Chapter 1: jackie taylor and the great lesbian intervention
Chapter Text
jackierabbit created "team group chat!! :)"
jackierabbit has added ss.shipman, taiturner, vantheman, nat_the_scat, and fleetwoodlottie to the conversation
Saturday, September 19, 2:06 P.M.
jackie 🍓
hey guys!!
taissa ⚽
Jackie, what is this?
van 🔥
YO WHATS GOOD CHAT
lottie 🦌
jackie why am i here
SHAUNA ❤
Jackie why did you make a whole ass group chat we already have one of those
SHAUNA ❤
And if it’s for the team why didn’t you add the JV kids
jackie 🍓
well I just wanted an actual official gc?
jackie 🍓
plus the JV girls don’t count ok shut up
taissa ⚽
I hate to agree.
taissa ⚽
This is probably a lot better without Mari.
van 🔥
WHEEZING NOT HER
lottie 🦌
why mari??
lottie 🦌
she didn’t do anything to u
taissa ⚽
She’s annoying as shit.
SHAUNA ❤
I mean I agree but they’re not all bad???
SHAUNA ❤
Akilah’s in a bunch of AP classes with me
SHAUNA ❤
And Melissa doesn’t seem too bad
van 🔥
oh lawd have mercy not the hat lesbian
lottie 🦌
wait she’s a lesbian?
van 🔥
lottie she’s always wearing a fucking backwards cap
van 🔥
I know a lesbian when i see one
nat 🚬
jackie what the fuck
nat 🚬
i just woke up
nat 🚬
what is this 😭
jackie 🍓
it’s a group chat natalie
jackie 🍓
did you even read the title?
nat 🚬
yeah it makes me sick
nat 🚬
here
nat_the_scat changed the group chat title to “BUZZ BUZZ BUZZ 🐝”.
van 🔥
no let her cook this is a vibe
jackie 🍓
great now we’re all gonna seem like crackheads
SHAUNA ❤
Jackie let her be
jackie 🍓
ugh FINE
nat 🚬
wait can i add someone?
jackie 🍓
uh i guess?
nat_the_scat has added africangrey to the conversation
taissa ⚽
Oh my God, Natalie.
misty 🍄
heyyyyy guys!!! ( ╹▽╹ )
jackie 🍓
hey misty!!!!
ss.shipman to jackierabbit
Saturday, September 19, 2:17 P.M.
jackie 🍓
SHAUNA BE NICE
SHAUNA ❤
NO
SHAUNA ❤
WHY WOULD NAT ADD HER
SHAUNA ❤
SHES GONNA TALK ABOUT BIRDS OR SOMETHING I'M GOING TO DIE
jackie 🍓
RELAX OH MY GOD
jackie 🍓
it’s just Misty
jackie 🍓
yeah she’s annoying as fuck but i don’t think she’s gonna try to actually TAKE US OUT or something
SHAUNA ❤
I don't fucking put it past her
fleetwoodlottie to BUZZ BUZZ BUZZ 🐝:
Saturday, September 19, 2:19 P.M.
lottie 🦌
IF NAT GETS TO ADD SOMEONE I DO TOO
taissa ⚽
CHARLOTTE, NO.
van 🔥
NOT HER PLEASE GOD
SHAUNA ❤
Funny you should mention god…
jackie 🍓
shauna stop that
jackie 🍓
lottie please i beg
misty 🍄
Who are you guys talking about? 😀
nat 🚬
CHARLOTTE ISOBEL MATTHEWS IF YOU ADD HER I WILL SEND A NUCLEAR BOMB TO YOUR EXACT COORDINATES
lottie 🦌
LMAO TRY ME BITCH
fleetwoodlottie added jesuslovesyou to the conversation
laura lee 😇
Hello girls!!
laura lee 😇
I hope you’re all having a blessed day!
misty 🍄
Oh yeah, totally! ^_^
laura lee 😇
What have you all been up to?
taissa ⚽
Well, I’m working on the French essay right now, and maybe after I’ll get all that precalc homework done.
van 🔥
I GOT MY DRIVERS LICENSE!!!!!!!!
van 🔥
I CAN DRIVE US TO TACO BELL NOW
nat 🚬
idk stuff
lottie 🦌
oh not much!!
lottie 🦌
just a lot of doodling, i’m thinking of doing a mural or something if my parents wouldn’t kill me for it
misty 🍄
I’ve been hanging out in my garden! :)
misty 🍄
Botany really is such an interesting field!
misty 🍄
Did you know that the Puya chilensis captures and consumes other animals for nutrients? 😁
lottie 🦌
oh cool
lottie 🦌
anyway
lottie 🦌
just a lot of blessed stuff all around
SHAUNA ❤
I wouldn’t call reading Lolita all day very blessed but I’m doing pretty well
jackie 🍓
omg hi laura lee!!!
jackie 🍓
it’s soooooooo nice to hear from you!!
jackierabbit to ss.shipman
Saturday, September 19, 2:22 P.M.
jackie 🍓
THIS GROUP CHAT HAS GONE TO THE DOGS
jackie 🍓
IM SLEEPING ON THE HIGHWAY TONIGHT
SHAUNA ❤
OKAY PLEASE DONT
SHAUNA ❤
Maybe you can sleep at my house
SHAUNA ❤
I promise I won’t make you sleep on the highway
jackie 🍓
…really?
SHAUNA ❤
I mean I guess
SHAUNA ❤
I'll ask my mom if you ask yours
jackie 🍓
OMG OF COURSE!!!!
SHAUNA ❤
It is Shabbat tho so I’m just warning you
SHAUNA ❤
My grandparents are going a little crazy
jackie 🍓
I DONT CARE
jackie 🍓
I LOVE YOU
jackie 🍓
MWAH 😘
SHAUNA ❤
You’re welcome Jackie.
jesuslovesyou to BUZZ BUZZ BUZZ 🐝:
Saturday, September 19, 2:25 P.M.
laura lee 😇
Thank you so much Jackie! It is wonderful to hear from you too
van 🔥
wsg blondie
laura lee 😇
Hello, Vanessa! 🙂
laura lee 😇
Can you please tell me what “wsg” means?
taissa ⚽
Whatever.
taissa ⚽
Van’s being stupid.
van 🔥
HEY
van 🔥
YOURE SO MEAN
laura lee 😇
Oh, hello, Taissa!
taissa ⚽
Hello.
laura lee 😇
And hello Natalie! I didn’t see you there!
nat 🚬
hey
laura lee 😇
Thanks for adding me, Lottie!
lottie 🦌
no prob ll
jackie 🍓
OKAY GUYS
jackie 🍓
as we all know, nationals is coming up pretty soon
taissa ⚽
“Pretty soon”
taissa ⚽
Jackie, it’s in like a month and a half.
van 🔥
tai bffr we all know youve been plotting this for MONTHSSSS
van 🔥
that’s why u were on allies ass for like two weeks
SHAUNA ❤
Oh my god PLEASE don’t bring up Allie
laura lee 😇
That freshman girl?
SHAUNA ❤
Yes :/
laura lee 😇
What has she done wrong?
laura lee 😇
I don’t think she’s been too mean to any of us.
misty 🍄
yeah!! I mean she’s not a better winger than natalie ofc
misty 🍄
but she doesn’t seem too bad!
van 🔥
she doesn’t fit the 10000000 percent perfect standards of taissa audrey turner
van 🔥
a cardinal sin
taissa ⚽
Van, if you don’t shut up, I will murder you.
van 🔥
no u wont
van 🔥
because you loveeeeeeee me
taissa ⚽
I really don’t.
van 🔥
you REALLY do
van 🔥
sososososo much
nat 🚬
i can feel the sexual tension through the screen
lottie 🦌
no fr
nat 🚬
take it to the private dms
lottie 🦌
make out already
van 🔥
LMAOOOOOOOO WHAT
taissa ⚽
What are you two even talking about?
van 🔥
THATS SO CRAZY LOL
taissa ⚽
Van and I don’t like each other.
van 🔥
NO LITERALLY
van 🔥
LIKE WHY WOULD YOU SAY THAT
taissa ⚽
Where did you even get that from?
SHAUNA ❤
Do we really have to do this now????
laura lee 😇
Am I missing something here?
misty 🍄
nope!!!
misty 🍄
i don’t get it either laura lee!!! :)
laura lee 😇
Oh thank goodness!
jackie 🍓
BACK ON TOPIC HELLO?
jackie 🍓
tai and van get a room
jackie 🍓
but anyway
jackie 🍓
nationals!!!
van 🔥
YO WHAT
lottie 🦌
lmao get rekt
nat 🚬
oh my god lottie shut up
nat 🚬
you sound like a fucking five year old
lottie 🦌
lol so now you’re making fun of me again?
nat 🚬
get a life matthews
lottie 🦌
get a job???
nat 🚬
oh great so now you’re getting classist??
van 🔥
NAT THAT WAS LOW
lottie 🦌
you’re the one making this classist
lottie 🦌
i didn’t say anything
lottie 🦌
i was just trying to talk and here you are
lottie 🦌
getting mad at me for nothing
nat 🚬
how about you wake up
nat 🚬
this isnt one of ur manic pixie dream girl fantasies
SHAUNA ❤
I am so tired of you all atp
jackie 🍓
OH MY GOD CAN WE RELAX???
misty 🍄
why are we arguing all of a sudden??? :(
laura lee 😇
Girls please!!!
laura lee 😇
Please apologize to each other
lottie 🦌
lmao yeah right
nat 🚬
over my dead fucking body
taissa ⚽
How can you guys switch between being best friends and arguing so quickly?
van 🔥
NOW whos seeing sexual tension thru the screen
SHAUNA ❤
Omg Jackie
SHAUNA ❤
What if we were actually onto something?
jackie 🍓
abt what
jackie 🍓
OOOOOOOOHHHHHHH
jackie 🍓
SHAUNA HOLY SHIT
jackie 🍓
WE WERE RIGHT
nat 🚬
huh.
lottie 🦌
about what? 😀
SHAUNA ❤
Don’t look at me
jackie 🍓
nothing importanttttttttt, its fineeeeeeee
laura lee 😇
Am I missing something again?
misty 🍄
i think we're both missing something lollllll
laura lee 😇
I'm sure we'll figure it out at some point!
misty 🍄
Oh me too!!! (ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*.✧
nat 🚬
never do that again
misty 🍄
Sorry nat!! <3
lottie 🦌
christ leave misty alone
lottie 🦌
you fucking added her
van 🔥
IM ROLLING ON THE FLOOR LAUGHING
taissa ⚽
Get up.
van 🔥
yes maam 🫡
nat 🚬
you all are fucking insane
nat 🚬
especially you matthews
lottie 🦌
oh get fucked scatorccio
jackie 🍓
yknow i was gonna try and get us back on nationals
jackie 🍓
but i think were too far gone atp
jackie 🍓
so im just gonna say please practice and prepare for the game
taissa ⚽
All right.
van 🔥
U GOT IT CHIEF
misty 🍄
i’ll be cheering you all on! (☆▽☆)
nat 🚬
alr
lottie 🦌
yeah np jackie :)
laura lee 😇
Of course!!
laura lee 😇
I will be praying for our success!!
nat 🚬
yeah im sure you will
SHAUNA ❤
You know I will Jackie
SHAUNA ❤
We can train together if you want??
jackie 🍓
OH MY GOD YESSSSS
jackie 🍓
LOVE U SHAUNY
jackie 🍓
😘
jackierabbit to ss.shipman
Saturday, September 19, 2:30 P.M.
jackie 🍓
btw did your mom say yes?
SHAUNA ❤
Yeah
SHAUNA ❤
Did yours?
jackie 🍓
HEHHSHSHEHHEHSHE YESSSS
jackie 🍓
so i’ll see u tonight, maybe i can come over at like 5:30?
SHAUNA ❤
Sounds good
jackie 🍓
YAYYYY see you!!
SHAUNA ❤
<3
vantheman to “BUZZ BUZZ BUZZ 🐝”.
Saturday, September 19, 2:51 P.M.
van 🔥
WAIIIITTTTT
van 🔥
do yall maybe wanna go to the mall tomorrow??
van 🔥
my mom wont be home and i can drive us now
taissa ⚽
Yeah, I’m free.
van 🔥
GREAT i can pick u up????
taissa ⚽
Okay.
lottie 🦌
omg i would love to!!
lottie 🦌
would you mind driving me too?
lottie 🦌
my dad’s got the car tomorrow for some business meeting
van 🔥
oh u got it kween
SHAUNA ❤
I should be able to come
SHAUNA ❤
Jackie?
jackie 🍓
yeah totally!!! :)
jackie 🍓
we can drive ourselves there btw, dw
SHAUNA ❤
You mean I’m gonna be driving you there?
jackie 🍓
shhhhhhhhhhhh
van 🔥
also misty and ll, you can come too if you want
misty 🍄
EEEEEEEE of course!!!!
laura lee 😇
My mother said yes!!!
laura lee 😇
My brother should be able to drive me
taissa ⚽
We can meet there around noon?
SHAUNA ❤
Can do
jackie 🍓
got it!!!
nat 🚬
sorry i cant come
misty 🍄
AWWWWWWW why not? :(
lottie 🦌
she’s too cool for us thats why
nat 🚬
have you ever considered i have better things to do
nat 🚬
shocker i know
lottie 🦌
i never said that
lottie 🦌
i’m just saying it wouldnt kill you to hang out with us
nat 🚬
if i had to hang out with you i would kill myself
lottie 🦌
jesus christ okay
jackie 🍓
guys please
jackie 🍓
nat it’s fine if u dont wanna come
nat 🚬
yeah i fucking know its fine
van 🔥
AAAAAAAAAANYWAYYYY see u then 😎
nat_the_scat to travmartinez
Saturday, September 19, 3:02 P.M.
rat girl 🤡
have you ever hated a girl so much you start having violent dreams about kissing her
travis 👾
natalie what the fuck
travis 👾
im trying to sleep
rat girl 🤡
it is LITERALLY three in the afternoon
travis 👾
it’s saturday
rat girl 🤡
sleep is for the weak idfc
travis 👾
you need serious help
travis 👾
what the fuck is up
rat girl 🤡
ANSWER THE QUESTION
travis 👾
oh that
travis 👾
uh
travis 👾
no not rlly
travis 👾
maybe you just likeeeeeee her
rat girl 🤡
i dont
travis 👾
u sure
rat girl 🤡
yes im sure
travis 👾
like what kind of violent kissing
travis 👾
like the freaky kind
travis 👾
didnt know you got down like that nat
rat girl 🤡
NO NOT LIKE THAT JESUSSSSS
rat girl 🤡
more like she'll be there
travis 👾
in the dream
rat girl 🤡
yes in the dream dumbass
rat girl 🤡
and i'll get angry and then its all angry
travis 👾
okay so by "dreaming about violently kissing her"
travis 👾
you mean just making out
rat girl 🤡
ig that's a better name for it
travis 👾
okay so that's not normal
rat girl 🤡
so what do u think it means
travis 👾
I DONT FUCKING KNOW IM NOT A THERAPIST
rat girl 🤡
jesus
rat girl 🤡
if u bring this up again i will fucking castrate you
travis 👾
mind telling me who she is
rat girl 🤡
no
rat girl 🤡
go back to sleep
travis 👾
well now i cant
travis 👾
ur bullshit gon keep me up
rat girl 🤡
stop making fun of me for five minutes
rat girl 🤡
i dare you
travis 👾
jesus
travis 👾
look do you wanna come over tomorrow?
rat girl 🤡
rare travis martinez w
travis 👾
sybau
rat girl 🤡
jokes on ur hoe ass
rat girl 🤡
idk what the fuck sybau means
travis 👾
shut yo bitch ass up
rat girl 🤡
OH EAT SHIT TRAVIS
travis 👾
if u see javi looming through the halls just leave him alone
travis 👾
hes getting bitchy bc dad took away his xbox
rat girl 🤡
is ur dad gonna be home tomorrow
travis 👾
if he is we just take the car keys and go to ihop or something
rat girl 🤡
sounds like a plan
rat girl 🤡
see u then
vantheman has added jackierabbit to “girlkissers official gc”.
Saturday, September 19, 7:48 P.M.
van 🔥
hello jacqueline taylor
van 🔥
this is an intervention
jackie 🍓
AN INTERVENTION FOR WHAT???
jackie 🍓
and WHAT is the gc title
taissa ⚽
VAN DON’T START IT LIKE THAT
taissa ⚽
Let me try.
jackie 🍓
TRY WHAT????
taissa ⚽
Jackie, are you in love with Shauna?
jackie 🍓
WHAT NO???
jackie 🍓
SHAUNAS MY BEST FRIEND
jackie 🍓
WHY WOULD YOU SAY THAT
lottie 🦌
WELL DONT START IT LIKE THAT EITHER TAI
lottie 🦌
look just let me do the talking
taissa ⚽
That sounds like an awful idea.
van 🔥
tai just let her cook
jackie 🍓
guys WHAT is going on
jackie 🍓
im literally at a sleepover with shauna rn
lottie 🦌
yeah so about that
van 🔥
i’m giggling
lottie 🦌
jackie yk how we’re all like
lottie 🦌
lesbians
lottie 🦌
right?
taissa ⚽
Oh, and THAT’S a good way to start it?
van 🔥
TAI PLZ 😭
jackie 🍓
yes ik that?
lottie 🦌
well its just that recently
lottie 🦌
our gaydars have been noticing some things
lottie 🦌
about you
taissa ⚽
And Shauna.
lottie 🦌
yes and shauna
van 🔥
very very specific things
jackie 🍓
are you guys saying u think me and shauna are gay for each other
jackie 🍓
because if thats the case ur wrong
jackie 🍓
like totally off the deep end
lottie 🦌
NONONONO
lottie 🦌
we’re not SAYING anything!!!
taissa ⚽
I am.
taissa ⚽
I’ve BEEN saying this shit.
van 🔥
all IM saying is
van 🔥
my gaydars going crazy
jackie 🍓
wdym crazy
van 🔥
see it sees you
van 🔥
and it sees shauna
van 🔥
and it starts going
van 🔥
BINGBINGBINGBINGBINGBINGBONGBOPBOOMBADOOPBADOOPBABINGDING
van 🔥
like gay noises
taissa ⚽
Gay noises?
van 🔥
gay noises.
lottie 🦌
see so my gaydars kinda doing that too
lottie 🦌
not the same noises but similar
taissa ⚽
Mine isn’t exactly going CRAZY
taissa ⚽
But it is picking up on something.
jackie 🍓
yeah so all your gaydars are wrong
jackie 🍓
theyre fucking broken
jackie 🍓
go get them fixed
taissa ⚽
I promise you, they’re fine.
van 🔥
our gaydars are never wrong ms taylor
lottie 🦌
no sometimes they are separately
lottie 🦌
but together they’re foolproof
jackie 🍓
but they’re wrong
jackie 🍓
i literally have a boyfriend
taissa ⚽
Yeah, well, we’ve all been there.
van 🔥
i haven’t
lottie 🦌
this is basically that scene in that gay 90s movie where we bully you into admitting you’re a homosexual
taissa ⚽
You mean “But I’m A Cheerleader?”
jackie 🍓
OMG I LOVE THAT MOVIE
taissa ⚽
That’s a sign.
jackie 🍓
I PROMISE YOU ITS NOT
jackie 🍓
IM NOT GAY I LITERALLY DONT KNOW WHY YOU THINK I AM
lottie 🦌
alright jackie let us ask you some questions
van 🔥
ill start 🫦
taissa ⚽
Oh, Jesus Christ.
van 🔥
do you actually like jeff?
van 🔥
like do you like making out with him and hooking up with him and stuff
jackie 🍓
uh i guess?
jackie 🍓
it’s not bad but it’s a little boring
jackie 🍓
but like thats how kissing is supposed to be right?
van 🔥
loud incorrect buzzer
taissa ⚽
You see, Jackie:
taissa ⚽
Kissing is actually supposed to be fun.
jackie 🍓
ok well maybe jeffs just a bad kisser
lottie 🦌
that’s not what randy walsh said
van 🔥
oh????????
taissa ⚽
My turn to ask a question.
taissa ⚽
Jackie, have you ever actually liked a guy?
taissa ⚽
Not because you “have to,” not because you’re dating him, not because you’re being pressured to or feel like you’re supposed to
taissa ⚽
Have you ever genuinely been interested in a guy?
jackie 🍓
oh god
jackie 🍓
i don’t think i actually have
jackie 🍓
but maybe i just havent found the right guy yet??
lottie 🦌
OOOOOH MY TURN MY TURN
lottie 🦌
jackie where’s shauna rn
jackie 🍓
uh next to me on the couch why???
lottie 🦌
ok now look at her
lottie 🦌
like REALLLYYYYY look at her
jackie 🍓
ok i am
taissa ⚽
You think she’s pretty, right?
jackie 🍓
ofc i do
jackie 🍓
shes sososososososo pretty like gorgeous
lottie 🦌
now you said you don’t like making out with jeff
lottie 🦌
but would you ever want to make out with shauna?
jackie 🍓
well yeah duh
taissa ⚽
Jackie…
van 🔥
JACKIE WHAT 😭
jackie 🍓
I THOUGHT THAT WAS NORMAL BEST FRIEND STUFF???
taissa ⚽
Honey no
van 🔥
DENIAL IS A RIVER IN EGYPT 💀💀💀💀
van 🔥
GIRL IN WHAT WORLDDDDD IS MAKING OUT W UR GIRL BSF STRAIGHT
jackie 🍓
I DONT KNOW???
jackie 🍓
I DIDNT THINK IT MADE ME GAY
lottie 🦌
well not just making out!! the stuff u do with jeff too
lottie 🦌
like holding hands romantically and going out on dates
van 🔥
and fucking
lottie 🦌
shut up van
lottie🦌
but yes that too
lottie 🦌
would you wanna do that with shauna
lottie 🦌
have you thought about it
jackie 🍓
wait.
taissa ⚽
Uh huh.
jackie 🍓
WAIT.
lottie 🦌
therreeeeeee we go we got her
van 🔥
HAJAHSHAHSHAJSHAH YESSSSS JOIN US JACKIE 😈
taissa ⚽
About time.
jackie 🍓
IM A LESBIAN?????
jackie 🍓
OH MY GOD
jackie 🍓
IM ACTUALLY A LESBIAN
lottie 🦌
ok relax dont hyperventilate
jackie 🍓
IM IN LOVE WITH SHAUNA OH NOOOOOO
jackie 🍓
WHAT DO I DO
lottie 🦌
right now? dont do anything
lottie 🦌
take your time
taissa ⚽
Get some sleep, Jackie.
van 🔥
and join the club ✂
Chapter 2: shauna "idiot bisexual" shipman strikes again
Summary:
this time on "loser sapphics," we have a mall day, minor jeff sadecki appearances, arctic monkeys vinyls, lottienat progression, and major bisexual awakenings/revelations. travis is also at the beach for some reason.
Notes:
not entirely sure where I'm going with this fic, so I'm just making it up as I go along. anyway, enjoy this filler!
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
travmartinez to liljavi.m
Sunday, September 20, 9:27 A.M.
travis 👾
youre hovering again
javioli
wut
travis 👾
javi i can literally hear your loud ass chewing that gum from here
travis 👾
spit that shit out
javioli
nuh uh
travis 👾
yuh huh
javioli
nuh uh x2
travis 👾
you sound like a cow
javioli
u meanie
javioli
i bet ur texting natalia or something
travis 👾
HER NAME IS NATALIE YOU DUMB CUNT
javioli
I’M TELLING DAD
travis 👾
NONONONONONO DONT
travis 👾
ILL BUY YOU PEEPS
javioli
Fine.
javioli
but get me the yellow chick ones
travis 👾
what do you want javi
javioli
:)
javioli
i need you to take me to the beach with my friends today
travis 👾
EW FUCK NO
travis 👾
WHAT FRIENDS EVEN????
javioli
Cody and Kevin
travis 👾
lmao nope
javioli
why not??
travis 👾
because your friends are nasty
travis 👾
cody shits himself and kevin looks like the koala from sing
travis 👾
and they both pick their nose
travis 👾
AND EAT IT
javioli
but they invited me to the beach + i wanna go :(
travis 👾
its too cold for the beach dude
javioli
please?
travis 👾
no javi
javioli
you have to
javioli
if you don’t i’ll tell dad about all the times you snuck natalie over
javioli
AND i’ll tell him about that time you and your friends did mushrooms in the yard and you ate that pine cone from the tree
travis 👾
fine
travis 👾
i hate you
javioli
i love you
travis 👾
never do that again
javioli
sorry
travmartinez to nat_the_scat
Sunday, September 20, 9:31 A.M.
daddy issues #2
hey so
daddy issues #2
im gonna have to cancel our illegal ihop run
daddy issues #2
sorry
nat 🚬
NOOOOOOOO
nat 🚬
WHY
daddy issues #2
javi is forcing me to take him to the beach
nat 🚬
the fucking BEACH?
daddy issues #2
the fucking beach
nat 🚬
travis
nat 🚬
its september
daddy issues #2
yeah i tried to use that
daddy issues #2
hes a stubborn little shit
nat 🚬
why dont u just
nat 🚬
say no
nat 🚬
ive seen you whoop his ass before
daddy issues #2
he threatened to tell dad about homecoming
nat 🚬
the pinecone thing??
daddy issues #2
yeah and other stuff
nat 🚬
oh 💀
daddy issues #2
yeah 💀
nat 🚬
that sucks
daddy issues #2
tell me about it
daddy issues #2
all his friends are gonna shit up the fucking ocean
daddy issues #2
and im gonna be forced to hang out with their white middle aged moms
nat 🚬
prayers bro prayers 🙏
daddy issues #2
sorry for just dipping out
nat 🚬
nah its ok
daddy issues #2
do you have anything else you can do today
nat 🚬
i dont think so
nat 🚬
wait actually
nat 🚬
i do
nat_the_scat to “BUZZ BUZZ BUZZ 🐝”.
Sunday, September 20, 9:37 A.M.
nat 🚬
yo
redhead disease 🧡
yeah wsp
nat 🚬
is it too late for me to come to the mall w the rest of u guys
nat 🚬
orrrrrrrr
misty quigley (send help)
Of course not!!!
misty quigley (send help)
We’d love for you to come!!!!
redhead disease 🧡
yeah sure!
vans girlfriend????
Yeah, you can come.
vans girlfriend????
I think we have some room.
redhead disease 🧡
oh fs we do
spawn from hell 👹
omg ur coming out of your cave
spawn from hell 👹
/J /J PLEASE DONT KILL ME
nat 🚬
no promises
nat 🚬
just promise i wont have to watch you and laura lee make out or something
vans girlfriend????
Uh, what?
jesus freak
Excuse me?
redhead disease 🧡
NAT HELP WHAT
spawn from hell 👹
nat literally what are you talking about
nat 🚬
what are YOU talking about
jesus freak
Natalie, you know Lottie and I broke up, right?
nat 🚬
you did
spawn from hell 👹
yes??????
spawn from hell 👹
we’ve been broken up for literally months?????
jesus freak
I can promise you Lottie and I will not be making out anytime soon, haha
spawn from hell 👹
no literally????????
thing 2 (shauna)
How are you THAT out of the loop
thing 2 (shauna)
Even I knew that
nat 🚬
yeah bc jackie updates you on everything
thing 1 (jackie)
lol guilty
spawn from hell 👹
no because im just flabbergasted
spawn from hell 👹
how did you even think that
nat 🚬
can u shut ur big fat mouth
misty quigley (send help)
Jackie are you ok??? ( ≧Д≦)
thing 1 (jackie)
uh yes ofc
thing 1 (jackie)
why???????
jesus freak
You seem a lot less energetic than usual, is all!
nat 🚬
what she means is
nat 🚬
youve lost your whimsy
thing 1 (jackie)
my what
spawn from hell 👹
the bounce in your step
redhead disease 🧡
your twinkle and your sparkle
thing 1 (jackie)
i have that?
nat 🚬
you most certainly do
thing 2 (shauna)
Guys Jackie’s just kinda tired
thing 2 (shauna)
We had a sleepover last night
redhead disease 🧡
yeah about that
redhead disease 🧡
lottie tai
vans girlfriend????
Yes?
spawn from hell 👹
mhm
redhead disease 🧡
should we go check the
redhead disease 🧡
yk
redhead disease 🧡
the thing
thing 2 (shauna)
literally what are you talking about
vans girlfriend????
Not you.
Thing 2 (shauna)
What the fuck
spawn from hell 👹
not you either nat
nat 🚬
what the FUCK is going on
redhead disease 🧡
super cool hot person shit that you wouldnt understand
nat 🚬
oh so youre admitting tai is hot
vans girlfriend????
UNRELATED.
vans girlfriend????
Let’s go.
jesus freak
I’m going to assume Misty and I aren’t included, either?
misty quigley (send help)
I’m assuming not!! (^^)
thing 2 (shauna)
Fuck this
nat 🚬
SHAUNA WAIT
vantheman to “girlkissers official gc”:
Sunday, September 20, 9:46 A.M.
van 🔥
jackie
jackie 🍓
yeah
jackie 🍓
is this about my whimsy again
lottie 🦌
kinda
taissa ⚽
It’s just that it’s been a while since your whole…revelation
taissa ⚽
And we just wanna check in
jackie 🍓
on me?
van 🔥
no ur mom
jackie 🍓
look i dont need a fucking check in you guys
jackie 🍓
im fine
lottie 🦌
jackie…
van 🔥
jackie?
taissa ⚽
Jackie.
jackie 🍓
OKAY FINE
jackie 🍓
IM HAVING A TOTAL FUCKING MENTAL BREAKDOWN
lottie 🦌
i knew it
taissa ⚽
That’s why we’re here, Jackie.
van 🔥
yeah were here to be ur emotional support homies
jackie 🍓
SHAUNAS MY BEST FUCKING FRIEND
jackie 🍓
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO ACT NORMAL AROUND HER NOW????
lottie 🦌
just try and stay calm
lottie 🦌
act like u usually do around her and just try not to rush into anything
taissa ⚽
Yeah, exactly.
taissa ⚽
I know it might seem hard, but if you stress yourself out like this, you’re going to go crazy.
van 🔥
try and see the good in this
van 🔥
pretend ur in a friends to lovers booktok romance
van 🔥
stop trying to make it a problem and itll stop being a problem
jackie 🍓
wait one sec
jackie 🍓
im getting a call
mrjeffsadecki to jackierabbit:
Sunday, September 20, 9:48 A.M.
jeff 💩
hey babeeeee
jeff 💩
would you maybe wanna hang out today?
jeff 💩
like go to the movies or smth
jackie 🍓
oh god sorry i can’t!!!
jackie 🍓
i’m going to the mall with my friends today, but we can hang out another time!!! :)
jeff 💩
would it kill you to spend some time with me
jeff 💩
like literally any at all
jeff 💩
jackie??
jeff 💩
whatever
jackierabbit to “girlkissers official gc”:
Sunday, September 20, 9:50 A.M.
jackie 🍓
its jeff
jackie 🍓
OH GOD WHAT AM I GONNA DO ABOUT JEFF
lottie 🦌
be so fr
taissa ⚽
Jackie, you know what you need to do.
van 🔥
BREAK UP WITH HIM!!!!!!!
jackie 🍓
BUT I CANT
jackie 🍓
THAT WOULD BE SO MEAN
taissa ⚽
Jackie, which is meaner:
taissa ⚽
Actually being honest with Jeff and breaking up with him to avoid any further heartbreak?
taissa ⚽
Or leading him on when you’re not actually interested in him, only to eventually break his heart even worse later on because you were continuously lying?
van 🔥
yeah if you think about it breaking up w him is the less mean option
lottie 🦌
plus ik jeff is stupid but i don't think he’s like a total asshole
lottie 🦌
he’ll probably understand
jackie 🍓
you guys are probably right
jackie 🍓
BUT STILL
jackie 🍓
UGH WHY DOES BEING A LESBIAN HAVE TO BE SO HARD
van 🔥
ugh i ask myself the same question every day
van 🔥
the only gf ive ever had was some girl from florida
taissa ⚽
How did you date her if she was from Florida?
van 🔥
weewoo someones never heard of owning a fucking phone
lottie 🦌
wow that was uncharacteristically mean of you van
van 🔥
sorry my demons
van 🔥
anyway as i was saying i literally have to fight the admirers off with a stick
lottie 🦌
wow such an active lesbian life
taissa ⚽
All I’ve done is pine after this girl who doesn’t even like me.
taissa ⚽
It’s depressing, honestly.
van 🔥
who do i have to kill 🔪
lottie 🦌
yourself
taissa ⚽
LOTTIE THAT WAS UNCALLED FOR
van 🔥
LOTTIE WTF
jackie 🍓
i think
jackie 🍓
im going to cry
van 🔥
NUH UH I FORBID IT
taissa ⚽
Over Jeff Sadecki?
jackie 🍓
ew no
taissa ⚽
Over SHAUNA fucking SHIPMAN?
jackie 🍓
no
jackie 🍓
yes
van 🔥
it’s okay to cry but never over girls
lottie 🦌
no i think thats okay
lottie 🦌
crying over guys is a problem tho
taissa ⚽
Can you do that for us, at least, Jackie?
jackie 🍓
what don’t cry over a guy?
taissa ⚽
Yes.
jackie 🍓
yeah sure
taissa ⚽
Alright, good.
lottie 🦌
see you guys at the mall at 12!!!
van 🔥
AAAAAAA BYEEEEEE
van 🔥
and jackie pls get your whimsy back
van 🔥
it’s unsettling
jackie 🍓
SHUT THE FUCK UP ABOUT MY WHIMSY
ss.shipman to jackierabbit
Sunday, September 20, 10:01 A.M.
shauna 🌛
Hey
shauna 🌛
Are you okay?
jackie 💗🐇
yeah ofc!!!
jackie 💗🐇
its like u said im just tired from the sleepover
shauna 🌛
Actually I lied to cover up for you
shauna 🌛
You’ve been acting really off this morning
jackie 💗🐇
i have?
shauna 🌛
Yes you really have
jackie 💗🐇
how can you tell
shauna 🌛
Jackie you’re my best friend
shauna 🌛
Of course I can tell when something’s up with you
jackie 💗🐇
nothings up shauna i promise
shauna 🌛
You were acting kinda weird at the sleepover last night too
shauna 🌛
Did something happen?
shauna 🌛
Did I do something?
shauna 🌛
You know you can tell me
jackie 💗🐇
nononono really i promise!!!
jackie 💗🐇
you didnt do anything
jackie 💗🐇
it’s just that im a little stressed
jackie 💗🐇
with school and nationals and stuff
jackie 💗🐇
and jeff
shauna 🌛
Oh right
shauna 🌛
Jeff
jackie 💗🐇
yeah
jackie 💗🐇
but i promise you dont have to worry
jackie 💗🐇
you didnt do anything wrong!!!
shauna 🌛
All right
shauna 🌛
Still best friends?
jackie 💗🐇
ofc still best friends
jackie 💗🐇
yk nothings gonna change that shauna!!
shauna 🌛
Yeah I know
shauna 🌛
<3
jackie 💗🐇
🩷
nat_the_scat to travmartinez
Sunday, September 20, 12:27 P.M.
nat 🚬
SHES SINGLE
daddy issues #2
whar
nat 🚬
SHES FUCKING SINGLE
daddy issues #2
whut
nat 🚬
TRAVIS
daddy issues #2
sorry who are we talking about
daddy issues #2
OHHHHH RIGHT
daddy issues #2
mystery sex dream girl
nat 🚬
DONT CALL HER THAT
nat 🚬
WHAT THE FUCK
daddy issues #2
wait you thought she was taken
daddy issues #2
you’re having gay SMASH DREAMS about her
daddy issues #2
and you thought she was TAKEN
nat 🚬
WE AGREED THAT THE DREAMS DIDNT MEAN ANYTHING
daddy issues #2
no you agreed
daddy issues #2
i personally think you want her
nat 🚬
i literally dont
daddy issues #2
can you pleaseeeee just tell me who she is
nat 🚬
no
nat 🚬
you dont know her
nat 🚬
hows the beach
daddy issues #2
i see you tryna change the subject
daddy issues #2
but its okay
daddy issues #2
its way too fucking cold
daddy issues #2
but i got a burger
nat 🚬
i got a taco
daddy issues #2
wow were so productive
nat 🚬
ikr????
nat 🚬
now go get back to your child
daddy issues #2
you go get back to your gf
nat 🚬
im gonna nuke you
daddy issues #2
😝
ss.shipman to nat_the_scat
Sunday, September 20, 12:39 P.M.
shauna 🌛
Nat
shauna 🌛
Nat
shauna 🌛
Natalie
shauna 🌛
Natalie Scatorccio
⚹ natalie ⚹
what the fuck do you want shipman
shauna 🌛
Pull your head out of Lottie’s ass and get over here
shauna 🌛
We’re all going to eat
shauna 🌛
I need to talk to you
⚹ natalie ⚹
you can talk to me like this
shauna 🌛
Jesus fine
shauna 🌛
Look so Tai told me to talk to you about this
⚹ natalie ⚹
oh god no
⚹ natalie ⚹
is it about nationals
shauna 🌛
What no
shauna 🌛
It’s just I think I like a girl
⚹ natalie ⚹
oh
⚹ natalie ⚹
its jackie isn't it
shauna 🌛
Is it that obvious
⚹ natalie ⚹
kinda?????? idk
shauna 🌛
But look the thing is
shauna 🌛
I’ve also liked guys before
⚹ natalie ⚹
ohhhhhhhhhhhh okkkkkkkk
shauna 🌛
Tai says I’m not a lesbian if I like guys
shauna 🌛
But I’m not straight if I like girls
shauna 🌛
So how do I know which I am
⚹ natalie ⚹
shauna
⚹ natalie ⚹
you know you could be bi like me right
shauna 🌛
What
⚹ natalie ⚹
bi
⚹ natalie ⚹
bisexual
⚹ natalie ⚹
likes boys and girls
shauna 🌛
Oh
⚹ natalie ⚹
look u really wanna talk
⚹ natalie ⚹
we can go talk in the bathroom or smth
shauna 🌛
Thanks
shauna 🌛
I guess
⚹ natalie ⚹
no problem
⚹ natalie ⚹
or whatever
nat_the_scat to travmartinez
Sunday, September 20, 12:58 P.M.
rat girl 🤡
SHE JUST BOUGHT ME A FUCKING ARCTIC MONKEYS VINYL
travis 👾
JAVIS FRIEND JUST PISSED IN THE OCEAN
travis 👾
wait what
rat girl 🤡
LMAOOOOOOOO
travis 👾
she BOUGHT you something
rat girl 🤡
YEAH THE FUCKING AM RECORD
travis 👾
does she have money
rat girl 🤡
oh yeah
rat girl 🤡
her parents are like loooooaded
travis 👾
marry her????
travis 👾
literally what are you waiting for
rat girl 🤡
SJUT UPPPPPP TRAVIS
rat girl 🤡
oh my god im giggling
rat girl 🤡
like im GIGGLING
rat girl 🤡
WHY AM I GIGGLING I DONT EVEN LIKE HER
travis 👾
JAVI JUST GOT KNOCKED OVER BY A FUCKING WAVE
rat girl 🤡
LMAOOOOO WHAT
rat girl 🤡
GO GET HIM
travis 👾
IM RUNNING
nat_the_scat to fleetwoodlottie
Sunday, September 20, 2:59 P.M.
LOVE OF MY LIFE????? 💝💞💖💘
lottie?
lottie 🦌
yeah?
LOVE OF MY LIFE????? 💝💞💖💘
thank you
LOVE OF MY LIFE????? 💝💞💖💘
for the am vinyl
lottie 🦌
oh no problem!!!
lottie 🦌
it wasnt that expensive and i really wouldnt mind anyway
lottie 🦌
i just wanted you to have it since i know you like them
LOVE OF MY LIFE????? 💝💞💖💘
yeah i do
LOVE OF MY LIFE????? 💝💞💖💘
wait how did you know
lottie 🦌
oh i just remember you talking about it once
LOVE OF MY LIFE????? 💝💞💖💘
oh
LOVE OF MY LIFE????? 💝💞💖💘
well thanks either way lottie
lottie 🦌
no problem nat
africangrey to “BUZZ BUZZ BUZZ 🐝”:
Sunday, September 20, 3:39 P.M.
misty 🍄
i’d say that was a successful day!!!!
laura lee 😇
Oh yes I agree!
laura lee 😇
What did you all buy?
SHAUNA ❤
I got some new pens, some flannels, and a new journal
jackie 🍓
i got a b&bw body spray, some new makeup, and a bunch of clothes!!
jackie 🍓
i found this REALLY cute skirt in jcpenney that im obsessed with
laura lee 😇
Oh I got a skirt as well!
laura lee 😇
I also got a lovely necklace and a headband, and some lip gloss that tastes like strawberries
laura lee 😇
By the way, thank you for buying me the lip gloss, Taissa and Van!
taissa ⚽
No problem, it was pretty cheap.
van 🔥
yeah anyday LL
lottie 🦌
i got a fleetwood mac tshirt from a thrift store and a really cute necklace
lottie 🦌
OH AND a new jellycat for my collection and a clairo poster
van 🔥
CLAIRO MENTIONED??????
misty 🍄
What did u get nat? (・∀・)
nat 🚬
a mazzy star tshirt and a new eyeliner pencil
nat 🚬
And an arctic monkeys vinyl
lottie 🦌
that i bought btw ✋
van 🔥
damn lottie?????
van 🔥
didnt know you had game like that
lottie 🦌
SHUTUPSHUTUPSHUTUP OH MY GODDDD
misty 🍄
What about you, Van??
van 🔥
so in addition to my SUPER SICK YELLOW KICKS 😎
van 🔥
i got a spiderman beanie and a bunch of old movie dvds from a vintage store
taissa ⚽
I got some new books, a carabiner, and a scented candle.
taissa ⚽
All in all, I’d say this was a fun outing.
jackie 🍓
“outing”
jackie 🍓
you sound british
SHAUNA ❤
You sound like a mom
taissa ⚽
What’s mom-like in “outing?”
nat 🚬
wellllllllll………
van 🔥
NAT NO 😭
lottie 🦌
NATALIE WHAT
nat_the_scat to ss.shipman
Sunday, September 20, 3:45 P.M.
⚹ natalie ⚹
oh btw are u good
⚹ natalie ⚹
with the whole bisexual thing
shauna 🌛
Yeah I think so
⚹ natalie ⚹
alr cool
ss.shipman to jackierabbit
Sunday, September 20, 3:46 P.M.
SHAUNA ❤
Hey Jax
jackie 🍓
hey shauna!!!
SHAUNA ❤
Are you feeling better?
SHAUNA ❤
Than whatever was happening this morning I mean
jackie 🍓
oh yeah lol
jackie 🍓
im all good!
SHAUNA ❤
Wanna call for a little while?
jackie 🍓
EEEEEEEEE yes ofc???
jackierabbit is calling…
Accept?
yes no
Notes:
yes Lottie is a simp. i know this because i am the biggest lottie matthews kin on the planet and no one knows her like i do.
natshauna just came out of nowhere and idk why
JAVI!!!! I LOVE HIM YAYY and I love his convos with travis they are just sibling goals (minus when travis ate him)
shauna bisexual canon, yes I know this you can't prove me wrong
Chapter 3: the sapphic stupidity epidemic
Summary:
jackie starts spiraling into insanity. shauna does too. and then natalie. the jv girls make an appearance. tai and van attempt to use their negative rizz. melissa is stupid and gay. and lottie is TRYING, goddamnit.
Notes:
ok so I'm trying to have something remotely resembling an update schedule and idk if its working
(you can probablyyyyyy expect weekly chapters tho???)
I was gonna post this on Friday in honor of the season 3 finale coming out, but I was being harassed by someone (looking at you kara) to post and so here it is!!! I don't even know if Ill have the willpower to post after the finale though so I'm pretty sure this is safer lmaooooo
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
jackierabbit to ss.shipman
Monday, September 21, 1:07 A.M.
jackie 🍓
what if i have a party
SHAUNA ❤
Jackie literally what
SHAUNA ❤
It’s one in the morning
jackie 🍓
kind of like a halloween party
jackie 🍓
but we can have it whenever
jackie 🍓
we can use someone’s birthday as an excuse
SHAUNA ❤
You mean like
SHAUNA ❤
A costume party
jackie 🍓
YES ONE OF THOSE
jackie 🍓
and we force everyone on the team to go
SHAUNA ❤
Okay now Jackie
SHAUNA ❤
Why would we do that
jackie 🍓
shauna were down on team cooperation
jackie 🍓
nationals is coming up
SHAUNA ❤
They’re like at the end of the year but okay
jackie 🍓
we cant win if we dont work as a team
jackie 🍓
and were a total mess
jackie 🍓
tai and vans sexual tension is becoming a fatal weapon
jackie 🍓
so is lottie and nats but theyre actually constantly trying to kill each other
jackie 🍓
and the jv girls are their own unit
SHAUNA ❤
But Jackie we have months to worry about this
SHAUNA ❤
And it’s not even your problem
jackie 🍓
BUT IT IS!!!
jackie 🍓
IM the captain
jackie 🍓
its my responsibility to make sure everything goes perfect so we win
SHAUNA ❤
Not everything has to be perfect for us to win
SHAUNA ❤
And the planning will be awful if you do it while sleep deprived
jackie 🍓
wait really
SHAUNA ❤
Yes really
SHAUNA ❤
So get some sleep and you can plan this in the morning when you’re well rested
jackie 🍓
alright fine
jackierabbit to africangrey
Monday, September 21, 1:10 A.M.
jackie 🍓
hey misty!!!!
jackie 🍓
i know its pretty early, but i was wondering something
jackie 🍓
at school, i was wondering if you would try and talk to and be friends with the jv girls on the team
jackie 🍓
i’m trying to have total teamwork and it would mean a lot!
Monday, September 21, 7:25 A.M.
misty 🍄
Ooh of course jackie!!!
misty 🍄
Ill handle it at school today :)
jackie 🍓
thanks!! rlly appreciate it
africangrey to “BUZZ BUZZ BUZZ 🐝”:
Monday, September 21, 3:10 P.M.
erm actually 🤓
Good news jackie!!!
van 😎
OOOOOOOOH LEMME GUESS
van 😎
lottie and nat fuckeddddd
schizophrenia incarnate
NO WHAT
blonde piranha
VAN ISTG IM GONNA BOX YOU
erm actually 🤓
No????
erm actually 🤓
Why would you say that????
LL
Vanessa!
LL
Watch your language
van 😎
my bad chat let me guess again
van 😎
jackie and jeff broke up
CAPTAIN JACKIE 🥶⚽🔥
VAN NO?????
CAPTAIN JACKIE 🥶⚽🔥
WHY WOULD YOU EVEN
jackie’s dog
Wait why would they break up
jackie’s dog
Did something happen
CAPTAIN JACKIE 🥶⚽🔥
nononono we’re all good!!!
fine shyt <333333
Van, just let Misty finish.
erm actually 🤓
As I was saying, jackie
erm actually 🤓
I was able to get the jv girls to agree to add me to their gc like u asked!!
van 😎
YOU DID WHAT?????
fine shyt <333333
Jackie, you asked her to WHAT?
blonde piranha
NOT THE FUCKING JV GIRLS
jackie’s dog
Jackie what did you do
CAPTAIN JACKIE 🥶⚽🔥
remember what i said last night about team cooperation???
jackie’s dog
Oh my god
jackie’s dog
I TOLD YOU TO REST
CAPTAIN JACKIE 🥶⚽🔥
I DID
CAPTAIN JACKIE 🥶⚽🔥
I TRIED
jackie’s dog
TRY HARDER
LL
What do you mean by JV girls?
fine shyt <333333
She means the junior varsity soccer girls.
LL
Ohhh yes, I know them!!
schizophrenia incarnate
MISTY HOW DID YOU EVEN???
blonde piranha
did u just hold them at gunpoint
erm actually 🤓
No of course not!!
erm actually 🤓
I just mentioned to melissa that i knew shauna
erm actually 🤓
And she immediately agreed to add me!
jackie’s dog
Wait what
CAPTAIN JACKIE 🥶⚽🔥
excuse me she what
jackie’s dog
Melissa???????
van 😎
ooooooooooooohhhhhhhhh
van 😎
looks like someoneeee has a crush on shaunaaaaa
CAPTAIN JACKIE 🥶⚽🔥
no
schizophrenia incarnate
wdym no
van 😎
ayooooo???
CAPTAIN JACKIE 🥶⚽🔥
no she doesnt
CAPTAIN JACKIE 🥶⚽🔥
she doesnt have a crush on shauna
CAPTAIN JACKIE 🥶⚽🔥
its probably nothing like that
jackie’s dog
God I hope not
blonde piranha
whatever you sayyyyyyy jackie
erm actually 🤓
I hope i did well jackie!!
CAPTAIN JACKIE 🥶⚽🔥
oh yeah thank you misty!!!
fleetwoodlottie to nat_the_scat
Monday, September 21, 3:19 P.M.
spawn from hell (maybe??)
did you see that
nat 🚬
see what
spawn from hell (maybe??)
jackies reaction when misty brought up melissa
nat 🚬
oh yeah totally
nat 🚬
but i mean
nat 🚬
theyre totally into each other right????
spawn from hell (maybe??)
WAIT THEY ARE????
spawn from hell (maybe??)
i mean i knew about jackie but
nat 🚬
yeah no shauna told me
spawn from hell (maybe??)
OMFG REALLY???????
nat 🚬
YEAH LMAOOOO
taiturner to “BUZZ BUZZ BUZZ 🐝”:
Monday, September 21, 3:21 P.M.
fine shyt <333333
What are you guys even doing?
fine shyt <333333
Don’t we literally all have homework?
van 😎
yeah but see i couldnt care less
erm actually 🤓
I’m going to do my homework soon actually!
schizophrenia incarnate
i did mine already
schizophrenia incarnate
its probably dogshit but whatever
blonde piranha
ill just half ass it tomorrow
blonde piranha
i dont think it really matters
CAPTAIN JACKIE 🥶⚽🔥
shauna and i are at that one cafe by school
CAPTAIN JACKIE 🥶⚽🔥
the one with the banana bread van likes???
jackie’s dog
Yeah we got you a birthday cake from there a few years ago
van 😎
OHHHHHHHHH MY GODDDDDD I LOVE THAT PLACE
van 😎
IM A REGULAR THERE THEY KNOW MY NAME AND MY ORDER AND EVERYTHING
CAPTAIN JACKIE 🥶⚽🔥
we can bring you back a banana bread if u want!!
van 😎
OHMYGOD YES PLEASEEE
jackie’s dog
You got it
taiturner to ss.shipman
Monday, September 21, 3:23 P.M.
taissa ♔
Hey, Shauna?
shauna 🌛
Yeah
taissa ♔
What’s the name of that cafe you and Jackie are at?
taissa ♔
Random question just curious
shauna 🌛
Oh it’s called Willowgrove Bakery
shauna 🌛
Here I’ll send you the address
taissa ♔
Okay, that would be great.
shauna 🌛
(insert link)
shauna 🌛
There you go
taissa ♔
Thank you!
shauna 🌛
No problem
ss.shipman to jackierabbit
Monday, September 21, 3:25 P.M.
shauna 🌛
Look what Tai just sent me
shauna 🌛
(insert screenshot)
shauna 🌛
Literally JUST after finding out Van loves going here
jackie 💗🐇
OH MY GODDDDD YOURE SO RIGHT
jackie 💗🐇
like why do you wanna know tai???
jackie 💗🐇
to take VANNNNNNN?????
shauna 🌛
She is SO planning a date hello????
jackie 💗🐇
they want each other so bad its stupid
shauna 🌛
LMAO
melissa.hatgirl has added africangrey to “IT GIRLZZZZZZ 💅”.
Monday, September 21, 3:29 P.M.
mari ✨
melissa what the fuck did you do
gen 🌀
melissa who is this
misty 💟
hello!!
akilah ☘
hi???
melissa 🌈
guys this is misty
mari ✨
like misty quigley
gen 🌀
from school
misty 💟
Yes!!
misty 💟
It’s lovely to meet you all!!
akilah ☘
hi i guess???
melissa 🌈
guys pleaseeeee
melissa 🌈
misty these are my friends
melissa 🌈
mari
mari ✨
that’s meeeeeeeee
melissa 🌈
gen
gen 🌀
heyy
melissa 🌈
and akilah
akilah ☘
hi misty!
misty 💟
Hello all!
misty 💟
Let me add you to my contacts!
you added that_h0t_sh1t, flowergirlakilah, and thegenesis to your contacts
mari ✨
melissa
melissa 🌈
yes
mari ✨
you didnt tell us you would be adding misty
akilah ☘
mari can you try to not be a total nasty cunt for five minutes
gen 🌀
hey shes not a nasty cunt
mari ✨
yeah my cunt is amazing
mari ✨
not nasty in the slightest
akilah ☘
i really really doubt that
mari ✨
no its true really
mari ✨
i can show you if you want
gen 🌀
AYO????????
misty 💟
Well this wasnt the welcome I was expecting haha
melissa 🌈
im so sorry
melissa 🌈
we must look so stupid
misty 💟
Oh no I really dont mind!!
misty 💟
My group chat is just as insane
gen 🌀
well this is the kind of default
gen 🌀
melissa does stupid shit
gen 🌀
i condone the stupid shit
akilah ☘
i try to prevent the stupid shit
gen 🌀
and mari is always really badly flirting with akilah for some reason
mari ✨
WHAT NO IM NOT
melissa 🌈
yes you are
misty 💟
Thats all fine with me!! (•‿•)
mari ✨
uh huh
gen 🌀
melissa would you mind telling us why you added misty
mari ✨
without telling us
melissa 🌈
um
melissa 🌈
well
melissa 🌈
misty can you explain it
gen 🌀
pussy
melissa 🌈
yeah that was kinda the goal
mari ✨
WHAT 💀
akilah ☘
MELISSA WHAT DID YOU DO
misty 💟
Well I approached melissa today in school
mari ✨
oh you aPpRoAcHeD her did you
akilah ☘
mari shut the fuck up
mari ✨
yes of course 🛐
gen 🌀
MARI KEEP IT IN YOUR PANTS
gen 🌀
continue misty 💀
misty 💟
And I mentioned that jackie taylor and shauna shipman are trying to get the whole team together for nationals!
mari ✨
OH GOD NOT THE S WORD
misty 💟
S word?
akilah ☘
shauna
gen 🌀
she makes melissa act like a dog
melissa 🌈
NO SHE DOES NOT
misty 💟
Well anyway Melissa got very excited and asked if I knew shauna
mari ✨
of COURSE she did
misty 💟
And I told her yes, because I am friends with shauna
misty 💟
And when I asked if I could hang out with you guys, she agreed! :)
akilah ☘
oh my god melissa
akilah ☘
you didnt run this by us so you could FUCK SHAUNA SHIPMAN?????
melissa 🌈
maybe?????????
mari ✨
YOU SLUT
melissa 🌈
YOURE ONE TO TALK
melissa 🌈
LITTLE MISS MARI “step on me akilah” IBARRA
gen 🌀
MELISSA YOU LITERALLY SAID THAT SHAUNA COULD PUNCH YOU AND YOUD THANK HER
akilah ☘
EXACTLY THIS IS A PROBLEM
misty 💟
Wait melissa
misty 💟
Do you have a crush on shauna??
melissa 🌈
well a little
melissa 🌈
but dont tell anyone
misty 💟
Oh i promise i wont!!
gen 🌀
“a little” bffr
akilah ☘
melissas been in love with shauna since freshman year
mari ✨
shauna blocked a ball from taking her out and melissas been obsessed ever since
melissa 🌈
STOP DONT TELL HER THAT
misty 💟
You dont have to worry melissa ill keep it a secret!
africangrey to jackierabbit
Monday, September 21, 3:46 P.M.
misty 🍄
It turns out van was right!
misty 🍄
Melissa does have a crush on shauna!
jackie 🍓
WHAT
flowergirlakilah to “IT GIRLZZZZZZ 💅”:
Monday, September 21, 3:47 P.M.
akilah ☘
trust me shes not really keeping it a secret
mari ✨
MELISSA THIS IS THE STUPIDEST THING YOUVE EVER DONE
melissa 🌈
SHUT UP OMG
gen 🌀
no i agree
mari ✨
THANK YOU GEN
gen 🌀
this is probably the most desperate youve ever been
melissa 🌈
NUH UH ITS NOT MAJORITY VOTE
melissa 🌈
IM NOT TAKING IT
mari ✨
MISTY BACK ME UP HERE
misty 💟
Well I dont know…
misty 💟
I really dont want to pick sides…
mari ✨
hey akilah did anyone ever tell you you have gorgeous eyes
akilah ☘
youre trying to get me to take your side in this fight and its not gonna work
mari ✨
why would you say that :(
mari ✨
im just trying to brighten up your day
mari ✨
the way your smile brightens up my day whenever i see it
akilah ☘
uh huh
akilah ☘
how are you just coming up with these on the spot
mari ✨
your beauty is giving me the inspiration
misty 💟
Are they always like this?
gen 🌀
yes
melissa 🌈
absolutely
gen 🌀
someone write a fanfic
misty 💟
Oh I can write fanfics!
mari ✨
DO IT
akilah ☘
DO NOT
gen 🌀
can we just admit melissa wants to fuck shauna and move on
akilah ☘
we already knew that tho
melissa 🌈
can we not do this with misty in the chat
mari ✨
what do u wanna cover her ears
misty 💟
Oh i forgot!
misty 💟
Jackie said she wanted to have the whole team together for nationals
misty 💟
So if she plans any team activities ill be sure to pass it on to u guys!! :)
gen 🌀
alr sounds good
melissa 🌈
see we got a little inside spy here
misty 💟
Im not a spy!
misty 💟
What do you mean by that
melissa 🌈
NONONONO it was a joke
akilah ☘
ok she might be an inside job but can she shut mari up
mari ✨
NO ONE CAN SHUT ME UP MOTHERFUCKA
jackierabbit to africangrey
Monday, September 21, 3:58 P.M.
jackie 🍓
misty please what do you mean
jackie 🍓
MELISSA has a crush on SHAUNA?
misty 🍄
Well…
misty 🍄
Thats what the jv girls told me in the group chat!
jackie 🍓
do you like
jackie 🍓
have a screenshot?
misty 🍄
No
misty 🍄
But i could take one!
jackie 🍓
YES PLEASE
misty 🍄
(insert screenshot)
jackie 🍓
THANK YOU OML
misty 🍄
You can’t tell anyone!!
misty 🍄
I promised melissa no one would find out!
jackie 🍓
dw abt it misty
jackierabbit to ss.shipman
Monday, September 21, 4:02 P.M.
jackie 💗🐇
SHAUNA
shauna 🌛
Yes????
jackie 💗🐇
(insert screenshot)
jackie 💗🐇
MISTY GOT THIS
shauna 🌛
…What
shauna 🌛
The fuck?
shauna 🌛
Melissa?
jackie 💗🐇
I KNOW RIGHT???
shauna 🌛
I’m not trying to be mean but like
shauna 🌛
That’s actually crazy
jackie 💗🐇
no i totally agree omfg
jackie 💗🐇
but wait shauna
shauna 🌛
Uh huh?
jackie 💗🐇
do you like
jackie 💗🐇
actually like her??
shauna 🌛
What no????
shauna 🌛
Of course I don’t LIKE her Jackie
jackie 💗🐇
no i mean just checking
jackie 💗🐇
its not like it would be a problem tho
shauna 🌛
If I liked Melissa
jackie 💗🐇
NONONONO
jackie 💗🐇
just if you liked girls
jackie 💗🐇
that would be fine
shauna 🌛
Oh
shauna 🌛
Good to know
jackie 💗🐇
yeah
jackie 💗🐇
you could tell me
shauna 🌛
I’ll keep that in mind I guess
jackierabbit to “girlkissers official gc”:
Monday, September 21, 4:06 P.M.
jackie 🍓
SHES STRAIGHT
jackie 🍓
SHES STRAIGHT AAAAAA
lottie 🦌
wait who
taissa ⚽
Who do you THINK?
van 🔥
ISTG WHAT DID SHIPMAN DO
jackie 🍓
(insert screenshot)
jackie 🍓
IM GONNA LOSE MY MIND WHAT WAS I THINKING
taissa ⚽
Was that…
taissa ⚽
Was that your attempt to find out if she liked girls?
jackie 🍓
MAYBE????
lottie 🦌
jeeeeeesus christ jackie
jackie 🍓
AND VAN YOU WERE RIGHT
van 🔥
ofc i was
van 🔥
what are we talking about
jackie 🍓
MELISSA IS FUCKING IN LOVE WITH SHAUNA
lottie 🦌
NO FUCKING WAY
taissa ⚽
Wait for real??
jackie 🍓
YES SHE FUCKING SAID IT
jackie 🍓
MISTY FOUND OUT BC SHES IN THEIR GROUP CHAT
van 🔥
I TOLD YOU MY GAYDAR WAS NEVER WRONG
jackie 🍓
WELL IT WAS WRONG ABOUT SHAUNA
lottie 🦌
wait why do you think that
jackie 🍓
she didnt fucking say she liked girls
taissa ⚽
Jackie, either way, coming out takes time.
taissa ⚽
Shauna could still like girls, even if she didn’t come out and say it.
jackie 🍓
lord youre like a mom
jackie 🍓
thank god love u taissa <3
taissa ⚽
Ok.
lottie 🦌
ur not gonna say it back :(
taissa ⚽
The feeling just isn’t mutual.
van 🔥
lemme try
van 🔥
i love you tai!!!
jackie 🍓
oh my god she went silent
lottie 🦌
TAI HELLO
jackie 🍓
shes broken
jackie 🍓
van you literally broke her
van 🔥
i literally did not
jackie 🍓
you like literally did
taissa ⚽
I’m back.
taissa ⚽
My mom called me for something.
lottie 🦌
mmhmm thats convenient
taissa ⚽
What?
lottie 🦌
nothing
jackie 🍓
i thought this was for advice
van 🔥
this is for gay chaos
van 🔥
it has no other purpose
ss.shipman to nat_the_scat
Monday, September 21, 4:19 P.M.
shauna 🌛
I
shauna 🌛
AM
shauna 🌛
FUCKING
shauna 🌛
IDIOTIC
⚹ natalie ⚹
well its about time you realized
shauna 🌛
Oh fuck off Natalie
⚹ natalie ⚹
what did you do
shauna 🌛
Jackie was talking about how “it would be okay if I liked girls”
shauna 🌛
AND I FUCKING SAID NOTHING
⚹ natalie ⚹
you said NOTHING???
shauna 🌛
Well I kinda said “ok cool”
⚹ natalie ⚹
“OK COOL??”
⚹ natalie ⚹
SHAUNA
⚹ natalie ⚹
SHES PROBABLY CRYING IN HER ROOM BC YOU DONT LIKE GIRLS
shauna 🌛
WHY would she be crying
shauna 🌛
She doesn’t even like girls
⚹ natalie ⚹
i really really doubt that
shauna 🌛
Uh huh why
⚹ natalie ⚹
lotties been feeding me some really good gossip
shauna 🌛
Oh you and Lottie are talking?
⚹ natalie ⚹
shut up this is about you
shauna 🌛
I’m gonna force you to tell me about that later
⚹ natalie ⚹
nuh uh
shauna 🌛
Uh huh
⚹ natalie ⚹
but seriously i thought you were the smart one
⚹ natalie ⚹
“ok cool” my ass
shauna 🌛
WHAT WAS I SUPPOSED TO SAY??
⚹ natalie ⚹
“well actually jax i do kinda like girls im super bisexual”
shauna 🌛
ABSOLUTELY NOT
⚹ natalie ⚹
SHAUNA THAT WAS YOUR MOMENT
shauna 🌛
WHO THE FUCK COMES OUT OVER TEXT
⚹ natalie ⚹
pussies
shauna 🌛
Glad we can agree on that
⚹ natalie ⚹
that and the “guys and girls are hot” thing
shauna 🌛
Yeah I guess
shauna 🌛
No but actually I’m gonna break something why was I so stupid
⚹ natalie ⚹
are you seriously about to crash out over this right now
shauna 🌛
Maybe I fucking will
⚹ natalie ⚹
go to sleep you bi loser
shauna 🌛
Hey you’re a bi loser too
shauna 🌛
And why would I sleep it’s like 4 PM
⚹ natalie ⚹
or rob a bank or read or something
⚹ natalie ⚹
stop thinking about this
shauna 🌛
You don’t have to tell me twice
jackierabbit to ss.shipman
Monday, September 21, 4:26 P.M.
jackie 🍓
so do i have the green light to have the party
SHAUNA ❤
The costume party?
jackie 🍓
yeah the team one
SHAUNA ❤
Jackie you don’t need my permission to throw a party
SHAUNA ❤
Do whatever works for you
jackie 🍓
alright i just wanted to make sure you were ok with it
SHAUNA ❤
I am
SHAUNA ❤
By the way Jackie?
jackie 🍓
OOOOOOOH wanna help me with invitations tomorrow
jackie 🍓
wait what were you gonna say
SHAUNA ❤
You know what never mind
SHAUNA ❤
Yeah sure I’ll help
jackie 🍓
EEEEEEEEEE great!!
nat_the_scat to travmartinez
Monday, September 21, 5:17 P.M.
rat girl 🤡
TRAVIS TRAVIS TRAVIS
travis 👾
WHAT WHAT WHAT
rat girl 🤡
I JUST HAD LIKE SEVEN REALIZATIONS AT THE SAME TIME
travis 👾
oh my god
travis 👾
are you ok
rat girl 🤡
i need help
travis 👾
im on my way over
Notes:
ok so the jv girls wont be TOOOOO major but I wanted them to have this little chapter bc theyre hilarious and they are getting a lot more screentime recently, so what's the harm????
yes this has marikilah because I saw one edit and now I'm obsessed, what about it???? you read the tags, don't be surprised
and YESSSS, you will find out what happened to nat next chapter (I think)
Chapter 4: gay avengers assemble (to wreak havoc)
Summary:
ACTUAL CRAZINESS: jeff gets bullied, shauna is a petty jealous ho, Lottie and tai actually try to do something abt their crushes??? who knew lesbians could do that??? lots of halloween costumes, dates are planned, melissa is plotting, and nat is having another breakdown (travis is there for moral support)
Notes:
since this is literally out a few days after season 3 is done...dedicated to lottie matthews, van palmer, mari ibarra, and all the other baddies that got offed this season, rip legends
i have a very bare-bones formulation of a plot in my head and i'm just gonna see where it goes
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
jackierabbit to “BUZZ BUZZ BUZZ 🐝”:
Wednesday, September 22, 2:48 P.M.
jackie 🍓
guys just wanted to let you know!!
jackie 🍓
my parents are gonna be out next month on the 10th
jackie 🍓
so ill be having a costume party at my house!!!
lottie 🦌
OH SHIT FR????
lottie 🦌
YOU CAN BET IM COMING
van 🔥
OOOOOH COUNT ME IN BBG
nat 🚬
yk what why the fuck not
taissa ⚽
I’ll go if everybody else does.
SHAUNA ❤
You mean if Van does
taissa ⚽
I said what I meant.
nat 🚬
no not really
lottie 🦌
youre not too good at doing that
jackie 🍓
wow lottie way to read her to SHIT 😭
lottie 🦌
i dont like to lie
misty 🍄
EEEEE of course!
misty 🍄
Let me ask my mom!
laura lee 😇
My parents said yes as long as someone takes me there and back!
SHAUNA ❤
I can drive you Laura Lee
laura lee 😇
Oh thank you very much Shauna!
taissa ⚽
It goes without saying that Shauna’s going, then?
jackie 🍓
ofc she is
jackie 🍓
she helped me with all the planning
nat 🚬
wait can travis come too
lottie 🦌
travis martinez
nat 🚬
yeah????
lottie 🦌
didnt u used to date
lottie 🦌
why would you want to go to a party w ur ex boyfriend
nat 🚬
we alr broke up
nat 🚬
hes like my best friend now
lottie 🦌
but
van 🔥
look as long as he doesnt tell on us to his dad go crazy
jackie 🍓
you know what sure!!
jackie 🍓
the more the merrier!!
nat 🚬
alr thanks
nat_the_scat to travmartinez
Wednesday, September 22, 2:50 P.M.
nat 🚬
do u wanna go to a costume party
daddy issues #2
…huh
nat 🚬
at jackie taylors house
nat 🚬
on the 10th
daddy issues #2
like youre inviting me
nat 🚬
yes im inviting you fuckhead
nat 🚬
can you come yes or no
daddy issues #2
i should be able to yeah
daddy issues #2
do i need a costume
nat 🚬
oh no shit sherlock
nat 🚬
its kinda a costume party
daddy issues #2
what the fuck should i dress up as
daddy issues #2
OOOOOOH i can be that goth kid from coraline
nat 🚬
the one with the fuckass posture
daddy issues #2
yeah him
daddy issues #2
ive got some goggles and gloves
nat 🚬
i can give you a sweater
daddy issues #2
you should be the vampire girl from hotel transylvania
daddy issues #2
you basically dress the same anyway
nat 🚬
i actually think i have that dress
daddy issues #2
exactly
daddy issues #2
btw are you okay
nat 🚬
what
nat 🚬
why would i not be okay
daddy issues #2
bc you were freaking the fuck out yesterday
daddy issues #2
didnt you have like “seven realizations”
nat 🚬
i had another makeout dream
daddy issues #2
ANOTHER
daddy issues #2
what were the realizations
nat 🚬
okay so realization one was that having ANOTHER dream probably wasn’t normal
nat 🚬
realization two was that these dreams were never normal in the first place
daddy issues #2
both very true
nat 🚬
realization three was that the dream i had just had was very different from the ones i usually had
daddy issues #2
wait so wdym different
nat 🚬
it wasnt just arguing like we usually do with just a makeout
nat 🚬
she told me she had a crush on me and i fucking said i liked her back???
daddy issues #2
maybe its your concence tryna tell u smth
nat 🚬
my what
daddy issues #2
your like good bad thing
nat 🚬
conscience
daddy issues #2
yeah that
daddy issues #2
what were the others
nat 🚬
realization four was that i actually didnt hate the dream
nat 🚬
realization five was that the fact that i didnt hate it probably meant something
nat 🚬
realization six was that i thought i hated her but now i think i dont and that might be a problem
nat 🚬
and realization seven was that i really desperately needed to get wasted with you
daddy issues #2
which is why you texted me in the middle of a panic attack
nat 🚬
yes exactly
daddy issues #2
and when are you going to tell me who she is
nat 🚬
yk what i think youll find out at the party
daddy issues #2
wow so youre just gonna let the suspense rip me apart
nat 🚬
youve cracked it!
daddy issues #2
youre giving me this slander after we dated for a year 🙄
nat 🚬
i give everyone this slander
nat 🚬
you should be used to it by now
africangrey to “IT GIRLZZZZZZ 💅”:
Wednesday, September 22, 3:00 P.M.
misty 💟
You guys!!
misty 💟
Jackie is having a costume party on the 10th and she said everyone on the team is invited, as well as u all!!
melissa 🌈
is shauna going
gen 🌀
melissa 💀
misty 💟
Yep she goes to all Jackies parties!
melissa 🌈
then ill be there
gen 🌀
MELISSA 💀
misty 💟
Awesome!
mari ✨
hey akilah
akilah 🍀
don’t try to convince me im already going
misty 💟
What will you all be going as? (✷‿✷)
gen 🌀
melissa should be finn from adventure time
melissa 🌈
WAIT I ACTUALLY THINK I HAVE THE BUNNY HAT
misty 💟
Oh i love that show!
mari ✨
OOOOOOOH OOOOOOH I SHOULD BE JENNIFER CHECK
misty 💟
Who?
gen 🌀
FROM JENNIFERS BODY
mari ✨
IVE GOT THE HEART EARRINGS AND I CAN GET THE PINK HOODIE
mari ✨
IM GONNA LOOK SOSOSOSOSOSOSO FINE
misty 💟
Oooh i havent seen that movie!
gen 🌀
I SHOULD BE PATRICK BATEMAN IN THE BIG PLASTIC JACKET
mari ✨
WE SHOULD COVER OURSELVES IN BLOOD
gen 🌀
YESYESYESYES
misty 💟
So i take it youre coming gen??
gen 🌀
yuh
akilah 🍀
ive had a tiana costume rotting in my closet
akilah 🍀
might as well wear it
mari ✨
okay im a frog now
melissa 🌈
i thought u were jennifer check
mari ✨
no im the frog
akilah 🍀
im not kissing you
mari ✨
awwww :(
misty 💟
U would look soooooo pretty as tiana akilah!!
melissa 🌈
oh no fr i think u would eat in that dress
gen 🌀
yeah u look awesome in green
akilah 🍀
tbanks
melissa 🌈
she makes typos when people compliment her btw
akilah 🍀
NO STFU
mari ✨
oh are we complimenting akilah
mari ✨
bc im perfect at that
akilah 🍀
WHAT ARE YOU GONNA BE MISTY
misty 💟
Oh idk yet!
misty 💟
Maybe something from a play or musical!! :)
gen 🌀
oh u like musicals??
misty 💟
Yeah totally!!
misty 💟
Im kinda considering joining theater!
mari ✨
oh word?????
misty 💟
Mhm! ^_^
mari ✨
theres a girl in theater in my precalc class
mari ✨
i think shes in crew???
misty 💟
Oooh really???
mari ✨
yeah i think her names kristen
mari ✨
or kristy
mari ✨
or christa
akilah 🍀
here goes maris asscheek memory again
melissa 🌈
WHEEZING
melissa 🌈
its almost as bad as her grades 😭
mari ✨
fuck you my grades are fine
mari ✨
CRYSTAL
mari ✨
HER NAMES FUCKING CRYSTAL
gen 🌀
melissa is dying laughing on my carpet rn
melissa 🌈
SJUT UPPPPPP
mari ✨
misty u want me to give u her insta??
misty 💟
Yes please!
mari ✨
ok im pretty sure its @crystalz_curtain_call
misty 💟
Thank you so much!!
misty 💟
And i can tell jackie that u all are coming??
akilah 🍀
yeah ig
gen 🌀
yuppppp
mari ✨
OH HELL YEAH
melissa 🌈
yeah
melissa 🌈
and say hi to shauna for me
africangrey to “BUZZ BUZZ BUZZ 🐝”:
Wednesday, September 22, 3:23 P.M.
misty 🍄
The jv girls are all going to the party!!
jackie 🍓
oh yay thank you!!
nat 🚬
wait who are yall gonna dress up as
lottie 🦌
stevie nicks
van 🔥
AYYYYYYY
van 🔥
IM GONNA BE DAVID BOWIE
taissa ⚽
What?
van 🔥
yeah im gonna have a suit and paint a lighting bolt on my face
jackie 🍓
i bet tais sweating just picturing that lmaoo
taissa ⚽
No I’m not???
SHAUNA ❤
Oh she totally is
laura lee 😇
I think i’m going to be Alice from Alice in wonderland!!
jackie 🍓
oooh that totally fits!
jackie 🍓
im sure ur gonna look great!
nat 🚬
travis said i should be the vampire girl from hotel transylvania so imma run w it
lottie 🦌
oh
van 🔥
hey lottie how u feeling rn???
lottie 🦌
OH STFU VANESSA
jackie 🍓
what r u gonna dress up as tai??
taissa ⚽
Well, my brother has a red jacket, so I was thinking I could dress up as Tyler Durden from Fight Club maybe?
taissa ⚽
Like with the flower shirt and the bloody nose and the sunglasses, that kind of thing.
jackie 🍓
OH MY GOD YOURE GONNA LOOK SO BADASS???
SHAUNA ❤
So you’re basically just gonna raid your brother’s closet
taissa ⚽
Yeah, pretty much.
jackie 🍓
mood tbh
SHAUNA ❤
Yeah I kinda respect it
lottie 🦌
van how are YOU feeling rn
van 🔥
oh im soooooo good
nat 🚬
please take your desperate homosexuality away and get a room i beg
van 🔥
MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA NO 😈
lottie 🦌
i think van might be incapable of that tbh???
misty 🍄
Im not sure what im gonna dress up as!!
misty 🍄
Any suggestions?
jackie 🍓
uhhhhhhhh bubbles from powerpuff girls??
van 🔥
envy from scott pilgrim shes such a baddie
lottie 🦌
maybe a disney princess like aurora or cinderella would work
SHAUNA ❤
Eurydice from Hadestown?
misty 🍄
Ooooh those are all good suggestions!!
misty 🍄
Ill definitely have something together before the party!!
jackierabbit to ss.shipman
Wednesday, September 22, 3:28 P.M.
jackie 🍓
sooooooo
SHAUNA ❤
Yeah
jackie 🍓
what are u gonna dress up as for the party
SHAUNA ❤
I was kinda thinking Juliet from the 1996 Romeo and Juliet
jackie 🍓
like the white dress w the wings?
SHAUNA ❤
Yeah it’s simple enough
jackie 🍓
you’re gonna look so fucking incredible shauna OMGGGGG
jackie 🍓
im gonna be karen from mean girls in her mouse costume
SHAUNA ❤
Oh so you're gonna look more incredible than me
jackie 🍓
NUH UH
jackie 🍓
its literally impossible to look better than you shauna
SHAUNA ❤
That’s incredibly incorrect but thank you regardless
SHAUNA ❤
Oh by the way Jackie
jackie 🍓
mhm?
SHAUNA ❤
Is everything okay with Jeff?
SHAUNA ❤
He’s seemed really mad at you lately
jackie 🍓
oh yeah hes just being dramatic
jackie 🍓
dont worry i got it!!
SHAUNA ❤
No I mean I don’t really care
SHAUNA ❤
I just wanted to check if you got into a fight or something
jackie 🍓
nonono no fight!!
jackie 🍓
hes just been bitchy about how im “not paying any attention to him” or whatever
SHAUNA ❤
But you kind of haven’t?
SHAUNA ❤
I mean he's seemed really really mad at you lately
jackie 🍓
he has
SHAUNA ❤
Well I mean not ALL the time
SHAUNA ❤
But I was just a little unsure
jackie 🍓
ok so maybe i should talk to him and try to see if theres a problem?
SHAUNA ❤
That would probably be best
jackie 🍓
ok i can do that but also
jackie 🍓
do u maybe wanna hang out again sometime this weekend????
SHAUNA ❤
Oh yeah totally
SHAUNA ❤
Let me ask my mom
jackierabbit to mrjeffsadecki
Wednesday, September 22, 3:30 P.M.
jackie 🍓
jeff
jackie 🍓
i need to talk to you
jeff 💩
yeah wsp
jackie 🍓
whats going on
jackie 🍓
did i do something wrong
jeff 💩
no???????? what?????????
jackie 🍓
shauna was just saying how youre acting weird recently
jackie 🍓
so i wanted to check what was wrong
jeff 💩
well i mean just because shauna says it doesnt mean its true
jackie 🍓
look if somethings wrong then just tell me
jeff 💩
jackie im hanging out with randy right now
jeff 💩
if theres a problem we can talk tomorrow
jackie 🍓
jesus fine
jackierabbit to ss.shipman
Wednesday, September 22, 3:32 P.M.
jackie 💗🐇
so i tried talking to him
shauna 🌛
How’d it go
jackie 💗🐇
that dumb fuck says there isnt a problem
jackie 💗🐇
even though you literally SAID he was acting weird
shauna 🌛
Oh
shauna 🌛
Well is everything okay
jackie 💗🐇
i guess???
jackie 💗🐇
he said we could tAlK aBoUt It ToMoRrOw or whatever
shauna 🌛
I mean that’s good???
jackie 💗🐇
i guess???
jackie 💗🐇
i kinda just dont care atp
ss.shipman to taiturner
Wednesday, September 22, 3:34
shauna 🌛
TAI
shauna 🌛
IM A BAD PERSON
taissa ♔
What?
shauna 🌛
I FUCKING JUST LIED TO JACKIE?????
taissa ♔
Alright?
taissa ♔
So why did you lie to her?
shauna 🌛
I told her Jeff was mad at her
shauna 🌛
Because I thought maybe then
shauna 🌛
They’d break up or something??
shauna 🌛
I don’t know
taissa ♔
Because you were jealous?
shauna 🌛
No
shauna 🌛
I just thought that if Jeff was gone I would maybe have a chance
taissa ♔
Yeah, so you were jealous.
shauna 🌛
Yeah okay fine
shauna 🌛
Doesn’t that mean I’m a bad friend??
taissa ♔
No, not particularly.
taissa ♔
You’re her friend, Shauna, but you’re also in love with her and you’re jealous.
taissa ♔
And it’s well-known that people do stupid things when they’re in love and jealous, right?
shauna 🌛
Yeah I guess
taissa ♔
Right, having feelings doesn’t make you a bad person.
taissa ♔
By the way, did you talk to Natalie?
shauna 🌛
Yeah she was shockingly pretty helpful
taissa ♔
That’s great!
taissa ♔
How did it go?
shauna 🌛
Well I’m bisexual now
shauna 🌛
Or no I mean I always kinda was
shauna 🌛
But Nat was able to help me realize it
taissa ♔
That’s great Shauna, thanks for telling me.
taissa ♔
Does anyone else know?
shauna 🌛
I mean I’ve only told you and Natalie
shauna 🌛
But I’m sure Van’s already picked up on it
taissa ♔
Yeah, she probably has.
taissa ♔
Van’s pretty good at that kind of thing.
shauna 🌛
Yeah she sure is
shauna 🌛
So when are you guys going to hook up
taissa ♔
GOOD NIGHT
shauna 🌛
You fucking coward
taiturner to vantheman
Wednesday, September 22, 3:41 P.M.
fine shyt <333333
Hey, Van?
van 😎
yesssssss
fine shyt <333333
I have something I want to show you tomorrow.
fine shyt <333333
Can you maybe come with me after school?
van 😎
like a date?
fine shyt <333333
Do you want to go, yes or no?
van 😎
YESSSSSS OFC I WANNA GO
fine shyt <333333
Okay, great!
fine shyt <333333
I’ll see you tomorrow at school, okay?
van 😎
damn fucking right you will
van 😎
EEEEEEEEE IM ACTUALLY SO EXCITED???
vantheman to nat_the_scat
Wednesday, September 22, 3:45
redhead disease 🧡
HELP ME AHSUHDUFHKJ
nat 🚬
WHAT THE FUCK???
taiturner to fleetwoodlottie
Wednesday, September 22, 3:45
future dirt eater
LOTTIE, HELP ME PLEASE
lottie 🦌
WHAT WHAT HAPPENED????
future dirt eater
WHERE IS SHAUNA
lottie 🦌
ONE SEC LEMME GET HER
fleetwoodlottie to ss.shipman
Wednesday, September 22, 3:46
lottie 🦌
ok so tais freaking out
lottie 🦌
i think you should call her
bisexual stalin
What
bisexual stalin
What did Tai do
lottie 🦌
idk but shes freaking the fuck out
lottie 🦌
she asked for you
bisexual stalin
I’m on it
nat_the_scat to fleetwoodlottie
Wednesday, September 22, 3:48 P.M.
LOVE OF MY LIFE????? 💝💞💖💘
i think van did something
lottie 🦌
i think tai did something too
LOVE OF MY LIFE????? 💝💞💖💘
wait what
lottie 🦌
she panic texted me and asked about shauna
lottie 🦌
i have no idea what happened she cannot stop being cryptic asf
LOVE OF MY LIFE????? 💝💞💖💘
maybe this is just them being stupid again?
LOVE OF MY LIFE????? 💝💞💖💘
i mean its common enough
lottie 🦌
yeah well im getting fucking sick of it
LOVE OF MY LIFE????? 💝💞💖💘
WE ALL ARE 💀
lottie 🦌
NO LITERALLY
lottie 🦌
i was in the library with tai yesterday
lottie 🦌
and she was kinda high and started rambling about how shes in love with van and she needs to tell her but she cant bc vans not into her like that
lottie 🦌
AND ISTG I WAS GONNA BANG MY HEAD ON THE TABLE
LOVE OF MY LIFE????? 💝💞💖💘
IS THIS A UNIVERSAL THING OR SMTH
LOVE OF MY LIFE????? 💝💞💖💘
LITERALLY EVERYONE WHOS HEARD THEM TALK ABT EACH OTHER DOES THE SAME THING
lottie 🦌
they are bringing a new meaning to loser lesbians
LOVE OF MY LIFE????? 💝💞💖💘
at least tai was able to accept it
LOVE OF MY LIFE????? 💝💞💖💘
it took the longest time for me to convince van that having gay dreams about your friends wasnt platonic
lottie 🦌
LMAO I REMEMBER THAT
lottie 🦌
when i told her it was gay asf she started losing her mind
LOVE OF MY LIFE????? 💝💞💖💘
its like jackie and shauna
LOVE OF MY LIFE????? 💝💞💖💘
we have to deal with 4 of them
lottie 🦌
yeah pretty much everyone in that gc is insane
LOVE OF MY LIFE????? 💝💞💖💘
it makes me want to nuke them all
lottie 🦌
dont u always wanna nuke them all tho
LOVE OF MY LIFE????? 💝💞💖💘
yeah pretty much
lottie 🦌
hey nat??
LOVE OF MY LIFE????? 💝💞💖💘
uh yeah
lottie 🦌
my dad is taking me downtown after school on friday to stay the weekend
lottie 🦌
and ill be allowed to just go wherever i want
LOVE OF MY LIFE????? 💝💞💖💘
oh wow thats cool
lottie 🦌
well he said i can take someone else with me
lottie 🦌
and i was wondering if you wanted to come too
LOVE OF MY LIFE????? 💝💞💖💘
wait really
LOVE OF MY LIFE????? 💝💞💖💘
new york??
lottie 🦌
yeah just walking around manhattan its only a couple subway stops away
LOVE OF MY LIFE????? 💝💞💖💘
i mean jesus lottie
LOVE OF MY LIFE????? 💝💞💖💘
wouldnt you rather take laura lee or jackie or something
lottie 🦌
no i really wouldnt
LOVE OF MY LIFE????? 💝💞💖💘
i mean yeah
LOVE OF MY LIFE????? 💝💞💖💘
i can come
lottie 🦌
okay thats great!!
lottie 🦌
ill see you at school??
LOVE OF MY LIFE????? 💝💞💖💘
yeah i guess
LOVE OF MY LIFE????? 💝💞💖💘
i still think youre annoying just for the record
lottie 🦌
okay :)
nat_the_scat to travmartinez
Wednesday, September 22, 3:54 P.M.
nat 🚬
TRAVIS SHE FUCKING ASKED ME OUT
daddy issues #2
WAIT WHAT
nat 🚬
(insert screenshot)
nat 🚬
(insert screenshot)
daddy issues #2
okay yeah that was totally a date
nat 🚬
what is she doing
nat 🚬
shes trying to make me lose my mind
daddy issues #2
oh so you REALLYYYYY like her
nat 🚬
no i do NOT
nat 🚬
shes annoying and stupid and whiny and a total brat and her existence angers me
daddy issues #2
…and you also like her
nat 🚬
NO I DONT
daddy issues #2
THEN WHY DID YOU AGREE TO GO ON A DATE WITH HER
nat 🚬
I DONT KNOW
nat 🚬
ITS A FUCKING WEEKEND IN MANHATTAN
daddy issues #2
with a really hot girl im assuming
daddy issues #2
who i dont know bc you wont tell me who she is
nat 🚬
OH MY GOD WHAT SHOULD I WEAR
nat 🚬
TRAVIS PLS I NEED YOUR EXPERTISE
daddy issues #2
name your price
nat 🚬
help.
daddy issues #2
alright im omw to your house rn
nat 🚬
WHOA WHOA WHOA I DIDNT SAY YOU COULD DO THAT
daddy issues #2
too late im on my way
daddy issues #2
you cant stop me 😈
jackierabbit to ss.shipman
Wednesday, September 22, 3:53 P.M.
jackie 🍓
heyyy do u wanna call??
SHAUNA ❤
Ooh yeah totally!
SHAUNA ❤
By the way I’m sorry if I made things weird with you and Jeff
SHAUNA ❤
Especially if there was never a problem in the first place
jackie 🍓
oh nononono
jackie 🍓
it’s totally all fine shauna!!
SHAUNA ❤
Are you sure?
SHAUNA ❤
There’s nothing wrong or anything?
jackie 🍓
nope!!
jackie 🍓
And even if there was it wouldnt really matter
SHAUNA ❤
Why wouldn’t it matter
SHAUNA ❤
I mean he IS your boyfriend
jackie 🍓
well yeah but its obviously not gonna last forever
jackie 🍓
and plus
jackie 🍓
i dont need boys when ive got you shauna
SHAUNA ❤
Wow Jackie I just
SHAUNA ❤
That’s actually so sweet
SHAUNA ❤
I really appreciate that but I still want to make sure you’re happy
jackie 🍓
oh ofc im happy!!
SHAUNA ❤
Wait one second???
SHAUNA ❤
I’m getting some random spam text
melissa.hatgirl to ss.shipman
Wednesday, September 22, 3:57 P.M.
(917)-453-6969
hi shauna
shauna 🌛
Uh who is this?
(917)-453-6969
melissa
(917)-453-6969
from school
shauna 🌛
Oh hi
shauna 🌛
What’s up
(917)-453-6969
i was wondering
(917)-453-6969
do you have a date to jackies party?
Notes:
LOTTIENAT AND TAIVAN GOING ON DATES SOON??? IS THIS PROGRESS???
i got the idea of a lottienat nyc weekend from my friend, thank you kara
can we have a moment of appreciation for travis and all the shit he's putting up w
and melissa at the end...girl shes taken i'm so sorry--
Chapter 5: taissa turner, queen of miscommunication
Summary:
lots of panicking ensues in every single team member. melissa is butthurt, jackie is going through the five stages of grief, and shauna has unknowingly become the point on a love triangle. nat is having a bajillion crises and lottie is on cloud nine while multitasking as a therapist. van and tais little surprise date crashes and burns in hell.
Notes:
i firmly believe that tai is the kind of person who doesn't know how to express her feelings so she just defaults to being mean and ruins everything as a result. that's basically what happens in this chapter
writers block kicked my ass, but I WAS ABLE TO PUSH THROUGH AND GET THIS OUT!!
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
that_h0t_sh1t to “IT GIRLZZZZZZ 💅”:
Thursday, September 23, 2:31 P.M.
mari ✨
YALL GUESS WHAT I JUST DID
gen 🌀
you lost your virginity
akilah 🍀
you burnt your house down
misty 💟
You made out with akilah???
akilah 🍀
no
melissa 🌈
GUESS LATER HOES
melissa 🌈
I DID SOMETHING STUPIDER
misty 💟
Ooooooh what happened??
gen 🌀
please dont tell me ur talking about what i think ur talking about
akilah 🍀
why are you all doing stupid shit ffs
melissa 🌈
I ASKED SHAUNA OUT
gen 🌀
FUCKING PARDON ME???
misty 💟
OMG REALLY???
akilah 🍀
YOU DID WHAT
mari ✨
JESUS FUCK THAT IS STUPIDER
gen 🌀
WHY WOULD YOU EVEN
misty 💟
WHAT DID YOU ASK???
melissa 🌈
I ASKED IF SHE HAD A DATE TO JACKIES PARTY
melissa 🌈
AND IF SHE WANTED TO GO W ME
gen 🌀
i just cringed so hard i fucking fell off of my bed
akilah 🍀
i just cringed so hard i almost walked into traffic
mari ✨
i just cringed so hard i spit out my dr pepper
misty 💟
And she said no???
melissa 🌈
YEAH NO FUCKING SHIT SHE SAID NO
misty 💟
Ohhhhh im so sorry melissa!!!
africangrey to jackierabbit
Thursday, September 23, 2:33 P.M.
misty 🍄
JACKIE!!!!
jackie 🍓
WHAT???
misty 🍄
Did shauna tell you about melissa asking her to your party??
jackie 🍓
MELISSA ASKED HER WHAT
misty 🍄
(insert screenshot)
misty 🍄
(insert screenshot)
jackie 🍓
oh my god????
jackie 🍓
shauna didnt tell me about that
misty 🍄
Really?
misty 🍄
That’s surprising!
jackie 🍓
yeah
jackie 🍓
youre damn fucking right it is
misty 🍄
Do you know why she didn’t tell you?
misty 🍄
Did something happen?
jackie 🍓
not that i know of????
jackie 🍓
why wouldnt she tell me if she had a date to MY party
misty 🍄
Well maybe she just
misty 🍄
Didnt want you to know?
jackierabbit to “girlkissers official gc”:
Thursday, September 23, 2:35 P.M.
jackie 🍓
ok so i think im having a crisis
taissa ⚽
Oh, Jesus Christ.
lottie 🦌
again
van 🔥
and im assuming this is shauna again because who else would it be
jackie 🍓
SHES GOING TO MY FUCKING HALLOWEEN PARTY WITH MELISSA
lottie 🦌
shes WHAT????
van 🔥
THE HAT LESBIAN?????
taissa ⚽
Jackie, are you sure??
jackie 🍓
YES MELISSA ASKED HER
jackie 🍓
SHE SAID IT HERSELF MISTY HAS THE FUCKING SCREENSHOTS
lottie 🦌
OH MY GOD OH MY GOD OH MY GOD????
taissa ⚽
Well, Jackie, this doesn’t necessarily mean Shauna LIKES Melissa.
jackie 🍓
WELL WHAT THE FUCK DOES IT MEAN????
van 🔥
that shauna likes girls????
taissa ⚽
I mean, there is that.
jackie 🍓
wait i didnt even think about that
lottie 🦌
wait you didnt know that already
lottie 🦌
i thought we all knew that
jackie 🍓
what.
taissa ⚽
Not the time, Lottie.
lottie 🦌
oh btw where did you and van even go
lottie 🦌
you disappeared like as soon as school was over
taissa ⚽
Nowhere, it’s not important.
fleetwoodlottie to vantheman
Thursday, September 23, 2:39 P.M.
schizophrenia incarnate
vannnnnnnn
van 😎
ASHSJHFHUEHEEJSJHE
van 😎
REMEMBER WHEN JACKIE AND SHAUNA SAID THEY WERE AT THAT ONE CAFE THAT I REALLY LIKE????
schizophrenia incarnate
the banana bread one
van 😎
mhm that one
van 😎
so tai tells me to follow her after school today because she has a surprise for me and she fucking TAKES ME HERE
van 😎
she BOUGHT MY FUCKING FOOD LOTTIE
van 😎
im gonna marry her ong
schizophrenia incarnate
wait she said it was a date????
schizophrenia incarnate
that doesnt sound very tai like
van 😎
well we havent agreed its a date yet but im just kinda hoping it is
schizophrenia incarnate
i mean did you do anything datey
van 😎
fym datey 💀
schizophrenia incarnate
like romantic
van 😎
uhhhhhhhh well she bought me banana bread and a milkshake
van 😎
we also held hands for 0.000001 seconds when we were bringing her food to our table
schizophrenia incarnate
got my hopes up for nothing
van 😎
IM SORRY IM SORRY 😭
van 😎
she also leaned her head on my shoulder when she was laughing
van 😎
is that something
schizophrenia incarnate
well since were talking about taissa “allergic to physical touch” turner
schizophrenia incarnate
then id say yeah
van 😎
HUZZAH
van 😎
but like seriously
schizophrenia incarnate
never thought id see you be serious
van 😎
what can i say im full of surprises
van 😎
no but like please be fr im begging
schizophrenia incarnate
ok????
van 😎
do you think tai actually likes me back??
schizophrenia incarnate
what the fuck
schizophrenia incarnate
wheres this coming from
van 😎
ok so look
van 😎
ive been seriously considering telling her how much i like her because SOMETIMESSS i feel like she might like me back
van 😎
but again i can never be sure and i dont even know what to say or how to say it even if i did try but its starting to make me go insane
schizophrenia incarnate
insane like youre getting pissed off orrrr
van 😎
insane like shes one of my friends so i see her every day and shes so perfect and pretty and shes always THERE but i have to act normal and im just losing it
van 😎
so its like part of me is like TAI CANT EVER FIND OUT THIS WILL RUIN EVERYTHING
van 😎
but the other part is saying TELL HER DONT BE A PUSSY VAN NO BACKING OUT THIS TIME
schizophrenia incarnate
ok but van you tried confessing several times and said that “no backing out” bullshit
schizophrenia incarnate
and it still hasnt worked
van 😎
BECAUSE SHES OBLIVIOUS
van 😎
LIKE SHES THE SMARTEST PERSON EVER BUT WHEN IM IN HER FACE CONFESSING SHE DOESNT PICK UP ON IT
schizophrenia incarnate
thats like both tai and shauna
van 😎
YOURE OFF TRACK
van 😎
ANSWER ME DO YOU THINK SHE LIKES ME YES OR NO
schizophrenia incarnate
well do you want me to be honest
van 😎
yk what i want you to lie
schizophrenia incarnate
ok then
schizophrenia incarnate
no she doesnt like you back
van 😎
wait what
schizophrenia incarnate
what
van 😎
YOU THINK SHE LIKES ME BACK???
schizophrenia incarnate
YES???
schizophrenia incarnate
NOW GET BACK TO UR DATE WHAT ARE YOU DOING
van 😎
i literally ran into the bathroom to text you lollll
schizophrenia incarnate
WELL GO BACK TO YOUR GIRLFRIEND
van 😎
IM RUNNING
jackierabbit to “girlkissers official gc”:
Thursday, September 23, 2:46 P.M.
jackie 🍓
no but seriously
jackie 🍓
what do i do???
jackie 🍓
i cant just tell shauna that ik about it without seeming like a bitch
lottie 🦌
well maybe dont say anything about it
van 🔥
exactly she gets it
jackie 🍓
what do you mean dont say ANYTHING
lottie 🦌
what do you think i mean
jackie 🍓
but
van 🔥
SILENCE
taissa ⚽️
Jackie, she is probably going to tell you about it at some point.
jackie 🍓
what if she doesnt
taissa ⚽
Why wouldn’t she?
taissa ⚽
She’s your best friend, Jackie.
lottie 🦌
yeah if she is going with melissa shell tell you at some point
jackie 🍓
are you sure???
van 🔥
if shes really going with melissa fr then yes
jackie 🍓
which she is
taissa ⚽
Jackie, I really don’t think you have too much to worry about here.
lottie 🦌
yeah just give her a second and see what happens
jackie 🍓
ok i guess
jackie 🍓
misty said that shauna didnt want me to know tho
taissa ⚽
And you believe MISTY?
jackie 🍓
IM CONSIDERING IT
van 🔥
jackie whatever you do do NAWT believe misty
lottie 🦌
thats the worst possible thing you could do
jackie 🍓
why is this so confusing
taissa ⚽
Because everything is confusing?
jackie 🍓
im losing my grip on reality i think
lottie 🦌
girl i already did that
ss.shipman to nat_the_scat
Thursday, September 23, 2:49 P.M.
thing 2 (shauna)
NAT
thing 2 (shauna)
Can you keep a secret
nat 🚬
uh i think so
thing 2 (shauna)
Ok look
thing 2 (shauna)
Melissa asked me out
nat 🚬
wait what
nat 🚬
the jv girl??
thing 2 (shauna)
Yeah her
nat 🚬
oh sweet baby jesus
nat 🚬
what did you say
thing 2 (shauna)
Well I said no obviously
nat 🚬
did she cry
thing 2 (shauna)
No???
thing 2 (shauna)
I turned her down nicely I’m not a total bitch
nat 🚬
awww man
nat 🚬
i wish shed cried
thing 2 (shauna)
You’re evil
thing 2 (shauna)
Anyway
thing 2 (shauna)
I need you to help make sure Jackie doesn’t find out
nat 🚬
what
nat 🚬
why dont we want jackie finding out
thing 2 (shauna)
Because she’s going to get the wrong idea
thing 2 (shauna)
Plus I’m not even going with Melissa anyway so it’s pointless
nat 🚬
but arent you guys like best friends
nat 🚬
like you tell each other everything
thing 2 (shauna)
Look I’ll tell her eventually
thing 2 (shauna)
But I just don’t want to make unnecessary drama
thing 2 (shauna)
Plus Jackie’s already losing her mind over Nationals so I don’t want to freak her out more
nat 🚬
and what do you want me to do about this
thing 2 (shauna)
Just don’t say anything about it
thing 2 (shauna)
No one else probably knows because no one really likes Melissa so just make sure no one else tells Jackie
nat 🚬
mistys in melissas gc tho
thing 2 (shauna)
OH SHIT YOU’RE RIGHT
thing 2 (shauna)
I FORGOT ABOUT THAT
nat 🚬
i think everyone forgot mistys there most of the time tbh
thing 2 (shauna)
Ok well you take care of her
nat 🚬
NO WHY DO I HAVE TO TAKE CARE OF MISTY
thing 2 (shauna)
Because she’s obsessed with you
thing 2 (shauna)
Whatever you tell her to do she’ll do it no questions asked
nat 🚬
ew you make it sound like shes in love with me
thing 2 (shauna)
Honestly she probably is
nat 🚬
STOP TALKING OH MY GOD
thing 2 (shauna)
JUST MAKE SURE ITS A SECRET
thing 2 (shauna)
AS LONG AS JACKIE DOESNT FIND OUT THERE WONT BE A PROBLEM
nat 🚬
alright fine whatever
thing 2 (shauna)
Thank you Natalie
ss.shipman to jackierabbit
Thursday, September 23, 2:53 P.M.
SHAUNA ❤
So how was your talk with Jeff today
jackie 🍓
my what
SHAUNA ❤
Wasn’t that today
jackie 🍓
oh yeah
SHAUNA ❤
Were you able to sort things out
jackie 🍓
yeah i guess?
jackie 🍓
he was still being annoying as shit tho
SHAUNA ❤
Why annoying?
jackie 🍓
he kept saying that “ive been ignoring him or leaving him out or blahblahblah”
jackie 🍓
like if he wanted to come to the mall with us or whatever he should’ve just said that
SHAUNA ❤
Really
SHAUNA ❤
He was upset about the mall
jackie 🍓
well he asked if i wanted to hang out that day but i said no
jackie 🍓
like i might not be hanging out with him much but hes never trying
jackie 🍓
hes always ditching me for fucking randy idk what he expected
SHAUNA ❤
Yeah you guys don’t really go on dates
jackie 🍓
well because he never asks
SHAUNA ❤
Why don’t you ever ask?
jackie 🍓
well i cant
SHAUNA ❤
Why not
jackie 🍓
because hes a guy
jackie 🍓
arent guys supposed to do that
SHAUNA ❤
Not necessarily
jackie 🍓
well usually thats how it goes
SHAUNA ❤
Yeah I guess so
jackie 🍓
also shauna
SHAUNA ❤
Yeah?
jackie 🍓
is the plan still set for my party
jackie 🍓
any new developments i should know about
SHAUNA ❤
Nope not that I know of
jackie 🍓
you sure
SHAUNA ❤
Unless one of the others fucked something up then yes I’m positive nothing new has happened
jackie 🍓
ok thank god
jackie 🍓
i just really really hope nothing goes wrong
SHAUNA ❤
Jackie I know you’re really worried about this but nothing is going to go wrong
SHAUNA ❤
You just need to relax and trust the process
jackie 🍓
i know
jackie 🍓
but i cant help panicking
SHAUNA ❤
I totally get it but I assure you everything will be okay in the end
jackie 🍓
are you sure tho
SHAUNA ❤
Yes of course I’m sure Jackie
SHAUNA ❤
You need to remember that you’re a spectacular captain
jackie 🍓
shauna
jackie 🍓
you are so incredibly sweet do you know that
SHAUNA ❤
It’s just the truth
jackie 🍓
love u shauna <3
SHAUNA ❤
Love you too Jackie
travmartinez to nat_the_scat
Thursday, September 23, 3:00 P.M.
travis 👾
soooooooooooooo
rat girl 🤡
oh god
rat girl 🤡
what do you want
travis 👾
how did it go with your gf at school today
rat girl 🤡
SHUT UP SHES NOT MY GF
rat girl 🤡
I WILL BOX YOU
travis 👾
YOU ARE LITERALLY GOING ON A DATE
travis 👾
THAT MEANS YOURE DATING
rat girl 🤡
WHEN WE WERE DATING WE DIDNT GO ON A SINGLE DATE
travis 👾
yeah well
travis 👾
when we were dating we did pretty much everything wrong
rat girl 🤡
yeah ur kinda right 💀
travis 👾
so did you say anything about new york to her
rat girl 🤡
no not really?
travis 👾
IDIOT
rat girl 🤡
WHAT
rat girl 🤡
WHAT WAS I SUPPOSED TO DO
travis 👾
USE IT AS AN EXCUSE TO TALK TO HER
rat girl 🤡
NO
travis 👾
WHY NOT
rat girl 🤡
IF YOU KNEW HER YOU WOULD UNDERSTAND WHY I CANT DO THAT
travis 👾
THEN TELL ME WHO SHE IS
rat girl 🤡
NUH UH
travis 👾
YUH HUH
rat girl 🤡
she came up to me after school tho
rat girl 🤡
she told me about how we would get there and how long wed be there and all that
travis 👾
boring
rat girl 🤡
please be quiet i was hyperventilating
travis 👾
lmao gay
rat girl 🤡
SHUT THE FUCK UPPPPPPPPPP
travis 👾
DID YOU EVEN ATTEMPT TO FLIRT
rat girl 🤡
NO?????
rat girl 🤡
WE WERE TALKING ABOUT IMPORTANT INFORMATION
travis 👾
boring information
rat girl 🤡
look shut up i was too busy freaking out that she was talking to me
travis 👾
but when are you going
travis 👾
and when are you getting back
rat girl 🤡
well were basically leaving right after school tomorrow
rat girl 🤡
and getting back sunday afternoon
travis 👾
ugh so youre just ditching me with my dad and javi all weekend??
rat girl 🤡
yeah basically
travis 👾
you nasty little bitch
travis 👾
i hate you
rat girl 🤡
why did you date me then
travis 👾
well
travis 👾
if i said what i wanted to say id be silenced
rat girl 🤡
YOU FOUL DIRTY LITTLE SCUMBAG
travis 👾
NONONONO I DIDNT MEAN THAT 😭
taiturner to vantheman
Thursday, September 23, 3:15 P.M.
fine shyt <333333
Thanks for hanging out with me today, Van.
fine shyt <333333
I had a lot of fun.
van 😎
nuh uh
van 😎
thank YOU for inviting me
fine shyt <333333
It wasn’t as big as I was acting like it was, so I’m sorry if I got your hopes up.
van 😎
NONONONO IT WAS SO AWESOME
van 😎
see normally when someone says they have a surprise for me i think they wanna like take my organs or smth
fine shyt <333333
You think what?
van 😎
but this time i didnt think that
van 😎
so it all went right from the beginning
fine shyt <333333
I don’t know if that should disturb me or comfort me.
van 😎
what part of that is disturbing
fine shyt <333333
Van, how many horror movies have you seen?
van 😎
pardon
fine shyt <333333
I just don’t think it’s normal to constantly worry about having your organs stolen.
fine shyt <333333
How many horror movies have you watched?
van 😎
uhhhhhhhhh ive seen the fear street movies a million times
fine shyt <333333
Other than that?
fine shyt <333333
We all know you only watch Fear Street for the lesbians.
van 😎
HEHEHEHEHEHE guilty
van 😎
but other than that yeah ive seen other horror movies??
fine shyt <333333
Uh huh, how many?
van 😎
uhhhh
fine shyt <333333
Van, I swear to God.
van 😎
i plead the fifth
fine shyt <333333
That pretty much tells me all I need to know.
van 😎
oh shut up
van 😎
how many horror movies have YOU watched then
fine shyt <333333
Honestly?
fine shyt <333333
I haven’t seen any.
van 😎
YOU WHAT
fine shyt <333333
Yeah, they never seemed too interesting to me.
van 😎
well you NEED to watch some
fine shyt <333333
Oh, I NEED to?
van 😎
yeah you really do
van 😎
i can help you work on that
fine shyt <333333
Alright, I guess.
van 😎
YAYYYYYYYYYY
fine shyt <333333
Wait did you
fine shyt <333333
Did you just ask me out on a date?
fine shyt <333333
Like did you mean that as a date?
van 😎
uh
van 😎
maybe kinda potentially???
fine shyt <333333
Oh.
van 😎
well not like a DATE date
van 😎
i just meant it in a casual way
fine shyt <333333
A casual way?
van 😎
just yk its as much of a date as today was a date
fine shyt <333333
Today was a date?
van 😎
it wasnt??
fine shyt <333333
Uh
van 😎
i thought it was
fine shyt <333333
Well, I kinda
fine shyt <333333
Didn’t think that
van 😎
oh
fine shyt <333333
I really didn’t want to give you the wrong idea.
van 😎
oh god im sorry tai
van 😎
i just made this weird
fine shyt <333333
No, no, no, I promise you didn’t.
van 😎
nonono i totally misunderstood this whole thing
fine shyt <333333
Van, can you wait, please????
van 😎
was it a date or was it not a date
van 😎
just fucking tell me tai
fine shyt <333333
Look, I didn’t want you to get the idea that something was going on.
fine shyt <333333
But it wasn’t necessarily NOT a date.
van 😎
tai you are making absolutely no fucking sense
van 😎
it may or may not have been a date but you dont even like me???
fine shyt <333333
Is that even important right now???
van 😎
YES ITS FUCKING IMPORTANT
fine shyt <333333
Do YOU like me???
van 😎
it doesnt matter anyway
van 😎
i fucked this whole thing up
vantheman to nat_the_scat
Thursday, September 23, 3:21 P.M.
redhead disease 🧡
NAT PLEASE HELP
redhead disease 🧡
I MESSED UP
nat 🚬
WAIT WAIT WAIT WAIT WHAT
nat 🚬
WHAT HAPPENED
redhead disease 🧡
TAI TOOK ME OUT TODAY AND I THOUGHT IT WAS A DATE BUT IT WASNT
redhead disease 🧡
AND SHE SAID SHE DIDNT WANT ME TO THINK ANYTHING WAS GOING ON
nat 🚬
VAN WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT
redhead disease 🧡
(insert screenshot)
nat 🚬
OH MY GOD IM GONNA KILL HER
redhead disease 🧡
NO PLEASE DONT
nat 🚬
VAN YOU ARE LITERALLY HAVING A BREAKDOWN
redhead disease 🧡
WHAT DO I DO
redhead disease 🧡
I FUCKED THIS UP HELP MEEEE
nat 🚬
OK WHAT YOU NEED TO DO IS RELAX
nat 🚬
TAKE A STEP BACK AND LEAVE THIS ALONE
redhead disease 🧡
JUST DO NOTHING?????
nat 🚬
THATS NOT WHAT IM SAYING
nat 🚬
you cant fix this immediately so you need to give it time
redhead disease 🧡
how much time????
nat 🚬
i dont know but its going to take tai a while to stop going insane over this
nat 🚬
it doesnt sound like she knows what shes doing so you have to back off of her and give her some space
redhead disease 🧡
how do i do that
nat 🚬
van im not gonna fucking tell you what to do
nat 🚬
but you need to leave tai alone for a bit until youve figured shit out and youre ready to talk
redhead disease 🧡
okay
redhead disease 🧡
just not talk to her????
nat 🚬
until neither of you are panicking yeah
redhead disease 🧡
i think i can do that
nat 🚬
okay thank you jesus
taiturner to fleetwoodlottie
Thursday, September 23, 3:28 P.M.
future dirt eater
LOTTIE I NEED YOUR HELP
future dirt eater
I MADE A MASSIVE MISTAKE
lottie 🦌
omg thats a first
future dirt eater
SHUT UP I’M PANICKINF
lottie 🦌
oh my god you made a typo
lottie 🦌
OH MY GOD YOU MADE A TYPO THIS IS SERIOUS
future dirt eater
YEAH NO SHIT IT’S SERIOUS
future dirt eater
VAN THOUGHT TODAY WAS A DATE AND I MESSED IT ALL UP
lottie 🦌
it wasnt a date??
future dirt eater
That’s exactly what Van said.
lottie 🦌
look tai idk what the fuck you said but you need to talk to her
lottie 🦌
you have to try and sort this out before it gets crazy
future dirt eater
It’s already crazy.
lottie 🦌
TRY AND FIX IT THEN
lottie 🦌
IM NOT A FUCKING THERAPIST YOU NEED TO FIGURE THIS OUT
future dirt eater
OKAY OKAY GOD
lottie 🦌
STOP WASTING YOUR TIME WITH ME AND GO TEXT VAN
future dirt eater
I'M GOING
taiturner to vantheman
Thursday, September 23, 3:30 P.M.
fine shyt <333333
Van, can we please just talk about this??
do you want to block taiturner?
yes no
vantheman to nat_the_scat
Thursday, September 23, 2:31 P.M.
redhead disease 🧡
i blocked her
nat 🚬
jesus christ van
Notes:
...okay yeah so tai and van did that. don't be mad, they're just useless lesbians who cant communicate. but they WILL sort their shit out soon, I promise!!!
i apologize for the insane amount of miscommunication in this chapter, i hate it as a trope but i end up writing it unknowingly
i also came up with a new idea for a new yellowjackets fic that i may post soon...let me know if you would want to read some kind of fantasy royalty/pirate au with these loser lesbians bc the idea is possessing me
Chapter 6: how to get a girlfriend (by the wiskayok girls soccer team)
Summary:
things are starting to get fixed? tai and van are trying to get their shit together, lottie and nat are losing it to the point where they need their EXES for a confidence boost (help them 😭) jackie is just trying to be a friendly neighborhood lesbian, and shauna actually says something relevant. what a moment in history.
Notes:
i have an idea for another, actual STORY yellowjackets fic that will probably be longer and worse written than this one but the idea is possessing me help 😭
yes this chapter is out a lot sooner than the others, so I hope it doesn't seem rushed or its bad!!
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
taiturner to nat_the_scat
Friday, September 24, 3:30 P.M.
Tai
Natalie.
Natalie
JESUS CHRIST JUMPSCARE
Tai
What?
Natalie
nothing i just didnt expect you to text me actin like dracula
Tai
You’re very confusing.
Natalie
yeah ik
Natalie
whats up
Tai
Do you have any idea what’s going on with Van?
Natalie
van??
Tai
Yes, she blocked me after a little altercation last night.
Tai
And she was avoiding me all day at school today.
Natalie
JESUS CHRIST THAT IDIOT
Tai
Excuse me?
Natalie
look van texted me yesterday freaking out about that whole aLtErCaTion
Natalie
and i decided to be stupid and tell her that the best thing for her to do was take a step back and relax before she made anything worse
Tai
That’s actually kind of smart.
Natalie
well either way van took it to mean “block you and stay away from you”
Natalie
which was NOT what i wanted her to do
Tai
I see.
Tai
And what did you want her to do?
Natalie
honestly im not totally sure
Natalie
but not THIS
Tai
Yeah, I get it.
Natalie
yeah tai im really sorry
Tai
Why are you sorry?
Natalie
because its my fault van blocked you and avoided you
Natalie
i thought it would help if you both had time to relax but i made shit worse
Tai
No, Natalie, you didn’t make anything worse.
Tai
I actually think that your advice was pretty good.
Natalie
really
Tai
Yes, really.
Tai
It’s not your fault me and Van are in this situation.
Tai
We kinda did this to ourselves.
Natalie
yeah you lowkey did
Tai
Wow, thanks, that’s helpful.
Natalie
hey you said it not me
Natalie
but tai i need to tell you something
Tai
What is it?
Natalie
van and i have been friends since we were really little
Natalie
and i care about her a lot
Tai
Oh, I know where this is going.
Natalie
do you actually like her
Tai
What?
Natalie
do you actually honest to god like van
Tai
Yes, I actually, honest-to-god like Van.
Tai
I’ve been in love with her for about a year now, actually.
Natalie
okay thats all i needed to know
Natalie
look im not involving myself in this anymore so i can tell you how vans doing but im staying FARRRRRR away from advice
Natalie
got it
Tai
Understood.
Tai
How is Van, by the way?
Tai
I hope she’s not too upset.
Natalie
well shes not like DEVASTATED or anything
Natalie
shes just really jumpy
Tai
Jumpy how?
Natalie
shes just really anxious
Natalie
she got really quiet and she hasnt been yapping as much as usual
Natalie
which for van is obviously a problem
Tai
Obviously.
Natalie
yeah i suggest you try and talk to her soon
Tai
That was my plan.
Natalie
of course it was
jackierabbit to ss.shipman
Friday, September 24, 3:41 P.M.
jackie 🍓
hey so am i insane
jackie 🍓
or are tai and van avoiding each other???
SHAUNA ❤
What do you mean
jackie 🍓
you didnt notice??
jackie 🍓
at school and at practice they were hardly even talking
jackie 🍓
or it seemed like tai was trying to talk but van was ignoring her which is weird to say the very least
jackie 🍓
i feel like im in the twilight zone
SHAUNA ❤
None of them told you
jackie 🍓
tell me what
jackie 🍓
why am i always left out of this shit
SHAUNA ❤
I have no idea I thought you knew
SHAUNA ❤
Look Tai just told me so don’t take it personally
jackie 🍓
shauna what happened i am so lost 😭
SHAUNA ❤
Tai took Van to that Willowgrove Bakery she loves yesterday
SHAUNA ❤
And Van thought it was a date and Tai panicked and said it wasn’t
jackie 🍓
THAT STUPID BITCH
jackie 🍓
SHE SAID WHAT
SHAUNA ❤
I SWEAR I SAID THE SAME THING
SHAUNA ❤
But apparently they got into a VERY sexually tense argument
jackie 🍓
oh damn fr??
SHAUNA ❤
Yeah she showed me the texts
SHAUNA ❤
But then it seemed like Van totally freaked out and then blocked Tai
jackie 🍓
istg these two are going to kill me off at some point
jackie 🍓
they OBVIOUSLY like each other why cant they just TALK
SHAUNA ❤
RIGHT?
SHAUNA ❤
LIKE IT’S LITERALLY SO EASY
jackie 🍓
LIKE????
jackie 🍓
so how do we get them to talk to each other
SHAUNA ❤
Excuse me?
jackie 🍓
how do we help them sort their shit out
SHAUNA ❤
We
jackie 🍓
yes we shauna
jackie 🍓
yk damn well i cant do shit without ur big brain
SHAUNA ❤
Well are we sure they even want our help
jackie 🍓
what
jackie 🍓
why wouldnt they want our help
SHAUNA ❤
I’m not even sure if I was allowed to tell you about this
SHAUNA ❤
I don’t think Tai wanted you to know
jackie 🍓
why would she not want me to know
SHAUNA ❤
Look maybe she wants it to be as quiet as possible
SHAUNA ❤
She’s probably embarrassed
jackie 🍓
but i just want to help her out
jackie 🍓
i mean the teams fucked if they wont even look in each others direction
SHAUNA ❤
I get it but I’m just not sure what’s going on in Tai’s fucked up head
jackie 🍓
look if shes having a problem then i wanna talk to her
jackie 🍓
i dont want her to just deal with this shit alone
SHAUNA ❤
Ok fine but don’t tell her I told you
SHAUNA ❤
I think she knows I would tell you everything at some point but just to be safe
jackie 🍓
of course you got it
jackie 🍓
ill just blame it on natalie
SHAUNA ❤
NO DON’T DO THAT EITHER
jackierabbit to taiturner
Friday, September 24, 3:45 P.M.
jackie 🍓
hey tai!!
taissa ⚽
Yeah, what’s up?
jackie 🍓
is everything okay???
jackie 🍓
you didnt tell me something happened with you and van
taissa ⚽
Did I have to tell you?
jackie 🍓
well you didnt HAVE to
jackie 🍓
but i wish you did yeah
taissa ⚽
Look, I only need to tell anyone I want to.
taissa ⚽
It’s my personal business.
jackie 🍓
well yeah but i had no idea and that kind of thing really sucks
jackie 🍓
its just that im the captain so i wanna know whats happening with you all
taissa ⚽
Jackie, you can’t expect me to tell you all my secrets just because you’re the captain.
jackie 🍓
nonononono tai thats not what i meant!!
taissa ⚽
You don’t have to know what’s going on with me because you’re the captain.
jackie 🍓
youre right
jackie 🍓
but i WANT to know whats going on with you because im your friend
taissa ⚽
Oh.
jackie 🍓
i want you to be able to trust me with that stuff
jackie 🍓
ik that a lot of you dont like telling me things but i do like you tai
jackie 🍓
and if you have a problem or need help i just want to be able to help you out
taissa ⚽
Okay, I get that.
jackie 🍓
but youre right it is your business
jackie 🍓
so i can like go if you want
taissa ⚽
No, it’s alright.
taissa ⚽
I think it might actually be good to talk to someone.
jackie 🍓
you think 😭
taissa ⚽
I really have no idea.
jackie 🍓
well i heard you and van got into a fight??
taissa ⚽
You mean Shauna told you what happened.
jackie 🍓
shhhhhhh
taissa ⚽
Would it kill you to be honest?
jackie 🍓
right now yeah
jackie 🍓
were bonding
taissa ⚽
Oh, is that what we’re doing?
jackie 🍓
yes now tell me
taissa ⚽
Well, I’d say that “fight” is a little dramatic.
taissa ⚽
It was more like a misunderstanding that got out of hand.
jackie 🍓
but now youre not talking
taissa ⚽
I said it got out of hand.
jackie 🍓
look tai i know i might not be the most observant person
jackie 🍓
but everyone on the team can see that you two like each other
taissa ⚽
Whether Van likes me or not, she’s totally freaked out.
taissa ⚽
I think I probably made things a lot worse, so I’m most likely the one who has to try and fix things.
jackie 🍓
i mean if she blocked you then she might need to apologize too
jackie 🍓
but you both seem pretty upset about this so i can tell you both WANT to make things better
taissa ⚽
Yeah, we can both tell that.
taissa ⚽
Or at least I can.
taissa ⚽
But I think we’re both really bad at communicating that sort of thing.
jackie 🍓
oh no SHIT 💀
taissa ⚽
Huh?
jackie 🍓
weve watched you guys pine over each other for YEARSSSSSS
jackie 🍓
let us REST
taissa ⚽
Okay, now you’re just being ridiculous.
jackie 🍓
well i think nat has to deal with the worst of it
jackie 🍓
from what i hear vans been telling her everything this whole time
jackie 🍓
thats probably why shes so desperate for you guys to fuck it out
taissa ⚽
NONONO YOU’RE GETTING AHEAD OF YOURSELF
jackie 🍓
NONONONO BE SO FR
taissa ⚽
GOODBYE
nat_the_scat to vantheman
Friday, September 24, 3:50 P.M.
blonde piranha
van
blonde piranha
dont be mad
van 😎
oh no what did you do
blonde piranha
i talked to tai
van 😎
MOTHERFUCKER YOU DID WHAT
blonde piranha
SHE TEXTED ME OKAY
van 😎
SHE texted YOU
blonde piranha
yup
van 😎
she communicated
van 😎
taissa fucking turner fucking COMMUNICATED????
blonde piranha
YUPPPPP
van 😎
WHOTTTT
van 😎
THIS IS A MOMENT IN HISTORY
blonde piranha
I KNOW I WAS FLABBERGASTED TOO
van 😎
WHAT WAS THE OCCASION
blonde piranha
she was asking about you
van 😎
oh jesus christ
blonde piranha
she was just asking what happened and why youre mad
van 😎
she doesnt know why im mad???
blonde piranha
no shes just confused
blonde piranha
shes been trying to talk to you at school and she doesnt know what to do
van 😎
jesus
blonde piranha
and thats not your fault
blonde piranha
i know youre thinking that but its not
blonde piranha
you both just acted stupid
van 😎
how do you always know what im thinking
blonde piranha
you do it to me too
van 😎
do i
blonde piranha
yeah
blonde piranha
lottie says were platonic soulmates
van 😎
that makes a lot of sense actually
blonde piranha
yeah it kinda does
van 😎
it explains why we have telepathy
blonde piranha
and why we have the same mood swings
van 😎
and why our periods probably synced up at least once
blonde piranha
youre also incredibly easy to read
van 😎
am i actually
blonde piranha
fuck yeah
blonde piranha
maybe just to me bc ive known you since we were in diapers but still
van 😎
does everyone else know about me and tai by now
blonde piranha
know what
blonde piranha
that you got in a fight
blonde piranha
or that you want each other
van 😎
both?????
blonde piranha
ok so the people who know u want each otherrrr
blonde piranha
me jackie shauna misty laura lee lottie gen melissa mari akilah travis and probably jeff
van 😎
TRAVIS
van 😎
YOU TOLD FUCKING TRAVIs???
blonde piranha
YEAH???
blonde piranha
HES LIKE MY BEST FRIEND ASIDE FROM YOU
van 😎
NAT WHYYY NOOOO
blonde piranha
look he wont tell anyone
blonde piranha
plus he hangs around us all the time so even if i didnt tell him he would definitely find out himself at some point
van 😎
oh so im not slick
blonde piranha
neither of you are slick be fr
van 😎
who knows were arguing
blonde piranha
uhhhhh me and lottie
blonde piranha
i think shauna knows so that means jackie knows too
van 😎
of fucking course 😭
blonde piranha
but other than that i think that’s it
blonde piranha
at least those are the people who know what happened
blonde piranha
but im sure other people suspect something happened
van 😎
do u think laura lee or misty know
blonde piranha
probably not????
van 😎
oh thank FUCK
van 😎
laura lee would probably try and pray for me 💀
blonde piranha
She probably already is
blonde piranha
i think its more likely that laura lee would know than misty but for now i think theyre both pretty clueless
van 😎
okay can we keep it that way
blonde piranha
not entirely sure
blonde piranha
if jackie knows shes going to try and make everything better because thats how she works so someone else will find out at some point
van 😎
can i rant to you this weekend
van 😎
like i think i need to cry into something and you would work
blonde piranha
oh shit sorry i cant
blonde piranha
but we can call???
van 😎
wait why not
blonde piranha
im busy
van 😎
youre WHAT
blonde piranha
busy???
van 😎
i just had a stroke
blonde piranha
what why
van 😎
youre never busy
van 😎
youre always doing nothing at home and complaining about how bored you are
van 😎
youre either napping or getting wasted
blonde piranha
well this weekend im doing something
van 😎
what the fuck are you doing
blonde piranha
lotties taking me to new york for a few days
van 😎
WHAT
van 😎
YOURE GOING ON A DATE????
blonde piranha
NO IM NOT
blonde piranha
ITS NOT A DATE WHY DOES EVERYONE KEEP SAYING THAT
van 😎
TF U MEAN SHES “TAKING YOU TO NEW YORK”
van 😎
LIKE A DOG
blonde piranha
NO WHAT????
blonde piranha
HER DADS TAKING HER ON SOME BUSINESS THING AND SHE ASKED IF I WANTED TO COME
blonde piranha
WERE LITERALLY OTW THERE RIGHT NOW
van 😎
aw shyt her dads there???
blonde piranha
yeah but hes got work so were just gonna walk around manhattan this weekend
blonde piranha
at least i think thats the plan
blonde piranha
neither of us are good at plans
van 😎
so youre gonna be aimlessly wandering in new york
van 😎
aka gay central
van 😎
alone
blonde piranha
SHUT UP LESBIAN
van 😎
AYO WATCH YOUR MOUTH
blonde piranha
ITS NOT LIKE THAT
van 😎
but you like her???
blonde piranha
honestly???
blonde piranha
i have no idea
van 😎
ooooooooooooooooo
blonde piranha
i just dont hate her as much anymore
van 😎
i mean thats something???
blonde piranha
i think so????
blonde piranha
but like i have no idea fr
van 😎
yeah well youre gonna find out something this weekend
blonde piranha
how the fuck do you know that
van 😎
i just do
blonde piranha
youve just got some weird hunch
van 😎
yeah basically
blonde piranha
the hunch is wrong
van 😎
nuh uh
blonde piranha
yuh huh
van 😎
nuh uh just wait 😈
travmartinez to nat_the_scat
Friday, September 24, 4:49 P.M.
daddy issues #2
dads making me fucking babysit javi this weekend 😭
nat 🚬
OH NOOOOOOOOO
nat 🚬
why cant that old ass man do it himself
daddy issues #2
hes got a business trip or smth
nat 🚬
business trip????
nat 🚬
what the hell typa business trip
nat 🚬
hes a fucking high school soccer coach
daddy issues #2
idk thats what he told my mom
daddy issues #2
and then he just dipped out
nat 🚬
damn bro im sorry
daddy issues #2
its ok
daddy issues #2
cheer me up
nat 🚬
how
daddy issues #2
hows everything going with ur fine shyt
nat 🚬
she is NOT MY FINE SHYT
daddy issues #2
but is she fine shyt
nat 🚬
im not answering that
daddy issues #2
BOOOOOOOO 🍅🍅🍅🍅
nat 🚬
TF U WANT ME TO SAY 😭
daddy issues #2
arent you guys otw to new york
nat 🚬
oh yeah we just got to the hotel
daddy issues #2
is it fancy
nat 🚬
yes
nat 🚬
i feel like a little dirty roach
nat 🚬
im just hiding behind her bc shes tall
daddy issues #2
adding that to the list of things i know about this girl
nat 🚬
what the hell is even on that list
daddy issues #2
tall
daddy issues #2
rich
daddy issues #2
fine
daddy issues #2
wants you
nat 🚬
loud incorrect buzzer
daddy issues #2
on which one
nat 🚬
the last one
daddy issues #2
how are you so sure
nat 🚬
why am i so fucking cold
daddy issues #2
DONT CHANGE THE SUBJECT
nat 🚬
there are so many rich people in this lobby
nat 🚬
i feel like i might have picked the wrong clothes
daddy issues #2
well actually it was ME who picked out the clothes
daddy issues #2
you just tried them on while having thirty seven mental breakdowns
nat 🚬
ok fine YOU picked out the wrong clothes
daddy issues #2
nope
nat 🚬
what do you mean no
daddy issues #2
i never do that
daddy issues #2
trust me if the rich people dont like it then she will
nat 🚬
how do you know that
daddy issues #2
look ive literally DATED you
daddy issues #2
ive known you for long enough to know what you can and cant pull off
daddy issues #2
plus youre just gonna be walking around manhattan so no ones really gonna care
nat 🚬
ok fine thats fair enough
nat 🚬
BUT TRAVIS YOU SHOULD SEE HER RIGHT NOW
nat 🚬
SHE LOOKS LIKE SOME KIND OF MEDIEVAL LORD OF THE RINGS ELF PRINCESS
nat 🚬
AND I DIDNT CHANGE OUT OF MY HOBO SCHOOL CLOTHES
daddy issues #2
you know what i think
nat 🚬
oh god
nat 🚬
what
daddy issues #2
i think you like her
nat 🚬
SHUT UP
daddy issues #2
NO
nat 🚬
THAT IS SO UNRELATED
daddy issues #2
I SWEAR ITS NOT
nat 🚬
NO BUT TRAVIS YOU HAVE TO UNDERSTAND IM PANICKING
nat 🚬
SHE LET ME LISTEN TO FLEETWOOD MAC W HER ON THE TRAIN
daddy issues #2
she likes fleetwood mac
nat 🚬
yeah and laufey
daddy issues #2
ADDING THAT TO THE LIST
nat 🚬
FUCK YOU AND FUCK UR LIST YOU HO
fleetwoodlottie to jesuslovesyou
Friday, September 24, 5:01 P.M.
lottie 🦌
hey ll????
little angel <3
Yes Lottie?
little angel <3
What’s going on?
lottie 🦌
random question
lottie 🦌
why did you date me
little angel <3
Pardon??
lottie 🦌
like what did i do to get you to like me
lottie 🦌
what was it about me that did that
little angel <3
Is this about Natalie?
lottie 🦌
maybe?
little angel <3
Lottie you didn’t “do” anything to get me to like you
little angel <3
I liked you on my own because you’re incredibly smart, funny, and sweet
little angel <3
You’re a very likeable person and anyone would be lucky to have you
lottie 🦌
OMG THANK YOU SO MUCH LAURA LEE YOURE SO SWEET 😭
lottie 🦌
im just asking bc im super nervous and confused
little angel <3
You have no need to be Lottie!
little angel <3
You don’t have to do anything to get Natalie to like you, same as with me
lottie 🦌
is this you telling me to just be myself
little angel <3
Not quite
little angel <3
This is me telling you not to try too hard because people will like you on their own without anything special
little angel <3
I’m sure you don’t need to worry about Natalie not liking you either
lottie 🦌
wait what do you mean by that
little angel <3
:)
lottie 🦌
LAURA LEE??????
jackierabbit to ss.shipman
Friday, September 24, 5:16 P.M.
jackie 🍓
hey shauna
jackie 🍓
can i ask something stupid??
SHAUNA ❤
You’ve never had to ask before
jackie 🍓
what
SHAUNA ❤
That’s a yes
jackie 🍓
okay 💀
jackie 🍓
remember when misty said that melissa had a crush on you??
SHAUNA ❤
Oh God don’t remind me
SHAUNA ❤
But yeah
jackie 🍓
would you ever like go out with her??
SHAUNA ❤
Melissa??
jackie 🍓
no just like any girl
jackie 🍓
to figure out if you liked girls or not yk
SHAUNA ❤
I don’t really need Melissa to help me figure that out
jackie 🍓
what do you mean
SHAUNA ❤
Okay well I was gonna tell you this in person
SHAUNA ❤
But here we are
jackie 🍓
we can talk about it irl tomorrow
SHAUNA ❤
That probably won’t help but thank you regardless
jackie 🍓
np!!!
jackie 🍓
whats up
SHAUNA ❤
I don’t need Melissa to help me figure out if I like girls or not
SHAUNA ❤
Because I already know the answer
jackie 🍓
you do
SHAUNA ❤
Yes
jackie 🍓
oh
SHAUNA ❤
Jackie
SHAUNA ❤
I’m bisexual
jackie 🍓
really
SHAUNA ❤
Yes really
SHAUNA ❤
It took a little while but I was able to figure it out
jackie 🍓
thats really really great for you shauna!!!
jackie 🍓
thank you so much for telling me
SHAUNA ❤
Of course
SHAUNA ❤
It was just really important to me that you knew
jackie 🍓
you wanna call for a little while??
SHAUNA ❤
I would love to
Notes:
yes I KNOW shauna's coming out wasn't as big as I was planning it to be but its literally a TEXT what am I supposed to do I'm sorry
tai and van are on the way to fixing things you guys!! yay!!
lottie and laura lee/travis and nat friends to exes to friends again is always my fav
Chapter 7: matcha, records, and abrupt gc love confessions
Summary:
TAI AND VAN FINALLY GET THEIR SHIT TOGETHER. lottienats NYC date goes incredible and then nat ALSO gets her shit together. everyone's getting it together...except jackie and shauna, they're kinda doing worse
Notes:
GUYS i officially have a plot in my head!! that means that i'll probably be putting out actual good chapters and not my usual chaotic bullshit, but its still gonna be like this the rest of the way!!!
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
taiturner to “BUZZ BUZZ BUZZ 🐝”.
Saturday, September 25, 9:09 A.M.
taissa ⚽
All right, since Van still won’t let me talk to her, I’m going to try and talk through here.
taissa ⚽
This is going to be embarrassing, so none of you say anything.
nat 🚬
oh my god
nat 🚬
should i screen record this???
jackie 🍓
TAI WHEN I SAID COMMUNICATE I DIDNT MEAN IN THE PUBLIC GC
SHAUNA ❤
Jackie let her do her thing
taissa ⚽
Thank you, Shauna.
jackie 🍓
this is gonna be hilarious i can already tell
misty 🍄
Lol should i get my popcorn??
lottie 🦌
im already getting breakfast
lottie 🦌
btw nat do u want me to bring you back a muffin or something
jackie 🍓
what???
nat 🚬
oooh yes blueberry please
jackie 🍓
WHAT???
jackie 🍓
what are you doing
laura lee 😇
You two are hanging out?
SHAUNA ❤
Lottie’s buying you MUFFINS??
misty 🍄
Did you two go somewhere?? :)
jackie 🍓
misty that smiley face seems a little menacing
misty 🍄
What do you mean? :)
SHAUNA ❤
For fuck’s sake
jackie 🍓
thats it guys this is an alternate dimension
lottie 🦌
its really nothing big
lottie 🦌
i just took nat with me and my dad to new york
lottie 🦌
we should be back later tomorrow
jackie 🍓
HOLY SHIT NEW YORK????
nat 🚬
also shauna stfu shes just getting food because i slept late
misty 🍄
That sounds like fun!! ^_^
laura lee 😇
That’s lovely!!
laura lee 😇
I hope you’re enjoying yourselves!!
taissa ⚽
SHUT THE FUCK UP ALL OF YOU
taissa ⚽
THIS ISN’T IMPORTANT
taissa ⚽
WHERE IS VAN
jackie 🍓
OH SHIT RIGHT
lottie 🦌
VAN CMON NOW
nat 🚬
VAN I KNOW YOURE THERE
jackie 🍓
VAN SPEAK UP!!!
SHAUNA ❤️
SAY SOMETHING VAN
taissa ⚽️
Van, please talk to me.
laura lee 😇
What happened with Van?
misty 🍄
Why isn’t she responding?
jackie 🍓
very very long story
taissa ⚽️
Van, I’m trying to fix things.
taissa ⚽️
You can’t just ghost after blocking me for no reason.
van 🔥
FOR NO REASON???
nat 🚬
ohhhhh shiiiiiitttt
lottie 🦌
there she is
jackie 🍓
VAN OH MY GOD
van 🔥
YOU DONT GET TO SAY IT WAS FOR NO REASON
van 🔥
I BLOCKED YOU BECAUSE YOU TOOK ME ON A FUCKING DATE AND THEN DROPPED ME
taissa ⚽️
I never even did that.
taissa ⚽️
You’re being dramatic.
van 🔥
IM BEING FUCKING DRAMATIC???
jackie 🍓
VAN PLEASE I CAN FEEL YOUR LESBIAN RAGE THROUGH THE SCREEN 😭
SHAUNA ❤️
Now I get what Tai meant when she said this would be embarrassing
van 🔥
IM NOT DRAMATIC YOURE FULL OF LITERAL SHIT
van 🔥
YOU TOLD ME YOU DIDNT LIKE ME AND THEN EXPECTED ME TO BE OKAY WITH IT???
lottie 🦌
tai you told her WHAT
taissa ⚽️
I NEVER SAID THAT
van 🔥
WELL THATS WHAT IT FUCKING SOUNDED LIKE
taissa ⚽️
I’M BEING SERIOUS VAN
taissa ⚽️
I’M TRYING TO TALK TO YOU
van 🔥
DONT FUCKING BOTHER NOW
van 🔥
YOU DIDNT WANNA TALK BEFORE
taissa ⚽️
YEAH BECAUSE YOU BLOCKED ME RIGHT BEFORE I WAS ABOUT TO TELL YOU
van 🔥
TELL ME WHAT?!?!?!
taissa ⚽️
THAT I’M IN LOVE WITH YOU
jackie 🍓
WHOAAAAAAA
nat 🚬
HOLY SHIT
misty 🍄
Oh wow!!!!
lottie 🦌
I JUST AUDIBLY GASPED IN THE MIDDLE OF A CAFE
nat 🚬
OOOOH GET ME A COFFEE TOO
jackie 🍓
TAI ARE YOU OKAY
SHAUNA ❤️
Tai did you just confess over text 😭
lottie 🦌
no fr who does that 💀
nat 🚬
pussies
SHAUNA ❤️
Exactly
laura lee 😇
Wait where did Van go??
jackie 🍓
oh shit she just went offline
misty 🍄
Oh no!!!
SHAUNA ❤️
VAN COME ON
taissa ⚽️
Van, please.
jackie 🍓
EVERYONE SPAM THE CHAT
laura lee 😇
What do we say???
SHAUNA ❤️
ANYTHING
nat 🚬
FART
misty 🍄
BARK
jackie 🍓
VANNNNNNN
laura lee 😇
Vanessa????
lottie 🦌
VAN VAN VAN VAN
taissa ⚽️
VANESSA FUCKING PALMER
jackie 🍓
VAN COME BACK HERE
nat 🚬
i am on the edge of my fucking seat right now
taissa ⚽️
Van, can you please just talk to me?
van 🔥
what is there to talk about
SHAUNA ❤️
Uh a lot of things?
jackie 🍓
shhhhhh shauna
SHAUNA ❤️
Fine
van 🔥
make up your mind
taissa ⚽️
What???
van 🔥
you like me but then you ditch me after a literal DATE???
taissa ⚽️
I PANICKED!!!
taissa ⚽️
I’VE LIKED YOU FOR A LONG TIME SHAUNA BACK ME UP
SHAUNA ❤️
That’s true she has
taissa ⚽️
AND WHY DID YOU FUCKING BLOCK ME?
van 🔥
BECAUSE I LOVE YOU TOO YOU FUCKING DUMBASS
SHAUNA ❤️
OH MY GOD WHAT IS THIS
jackie 🍓
I JUST FELL OFF MY BED
misty 🍄
THIS IS SO INTENSE WOAH
lottie 🦌
OMGOMGOMGOMG
taissa ⚽️
You do??
van 🔥
yes i really do
van 🔥
nat back me up
nat 🚬
she’s obsessed w u tai ive seen it
lottie 🦌
i can back both of you up you’re obsessed with each other
lottie 🦌
ive been playing couples therapist for four years
nat 🚬
and they didn’t even know they were a couple yet 💀
misty 🍄
Wait so you all knew they liked each other?
laura lee 😇
I didn’t, at least
jackie 🍓
why does no one tell me shit 😭
taissa ⚽️
So you like me back?
van 🔥
yeah i fucking love you tai
taissa ⚽️
Oh.
van 🔥
yeah
jackie 🍓
TOOK YOU LONG ENOUGH
laura lee 😇
HALLELUJAH!!(?)
lottie 🦌
i screenshotted all that just so you know
nat 🚬
oh my god is heaven really real
laura lee 😇
Yes???
misty 🍄
YAYYYY!!!
SHAUNA ❤️
This is the sound of angels singing
fleetwoodlottie to nat_the_scat
Saturday, September 25, 9:19 A.M.
NOT a spawn from hell???
DID YOU SEE THAT
nat 🚬
I SAW THAT
nat 🚬
AAAAAAAAAAAAA
NOT a spawn from hell???
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA FINALLY
NOT a spawn from hell???
I FEEL LIKE I NEED TO PRAY
nat 🚬
i think laura lee has that covered
NOT a spawn from hell???
STOP IM GIGGLING
nat 🚬
I FEEL LIKE I COULD OVERTAKE THE FUCKING THRONE RIGHT NOW IM NOT EVEN JOKING
nat 🚬
IM DOING A FUCKING CELEBRATION DANCE IN THE FUCKING HOTEL ROOM
NOT a spawn from hell???
youre celebrating because of tai and van getting together???
nat 🚬
no im celebrating my freedom after four years of listening to “taissa turner is the love of my life and responsible for 98% of my heat”
NOT a spawn from hell???
now THATS worth celebrating
nat 🚬
you get it
NOT a spawn from hell???
im on the way back btw
NOT a spawn from hell???
(insert photo)
NOT a spawn from hell???
got you a muffin and a coffee
nat 🚬
fucking saint
nat 🚬
what did you get
NOT a spawn from hell???
a cinnamon roll and a matcha
nat 🚬
oh my god of COURSE youre a fucking matcha person
NOT a spawn from hell???
the fuck does that mean
nat 🚬
it means you have the vibes of someone who likes drinking grass lattes
NOT a spawn from hell???
did you just call matcha GRASS LATTES
nat 🚬
YES I FUCKING DID
NOT a spawn from hell???
WELL JOKES ON YOU COFFEE IS BEAN JUICE
nat 🚬
GOOD BEAN JUICE
nat 🚬
im pushing you in front of a car today
NOT a spawn from hell???
oh speaking of which
NOT a spawn from hell???
theres a special shop i want you to see today
nat 🚬
what kinda shop
NOT a spawn from hell???
its a surprise
NOT a spawn from hell???
wanna go??
nat 🚬
yk what sure
NOT a spawn from hell???
great :)
nat_the_scat to travmartinez
Saturday, September 25, 9:21 A.M.
rat girl 🤡
have you cleaned javis shit yet
travis 👾
have you made out with that girl yet
rat girl 🤡
die 🧹
travis 👾
whats the broom for
rat girl 🤡
its a threat
rat girl 🤡
im whooping ur ass with it if you say that shit again
travis 👾
yo ill answer your question when you answer mine
rat girl 🤡
ill shoot you first
travis 👾
hows new york going
rat girl 🤡
FUCKING AWESOME
travis 👾
day one was at least???
rat girl 🤡
day one was amazing
rat girl 🤡
we checked into this big fucking fancy hotel with room service
travis 👾
are you in the same room as her
rat girl 🤡
unfortunately
rat girl 🤡
but its pretty chill it feels like a sleepover
travis 👾
i just laughed at my phone screen and now javi thinks i have a girlfriend
rat girl 🤡
you could never
travis 👾
SHUT UP
travis 👾
KEEP TELLING ME ABOUT YOUR GAY NEW YORK DAY
rat girl 🤡
RIGHT
rat girl 🤡
so after we were lazy in our hotel for a little while
rat girl 🤡
we started walking around and went to a bunch of stores
travis 👾
details
travis 👾
i want details
rat girl 🤡
be quiet
travis 👾
please tell me what happened im so bored
rat girl 🤡
well first she got me boba for the first time ever
travis 👾
was it good
rat girl 🤡
surprisingly yes
rat girl 🤡
then we went to a barnes and noble to look at funko pops and posters and shit and i got a spiderman funko
rat girl 🤡
then we went to a couple clothes stores and she got some clothes
travis 👾
did she look good lol
rat girl 🤡
UN FUCKING FORTUNATELY
rat girl 🤡
SHE KEPT TRYING THEM ON AND ASKING ME WHAT I THOUGHT
rat girl 🤡
I WAS GOING TO DIE
travis 👾
LMAOOOOO I CAN PICTURE THAT
rat girl 🤡
but after she was done giving me a heart attack 💀
rat girl 🤡
we stole shitty clothes from tj maxx
travis 👾
LMAO YOU DID WHAT
rat girl 🤡
NO APPARENTLY SHE DOES IT ALL THE TIME???
rat girl 🤡
I TOOK A NIRVANA TSHIRT AND SHE TOOK A SKIRT AND THEN WE JUST RAN
travis 👾
just like you to be into a criminal
rat girl 🤡
you know me so well
rat girl 🤡
and after shoplifting we bought a bunch of junk food snacks from this chinese grocery store
travis 👾
did you shoplift those too
rat girl 🤡
no we bought them this time
rat girl 🤡
then we went back to our hotel and ordered burgers for dinner and watched a shit ton of horror movies
travis 👾
did you do the pajama thing we talked about
rat girl 🤡
of course i did
travis 👾
good
rat girl 🤡
and then we ate the snacks from the store and started blasting music
rat girl 🤡
the people next door started yelling at us
rat girl 🤡
i think i probably fell asleep at like 1 am
travis 👾
but thats when you usually fall asleep anyway
rat girl 🤡
exactly
rat girl 🤡
anyway
rat girl 🤡
shes taking me to some kind of surprise shop today
travis 👾
what shop
rat girl 🤡
did you not hear me say its a SURPRISE
travis 👾
ohhhhhhhhh yeah
travis 👾
have fun
rat girl 🤡
have fun changing javis diapers
travis 👾
no 🧹
jackierabbit to ss.shipman
Saturday, September 25, 9:28 A.M.
jackie 🍓
so a lot just happened
SHAUNA ❤
You could say that again
jackie 🍓
tai and van are kinda a thing now
jackie 🍓
and nat and lottie are staying in new york together???
jackie 🍓
is everyone on our team gonna end up scissoring
SHAUNA ❤
Well not EVERYONE obviously
jackie 🍓
wdym obviously
SHAUNA ❤
Well you won’t
SHAUNA ❤
Because you like guys
jackie 🍓
oh yeah
jackie 🍓
right
SHAUNA ❤
You’re basically the only person on the team with a boyfriend though
SHAUNA ❤
I have no idea about the JV girls but still
jackie 🍓
they all seem pretty gay to me
SHAUNA ❤
Melissa does
SHAUNA ❤
I don’t know about the rest of them
jackie 🍓
i think maris bi or something tho
SHAUNA ❤
Really
jackie 🍓
yeah i remember her saying something like that to me once
jackie 🍓
but gen has an ace pin on her bag so she is doing NO scissoring lmao
SHAUNA ❤
Jackie how do you just notice all this
jackie 🍓
idk i just do 😭
SHAUNA ❤
Honestly that wouldn’t be the worst thing you’ve thought of so I’m fine with it
jackie 🍓
oh btw
jackie 🍓
hows everything with melissa
SHAUNA ❤
Melissa?
jackie 🍓
yeah?
jackie 🍓
have you talked to her much
SHAUNA ❤
Uh no not really
SHAUNA ❤
She’s mostly just been avoiding me really
jackie 🍓
thats weird
SHAUNA ❤
She’s probably just nervous or something
SHAUNA ❤
Why do you ask
jackie 🍓
oh just curious
jackie 🍓
sorry if its weird though
SHAUNA ❤
No it’s not weird
SHAUNA ❤
It’s just that we don’t really bring up Melissa at all
jackie 🍓
yeah well
jackie 🍓
she is on the team
jackie 🍓
and shes coming to my party
SHAUNA ❤
Ohhhh right
SHAUNA ❤
She’s going
jackie 🍓
you forgot she was going??
SHAUNA ❤
Yeah
SHAUNA ❤
It’s not like I need to remember
ss.shipman to nat_the_scat
Saturday, September 25, 9:32 A.M.
shauna 🌛
YOU FUCKING TOLD HER
⚹ natalie ⚹
shauna on all that is holy what are you talking about 😭
shauna 🌛
YOU TOLD JACKIE ABOUT MELISSA
⚹ natalie ⚹
no i didnt
shauna 🌛
YOU CLEARLY DID
shauna 🌛
BECAUSE SHE KNOWS
⚹ natalie ⚹
SHE DOES????
⚹ natalie ⚹
LIKE SHE TOLD YOU???
shauna 🌛
Well she didn’t straight out tell me
shauna 🌛
But she randomly brought up Melissa and if we were talking
shauna 🌛
Which she never does
⚹ natalie ⚹
okay yeah that is a little weird
shauna 🌛
And WHY else would she say that if she didn’t know
⚹ natalie ⚹
shauna i literally swear to you i did NOT tell her
⚹ natalie ⚹
ive like barely talked to jackie recently
shauna 🌛
Then who the hell told her
shauna 🌛
Who else knows
⚹ natalie ⚹
misty???
shauna 🌛
Oh my god it was probably her
shauna 🌛
Can you deal with her
⚹ natalie ⚹
absolutely not
shauna 🌛
NATALIE PLEASE
⚹ natalie ⚹
LOOK IM NOT DOING IT RIGHT NOW REGARDLESS
shauna 🌛
Why what are you doing
⚹ natalie ⚹
i honestly dont know
nat_the_scat to travmartinez
Saturday, September 25, 12:15 P.M.
nat 🚬
im gonna kill her
daddy issues #2
oh no what did she do
nat 🚬
i told you about that surprise shop
daddy issues #2
yes you did
nat 🚬
so first of all she shows up in the hotel room in this cute as fuck hippie flower dress
nat 🚬
and she buys me fucking BREAKFAST
daddy issues #2
oh my god oh my god
daddy issues #2
did she get you a blueberry muffin
nat 🚬
YEAH
daddy issues #2
what was her breakfast tho
daddy issues #2
this is crucial information
nat 🚬
a cinnamon bun and a matcha
daddy issues #2
ohhhhhhhh so shes a matcha person???
nat 🚬
yes she fucking is
daddy issues #2
thats going on the list
nat 🚬
so today she leads me around for a little while to this surprise thing
nat 🚬
and then she brings me to a fucking MUSIC STORE
daddy issues #2
OH MY GOD LIKE THE ONES IN MOVIES
daddy issues #2
LIKE THE ONES OUR BROKE ASS TOWN DOESNT HAVE
nat 🚬
YES WITH ALL MY FAVORITE VINYLS AND FUCKING GUITARS AND INSTRUMENTS AND EVERYTHING
daddy issues #2
MARRY HER
daddy issues #2
LIKE IM NOT EVEN JOKING
nat 🚬
WAIT WAIT WAIT IM NOT EVEN DONE
nat 🚬
she can fucking play guitar
daddy issues #2
jesus christ i bet that made you lose your mind
daddy issues #2
did she play it
nat 🚬
no bc she plays acoustic guitar and there were only electric guitars there
nat 🚬
but she told me and i felt like i was going to pass out
daddy issues #2
im going to pretend i know the difference between those guitars
nat 🚬
you heathen
daddy issues #2
:)
nat 🚬
and then she took me to get fucking sushi for lunch
nat 🚬
im having heart palpitations
daddy issues #2
because of the sushi
daddy issues #2
or because of the really hot rich girl buying you the sushi
nat 🚬
both????
daddy issues #2
you fucking idiot 💀
nat 🚬
but yeah mostly because of her
daddy issues #2
exactly
nat 🚬
but its so weird because i thought i hated her for the longest time
nat 🚬
and now were hanging out but were still arguing but its fun and its almost like were friends???
daddy issues #2
thats called flirting
nat 🚬
but its
nat 🚬
its different almost
daddy issues #2
wdym different
nat 🚬
oh my god
nat 🚬
travis
daddy issues #2
yeah????
daddy issues #2
are you okay
nat 🚬
i need to go to your house immediately once we get back
daddy issues #2
you got it
daddy issues #2
but like why
nat 🚬
because i think im in love with her
daddy issues #2
OH MY GOD YOU SAID IT
nat 🚬
oh my god im in love with her
nat 🚬
i feel so humiliated i need to die
daddy issues #2
WAIT NO NAT
ss.shipman to jackierabbit
Saturday, September 25, 12:19 P.M.
SHAUNA ❤
Anyway
SHAUNA ❤
Do you think the team’s going to be different once Tai and Van and Lottie and Nat are dating?
jackie 🍓
no i dont really think so???
jackie 🍓
i think despite the decrease in pining everything will be pretty normal
SHAUNA ❤
Lottie and Nat will probably still be bickering
jackie 🍓
oh absolutely
jackie 🍓
theyre already fighting like an old married couple anyway
SHAUNA ❤
But like on a less serious note
SHAUNA ❤
How does it feel being the only not gay girl on the team
jackie 🍓
i wouldnt know
SHAUNA ❤
What
jackie 🍓
huh
SHAUNA ❤
Why wouldn’t you know
jackie 🍓
oh uh
jackie 🍓
i just meant i wouldnt know about being the ONLY one
jackie 🍓
bc there are probably other straight girls on the team
SHAUNA ❤
Oh yeah
SHAUNA ❤
That makes sense
jackie 🍓
i mean we dont even know about misty
jackie 🍓
doesnt she have a thing for coach ben
SHAUNA ❤
Well I think she used to
SHAUNA ❤
But I’m pretty sure she kinda has a thing for Nat
SHAUNA ❤
Or at least she did
jackie 🍓
WAITTTTTT really
jackie 🍓
that actually makes a lot of sense
SHAUNA ❤
She seems a little less obsessed now though
SHAUNA ❤
I don’t know what happened but I can guess that something probably did
jackie 🍓
oooooooh shit gossip
SHAUNA ❤
I have no idea
SHAUNA ❤
But still yeah I think she likes girls
jackie 🍓
oh 😭
SHAUNA ❤
So yeah if you’re not the ONLY straight girl then you’re one of very few lol
jackie 🍓
not really
SHAUNA ❤
What
jackie 🍓
so im thinking about breaking up with jeff
SHAUNA ❤
Okay??
SHAUNA ❤
How is this related to this conversation
jackie 🍓
oh its not i just
jackie 🍓
wanted to tell you
SHAUNA ❤
Oh alright
SHAUNA ❤
Do you WANT to break up with him??
jackie 🍓
well kind of???
jackie 🍓
hes really sweet and nice but idk i feel like im not being
jackie 🍓
entirely fair to him if that makes sense????
SHAUNA ❤
What
SHAUNA ❤
What do you mean you haven’t been fair to him???
SHAUNA ❤
As far as I can tell you’ve been fine
jackie 🍓
yeah well
jackie 🍓
its a pretty long story
jackie 🍓
but really im not sure how he feels about it and if were going to work out
SHAUNA ❤
Well do you want to keep dating him???
SHAUNA ❤
Because if you do you shouldn’t just break up with him
jackie 🍓
yeah i mean im just not so sure
jackie 🍓
thats why im texting you abt this
jackie 🍓
idk what to do
SHAUNA ❤
Well Jackie I want to help but
SHAUNA ❤
I don’t want to TELL you what to do
jackie 🍓
oh
jackie 🍓
yeah that makes sense
SHAUNA ❤
Maybe I could come over and we could talk??
jackie 🍓
omg absolutely
SHAUNA ❤
Great
SHAUNA ❤
I’ll ask my mom to take me
jackie 🍓
ok sounds great!!
jackie 🍓
my parents basically just said yes
SHAUNA ❤
She said yes
vantheman to taiturner
Saturday, September 25, 12:25 P.M.
do you want to unblock taiturner?
yes no
van 😎
heyyyyyy
fine shyt <333333
WELL IT’S ABOUT TIME
Notes:
ok so my headcanons are coming in CLUTCH here. this one starbucks made a drink for every yellowjackets character after season 1 came out, and lottie was a matcha latte. that just gave me the idea that she was a matcha girl. the guitar thing is from that one bts pic of s1 courtney playing the acoustic guitar so don't blame me
tai not talking to van for THREE DAYS and going so insane that she has to publicly risk her honor and dignity by confessing her love in the PUBLIC GC shes so funny
(also yes jackieshauna are going a little feral but its FINEEEEE)
Chapter 8: nobody here is doing it like misty quigley
Summary:
lottie and nats nyc date comes to a close (and so does tai and vans crazy ass love drama, thank god). misty is officially the only person in the friend group to have an actual stress/drama-free love life. jackie is in the trenches of comphet with jeff and the mixed signals are making shauna turn into the joker
Notes:
had to delete and re post this chapter because the formatting at the beginning went CRAZY idk what happened
thanks to my dear friend kara's request, she got the taivan she wanted. everyone say thank you kara.
this chapter was almost entirely written while i listened to "forget her" by jeff buckley on repeat. do with that what you will.
WERE ALMOST AT 10 CHAPTERS (LIKE ALMOST HALFWAY THROUGH) HOLY SHYT
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
jackierabbit to ss.shipman
Sunday, September 26, 1:37 A.M.
jackie 🍓
whats the guest list so far
SHAUNA ❤
What
SHAUNA ❤
Jackie its so early
jackie 🍓
who needs sleep
SHAUNA ❤
You
SHAUNA ❤
Every night
SHAUNA ❤
Aren’t you always lecturing Nat about how healthy sleep is
jackie 🍓
shhhhhhhh
jackie 🍓
whos coming to my party
jackie 🍓
who do we know
SHAUNA ❤
Uh well you and me obviously
jackie 🍓
duh
SHAUNA ❤
Tai Van Lottie Nat Misty and Laura Lee
SHAUNA ❤
Also Mari Akilah Melissa and Gen
SHAUNA ❤
Nat invited Travis
SHAUNA ❤
And Jeff
jackie 🍓
jeff
SHAUNA ❤
Yeah I kinda
SHAUNA ❤
Invited him
jackie 🍓
you did
SHAUNA ❤
Yeah well I brought it up at school and he didn’t know about it so I said he could come
SHAUNA ❤
I mean you don’t mind right?
SHAUNA ❤
He is your boyfriend
jackie 🍓
oh yeah totally
jackie 🍓
i should probably talk to him about that at school tomorrow shouldn’t i
SHAUNA ❤
Well it probably wouldn’t hurt
SHAUNA ❤
Now we should both go to sleep
jackie 🍓
all right fine
jackie 🍓
but tomorrow were doing more planning
SHAUNA ❤
Do you just start planning social events whenever you get anxious??
jackie 🍓
i think i might
jackie 🍓
is that weird???
SHAUNA ❤
No it’s fine
SHAUNA ❤
I’ll help you set up the music
jackie 🍓
ok but you cant put mitski on the party playlist bc its a happy occasion
SHAUNA ❤
Are you kidding me???
jackie 🍓
dead serious
SHAUNA ❤
Ok fine then Misty doesn’t get to play her kpop shit
jackie 🍓
i think if i played kpop someone would jump me 😭
SHAUNA ❤
Exactly
SHAUNA ❤
Now GO TO SLEEP Jackie
jackie 🍓
okay fine
jackie 🍓
love u shauna MWAH
SHAUNA ❤
Love you too
fleetwoodlottie to “BUZZ BUZZ BUZZ 🐝”.
Sunday, September 26, 10:18 A.M.
lottie 🦌
tai and van
lottie 🦌
PLEASE tell me youre dating now
van 🔥
HEHEHEHEJEHSHEHE
jackie 🍓
OMG OMG?????
laura lee 😇
Oh really??
SHAUNA ❤
Thank FUCK
taissa ⚽
Yes, we are girlfriends now.
taissa ⚽
Van unblocked me last night and we were able to talk.
misty 🍄
Oh thats great to hear!!
misty 🍄
Especially after that whole show yesterday lol
nat 🚬
tai stop trying to be nonchalant ik ur giggling and kicking your feet
van 🔥
actually shes not but shes smiling like an idiot
jackie 🍓
huh????
SHAUNA ❤
And you know that how exactly
lottie 🦌
youre just staring right at her
van 🔥
well i cant not when im right next to her in her bed yk
nat 🚬
you are WHAT
taissa ⚽
VAN DON’T SAY IT LIKE THAT
jackie 🍓
OH MY GOD WHAT HAPPENED BEHIND THE SCENES
misty 🍄
Im not entirely sure i want to know
laura lee 😇
I’m not entirely sure I want to know either
taissa ⚽
IT’S NOT LIKE THAT
nat 🚬
aw man
nat 🚬
i thought you finally did it so van would shut up
van 🔥
dw itll happen eventually
jackie 🍓
VAN 😭
van 🔥
WHAT?????
lottie 🦌
IM WHEEZING 💀
nat 🚬
thats true she is
lottie 🦌
OH STFUUUUU
nat 🚬
you have the ugliest laugh ive ever heard
nat_the_scat to travmartinez
Sunday, September 26, 10:22 A.M.
nat 🚬
she has the cutest fucking laugh on the planet im gonna shoot myself
daddy issues #2
nat what the fuck 😭
jackierabbit to “BUZZ BUZZ BUZZ 🐝”.
Sunday, September 26, 10:22 A.M.
jackie 🍓
NAT STOP BULLYING HER
lottie 🦌
thank you jackie
nat 🚬
nuh uh
laura lee 😇
That’s wonderful to hear
laura lee 😇
I’m very happy for you two
van 🔥
awwwwwww thank you ll
van 🔥
i knew you were a g
SHAUNA ❤
Please never call someone a g ever again
jackie 🍓
NO BUT WHAT HAPPENED???
taissa ⚽
Well, Van unblocked me and we texted for a bit before I invited her to sleep over.
taissa ⚽
And then we were able to make our relationship official.
jackie 🍓
oh thank GOD
jackie 🍓
youre not those people who start dating over text
taissa ⚽
Of course we’re not!
SHAUNA ❤
Well you DID kinda confess over text soooooo
jackie 🍓
which was a little embarrassing no offense
lottie 🦌
yeah but it was funny as shit
nat 🚬
i hate agreeing with you
SHAUNA ❤
So now just me Misty and Laura Lee are single???
nat 🚬
what im single
lottie 🦌
yeah me too???
jackie 🍓
oop 💀
SHAUNA ❤
Oh right sorry
van 🔥
nah dont sweat it shauna i forgot abt them too
laura lee 😇
So did I in fact
lottie 🦌
literally what are you talking about
SHAUNA ❤
So me Misty Laura Lee AND Nat and Lottie are single
misty 🍄
Well actually…
jackie 🍓
OH????
misty 🍄
Im kinda talking to someone!!
SHAUNA ❤
You are
jackie 🍓
EEEEEEE OH MY GOD REALLY
lottie 🦌
I JUST SPIT OUT MY MATCHA
nat 🚬
AND YOU ALMOST GOT IT ALL OVER ME
nat 🚬
BUT MISTY FUCK YEAH
van 🔥
OH LETS FUCKING GET ITTTTT MISTY
laura lee 😇
How lovely Misty!!
taissa ⚽
Do we know them?
jackie 🍓
I CAN HELP YOU PLAN A DATE
misty 🍄
Nonono thats not necessary!!!
misty 🍄
We haven’t really gone on an official date yet
misty 🍄
But she’s really sweet and I like her a lot
jackie 🍓
her
jackie 🍓
she
SHAUNA ❤
Jackie what did I tell you
van 🔥
oh no shit welcome to the club
laura lee 😇
Either way I’m happy for you!!
taissa ⚽
Of course, we all are.
jackie 🍓
who is she??
misty 🍄
Oh well she used to be on the soccer team with you guys??
misty 🍄
Her names crystal
jackie 🍓
OHHHHHHH yeah i know her!!!
jackie 🍓
shes super sweet!!!
van 🔥
shes in theater now right???
SHAUNA ❤
Oh that all makes so much sense
lottie 🦌
of COURSE mistys dating a theater girl
nat 🚬
misty are you even in theater?
misty 🍄
No but i do want to join! :)
jackie 🍓
ohhhh im sure youd be great!!
misty 🍄
Awww thank you!!
laura lee 😇
You should ask her on a date Misty!
misty 🍄
Well i dont know what i would even ask!!
jackie 🍓
you should just ask and she if she says yes
jackie 🍓
do the planning later
taissa ⚽
As someone who is obsessed with planning, that sentence physically hurt me.
SHAUNA ❤
Same honestly
jackie 🍓
SHAUNA????
SHAUNA ❤
Jackie I love you but sometimes your brain is enemy territory
jackie 🍓
how dare you
misty 🍄
You know what i will ask her out!!
nat 🚬
hell yeah
lottie 🦌
yeah ik thats right
van 🔥
just whatever you do DONT take her to a cute cafe and buy her a banana bread because that will end in disaster
taissa ⚽
Van, can you not?
jackie 🍓
LMAO VANS PTSD KICKING IN
SHAUNA ❤
Honestly it’s all of our PTSD at this point
SHAUNA ❤
We’ve all had to watch these fucks for two years
nat 🚬
oh you can say that again sister
jackie 🍓
i mean shauna got it from tai and nat got it from van so you two have it the worst
jackie 🍓
lottie does too kinda because she got it from both at the same time
lottie 🦌
right you get it
taissa ⚽
Well, you’re all done with that now.
SHAUNA ❤
At long last
nat 🚬
HALLELUJAH
jackie 🍓
NAT PLZ 😭
nat 🚬
NO ITS MY SWEET SWEET FREEDOM
misty 🍄
Ok no cafes
misty 🍄
Got it!!
jackie 🍓
its gonna be awesome misty dw!!!
laura lee 😇
Yes I’m sure you’ll be successful!!
lottie 🦌
ok i think ur scaring her
SHAUNA ❤
Either way good luck
misty 🍄
Thank you all!
van 🔥
REPORT BACK
ss.shipman to jackierabbit
Sunday, September 26, 10:31 A.M.
SHAUNA ❤
I TOLD YOU MISTY WAS GAY
jackie 🍓
AND YOU WERE RIGHT
jackie 🍓
WHAT ELSE IS NEW
SHAUNA ❤
YOU COULDN’T FIGURE IT OUT THOUGH
jackie 🍓
WELL YOU WERE WRONG ABOUT HER LIKING NAT
SHAUNA ❤
I SAID SHE USED TO
jackie 🍓
no but like who wouldve guessed
SHAUNA ❤
What that Misty would get a girlfriend
jackie 🍓
well partly that
jackie 🍓
the other part is that the girlfriend is CRYSTAL
SHAUNA ❤
Yeah no never would’ve seen that coming
jackie 🍓
i didnt think they even knew each other existed???
jackie 🍓
but like if i think about it it makes sense
SHAUNA ❤
I guess????
SHAUNA ❤
Anyway after the party Laura Lee and I are probably gonna be the only single ones in that group chat
jackie 🍓
you think its gonna take lottie and nat that soon???
SHAUNA ❤
Well something’s gonna happen at that party I’m sure
jackie 🍓
no i think theyre just not gonna do anything until it gets insane and we have to intervene
SHAUNA ❤
They’re already at that point honestly 😭
SHAUNA ❤
But my point is that at some point I’m bound to be the only single one there
jackie 🍓
WHAT no you wont!!!
jackie 🍓
shauna a whole bunch of people like you!!
SHAUNA ❤
What like Melissa
jackie 🍓
well no obviously
jackie 🍓
but melissa is proof
SHAUNA ❤
That only losers like me
SHAUNA ❤
Like Melissa and Randy 💀
jackie 🍓
no not just losers
jackie 🍓
if i wasnt dating jeff i wouldve had a crush on you
SHAUNA ❤
If you weren’t dating Jeff
jackie 🍓
yeah
SHAUNA ❤
You mean if you liked girls
jackie 🍓
oh yeah i meant that
jackie 🍓
obviously
SHAUNA ❤
Right so
SHAUNA ❤
All I’m saying is that all the rest of you probably have a better chance when it comes to dating
SHAUNA ❤
I thought I’d get someone to date before Misty but clearly not 😭
jackie 🍓
tbh i think youll date someone before laura lee
jackie 🍓
like i love her but girl 💀
SHAUNA ❤
Remember how shocked we all were when she and Lottie started dating
jackie 🍓
NO I THOUGHT IT WAS A PRANK FOR LIKE A MONTH
SHAUNA ❤
I REMEMBER THAT
SHAUNA ❤
IT TOOK YOU LIKE A MONTH AND A HALF TO REALIZE THAT THEY WERE BEING SERIOUS
jackie 🍓
CAN YOU BLAME ME????
SHAUNA ❤
YES?????
jackie 🍓
what im trying to say is
jackie 🍓
if laura lee dating someone is so rare that it seems like a prank
jackie 🍓
youll find someone shauna i promise
jackie 🍓
whether its a boy or a girl
SHAUNA ❤
I really hope that’s true
jackie 🍓
it totally is
jackie 🍓
just trust me ik these things
SHAUNA ❤
Ok ok I trust you 😭
jackie 🍓
you should
jackie 🍓
btw im sorry for being all weird yesterday
SHAUNA ❤
You weren’t being weird!!
jackie 🍓
yeah ik i just feel bad for making a big deal out of nothing
SHAUNA ❤
Well whatever you’re feeling you should tell me
SHAUNA ❤
Whether there’s an actual problem with Jeff or not
jackie 🍓
ur probably right
SHAUNA ❤
Is there an actual problem with Jeff btw?
jackie 🍓
no i dont think so!!
jackie 🍓
but i do think im gonna talk to him tomorrow at school
jackie 🍓
i dont want us to just break up over something stupid yk???
SHAUNA ❤
Yeah I get it
ss.shipman to taiturner
Sunday, September 26, 10:40 A.M.
shauna 🌛
I NEED THEM TO BREAK UP I JUST REALLY REALLY DO
taissa ♔
What?
taissa ♔
Oh, you’re talking about Jackie and Jeff.
shauna 🌛
Yeah who fucking else would I want to break up
taissa ♔
I don’t know, me and Van?
shauna 🌛
No you and Van can’t break up
shauna 🌛
We’ve all worked too hard to make that happen
taissa ♔
All right, fine.
taissa ♔
What’s the problem?
shauna 🌛
She’s confusing me is the problem
shauna 🌛
She’s mad at Jeff and then she’s debating breaking up with him and then a DAY later she’s decided to try and date him for as long as possible
shauna 🌛
Does that not sound completely bipolar
taissa ♔
You’re both pretty bipolar.
shauna 🌛
Excuse me
taissa ♔
But other than that, yes, I see why that would be confusing.
taissa ♔
However, we both know how Jackie is.
taissa ♔
She’s a very spur-of-the-moment person, not like you or me at all.
shauna 🌛
Ok well yeah
taissa ♔
Almost everything she does is not premeditated, and everything is very sudden with no warning, so you can’t really expect her to NOT be like this.
taissa ♔
And even if it’s not about her being reckless, it’s probably about her frustrating need to be nice all the time.
shauna 🌛
No but why does she do that
shauna 🌛
I don’t understand
taissa ♔
I don’t either.
taissa ♔
But then again, neither of us are very nice, so we wouldn’t have a clue.
shauna 🌛
Yeah that’s fair
taissa ♔
Back on topic, Jackie might not know what she’s doing now, but when she does know what she’s doing, you should be there to help.
taissa ♔
You probably shouldn’t try and help her with whatever it is she’s doing, though.
shauna 🌛
Yeah I know that I’m not stupid
taissa ♔
That’s debatable.
shauna 🌛
Hello?????
taissa ♔
You heard me.
taissa ♔
If you weren’t, you’d be able to tell exactly what’s wrong with Jackie.
shauna 🌛
What are you talking about
shauna 🌛
Tai
shauna 🌛
Taissa Audrey Turner
shauna 🌛
What’s happening with her tell me
africangrey to “IT GIRLZZZZZZ 💅”:
Sunday, September 26, 10:48 A.M.
misty 💟
Mari!!
mari ✨
yuh
misty 💟
I just wanted to say thank you for giving me crystals info!!
mari ✨
oh no problem
melissa 🌈
you guys are friends now??
misty 💟
Well…
gen 🌀
tf u mean well
akilah 🍀
gen pls let her speak 😭
misty 💟
We’re technically a little more than friends at this point
melissa 🌈
OH MY GOD WHAT
misty 💟
I just asked her on a date and she said yes!!
mari ✨
OH MISTY LETS FUCKING GOOOOOOO
akilah 🍀
FFS IS EVERYONE IN THIS GC GAY
gen 🌀
I HAVE NO IDEA
misty 💟
Haha sure seems like it!!
mari ✨
AYYYY LETS GO SCISSOR SQUAD
melissa 🌈
AYYYYYYYYY
gen 🌀
ahem
akilah 🍀
how do you guys keep forgetting gens ace
misty 💟
Regardless
misty 💟
Just wanted to say thank you mari for kinda starting this!!
mari ✨
shipping people is one of my many talents
akilah 🍀
what talents 💀
gen 🌀
imagine MISTY getting a gf before yall
gen 🌀
no offense misty
misty 💟
None taken!
mari ✨
@melissa
melissa 🌈
MARI IBARRA
akilah 🍀
WHY ARE WE DOING THIS AGAIN
misty 💟
What?
akilah 🍀
theyve been doing this all week
gen 🌀
its funny as shit
akilah 🍀
DONT ENCOURAGE THEM
misty 💟
Doing what all week???
akilah 🍀
just watch
melissa 🌈
YOU HAVE NO RIGHT TO KEEP MAKING FUN OF ME FOR SHAUNA
mari ✨
YES I DO IT WAS STUPID AS HELL
misty 💟
Ohhhhhhh i see
gen 🌀
yep
melissa 🌈
IF YOU KEEP RUNNING YOUR MOUTH YOU WILL BE SIX FEET UNDER MARI
melissa 🌈
and i will NOT play cupcakke at your funeral
gen 🌀
OH DAMN
mari ✨
YOU WOULDNT DARE
melissa 🌈
YES I FUCKING WOULD
misty 💟
I can play cupcakke at your funeral mari
akilah 🍀
NO FUNERALS
mari ✨
THANK YOU MISTY
mari ✨
melissa take notes
melissa 🌈
nuh uh
travmartinez to nat_the_scat
Sunday, September 26, 11:02
daddy issues #2
so hows the last day of new york going
nat 🚬
its kinda over
nat 🚬
were getting on the train now
daddy issues #2
awwwww man
nat 🚬
im kinda thankful
nat 🚬
i need to get home and crash at your house before i explode
daddy issues #2
oh god
daddy issues #2
was the night that bad
nat 🚬
i dont think i slept at all
nat 🚬
i mean we got takeout again and watched movies like we did last night
nat 🚬
but i just felt like i was gonna die
daddy issues #2
well you said that yesterday
daddy issues #2
and here you are
nat 🚬
unfortunately
nat 🚬
shes next to me on the train with her fucking matcha and she looks great and she smells good and shes listening to fucking fleetwood mac with me
nat 🚬
i wanna punch her
daddy issues #2
i thought you wanted to make out with her
nat 🚬
i wanna do that too
nat 🚬
WHAT AM I GONNA DO
daddy issues #2
NOT DIE
daddy issues #2
i dont even know who this girl is
nat 🚬
and if im lucky you never will
daddy issues #2
you little asscrack
nat 🚬
look i havent told you for a reason
daddy issues #2
too late
daddy issues #2
i WILL find out
daddy issues #2
you cant hide from me natalie scatorccio
nat 🚬
well im still gonna try
nat_the_scat to fleetwoodlottie
Sunday, September 26, 11:08
LOVE OF MY LIFE????? 💝💞💖💘
hey so ik we like just got away from each other but
lottie 🦌
oh trust me i dont mind
LOVE OF MY LIFE????? 💝💞💖💘
yeah well i just wanted to say thank you lottie
LOVE OF MY LIFE????? 💝💞💖💘
for taking me to new york and basically everything
LOVE OF MY LIFE????? 💝💞💖💘
it was awesome
lottie 🦌
oh of course!!
lottie 🦌
i knew you would like it and i just really wanted you to be able to go
lottie 🦌
i had a lot of fun hanging out with you this weekend
LOVE OF MY LIFE????? 💝💞💖💘
yeah me too
LOVE OF MY LIFE????? 💝💞💖💘
i mean
LOVE OF MY LIFE????? 💝💞💖💘
it was good
lottie 🦌
yeah
LOVE OF MY LIFE????? 💝💞💖💘
anyway thats what i wanted to say
LOVE OF MY LIFE????? 💝💞💖💘
just thank you for bringing me
lottie 🦌
of course
lottie 🦌
anytime
LOVE OF MY LIFE????? 💝💞💖💘
ok well
LOVE OF MY LIFE????? 💝💞💖💘
see you tomorrow lottie
lottie 🦌
see you tomorrow nat
ss.shipman to jackierabbit
Sunday, September 26, 11:25 A.M.
SHAUNA ❤
Hey so
jackie 🍓
yeah?
SHAUNA ❤
Is something going on??
SHAUNA ❤
With you I mean
jackie 🍓
no of course not???
jackie 🍓
why would something be going on
SHAUNA ❤
Oh nothing
SHAUNA ❤
It’s just that Taissa said something about “not knowing what’s ACTUALLY going on with you”
SHAUNA ❤
And I had no idea what she meant
jackie 🍓
taissa said that
SHAUNA ❤
Yeah
SHAUNA ❤
Do you know what she meant
jackie 🍓
oh jesus
jackie 🍓
dont pay attention to taissa shauna
SHAUNA ❤
What?
jackie 🍓
we both know shes cryptic as shit for no reason
jackie 🍓
shes probably just saying random stuff to get you to freak out
SHAUNA ❤
If you say so
SHAUNA ❤
I just have no idea where she got that from
jackie 🍓
she probably THINKS somethings going on but nothing is
jackie 🍓
she obviously cant accept when shes wrong so its probably something like that
SHAUNA ❤
Yeah that does make sense actually
jackie 🍓
theres no reason to worry shauna im sorry you got nervous
jackie 🍓
im not having any problems its all okay
SHAUNA ❤
Ok but Jackie?
jackie 🍓
yeah???
SHAUNA ❤
If something was going on
SHAUNA ❤
You would tell me right
jackie 🍓
of course i would
jackie 🍓
if there was ever a problem you would be the FIRST person i would tell shauna
SHAUNA ❤
That’s good I guess
SHAUNA ❤
I just wanted to check because I had no idea what Tai was saying
jackie 🍓
tais full of shit
jackie 🍓
like I dont even know what she was talking about
SHAUNA ❤
She also called me stupid but that was probably just a joke
jackie 🍓
yeah because youre smart as shit
jackie 🍓
i mean tai is too so she should know
SHAUNA ❤
Thank you Jackie
jackie 🍓
oh no problem!!!
jackie 🍓
wait for what
SHAUNA ❤
For everything really
SHAUNA ❤
You’re nicer to me than everyone else
jackie 🍓
oh well of course i am
jackie 🍓
youre my best friend in the whole world
jackie 🍓
i think ill never be able to NOT be nice to you
SHAUNA ❤
See what I mean
SHAUNA ❤
You’re literally the sweetest
jackie 🍓
yeah well being nice to people is pretty easy
jackie 🍓
try it sometime on someone other than me
SHAUNA ❤
Oh my GOD shut up
jackie 🍓
LMAOOOO NO
SHAUNA ❤
And by the way Jackie
SHAUNA ❤
You’re my best friend in the whole world too
jackie 🍓
awwwww thanks shauna
jackie 🍓
love u <3333
SHAUNA ❤
I love you too
Notes:
YAYAY TAIVAN ARE FINALLY TOGETHER!! we can move away from THAT end of our stupid lesbian love web now
lets give travis a round of applause for the amount of nats shit he goes through daily
also yay misty!! shes finally got a gf and i'm very happy because at least i was able to avoid miscommunication THIS time around
Chapter 9: call jackie a dj because shes very good at mixing signals
Summary:
nats secret is out!!! jackie is dead set on doing jeff one good thing before she fatally breaks up with him and as a result she puts shauna in like a psychotic episode. with travis and jackie's help, lottienat are able to have another date and chaos. will. ensue. shauna is spiraling and shes making evil little plans for jackiejeff's downfall
Notes:
one more chapter until we're halfway done!! ...I think. I'm not entirely sure how long I want this story to be, but I think it's safe to say that my goal is around twenty to twenty one chapters--so we're technically halfway there!
(btw lottienat IS going to happen before jackieshauna, I'll tell you that much)
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
travmartinez to nat_the_scat
Monday, September 27, 3:28 P.M.
daddy issues #2
so nat
nat 🚬
uh yeah
daddy issues #2
guess what happened at school today
nat 🚬
uhhhhhhh someone called you flex again
daddy issues #2
well yes but beyond that
nat 🚬
idk tell me
daddy issues #2
we had to do groupwork in english
nat 🚬
oh GOD no 😭
nat 🚬
groupwork sucks so ass
nat 🚬
did you get paired up with some asshole
daddy issues #2
no actually
nat 🚬
oh really
nat 🚬
who was it then
daddy issues #2
lottie matthews
nat 🚬
oh
nat 🚬
really
daddy issues #2
yeah
daddy issues #2
you know her right
nat 🚬
i mean yeah were both on the soccer team
daddy issues #2
so anyway
daddy issues #2
you know what i realized
nat 🚬
uh no what did you realize
daddy issues #2
lotties tall
daddy issues #2
and rich
daddy issues #2
and pretty
daddy issues #2
when i talked to her she was drinking a matcha and listening to fleetwood mac on her chromebook
nat 🚬
oh
nat 🚬
thats funny
daddy issues #2
and you know what else
daddy issues #2
she just got back from a weekend to new york
nat 🚬
okay
daddy issues #2
uh huh
nat 🚬
im caught arent i
daddy issues #2
you are so caught
nat 🚬
well shit
daddy issues #2
no but like seriously natalie
daddy issues #2
lottie matthews
daddy issues #2
THATS the girl youve been into this whole time
nat 🚬
ITS EMBARRASSING I KNOW OKAY
daddy issues #2
ITS NOT JUST EMBARRASSING ITS LIKE
daddy issues #2
THE REALLY REALLY RICH GIRL????
nat 🚬
YES THE REALLY REALLY RICH GIRL
daddy issues #2
THE ONE WITH THE HAIR
nat 🚬
THE ONE WITH THE HAIR!!!!!
daddy issues #2
HER of all people 😭
nat 🚬
LOOK I KNOW ITS A DISASTER
nat 🚬
THATS WHY I NEED YOUR MASCULINE INSTINCT
daddy issues #2
nat you can NOTTTTT bag her
daddy issues #2
shes like
daddy issues #2
a princess
daddy issues #2
and youre a bleached blonde goth with no money
nat 🚬
I KNOWWWWW AHUFISJFIKHG
nat 🚬
I JUST
nat 🚬
HOW DO YOU GET A GIRLFRIEND
daddy issues #2
uhhhhhh
daddy issues #2
pin her against a tree and tell her you wanna make out w her
nat 🚬
TRAVIS MARTINEZ.
daddy issues #2
WHAT?????
daddy issues #2
ITS WORKED BEFORE
nat 🚬
JUST BECAUSE IT WORKED ON ME DOES NOTTTT MEAN ITLL WORK ON LOTTIE
nat 🚬
SHE IS A BEAUTIFUL ANGEL AND I AM A RACCOON
nat 🚬
WE DO NOT HAVE THE SAME STANDARDS
daddy issues #2
ykw maybe you should have this conversation with someone who isnt your ex boyfriend
nat 🚬
NO TRAV PLS
nat 🚬
YOURE THE CLOSEST FRIEND IVE GOT
daddy issues #2
ok so
daddy issues #2
do you wanna come over tomorrow
nat 🚬
can we raid your dads liquour cabinet again
daddy issues #2
yes natalie
nat 🚬
youre a lifesaver
nat 🚬
ill be there
jackierabbit to “girlkissers official gc”:
Monday, September 27, 3:31 P.M.
jackie 🍓
sooooooo
jackie 🍓
im doing matching costumes with jeff
lottie 🦌
oh hell naw
van 🔥
sorry you are doing WHAT with jeff
taissa ⚽
Jackie, we talked about this.
jackie 🍓
I KNOW I KNOW IM SORRY
lottie 🦌
NONONONO dont be sorry
taissa ⚽
We’re not mad at you or anything.
lottie 🦌
exactly its just
van 🔥
YOU SAID YOU WOULD BREAK UP WITH HIM
jackie 🍓
I WILL
jackie 🍓
JUST NOT YET
van 🔥
THEN WHEN?????
jackie 🍓
AfTER THE PARTY
lottie 🦌
ffs jackie 😭
taissa ⚽
What do you even mean by “matching costumes”?
jackie 🍓
well my costume is karen from mean girls
jackie 🍓
like when she dressed up as that mouse
lottie 🦌
what so jeff is regina
van 🔥
STOP IM LAUGHING
jackie 🍓
no actually jeff is aaron
lottie 🦌
what
van 🔥
isnt aaron dating regina
jackie 🍓
I KNOW BUT I DIDNT WANT TO CHANGE MY COSTUME
jackie 🍓
AND I FELT BAD ABOUT AVOIDING HIM SO I CAME UP WITH SOME MEAN GIRLS COSTUME IDEA
taissa ⚽
Jackie, that’s really sweet, but that’s a completely stupid idea.
van 🔥
i have never agreed more 💀
jackie 🍓
i was trying to be nice
lottie 🦌
jackie you dont have to be nice all the time
jackie 🍓
yes i do
taissa ⚽
No, you really don’t.
van 🔥
yeah exactly tai would know
jackie 🍓
look i just feel really bad for being such an asshole to him recently
jackie 🍓
and if im going to break up with him i want to do something nice with him first
lottie 🦌
jackie youre way too sweet
taissa ⚽
Okay, as long as you know what you’re doing.
jackie 🍓
i do
jackie 🍓
i think
van 🔥
have you told shauna
jackie 🍓
uh no not yet
lottie 🦌
oh god
taissa ⚽
Well, you should go do that.
jackie 🍓
ok bye i guess
africangrey to jackierabbit
Monday, September 27, 3:27 P.M.
misty 🍄
Hey jackie?
jackie 🍓
yeah whats up??
misty 🍄
I was wondering…
misty 🍄
Can crystal come to your party next week?
jackie 🍓
oh of course!!
jackie 🍓
it would be great if she came!!
misty 🍄
Okay great!!
misty 🍄
Ill tell her
jackie 🍓
btw have you decided on a costume yet?
misty 🍄
Oh well we talked about matching at school today!!
jackie 🍓
aww really??
jackie 🍓
thats so cute!
misty 🍄
We were saying that i could be glinda and she could be elphaba from wicked
jackie 🍓
ohhhhh you guys would look so cute!!
misty 🍄
Thank you!
misty 🍄
Ill go tell her now
jackie 🍓
ok sounds good
africangrey to crystalz_curtain_call
Monday, September 27, 3:29 P.M.
misty 💟
Jackie said yes to the party!!!
crystal!! 💖
Oh YAYYYYY!!!
misty 💟
You sure you still wanna be elphaba and glinda??
crystal!! 💖
Mhm!
crystal!! 💖
Were gonna look so cool!!
misty 💟
EEEEE I cant wait!!
jackierabbit to ss.shipman
Monday, September 27, 3:32 P.M.
jackie 🍓
so i talked to jeff
SHAUNA ❤
Oh great
SHAUNA ❤
How did it go
jackie 🍓
it went pretty good i think
jackie 🍓
were gonna match costumes to my party
SHAUNA ❤
Oh
SHAUNA ❤
So better than good I’d say
jackie 🍓
you think so
SHAUNA ❤
Well I mean yeah
SHAUNA ❤
Considering that you were having relationship problems less than a week ago
jackie 🍓
we were having relationship problems
SHAUNA ❤
Weren’t you
SHAUNA ❤
Like arguing and not being sure if you even liked him
jackie 🍓
those are relationship problems
SHAUNA ❤
They sound like relationship problems
jackie 🍓
oh
SHAUNA ❤
But everything’s okay now
jackie 🍓
pretty much yeah
jackie 🍓
i feel guilty for being a bad girlfriend and avoiding him
jackie 🍓
and since hes going to this party i just want it to be fun
SHAUNA ❤
Jackie you’ve been bending over backwards to make sure this party is fun
SHAUNA ❤
You can relax
jackie 🍓
i know
jackie 🍓
i just think he deserves this right???
SHAUNA ❤
Yeah I guess
jackie 🍓
plus were gonna look cute
jackie 🍓
and this is a normal couple thing anyway
SHAUNA ❤
Yeah I totally get it
jackie 🍓
UGH thank you
jackie 🍓
tai van and lottie were being so weird about this
jackie 🍓
but i knew youd get it
SHAUNA ❤
Of course
ss.shipman to taiturner
Monday, September 27, 3:34 P.M.
shauna 🌛
I HAVE BEEN TRYING SO HARD TO BREAK THEM UP AND NOTHING IS WORKING
taissa ♔
So why don’t you just stop trying??
shauna 🌛
You can’t be serious
taissa ♔
Sorry, you’re talking about Jackie and Jeff right?
shauna 🌛
For the thousandth time who else would I be talking about
taissa ♔
Just checking.
shauna 🌛
No but Tai I can’t just STOP
shauna 🌛
You know that when I get desperate about something I can’t possibly just give up
taissa ♔
Yeah, and it usually ends up leading to your downfall.
shauna 🌛
That’s irrelevant
shauna 🌛
But I NEED this to happen you don’t get it
taissa ♔
Well, help me get it.
taissa ♔
Why do you need them to break up so badly?
shauna 🌛
Because being in love with a girl with a boyfriend feels guilty
shauna 🌛
Like borderline illegal
shauna 🌛
It makes me feel demonic or something
taissa ♔
And plotting the downfall of a relationship DOESN’T make you guilty?
shauna 🌛
Look even if I don’t have a chance with Jackie even when she’s single
shauna 🌛
I need to be able to breathe
shauna 🌛
I’m having a crisis
taissa ♔
For fuck’s sake, everyone’s having a crisis.
shauna 🌛
I don’t realistically think I’m getting over her anytime soon
shauna 🌛
And I can TELL she doesn’t like Jeff that’s what’s so infuriating
taissa ♔
Why is it infuriating?
shauna 🌛
She won’t stop trying to fix everything because she’s so desperate to be NICE all the time
taissa ♔
That sounds like Jackie, yeah.
shauna 🌛
And she’s making herself miserable by trapping herself in a relationship with a guy she doesn’t even like out of obligation
shauna 🌛
And she’s making ME miserable because I feel bad watching her put herself into this situation
shauna 🌛
But I’m also in love with her so I physically cannot breathe when I see them together and it’s all for NOTHING
shauna 🌛
SHE’S MAKING US BOTH MISERABLE WITHOUT REALIZING IT
taissa ♔
And Jeff.
shauna 🌛
What
taissa ♔
Isn’t she making Jeff miserable too?
taissa ♔
By dishonestly leading him on to believe she likes him, when she doesn’t?
shauna 🌛
Well I really don’t give a fuck about Jeff
shauna 🌛
But SEE?
shauna 🌛
By breaking them up I’d technically be doing a good thing
taissa ♔
I think you’re trying to gaslight yourself.
taissa ♔
But yes, I see your point.
shauna 🌛
I’m not doing anything bad I’m trying to have freedom
taissa ♔
Freedom?
shauna 🌛
They’ll be free from this relationship and I’m be free to yearn without feeling like Satan is repeatedly backstabbing me
taissa ♔
You’re Jewish.
shauna 🌛
TAISSA PLEASE
ss.shipman to jackierabbit
Monday, September 27, 3:39 P.M.
SHAUNA ❤
Anyway I’m happy you guys have sorted things out
jackie 🍓
oh yeah me too!!!
SHAUNA ❤
So what costumes are you guys going to wear
jackie 🍓
well i already told you about mine
SHAUNA ❤
Karen Smith as a mouse
jackie 🍓
exactly
jackie 🍓
so jeff is gonna be aaron
SHAUNA ❤
That would make sense if you were Regina
jackie 🍓
yes its stupid 😭
jackie 🍓
but i wanted to include him
SHAUNA ❤
No it’s not stupid
SHAUNA ❤
I think it’s kind of you
jackie 🍓
awwww thank you
SHAUNA ❤
But you know you don’t have to do this if you don’t want to
jackie 🍓
what do you mean
SHAUNA ❤
Like I know you say everything’s fine with Jeff
SHAUNA ❤
But you’ve been telling me about a lot of problems or things you’re unsure of
SHAUNA ❤
So if there is something then I hope you can tell me
jackie 🍓
shauna yk i tell you everything
jackie 🍓
im not entirely sure whats going on with me but what i do know is that jeff doesnt deserve all my crazy mood swings
SHAUNA ❤
Mood swings
jackie 🍓
yeah ive been acting kinda weird lately
jackie 🍓
dont know whats going on
SHAUNA ❤
I’m sure Jeff is okay
SHAUNA ❤
You guys have been dating for like forever
jackie 🍓
yeah ik
jackie 🍓
but he is like one of the only tolerable boys in our town so
jackie 🍓
he doesnt really deserve to be treated like dirt???
SHAUNA ❤
Yeah I guess you’re right
ss.shipman to nat_the_scat
Monday, September 27, 3:43 P.M.
shauna 🌛
JEFF SADECKI IS AN UGLY LITTLE PIECE OF DIRT AND I NEED HIM GONE
⚹ natalie ⚹
no what you really need is some psych meds
nat_the_scat to fleetwoodlottie
Monday, September 27, 3:44 P.M.
nat 🚬
shaunas crashing out
spawn from hell (loml 💕)
again
spawn from hell (loml 💕)
isnt she always crashing out
nat 🚬
no but this time its bad
nat 🚬
i think shes gonna like become the joker or smth
spawn from hell (loml 💕)
her contact name in my phone is bisexual stalin 💀
nat 🚬
HELP I LOVE THAT
spawn from hell (loml 💕)
I DID THAT DURING OUR SOVIET UNION HISTORY UNIT
nat 🚬
WHAT???
nat 🚬
THAT WAS LIKE FOUR MONTHS AGO
spawn from hell (loml 💕)
YEAH???
nat 🚬
YOU ALREADY KNEW SHE WAS BI BY THEN???
spawn from hell (loml 💕)
i have a really good gaydar
nat 🚬
and thats why you automatically clocked jackie
spawn from hell (loml 💕)
i think all of us automatically clocked jackie
nat 🚬
alr fair enough
spawn from hell (loml 💕)
i knew jackie was a lesbian before i knew I was a lesbian 😭
nat 🚬
wait how did you figure out you were a lesbian
spawn from hell (loml 💕)
yk the regular
spawn from hell (loml 💕)
gay awakening
nat 🚬
ohhhh like fictional crush??
spawn from hell (loml 💕)
well i just had a crush on this girl
spawn from hell (loml 💕)
that was kinda a giveaway
nat 🚬
who was the girl
spawn from hell (loml 💕)
well i was pretty sure she was straight at first
spawn from hell (loml 💕)
like she had a boyfriend
spawn from hell (loml 💕)
but it turns out shes not straight so
spawn from hell (loml 💕)
i used to hate the boyfriend but i talked to him for a group project and hes actually not too bad
nat 🚬
OHHHHHHH it was laura lee right
nat 🚬
she used to have some boyfriends
nat 🚬
if you could count those as boyfriends
spawn from hell (loml 💕)
oh yeah
spawn from hell (loml 💕)
laura lee
spawn from hell (loml 💕)
it was her
nat 🚬
I KNEW IT
nat 🚬
damn im so awesome
spawn from hell (loml 💕)
lmao yeah
nat 🚬
wow i didnt expect you to just agree that fast
spawn from hell (loml 💕)
well its true
spawn from hell (loml 💕)
youre pretty amazing
nat 🚬
oh
nat 🚬
thanks
spawn from hell (loml 💕)
btw did you do the trig homework
nat 🚬
HELL NO 😭
nat 🚬
i dont get this lesson at all
spawn from hell (loml 💕)
wanna call
spawn from hell (loml 💕)
we can do it together
nat 🚬
oh my dad wont let me call
spawn from hell (loml 💕)
awww why not
nat 🚬
because hes an asshole
spawn from hell (loml 💕)
twin 😛
nat 🚬
LMAOOO REALLY??
spawn from hell (loml 💕)
YES????
spawn from hell (loml 💕)
MY DAD DOESNT EVEN LIKE ME
spawn from hell (loml 💕)
HE ACTS LIKE I DONT EXIST
nat 🚬
MY DAD IGNORES ME MOST OF THE TIME
nat 🚬
AND WHEN HES NOT IGNORING ME HES YELLING AT ME
spawn from hell (loml 💕)
MINE GETS MAD AT ME FOR EXISTING
nat 🚬
TWINNNNN
spawn from hell (loml 💕)
NOT US BONDING OVER SHITTY DADS
nat 🚬
WHO WOULD HAVE THOUGHT
spawn from hell (loml 💕)
so if you cant call
spawn from hell (loml 💕)
would you maybe wanna come over??
spawn from hell (loml 💕)
maybe stay for dinner if your parents would be okay with it
nat 🚬
theyd be okay with it
spawn from hell (loml 💕)
so you wanna come over??
nat 🚬
sure
nat 🚬
i mean why not
spawn from hell (loml 💕)
ok great
spawn from hell (loml 💕)
ill send you the address
nat_the_scat to travmartinez
Monday, September 27, 3:51 P.M.
rat girl 🤡
MOTHERFUCK
rat girl 🤡
HELP
travis 👾
oh lord not again
rat girl 🤡
(insert screenshot)
rat girl 🤡
(insert screenshot)
rat girl 🤡
HELP ME
travis 👾
is that seriously her contact name
travis 👾
is that a HEART???
rat girl 🤡
UNRELATED
rat girl 🤡
DID YOU READ THE TEXTS
travis 👾
UH HUH???
rat girl 🤡
WHAT DO I DO
travis 👾
GO TO HER HOUSE
travis 👾
ARE YOU SLOW
rat girl 🤡
I CANT
travis 👾
YES YOU CAN
travis 👾
GET OUT THAT DOOR
rat girl 🤡
I LOOK LIKE SHIT
rat girl 🤡
IM DRESSED LIKE A HOMELESS PERSON
travis 👾
put on some jeans and lip gloss and put your hair in a bun and youll look fine
rat girl 🤡
what the fuck
rat girl 🤡
how do you know that
travis 👾
i just do
travis 👾
ive spent enough time with you to know
rat girl 🤡
ok fine
travis 👾
NOW GO
rat girl 🤡
WAIT
travis 👾
ugh WHATTTT
rat girl 🤡
there was one other thing
rat girl 🤡
she was talking about the girl who made her realize she was gay
rat girl 🤡
and my heart broke
travis 👾
yes 👀
rat girl 🤡
you drama whore
travis 👾
youre gonna show me anyway
rat girl 🤡
yes i am
rat girl 🤡
(insert screenshot)
rat girl 🤡
(insert screenshot)
travis 👾
you IDIOT
rat girl 🤡
WHAT???
travis 👾
SHE WAS TALKING ABOUT YOU
rat girl 🤡
NUH UH
travis 👾
YUH HUH
rat girl 🤡
NUH UH TIMES INFINITY
travis 👾
YUH HUH TIMES INFINITY
rat girl 🤡
YEAH WELL YOU HAVE DADDY ISSUES
travis 👾
YOU HAVE DADDY ISSUES DONT PLAY
rat girl 🤡
lottie has daddy issues too
travis 👾
oh my GOD you want her so bad
rat girl 🤡
SHUT UP
rat girl 🤡
and besides she literally said she was talking about laura lee
travis 👾
there is NO WAY she was talking about laura lee
rat girl 🤡
you know laura lee
travis 👾
yeah shes in my art class
travis 👾
and look shes nice and all but she is NOTTTTTTT gay awakening material
travis 👾
you know who is tho
rat girl 🤡
lottie
travis 👾
you
rat girl 🤡
BOYYYYY
rat girl 🤡
BE QUIET
travis 👾
OH MY GOD SHE LIKES BLONDES
travis 👾
YOU AND LAURA LEE
travis 👾
SHE LIKES BLONDES NAT!!!!
rat girl 🤡
WHICH COULD MEAN NOTHING
travis 👾
shhhhh
rat girl 🤡
how do you even know shes talking about me for sure
travis 👾
NAT THE EX BOYFRIEND????
travis 👾
THE EX BOYFRIEND
rat girl 🤡
LAURA LEE HAD BOYFRIENDS
travis 👾
yeah but IM the only ex boyfriend shes in a group project with
rat girl 🤡
i need you to stop talking
travis 👾
nat she wants you
rat girl 🤡
im not getting my hopes up
travis 👾
your hopes were never there to begin with
rat girl 🤡
i hate how you know me so well
travis 👾
mwah 😘
fleetwoodlottie to jackierabbit
Monday, September 27, 4:01
lottie 🦌
JACKIEEEEE
comphet final boss 👩❤💋👩
LOTTIEEEEE
lottie 🦌
I NEED HELP QUICK
comphet final boss 👩❤💋👩
OF COURSE
comphet final boss 👩❤💋👩
WHAT DO YOU NEED HELP WITH
lottie 🦌
(insert screenshot)
lottie 🦌
I FUCKED UP
comphet final boss 👩❤💋👩
DAMN LOTTIE????
comphet final boss 👩❤💋👩
THAT WAS SMOOTH
lottie 🦌
I LOOK AWFUL WHAT DO I DO
comphet final boss 👩❤💋👩
lottie girly you never look awful
lottie 🦌
JUST HELP ME PLEASE
lottie 🦌
SHE IS COMING OVER TO MY HOUSE WHO KNOWS HOW SOON
lottie 🦌
SHE IS GOING TO EAT DINNER IN MY HOUSE IM HYPERVENTILATING
comphet final boss 👩❤💋👩
OK OK
comphet final boss 👩❤💋👩
put on some mascara
comphet final boss 👩❤💋👩
and that cute bow barrette you wore on shaunas birthday
comphet final boss 👩❤💋👩
and wear that taylor swift cardigan i got you for christmas
lottie 🦌
THANK YOU SO MUCH
lottie 🦌
I LOVE YOU
comphet final boss 👩❤💋👩
HEHEHEHEEHEHEH GLAD TO BE HELPFUL
comphet final boss 👩❤💋👩
GO GET HER
lottie 🦌
PRAY FOR ME PLEASE
comphet final boss 👩❤💋👩
MAY THE LESBIAN GODDESSES BE ON YOUR SIDE
comphet final boss 👩❤💋👩
NOW GO KISS GIRLS
ss.shipman to jesuslovesyou
Monday, September 27, 4:10 P.M.
shauna 🌛
Hey Laura Lee?
laura lee ♱
Yes Shauna?
shauna 🌛
I need a favor
shauna 🌛
It’s about Jackie’s party next week
laura lee ♱
Yes what do you need help with?
shauna 🌛
I have a plan to break up Jackie and Jeff
shauna 🌛
And I need your help to do it
Notes:
TRAVIS FINDING OUT ABOUT LOTTIE I LOVE HIM. and the way nat was so gobsmacked when she realized he knew
LOTTIENAT STUDY DATE I LOVE THEM SO MUCHHHHHHH AAAAAAA
jackie being so nice that shes absolutely desecrating everything around her because she REFUSES to set boundaries. MY SHAYLA GOD SHE NEEDS THERAPY (and a girlfriend)
WHAT does shauna need laura lees help for. WHAT IS SHE GONNA DO OH GAWD
Chapter 10: signs of the apocalypse (nat scatorccios edition)
Summary:
a collection of little conversations leading up to the party. nat is having a total personality revamp (gee I wonder why) and shes making travis and van lowkey question their sanity. shauna's (and laura lees) plan is not as secret as she thought surprise surprise, and jackie's having like seven mental breakdowns for it. also MARIKILAH!!
Notes:
guys I KNOW shauna's acting kinda awful atm but TRUST ME its for a good cause. shes suffering here
also no tai in this chap...I just don't think shes the typa girly to text in school I'm sorry
were at the point where everyone's having a crisis. this is fun
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
jackierabbit to nat_the_scat
Tuesday, September 28, 9:09 A.M.
jackie 🍓
hey nat
jackie 🍓
nat
jackie 🍓
nattttttttttt
jackie 🍓
natalieeeee
nat 🚬
what do you want
jackie 🍓
whats going on with shauna
nat 🚬
bro what
nat 🚬
what do you mean with shauna
nat 🚬
nothings going on with her
jackie 🍓
yes there is
jackie 🍓
shes been acting weirdly shady and shes always whispering about something with laura lee but she refuses to tell me
nat 🚬
ok so i have no idea what thats all about
nat 🚬
why are you even asking me
jackie 🍓
havent you guys been talking
jackie 🍓
like texting
nat 🚬
what
nat 🚬
how do you even know that
jackie 🍓
misty told me
nat 🚬
fucking quigley
jackie 🍓
yeah i say that a lot too
nat 🚬
i honest to god don’t know what’s up with shauna okay
jackie 🍓
you sure
nat 🚬
positive
nat 🚬
i have no idea what shes doing with laura lee i swear on my arctic monkeys vinyl
jackie 🍓
okay fine
nat_the_scat to ss.shipman
Tuesday, September 28, 9:13 A.M.
nat 🚬
what in the everloving fuckity fuck do you see in jackie
thing 2 (shauna)
Excuse me????
nat 🚬
you heard me
nat 🚬
answer the question
thing 2 (shauna)
She’s hot?
nat 🚬
oh sweet baby jesus
nat 🚬
other than that you cuck
thing 2 (shauna)
She's funny
thing 2 (shauna)
A little
thing 2 (shauna)
She’s super duper sweet and really stupid but she’s cute about it
thing 2 (shauna)
And she’s been my best friend for forever
nat 🚬
ok so i actually didnt want an answer
thing 2 (shauna)
What
thing 2 (shauna)
Why did you ask
nat 🚬
idk i wanted to troll you
nat 🚬
i didnt think you would actually say smth
thing 2 (shauna)
Well you made me feel like I had to make a point
nat 🚬
yeah sometimes i forget how much love you have for arguing
thing 2 (shauna)
Another example
thing 2 (shauna)
Jackie never argues with me she just agrees with whatever I say
thing 2 (shauna)
It scares the shit out of me
nat 🚬
okay so your taste in girls is ass
thing 2 (shauna)
As if yours is better
nat 🚬
how do you know anything about mine
thing 2 (shauna)
Well don’t you like Lottie
nat 🚬
i dont know to be honest
thing 2 (shauna)
What
nat 🚬
what
thing 2 (shauna)
You?
thing 2 (shauna)
Don’t?
thing 2 (shauna)
Know?
thing 2 (shauna)
That’s shocking
nat 🚬
what really
thing 2 (shauna)
Wasn’t she buying you muffins in New York three days ago?
nat 🚬
well yeah but
nat 🚬
that doesnt mean anything
thing 2 (shauna)
I feel like it does
nat 🚬
you know what
nat 🚬
even if it did
nat 🚬
i wouldnt tell you
nat 🚬
its none of your business
thing 2 (shauna)
God you’re impossible
nat 🚬
i know its one of my most desirable traits
thing 2 (shauna)
DESIRABLE?
nat 🚬
you heard me
thing 2 (shauna)
Okay I’m gonna go before talking to you kills any more of my brain cells
nat 🚬
your loss
thing 2 (shauna)
Stop talking to me
thing 2 (shauna)
This lesson is interesting
nat 🚬
a slideshow about a dead white man is interesting to you
thing 2 (shauna)
BYE NATALIE
vantheman to nat_the_scat
Tuesday, September 28, 10:55 A.M.
redhead disease 🧡
sooooooo
redhead disease 🧡
where were you last night
nat 🚬
oh i had dinner at lotties
nat 🚬
we did our math hw together
redhead disease 🧡
ooooooooohhhhh
redhead disease 🧡
you good
nat 🚬
surprisingly yes
redhead disease 🧡
your dad didnt flip out on you??
nat 🚬
he almost did but its okay now
nat 🚬
i told lottie about it
redhead disease 🧡
oh
redhead disease 🧡
was she like a good listener???
nat 🚬
yeah i feel like she was???
redhead disease 🧡
and yet youre here making fun of her all the time
nat 🚬
yeah well shes annoying
redhead disease 🧡
yk what else she is
redhead disease 🧡
hot 👀
nat 🚬
nope
redhead disease 🧡
wdym nope
nat 🚬
i dont like where this is going
redhead disease 🧡
look its just that youve been acting a lil off lately
nat 🚬
wdym off
redhead disease 🧡
well you dont get angry as quickly
redhead disease 🧡
you dont flip out at misty for doodling on your notebooks during lunch
redhead disease 🧡
you pick up my calls
redhead disease 🧡
youre socializing
redhead disease 🧡
you havent threatened to off someone for at least a week
redhead disease 🧡
did you get a lobotomy
nat 🚬
no van i do not have a lobotomy
nat 🚬
everything is totally normal
redhead disease 🧡
well either way youre not acting like yourself
nat 🚬
uh yes i am tf???
redhead disease 🧡
okay if you say so
nat 🚬
okay THANK you
redhead disease 🧡
also i accidentally packed up your english notebook at lunch lmao
redhead disease 🧡
ill give it back tomorrow
redhead disease 🧡
nice drawing skills tho lottie was spot on!!!
flowergirlakilah to “IT GIRLZZZZZZ 💅”
Tuesday, September 28, 2:57 P.M.
akilah 🍀
guys
akilah 🍀
i am no longer single
misty 💟
Oh????
gen 🌀
OH MY GOD WHATTTTT
melissa 🌈
WHOA WHOA WHOA WHO IS IT????
mari ✨
guys
mari ✨
i am also no longer single
misty 💟
OH?????
melissa 🌈
WHAT
melissa 🌈
THE
gen 🌀
FUCKKKKKKKK
misty 💟
You two are dating???
gen 🌀
MARI YOU ACTUALLY PULLED IT OFF?????
melissa 🌈
THERES ACTUALLY NO WAY WHAT
misty 💟
Wowww thats so great!!!
melissa 🌈
SAY SIKE RIGHT NOW
gen 🌀
OH MY GAWDDDDD
mari ✨
HEHSHEHSHEHSHE YES
mari ✨
WE MADE OUT LIKE FIFTEEN MINUTES AGO
akilah 🍀
MARI
misty 💟
EEEEEEE REALLY??
akilah 🍀
YOU WERENT SUPPOSED TO TELL THEM THAT YET
mari ✨
IM SORRYYYY I COULDNT WAIT
misty 💟
HELP 😭
melissa 🌈
NO THIS IS A SIMULATION
melissa 🌈
FIRST MISTY NOW YOU TWO
misty 💟
Ohhhhh right!!
misty 💟
What are the odds???
gen 🌀
that means three down two to go
gen 🌀
i wanna be last to get a gf
melissa 🌈
does that mean im next 💀
misty 💟
Probably
mari ✨
yes and because you spent every second making fun of me and akilah you better start practicing your confession to shauna
melissa 🌈
i had a perfectly good excuse to do that
gen 🌀
honestly i agree
gen 🌀
im gonna have ptsd war flashbacks of mari flirting with akilah every single second and getting rejected every time because “sHe FlIrTs WiTh EvErYoNe”
akilah 🍀
can you really blame me though
mari ✨
yes
akilah 🍀
shut up
mari ✨
okay
misty 💟
Well
misty 💟
That was quick
gen 🌀
of COURSE melissa shuts up super fast when akilah tells her to do it
misty 💟
Its the girlfriend superpowers
mari ✨
wait girlfriend
mari ✨
HEHSJEHHJSKIHGSO
mari ✨
OMGHD GIRLFRIEND I LIKE THAT
akilah 🍀
okay well there goes the awkward ass “labels” convo
misty 💟
Yeah thats an easy way to solve it
gen 🌀
this is great i can finally know peace
melissa 🌈
okay can you guys explain how you confessed in explicit detail
melissa 🌈
asking for a friend obviously
misty 💟
I would also like to know
gen 🌀
me too but im just nosy
akilah 🍀
okay well uhhh
akilah 🍀
mari started it
mari ✨
yeah i actually tried being serious for once are you proud of me
misty 💟
Okay so what happened??
melissa 🌈
like what did you SAYYYYY
mari ✨
like you want the exact quote or smth
gen 🌀
yeah no shit she said explicit detail
mari ✨
“can we talk like for real for real and when i say for real i mean actually really for real”
misty 💟
…Oh
melissa 🌈
what was i expecting 💀
gen 🌀
okay but thats just her starter let her cook
akilah 🍀
she said “im sosososososo in love with you and i promise im not joking and i know you THINK im just flirting with you to piss you off but i promise im not because i like you so much and i just didnt even know if you liked me back, and i know that this is super stupid and im doing this wrong but i really just wanna be with you”
mari ✨
i said it all in one breath by the way
misty 💟
That’s actually…
misty 💟
Impressive
akilah 🍀
yeah unfortunately it kinda was
mari ✨
tfym UNFORTUNATELY
gen 🌀
OH LETS GO MARI
melissa 🌈
and then what happened
misty 💟
Huh
mari ✨
and then she kissed me??
melissa 🌈
you mean thats IT??
akilah 🍀
uh yeah??
misty 💟
I think its very sweet!!
gen 🌀
no melissa what were you expecting
melissa 🌈
SOMETHING MORE ROMANTIC IDK
mari ✨
THIS ISNT ONE OF JACKIES SLEEPOVER ROMCOMS
misty 💟
Sleepover romcoms??
akilah 🍀
jackie put on romcoms at every team sleepover
gen 🌀
you should come to the next one
misty 💟
Ohh that would be great!
mari ✨
so i guess your confession plan is ruined mel
melissa 🌈
yup
gen 🌀
NO YOU HAVE TO
gen 🌀
i need something to laugh at 😔
melissa 🌈
EXCUSE ME
misty 💟
LOL WHAT
akilah 🍀
who gave gen permission to be so outta pocket all the time
gen 🌀
what makes you assume i need permission
misty 💟
Uhhhh you dont??
gen 🌀
exactly
melissa 🌈
GEN COUNT YOUR DAYS
mari ✨
YOU COUNT YOUR DAYS MELISSA
mari ✨
EITHER YOU CONFESS TO SHAUNA OR WE SEND A FIRING SQUAD TO YOUR HOUSE
misty 💟
Firing squad??
akilah 🍀
NO FIRING SQUAD
mari ✨
BUT SHE WAS BEING MEAN
akilah 🍀
I DONT CARE NO SHOOTING
mari ✨
ALRIGHT FINE
misty 💟
And THAT is what true love looks like
gen 🌀
well melissas bullshit aside
gen 🌀
i actually am really happy for you two
mari ✨
AWWWWW THANK YOU GEN
misty 💟
Im super happy for you too!!
akilah 🍀
thanks misty
melissa 🌈
im happy for you guys too obviously
melissa 🌈
its just that mari needs to work on her talking to people skills
mari ✨
OH YOU SHOULD NOT BE TALKING
travmartinez to nat_the_scat
Wednesday, September 29, 11:18 A.M.
travis 👾
i said hi to lottie for you
rat girl 🤡
…motherfucker you did what
travis 👾
yeah
rat girl 🤡
why are you even talking to her
rat girl 🤡
the two of you should not even be interacting
travis 👾
were still working on that group project remember
rat girl 🤡
oh my god fuck that group project
travis 👾
why are YOU cursing out the group project
travis 👾
youre not even IN the group project
rat girl 🤡
that group project exists to torment me
travis 👾
and its funny as hell
rat girl 🤡
why because you get to embarrass me for it
travis 👾
i would embarrass you either way honestly
travis 👾
its just funny that your crush AND your ex are paired up
rat girl 🤡
its not funny it makes me wanna shoot myself in the skull
travis 👾
lottie is nice tho
travis 👾
she gave me half of her cinnamon bun today bc i didnt eat breakfast
rat girl 🤡
i thought she didnt like you
travis 👾
well now she does
travis 👾
bc im just soooooo likeable yk
rat girl 🤡
LMAOOOOOOO
rat girl 🤡
wow youre hilarious
rat girl 🤡
i just shed a tear
travis 👾
youre so rude and for what
rat girl 🤡
for my dignity
travis 👾
im not sure you have dignity
travis 👾
i mean you like lottie matthews
rat girl 🤡
thats more dignity than i usually had
rat girl 🤡
i mean its more dignity than liking you
travis 👾
is it just me or are you meaner today
rat girl 🤡
nope
rat girl 🤡
im happy
travis 👾
im sorry HAPPY?
rat girl 🤡
yep
rat girl 🤡
whys that so surprising
travis 👾
uhhhh because youve been in an emo phase for months
rat girl 🤡
well thats all over now
rat girl 🤡
im doing pretty great actually
travis 👾
OH MY GOD THIS ISNT RIGHT
travis 👾
I NEED A CROSS
rat girl 🤡
what do you mean
rat girl 🤡
is there something wrong with me being happy
travis 👾
yes
travis 👾
its voodoo
travis 👾
are you possessed
rat girl 🤡
nope
rat girl 🤡
just having a nice day
travis 👾
OH HELL NO BEGONE SATAN
jackierabbit to ss.shipman
Wednesday, September 29, 1:03 P.M.
jackie 💗🐇
hey!!!
shauna 🌛
Hey
jackie 💗🐇
what were you talking to laura lee about
jackie 💗🐇
just before class
shauna 🌛
What
shauna 🌛
What do you mean
jackie 💗🐇
you and laura lee
jackie 💗🐇
you were standing in the hallway
jackie 💗🐇
like whispering to each other
jackie 💗🐇
is smth going on???
shauna 🌛
Oh nonono nothing’s going on!!!
shauna 🌛
We were just talking about soccer
jackie 💗🐇
soccer
shauna 🌛
Yeah she was just saying she was really nervous
shauna 🌛
And she didn’t want to say anything because she didn’t want to worry you
jackie 💗🐇
oh
shauna 🌛
Yeah nothing big
shauna 🌛
You shouldn’t worry about it you’ve been worrying about Nationals enough
jackie 💗🐇
yeah ik
jackie 💗🐇
but thats all you guys were talking about?
jackie 💗🐇
just soccer
shauna 🌛
Yeah
shauna 🌛
Why what did you think we were talking about
jackie 💗🐇
oh i dont know
jackie 💗🐇
just random stupid stuff
shauna 🌛
Well it was kinda random and stupid
jackie 💗🐇
yeah haha
jackie 💗🐇
but is there anything else going on
shauna 🌛
What no
shauna 🌛
You don’t need to worry Jackie it’s fine
jackie 💗🐇
okay yeah no problem
shauna 🌛
Great <333
shauna 🌛
Oh by the way
shauna 🌛
Did you maybe wanna practice after school today?
jackie 💗🐇
ohhhh sorry i cant
jackie 💗🐇
i told jeff id hang out with him
shauna 🌛
Oh
shauna 🌛
That’s fine
jackie 💗🐇
we can hang out instead if you want tho!!
shauna 🌛
Oh no I really don’t mind
shauna 🌛
You should hang out with your boyfriend
jackie 💗🐇
yeah
jackie 💗🐇
i guess i should
shauna 🌛
If you want you can come over tomorrow if you’re free?
jackie 💗🐇
OOOOH YESSSSS
jackie 💗🐇
i would LOVE to
shauna 🌛
Okay so that’s settled
shauna 🌛
Have fun with Jeff today
jackie 💗🐇
ill try lol
shauna 🌛
What do you mean you’ll try
jackie 💗🐇
oh crap i gotta go before i get my phone taken
jackie 💗🐇
ILL SEE U AT LUNCH MWAH
shauna 🌛
Oh yeah no problem
shauna 🌛
Mwah
shauna 🌛
I guess?
ss.shipman to jesusloves you
Wednesday, September 29, 1:27 P.M.
shauna 🌛
Okay so this is probably a given
shauna 🌛
But do not tell Jackie or Jeff about the plan
laura lee ♱
Well yes, I knew that much
shauna 🌛
Okay just checking
laura lee ♱
May I ask though?
laura lee ♱
Why are we trying to get them to break up?
laura lee ♱
Haven’t they been dating since freshman year?
shauna 🌛
Yeah but on and off
shauna 🌛
That doesn’t count
laura lee ♱
I’d say it does if it’s been for four years
laura lee ♱
So why do you want this to happen so badly?
shauna 🌛
Okay so normally I’d say not to tell anyone but I’m fairly sure everyone else knows
shauna 🌛
But like rule 1 don’t randomly go saying this
laura lee ♱
Understood
shauna 🌛
I’m in love with Jackie
shauna 🌛
I have been for a while
shauna 🌛
And it’s getting completely out of hand and I feel awful when she’s with Jeff
laura lee ♱
Ohhhhhh I understand!!
shauna 🌛
Yeah I hoped you would
laura lee ♱
How sweet!
shauna 🌛
“Sweet” probably isn’t the word I would use
shauna 🌛
But thanks for the support
laura lee ♱
Of course!
laura lee ♱
Now that I think about it, I DID kind of sense something with you two
shauna 🌛
Of course you did
shauna 🌛
How did everyone pick up on it before me
laura lee ♱
Well to be fair, we’re friends with some observant people
shauna 🌛
We’re friends with some gay people
laura lee ♱
That too
nat_the_scat to ss.shipman
Wednesday, September 29, 3:43 P.M.
lottie 🦌
alright ill just say it
lottie 🦌
what are you scheming
bisexual stalin
What
lottie 🦌
wdym did you read it
bisexual stalin
Of course
bisexual stalin
I just don’t understand what you’re asking
lottie 🦌
nat told me that jackies antsy because shes seen you and laura lee sneaking around together
bisexual stalin
Oh is she
bisexual stalin
That’s a coincidence
lottie 🦌
yeah ik im not your best friend or anything
lottie 🦌
but i know you well enough to know that you wouldn’t privately talk with laura lee unless you had a scheme
lottie 🦌
which leads me to the conclusion that youre scheming
bisexual stalin
Sometimes when you’re smart it shocks me so much I get a stroke
lottie 🦌
im gonna pretend that was a compliment
bisexual stalin
No don’t do that
bisexual stalin
I wanted to be offensive
lottie 🦌
what are you scheming shauna marie shipman
lottie 🦌
please answer me pretty please
lottie 🦌
i have you backed into a corner
bisexual stalin
No you don’t and if I’m lucky you never will
lottie 🦌
SPEAK 🔫
bisexual stalin
Okay fine
bisexual stalin
You know Jackie and Jeff
lottie 🦌
oh my god
bisexual stalin
There’s no way you got it that fast
lottie 🦌
i hope im wrong
lottie 🦌
i really hope im wrong
bisexual stalin
I hope you’re wrong too
lottie 🦌
what about jackie and jeff
bisexual stalin
They’re going to break up soon
lottie 🦌
oh really???
lottie 🦌
i mean its about time
lottie 🦌
wait did jackie tell you that
bisexual stalin
No
bisexual stalin
Jackie doesn’t know
lottie 🦌
oh no i was right
bisexual stalin
Please no
lottie 🦌
youre gonna break them up
lottie 🦌
youre gonna SCHEME to BREAK THEM UP
bisexual stalin
Yes exactly
lottie 🦌
and how exactly do you plan on pulling this off
lottie 🦌
i mean apparently jackies already suspecting something
lottie 🦌
wait what does LAURA LEE have to do w this
bisexual stalin
Oh I asked for her help
bisexual stalin
To pull off the plan
lottie 🦌
SHAUNA 💀
bisexual stalin
What
lottie 🦌
laura lee
lottie 🦌
im sorry but that sweetie is not gonna be much help here
bisexual stalin
I guarantee you it’s fine
lottie 🦌
you couldve asked ANYONE else
bisexual stalin
Well I knew Laura Lee would agree if I told her I was motivated by love
bisexual stalin
Unlike you rude fucks
lottie 🦌
you mean us rational fucks
bisexual stalin
I’m rational too
bisexual stalin
Just wait until you see the plan
lottie 🦌
yeah im scared
bisexual stalin
Okay don’t be
lottie 🦌
okay but what if
lottie 🦌
maybe just maybe
lottie 🦌
the plan goes wrong
bisexual stalin
No it won’t
bisexual stalin
It’s going to work
bisexual stalin
It has to
lottie 🦌
something tells me this isn’t gonna go how you want it to shauna
bisexual stalin
Shhh yes it will
bisexual stalin
I just know it
Notes:
guysss were almost to the party!!! and then were almost done!!! idk if that's fun or if it terrifies me
so fun fact that lottie/shauna convo at the end was originally nat/shauna but I was having withdrawals from no lottie so I put her in the chapter because I need my sweetest little cult leader can you blame me
also the jv girls with their crackhead cameo moments...theyre there for like three seconds and they eat it up every time
(also yeah, shauna's scheme is NOT going according to plan lmao)
Chapter 11: the stupidest lesbians in new jersey
Summary:
lots and lots of party prep!! next chapter is the party, and everyone here's kinda going a little insane for it. Jackie finally grows some balls, laura lee pulls shauna out of her downward spiral, van and travis hatch a plan and bully nat into submission, and good lawddddd everything is gonna get real crazy real soon.
Notes:
okay, so idk how I'm gonna make this 20 chapters but I will find a way. that is my chapter goal and I have to reach that, otherwise i refuse to end this. but next chapter is the party and I PROMISE YOU shit is gonna go DOWN, just trust me: im gonna do the best i can to cover it all
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
vantheman to travmartinez
Friday, September 31, 4:22 P.M.
(917)-802-7896
hello mr martinez
travis 👾
oh god not dracula
(917)-802-7896
knew i approved of you
travis 👾
who texts like that tf??
(917)-802-7896
not me lolllll
(917)-802-7896
i was joking
travis 👾
thank fuck
travis 👾
wait who is this
(917)-802-7896
van palmer
(917)-802-7896
im nats friend
travis 👾
ohhhh yeah ik you
(917)-802-7896
and youre travis
travis 👾
yes i am
travis 👾
wsp
(917)-802-7896
its about nat
travis 👾
what about nat
(917)-802-7896
have you noticed how weird shes been acting lately
travis 👾
oh my god yes
travis 👾
she said this to me the other day
travis 👾
(insert screenshot)
(917)-802-7896
WHAT THE HELL
travis 👾
I KNOW
(917)-802-7896
shes been acting like she had a brain transplant for a week
(917)-802-7896
i caught her GIGGLING the other day
travis 👾
GIGGLING??
(917)-802-7896
GIGGLING.
travis 👾
OH MY GOD THIS ISNT RIGHT
(917)-802-7896
I KNOW LIKE IM GETTING SCARED
travis 👾
SHE ASKED ME HOW MY DAY WAS ON WEDNESDAY
travis 👾
I ALMOST CRIED
(917)-802-7896
she asked you how your DAY WAS???
travis 👾
FUCKING YES
(917)-802-7896
THIS CANT BE REAL
(917)-802-7896
THIS IS THE TWILIGHT ZONE
travis 👾
OH MY GOD TELL ME ABOUT IT
(917)-802-7896
I CAUGHT HER LISTENING TO A FLEETWOOD MAC SONG THE OTHER DAY
travis 👾
well of COURSE she was
(917)-802-7896
what
travis 👾
what
(917)-802-7896
do you know something
travis 👾
i might know something
travis 👾
what about you
(917)-802-7896
i might also know something
travis 👾
do we know the same thing tho
(917)-802-7896
methinks we do
travis 👾
you cant just say methinks
(917)-802-7896
well i just did
travis 👾
what do you know
(917)-802-7896
what do you know
travis 👾
you go first
(917)-802-7896
no you go first
travis 👾
jesus fine
travis 👾
do you know ANYONEEEEEE who also listens to fleetwood mac
(917)-802-7896
yes i do
travis 👾
do you know where nat was last weekend
(917)-802-7896
i do as a matter of fact
travis 👾
do we know the same thing
(917)-802-7896
we know the same thing
travis 👾
lottie??
(917)-802-7896
lottie.
travis 👾
oh my god
(917)-802-7896
theyre not subtle
travis 👾
theyre really not
(917)-802-7896
has she told you anything??
travis 👾
yeah
travis 👾
has she told you anything
(917)-802-7896
she has actually
travis 👾
okay so thats
travis 👾
interesting
(917)-802-7896
its also annoying
travis 👾
it is annoying a little
travis 👾
i mean
(917)-802-7896
mhmmmmm 👂
travis 👾
is this a safe space
(917)-802-7896
i pinky promise i will not tell anyone
(917)-802-7896
except like my lovely lovely girlfriend
travis 👾
and who would that be
(917)-802-7896
taissa
travis 👾
taissa turner
(917)-802-7896
mhm shes right next to me actually
(917)-802-7896
Hello Travis.
(917)-802-7896
that was her
travis 👾
i could tell
(917)-802-7896
sooooooo
(917)-802-7896
are you gonna tell us
travis 👾
nat and lottie were texting and lottie said this
travis 👾
(insert screenshot)
travis 👾
(insert screenshot)
(917)-802-7896
OH MY GOD????
travis 👾
I KNOW RIGHT
travis 👾
AND NAT LIKE LITERALLY THOUGHT SHE WAS TALKING ABOUT LAURA LEE
(917)-802-7896
SERIOUSLY??
travis 👾
unfortunately 💀
(917)-802-7896
holy BUTTCRACK she is stupid
travis 👾
i didnt even know what to tell her
(917)-802-7896
she has me THIS close to walking into traffic
travis 👾
at this point ill go with you
(917)-802-7896
taissa said shell go too
travis 👾
taissas smart
(917)-802-7896
she says thank you
(917)-802-7896
i feel like we need to do something
travis 👾
ik but like what
(917)-802-7896
hmmmmm
(917)-802-7896
arent you going to jackies party on tuesday??
travis 👾
yes i am
travis 👾
what you want us to force them to get together at the party
(917)-802-7896
maybe???
(917)-802-7896
like not FORCE them but something like it
travis 👾
what does taissa say
(917)-802-7896
taissa says that theyre lost causes and we should give up while we still can
travis 👾
wellllll
travis 👾
were not doing that are we
(917)-802-7896
LMAOOOOOO no
(917)-802-7896
but either way i have no ideas
travis 👾
i kinda do
travis 👾
its not exactly a plan but oh well
(917)-802-7896
dont be shy tell us
travis 👾
idk about lottie but nats gonna reach a breaking point damn soon
travis 👾
i say we wait until after the party and if nothings happened by then we do something
(917)-802-7896
thats actually kinda a good idea
travis 👾
why thank you
travis 👾
plus we only have a few days left then
(917)-802-7896
okay but the question is
(917)-802-7896
what if something DOES happen
travis 👾
it depends on what happens
(917)-802-7896
yeah that checks
(917)-802-7896
well thank you for your time mr martinez
travis 👾
youre very welcome ms palmer
(917)-802-7896
ill see you at the party
travis 👾
see you then
jackierabbit to ss.shipman
Saturday, October 1, 2:59 P.M.
jackie 🍓
soooooo
jackie 🍓
party soon
SHAUNA ❤
Yep
SHAUNA ❤
Party soon
jackie 🍓
😃
SHAUNA ❤
Oh no
SHAUNA ❤
Please don’t tell me you’re spiraling
jackie 🍓
i might be spiraling a little
SHAUNA ❤
JACKIE WE TALKED ABOUT THIS
jackie 🍓
ITS JUST A LITTLE SPIRAL
SHAUNA ❤
A LITTLE SPIRAL IS STILL A SPIRAL
jackie 🍓
look ill stop spiraling after the party
SHAUNA ❤
You better
jackie 🍓
im just nervous
SHAUNA ❤
Jackie you have no need to be nervous
SHAUNA ❤
You’ve already planned the party and whatever happens won’t be on you
jackie 🍓
i mean but can you blame me
jackie 🍓
some of the people coming to this party are a little insane
SHAUNA ❤
Well we’re all insane
SHAUNA ❤
But you should calm down
jackie 🍓
yeah i guess i should
SHAUNA ❤
Yeah it’s a PARTY
SHAUNA ❤
You should be excited
jackie 🍓
right
jackie 🍓
are you excited
SHAUNA ❤
Yeah relatively
jackie 🍓
im just gonna hope thats a good thing
SHAUNA ❤
It is
jackie 🍓
at least one of us is like looking forward to it
SHAUNA ❤
You’re not?
jackie 🍓
i am a little
jackie 🍓
i just think somethings gonna go wrong
SHAUNA ❤
Literally what made you think that
jackie 🍓
lottie told me she had a bad feeling
jackie 🍓
and lottie is usually right when she guesses this shit
jackie 🍓
so when she says she has a bad feeling i am rightfully scared
SHAUNA ❤
Lottie talks a lot of shit sometimes
SHAUNA ❤
Plus maybe the bad feeling is about her and not you
SHAUNA ❤
Who knows
jackie 🍓
uh lottie probably
SHAUNA ❤
Okay even if Lottie has a creepy record of guessing everything right
SHAUNA ❤
It’s just a bad feeling it’s not confirmed or anything
SHAUNA ❤
You should relax
jackie 🍓
yeah youre right
jackie 🍓
UGH why are you so right all the time
SHAUNA ❤
I’m not really
jackie 🍓
you really are
jackie 🍓
its one of the many awesome things about you
SHAUNA ❤
Oh
SHAUNA ❤
Thanks
jackie 🍓
maybe its also all the cleaning chemicals that are making me nervous
SHAUNA ❤
Sorry CLEANING CHEMICALS
jackie 🍓
yeah im cleaning the house before the party
jackie 🍓
ive been breathing in fumes for the last 40 minutes lolllll
SHAUNA ❤
Jackie oh my god
jackie 🍓
yeahhhhhh
jackie 🍓
i think im doing this wrong
SHAUNA ❤
I am positively sure you’re doing it wrong
SHAUNA ❤
I’m coming over
jackierabbit to “girlkissers official gc”
Saturday, October 1, 5:05 P.M.
jackie 🍓
do you guys ever have an impending sense of doom
jackie 🍓
like for no reason
jackie 🍓
youre just full of dread
lottie 🦌
does that mean youre thinking about what i said
van 🔥
no not really????
taissa ⚽
Lottie, what did you tell her?
lottie 🦌
just that i have a bad feeling
van 🔥
oh god thats never good
jackie 🍓
thats almost exactly what i said
taissa ⚽
Jackie, why are you full of dread?
jackie 🍓
because lottie said she has a bad feeling about the party
jackie 🍓
so now im dreading the party
van 🔥
youve been dreading that party since you planned it
van 🔥
and im not questioning that because its gonna make my brain hurt
jackie 🍓
ok well now i have a REASON to dread it
taissa ⚽
Lottie you filled her with dread.
lottie 🦌
i have a very good reason
jackie 🍓
yeah okay the dread just got worse
van 🔥
why
jackie 🍓
because WHATS THE REASON
lottie 🦌
oh never mind
jackie 🍓
what do you mean never mind
lottie 🦌
im probably not supposed to tell you
van 🔥
great now shes edging us
lottie 🦌
van i am not edging you what 😭
jackie 🍓
LOTTIE DONT EDGE US
taissa ⚽
Lottie is not “edging” any of you, please shut up.
taissa ⚽
Jackie, you need to relax.
jackie 🍓
ILL RELAX WHEN LOTTIE TELLS ME WHATS UP
lottie 🦌
i refuse
lottie 🦌
its a secret
jackie 🍓
oh my FUCKING GOD
taissa ⚽
Lottie, please just tell her.
van 🔥
yeah the suspense is gonna make me kms
lottie 🦌
you guys will find out at the party
jackie 🍓
am i gonna find out too
lottie 🦌
yup
van 🔥
i am going to SNAP MY OWN NECK
van 🔥
lottie bby save me from this suffering 😭💔
lottie 🦌
no thanks
jackie 🍓
ok so thanks for being absolutely useless lottie
lottie 🦌
anytime
jackie 🍓
im gonna go sob into a pillow until the party
taissa ⚽
Okay, please don’t do that?
jackie 🍓
ive been cleaning with shauna for hours
jackie 🍓
i think im allowed to be upset
taissa ⚽
Fine, I do kinda get it.
van 🔥
why are you cleaning for the party when the house is just gonna get trashed again
jackie 🍓
it was an excuse to get shauna to come over
lottie 🦌
of course it was
taissa ⚽
Why do we try at this point?
jackierabbit to “BUZZ BUZZ BUZZ 🐝”
Sunday, October 2, 12:03 P.M.
jackie 🍓
party on wednesday guys!!!
misty 🍄
We have a whole WEEK off school!!
van 🔥
OH HELLLLL YEAH LETS GET LIT
laura lee 😇
I’m very excited!!
jackie 🍓
yeahhh me too!!!
SHAUNA ❤
I can tell
SHAUNA ❤
You were stress cleaning yesterday
jackie 🍓
SHHHHSHHSHSHSHH DONT TELL THEM THAT
nat 🚬
tf u mean stress cleaning 💀
nat 🚬
why are YOU stressed jackie its ur party
jackie 🍓
i just want to make sure the house looks nice when everyone comes over
SHAUNA ❤
Jackie no one cares how neat your house is
van 🔥
someones gonna shit all over it at some point anyway
lottie 🦌
or puke
van 🔥
shit and puke at the same time
lottie 🦌
randy walsh at that one party core:
jackie 🍓
OH MY GOD LOTTIE NO
taissa ⚽
APOLOGIZE WITH TEARS, CHARLOTTE
nat 🚬
OH MY FUCKING SHIT I REMEMBER THAT LMAOOO
lottie 🦌
SEE NAT THINKS IM FUNNY
misty 🍄
Let’s just say no one will be pooping OR puking?
laura lee 😇
Yes please!
jackie 🍓
yeah the point is just that were all together!!!
nat 🚬
is the point also getting wasted and eating an 11 pound jar of nutella
nat 🚬
again
SHAUNA ❤
Oh god please no
jackie 🍓
yknow what sure
jackie 🍓
just no one puke on my carpet again or my mom is gonna turn into the joker
lottie 🦌
yeah van
van 🔥
IT WASNT EVEN ME LAST TIME
SHAUNA ❤
Yeah but the three times before that…
jackie 🍓
last time it was probably that one rando who sneaks into parties
lottie 🦌
nat used to do that
nat 🚬
travis used to come with me
taissa ⚽
And you would consume more alcohol than anyone in the zip code and almost get arrested every time.
nat 🚬
well i never puked on anyones carpet
jackie 🍓
for real????
laura lee 😇
Is it really that surprising?
SHAUNA ❤
You guys just have horrible alcohol tolerance
taissa ⚽
Van’s is okay, as long as she’s not mixing like seven different alcohols that should never be mixed.
van 🔥
i promise ill do better next time
van 🔥
she just kissed me for saying that
nat 🚬
i didnt ask
jackie 🍓
i didnt either and i still ate it up
lottie 🦌
great now i feel single
laura lee 😇
You shouldn’t!
lottie 🦌
what do you mean by that
laura lee 😇
…:)
lottie 🦌
WHAT DO YOU MEAN BY THAT???
nat 🚬
LAURA LEE WHAT DO YOU MEAN
jackie 🍓
LAURA LEE GET BACK ONLINE
misty 🍄
LMAOAOAOAOAO
lottie 🦌
WHAT THE HELL IS LAURA LEE TALKING ABOUT
nat 🚬
GUYS????
misty 🍄
I know what laura lee is talking about
SHAUNA ❤
I know what Laura Lee is talking about too
jackie 🍓
oh fucking absolutely
taissa ⚽
Most of us know at this point.
van 🔥
smiling and nodding
lottie 🦌
am i missing something
jackie 🍓
for now yes
SHAUNA ❤
At this point do we intervene
van 🔥
nuh uh
van 🔥
just waiiiittttttt 😈
jackie 🍓
oh god
jackie 🍓
should we be scared
van 🔥
not you
nat 🚬
lmao??
van 🔥
YOU.
vantheman to nat_the_scat
Sunday, October 2, 1:48 P.M.
redhead disease 🧡
PLEASEEEEEE tell me youre gonna do something at the party
nat 🚬
what are you talking about
redhead disease 🧡
motherfucker you know what im talking about
nat 🚬
it better not be what i think youre talking about
redhead disease 🧡
if you dont make out with lottie by the time we leave
redhead disease 🧡
i will do vile things and im not even joking
nat 🚬
okay so no thank you
redhead disease 🧡
no thank you to making out with lottie
redhead disease 🧡
or the vile things
nat 🚬
obviously the vile things you fucking idiot
redhead disease 🧡
okay so would you make out with lottie if i didnt do anything vile
nat 🚬
uhhhhhhhh that really depends
redhead disease 🧡
tf u mean it depends
redhead disease 🧡
its kissing girls or not kissing girls thats simple
nat 🚬
is lottie gonna slap me for it
redhead disease 🧡
you think she would slap you?
nat 🚬
if she wasnt into it then yeah
redhead disease 🧡
okay even if she wasnt lottie wouldnt slap you
redhead disease 🧡
shauna would slap you
redhead disease 🧡
taissa would slap you
redhead disease 🧡
lottie wouldnt slap you
nat 🚬
slap or no slap i would still be embarrassed
redhead disease 🧡
dont be embarrassed
nat 🚬
what is the point of this conversation van
redhead disease 🧡
for the good of this universe
redhead disease 🧡
me and travis need you and lottie to do SOMETHING soon
nat 🚬
you and travis
nat 🚬
you talked to travis about this
redhead disease 🧡
were your two best friends right
nat 🚬
why in the dickfuck would you do that
redhead disease 🧡
because thats how serious this is getting
nat 🚬
its really not that serious though
redhead disease 🧡
it is
redhead disease 🧡
travis has been fucking losing his shit having to listen to you pining
redhead disease 🧡
and i have too
nat 🚬
OKAY FIRST OF ALL I AM NOT PINING
nat 🚬
WHY WOULD YOU EVEN SUGGEST
redhead disease 🧡
shut up yes you are
redhead disease 🧡
its making me physically sick
redhead disease 🧡
and your unreasonably happy mood lately is making us question our sanity
nat 🚬
oh my god I TOLD YOU THAT WAS NOTHING
redhead disease 🧡
natalie please i need to be able to sleep at night
nat 🚬
so now you get what i went through before you and tai started dating
redhead disease 🧡
yeah you know how painful it is
redhead disease 🧡
so HELP
redhead disease 🧡
FREE US ALL FROM THIS SUFFERING
nat 🚬
ok well first of all put your last functioning brain cell to work
redhead disease 🧡
die????
nat 🚬
what do you even want me to do
redhead disease 🧡
i literally told you
redhead disease 🧡
i need you to make out with lottie for humanity to thrive
nat 🚬
well you also said “something”
nat 🚬
that could mean a lot of things
redhead disease 🧡
well for one you could tell her
nat 🚬
OH FUCK NO
redhead disease 🧡
NAT COME ON
nat 🚬
WHAT IF IT ALL BACKFIRES
nat 🚬
THERES NO WAY IN HELL IM DOING THAT
redhead disease 🧡
WHY CANT YOU
nat 🚬
I WOULD LITERALLY DIE IF SHE SAID SHE DIDNT LIKE ME BACK
nat 🚬
NO MATTER HOW NICE SHE WAS ABOUT IT
redhead disease 🧡
YOU JUST HAVE TO TRY
redhead disease 🧡
PLEASE
nat 🚬
theres actually no way in hell
redhead disease 🧡
there are several ways in hell
redhead disease 🧡
and im gonna use all of them if i have to
nat 🚬
and what does travis say
redhead disease 🧡
ask him yourself
redhead disease 🧡
lmao no just kidding
redhead disease 🧡
he says hes gonna shoot himself in the skull if he has to wait longer
redhead disease 🧡
we said that if you guys dont get together after the party were gonna make you do it
nat 🚬
im sorry youre gonna do WHAT
redhead disease 🧡
yeah you heard me
redhead disease 🧡
so either you make out with lottie yourself
redhead disease 🧡
or travis and i are gonna make you make out
nat 🚬
oh god
nat 🚬
that sounds like a nightmare
redhead disease 🧡
exactly
redhead disease 🧡
so pick
nat 🚬
im gonna have to be so fucking drunk for this
redhead disease 🧡
i can help you with that
nat 🚬
no youre gonna be too busy hooking up with taissa in some poor unsuspecting guest room
redhead disease 🧡
i can multitask
jesuslovesyou to ss.shipman
Sunday, October 2, 5:04 P.M.
laura lee ♱
So
laura lee ♱
Do you still want to go through with the plan?
shauna 🌛
Yeah of course
shauna 🌛
Why wouldn’t I
laura lee ♱
Oh no reason!
laura lee ♱
Just checking if you’re sure
shauna 🌛
Oh ok
shauna 🌛
Do you still want to do it at the party
laura lee ♱
Yes!
laura lee ♱
I know it’s mean but I think this is kind of fun
laura lee ♱
Plus Lottie told me that Jackie and Jeff were going to break up anyway soooo…
laura lee ♱
I didn’t really see the harm in doing it during the party
shauna 🌛
Wait
shauna 🌛
What
laura lee ♱
What
shauna 🌛
What
laura lee ♱
What do you mean?
shauna 🌛
What do you mean they’re gonna break up anyway
laura lee ♱
You didn’t know?
shauna 🌛
They’re gonna break up
shauna 🌛
Laura Lee why did you just go offline
shauna 🌛
Laura Lee get back here
jackierabbit to “girlkissers official gc”
Sunday, October 2, 11:48 P.M.
jackie 🍓
okay ive decided
lottie 🦌
decided what
van 🔥
cmon tell us jackie
taissa ⚽
It’s late, why aren’t you sleeping?
lottie 🦌
lmao sleep is for the weak
jackie 🍓
you guys have told me about the jeff thing
jackie 🍓
and i get it now
jackie 🍓
i have a plan
van 🔥
OH FUCKING HALLELUJAH
taissa ⚽
What’s the plan?
jackie 🍓
im gonna break up with him at the party
lottie 🦌
oh this is gonna be so good
Notes:
LETS GOOOOOO!!! my fav parts:
van and travis being besties because of nat is something that I love so much for literally no reason, I love their friendship so much tbh. they are THE lottienat wingmen, I guarantee you that.
jackie having an anxiety spiral my poor bby. the way shes stress cleaning for the party, and LAURA LEE ALMOST GIVING AWAY LOTTIENAT SEVERAL TIMES......HELP i love her
the way jackie's plan to break up w jeff is coinciding with shauna's....oh god this is not gonna be good
Chapter 12: the holy power of substances (and gay panic)
Summary:
its the day after the party. the team is in total pandemonium. nat is having a mental breakdown and lottie is starting to lose her mind from embarrassment and van and travis are, once again, SICK OF IT. laura lee is having a guilt-trip and misty is confused--taivan, our friendly neighborhood lesbians, provide everyone with exposition!!! and shauna and jackie...they need help.
Notes:
OKAY SO the party was actually terrible but DONT WORRYYYYYYY it wont all be awful for long...(by long i mean like at least after the next five chapters, that's the best i can do)
guys bear with shauna, my friend told me shes being really annoying and that is NOT the intent...shes not half as bad as she is in the show, shes just a jealous person!! ik I can relate
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
travmartinez to nat_the_scat
Thursday, September 11, 9:02 A.M.
daddy issues #2
nat
nat 🚬
no
daddy issues #2
NATALIE
nat 🚬
NO
daddy issues #2
NATALIE TALK TO ME
nat 🚬
I CANT IM HUMILIATED
daddy issues #2
please???
nat 🚬
i hate you
daddy issues #2
ohhhhhhhhhhhhmygod you IDIOT
daddy issues #2
IT WASNT MY FAULT YOU DID WHATEVER YOU DID
daddy issues #2
YOU WERE THE ONE WHO WAS BLACKOUT DRUNK
nat 🚬
I HATE VAN TOO
nat 🚬
SHE TOLD ME TO DO IT
daddy issues #2
YEAH BUT YOU DID IT YOURSELF FUCKHEAD
nat 🚬
i dont care im blaming both of you
daddy issues #2
well talk to lottie at least
nat 🚬
WHY WOULD YOU TELL ME TO DO THAT
nat 🚬
YOU KNOW HOW AWFUL THAT WOULD BE
daddy issues #2
NO I DONT ACTUALLY
daddy issues #2
BECAUSE YOU DIDNT TELL ME WHAT HAPPENED AT THAT PARTY
nat 🚬
OH MY GOD YOU DONT NEED TO KNOW
daddy issues #2
I KNOW ITS A BIG DEAL NATALIE
nat 🚬
AND HOW DO YOU KNOW THAT???
daddy issues #2
WELL
daddy issues #2
i had to drive you home early because you were a mess
daddy issues #2
and i had to listen to you crying in my backseat the whole way home
daddy issues #2
you kept saying “i MeSsEd EvErYtHiNg Up” and “sHe HaTeS mE” and all that shit
daddy issues #2
i almost swerved off the road like seven times
nat 🚬
i was doing that
daddy issues #2
yes you were
daddy issues #2
and then today i get a call from lottie fucking matthews asking me if youre okay
daddy issues #2
she asked me if she could talk to you and said that shes sorry
daddy issues #2
your entire soccer team is radio silent because of the whole
daddy issues #2
uh
daddy issues #2
jackie and shauna thing from yesterday
nat 🚬
oh my god so that did actually happen
nat 🚬
i dont know if that was hilarious or traumatizing
daddy issues #2
you should check on them
nat 🚬
yeah i guess i should
daddy issues #2
something happened with lottie last night right
nat 🚬
how did you know that
daddy issues #2
i connected the dots
nat 🚬
i didnt know you could do that
daddy issues #2
well thats about all i can do
daddy issues #2
so natalie
nat 🚬
oh jesus christ what now
daddy issues #2
do you wanna go get ihop
daddy issues #2
ll buy you pancakes
nat 🚬
is this a bribe to get me to talk to you
daddy issues #2
maybe
nat 🚬
can i get chocolate chips on the pancakes
daddy issues #2
yes you can
nat 🚬
the bribe is working
daddy issues #2
ill pick you up in ten minutes
vantheman to “BUZZ BUZZ BUZZ 🐝”
Thursday, October 11, 11:25 A.M.
van 😎
so that party was a disaster
fine shyt <333333
Van, please.
erm actually 🤓
Yeah i was wondering what happened there!!
van 😎
you didnt see ANY of it????
erm actually 🤓
No not really!
erm actually 🤓
I was hanging out with crystal for most of the time
van 😎
well
van 😎
at least someone had a chill wholesome night
fine shyt <333333
Can we not?
erm actually 🤓
Sooooooo what happened
LL
It’s my fault
fine shyt <333333
Van and I already told you it wasn’t, now shush.
LL
But it was
van 😎
laura lee i promise on my lord and savior banana bread
van 😎
what happened last night was NOT your fault
LL
But Shauna was furious with me
LL
She wouldn’t give me a ride home I had to go with Melissa
van 😎
oh GOD dont even get me STARTED on the melissa thing
fine shyt <333333
Laura Lee, Shauna was very angry, but not at you.
erm actually 🤓
Yeah it seems like shaunas just a bit of an angry person
van 😎
A BIT???
van 😎
oh misty honeybun 😭
LL
Should I apologize to her
fine shyt <333333
You have nothing to apologize for!
fine shyt <333333
Shauna will calm down soon enough, I know it.
erm actually 🤓
NOW can you guys tell me what happened
van 😎
oooooh yes storytime i love storytime
fine shyt <333333
Okay, Van
fine shyt <333333
From the top.
van 😎
so just for some context
van 😎
jackie is a lesbian
fine shyt <333333
And Shauna’s bisexual.
van 😎
mhm mhm and shaunas bisexual
van 😎
and they have a big fat ol crush on each other
van 😎
i know we all already knew that but confirmation is important
van 😎
me tai and lottie helped jackie
van 😎
and nat handled shauna even though nat isnt here atm
erm actually 🤓
Okay following so far
van 😎
laura lee take it from here
LL
All right?
LL
Shauna texted me about a week ago, saying she needed my help with a plan she had to break up Jackie and Jeff
fine shyt <333333
Oh, sweet Jesus.
LL
She said I wasn’t allowed to tell anyone about it, but Lottie apparently found out
van 😎
ofc lottie found out
van 😎
thats like the most likely person to do it
LL
But everything totally backfired at the party
erm actually 🤓
What was the plan?
LL
Shauna was supposed to distract Jackie while I distracted Jeff but it wasn’t working
LL
So I came up with some other plan B that I thought would work
van 😎
so at this point tai and i were leaving one of jackies guest rooms
erm actually 🤓
Why were you in a guest room?
fine shyt <333333
That’s not relevant, don’t worry.
van 😎
and right in front of us we saw shauna VERY UNSUBTLY leading jackie somewhere
van 😎
and shaunas saying smth about how she really needs to talk to jackie about like how jackie has a boyfriend and stuff
van 😎
and jackie just LETS GO OF HER HAND and goes “OH COME ON SHAUNA I KNOW YOURE HERE WITH MELISSA”
erm actually 🤓
WHAT????
fine shyt <333333
That’s what Shauna said!
fine shyt <333333
And she was saying “Misty told me how Melissa asked you here and how you said yes and I can’t BELIEVE you didn’t tell me!”
erm actually 🤓
Oh my god
erm actually 🤓
I just told jackie that melissa asked shauna out
erm actually 🤓
I NEVER told her shauna said yes!!
van 😎
YOU DIDNT?????
erm actually 🤓
NO!!!
fine shyt <333333
Oh my God, it’s all making sense.
LL
THAT’S what Jackie was talking about?
LL
I didn’t even know Melissa actually liked Shauna!
van 😎
SO JACKIE JUST ASSUMED???
fine shyt <333333
That’s what it seems like.
fine shyt <333333
God, why is she so fucking stupid?
van 😎
so anyway jackies yelling and shaunas yelling and then jeff shows up and HE starts yelling
fine shyt <333333
(By the way, Jackie had just recently told us she was going to break up with Jeff at the party.)
erm actually 🤓
Ooooooh really?
LL
Oh no, so they were both planning on it happening on the SAME NIGHT?
fine shyt <333333
Unfortunately?
van 😎
so jackies trying to get shauna to go away and shauna wont
van 😎
shes like clinging to jackies arm like a fucking koala bear
van 😎
they were all veryyyyyyyy drunk atp especially shauna
fine shyt <333333
Yeah, the wings on Shauna’s Juliet costume had fucking fell off one side.
fine shyt <333333
They looked kinda ridiculous.
van 😎
and jackies stupid karen smith mouse costume
van 😎
so jeff was like “WHAT THE HELL WHATS GOING ON”
fine shyt <333333
Shauna kept screaming at him to go away and Akilah from JV was trying to calm her down.
LL
Akilah was there?
van 😎
yeah she was the one dressed like tiana
van 😎
she kinda just spent the whole party making out with mari on the couch
erm actually 🤓
I didnt see much of the jv girls the whole night actually!!
van 😎
melissa was always like 2ft away from shauna pining
van 😎
in her stupid adventure time fit
fine shyt <333333
Oh my God, she looked horrendous.
van 😎
gen spent 99 percent of the party dancing
van 😎
i think her playlist was the one that was playing at first so tbh shes got good music taste
LL
She was the one with the plastic coat covered in blood right?
erm actually 🤓
Yeah and mari was the one in the pink
van 😎
no one listened to akilah tho and jackie and shauna kept arguing
van 😎
and then shauna puked on the floor
van 😎
and then jackie turns around and yells at jeff and shes like “IM BREAKING UP WITH YOU”
fine shyt <333333
Poor Jeff looked so confused.
fine shyt <333333
He kept saying “what” over and over.
van 😎
AND JACKIE KEPT REPEATING IT
van 😎
and then shauna looks up and shes like “JACKIE I WAS TRYING TO GET YOU GUYS TO BREAK UP THIS WHOLE TIME WDYM”
LL
OH GOODNESS I THOUGHT SHE KNEW
LL
I DIDN’T WANT TO GIVE ANYTHING AWAY SO I DIDN’T WANT TO TELL HER
fine shyt <333333
AND THEN RANDY FUCKING WALSH SHOWED UP
erm actually 🤓
Hes jeffs friend right
van 😎
for now 💀
LL
Oh no this is where my plan comes in
van 😎
so i think he SAID “yo laura lee dared me” but gens fucking PLAYLIST was too loud so no one could HEAR
van 😎
AND THEN HE JUST KISSES JEFF ON THE MOUTH???
erm actually 🤓
THAT WAS YOUR PLAN???
LL
THAT WAS MY PLAN
erm actually 🤓
WHY?
LL
Shauna’s original plan was to SOMEHOW dare Jeff and Randy into some kind of compromising situation in time for her to bring Jackie over there to catch them
LL
And just HOPE that if Jackie saw it she would break up with him, even though she was gonna do it anyway???
fine shyt <333333
I swear, there’s something wrong with her mind.
van 😎
jackie LOST HER SHIT
van 😎
travis martinez was laughing his ass off in the corner and honestly hes real for that
LL
What was Travis’s costume even supposed to be?
van 😎
wybie from coraline
van 😎
and nat and lottie werent there for most of it but well get to that later
fine shyt <333333
Actually, let’s not get to that at all.
van 😎
jeff kept being like IMSOSORRYIMSOSORRY and jackie was crying
van 😎
i think shauna was crying too but she had to puke again so tai took her to the bathroom
fine shyt <333333
And because taking care of her is a full-time job, Gen was there too, so she helped and had to turn off her playlist, which she kept complaining about.
fine shyt <333333
I was helping Shauna in the bathroom and Gen kept running back and forth to the kitchen to get her water.
van 😎
and then MARI took control of the music
van 😎
so we had to listen to ayesha erotica and cupcakke for the rest of the night which was EXTREMELY unfitting 😭
fine shyt <333333
At least we didn’t have to listen to Jackie play Taylor Swift for two hours.
erm actually 🤓
Me and laura lee shouldve played our music!!
LL
Yeahhh, maybe
van 😎
no because misty would play kpop and laura lee would play ethel cain and both of those would get you kicked out
van 😎
anyway by this point jackie and shauna had gotten into a full on screaming match
van 😎
they yelled at each other for like five minutes i think a couple “i hate yous” got thrown around there too
erm actually 🤓
Oh god SERIOUSLY???
van 😎
YES THEY WERE AT EACH OTHERS THROATS
van 😎
AND THE WHOLE TIME JEFF WAS STANDING THERE LIKE 🧍
fine shyt <333333
Shauna was yelling and yelling but then she stopped when Jackie started crying.
van 😎
yeah and then shauna started crying
van 😎
and then she almost puked again and she ran away
fine shyt <333333
I had to drive Shauna home that night and she was literally sobbing.
van 😎
i was in the car too she was inconsolable
van 😎
she kept asking for jackie and tai was praying to GOD that she wouldnt puke on the leather car seats 😭
LL
Oh was that AFTER she yelled at me?
fine shyt <333333
Yeah, she got into the car super angry and then just broke down in tears.
van 😎
she really wasnt that angry at you ll she was just upset
van 😎
maybe you should talk to her??
LL
I guess I should, yeah
vantheman to fleetwoodlottie
Thursday, October 11, 12:18 P.M.
ed sheeran ⚢
okay SO
lottie 🦌
what do you want
ed sheeran ⚢
are you okay
ed sheeran ⚢
you seemed pretty out of it last night
lottie 🦌
well we were all out of it
lottie 🦌
i just had a lot of those weed brownies britt made
ed sheeran ⚢
yeah well im not talking about the “i had too many weed brownies” out of it
ed sheeran ⚢
im talking about the “im rethinking all my life decisions” out of it
lottie 🦌
you dont know what youre talking about
lottie 🦌
i was fine last night
ed sheeran ⚢
lottie i need you to be so for real
ed sheeran ⚢
i see nat running out of the bathroom sobbing
ed sheeran ⚢
going up to travis and then she LEAVES EARLY
ed sheeran ⚢
and if theres one thing natalie scatorccio never does its leave a party early
lottie 🦌
well maybe you should talk to nat about this and not me
lottie 🦌
have you heard from her by the way
ed sheeran ⚢
and THEN when i went into the bathroom you were SITTING IN THE TUB???
ed sheeran ⚢
and your eyes were tearing up and you were just completely still
ed sheeran ⚢
i know lesbian heartbreak when i see it you cant fool me
lottie 🦌
fuck
lottie 🦌
i knew i wasnt gonna be able to lie to you for too long
ed sheeran ⚢
and you were correct
ed sheeran ⚢
now please tell me what happened
ed sheeran ⚢
apparently nats been in shambles and travis had to bribe her with pancakes
lottie 🦌
hey why didnt you buy me pancakes
ed sheeran ⚢
yk what tonight we can get thai food and watch as many studio ghibli movies as you want
ed sheeran ⚢
we dont need pancakes we do it better
lottie 🦌
i didnt realize we were competing
lottie 🦌
but hell yeah we do
ed sheeran ⚢
now come on what happened
ed sheeran ⚢
you cant run from me lottie matthews
lottie 🦌
okay fine jesus
lottie 🦌
so obviously nat was super drunk and high or whatever last night and at some point she got sick
lottie 🦌
so i went to the bathroom with her to try and help her out which was NOT a good idea because i was high asf too
ed sheeran ⚢
oh god
ed sheeran ⚢
the BATHROOM???
lottie 🦌
SHE HAD TO PUKE
lottie 🦌
REMEMBER WHAT JACKIE TOLD US ABOUT NOT PUKING ON THE CARPET???
ed sheeran ⚢
OKAY OKAY JUST TELL ME
lottie 🦌
she puked a couple times and i got her water
lottie 🦌
btw we were in the bathtub thats why you found me in there
ed sheeran ⚢
she PUKED in the BATHTUB??
lottie 🦌
NO SHE PUKED IN THE TOILET
lottie 🦌
but she fell in the bathtub which is why i got in there too
ed sheeran ⚢
SHE FUCKING FELL IN THE BATHTUB
ed sheeran ⚢
IM WHEEZING
lottie 🦌
and then she started fully fucking sobbing
lottie 🦌
and then she told me she was in love with me
lottie 🦌
and then she kissed me
lottie 🦌
and then she ran away
ed sheeran ⚢
…
ed sheeran ⚢
im sorry what did you just say
ed sheeran ⚢
because theres no way i read that right
lottie 🦌
oh my god
lottie 🦌
she started crying
lottie 🦌
then she told me she loved me
lottie 🦌
then she kissed me
lottie 🦌
and then she fucking bolted out of the room
ed sheeran ⚢
oh god so i did read it right
ed sheeran ⚢
im sorry what the actual fuck
lottie 🦌
AND I FUCKING FROZE
lottie 🦌
I FROZE!!!!!
lottie 🦌
I DIDNT KISS HER BACK I DIDNT STOP HER FROM RUNNING AWAY
lottie 🦌
I DIDNT EVEN TELL HER I LIKED HER
lottie 🦌
I JUST FUCKING FROZE UP
ed sheeran ⚢
okay yeah i get that youre embarrassed
ed sheeran ⚢
but freezing is literally not the worst thing you could have done in that scenario
lottie 🦌
oh really
lottie 🦌
okay then give me a worst case scenario
ed sheeran ⚢
well nat was scared you were gonna slap her
ed sheeran ⚢
so compared to that freezing up is pretty tame
lottie 🦌
wait what
lottie 🦌
so much of that sentence just flabbergasted me give me a second
ed sheeran ⚢
its okay i believe in you
lottie 🦌
first of all you talked to nat about this
lottie 🦌
second of all THAT WAS PLANNED??
lottie 🦌
third of all why did she think i would slap her
ed sheeran ⚢
okay for one yes i was actually trying to use the art of peer pressure
ed sheeran ⚢
for two no it wasnt planned nat was just really drunk
ed sheeran ⚢
she initially wasnt gonna do it BECAUSE she thought you would slap her
ed sheeran ⚢
and three BECAUSE SHE LIKES YOU????
lottie 🦌
oh my fucking god
ed sheeran ⚢
yeah you cant even deny it anymore
lottie 🦌
OH SWEET JESUS
lottie 🦌
GIVE ME A SECOND I NEED TO PROCESS
ed sheeran ⚢
lmao take your time girl
lottie 🦌
OKAY OKAY OKAY WHATTTTT
lottie 🦌
VAN
lottie 🦌
WHAT DO I DO
lottie 🦌
WHAT DID I DO
ed sheeran ⚢
YOU FUCKED UP
ed sheeran ⚢
and for what you CAN do
ed sheeran ⚢
i can help you figure it out tonight
lottie 🦌
wait really
ed sheeran ⚢
if youre actually down for thai food and ghibli movies then yeah
lottie 🦌
of course i am
lottie 🦌
i just
lottie 🦌
youre actually willing to spend a night on my catastrophic love life
ed sheeran ⚢
ofc i am were homies
ed sheeran ⚢
plus i get thai food out of it
ed sheeran ⚢
and plus PLUS my love life was catastrophic once too
lottie 🦌
easy to forget
lottie 🦌
you guys act like a married couple now
lottie 🦌
its insane that youve only been together for a month
ed sheeran ⚢
yes well we cant all be as lucky as me
ed sheeran ⚢
but im gonna try for you
lottie 🦌
yeah good luck with that
lottie 🦌
did you SEE nat she was devastated
lottie 🦌
how the hell do i get lucky with this
ed sheeran ⚢
theres a very specific procedure
ed sheeran ⚢
do not fear charlotte
ed sheeran ⚢
ill help you with a plan 😈
taiturner to ss.shipman
Thursday, September 11, 7:48 P.M.
taissa ♔
Shauna?
taissa ♔
Shauna, I know you’re really upset right now, but please talk to me.
taissa ♔
Shauna, come on.
taissa ♔
We’re all really worried about you.
shauna 🌛
Go away
taissa ♔
Come on, please?
shauna 🌛
No just fuck off Taissa
shauna 🌛
I don’t care if you guys are worried about me or not
taissa ♔
Shauna, if the whole catastrophe with Van taught me anything, it’s that it’s good to talk about this shit.
shauna 🌛
I don’t want to talk about it
taissa ♔
Do you really not want to talk about it?
taissa ♔
Or are you just upset?
shauna 🌛
I hate you
shauna 🌛
I hate all of you
shauna 🌛
No actually I hate myself
shauna 🌛
WHY WOULD I DO THAT
taissa ♔
I get it, but it wasn’t entirely your fault.
shauna 🌛
Tai it was totally my fault
shauna 🌛
Be so honest
taissa ♔
Okay, fine, you fucked up big time.
taissa ♔
It’s kind of not a secret.
shauna 🌛
Ouch
shauna 🌛
But okay that’s fair
taissa ♔
You fucked up, but this isn’t beyond repair.
taissa ♔
You can still fix things with you and Jackie.
shauna 🌛
I’m sorry did you SEE our fight???
taissa ♔
Yes, I did.
taissa ♔
But I’ve also seen how much you two care about each other.
shauna 🌛
Yeah well it’s too late
shauna 🌛
I fucked it all up because I was jealous and because of my stupid plan
taissa ♔
It’s not too late if you still want to try.
taissa ♔
Do you want to fix things with Jackie, Shauna?
shauna 🌛
Yes of course
shauna 🌛
But I was a dick she probably doesn’t care
taissa ♔
I really, really doubt that.
taissa ♔
Shauna, you can still fix this.
shauna 🌛
Literally how
shauna 🌛
It’s gonna be impossible
taissa ♔
Yeah, trust me
taissa ♔
It won’t.
africangrey to jackierabbit
Thursday, September 11, 8:22 P.M.
misty 🍄
Hi jackie!!
jackie 🍓
oh hi misty
misty 🍄
Are you okay?
misty 🍄
I found out about what happened with you and shauna
jackie 🍓
you did
jackie 🍓
oh who am i fucking kidding of course you did
jackie 🍓
everyone at that party probably knows at this point
misty 🍄
Yeahhhhhh
misty 🍄
But how are you?
jackie 🍓
im good
jackie 🍓
im totally fine
jackie 🍓
i know i just broke up with my best friend and my boyfriend on the same night
jackie 🍓
but im doing great
misty 🍄
Jackie
misty 🍄
You can be honest
misty 🍄
Are you okay?
jackie 🍓
no
jackie 🍓
im fucking miserable actually
misty 🍄
Oh jackie im so sorry
misty 🍄
Do you wanna talk about it?
jackie 🍓
i mean not only was she lying to me about the melissa stuff
misty 🍄
Oh god jackie
misty 🍄
She actually wasnt lying
jackie 🍓
what
jackie 🍓
what do you mean
misty 🍄
When i showed you the screenshots of melissa asking shauna out
misty 🍄
I didnt include the screenshots of when melissa told us shauna turned her down
jackie 🍓
SHAUNA TURNED HER DOWN???
misty 🍄
YES SHE DID
jackie 🍓
oh my god i was making such a big deal over nothing
jackie 🍓
i YELLED at her over NOTHING???
misty 🍄
No jackie im sorry
misty 🍄
I shouldve told you shauna said no
misty 🍄
You wouldve been able to avoid this whole misunderstanding
jackie 🍓
ohhhhhhhh misty no!!
jackie 🍓
this was NOT your fault
jackie 🍓
its on me for assuming and making a problem out of nothing
misty 🍄
I mean maybe you assumed
misty 🍄
But you shouldnt put all the blame on yourself jackie
jackie 🍓
i just
jackie 🍓
i shouldve just TALKED to shauna
jackie 🍓
i just wish she told me or something
misty 🍄
Yeahhhhh i totally get it
misty 🍄
I completely understand why youre upset
jackie 🍓
i always hate it when we fight
jackie 🍓
but this one was just SO MUCH WORSE i dont even know how to make it better
misty 🍄
Jackie i understand what youre feeling but
misty 🍄
You know you dont ALWAYS have to make everything better right
jackie 🍓
yeah i know
jackie 🍓
i mean no i dont
jackie 🍓
i mean i just
jackie 🍓
i really miss her
misty 🍄
Jackie….
misty 🍄
Its been less than 24 hours
jackie 🍓
yeah but its just crazy because
jackie 🍓
shauna was trying to break me and jeff up????
jackie 🍓
i mean who does that
jackie 🍓
WHY would she do that??
misty 🍄
Well i dont know for sure
misty 🍄
So just ignore me if you want
jackie 🍓
nonono ofc not!!
jackie 🍓
whats up??
misty 🍄
Well maybe shauna was just
misty 🍄
Jealous?
jackie 🍓
wdym jealous
jackie 🍓
why would SHAUNA ever be jealous
jackie 🍓
jealous of me
misty 🍄
Welllllll actuallyyyyy
misty 🍄
I was thinking more like she was
misty 🍄
Maybe
misty 🍄
Jealous of jeff?
Notes:
I TOLD YOU THE PARTY WAS INSANE...GOD
(also the music tastes is canon to me, am i right or am i right)
LAURA LEE...her plan was awful but shes trying, cut her some slack
god jackie and shauna....they are so messy why cant they just TALK--they love making things more complicated than they need to and i hate it but everything that happened at that party is both funny as hell and is physically painful
lottienat cannot stop being stupid like OUCH yeah if i was either of them id be embarrassed but oh my GODDDDDDD just TALK???? van and travis actually need awards for the bullshit they put up with on the daily
Chapter 13: hello and welcome to the ptsd era, stay a while
Summary:
yeahhhhh, so after the whole last-chapter fiasco, everyones adjusting. laura lee and shauna/jeff and jackie ATTEMPT to sort things out. with travis and vans help, nat and Lottie are FINALLY able to grow some balls and thank god that parts almost over (whoops, spoilers???) ONLY 7 CHAPTERS LEFT, LETSGO
Notes:
this is my shauna redemption you guys. her in this fic is so important to me so please cut her some slack
also i just got bangs and i fucking hate them, please pray for me
idk if i'm excited or panicking that this fic is close to almost done because thats both awesome and scary
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
jesuslovesyou to ss.shipman
Friday, October 12, 11:29 A.M.
laura lee ♱
Shauna?
shauna 🌛
Hey Laura Lee
shauna 🌛
I was actually going to talk to you
laura lee ♱
You were?
shauna 🌛
Yeah I was
shauna 🌛
So look
laura lee ♱
I’m very very sorry Shauna
shauna 🌛
What
shauna 🌛
YOU’RE sorry?
laura lee ♱
Yes
laura lee ♱
I messed up the plan you said so yourself
laura lee ♱
Because of my plan B, you and Jackie aren’t speaking
shauna 🌛
Oh my God Laura Lee no
shauna 🌛
Nonononono
shauna 🌛
I should be apologizing
laura lee ♱
What
shauna 🌛
You tried really hard and you stuck with the plan and you were really really sweet
shauna 🌛
I shouldn’t have yelled at you at all, I was just really drunk
shauna 🌛
And I know that’s not a good excuse but I’m really really sorry
shauna 🌛
The reason Jackie and I aren’t talking is because I was stupid and got jealous and made a stupid plan
shauna 🌛
It was NOT because of you
shauna 🌛
I’m sorry Laura Lee
laura lee ♱
You’re forgiven Shauna!
shauna 🌛
What
shauna 🌛
I am
laura lee ♱
Yes
laura lee ♱
You said you were sorry and I believe you
laura lee ♱
I’m not angry at you at all
shauna 🌛
Holy fuck you are way too sweet
shauna 🌛
Sometimes you need to work on being meaner
laura lee ♱
Why is that something anyone would need to work on?
shauna 🌛
Ask Taissa
shauna 🌛
But thank you for forgiving me regardless
shauna 🌛
I felt like shit I fully expected you to be mad at me
laura lee ♱
Well I wasn’t mad, I was more anxious??
laura lee ♱
I could tell you were really really upset and I had no idea how bad everything had gotten
shauna 🌛
Pretty bad
shauna 🌛
But you probably know all that by now
laura lee ♱
Yes, I do
laura lee ♱
Are you okay?
shauna 🌛
Honestly?
shauna 🌛
Nope
laura lee ♱
I think I expected that
laura lee ♱
Is it about Jackie?
shauna 🌛
Yeah I think most of it is
shauna 🌛
But a lot of it is just heaps of this weirdly vicious guilt
laura lee ♱
What do you mean guilt?
shauna 🌛
I don’t know it’s just that
shauna 🌛
I was just so jealous that I went crazy???
shauna 🌛
And I spent ALL THIS TIME trying to sabotage my BEST FRIEND, who I should care about and want the best for no matter what
shauna 🌛
And I roped YOU into it and I did all this fucked up stuff and I just kept ruining things and I was like DESPERATE for Jeff and Jackie’s DOWNFALL
shauna 🌛
But I just gaslit myself and ruined so much of her life for no reason other than my own gain because I was in love with her and it’s just like
shauna 🌛
Am I a bad person?
laura lee ♱
No, I don’t think so
laura lee ♱
If you’re feeling this guilty then I definitely don’t think so
shauna 🌛
I feel like a bad person
shauna 🌛
And of course THAT all goes back to Jackie
shauna 🌛
Because of course it does
laura lee ♱
You should talk to her
shauna 🌛
I mean maybe I SHOULD
shauna 🌛
But I really don’t think it’s gonna go well
laura lee ♱
Why not?
laura lee ♱
I’m sure she’s upset too
shauna 🌛
Yeah no I don’t doubt that she’s upset
shauna 🌛
I just feel like it’s a different kind of upset
laura lee ♱
What different kind of upset
shauna 🌛
I mean you’ve seen me
shauna 🌛
I’m losing my mind and spiraling into depression
shauna 🌛
If anything I’m sure Jackie is probably super pissed off at me
shauna 🌛
She’s most likely not heartbroken
jackierabbit to “girlkissers official gc”
Friday, October 12, 11:56 A.M.
jackie 🍓
okay so im heartbroken
taissa ⚽
Is there any way we can help you with that?
lottie 🦌
lmao me too girl
van 🔥
lottie what did i literally JUST TELL YOU last night
jackie 🍓
im sorry last NIGHT
lottie 🦌
no not like that dont worry tai
taissa ⚽
I wasn’t worried.
van 🔥
lottie came over to my house and we ate food and she talked about her problems
jackie 🍓
what problems
van 🔥
ill give you a hint
van 🔥
it starts with natalie
van 🔥
and ends with scatorccio
lottie 🦌
i need to put a muzzle on you i swear to god
jackie 🍓
lmao lottie its fine
jackie 🍓
my problems start with shauna and end with shipman so id say youre doing better
taissa ⚽
Both of your problems are equally invalid.
jackie 🍓
oh wow thanks
jackie 🍓
does everyone who was at the party know what happened by now
van 🔥
not EVERYONE im pretty sure
jackie 🍓
oh god
jackie 🍓
so who knows
taissa ⚽
Obviously you, Shauna, Jeff, and Randy.
taissa ⚽
Van, Lottie, Natalie, Misty, Laura Lee, and I know too.
taissa ⚽
Travis saw it and so did Akilah, but I think that’s it.
jackie 🍓
ok ik the rest of you wont tell anyone
jackie 🍓
jeff and randy will probably be too embarrassed to say anything and im not worried about travis really
jackie 🍓
i dont really know about akilah
lottie 🦌
yeah no akilahs not a problem
lottie 🦌
maris the one you need to worry about
jackie 🍓
yeah shes the one who cant keep her mouth shut
taissa ⚽
Wait, Mari didn’t even see, just Akilah did.
van 🔥
how would mari find out
lottie 🦌
i mean akilah could tell her
lottie 🦌
now that theyre dating
jackie 🍓
THEYRE DATING????
lottie 🦌
yeah????
van 🔥
OH GODDAMN REALLY???
taissa ⚽
I mean, good for them??
jackie 🍓
oh great so everyone has a girlfriend
jackie 🍓
lmao fuck my life
van 🔥
AWWW JACKIE NOOO
lottie 🦌
i am actually so far from having a girlfriend
lottie 🦌
if that helps
taissa ⚽
Lottie, I’m fairly sure you’re not.
jackie 🍓
yeah lottie you dont need to worry about anything
jackie 🍓
youre hot
lottie 🦌
what jackie no
lottie 🦌
youre hot
van 🔥
i think youre both hot but go off i guess
taissa ⚽
Van’s right, Jackie, you are.
taissa ⚽
But something tells me that’s not where your problem lies here.
jackie 🍓
yeah my PROBLEM LIES in the fact that the love of my life is avoiding me
jackie 🍓
which is why im heartbroken
van 🔥
well shes not really AVOIDING YOU
van 🔥
but like yeah you got into a fight
jackie 🍓
thats not helping
taissa ⚽
Van means that, by that logic, you’re both avoiding each other.
lottie 🦌
tai no one gaf about logic
lottie 🦌
in the nicest way possible
jackie 🍓
honestly yeah
van 🔥
yeah no shit i can tell
vantheman to fleetwoodlottie
Friday, October 12, 12:14 P.M.
van 😎
lottie my babygirl
van 😎
you have to do what we talked about
schizophrenia incarnate
i would literally rather puke and eat it
van 😎
yeah no i think nat does enough puking for both of you
schizophrenia incarnate
please dont bring her up
schizophrenia incarnate
im gonna start sobbing again
van 😎
oh god please not again
van 😎
you did that like five times last night
van 😎
my thai food tasted like your tears and misery
schizophrenia incarnate
you still ate it
van 😎
of course i ate it it was thai food
van 😎
but for everyones good you really need to stop
schizophrenia incarnate
excuse me
schizophrenia incarnate
are you seriously saying THAT to a depressed girl
van 😎
yeah i know i sound like a bitch rn
van 😎
but it must be said
schizophrenia incarnate
yeah no
schizophrenia incarnate
why must it be said
van 😎
our team is facing an insane amount of depression and heartbreak right now
van 😎
youre depressed and heartbroken
van 😎
nat is depressed and heartbroken
van 😎
jackie is depressed and heartbroken
van 😎
and i havent talked to shauna but im sure she is too
schizophrenia incarnate
i mean im sorry??
schizophrenia incarnate
what
van 😎
that is a crazy amount of depression and heartbreak for just four psych ward escapees to deal with
van 😎
and if you get your shit together sooner rather than later you can decrease that amount by literally half
schizophrenia incarnate
i doubt that
van 😎
you really really shouldnt
van 😎
you know how right i am
schizophrenia incarnate
honestly i know the total opposite of that
schizophrenia incarnate
youve been fucking things up since we were like
schizophrenia incarnate
ten
van 😎
okay but this time im right
van 😎
i KNOW i am
van 😎
we came up with a plan last night and i need you to do it
schizophrenia incarnate
no YOU came up with the plan
schizophrenia incarnate
i was trying to pay attention to the damn movie
van 😎
you were pretending to pay attention to the movie and you know it
van 😎
and my plan was good
van 😎
you know that too
schizophrenia incarnate
actually i really dont
van 😎
okay lottie
van 😎
my pookie
van 😎
pb to my j
van 😎
shrek to my donkey
schizophrenia incarnate
im gonna need you to stop
schizophrenia incarnate
also wtf why am i shrek
van 😎
because im clearly donkey
van 😎
but anyway
van 😎
whether you wanna do it or not you know you need to
van 😎
because you keep saying you fucked up
schizophrenia incarnate
because i DID fuck up
van 😎
and you know how you can fix that
van 😎
BY GOING WITH THE PLAN!!!
schizophrenia incarnate
THIS IS PEER PRESSURE
van 😎
YEAH BECAUSE PEER PRESSURE FUCKING WORKS
van 😎
YOU KNOW HOW I KNOW???
schizophrenia incarnate
NO I REALLY DONT
van 😎
because youre actually considering doing it right now
schizophrenia incarnate
what
schizophrenia incarnate
no im not
van 😎
yes you are
van 😎
because yk im actually psychic
schizophrenia incarnate
oh are you
van 😎
mhm
van 😎
and i can feel you wanting to do it through the screen
schizophrenia incarnate
literally what would i even say
van 😎
it doesnt matter
van 😎
you just have to say something
schizophrenia incarnate
this is going to go soso badly
van 😎
WHO CARES
van 😎
DO IT
van 😎
DO IT
van 😎
DO IT
van 😎
DO IT
van 😎
DO IT
schizophrenia incarnate
OKAY JESUS
schizophrenia incarnate
IM GOING IM GOING
travmartinez to nat_the_scat
Friday, October 12, 12:34 P.M.
daddy issues #2
soooooooooo
daddy issues #2
how are we feeling
nat 🚬
lol awful
daddy issues #2
natalie
nat 🚬
what????
nat 🚬
literally everything was perfect before the party and i fucked everything up
nat 🚬
like we were GREAT
nat 🚬
i fucking went over to her house
nat 🚬
i met BOTH her parents
nat 🚬
and i just HAD to fuck it up
daddy issues #2
have you like
daddy issues #2
tried holding up at least???
daddy issues #2
do you need me to come over or would your dad kill me
nat 🚬
honestly idk
nat 🚬
but im sure as fuck not holding up
nat 🚬
she took me to new york for a whole weekend
nat 🚬
we SHOPLIFTED TOGETHER
daddy issues #2
i like how the shoplifting was the more important part
daddy issues #2
says a lot about your relationship
nat 🚬
no but she invites me over and texts me in the mornings and buys me food and then does THIS???
nat 🚬
i have no idea if im sad or embarrassed or angry or just so fucking confused
daddy issues #2
and all of those make sense
nat 🚬
i feel like a bag or horse shit
daddy issues #2
oh shit its THAT bad???
nat 🚬
yeah no shit its that bad
nat 🚬
i fucked everything up with the first person i was ACTUALLY in love with
daddy issues #2
okay rude
nat 🚬
i need you to shut up
nat 🚬
but the worst part is that i still like her just as much
nat 🚬
more actually if im being honest
daddy issues #2
all right well i need you to talk to me instead of making fun of me or crying
nat 🚬
okay why the fuck are you talking
daddy issues #2
because im trying to fucking help you
daddy issues #2
and because being mean to people isnt gonna solve your problems
daddy issues #2
and talking about it actually might
nat 🚬
yeah youre right
nat 🚬
i was being a bitch
nat 🚬
sorry
daddy issues #2
well thank you
daddy issues #2
now do you actually want me to come over orrrrrr
nat 🚬
i actually might
nat 🚬
let me check if my parents are home
daddy issues #2
please do
daddy issues #2
i dont want to get thrown out
daddy issues #2
again
nat 🚬
yeah ill be right back give me a minute
nat 🚬
OH GOD FUCKING DAMNIT
daddy issues #2
its been two seconds nat what
nat 🚬
LOTTIE JUST TEXTED ME
daddy issues #2
OH MY GOD WHAT
daddy issues #2
YEAH OKAY NEVERMIND FORGET ME COMING OVER
nat 🚬
WAIT REALLY???
daddy issues #2
YES HELLO????
daddy issues #2
WHO CARES
daddy issues #2
TEXT HER BACK
daddy issues #2
GOGOGOGOGOGOGOGO
nat 🚬
FUCK OKAY
fleetwoodlottie to nat_the_scat
Friday, October 12, 12:40 P.M.
spawn from hell (loml 💕)
natalie?
nat 🚬
yup
nat 🚬
thats me
spawn from hell (loml 💕)
okay so i guess i just say it
spawn from hell (loml 💕)
im really really sorry nat
nat 🚬
sorry what
spawn from hell (loml 💕)
i said im sorry
spawn from hell (loml 💕)
for the thing in the bathroom
spawn from hell (loml 💕)
i totally freaked you out so
nat 🚬
no i mean the thing in the bathroom was my fault
nat 🚬
and technically it was ME who freaked YOU out
spawn from hell (loml 💕)
no but i wasnt freaked out
spawn from hell (loml 💕)
i should have at least said something
nat 🚬
im sorry are you saying youre NOT mad at me for kissing you and confessing to you and then literally running away????
spawn from hell (loml 💕)
nope
spawn from hell (loml 💕)
it confused me a little but im definitely not mad
nat 🚬
okay so why?
spawn from hell (loml 💕)
because
spawn from hell (loml 💕)
ive been in love with you for a while
spawn from hell (loml 💕)
like a while
nat 🚬
oh
spawn from hell (loml 💕)
i know it was stupid but it freaked out and just froze
spawn from hell (loml 💕)
i shouldnt have done that or i shouldve at least tried
spawn from hell (loml 💕)
but really YOU didnt mess up
nat 🚬
oh
spawn from hell (loml 💕)
but ive liked you for a really long time
spawn from hell (loml 💕)
i mean i dont want to scare you but im really in love with you
spawn from hell (loml 💕)
and im sorry for making you freak out
nat 🚬
oh
spawn from hell (loml 💕)
can you please say something other than oh
nat 🚬
i mean i told you i like you too but
nat 🚬
i really really like you lottie
nat 🚬
i think i like you more than anyone which is scary as fuck but oh well
nat 🚬
i just have no idea what im doing with this stuff and i just kind of assumed that you liked me and kissed you???
nat 🚬
at least i was right though
spawn from hell (loml 💕)
yeah id say you were definitely right
spawn from hell (loml 💕)
ive liked you since freshman year
nat 🚬
wait FRESHMAN YEAR???
spawn from hell (loml 💕)
yeah
spawn from hell (loml 💕)
remember when you bleached your hair for the first time
nat 🚬
yeah
spawn from hell (loml 💕)
yeah that was it for me
nat 🚬
lottie that was four whole years ago
nat 🚬
youve liked me for FOUR YEARS??
spawn from hell (loml 💕)
remember when i told you my gay awakening was that one girl
nat 🚬
oh my god you were talking about me
spawn from hell (loml 💕)
i was talking about you
nat 🚬
thats what fucking travis told me
spawn from hell (loml 💕)
yeah fucking travis was right
nat 🚬
unfortunately
nat 🚬
hes gonna make fun of me for that
spawn from hell (loml 💕)
maybe i can bribe him not to
nat 🚬
yeah but um
nat 🚬
i mean i havent liked you for FOUR YEARS but
nat 🚬
i do like you a lot
nat 🚬
and im sober rn so i can finally say that without having a panic attack
spawn from hell (loml 💕)
okay so
spawn from hell (loml 💕)
we like each other
nat 🚬
fuck yeah
nat 🚬
what do we do now
spawn from hell (loml 💕)
wdym
spawn from hell (loml 💕)
are we supposed to do something
nat 🚬
i think so
nat 🚬
what would van want us to do
spawn from hell (loml 💕)
…nat
spawn from hell (loml 💕)
that is literally the worst thing to go off of
nat 🚬
yeah now that i think about it
nat 🚬
i feel like we dont wanna be doing that
spawn from hell (loml 💕)
i mean
nat 🚬
what
spawn from hell (loml 💕)
never mind
spawn from hell (loml 💕)
do you wanna come over
nat 🚬
wait really
spawn from hell (loml 💕)
yeah really
spawn from hell (loml 💕)
didnt we say that only pussies confess over text
nat 🚬
yeah we keep making fun of tai and van for doing that
spawn from hell (loml 💕)
exactly
spawn from hell (loml 💕)
sooooo do you want to come over
spawn from hell (loml 💕)
my parents wont mind
nat 🚬
i mean yeah
nat 🚬
sure i guess
spawn from hell (loml 💕)
are you seriously trying to be nonchalant right now
nat 🚬
kind of
nat 🚬
i just kicked my feet so hard i rolled off my bed
spawn from hell (loml 💕)
i knew it
nat 🚬
gimme a sec im putting my shoes on
nat_the_scat to travmartinez
Friday, October 12, 12:50 P.M.
rat girl 🤡
okay so slight change of plans actually
rat girl 🤡
im going over to lotties
travis 👾
OH MY GOD?????
travis 👾
YES
travis 👾
YES
travis 👾
HALLELUJAH
travmartinez to vantheman
Friday, October 12, 12:51 P.M.
travis 👾
VAN
travis 👾
WE DID IT
travis 👾
WE FUCKING DID IT WAR IS OVER
LETS GO LESBIANS?????
YEAHHHHHH
LETS GO LESBIANS?????
SORRY WHAT DID WE DO
jackierabbit to mrjeffsadecki
Friday, October 12, 5:55 P.M.
jackie 🍓
hi jeff
jackie 🍓
can i talk to you
jeff 💩
im sorry what do you even want with me
jackie 🍓
jeff please
jackie 🍓
i just want to talk to you
jeff 💩
well i dont want to talk to you
jeff 💩
jackie you already fucking broke up with me what's left to talk about
jackie 🍓
i know and im so so so sorry
jackie 🍓
for everything ive done to you
jackie 🍓
i was a bad girlfriend and i wasnt fair at the party
jeff 💩
you werent a bad girlfriend
jeff 💩
but the party stuff i mean yeah
jackie 🍓
no i was a jerk to you for a while and you didnt deserve it
jackie 🍓
what i said to you at the party was awful
jeff 💩
wait is this
jeff 💩
do you like wanna get back together
jackie 🍓
oh well um
jackie 🍓
no not really
jeff 💩
oh
jackie 🍓
but there are a lot of reasons for that and none of them have to do with you
jackie 🍓
i want to actually apologize right
jeff 💩
i mean jesus jackie
jeff 💩
im still trying to fucking process what happened
jackie 🍓
yeah that makes two of us
jeff 💩
oh yeah
jeff 💩
hows stuff with shauna
jackie 🍓
bad
jackie 🍓
but were not talking about that right now
jeff 💩
oh
jeff 💩
okay
jackie 🍓
look can i just talk to you about this
jackie 🍓
i feel like i owe it to you to tell you whats been going on
jeff 💩
what?
jeff 💩
i dont want you to owe me anything jackie
jackie 🍓
okay yeah bad wording
jackie 🍓
this isnt about owing
jackie 🍓
i just feel like you deserve an explanation
jackie 🍓
a real one
jackie 🍓
not just a bunch of “sorry”s because those just sound fake
jeff 💩
i meannnn
jeff 💩
i have a feeling im gonna have to say yes either way
jackie 🍓
nononono
jackie 🍓
you dont have to do anything!!!
jeff 💩
jackie
jeff 💩
come on
jackie 🍓
but i mean saying yes would be preferred
jeff 💩
yeah exactly
jackie 🍓
but like of course
jackie 🍓
i dont expect you to
jeff 💩
i mean
jeff 💩
im still mad at you
jackie 🍓
i know
jeff 💩
like really really mad at you
jeff 💩
and also pretty sad too
jackie 🍓
i know and i totally get all of that
jackie 🍓
and you can be mad and sad and totally fucking pissed at me for as long as you want
jackie 🍓
and i wont do anything anymore if you dont want but
jackie 🍓
if we could just call i promise ill explain everything to you
jackie 🍓
okay?
jeff 💩
fine
jackierabbit is calling…
Accept?
yes no
Notes:
lottienat in this fic is kinda the definition of fell first fell harder and i just realized that and i'm obsessed with it...like you have lottie "i've liked nat since I was 14" matthews and nat "oh god I'm in love with her FUCK" scatorccio and im????
also shauna and jackie wallowing in depression and despair is so useless lesbians core, they're so dramatic (i'm so them whenever like a mild inconvenience happens)
also shauna apologizing to ll and jackie apologizing to jeff...baby steps guys baby steps. they fucked up but they're trying!!! claps for them!!
Chapter 14: jackie is sleeping outside tonight. this will end well
Summary:
LOTTIENAT WAR IS OFFICIALLY OVER!!! LETS GO!!! everyone is literally about to combust they're so happy...oh right jackieshauna is still miserable. that's great. lottie to the rescue, shes forcing jackie into bonding time and thank god???? and the jv girls are here too!! melissa is freaking out, like jackie, for the SAME. REASON.
Notes:
guys my finals KICKED. MY. ASS. i am so failing someone pray for me help 😭
but things are getting better!!! ...or like they're on the way
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
fleetwoodlottie to “BUZZ BUZZ BUZZ 🐝”
Saturday, October 13, 10:24 A.M.
lottie ☾
so
lottie ☾
nat and i are dating now
taissa ♔
Wait, WHAT???
van ⛭
REALLY?????
shauna 🌛
FINALLY THANK GOD
⚹ natalie ⚹
smiling and nodding
laura lee ♱
Oh, how wonderful!!!!
misty ♧
Yayyyyy im so happy for you both!!
shauna 🌛
I mean it’s about damn time??
taissa ♔
So we’re almost free?
van ⛭
IM DOING A CELEBRATION DANCE IN WALMART
⚹ natalie ⚹
van why are you in walmart at 10 am on a saturday
van ⛭
wouldnt you like to know weather boy
van ⛭
also hi shauna
shauna 🌛
Hello
van ⛭
didnt know you were still here
van ⛭
thought you left the gc by now
shauna 🌛
No Jackie left
shauna 🌛
Lottie told me
lottie ☾
hola
taissa ♔
Of course she did.
misty ♧
Now what happened?!?
laura lee ♱
Mhm, details!!
shauna 🌛
Please
shauna 🌛
Give me some joy I’m begging
taissa ♔
Stop angsting, I’m begging.
shauna 🌛
No shut up
lottie ☾
ahem ahem
lottie ☾
so at jackies party nat got crazy wasted and when i went to help her out
⚹ natalie ⚹
i made out w her and told her i liked her and then i ran away
⚹ natalie ⚹
like an idiot
shauna 🌛
Because of course you did
taissa ♔
Natalie, oh my God.
misty ♧
So much of that just confused me
⚹ natalie ⚹
yeah it was stupid as fuck i know
van ⛭
and thats called an understatement kids
laura lee ♱
But why would you run away?
lottie ☾
because she thought i didnt like her back and she was embarrassed
shauna 🌛
What the fuck how
taissa ♔
Seriously?
van ⛭
how could anyone ever think lottie didnt like her she was being so obvious
lottie ☾
EXACTLY THATS WHAT I TOLD HER
shauna 🌛
I knew before she did actually
lottie ☾
boy stfu no you didnt
lottie ☾
but I knew before YOU did
shauna 🌛
You knew what
lottie ☾
oop
van ⛭
shauna lottie knows everything its why shes so scary
⚹ natalie ⚹
honestly real
lottie ☾
did you just call me scary
⚹ natalie ⚹
yeah because you are
lottie ☾
sure but you also called me hot
van ⛭
yo????????
⚹ natalie ⚹
you are hot
⚹ natalie ⚹
hey now i can say that without passing out
van ⛭
YO????????
shauna 🌛
Van stop I can hear you through the screen
shauna 🌛
I like just woke up
taissa ♔
Why did you JUST wake up?
shauna 🌛
It’s break?
⚹ natalie ⚹
nah shes bisexual angsting
lottie ☾
thats a thing?
⚹ natalie ⚹
yeah thats what i was doing when we werent talking
lottie ☾
oh dear god 😭
laura lee ♱
So then what happened??
shauna 🌛
Yeah the story
shauna 🌛
Can we get back to that please
taissa ♔
Fine, but we’re not done talking about this.
shauna 🌛
Oh lucky me
laura lee ♱
Taissa, please
laura lee ♱
Give her a little break
⚹ natalie ⚹
right so i was miserable for two days
⚹ natalie ⚹
like i was sobbing every hour and confined to my bed travis can vouch
van ⛭
nah i believe you we dont need him to vouch
van ⛭
(travis told me about all your episodes in graphic detail i was concerned)
shauna 🌛
EPISODES????
shauna 🌛
Natalie what the hell
lottie ☾
and unfortunately i wasnt much better
lottie ☾
i like only left my room to eat and get the mail and then i scurried back in there like a roach so my parents were very concerned
lottie ☾
i wasnt even listening to music which is obviously very weird
⚹ natalie ⚹
lmao i listened to an ungodly amount of mazzy star breakup songs
shauna 🌛
I’ve been listening to Mitski and Boygenius for the past three days
⚹ natalie ⚹
bisexual angsting
⚹ natalie ⚹
what did i tell you
shauna 🌛
Sleep with one eye open Nat
van ⛭
MITSKI and BOYGENIUS????
taissa ♔
Shauna, get help.
shauna 🌛
Taissa you listen to Florence and the machine and Lorde you need help more than I do okay
⚹ natalie ⚹
shauna denial is bad
shauna 🌛
Get fucked Scatorccio
⚹ natalie ⚹
been there done that
shauna 🌛
HELLO????
van ⛭
NATALIE?????
taissa ♔
I’M SORRY, WHAT??
laura lee ♔
CAN WE PLEASE KEEP THIS PG
⚹ natalie ⚹
LOOK SHAUNA SAID IT I DIDNT EVEN DO ANYTHING
lottie ☾
NAT STOP
lottie ☾
um but after a few days of wallowing van abused me into texting nat
shauna 🌛
I mean thank God for Van???
van ⛭
im jesus i know you should be thanking me
laura lee ♱
Vanessa, you are NOT Jesus
⚹ natalie ⚹
yeah so lottie texted me and we talked it out
lottie ☾
(insert screenshot)
misty ♧
Awwwww thats actually really cute
shauna 🌛
Okay but that wasn’t the end of it right
van ⛭
please dont be the end of it
misty ♧
Be as vague as possible please
⚹ natalie ⚹
literally what are you talking about
taissa ♔
Oh my GOD.
lottie ☾
so i invited nat over
shauna 🌛
I don’t like where this is going
⚹ natalie ⚹
and i just started rambling
van ⛭
IDIOT
lottie ☾
she kept saying “are you like SUREEEE you like me” and stupid shit like that
lottie ☾
and i kept telling her “SHUT UP ITS OKAY”
shauna 🌛
You have an absurd amount of patience
⚹ natalie ⚹
and i was freaking out because her parents were literally downstairs and could probably hear us and i looked like a sewer rat
⚹ natalie ⚹
so i KEPT YAPPING
lottie ☾
so i kissed her to get her to stop talking
⚹ natalie ⚹
and then i started losing my mind
lottie ☾
so i kept kissing her to get her to stop
⚹ natalie ⚹
i did stop eventually
lottie ☾
i didnt though
van ⛭
AAAAAAND HALLELUJAH
taissa ♔
That was surprisingly much sweeter than what I was expecting.
laura lee ♱
What were you expecting?
misty ♧
Please dont say it
shauna 🌛
I am so done with every single one of you
van ⛭
text me the details later
⚹ natalie ⚹
deal
lottie ☾
and once that was done
shauna 🌛
“That”
lottie ☾
i dont want to say it
laura lee ♱
Please don’t say it
⚹ natalie ⚹
we literally just kissed you dont have to start praying
lottie ☾
anyway then i asked her if she wanted to be my girlfriend
⚹ natalie ⚹
i almost passed out
⚹ natalie ⚹
and then i was like “YES????? ABSOLUTELY?????”
lottie ☾
and now were here
shauna 🌛
That was so anticlimactic
van ⛭
shut up shipman
van ⛭
im literally jumping for joy
lottie ☾
how is she more happy for us than us
⚹ natalie ⚹
because shes van
van ⛭
HELL YES I AM BROTHER 🤠
shauna 🌛
Why the hell did I read that in a Southern accent
van ⛭
because i used this emoji 🤠
shauna 🌛
Probably
misty ♧
And now youre together!!
⚹ natalie ⚹
and now were together
laura lee ♱
At last
lottie ☾
LAURA LEE OH MY GOD????
taissa ♔
Was she wrong, though?
shauna 🌛
I’ve learned that Laura Lee almost never is
shauna 🌛
So yeah listen to her fuckheads
laura lee ♱
Aww, thank you Shauna
van ⛭
yeah i can only imagine how many times she called you stupid for that pLaN you had there 💀
taissa ♔
Van, can we not?
shauna 🌛
Van I need you to shut up
van ⛭
im sorry are we gonna act like the party WASNT a disaster???
misty ♧
Can we not do this here????
shauna 🌛
Yeah it was stupid but I don’t wanna talk about it
lottie ☾
thats fair
⚹ natalie ⚹
van dont push it
van ⛭
what if i push it
shauna 🌛
Van if you push it I will push you
shauna 🌛
Off the ROOF.
van ⛭
but pushing 🥺
taissa ♔
Stop it.
laura lee ♱
Please???
shauna 🌛
The roof is calling
van ⛭
yknow what laura lee ill stop just because you asked nicely
van ⛭
unlike this ho 😒
shauna 🌛
I’m sorry who are you calling a ho
van ⛭
you
lottie ☾
neither of you is a ho
lottie ☾
can we just leave it at that 😭
travmartinez to nat_the_scat
Saturday, October 13, 11:28 A.M.
daddy issues #2
NATALIE
daddy issues #2
FUCKING
daddy issues #2
SCATORCCIO
nat 🚬
yes travis fucking martinez
daddy issues #2
or should i say SLUTtorccio
nat 🚬
oh dear god
daddy issues #2
WHAT is this i hear about you and LOTTIE MATTHEWS
nat 🚬
did fucking van tell you
daddy issues #2
who else would
nat 🚬
idk lottie i guess
daddy issues #2
nah shes too nice
daddy issues #2
van on the other hand is just the right amount of chaos gremlin
nat 🚬
chaos gremlin is an understatement for whatever the hell that little apple store monkey has going on
nat 🚬
but like what did she tell you
daddy issues #2
yeah well she told me the part where YOURE DATING LOTTIE MATTHEWS????????
nat 🚬
what EXACTLY did van tell you
daddy issues #2
she told me enough dont play with me
nat 🚬
do not listen to anything that girl says she has gingeritis
daddy issues #2
okay so YOU tell me what happened then
nat 🚬
well i texted lottie and she told me she was in love with me
nat 🚬
and she said shes liked me for FOUR FUCKING YEARS
daddy issues #2
FOUR YEARS???
nat 🚬
FOUR YEARS
daddy issues #2
jesus christ how did she last that long
daddy issues #2
i liked you for a couple months and i was about to kms
nat 🚬
and you wonder why i broke up w you
nat 🚬
but anyway then she invited me over to her house
nat 🚬
and we made out again
nat 🚬
and she asked me to be her gf and i said yes so were dating now
daddy issues #2
YESYESYESYESYESYESSSSSS
daddy issues #2
THANK YOU GOD
nat 🚬
the way everyone just acts like war is over whenever i tell them is so weird lmao
daddy issues #2
no bc war IS over like
daddy issues #2
i feel like my prayers have been answered
daddy issues #2
i can be at peace now
nat 🚬
i dont think its possible for anyone to be at peace until jackie and shauna sort their shit out
daddy issues #2
oh right
daddy issues #2
them 😭
nat 🚬
yep exactly
nat 🚬
them
daddy issues #2
whats even going on with them
daddy issues #2
like quick detour because im legitimately curious
nat 🚬
i mean theyre not talking
nat 🚬
jackie has our team gc blocked which is a lil questionable because shes like the CAPTAIN but wtv
nat 🚬
so only shaunas there and jackies doing who knows what
daddy issues #2
probably crying
daddy issues #2
but like thats just my personal opinion
nat 🚬
yeah no shes definitely crying
nat 🚬
and shaunas bisexual angsting
daddy issues #2
oh god not the bisexual angsting
daddy issues #2
thats like basically hell
nat 🚬
she literally didnt believe me when i told her it was a thing
daddy issues #2
tell her it is and i have video proof
daddy issues #2
like five different forms of video proof
nat 🚬
i told her it was real
nat 🚬
also wtf keep that video proof to yourself
daddy issues #2
you sobbing into your chocolate chip pancakes like a little orphan british boy will always be the best thing in my camera roll
nat 🚬
HEY WE AGREED
nat 🚬
WHAT HAPPENS IN IHOP STAYS IN IHOP
daddy issues #2
you never said i couldnt record you stuffing your face with pancakes
nat 🚬
no one will ever see those videos travis
nat 🚬
if someone other than you or me sees those videos i will kill you and then i will kill myself
daddy issues #2
hey at least well be like romeo and juliet
nat 🚬
STOP IT OH MY GOD
nat 🚬
i just gagged
daddy issues #2
ok and
nat 🚬
ANDDDD i literally have a girlfriend
daddy issues #2
and her name is lottie matthews
nat 🚬
AND HER NAME IS LOTTIE MATTHEWS
daddy issues #2
HELLO HEAVEN
nat 🚬
IVE BEEN GIGGLING FOR THE PAST FIFTEEN MINUTES I NEED HELP
daddy issues #2
OH MY GOD NOT GIGGLING
nat 🚬
YES GIGGLING MOTHERFUCKER
daddy issues #2
WHAT IS LOTTIE DOING TO YOUR MIND
nat 🚬
I HAVE LITERALLY NO IDEA
nat 🚬
BUT HONESTLY IM NOT MAD
daddy issues #2
ABSOLUTELY NO ONE IS MAD ABT THIS
daddy issues #2
IM GONNA GO CONGRATULATE HER BRB
nat 🚬
WAIT NO GET BACK HERE
nat 🚬
TRAVIS
fleetwoodlottie to jackierabbit
Saturday, October 13, 12:09 P.M.
lottie 🦌
jackie
jackie 🍓
mhm
lottie 🦌
i just wanted to tell youuuuu
lottie 🦌
nat and i got together!!!
jackie 🍓
WHAT????
jackie 🍓
LOTTIE
jackie 🍓
WHEN
lottie 🦌
HEHEHHEHEHEHEHEH
lottie 🦌
LITERALLY JUST YESTERDAY
jackie 🍓
OH MY FUCK
jackie 🍓
FINALLY
jackie 🍓
i just knocked down my water bottle
lottie 🦌
YOU IDIOT
jackie 🍓
JESUS LOT IM SO HAPPY FOR YOU
lottie 🦌
for real??
jackie 🍓
yeah why wouldnt i be????
lottie 🦌
wait i mean im not insulting you
lottie 🦌
its just that after the party on wednesday i thought you would be officially done with all romantic relationships
jackie 🍓
i meannnnnnnn
jackie 🍓
i had to sit right next to mari flirting with akilah for forty minutes only to get massacred by my best friend
lottie 🦌
NO THATS WHAT IM SAYING
lottie 🦌
IT WAS A TOTAL DISASTER
lottie 🦌
for literally everyone i think like all of us were pretty much suffering
lottie 🦌
except misty and crystal in their stupid little wicked costumes they were having the time of their life
jackie 🍓
some kind of demon just possessed that party i swear
jackie 🍓
BUT ANYWAY THATS ALL OVER NOW
jackie 🍓
YOUVE TAKEN AWAY MY MISERY
lottie 🦌
AWWWWW THANK YOU
lottie 🦌
wait misery
lottie 🦌
why were you in misery
jackie 🍓
come on
jackie 🍓
you know why
lottie 🦌
oh yeah
lottie 🦌
well this just got sad fast
jackie 🍓
nonononono dont be sad!!!
jackie 🍓
you just got a GIRLFRIEND lottie dont let my girlfailing shoot you down
lottie 🦌
jackie heyyy
lottie 🦌
do you wanna hang out???
lottie 🦌
ill bring you starbucks if you want
jackie 🍓
i mean wouldnt you rather hang out with nat??
lottie 🦌
nah vans gonna kidnap her
lottie 🦌
her and travis are gonna abuse her into graphic details
jackie 🍓
why did i even ask
jackie 🍓
i mean you know what sure
jackie 🍓
but can you come over to my house??
lottie 🦌
oh yeah of course!!
lottie 🦌
we can watch your stupid white girl romcoms
jackie 🍓
OOOOOOH YES YES YES
lottie 🦌
ill tell you all about me and nat
lottie 🦌
like all the details
jackie 🍓
PLEASE DO
lottie 🦌
on one condition
jackie 🍓
yeah okay??
lottie 🦌
you have to rant to me about your problems
jackie 🍓
oh god no
jackie 🍓
okay never mind i take it back
lottie 🦌
no
lottie 🦌
no take backs
jackie 🍓
STOP IT
lottie 🦌
CONFIDE IN ME MOTHERFUCKER
that_h0t_sh1t to “IT GIRLZZZZZZ 💅”:
Saturday, October 13, 12:44 P.M.
mari ✨
okay so what the fuck is happening with jackie and shauna
melissa 🌈
mari please
akilah 🍀
mari can we not
gen 🌀
no for real???
misty 💟
Uhhhhhhh what are you talking about
mari ✨
oh so were just gonna act like nothing happened there
mari ✨
they were AT EACH OTHERS THROATS
gen 🌀
shauna PUKED ON THE FLOOR
melissa 🌈
randy walsh KISSED JEFF ON THE MOUTH
misty 💟
Not getting involved in this
misty 💟
Akilah???
akilah 🍀
nope
mari ✨
BUT AKILAH YOU SAW IT
akilah 🍀
its jackie and shaunas business im not gonna just tell you
mari ✨
PLEASEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
gen 🌀
PLEASEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
melissa 🌈
misty what about you
misty 💟
What about me
mari ✨
OOOOOOH YES
melissa 🌈
why dont you tell us
gen 🌀
YES GIVE US THE TEA
misty 💟
Why do i have to give you the tea
melissa 🌈
because youre friends with the tea
akilah 🍀
youre in a group chat with the tea
mari ✨
and akilah wont give us the tea
gen 🌀
because shes MEAN
misty 💟
I dont know…
misty 💟
Jackie and shauna probably wouldnt want me telling you
mari ✨
PLEASE I AM DYING FOR THIS DRAMA
gen 🌀
IM ALWAYS DYING FOR DRAMA
gen 🌀
AND I AM CURRENTLY FUCKING DECEASED
melissa 🌈
we wont like tell anyone if thats what you guys are worried about
misty 💟
Im just not sure
akilah 🍀
i know youre all stupid as shit but can you at least TRY to figure out what happened
akilah 🍀
like werent you at least LOOKING?
melissa 🌈
i walked into the wall like halfway through the party and passed out
gen 🌀
i was too busy mopping shaunas puke off the floor
misty 💟
Mari werent you playing ayesha erotica
mari ✨
yeah thank GOD my wonderful music taste saved the party
melissa 🌈
i was lying unconscious on the couch and my ears were STILL bleeding
akilah 🍀
mari sweetie i love you but that music was awful
gen 🌀
my playlist was so much better smh
misty 💟
So NONE of you has a clue what happened??
mari ✨
i have a theory
melissa 🌈
oh here goes matpat again
mari ✨
what if shauna and jackie are into each other and randy kissing jeff was some kind of elaborate joker scheme that shauna made to get jackie and jeff to break up and jackie broke up w him because shes secretly a lesbian
mari ✨
and jackie was pissed off because she heard about melissa asking shauna out and now theyre not talking and going through gay angst
melissa 🌈
…how are you this stupid
gen 🌀
mari baby how did you come up w that 😭
akilah 🍀
mari oh my god
misty 💟
HOW did you get that right???
melissa 🌈
wait what
mari ✨
I WAS RIGHT??????
gen 🌀
THERES ACTUALLY NO WAY
akilah 🍀
MISTY WHAT HAPPENED TO “WERE NOT SUPPOSED TO TELL THEM”
misty 💟
BUT SHE WAS JUST SO SPOT ON
mari ✨
I AM GOD I AM JESUS I AM PSYCHIC I AM BETTER THAN ALL OF YOU
gen 🌀
I AM HOLLERING MARI THIS IS INSANE
gen 🌀
WAIT I NEED TO THINK ABOUT THIS
akilah 🍀
wait so all that shyt she just said is TRUE
akilah 🍀
oh sweet jesus
melissa 🌈
wait jackie and shauna are into each other
melissa 🌈
like actually???
misty 💟
Oh yeah that surprised me too
misty 💟
Wait
misty 💟
Oh no
mari ✨
MEL WAIT NO
gen 🌀
MEL????
akilah 🍀
melissa oh my god please
akilah 🍀
MELISSA????
misty 💟
Wait why are we freaking out
misty 💟
All she did was just go offline
mari ✨
knowing how obsessed she is with shauna shipman shes probably going to kill herself right now
gen 🌀
goddamnit melissa
akilah 🍀
great so now gens offline too
misty 💟
Just the three of us now
misty 💟
I just love third wheeling
mari ✨
gen i say you should make out with her to get her to feel better
akilah 🍀
mari melissas gonna see that
mari ✨
oh shit right
misty 💟
Mari delete it
misty 💟
But i did mess this up so if melissa does see this im sorry
akilah 🍀
dont sweat it misty
akilah 🍀
just let her cool off a little
mari ✨
yeah she just needs like a couple days and shell be back to her miserable little loser lesbian self
mari ✨
her mood swings arent your fault
misty 💟
Okay
misty 💟
I just hope youre right
akilah 🍀
we are
mari ✨
i hope
akilah 🍀
and either way gen will keep her under control
misty 💟
Yeah that sounds about right
misty 💟
You guys wont tell anyone though right??
akilah 🍀
of course not
akilah 🍀
and mari wont either RIGHT?????
mari ✨
yes??????
mari ✨
i mean jesus i like to yap but im not like evil or something
misty 💟
Yeah totally
misty 💟
Theres nothing wrong with yapping
mari ✨
EXACTLY
mari ✨
see akilah take notes
akilah 🍀
im not gonna stay up until one am on a call w you i have aps to study for
mari ✨
but i love you :(
akilah 🍀
and i love you too but im not getting out of bed at the asscrack of dawn just because you saw a roach crawl behind your dresser
misty 💟
Tired sigh
Saturday, October 13, 5:58 P.M.
gen 🌀
guys nevermind
gen 🌀
melissas alive
melissa 🌈
unfortunately
Notes:
jackieshauna are so dramatic they're so real for that tbh. also everyone being so overjoyed that lottienat is official...they're just like us fr
TRAVIS HELP MEEEEEEE, he's so ooc in this but i just see him as a sassy little shit in my mind and i'm sticking to it
lottie is just such a real one. she just started dating her crush of FOUR YEARS and shes choosing to go help jackie with her pathetic gay heartbreak.
THE JV GIRLS MY LOVES!!! also i do lowkey feel bad for melissa, girl just got CRUSHED
Chapter 15: starting a cult???? maybe kinda sorta???
Summary:
tai starts a new secret society because everything's going downhill and it is CHAOTIC (because of course it is). melissa's a petty ho, laura lee briefly unlocks her inner beast, and shauna and Jjackie talk...kinda. it goes awful. and mari, our "savior", puts her single functioning braincell to work and makes a new plan!!
Notes:
y'all...i have my math finals on WEDNESDAY PRAY FOR ME. PLEASE PRAY FOR ME I NEED ALL THE HELP I CAN GET.
and just like that, were finally getting somewhere!!!
this chapter was probably one of the most fun to write, all these guys together are just so funny to me and i hope its the same for you too!!
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
taiturner created “Jackie & Shauna Planning Groupchat”
taiturner has added vantheman, fleetwoodlottie, nat_the_scat, africangrey, and jesuslovesyou to the conversation
Monday, October 15, 4:26 P.M.
vans girlfriend????
Guys, this is the group chat where we’re going to try and get Jackie and Shauna to talk again.
spawn from hell (loml 💕)
que
vans girlfriend????
You knew this was coming.
nat 🚬
your planning ass???
nat 🚬
damn right i knew it was coming
nat 🚬
youre not slick taissa turner
spawn from hell (loml 💕)
yeah okay so im assuming this is about practice today???
redhead disease 🧡
oh my GOD it was a DISASTER
jesus freak
If they don’t figure it out soon, we might lose all our games
vans girlfriend????
If they don’t figure it out soon, we might lose NATIONALS.
misty quigley (send help)
Really?
misty quigley (send help)
Thats how bad its getting??
nat 🚬
no THATS how bad its getting
nat 🚬
misty trust me it was awful
misty quigley (send help)
I mean i know
misty quigley (send help)
I was there
jesus freak
But still!
jesus freak
This definitely is a problem
vans girlfriend????
My point exactly.
vans girlfriend????
That’s why we need a plan.
redhead disease 🧡
mhm and whats the plan
vans girlfriend????
I don’t HAVE a plan yet.
vans girlfriend????
That’s why I’m asking all of you.
nat 🚬
wait can i add travis to here
spawn from hell (loml 💕)
why are we adding travis
nat 🚬
he was there at the party
nat 🚬
he saw it happen
nat 🚬
and plus he might be able to help
redhead disease 🧡
and hes a g
redhead disease 🧡
you can add him nat
vans girlfriend????
Yeah, I guess so.
nat_the_scat has added travmartinez to the conversation
daddy issues #2
hello
redhead disease 🧡
wsp travis
daddy issues #2
oh hi van
daddy issues #2
hi lottie
spawn from hell (loml 💕)
hey
daddy issues #2
so why am i here
nat 🚬
were fixing the jackie and shauna situation
daddy issues #2
oh thank jesus
spawn from hell (loml 💕)
but we dont exactly have a plan yet
daddy issues #2
so we need a plan
vans girlfriend????
Yes, we do.
nat 🚬
and we need all the help possible to make one
jesus freak
Travis, did you see soccer practice today?
daddy issues #2
you mean did i see jackie and shauna trying to take each other out and ruining the match at every chance they got
spawn from hell (loml 💕)
thats a yes
redhead disease 🧡
theyre gonna fuck up the whole team with their petty fighting
nat 🚬
we need all the help we can get atp
vans girlfriend????
Yes, which brings me to my next idea.
vans girlfriend????
Misty?
misty quigley (send help)
Mhm??
vans girlfriend????
Can you add the rest of the team?
misty quigley (send help)
What do you mean
nat 🚬
she means the jv girls
spawn from hell (loml 💕)
youre in their gc right?
misty quigley (send help)
Ohhhhhh yeah i can add them!!
redhead disease 🧡
well in that case
vantheman changed the group chat title to “the fruit bowl ✨🍒🍎🍍🥝🫐 ✨”
vans girlfriend????
Would it kill you to be serious just ONCE?
redhead disease 🧡
normally?? no
redhead disease 🧡
right now?? Yeah
nat 🚬
plus i mean it fits
spawn from hell (loml 💕)
well it fits for most of us
spawn from hell (loml 💕)
i think
daddy issues #2
lmao lottie ive spent so much time listening to nat yap about you that im basically bisexual by now
nat 🚬
SHHHHH SHHHHH TRAVIS DONT TELL HER THAT
spawn from hell (loml 💕)
i just gained so much respect for you
redhead disease 🧡
see i told you travis was a g
jesus freak
Good to know they were talking about each other to everyone and it wasnt just me
vans girlfriend????
Let’s get back on track.
vans girlfriend????
Misty, can you go get the JV girls??
misty quigley (send help)
Welllllll i can try
misty quigley (send help)
But im not sure theyll all say yes
vans girlfriend????
Why wouldn’t they
nat 🚬
ohhhhhhhhhh i know why
spawn from hell (loml 💕)
i know why too
daddy issues #2
okay so i dont know why??
jesus freak
I also don’t know why
redhead disease 🧡
its melissa isnt it
misty quigley (send help)
Shes like super super in love with shauna so i feel like trying to get her with jackie isnt something melissa will want to do
nat 🚬
okay but we need her on board
nat 🚬
just try it
spawn from hell (loml 💕)
make sure she agrees
spawn from hell (loml 💕)
but dont like harass her or anything
redhead disease 🧡
no harass her
redhead disease 🧡
thats the best way to do it
daddy issues #2
yeah i agree with van
nat 🚬
i am so so so concerned for both of you
vans girlfriend????
No harassing, please.
vans girlfriend????
Misty, just do whatever it takes to get them to join.
misty quigley (send help)
Got it!!
africangrey to “IT GIRLZZZZZZ 💅”
Monday, October 15, 4:34 P.M.
misty 💟
Guys taissa told me to add you to our new group chat
misty 💟
Were trying to make a plan to get jackie and shauna back together
gen 🌀
THEY WERE TOGETHER?????
misty 💟
No i read the text wrong
mari ✨
tbh i think they kinda were
mari ✨
but like eMoTiOnAlLy
mari ✨
like some kinda secret third thing
misty 💟
…Mari what
akilah 🍀
dont worry about her shes always saying stupid shit
gen 🌀
wait so taissa wants our help getting jackie and shauna together???
misty 💟
Thats right
melissa 🌈
what if i dont want to get jackie and shauna together
melissa 🌈
what if thats like the last thing i want
gen 🌀
melissa please
misty 💟
Actually i dont know the answer to that
misty 💟
Tai just told me to do whatever it takes to get you guys on board
akilah 🍀
i mean im on board already
akilah 🍀
their whole fight was honestly insane so if i can help i want to
mari ✨
if akilahs down im down
gen 🌀
im up for it too
gen 🌀
i want the drama
misty 💟
Thats great!
misty 💟
Melissa?
melissa 🌈
theres no way youre stupid enough to think ill say yes to this
akilah 🍀
no i fully expect you to do it
melissa 🌈
uh huh how
gen 🌀
mariiiii 😈
mari ✨
MELISSA IF YOU DONT GET IN ON THIS ACTION I WILL STEAL ALL YOUR HATS
mari ✨
AND BURN THEM
misty 💟
OH NO NOT THE HATS
melissa 🌈
NO YOU WOULDNT
mari ✨
YES I WOULD HO
melissa 🌈
OKAY OKAY FINE ILL DO IT
melissa 🌈
JUST LEAVE MY HATS ALONE
gen 🌀
MISTY YOUVE GOT A GREEN LIGHT
gen 🌀
ADD US BEFORE MELISSA CHANGES HER MIND
akilah 🍀
please
gen 🌀
mhm please
misty 💟
You got it!
africangrey added melissa.hatgirl, that_h0t_sh1t, flowergirlakilah, and thegenesis to “the fruit bowl ✨🍒🍎🍍🥝🫐 ✨”
Monday, October 15, 4:57 P.M.
Misty
There you go taissa!!!
(917)-876-3241
yo who dis
Van 💗
who DIS???
(917)-876-3241
mari
Van 💗
AYYYYYYYY
Van 💗
IM VAN
(917)-876-3241
OH HIIIIIIIIIII
(424)-924-1672
helllooooooooo
(424)-924-1672
this is gen
Tai
Hello, this is Taissa.
(917)-543-7596
hi taissa!!
(917)-543-7596
im akilah
(917)-543-7596
the other number is melissa
Tai
Okay, got it.
you added Mari, Akilah, Gen, and Melissa to your contacts
Lottie
heyyyyy
Lottie
im lottie
Natalie
im nat
Natalie
this is travis
Travis
hola
Laura Lee
And I’m Laura Lee!!
Gen
okay adding you all to my contacts
Melissa
wheres shauna
Tai
Shauna’s not here.
Tai
I made a group chat without her and Jackie so that we could all make a plan.
Melissa
oh
Mari
mel did you hear what misty said at ALL
Akilah
she SAID that we were trying to plot on jackie and shauna
Melissa
yeah
Melissa
i thought that meant jackie and shauna would be here
Tai
Well, they’re not.
Melissa
can you add them
Van 💗
NO
Tai
We really shouldn’t do that.
Lottie
melissa i need you to listen to me
Lottie
if we were to put jackieandshauna in a gc together it would be like a radioactive bomb going off
Natalie
hell would break loose
Travis
we would all be nuked
Gen
are the three of you like a trio
Lottie
no
Travis
i guess now we are
Laura Lee
Let’s get back on track
Misty
The plan!
Tai
Yes, the plan.
Natalie
mhm mhm the plan
Natalie
so what is it
Lottie
yeah were still missing that little bit of info
Akilah
sorry we DONT HAVE A PLAN???
Tai
No, we need your help to make the plan.
Misty
Im adding crystal
Travis
whos crystal
Natalie
her girlfriend
Travis
great so MISTY QUIGLEY got a girlfriend before me
Tai
You sound like Jackie.
Lottie
lmao
Travis
SHUT UP MR STEAL YO GIRL
Mari
STEAL YO GIRL???????
Lottie
nats the girl
Natalie
im the girl
Gen
IM WHEEZING
africangrey added crystalz_curtain_call to “the fruit bowl ✨🍒🍎🍍🥝🫐 ✨”
(424)-494-5121
Oh hi guys!!!!
you added Crystal to your contacts
Tai
Hello, Crystal.
Tai
Has Misty caught you up on what’s going on?
Crystal
Shes told me enough yeah
Crystal
Making a plan to get jackie and shauna to make up?
Natalie
and make out
Melissa
no
Tai
Be quiet, Natalie.
Tai
But yes, that’s pretty much what we’re doing.
Crystal
So whats the plan?
Akilah
we dont fucking have one yet
Lottie
were working on it
Melissa
how do we all help??
Tai
We need your help for the backup plan.
Gen
okay but whats the first plan???
Travis
we have to figure the first plan out to come up with the backup plan
Mari
vro 💀
Van 💗
I HAVE ONE I HAVE ONE!!!!
Lottie
AAAAAAND HALLELUJAH
Tai
What’s the plan, Van?
Tai
Ew that rhymed
Van 💗
we need laura lee
Laura Lee
Me?
Natalie
oh dear god no
Travis
hasnt laura lee been caught up in enough plans
Van 💗
NONONONONO THIS ONES GOOD
Akilah
why do i not trust that
Tai
Because she’s probably not right.
Mari
LET HER COOK
Van 💗
thank you mari
Van 💗
nat and tai, you usually yell at shauna right??
Natalie
yep pretty much
Tai
Sounds about right.
Van 💗
and ll, youre usually calm and composed with her right????
Laura Lee
Yes!
Travis
oh my fuck ll you need to yell at her
Natalie
he gets it
Tai
It’s the only foolproof solution.
Laura Lee
I’d rather not yell at her, please and thank you
Melissa
i cry when people yell at me
Lottie
shauna always tells people to kill themselves BUT she never yells at ll
Van 💗
so my plan is that maybe if ll DOES yell at her shauna will see that shes being stupid and be peer pressured to fix this shit
Akilah
thats actually kinda smart
Gen
im just nodding bc its the only plan weve got
Laura Lee
So the plan is for me to yell at her?
Tai
Yeah, the plan is for you to yell at her.
Laura Lee
But I don’t want to
Misty
But laura lee you have to
Crystal
For the cause!
Travis
its definitely worth a shot
Tai
Laura Lee, just do it.
Laura Lee
I DON’T KNOW IF I CAN DO IT
Tai
JUST DO IT
Lottie
DO IT
Mari
DO IT
Gen
DO IT
Van 💗
DO IT
Natalie
DO IT
Akilah
DO IT
Travis
DO IT
Misty
DO IT
Crystal
DO IT
Melissa
DO IT
Tai
SORRY, DID WE JUST BECOME A CULT?
Travis
lottie started it not us
Natalie
lottie cult leader era?
Van 💗
id join that cult
Lottie
LAURA LEE GO GO GO GO GO
Laura Lee
OKAY SHIT I’M GOING
Melissa
have i ever heard her curse before????
jesuslovesyou to ss.shipman
Monday, October 15, 5:23 P.M.
laura lee ♱
Hello Shauna
shauna 🌛
Hello
laura lee ♱
Have you talked to Jackie yet?
shauna 🌛
No
laura lee ♱
Why not?
shauna 🌛
I don’t want to talk to her
laura lee ♱
But why don’t you?
laura lee ♱
I’m sure she’s so sad now
shauna 🌛
Oh yeah I’m sure she’s so sad
shauna 🌛
Probably found a whole new best friend like the brat she is
laura lee ♱
HEY
laura lee ♱
THAT’S NOT NICE
shauna 🌛
Well you know what
shauna 🌛
I don’t fucking care about any of this anymore
laura lee ♱
WELL
laura lee ♱
YOU’RE BEING A NASTY ASSHOLE
shauna 🌛
Excuse me
laura lee ♱
YOU HEARD ME
laura lee ♱
BITCH
shauna 🌛
What is happening right now
laura lee ♱
YOU’RE ACTING LIKE A DICK
laura lee ♱
YOU DON’T HAVE TO DATE HER OR ANYTHING BUT JUST TALK TO HER FOR GOD’S SAKE
laura lee ♱
BOTH OF YOU ARE HURTING AND NEITHER OF YOU DESERVE IT
laura lee ♱
And all this cursing made me feel very peculiar
laura lee ♱
I think I might have enjoyed it
shauna 🌛
Um
shauna 🌛
Congrats I guess?
laura lee ♱
DUMB BITCH
laura lee ♱
I AM NOT HERE TO FOOL AROUND
laura lee ♱
I AM ANGRY
laura lee ♱
I AM VERY VERY ANGRY
shauna 🌛
WHY ARE YOU ANGRY????
laura lee ♱
BECAUSE YOU’RE MY FRIEND AND I CARE ABOUT YOU
laura lee ♱
NOW GO TEXT HER
laura lee ♱
GOGOGOGOGOGOGO
shauna 🌛
OH MY FUCKING GOD OKAY????
ss.shipman to jackierabbit
Monday, October 15, 5:37 P.M.
SHAUNA ❤
What
jackie 🍓
what
SHAUNA ❤
What do you want
jackie 🍓
nothing
SHAUNA ❤
Really?
SHAUNA ❤
Nothing?
jackie 🍓
yeah nothing
jackie 🍓
i dont fucking want to talk to you shauna
SHAUNA ❤
Jackie can you stop being fucking petty for one second
jackie 🍓
sorry PETTY??
jackie 🍓
you plotted to end my relationship, lied to me, and BROKE UP WITH ME at my OWN PARTY and youre calling me PETTY for being mad about it????
SHAUNA ❤
Nononono wait
SHAUNA ❤
I’m sorry I didn’t mean that it’s just
SHAUNA ❤
That’s not what that was
jackie 🍓
oh okay so what the fuck was it
SHAUNA ❤
It’s hard to explain
jackie 🍓
okay well dont fucking bother
jackie 🍓
i dont even wanna hear it
SHAUNA ❤
Can we please just talk for a second?
jackie 🍓
i dont want to talk to you shauna
SHAUNA ❤
Please?
SHAUNA ❤
I wanna explain what happened
jackie 🍓
oh no i know what happened
SHAUNA ❤
Look I know it looked awful but I had reasons
jackie 🍓
i dont want to hear your reasons
jackie 🍓
keep them to yourself
jackie 🍓
you hate me dont you??
jackie 🍓
thats what you told me at the party
SHAUNA ❤
Jackie you know I didn’t really mean that
jackie 🍓
i dont care if you meant it
jackie 🍓
go away shauna
jackierabbit to “girlkissers official gc”
Monday, October 15, 5:46 P.M.
jackie 🍓
I FUCKING RUINED IT
jackie 🍓
(insert screenshot)
taissa ⚽
It’s okay, Jackie.
lottie 🦌
she had it coming
van 🔥
now that was a little bit harsh
jackie 🍓
A LITTLE BIT????
jackie 🍓
IT FELT SO GOOD IN THE MOMENT BUT NOW I FEEL FUCKING AWFUL
jackie 🍓
WHAT IF I MADE HER CRY
taissa ⚽
Well, she might have had it coming, but you should apologize soon.
lottie 🦌
i need an advil
van 🔥
why didnt you let her explain herself before you told her to go fuck herself??
jackie 🍓
I DONT KNOW I WAS ANGRY
jackie 🍓
I WASNT EVEN ANRGY I WAS JUST SO FUCKING HURT
van 🔥
thats rough buddy
taissa ⚽
Van, please stop.
lottie 🦌
i need a million advils
fleetwoodlottie to “the fruit bowl ✨🍒🍎🍍🥝🫐 ✨”
Monday, October 15, 5:49 P.M.
Lottie
THE PLAN WAS A BUST
Laura Lee
I RUINED IT I RUINED IT SO BAD
Laura Lee
(insert screenshot)
Natalie
YOU cursed???
Natalie
oh my god
Tai
No, Laura Lee, you didn’t ruin it.
Laura Lee
I did!!!
Laura Lee
Lottie just said the plan was a bust!!!
Lottie
no but that was bc of jackie and shauna not you
Tai
You did your job perfectly, Laura Lee.
Laura Lee
But it didn’t work
Lottie
ll did you get shauna to text her???
Laura Lee
Yes???
Tai
Then you did this right!
Crystal
Wait it worked?
Akilah
partially?
Mari
so shauna did at least text her
Van 💗
(insert screenshot)
Van 💗
(insert screenshot)
Tai
So, yeah, it went like that
Misty
SHE STILL HAS SHAUNA SAVED WITH A HEART 💔
Melissa
i would have sobbed omd
Travis
MY JAW IS ON THE FUCKING FLOOR
Travis
JACKIE???
Natalie
travis doesnt know how vicious the toxic girlbestfriendship gets
Natalie
f in the chat for travis
Lottie
f
Gen
f
Melissa
f
Mari
f
Van 💗
f
Tai
F.
Travis
IS THIS A TRAVIS HATE CLUB OR SOMETHING
Travis
BECAUSE WHAT THE FUCK
Tai
Anyway, back on track.
Lottie
didnt think shed be that mean to shauna tho
Natalie
i think god is real
Laura Lee
God is real though?
Tai
I can debunk that.
Natalie
kys
Van 💗
its time for phase two
Misty
Backup plan??
Tai
Backup plan.
Crystal
Thats us!!
Akilah
damn fucking right thats us
Mari
okay yall put your thinking brains on
Travis
what are we going for here
Tai
We’re going for a foolproof solution to get Jackie and Shauna to talk to each other.
Akilah
with minimal physical contact
Natalie
nah i want them to fight
Lottie
physical contact is fine
Lottie
just not the fighting kind if ykwim
Gen
i just gagged
Melissa
thats the asexual in you
Tai
As long as we’re far away and keep them soundproofed, then that’s fine too.
Van 💗
OH HELLLLL YEAHHHAHAHAHFIDIH
Travis
yeah im with gen
Travis
i just got sick to my stomach
Natalie
i hope you puke
Mari
WAIITTTTTTTTT
Mari
I HAVE A BACKUP PLAN
Crystal
Why am i nervous??
Akilah
because its mari
Tai
Does it fit the criteria, Mari?
Natalie
not tai treating this like a school project
Tai
Not Natalie taking every opportunity to make fun of me.
Natalie
cope
Tai
Mari, answer the question.
Mari
if the criteria is peer pressures them into talking, stops them from beating each other up, and gives them privacy to fuck????
Mari
yeah it fits
Gen
oh good lord
Travis
we r unaliving tonight!!
Lottie
guys shhhh
Lottie
mari whats the plan???
Melissa
yeah tell us
Akilah
so youre invested now??
Melissa
against my will
Tai
Do we need roles???
Natalie
we can do that later
Mari
basically were gonna need a really big house
Mari
and a REALLLLLYYY big closet
Notes:
EVERYONE TOGETHER WHO CHEERED?????
i love the planning gc sm, trust me its gonna be so much fun
laura lee cursing help me i love her. the way she said BITCH and shauna was like "ohhhhh shiiiiiiiiitttt" I mean it had the desired effect????
jackie and shauna...... god I mean shauna did have it coming with all the shit she pulled but even IM losing it like can we just TALK????
mari's new plan...why does all she told us sound weirdly menacing
Chapter 16: jackieshauna's adventures in lottieland
Summary:
the plan is revealed and OHHHHHH boy is it messy, but its probably going to work so our little gay squad sets it into motion and it works and OH BOY ANOTHER PATY??? WHO WOULDVE GUESSED????? and then everything miraculously works out in their favor (and in jackie and shaunas, somehow) and then--i kinda left you on a sweet little cliffhanger. im not sorry. featuring minor genlissa, seven minutes in heaven, gaslighting, and gays!! youre all welcome.
Notes:
idk who predicted another party but YOU WON. YOU GOT IT. HERES YOUR OTHER PARTY MY LAD.
also the jackieshauna wait is officially over!! ik this might feel a little rushed but i did feel like they wouldnt really be able to stay too mad at each other for long (unless one of them happened to sleep outside and freeze) so this is that. i hope i made the final product worth your while!!
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
travmartinez to “the fruit bowl ✨🍒🍎🍍🥝🫐 ✨”
Wednesday, October 17, 12:09 P.M.
Travis
soooooo its been two days
Travis
do we have a plan yet
Tai
Only Mari’s ominous “closet” plan.
Mari
taissa youre literally not allowed to talk
Mari
you end every sentence with a period and it scares me
Tai
Boo.
Mari
AHGFHGOHJKDHGUHDKLJSI
Lottie
so mari why dont you tell us what the plan is
Van 💗
mari is the plan to throw another party and then lock them in a closet until they talk it out
Tai
Imagine if that’s actually the plan.
Mari
actually yes it is
Misty
Oh i thought the plan was to kill them and lock their bodies in the closet!!
Melissa
okay so no killing please
Natalie
no lets keep the killing as a last resort
Melissa
no the killing isnt happening
Natalie
:)
Crystal
We don’t want them to know were plotting right???
Van 💗
we do NOT want them knowing
Lottie
jackie will sob and shauna will cut us up into tiny pieces and feed us to the rabbits in her backyard
Tai
Rabbits??
Gen
melissa would probably be into that
Melissa
CAN YOU SHUT UP
Travis
giggles
Lottie
GIGGLES???
Travis
yes
Van 💗
you would disgrace your father
Travis
i disgrace my father every day
Lottie
thats why hes friends with nat
Natalie
hell fucking yeah it is
Tai
Mari?
Mari
yuh
Tai
Let’s get to work on the plan.
Mari
okay
Mari
who has the biggest house here
Lottie
thats probably me
Mari
okay so we have a party this weekend at lotties house
Tai
More parties???
Lottie
THIS WEEKEND????
Mari
maybe not THIS weekend but sometime soon before it gets worse
Mari
and yes because a party is the only way to get them in the same house and in a closet without making it obvious that were up to smth
Melissa
mari being smart
Melissa
this is a miracle
Tai
Well, how do we get them to come if the other is going too?
Van 💗
yeah bc jackies gonna piss herself if she sees shauna there and shauna will hunt us down
Natalie
easy
Natalie
we just dont tell them
Travis
okay well what if we dont want to
Laura Lee
Travis, you don’t even talk to Jackie and Shauna
Travis
NO ive talked to them a couple times
Tai
A couple times as in once?
Travis
yknow taissa youre a lot more fun over text than you are in person
Tai
I’m gonna pretend I didn’t hear that.
Natalie
trav it doesnt matter if you dont want to you have to
Natalie
i know that because my fucking girlfriend is forcing me to do ts against my will
Tai
Okay, now be quiet, Nat.
Melissa
Sorry GIRLFRIEND???
Lottie
THATS MEEEEE
Mari
STOP I JUST SQUEALED
Crystal
Ohhhh im so happy for you two!!
Akilah
OMG THATS SO AMAZING WHAT?????
Natalie
yeah it finally happened
Tai
Even if it fucking took FOREVER.
Travis
it really did
Lottie
jackie and shauna probably talk shit abt us
Natalie
well now theyre not talking shit because theyre not even talking
Crystal
Lottie now youve got me wondering if jackie and shauna talked shit about me and misty
Misty
We like kpop
Misty
They probably do
Misty
Or like
Misty
Did????
Van 💗
misty you just put me through pain
Mari
DOUBLE HOMICIDE
Gen
TRIPLE HOMICIDE
Tai
THE PLAN, REMEMBER??
Crystal
Okay so say we have a party and we DO get jackie and shauna to come
Crystal
How do we get them in a closet?
Gen
we could have someone bring it up as a game like super innocently
Akilah
oh GOD not fucking seven minutes in heaven
Lottie
OH GOD THAT GAME MAKES ME NAUSEOUS
Natalie
HELP 😭
Travis
well we should send someone else in there first so it doesnt seem suspicious
Van 💗
ME AND TAI VOLUNTEER
Tai
NO WE DO NOT
Laura Lee
If this doesn’t work I’ll be forced to say cuss words again
Gen
“cuss words” pls 💀
fleetwoodlottie to “BUZZ BUZZ BUZZ 🐝”
Wednesday, October 17, 2:22 P.M.
lottie ☾
okay soooo im having a party at my house this saturday
lottie ☾
youre all coming dont play w me
⚹ natalie ⚹
ugh i cant believe youre making me go
⚹ natalie ⚹
i had sooooo many plans
van ⛭
right like who wants to go to a big ass party in lotties big ass house?
laura lee ♱
Oh I’d love to!!
taissa ♔
I can drive you, if you need, Laura Lee.
laura lee ♱
Yes please, thank you
misty ♧
Of course ill come!!
misty ♧
Im probably gonna need to find an outfit though
⚹ natalie ⚹
wear that teal dress with the clouds on it and your brown cardigan
lottie ☾
OOOOOOH YES
van ⛭
im just wearing my fucking overalls bro idc
shauna 🌛
Do I have to go?
laura lee ♱
Lottie said we were all going to go
misty ♧
Yeah and we should listen to her!!
laura lee ♱
Yes 😀
shauna 🌛
I don’t really want to go though
lottie ☾
nuh uh i said youre going
van ⛭
shauna please you have to
shauna 🌛
Why it’s not like it’s gonna change anything
⚹ natalie ⚹
loud incorrect buzzer
laura lee ♱
It wouldn’t be as fun if you weren’t there
taissa ♔
Right, it would only be fun if we’re all together.
shauna 🌛
Is Jackie coming
lottie ☾
nah she said she had something going on with her family this weekend
⚹ natalie ⚹
lmfao why would we force you guys into the same party again?
van ⛭
right because that went so well last time?
taissa ♔
Besides, it’s about time you do something fun instead of moping around your room, wallowing in your own stupidity.
shauna 🌛
Okay fine
shauna 🌛
I’ll go I guess
misty ♧
But we need certainty
shauna 🌛
Why?
misty ♧
Uhhhhhhhh because
laura lee ♱
We need the group together
misty ♧
Yeah and thats 10000000000% the only reason
laura lee ♱
We promise
shauna 🌛
All right I will certainly be there
van ⛭
wonderful
⚹ natalie ⚹
im picking you up at nine so make sure youre out of the house by then
shauna 🌛
Duly noted
fleetwoodlottie to “girlkissers official gc”
Wednesday, October 17, 2:31 P.M.
lottie 🦌
jackieeeeeeeeee
jackie 🍓
yeeeeeeeeeees??
lottie 🦌
hows your misery going
jackie 🍓
its still going
lottie 🦌
well i have the perfect cure for that
lottie 🦌
come to my party this saturday at my house
lottie 🦌
and wear your dress with the strawberries on it
jackie 🍓
is this like a birthday thing
van 🔥
yeah its for mari
jackie 🍓
isnt maris birthday in august
taissa ⚽
Well, it’s not technically for Mari’s BIRTHDAY, but it is a party for Mari.
taissa ⚽
She just insisted we have a party for her for some reason.
van 🔥
yeah you know mari
van 🔥
just like so humble right 😆😆
jackie 🍓
why did you say it was for her birthday tho
van 🔥
got confused
van 🔥
it happens
jackie 🍓
who else is coming
lottie 🦌
the four of us, nat misty and ll, the jv girls, crystal and travis, maybe a couple others
lottie 🦌
not shauna if you were thinking that
jackie 🍓
i wasnt
van 🔥
uh huh 🧍
jackie 🍓
oh shut up vanessa
lottie 🦌
sooooo are you coming???
jackie 🍓
you know what sure
jackie 🍓
sounds pretty fun
van 🔥
ill pick you up at 9:30
jackie 🍓
damn at least give me enough time to pick out a hot outfit
lottie 🦌
strawberry dress just trust me
vantheman to “the fruit bowl ✨🍒🍎🍍🥝🫐 ✨”
Wednesday, October 17, 2:44 P.M.
Van 💗
HOOOOOOOOOOO LORDY BE WE DID IT
Laura Lee
I hated that
Laura Lee
I hated that so much
Natalie
theyre gonna be thanking us in a week dw ll
Travis
that was fast????
Tai
Yeah, surprisingly, they didn’t put up much of a fight.
Mari
FUCK YEAHHHHHHHH
Melissa
insert clapping noise
Akilah
melissa im surprised youre so on board with this
Tai
I am too, honestly.
Melissa
what why is that so surprising
Gen
because its extremely unexpected that youre not clawing at the walls and sobbing at the thought of shauna kissing another blonde girl
Melissa
gen shut the fuck up
Van 💗
FIGHT FIGHT FIGHT
Lottie
stop that
Laura Lee
I am so not proud of myself
Tai
Laura Lee, relax, it’s fine.
Travis
yeah we all lie sometimes
Natalie
she did pretty well
Van 💗
WELL MY ASS SHE ALMOST BLEW OUR COVER
Gen
WHAT???
Misty
DONT YELL AT HER
Laura Lee
DON’T YELL AT ME PLEASE
Van 💗
honestly ll i am very thankful you didnt blurt out our whole plan
Laura Lee
I ALMOST said it
Laura Lee
I feel so awful for lying to her
Misty
Yeah please dont make us do this again :)
Tai
No promises.
Laura Lee
What.
Crystal
Either way its done
Crystal
Now we just have to wait until the party
ss.shipman to taiturner
Saturday, October 20, 10:00 P.M.
shauna 🌛
Are you fucking serious??
taissa ♔
What?
shauna 🌛
You TOLD me Jackie WASN’T going to be at this party
shauna 🌛
I JUST SAW HER
taissa ♔
I lied, get over it.
shauna 🌛
I’m leaving
shauna 🌛
I don’t care HOW big Lottie’s house is
taissa ♔
No, you’re not.
shauna 🌛
You’re a fucking neanderthal Taissa Turner
taissa ♔
Why did you sit down on the couch next to me just to text that?
shauna 🌛
I hate you
taissa ♔
So you’re staying?
shauna 🌛
To spite you
taissa ♔
Excellent.
jackierabbit to fleetwoodlottie
Saturday, October 20, 10:00 P.M.
jackie 🍓
WHAT THE FUCK LOTTIE????
jackie 🍓
YOU LITTLE FUCKING LIAR
lottie 🦌
i didnt know shauna was gonna be here
jackie 🍓
MY ASS????
jackie 🍓
WHAT ARE YOU PLANNING
lottie 🦌
planning what do you mean planning
lottie 🦌
im not planning anything
jackie 🍓
I HOPE YOU FALL DOWN THE STAIRS
jackierabbit to “girlkissers official gc”
Saturday, October 20, 10:30 P.M.
jackie 🍓
YOU DIRTY LITTLE SHITS
van 🔥
whatever are you talking about
taissa ⚽
I haven’t the slightest idea.
lottie 🦌
i know right?
jackie 🍓
THATS your plan?????
jackie 🍓
SEVEN MINUTES IN HEAVEN????
jackie 🍓
are we TWELVE????
jackie 🍓
ANSWER ME YOU FUCKERS
ss.shipman to “BUZZ BUZZ BUZZ 🐝”
Saturday, October 20, 10:34 P.M.
shauna 🌛
I hope you all know that I’m leaving this party dead set on killing each and every one of you
laura lee ♱
NO SHAUNA I'M SO SORRY I’M SO SORRY
lottie ☾
DROP YOUR DAMN PHONES ALL OF YOU
lottie ☾
YOURE AT A PARTY
laura lee ♱
PLEASE DON’T BE MAD I’M SORRY I CUSSED AT YOU THE OTHER DAY
shauna 🌛
No I’m murdering all of you I’m not even joking
⚹ natalie ⚹
cant really kill us from inside a closet tho can you
van ⛭
exactly like wont yall be a little distracteeeeeedddd
shauna 🌛
I get to choose who goes next right
taissa ♔
Yes.
shauna 🌛
Misty
misty ♧
Yeah?
shauna 🌛
I hope you REALLY like Crystal
misty ♧
WAIT NONONONONONO IM NOT READY
⚹ natalie ⚹
WAIT YES LMAOOOOOOO
lottie ☾
I MEAN THATS ONE WAY TO DO IT
jackierabbit to ss.shipman
Saturday, October 20, 10:39 P.M.
jackie 🍓
shauna text me
jackie 🍓
DONT LOOK AT ME LIKE THAT
jackie 🍓
theyre probably eavesdropping
SHAUNA ❤
Oh okay
jackie 🍓
i uh wanted to say im sorry about when you texted me the other day
jackie 🍓
i was mad at you obviously but i was really mean to you
jackie 🍓
i didnt mean it either
jackie 🍓
i really miss you
SHAUNA ❤
I really miss you too
SHAUNA ❤
And it’s totally fine you don’t have to apologize
SHAUNA ❤
I deserved it
SHAUNA ❤
STOP TYPING
SHAUNA ❤
It’s true don’t try to tell me it isn’t
jackie 🍓
ok fine lol
jackie 🍓
you deserved it
jackie 🍓
OW THAT HURT
jackie 🍓
im not a punching bag
SHAUNA ❤
Lol sorry
SHAUNA ❤
I kinda missed this
jackie 🍓
kinda???
SHAUNA ❤
OkayIreallymissedthis
jackie 🍓
thats better
jackie 🍓
i cried over this
SHAUNA ❤
Wait you did?
jackie 🍓
yeah of course i did
jackie 🍓
and before you ask why im gonna tell you
SHAUNA ❤
Okay please do
jackie 🍓
its because im a lesbian and i am very very very very very very VERY in love with you
jackie 🍓
and i know that this might honestly make so many things worse but i think we should just be totally honest and thats this
jackie 🍓
i was scared to break up with jeff because i felt like you didnt like me back and i was scared of ruining everything
jackie 🍓
like there was stuff with you and with my parents and i felt like actually coming out or doing something about how much i liked you would fuck everything up
jackie 🍓
and even though i might be doing the same thing right now i just really want you to know
SHAUNA ❤
Oh
jackie 🍓
SAY SOMETHING
SHAUNA ❤
Okay well I guess it’s my turn to say that I’m in love with you
SHAUNA ❤
Like properly
SHAUNA ❤
Not the casual “I love you bestie” way
SHAUNA ❤
I mean the “I tried to break you and Jeff up because I was so desperately infatuated with you” way
SHAUNA ❤
Are you okay?
SHAUNA ❤
You look like you’re gonna explode
jackie 🍓
SHHHHHSHHSHSHSHSH SHUT UP
jackie 🍓
I JUST
jackie 🍓
so what was that whole “i hate you so much” thing?
SHAUNA ❤
Oh God
SHAUNA ❤
Gimme a couple minutes
jackie 🍓
how many minutes
jackie 🍓
we only have seven
jackie 🍓
or like
SHAUNA ❤
Fuck that we’ve been in here for more than seven minutes
SHAUNA ❤
Plus they’re not gonna interrupt us since you know
SHAUNA ❤
Their plan worked
jackie 🍓
unfortunately
jackie 🍓
i was so ready to be pissed off at them
SHAUNA ❤
Wait so I’m gonna explain now
SHAUNA ❤
I’m not entirely sure what it was but I had this idea in my head that you would never like me back even if I DID break you two up and it was driving me crazy
SHAUNA ❤
And I knew I was being stupid and petty and irrational and I was angry at myself but it was somehow easier for me to take it out on you and Jeff
SHAUNA ❤
So when I said “I hate you so much” I really meant “I hate myself so much and I love you so much but I’m mixing those two things up as a defense mechanism”
jackie 🍓
shauna oh my god
jackie 🍓
why would you do that to yourself 😭
SHAUNA ❤
I’ve asked myself that plenty of times
jackie 🍓
but you know you couldve just told me right?
jackie 🍓
hey dont make that face
SHAUNA ❤
What face
jackie 🍓
youre frowning
SHAUNA ❤
STOP LOOKING AT ME LIKE THAT
jackie 🍓
like what
SHAUNA ❤
Like you want to kiss me or something
jackie 🍓
but i do want to kiss you
SHAUNA ❤
Shutupshutupshutupohmygod
SHAUNA ❤
Look the thing is
SHAUNA ❤
At first I didn’t want to tell you because I was afraid you wouldn’t like me back or wouldn’t understand and I’d just get tossed aside
SHAUNA ❤
And that just pissed me off and I didn’t know what exactly I was mad at and I couldn’t really accept that it was myself so I just kinda went “oh, it’s Jackie”
SHAUNA ❤
And it was like you were always so happy and caring no matter what that I felt like if you actually knew what I was thinking or if I told you any of this everything would get ruined
SHAUNA ❤
Which just felt like shit and made me feel like you wouldn’t like me back which is why I was too scared to tell you anything or even attempt to get with you
SHAUNA ❤
But I ended up doing everything the wrong way and hurting you because I let my feeling get in the way and I’m so so sorry Jackie
flowergirlakilah to “the fruit bowl ✨🍒🍎🍍🥝🫐 ✨”
Saturday, October 20, 10:54 P.M.
Akilah
can you hear anything??
Van 💗
someones crying i heard sniffles
Travis
and hshpshhsps
Van 💗
phshshhsh
Travis
theyre whispering
Natalie
can you look through the peephole
Travis
misty is trying
jackierabbit to ss.shipman
Saturday, October 20, 10:57 P.M.
jackie 💗🐇
please dont cry anymore please
shauna 🌛
How did you know I needed that hug
jackie 💗🐇
idk i just kinda did
shauna 🌛
How long was that it felt like an hour
jackie 💗🐇
three minutes
shauna 🌛
How the hell were you able to comfort me and count how long the hug was at the same time
jackie 💗🐇
im a pro at hugging
jackie 💗🐇
but because you really really opened up there i wanna tell you some things too
shauna 🌛
You know we’re being stupid as shit right now right?
shauna 🌛
Like we’re sitting across from each other in the same closet TEXTING
jackie 💗🐇
its funnier
shauna 🌛
I’m just gonna let it pass because it’s you
jackie 💗🐇
AWWWWWWWW
shauna 🌛
WHAT WERE YOU GONNA SAY
jackie 💗🐇
okay fuck i dont even know how to start
shauna 🌛
That’s why you speak
jackie 💗🐇
nuh uh
jackie 💗🐇
by the way ive been violently craving your moms latkes for like a week
shauna 🌛
i can get her to make you some
jackie 💗🐇
oh jesus please do
shauna 🌛
My mom misses you btw
jackie 💗🐇
ANYWAY um
jackie 💗🐇
in case youre having any doubts at all
jackie 💗🐇
i care about you as much as i do for a reason
jackie 💗🐇
and every time i said i loved you i meant it, just not in the way you thought i did
jackie 💗🐇
and even though i think ive said that so much its kinda lost its meaning its true
jackie 💗🐇
it was true before either of us even realized it
shauna 🌛
Because we’re both stupid as shit
jackie 💗🐇
well talk about that when we get out of here
jackie 💗🐇
but listen
jackie 💗🐇
ive never liked anyone like i like you
jackie 💗🐇
i never really cared about jeff and even though i love all of our friends like way too much and i would quite literally let them eat me if they asked
jackie 💗🐇
youve been the most important person in my life since we were five and youre always going to be
jackie 💗🐇
you know that right?
shauna 🌛
Yeah I know
jackie 💗🐇
and i know you might have trouble believing this but you can tell me anything and i will always be right here
jackie 💗🐇
and i want to help you believe that and trust me
jackie 💗🐇
and i know it might take a while but im willing to help you with it for as long as it takes
jackie 💗🐇
whether its a week or a month or a year
jackie 💗🐇
or forever
jackie 💗🐇
im never gonna see any part of you that im not in love with
shauna 🌛
Oh my god
shauna 🌛
You’re gonna kill me oh my fuck
jackie 💗🐇
EEEEEEEEEE
jackie 💗🐇
nah ill die first
jackie 💗🐇
and ill haunt you
shauna 🌛
Fucking
shauna 🌛
Fuck
shauna 🌛
I hate you
shauna 🌛
You’re so dramatic
jackie 💗🐇
you know if you hold my hand any tighter you might break it
shauna 🌛
Shut up
jackie 💗🐇
never lolz
jackie 💗🐇
by the way if you dont really want to do this
jackie 💗🐇
by “this” i mean dating me
jackie 💗🐇
then we dont have to
jackie 💗🐇
i would never make you do anything youre not comfortable with
jackie 💗🐇
but i just want you to know that no matter what you do im still gonna stick with you
jackie 💗🐇
$%@hsduyfrguyu*WYUKFUG
jesuslovesyou to “the fruit bowl ✨🍒🍎🍍🥝🫐 ✨”
Sunday, October 21, 11:13 A.M.
Laura Lee
So
Laura Lee
Uhhhhh
Laura Lee
Any updates?
Laura Lee
Literally any at all?
Misty
Nothing
Travis
Like literally nothing
Tai
They’ve been in there for an hour.
Van 💗
and its been so fucking quiet
Mari
knock???
Crystal
LMAOOO
Tai
If this didn’t work, I swear to God.
Van 💗
where are the others
Akilah
lottie and nat are on the dance floor
Akilah
or like
Akilah
dance floor the size of my living room and bedroom combined
Mari
gen and melissa are making out in the kitchen if anyones wondering
Travis
i dont know if that made my mood better or worse
Tai
I really couldn’t care less.
Van 💗
WELL OUR FUCKING PLAN FUCKING FAILED
Laura Lee
Don’t say that!!
Crystal
Please ill cry
Misty
Yeah its impossible to know until we get them out of the closet
Van 💗
youre up next
Crystal
Up next for what??
Misty
Hahahahaha nothingggggg
ss.shipman to jackierabbit
Sunday, October 21, 11:19 A.M.
SHAUNA ❤
So how do we get out of here without anyone noticing us
jackie 🍓
wait why dont we want anyone noticing us
SHAUNA ❤
One because they’re not gonna let us leave without an explanation and two
SHAUNA ❤
It is very very obvious that we just made out
jackie 🍓
wait it is
SHAUNA ❤
Jackie your hair is a total mess
SHAUNA ❤
Also my lip gloss is kinda all over your face so yeah
SHAUNA ❤
They’re probably gonna be able to put two and two together
jackie 🍓
your mouth is all swollen lol
SHAUNA ❤
Stop giggling
SHAUNA ❤
I’ve got an idea give me a second
jackie 🍓
WAIT WAIT WAIT ONE MORE THING
SHAUNA ❤
If you do this one more time I’m gonna start speaking
jackie 🍓
i love you
SHAUNA ❤
I love you too
Notes:
MARIS PLAN. I LOVE HER AND I LOVE THIS GC.
..did anyone catch onto that little genlissa sneak??? no???? okay
THEM FORCING JACKIESHAUNA INTO A CLOSET HELP THEYRE ALL SO MESSY I LOVE IT
and their confession!!! FINALLY!!! it was so awesome to write that because it was honestly so easy, i hope you guys like reading it as much as i liked writing it!!
Chapter 17: jackie and shauna, sitting in a tree (closet), KISSING
Summary:
where the hell are jackie and shauna??? no seriously, theyre gone...oh wait, no they arent, theyre chilling, but no one has any idea where they are. things are generally starting to calm down!! once theyre added to our queer gc, they get to explain themselves. all the rest of this is pretty much just gonna be filler for me to reach that 20 chapter mark.
Notes:
I PASSED MY FINALS!!! AND I GRADUATED!!! WHO CHEERED???? no one???? okay cool
so idk if summer starting means ill be updating more often or less often, but i will finish this one up before starting another fic (probably yellowjackets again, but who knows???) either way, the next chapters will probably be shorter? idk but 😭
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
vantheman to “the fruit bowl ✨🍒🍎🍍🥝🫐 ✨”
Sunday, October 21, 9:29 P.M.
Van 💗
updates
Tai
None yet.
Van 💗
no i wasnt asking
Van 💗
i was demanding.
Van 💗
GIVE ME UPDATES.
Tai
There are no updates, Van.
Natalie
i dont get how there can be NO updates
Lottie
yeah well its not really like any of us saw much
Van 💗
GIVE ME UPDATES OR I WILL SEND THE BOOGEYMAN AFTER YOU
Laura Lee
Who is the boogeyman???
Mari
ME. 😈
Melissa
JESUS THAT WAS A JUMPSCARE
Mari
oh melissa dont act slick i saw u and gen last night
Gen
we dont talk about that
Tai
What do you mean, you don’t talk about it?
Travis
youre telling me you made out and youre just not doing anything about it??
Melissa
give us a second jesus
Misty
Were getting off topic
Natalie
jackie and shauna.
Tai
Right, so what happened there???
Van 💗
theres no way NONE of you saw anything
Travis
on god we didnt
Akilah
LITERALLY WE PUT THEM IN THE CLOSET
Gen
THEY WERE IN THERE FOR AN HOUR
Lottie
THEN JEFF SADECKI AND RANDY WALSH SHOWED UP AND STARTED YELLING AT EACH OTHER IN THE MIDDLE OF THE ROOM
Mari
“yelling at each other” U MEAN FLIRTING LIKE HOMOS
Lottie
FLIRT ARGUING WHATEVER
Natalie
AND WE ALL GOT DISTRACTED AND STOPPED WATCHING THE CLOSET TO WATCH THEM BITCH AT EACH OTHER
Travis
AND THEN WHEN WE CAME BACK TO THE CLOSET JACKIE AND SHAUNA WERE GONE!!!
Tai
And that’s the synopsis.
Van 💗
…aint no way
Melissa
hand to god thats how it went down
Gen
like melissa and i stopped making out bc we heard people shouting
Melissa
gen 💀
Gen
and then like four minutes after jeff and randy finished their bitch off we just hear laura lee scream “WHERE THE FUCK ARE JACKIE AND SHAUNA???”
Natalie
the way everyones jaw dropped when she cursed was singlehandedly the funniest thing that happened at that function
Laura Lee
I WAS UPSET!!
Laura Lee
And i knew you wouldn’t judge, so I just thought yolo
Travis
…you thought what??
Laura Lee
Yolo???
Travis
okay so who taught laura lee yolo
Akilah
im more inclined to ask who taught her to curse like that????
Tai
Well, we all know the answer is Shauna.
Van 💗
yeah i might have taught laura lee yolo
Natalie
of course it was van bro 😭
Mari
Literally why would you do that
Lottie
i mean van does say yolo more than anyone here im pretty sure
Crystal
So!
Crystal
Has anyone here heard from jackie or shauna since last night???
Tai
Nope, they’ve both been completely AWOL.
Lottie
i have heard absolutely zero from jackie or shauna and ive texted them both incessantly
Natalie
my calls all went unanswered
Tai
Yeah, you told us.
Van 💗
oh now thats just fan fucking tastic
Travis
so youre telling me we ran out of ways to try and contact them without seeming desperate as fuck
Akilah
splendid
Gen
if this plan actually didnt work imma kms
Mari
no real like youre telling me i put all three of my brain cells to work for NOTHING???
Melissa
three is very generous
Mari
eat ass hat lesbian
Van 💗
SEE SHES A HAT LESBIAN WHAT DID I FUCKING TELL YOU ALL????
Tai
Sorry, but I had no idea “hat lesbian” was a genre of lesbian.
Travis
there are genres of lesbians????
Lottie
oh my sweet summer child yes there are
Travis
educate me please oh wise and all knowing lesbian
Lottie
of course
Travis
YAYYYYYYY
Melissa
im the founder of the hat lesbian genre im the original
Natalie
okay lie to urself as much as you want sweetie
Mari
im giggling and convulsing on the floor
Lottie
travis mari is what we call a loser lesbian
Travis
taking notes
Lottie
van is a clown lesbian and tai is a mean lesbian
Tai
Wait, if I’m the mean lesbian, then what’s Shauna?
Lottie
mean bisexual
Tai
Right, of course.
Natalie
but im also a mean bisexual
Travis
i think you might be a loser bisexual
Lottie
wow travis youre learning so fast
Misty
Yeah but is anyone else worried???
Crystal
Yeah like where the hell are jackie and shauna????
ss.shipman to jackierabbit
Sunday, October 21, 9:46 A.M.
jackie 🍓
shaunaaaaa
SHAUNA ❤
Why did you text me that from the bedroom??
SHAUNA ❤
You’re literally upstairs
jackie 🍓
i didnt wanna yell
SHAUNA ❤
wow thats surprisingly thoughtful
jackie 🍓
it was for your mom not you
SHAUNA ❤
Oh was it really
jackie 🍓
yeah bc i love your mom
jackie 🍓
and im still mad at you
SHAUNA ❤
No you’re not
jackie 🍓
yeah no im not
SHAUNA ❤
Anyway when you’re done in the bathroom my mom made us french toast
jackie 🍓
OH MY GOD YOUR MOM IS JESUS
SHAUNA ❤
My mom is Jewish
jackie 🍓
jewish jesus
SHAUNA ❤
You know what sure
jackie 🍓
also speaking of your mom do you think she knows
SHAUNA ❤
Knows what
jackie 🍓
that we made out for like twenty minutes last night
jackie 🍓
or that we shared a bed
jackie 🍓
or that im wearing your pajamas right now
SHAUNA ❤
I think she might???
SHAUNA ❤
She’s been smiling at me really big since I came downstairs
SHAUNA ❤
And if she sees you in my pjs she’s definitely gonna know
jackie 🍓
omg imagine if she heard us 💀
SHAUNA ❤
I will actually jump in front of traffic
jackie 🍓
i might go with you
SHAUNA ❤
But really I don’t think we need to worry
jackie 🍓
yeah no debs chill
SHAUNA ❤
I IMPLORE you to stop calling my mom DEB
jackie 🍓
but her name is deb
SHAUNA ❤
Yeah but I don’t call your mom by her first name
jackie 🍓
yeah bc my moms a bitch
jackie 🍓
shed like go on a killing spree if we told her
jackie 🍓
speaking of which do you wanna tell anyone????
SHAUNA ❤
Honestly kind of????
SHAUNA ❤
Taissa, Natalie, and Lottie have been blowing my phone up for hours
SHAUNA ❤
Plus we’ve put them through enough by now
jackie 🍓
yeah lottie and nat texted me too
jackie 🍓
nat just made fun of me and lottie went from begging for my forgiveness to asking me if i was alive and whether or not she should call 911
SHAUNA ❤
Same here but Taissa just checked in like every thirty minutes requesting my location and calling me medieval insults
SHAUNA ❤
(insert screenshot)
jackie 🍓
IM WHEEZING WHAT
SHAUNA ❤
Yeah I just heard you roll off the bed
SHAUNA ❤
My mom’s asking if you’re okay
jackie 🍓
IM FINE ITS JUST TAI 😭😭😭😭😭
jackie 🍓
“LETHARGIC CRETIN”???????
jackie 🍓
WHAT DOES THAT EVEN MEAN GHOISYHFUFGUS
SHAUNA ❤
You don’t know what that means??
jackie 🍓
no bc im not a nerd
jackie 🍓
but btw
SHAUNA ❤
Mhm?
jackie 🍓
are we dating now???
SHAUNA ❤
Jackie
SHAUNA ❤
We literally made out several times
SHAUNA ❤
You slept in my bed with me
SHAUNA ❤
You are in my room in my clothes
SHAUNA ❤
My mom is making you french toast
jackie 🍓
well yeah but minus the making out part thats how we normally acted together
jackie 🍓
and i didnt want to assume i mean
jackie 🍓
i wasnt entirely sure you wanted to be my girlfriend
SHAUNA ❤
Jackie I confessed my love to you over text and kissed you in a closet
SHAUNA ❤
What made you think I DIDN’T want to be your girlfriend??
jackie 🍓
YEAH WELL IVE NEVER HAD A GIRLFRIEND BEFORE
SHAUNA ❤
I’VE NEVER DATED ANYONE BEFORE
jackie 🍓
yeah well
jackie 🍓
i kinda spent a whole month thinking you said yes to melissa so 💀
SHAUNA ❤
STILL confused on that
SHAUNA ❤
I NEVER told you I said yes
jackie 🍓
YEAH BUT MISTY TOLD ME SHE ASKED YOU
jackie 🍓
AND CONVENIENTLY LEFT OUT THE PART WHERE YOU SAID NO
SHAUNA ❤
Misty fucking Quigley I swear
jackie 🍓
heyyyy no shes sweet!!
SHAUNA ❤
That freaky little four eyed mushroom has something much more sinister than “sweet” going on
jackie 🍓
STOP I JUST GIGGLED
SHAUNA ❤
I CAN HEAR IT
SHAUNA ❤
Now come downstairs the french toast is getting cold
SHAUNA ❤
And I’m gonna come out to my mom
jackie 🍓
OH MY GOD IM RUNNING
ss.shipman to taiturner
Sunday, October 21, 10:07 A.M.
shauna 🌛
Relax I’m alive
taissa ♔
Well, it’s about fucking time.
taissa ♔
Where are you?
shauna 🌛
At my house
shauna 🌛
In my bed
taissa ♔
Where’s Jackie?
shauna 🌛
Also at my house
shauna 🌛
In my bed
taissa ♔
WHAT?
shauna 🌛
Yep you heard it
taissa ♔
There’s no way.
taissa ♔
What did you DO?
shauna 🌛
Why don’t you add us to the group chat you obviously made and we can tell you there?
taissa ♔
What
taissa ♔
Group chat
taissa ♔
What group chat
taissa ♔
What a weird idea, Shauna, where did you get that from
shauna 🌛
You're not slick
shauna 🌛
Also I saw you texting “the fruit bowl” at the party last night
taissa ♔
Shit.
shauna 🌛
Yeah
taiturner to “the fruit bowl ✨🍒🍎🍍🥝🫐 ✨”
Sunday, October 21, 10:10 A.M.
Tai
(insert screenshot)
Tai
We're fucked, Shauna found out.
Van 💗
WAIT SHE RESPONDED???
Lottie
SHES ALIVE OH THANK HOLY FUCK
Natalie
TELL HER TO CALL ME BACK MY CALL WENT UNANSWERED
Travis
STFU ABOUT YOUR UNANSWERED CALL NAT
Misty
We should add her!!
Akilah
shouldnt we delete some of our other messages though
Mari
were too lazy
Gen
word
Laura Lee
What about Jackie??
Lottie
oop
Tai
She just texted us.
jackierabbit to “girlkissers official gc”
Sunday, October 21, 10:12 A.M.
jackie 🍓
guess what bitches
van 🔥
JACKIE HOLY BALLS
taissa ⚽️
Was the balls part really necessary?
van 🔥
i meant soccer balls get ur mind out of the gutter
lottie 🦌
OH MY SHIT WHERE DID YOU GO???
jackie 🍓
shaunas bed 😜
van 🔥
FUCKING WHERE????
lottie 🦌
SAY SIKE RN
lottie 🦌
this is nat btw
taissa ⚽️
That’s basically exactly what I said when Shauna told me.
jackie 🍓
shauna told you??
lottie 🦌
how did you even get out without getting caught (this is lottie again)
van 🔥
and you just went to shaunas and????
taissa ⚽️
And what?
van 🔥
EXACTLY?? what happened??
jackie 🍓
it’s a long story
van 🔥
its sunday
jackie 🍓
and im assuming you want the whole explanation
taissa ⚽️
Yes, please.
lottie 🦌
FUCK YEAH
lottie 🦌
that was nat but lottie agrees with me
jackie 🍓
so gimme a minute to unblock the gc so u all can know
van 🔥
u can just join our new one
jackie 🍓
your what
lottie 🦌
whoopsie
taissa ⚽️
I already told Shauna I would add you two.
jackie 🍓
you MADE A NEW GC to plot on us??
van 🔥
travis crystal and the jv girls are in there too
lottie 🦌
the closet thing was maris plan
taissa ⚽️
So, give me a second and I will add you and Shauna.
taiturner has added ss.shipman and jackierabbit to “the fruit bowl ✨🍒🍎🍍🥝🫐 ✨”
Sunday, October 21, 10:18 A.M.
Tai
Okay, I added you both.
Mari
JACKIE SHAUNA HIIIIIIII
Melissa
hi shauna
Gen
tired. sigh.
Melissa
gen we made out ONCE why are you acting so bitchy
Jackie
sorry you WHAT???
Shauna
What did we miss
Gen
WHY WOULD YOU SAY THAT
Melissa
IT SLIPPED
Akilah
JUST LIKE MY FOOT WILL SLIP UP UR ASS
Melissa
WHAT???
Mari
THE. FOOT. WILL. SLIP. UP. YOUR. ASS.
Gen
WHY??????
Tai
STOP BEING ANNOYING.
Travis
THATS not the important part
Crystal
Yeah its what WE missed
Jackie
you didnt miss a lot!!
Van 💗
bffr
Shauna
It was kind of a lot
Jackie
yeah but not a LOT a lot
Shauna
But it was
Jackie
not lottie and nat trying to kill each other level though
Tai
I mean, true, but.
Tai
The Lottie and Nat level of drama is already hard enough to beat.
Lottie
did NOT need to get read today but okay
Natalie
yeah youre here to fill us in on the tea not remind me of my dark days
Mari
those dark days were my only sense of entertainment for years 😩
Akilah
shes a drama whore in case you couldnt tell
Van 💗
real asf
Tai
Jackie and Shauna, would you mind explaining what happened?
Tai
Like, during that whole HOUR you were in the closet and how you snuck out and everything.
Travis
now
Travis
like
Misty
Now.
Travis
exactly
Laura Lee
Right none of us even saw you leave the closet!
Akilah
sorry but the wording of that made me giggle 😭
Van 💗
feel like the closet is a familiar concept to all of us atp
Tai
Quiet.
Tai
Jackie and Shauna??
Jackie
uhhhhh well
Shauna
Where exactly do you want us to start??
Tai
When we put you in the closet, obviously.
Crystal
WAITWAITWAIT
Crystal
Can you actually explain what happened at the party first???
Crystal
I feel like everyone knows except me
Laura Lee
It’s very complicated
Jackie
okay well um misty texted me once saying that melissa had asked shauna to my party
Melissa
which is true
Melissa
but shauna said no
Jackie
right but misty didnt tell me that part so i just assumed that shauna and melissa were going together
Crystal
SERIOUSLY MISTY????
Misty
I HAD NO IDEA SHE WOULD JUMP TO THAT CONCLUSION!!!
Gen
MELISSA SAID SHAUNA SAID NO LITERALLY TWO TEXTS LATER 😭
Shauna
And I had resolved to not let Jackie find out about Melissa asking me because I didn’t want her to get the wrong idea
Shauna
But she got it anyway even when I didn’t tell her
Natalie
right and she told me and made me swear on my fathers grave that i wouldnt tell anyone
Tai
And then the plan, right?
Tai
Laura Lee told us about that part.
Shauna
Right so I was going kinda insane and I started plotting to break up Jackie and Jeff at the party and I asked for Laura Lee’s help with my plan
Travis
why LAURA LEE of all people 💀
Lottie
THATS WHAT I SAID!!!!
Shauna
But then at the party it all went sideways
Jackie
i was pissed bc i thought shauna and melissa were a thing
Shauna
And my original plan backfired
Laura Lee
So I tweaked it a little and dared Randy Walsh to kiss Jeff
Gen
ll you were actually so funny for that ngl
Van 💗
NO REAL I WAS DYING LAUGHINGHDH
Tai
Yeah, I had to hold you upright.
Shauna
And since we were both wasted and upset we started fighting
Jackie
im sure you all remember it
Misty
It was traumatizing
Laura Lee
I almost sobbed
Akilah
me too twin
Natalie
meanwhile i made out with lottie and then ran away
Lottie
so we werent there for a while
Tai
Meaning we all had to deal with double the sapphic heartbreak.
Travis
i just had to deal with nat and that was hard enough istg 💀
Jackie
so we spent a week pretending to hate each other but not really
Shauna
and basically making ourselves miserable for it
Van 💗
as one does when theyre sad and gay
Shauna
And then your “plan” came in
Mari
HHEHSHHAUHFUHGKJDIHG 😈
Jackie
so we were stuck in a closet
Van 💗
what were you even doing in there
Tai
Yeah, you were there for an hour and we didn’t hear a thing.
Jackie
oh i texted her
Shauna
Yeah
Natalie
aint no way 💀
Lottie
you did what now
Tai
You texted?
Tai
You were right next to each other in the same fucking closet and you TEXTED??
Jackie
yeah bc we knew you would be eavesdropping and we didnt want you to hear
Shauna
It was a very private conversation
Mari
yeah makes sense
Gen
NO IT FUCKING DONT????
Tai
Okay, but what did you tell each other??
Jackie
nothing
Travis
cap
Lottie
SHOW US
Natalie
SHOW US
Travis
SHOW US
Mari
SHOW US
Van 💗
SHOW US
Van 💗
btw lotties a cult leader now
Lottie
hehe
Shauna
Why am I not surprised
Tai
I have no idea, actually.
Tai
Because I was very fucking surprised.
Jackie
(insert screenshot)
Jackie
(insert screenshot)
Jackie
(insert screenshot)
Jackie
(insert screenshot)
Jackie
(insert screenshot)
Jackie
thats most of the texts
Van 💗
AWWWWWWW
Tai
That’s really adorable, actually.
Travis
DAMNNNNNNNNNNNNNN
Lottie
JACKIE YOU ATE THAT UP
Natalie
shauna opening up???
Natalie
this is a miracle
Shauna
Eat shit
Mari
melissa hyd right now
Melissa
im surprisingly fine actually
Gen
oh
Jackie
and then she kissed me
Tai
Okay, but how?
Shauna
The fuck you mean how
Natalie
DETAILS
Lottie
DETAILS I SAY!!!
Van 💗
why are the two of you a hive mind atp
Akilah
“how” as in like was it like quick or aggressive or a makeout or wtv
Mari
yeah we wanna know
Gen
i dont actually
Melissa
shhhhhh
Misty
YOU want to know???
Tai
Jackie, Shauna, stop being difficult.
Tai
We’re losing our shit, just tell us.
Shauna
I pushed her phone out of her hand, grabbed her by the skirt, made eye contact for like a millisecond and then kissed her
Jackie
as in she fucking kiss-tackled me to the floor of the closet like a flying squirrel???
Shauna
Is that enough to satisfy your fanfictions?
Laura Lee
What is a fanfiction??
Misty
GASP
Crystal
YOU DONT KNOW WHAT A FANFICTION IS???
Laura Lee
No???
Misty
WE NEED TO CATCH YOU UP
Laura Lee
Does it have anything to do with Ethel Cain??
Tai
Focus.
Tai
How did you get out of the party?
Shauna
I texted Jeff and Randy and told them to cause a distraction
Mari
OH MY FUCKING GOD
Van 💗
THATS WHAT THAT WAS???
Tai
So you’re telling me their party-crashing was YOU??
Jackie
PARTY CRASHING???
Jackie
SHAUNA YOU NEVER TOLD ME THAT WAS THE PLAN!!!
Lottie
shauna and her plans ffs
Natalie
theyre always fucking insane
Travis
theyre always funny as shit tho
Laura Lee
And they always include Jeff and Randy for some reason???
Tai
Yeah, why do they always include Jeff and Randy?
Shauna
Because I fucking hate them
Jackie
okay relax babe
Van 💗
WAIT SO YOURE A THING NOW????
Crystal
TELL US THE REST PLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASE
Misty
:)
Shauna
Right so when you were all distracted Jackie texted Robin and asked her to unlock the door and gave her fifteen bucks to not say anything
Melissa
fucking robin 💀
Tai
Which one is Robin, again?
Van 💗
the little twinky girl whos always crying
Travis
oh my god my dad fucking hates her
Travis
dont tell her i said that
Tai
So you got Robin to let you out and then you went to Shauna’s house?
Jackie
yeah we walked
Natalie
you WALKED???
Shauna
Yeah because we both got people to drive us there and we didn’t want to like ask for a ride because that would make it obvious
Akilah
didnt that take forever tho
Jackie
yeah well we stopped a couple times on the way to make out more lololol
Shauna
Then we got back to my house and Jackie got into my pajamas and slept in my bed with me
Jackie
basically a sleepover
Van 💗
but gay??
Tai
They were already gay.
Shauna
Right so then we woke up and my mom made us french toast and I came out to her
Laura Lee
Awwww how’d that go!!
Shauna
She held my hand and said “aw sweetie, I knew you two would end up dating someday”
Natalie
LMAO UR MOM CLOCKED IT???
Lottie
ATP EVERYONE CLOCKED IT
Jackie
and then she gave both of us a big hug and told me to call her mom now
Shauna
Jackie almost cried
Jackie
I LOVE YOUR MOM
Van 💗
AWWW DEB
Natalie
I LOVE DEB
Tai
We all love Deb.
Lottie
yeah debs the best
Shauna
STOP CALLING HER DEB
Travis
i feel u shauna these hos call my dad coach
Tai
What would you have us call him?
Travis
fucking ugly ass bitch dickwad
Tai
…Oh.
Notes:
JACKIESHAUNA SNEAKING AWAY AND NO ONE KNOWING WHERE THEY ARE SO FUNNY HELP MEEEE
sleeping in the same bed and wearing pjs and and AND OH MY GOD I LOVE JACKIESHAUNA
yes shaunas moms name is deb fight me on this (actually this is an extremely popular headcanon so)
THE EXPLANATION OF WHAT HAPPENED HELP theyre all so insane
(also genlissa getting their shit together...they possessed me okay)
Chapter 18: travis’ dad is a certified menace to society
Summary:
volleyball girls start circulating dating rumors and jackie and shauna have NO CLUE what to do about it. meanwhile travis goes on a side quest—or his dad does. into handcuffs.
Notes:
this is filler. this is optional. this is just fluff and nonsense and goofiness that you dont need to read if you dont want to. however you SHOULD read the last chapter, because. just because
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
that_h0t_sh1t to “the fruit bowl ✨🍒🍎🍍🥝🫐 ✨”
Monday, October 22, 3:48 P.M.
Mari
yo asswipes
Mari
and by asswipes i specifically mean jackie and shauna
Tai
Is this about the volleyball girls?
Travis
oh fml more drama
Gen
theres always more drama 😈
Van 💗
and thank the lord for it
Laura Lee
Don’t bring the Lord into this
Van 💗
my bad g
Shauna
What do you mean the volleyball girls
Jackie
what did those heteros say now
Natalie
HETEROS HELP 💀💀💀💀💀
Lottie
NOT JACKIE FULLY ADJUSTING
Tai
Wait, you mean you didn’t hear them today?
Jackie
no not really
Shauna
We were preoccupied
Akilah
wtf were you so preoccupied with
Crystal
Making out in a stairwell question mark??
Melissa
imagine if that was actually it
Misty
Methinks it is
Travis
what is it with you gays and always saying methinks
Laura Lee
I don’t say methinks
Travis
yeah youre one of the good ones
Tai
Preoccupied or not, what happened today definitely concerns you two.
Mari
the volleyball girls found out that youre dating
Shauna
What the fuck how?
Jackie
DID YOU GUYS TELL ANYONE??
Travis
nope
Melissa
fuck no im not a snitch
Misty
Crystal and me didnt tell anyone
Van 💗
no what
Lottie
i swear i havent told anyone not even the spiders on my ceiling
Natalie
what about the voices
Lottie
:)
Tai
Of course not!
Tai
But what Mari means is that they didn’t FIND OUT, they’re just suspecting.
Mari
yeah yeah worded that wrong
Mari
they dont know FS but theyre starting dating rumors
Natalie
lucky BITCHES i always wanted to have dating rumors
Travis
nat tf u mean weve had dating rumors for like months
Lottie
WEVE had dating rumors
Travis
the way both of them came true 💀💀💀💀💀
Lottie
the manifestations 💀💀💀💀💀
Van 💗
why are yall twins lowkey 😭
Akilah
nat has a type
Nat
fuck OFFFFFFFFF
Jackie
wait so what are the volleyball girls saying about us
Van 💗
that youre a couple of big fat lesbians
Lottie
instead of a big fat lesbian and a big fat bisexual
Tai
But, again, we don’t know how much these rumors have spread.
Tai
So it might not really be a big deal.
mrjeffsadecki to jackierabbit
Monday, October 22, 4:03 P.M.
jeff 💩
hey jax??
jeff 💩
idk if youve heard but people at school have been talking about us breaking up and stuff
jeff 💩
i mean i obviously dont want to assume anything but you know
jeff 💩
are you dating shauna??
jackierabbit to “the fruit bowl ✨🍒🍎🍍🥝🫐 ✨”
Monday, October 22, 4:04 P.M.
Jackie
oh its fucking spread alright
Jackie
jeff knows
Shauna
Sorry WHAT???
Van 💗
HOLY FUCK NO
Mari
ABORT MISSION ABORT MISSION
Tai
Wait, what do you mean he knows?
Lottie
yeah like what did he say
Natalie
can you send a ss
Jackie
uhhhhhhhh maybe
Jackie
can he see if i screenshot the messages
Travis
no
Akilah
no
Gen
you dumb fucking cunts this isnt snapchat
Jackie
(insert screenshot)
Melissa
jackie why is his user a shit emoji 😭
Tai
Are you going to reply??
Van 💗
wouldnt be the first time she left him on read
Akilah
shh
Misty
VAN 😂
Jackie
i guess i just say no???
Shauna
WHY WOULD YOU SAY NO???
Jackie
I WAS ASKING ITS NOT LIKE I WANNA
Shauna
BUT WHY IS THAT EVEN AN OPTION
Jackie
IDK DO WE WANT PEOPLE TO THINK WERE DATING????
Shauna
WE ARE DATING JACKIE WHAT
Van 💗
mommy and daddy are fighting guys
Natalie
oh no im hiding in the corner
Lottie
fuck that not again
Tai
Can you guys be serious for one fucking minute?
Akilah
wait where did travis go
Crystal
What
Laura Lee
He just went offline
Natalie
its no big deal hes just being a drama queen
Tai
JACKIE AND SHAUNA, BACK ON TOPIC.
Jackie
im gonna tell jeff that its a long story and he doesnt need to worry about it
Shauna
What if he pushes it
Jackie
hes a dumb fuck hes not gonna push it
Misty
WHAT IS THIS JEFF SLANDER??
Van 💗
lesbianism
Tai
A very common concept to all of us, of course.
jackierabbit to mrjeffsadecki
Monday, October 22, 4:21 P.M.
jackie 🍓
ohhhhhhh god yeah all those rumors
jeff 💩
rumors
jackie 🍓
its a really really long story jeff 😭
jackie 🍓
but you really don’t need to worry abt that right now!
jeff 💩
i mean okay i guess
jeff 💩
thanks??
jackie 🍓
oh no problem!
nat_the_scat to “the fruit bowl ✨🍒🍎🍍🥝🫐 ✨”
Monday, October 22, 4:29 P.M.
Natalie
what did he say
Jackie
this
Jackie
(insert screenshot)
Tai
That’s a relief.
Tai
I think?
Lottie
PLZ HE FELL FOR IT SO FAST 💀
Shauna
Every day that white boy’s stupidity amazes me even more
Laura Lee
Hey, that’s rude!!
Van 💗
SHAUNA STOP BEING MEAN TO JEFF SADECKI CHALLENGE
Shauna
No thanks
Gen
to be fair i wouldnt do that shit either
Melissa
yeah that’s cuz ur both bitches
Akilah
yeah you ALSO have a type
Natalie
OH MY GODDDDD
Tai
Jackie and Shauna, you need to find a way to end the dating speculation.
Tai
Again, you should only tell people you’re together if you’re comfortable with it.
Van 💗
and if yall are gonna do a whole coming out you have to make it dramatic
Natalie
that’s the best way to do it
Lottie
me and nat did it by just loudly announcing we were girlfriends
Crystal
Didnt natalie slap kevyn tan in the face and say “STAY AWAY FROM MY GIRLFRIEND” very loudly in the cafeteria???
Mari
oh yeah that was hilarious
Natalie
yeah and peoples jaws dropped
Jackie
so that’s the goal i guess
Shauna
On it
Mari
akilah and i just made out in the library once and everyone was like 😨😨😨
Akilah
“made out” as in i was trying to study and she was bitching that i was ignoring her so we kissed so she would shut up
Mari
and people saw and were like “MORE jv lesbians???”
Gen
and then theres just me and mel making out in the kitchen once
Melissa
you need to be silenced
Gen
okay silence me then
Van 💗
AYOOOOOOOOO
Tai
Van, shut up.
Van 💗
im sat 🛐
Travis
FUCKING
Travis
SHIT
Travis
AHDHSIDGEHSISHDH
Tai
Travis, what’s wrong??
Laura Lee
You’re back!!
Natalie
WHAT HAPPENED
Misty
THANK GOD
Crystal
WE THOUGHT YOU DIED
Travis
(voice note 0:38)
Shauna
Yeah I’m not playing that
Tai
I’ll try.
Tai
Yeah, no, that’s gonna make me go deaf.
Jackie
why are you screaming 😭
Van 💗
why is EVERYONE screaming
Gen
yall im too lazy to play it what does it say
Melissa
uhhhhhh screaming screaming screaming
Akilah
like “FUCK FUCK FUCK AAA” and someone’s sobbing in the back??
Lottie
cursing and then a whole lot of angry spanish
Natalie
yeah he breaks into spanish when he’s really angry
Mari
AYYYY I UNDERSTOOD ALLAT
Travis
OH SHIT HABLAS ESPANOL??
Mari
SI ✊✊✊✊
Travis
LETSGOOOOO
Mari
LATINOS UNITE
Mari
so sick of you white people
Tai
Excuse me?
Mari
NONONO NOT YOU
Lottie
i speak mandarin
Lottie
i suck at french im so sorry
Travis
yk what you get a pass
Jackie
lmao lottie i suck at french too 😭
Travis
no pass for you.
Jackie
WHAT.
Shauna
I’m running this voice memo through Google translate one second
Van 💗
fuck how come no one else thought of that
Tai
I don’t know?
Tai
Because it’s Shauna?
Mari
do we tell them or do we let them work it out
Travis
nah don’t tell them
Travis
this should be fun
Melissa
he said padre like seven times
Melissa
that means dad right??
Akilah
yeah i think so
Laura Lee
Wait, what happened to Coach Martinez?
Van 💗
i think its more like what did coach martinez DO
Shauna
Wait okay this is going to take a second to translate
Shauna
Something about an ass?
Lottie
travis why are you angrily shouting about ass 💀
Natalie
its chill this is just him on the regular
Tai
That concerns me on so many levels.
Mari
why is that concerning i angrily shout abt ass
Akilah
yeah so its concerning now that you do it
Gen
everything gets concerning when she does it
Melissa
giggling
Tai
Travis, can you tell us what’s wrong?
Tai
I’m all right at Spanish, but you’re too loud for me to understand.
Jackie
its too loud for any mf to understand
Van 💗
i mean i do blast music at the highest possible volume so the loud isn’t the problem 😭😭
Lottie
you need help
Van 💗
YOU need help boi
Misty
Why did you just call her boi
Crystal
Theres only one boy in this gc and hes cursing in spanish
Tai
Did ANYONE hear me?
Jackie
what did coach martinez do
Shauna
HOLY SHIT
Mari
did she crack it??
Travis
she cracked it
Natalie
of COURSE shaunas the first one to figure it out
Tai
Do we hate our coach now?
Travis
you didnt hate him ALREADY??
Van 💗
nah dw i hated that bitch since freshman year
Gen
never really liked him tbh
Melissa
yeah he just yells all the time
Melissa
he makes robin cry
Lottie
everything makes robin cry 💀
Jackie
okay so he did something horrendous
Crystal
More horrendous than fat shaming me off the team??
Travis
he DID THAT
Crystal
Yeah if i had to hear “maybe you should lose some more weight to make it to varsity” one more time i would have shot him
Travis
you should have shot him
Van 💗
yeah i would have applauded
Tai
Oh God, Crystal, I’m so so sorry!
Crystal
NAHHH it’s fine!
Crystal
Now im the most talented person in musical theater AND i have an awesome girlfriend
Misty
And you deserve it babe!!
Crystal
😘😘
Gen
and THATS called WINNING GOOD people
Travis
oh yk what that just makes me happier that hes gone
Tai
Wait, GONE?
Crystal
Yay!!
Melissa
LMAO???
Mari
do we say it
Shauna
I mean I’ve already figured it out
Travis
yk what sure
Travis
dad got minorly arrested
Tai
He did WHAT?
Natalie
THERES NO WAY THERES NO WAY
Natalie
THERES ACTUALLY NO WAY
Lottie
WHAT DID HE DO???
Van 💗
DID HE KILL SOMEONE TELL ME HE KILLED SOMEONE
Jackie
OH MY GOD TRAVIS ARE YOU OKAY?!?!?!
Laura Lee
Oh no that’s awful!!!
Laura Lee
Are you all right??
Travis
LMAO I COULDNT BE BETTER
Travis
and its not like anything major he just got in this huge ass fight
Akilah
huge enough to get arrested?
Travis
i guess so??
Travis
he should be there for like two or three days unless we bail him out
Tai
Are you going to bail him out?
Travis
my moms kinda pissed with him so shes just gonna leave him there to be petty
Van 💗
LMAO WHY IS UR MOM AN ICON?
Natalie
I LOVE YOUR MOM FOR THAT HELLO 💀💀💀💀
Lottie
WHEEZING HELP MEEEE
Shauna
I would’ve done the same thing
Gen
no real i would want a couple days without that mf
Laura Lee
Wow, you guys are heinous
Melissa
wait maybe i DO have a type
Monday, October 22, 9:46 P.M.
Travis
okay so dads home again
Travis
unfortunately
Natalie
goddamnit
Lottie
send him back to jail tf
Melissa
so do we just pretend we DONT know he got arrested
Jackie
yeah like what do we do at soccer practice tomorrow
Akilah
i mean the kind and respectful thing would be to keep it a secret
Tai
That is true.
Tai
However—
Van 💗
HOWEVERRR 😈😈😈😈
Shauna
We’re not kind and respectful people
Travis
so can any of you start telling people
Mari
oh fuck yeah i love telling people tea
Mari
me and gen are on it
Gen
HELL YEAH WE ARE
Mari
give us like a day and everyone will know
Travis
i am forever in your debt 🙏
Jackie
traumatize that motherfucker
Mari
well do our best
Gen
you bet
Tai
What if he knows it was us?
Travis
even better
Jackie
yknow what we should do
Jackie
to REALLY fuck everything up
Melissa
what
Jackie
shauna and i should tell people were dating on the SAME DAY you tell people ur dad went to jail
Gen
OH MY GOD.
Lottie
NO YOU SHOULD
Tai
Something tells me this is going to be…
Tai
So unbelievably chaotic.
Van 💗
JUSTTTT how we like it
africangrey to “the fruit bowl ✨🍒🍎🍍🥝🫐 ✨”
Tuesday, October 23, 2:55 P.M.
misty 🍄
Sooooo howd it go???
mari 💅
the travis dad tea??
SHAUNA ❤️
Or the me and Jackie tea?
crystal 🎶
Start with travis dad first
gen 💫
yeah well to put it simply
melissa 🧢
the whole school knows
travis 👾
my dad has been avoiding eye contact with everyone for 24 hours
travis 👾
his pathetic meter is off the CHARTS and i am loving it
jackie 🍓
he like barely showed up for practice 💀
jackie 🍓
and he was like locked up in his office all day
van 🔥
mf deserves it
taissa ⚽️
Van, don’t be rude.
nat 🚬
but shes right
taissa ⚽️
But she’s right.
lottie 🦌
fuck yeah
akilah 🪷
i had to hold mari back from trying to photoshop his mugshot
travis 👾
lmao my mom put his mugshot on the fridge
jackie 🍓
I LOVE YOUR MOM X2
jackie 🍓
also isn’t that from fucking gilmore girls
travis 👾
my moms obsessed w that show so probably
jackie 🍓
i love your mom x3
misty 🍄
So thats one half
misty 🍄
What about the second thing??
crystal 🎶
yeah how did it go jackie and shauna??
jackie 🍓
spectacular
nat 🚬
wild???
van 🔥
hilarious
lottie 🦌
chaotic
taissa ⚽️
Embarrassing.
SHAUNA ❤️
Pretty good actually
melissa 🧢
details please
mari 💅
yes details
gen 💫
not a request btw 🔪🔪🔪
travis 👾
gays these days
laura lee 😇
I know right
travis 👾
didnt u and lottie used to date
laura lee 😇
We don’t talk about that
lottie 🦌
yeah we dont want nat to erupt into murder
nat 🚬
HEY
akilah 🪷
also why does MELISSA wanna know the details now
misty 🍄
Yeah i thought youd be really against it
jackie 🍓
ok time for me to dip
SHAUNA ❤️
NO GET BACK HERE
melissa 🧢
i mean shauna has a gf now so still trying to date her would be stupid
melissa 🧢
im kinda over it now anyway
melissa 🧢
like now im starting to realize that shes not actually all that
melissa 🧢
no offense shauna
jackie 🍓
EXCUSE me
jackie 🍓
shauna is TOTALLY all that wdym
SHAUNA ❤️
Lol it’s fine Melissa
akilah 🪷
and thats called character development kids
travis 👾
never thought id see the day
misty 🍄
Gen is punching the air rn
mari 💅
TELL ME HOW IT WENT PLEASEHWHDHEH
jackie 🍓
OKAY OKAY OKAY SO
jackie 🍓
it was in homeroom
van 🔥
and like 75% of the grade was there as always
taissa ⚽️
Which is probably why they did that then, but oh well.
SHAUNA ❤️
So Jackie and I walked in and then we were going to go to our seats
jackie 🍓
and our seats are on opposite sides of the room
travis 👾
oh yeah you cried over that on the first day of freshman year
nat 🚬
so dramatic for what smh
lottie 🦌
says the girl who puked sobbed and then said AND I QUOTE
lottie 🦌
“im so sorry lottie i love you sosososo much and the worst part is that you dont love me back and the worst WORST part is that im a fucking idiot” 💀💀
van 🔥
at least the last part was true
misty 🍄
She SAID that?
mari 💅
oh fuck my life thats hilarious
jackie 🍓
UM BUT
jackie 🍓
anyway 😭
lottie 🦌
AND WHEN SHAUNAS WALKING TO HER SEAT JACKIE GOES
lottie 🦌
“hey shauna you look cute as fuck today, no homo though!!!”
nat 🚬
and shauna goes “yes homo”
jackie 🍓
and i go “what?”
SHAUNA ❤️
So I say “Jax, we’re literally dating, yes homo”
van 🔥
and then shauna GRABS HER BY THE BELT LOOPS and KISSES HER
taissa ⚽️
People’s jaws actually dropped.
misty 🍄
I heard someone literally GASP
laura lee 😇
That was me
jackie 🍓
it was actually kinda wonderful
SHAUNA ❤️
Never thought I’d end up making out with Jackie in the middle of homeroom but
SHAUNA ❤️
It happened
travis 👾
i literally started to clap
nat 🚬
lottie and i usually use homeroom time to make out but even we were LOCKED tf in
gen 💫
didnt need to know that first bit but good for you
lottie 🦌
i giggled so hard im not even joking
laura lee 😇
Lottie sweetheart that was not a giggle
jackie 🍓
yeah it was like you were possessed
van 🔥
it was like AHAHAGAGSHEJEJ 👺
nat 🚬
it unnerved me so bad i actually fell off her lap and hit the floor
SHAUNA ❤️
Isn’t that just normal Lottie laughing though
taissa ⚽️
Yeah, that’s what she sounds like every time
lottie 🦌
OKAY WOW
jackie 🍓
NONONO IM SORRY
jackie 🍓
I TAKE IT BACK LOGTIE I LOVE YOUR LAUGH
nat 🚬
tf is a logtie
van 🔥
LOGTIE 💀
akilah 🪷
am i missing something
mari 💅
nah baby im missing smth too
melissa 🧢
yeah no shit were all missing smth
gen 💫
jv erasure smh
crystal 🎶
So now what?
jackie 🍓
what do you mean
travis 👾
like now that weve ended my dads evil reign
gen 💫
and jackie and shauna are done with their side quest
laura lee 😇
Yeah what happens now
taissa ⚽️
Honestly, maybe nothing?
van 🔥
yeah whats left to do at this point
jackie 🍓
nationals
lottie 🦌
oh my GOD
SHAUNA ❤️
Jackie no
nat 🚬
NO I HAD PEACE OF MIND
van 🔥
now did you just HAVE to do that
taissa ⚽️
Fuck’s sake, WHY???
jackie 🍓
WHAT???
jackie 🍓
YOU WERE ASKING NOW WHAT
mari 💅
I DIDNT MEAN MAKE US SUFFER
akilah 🪷
I WAS HAPPY I WAS PEACEFUL
gen 💫
I WAS NEITHER BUT NOW IM GONNA PUKE
melissa 🧢
i forgot about nationals tbh
jackie 🍓
yeah i kinda did too
SHAUNA ❤️
Even JACKIE forgot oh my god 😭
van 🔥
that’s how you know the drama is insane
taissa ⚽️
Actually, insane is the PERFECT word for everything that’s happened.
travis 👾
honestly the only thing that would make this better is if my dad was still in jail
nat 🚬
#puthimbackinjail
lottie 🦌
starting a petition
travis 👾
im signing that shit
jackie 🍓
honestly i feel like nationals won’t even be too bad now
jackie 🍓
like weve already gone through all this bullshit
SHAUNA ❤️
I mean when you put it like that
SHAUNA ❤️
Then yeah actually
lottie 🦌
yeah we won you guys
nat 🚬
we pushed through all the drama
van 🔥
we went through hell and came out the other side
mari 💅
no YALL were in hell
gen 💫
yeah we were just kinda chilling
akilah 🪷
watching is a more accurate word for it
jackie 🍓
you guys are so lucky for that
taissa ⚽️
But it’s all over now.
misty 🍄
Were done!!
nat 🚬
so our lives are just about to get really boring huh
lottie 🦌
not if we keep it interesting
SHAUNA ❤️
I’m kinda okay with my life being boring honestly
travis 👾
i dont think my life is normal if my dads MUGSHOT is on the fridge
jackie 🍓
send that picture to me please
travis 👾
you got it
taissa ⚽️
Okay, nationals is going to be such a mess.
Notes:
yeah so travis’s dad getting arrested came out of nowhere but i thought it would be pretty funny and hopefully it was??
misty “i heard someone gasp” and laura lee “that was me” STOPPP
the next chapter is kinda useless like this (or more like a recap) so im sorry for the bullshit but i MUST make this 20 chapters. it’ll be a new record
Chapter 19: guards. put the white boy into a gay crisis.
Summary:
jeff decides he wants to know all the tea, and jackie adds him to their group chat for a good old fashioned drama explanation, which is about as chaotic as you’d expect.
Notes:
THE PENULTIMATE CHAPTER!!! WE DID IT!! my next yj fic is in the works, and chapter one is about halfway done, so it’s posting should coincide with the ending of this fic. wait i cant believe ts is ending
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
mrjeffsadecki to jackierabbit
Wednesday, October 24, 2:57 P.M.
jeff 💩
so
jackie 🍓
hiiiii
jeff 💩
you and shauna are dating
jackie 🍓
wellllll
jackie 🍓
yes
jeff 💩
you could’ve just told me that when i asked
jeff 💩
whyd you tell me not to worry about it
jackie 🍓
because i dont wanna bother you anymore
jackie 🍓
atp ive put you through more than enough so
jackie 🍓
idk i just didnt wanna fuck anything up more
jeff 💩
well jesus
jeff 💩
i mean im not mad
jackie 🍓
youre not
jeff 💩
no i mean it’s not like you cheated or anything
jeff 💩
im kinda just confused
jackie 🍓
wait confused
jeff 💩
i mean im happy for you guys or whatever
jeff 💩
kinda
jeff 💩
but also what the fuck how why when and where???
jackie 🍓
i mean yeah
jackie 🍓
thats definitely fair
jeff 💩
even if its not youre in no place to talk
jackie 🍓
yeah 😭
jeff 💩
yeah so im still pissed at you
jeff 💩
but ill let you off the hook on one condition
jackie 🍓
yeah of course!!
jackie 🍓
what is it?
jeff 💩
add me to your gc with all your little gay friends
jeff 💩
so you can tell me what was going on that whole time
jeff 💩
because i wanna know
jackie 🍓
oh
jackie 🍓
um
jeff 💩
and you have to do it because you already said yes
jackierabbit to “the fruit bowl ✨🍒🍎🍍🥝🫐 ✨”
Wednesday, October 24, 3:01 P.M.
jackie 🍓
(insert screenshot)
jackie 🍓
im literally shaking this isn’t right
SHAUNA ❤️
Oh FUCK no
lottie 🦌
“your little gay friends” 💀
van 🔥
HELPP 😭
nat 🚬
i mean hes not wrong
travis 👾
DAMN i didnt know he was sassy
taissa ⚽️
It’s your choice, Jackie, add him if you want.
SHAUNA ❤️
No don’t do it
jackie 🍓
shauna please stop 😭
mari 💅
i say add him
mari 💅
ill GLADLY give him the tea
SHAUNA ❤️
I don’t like you
akilah 🪷
i honestly agree with mari
akilah 🪷
not the tea part but the adding him part
misty 🍄
I agree!!
crystal 🎶
Yeah maybe hes nice!!
SHAUNA ❤️
No please no
jackie 🍓
what did i JUST say
jackie 🍓
but yeah i think it would be best to add him
jackie 🍓
even tho its gonna be humiliating 😭
laura lee 😇
Please add him
laura lee 😇
I need to apologize to him
nat 🚬
what do YOU need to apologize for
laura lee 😇
Having Randy kiss him
lottie 🦌
lmao ll im sure hes not mad
van 🔥
i bet that little fruity patootie liked it
jackie 🍓
lmao no
jackie 🍓
jeffs like the straightest person i know
taissa ⚽️
Truthfully, that’s kind of an unfair comparison.
mari 💅
yeah you transferred your gayness to him by spit swapping
SHAUNA ❤️
Mari shut up before I make you shut up
mari 💅
😝
jackie 🍓
imagine if you can actually turn people gay like that
lottie 🦌
wed be too powerful
travis 👾
nat you would’ve actually made me bi
nat 🚬
maybe i already have 😈
melissa 🧢
oh yay MORE bisexuals
mari 💅
HELLLL YEAH
akilah 🪷
no offense to bisexuals
melissa 🧢
yeah no
melissa 🧢
it’s just that youre all usually emotionally unstable
SHAUNA ❤️
Okay so that’s not wrong
nat 🚬
it really isn’t
mari 💅
#ihateyoumelissa
jackie 🍓
okay im adding jeff now
SHAUNA ❤️
NO PLEASE
taissa ⚽️
Shauna, stop it.
jackierabbit has added mrjeffsadecki to “the fruit bowl ✨🍒🍎🍍🥝🫐 ✨”
jeff 💩
oh shit you actually did it
jackie 🍓
well you did kinda tell me i had to
jeff 💩
wasnt prepared for this tbh
SHAUNA ❤️
That’s okay you can leave
jeff 💩
oh hi shauna
taissa ⚽️
Ignore her, it’s okay.
van 🔥
yeah so thats taissa and im van
nat 🚬
im nat
nat 🚬
the 929 number is lottie
jackie 🍓
theyre a hive mind
gen 💫
if anyones a hive mind its you and shauna
jackie 🍓
thats gen
jeff 💩
im jeff
mari 💅
we know
misty 🍄
Im misty!!
jeff 💩
so what happened
akilah 🪷
okay so straight to the point
jackie 🍓
uh where exactly do you want us to start??
laura lee 😇
OH JEFF I’M SO SO SO SORRY
taissa ⚽️
And there’s Laura Lee.
jeff 💩
oh hi
jeff 💩
whats wrong
laura lee 😇
I DARED RANDY TO KISS YOU I’M SORRY I DID THAT
jeff 💩
oh no problem it was kinda fun
van 🔥
i know what you are.
jeff 💩
what?
van 🔥
nothing
jackie 🍓
okay so you said youd take me off the hook if i told you
jeff 💩
yes i did
jackie 🍓
so basically
jackie 🍓
a little while ago i realized i liked shauna
jackie 🍓
and by “realized” i mean lottie van and taissa bullied me into figuring it out
lottie 🦌
it was an intervention
taissa ⚽️
(insert screenshot)
taissa ⚽️
(insert screenshot)
van 🔥
im still so proud of how we did that to this day
SHAUNA ❤️
THAT’S how you did it??
misty 🍄
Thats actually kinda funny
jeff 💩
jackie why were you actually having a breakdown
jackie 🍓
NO I WASNT WHAT???
nat 🚬
“OH NOOOOOOOOO”
mari 💅
“IM IN LOVE WITH SHAUNA OH SHIIIIIT”
gen 💫
“IM A LESBIAN NOOONONONO”
travis 👾
dramatic ass
jackie 🍓
okay well they were harassing me
jackie 🍓
ANYWAY 💀
SHAUNA ❤️
Around that time I realized that I also like Jackie and Natalie helped me realize I was bisexual
nat 🚬
we all owe me i know
melissa 🧢
close your mouth no we dont
jackie 🍓
but i didnt think shauna liked girls or liked me at all
SHAUNA ❤️
And Jackie was dating Jeff so I was pretty sure I didn’t have a chance
jeff 💩
wait so you liked shauna while you were dating me
akilah 🪷
we listen and we dont judge
jackie 🍓
thank you akilah
jackie 🍓
youre letting me off the hook remember jeff
jeff 💩
yeah im starting to forget
taissa ⚽️
We did tell her it was best to break up with you as soon as she came to the conclusion, by the way.
lottie 🦌
(insert screenshot)
lottie 🦌
proof
van 🔥
yeah we were able to persuade her pretty quickly
jackie 🍓
by “persuade” you mean BULLIED ME AGAIN
lottie 🦌
its not bullying if its for a good cause
akilah 🪷
thats very questionable logic but i mean okay
SHAUNA ❤️
Wait fuck
SHAUNA ❤️
What was the next plot point
jackie 🍓
oh fuck
jackie 🍓
the party??
travis 👾
no bc a lot of shit happened before the party
mari 💅
im so fucking bad at timelines so im staying out of this
misty 🍄
Tai and van got together!
misty 🍄
And lottie and nat went on their nyc side quest
jackie 🍓
ohhhh yeah thats true
jackie 🍓
jeff do you gaf about that?
jeff 💩
what the rest of ur gay drama?
jackie 🍓
yeah pretty much
jeff 💩
i mean i guess???
SHAUNA ❤️
Doesn’t matter he’s hearing about it
van 🔥
damn okay 😭😭
gen 💫
shauna standing on BUSINESS
travis 👾
more like standing on pettiness but go off
jackie 🍓
shhhhh
jackie 🍓
tai and van, you wanna go ahead
van 🔥
yess indeed 😈
taissa ⚽️
So, at that time, I asked Van out to this café she loves but didn’t bring it up as a date or specify it as romantic.
lottie 🦌
(that last part ends up being important later)
jeff 💩
oh sweet jesus
van 🔥
and then when i texted tai later she said that she did NOT in fact think it was a date
nat 🚬
van freaked the fuck out and then BLOCKED tai immediately
melissa 🧢
she did WHAT??
jackie 🍓
yeah 😭
mari 💅
oh my DAAAAAYYYYYSSS
SHAUNA ❤️
Tai was also panic texting me
lottie 🦌
and me except it was mainly keysmashes
jackie 🍓
KEYSMASHES???
jackie 🍓
i didnt know tai could do that
jeff 💩
okay but why BLOCK her
van 🔥
I WAS FUCKING PANICKING
taissa ⚽️
We were BOTH fucking panicking!!
akilah 🪷
but was it THAT hard to say “look there’s been a misunderstanding, i actually really like you, can we talk?”
jackie 🍓
SHAUNA AND I SAID THE SAME THING 😭😭😭
SHAUNA ❤️
Although in hindsight we had NO right to say any of that
crystal 🎶
I was gonna say hypocrites??????
gen 💫
also akilah its because queers can’t communicate
jackie 🍓
i hate to agree
jackie 🍓
but also i think its just specific queers bc misty and crystal are fine
misty 🍄
Thats because pansexuals are a different breed
crystal 🎶
Amen to that
van 🔥
ANYWWWAAAAYYY tai and i avoided each other for a few days
taissa ⚽️
But I eventually got my shit together and confessed to her where I wasn’t blocked.
jackie 🍓
and by that she means in the public gc
SHAUNA ❤️
Like in our faces
melissa 🧢
taissa you have BALLS i wouldve SHOT myself
mari 💅
sounds like smth i would do
lottie 🦌
nat screen recorded it all
nat 🚬
(insert screenshot)
travis 👾
WILL be binging that
gen 💫
amen brotha
jackie 🍓
btw all this happened while lottie and nat were IN NEW YORK
lottie 🦌
yeah i asked nat if she wanted to go w me for the weekend
nat 🚬
and i gaslit myself into thinking it wasn’t a date
travis 👾
even though I KEPT TELLING HER IT WAS
laura lee 😇
And the Melissa thing
jackie 🍓
oh GOD
jackie 🍓
GOD NO
SHAUNA ❤️
You knew it was coming
jackie 🍓
yeah the melissa thing 💀
jeff 💩
what’s the melissa thing
mari 💅
it PHYSICALLY hurts
SHAUNA ❤️
Pretty shortly after Jackie planned her Halloween party Melissa asked me if we could go together but I said no
misty 🍄
And when i found out and told jackie i accidentally left out the part where shauna turned melissa down
jackie 🍓
which left me fully thinking that shauna was going out with melissa
jackie 🍓
and LYING about it on top of that
mari 💅
so like half of these problems would have been solved if misty had just yapped a little more
crystal 🎶
Truly fucking insane actually
misty 🍄
IMSOSORRYIMSOSORRY
jackie 🍓
NOOOOOO NONONO ITS OKAY
jackie 🍓
but also while i thought shauna said yes to melissa shauna was actually plotting to break us up
jeff 💩
shauna you were WHAT
SHAUNA ❤️
Yeah I got Laura Lee to help me with this plan I made to break you guys up at the party
mari 💅
i mean technically she succeeded but 😭
jeff 💩
also why the fuck would you get laura lees help
lottie 🦌
THATS WHAT I SAID
taissa ⚽️
That’s what we all said, honestly.
jackie 🍓
yeah none of us really understand
jackie 🍓
anyway at the party things kinda blew up
SHAUNA ❤️
That’s an understatement
jeff 💩
yeah i know i was there
jackie 🍓
i thought she was there with melissa and freaked the fuck out when she said she was planning to break us up
jackie 🍓
and i kinda had a panic attack and broke up with you
jackie 🍓
also i partly broke up with you because of the randy thing
melissa 🧢
i cant BELIEVE i missed that
jeff 💩
what
gen 💫
she walked into a wall and passed out
akilah 🪷
because of course she did
jackie 🍓
and because shauna and i were drunk and incapable of communicating we started arguing
SHAUNA ❤️
Luckily I puked so it cut off
gen 💫
“luckily” my ass
gen 💫
i had to wipe that shit up
jackie 🍓
oh god 💀
gen 💫
yep 💀
nat 🚬
meanwhile i made out with lottie in a bathroom and confessed to her and then ran away bc i was wasted
lottie 🦌
and i was also wasted so i just let her hightail it out of there sobbing like an idiot
van 🔥
which doubled the bullshit for me and travis of course
travis 👾
no literally they had us working overtime 😭
jackie 🍓
so pretty much everyone was depressed after the party
SHAUNA ❤️
Except Misty and Crystal who spent the whole time twirling around in their little Wicked costumes
misty 🍄
Hehe whoops
crystal 🎶
Sorry not sorry
van 🔥
a few days later i was able to bully lottie into texting nat
lottie 🦌
and i confessed to her and invited her over so we could talk
nat 🚬
she’s liked me for FOUR YEARS
travis 👾
we know 😭
jackie 🍓
lesbians stay winning
jeff 💩
yeah im seeing that
taissa ⚽️
Then I made this group chat to plan a way to get Jackie and Shauna to talk to each other.
van 🔥
first i came up with a plan to get laura lee to scream at shauna to communicate
laura lee 😇
I didn’t want to do it but they made me
SHAUNA ❤️
VAN THAT WAS YOU???
SHAUNA ❤️
But yeah that didn’t go too well
jackie 🍓
oh fuck i remember that 😭
jackie 🍓
yeah we just ended up arguing again
mari 💅
so then IIIIIII said we should have another party and get jackie and shauna to come
akilah 🪷
without telling them the other would be there
SHAUNA ❤️
Because of course they had to use mind games
jackie 🍓
because of course they had to be evil
mari 💅
and then we would rig a game of seven minutes in heaven to get them stuck in a closet until they talked it out
SHAUNA ❤️
Which we did
taissa ⚽️
And by that, she means they texted.
jeff 💩
no fucking way
nat 🚬
RIGHT???
jackie 🍓
but HEY we sorted our shit out
SHAUNA ❤️
We did
melissa 🧢
thank god
SHAUNA ❤️
And we made out
van 🔥
thank GOD
gen 💫
speaking of making out
melissa 🧢
CAN YOU STOP BRINGING THAT UP??
gen 💫
CAN YOU STOP AVOIDING IT??
melissa 🧢
JACKIE CHANGE THE SUBJECT
jackie 🍓
so shauna called jeff and randy to distract everyone so we could leave and go to shaunas house
jackie 🍓
and yeah thats how things are right now
SHAUNA ❤️
The whole story
van 🔥
jackie and shauna the saga
lottie 🦌
the romcom
nat 🚬
this is literally a fanfic
travis 👾
someone needs to make one
misty 🍄
Should me and crystal do it
crystal 🎶
OOOOOOOOOOH
taissa ⚽️
No.
mari 💅
YES
taissa ⚽️
NO.
jackie 🍓
to be fair tai this feels like a fanfic
SHAUNA ❤️
Yeah like Misty could change all of our names and post this and get like 10k hits on AO3
misty 🍄
Wait u know how ao3 works?
SHAUNA ❤️
Goodbye
lottie 🦌
SHAUNA AO3 USER CONFIRMED!!
travis 👾
😨😨😨😨
van 🔥
*le gasp*
nat 🚬
Oh GrEaT hEaVeNs
mari 💅
oh my word what a shock
gen 💫
right like i never would have seen it coming
SHAUNA ❤️
You’re mocking me
melissa 🧢
no shit sherlock
jackie 🍓
guys stop mocking her
SHAUNA ❤️
Thanks Jax
jackie 🍓
nppp
jackie 🍓
mwah 😘😘😘😘
SHAUNA ❤️
💕💕
travis 👾
wow okay just hit me in the head with a stick that says BITCHLESS on it why don’t you
jeff 💩
me but instead of a stick its a metal fucking chair
melissa 🧢
real bc when will it be my turn
gen 💫
wow okay
akilah 🪷
you did NOT just say that
mari 💅
mel use your brain cells challenge!!
van 🔥
level impossible!!!
melissa 🧢
what the hell are you talking abt
gen 💫
yk i might just stop talking to you
jackie 🍓
but you won’t
gen 💫
yeah
gen 💫
hey mari can you ignore melissa for me?
melissa 🧢
lmao she wont agree to that
mari 💅
five bucks.
gen 💫
deal.
melissa 🧢
WHAT THE FUCK?
akilah 🪷
LMAOAOAOAO
jeff 💩
WOW YALL ARE EVIL
nat 🚬
now JUST 5 dollars is foul
lottie 🦌
right like i wouldve gone for at least 15
mari 💅
im not picky
jackie 🍓
clearly 😭
jackie 🍓
someone check on melissa
mari 💅
5 bucks gets me a dr pepper and really thats all i need 😋
travis 👾
honestly real
travis 👾
i would give up nat for a monster
nat 🚬
motherfucker you would what
travis 👾
oh don’t play you would do the same thing
jackie 🍓
oh right you’re both monster addicts
SHAUNA ❤️
They’re just addicts in general
lottie 🦌
amen
taissa ⚽️
Don’t tell me Nat infected you.
laura lee 😇
Excellent choice of words
van 🔥
YEEEEEEES BULLY TAISSA 😈
jackie 🍓
NO BULLYING
laura lee 😇
Please!!
van 🔥
my bad queen
laura lee 😇
Queen
lottie 🦌
hell yeah
travis 👾
all hail laura lee
van 🔥
🛐🛐🛐🛐🛐🛐🛐
SHAUNA ❤️
If this group chat ever gets destroyed I wanna keep Laura Lee
jackie 🍓
HELLO?
SHAUNA ❤️
I wanna keep Laura Lee and Jackie
melissa 🧢
im shooting you all
jackie 🍓
YOURE BACK
akilah 🪷
i abused her into showing up again
melissa 🧢
yeah because MARI is refusing to talk to me
gen 💫
yeah she said she wont talk to you until you do something
jeff 💩
what does she need to do
gen 💫
she knows what
travis 👾
okay but like what
jeff 💩
you just expect her to know what to do before you even say it
gen 💫
yeah pretty much
jeff 💩
you women are weird
jackie 🍓
JEFF 😭
SHAUNA ❤️
EXCUSE me?
van 🔥
HELL YEAH WE ARE 🤠
lottie 🦌
we should not take pride in that but we do
misty 🍄
Maybe were not weird maybe youre just boring
jackie 🍓
PREACH MISTY
nat 🚬
i think women are weird but straight women are the weirdest
gen 💫
oh 100%
van 🔥
straight girls are scary
taissa ⚽️
Straight girls have something wrong with them, to somehow NOT be into women.
travis 👾
i think everyone is kinda into women
travis 👾
like in some way
mari 💅
right like how could they not
jeff 💩
exactly like have you SEEN women???
jackie 🍓
i respect you so much for that jeff
van 🔥
yeah jeff you’re surprisingly more chill than i expected
mari 💅
REAL!!
SHAUNA ❤️
I am pleasantly surprised that you’re so on board with this whole thing
jeff 💩
i mean im surprised by myself
akilah 🪷
why?
jeff 💩
my first girlfriend turned out to be a lesbian
travis 👾
thats rough buddy
jackie 🍓
WAIT.
lottie 🦌
YOU DID NOT JUST REFERENCE AVATAR RN
SHAUNA ❤️
STOP IT I JUST GOT PTSD WAR FLASHBACKS
gen 💫
HEAR ME OUT KATARA.
van 🔥
YES.
melissa 🧢
okay good to know we were all the same kind of freak in middle school
nat 🚬
wait hear me out zuko
nat 🚬
when he got hair
van 🔥
“when he got hair” 💀
taissa ⚽️
I mean, didn’t he have that atrocious hairstyle in, like, season one?
jackie 🍓
THE FUCKASS PONYTAIL 💀💀💀💀💀
mari 💅
nat i will GLADLY hear you out on zuko with hair
crystal 🎶
Oh hell yeah
SHAUNA ❤️
Undoubtedly
laura lee 😇
Who are we talking about I don’t know this show
misty 🍄
Search up “prince zuko from atla with good hair”
laura lee 😇
All right
laura lee 😇
Oh he’s cute
nat 🚬
RIGHT???
jackie 🍓
zuko and sokka were lowkey gorgeous and im saying that as a whole lesbian
travis 👾
STOP LMAO
jeff 💩
yeah they totally were
jeff 💩
esp zuko
jackie 🍓
…jeff?
van 🔥
jeff you realize the implications of that right 😨
jeff 💩
what isn’t it normal for kids to have crushes on cartoon characters
taissa ⚽️
You had a CRUSH on Zuko???
jeff 💩
isnt that normal kid stuff
mari 💅
normal QUEER kid stuff maybe???
jeff 💩
I AM NOT QUEER
SHAUNA ❤️
Jeff was Zuko your gay awakening?
jackie 🍓
JOIN US IN HELL JEFF
laura lee 😇
None of us are in hell!!
lottie 🦌
#jeffisgayforzuko
jeff 💩
I AM NOT GAY FOR ZUKO
Wednesday, October 24, 11:46 P.M.
jeff 💩
guys holy shit i think i was gay for zuko
jackie 🍓
jeff oh my FUCKING god
Notes:
see so i put “minor jeff sadecki inferiority” in the tags and now im making him part of the squad…it’s fine they’re making fun of him im not a hypocrite
they’re all so messy i actually love them, they were just doing too much this whole time lmao
also jeff at the end LMAOOOO that was inspired by my friend saying he thought 388 from squid game was fine but in a straight way. (he’s not straight)
Chapter 20: blah blah blah, chaos ensues (epilogue)
Summary:
yeah, remember how this was supposed to be about soccer? because i sure did. either way, that plotline is finished up real fast, and we get one last, final chapter of these goofy little shits just texting each other in their multipurpose group chat one more time. featuring one more party because what if i was lazy??? what then??
Notes:
AAAAAAAAAAND were here. the final chapter, this story is officially over!!!!
i expected like one person to read this only (hi lexi) but im actually so happy that people have enjoyed it!!! im working on more projects, but i am definitely going to write more yellowjackets fanfic in the future
this was probably the most fun thing ive ever written, and despite it being a total mess, im very very proud of it. i might go back and do some edits in a little while, but right now im kind of just happy i was able to make a story people actually liked
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
jackierabbit to “the fruit bowl ✨🍒🍎🍍🥝🫐 ✨”
Friday, October 26, 4:22 P.M.
jackie 🍓
so we lost
jackie 🍓
were not going to nationals
jeff 💩
oh nooo!!!
travis 👾
oh shit thats probably why my dad was kicking the wall when he got home today
travis 👾
thats so ass im sorry guys
crystal 🎶
That sucks im so sorry!!
misty 🍄
But you should still be proud of yourselves!!
misty 🍄
You all played really well!!
jackie 🍓
wait you were there
misty 🍄
Yeah you didnt see me??
misty 🍄
I recorded it
SHAUNA ❤️
Sorry you did WHAT
misty 🍄
Ill delete it
SHAUNA ❤️
Thank you
taissa ⚽
Thank you, Misty, I really do appreciate that.
van 🔥
(tai has been screaming and throwing a hissy fit since we got home)
jackie 🍓
of course she is its tai 😭
nat 🚬
like what do you expect 💀
lottie 🦌
tai i can try and put a hex on everyone on the other team if you want
taissa ⚽
Yes, please.
laura lee 😇
NO
laura lee 😇
The important part was that we worked as a team guys!!!
mari ✨
…
jackie 🍓
yeah ofc laura lee
gen 🌀
riiiiiiight
melissa 🧢
that team was fucking FAST
SHAUNA ❤️
Didn’t you get kicked in the head?
melissa 🧢
and in the boob
akilah 🍀
and in the stomach
taissa ⚽
Jesus, Melissa.
nat 🚬
what is it with you and always getting the shit beat out of you
melissa 🧢
im gods favorite masochist
jackie 🍓
now that is just a crazy sentence
akilah 🍀
weve said worse
jeff 💩
wait so like what happened??
lottie 🦌
we got our asses beat
laura lee 😇
Not really, it was a pretty close game
van 🔥
we lost 3 to 2
travis 👾
oh thats just shit
jackie 🍓
thats an understatement
crystal 🎶
So whatll you guys do now??
nat 🚬
well its not like the teams OVER well still have games and practices
taissa ⚽
Especially after Lottie puts that hex on the other team.
lottie 🦌
MUAHAHAHAHAHAH YEEEES 😈
laura lee 😇
NO!!! NO HEXES!!!!
van 🔥
idk one of those girls was lowkey evil
van 🔥
maybe we should hex them
SHAUNA ❤️
Nuh uh
jackie 🍓
no hexes okay
jackie 🍓
we can curse them out but no hexing them
jackie 🍓
i dont want any of you to go to jail
travis 👾
wait is there a law against hexing people
lottie 🦌
if there is im cooked
nat 🚬
charlotte what the fuck
van 🔥
damn not the full legal name
taissa ⚽️
The full legal name would be Charlotte Isobel Matthews.
taissa ⚽️
Who should NOT be hexing anyone at all, EVER.
melissa 🧢
isobel is a crazy ass middle name tbh
akilah 🪷
real like just say isabelle
lottie 🦌
it was my white dads idea
mari ✨
we can tell
crystal 🎶
So, just out of curiosity, how did the game go?
jackie 🍓
we lost
crystal 🎶
Beyond that 😭
nat 🚬
i did a bicycle kick
SHAUNA ❤️
Yeah it was honestly pretty incredible
laura lee 😇
It was how we scored our first goal!!
jackie 🍓
lottie actually screamed
lottie 🦌
brotha can you blame me
jeff 💩
what’s a bicycle kick
van 🔥
………
gen 💫
these men i swear
travis 👾
HELLO?
gen 💫
no i meant white men my bad g
jackie 🍓
shauna also beat one of the other girls to the ground
SHAUNA ❤️
I did not “beat her to the ground”
SHAUNA ❤️
Her face just accidentally fell into my elbow
taissa ⚽️
Several times.
SHAUNA ❤️
Mhm several times
mari ✨
i think melissa was our human shield
akilah 🪷
our sacrificial lamb
melissa 🧢
yeah i took all those blows for YALL 🫵
taissa ⚽️
And we STILL lost!!
van 🔥
there there babygirl
taissa ⚽️
…Never call me that again.
laura lee 😇
I’m giggling
jackie 🍓
van was incredible btw
nat 🚬
oh yeah she so was
van 🔥
awwwwwwwwwwww 🥰
lottie 🦌
yeah she was fucking contorting for that ball it was insane
laura lee 😇
I think we were all amazing!!
laura lee 😇
We really tried our best
taissa ⚽️
Yeah, that is true.
jackie 🍓
we really did all work our asses off there
crystal 🎶
Well i think mistys right!!
crystal 🎶
You all should be proud of yourselves
travis 👾
yeah like you don’t need to be happy about it but
travis 👾
at least you fucking ate
jeff 💩
i kinda wish i couldve been there tbh
jackie 🍓
that makes me feel
jackie 🍓
slightly better?
taissa ⚽️
Not for me it doesn’t.
SHAUNA ❤️
I think I’m too fucking exhausted from that game to feel anything atp
nat 🚬
okay edgelord
lottie 🦌
and think of it like this
lottie 🦌
maybe it’s a good thing we’re not going to nationals
jackie 🍓
lottie what
travis 👾
…que
lottie 🦌
like just imagine that something really bad would happen if we went
lottie 🦌
like the plane would crash and we’d get stranded or some shit
SHAUNA ❤️
Yeah it would be like Lord Of The Flies
jackie 🍓
why are you playing along with this
SHAUNA ❤️
I mean it’s a fun idea think about it
jackie 🍓
cannot believe you’re asking me to think
SHAUNA ❤️
I put too much faith in you
nat 🚬
yeah and since lotties a cult leader now she’d turn us into a cult
mari ✨
i think we would end up eating each other
jeff 💩
that’s morbid
mari ✨
do not question how crazy a soccer team of queers can get
gen 💫
plus you wouldn’t even be there
akilah 🪷
travis would be tho bc of his dad
travis 👾
yeah id probably kms if i was stuck with all of you
jackie 🍓
i think id die
SHAUNA ❤️
NO
nat 🚬
yeah lowkey you’d be cannibalized first
mari ✨
yeah i feel like id die too
gen 💫
you talk too much shit to live so
van 🔥
i dont think i would die
nat 🚬
girl be so fr you would accidentally light on fire
taissa ⚽
Accidentally walk into a pack of wolves.
jackie 🍓
accidentally get caught in the plane and slow cook
travis 👾
jackie bffr youre the one getting slow cooked
van 🔥
nah bro im unkillable
van 🔥
yall keep THINKING im dead but I aLwAyS cOmE bAcK
misty 🍄
WAS THAT A FNAF REFERENCE???
van 🔥
YUHHHHHHHH
crystal 🎶
YAYAYAYAYAY
jeff 💩
im just not part of this
jackie 🍓
shauna can tell you the tea when we get rescued
lottie 🦌
wait why is shauna telling him the tea
jackie 🍓
because im dead
lottie 🦌
ohhhhhhh right
nat 🚬
yeah keep up lottie
gen 🌀
yeah LOTTIE
akilah 🪷
Give her a break shes a cult leader
misty 🍄
So who else would die??
taissa ⚽
Careful, you kinda sound like a sociopath.
laura lee 😇
I think I would
nat 🚬
yeah youd dip out right before we started doing the murder and cannibalism
jackie 🍓
good for her i mean
SHAUNA ❤️
Yeah and she’d probably die for some really sweet reason too
SHAUNA ❤️
Like trying to help us get rescued or smth
laura lee 😇
lottie if I die you better wear my old clothes
lottie 🦌
you got it ll
nat 🚬
i have many thoughts about that
crystal 🎶
I honestly think id die too
misty 🍄
PLEASE NO
jackie 🍓
youd be like laura lee i feel like
crystal 🎶
Nah my death would be stupid as hell
crystal 🎶
It would be something stupid like eating a poison mushroom
akilah 🪷
youd slip off a cliff
crystal 🎶
You know what never mind i would totally do that
lottie 🦌
see but none of that is happening because we didnt make it to nationals
taissa ⚽
Honestly, that distraction helped, I’m not too mad about it anymore.
van 🔥
see if it can get tai to chill then you KNOW its good
SHAUNA ❤️
So let’s just go with “it’s a good thing we didn’t go to Nationals because our plane didn’t crash”
nat 🚬
and leave it at that
travis 👾
my dad probably wont roll with that but tbh he can suffer
mari ✨
damn right he can
jackie 🍓
you know what
jackie 🍓
all of you are sleeping over at my house tonight
SHAUNA ❤️
Fuck yeah
van 🔥
wait your house??
melissa 🧢
i mean its def big enough
jackie 🍓
the drama peaked at my house and its ending at my house
jackie 🍓
also it can multitask as a halloween party since its almost halloween
lottie 🦌
me and nat are coming
nat 🚬
ugh FINE
travis 👾
(that means she actually really wants to go)
travis 👾
(and im also going too)
jeff 💩
am i also invited?
SHAUNA ❤️
No
jackie 🍓
of course as long as youre comfortable
taissa ⚽
Van and I are coming as well.
van 🔥
YUPPPPPPPP
laura lee 😇
My parents aren’t going to be home this weekend, so I don’t think they’ll mind
mari ✨
YESSSSS REBEL LAURA LEE 😈
akilah 🪷
were all coming too
gen 🌀
who is we
akilah 🪷
the four of us
gen 🌀
uh no
melissa 🧢
yes
gen 🌀
fine
jackie 🍓
THE IMMEDIATE FOLDING 💀
misty 🍄
I think its safe to say were all going??
crystal 🎶
Yup!!
jackie 🍓
oh btw everyone keep shauna off aux
SHAUNA ❤️
WHAT THE HELL
van 🔥
yeah we cant handle your emo music
travis 👾
EMO MUSIC?????
nat 🚬
travis your music taste really isnt much better
travis 👾
im sorry WHAT
travis 👾
I LISTEN TO TYLER THE CREATOR AND KENDRICK LAMAR WHATS WRONG WITH THAT
akilah 🪷
i like sza do you like sza
travis 👾
i fucking love sza
akilah 🪷
YES YES YES YES
akilah 🪷
mari im breaking up with you
mari ✨
WHAT 😭💔
taissa ⚽
I’m guessing that means I can’t play my music either?
jackie 🍓
your music is kinda emo too so yes
SHAUNA ❤️
Okay but we both listen to kinda upbeat songs???
taissa ⚽
I mean, I do, I don’t know about Shauna.
crystal 🎶
How about we all take turns playing our music?
gen 🌀
that sounds fine
mari ✨
MUAHAHAHAHAHA AYESHA EROTICA ATTACK
jackie 🍓
GET READY FOR HOURS OF TAYLOR SWIFT PEOPLE
nat 🚬
and arctic monkeys and fleetwood mac
lottie 🦌
wait are misty and crystal gonna be playing their kpop
misty 🍄
You bet!!!
crystal 🎶
Misty really likes katseye which isnt really kpop but theyre def gonna be playing
jackie 🍓
one second im looking them up
jackie 🍓
OH MY GOD THEY ARE SO GORGEOUS
misty 🍄
RIGHT?????
jackie 🍓
i love women.
taissa ⚽
Truer words have never been spoken.
lottie 🦌
i love women too twin
van 🔥
everyone loves women
misty 🍄
Crystals favorite is nct
crystal 🎶
YES just dont look them up
nat 🚬
you cant say that and expect me not to look them up
jackie 🍓
watch her get traumatized
nat 🚬
why the fuck are there like two hundred of them???
crystal 🎶
Told you
jeff 💩
i have the best music taste here so
jackie 🍓
jeff i caught benson boone on your playlist dont play
van 🔥
FUCKING BENSON BOONE 💀💀💀💀💀
mari ✨
mOoNbEaM iCe CrEaM-
gen 🌀
*gunshots*
jeff 💩
SHUT UPPPPPP
lottie 🦌
I mean we DID say everyone would get to play their music
SHAUNA ❤️
Okay but Jeff doesn’t count
jackie 🍓
shauna lets not be rude
SHAUNA ❤️
But I wanna be rude
nat 🚬
shauna can you not be petty for like one second
lottie 🦌
i really dont think she can
travis 👾
jackie what time should we get to your house??
jackie 🍓
uhhhhh lets say by 9??
travis 👾
brb imma go bribe javi not to tell my dad
taissa ⚽
Not tell your dad what?
travis 👾
that im going to sneak out of my window into natalies car
mari ✨
me w akilahs car
mari ✨
my mom would whip out her sandals if she found out i was leaving
gen 🌀
hispanic parents core
gen 🌀
(yes i know that because of all the time i spend at maris house)
jackie 🍓
see you guys then!!
fleetwoodlottie to “the fruit bowl ✨🍒🍎🍍🥝🫐 ✨”
Saturday, October 27, 12:41 P.M.
lottie 🦌
i am never touching alcohol again
melissa 🧢
my head feels like a balloon
taissa ⚽
I fucking hate people.
mari ✨
I FUCKING HATE SPIDERS
taissa ⚽
Don’t interrupt my mental breakdown.
misty 🍄
Awwww our crawly little friends
jackie 🍓
FRIENDS?????
mari ✨
I JUST GOT ASSAULTED BY ONE OF YOUR “crawly little friends” FOR NO REASON
akilah 🪷
by “assaulted” do you mean it like actually attacked you or it just existed in your vicinity??
mari ✨
baby please kill it
laura lee 😇
No it’s a living thing!! Treat it how you want to be treated!!!
mari ✨
violently banged into the wall???
van 🔥
ayo?????
mari ✨
no not like that
mari ✨
well
mari ✨
yeah also like that
jackie 🍓
so i take it last night wasnt very fun??
nat 🚬
it was fun it was just
SHAUNA ❤️
Very chaotic
travis 👾
yeah exactly
gen 🌀
did anyone get lost on the way to her house or was it just me??
crystal 🎶
What
melissa 🧢
fuckin idiot
lottie 🦌
guys melissa is sooooo sweet she held my hair while i was puking
jackie 🍓
all of it??
lottie 🦌
tfym all of it
taissa ⚽
You have a lot of hair, Lottie.
melissa 🧢
well i held all of it
van 🔥
are you just ignoring me
lottie 🦌
stfu you sat in the bathtub and played subway surfers you didnt help
van 🔥
that was me contributing
melissa 🧢
it was basically just a weird ass bonding experience
jackie 🍓
thank you for your service
jackie 🍓
and for dealing with lotties fuck ass hair
misty 🍄
I didnt get lost on the way there but i did get lost on the way back
nat 🚬
was it that cheap weed we bought from britt last week
misty 🍄
Mmmmmmmmmaybe
crystal 🎶
MISTY WE TALKED ABOUT THIS
misty 🍄
IT WAS FOR THE MOOD
SHAUNA ❤️
If it helps I did some weed too
jackie 🍓
it absolutely does NOT help
jackie 🍓
shauna wtf
SHAUNA ❤️
Whoops
nat 🚬
i didnt do any weed believe it or not
jeff 💩
yeah because you were spending the whole time in the bathroom with lottie
lottie 🦌
not THE WHOLE TIME
lottie 🦌
we were waiting for the right moment
taissa ⚽
What was “the right moment?”
jeff 💩
the scary part of the movie
nat 🚬
stfu white boy
akilah 🪷
its a shame tho you missed the best part
gen 🌀
yeah seeing jackie scream and jump into shaunas lap was the best thing that happened that night
SHAUNA ❤️
She literally would not get off of me for the rest of the night
jackie 🍓
IT WAS SCARY OKAY YOU CANT BLAME ME
van 🔥
aaaaaaaaand you wanted an excuse to hug shauna
jackie 🍓
shhhhhh
mari ✨
btw i recorded it
SHAUNA ❤️
You what.
jackie 🍓
mari
jackie 🍓
mari please delete it
mari ✨
nope 😜
SHAUNA ❤️
Mari Ibarra I will kill you
akilah 🪷
okay can we please not
misty 🍄
Lets focus on the positive
laura lee 😇
We survived!!! Yay!!!
taissa ⚽
Normally, I would say that that’s not something to celebrate, but we’re in a day and age where people post thirst traps over convicted serial killers, so I’d say it’s fair.
nat 🚬
someones gonna miss writing essays
taissa ⚽
It’s just facts.
lottie 🦌
iTs JuSt FaCtS 🤓👆
taissa ⚽
Please, if anyone’s the nerd emoji here, it’s Misty.
misty 🍄
HELLO???
melissa.hatgirl to “the fruit bowl ✨🍒🍎🍍🥝🫐 ✨”
Monday, October 29, 4:22 P.M.
melissa 🧢
soooo gen and i are dating
gen 🌀
at long last
jackie 🍓
OH MY GOD????
mari ✨
YES YES YES YES FINALLY AHFUHJSKSHNKGH
SHAUNA ❤️
Sorry WHAT???
van 🔥
DETAILS THIS SECOND.
lottie 🦌
I FUCKING KNEW IT
travis 👾
…fym you knew it
nat 🚬
babe your psychic abilities are getting a little unnerving
jackie 🍓
TELL US!!
akilah 🪷
is that why gen texted me at like 1 am screaming
gen 🌀
SHUT THE HELL UP
misty 🍄
WHAT HAPPENED???
melissa 🧢
okay so she asked me if i wanted to come over to her house and i said yeah
gen 🌀
for like a sleepover
melissa 🧢
and when i get there shes acting weird and im like okay why tf???
gen 🌀
and at some point when were both like fully wasted i get up and get on aux
van 🔥
HELL NO NOT AUX 💀
taissa ⚽
Like, music?
jackie 🍓
yeah thats what aux is taissa 😭
melissa 🧢
so she proceeds to play fucking TREAT YOU BETTER
jeff 💩
BY SHAWN MENDES?????
travis 👾
IM LAUGHING SO HARD WTF
gen 🌀
and i just turn around and look at her and i go “i know you really really dont wanna talk about the fact that we kissed at that party but i really do wanna talk about it”
melissa 🧢
she also said “and ik you like shauna but i just kind of wish you’d wake the fuck up at some point”
lottie 🦌
DAMN?????????
akilah 🪷
why does everyone in our friend group do unnecessarily long and dramatic love confessions
jackie 🍓
because youre gay
SHAUNA ❤️
Yeah it’s like a rite of passage
gen 🌀
and then melissa just said “oh”
melissa 🧢
i fucking FOLDED
melissa 🧢
like not literally
melissa 🧢
but the internal “i just saw ruby cruz on my screen” type folding
crystal 🎶
OH MY GODDDDD
jackie 🍓
NOT RUBY CRUZ HELP
nat 🚬
real asf
melissa 🧢
but um i was too put off by my internal folding that i just started pretending i had no idea what she was talking about
gen 🌀
and i was too drunk to pick up on it so i just kept talking
SHAUNA ❤️
This soccer team just loves drunk confessions
travis 👾
cough cough nat
gen 🌀
so i pretty much said something like “i like you so much and youre really pretty and funny and i kinda wanna kiss you all the time actually”
melissa 🧢
and i said “okay”
gen 🌀
i just stared at her
melissa 🧢
and then what she said actually hit me
gen 🌀
and then we started making out
jackie 🍓
hallelujah????
mari ✨
my thoughts exactly
gen 🌀
and then right before we went to sleep i asked her to be my girlfriend
melissa 🧢
and i said no and then fucking passed out
taissa ⚽
What the fuck??
jeff 💩
who in their right mind does that
nat 🚬
melissa clearly
lottie 🦌
i mean i kinda did a variant of that 😭
melissa 🧢
but then i woke her up at like three am and said yes ill be your girlfriend
gen 🌀
and i pushed her off the bed
SHAUNA ❤️
Valid
jackie 🍓
shes only saying that because she pushes me off her bed several times
SHAUNA ❤️
Not my fault you kick in your sleep
taissa ⚽
Van drools.
van 🔥
shut up no i dont
travis 👾
gang we did it
jeff 💩
sorry what did we do
misty 🍄
No more unresolved feelings in this group chat!!!!
lottie 🦌
wait thats actually true
jackie 🍓
WE DID IT!!!!
laura lee 😇
Hooray!!
nat 🚬
so wait are we like done???
akilah 🪷
wdym done?
nat 🚬
done with nationals
nat 🚬
done with slow burns
nat 🚬
done with ex drama
SHAUNA ❤️
You know what?
SHAUNA ❤️
I kinda think we are
taissa ⚽
I find that a little hard to believe.
van 🔥
i dont
lottie 🦌
i mean all our main conflicts are kind of resolved
travis 👾
the reason why we made this gc is fixed
jackie 🍓
reasonSSSSSS
jackie 🍓
me AND shauna
mari ✨
nah you and shauna are one
misty 🍄
Youre a package deal
jeff 💩
a hive mind
SHAUNA ❤️
They’re kinda right
jackie 🍓
well fuck
crystal 🎶
I only joined this group by the end and im still happy the dramas done
jeff 💩
same
taissa ⚽
Jeff, you were a crucial part of the drama the whole time, Crystal wasn’t.
jeff 💩
AGAINST MY WILL
jackie 🍓
at least we were able to fix it??
akilah 🪷
doesnt mean it wasnt insane
lottie 🦌
it wouldve been insane either way
van 🔥
yeah everyone in this gc is insane in some way
nat 🚬
speak for yourself this drama has made me insane
misty 🍄
At least itll be a really cool fanfic at some point
crystal 🎶
Are we still making that?
misty 🍄
Of course
mari ✨
send that to me
misty 🍄
You got it!!
SHAUNA ❤️
You better change our names
jackie 🍓
hey shauna i am so telling our future kids this story
taissa ⚽
Future KIDS???
van 🔥
hell yeah 😏
lottie 🦌
tell me and nats kids the story too
nat 🚬
please dont i dont want them to hear how stupid i was
SHAUNA ❤️
Jackie are you saying that we’re still gonna be together by the time we’re crusty old ladies??
jackie 🍓
of course i am
jackie 🍓
youre not getting away from me that easy shauna shipman
SHAUNA ❤️
Sorry for even suggesting it Jackie Taylor
jackie 🍓
youre stuck with me
SHAUNA ❤️
Yes I am
SHAUNA ❤️
And thank God
Notes:
--the end.
thank you so much for reading this story!! this is officially the first fanfiction i have ever published AND finished and i am kind of proud of myself for that lmao, but i probably wouldve given up at like chapter 7 if it werent for those people enjoying this and leaving kudos and comments, so i do wanna say thank you for that and i hope this fic was as good/funny as i was attempting to make it!!
right now im writing an it fanfic, so if youre in that fandom too i really hope youll check it out, and once thats done i am DEFINITELY getting back on yj fics because i love these little guys and writing about them
that being said, this chapter officially concludes "smells like teen spirit (the wiskayok apocalypse); thank you for enjoying!!
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n1mariibarraglazer on Chapter 1 Wed 16 Apr 2025 10:54PM UTC
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NAT (Guest) on Chapter 1 Mon 30 Jun 2025 07:21PM UTC
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J_Kinrema87 on Chapter 1 Tue 08 Jul 2025 12:09PM UTC
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iamspiderman346 on Chapter 1 Mon 18 Aug 2025 10:30PM UTC
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twigarmtwilightassbitch on Chapter 1 Tue 19 Aug 2025 01:28AM UTC
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danbito on Chapter 2 Sat 05 Apr 2025 10:03PM UTC
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cerealb0y on Chapter 2 Sat 05 Apr 2025 10:18PM UTC
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SoftSapphic (Jazz4045) on Chapter 2 Sun 06 Apr 2025 02:36AM UTC
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Deck_of_Destiny on Chapter 2 Mon 07 Apr 2025 11:02AM UTC
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supportingwomenswrongs on Chapter 2 Thu 10 Apr 2025 06:53AM UTC
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J_Kinrema87 on Chapter 2 Tue 08 Jul 2025 12:16PM UTC
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