Work Text:
“Why does my boyfriend seem so upset in the morning when we wake up?” Scrolling through countless pages and websites with a hand on his head, Donghyuck continued to read the many replies to the reddit post that had caught his eye. “Maybe awful sleep, or not a morning person?” “It could be due to so many factors: 1. he has nightmares 2. he doesn’t want to face the day and go to work 3. he’s depressed or going through something 4. he’s just not a morning person or has a hangover.” “Have you tried asking him? Some possibilities are low quality sleep, stress or anxiety, health issues, or hormonal changes.”
All of the answers were somehow repetitive and nothing new that Donghyuck himself hadn’t considered. It had been a while since his boyfriend had started acting strangely frustrated in the mornings and it was slowly getting on his nerves.
He had known Jeno for more than a decade, and he could doubtlessly say that he was the most gentle person he’d ever met. Not only through Donghyuck’s eyes, but those who were close to him or knew him from around also agreed on this invariable fact that he was the perfect embodiment of the word ‘gentleman.’ However, the boy had always been a bit… you could say sensitive in the mornings, which was adorable to Donghyuck and encouraged him to rile him up more. No matter how much of a brat he would be, though, Jeno never really snapped at him or did more than knit his fine brows together—which had a huge effect on Donghyuck and was the only thing that made him back down.
It was different now. And well, they were different now. They were no longer the kids who would chase each other throughout the entire SM building only to mess with each other in a chaotic and childish manner. And not the teens who went through 127 stages of denial before they finally came to terms with themselves and acknowledged that their feelings weren’t ‘no homo’ anymore and they were undoubtedly attracted to each other.
They were dating for 10 months and 22 days now, and it had been a real life experience of heaven for both of them. Maybe it was thanks to Jeno’s mature and patient nature, or the ecstasy of their honeymoon phase after a long hellish journey of pining, but there hadn’t been any real trouble in their paradise until now. Jeno was pushing him away in the mornings, and he was done dealing with it.
“What are you reading?” Jeno’s gentle voice touched his ears and it was enough to make Donghyuck pout. He was both delighted and upset to hear it at the moment. They had a long schedule today and a bad morning because of Jeno’s temper, so they didn’t get the chance to spend some time together and even though they were basically side by side all day everywhere, Donghyuck ridiculously missed him so much he felt like sobbing when he felt Jeno’s bare chest leaning against his back and his veiny arms wrapped around his small figure.
He closed the black MacBook and slightly leaned forward to put it on the bedside table, but before he could, Jeno grabbed it from his hands and did it for him without letting go of him.
Donghyuck kept quiet and still in his embrace as Jeno tightened his grip on him and nosed his neck, sighing in comfort and closing his eyes. “Don’t you wanna take a shower?”
“Why? Do I stink? Is that why you refuse me?”
Jeno’s eyes opened slightly wide, surprised by the sudden irritation in his boyfriend’s tone. “Of course not, that’s not what I meant. You know I’m addicted to your scent,” he pressed a long and deep kiss on the corner near his ear, evoking a slight jerk from him, “When did I refuse you?”
“You pushed me away when I tried to hug you in the morning but you seemed to enjoy Jaemin’s hug a lot later during the show.” Donghyuck tried to sound nonchalant, but his small voice failed him.
“Aww, is my princess jealous?” Jeno looked up to meet Donghyuck’s sulky face and a gentle smile formed on his lips.
Donghyuck tsked, turning his head to look back at Jeno’s sickeningly sweet eyes. “Your princess? Isn’t that what you call Jaemin?”
“You know it’s different when I call you that.” Jeno kissed his nose button and Donghyuck almost gave in, his heart furiously pumping and yelling at him to stop the talk and just enjoy his man’s touch, but his stubborn mind pushed him over.
“Is it, really?”
“Well, I don’t do this to anyone else,” he gave his soft, plump lips a lingering peck and got a hold of Donghyuck’s hand to interlock it with his before continuing, “Do I?”
Donghyuck could feel his throat tightening at the gesture and his lips got even poutier. His eyes were shimmering with satisfaction and sadness at the same time and it did something to Jeno’s heart. Donghyuck’s eyes had always been his weakness, and he hated to see them like this.
“What’s wrong, my love?” Jeno questioned softly, brushing his thumb over the younger’s knuckles, worry evident in his gaze. It made Donghyuck want to cry—not because he was mad at him, but because it was harder than teaching quantum physics to a four year old to stay mad at Jeno, and because he wanted nothing more than to curl himself into his arms and kiss him all night long. Jeno was hugging him, but he still so-achingly missed him.
“I hate you,” he muttered, a single tear escaping his eyes and rolling down his flushed cheek. He wasn’t a crybaby— far from it to be clear. But ever since dating Jeno, he would often find himself crying in many places and endless positions. On their bed, trapped against the wall, hands on the shower’s glass, locked inside an empty fitting room in the middle of concert rehearsal, against the kitchen counter, and more. You see, Jeno had two sides with him. He would only go completely brutal and feral on him, or madly gentle and romantic; there was no in-between. Either way, Donghyuck always ended up crying— overwhelmed by the enormously amorous and passionate love Jeno had to give him.
Right now, though, he was tearing up for another reason. He missed waking up to Jeno cuddling him tightly from behind and peppering kisses all over his face before starting their day together. He missed teasing him in the backseat of the van, sitting on his lap, kissing his frowning forehead and holding his hand. He missed putting on a little aegyo show for him while eating their favorite breakfast to watch his mood slowly brighten up until they were all wrapped up in each other for the rest of the day.
Most importantly, he missed him. It sounded simple, but he really, madly, feverishly, deeply, and utterly missed his Jeno and wished time would stop to let them breathe each other in, to tangle in the fervent love that was ruling every facet of their being, and to become one another’s one and only cosmos. It was the same for Jeno, he could see it in the way he would restlessly try to stand closer to him during schedules and not-so secretly yearned to lock their pinkies together, and how exhaustion visibly and immediately left his overworked muscles with a brief touch from him, or how his eyes lit up whenever he saw Donghyuck’s smile across a big, crowded room.
He was still the same Jeno—the one who, no matter what, would always find the time to buy Donghyuck’s favorite drinks and snacks and hand them to him with small notes of love confessions. “Smile my little sunlight,” he would say, “Bésame Mucho,” he would demand. The same Jeno who would press a heartfelt kiss to his knuckles between practice runs when no cameras were on them, and the same Jeno who would end every night on his knees with a new flower for Donghyuck, rest his head on Donghyuck’s stomach, hug his waist with closed eyes, and whisper love into his skin.
His apartment was a garden now—no exaggeration. It was filled with colorful blooms in different shapes and sizes from almost all corners of the world. Courtesy of a man who willingly, confidently, and devotedly knelt before the love of his life to remind him every night that he was the one his lovesick heart bowed to—and will always be the only one.
“Are you gonna keep doing this?” Donghyuck had asked him one month into dating, after adding the 31st flower to the vase on his bedside table and caressing Jeno’s velvety hair as the man kept nuzzling his clothed stomach and inhaled his scent, knees bent on the floor. “Yeah, if you don’t mind,” he had replied, to which Donghyuck had smiled, “Of course I don’t, silly, but aren’t you gonna get tired of doing this every day?” Jeno’s response was tattooed on his soul, “I, as a man, am only incapable of two things: one is stopping loving you, and the other is meeting the creator of the universe. These are the only impossibilities in my life. Someday, you might grow tired of me—or kimchi jiggae, but there will never come a day where I can meet the angel that brought you to me and thank them face to face. Even if somehow I ever do—dead or alive, I’ll just ask them to let me love you in every universe and call you my universe.”
To hear such Shakespearean words from a man who had always been all about action and was more comfortable showing his love and emotions through actions, Donghyuck knew each word he spoke came directly from his genuine heart and could see it in his sincere eyes, too. That was the first time Donghyuck had shed tears outside of bed, his heart aching with a love that was too profound to embrace without breaking open.
“I’m not planning on letting you go anytime soon, though. If you give me one flower every day, in only two years I won’t be able to step foot on an empty spot in my apartment!” Donghyuck had sobbed, making Jeno kiss his pouty lips before saying, “I’ll buy you a big house with a big garden, don’t worry.” Oh, how he wanted to yell at the world that this was his man. How he wanted to get up right then and marry Jeno on the spot. “But you’re gonna run out of different flowers eventually, there can’t possibly be a million types of flowers.”
“Then I’ll make you new flowers myself.” His crescent eyes were so dazzling at that moment that Donghyuck didn’t want to close his eyes or even blink when Jeno laid him on his back and gently climbed over him to kiss him lovingly, mindful not to press too much of his weight on him. “Since when do you talk so well?” Donghyuck had asked between the heated kiss, with his hands all over Jeno’s trusting shoulders and fluffy hair. “Since you stepped into my life. It’s just naturally slipping out now.” Jeno had breathed, gazing right into his eyes, stripped off all the layers he used before to conceal his feelings. Donghyuck vividly remembered the happy smiles and giggles Jeno had gifted him then, as he kept peppering kisses to every corner of his face and upper body. That night had proved Donghyuck that Jeno was undoubtedly a man of his words, looking at how his apartment was now decorated with 327 flowers and his kind eyes stared at him like the very first day—like Donghyuck was the prettiest flower he’d ever seen, like he was the only thing he wanted to land eyes on for an eternity.
Most of the flowers were dead by now, nothing unforeseen. Even with great care, they don’t last long. That’s their nature. It was sad for Donghyuck to see them slowly die, but Jeno somehow managed to turn even that into something happy. “Think of them as your memory keepers. Each flower holds memories of the day you received them. They can be a reminder of all the happy and not-so-happy moments we shared together; an exhibition of us growing older together day by day.” Jeno had whispered to his ears one night—the night of their 6 monthiversary—while thrusting into him as Donghyuck stared at the half dead half fresh little garden in the living room with blurry eyes. That moment, as Jeno made love to him on their blue lily and magnolia scented sofa, Donghyuck finally realized why Jeno was so committed to giving him flowers on a daily routine.
Jeno’s flowers were dead, but his love still touched him like a freshly bloomed cherry blossom on the first day of April. Flowers wilt, but Jeno’s love for him doesn’t. That’s its nature. Everything has a lifespan—everything but Jeno’s love, and that seemed to be the reason for everything. Jeno Lee, born in the month of blooming flowers and trees, had been telling him ‘I love you’s’ in his own way all along. He had been wordlessly promising him that while everything else fades away from life, his love won’t. It all comes to die one day, but Jeno won’t be vanished from Donghyuck’s mind even after walking on the devoid ground of fallen petals in the Underworld. Every bud, every stem, every thorn reminded him of Jeno.
He was still that Jeno—his very own Jeno. The reason his world still spun, the force that made every breath feel worth taking. He was his shield, his quiet gravity, pulling him back from the chaos like the moon calming a stormy tide. “I’ll never let your light die out, my sun,” Jeno would whisper against his ear, his lips trailing soft kisses down Donghyuck’s tired shoulders, sat in the bathtub easing the ache from another long day of pretending for fans who criticized every move, demanded the impossible, and returned only negativity in exchange for the energy he poured into being their ‘Fullsun.’
It was exhausting to radiate warmth for the world when the world felt so cold in return. But Jeno kept his smile alive. “In a way, you’re like a stage, you know? Always seen, always lit. Everyone watches, expects, and takes from you. It is draining. Even the brightest stages need a curtain to hide behind—to take some break, because even they crack without rest. Let me be that for you, Hyuck. Your cover, your silence, your shelter.” He had once told him, when the pressure of the wicked reality they had to live in had gotten too much to bear—too intense he couldn’t properly breathe.
Panic attacks weren’t a stranger to Donghyuck, and it was obvious what caused it. Before dating Jeno, it happened more often and he used to isolate himself from everyone after work, so dealing with it was harder. After dating Jeno and letting him be the only exception from the whole world, however, was more helpful than he thought it’d be. Not only did it stop happening frequently and only got him thrice till then, but he now had a reliable technique to help him. It was Jeno. Jeno had become his relief, his sensory grounding. He would hug him, guide him to focus on his voice, and Donghyuck would hear Jeno, feel Jeno, touch Jeno, smell Jeno, see Jeno. Only Jeno. The comfort Jeno’s presence and their physical and emotional connection provided him was way more expensive than any stress reducing medication he’d ever taken, and after he let Jeno in—no more barriers to keep up his ‘I’m perfectly fine, I can deal with it by myself’ facade, only vulnerability, life suddenly got so much easier and happier. As if Jeno had taken away his anxiety and replaced it with happiness.
“I’m here to hold you safe and hidden from the rest of the world whenever you want, I’m here to block out the noise for you and give you a piece of calm. You don’t have to pretend with me, Hyuck—I pray to god that you don’t. I won’t ask you to talk if you don’t want to, but I’m here. I’ll always be here and you can always lean on me.”
Donghyuck had believed him. He still did. Wrapped in Jeno’s arms, he felt like he had found his place in the world, a safe nest carved just for him. To Donghyuck, Jeno was safety. He wasn’t just the man who made his empty apartment bloom into a garden, he brought color to Donghyuck’s soul.
And nothing had changed, except for how tense Jeno had become in the mornings and that was bugging him because he wanted to be there for Jeno as well. He wanted to know if something was wrong and wanted to be Jeno’s safe place in return.
“And I adore you,” back to the present, Jeno warmly kissed the trace of his teardrop and flashed a mild smile, “Do you wanna talk?”
Donghyuck struggled to swallow his sobs. Of course Jeno’s response to his ‘I hate you’ was an indirect ‘I love you.’ Exhaling, he tried to utter with a trembling voice, “Is there something that’s bothering you?”
“Hm?” Jeno blinked and thought for a second, “No?”
The sulky boy took a deep breath and cleared his throat to steady his small voice, “Are you sure?”
“Yes,” Jeno nodded confusedly, brows drawn. “Is there something that’s bothering you?”
“Yes actually, I can’t take it anymore.” Donghyuck sat up straighter, his back still leaning on Jeno’s naked chest. “Why do you keep pushing me away in the mornings? Why are you so grumpy just then and perfectly normal the rest of the day? It’s so confusing and to be honest kind of annoying. You know I’ve always had a thing for your sensitivity in the mornings, I thought it was hot, but it’s not hot anymore when you keep refusing me, so what’s up with you? Do you hate me? Is that it? You wake up and realize how much you hate me so you throw me away like I’m trash but then later in the day you get hungry and suddenly I look like a tasty meal so you come eat me like I’m the best thing you ever had and then the next morning regret it because you once again remember that you actually hate me but repeat the same cycle ‘cause why not, let’s confuse this motherfucker! But I guess I could understand that. Yeah, I can accept it if you just give me one honest answer. So let me ask you again, do you hate me?” He blurted it out all at once, sounding as if he was angry-rapping, making Jeno’s brows twitch in amusement before he chuckled, showing off his annoyingly adorable eye smile.
“You know that’s not true,” he replied calmly.
Donghyuck’s frown deepened. “Then tell me why? What has gotten into you? What’s the problem? I’ve searched the entire internet for answers and nothing helped. I know you’re not a morning person, but that can’t be. Are you having nightmares or something? Is that it? You can’t sleep well? Are you having nightmares because you’re anxious about something? What is it? Is it because of how hectic our schedule has been lately? Do you need a break? We can ask Mark to help us reach out to the company and get you a hiatus, just say it and I’ll call him right n—”
Jeno muted his babbling with a sudden kiss, soft but insistent, pulling Donghyuck back into his lap, tightening his arms around the smaller boy’s waist and holding him even closer. Donghyuck’s breath hitched at the gesture, his hands clutching at Jeno’s arms instinctively, the warmth and strength of the embrace grounding him even as his mind reeled. Jeno’s lips moved with a tenderness that magically unraveled Donghyuck’s frustration, making him forget about whatever he was complaining about just a second before and dissolve in the quiet passion of the kiss.
‘Uh, I missed this,’ Donghyuck thought to himself, as if he hadn’t been kissed just like this one hour ago before Jeno went to shower after giving him his flower of the day.
There was something about the way Jeno kissed him that sent him into a headspace. It wasn’t rushed or reckless—it was lingering and earnest, like he knew he was made for exactly this, made for kissing and worshipping Donghyuck. He spoke louder than his voice could ever get through their linked mouths, as though writing poems using his own lips as the pen, and Donghyuck’s as the paper. With each languid nibble, Donghyuck only grew more confident that their lips were indeed made for each other. They were each other’s.
He melted against him, a soft sound escaping his throat as one hand slid up to cradle Jeno’s cheek, his slim fingers trembling as they brushed against his skin. Jeno leaned into the touch, lips moving in perfect sync with his lover’s. Donghyuck’s thumb traced a delicate line along Jeno’s cheekbone, his other hand still clutching at Jeno’s arm, desperate to stay connected. When they finally pulled apart, their foreheads rested against each other, breaths mingling, hearts racing in unison.
Thump, thump, thump. Donghyuck needed more and already ached to connect their lips again. He was pretty sure it was written all over his face and the loud thumping of his heart made it even more clear. He wanted to drown in Jeno’s safe embrace and kiss him until his final breath, now fully understanding what Jeno meant whenever he said “God, I need to die for you.” Never, in the deepest corners of his mind, had Donghyuck imagined there would come a day where a love so strong could leave him with the sheer need to die for a man. A man he once believed only existed in fantasy stories, but now existed in the very real moments of his everyday life. It was so intense that he didn’t know what to do with himself and just accepted he needed to die for love. Jeno was to blame for that.
Lee Jeno and his stupid, adorable, Jeno-ish manners that had Donghyuck writing love songs.
As they caught their breath and Jeno’s eyes fluttered open, Donghyuck felt like crying all over again upon seeing his love-filled gaze and that disastrous eye smile.
“You were rambling, my love,” Jeno’s lips ghosted over his, making him pout unintentionally as he cupped his head to hold him close.
“I miss you, Jen,” his voice was so thin and soft it stabbed Jeno’s heart. His lips slightly pouted in return and he pressed a deep, soundly peck to Donghyuck’s damp lips, holding him impossibly closer.
“I miss you more. More than I could ever express.” Jeno cradled Donghyuck. “I’m so sorry for worrying you. May I talk now if you don’t have anything else to say?” He gently asked before continuing and Donghyuck nodded instantly, anticipating the long awaited answer he’d been desperate for.
“Before anything, I apologize for upsetting you. I will make sure this was hopefully the last time I ever made you feel like this. I noticed something was bothering you but when I asked, you said it’s nothing so I took your word for it and assumed you were probably just tired. It was wrong of me. I should’ve pushed more, but I just didn’t want to pressure you into talking.” Jeno kept brushing Donghyuck’s knuckles with the pad of his thumb, their hands entwined as he spoke.
“If I understood correctly, you’re upset because I cut our morning cuddles short and don’t let you touch me as much anymore, right?” Donghyuck nodded rapidly, his frown growing.
“Well then I hope it doesn’t sound like an excuse, but I have my reasons and I thought you knew,” The older man cleared his throat, pulling back enough to have a face to face conversation. “I’ve been having bad… morning woods lately. Like, really… bad, and I know how exhausted your body is because of the tour, so I… didn’t want you to feel like you had to help me after seeing my condition, so…” he smiled sheepishly, “that’s why I’ve been trying not to get as touchy with you to avoid that possibility, but I didn’t realize I was hurting you…”
Donghyuck stared at him as if he’d grown a second head, (ridiculously distracted by the thought of having two pairs of Jeno lips to kiss for a moment) doubting if his ears had heard right.
For a considerable while, he just stared at him in awe, mouth slightly parted. “Are you… I mean… You— what?”
“I’m sorry. If I’m allowed to have an excuse, though, I gotta say it’s happening because you’ve been getting unbearably prettier lately. Really. Unbearably.” Jeno pursed his lips for a short moment. “My body is reacting to you stronger than ever but the timing isn’t righ—”
“I’m gonna kill you,” Donghyuck interrupted with a light punch thrown at Jeno’s muscular chest.
Jeno grinned and rubbed his nose against his. “Please do.”
Donghyuck turned around and pushed Jeno down to the mattress, straddling his thighs and comfortably settling on top of him with his hands resting on his chest. “I will actually kill you.” He said, but he couldn’t suppress the wide smile that formed on his mouth, displaying his pearly teeth that Jeno adored a lot.
Jeno slid one hand around Donghyuck’s waist, using the other to comb through his hair and tuck a lock behind his ear with a familiar affection in his gaze. “I’d like that.”
Donghyuck lowered his head until his face was a breath away from Jeno’s and he took that breath by connecting their lips, sighing when Jeno pulled him closer and kissed him back equally needy as Donghyuck.
Imagine being stranded in a desert with no water for days. The thirst that comes from it could be everlasting. The more water you drink, the thirstier you get. To Donghyuck, kissing Jeno felt like that eternal thirst. The more he kissed him, the more he needed to kiss him. It was quite an uncontainable addiction. One that he couldn’t live without. In his twenty four years of life, he had been addicted to many different things. Shinchan, video games, kimchi jiggae, and stuff like that. Shocking news to his old self from only a year ago, he could live without them. Going through half a day without kissing Jeno, though, as dramatic as it sounded, could cause a full blown systemic breakdown within him. It had gotten to a point where even the thought of touring with his other unit which meant being away from Jeno for months terrified him. Once again, Jeno was to blame. And Jeno, he would have to find a solution for that because Donghyuck’s brain was rewired by love-drugs. All the life-sustaining functions in it only responded to one stimulus: kissing. It solely operated for kissing, kissing, and kissing.
“I can’t believe all of this happened just because you didn’t want me to help you.” He muttered once he, by the stupid need of breathing, parted their lips.
“Not that I didn’t want you to help me,” Jeno replied, lazily stroking Donghyuck’s belly. “Like I said, I didn’t want you to feel forced to. You’re drained, I didn’t want to wear you out more.”
Donghyuck scoffed and gently smacked Jeno’s chest with the back of his hand. “You idiot, have you forgotten I have a high libido? You should’ve just told me, my goodness.”
“Even with a high libido your body is still fragile and needs rest.” Jeno said softly. A warm blush colored Donghyuck’s cheeks at the remark, and Jeno couldn’t resist. He leaned up and pressed a tender kiss to the flushed skin just below his cheekbone then added. “I did tell you, though. Don’t you remember? Last week when we were eating dinner at the restaurant after the concert, you asked if I was having some kind of problem in the mornings and I told you that—”
“‘Morning woods.’ Oh my god, you’re right.” Realization took over Donghyuck’s face, his eyes slightly widened in surprise as he recalled the night. “You did say you were having morning woods, but I didn’t take it seriously. I thought you were kidding!” He chuckled to himself, feeling ridiculous as it turned out he was the reason behind his own misery.
The sound of Jeno’s beautiful laugh harmonized with his like a melody of love, and Donghyuck fell in love with him all over again right then. “Am I forgiven yet?”
“As if I could actually be upset with you.” Donghyuck nuzzled their noses together, twisting in his lap to properly face him. “Yes, you are forgiven, but you’re gonna let me help you from now.”
Jeno pulled his body closer till Donghyuck’s legs wrapped around him. “But I told you I—”
Donghyuck put a finger on his lips, “shhh,” then fondled his cheeks affectionately, bringing their noses together again in a soft touch. “You’re my man, Jen. I want to help you. Besides…” he ran his hand along Jeno’s neck, their lips slightly brushing as he mumbled, “I really miss having you…”
“Yeah?” Jeno smirked teasingly, tugging his bottom lip with his teeth. Donghyuck gave Jeno’s upper lip a kittenish lick in response, threading his damp hair.
“Yeah… you’re also getting damn hotter everyday, love, you’re not the only one who’s been getting affected.”
🤍
“Jen?” Donghyuck woke up feeling something hard rock pressed against his butt, a sign that Jeno was still here, and unlike the last few days, hadn’t left their bed before he woke up. He sighed happily, his hold tightening around Jeno’s arms that were wrapped around his belly. “You’re here.”
“I’m here, my love.” Jeno’s soft voice directly touched his ear, making his heart purr in joy. “Good morning,” the latter said as he inhaled Donghyuck’s scent.
“Good morning, indeed.” Donghyuck yawned softly, his eyes still closed, but his smile wide. “Did you sleep well?”
Jeno’s usual deep voice sounded vastly hoarse in the mornings—another reason why Donghyuck found him extra hot during that time of the day. It tickled his insides as Jeno’s lips grazed his shoulder, peppering small kisses all the way up to his face until he kissed both of his eyes. “I did, best sleep I’ve had in a while. You?”
Donghyuck’s eyes slowly fluttered open, a delighted smile adorning his naturally pink lips. Letting out another dreamy sigh, he tilted his head a bit to see Jeno’s loving face. “I’m having the time of my life. You know how it can get better?”
Jeno could already tell what Donghyuck was thinking by seeing the expression on his face, but he still asked. “How?”
Donghyuck arched his hips to push himself back against Jeno’s erection, enjoying the way Jeno closed his eyes for a moment before he gripped his hips a bit too hard—Donghyuck enjoyed that too. “It’s simple.” He placed a hand on Jeno’s warm cheek, caressing it and leaning forward to feel their lips brush against one another as he spoke, “you just have to fuck me.”
Jeno pushed the grey blanket slightly down to pull Donghyuck’s body closer, his hands firmly holding his slim waist, cuddling him tighter. “Always so impatient.” He replied with a smile and gave his lips a brief peck.
“We haven’t fucked for two fucking years, you can’t blame me.” Donghyuck deadpanned, reaching downward to get a hold of Jeno’s member. His face brightened up when he felt him already leaking through his boxers—the only piece of clothing he had on.
Chuckling shortly, Jeno ran his hand down Donghyuck’s thigh, letting it wander up and down with no purpose—just a casual habit that had the potential of growing a purposeful warmth within both of them. “You mean two weeks.”
“Yeah. See how hard you are? It’s been a century for this poor guy.” Too eager to be careful with his hands, he stroked Jeno’s cockhead with a pressure that had him letting out a moan too loud for the silent air of their cozy morning.
An unspoken apology was exchanged by the younger’s bubbly eyes and his instant reflex of brushing the sensitive head with so much care and gentleness it felt like an attempt to soothe an injured, restless pet. It made Jeno draw him nearer to steal a kiss. A kiss that left zero space between them and felt like an opening gate to heaven. A promise of heated intimacy. A reward for the unconditional love they shared.
Unlike Jeno’s unhurried, eased nips, Donghyuck captured his lover’s lips with the same insatiable hunger he always had. Desperate, like it’d been actual centuries since he last tasted them. Rushed, like it was his last chance to feel them burning against his. He cupped Jeno’s face and tugged his bottom lip with the intention of making it swollen like he fancied. At the same while, he hooked his fingers to the waistband of Jeno’s boxers, struggling to get rid of it as Jeno’s blazing touches all over his skin drained him out of the littlest physical strength to pull a piece of fabric off.
He gave up. Or forgot about it in a second, more specifically. He was too distracted to get anything done. His needs were in control of his mind, and they decided his body needed more friction, more action, more constriction. His back was still glued to Jeno’s groin, giving him the perfect route for achieving more. He rocked back against his hardness, moaning between the kiss from the sensation. More. So good I need more.
Jeno grabbed his leg and hiked it over his own to make it easier for him. He rubbed himself on Donghyuck’s asscheek in a synced rhythm, his fingertips clutching the heating flush of his thigh as he sucked on the latter’s upper lip. “I’m the one with an aching wood here, and yet, you’re impatiently begging to be pleasured again.” He said while leaving sloppy and wet kisses on Donghyuck eagerly pouty lips.
“When… did I beg?” A breathless Donghyuck replied, not liking the increasing distance between their lips as Jeno broke the kiss. He lifted his head to pull him back in, but Jeno kissed his chin instead, trailing his lips down to his flushed throat. Ah, Jeno knew him too well. Well enough to know he had to lick his throat all the way to his neck quickly to shut down his complaints about the broken kiss before he could even process it and come up with any words to say. Donghyuck could only moan in bliss now, pushing back with intensified need to feel Jeno’s dick.
“Your body’s begging, my darling,” Jeno sucked the spot near his ear, triggering a sudden jolt in Donghyuck’s body, “it always does.” He then slipped a hand inside his boxers without a warning, smiling as he briefly touched his boner before moving his fingers to play with his perineum. Right on cue, as Donghyuck began to squirm, Jeno tightened his hold around his waist to keep him in place.
The way he was touching him was not enough and too much at the same time. It was as though he was standing in the middle of fire, but still felt cold. Surrounded by the heat, but not quite touched by it. He needed Jeno to touch those throbbing spots with a burning passion, but even this steady stroking was hard for him to take. He wasn’t sure what he wanted. Maybe he was too sex crazed, but he didn’t have to worry about it—not until Jeno was right there and knew what he wanted. Jeno knew Donghyuck better than himself. Jeno could decide for him. And his first choice, fiercely thrummed inside Donghyuck’s veins.
It was a simple move with an impressively effective outcome. All Jeno had to do was fondle his tit to make Donghyuck feel like crying. He had always been responsive—his little petite body over-sensitively reacting to every love brush from Jeno. He also had always been extra sensitive when it came to his chest. But this was a bit new, and Jeno loved experimenting with Donghyuck. He groped his tit ever so lightly, and earned a high pitched moan from him. Donghyuck grasped Jeno’s hand to keep it right there and practically begged him to continue by restlessly guiding his hand. Good thing Jeno had woken in a good mood and gave him what he wanted without overstimulating him to make him actually beg.
His other hand found Donghyuck’s entrance, teasing it with his fingertip. “Jen…” Donghyuck called, sounding out of breath—just like Jeno liked. “Hmm?” He murmured, circling the pulsating muscle with a maintained pressure to keep him on the edge, not pushing it in yet.
“Please, just… Fuck me.” Donghyuck managed to utter, his tone pleading. It boosted Jeno’s ego. He wasn’t even intending on getting him to plead, oppositely he’d decided to take his time with him and properly make love to him since it’d been so long. But Donghyuck was making it hard now. His hand reached back again, to pull off Jeno’s CK boxers and this time he succeeded with Jeno’s help. It slipped out of one leg, still loosely hooked around the other knee, but it did not matter. Donghyuck could now run his fingers along the precum slicked length and delightfully jab it on his thigh.
With the way he was acting after some brief touch, anyone else would’ve thought that he was severely touch-starved. Jeno, however, could tell that he was just dick-starved. And good for him; because Jeno had a huge one of that.
Slightly yanking down Donghyuck’s boxers only below his ass to get a sight, he adjusted their position to fully settle his larger frame behind the smaller man. Wrapping both arms around his torso, Jeno resumed pressing his hard-on against the soft flesh of Donghyuck’s ass. A rather loud sigh of satisfaction left their mouths at the contact. He began grinding against him in a slow, sensual pace, dancing with Donghyuck’s needy responses.
“Oh it feels good…” Donghyuck mumbled, matching Jeno’s movements and accepting his gentle thrusts. It felt beyond good to be so snugly nestled in Jeno’s embrace and bring a sense of relief to their fatigued shapes and souls. Jeno buried his face into Donghyuck’s neck, nuzzling and kissing every inch of it with a tenderness that stung his insides with what felt like poison. Every kiss was a toxin, every bite was a noxious injection into his soul. Deadly, but not fatal. Ruinous, but not costly. A kind of poison that was an antidote itself and had his blood tingling for more.
“Does it, darling? You like it?” Jeno whispered, spreading Donghyuck’s perfect globes apart to glide his cock directly on his tight hole. Donghyuck gasped, his fingers digging in Jeno’s thigh as the older man kept fueling his fever with his maddeningly leisure rub-downs.
He jerked backward and nodded continuously. “Yeah…” he breathed out with a small voice, desperately grinding back, “yeah I like it…” His hand moved on its own once again, mindlessly grabbing and nudging Jeno’s thick cock at his entrance. “Make it better…” Donghyuck demanded, tightly closing his eyes when the head almost entered him.
Jeno pulled back, hearing Donghyuck whimper in disapproval before he said, “I have to prep you first.”
“No, don’t need it…” Donghyuck softly answered, holding onto Jeno’s muscular arms. “You won’t hurt me anyway.”
“But you’re tighter than usual. It’s gonna hurt no matter what I do.”
“Then let it hurt, my love, I don’t care.” Donghyuck twisted his head to face Jeno and threaded his fingers through his lover’s velvety black hair. His gaze was confident and full of love as he continued, “I want you, and I can take it.”
Jeno reached over the nightstand, grabbing a bottle of lube and spreading it across himself and Donghyuck’s waiting hole. The last thing he saw before he felt it, was a smile. One that resembled a midnight-born stardust in the morning darkness of Donghyuck’s room—stealing the job of the sun that was hidden behind the curtains and the lights that yet had to be turned on. It was a simple smile, very Jeno, very effortlessly bright and heartwarming, but it did wonders to Donghyuck’s love-slaved being. Jeno entered him ever so gently, stilling right after only half of his length was inside. And Donghyuck felt no pain.
He should’ve yelled his lungs out, wailed so hard it’d make Jeno whisper endless sorry’s and invite him to an endless kiss in an attempt to ease the pain. It’d been about three weeks since they had a proper penetration—two weeks since they last had any kind of action. He was severely unstretched and tight, it was only natural to hurt. It didn’t.
With his neck craned, his eyes locked with Jeno’s, he let out a trembling breath. The heat of Jeno’s body was pressed all along his spine, he could feel every beat of Jeno’s heart against his back as Jeno kissed the back of his shoulder. He cradled Donghyuck’s hand, their fingers interlocked just above his head—tucked into the pillow. His other hand roamed under his shirt—a white Jordan gym tank top that once belonged to Jeno and was loose and big enough on Donghyuck to cover till his mid thighs. Rolling up the cotton fabric, as well as pulling down his boxers lower this time for easier access, letting it hang from one knee, he softly kneaded Donghyuck’s belly and pushed the rest of his shaft in.
Donghyuck squeezed Jeno’s interlaced hand, whining as it started to get real. With Jeno’s impressively large and thick size fully inside, the pain was now one step away from being welcomed into his walls. Jeno’s thumb found its way between Donghyuck’s parted lips, quieting the moan that nearly escaped him with the slight shift of Jeno’s hips. He sucked on it like second nature, simulating the way he usually worked his lips on Jeno’s dick. It urged Jeno to thrust into him a bit roughly, losing his self-restraint for a moment. Donghyuck bit his thumb from the ache, his whimper muffled. “Sorry,” Jeno murmured softly and drew it back, dragging it down his throat to his chest, stopping on his stiffened nipple. He rubbed it in a circular motion, tracing tender lines over it while gazing right into the younger’s fluttering eyes.
Donghyuck clenched around him and arched his hips, his chest erratically heaving up and down from the pleasure. “Move…” A breathless plea from a helpless man. “Move, Jen, please…” His voice was still sleep-worn but its honey flavor kept possession of Jeno’s existence.
Jeno, ever the possessed man, did as told, moved by command, chased by love.
He shifted slightly, lifting Donghyuck’s leg just enough to cradle it over his own, his palm sliding under to securely grasp his thigh. He snapped his hips forward again and again, he grazed his tits, kissed his neck, licked his ear again and again, and he loved, worshipped, and cherished Donghyuck again and again. Donghyuck lay curled in Jeno’s arms, his back pressed flush to the warmth of his admirer’s chest, like he was made to fit that exact space, and he took every pound of Jeno’s love. He rolled his hips back and moved together with Jeno between their shared hushes and ragged breaths, creating obscene sounds of their linked bodies. Their hands—two different shades of one palette—stayed locked on the pillow, unmoving. One was built to protect, wrapped around the slender grace of the other, and it was a perfect fit, visually pleasing like a yin and yang necklace. But far more importantly, it was emotionally comforting, devotionally reassuring, spiritually healing.
Jeno’s lips were everywhere, on his jaw, on his cheek, on his hair; everywhere but not the one place that needed his affection the most. It took one look at Donghyuck for him to get the message, and the next moment his lips were on Donghyuck’s thirsty, plump, heart-shaped lips. Jeno’s tongue slid out to taste him, and Donghyuck shivered in response, lips twitching into a half-smile as he tilted his chin a little higher. Jeno licked into the kiss, then lightly nipped at his bottom lip. His cock was still pounding into his walls with a slow rhythm, Donghyuck encouraged him to speed up by pulling his head closer and needily rocking back against him. As the kiss grew messier and warmer, Jeno’s thrusts got stronger and deeper. The louder Donghyuck’s noises became, the faster Jeno moved.
Donghyuck pulled away from the kiss to moan as Jeno deliberately hit his prostate, clutching on Jeno’s knuckles, “Did you grow an inch or something?” He panted, close to shed tears from the pressure.
Jeno smiled against his lips and chastely pecked them before re-aligning himself to purposely ram into his throbbing heat. “You’d like that, wouldn’t you?” His balls slapped against Donghyuck’s butt as he passionately thrusted into him, stretching his inner walls open. “Should I start using those penis enlargement creams that swear it can make your size twenty inches?”
Tears, at last, rolled down Donghyuck’s cheeks, but he giggled. “No, thanks,” he paused shortly to exhale, ending up moaning, feeling his prostate gland burst with Jeno’s assault, “I’m already dying taking your 8 inches.”
“I thought you didn’t care about the pain, where did that confidence go?” Jeno teased, vigorously rutting into that sensitive spot, his ears savoring every delicious sound Donghyuck made.
“Shoved it up your ass, my love,” Donghyuck sassed, with river-filled eyes, red as blood cheeks, and shaky, wet with precum thighs. Jeno chuckled and leaned in for another kiss, knowing the magical power it had on his sulky lover. First, he brushed his tongue against his, then he lowered his free hand to take his aching cock into his loose fist, and a moment later Donghyuck was bucking into his touch, his muffled moans growing louder. Not knowing what to do with the multiplied rush of sensation, he squirmed around, tangling his legs with Jeno’s and even entirely kicking off the blanket in the process. His muscles were tightening with every surge of glee, but Jeno’s grip kept him in place.
Jeno jerked his rigid erection, smearing his shaft with the gathered liquid around his tip with careful strokes. His thrusts became hastier and quicker. He pulled apart their lips, tending to trail it down more corners of Donghyuck’s body, but it didn’t take a second for Donghyuck to mourn the loss and tug at his nape to capture his lips again, sucking on them with hunger and insistence, silently crying harder with each rough nibble. “God, why is it so hard not to kiss you?” he keened, his hand still clasped with Jeno’s, tightened, the other roaming through his fluffy hair. “Why… why can’t I stop kissing you?”
“It’s called addiction, darling, and you’re not the only addict here.” Jeno answered as sweetly as ever, moving his lips to kiss away Donghyuck’s tears despite his immediate complaint that caused more tears to stream. “Shhh… take a breath with me… I’m here, I’ve got you.” He guided him lovingly, his nose nuzzling on Donghyuck’s temple, his breath warm and steady against his skin. Donghyuck nodded and took a deep breath, his heart fluttering when Jeno kissed his temple, praising him, “That’s it, beautiful, keep breathing like that and focus on my hand… let me drive you to relief.”
Focus, the Beautiful brown haired boy did. Fall in love, the poor boy also did. Jeno rubbed the foreskin of his length up and down, sweet-talking him into his orgasm just like he promised—following him shortly after, spilling the whole amount of his cum inside him, and Donghyuck, with a buzzing head, drowned in ecstasy, realized…
This was a turning point. A huge turning moment for him. And there was no going back from it.
Him being in love with Jeno was acknowledged by the two of them—had been since ten months ago. Him falling more and more for him every day, was although out of his hand, admitted. It wasn’t news. But Jeno brought their joined hands to his lips, pressing a slow kiss to his knuckles, and his other hand, the one that had painted his cock white moments before, rested over his heart, and Donghyuck’s notebook ran out of papers.
‘Jeno is… music.
His touches are notes, his kisses are lyrics, his laughs are melodies.
Music has been my entire life since I was a kid. Every time I tried to escape it, my desire to learn, create, and play something new doubled. It’s been the only permanent thing I’ve ever had before Jeno.
He learned me, created the best of me, and now he plays me. Permanently. I can’t escape him, and I don’t want to.’
Donghyuck mentally wrote to himself, his mind gushing out with endless words and inspirations. He could write a thousand pages about this moment and what he felt. For now, he turned his body around, fully facing Jeno, his head resting on his spread out arm. “Don’t ever let me go…” He said, watery eyes fixated on Jeno’s intense pair.
There was a short distance between them now, barely a breath away, but unbearably long for lovesick souls that had been attached like one skin for the past god knows how many minutes. Jeno swiftly pulled him back into his arms, this time resting Donghyuck’s head on his shoulder after kissing his forehead. “I won’t. I’ll hold you here forever. I won’t ever let you go.” He said, the words breathed into the crook of Donghyuck’s neck like a vow.
Jeno was a man of his words—Donghyuck knew that better than anyone. It was the beginning of day 327 of their relationship and 326 flowers sat across the room under his sight—a new one awaiting him right before midnight. If anyone could hold him forever, it was undoubtedly Jeno, and Donghyuck, at this point, wanted nothing more than to be forever holded by Jeno.
🤍
r/dating_advice
u/lceah423 • 14h
Why do I feel so in love with my boyfriend?
I (24M) started dating my boyfriend 477 days ago. Tomorrow is his birthday and for some reason, I am way more thrilled about it than I’ve ever been for my own birthdays. Unfortunately because of our jobs, there’s not much that I can do for him. Still, I feel so… happy in a giddy way thinking about the little moments we’re going to spend together tomorrow morning; which got me thinking. Why do I feel this way? Why thinking about celebrating his special day with him makes me this happy? Why thinking about his little smiles makes me feel like I’m high on cloud nine, and why do I just… love him so much?
I’ve dated and loved other people before him. So I thought I’ve experienced it all and there’s no way I’m going to ever fall in love again like how I was in love with my first love. Now, he’s making me doubt if everything I’ve felt before him were even true. I’m questioning whether my feelings for anyone before him were real or I was influenced to believe they were? I’m genuinely convinced this might really be the first time I’m actually feeling love and I don’t know how to feel about it.
I somehow feel scared, because I’ve never been loved like this either. He, in simple words, worships me. He does things for me that even fairytale men are incapable of. If I name some of them, you might think I’m lying, but to give you a vision, he’s been giving me a flower every day since our first day, so I currently have an ocean of 477 flowers in my apartment. That’s how devoted he is. And he makes me feel truly worthy of being loved like this. He made me believe I deserve to have him by my side, and that is what scares me.
I once used to think so low of myself, and because of the life I chose for myself, I had to accept that I could never have a forever with the one I love the most. But I don’t and can’t have any of those negative thoughts and worries about me and my future anymore, and it’s all because of him. I’m scared because I don’t have anything to be scared of—if that even makes sense. He left nothing but a mind full of peace, a heart filled with joy, and a life fully loaded with love for me.
I don’t know what to do. I don’t know why I even love him so much like he’s just a walking green flag of a man who goes out of his way to spend time with me, writes random little love notes for me (who even does that?!), takes me to the best dates even though we’re both PACKED with work and he’s a total homebody, always stares at me like he’s got nothing better to put his damn puppy eyes on no matter where we are, gives me space whenever I need it, pays so much attention to me that he knows what I need even before I do—whether it’s emotionally/physically or necessities related (he even gets me things that I mark as ‘might have to buy a new one’ he has no sense of saving money), helps me with house chores even though we don’t live together, always cuddles me to sleep even though we don’t… officially live together… 🙁, cooks for me even when he’s tired and even though it’s not really his thing to do, never lets me wash dishes because he doesn’t want my hands to get rough :( and yeah all that kind of stuff. Why is he even like this… like he once went out at 3 am just because I said the Korean version of my favorite snack Chocobi doesn’t hit the same as the original Japanese one… so he went and looked for the original in multiple shops and got back an hour later with a happy smile. I had to scold him because for god’s sake I didn’t even say that I wanted it and even if I did, it could wait! It’s not like I was pregnant and it was a craving emergency!!! But then he looked like a kicked puppy and made me feel guilty so I kissed him and stuff, but the point is, I don’t know why he does what he does and WHY do I enjoy whatever he does and feel so… safe and sated because of it?
Please help me figure out if this is normal and tell me what I should do with it, I need some advice.
Thanks for reading my rant!~ Had to get it off my chest.
⇧ 623 । ⇩ -34 [ 💬 127 ] ➦ 1.2k
─
charmingsel65 • 9h
Marry him. That’s what you should do. The man is head over heels for you, what’s stopping you?
⇧ 899
─
k6hx • 12h
I mean this in the most respectful way but this is such a non issue 😭😭😭 like damn you’ve scored a real man who truly loves you and you love him back HOW BAD IS THAT?
⇧ 386
─
sushidontlie • 6h
Is this rage bait cuz I’m bout to fume 😹🙏🏻🥀
⇧ 274
─
aurora_st145 • 10h
Oh to be loved like this 🥺✨ girl he’s a KEEPER!!! Get him!! Put a ring on him and marry him!! I’ve had a few lovers before and have experienced different types of love but never this. This is what everyone looks for and if I were you, I would’ve married him a long time ago! The reason why you no longer have fears and worries is because you know whatever happens, you have him by your side and you’ll deal with it together. You know he’s the one, you know you’re not losing him anytime soon, that’s why your heart is at ease, and that is so precious and beautiful 🥺 Clearly what you’re feeling for him promises an eternity, so I suggest you sit and think of your future with him. If the image you see is still fear-free and gives you the same joy and safety you currently feel, then you know what your answer is! I wish the best for you two! ❤️
⇧ 693
─
badluckcat • 11h
Men like that don’t exist lol he’s just very good at acting. You’re valid for being scared. Escape before it’s too late. He’ll ruin you.
⇩ -209
─
thatlilsapphire • 4h
Your story reminded me of my own love story. I dated a girl who I truly loved. Remembered her favorite flowers after hearing it only once, and never forgot it until months later I got them for her, held her hand everywhere, was never ashamed to be seen holding her hand or being with her, would kiss her any moment any chance I got even if we were in public, I would give her a quick kiss on the forehead or possibly the lips. (no snogging in public 😂) When she smiled, it lit up my world, shined like a diamond in a dark room. Hearing only her voice made me happy and calm. Being in her presence silenced the noises in my head, and I felt at home. When she was ill, I ensured she never missed a dose, and always made sure to remind her if she was at work. Once drove 600 miles (14 hrs) to be with her for 2 days then drove back again. Even though she never asked for gifts, whenever I could afford it I’d always buy her something, even something as simple as flowers for £13, and once bought her a real diamond bracelet because it reminded me of her.
Just like you, she told me that I took away all of her fears and that she felt beyond happy with me. But then after a while, she said there has to be a balance and that it’s not healthy to only feel happiness and good things. Might have been the traumatic things she’d been taught in her past relationships. Or maybe she just wasn’t ready for the next steps or didn’t quite love me as strongly as I loved her. Because we did have the balance she was talking about. We had our own demons to face but it didn’t feel as tough because we faced them together and it made it a whole lot easier to the point where she felt there were none.
I was unfortunate. We ended up breaking up after almost two years because according to her, “I was too good for her” and I haven’t been able to look at someone the same way since then. She also hasn’t moved on yet. I hope you don’t end up letting that small fear take the best of you and lead you to where it led us like she did.
Seeing a future with them and ensuring you’re working for that future and pushing yourself to make it work is a sign that you want them for life, for marriage. Not the short lived, meaningless, lust-based type of relationships most people nowadays are used to. If you have that sign, stop worrying. Ignore what everyone says and just trust him, it’s gonna work because it’s mutual. If you let it fail and lose him, you’re gonna lose yourself too and lock up both of you in hell. Just like she did. Best of luck.
⇧ 934
─
Donghyuck never thought his first reddit post would be about his silly little fear of love. It had never even crossed his mind that one day he’d use that app to hear people’s opinions and advice on certain topics. But ever since he researched on Jeno’s morning problem five months ago, he found himself interested in reading random internet discussions such as reddits, and global apps would be a safer option for him to use than Korean blogs; so he gave it a shot last night and told strangers about how intensely deep his love-life with Jeno was. He hadn’t expected to get so many engagements on it, but he received over hundred replies and most of them said the same.
‘Marry him,’ said the faceless people.
‘Sure, why not?’ Donghyuck thought.
Child Donghyuck had a lot of imaginations about marriage. He would marry a cute person who looked like that one guy from first grade and he would have beautiful kids with them that he would raise with so much love and kisses. Teen Donghyuck had bigger visions. He would marry a rich boy who could buy him anything in the world and would give all of his money to their children to ensure they had a bright future ahead of them and unlike him, wouldn’t have to live in poverty, struggling to fight for his dreams only to end up in a cruel industry where he had to survive by giving up his humanity and abusing his health.
Adult Donghyuck, however, didn’t want marriage at all. Not only he was fully adapted to the idol life, he simply didn’t find the concept of marriage suitable for himself. He was also convinced that he would never love someone enough to spend the rest of his life with, because that type of love seemed to be nonexistent—a fictional lie that the society had fed us with.
Or I shall say, adult Donghyuck from the past? Because right now, staring at Jeno’s glorious sleeping face and gently tracing his soft skin, Donghyuck wished to do this every day. Maybe marriage was overly exaggerated in terms of being complicated and hard. Maybe it was the total opposite of the big deal we’ve been picturing for ages. Maybe it was as easy as waking up next to your heartkeeper every day and admiring their existence like Donghyuck had been doing for more than a year. And maybe he was already married to Jeno and it didn’t sound as terrifying as it would’ve 478 days ago. Married or not, though, Jeno was his to hold and adore, and that was all he needed for now.
Like that one redditor whose reply stood out and helped him the most said, he had to stop worrying about nothing if he didn’t want to lose Jeno. He didn’t want to fail him because of one tiny complicated feeling about a four-letter word, and he wouldn’t.
It was currently 5:14 in the morning, the sun was just about to rise and Donghyuck had everything prepared. They had to head out to work in half an hour, and he had no choice but to cut off Jeno’s sleep.
He carefully leaned in, pressing a soft kiss on Jeno’s bare shoulder. In less than a heartbeat, he got distracted by the broadness of his shoulders and instead of focusing on his mission, he squeezed them and pursed his lips together. ‘Why does he keep getting more muscular?’
For a second, Donghyuck wanted to jump on top of him, forget about the world outside and screw whatever he had planned to play with Jeno’s muscles, maybe ride his dick to wake him up and be a brat to get him into the rough mood and have him towering over him with those lusciously attractive broad shoulders. Jeno’s slight stirring helped him lock back in and squeeze his own cheeks to ignore the growing inner warmth.
He kissed his nose, his eye mole, then throat. Bad idea. His lips took the path by themselves and moved from his throat to his collarbone and oh, what a delicious treat. His innocent kisses turned into intense, purposeful suckling. He sucked hard enough to leave red marks, until it wasn’t enough and his teeth found his shoulder, nibbling at first, then harshly biting to taste blood like he was some kind of a bloodthirsty creature like the vampires—but instead of aiming for the neck, he was obsessed with the shoulders.
Uh, there went his plan of waking Jeno up by soft, lovey dovey kisses to start a romantic morning. Jeno was wide awake now, caressing his hair with a fond smile. He probably had been awake for a while longer than he noticed, and he just let Donghyuck do whatever he wanted like always.
Donghyuck detached his teeth from Jeno’s skin and looked up to see his sleep-glazed eyes. His damp lips instinctively curved into a faint smile as he leaned over to whisper against his mouth. “Good morning, birthday boy.”
He then pulled back with burning cheeks to fix his posture, distractedly blinking as his hands searched for something. Once he found it, he held it up in front of Jeno and only then Jeno realized that Donghyuck was kneeling on the floor beside the bed, and in his hands, a vibrant, colorful bouquet that next to Donghyuck’s sparkling eyes looked extra ravishing.
“What are you doing?” Jeno’s husky voice was still drowsy as he rubbed his eyes and tried to sit up. It once again tickled Donghyuck’s insides.
Donghyuck’s love-struck gaze was fixated on Jeno’s awed face. He swallowed to ensure his voice was clearly heard and offered him his most sincere smile. “Starting the day on my knees for the man who hasn’t missed a single night to get on his for me.”
The emotion in Jeno’s face shifted into something similar to Donghyuck’s. Besotted. Defenseless. Wavering between touched and speechless. He immediately leaned forward and grabbed Donghyuck under his arms, effortlessly lifting and pulling him into his lap, the bouquet nestled between them. “You don’t have to do this,” he softly murmured, brushing his palms on Donghyuck’s knees.
“But I want to,” Donghyuck wrapped his arms loosely around his neck, fingers threading into the soft tufts of Jeno’s bedhead, stroking it as he leaned in for a kiss. The kind of deep, slow, and strongly tender kiss that had Jeno weak. “Happy birthday, my dearest man.” Donghyuck whispered against his lips, with a grin too breathtaking for Jeno’s weakened being.
Jeno impulsively tried to pull his lover closer for another kiss, forced to stop by the sound of crinkling paper. He glanced down at the cradled bouquet between their laps and held it up to his face, sniffing the sweet scent in and absorbing the details. He subtly tilted his head when he noticed tiny paper hearts on each flower with a familiar handwriting on them. “What’s this?”
“I broke our tradition for today to get you this.” Donghyuck replied as he gently grazed and kneaded Jeno’s shoulders.
“What are the hearts for? This one says ‘your scrumptious monstrous dick’?” Jeno blinked confusedly, “what does it mean?”
Donghyuck suppressed a grin, maintaining his soft tone. “You turned 25 today, so I picked 25 things that I love about you. I could write 25 thousand more, though.”
Jeno hummed and scanned the other notes with a thin smile. “So you only love 25 thousand things about me? That’s kind of upsetting.”
Donghyuck grabbed the bouquet and set it aside, freely straddling Jeno’s thighs and closing the distance between them. “Yeah, don’t get so full of yourself.” He said with playfully narrowed eyes and let their noses bump.
Jeno, entirely on instinct, cupped Donghyuck’s round ass and only then his brows lifted as he realized what his boyfriend was wearing.
He slightly pulled back to check him out and gawked at him without blinking. He had the kind of expression that easily exposed one’s mouth watering, and predictably so, his adam’s apple bobbed as he swallowed hard. “You’re finally wearing it.”
“Mhm.” Donghyuck twirled a lock of Jeno’s hair around his finger, trying to act unbothered but the deep crimson of his face and ears said otherwise. “You’re a pervert, I hope you know that.”
“I know,” Jeno murmured, eyes darkening just slightly as he looked Donghyuck up and down again, taking in the delicate lace mini dress and robe set he’d gifted him months ago. “But I also have a great vision.” He smoothly tugged off the loose robe, enjoying the display of the younger’s golden skin. “Look at you. I knew it’d suit you.”
It did in fact suit him more than he’d expected. A sheer see-through lingerie dress with floral patterns, extremely high side slits that completely revealed his legs and hips, and a tight-fitting bodice that showed off the swell of his pecs and natural curves of his waist. It was very enticing and very feminine, the reason why he hadn’t worn it until now. Lingerie pieces weren’t new to him. He didn’t have anything against them and even felt comfortable wearing them to sleep. But the off-shoulder neckline with a slight scalloped lace trim to flash his collarbone, fitted short sleeves that sat above his elbows, and most importantly the soft lavender color of the fabric, were entirely new to him and made it feel like he was wearing a real dress—one tailored with the sole purpose of getting fucked in it (which sounded about right)—instead of sleepwear.
Donghyuck’s face continued to grow more flushed as he struggled to ignore the dirty sounds in his mind that cheered him to get fucked in the dress like he was meant to. He wanted to, but not now. Not yet. “Everything looks good on me, but I honestly never thought this color would be this good on me, I’ll give you that.” It was true that a lavender colored cloth had never caught his eye and never made it into his closet. He believed that color or any other shade of purple wasn’t for him. How wrong he was.
Jeno slid his hand on Donghyuck’s thick, bare thigh and fondled it. His skin was the warmth he needed in the cold of the morning, his silken lips even warmer against Jeno’s dry ones. Donghyuck faintly tasted like the powdery Rouge Dior lip balm he always used, the sweet citrus and jasmine scent of his intimate moments’ signature perfume Coco Mademoiselle L’Eau Privée all over his dainty body that was pressed to Jeno’s as they kissed. He wriggled in Jeno’s lap, his cock brushing against the latter’s defined abdomen through the transparent fabric. His lips were slightly pulled back to air his needy moan—a waking alarm for every part of Jeno’s body.
Things got messy in a rush. Jeno ran his mouth to his collarbone and bit his bone, Donghyuck tugged at his hair and moaned louder right into his ear. Jeno targeted his chest next and took a bite of his covered-yet-exposed bud, Donghyuck kept his head in place by force and threw his own head back. Jeno yanked down the collar of his dress and sucked on his nipple, Donghyuck already felt on the verge of tears and scratched Jeno’s nape. It was a familiar path they’d taken a thousand times before, maybe even millions. A thrilling road trip to a place called desire.
Donghyuck and Jeno repeated the same routine every day. They were used to the same old work-eat-sleep cycle. One thing they never got used to was this uncontrollable frenzy that dashed inside them when they were near one another. It could come anytime in the form of a simple touch, or as a dizzying sense of lust. Like a volcano eruption. Sudden, unpredictable, intense, consuming. Once the explosion hit, there was no stopping. Just like now.
“You look exceptionally gorgeous in this dress, my love.” Jeno’s raspy voice and drunken eyes as he looked up at him while licking his nipple, stole Donghyuck’s breath away. He cupped his cheeks to find calm inside his eyes, for Jeno was his wound and cure. The morning light that shone on his pale, sculpted face and figure at that moment felt like a paid actor. Talking about exceptional beauty, in Donghyuck’s eyes, Jeno was beyond that.
“You can take it off of me tonight…” Donghyuck had that sultry face on that guaranteed his win in any situation and he was craving a good win. Grinding his ass against Jeno’s crotch, he traced his nails down the other’s burning cheeks and let his mankiller whisper be heard. “Or now… choose.”
“Oh we’re playing this game now?” Jeno grinned and with a firm grasp guided Donghyuck to continue rolling his hips. There was no ‘or’ and Jeno knew too well that this was Donghyuck’s way of saying he wanted him now. He also knew Donghyuck was proudly aware of the fact that he was irresistible to Jeno, and that he weaponized it for an effortless outcome. Using one hand to swiftly get rid of his boxers, he pressed the tip of his cock right against his lover’s entrance, his grin widening as he felt it gape around him. “I choose the night, then. Try not to sit on my dick.”
Well. Losing in general was bad enough for Donghyuck to be grumpy for a long while. Therefore, losing in his own game was just intolerable, and he wasn’t in the mood to lose on such a bright day. So he did what he had to. He pushed Jeno into the bed so his back was resting on the mattress and adjusted himself on top of him. “No, you can’t wait that long.” You in this context meant ‘I.’ He then did the divine move and sat on his hardening cock in one go.
Was he prepared? Not really. Was he forced? Not at all. But was he horny and crazy enough to take the whole eight inches to prove his point? Absolutely yes.
His mouth hung open in pain and bliss, nothing coming out of it but a quiet breath. He was either too shocked by his own action or too stubborn to produce any noise. On the other hand, Jeno shifted to find a comfortable angle, and saw it in Donghyuck’s face before he heard it. “This is all your fault.” Perfect. Just like he guessed.
Grabbing his small waist, Jeno pulled him down to feel his torso on his and shoved himself deeper in. “It is my fault that you’re being such a brat. Been too nice to you lately, wasn’t I, darling?” He thrusted into him as he spoke, and a whimper filled his ears.
Donghyuck squeezed his eyes shut as he felt another harsh thrust and gripped the sheets. “You can be nice for a little longer and give me time to adjust.”
“That’s not how things work, my beautiful doll.” Jeno, with the most sickening smile on his face, caressed his red cheek with the back of his fingers, and began pounding into him while doing so, “you chose for yourself and didn’t give me an option, you can’t ask for anything now.”
Donghyuck’s lungs were begging for air, but he couldn’t help them since the screams of his tight walls were louder. Jeno spread his plump asscheeks and slapped them, guiding him to rise and fall with each rough thrust. He gasped and helplessly grabbed Jeno’s wrist, watching his cruel, handsome face as he struggled to keep up with his pace. He had lost in his own game after all, but he still wanted to make a comeback. He could feel Jeno getting harder and bigger inside him, and he loved the pain, but he wanted to please Jeno first. He wanted a lot of things and there was a war between his head and hips. At the end, Jeno chose the winner by digging his fingers into his hips and probing his tender spot.
He moved Jeno’s hands to his butt and started bouncing on his cock eagerly, his silent cursing turning to loud, slutty moans as Jeno returned his grinds and slammed into him so fiercely it had his whole body shaking. Donghyuck had a plan. He wanted to give Jeno a blowjob on his knees after waking him up, then feed him the miyoek-gok soup he’d cooked for his birthday hours ago and prepare him for his day because unfortunately, they both had work today, too. So he was supposed to go on with his own schedule and wait until Jeno was free to go back home, then they could properly celebrate his day together. But now he was uncontainably riding Jeno like it was his lifelong plan—and he wasn’t going to stop until he got that birthday cream inside his cake. They were running late, the annoying ringing vibration of their phones was a reminder of that, but it didn’t matter.
Nothing but Jeno’s breathy grunts, Jeno’s knitted brows, Jeno’s sweaty forehead, Jeno’s veiny arms, Jeno’s swollen lips, Jeno’s bruised neck, Jeno’s blazing tongue all over his throat and shoulders, Jeno’s girthy cock deeply ramming and stretching him wide, Jeno’s sweet “god, you’re so perfect” praises, and Jeno, mattered. Jeno. It had always been Jeno.
And for Jeno, it had always been Donghyuck.
Later on the day, after a long, tiring routine of doing idol works on his birthday, when he was finally free to catch a break and leave the company, he received a text that was his turning point. A single audio file with no title, and a little note, “open it when you’re alone. happy birthday, my muse.”
He sat in an empty corner of the building with his earpods on and pressed play, expecting a normal voice message. It began with silence, a familiar shaky inhale, and he had to look around to make sure he was alone—thinking it was a dirty kind of audio. And just as he was about to turn down the volume, he heard Donghyuck’s melodic voice. He was… singing. There was only his raw, honeyed vocals, and he was singing a love song. One that he didn’t know. One that felt like a confession written for Jeno.
It was written for Jeno—he soon realized as the lyrics kept going and all he heard was memories, a replay of their nightly blooms and daily burns.
Donghyuck had written him a song to confess his love—not the kind of ‘I love you, let’s date’ confessions. No. This was him saying, ‘I breathe you, I sanctify you, I seek you, in every garden, every sky. My heart is in flames of a wine’s evermore boil, but I drink the blood of hidden toils in silence. To crave your lips, is a death wish that slays, yet I strive and give my soul to chase it. Come what may, my loveliest moon-face, I call to you in every shadow, and I long for you.’
Jeno got on his feet and searched for Donghyuck in places that were great memory-holders to them throughout years and just as expected, found him in the abandoned piano room of the secret building where the two of them once used to teach each other piano and guitar or simply sneak out of other lessons and hang out, but now used it to get physical and have some time alone—also to sneak out of dance practices and take a break.
There he was standing in the balcony with his favorite black leather jacket and blue skinny jeans, watching the moon that had just taken over the sun. He turned around with a smile as soon as he heard the old door creak open, and Jeno took his life’s fastest steps to reach him.
He kissed him like it was the breath he needed, the sanctuary his heart seeked, the wish his soul deemed, and Donghyuck kissed him back like it was the peace he chased, the glory he merited, the love he screamed.
A dawn-kissed touch has graced your face so rare,
Like dewdrops resting on a rose, I’m there.
My gaze, entranced by eyes that weep for me,
Your gaze, lost in a love that bends the knee.
Upon my lips, a song began to rise,
Like petals blooming by the ocean’s sighs.
Behold, though ill for that moon in the sky,
I’ve found my home in depths where your locks lie.
“I’m gonna marry you someday.” Jeno whispered against Donghyuck’s lips, leaned their foreheads together and ever so gently brought his small hands to his lips and kissed them. Lingering. Pouring pure emotions. “You can forget about it if you want, but I needed to say it.”
“I’m gonna say yes someday.” Donghyuck smiled, wrapped his arms around Jeno’s trusting shoulders, caressed his midnight hair and rubbed his nose against his. Promising. Flowing flowery confessions. “You can’t forget about it.”