Chapter Text
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I blink.
I breathe.
I scream.
It is an oddly peculiar feeling to not only see the life leaving you (as evidenced by all the blood pooling around me), but to also feel your heart pumping sluggishly as though it’s trying to make up for all the blood haemorrhaging out of you but not being able to do anything about it.
Case in point—me.
I—well, there’s nothing to say about me. Or well, the me before me.
Fuck, I’m making such a mess of this. I’m aware that I’m not making a lot of sense, but I promise you I will in due time.
So. Back to the point. Me—haemorrhaging. It really was a stupid reason.
See, I’d had an argument with my mother. Something stupid, I don’t remember. Anyway, I decided to say, ‘fuck it’ and wander around a part of town she never let me go by myself.
And then I got myself stabbed. Yeahhhh, I think I can see why she hated me going out to that particular part of town by myself. Goddamn it.
The next thing I was aware of was cold. Not the darkness I anticipated. Not Heaven (or Hell). But cold.
Clinical cold. Hospital cold.
I don’t know why it shocks me, except that I’m quite sure I was somewhere warm before I was expelled out here. Which doesn’t really make sense considering the fact that I was dying out in the cold and one of my last memories before I arrived here (wherever the fuck here is) was my hands going numb out of sheer coldness.
Before I can ruminate on that thought, and why I’m quite certain that I was cocooned somewhere warm and dark—
Someone slaps me—slaps me somewhere unmentionable.
I blink.
I breathe.
I scream.
I hear voices. It all sounds foreign—musical, almost, and I can’t understand a single word. It sounds like I’m underwater, and like my ears are filled with water, and quite frankly: like I don’t know what’s going on.
I’m freezing. I’m wet—or well, I’m not wet but rather am covered in something that I’m trying my hardest not to think about.
I’m moved from person to person, and the fact that I can be carried like this, as though I was not a full-grown adult, but something in need of protection, as though I was something frail made me scream harder.
I’m sponged down, no longer as sticky and feeling a great deal warmer than I was moments ago. It occurs to me then that I was naked. No wonder I was cold.
I feel indignant. Scared. Overwhelmed.
Really, all I want to do is go to sleep, and figure out what the actual fuck is happening later, once the confusion and tiredness and overstimulation ends.
So that’s what I decide to do. My screams (my cries) peter out until I’m almost hiccoughing, and I’m finally bought to rest on someone’s arms, and bought up to their chest.
It soothes me almost instantly, and at this point I can’t be bothered to figure out why.
The last thing I hear before I finally sleep is, “Félicitations, c'est une fille!”
My last thoughts are ‘Am I a fucking reincarnate?’
