Yes, Dante! You need that Ice dagger!

by BaniShed_ram_head

Summary:

Dante gets into a fight with Vergil, leading them to try and get the Ice Dagger from block tales (with the help of Kim Dokja and some others).

Notes:

THIS IS BASED ON ME AND MY FRIENDS SO IT WILL BE VERY OUT OF CHARACTER! I hope you like the crack I cooked up because i was forced to use a new save file in block tales and missed using the ice dagger! Also I used "[ ]" for Dante instead of "< >" cus the person it's based on likes it more.

Chapter 1: I love gay bars

“Dante, you cannot wear a Hatsune Miku cosplay to work. What will Faust think about this, Dante?” Vergilious stated firmly.

"Tick-tock tick-tock—TRAINNNNNNNNNNNN tick-tock,” was the only thing they could physically say, but they quickly typed something out on their tablet and handed it to Vergil:

[ Look, it’s not my fault Don Quixote wanted me to cosplay her favorite virtual singer, okay? ]

“I’m so tired of your unprofessional behavior, Dante. You barely even gamble for new identities anymore. How are you supposed to beat Ahab and Erlking Heathcliff if you’re still using G-Corp Gregor from Canto 1?!”

[ I’ll level them up more using Mirror Dungeons, trust! ] they typed, slightly panicked.

“No. That’s it. I’m done. I’m taking the sinners to go eat. You can stay on the bus or something, I don’t know. You don’t even eat anyway, so like, whatever.”

‘This dumb bitch, I swear to god. I can beat all of Canto 5 with my G-Corp Gregor and my full team of two-star
cards.

He’s just mad that he’s not as cool as me. You know what? I’m gonna go drink and drive to show him how amazing I am.’

∘₊✧──────✧₊∘

Somehow, Dante ended up at a crowded bar on the other side of the city, with no clear way back. But whatever, they had a plan: show Vergilius who’s better. Step one? Order a drink using the company credit card and look cool doing it.

As they sat on the only empty stool left, they suddenly felt… something. Maybe someone?

The aura in the air felt familiar. It was sacrificial. Faceless. Like them.

Dante scanned the room, and then, they saw him.

A man in a trench coat, almost identical to theirs, but plain white. His face was too blurry to make out clearly, maybe it was the lighting? Dante couldn’t tell.

The obvious move here was to make conversation, because having friends is awesome. So Dante pulled out their tablet and began typing.

[ Hey, I like your coat! It looks cool. ]

“Oh, thanks?”

[ I could just feel the sacrificial energy radiating off of you. ]

“…That’s nice…?”

[ I’m Durante Alighieri, but you can just call me Dante! ]

“…Umm, alright. I would tell you my name, but I don’t have enough motivation,” the man muttered while sipping some bizarre fruit drink that looked like it was meant for tourists in Mexico.

[ Okay! :D ]

Right as Dante finished typing, a girl wearing a Hello Kitty shirt showed up next to blurry-face man and loudly introduced herself. Her name was Ava. She kind of looked like Sinclair. Dante didn’t care.

They chatted for a while about stuff Dante wasn’t paying attention to, until Ava mentioned something called an Ice Dagger. Apparently, it could heal a bit of health and restore SP (which Dante was pretty sure stood for Sanity Points, but they weren’t sure). ‘If only I could get my hands on that,’ Dante thought. ‘Then maybe I wouldn’t suffer as much… and maybe I could finally beat Canto 5 like I told Vergil I could!'

They typed quickly:

[ Where can I find one? ]

Ava blinked, stared at their Miku cosplay for a second, then yelled about it before answering:

“Heh… You can get it by beating Cruel King, obviously.”
Dante had no idea who “Cruel King” was, but they wanted that sword more than anything now.

“I think it might be helpful for later scenarios. I might try to get one, if I can find the motivation,” said blurry-face man, sipping his overly fruity drink.

[ It would be so useful for saving the Sinners mid-battle! ] Dante added.

But by the time they finished typing, Ava had already wandered off to go weed with some friends.

It was then that Dante remembered, they didn’t have a head. They couldn’t drink. So they wrote a quick goodbye to the mysterious man and started walking back toward the bus.

Chapter 2: SFOTH creator got beaten by kids (and lives to regret it)

Notes:

Chapter two cus it was already written! All dialogue comes directly from Block Tales cus it's meant to be a play through. Please give advice on how to write the fight parts cus I have no idea, thanks! Also some of the first half and a little of the end of this was written by one of my friends so full credit to them.

“I think I drank too much,” Kim Dokja mumbled.

As he stumbled into the dark alleyway, he was surprised to see Ava doing weed with a fish with quite muscular legs.

Taken aback, he cried because he didn’t know what to do.

“Uh oh, you’re an emotional drunk,” Ava teased.

—-----------------------------------------------------
“Ryoshu, you CANNOT smoke 5000 cigarettes because you want to do a 'cancer speedrun”. Please put down the burn E.G.O. Firefist Gregor isn’t able to light that many cigarettes at once. ” Dante stated not very calmly, worried about the pain they would have to go through later to revive her from the awaiting lung cancer.

“I.C.L, T.S P.M.O S.M” Ryusho responded, before going outside and taking Gregor with her, since Vergilious wouldn’t let them smoke in the bus.

“I think she said something like, “I can live, this stuff probably manages overflow for so many,” but I’m not too sure…” Sinclair budded in, being the only one to understand her.

“I’m gonna go after them before Gregor dissorts due to holding an E.G.O for too long or something,” Dante announced to the 10 people who could actually hear them, before running after Ryusho.

While they were trying to find the smokers, they realized that they ended up on some random street with no one nearby, so the best thing to do was to go into the nearest alleyway, where it would be easier to be killed.

—------------------

“I found the secret stash, twin! 😂✌️” Ava casually told Kim Dokja. “I have no idea why you’re crying, though. Is this like your first time seeing someone do weed? Here, come join us!”

Weirdly enough, there was no “us”; just Ava and her hallucinations talking to each other.

“Cool, so do you like cosplay or something? Do you know that weird man who looks like a clock and a drug dealer? OH MY GOD HE HAD A MIKU WIG I SWEAR-”

Kim Dokja winced at the sudden volume change.

As Ava kept talking Dokja’s ears off, Dante seemiingly appeared out of fucking nowhere.

“OH MY GOD IT’S HATSUNE MIKU AS A WEIRD SUSPICIOUS CLOCK SHAPED DRUG DEALER!!!!11!!!1!1!!1!!!1!!!”

As Dokja suddenly turned around, he realized that Ava wasn’t spitting random bs.

“A- A- A!!!”

—-----------------

Kim Dokja woke up to Dante carrying him. It appeared he passed out from exhaustion, Ava screaming, and drinking a bit too much.

“Ugh… my head hurts.. DUDE WHERE AM I????”

[Lock in, twin! We’re gonna go get the Ice Dagger!] Dante typed with one hand while walking.

“Okay, so the first thing we need to do is go to Roblox HQ!!!!” Ava said extremely loudly. “Press tab to open menu, then go to Bizville. It shouldn’t be too hard.”

Suddenly, all three of them got teleported to a random town, and for some reason, they all had weird white outlines.

[Why does it say 'walk to Roblox HQ? Are we in a game or something?]

“Uhhhhh, you’ll see soon…heh”

[Okay! :D]

While walking around, Dante found a man who sold a card called “lucky start.” They weren’t sure why they would need it, but gambling was gambling, so they decided to save up. The two of them walked (with Dante still carrying Dokja) around a bit more before Ava decided to ask someone for directions instead of getting lost. The person they asked told them that they were on the wrong side of town and pointed them in the right direction.

“We’re finally here! Oh, the thing changed.” Dokja pointed out, still being carried by Dante.

[yeah…it says “find Shedletsky” now.. Wonder what that could mean…]

“Heh…. you’ll see soon!” Ava responded, trying to brush off the question while running ahead.

They walked through Roblox HQ for a bit before getting into a fight with some small noob.

[Who the fuck is this? Why is it so ugly and small?]

“Guys use ball!”

“I would, but I don’t have enough motivation, sorry,” Dokja said before using defend.

(- Ave used Ball on Nooblet
- Dante used Ball on Nooblet
- Dokja used Defend
- Nooblet collapsed!
YOU WON!)

[Oh dear…that was tough…good thing I don't need to revive you guys!...right?]

“I can revive myself, so you should be okay.”

The three of them walked up the stairs, dashing to avoid enemies. When they finally got to the top and went through the badly placed door, Dante saw some weirdly colored kids beating up an old man.

“....ANDD STAY DOWNNN! Take that, bucko!” the red one yelled in a way that resembled a maniac.

“Jeez…Red, you really knocked him flat on his back…
… You think he’s out for good this time?” the blue one said gently, her voice had a bit of concern to it.

“HAHH! I HAVE NO IDEA!!!!!
But NOBODY can stop us!!! We’re inseparable!!!!!”

“Awww…thanks, Red”

“WAHAHAHHAH!!!”

Ava started walking towards the kids at a rapid pace, with the other two tailing behind closely. As soon as they got close, the blue one started looking extremely worried.

“.. uhm..red?”

“THE POWER OF RED AND BLUE COMPELLS YOU!!!
VICTORIOUS ONCE AGAIN!!! WAHAHAHAHAH!!” The red one yelled, not noticing anyone approaching.

“RED, TURN AROUND!”

The red one looked and finally noticed the people behind them.

“...
Yo, chump! Who do you think you are?”

The blue one budded in “You’re just in time!”.

“ ‘cause we’re RED and BLUE!!!
And we’ll CRUSH YOU!!!” the red one finished.

“Damn why is red built like a flaming hot tampon 💀” Ava whispered, only loud enough for the weird sacrificial people she was with to hear.

[You realize I'm also fully red, right?]

As Ava opened her mouth, the three of them got dragged into a battle.

(- Ava used Ball on Blue Noob!
- Dante used Ball on Red Noob!
- Dokja used Ball on Red Noob!
- Blue Noob used Stab on Ava!
- Ava countered!!!
- Red Noob used Stab on Dante!
- Ava used Ball on Blue Noob!
- Blue Noob collapsed
- Dante used Ball on Red Noob!
- Dokja used Ball on Red Noob!
- Red Noob collapsed
YOU WON!)

“..crap…this isn’t good” the blue one muttered.

“OWWW…what the heck, man?!”

“Red…we gotta tell the boss about this..”

“WHATTT!!!? No way mannnnn”

“C’mon! Make a break for it.”

‘“Wahhhhhhhhhhhhh”

As soon as the red one said that, they both flipped behind the rock. This left the weird yellow chicken man defenseless on the floor.

“Aughhhh
D-don’t let them get away…
They..took builderman…
He’s been kidnapped…
…
Someone’s trying to..they..
They want to find the…
SWORD FIGHT ON THE HEIGHTS swords…
Take this wooden sword…
Use it to break those planks..
G-go after them…please
His fate is in your hands…
Please…find…him…”

The man reached out, giving a wooden sword to everyone in the trio. It didn't look high quality, but then again. The weird chicken man gave it to them, so whatever. Dante recalled seeing a bunch of wood on the other side of the building so maybe thats what he meant. They realized that it would be a good idea to type it out for the others, since they couldn’t telepathically communicate anymore.

Notes:

Chapter two when I feel like it (it's already finished and will be posted sometime this week).