Chapter Text
1
Tim was familiar with the name of his predecessor. He had idolized him for years, before the Wayne's even knew who he was. He cried when he died, and he mourns now. He was very familiar with his name, and he was familiar with the fact that Batman did not want him to be his robin. He knew Nightwing didn't want him to place himself in their delicate and exclusive club. But he couldn't let Batman continue with what he was doing, he was destroying himself and the trust of the people of Gotham. He couldn't let that happen. So he became Robin.
The first time he was called Jason was Months after he became Robin. He had just returned from patrol with Batman, Nightwing had returned to Bludhaven that morning so the cave seems more empty and colder than usual.
“Robin, you almost were compromised.” B scolded him. Tim just scoffed. He was nowhere close to being compromised. If anything Bruce was closer to endangering the mission then he was. They were scouting a warehouse where a weapons deal was happening. Tim had been in the rafters and Batman jumped down earlier than usual. Tim had been surprised and followed, but apparently that wasn't what Batman wasn't so now he was getting scolded for it.
“I was fine B. I wasn't going to do anything.” Tim rolled his eyes underneath his domino mask as he let the glue dissolver work. Bruce’s scowl just deepened.
“Robin, this isn't a joke. You could have gotten hurt.” Bruce had taken off his cowl and was looking over the files on the Batcomputer, not even looking at Tim as he scolded him. Tim finally got his mask off and began putting his gear away.
“I wasn't going to get hurt. I'm not weak.” Tim stuffed his suit away, turning to go back up the stairs and leave the cave when Bruce spoke.
“I wish you would be more careful Jason!” The words weren't yelled, but the silence it left after was enough to make Tim believe he did. Tim scowled, his back to Bruce so he didn't see. He wasn't Jason, Jason was perfect in every way. But he was dead and Tim wasn't. Tim rubbed his face, wiping off the single tear that was pooling in his eye.
“Goodnight Mr. Wayne.” He spoke coolly before walking out of the Cave. Bruce didn't even call after him or apologize. But Tim understood, Jason's death was still fresh on all of them. So Tim just grabbed his things and said goodbye to Alfred before heading over to his house. He knew this would probably be a normal occurrence, and he just needed to brace for the eventual slip ups his team would have over the years.
–
2
The next time it happened was just a few weeks later. Scarecrow had escaped so Nightwing had come from Bludhaven to help them out. It was towards the end of the fight when Dick got gassed, getting a face full of the gas.
The fight had been by the harbor so they had to make sure while they were fighting no one fell into the harbor. But multitasking during a fight like that wasn't exactly easy. When the fight was over Batman and him rushed Nightwing back to the cave. Nightwing had been muttering things the entire ride back and when they finally got back his eyes were glassed over.
“Nightwing report.” Bruce growled out, moving around the cave as he brought Dick to the med bay. He sat Nightwing down on a bed and shuffled through drawers to get the antidote as Tim walked closer to Dick. In a moment of clarity Nightwing looked up at him and paled.
“Jason.” He whispered out, his voice breaking as he looked at Tim. Tim just froze, looking at his teammate.
“Wha- I'm not Jason.” Tim muttered out, too quiet for the other two to hear. Nightwing lunged forwards, grabbing Tim and pulling him into a bone crushing hug as tears went down his face.
“I'm sorry, I thought you died. I'm sorry I wasn't here.” He mumbled out, rocking Tim back and forth. Tim just looked forwards, not looking at Nightwing as he broke.
He continued to mutter more words, calling him Jason and apologizing. But Tim just blocked it out, letting it happen. Nightwing was under Scarecrow toxin, it was natural that he was seeing things that weren't there. So after Batman gave him the antidote and Nightwing passed out, Tim didn't hold it against him, just like he didn't hold it against Bruce when he told him to leave, calling him Jason once again. He knew it was inevitable, they were still grieving and he was an intruder in their family.
Tim left, making his way back to his house, mumbling a quick goodbye and goodnight to Alfred. When he got back he curled up in his bed, tears coming down his face, he knew why. He crawled out of bed and grabbed the crate in the closet, taking out a vile with what he needed. An antidote to Scarecrow venom. He didn't get a big dose, just enough that he was seeing flashes of memories he would rather keep buried. The haunting laugh of the Joker echoing around his room.
He couldn't be weak, so once he gave himself the antidote he crawled back into bed, stifling the giggles that bubbled up from his throat and he stared blankly at the opposite wall. He stayed like that until he fell asleep, his nightmares a welcomed change compared to the nightmare shit show that had happened that day.
Dick didn't talk to him for a week after that incident, Tim understood why. He didn't hold it against him.
–
3
By the third time Tim was used to it. He expected it at this point. He was hanging out with Dick in the Manor, playing a simple game in the living room when he slipped up.
“Jason, that's not fair! That's cheating!” Tim froze, but Dick continued laughing. He didn't notice, just continuing to act like nothing happened. So Tim did the same. Pushing down the pang of betrayal at his words. It wasn't his fault, he was grieving and Tim shouldn't hold it against him, so he didn't.
It happened more after that. More often, for longer periods of time. A whole conversation could go where they would call him Jason, not realizing who they were actually talking to. Maybe at this point they had just forgotten his name and believed his name to be Jason. He didn't hold it against them.
Whenever they called him Jason, Tim would just smile and nod. If they needed him to be Jason, he could pretend. He hated it, he wasn't Jason, and he had too many flaws to his predecessor. But if that's what his team needed it would be fine. He would be fine It was not fine, he was not fine
–
4
The fourth time, Tim isn't even sure they were calling him Jason. He was too out of it to know. He had been benched because the Joker had gotten out. He wasn't complaining though, the less he saw of that screwed of Clown fucker the better, and He had said as much. Dick had laughed, ruffling his hair as he suited up.
When they got back, they both looked exhausted. Tim was also tired, but he stayed up to make sure they were safe. When they got out of the Batmobile and Dick B-lined towards him, Tim knew what was coming.
“Jason! We did it. Joker's back in Arkham! You're safe!” Dick mumbled into his hair as he hugged him. Tim just nodded, biting the inside of his cheek to fight the tears. It's been two years now, he should be used to this, but it still hurts.
When he got back to his empty home, he punched a wall and cried. He fell asleep mumbling his own name to himself, as if no one called him by it, he would forget his own name.
–
5
The fifth time, Tim knew it was deliberate. He had been captured by Joker. The haunting laughs echoing around the warehouse, the familiar sound having haunted his nightmares.
“Look at the little birdy! Trembling in fear!” Joker laughed, patting his cheek as he looked down at him.
“Little Jay bird! How does it feel to be Jason !” He crooned out, laughing as Tim snarled at him. How dare he say that name, utter that word.
“Now now Jason, you need to play your role. You played the part of Junior so well, so why not Jason?” He teased, laughing at Tim's flinch.
“Nothing a little shock cant fix!” Joker laughed and Tim shied away from the escrima stick the Joker had gotten his hand on. Tim doesn't remember the rest of the night, just remembering getting rescued by Nightwing and Batman, Dick apologizing to him. Calling him Jason once again. Tim's cried, Dick thinking the tears were caused by the Joker, not him. Tim didn't talk to them for a week after that. He shouldn’t blame them, but it was getting harder and harder to make excuses.
–
+1
Tim was in the Titans Tower, going through case files on his computer when the tower went dark, the electricity going out. Tim just groaned. He needed the internet to work on his case, and the tower going out only succeeded in delaying his work.
“God damnit!” He cursed, closing his computer and putting his head into his hands. As he sat there, wallowing in his own self pity he heard the sound of boots walking towards him. Turning around he saw a figure looming from the shadows. Tim squinted his eyes and tried to focus his tired eyes on the figure.
“Who are you?” He muttered out. Frowning at the figure.
“Wouldn't you like to know Replacement.” At the modulated words, the person stepped forwards. Tim's frown deepened, Red Hood stepping out in front of him.
“Red Hood? Watcha doing here? Aren't you running a drug empire? I thought you would be too busy beheading rich bigoted assholes to come all the way down here.” Tim asked, looking the crime lord up and down, assessing all his weapons.
“Normally I would be, but- wait. I'm not a drug lord! I'm a crime lord! There is a difference!” Hood huffed out before continuing. “Anyways, as I was saying. I normally would be busy, but I remembered that I needed to clip the wings of a new bird in Gotham.” He mused, Tim looking at him impassively.
“Ok?” He replied, standing up.
“Ok? You're just going to reply with Ok!? What the hell is wrong with you Timbo!?” Hood asked, the scowl behind his mask obvious from his tone of voice. Tim froze, his eyes widening.
“What did you call me?” He asked, his voice sounding distant. Hood chuckled.
“I called you Timbo. Don't go blowing a fuse Tim. I know who you are. Are you going to go running back to Big Bat crying about how I know your identity? Tim Drake, heir to Drake enterprise.” Red Hood mused. Tim just stared at him in awe.
“Say it again.” Tim asked, stepping forwards. Apparently the desperation in his voice was obvious as Hood faltered, his confidence waning.
“What?” Hood asked.
“Say my name again. You know my name, my name. say it again.” Tim was now standing in front of the crime lord, his smile stretching across his face. Hood just faltered. Tim needed to hear it, hear that someone knew his name. The other Titans didn't know his civilian name, and Dick and Bruce had given up on calling him Tim at this point by the amount of times they had called him Jason. When they didn't call him Jason, they would just call him Robin. Dick would usually call him Baby Bird. He had almost forgotten what his name sounded when someone else said it.
“The fuck are you on Replacement.” Hood asked, Tim just flinched back at being called Replacement. He didn't need a reminder for what he was, that he was a replacement. Hood just seemed contemplative.
“Replacement?” Tim flinched again. “...Tim?” This time Tim looked up hopefully. Hood just groaned. With a click and a hiss, Red Hood was taking off his helmet. As he set it down on the counter he heard a strangled gasp from behind him. Looking behind he saw Tim looking at him. Tim couldn't believe what he was seeing. It looked like an older version of his predecessor, but his predecessor non the less.
“Jason?” He asked, his voice sounding quiet. Jason just looked at him before sighing and nodding. Tim smiled.
“Holy shit. You're alive.” His voice sounded breathless as he spoke. “And you know my name!” Tim rushed forwards. Jason tensed, evidently expecting him to attack. But instead Tim just rushed him, tackling him in a hug on par with Dicks octopus hugs.
“What the hell is wrong with you Tim?” Jason finally asked. Tim just gave a wet chuckle, tears coming down from his eyes.
“Do you want a list? I can definitely make a list if you want.” Tim mumbled into Jason's chest. Jason just looked down at the kid hugging him. Because that's what he was, a kid. Jason just groaned, cursing before pulling Tim off of him. Tim just whined in complaint.
“Look Tim. I'm not a good guy. I was going to hurt you. You need to stay away from me if you see me again in Gotham. Got it?” Jason asked, looking down at his replacement (brother). Tim just looked at him thoughtfully.
“Fine, but say my name again.” He asked, finally agreeing after a moment.
“Thank you Tim.” Tim smiled, preening at his words. “Now I'm going to go, don't tell B or Dickwing I was here.” Jason ordered. Tim just nodded.
“Wouldn't plan on it. It would only shatter their illusion long enough for them to call me insane.” Tim mumbled quietly. Jason barely caught it, just barely hearing it as he walked away. Now if that wasn't its own can of worms that Jason didn't want to open he didn't know what was.