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Puzzle Solvers

Summary:

It’s a slow day in the office, so Blitz looks to Moxxie to curb his boredom.

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Even a booming business had its slow days.

Which meant the perfect opportunity to step out of the stuffy office and grab a refreshing iced coffee! And a little something for everyone else of course. This time was Millie’s turn to go out though. And since the phones weren’t going off like crazy, she invited Stolas out with her to get more familiar with the neighborhood.

So Blitz found himself left with Loona and Moxxie.

And unbelievably bored out of his mind.

His daughter was currently napping, so bugging her was out of the question. As if he’d disturbe his baby girl’s beauty sleep! What kind of father would he be? A terrible one, that’s what!

Leaving the IMP founder with only one option.

“Hey, whatcha got there, Moxx? A new porno mag?”

“What? Ew, no! That’s not workplace appropriate.”

Blitz waved him off. “Oh it’s fine. I used to do it all the time.”

“Of course you did,” Moxxie replied bluntly before showing the little book in his hand, “I’m actually playing sudoku, sir.”

“Suck-off-what?”

The smaller imp pinched the bridge between his eyes.

“Not suck- Sudoku. That’s not even remotely close to what I said!”

“The fuck is it?”

“It’s a popular puzzle game involving numbers.” He showed the game he was currently filling out. “The goal is to fill out all the squares with a number between 1 and 9. But you can’t repeat a number in the same column or row.”

Blitz squinted at page. Though all he could make out was a bunch of random numbers, both written and typed. What the hell kinda game was this??

“Yeah… Because when I think games, I think math.”

“There’s actually no math involved.”

“Sure there isn’t. Look Moxx, I get you like doing our finances and shit, but you really gotta focus on math on your time off too?”

“It’s not- I don’t do our finances for the fun of it, sir. I do them because they need to be done. This, however, I do play for fun.”

This is supposed to fun??”

“It is actually. Look, let me show you.” Moxxie flipped through the pages before laying the book open on a clean page. “This one is mostly filled out already so it should be easy to learn from. Let’s focus on this box. There’s three blank squares to fill out. Looking at the other numbers, the three missing numbers are 4, 5, and 8.”

“Okaaaaaay…” Blitz mumbled, actually trying to follow along, “So, just fill out those spots with those numbers?”

“Yes, but you need to know which number goes where first.”

“Can’t I just put any of them there and fill out as I go?”

“No. Each number goes in a specific square.”

“Well how the hell am I supposed to find that out?”

“By looking at the columns and rows.” He pointed along the puzzle. “So look. There’s a 5 in these two columns, so that leaves the middle column available. One of the blank squares is in the middle. So where does the 5 for that box go?”

“Uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh… In that middle spot?” Blitz asked pensively.

“Exactly! Good job, sir!”

“Oh shit, really? Well, fuck me, this is easy!” He grabbed the leftover pen and wrote in a backwards 5. “Alright, what next?”

“Try figuring out where 4 goes.”

“4… 4… Uh… Hold on… Fuck, so many tiny ass numbers… Where are the 4s??”

“Don’t forget to check the rows too.”

The taller imp squinted as he scanned the puzzle in search of 4s. Except he couldn’t figure out where that specific 4 needed to go. The ones he did find, weren’t in the rows or columns he needed!

“What the fuck, Moxx, there’s no 4s here!”

“It’s there, you gotta find where the others go first.”

“Find the others first? What happened to staying in the box??”

Moxxie rolled his eyes. “You don’t have to stay in the box, sir. You have the whole puzzle to look through.”

“Can’t I just guess or something? There’s only two options. 4’s bound to be in one of those.”

“You can’t just guess! … Or… Well, you can. But you can’t fill them out on a whim either. There could be a 4 in the same row or column.”

“Well, which one is it then??”

“Let’s look for the 8. If you find the 8, that’ll leave you with one square left for the 4.”

“Ugh, fine. Okay, uh, 8… 8… Fucking- There’s no 8 either!”

“Yes, there is. There’s an 8 right there.”

“That’s the middle column! The two spots aren’t in the middle!”

“Then we go to the next box.”

“What, why??”

“Because you can’t solve where the 4 and 8 go in that box yet. The more of the puzzle you fill out, the more likely you’ll figure out where they go.”

“Ugggghhhh! Fine. Which one?”

“Let’s look at this one. It’s also got three blank squares. So which numbers are missing?”

“I dunno, they’re not in order.”

Moxxie face palmed. “Count the numbers then, sir. From 1 to 9, which ones are missing?”

The taller imp looked back at the book. His face scrunched in thought.

“Uh, 1… Oh, 2’s missing! Uh, 3… No 4! 5… 6 too! Now there’s… 7… 8-”

“Sir? You found the three missing numbers.”

“I did?”

“Yes… You counted them?”

“... I did?”

The smaller demon rubbed his face. “Yes, you did.”

“… And those are…?”

“2, 4, and 6, sir.”

“Pfft, I knew that!”

“Of course you did… Now try to figure out where they go. Remember to look through each column and row.”

“Yeah, I got this, don’t worry. Totally easy.” Blitz scanned the puzzle once more, muttering to himself. “Uh, 6… 6… One there… One there… That leaves… What the fuck, there’s two spots a 6 can be in!”

“Then find one of the other two numbers.”

“Let’s see… 2 then… There’s only one 2 in all these boxes! How am I supposed to figure out where it goes??”

“The other number then, sir,” Moxxie replied bluntly, losing his patience.

“Uh, 4… 4, 4… There’s only one 4 too! I can’t solve this box!”

“Try the next box. The more numbers you find, the easier it’ll be to-” He paused seeing Blitz start filling in the squares. “What’re you doing?”

“What’s it look like, I’m solving this damn thing.”

“But you’re not- You’re just filling it in! You can’t just put random numbers!”

“And why not huh? What bitch says I can’t?”

“It’s the rules of sudoku, sir! The numbers won’t fit if you write them in at random!”

“Oh I’ll make ‘em fit, don’t worry. Just gotta write over the pre-written ones, that’s all.”

“You can’t just-” Moxxie took a breath. “That’s not how it works, Blitz.”

The IMP boss rolled his eyes. “I don’t see the big deal. What, your tight little ass can’t handle that my way’s easier than your way?”

“It’s not my way! It’s just how sudoku is supposed to be solved! You deduce where each missing number is to match the answer key!”

The taller imp’s head suddenly popped up. “Wait, there’s a fucking answer key??”

“Uh, yes? It’s a puzzle. And like a picture puzzle, there’s a proper place for each piece to get the full picture. It’s the literally the same with sudoku.”

“Well why the fuck didn’t you mention the answer key? Where is it so I can solve this damn thing?”

“Wha- You can use the answer key to solve it! That’s cheating!”

“The hell I can! You just compared it to a picture puzzle! Who doesn’t look at the full picture while trying to put the pieces together?!”

“This is a different kind of puzzle!”

“Then you should’ve used a different analogy! Now where’s the damn answer key!?”

“Just solve it normally!”

“I did try to solve and you started twisting my dick over it!”

“First of all, EW! And second, because you weren’t doing it right!”

“Says you!”

“Says the rules of sudoku!”

“Where’s the answer key!?”

“It’s in the back of the fucking book, holy shit!!”

Both imps jumped at the third voice and turned to see a grumpy and tired looking Loona glaring at them.

“Unless we have a client, will you two shut the fuck up all ready?!”

“Sorry sweetie, didn’t mean to wake you up. You go ahead and go back to sleep.”

“Gladly. Satan bless…”

Blitz quickly flipped the pages to the back of the book and smirked smugly at his employe, “See Moxx, now was that so hard?”

Moxxie rolled his eyes in annoyance. 

Just then, the door burst open and in came the two missing IMP members.

“We’re baaaaack~” Millie announced singsongy before bringing the tray of drinks to the meeting table, Stolas following behind her.

“Oh finally!” Blitz grabbed his drink from the tray and slurped it up. “Ahhh~ Nothing like a good rush of icy caffeine in the middle of the day.”

“I must say, it was… An interesting experience,” Stolas commented before pointing at Moxxie, “They did have a bit of trouble getting yours right.”

“Of course they did…”

Millie giggled before going over with his order and kissing his cheek, “Don’t worry, I made sure they did it right.”

“Thanks honey,” Moxxie replied fondly as he took the drink from her. 

“So what happened while we were out? Any clients?”

Before Moxxie or Blitz could answer, Loona spoke for them, “These two decided to fight over sudoku of all things.”

“Moxxie was being an ass over it.”

Blitz was doing it wrong.”

“See! He’s still being an ass! But jokes on him, I’m gonna use the answer key to solve it!”

The sniper expert shot an annoyed glare, watching his boss once again flip through the pages. 

“… Good luck finding the correct answer key by the way.”

“The what answer key?”