Half a year after their break up, Yuji was screaming at Tadashi in the middle of a house party. Kei could remember Yuji getting in a similar state each time he and Tadashi would publicly fight.

They hadn't talked to each other since the break up, not even to get their stuff back (Yuji's sweatshirt was still at the bottom of Tadashi's wardrobe and Tadashi's t-shirts were long gone to a donation center). Tadashi had hoped that they'd stay civil. Maybe even cordial to each other, but Yuji seemed to have other plans. He had been hurt more than anticipated, and had expressed his anger in the form of insults. Deep down, Tadashi thought it was a small price to pay for what he had done.

"I've got a new girl, and she's so much hotter than you!" He was slurring, pointing to a generic corner of the room where his alleged girlfriend must be. That was a new one. When he was trash talking, Yuji usually just repeated all the synonyms of 'slut' he knew. Tadashi was pretty sure he was called a harlot once.

Kei smirked. "Happy to hear that. Now you can stop obsessing over us."

If Tadashi and Yuji had avoided each other, Kei and him would've had the misfortune of having a class together. Tadashi heard that they liked to get into petty arguments when crossing each other. Tadashi was almost sure Kei did that on purpose.

"Fuck you, I wasn't talking to you! Get out of my face!"

Tadashi let Kei handle the situation on his own. He looked like he was having fun, anyway. Tadashi instead searched for alcohol, keeping an eye on the two blonds fighting. Time passes. Boyfriends change, but some things stay the same.

"Oh, what is it? You don't want to see me? Do I remind you that your precious 'Tashi' chose me over you? I guess your game just is not that good if I could steal him so easily."

Kei knew he was being immature, but Yuji's angry reaction was worth being childish a little bit.

"Shut the fuck up, 'Tsukki'," Yuji said the nickname as if it was the greatest insult. "Don't forget he dumped you for me in the first place!" That wasn't true. There were months between Kei and Yuji the first time around, but that didn't seem to matter for either of them.

"Yeah, and he came running back asking for more. So again, how good can you be?"

"Okay. Both of you, enough. Leave me out of your dick measuring contest." Tadashi screamed from afar but the heart wasn't in it. Tadashi didn't want to get involved in their petty fight, but he had to admit, it was funny to watch. He just wanted to pretend that he tried to stop them.

At the sound of his voice, Yuji turned to him.

"You! Fuck off! You fucking slut!"

"Hey now, don't talk to him like that. It's not his fault you couldn't satisfy him."

"You say that, but you don't know how good he used to scream my name. You can pretend it never happened, but he and I both know what's up. He can break up with me, but he can't unsuck my dick."

"What the fuck does that even mean... He can't un-cheat on you too. Does your so-called hotter girlfriend know that you're still in love with your ex? Because you of all people should know how that feels to be with someone who never really loved you back."

"You piece of shit. You're just jealous!"

"Jealous of what? That I got your man?" Yuji looked at him as if Kei had cursed his entire bloodline.

"You know he told me how much of a fucking prude you are!"

Kei gave him a cold smile. "I was 17. What's your excuse?"

"I'm not a prude, you fucking prick!"

"No?" Kei looked at him with fake concern. "Did you get over your fear of taking it in the ass, or did you just think I didn't know about it?"

"Fuck you!"

"Ah yes, great come back. I'm bored of this." Kei looked at Yuji with a mean smirk. "'Tashi', babe. Let's go get a drink." Tadashi tried to contain his laughter. Kei using the nickname Yuji gave Tadashi back when they were together was the last drop for Yuji. He stormed off spouting obscenities.

"You don't need to be this mean to him, Tsukki." Tadashi said, once they were out of earshot. Tadashi had lost a lot of his toxic couple habits when he switched boyfriends, but he did keep his cockiness, and Kei loved it.

"I know, but it's fun."

Tadashi smiled.

"You're impossible."

They kept mingling, drinking, and meeting up with old friends. Tadshi focused his time on some of the guys from Karasuno that had somehow found himself at the same house party. Tadashi was mainly chatting, not drinking that much, and not noticing just how much Kei was.

"Tadashi, baby." Kei wasn't one for public displays of affections, but right now, decently buzzed and more than appropriately horny, he desperately wanted Tadashi to kiss him back. Kei, who was pressed to his boyfriend's back, started slowly grinding while Tadashi kept talking with his friend, not giving any signs that he noticed Kei's attempts to get him hot and bothered. "Tashadi, please, let's get out of here..."

The friend laughed. "I think someone is a little desperate for your attention, Yamaguchi."

Tadashi smirked. "Yeah, isn't he adorable?"

He said something else after that but Kei was frankly not paying attention. All of this was terribly out of character for Kei, but he felt adventurous tonight. He wanted Tadashi and he wanted him now. He started to rub his hand on Tadashi's hips, over his jeans. Slowly going up and down his waist, shy fingers going under the shirt. Tadashi giggled when Kei started to pepper his neck with soft kisses. Kei wasn't paying attention to what was going on around them, but he vaguely noticed the friend leaving. He focused on the quickening pace of Tadshi's respiration, on the little sounds he wasn't able to silence. Kei got bolder. He didn't care who saw them. Love bites that slowly evolved into public necking. Kei dragging his teeth over Tadashi's earlobe finally made him snap.

"We should find somewhere private." He breathed. "Before you actually get in my pants in front of everyone." Kei didn't waste time pulling Tadashi into a bathroom.

"I'm going to destroy you." He bent Tadashi over the sink.

"Huhummm..." Tadashi chuckled, he liked when Kei left kisses along his spine while preparing him. "Did you seriously bring condoms?" He stayed put, following Kei's instructions.

"And lube, yes. You look so good like that..." Kei inserted two fingers at the same time. The fit was tight, but they didn't have time to spare. Kei was so fucking hard. He started to pump his fingers, searching for Tadashi's prostate. "God, I want to fuck you so bad."

"You're impossible."

Tadashi liked it when Kei got impatient like that. He was being more rough, more possessive. He was having the time of his life getting fucked in a stranger's bathroom, looking at his blissed out face in the mirror.

"Oh fuck, Tsukki!" Kei had inserted himself in one go. It burned a little bit, but the pain made Tadashi even hornier. He started leaning into Kei's thrusts. "Oh, yeah. Keep going... just like that."

"Yeah, little fucking bitch thinks he can do better that me." Tadashi felt a particularly strong thrust. "If only he could see you like this, begging on my dick." Kei looked into Tadashi's eyes through the mirror. "I should send him a picture of you just to show how much better I treat you. You won't have to cheat on me ,that's for sure.

"I can't believe you – hngh, fuck, can't believe you're jealous... aaah!"

"Say it, Tadashi. Tell me I'm the best you've ever had."

Tadashi laughed. "You are so fucking possesive."

Kei grunted. They usually made sweet love, slow sex that made them both feel like rag dolls by the end. But right now, it was about chasing their orgasms. They kept going at it, not caring if anyone heard them. Tadashi was so close, and he felt Kei's grip getting harder, and he knew relief was not far. Tadashi's moans got louder and more frequent, just as Kei's grunts got stronger. He felt so good, he was so close.

Just then, the door opened – and no other than Terushima fucking Yuji appeared. "Oh, you've got to be kidding me!" Behind him, a short brunette with a huge rack made a disgusted face before turning around.

Tadashi was about to stop, but Kei just started going harder, and he had no choice but to take it and moan. At first, he was a bit panicked at the idea of having sex after getting walked on by his ex, but the thrill wasn't unpleasant, and Kei's dick game was pretty convincing. Find something a horny man wouldn't do for a good fuck. Tadashi felt so good he forgot about his ex watching them, that he didn't even notice Kei giving Yuji a wink.

Not long after, he came hard, white splashing on the vanity. He felt drained. Kei pulled out and took care of the mess. Getting dressed was very quick, given they barely got undressed in the first place.

"You are so fucking impossible." Tadashi smiled at the kiss he gave Kei. They both chucked, in a silent agreement to wait until they got home for round two.

At first, Tadashi was scared that things wouldn't work between him and Kei, and that all that hurt would have been for nothing... But his relationship was better than before. They were good for each other. They trusted one another, but they also had their wild side. They completed each other, and Tadashi couldn't ask for more. He was happy he had found the right asshole for himself.

Tadashi was worried that his new confidence and the way he had grown wouldn't match Kei, but he forgot that Kei had grown as well. They found that they were good together, now more than ever. There were still hiccups, fights, and need for compromise. Tadashi had to adapt to a new style of relationships. With Kei, he couldn't pick a fight, kiss someone else and expect everything to be fine the next day. That simply would not fly. He had to learn new reflexes, new habits. Kei also had his doubts. Since he saw first hand how easy it had been for Tadashi to cheat on Yuji, Kei thought it was reasonable for him to be scared of Tadashi cheating again. But he had known the man for a long time, and they agreed a relationship should be built on trust. They were making things work. Slowly, but surely.

They kept enjoying the party under Yuji's angry stare. Things were definitely not perfect, but they were good. They were happy and that was all that mattered.

Except Yuji. Yuji would have to wait a little bit to find his happiness, but that was okay – the day will come.

Notes:

Feel free to let me know your thoughts, even the bad ones, it's always pertinent to have diverse opinions, but I hope you liked it!

Don't cheat, or if you do, be smarter than Yams!

Notes:

heyy, hope you liked it, and even if you didn't (in that case, why did you finish it, you have free will) i still want to know what you though.

I amost exclusively write this shot at work.

I'll update every two weeks

[My Bluesky]