Chapter Text
━━ ACT I: How to Recognize That You Have a Crush on Someone
♡ Chapter 1: Defining a Crush
⸜(｡˃ ᵕ ˂ )⸝♡
CLOSED: Dining hall cleanup in process due to unruly food fight. Reflect on your behavior and eat somewhere else.
— EU Staff
The sign that greeted the group makes Blue grimace, remembering what had gone down recently. A food fight? In university?
How irresponsible, he thought to himself disappointedly. Surely his fellow students know better.
What had even caused it…? Oh yes, a student throwing coffee on Ink, and before anyone knew it, desserts and burgers were flying across the room.
"Ya know what that means," Alphys grins, slinging her arms around Blue and Undyne. "We're going out!"
Undyne's eyes widen at the contact and she nods sheepishly. "Good idea…"
Stretch, his dear brother, merely shrugs in agreement and follows the rest, with Napstaton and Mettablook.
⸜(｡˃ ᵕ ˂ )⸝♡
By out, Alphys had meant an area that skirted the university: the Ebott University Park. A few food trucks had settled near the campus, benefitting a lot from the many hungry students. And deservedly so! The tacos sold here are divine.
Blue also enjoys the warmth of the sun, the rustle of the winds.
They find a nearby picnic table and take their seats. Stretch and Mettablook settle comfortably next to him, and Alphys, Undyne, and Napstaton sit across from them.
This is one of Blue's favorite spots. It's so peaceful and—
He spots someone near the corner of his vision: a fellow Baking Club member laughing with their friends. If he recalls correctly, they're also an art major.
…
His favorite spot just got even better! It's… oddly nice seeing them aroun—
"Blueeee, bluey? Ya listenin'?" Alphys waves a hand in front of him.
He briefly flinches. "Ah, Sorry! I Was Distracted."
The group exchanges a look to each other that he can't define.
"Distracted by what, mm?" Napstaton leans in closer, with that cheesy grin that always means no good.
Blue picks at his salad for a bit, before totally smoothly replying, "No Need To Worry, Friends, It's Nobody!"
They all exchange another look. A conspiratorial look.
Oh stars.
"..U-um, Napstaton n-never mentioned some-body," Mettablook notes, now looking more interested in the conversation.
The air shifts. Despite the warmth of the spring afternoon, Blue feels the need for a jacket. A very big jacket. One that would cover him entirely.
"is someone bothering you…? because that can be handled." Stretch suggests.
"Yea!" Alphys agrees, hand clenching. "Look, if we need to fight someone for ya, just tell us. Anyone who wrongs you, wrongs us, and—"
While his SOUL warms up with joy at their love, Blue holds his hands up. "It's Not That! I'm Fine."
"Then what is it?"
Blue ponders. Either he can tell them about his… situation, and get advice from the ones he loves, or he can take the secret to his grave and die. Choices, choices. Usually he's so forward about this... Why is he hesitating then?
"Is it a crush?" Undyne asks, not looking up from her manga.
"Pfft, that's silly, why would he have a—" Alphys laughs, before noticing Blue's stretched silence.
Everyone's eyes are on him.
Undyne looks up from her manga, eyes sparkling. "Is it?"
He blushes in a shade of blue. Suddenly, his salad looks very interesting. "Well.. I.."
She loudly squeaks in glee. "Oooo! You so do!"
A few curious eyes momentarily shift to their picnic table. Including the person's eyes.
Alphys gently places her hand on Undyne's shoulder. "Calm down, Alphy."
Undyne squeaks again, much more quietly. "R-right!"
Blue is still focused on his very enticing and non-confrontational salad. He does not like where this is going. Not at all.
"Sooo! Who's the lucky gal? Guy? Person? Are they a human? Monster? We don't judge!" Napstaton inquires, with eyes too bright and eager to hear his response.
Blue's words are lost as he meets the (very) unwanted stares of his friends. He goes over a series of scripted denials in his mind— no, it's not a crush. No, it's just an old friend.
And then the fates intervene in the worst way possible. The person and their friends stand up, passing by their table as they talk about something Blue isn't really focused on. His eyelights foolishly glance at them as they walk by.
It's a moment of weakness that even Mettablook notices. "Which one of.. that group?"
He blushes even more. If he tries really hard, maybe he can will himself out of here.
Undyne begins listing the names of the people from the group, stopping when noticing Blue's slow response to denying one of them. "Ooooo!"
"my little bro has a crush?" Stretch teases, nudging Blue.
Oh stars.
"I-I Don't Know If I Do," Blue finally musters a reply, picking even more at his salad. His fork is going through it.
Napstaton dramatically claps twice. "Not to worry, dear. Coincidentally, I have just created a brand, new, amazing, crush course that is guaranteed to make them like you!"
"Is this just another one of your useless WikiHow guides?" Alphys points one of her chopsticks accusingly at him.
"Hey, my guides are working for you, aren't they? Just look at you and Und—"
Alphys glares at Napstaton sharply, gripping her chopsticks more tightly. "Nobody needs to know about any of that."
"His.. his guides are nice… T-they help me with my stories.." Mettablook shyly adds, earning a prideful grin from Napstaton.
"Exactly!" Napstaton declares, his giant ego stroked even more. "Now, Stretch, you will be my assistant for this bit. Be a dear and look up the definition of crush for me?"
What is happening? Blue tries to protest. This really isn't necessary. "Napstaton, Friend, I Never Exactly Agreed To This Course And—"
"Hush, hush! I'm trying to fix your love life here. "
"urban dictionary says a crush is 'a burning desire to be with someone who you find attractive and extremely special'." Stretch reads from his phone.
Napstaton scoffs. "Yes, that's— what? Did you get the definition from Urban Dictionary?"
"yes."
"Why?"
"it appeared first and i didn't wanna scroll."
Napstaton sighs then turns back to Blue. "So! Do you feel that?"
Blue thinks about it. A burning desire? He doesn't know. Someone he finds attractive and special? Well, they do look amazing… And they are a very talented artist…
"The Definition Has Some Merit," Blue tries to say as plainly as possible. Does his voice sound too excited?
"Excellent! Now, referring to my beautiful and flawless guide—" Alphys scoffs at that but Napstaton continues on. "—which I have titled How to Recognize That You Have a Crush on Someone, there's different types of crushes! Perhaps you simply admire them, or you want to be their friend. Or, the fun one, you feel romance in the air!"
"..And How Am I Supposed to Figure That Out?"
Napstaton grins at that, standing up. "For that, the first experiment will commence! Everyone, meet me outside of my dorm at exactly 1:43 PM tomorrow."
"Um… do we have to? I have a writer's club meeting tomorrow." Mettablook fidgets side to side.
"Dear, wouldn't you want to get hands-on experience for your romance novel? That's better than any hypotheticals. Firm, raw, real love!"
Blue wants to vanish. Leave. Right now.
However, Napstaton's words quickly convince the shy ghost, who nods.
Alphys puts her hand on Undyne's shoulder, replying, "We'll definitely be there."
"i'll always be there for my bro, so count me in." Sretch says, idly typing something onto his phone.
Blue glances to see that Stretch is setting up a reminder on his calendar app for the meeting. With various typos, but still a reminder.
Napstaton gently smiles at Blue. "How does all this sound? Are you in?"
This is becoming more and more real. Is Blue really going to do this? Follow some WikiHow guided course and hope for the best? Is it even worth it? Of course it is.
"Yes," Blue replies. "Thank You."
Undyne giggles to herself, clutching her manga in excitement.