Chapter Text
Severus felt his head begin to buzz from the rage he was feeling. It took a moment before he woke up from his trance and looked at Sirius Black—that damned mongrel standing before him—he growled, “Malfoy is my brother, not a lover, you idiot! And even if it were otherwise, you would be the last person who would have the right to make comments on the subject, Black! Who I sleep with or who I don’t sleep with is my business alone!” When he saw the Gryffindor’s look, full of surprise and shock, it dawned on him what he had said. A blush immediately spread not only on his cheeks but also on his neck.
He packed all his things and before anyone could react, before Narcissa Black could react, he ran out of the library. He headed towards one of the abandoned classrooms in the dungeons. It was the only place he could hide effectively, even from the four Gryffindors who called themselves the Marauders—they found him in other corners of the castle with terrifying frequency, as if he had a tracking charm on him.
Once he was there, he closed the door behind him and slid down to the floor. Why had he said it out loud? It wasn’t his secret. It was his mother’s secret! He didn’t even know if Eileen Prince had ever told Abraxas Malfoy about her pregnancy. He himself had only found out after his mother died—not using magic for too long had been fatal to her—when he had found her diary, and in it, the description of her relationship, or rather, romance, with the young, charming Malfoy. Considering how much of a resemblance there was between Lucius and his—their—father, Severus wasn’t surprised she had given in.
His breathing began to quicken, as did his heartbeat. He was nervous and couldn’t stop the tears from welling up in his eyes. His time at Hogwarts had been tough. Now it could—and probably would—only get worse.
Those morons—Potter, Black, Lupin, and Pettigrew—would probably target not only him but also his loved ones. Severus had already lost Lily, and he didn’t want to lose Narcissa and Lucius either.
xxx
While Severus Snape was going through the aftermath of his turmoil, Narcissa Black was struggling with her emotions. On the one hand, she wanted to run after her friend—Lucius, her fiancé, already treated the younger snake like his brother, which was more than amusing in the current situation—and on the other, she wanted to revel in the sight of terror in her cousin’s eyes. This time, Sirius decided to face Severus on his own. It was quite surprising, because from the information she had, it had never happened before—she could be wrong, though, Sev wasn’t telling them everything.
“Sirius...” she sighed, slowly getting up from her seat. Suddenly, she realised something else. She should inform Lucius about everything before news from another, less trustworthy and factual, source reaches him. “It would be better for you if Severus was mistaken about his kinship with my fiancé...” she placed her hand on his chest for a second as she passed him. “I’m convinced that both Lucius and his father will not miss the opportunity to punish you for what happened between you, your friends and Severus over the past years. They have tried to intervene before, but now they will have a rather effective tool in their hands.” When she was already a bookshelf away, Narcissa heard a fist hitting the table behind her. She laughed. She took strange pleasure in what she had just realised. “Cousin, cousin...” she whispered under her breath when she remembered how jealous Sirius had been when he attacked her friend. He was jealous enough that he saw only the wizard he was trying to interrogate. So jealous that he didn’t notice her, even though she was sitting right next to Sev. “When did this start?”
xxx
Snape? Severus Snape is Lucius Malfoy’s brother? Godric, that shouldn’t be possible. Sirius walked nervously to his dormitory, completely forgetting that he was already quite late for Quidditch practice. He departed from the path first, because he saw Snape entering a library. He had to know why this idiot was saying goodbye to Lucius Malfoy with such tenderness, with such a smile (he didn’t even smile like that for Lily). To fucking Lucius Malfoy!
Sirus rushed into the room, slammed the door behind him, and threw himself on his bed. He was so absorbed in his emotions that he didn’t notice either the crack of wood or the spark of pain that ran down his spine. He would find out about both later.
“You’re an idiot, Padfoot!” he growled at himself while rubbing his face with his hands. After a moment, he closed his eyes, only to see, just like he had been doing for the past few months, every reason why he shouldn’t even dream of Severus Snape as someone who could be his someday. Every word, mockery, touch, or joke... And to think that it came to this because he didn’t understand why that snake’s eyes had haunted him since the day he first saw them. “Your mother is right. You really are not good at anything... You will never be enough for anyone and certainly not for him...”
He felt like once again, because of his stupidity and impulsiveness, he had lost another part of himself. As if he was losing hope once again that something would change between him and Severus. As if what had happened last year wasn’t enough of a reason for him to kill all his dreams.
Blinded by jealousy of his best friend, jealousy that Snape was asking about Remus and not him, he forgot about the consequences of what he was going to do and took Severus to Moony. During the full moon. After everything, instead of confessing the truth, he told the rest of the Marauders that it had all been a prank from the beginning.
Damn jealousy. Sirius was jealous, so fucking jealous, and he was starting to lose control of it.
He was jealous of Rosier, Avery, and Mulciber, who Regulus believed were Snape’s roommates. He was jealous that the three idiots got to see Lily’s former friend in situations he himself would never see him in. Falling asleep late at night—perhaps with a book in his hand—and then waking up in the morning. Sirius had once got to see Snape after waking up—the snake had fallen asleep during Binns’ class—and that day he couldn’t think of anything but how indecently adorable Snape looked.
He was jealous of his own brother, who seemed to appear next to Snape whenever he took his eyes off Snape. Ever since Severus Snape had stopped talking to Lily Evans, there had been a whole new set of faces around him. Notable among them were Lucius Malfoy with Narcissa and his own brother. The more time passed, the more he suspected how similar his tastes were to his brother.
He was jealous, too—or maybe even more so—of the relationship Snape had with Malfoy. There was something unnatural about it. How the hell was he supposed to know that Snape craved Lucius’s presence, not because he lusted after him, but because they were brothers? How was he supposed to know?
He was afraid of what might happen after today’s argument in the library. His cousin was right. If it was confirmed that Severus Snape was Lucius Malfoy’s brother, then he himself could prepare for one thing. Death in a duel with Lucius. The Malfoy heir, despite his young age, was one of the best duellists in modern Britain. And from what Sirius knew about Malfoy, it was easy to deduce that if he hid himself, this lunatic would drag him even out of Hades.
Sirius Black didn’t even notice when he fell asleep, exhausted by thoughts, emotions, helplessness, and his own stupidity. When he fell asleep, his brain once again replayed the moment when he first met Severus Snape. The moment when this barely eleven-year-old boy looked at him for the first and only time, smiling.
If someone asked him about this dream, Padfoot wouldn’t know what to answer. He didn’t know whether he could still call the dream that was tormenting him a dream, or if he should start calling it a nightmare.
xxx
Lucius Malfoy wasn’t expecting a letter from his fiancée. If he were to be precise, he would say that he wasn’t expecting a letter from Narcissa for one simple reason. He had only seen her an hour ago. The fact that she had written to him could only mean one thing. Something had happened, and it was something serious enough that she decided to inform him immediately.
He thought it was a good thing his father wasn’t home—Abraxas Malfoy, after passing on the title on him, decided to take a little well-deserved rest without the responsibility hanging over his head—because he would have tried to intervene. He was quite incapacitating in his presence.
Lucius looked at the little owl, who was sometimes more stubborn than its owner—his fiancée—and picked up the letter brought to him. He broke the seal, pulled the parchment out of the envelope, and ran his eyes over the words written by Cissa. He did it once, twice, again... He did it so many times that he finally lost count of how many times he read that letter. Because of the emotions that suddenly shook him, he felt hot, really hot, and a moment later he ran out of breath.
“Severus is my brother?” he said loudly, but still uncertain. He sounded as if he was afraid to jinx it. “Is that possible?”
He had long known that his father had had an affair at the beginning of his marriage—a marriage that was merely a contract to shore up the Malfoys’ finances. The witch his father had chosen on his own wasn’t enough, because her father had not agreed to transfer their fortune to his daughter’s future husband. She was to manage independently what was hers.
It was this attitude of Lucius’ grandparents that had caused Abraxas to make provisions that went against the tradition and code of their family. Provisions that would allow future generations of their family to choose their own partners. In the new provisions, there was even a paragraph that the future Lady Malfoy might have been a Muggleborn.
“I need
to talk to him.” Lucius stated with complete determination. “I need to make sure.” He had time to talk to his father. First, he had to find out from Severus why he thought they had one common parent. He had to know why this boy had hidden something so important from him. Why had he hidden this information if he wasn’t afraid to tell him about his doubts about Tom Riddle and his views on wizards with a touch of Muggle blood?
Against his will, a thought entered his head. If all this turned out to be true—and he wanted it to be so—then he might have a better chance of protecting Severus from the Gryffindor morons.
This prospect made a wicked smile appear on Lucius’ lips.
xxx
When Severus finally calmed down, he noticed with embarrassment that a meal in the Great Hall already have ended. He will have to wait until morning to eat anything. He was sure Cissa had informed Lucius of what he had learned. It wasn’t hard to imagine Malfoy being upset that he had once again slipped away from him. Sometimes those two wizards acted not like his friends, but as if they were his parents. Which was nice in its own way in his current situation.
He stood up slowly and unsteadily. He felt his stiff limbs stretching. “Why did I react so strongly? This wasn’t the first or last argument with Black that I’d endured.” He couldn’t remember the last time he’d cried like that. But at least he was finally crying. When Severus realised that he hadn’t been able to mourn the death of the man who had been the only father he’d ever known, he began to think that there was something wrong with him.
Once he was standing, he used his wand to get a steady source of light and to improve his appearance. Snape did it methodically. He started with his clothes—trousers, sweater, outer robes—then moved on to his hair. He wanted to look more or less presentable in the eyes of his friends. Sometimes, especially in moments like these, he reminded himself that for the Marauders, for Sirius Black, he would never look normal enough.
He was too small for a guy. His nose was too big. His hair was too greasy. According to them, there was nothing in his appearance that was ‘enough’ and not too abnormal.
“You are a fool, Severus,” he said to himself before he left the outraged hall and went into the corridor. His treacherous heart sometimes returned to that small crush that had appeared when he had seen the adorable boy in the compartment of the Hogwarts Express when he had first ridden to school with Lily.
Black might be indecently handsome now, but what had happened between them since their first year had completely dispelled Severus of any illusions. More than once, the Gryffindor had shown him to be a total bastard. Fortunately, he had only tried to kill him once. Severus wouldn’t survive more. Neither physically nor mentally.
xxx
James Potter stormed furiously into the dormitory with Remus and Peter. Both boys showed up for training, even though neither of them was on the team. They were all there, well, almost all of them, because they were missing one person. Their chaser. Padfoot had once again failed to show up for training, even though he had promised them that this time he wouldn’t let them down.
At first they thought he was snogging some witch in one of the many corners of Hogwarts. They started to worry when it turned out that Sirius hadn’t shown up, not only for training but also for dinner.
That’s when they thought that maybe their friend had hidden away in the dormitory.
“It would be better for Sirius if he had an explanation, because if not...” he fell silent when he saw Wormtail and Moony’s unease. “What’s the matter?” he asked. Remus pointed to Padfoot’s bed. James, seeing how red and sweaty their friend was, closed the distance between them and used the spell his mother had taught him. “He’s got a fever.” Suddenly, something struck him. “Didn’t you say he was following right behind you?”
“That’s right.” Peter mumbled. “He detoured to the library for a moment to get a potions book. He’s been in such a mood lately that we didn’t want to question it.”
James fell silent for a moment. If Sirius wasn’t feeling well, why didn’t he go straight to the Hospital Wing? The library was definitely closer to the Hospital Wing than their dormitory. Madam Pomfrey wouldn’t have let him out of her care in this condition. He rubbed his hand nervously over his face before saying, “We need to transport him to the Hospital Wing. Peter, you’re the best of us at levitation spells. Can you do it? It’s quite a distance.”
“I can do it.” Pettigrew smiled. Prongs knew Peter was proud of his proficiency in spells. He wasn’t a genius, but he absorbed the material they learned in Flitwick’s classes quite quickly.”
What happened to make Sirius so ill? James thought as they walked out towards the hospital wing. He was worried—Padfoot was the brother his parents couldn’t give him. He himself was the result of his mother’s sixth pregnancy. Each previous one ended in a miscarriage. His parents didn’t try again after that. Not only because of their increasingly advanced age but also because hi mother almost didn’t survive labour.
Looking at how Padfoot’s hand hung limply, Prongs could only think of one thing. Hopefully, it wasn’t anything serious.
xxx
“Where in Salazar’s name were you?” that’s what Severus heard right after entering the Slytherin Common Room. He didn’t have to look around for the person who said it. He knew immediately who it was. Lucius had too distinctive a voice to be confused with anything. “Could you answer my question, or at least tell me how long I’ll have to wait for that answer?”
He felt his body stiffen. Just like it always did when he prepared to defend and attack at the same time. Straight back, tension in the muscles, and even fingers tightening around the hilt of the wand in his pocket. He knew that the latter was unnecessary, but after five years of fending off the Marauders’ attacks, he had developed a habit that probably wouldn’t go away anytime soon. “I had to calm down, and I didn’t need any witnesses or company for that.” He grumbled. “I had a few things to think about.”
Lucius stood up abruptly, but didn’t move from his spot to approach him. There was a hesitation and uncertainty in him that Severus wasn’t used to. His friend, his brother, didn’t lose his confidence enough to not ask without embarrassment in the almost filled Slytherin common room. “Why didn’t you tell me that there are strong indications that we’re related? Why didn’t you tell me that we might be siblings, and were you even planning on telling me that?”
Feeling the eyes of the snakes on him, Severus approached Malfoy, grabbed his hand and before he could react to what was happening, dragged him to his dormitory. Am I surrounded by idiots? He thought bitterly, throwing his friend onto the bed and closing the door behind him. He had barely done that when he heard a knock. Guessing who it could be, he looked out the hallway and invited Narcissa in.
When Severus was sure that he could speak, he asked, “What are you doing? My outburst of frustration is one thing, but what got into your head to announce our kinship to everyone?” he was starting to run out of breath again. “We look so different from each other that no one would believe the rumours that I’m sure Black will spread. The other students don’t even believe in our friendship...” he recalled with distaste Black’s insinuations, what did Black care who he slept with? “They wouldn’t believe that we could be a family, either.”
After a long moment of silence filled with tension and glances between Lucius and Narcissa, Severus realised that his friends were surprised by his outburst. He forgot that they weren’t used to one of his outbursts being directed at them.
Suddenly Malfoy started to speak, “You couldn’t have assumed that if I found out everything I would keep quiet about it.” he added after a moment, looking as if he read something from Severus’ face. “You didn’t think so, did you?” There was something like desperation in his voice. However, ‘desperation’ itself was too strong a statement.
“Why wouldn’t I think so?” Severus asked without a shadow of a doubt. “Put yourself in my place for a moment. I found out about everything after my mother died!” he growled furiously. He felt as if emotions that had been suppressed for too long were leaving his body. For the second time that day. “How was I supposed to know if the former Lord Malfoy knew about my existence? How was I supposed to know if he cared about the child he fathered with his lover?” He almost hissed through his teeth. He paced around the room, not really knowing what to do with himself or where to look. “I didn’t know where I stood. But I was sure I wanted to meet you. That’s why I cared about your friendship when I came to Hogwarts.” He felt tears gathering in his eyes. “Everything was okay, but that fucking Black had to suggest... He said something so obscene... I couldn’t hold it in and said that a romance between us wouldn’t be possible because you’re my brother!”
Severus didn’t dare to look at Lucius. He didn’t dare to do it, not when he finished speaking and silence fell between them, nor when said silence was cut by the sound of footsteps that he knew almost as well as his own. It wasn’t long before Malfoy placed his hands on his forearms and turned him so that he would look into his eyes. At first he tried to resist by closing his eyelids, but he finally gave in and locked gaze with Lucius’s angry silver eyes.
“How long have you known about this, Severus?” There was a dangerous note in Malfoy’s voice. The same note that always made other wizards want to get out of his way. “Did I understand correctly that when you first entered Hogwarts, you already knew that we could be related to each other?”
Severus cleared his throat before speaking,
completely forgetting that they weren’t alone in the dormitory. “Mum died when I was eight. I met Lily Evans soon after. I think I was compensating for the loss of my mum with her presence and that’s why I got so unhealthily attached to her,” he said too much.
“Evans... You gave the place that should have belonged to me to this... witch.” The dangerous note that Severus had heard earlier turned into anger. Lucius didn’t take well to sharing what he cared about with someone else. Regardless of whether it was a person, a thing, or a memory. “Why?” his jaw trembled.
Sev glanced at Narcissa, who he suddenly remembered. He needed her help, but it was clear that she didn’t know what to do now, either. “As I said, I didn’t know what the situation was. I didn’t know if I had the right to enter your life as someone more than your friend,” he muttered in one breath. “I don’t even know if what my mother wrote in her diary is true. The only thing I managed to confirm with my father, that is, with Tobias, was that he fell in love with her despite the fact that she was already pregnant with someone else’s child.”
“You live with him, right?” Lucius asked bitterly. He released his grip on Severus’ forearms. His hands dropped to his torso.
Severus Snape swallowed the saliva that filled his mouth with fear. At that moment, no one would have been able to predict Lucius’s reaction to what had happened that summer. His father had died, and he moved in to an orphanage. Ironically, the same orphanage where one of the darkest wizards in modern Great Britain began his life.
After an awkward moment, he began to speak, preparing himself for the blow he knew would come. Severus was a coward. If he had told everyone earlier, he wouldn’t be in this situation now.
xxx
“Mr Black has strained lower back muscles. Such injury can sometimes cause a rise in body temperature. In a tight spot, when you try to ignore it. Your friend should wake up soon, so I think it won’t hurt to stay with him.”
Suddenly, Peter said, “When I lifted Sirius out of bed, I noticed that his bed was damaged. Could that have caused Sirius’s condition?” His cheeks almost immediately turned bright red. “Sirius has a habit of ignoring everything when something is on his mind. Could the wrong position of lying down have harmed him?”
“It’s quite possible, Mr Pettigrew. I’ll have to notify the elves about the damage.”
It wasn’t long before they were alone in the Hospital Wing—it was a time when Madam Pomfrey wasn’t as busy as usual, which is why Sirius was currently her only patient. Thanks to this, they could talk to each other in a more or less casual way.
“What do you think could have happened?” James asked, looking at Peter and Remus. Noticing the Peter’s strange behaviour, he asked, “Do you know anything?” looking at him.
Wormtail said only one word. “Snape.”
“And what does Snivellus have to do with Sirius’s condition?” James didn’t understand at all what was going on.
Pettigrew’s face showed apparent surprise and disbelief before he asked, “You really didn’t notice? Padfoot was always hot-tempered, but recently it is going beyond the boundaries of what is considered normal. He goes mad every time he sees one of the snakes near Snape. Last week he had a fight with Avery less than an hour after he saw Snape kiss him on the cheek. Yesterday he reacted just as violently to the rumours about Snape fucking Rosier... And that’s just two examples.”
At that point, Remus interrupted him, saying, “I know you’re getting at something, but I have no idea what.”
“You’re the smartest of us. You should have guessed. I think Sirius is INTERESTED in Snape in the same way James is interested in Lily. Maybe he doesn’t realise it himself yet but...” he fell silent as if he had suddenly lost the plot. After a moment, Peter started talking again, but James was sure he hadn’t finished his previous thought. “I’m almost convinced that he’s either repressing it from his mind or has gone into denial. You have to remember that until recently he was supposed to inherit the title of Lord Black and father another candidate for that title.” His cheeks were getting redder and redder. “I can’t believe I’m discussing Sirius’ potential reproduction with you. I never wanted to imagine him like that!”
Prongs looked at the sleeping Padfoot. He quickly came to one conclusion, “It’s impossible for you to be right, Peter. If he really... If he really felt something for him, he wouldn’t...” he didn’t have to finish. All three of them knew perfectly well what he meant. If he was in love with Snape, he wouldn’t have taken him to Moony. He would have told them something about his changing feelings. They would have thought of something to help him. They could do it, right?
xxx
While still at Hogwarts, Lucius had sent a letter to his father. He didn’t skirt the subject. He simply asked Abraxas Malfoy directly if his mistress was Eileen Prince—his father’s mistress’s name had never been mentioned in conversations between them—and if a child could have been born from that fling.
He knew him well enough to know that regardless of the answer to the question in the letter, his father would drop whatever he was doing and return to Malfoy Manor without unnecessary delay. That was why, after returning home, he went straight to the study where they had agreed to meet. He was a bit put off by the fact that Tom Riddle had also appeared at this conversation. The matter was private, and they didn’t need any witnesses, but apparently Riddle enjoyed a high level of trust from his father and could be privy to everything.
“Father...” Lucius began. “Judging from your presence, I assume that the letter from me arrived earlier than I had assumed.” He tried to sound calm. “Is it possible for you to have a child with Eileen Prince?”
“It’s not impossible.” Abraxas said carefully. “Who is this child and what evidence does he have of our kinship? Has this person already determined what he wants from us?”
Lucius’ fingers tightened around the wand that jumped into his hand from the holster placed on his forearm. He saw the surprise in the eyes of both wizards. He didn’t care much about it. “The problem is that Severus doesn’t want anything from me! All he wants is to be my friend! My friendship was enough for him, although he could have really got much more.” He felt himself shivering with frustration. He was proud of how much control he could have. Today was revising his opinion of himself more and more. “If it weren’t for the argument between him and Sirius Black, I wouldn’t have found out about anything. Sev wouldn’t have told me anything, despite the situation he was currently in.”
“Severus?” Riddle butted in. “Is this about this Severus Snape you’ve told us so much about and who was here during last Yule?”
Lucius smiled bitterly. “Yes, that’s him.” Suddenly, before his eyes appeared a memory of Snape’s surprise when he told him that he wanted to ask his father to arrange a room for him so that Severus could visit him sometimes. At the time, he thought it was about being too modest. Now it had a different meaning.”
His father, impatient, asked him to explain the situation and Lucius gladly gave it to him. After a few minutes, Abraxas said, “We need to do a kinship test and do it as soon as possible. If it turns out that Severus Snape really is your brother...” his father’s hand began to shake, apparently his indifference was just a mask, “If Severus Snape is your brother, it means that he is a pureblood, so he could become the heir of the Prince family. Augustus would have more rights to him than we do. I already have my heir. The Prince family doesn’t have one.” His father stood up and went to the bar. He prepared three empty glasses. Before he could pour firewhiskey in them, he said, “I don’t know what you were thinking, son, but if Augustus gets involved in this, we’ll lose this boy for an indefinite future.”
Lucius felt as if someone had punched him in the lungs. He couldn’t breathe for a moment. How could he have been so naive? He thought he would have siblings to take care of, completely forgetting what kind of wizard Augustus Prince was. Stern, cold, and uncompromising. If he took Severus as his heir, Severus would disappear from the face of the earth for several years.
He himself remembered how many hours he had spent learning how to manage the Malfoy estate. And he had been doing it since he was a child. Sev would have to make up for lost years, and considering that the Prince family’s fortune was legendary—several times larger than the Malfoys and Potters combined—learning how to manage it would take a lot of time.
All Lucius managed to say was a short, “I understand, Father.”
xxx
Meanwhile, unbeknownst to not only the Malfoys but also the main interested party—Severus—Augustus Prince was already at the end of the procedure necessary to take over custody of his only grandson. Tobias Snape had taken care of providing him with the required documents. The man may not have always been a good father, but there was no doubt that he loved his son.
It was this love that caused him, a year or so before his death—the weakness caused by illness was the cause of his accident at work—to appear in the last place he would ever want to go. Diagon Alley. Armed with his father-in-law’s address, he went to the post office and sent an owl to Augustus Prince.
Eileen had always spoken highly of her father, even after what had happened between them. She refused to talk about Abraxas Malfoy, the wizard who had fathered his son. That was why Tobias had made the only decision that seemed reasonable to him. He didn’t want Severus to be alone in his life, that’s why he wanted him to regain the place in the family that his wife had lost.
Unfortunately, he didn’t have the chance to live to see the day when Augustus could tell him
that he had managed to take custody of his grandson. He also couldn’t tell him that thanks to this, his son had escaped not only Dumbledore, the Marauders, but also the fate of being a Death Eater.
Tobias Snape was never to learn that when his son returned to the Magical community, to his brother and friends, three years of hard work had passed and Severus Snape, as Severus Prince, would not be the same man and wizard who had left behind his brother, his friends, and someone who loved him without hope of reciprocation.