Laurië Lassi

by Neldoriel

Summary:

For the first time in his life, he had a bright future. He finally understood what it meant to be unconditionally loved, and accepted. He had found his place in the world, he was at home.

 

Set in the world of season two, we follow the story of Neldoriel, a Noldor Elf, as she discovers Adar’s Uruk camp while on her travels through Middle Earth. Over time they get to know each other, and he finally finds love and acceptance after his long years of loneliness and pain. She helps him overcome his traumatic past and find spiritual redemption and together they find peace among the golden leaves.

Chapter 1: Neldoriel

 

It was the Second Age in Middle Earth. Among the trees of a vast forest in the land of Eriador, a lone Elven woman rested quietly, watching the river in the distance. The colour of her hair that she had inherited from her mother was reminiscent of the crackling campfire she sat beside, its flames flickering and dancing in the cool midnight breeze. For over a thousand years she had travelled around Middle Earth. As she watched the flames, her mind wandered to her past. 

Her parents had come to Middle Earth in the First Age. To try and escape the war, the Elves had sought to create a new life for themselves in peace, in a remote woodland not too far from the land that was now known as Eregion. Surrounding the woods were grassy plains where wild horses ran free. Her parents built a beautiful cabin made from wood and stone, nestled in the trees on the edge of the woods, overlooked by a majestic weeping beech tree. It was for her beloved forests and woodlands that Neldoriel took her name, nature was a part of who she was. Sadly they were no longer with her and she missed them dearly.

Getting up from the campfire to stretch her legs, she walked over to her horse who was idly foraging about for anything edible he could find. The dapple grey horse noticed her and came trotting to her happily, he snuffled at her hair affectionately and pushed her with his nose. She giggled and scratched his chin in greeting. She loved horses and her bond with him was unbreakable.

Stroking the side of his silvery grey face, she touched her forehead to his as she spoke softly to him. “Suilad, Thalion.” He was a descendant of a rare race of horses, intelligent and strong, with a lifespan longer than that of ordinary horses.

It was time to move on. She decided to head for Eregion to go and spend some time among her kin. Being near her homeland might bring her comfort, she thought. Packing away her things, she paused and took a moment to look at her sword with reverence. It once belonged her father and she she had kept it for all these years, a lightweight steel blade, expertly crafted by the finest Noldor smiths during the First Age, it was artistically and beautifully formed with exquisite detail, with a dark blue-grey sapphire embedded into the pommel. It matched the colour of her and her father’s eyes. Mounting her horse, she pulled up the hood of her woodland green cloak and they set off on their way.

 

*

 

A few years passed, a fleeting amount of time to an Elf. Neldoriel had been staying in a small house which she had been graciously been allowed the use of by an old friend. She passed the days simply enjoying Elven life, it was nice to have a break from living in the wilderness sometimes.

One morning as she was strolling down a beautiful stone walkway, enjoying the morning sun as it came up above the high walls of the city of Ost-in-Edhil, she happened to overhear a conversation between a couple of young Elves about some rumours of trouble in the Southlands. She stopped and sat down by the fountain as if deep in thought, while quietly listening in to the conversation. The young Elves continued to talk about how the land had been destroyed, and how it was now a land of darkness. She didn’t know whether to believe it or if this was just gossip.

Curiosity got the better of her and she decided she was going to travel there and see for herself. She had spent long enough in the society of Eregion and was ready to journey out into the wilds again. She made the necessary preparations and soon set off for life on the road once again. 

 

 

Suilad is a way of saying hello in Sindarin. It means ‘Greetings’

Thalion means ‘strong, dauntless, steadfast’ in Sindarin.

Chapter 2: Adar

 

She travelled for a few weeks on horseback. As she got closer to the region of the Southlands, Neldoriel could indeed see that things here had changed. The atmosphere was different, and as she got closer, it did indeed seem to get darker. Wanting to learn more, she pressed on. This land that was once beautiful, with its green and sprawling landscape, had changed. It was turning into a dusty, barren wasteland the further in she went. Everything was covered with a grey hue, the sun’s rays were nowhere to be seen. What had happened here, she wondered. It was a troubling situation.

She halted and got down from her horse, she did not wish for him to go further into this area, not knowing what danger might lurk here. So she sent him away, back toward the green grasslands she had come from, knowing that he wouldn’t go too far. She continued on foot and before too long she could hear voices up ahead with the sound of clanging weapons and shuffling feet. “Orcs” she whispered to herself, her sensitive Elf ears could hear them a mile off. She followed them, at a distance, she wanted to know what they were up to. 

She quickly saw that they had human prisoners with them and they were leading them somewhere. From what she had been able to gather, they were taking them to a leader of theirs. Interesting. The last time she had heard of Orcs having a leader were in the days of Morgoth and Sauron.

 

Eventually the small band of Orcs arrived at a large encampment with the prisoners, set up amongst the remnants of destroyed buildings. It was bustling, there weren’t just Orcs here but men too, with some shouting out orders. There were people here who appeared to be slaves, forced to work for some unknown reason. Some were completing tasks under close supervision and some had been locked into wooden cages.

She knew it wasn’t safe to linger here and had she been a more sensible Elf, she would have turned around and left at once. But as always, she was curious and crept closer, wanting to find out more. She was fully in the camp now, carefully and stealthily making her way through, avoiding being seen. She hid behind some crates that were next to a tent, from here she was able to watch a bit of what was going on. An old man was barking orders, directing Orcs on where to take the prisoners.

“Take this lot to the cells until Adar gives further instructions, they either work for us or they will die.” The old man said with a nasty and smug sort of authority to the Orcs that were herding the prisoners along. 

What was going on here, Neldoriel wondered, and who was Adar? She assumed this must be the leader she heard Orcs speak of earlier that day.

Suddenly she felt metal touching the back of her neck. “Fovren.” She muttered, cursing herself for not paying enough attention. The tip of an arrow was pointing at her and she slowly rose to her feet from her crouching position, hands raised in surrender.

“Well, what do we ‘ave ere then?” sneered a gangly Orc, aiming a bow.

Another that was stood nearby spoke too, “Look at the ears, it’s a filthy Elf! I’ll kill you where you stand!”
A commotion started as Orcs were so prone to and they began fighting with one another about what to do with this intruder. 

“We take this one straight to Adar” bellowed a larger and more intimidating Orc. The smaller ones conceded and they bound Neldoriel, also taking her weapons. She felt desperation as she watched her father’s beloved sword being taken away. 

*

She was brought, bound, into a large tent. It was ramshackle, roughly built, dreary but functional. It was constructed of wooden poles and beams, dull brown fabrics and animal skins. These were the living quarters of their leader. There was a wooden table and chairs that she could see, and a little fireplace. There were other separate areas of the tent that were out of view, presumably sleeping quarters and the like. She was roughly shoved along by the Orcs and made to stand near a thick wooden pole.

“We caught this one lurking around Lord Father, it’s a She-Elf, likely sent here by their High King to spy on us” the Orc grunted.
Neldoriel looked back over her shoulder with a look of irritation. 

“You may leave us, my son. I will question the Elf”. Came a voice from the shadows. It was a deep and gravelly voice that carried authority and power, and yet quiet and mysterious. He spoke in almost a whisper. A voice which seemed to carry the cares of all the ages of the world as a weary yet strong and powerful leader.

Despite the situation she found herself in, the sound of his voice captivated her. She thought it was strange, this person sounded nothing like an Orc, yet he had said ‘my son’. 

“Who are you? You must be the one they call Adar?” Neldoriel questioned. 

“Who said you are allowed to speak, Elf!” Growled the Orc as he raised his weapon towards her.

“Enough! I said leave us.” The figure from the shadows said in a more authoritative tone. The Orc bowed submissively and shuffled out of the room. 

Neldoriel scanned the room, to try and see who this was that was speaking from the shadows. And with that, a figure came into view. He moved with grace and elegance, he had a look and aura that she knew to be unmistakably Elven, she sensed that he was one of her own, yet.. different. There was a darkness to him but he definitely wasn’t an Orc either. Long dark hair fell down past his shoulders, his face was covered with scars but despite this, he was handsome. He was lean and slenderly built, and he carried himself with a certain nobility. But most of all, she noticed his expressive pale blue eyes which seemed to hold so much depth within them.

His black armour was engraved with the pattern of a river and he carried a huge and elegant dark Elvish Greatsword at his side. He wore an intimidating metal gauntlet on his left hand, black and spiked. These personal effects were worn out and ancient looking but beautiful and exquisite.

What was his story, she wondered. 

 

He walked slowly and purposefully over to her and she couldn’t help but keep her eyes fixed on his graceful, fluid movements. He removed the ropes that had been binding her hands together.

“Forgive my children, their culture and ways you are unlikely to be accustomed to. A wild and fierce people, but as needing of a home as any other race. A home is what I have created for them here. We do not often receive Elves in our company, and when we do, it is usually not under the best of circumstances.” 

He was taller than her, and she looked up at him, taking in his presence. After a moment, he retreated back and seated himself on a wooden chair. He gestured to her to take a seat also but Neldoriel remained standing. She was perplexed, why was he referring to the Orcs as his children? And speaking of them with such affection.

“So it is you who has done this to the Southlands? To create a home for the Orcs. Your… children?”

“Uruk, is what we prefer to be called. And yes, these are no longer the Southlands, it is now known as the land of Mordor.” He looked at her, interested to see her reaction. He knew Elves to be great lovers of nature and she would likely be troubled by this. No reaction came so he continued, “We have endured much, the Uruk are a reviled and misunderstood race. This place is to be a safe haven for my children to raise their offspring and live in peace.”

She listened to him in wonder. She was saddened at how this once beautiful land had been ravaged and turned into this desolate wasteland, but she could also sympathise with the Uruks. She had no quarrel with them, they did indeed have no home, and were hated. She could understand Adar’s desire to create a place for them to live in peace and safety.

“I understand. They do deserve a home. They are creatures of this world as much as any other”.

He looked at her with mild disbelief although his face didn’t show it, he remained unreadable. He had expected some sort of a high and mighty or mocking response, it was what he was used to, but this one showed kindness and understanding.

“Who are you?” He asked her.

“My name is Neldoriel, of the Noldor.” 

“Noldor… and why are you here, did you come alone?” He questioned her, trusting no one. 

“There’s only me, I travel alone. I’m a wanderer of sorts, I suppose. I came here simply out of curiosity, I don’t mean any harm to anyone.”

“And what am I to do with you I wonder? My Uruks are agitated by your presence here, Uruk and Elven-kind never have cared for one another.”

“But are you not an Elf yourself?” Neldoriel questioned. He certainly had the look and mannerisms of one. She could sense that he was of her own kin.

Adar said nothing. He studied her for a moment, at first taken aback by this question, then he looked away, gazing into nothingness. There was a look in his eyes, of sadness, as if he were recalling something from his past that was causing him pain. Neldoriel did not fail to notice this and she felt sympathy for him. The moment was fleeting and at once his expression darkened. He was not going to answer her question, that was quite clear.

He watched her curiously. He admired her boldness, not many in her position would have dared ask such a question. Many prisoners had been brought before him, bowing and scraping in an attempt to save their own skin. But not this young, red haired Elf. She had a gentle way about her, and kindness, but she had a fire within. She intrigued him.

Intentionally ignoring her words from before, he continued where he left off.

“I can’t possibly let you go, I do not know yet that you are who you say you are. It would be unwise to risk releasing a potential spy back to Gil-Galad.”

“I’m not a spy…”

“And I am to believe that?” Adar cut her off. “The logical thing to do would be to have you executed.”

Neldoriel stood quietly, awaiting the decision on her fate to be made.

Adar exhaled. Despite himself, he knew he couldn’t allow her to be executed. Although on the surface he was the powerful Father of the Uruks, there was part of him that he kept hidden that was gentle and respectful of life. His Uruks wouldn’t like it, but he would keep her here for now, to observe her and to make sure she wasn’t a threat before he would consider releasing her. The safety of his children coming before all else.

“I will not see you killed, nor will any harm come to you. However, I cannot let you leave. You will stay here in the camp under close watch.” He called out in a harsh and dark sounding language that she knew to be Black Speech and a pair of Uruks appeared at the door.

“Take her to the guest quarters. She is not to be harmed but is to be kept under supervision at all times” he told them with an air of authority. The Uruks both nodded respectfully and led her away. Adar leaned back on his wooden chair, contemplating all that had just happened.

 

Neldoriel was brought to a smaller tent, not too far from Adar’s. She was firmly but not roughly, taken into the tent. They had listened to their father’s command that she was not be harmed.

“No trying to escape, Elf. There’s lots of us watching you” said an Uruk in the typical rough accent.

“Wouldn’t dream of it” Neldoriel answered overly sweetly and slightly sarcastically. She wasn’t used to being ordered about like this.
The Uruk hissed and shuffled away out the door. 

Now that she was alone, she looked around at her surroundings. It was ramshackle, like everything else here, but just about liveable. She had stayed in worse places over the years, she thought with amusement. Adar had called it the ‘guest quarters’. This made her laugh internally, what sort of guests were they possibly expecting to have in a place like this?

It was a circular shaped tent, it had had the basics, a rough small wooden table, a chair, a bed. She was surprised, she expected to have been dragged off to a prison cell.

Do Orcs actually have manners and courtesy for guests? No, this must be down to their leader. He calls himself an Uruk but he is different to them. He is sophisticated, intelligent, and respectful. She wanted to know more about him.

Going over to the bed and lying down on it, she stared up at the cloth ceiling of the tent and wondered what tomorrow would bring. She wasn’t worried for her horse, she knew he would stay away and out of harms reach. Tiredness took over so she closed her eyes and allowed herself to drift off to sleep in this strange place.

 

Note:

 Fovren translates to ‘Fool’ In Sindarin 

 

Chapter 3: Sendassë

 

Neldoriel awoke the next morning in the guest tent, she had slept reasonably well despite the less than luxurious bed and the fact that she was being held prisoner. She got up off the bed and wandered around the tent, taking it all in. It just needed some finishing touches to make it more homely, she thought to herself. Some more furnishings, perhaps a nice fur rug on the floor.

After daydreaming about decorating the shabby tent, she thought she would try her luck and see if she would be able to leave without being stopped. Unsurprisingly there were Uruks posted at her door who wouldn’t allow her to leave. Claiming it was Adar’s orders that she is to remain in her tent and to go back inside. Begrudgingly she went back inside and sat down on the bed. This was going to drive her mad, cooped up here with nothing to do.

Hours passed, at one point a plate of food was brought in to her by an Uruk. It was strange looking food but she was hungry, so she picked at a bit of it. She tried a new angle in an attempt to leave the tent, asking if she could leave in order to relieve herself. She was abruptly informed that there was a chamber pot under the bed for such things. She put her hand to her forehead and shook her head in exasperation. There really was no escape. 

 

After what seemed like a whole day of complete boredom and going stir crazy pacing around the tent, Neldoriel was lying down on the bed, wide awake and lost in her own thoughts. She could sense someone coming. None other than Adar appeared at the door. Neldoriel sat up tentatively.

“May I come in?” He asked courteously. It wasn’t really a request, he would have come in anyway even if the answer had been no, but he would extend hospitality nonetheless. 

“Yes.” Neldoriel answered. At this point she was so bored she would have welcomed a cave troll with open arms. She was glad to have some company, especially that of this mysterious captor of hers.

Adar walked into the tent with the same graceful motion that she had seen the day before.
“My apologies for your long stay in this tent and for not coming sooner, I had matters to attend to.”

“What matters were those, capturing innocent Southlanders and making them slaves?” She bit her lip and looked away. “Sorry. I don’t mean to be irritable, but I’ve been going mad in here, trapped in this tent with no end in sight.”

Adar looked at her with amusement, here she was again asking these bold questions. Anyone else would have been put in chains for such a comment, but for some reason he let her get away with it.

“I can see that this troubles you. I can assure you, I do not take delight in it. I am simply doing what must be done.”

She didn’t like it, but she was as ever, trying to see things from the other side.

“I understand. You need to claim this land fully for the Orcs, I mean- Uruks” she added politely. “So that means complete submission from those that may stand to oppose you.” She paused for a moment and then continued. “Also, the Uruks, they follow strength. It is necessary to rule with an iron fist.” She couldn’t help but look at the gauntlet on his hand as she said this.

Adar was again surprised at the understanding she was showing towards him and his children and he looked at her intently.

Neldoriel added hopefully: “Perhaps, once it is firmly established that these lands belong to the Uruks; and the work that is taking place here is finished, I wonder if the prisoners could be released?” 

The way she spoke so sweetly, her purity and the innocence of this request. It touched his guarded heart. He answered quietly. “I will consider it”.

A moment passed in silence. Adar seemed lost in thought. Neldoriel broke the silence.

“I understand that you do not trust me, and you cannot let me leave, but am I to stay in this tent indefinitely? It would be preferable to be executed I think.” She was only half joking.

“Come with me”. He answered.

Neldoriel was surprised by this, but hastened to get up from the bed that she had been perched on, keen to leave that tent and get some air. Adar turned and left the tent and Neldoriel followed at his side. He took her all around the encampment so she could get an idea of where things are. 

“I can see that you desire more freedom. You may leave your quarters and wander around the camp if you wish, no harm will come to you. But I cannot risk you running off to the Elves with information that would be used to launch an attack on us. You will be watched at every step.”

Neldoriel was annoyed that she was being treated with such suspicion. She had no intention of running to anyone with information, she would rather just go back to the woods and leave this dreary place. She was glad though to have been granted this small amount of freedom, and she was still very intrigued by this Adar. Maybe it wouldn’t be so bad being here for a while, she was interested in learning more about the Uruks. When not agitated they seemed to be reasonably peaceful, she had noticed while walking around the camp.

They arrived back at her tent. By now night had fallen and she was content to return and get some sleep.

“Goodnight, Adar. And thank you.” He nodded in acknowledgment and left her at the door of her tent, turning and walking away towards the direction of his own.

Neldoriel went and settled down on her bed, allowing sleep to take her.

Notes:

Sendassë means ‘guesthouse’ in Quenya.

Chapter 4: Uruk Life

 

The next morning came and Neldoriel, glad to have been granted some freedom, walked out the door of her tent, only to be greeted by a young female Uruk. She was of small build and for an Uruk, reasonably pleasant looking. 

“My name is Ûlfa. Adar sent me to watch over you and make sure you don’t get into any trouble” the Uruk had told her. Neldoriel didn’t really mind, as far as Uruks went, she seemed quite reasonably tempered and almost curious, rather than the aggression that she had encountered before.

“It’s nice to meet you, Ûlfa” Neldoriel replied, giving a small and polite bow. Ûlfa looked at the Elf with a frown on her face.

Deciding to take a walk and look around a bit more, Neldoriel wandered through the camp, her feet treading lightly on the rough, muddy ground as she quietly wove her way through the labyrinth of ramshackle tents and hanging sheets of fabric. The sounds of clanging metal and the guttural voices of the Uruks filled the air as she explored, with Ûlfa following along a short distance behind. Every now and then, Uruks would look up at her from what they were doing, with a grumble or a sideways glance. They weren’t used to having an Elf walking freely among them.

 

After a while she came to a part of the camp that she hadn’t seen before. Against a crumbling old lean-to there was a roughly constructed pen, which housed a few horses. Neldoriel’s heart leapt a little at the sight of them, horses never failed to draw her in. And then her eyes wandered to the dark figure that was leaning against the wooden fence. Adar appeared to be lost in thought as he gazed across the horse pen, as if he were reminiscing about something. Neldoriel started to leave, but she was unable to help herself and approached the horse pen.

“Good morning Adar. You didn’t tell me you had horses out here”. She said brightly. 

He glanced at her over his shoulder. “Do not get any ideas.” 

She rolled her eyes. “I’m being watched everywhere I go, I wouldn’t dare.”

He studied her for a moment before turning back to the horse pen in silence.

“Is that why you didn’t bring me out here when you showed me around the camp last night? In case I took a horse and made a run for it?” She asked him.

“You wouldn’t get very far if you tried it.” He replied confidently, while still looking out over the horses.

“Who would be able to catch me? I’m a fast rider”. She teased.

“Then it is a good thing I am faster, I would catch up to you easily”. He replied, turning his attention to her with a smirk. 

“I don’t think you could.” She replied with a playful sort of defiance. 

He looked at her, his eyes sparkling with interest. He liked her spirit, it was a breath of fresh air in his otherwise dark and oppressive world.

She came to stand beside him, leaning her arms on the wooden fence, admiring the horses as they milled about in the pen. 

“They are lovely horses. I suppose you must like them too, as you are out here with them”. She said thoughtfully. 

“Yes. I like to come here sometimes, for some quiet. And to think.” Adar replied softly. 

She looked up at Adar, curiously. There was so much under the surface with him. 

 

Before she had chance to say any more, there was the sound of feet approaching and a weathered looking man came into view. Neldoriel recognised him as the one who was giving out orders a few days ago. A miserable and foul old man whose only true loyalty was to himself.

“Lord-Father.” The old man bowed curtly. “We have urgent matters that require your attention. For your ears only.” He said, eyeing Neldoriel suspiciously.

“I will be there shortly, Waldreg.”

With a nod and a grunt, Waldreg turned and shuffled away with a sour look on his face. 

“Well, he’s pleasant.” Neldoriel remarked sarcastically. 

Adar gave a small smirk but made no comment. 

“If you will excuse me, Neldoriel.” He turned to Ûlfa who had been standing nearby in the shadows. “Keep a close eye on this one.” There was no harshness in his tone, he almost seemed as if he were joking.

“Yes, Lord Father!” Ûlfa replied obediently, eager to please her leader. 

Neldoriel had no desire to leave anyway, she was enjoying being here and slowly getting to know her mysterious and dark companion.

 

Over the next few days she busied herself with helping out with some jobs that needed doing around the camp. She liked keeping busy. She also met with Adar a few more times and they would talk and walk around the camp together, growing more familiar with each other by the day. She noticed him looking at her sometimes. Those soulful eyes of his conveying thoughts yet unknown to her.

She asked him about the creation of Mordor and he had been willing to tell her. He explained about how the eruption of Orodruin was caused and how that how the release of the ash and volcanic gases into the atmosphere protected his children from the sunlight which harms them. She felt like she was getting to know him a little more, she wanted to know more about his past too but she didn’t pry, she knew he was uncomfortable talking about it. 

 

**

 

One afternoon, Adar watched Neldoriel as she went around the camp with her Uruk companion. It fascinated him to see her complete lack of prejudice and how she instead treated Ûlfa and the other Uruks with kindness and respect. He liked having someone to talk to, someone like him. It was unlocking something within him and he found himself increasingly wanting to be in her presence, so he took it upon himself to go and seek her out.

She had gone to go and help with some chores in one of the Uruk tents. This particular tent was a kitchen of sorts where some kind of stew was being prepared. There was a lively atmosphere, with the noise of water boiling, knives chopping, and metal utensils clinking. Steam rose from a large pot in the middle of the tent and the smell of food cooking wafted through the air. 

Ûlfa was in charge of a group of female Uruks, delegating tasks and overseeing everything. Some were chopping up ingredients, some fetching and carrying, others were cleaning. No Uruk was a slave here or forced to work, but they weren’t a lazy folk, physical work was in their nature. They understood the importance of each needing to share the burden in order to get by. Neldoriel had volunteered to help scrub some dirty iron cooking pots with her now familiar Uruk escort. Despite the Uruk’s natural mistrust of Elves, Ûlfa had warmed up to her new companion and they felt comfortable around each other.

 

Adar stood at the doorway, taking in the scene in front of him, he spotted her and his heart was lightened at the sight of her, how she had settled in amongst his beloved Uruks and treated them kindly. He felt an unexpected sense of protectiveness over her, and suddenly felt guilty that she was doing these chores as if she were some sort of maid. She was above this sort of work, one as fair and pure as her should be treated as a princess, not scrubbing pots in a dirty camp. What was he thinking, treating her like this? He should release her, it was like keeping a beautiful songbird in a rusted cage. At the same time, he couldn’t bear to let her go. She had become a ray of light to him, a reminder of his heritage and his true self. His kindred, she had the look of the Elves of his homeland from long ago. He felt a deepening affection towards her that he kept hidden inside. If he released her, she would probably run for the hills and he would never see her again. 

He entered the tent, prompting several of the Uruks to bow and make way for him,  mumbling “Adar” and “Lord-Father” in hushed tones. He approached the station where Neldoriel was washing pots with Ûlfa.

He greeted Ûlfa with fatherly recognition and Ûlfa dipped her head respectfully to him, calling him Lord-Father.

“Edhel, you are not an Uruk or a servant. You are a guest here, washing pots is not required of you.” He remarked, scanning his eyes over the iron pots and then back to her.

She smiled genuinely, “It’s quite alright, I don’t mind, really. It gives me something to do and I’m happy to help the others.” 

He smiled inwardly at the sound of her voice, he was so drawn to her. 

“As you wish, I will not stop you.” Where was his manners, he thought to himself. “Thank you for your help, Brennil nîn. It is appreciated. I’m glad you have found some peace in this stark place. How have you been finding life here in the camp?”

She had to look away because she found herself blushing. Had he actually just called her his Lady? He was so well spoken and eloquent. She wondered if he had been nobility before. She pulled herself together and answered him.

“It has been an interesting experience, I have learnt a lot about the Uruks and their way of life, Ûlfa has been a wonderful companion and guide, I’m glad to have had her company.” 

Ûlfa looked at her, taken aback at this praise from an Elf. 

Adar looked at the female Uruk approvingly. “Thank you, Ûlfa for making our guest feel so welcome. I knew I could rely on you.”

“Y-you are welcome Lord-Father, glad to be of service. This Lady Elf isn’t so bad.” Ûlfa stuttered, happy to have pleased him. 

Adar gave a bemused smile. “We have plenty of clean pots, you are dismissed, child. Go and rest.” 

Ûlfa bowed gratefully and departed, speaking in Black Speech to some of the other Uruks, informing them that their work for the day was over, leaving Neldoriel and Adar all but alone, apart from a couple of Uruks that remained, quietly keeping an eye on the stew and stirring it occasionally.  His usual way would have been to give a polite farewell and leave, but instead he stayed, wanting to spend time with her. 

“So… I am a guest now and no longer a prisoner? Does that mean I can have my weapons back? Perhaps I can decorate my wonderfully dreary quarters to make it more homely? I’m sure Ûlfa would be happy to help”. Neldoriel asked him with a sense of playfulness. 

He smirked at her, with a roguish look on his face, wanting to tease her back, but the feeling soon turned to sadness and he sighed.

“I am sorry for the circumstances in which we have met and for keeping you here, it was for the safety of the Uruks, I didn’t know who you were or what your intentions were.”

“Adar… we both know that I am no threat to anybody here. I understand your reasoning though. I hope that after time, you can eventually believe me.”

Deep down, he knew this to be true. He just found it incredibly difficult to trust anyone. 

“I’ve enjoyed your company Neldoriel. I… will miss you if the time comes where you must depart.” It was an unassuming statement but one that meant a lot coming from him, he was showing vulnerability and a softer side that he never let anyone see. He looked away, almost as if regretting saying it, waiting for rejection or ridicule. 

She felt a slight aching feeling in her chest as she looked at him, this broken, dark Elf stood before her, she could see he carried so much pain. She wanted to comfort him, it was obvious that he had been starved of companionship for a long time and been through a lot, yet she could see his sweetness through it all. 

These feelings between them were unspoken, and neither of them knew how the other felt, but the way they looked at each other said it all.There was silence in the tent other than the sound of the stew quietly bubbling away.

Neldoriel opened her mouth to answer him, but just as she did, there was an almighty crash and the pot of stew had been knocked over and the Uruks attending to it began arguing with one another in Black Speech. Adar and Neldoriel swiftly went to go and help the Uruks with the spilled dinner, Adar conversing with the pair of them in their language. Apparently the Uruks had been paying more attention to listening in on their conversation than to the stew, and one of them had clumsily walked right at the pot and sent it tumbling over.

Adar calmed them both down and with everything smoothed over, Neldoriel and Adar left the tent. The moment of vulnerability had gone and Adar had his walls back up. They bid each other goodnight and each headed back to their own tents, unbeknownst to them, both thinking about the other and what could have been.

 

 

Note: Edhel means Elf in Sindarin

Brennil nîn means My Lady in Sindarin

Chapter 5: Halbrand

 

More days passed, and as always, Neldoriel was busying herself doing jobs around the camp. It was an unusual picture, an Elf and an Uruk, each sat upon a stump of chopped tree log that served as a stool, with a big pile of materials and fabrics nearby. Neldoriel was helping Ûlfa with sewing together fabrics to form the wall and roof material used to cover their tents. They mostly worked in silence, Uruks weren’t accustomed to making small talk. This suited Neldoriel as she never did really care for it anyway, but every now and then they would exchange a few words, mainly in regard to the task at hand. 

In the distance she could see that a new batch of prisoners had been captured and brought into camp. Neldoriel looked on, continuing her work as she watched from afar.

She could see Adar, seated upon a makeshift wooden throne of sorts. A figure of quiet authority supervising the processing of the prisoners, distinguishing which ones were going to yield and be of use, and which were a threat. It was a harsh thing. The prisoners were left with a choice of taking a brand and becoming a slave, or death. Neldoriel sighed, she didn’t like it, but she was powerless to do anything about it. She just hoped that one day things could change.

After watching for a while, she noticed that the next prisoner had something different about him, an air of confidence, and something else, something, unsettling. Adar must have sensed something in this particular prisoner too. She couldn’t hear what they were saying but she saw that Adar had got to his feet and words were being exchanged. The prisoner was then roughly taken away somewhere else, having received neither a brand nor death. 

Neldoriel looked back down at her work and continued sewing, a frown on her face and deep in thought.

“What do you suppose they are going to do with that one?” She asked her Uruk companion. 

Ûlfa had been paying attention more than Neldoriel had expected.

“They’ll throw him in a cell most likely. There’s an old broken house full of chains that they use to keep the more, unruly prisoners in sometimes. Maybe they’ll put him in there.”

Neldoriel nodded. She knew the building that Ûlfa had mentioned, she had walked past it once while walking around the camp with Adar.

They continued working on the fabrics for a little while longer but after a while she put down her things and rose to her feet.

“If you’ll excuse me, Ûlfa. I am going to return to my tent now.”

Ûlfa nodded in recognition. “As you wish Lady Elf.”

 

She did indeed return to her tent, to rest and to wash up after working. She wanted to know more about this prisoner though and resolved to go and find him. She left the tent and set off to go and get a closer look. After the time she had spent in the camp, she had gotten somewhat attached to its residents, she was concerned for Adar and for the Uruks at this new presence here.

She quietly approached the building, an old house that had been partially destroyed in the eruption of the volcano. She could sense that there were people inside, there was a Warg being kept in there too. She would have to be careful, she couldn’t just go wandering in there. 

She looked around her, to see if anyone was looking. The Uruks had let their guard down in constantly watching her of late, they had seen that she had made no attempt to escape and they had seen her becoming friends with their Lord-Father and Ûlfa. They had become used to her presence here and things were a bit more relaxed now.

With typically Elven agility, Neldoriel climbed up onto the roof without being seen. The roof had many holes and gaps so she was able to stay hidden from sight but also see what was going on inside. 
The prisoner was lying on his back, chained and looking up at the ceiling. She quickly shrunk back, in case he spotted her. He appeared to be sleeping, but just in case, she moved herself carefully to a spot where she could see but not be seen. He appeared to be a young human man, dirty and unkempt, but she felt in her being that there was more to this man than met the eye. 

She heard movement and saw Adar come into view. She practically held her breath as she listened in absolute silence to the conversation that took place. He spoke about he was one of thirteen ‘chosen’ to be ‘blessed’ by Morgoth. How he was chained and left on a mountain. The desperation he must have felt to reduce him to accepting what Sauron had to offer. She felt tears well up in her eyes as she realised. He was indeed a broken, fallen Elf from such a long time ago. In that moment her heart was weeping, it pained her to think of what had been done to him. 

She turned to lie on her back and look up at the dark, hazy grey sky for a moment, taking in all she had just heard. It appeared too that the prisoner was going to be released. Good, she thought, she didn’t get to find out who he was but she was glad he was going to be leaving. She had a feeling that this wasn’t going to be the last anyone saw of him, but there was nothing she could do about it. Right now, she had something else on her mind.

 

 

Chapter 6: Golden Leaves

 

She waited on the rooftop for a while until the coast was clear before she climbed back down and headed back to her tent, deep in thought.

Taking a detour on the way, she saw him, sitting in solitude upon the wooden throne. He was gazing out into the distance, lost in thought. It was as if he were listening to a distant call from somewhere far away. He looked very alone. Although he was surrounded by his Uruks, he was different to them. They were simple creatures, and wild. She knew was an Elf, despite what had happened to him. There were things that their kind held dear that he was forced to be so far removed from. How much had he sacrificed for the Uruks by living like this? Her heart was filled with sorrow for all he must have lost and all he had been through. She wanted to say or do something, but yet it felt like he was so guarded, she didn’t want to be overstepping the mark.

She approached, quietly and softly. He heard her coming and looked slightly over his shoulder back towards her.

“Adar, are you alright?” She couldn’t find any more words other than this simple question. 

“Why do you ask?” He answered in response and looked back out into the distance. 

She tentatively stepped closer so she was facing him. “I overheard the conversation you had with the prisoner. I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have been eavesdropping, it was wrong of me”. 

“Ah, then you know what I am. A Moriondor, corrupted by Morgoth. Does that not repulse you?” He asked bitterly, remembering a past conversation with a certain golden haired Elf quite some time ago.

Neldoriel looked shocked. Why would he think such a thing? “No, of course not! I’ve spent a lot of time with you and your Uruks, Adar, I would never feel that way. I care about you and just wanted to make sure you were alright, you’ve been through a lot, and talking about it can’t have been easy.”

Adar was taken by surprise. She…cared about him? He didn’t know what to say. He had only ever known rejection and distain from other Elves. But this one, she looked at him differently, with so much acceptance towards him and his Uruks. There was a connection between them in this moment and they remained in silence, eyes fixed on each other. 

The moment was broken when an Uruk came and interrupted them. He was tall and had pointy features, he wore a chain mail hood, with a worried expression on his face.

“I have news. The Warg has escaped, Lord-Father, and Waldreg has been killed. We’ve been searching to find out who did it and to get the beast back, but so far we’ve found nothing.” 

Adar rubbed his forehead with one hand and sighed. Just what he needed, one more thing to worry about. “Thank you, Glûg. Send out a search party to continue searching for the Warg.”

Glûg nodded and left.

Neldoriel spoke up. “Adar, I might be able to help you get the Warg back if you’ll let me help?”

He looked at her quizzically.

Sensing his doubts, she continued.
“I have lived almost my whole life in the wilderness, I am good at tracking. I might be able to help you find it.”

She remembered she was still technically a prisoner and he wasn’t going to agree to her going by herself, even though she could work better in silence, a noisy group of Uruks would be a hindrance for tracking.

“I could go with your Uruk search party. I work better alone but, if it helps?…”

Adar was silent for a moment, considering it. It would be dangerous, he didn’t want to put her at risk, but at the same time he didn’t want to insult her capabilities. He didn’t want to lose the Warg either if it could be helped, they were useful to him. 

“Very well, but I will go with you for protection, it isn’t safe.”

Neldoriel hid a smile. Was this hardened leader of the Uruks showing concern for her? “I can handle myself well enough, but the company and the protection is welcome, thank you, Adar.” 

He nodded and continued to look at her intently. There was a lot going on beneath the sparkling blue surface of his eyes. What he was thinking, she could only guess. 

She smiled and tucked a strand of hair behind her ear, looking away. He really was very handsome, despite his scars. It saddened her that he thought she should be repulsed by him.

“We should probably get started straight away, the longer we wait, the further away the Warg will get.” Neldoriel suggested. “If we start at the point where it was being kept, I should be able to track it from there.” 

They returned to the jail building where the prisoner and the Warg had been held captive. She examined the area, and inspected the chains that had been holding the animal.

“This Warg didn’t escape, it was freed from its chains. I don’t think this was an Uruk, or one of the captive villagers, I think this is the work of your prisoner, I have an ill feeling about that one. Something about him just seemed off.’”

Adar simply nodded in agreement, he was impressed by her insight. 

She motioned to some claw marks on the floor that led out of the building and out through the camp. “I have a trail, we should get moving.” 

 

The Uruk search party had already left and gone out into the wasteland of Mordor. Neldoriel and Adar followed the Warg tracks out of the camp and into the grey, dusty wilderness. It was a grim landscape, mostly devoid of life, save for the occasional scavenging bird or withered and dying tree. The once beautiful Southlands, it was sad to see what they had become. She stole a glance at Adar. He had a resigned look on his face, it had pained him to do this, but he didn’t regret it. He had done it for his children, created a place for them to live in safety from the sun and away from those that despised them.

They carried on following the trail for some time, stopping every now and then to examine the ground. It couldn’t be much further. 

Up a little further ahead they saw a pair of Uruks coming towards them, one appeared to be injured. The Uruks saw Adar and hurried toward him. Adar went to them, full of concern.

“What happened?” He asked the uninjured Uruk.

“The Warg, Lord-Father, we are all that’s left of the search party. It got most of us.” The Uruk replied with a strained voice.

Adar put a hand compassionately on the Uruk’s shoulder. “You fought well, my sons. Now tell me, which way did it go?” 

“It was headed that way” the Uruk answered and pointed up towards a hilly area in the distance. 

Adar patted the Uruk on the shoulder gently and in Black Speech, told them to hurry back to camp.

“Neldoriel, perhaps you should return too. It is unusual for the Wargs to attack our own like this, it is too dangerous.”

The look on her face said it all, she wasn’t going anywhere. He cursed himself for not letting her have her weapons back by now. He knew deep down she was no threat, but it was only out of care for his Uruks that had first caused him to be wary. 

Along with his Greatsword, he also carried a matching dagger. He took it from his belt and gave it to her. “Here, take it.”

She took the dagger carefully. This gesture meant a lot. It was a sign of trust for a start, he was trusting her to not try and knife him the minute his back was turned, and also this was his own personal dagger. Her heart swelled slightly at this.

“Hannon le”. She thanked him quietly. Giving him a half smile, she nodded. “The tracks lead up there”. 

“We must be careful. This Warg may have gone completely savage.” Adar warned her.

He had such a powerful and majestic presence. This was one who had seen many things in his time and fought many enemies. Neldoriel nodded in understanding, respectful and in admiration of how experienced she knew he was. She felt completely safe with him there. 

Together they started up the slope, the ground beneath their feet uneven and rugged as the barren, flat landscape gave way to hills and ridges. Halfway up the ravine they came to a flat and open area that seemed out of place in this ruined land. An unusual sight, it was a golden brown area of grass, dry and parched. A few surviving trees standing defiantly despite the toxic atmosphere of Mordor. Rocky outcrops and rock formations of varying heights and small cliffs lined the edges of the clearing. it even looked like there could be rabbit burrows up here.

Neldoriel looked around for signs of the Warg, they made their way to the entrance of a little cave in amongst the rock formations. As they got closer, a low growling could be heard and they stopped in their tracks. Adar drew his sword defensively.

A pair of eyes flashed at them in the dark and the growling escalated into snarling. The Warg came into view and was ferociously guarding the entrance to the cave. Adar readied his sword, but Neldoriel had noticed something.

“Wait” she said softly.

She peered further into the cave and could see some smaller bundles of fur wiggling around inside. The Warg had stopped its snarling and stood silently and warily.

“Shhhhh, îdh….îdh….” She spoke softly to the Warg.
The animal seemed to calm down slightly and Neldoriel slowly backed away, she wasn’t silly enough to try and get any closer.

She had a stale old piece of Lembas bread in her pocket which she threw over to the Warg, it sniffed it and cocked its head to one side. It didn’t know what to make of the strange food but Neldoriel’s offering reassured it that she meant no harm. 

Neldoriel walked back over to Adar.

“She has pups. She was just frightened and desperate to get back to them. I think if we leave her in peace then nobody else will come to any harm.”

Adar withdrew his sword and watched Neldoriel in silence, taken aback by what had happened. They retreated back and left the warg in peace with her puppies. 

 

They had come this far, Neldoriel wanted to see more of this curiosity so they made the climb up through a narrow rocky pass to the summit of this strange and peaceful place. Before long they reached the top and they were met with a vast expanse of more of the dry grassland that they had seen further down the ravine, a gentle breeze rippled through the air making the sea of golden grass whisper quietly. The sky was grey with moody clouds and the atmosphere of Mordor, yet rays of soft sunlight were breaking through, it was as if nature itself was showing its will to survive. 

Like a golden sentinel in the middle of the field there was an huge oak tree, its leaves seemed to glow in autumnal hues, ancient and steadfast. It took her back to the time she first traveled to Lindon and saw the Great Tree for the first time.

It had been a long and exhausting hike and the tree was a perfect place to rest. The camp could be seen in the far distance. The Uruks would be fine, Adar knew that Glûg would be keeping order in his absence. They settled down among the fallen leaves under the oak tree and gazed out over the scenery in front of them. There was nothing here, no distractions, just tranquility and a moment of respite from the noisy, muddy camp.

Adar’s thoughts turned to the red haired Elf sitting next to him. How her quiet presence had calmed the Warg and the wisdom she had shown. And how much she cared about him and his Uruks. It touched his heart, she was bringing something into his life that he didn’t think was possible. 

“So, we didn’t get your Warg back.”

He was brought out of his thoughts at the sound of her voice.

“Maybe when her pups are a little older, she might be calmer. We could tame them too and you might end up with more Wargs than you had in the first place” Neldoriel said cheerfully. 

Adar was as always, quietly listening. 

“I suppose we will have to go back soon, won’t we?” She asked. 

Adar didn’t answer, and just sat quietly, thinking. 

A soft ray of sunlight was gently breaking through the hazy atmosphere and occasionally a golden leaf fell from the oak tree and fluttered down to the ground around them. He actually wasn’t in much of a hurry to get back. He missed the sun, and he missed trees. He didn’t know when he would get to see either again. 

Neldoriel sensed his sadness. 

“Adar, it’s not much, but I’m here if you ever want to talk about it. I understand how it feels to be alone.”

 

A moment passed in silence as they sat in quiet companionship, gazing out over the peaceful landscape before them. 

“It’s been so many years.” His voice was quiet and he had a faraway look on his face. She looked at him, silently and supportively listening.

“I was an Elf once, like you. I am no longer, instead I am now Uruk. Dark forces led me down this path.” 

“The path of Morgoth”. she replied sadly. “Why?”

He closed his eyes for a moment. Not for an age had he had a deep conversation like this, and never had anyone taken such an interest in him or appeared to care like this sweet Elf woman sat beside him. They had developed an understanding, and trust, since she first came to the camp.

“I was young and foolish. He made promises to me, but what I received was not what I expected.  I was tricked and tortured, and he made me what you see before you. When I was left on the mountain, broken in both body and mind, Sauron came to me and offered me that wine, there was no going back. A choice to drink it and be forever changed and corrupted, or die.” He added darkly, “Sometimes I wonder, should have chosen death? But then what of the Uruks?”

Neldoriel’s heart broke for him, her eyes filled with tears but she held them back.  She wanted to be strong and supportive. After all he had been through he didn’t care about himself anymore, he was simply there for the Uruks.

“Adar, I’m so sorry.”

He continued. “Sometimes I think of what was, and what might have been. Never again will I be accepted by the Elves or welcome in their realms. The golden leaves of the Great Tree forever out of reach.”

She wanted to help him, she wondered if there was a chance he could be accepted and forgiven by the Elves. If there was a chance, she would help him. 

He seemed to sense what she was thinking.

“What was done to me cannot be undone. I am a new and ruined form of life.”

He again thought back to words he had been told not so long ago and his eyes shined with so many years of hidden feelings coming to the surface. Sadness and bitterness for all that had been taken from him. He began to retreat back into himself. 

“Maybe things can change, Adar. It’s never too late.”

Her words snapped him out of it and he looked at her intensely, so many feelings were held under the surface. 

The way he looked at her, it gave her a fluttering feeling in her stomach. His eyes were still fixed on her as she spoke, slightly nervously.

“Adar… the light of the Eldar is within you. I can feel it. You have the soul of an Elf still, and that can’t be taken from you, no matter what.”

For a moment he felt a glimmer of hope, but it was fleeting. He put up his walls again and looked on darkly, he wished it were true but to him, he was too far gone, too ruined by darkness, he would never be accepted into Valinor.

“I do not know. But thank you. You have brought some light into my otherwise dark existence, if only for a little while.”

She knew that this conversation had been painful for him. She also knew that the conversation was over, and that is all he was willing to share for now. Thank you for trusting me with this Adar, I really do care.” Tentatively, not knowing if he would accept her touch, she softly placed her hand upon his, looking into his eyes. 

He looked at her, really taking her in. She was beautiful, he had thought so from the moment he met her. The way she looked at him with such sincerity and affection, it filled his empty heart that had been for so long starved of love. He cared for her too, and despite himself, he was developing feelings for her. He had always been so guarded, it was his way of surviving. But this woman, she had come into his life as a fateful accident and it was changing everything. He took her hand gently in return. They said no more as the golden light from the sun broke through the cloud, creating a warm glow around them. There was nothing to be heard except the sound of the wind. It whipped through the grass creating a soft sound and making the great oak tree sway gently, leaves from its branches falling down around the two of them. 

It was so peaceful here, a haven of hope and defiance in a land where all seemed lost. Adar closed his eyes and leant back against the vast trunk of the tree, still holding her hand. They soon had to get back, but for now they would stay here, just for a little while longer. 

 

Notes:

Hannon le is a neo-sindarin phrase meaning thank you 

Îdh means peace In sindarin 

 

Chapter 7: To Eregion

 

A few days had passed since the eventful journey to the Warg territory and the golden oak tree. Word had reached Adar that Sauron had returned and he was residing at Eregion, the great Elven city was under his sinister grasp. Wanting to rid the world of Sauron’s evil, Adar had formed an army of Uruk and was preparing to set off towards Eregion with the intention in destroying Sauron for good. 

Tents were being dismantled and packed up in preparation for their departure. Some of the Uruks; mothers with children and some warriors to defend them would stay behind. Adar, remembering Neldoriel’s plea, gave orders for the release of the Southlander prisoners. He stood with folded arms and one hand on his chin, watching in contemplation from a distance as the prisoners left, it gave him a sense of peace to see them go.

Neldoriel quietly came along to stand beside him. 

“So, you have released them.” She stated quietly. 

Without taking his eyes off the departing prisoners in the distance, he answered her.

“I have no need for them now, we will soon be leaving this place”.

It relieved her to hear this, and it warmed her heart to see how Adar had shown kindness and mercy.

“Furthermore, it was to fulfil your request, my Lady. I did not wish to bring you sadness by keeping them captive any longer.” He had turned to face her, and looked at her with a small smile on his face. She saw a gentle and pure Elven soul radiating through his expressive blue eyes in this moment. 

“It gladdens my heart to see this Adar, thank you.” She said, reaching out and touching his arm affectionately.

He nodded at her, placing his hand on top of hers, gladly accepting her touch. 

“I am glad you have shown them mercy, it is a kindness that you have done, setting them free, you do not need to fear retaliation from them. I’ve spoken with some of them, they just wish to go and start a new life somewhere safe.”

As he listened to her words, Adar was reminded of what he had to do next.

“Neldoriel, just as it was necessary to release the Southlander prisoners, the time has also come to give you your freedom back.”

He motioned to a nearby Uruk, who brought a bundle over, giving it to Neldoriel. It was her bow and her father’s sword, wrapped in rags and tied with string. She took the package and looked up at Adar, her eyes shining with emotion.

He continued, “You have shown me a hundred times over that you are no threat to my Uruks, it is wrong to drag you along into this.  I will miss your presence here, truly. But I will not keep you here any longer by my own selfishness.”

Just as she had at the great oak tree, Neldoriel took his hand, which he readily reciprocated, relishing her touch with sadness for it could be the last time he ever saw her.

“Adar, I have no desire to leave. I gratefully accept my freedom, but now that I am free to do as I please, I wish to stay with you.”

He looked at her with glistening eyes, he could scarcely believe what he was hearing.

“I feel a connection with you, Adar. Something I’ve never felt before in my life, until I met you. I would miss you dearly, and Ûlfa too”, she added with a small smile. 

“Neldoriel…” He gazed upon her intently, almost overcome with feelings, but in true form he kept his emotions in check. He reached his hand to her face, cradling her soft skin gently. She closed her eyes contentedly and brought her own hand up to meet his. 

“You could leave, you could go anywhere in this beautiful and vast world, yet you choose to stay here, with me?”

Even speaking these words seemed incredulous to him. She simply nodded, she too was filled with emotion, and had grown to care for him so much.

“I will not stop you or send you away. You wouldn’t listen even if I did”. He added with a smirk. “But, you do know what this pursuit entails?”

“Yes, I understand. He must be stopped, I could sense a malicious presence when he was here. That prisoner, he was Sauron, wasn’t he? But we did not yet realise. And now he is In Eregion, who knows what evil he is concocting there.”

She was worried for her fellow Elves and the land she had called her home for many years. She too did not wish to sit by and do nothing, but she also didn’t want violence. Hoping there would be a way to subdue Sauron without having to go to war, she set off with Adar and the travelling Uruk camp on the journey to Eregion. 

 

***

 

Days passed and the travelling camp moved under cover of darkness, once they had left the smog of Mordor, the Uruk were once again vulnerable to the light from the sun. It was a gruelling journey, with not many stops. Finally they arrived in the land of Eregion, and the Uruks began work on making a base and setting up the camp. It was bittersweet for Neldoriel being back in these lands. 

The camp was set up in a similar way to how it was in Mordor. It was near woodland and in addition, they had turned the area into a large trench and set up the camp from within, to help shield the Uruk from the suns rays.

These days, Neldoriel’s tent was more than just the ‘guest quarters’. She had made it her own with things that had been lying around the camp that the Uruks had ‘acquired’ over time. Books, trinkets, and nicer furnishings, soft blankets. She was still hoping for a nice rug for the floor. Her own tent was nearer to Adar’s this time, she didn’t know if this was intentional or not. Thinking about it for too long made her giggle to herself and blush. 

Adar was often busy planning tactics and talking with his Uruk commanders, so she didn’t get to spend as much time with him as she would have liked. She understood, he was busy and had important things to attend to. She missed him though when he wasn’t there and was always glad of it when they were able to spend time together. Tonight was one such brief opportunity. 

Adar was preparing to leave with a small party of Uruks to go and scout the area. She wanted to go and see him before he left so she decided to go and pay him a visit at his tent before he departed.

She stepped inside the entrance to the tent and knocked on the nearest wooden beam politely. Adar saw her come in and immediately came to meet her.

“Good evening my Lady, it is a pleasure as always to see you. Sadly I don’t have long, we are about to depart.”

“I know, I won’t keep you, I just wanted to come and see you before you left, and to give you this.”

From underneath her cloak she pulled out Adar’s dagger that he had lent her a few weeks ago.

“I thought you might need this while you are out there, I have my own things back now so it’s time I gave you this back. I’m so grateful that you trusted me with it though, thank you Adar. It’s a beautiful dagger, along with your sword. I’d love to know about the history of them one day.”

He tenderly took the dagger back from her, gently brushing her hand with the softest touch. “One day, I will tell you all about it.”

Neldoriel smiled at him. “I would like that.” She looked at the ground shyly. The way he looked at her with those piercing eyes never failed to overwhelm her with a growing desire that was getting stronger with each passing day. 

Slowly and elegantly he stepped in closer to her, so close that she could hear his ever so slightly elevated breathing and feel his warm breath on her skin as he looked down at her with smouldering eyes. She gazed back at him, her heart pounding in her chest.

“Boe menin.” His voice was a gravelly yet silken whisper. “I will return soon.”

“Namárië, Adar.” She breathed, barely able to form words.

They lingered in each other’s gaze for a moment longer, and with a small smile, Adar left the tent. Neldoriel turned and watched him leave, her heart longing for him.

 

Notes:

Boe menin means ‘I must go’ in Sindarin

Namárie is the Quenya word for ‘farewell’

 

Chapter 8: A Dinner fit for an Uruk

 

Neldoriel looked up from a book that she had been reading in her tent, she could hear a commotion outside. Taking a peek out the door, a number of the Uruks had gathered and were agitated. She soon discovered the source of the Uruks unrest, Adar was being held at knifepoint by a female Elf. Neldoriel felt fury rise up within her, she rushed back inside her tent where her bow was hanging on the back of a wooden chair. Silently she aimed her bow, right at the head of the head of this golden haired huil. She could shoot a deer in the heart from over a hundred feet away, she wouldn’t miss her target. She was ready to loose her arrow when a hand came down upon her arm to stop her. Neldoriel’s looked around angrily at her saboteur, it was Ûlfa.

“Lady Elf, don’t be hasty, Adar has everything under control, look.”

Neldoriel looked back in the direction of Adar and indeed, the female Elf had dropped the knife and was now being led away by a couple of Uruks. Neldoriel breathed a sigh of relief and turned to Ûlfa.

“I thought she was going to kill him. Forgive me Ûlfa, it seems you have better judgment than me.” 

“Don’t be sorry. You so fiercely defend our Lord Father, we are lucky to have you and so is he. But he knew what he was doing, he had told Glûg to stand down, he had a plan and didn’t want us interfering.” 

“I should have known, I couldn’t help but panic I suppose.” She took a breath, processing everything.

She hadn’t got a good look at her face, only the back of her head, but there was only one Elf that she knew of with such hair.

“I wonder, is it who I think it is? And what is she doing here?” Neldoriel pondered.

“She was captured in the forest while she was out there killing our brothers.” Replied Ûlfa.

Neldoriel frowned. It wasn’t her place to get involved, but she had to go and take a look at who this was and see if her suspicions were correct. 

She and Ûlfa quietly made their way over to where the Elf was being held, outside under a tarp, her wrist shackled to a wooden pole. Neldoriel kept hidden behind some sheets, not wanting to be detected. They kept their distance but were close enough to get a good look. Neldoriel’s thoughts were correct, it was the Lady Galadriel. She had seen her once in passing during one of her visits to Lindon.

“It is her, Galadriel, just as I thought. I wonder what Adar means to do with her?” Neldoriel whispered to Ûlfa. 

A voice from behind startled them both. It was Glûg.

“Ûlfa, there you are. Our Father wants a dinner prepared in his quarters for the guest.” He eyed the pair of them suspiciously, wondering what they were up to. “Get to it.” 

“As our Lord-Father wishes.” Ûlfa replied with a hint of venom in her voice.

Glûg grunted and walked off and Ûlfa grumbled to herself quietly in Black Speech. Neldoriel had spent enough time around Uruks to have picked up some of their language. She recognised some of the phrases as being derogatory and it was clear that Ûlfa didn’t like Glûg very much. Neldoriel was also feeling a bit agitated, why was Galadriel being brought to his personal tent and being served dinner? She was surprising herself at how much this was irritating her. A thought came to her.

“Ûlfa, I will help you.” The Uruk nodded and they both headed to the food preparation tent.

 

***

 

The Uruk cooks had been busy, inside the ‘kitchen tent’ there was a constant supply of food being cooked, feeding a legion required a large amount of food. The Uruk couldn’t afford to be fussy, they had to take what they could get, anything they found on their travels that looked edible was fair game. Before them was a vast array of food items for them to choose from to use for the banquet. Various types of cooked meats, some were ordinary; pheasant, chicken, rabbit and so on. And also some rather unpleasant looking things, there were strange things that looked like large clams in shells, squids (she dread to think where they had come from) rats with crispy skins and all manner of strange foods.

They began to pick things out for the table and place them into containers to take over to the dinner table in Adar’s tent.

“Ûlfa, we must make sure we show our guest proper courtesy, and give her a taste of the Uruk way of life, you never know, she might like it.”

Ûlfa looked at her companion with a wicked grin and together they set to work gathering different items for the table. Between them, they laid out an interesting spread, making sure it wasn’t all horrible items. After all, Neldoriel wanted to make sure there were nice things there for Adar, she added grapes and raspberries and made sure they were closer to his side of the table.

“Ûlfa, pass me one of those rats, no not that one, the nice big juicy one. Thank you. She can have a few raspberries as well I suppose, let’s not be too cruel.” She continued to add a couple more things to Galadriel’s plate, finishing with a raw onion.

“There. All done.” She stood back and surveyed the table, it looked good.

It was a grand looking banquet, with a touch of Uruk about it.

Galadriel needs to learn more about the Uruk and see that they aren’t the monsters she thinks they are, Neldoriel thought to herself. 

“Do you think we’ve done enough to horrify her, Ûlfa?” Neldoriel asked, giggling to herself. 

“Elves don’t have the stomach for our food, she will be disgusted.” Ûlfa replied with an evil grin.

“I’d love to see the look on her face when she is presented with this food.” Neldoriel sniggered. Their work here was done, so she and Ûlfa retreated back to the kitchen. 

 

She planned to go back to her tent but she couldn’t help herself, she wanted to see what was going to happen at this dinner, and the look on Galadriel’s face at what she was being served. She knew it was childish, but she couldn’t help it. Taking a spare cloak used by the Uruks to shield themselves from the sun, she headed to Adar’s tent. Sneaking around the back, she slipped in through a loose sheet of fabric. Pulling the hood of the cloak up over her head, hoping she would only give off the smell and presence of an Uruk, she hid silently in the background and waited. 

After a while, Adar entered the tent. Neldoriel held her breath, this was stupid, what if he sensed her presence here? Shrinking back even further, she hoped and prayed that the stench of the dirty old Uruk cloak was enough to disguise her.

From her hiding place in she shadows she gazed at him, taking in how truly beautiful he was, his presence, he had such a quiet nobility about him, but he also exuded strength and the ethereal grace of one who had walked Middle Earth for thousands of years. His dark hair cascading down over his shoulders and lightly brushing over his ancient and beautiful armour as he monotonously rolled a raspberry around on his plate with one finger. She smiled to herself, he liked the raspberries. For a moment she felt like throwing off the cloak and going to him but she knew she couldn’t. 

Almost as if her thoughts were so loud he could hear them, Adar looked up from the raspberry. Was she going to be discovered? Not a moment too soon, there was noise at the entrance to Adar’s tent and Galadriel was frog marched in by a pair of Uruks and brought to a chair at the end of a table, on the opposite side to Adar. Neldoriel breathed a silent sigh of relief at not being discovered. 

She studied Galadriel, this was the closest she had ever been to her before, she had seen her once in passing in Lindon but that was all. The tales of her beauty were justified, she was indeed a very beautiful Elf, her golden hair shone like the sun and her perfect face radiated with beauty.

Neldoriel smirked as she watched her, an Uruk unceremoniously dumped the plate of food under Galadriel’s nose, complete with a crispy rat and smelly onion. Galadriel wrinkled her nose, looking with distaste at the weird food. The expression on her face was like a Warg that had been chewing on a hornet.

How ungrateful, she has raspberries and everything, at least show a little gratitude, Neldoriel thought to herself wickedly. She was pleased that the plan had succeeded, she couldn’t wait to tell Ûlfa later.

From the shadows she watched them, seeing Adar looking at Galadriel with that calculating and dark gaze of his, and talking with her. And then she saw him take Galadriel’s hand and gently put a shackle on her. She felt a tight knot form in her stomach. It was killing her watching him in close contact with her in this way. Why was this affecting her so badly? It was irrational.

But then the realisation finally hit her, she had fallen in love with him. A small spark that had been ignited when they had first met and spread like a wildfire in her heart. 

She felt afraid. What if he liked her? This was Lady Galadriel, the most beautiful and powerful Elf there was, royalty and a warrior. Next to her I am nobody, a stray from the woods. I’m no one special, why would he be interested in me? Her thoughts were running wild. Turning away and leaning back against the wooden beam, she felt tears welling up in her eyes as so many emotions ran through her head. She needed to get out of here before she gave herself away with her less than composed breathing. 

Adar had already left, and Neldoriel turned to sneak out the way she had come in. 

“Who is there?” Galadriel called out quietly.

Neldoriel panicked slightly, not wanting to be revealed. Saying nothing, she silently slid under the flap of the tent and left.

 

She didn’t know what to do, Adar had just left, maybe she should go and try to catch up with him. No, she couldn’t do that, she would end up making a fool of herself, she thought. Instead she just wandered aimlessly, not really caring where she was going. Eventually she came to a tent that was used for storage. She went inside and sat down upon a wooden box, putting her head in her hands.

Hearing the sound of shuffling feet, Neldoriel looked up, it was Ûlfa. Of course it was. Dumping an armful of wooden poles into a pile in the corner, Ûlfa noticed her Elf friend.

“Neldoriel, what are you doing here?” She asked.

“I don’t really know Ûlfa, I’m rather a mess at the moment.”

Neldoriel didn’t know what came over her, but she confessed everything to Ûlfa about her feelings. Ûlfa listened quietly, she was an Uruk and as such, her replies were always short and to the point. She was a good listener though and Neldoriel was grateful to have someone to talk to. 

“He doesn’t want her, she murders our kind and has always been cruel to him.” Ûlfa said with a growl. “We’ve seen how he looks at you, all of us Uruk have noticed it. He cares for you, you showed him, and all of us love when nobody else did.”

Neldoriel could have cried. “Thank you Ûlfa. I’ve been so foolish. Thank you for helping me realise it. You are a good friend, like a sister in fact. My Uruk sister.” She said with a smile.

“Sister?” Ûlfa said to herself quietly, fascinated by this term of endearment. 

Neldoriel got up and started to leave. “I need to go and see him. Thank you again, Ûlfa.”

Without thinking, she turned around and gave Ûlfa a hug. The Uruk was surprised by this and received the embrace with some confusion. 

As Neldoriel was leaving, Ûlfa had turned her attention to the poles she had dumped on the ground earlier, trying to organise them better.

“Goodbye, Sister.” She replied quietly as she busied herself with her work.

 

 

 

Notes:

Huil means ‘bitch’ or ‘female dog’ in sindarin

 

Chapter 9: Riding Out

 

She wanted an excuse to go and talk to him, even if only briefly, and she had thought of the perfect reason. It didn’t take her long to find him, she spotted him a little way across the camp, and did a half jog to catch up to him.

“Adar” she called to him softly.

“Neldoriel, Oio naa elealla alasse. How may I help you?” He replied, unable to disguise the smile on his face as he noticed her coming.

She blushed but kept herself composed. He spoke Quenya so beautifully and eloquently in that low and soft husky voice of his, she could listen to him speak all day.

“Well, I’ve been thinking, I miss my horse, I left him back at the grasslands before I came here, it’s been a very long time and he will be worrying and waiting for me. I’d like to go and get him. I’ll be alright, it’s quite far away but it’s nothing I haven’t done before. I’ll come back, I promise.”

Adar thought about it for a moment. He didn’t like the idea of her going so far away but she was free to do as she liked, she was longer his prisoner and he never wanted her to feel that way again. 

“If you are sure you will be safe? I could send a few Uruk to accompany you.” He couldn’t help but be concerned about her.

“Thank you Adar, I will be fine, I’m used to being on my own.” She was grateful for his concern but she didn’t want to be a bother.

As she set off, he watched her go, and his heart ached as she walked away.

 

She left the camp and started heading the way she needed to go. This was going to be a long journey on foot, it was a long walk through woodlands before she would get to the grasslands. There was a thick mist in the air that made that atmosphere in the woods feel closed in. She had barely been walking for ten minutes when she heard something coming up the trail from behind her, it sounded like hooves.

She put her hand on the hilt of her sword, expecting trouble. Out of the mist she saw two figures approaching, it was two horses, one was being led and the other was being ridden. It was Adar. She was so happy to see him, as she approached he got down from the horse and went to meet her.

“Mara amaurëa, Adar.” She greeted him with affection in her voice. “I’m so glad to see you but, you have so many responsibilities at the camp, I can’t expect you to come with me.”

“They will manage without me for a day or two. I trust Glûg to keep everything in order in my absence.”

Neldoriel thought back to Ûlfa’s dislike of Glûg, but she trusted Adar’s judgment. 

“That’s sweet of you Adar, thank you, I’m glad you are here, truly. As long as isn’t causing you trouble?”

“Nothing is too much trouble for you my Lady.”

They both looked away from each other, slightly awkwardly. He cleared his throat, changing the subject and getting back to the task at hand.

“Do you know exactly where your horse is?” He asked her.

“Not exactly, but if I go to the area I left him, we will soon find each other.”

They each mounted the horses that Adar had brought from the camp and started on their way, plodding along through the misty landscape. The journey was much quicker on horseback than if they had gone on foot. 

 

They eventually reached the grasslands, the scenery gradually changing from misty woodlands to green open plains. The skies turning from grey to blue, birds could be heard singing in the distance and there was a gentle breeze rippling through the long bright green grass in front of them, making a beautiful soft sound. Neldoriel closed her eyes and drew in a long breath, it felt good to get away from the brown and muddy camp for a while and be out in nature on the back of a horse. She had missed this.

Something came over her and she suddenly felt free, full of life and energy. Her Elvish spirit was leaping for joy at being back in nature, out in the open like this on horseback, the wind whistling through the grass. She wanted to go and let off some steam.

She trotted back towards Adar and rode a little circle around him, a mischievous smile on her face. He looked at her with a serious expression.

“I bet you can’t beat me there”.

And with that she spun the brown horse she was riding around in the opposite direction and set off at a canter across the grassy plain. 

Adar didn’t move for a moment, surprised by her sudden action, and but quickly spurred his horse straight into a gallop to catch up to her.

Neldoriel raced across the plains, the wind whipping through her hair. This was freedom. She looked back over her shoulder and saw him a short way behind, he looked cross with her. She giggled to herself and encouraged the horse to go on faster. This was fun, she wanted Adar to have fun too, he needed it. The chase continued on through the seemingly endless sea of green. 

Adar soon caught up with her, he was an excellent rider, of course he was, he had so many years of experience. She thought he was going to grab the reins or get in her way to bring her to a halt, but instead he rode alongside her, meeting each other’s gaze.

“Noro.” He whispered to his horse, it snorted and shook its head, picking up its pace, and he overtook her while giving her a smirk.

Neldoriel grinned and raced on after him at a full gallop. She was also a gifted rider and soon found herself back at his side, their paces matching perfectly.

“Having fun?” She called over to him.

“Hmph.” Was his reply. He pretended he wasn’t, but despite himself, he couldn’t help but find joy in this moment, a temporary escape from all the heaviness of his life.

 

The afternoon sun was high in the sky as they continued to ride together across the grasslands, no longer at a racing gallop, instead they maintained a more harmonious canter together. She smiled at him, a genuine smile from the bottom of her heart. It stirred feelings in him that he thought no longer possible. Nobody had ever looked at him like that before. He was taken aback at what was happening, here he was with this beautiful young Elven woman, riding over the hills seemingly without a care in the world. For a moment it was almost as if he was an Elf again. He watched her as she rode gracefully and skilfully, her flaming red hair billowing out in the wind behind her. 

There was a whinny in the distance and a grey horse came into view at the crest of a small hill. Neldoriel’s heart soared as she recognised her beloved horse. He came down to them and they all ran together as one. For a little while longer they rode on, she didn’t want this beautiful moment to end.

They reached the edge of the forest, finally slowing and coming to a stop under the trees. Neldoriel hopped down from her temporary horse and immediately went to Thalion and greeted him affectionately. He nickered at her in return, overjoyed to be reunited with his mistress. 

Adar got down off of his horse too and slowly walked over, watching on quietly. In the First Age, back in the days when he was still a pure Elf, he had enjoyed horses. He had seen horses like this before, the Noldor had brought them to Middle-Earth from Aman. This was most certainly a descendant of that ancient race. He approached the majestic dapple grey horse and reached out his hand that wasn’t wearing the gauntlet. Thalion sniffed his hand, and accepted Adars touch. Adar quietly touched his hand to the horse’s forehead and stroked it softly.

Neldoriel felt quite emotional as she watched on, both at her beloved horse’s reaction to Adar and at the serene and natural way in which he interacted with Thalion. There was so much more to him that met the eye. Here in the shade of the forest, soft rays of sunlight filtering down through the trees, she knew that deep within him there was always a sweet and gentle Elven spirit. 

“How did you come to acquire such an animal?” He asked softly. 

“Where I grew up, there is a herd that has lived there for generations, as a child I would go with my parents to spend time with the horses, we had their trust. We were blessed with being allowed to ride them. They aren’t common horses you see, each one lives for a hundred or so years. This is Thalion, I had another before him, and after him, I will return to their homeland and another will come in his place to be my companion.”

Adar nodded in understanding. “Thalion. It is a name well suited to him. And what of you Neldoriel, I’d like to know more about you and where you came from. You mention your family, where are they now?”

It was a subject that pained her to talk about. She looked away, petting Thalion gently on the neck as if to soothe her own feelings. 

“They were among some of the first Noldor that came to Middle Earth. They were good people, humble. My father was a soldier but he didn’t take pleasure from fighting, he just followed orders. Really, they just wanted a simple and peaceful life.”

Adar nodded knowingly and she continued.

“Eventually they fled from it all and started a family in a little cabin in the woods. We had a sweet and simple life. It didn’t last though, they… are no longer here. My father, his name was Tasaron, he had dark hair like yours, but his was straight, it didn’t have a wave in it like yours does….” She blushed profusely at how she had started talking about Adar’s hair.

Clearing her throat, and hoping not to embarrass herself further, she continued. “He was killed when I was just a little girl, this sword is all I have left of him. My mother, Narwen, she tried so hard for so many years but in the end, the grief consumed her. She sailed to the Undying Lands many years ago.”

Adar felt shame and guilt for allowing her father’s sword be taken from her, he knew all too well how it felt to be sentimental about such things.

“I am sorry Neldoriel. Why did you remain here? Why not sail to Valinor with your mother?”

“I do not know. There was so much of this world I still wanted to see, and something else, I just always felt there was a reason to stay here, though I have never understood why. If I had sailed with her, I may have been forever wondering, and doubting. And, as the Valar would have it, I would also have never have met you Adar.” 

Those words stirred something in him and his eyes connected with hers intently.

She smiled sadly, she was indeed so glad she had met Adar, it felt like it was meant to be. But she had been reminded of how lonely she had been for all these years, and how much she missed her parents. Her fathers death and her mother’s subsequent grief had a great impact on her as a young girl, she had carried a lot of sadness around with her for many years. She hid it well most of the time, but sometimes the feelings would come to the surface, and this was such a time. Years of loneliness came to the surface and a tear slid down her cheek as she held back silent sobs.

Adar’s heart was softened. He drew nearer to her, closing the distance between them as he held her face and brushed away her tear with his thumb.

“Nainan tyen”, he murmured quietly.

In her moment of vulnerability she didn’t question it, she didn’t think, instead she leaned into his touch and closed her eyes. He understood her, her loneliness, her loss. How it felt to have no one that truly cared.

She opened her dark blue-grey eyes and looked up at him, her eyes searching his. He returned her gaze with intensity and a shared sadness. Still holding her face in his hand, unable to hold back any longer, he leaned in and kissed her, sweetly and gently. Her heart fluttered in her chest as she wrapped her arms around his neck and kissed him back with all of her soul. He was all that mattered, the only one. She reached out her hand and caressed his beautiful scarred face. He inhaled sharply, worried that she would be repelled by the feel of his disfigured face. Reassuring him with her touch, she showed him all the acceptance and love that he so desperately needed.
Realising she wasn’t going to reject him, he relaxed again and there under the pine trees as the sunlight filtered down around them, they held each other, kissing softly and urgently. It was as if their souls were now joining as one after crying out for so long to be together. After a while they pulled apart, both slightly breathless.

“Natyë valimelda” he whispered softly while gently caressing the side of her face.

She gazed into his eyes with adoration and they shared another small sweet kiss. There was no hiding any more how they felt about each other.

 

They walked together through the forest and she told him more about her parents and her life growing up. Eventually they stopped and sat down together at the edge of the tree line of the forest, looking out over the hills of the grasslands. The sun was now setting, the sky painted with soft pastel orange and purples. They sat close together in quiet companionship. She felt so comforted by his presence and she rested against his shoulder, her face leaning into his dark silky hair which had a warm red tint to it in the soft glow of the setting sun. He said nothing but cherished this tender moment. He had been alone for so many years, and had lost all hope of having anything like this. 

They sat together for a long time, talking until night had fallen and the sky was dotted with stars. Neldoriel had fallen asleep leaning against him. He slowly and quietly moved so as not to wake her, and put his arm around her and held her as she slept. Closing his eyes, he rested, processing all that had happened. This was so new to him, being shown love after only ever knowing pain and loneliness. After a while he too drifted off to sleep, wishing this night would never end. 

 

 

 

Notes:

 

Oio naa elealla alasse translates to “ever is thy sight a joy” in Quenya 

 

Mara amaurëa translates to good morning in Quenya 

 

Noro means ‘run’ in Sindarin

 

Nainan tyen means I lament for you in Quenya 

 

Natyë valimelda translates to ‘you are beautiful and beloved’ in Quenya 

 

Thalion means ‘strong, dauntless, steadfast’ in Sindarin 

 

 

Chapter 10: Sunrise

 

The sun began to rise over the forest, a layer of dew covering the ground as the birds were beginning to sing their morning song. 

Adar had awoken first, and he looked out over the grasslands from their resting place against a big pine tree at the edge of the forest. He watched Thalion and the other horses grazing peacefully on the grass a short distance away as he savoured the last few moments of this before it had to come to an end. They would have to return to camp, he had responsibilities to get back to.

He sighed and glanced down at the red haired Elf still sleeping peacefully beside him. Gently he stroked her soft hair and kissed the top of her head sweetly. Alone with his thoughts, his eyes filled with tears as he contemplated in disbelief all that had happened the previous day. He was overwhelmed with emotion at how he had finally been able to show her how he felt and that she felt the same way back about him, he couldn’t believe it. 

Swiftly wiping away a stray tear, his thoughts then fell back to a place of darkness, he felt he was unworthy of her affections. He was tainted, broken, there was no hope of things ever being anything different, his corruption was forever and she deserved better. Someone who could offer her everything that he could not. He continued to dwell on these thoughts until she began to stir next to him. 

“Good morning Adar.” Said Neldoriel, looking up at him sleepily.

Hearing her say his name made his spirit sing for joy, pushing the dark thoughts away for now.

“Good morning Neldoriel, did you sleep well?”

“It was the best sleep I’ve had in a long time” she replied, blushing slightly. “Oh, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to fall asleep on you all night, I hope I didn’t keep you awake.”

“It is no trouble at all Híril nin. Likewise, I do not remember the last time I slept so well.”

It was true. His nights were often restless, tormented with bad dreams and memories from his past. But that night he had slept soundly and peacefully all through the night.

“It pains me to say this, but we must depart from here. I must get back to the Uruks.”

“She smiled sadly. “Of course. I understand. I’m so glad you came with me though”.

“Regarding yesterday, I hope you didn’t…that I…” he started, full of self doubt.

Sensing that he was struggling with his feelings, she gently stopped him, not needing him to explain.

“Shhhh…” she whispered softly, her fingers lightly tracing his lips. “Yesterday was wonderful.”

He gazed at her longingly while gently playing with a lock of her hair.

“It was the sweetest day of my existence” he murmured almost inaudibly. With a sigh, he reluctantly rose to his feet. “Come, we must leave.” 

She compliantly got up, lightly and affectionately touching his forearm as she walked past him to head to the horses.

Thalion saw her coming and looked up from the grass he was eating, nodding his head repeatedly and neighing in greeting to her. She was so glad to have her beloved horse back. Together she and Adar mounted the horses and set off back in the direction of the camp, at a notably slower pace than on the way here, the spare horse ambling along obediently beside them. 

 

As they rode at a walking pace, Neldoriel rummaged around in the saddlebags that Thalion carried. She was relieved to finally have all her belongings back, all her clothing and personal items. She found what she was looking for and came up alongside Adar. 

“Here, I want you to have this”.

She passed over to him a small wooden figure of a horse, carved out of ebony. He reached out and took it from her, and her heart skipped a beat at the touch of his hand on hers. He placed it carefully into his gauntleted hand, needing no hands to ride as he studied the figure she had given him. He was impressed by her handiwork, it was elegantly crafted with attention to detail. She was indeed a typical Noldor Elf.

“I made it myself some time ago, I can tell you love horses just as I do, so I thought you might enjoy this, as a reminder of our time we shared together.”

He was so touched by this token of affection.

“Hannon le. This is beautiful, Neldoriel. I will cherish this always, and our time we have spent together.”

 

 

 

Notes:

Híril nin means My Lady in Sindarin

Hannon le means thank you in Sindarin

 

Chapter 11: Lady of Light

 

Days passed and they were back the camp. All had been well in their absence, Galadriel had remained a prisoner, under close guard and in shackles. Neldoriel actually felt quite guilty about this now. Despite her initial feelings of anger and jealousy towards Galadriel, she now knew these fears were unfounded. She was still her kin, and she had respect for her status as one of the greatest of High Elves. Adar had told Neldoriel all about his plans and why Galadriel was being held captive, it was all tactical. He had also told her about his plans to lay siege to Eregion. This troubled her greatly to hear.

“I understand the depth of how much you hate Sauron”, she had said to him, “I too wish for him to be gone from this world but what of Eregion? It will be destroyed. I have friends there, a lot of innocent lives will be lost.”

His answer was resolute.

“The city will be destroyed regardless, either by my army or by Saurons doing. Celebrimbor has lost control and the city has fallen into shadow.” He added in a softer tone, “there is nothing to be done. If my army can destroy Sauron quickly, the city may yet be salvaged when it is all over.”

She could see his reasoning but it still caused her great sadness knowing what was going to become of the beautiful Elven city. She had to hope that there was a chance that Eregion wouldn’t be destroyed entirely and that Sauron could be killed or captured swiftly.

 

***

 

As she wandered around the camp one afternoon, lost in thought about everything that had happened recently, she was walking around looking at the floor, hardly paying attention to her surroundings at all. She absentmindedly ended up right in front of the area where Galadriel was being held captive.
Neldoriel looked up, her expression like that of a startled deer. There was nowhere to hide and she and Galadriel’s eyes met. She couldn’t avoid her forever, Neldoriel supposed. 

Galadriel was sat on the floor, wrists in shackles and tethered to a post. Whatever the history was between her and Adar it was very clear that he didn’t trust her at all.

Breaking the silence, Galadriel spoke first.

“So it is you who was sneaking around the other night, I knew there was someone there.” She studied her for a moment. “Who are you? I don’t believe we have met. I can see you are Noldor, where is it you reside? Eregion perhaps?”

“My name is Neldoriel, my home is in nature. I don’t tend to stay for too long in one place.” She answered awkwardly. And you are the famous Lady Galadriel, you are right, we haven’t met formally. I’m sorry for the circumstances of our meeting, welcome to the Uruk camp.” She added slightly sarcastically, but not enough to be rude.

“And how is it that you came to be here in this place, you seem to be here willingly?” Galadriel asked, questioningly. 

“Well, I was captured much like you were.” Careful about how she worded it, she continued.

“I hadn’t killed any Uruks, I went to Mordor out of curiosity, so my manner of captivity wasn’t as strict as yours.”

She bit her tongue, stopping herself from what she really wanted to say, remaining respectful. Really she wanted to call her a huil for putting a knife to her Adar’s neck and for whatever else she had done to Adar in the past that had made him so mistrusting of her. But she needed to be smart, making an enemy of Galadriel wasn’t going to help their cause, if there was a chance for there to be peace between Adar and the Elves in the future, she needed to be a peacemaker, not creating more conflict. Galadriel never needed to know that is was she who had hand picked some of the more grotesque looking items on the dinner table that day, she thought to herself mischievously. 

“But yes, I am here by my own choice. I was released a long time ago and I could leave anytime I please. I do not wish to though, I’ve been happier here in this Uruk camp than anywhere else I’ve spent time at over the years”, said Neldoriel.

Galadriel remained silent, waiting for Neldoriel to continue. 

“Over time I’ve got to know Adar, and we have become, close”. The tone of her voice and the look on her face conveying exactly what this meant. Neldoriel was quiet and unassuming but showed a defiant confidence, like a protective she-wolf watching over her mate and her pack. 

Galadriel was intrigued by this.

“Really? He calls himself Uruk, but perhaps he has more Elf left in him than it would appear.” 

“He has a beautiful and pure soul, he only fights to protect the Uruks. He didn’t ask for any of this, or what was done to him by the forces of darkness. All he wants is to be left in peace, but his hand has been forced. The High King wants them eradicated and now there’s the threat of Sauron too.” Neldoriel sighed. “I won’t interfere with any of this, it is not my place. I just wish there was a peaceful solution to it all. I hope you and he can come to some sort of agreement.”

”You love him.” Galadriel said quietly and thoughtfully.

“Yes.” Neldoriel replied, unable to hide the emotion in her voice. “We have a connection, I see him, who he really is. An Elf just like you and I, one who deserved so much better. It breaks my heart to think what he’s been through.” 

Galadriel could see Neldoriel’s feelings, and it made her question how she had treated Adar in the past. This young Elf had clearly seen something in him, enough to give her heart to him. Love was so sacred to the Elves and she knew that this must be something very deep and real between them.
Maybe she should learn to overcome her own stubbornness and be more open to the idea of working with Adar instead of against him. 

“There is clearly more to Adar than meets the eye.” Galadriel mused. “And you, Neldoriel. Your kind and loving heart, and desire for peace is inspiring. Perhaps there is yet hope, after all we do share a common enemy.”

The two Elves regarded each other with a newfound sense of mutual respect.

“I hope for a positive outcome and that you will be released soon. If you’ll excuse me, Lady Galadriel, I must go.”

Galadriel nodded, Neldoriel dipped her head respectfully in return and left. 

 

***

 

Adar sat alone in his chambers after yet another long day of battle planning and preparations. He rubbed his forehead tiredly, he missed Neldoriel.
There were so many things of late demanding his attention and he wished he could spend more time with her, especially after the beautiful moments he had shared with her recently.

His heart was weighing heavy, spending time with Neldoriel had been healing and unlocking his Elven spirit that had for so long been hidden deep within him, and everything that was happening at Eregion was causing conflict in his mind.
He had to bury these feelings and become hardened once again, he was too far in to abandon the attack now. He had to destroy Sauron, his children would never be safe while the deceiver lived.  

He sighed and rose to his feet, deciding to go for a walk to clear his mind. 

He walked along the edge of the woodlands that surrounded the camp. From here he could see down into a valley where a large area of trees had been felled for the construction of the huge war machines that were all assembled in the scene in front of him. He folded his arms and leant against a tree, brooding darkly. The siege was soon going to take place. He had assembled a formidable army of thousands of Uruks, their shouts and the sound of metal weapons clanging could be heard echoing in the valley. The scent of decimated trees and smoke rising from campfires filled the air. Everything was in motion, he just needed to give the word. 

 

He felt her presence before she was even there.

“Suilad, Neldoriel” he spoke into the darkness. She came up next to him in silence, neither one of them taking their eyes off the scene in front of them.

Neldoriel’s heart was filled with sorrow at the sight of the vast expanse of destruction before them. It broke her heart to witness what was coming to Eregion. 

“Is this truly the only way? She asked him with tears in her eyes. She knew the answer, she just didn’t want to believe it.

He closed his eyes with a look of pain on his face. His heart was breaking also at the the despair this was causing to her and to himself. He turned to look at her, taking her face in her hand.

“I am sorry. There is no other way.”

She nodded tearfully. Silently she stood by him, resting her head upon his shoulder as they gazed back over the ominous valley together. 

 

Notes:

 

Suilad means greetings in Sindarin

 

 

Chapter 12: Into Darkness

 

Night had fallen and Neldoriel sat alone along the same tree line where she had been with Adar earlier that day. Her breath created mist against the crisp night air as she sat in silence beneath the stars.

She was resting beside a little campfire that she had made, sitting atop a tree stump, after all, there were plenty of them around recently. She was feeling melancholy, lost in her thoughts while she busied herself sharpening her beloved sword, the sapphire in its pommel glittering in the firelight with every stroke of the whetstone.

She looked up as a long blast sounded from a deep and resonating horn. She stood up and looked out over the valley. The horizon looked as if it were on fire as the torches of thousands of Uruks lit up the black night sky, and the ground shook as they shouted and chanted and began to rally together. Throwing her whetstone on the ground, she rushed back to the heart of the camp.

It didn’t take her long to find Adar, who was authoritatively giving out orders to Uruks who were running around frantically.

“Adar, what is happening?” She asked him worriedly.

His face was fierce and resolute. “It is time, the hour of battle is upon us. Tonight we march on Eregion.”

“Alright, let me come with you.” She said with her own sense of determination.

“No. I can’t risk you getting hurt.” After a moments pause he then softened. “I couldn’t bear it if anything were to happen to you.”

She knew it was futile trying to convince him. The gravity of what was happening hit her and she felt great anxiety, what if the worst were to happen and she was never to see him again?

“Please Adar, be safe. Make sure you come back to me.” Tears fell from her eyes and she wrapped herself around his body, burying her face into his chest and tightly clinging to him.

Blinking back tears and staring out of focus into the distance, he held her protectively in his arms as feelings of conflict and desperation washed over him. It was causing him such despair, knowing the pain it was causing her, the destruction, the bloodshed he knew was coming to his Uruks.

He didn’t want this. All he ever wanted was to create a home for his Uruks, but the return of Sauron had changed everything. What other choice did he have? “If anything happens to me, promise me you will run from here and go somewhere far away.”

“Don’t even say that, I can’t lose you Adar, you mean everything to me. But I will do as you ask, you know this. I would do anything for you.” 

Reluctantly pulling away from her, his face was full of pain and sorrow as he kissed her softly on the lips. “I will return. Stay safe, my Lady.”

Wiping away tears from her face, she tried to be strong for him. “I will look after things as best as I can here while you are gone.”

Her sweetness and loyalty was devastating and he could barely bring himself to leave her. With a final kiss to her forehead, he turned and left. As he walked away he felt as if he had left his soul with her. All emotion was buried deep within his heart as he once again became the hardened war lord.

 

***

 

Neldoriel waited for what seemed like days in anguish wondering what was happening at Eregion, and if Adar was safe, as she listened to the sounds of destruction and war in the far distance.

With Ûlfa she had helped keep everything in the camp running, making sure there would be food and supplies ready for when the Uruks returned from battle. On more than one occasion Neldoriel had considered talking Thalion and riding down to the city, she wasn’t weak, she could defend herself. But she kept her promise to keep out of harms way, and instead prayed frequently to the Valar for his safety.

It was late morning and Neldoriel was near the edge of the camp, tending to the horses. She was brushing Thalion’s light grey mane when she noticed his ears prick up, a deep nicker resonating in his chest as he looked past her at something he had spotted. 

Her heart leapt as she saw a small party returning in the distance. Adar was among them, and Galadriel in chains, being led by some Uruks. The negotiations between Adar and Galadriel had not gone well she noted sadly. There were two other Elves also. One of whom she knew to be the herald Elrond, and another, a soldier that she did not know. The group were headed with purpose towards Adar’s quarters. She so desperately wanted to run to him, but she knew she had to show restraint and wait until after the business that was taking place in the tent. She went away and waited for him, sitting at the top of the trench a short distance from Adar’s tent.

 

After a time, the meeting seemed to be over and Elrond and the other Elf departed the camp. She noticed Uruks dispersing from Adar’s tent also, some of them were muttering bitterly amongst themselves. She didn’t like this feeling of unrest.

Finally, Adar emerged from the tent. He looked exhausted, physically and mentally. Climbing swiftly from her vantage point, she flew down to him.

“Adar!” she cried softly, care and relief emanating from her. “You have finally retuned to me”.

“Neldoriel.” Taking her hand, he smiled tiredly at her. “I have missed you greatly.”

She wrapped her arms around him in a warm and loving embrace, and kissed his scared face. He held her tightly, breathing in her familiar and comforting scent.

“I am sorry, I would invite you inside, unfortunately I have a prisoner being held inside my quarters. I have much to tell you.”

“You don’t have to tell me all about it now, you must be exhausted” she said gently. “First, come with me, you can rest in my tent.”

He was so weary, he allowed her to lead him by the hand in the direction of her tent.

 

As they stepped inside her tent he looked around. It was so different from the time she first arrived at the camp in Mordor, back when it was no more than the plain and empty ‘guest quarters’. Now it was full of life, over time Neldoriel had accumulated different pieces of furniture and decorations, she had books and other little objects that she had made by her own hand, much like the little wooden horse that she had given him. Behind a decorative wooden screen was a washing and changing area. She offered to let him use it if he wished. For now though, they were just happy to be reunited.

In her tent she had created a reading station with a little desk and a comfy armchair. She gave him the armchair and took a smaller wooden chair for herself. At first he had refused and offered to take the less comfortable chair, but she insisted, refusing to take no for an answer. He gave in, and they sat together. Adar filled her in on everything that happened, and they continued talking until the sun had gone down.

 

Eventually Adar was so exhausted, he could barely keep his eyes open. He hadn’t slept in days. Neldoriel had been fiddling around with one of her wooden trinkets while they chatted, after a while she looked up to see that his head was resting on his hand and his eyes were closed.

She looked at him with adoration and sympathy. “My poor, sweet Adar.” She whispered, getting up from her chair. She took his hand and he looked up at her, only half awake. Silently she led him her bed. “Don’t argue, you must sleep.” 

He had no energy to protest, and gladly laid down on top of her soft bed. Within minutes he was sleeping peacefully, Neldoriel stayed with him and snuggled up against him. He was still wearing his armour but she didn’t mind. Watching his chest rise and fall, she watched over him as he slept. He looked peaceful yet troubled at the same time. She felt so protective of him and just wanted to take all of his pain away.

Reaching down toward the end of the bed, she pulled up a soft lavender coloured blanket. Leaning over, she covered him with the blanket and kissed him on his forehead softly so she wouldn’t wake him. Lying closely next to him she stayed awake as long as she could, watching over him and making the most of every minute with him before he would inevitably have to return to the battle. Eventually the sound of his rhythmic breathing lulled her to sleep as if it were a sweet lullaby, and the two of them spent a few blissful hours together in peaceful slumber before reality would soon be upon them again. 

 

 

Chapter 13: The Uruk Funeral

 

They awoke in darkness to the sound of commotion and unrest. Getting up swiftly, they exited Neldoriel’s tent together. Outside, the Uruks were in disarray. Many casualties had been brought back to the camp, dead and dying.

Amongst the chaos, Neldoriel spotted Ûlfa, she was trying by herself to carry an injured Uruk into a tent, so Neldoriel rushed over to help. “Here, let me help you” she said as she helped Ûlfa lift the wounded Uruk.
She and Adar’s eyes met and he nodded to her in a silent farewell. His attention was then taken elsewhere as he had troubles of a different nature to deal with.

Neldoriel worked tirelessly with Ûlfa and some other Uruks, helping as many injured ones as possible, her mother had once taught her how to dress and heal all sorts of injuries, and she had put these lessons into practice over her many years. 

As she was bandaging a wound she noticed Glûg stalking past, muttering in Black Speech. She hadn’t had many interactions with Adar’s right hand Uruk before, but his demeanour unsettled her. Further chaos ensued as more Uruks began to run around, ordering each other about with shouts of “Find her!” “The She-Elf is missing.” “No, not that one, idiot, the one with the yellow hair.”

She needed to find Adar. 

 

She finally found him, crouched forlornly on the ground, near rows of his beloved Uruks that had passed away. She approached him and gently put a hand in his shoulder. He grasped her hand in return as she knelt down beside him.

He sighed. “Galadriel has escaped, the Uruks have been searching for her, but to no avail. It matters not.”

Neldoriel was surprised for a moment at his indifference to his prized bargaining tool being gone. But then she saw it in his face, the sadness that he was feeling at what was happening to his children. It pained him so much to see them suffering. In the background, pyres were being assembled. She understood what was happening. Out of respect for their Uruk custom, she withdrew and retired to Adar’s chambers. She would be there to comfort him after the Uruk funeral.

 

***

 

He came in to the tent, visibly suffering. Eyes glistening from when he had wept for his fallen children. Neldoriel had been waiting for him, knowing that he would be hurting, and she wanted to be there to bring him comfort. She got up from where she had been waiting and went to him, full of concern. She stood closely to him and looked into his eyes.

“Adar, I’m so sorry about your children. I can only imagine the pain you must be feeling through all of this.”

He blinked a few times, fighting to suppress the feelings and stay strong. But he was so worn down. From his past, the fighting, all of it. He didn’t want this, but he had no choice. If he gave up now, Sauron would win and his children would be forever lost. He felt guilt for the deaths of so many of his Uruks but it was a sacrifice that had to be made to save them as a whole. 

“This is my own doing, they are being killed because I have sent them into battle, but there’s no other way. If Sauron isn’t stopped then the Uruks will become his slaves. It’s necessary for the greater good.” He spoke with resolve, and resignation.

Neldoriel nodded. She hated what this was doing to him, but she was there to support and comfort him, not make him feel worse.

 

He could always talk to Neldoriel, she cared about him. She was the only one who ever had. He was so tormented from his years upon years of suffering. 

“The words we use at Uruk funerals, In flames they return to darkness. Is this my fate too? I fear my soul is too tainted for me to ever be allowed entry onto the shores of Valinor.” He paused for a moment, and the sad look on his face broke her heart. “I don’t even know what I am any more, neither fully Uruk or Elf. No place or purpose in the world, other than to destroy Sauron and stop him from using my children as his slaves. I will never be accepted, not by Elves, not by the Valar, and not by any of the races of Middle Earth. And when my time comes to die, I will simply cease to be.”

He sadly and tenderly brushed a stray lock of hair from her face as tears threatened to fall from her eyes.

“Neldoriel, you shouldn’t waste your time with me, you are so pure, and so beautiful. You should leave this place behind and go to Lindon, you could have a life there. There would be an abundance of fine young Elves, you could find your soulmate and lead a fulfilling life in comfort, it’s what you deserve. I have nothing to offer, only darkness.”

His heart was in pieces at this thought, how he wished things could be different. If he were pure and unspoiled, a worthy candidate, and they had met before Morgoth came, when he was a young Elf, he would have courted her, he would have brought her wildflowers, taken her for romantic walks along winding cobblestone paths through beautiful Elven cities, expressed his feelings for her with sweet gestures. He looked down at the floor, defeated. 

Neldoriel’s eyes brimmed with tears, completely overwhelmed with emotion.

“I don’t need or want any of that, I have already found my soulmate and he’s standing here, in front of me. I love you, Adar.”

His world fell apart when he finally heard these words. He had loved her for so long, but hadn’t dared to tell her, hearing her say the words, that she found him worthy of her love, it broke him. For so many years he believed that this was something lost to him.
His strong facade crumbled and she took him into her arms. He buried his face into her soft hair, and for the first time in centuries, he broke down. She held him tightly, pulling him in close while stroking his silky dark hair as she felt the sobs wracking through his body. Silent tears fell as she wept with him.

 

They stayed like this for a while, silently holding each other. He was so desperate for this, to be loved, accepted. Slowly they came apart while still holding each other.

And then, without hesitation, he took her face into his hands and with so much emotion, he kissed her. Years of loneliness and rejection were being let go. Her arms slid around his neck as they kissed passionately. Caught up in the moment, they made their way to Adar’s bed, neither one letting go of the other, and remaining in their heated embrace. His weapons and armour were cast aside. 

Neldoriel sank back into the bed, awaiting him. His eyes pierced into hers, full of desire, wordlessly asking if she wanted to continue. In response, she pulled him to her and brought her lips to his, she wanted him with every fibre of her being. This was all the confirmation he needed and they fully let go, hands trailing over each other as they were locked in a passionate embrace. He deftly began to unlace her clothing and she melted at his touch.

“Adar, I want you.” She whispered breathlessly.

His eyes burned with desire for her as he became one with her, taking her gently at first, then more urgently as their passion intensified. She surrendered herself to him, completely undone. He was perfect, everything she dreamed he would be and more. They stayed entwined with each other well into the night until they were both spent.

 

Afterwards, they lay together in the soft fur blankets of the bed, in the most intimate and loving embrace. The world around them and all its cares forgotten. The only ones that existed were the two of them. He had fallen asleep, exhausted. Neldoriel lay next to him in a dreamlike state as she traced her fingers gently across his face, he looked so peaceful and relaxed. She truly did love him, with all her heart. She didn’t want this moment to end, but tiredness took her and she succumbed to sleep, peacefully in the arms of the one to whom she had given her heart.

 

 

 

Chapter 14: Everything to Lose

 

Morning came, soft light permeating through the rough fabrics of the tent as the sun began to rise. The two Elves were sleeping peacefully, wrapped together in a comforting embrace under the soft fur blankets. 

Adar began to stir, the room coming into focus as he awoke from the most peaceful slumber. He looked down at Neldoriel who was still sleeping contentedly in his arms. His mind went back to the events of the night before. So much had happened. It hadn’t quite sunk in yet, the gravity of what had happened between them. She had accepted him, and loved him, despite everything and they had become one in body and spirit.

Pulling her in closer, he cherished this moment, kissing the top of her head tenderly and breathing in her scent. She smelled like a wildflower meadow on a warm spring day. He felt like this was a dream that he never wanted to awaken from.

Sensing her waking up in his arms, he smiled at her as she opened her blue eyes and smiled at him with warmth. 

“Mara amaurëa Vanima,” he murmured, his low and husky voice humming in his chest.

She reached out and stroked the side of his face lovingly. “Good morning Adar.”

“Your words from last night, is it true or was it some sort of beautiful dream?” He asked, still in disbelief of all that had happened.

“I meant every word of it meleth nín. You have my heart, now and forever.”

His eyes were filled with emotions at her words. “And you hold the fragments of my heart, sweet one. You have given me something I no longer thought possible. I love you too, Neldoriel.” He was almost moved to tears uttering these words, the realisation that after all these long years, he now knew what love felt like. “Yet… I do not know if I can give you what you seek. Morgoth saw to it that I am but a remnant of who I once was.”

“Shhhhh, my love, don’t say that. I see the beautiful depths of your soul.” She gently brushed a stray lock of dark hair from his face. He took her hand in return, kissing it softly.

Despite all the love she had shown him, he still felt like his Elven soul was no more because of what Morgoth had done to him. Along with all his other worries, he now feared that he was going to break this poor woman’s heart by dooming her to waste her love on someone who had no Feä, he would never be able to go Valinor with her, and she would be alone for all eternity. And there was still the matter of Eregion to deal with. She was also now in danger because of him. He had to finish this.

Reluctantly he began to get up and dress himself. Neldoriel blushed and looked away shyly. 

He couldn’t help but be brought out of his seriousness for a moment and he gave a small smirk at her reaction, with a wicked glint in his eyes. He would love nothing more than to take her back to bed. “I’ll give you some space to get dressed. Come and meet me afterwards.”

Ever the gentleman, she thought to herself. Kissing her on the lips, Adar picked up his sword and left the tent. 

 

 

Swiftly she got up and dressed, heading back to her own tent to get washed and dressed properly. Since getting Thalion and her belongings back, she had a selection of clothes to wear. She chose a midnight blue dress, with silver embroidery in typical Elvish style. As ever she was practical, and remained armed with her bow and sword, one could never be too careful. 

Remembering Adar’s words, she went to find him. By now he was back in his own tent, sat at the wooden dining table, battle planning, sheets of parchment strewn across the table. Quietly entering the tent, she smiled at the sight of him, he was so beautiful. Heading over to where he was sat on his wooden chair at the head of the table, she planted a kiss on his cheek and sat down next to him.

Looking up from his battle plans to give her his full attention, he couldn’t help but be in awe of her beauty. Her eyes complemented her dress and her flaming red hair looked especially striking against the deep blue of its fabric. 

Gently running his fingers through her hair, he sighed. “Neldoriel, you are so beautiful, I wish we had more time…. but I have to go back to the siege, I cannot abandon it now.”

She knew this was coming, this beautiful time of happiness couldn’t last forever, not here, in a battle camp. “I wish there was another way, that we could just run away together and forget about all of this.” She replied sadly.

His eyes were pained. How he wished it were possible. 

“I cannot abandon the Uruks to Sauron.” He looked down at the table, so heavily burdened. “And now, my love, I have even more to fight for.” He gazed deeply into her eyes. “I know Sauron and what he is capable of, a great manipulator, he will use what one holds the most dear against them.” He felt immeasurable guilt at dragging her into all this. “I will not lose, I cannot let anything happen to you.”

“How would he know about me?” She asked.

“Believe me, he would find out about you one way or another, and use you to get to me. He has powers over the Unseen World that are beyond us.” His expression was dark. “I would raze Eregion to the ground to keep you from harm.” 

Neldoriel’s feelings were a mixture of understanding and despair. “Adar, I can’t bear this. Last night our souls were united as one, how can I wait around again not knowing if you will return. What if something happens to you?”

“I’m so sorry my love, for causing you to be caught up in this. This is all my fault, all of it. I should have let you go right at the beginning, so you could have been free from all this. Loving me can only bring you pain.” A single tear fell from his eye. 

“Adar, I would rather die tomorrow than live forever having never known you.” Her eyes were also filled with tears as he took her into his arms, holding one another in a comforting embrace. “You won’t let me go with you, will you?” She murmured.

“You know I can’t risk your life, nor bring you to Sauron, I need to you to stay far away from this place. Take Thalion and go somewhere safe, if I fail…. he will come.” His eyes burned with hatred for Sauron. “I will not let that happen.”  

“I love you Adar, so much.” Neldoriel sniffed. She was so worried, now that the siege was coming to a head, she knew the danger for him was going to be heightened. She felt a sense of dread that something bad was going to happen to him.

In response he whispered quietly, “I love you, my dearest one. With everything I have.”

Softly they touched their foreheads together in an intimate expression of love and emotional connection.

“When this is all over, we will find each other. This isn’t goodbye”. Taking her face into his hands, he kissed her softly. “Tenna enta lúmë, namárië Neldoriel.” He turned and left the tent, heading down to the battlefield for the final time.

 

 

 

Mara amaurëa Vanima means good morning beautiful in Quenya.

 

meleth nín Means ‘my love’ in Sindarin

 

Fëa is the Quenya word for soul 

 

Tenna enta lúmë, namárië Neldoriel. Quenya. Translates to: Until that time, farewell Neldoriel. 

Chapter 15: Crimsonleaf

 

She took Thalion and left, the sounds of the siege still echoing as she rode silently away from Eregion, she could bear it no longer. She rode until she could no longer hear the sounds of war. As Adar wished, she would find somewhere secret and safe, she was good at that. She had an idea of a good place to take refuge. Eventually she came to a secluded woodland, part of the very same woods she grew up in. Dismounting, she quietly entered the woods.

 

Tears fell silently as she walked in solitude with only her faithful horse trailing behind for company. She loved the woods, they were her safe place, her home. So diverse in life, little animals could be heard rummaging through the undergrowth, the rustling of dried leaves on the ground, and the sound of the birds singing sweetly in the trees. Trees twisted into various shapes and angles, their leaves glowing with orange and golden tones as the late afternoon sunlight hit them. 

Usually she would be filled with a sense of joy and curiosity as she explored the woods, hopping up onto logs, feeling the textures of different trees and leaves as she went. But now though, she wandered, barely looking at her surroundings, she had no plan other than to find the deepest, most secluded part of the woods to go and be alone in her sadness.

 

She came to a clearing amongst the densely packed trees. Lush green grass dotted with colourful wildflowers were surrounded by beautiful trees of different forms and colours. Oak and ash, birch and beech. A myriad of colours, greens, golds and reds. Tallest of them all was a towering and ancient looking beech tree, its copper leaves contrasting with its silvery grey trunk.

Finding a comfortable spot to hide, Neldoriel came to sit on the grass under the huge beech tree, leaning back against its gnarled and twisty roots. Sweet floral scents lingered in the air while butterflies danced all around, seeking the nectar from the numerous wildflowers of the meadow. This place was beautiful, she wished she could bring Adar here. She just wanted to be with him, in peace, and now she didn’t know if she would even see him again. After their beautiful and life changing time together the night before, her feeling of loss and longing was enough to break her heart. Hugging her knees to her chest, she broke down and began to sob quietly. 

 

The ground started to tremble around her with the sound of branches cracking and dirt being ripped from the ground. Neldoriel leapt to her feet and spun around, staring in awe as the giant beech tree began to move. 

“Huruuuumm….. who is making this noise and disturbing my sleep?” Boomed a loud and ancient voice which resonated deep into the earth. It was a mighty Ent, a shepherd of the trees, awakened from its slumber. 

“M-my name is Neldoriel, of the Noldor. I mean you no harm.” She couldn’t quite hide the nervousness from her voice. She had heard tales of the Ents but she never dreamed she would meet one face to face like this. 

The Ent leaned in closely to inspect this intruder, his vast branches creaking and groaning as he loomed forward slowly. His eyes were knowing and intelligent, the cracks in his silver bark of his face gave him the look of a wizened old grandfather, full of ancient wisdom. He was at once imposing yet serene. 

Sucking in a long whistling breath, and exhaling loudly, the Ent spoke. “A curiosity that thou art named after the Neldor tree. I wonder, Neldoriel, is thy name fitting, or do thee, like so many others, come to destroy the woods?”

”No, never! I have deep respect for the woods, I was born here you see, and I have always lived as one with nature.” She tried to reassure the Ent that she was no threat. 

“Hmmmmmmm.” The Ent hummed, a low and long sound which made the ground tremble. “I remember a family of Elves that lived in the woods not far from here. They had a child. A little red haired girl that used to run off exploring the woods.”

Neldoriel smiled as the Ent seemed to remember her. 

His features turned into a frown as he began to grumble. “But you are noisy, disturbing the peace. Is there no other place for this whimpering? You were sitting on my feet and disturbing my trees.”

Wiping the remaining tears from her eyes, she tried to present herself to this majestic being with grace. “I am sorry, truly. Please excuse me, I didn’t mean to intrude and disturb you.” Looking around, she continued. “This place is wonderful, and you are magnificent. If I may, what is your name?”

The Ent was won over by her manners and appreciation for nature, and softened in his demeanour. “My name in the common tongue is Crimsonleaf. I watch over the trees here with my wife, Silverroot. She is somewhere deep in the woods, attending to the saplings.” He said in a long and rumbling voice.

“I am honoured to meet you, Crimsonleaf.” Neldoriel answered with a small bow to show her respect. 

“Huuum hurum….” The Ent muttered and grumbled, pondering. “What brings thee here? I had hoped nobody would ever find this place, yet we have been discovered. At least only by a lonely Elf and not a pack of those axe wielding, murderous, Orcs. Running around like rats, ripping, burning and breaking. The scent of fire and shattered pines carries from Eregion.” Crimsonleaf said sorrowfully. 

“I am fleeing Eregion. I cannot bear to witness the destruction any longer.” Thinking it best to not yet mention that she knew the Uruks, or anything about what was happening there.

The Ent nodded knowingly. “I hear the cries of the trees and know their pain. Trunks splintered and branches burned as their sap bleeds into the ground. My dear Silverroot cannot bear it and is filled with despair. She barely utters a word these days.”

“I am sorry, Crimsonleaf, it must pain you greatly. ”She placed a hand sympathetically on one of his branches. Her eyes again filled with tears as she thought back to what was going on in Eregion.

“I too carry sadness, of a different kind, as well as despair for the land. My love remains in Eregion, I don’t know if I will ever see him again.” Pausing for a moment, she decided to share the whole truth with the Ent. It went against her nature to lie or bend the truth, especially to a wise and noble being such as this. And Crimsonleaf seemed like a gentle soul, so she opened up and shared her story, how she had met Adar and come to love him. And his true self, behind all the darkness.

Instead of being met with wrath for being affiliated with Adar and the Uruks, Crimsonleaf hummed and nodded, listening quietly. 

She confided in the wise old Ent, pouring out all of her sorrow and worries, talking for what seemed like hours with this majestic yet sympathetic being.

 

“I feel so lost, Crimsonleaf. He says it would have been better for me to have not known him. My whole life I have felt so alone, until now. I will always love him, no matter what. But now I feel he is going to be taken from me, I hope I am wrong, but I fear the worst.”

“Just as the beech tree relinquishes its leaves to the winter winds, you must let go of your despair, young Elf. Let your roots grow strong and keep you grounded against the storm.” The Ent offered thoughtfully. “You have brought light to this Elf who has fallen into darkness. A love as pure and as strong as this will not be forsaken. You must have faith in the Valar, and Ilúvatar himself, for the redemption of Adar’s soul. Pray for him, child. For your prayers may yet be answered.” His rumbling and deep voice reverberated through the glade. 

Neldoriel felt a new hope and her spirits were lifted. Yes, perhaps not all was lost, maybe Adar would survive and there could be a future for them.

“Thank you Crimsonleaf. Your wise words have helped me greatly. One day, with your permission I would love to return here with my beloved, and that all the sorrow and despair will be a distant memory.”

The giant Ent slowly rose up to his full height from his hunched over position, his branches creaking and his leaves creating a rushing sound as he moved.

“You are welcome in this place anytime you wish, young Neldoriel. Now, away with thee, I sense that the conflict in Eregion may be coming to an end before long, the trees seem to be calming. Go, and be at peace.”

Neldoriel again bowed respectfully to the mighty Ent. “Thank you for everything Crimsonleaf. I hope to meet you again, and Silverroot too.”

“Farewell little Elf.” The Ent settled back into position, the great guardian of the woodlands once again slumbering, but still watching over his beloved trees. 

 

 

Chapter 16: Rána

 

Neldoriel’s hope was renewed. Her meeting with Crimsonleaf was no accident, she had faith that the Valar were watching over her and Adar. She decided to make her way back towards Eregion. Far away enough to be safe, but close enough that she would know when the fighting was over. 

Night had fallen, she had left Crimsonleaf’s woods and ventured into a place of mixed deciduous trees and evergreens. The forest was silent and calming, with a full moon illuminating the night sky as she meandered along quietly, thinking of Adar and everything that had led up to their wonderful night together. She was brought out of her dream like state when she noticed Thalion become alert, ears pricked up as he sniffed the air curiously.

“What is it, mellon nín?”

Thalion acted as if he wanted to go in a certain direction, there was a scent in the air, something familiar to him.

“Take us where you will, old friend.” Neldoriel reassured him with a quiet voice, and the grey horse trotted on deeper into the forest.

She trusted her horse with her life. She thought back to the day he came to her many years ago.

Sat among the grass on a quiet hillside, looking down at the herd of majestic and unique horses that lived near her homeland, unknown to all but Neldoriel’s family. Descendants of the ones that were brought to Middle Earth from Aman. Quietly and purposefully the young colt had come to her from within the midst of his herd, approaching her with serenity and confidence. She stroked his soft muzzle and spoke to him softly “len suilon, mellon nín.”

 

Once again she was brought out of her reminiscing as Thalion suddenly came to a halt, looking intently into the darkness of the trees. Neldoriel quietly dismounted and waited in anticipation. The sound of hooves slowly approached, muffled by the soft ground and pine needles covering the forest floor. 

A lone mare emerged from the pine trees. Her sleek black coat gleamed in the light of the full moon, its reflection shimmering in her intelligent eyes. Neldoriel took a step forward, not wanting to spook her.

“Easy, girl.” She whispered quietly. She sidled up alongside the dark horse and very gently and softly stroked the side of her neck. The mare allowed this, standing calmly and showed no signs of wanting to flee.

“Thalion, she is one of your kin, isn’t she? It’s as if we were meant to find her here.” The grey horse blew through his nostrils as if in agreement.

Neldoriel’s heart was filled with hope as she thought about the meaning of this, her family had always been blessed by the companionship of these noble horses, and now another had come forward, just as Thalion had come to her all those years ago. This ethereal black mare was for her beloved, she felt it in her heart.

“Nán alassea omenita le.” Neldoriel spoke quietly to the mysterious horse. “If you wish to come with us, I have someone very dear to me who would love to meet you.” The ebony horse threw her head up and down contentedly.

“I name you Rána, for we met under the light of the full moon.” 

Neldoriel went back to Thalion, patting him gently, thanking him affectionately for being such a good horse. Nimbly, she hoisted herself up into the saddle and they continued their journey through the forest with their new friend following behind. 

****

 

Day was breaking and finally they reached the edge of the forest, overlooking Eregion. As Neldoriel looked into the distance she could no longer see the trebuchet’s launching their flaming boulders at the city. Was the battle over? She could not be sure.

“Thalion, wait for me here with Rána. Stay safe and out of sight, dear friend.” She told him as she dismounted, and made her way down through the forest towards Eregion. She had waited long enough, she needed to know if Adar was well.

 

 

 

Len suilon, mellon nín. Means ‘I greet you, my friend’ in Sindarin

 

Nán alassea omenita le. Means ‘I am joyous to meet you’ in Quenya

 

Rána means ‘Moon’ in Quenya 

Chapter 17: Envinyanta

 

Carefully and swiftly she made her way down the incline through the forest. She had no idea where to find him or even if he was alright, but she had faith that she would find him. 

She went as far as the edge of the forest, where the siege had taken place, looking out at the aftermath of the battle. The bodies of Elves and Uruks alike littered the ground as smoke rose from the decimated city of Ost-in-Edhil. It was a mournful sight. She couldn’t dwell on it now though, the most urgent matter was finding Adar. There were no signs of life on the battlefield, had Adar and his Uruks retreated back to the forest perhaps? Back she went into the depths of the forest. Traversing swiftly through the pine trees, she started to worry again. Where could he be?

“He’s alright, he’s alive.” She mumbled, trying to reassure herself. 

She came to a small clearing. Moss covered the ground and crept up over fallen logs and rocks, small fir tree saplings sprouted from the undergrowth amongst the towering and dark pine trees. She went and sat down upon a large mossy rock, to focus and calm herself. 

 

After sitting a while and gathering her thoughts, she sensed a presence among the trees, she wasn’t alone. Silently, she crept down from her rock and hid behind it, listening. No Uruks were present, from what she could discern, an Elf was coming, one of Gil-Galad’s soldiers perhaps? She had to be careful.

She peeked out from behind the rock, bow at the ready. She couldn’t see anyone there, just shadowy pine trees swaying gently in the breeze.

“Show yourself!” She called out, aiming her bow into the darkness.

Slowly, a dark figure came into view amid the shadowy depths of the forest, moving with a familiar grace and elegance. She knew straight away it was her Adar. Relief washed over her. Throwing her bow to the ground, she ran to him, instinctively throwing her arms around him in a loving embrace. He wrapped his arms around her in return, clearly glad to have found her, but he was showing signs of being in shock. She could feel him shaking slightly and his breathing was heavy. Protectively, she pulled him a little closer. 

“Adar?” She gazed at him, taking him in. He looked different, his scars were gone, his skin was radiant and unblemished. She looked into his eyes, and he looked back at her with deep emotion and vulnerability.

Touching a trembling hand to his face she whispered, “Iston i nîf gîn. How can this be?”

His voice was a hoarse whisper. “I was searching for you.” He was struggling to find the words, he had been through such a monumental change and he was shaken to his core. 

“I am here, meleth nín.” She whispered comfortingly. 

He offered her his hand which she gently took, caressing his soft skin affectionately. She noticed that on his smallest finger, he was wearing a sparkling and delicate silver coloured ring made with Mithril, with a beautiful clear white stone set into its centre. Gently she turned his hand over and inspected the ring. “This is one of the Rings of Power.” 

Her touch was calming to him. The healing properties of the Mithril had permeated his being, and he was starting to process what had happened.

“Yes. I defeated Elrond and took it from him, it belongs to Galadriel, Nenya is its name. I took it, foolishly thinking I could use it to defeat Sauron. But, this ring is pure, it has great powers of healing and protection. It has restored my outward appearance, this is how I used to look, many, many years ago.”
He gave a wistful half smile, pausing for a moment, thinking of his long lost past. “But not only that, I feel… different. The effects of Nenya go deeper than the surface, I feel healing within me. Perhaps, it isn’t too late. And you, my beloved, have been bringing me light from the moment we met.”

 

No longer in the shadows, they had moved into the light as it filtered down through the boughs of the pine trees in the mossy clearing. Standing closely together, he held her by the waist, smiling down at her. He looked ethereal, a gentle and pure Elf from a time long past. He was so beautiful.

Neldoriel had no words. All she could do was whisper his name. “Adar……” 

The only sound to be heard for miles around was the soft sighing of the pine trees as they moved gently in the wind, shielding the two Elves from the world around them. Holding her lovingly in his arms, they kissed tenderly. Sinking down slowly onto the soft mossy ground of the forest floor, they lay together, hearts and spirits connected forever as one. 

 

***

 

They stayed there together afterwards, peacefully leaning against the mossy rock that Neldoriel had been sitting on earlier that day. Adar held her closely against him as she snuggled into his warm body, trailing her fingers lightly and absentmindedly over the soft skin of his unblemished chest as they whispered sweet words of affection to one another.

They could not stay here forever though and they began readying themselves to leave. Sweetly attending to each other, Neldoriel helped Adar to fasten his clothing and armour, giggling as he gently removed a piece of moss from her hair with a loving, yet amused look on his face. 

His voice was calm and soft as he spoke quietly. “I will soon return to the way I was before, on the outside at least. I must return Nenya to Galadriel. I need to seek forgiveness and try and rebuild bridges, to undo some of the damage that has been done so that we might have peace. I want a future with you, my love. With you, and with my Uruks. If I can make amends then perhaps we can return to Mordor and we will be left alone to live in safety. The Elves can finish the task of dealing with Sauron once I return Nenya to them. No more fighting, no more vengeance. I only wish to return home, with you, Neldoriel. That is, only if you want to. Will you… come with me?” He asked with a sweet and worried sort of vulnerability which melted her heart.

“Oh Adar, my love, of course I will. I would go to the ends of Middle Earth and beyond with you. You don’t have to fight anymore, everything will be alright.” She replied gently.

Relief and warmth flowed through him at her love and acceptance. He had hope, hope for a future and for peace and forgiveness. “I will regroup with the Uruks, but I must take off the ring before I speak with them, this form is not familiar to them and they will be confused. I do not know if they would accept me while I look like this.”

Neldoriel smiled at him adoringly. “They would love you no matter what, just as I do.” 

“Your words touch my heart, Aryantë.” Adar said softly.

Taking a deep breath and mentally preparing for the change, he took off Nenya. His appearance slowly returned to its previous self, his radiant and flawless skin giving way to his old scars and pallor. He looked at Neldoriel with sadness at returning to his dark form, wishing he could be beautiful for her.

She knew his feelings without him saying a word. “You are still so beautiful. I always thought you were, right from the beginning. I love you, Adar.”

His eyes shone with emotion, he knew she meant every word. He took her hand, their fingers lacing together as they walked through the forest.

“Adar, I have a gift for you. While you are doing what you have to do, I will go and retrieve it.” So much had occurred that day she had almost forgotten about the horses. She was excited to introduce Adar to his new companion. She remembered the way he had connected with Thalion so naturally before, and how Adar had told her how he had enjoyed horses when he was young. 

Parting with a sweet kiss, they promised each other that they would meet back up very soon. With lightheartedness and a spring in her step, Neldoriel began to make her way up through the pine forest, to the place she had left the horses. While Adar headed towards the direction of his dear Uruks with hope in his heart for the future.

 

 

Notes:

 

Iston i nîf gîn means ‘I know your face’ in Sindarin

 

Aryantë means daybringer in Quenya

 

 

Notes:

The chapter title, Envinyanta, means: ‘Renewed, healed,’ in Quenya.

At the time of posting, today marks exactly one year since the season finale, where we were shown Adar’s beautiful redemption, and his tragic fate. I hope this story can bring comfort to any that are missing him, and wanted him to live. 🖤✨

Chapter 18: Vartië

Notes:

(Trigger warning) So after his redemption, we all know what comes next… heads up for anyone who might be upset reading about the events of the episode 8 season finale….

 

 

Neldoriel had made it back up through the forest to the horses, it had taken her longer than she had hoped but she had finally arrived. Mounting her own loyal horse, she set off in the direction of the place Adar had said that he would be with the Uruks, with the new horse companion trundling along behind.

She rode through the forest, weaving through the pine trees as she trotted along, when suddenly she was brought to attention as she heard the sound of sticks snapping and leaves rustling. A female Uruk came forward from the trees, Neldoriel recognised her immediately.

“Ûlfa, what are you doing here?” She asked with surprise. She didn’t like the look of fear on Ûlfa’s face. Something felt terribly wrong. 

Ûlfa was out of breath. “Neldoriel, there you are. We’ve been searching for you. Come quick, Adar, he’s been betrayed!”

Neldoriel’s breath caught, she felt her chest tightening and a pit in her stomach. “What has happened, is he in danger?” 

Ûlfa looked hastily back towards the centre of the forest, and then to Neldoriel with a look of fear and urgency.
“He was betrayed by our own kind. Too many for him to defend against. I do not know if he is dead or alive. Please, come with me, I can take you to him. I didn’t know what else to do.” 

Neldoriel did not hesitate. She extended her hand to Ûlfa. “Quickly, show me where he is. We must hurry.” The Uruk took her hand and leapt up onto the back of Thalion.

Neldoriel spurred the grey horse into motion and they began to gallop deep into the forest. Leaning forward, she whispered urgently into the horse’s ear. “Noro lim, Thalion,” and they flew through the trees at great speed. 

Tears fell from her eyes as they charged through the forest. Her mind was racing. He’s been attacked? Why, how? Why would his beloved children do this to him? Ûlfa said she didn’t know if he was alive or dead, the thought made her feel sick to her stomach. She began to pray fervently. “Valar please, I can’t lose him.” She whispered, begging for his life, desperately hoping that someone, anyone, was listening.

After what seemed like an eternity, Ûlfa pointed ahead towards a clearing. “Over there!”

Thalion slowed and Neldoriel leapt down from the saddle. She ran towards the clearing, where rays of sunlight were softly shining down from among the canopy, the pine trees quietly whispering in the gentle breeze. It should have been beautiful, if not for the sense of dread that filled the place. She slowed to a halt and she felt overwhelmed with a terrible pit in her stomach as she looked at the horrific scene in front of her. 

Adar was lying on the ground, lifeless. A couple of Uruks were kneeling by his side. More were hidden among the ferns, watching on in fear. A disastrous event had just taken place. The floor was stained black with blood that was seeping from Adar’s broken body, where he had been attacked without mercy. Betrayed by his own children. 

Neldoriel fell to her knees, shattered and traumatised at the realisation of what had happened. The atmosphere of the forest around her was deathly silent, the horror of this reality setting in. Barely finding the strength to move, silent tears fell as she crawled over to him. The two Uruks that were watching over him made way for her. She put a trembling hand on his chest, his beautiful, tattered armour and his clothing were soaked with blood. There were so many dreadful wounds all over his body. His face was blank and bloody. 

The poor soul hadn’t had the fight in him to try to defend himself. He loved his children so much, yet they had turned against him. 

At the first blow he hadn’t yet realised what had happened. He couldn’t comprehend that his loyal child Glûg had done this. And then came another piercing blow, and another, and another. He could no longer stand, and he fell to the ground as so many of his Uruk children continued the onslaught.

He was tired, he had been tired for so many long years…… he reached out his hand and with a ragged, shallow breath, he spoke in Black Speech, “My…Children…”

Glûg stabbed him a final time and Adar’s hand fell to the ground.

 

Gently brushing a lock of black hair wet with blood from his poor lifeless face, she whispered with a trembling voice. “My dear, sweet Adar, no……. please wake up. Meleth nin, please.” Nothing. He was gone.

Overwhelming sorrow took over and she broke down. Lying protectively against his lifeless body, she wept, shaking uncontrollably as sobs wracked through her body. She had lost everything. Her beloved one, her soulmate, so cruelly and suddenly snatched away from her. He had been so peaceful and full of hope earlier that day, she truly thought she was going to spend the rest of her days with him. She had loved him, with all of her being, more than she ever knew was possible, and now he was gone. The thought of living her long life without him, mourning him forever was more than she could bear. Is this how her mother had felt when her father had died?

 

Time seemed to stand still as she lay grieving on the forest floor with her fallen love. She was covered with his blood but she did not notice. Ûlfa had come and quietly sat on the floor nearby, mourning.

Paralysed with grief and unable to leave his side, Neldoriel let her mind go elsewhere, memories of him were all she had left. She was no longer sobbing, though tears silently fell. 

Leaning against the huge pine tree, they looked out over at the sunset over the grasslands. He had his arm around her, the warm glow of the setting sun bringing out beautiful red tones in his dark and soft hair as she snuggled against him. They were back at the forest where they had shared their first kiss together, a time that now seemed so long ago and held so many happy memories.

 

Neldoriel was snapped out of her dream like state. She had noticed something. Very faintly, she thought she felt him breathing. No, it couldn’t be, she must be delusional from her grief.

She dared to hope though and lay very still, gently resting her face against his chest, hoping and praying for another breath. Slowly but surely she knew that he was breathing, shallowly, and unsteadily, but somehow he was still there. He was alive. Fresh tears came, how could this be? It wasn’t possible to survive wounds like this. She remembered Crimsonleaf’s words about having faith. The Valar had heard her and taken pity on them. Her prayers had been answered and Adar’s life had been spared, everything was a blur but she thanked the Valar quietly, and focused on helping him. She had to work quickly, he had survived, but his wounds were still dire. 

She quickly took off his beloved and broken chest plate, placing it to one side and ripping fabric off of the bottom of her cloak. Working her hands underneath his chain mail, she tied a makeshift bandage to slow the bleeding from the worst wound on his chest. She instructed one of the Uruks that had been sitting nearby to keep pressure applied to it while she worked on some of the other wounds. This would help for now, but there was no certainty that he would live. The wounds would need cleaning and tending, and she needed to get him to somewhere safe. She could sense a disconcerting presence nearby and wanted to get out of this pace swiftly.

As if he had read her mind, a burly male Uruk spoke up. “Tis the work of Sauron, she-Elf. He won them over to him with his lies and now they do his bidding. Cowardly scum.” the Uruk growled and gnashed his teeth. “There are a few of us here that would not follow Sauron, we will always remain loyal to our Lord father. We will stay close and keep guard while you help him. We will fight if we must. Help him, Elf. We Uruk do not have the healing hands of your kind.”

Neldoriel put her hand kindly on his shoulder. “Thank you, I promise you I will do all I can to save him.” She looked down at Adar. Her eyes filled with tears once more. “I must save him, he is everything to me.”

Ûlfa came to stand beside the large male Uruk. “Thank you, Elf sister, I don’t know what we would do without you.”

Neldoriel touched Ûlfa’s arm affectionately. “And thank you Ûlfa, if it weren’t for your loyalty and bravery, I may not have got to him in time.”

Ûlfa clasped her hand over Neldoriel’s before retreating into the undergrowth with the other Uruks, leaving Neldoriel alone in the clearing with Adar. He wasn’t conscious, and barely hanging onto life. She gently kissed his forehead. “I will save you, my sweet one, please don’t leave me.”

 

Neldoriel looked over to Thalion. The horse knew her thoughts and came over, with Rána following. The horses were calm, almost reverent, they were intelligent enough to know what was happening. “I’m sorry Rána, this isn’t how you two were supposed to meet. Will you help me, sweet mare?” The black horse nickered softly and sadly. She lay down on the floor so Neldoriel could get Adar onto her back.

Slowly they set off to find a place that was safe, far away and hidden from Sauron. Neldoriel rode closely beside him, making sure he stayed on the horse. Rána walked so carefully and gently so that he wouldn’t fall off. Leaving the pine forest behind, they came to the open grassland. The sun was starting to go down, grey and dark blue clouds loomed overhead but in the distance, the sky glowed gold and yellow as the sun was setting over the far away hills. A light in the darkness, giving her hope. 

A thought came to Neldoriel. They weren’t too far from her childhood home. It was just beyond the grasslands, the place where she used sit with her parents and watch the wild horses running free. It was old and dilapidated but would still provide them with some shelter. Hidden away deep in the woods, nobody would find them there. That is where she would take him. A safe place, where she would look after him and love him back to life. She looked at her beloved, lying slumped over the dark horse, his poor broken body still bleeding into Rána’s black coat. “Hold on, Meleth nin. Stay with me.” She whispered as they continued on across the plain, praying to the Valar that they would make it. 

 

Notes:

Vartië means ‘Betrayal’ in Quenya.

Chapter 19: House of Healing

 

Travelling all through the night, through valleys and over hills, she would not stop until they got to their destination. Eventually she found her secret woods, and there was the little cabin made from wood and stone, nestled among the trees. The gold and orange leaves were glowing warmly in the late morning sun and the vast weeping beech tree was ever watching over her old home, its leaves matching the autumnal hues of its smaller cousins in the woods.
Everything was just as she remembered it, nothing had changed since last she was here. This place was so remote, so isolated from the world. Untouched by Man or Elf, other than Neldoriel’s family many years ago. It was perfect. 

Looking across at Adar worriedly, she prayed that it wasn’t too late. Gently they went across the hilly landscape, towards the house. Remembering from her last visit that her old bedroom was quite well preserved, with all her strength she dragged him up there, and managed to get him on the bed. 

“Oh my poor, sweet Adar, what have they done to you?” Looking at him in this state, broken and barely clinging to life, she all but burst into tears.
She thought back to their time together while he was wearing Nenya, how sweet and innocent he was, his pure and gentle soul freed from the darkness. To have this violent betrayal happen to him just a few hours later, and left for dead in the forest, her heart couldn’t bear it. She had to save him, he had to live. He deserved so much more than this.

Taking off her cloak, lovingly and gently she draped it over him to keep him warm and comfortable, and tenderly holding his face, she kissed him on the forehead before swiftly running out to gather as many supplies as she could from her saddlebags. She went out to the stream that ran behind the old cottage, and filled up a large bowl that she had found in the kitchen, with water. A lot of the things in the cottage were still useable, even if they were old and weathered.

Hurrying back to her beloved, she pulled back the cloak that she had laid on him, and began to remove his clothing. Taking off his metal gauntlet and boots, and what remained of his armour, and setting it all aside. She had kept his beloved breastplate that she had removed before, knowing it meant a lot to him. For a moment she paused and just looked at him, fighting back tears at the sight of his precious body left in ruin.

One by one she took off the makeshift bandages that were saturated with blood and threw them into an old bucket. Carefully, using a clean cloth with water she cleaned each of the wounds before redressing them with fresh bandages. They weren’t pouring with blood any more but the bleeding hadn’t fully stopped. She hoped that this was a good thing, and not because he had bled out so much he had nothing left to give.

With new water, she then began to clean the blood off of the rest of his body. She talked to him, quietly, telling him how much she loved him and how he was going to be alright. She didn’t know if he could hear her, but she wanted to give him comfort. 

After she had finished tending to him, she carefully climbed onto the bed next to him and lay as close to him as she could without hurting him, burying her face into his neck. She wouldn’t leave his side, not for a moment longer than was necessary. However long it would take and no matter what she needed to do to help him, she would. He needed her and she would protect him and stay with him always. She loved him with everything she had.

 

Days passed and Neldoriel faithfully continued to look after him. She kept his wounds clean and changed his dressings. It was impossible to give him food but she managed to get small amounts of water into him, enough to keep him alive at least. 

The Uruks had followed along behind, and as promised, they stayed nearby, in the woods in little structures and huts they built for themselves made of wood. They kept watch over the area, always on alert for danger, and ready to protect Neldoriel and their Lord Father of the need ever arose. 

The loyal Uruks were eager to be of assistance, so Neldoriel had asked if some of them could go to go out and see what supplies they could get their hands on, but to make sure they stayed safe. A small group of brave young Uruks took it upon themselves to go back to the old camp at Eregion, and managed to get back many of Neldoriel and Adar’s old belongings, along with many useful items they would all need to get by. The Uruks were very proud of themselves and their findings, Neldoriel was very grateful to them but urged them to be careful.

***

Neldoriel drifted in and out of sleep on a small chair by Adar’s bedside. She hadn’t been eating or drinking properly because she was more concerned with looking after him.
There was the sound of footsteps outside, and Ûlfa arrived at the doorway carring a plate of food, peering through apprehensively. Neldoriel smiled at her sadly.

“I’ve brought you this, extra raspberries, and no rats”. Ûlfa teased, trying to cheer Neldoriel up. 

“Thank you, Ûlfa.” Neldoriel answered tiredly, her gaze returning to Adar. 

Ûlfa shuffled over and placed the plate on top of a small wooden table and pushed it right next to Neldoriel. “You have to eat something.” 

Her eyes not leaving Adar, Neldoriel answered distractedly. “Thank you Ûlfa, I’ll eat it later.”

“I’m not leaving until I see you eat something.” The Uruk answered stubbornly, folding her arms.

Relenting and picking up a piece of bread, she nibbled on it halfheartedly. She had all but lost her appetite recently from all the stress and heartache. “I’m starting to worry that he’s never going to wake up”. Neldoriel said.

“You’re giving him the best chance possible, we are thankful to you. Eat the food, keep your strength up so you can carry on looking after him, he needs you.” Ûlfa reassured her.

“You are right as usual Ûlfa. Thank you, I will.”

Ûlfa nodded knowingly and left the room, leaving Neldoriel in peace.

Neldoriel did feel slightly better for having something to eat, she was also so tired. Resting back into the chair, she allowed herself to drift off to sleep for a while.

 

She awoke after a couple of hours, having had sweet and fleeting dreams of happier times. She immediately looked over at Adar, who was still lying there peacefully. She smiled, he was so beautiful, even in this state. Getting up, she went to go and check on him. He was stable, nothing had changed. She missed him so much, even though they were together. She longed to hear the sound of his voice and gaze into his beautiful blue eyes.

Carefully easing herself onto the bed next to him, she very gently held him in her arms and stroked his hair, quietly humming an old song she had never forgotten from years ago. The song brought back memories, it was one her mother used to sing to her when she was just a little girl. A beautiful Elven melody, its meaning was of love and purity and the beauty of nature. She began to sing the song in its entirety, it brought light to her spirit as she soothingly sang to her beloved Adar as if she were pouring her heart into him through the words. Her voice trailed off quietly as he began to stir in her arms.

 

 

Adar’s thoughts were tormented as he slipped in and out of consciousness, he was so weak, but he was fighting, holding on to life. His fragmented thoughts were dark and his state of mind was hanging in the balance, the betrayal of his children had been so devastating. 

My children….why? How did they come to hate me so?….. It was my fault, I pushed them too far, too hard. I deserved it. 

Tired….so tired. Of it all. I cannot do this any more. I cannot bear what Morgoth did to me any longer. I should succumb to the darkness, it consumes me.

Yet…… there is one, who has shown me love…. that my life is worth something. 

I can’t leave her behind.

But the pain, the darkness, I am fading away….my strength is failing me. 

I hear her, calling to me. I must fight this. I have to try….

 

 

“Neldoriel……” he whispered, his voice was strained. 

“Oh Adar…..” Words failed her as she was overcome with emotion, eyes closed as she sweetly kissed the top of his head. 

He tried to turn to look at her but couldn’t move without wincing in pain. 

“Îdh, meleth nin, save your strength.” She spoke soothingly to him. “Let me help you.”

He accepted her help, painfully letting her help him up a bit in the bed. The regal and dignified Uruk warlord, he had always relied on his own strength, needing nobody. Now he was so vulnerable. But he trusted her with everything. 

“Here,” she whispered, helping him to eat some of the food Ûlfa had brought earlier. It was so good to see him eating something. 

“Where are we?” He asked quietly, looking around and taking in his surroundings. 

“After we found you in the forest, I brought you somewhere safe.” She said lovingly, tracing her fingers across his forehead gently.

”We? The Uruks? But they…” He began with laboured breaths.

“You still have loyal children, meleth nin. not all went with Sauron. Ûlfa, and some of the others wouldn’t leave your side, other than to look for help. Those dear Uruks have shown such bravery and loyalty. No one will find us here, this is where I spent my childhood.” Her eyes filled with tears thinking about him lying on that forest floor. “Oh, Adar, I thought I had lost you.” 

He didn’t have the strength to speak many words. Weakly, he took her hand, and she took his in return, kissing it affectionately.

“Don’t try to talk, you’ve been through so much. Just rest, my love, and get better, we have all the time in the world.”

 

***

 

The days blurred together, the healing process was long, the wounds were numerous and severe. Adar spent a lot of time sleeping, when he was awake, Neldoriel would talk to him, and give him food, while gently tending to his wounds. They seemed a little better, but not as healed as she would like. 

One night as she lay beside him, she was brought out of her dreams feeling like something was out of place. Wearily she opened her eyes as the moonlit room came into focus. Beside her, she could feel Adar shivering violently. It was a mild Autumn night and not cold. Propping herself up in the bed, she studied him worriedly.

“Adar, meleth nin?” He didn’t respond. She placed a hand to his forehead, he was burning up. Fear began to rise within her, this wasn’t a good sign. She needed to do something and fast. “I’m sorry my love, I won’t be long”, she whispered, kissing him on the head softly. Getting up out of the bed and quickly getting dressed, she silently rushed out of the cottage and into the woods. 

Swiftly and lightly she ran through the woodland, along tangled winding trails made by deer, brambles grabbing at her Elven cloak as she went. She knew these woods, and with purpose she ran, ducking under low branches and undergrowth, and climbing over fallen logs. Eventually she found what she was looking for. Athelas, she knew exactly where it grew in these woods. Picking a few sprigs, she turned and ran through the dark woods, back the way she came.

 

Back in the room, she hastily prepared the Athelas. Taking off his bandages, she applied the healing plant to the wounds. If this didn’t work, she didn’t know what would. Diligently and faithfully she stayed up with him all night, keeping him cool with a soft cloth soaked in water. She fought back tears as she looked after him. How much more was he going to have to go through? She was faithful also in her prayers and pleaded with the Valar that he would make it.

 

After a long night, morning finally came, soft rays of sunlight shining through the dusty window as she awoke to the sound of sweet sound of birdsong coming from outside. Adar was cuddled into her, his head resting on her chest as she cradled him against her. He was still shivering. Her heart broke as she pulled him closer. “I’m here my love, I’m here.” She couldn’t bear to see him suffering so much. All she could do was look after him, and pray that the fever would subside and that he would wake up once more. 

 

 

Chapter 20: Halls of Awaiting

 

Time had become a blur as she faithfully looked after him, always waiting and hoping. Neldoriel had lost track of exactly how much time had passed since they first came to the little house in the woods. As always, she was never far from her beloved’s side.
Walking over to the bed, she leaned down and held his hand, kissing him softly on his forehead. No longer did he look pained, the shivering and fever had subsided, and he looked peaceful. She had been keeping him cool with water from the stream, and treating his wounds with the Athelas plant, day and night.

As she rose to leave and go and get some food, remembering Ûlfa’s nagging about how that she needed to look after herself too, she felt his hand squeeze hers gently and stopped in her tracks.

 “Adar? Meleth nin?” She dropped back down to his level, searching his face desperately.

Slowly his eyelids opened, revealing the bright blue depths of his expressive and gentle eyes that she loved so much. His gaze found hers and he smiled at her tiredly. “Neldoriel” he murmured quietly, relieved to see her.

“My beloved Adar, you have returned to me.”  She whispered with tears in her eyes.

“How long have I been in this state?” He asked, his voice hoarse from having not spoken in such a long time.

She thought for a moment. “I have lost count of how many days have passed, I didn’t know if you were ever going to wake up.” She said, as a single tear fell fell from her eyes.

He looked at her with softness, and love in his eyes. “Neldoriel, vanimelda, you have done so much for me. Were it not for you, I wouldn’t be here now, I would have been lost to the darkness a long time ago. You changed everything for me.” He gazed at her with his soulful eyes, gently wiping away the tear from her face. “I’m so sorry for all I’ve put you through.”

She had no words. Overcome with emotion, she hugged him tightly but gently, tears silently falling into his long black hair. He wrapped his arms around her as tears of his own fell. They held each other for a while,  neither wanting to let go. Eventually, Adar pulled back so he could look at her, he had something he needed to tell her.

“I have been to the Halls of Mandos Neldoriel. The Halls of Awaiting. My spirit left my body while I was in that unconscious state, balancing on the fine line between life and death.”

”Mandos…” Neldoriel whispered reverently. “What was it like?”

”It was strange, yet peaceful. I must admit, I was scared, after all I’ve done….. I didn’t know what to expect. But the Valar took pity on me. During my time there I reflected on my life, on everything. I rested, and waited. And finally, I was released back to this body, the body that is still here because of your devotion. And although it is what I deserved for my crimes, I was not held there for a prolonged time, I was permitted to return to you. What happened to me, after Morgoth….” He trailed off. Neldoriel held his hand tighter, it broke her heart to think of it.

He cleared his throat, shaking off the thoughts. “After the all that’s happened in the past, and our love, was enough to move even Mandos himself, it seems.”

Neldoriel was in awe, and sat quietly, listening intently. 

“When you came to Mordor all that time ago, it’s because we were fated to meet, Aryantë. You said that many years ago you felt compelled to stay in Middle Earth, instead of sailing to Valinor with your mother, even though you did not know why. This is why.” He held the side of her face as they touched their foreheads together intimately.

Neldoriel once again remembered the conversation she had with Crimsonleaf, about the purity of love and having faith in the Valar, and Eru. Thinking about how different things could have been if she had gone to Valinor, and if she had never stumbled into the Uruk camp all that time ago, her eyes filled again with fresh tears.

“My soul is restored and healed fully. I have a future now and am considered worthy to one day go to Valinor. I’ve been forgiven.” His voice broke slightly. The burden he had carried all his life, regarding the future of his soul, was gone.

Neldoriel knew how much this meant to him, she had known since that fateful night of the Uruk funeral. She had no words. Quietly, she held his hand and listened, supporting him.

“My body in Middle-Earth will always remain broken and scarred, but inside, I have new life. If you will have me, I am yours forever. You have saved me in every way I ever thought possible.” He gazed at her, searching her eyes and awaiting her answer. 

“Oh my sweet Adar, of course I will. I want nothing more than to be with you forever. I am yours too, my heart is yours and I will love you until the end of time, my beloved one.” She answered as their lips met in a soft and sweet kiss.

 

Neldoriel left briefly to go and get them both some food, and to tell the Uruks that their dear Lord-Father had awakened. They received the news with excitement and cheering, and Neldoriel had given her Uruk sister Ûlfa a hug. 

Returning swiftly to her beloved, she sat cross legged on the end of the bed as they shared a bowl of raspberries together, enjoying each other’s company.

“How are you feeling, Meleth nin? Are you still in pain?” She asked him.

“A little.” he answered, downplaying it slightly. “I’d like to get out of this bed and look at something other than these four walls.”

She looked at him questioningly. “Are you sure, my love? Your injuries still have much healing to do, I don’t want you to be in even more pain.”

With a smirk and a dark glint in his eyes, part of his old facade returned as he started to get up. “I can endure it.”

It had been so ingrained into him for so many years, survival had meant not showing any signs of weakness. Pulling himself up from the bed, he felt a sharp twinge of pain, and faltered slightly, clutching at his side. Neldoriel rushed to help him, full of concern.

Anybody else would never be allowed to help him in this way, it was undignified, and he didn’t want to be weak. But with her, he could be vulnerable. He allowed her to help him, putting an arm around her shoulder as she led him out of her old bedroom and down the hall to another room.

She pushed open the door and together they stepped into the room. It was a large room, filled with light from its many windows. Its wooden panelled walls bore beautiful Elven style detailing, even though it was old and dilapidated. She hoped that in time they might be able to restore her old home to its former beauty and function.

“This was my parent’s room” Neldoriel murmured quietly. Adar softly stroked her arm with his fingertips, silently and comfortingly reminding her that she wasn’t alone anymore. Putting her hand over his, thanking him wordlessly, they made their way through the elegant bedroom and over to a a large balcony that overlooked the surrounding woodlands and endless grasslands beyond.

Leaning against the wooden railing, Adar breathed in the fresh air and took in the sight and scent of the woods and hills, there was a slight breeze in the air that gently whipped through his hair as the glow of the late afternoon sun brought out the beautiful red tint in his dark locks. He gazed out over the horizon contentedly as the sun radiated through the trees, he cherished the feeling of its warmth on his face. 

He was finally free. Free from the evil of Morgoth, never again would he feel the bitter pain of loneliness and rejection. He was redeemed. His gaze turned from the forest as he looked at his dear Neldoriel with knowing and loving eyes. Noticing him looking at her, she smiled at him back with warmth and love. 

For the first time in his life, he had a bright future. He finally understood what it meant to be unconditionally loved, and accepted. He had found his place in the world, he was at home. 

 

Chapter 21: The River

 

Adar sighed wistfully as the sunlight beamed through the dusty window, creating warm patches of light around the room. “I have rested long enough. I need to get out of this bed, I long to feel the warmth of the sun, to listen to the wind and walk among the trees.”

Neldoriel understood this so much, yet she still worried for him.

Stepping out of the cottage for the first time in weeks, Adar took a deep breath, letting the pure and fresh air of the woodlands fill his lungs. The gold and orange leaves of the surrounding trees made a gentle rustling sound as the wind moved through them, while birds sang peacefully from their branches. Being outside was so refreshing.

Behind the cottage was a stream, Adar and Neldoriel took a gentle stroll alongside it, listening to the sound of the water gently flowing beside them as they walked together hand in hand, following the rolling stream on its journey through the trees and beyond.

 

As they got deeper into the woods, the stream widened and grew, eventually becoming part of a majestic river, flowing calmly and endlessly through the vast woodland. The gently sloping banks of the river were bordered with overhanging trees and shrubs. Teal coloured damselflies flitted and danced about spiritedly as the sunlight reflected on their metallic wings, making them shimmer like emeralds.

Summer was behind them, yet the weather was still fine, the sun was beaming down through the trees and creating a beautiful sunspot in the light filled woodlands, the water looked so inviting in the heat of the afternoon. Adar gazed out over the water’s surface, deep in thought. 

“Shall we go in, my love? The water might be good for you”. Neldoriel asked Adar softly. He nodded in agreement.

Gently she helped him take off the black shirt he had been wearing, eliciting a small grunt of pain from him caused by his wounds. Taking off her own shoes and throwing them aside onto the sandy riverbank, together they stepped into the river, until they were immersed chest high in the water as it flowed gently and steadily around them, the fabric of her pale lavender dress soaked and billowing out in the water around them.

Having been warmed by the sun all through the summer, the water was cool but not cold. The sunlight reflected on the river’s surface as Adar closed his eyes and enjoyed letting the water flow over him, cleansing his body and mind. He hadn’t felt such peace in all his life. 

 

Lovingly she began to wash his body and hair with a cloth she had brought with her, sweetly cleaning him up and taking extra care around his healing wounds. She brought the cloth up to his neck, dabbing away gently and slowly. Pausing for a moment, she noticed that his blood from his wounds was no longer black, but red, like any other Elf. An outward sign of his inner healing and spiritual cleansing. She smiled to herself, it didn’t matter to her what colour his blood was, but she understood the peace and wholeness that was returning to Adar, that he so desperately wanted.

Adar closed his hand over hers, holding it gently. Neldoriel’s breath quickened as his gaze sought hers, his piercing eyes full of want. Closing the gap between them he walked through the deep water and took her into his arms. She blushed, their bodies pressed together as he held her tightly against him. Her legs trembled beneath her, threatening to give out, she wanted him so much.

“Adar…. you are not yet back to full strength.” She whispered shakily. 

“Strong enough for this,” he growled sensually into her ear as he lifted her up, helped by the water.
She wrapped herself around him, desire and pleasure rippling through her like a coursing river. Stifling a gasp as she lowered herself onto him, she entwined her fingers in his hair and they held on to each other, slightly out of breath as their foreheads touched, water dripping from the damp ends of their hair. She clung to his toned and beautiful body as he made love to her, right there in the river, the gentle flow of the water caressing them gently as they gave into their longing and need for each other. Lost in the moment, she didn’t even notice as the cloth dropped out of her hand and floated away down the river into the distance. 

 

 

***

 

They sat together in the shallow water by the river’s edge, the crystal clear water lapping around them gently as they revelled in the late afternoon sunlight shining through the trees, making the water’s surface shimmer. Neldoriel was finishing washing Adar’s hair for him, making sure any dried blood was now gone from his beautiful dark locks. She had always loved his hair. Idly daydreaming about when they had only just met, she couldn’t believe how much things had changed.

The first time she saw him, she was intrigued by him, and thought he was handsome. She never imagined that one day she would be here, looking after him. He was so closed off back then, so guarded. Now he trusted her with his life, and he loved her. And she would love him back for all time. Tenderly taking a handful of his ebony hair, she ran the silky black lengths through her hands, using the pure and clean water of the river to clean his soft hair. He closed his eyes in ecstasy as she ran her fingers through his hair and massaged his head. He was so relaxed, all of his troubles were behind him. He finally knew what true peace felt like. 

Embracing him from behind, she softly kissed the scarred skin on his shoulder. “You are so beautiful.” She murmured. 

He looked at her with half a smile and a glint in his deep and knowing eyes as the light from the water’s surface reflected in them. “I love you so much Neldoriel, my dearest one. Where would I be without you?” 

There on the riverbank, listening to the calming sounds of the cascading river, they kissed softly, never wanting to leave this beautiful place or each other’s side ever again.

 

Chapter 22: Elarion

 

The sun was slowly starting to rise, filling the little bedroom with light. Neldoriel was the first to awaken. Looking over at her beloved Adar, she smiled to herself as her mind wandered to the day before and their beautiful time at the river. He seemed so at peace now, and so happy. He was healing well and seemed a little stronger every day. He looked so peaceful lying there and she didn’t want to wake him. Brushing a stray lock of hair gently from his face, she got up, stretching. She quietly dressed herself in a simple cream coloured gown and went to go and bring up some food for them to share on the balcony of her parent’s old room. All the while thinking and planning in her head about the details of how their little house in the woods could be restored to its former glory. After setting up a small table and chairs on the balcony, she went back to wait for Adar to wake up. They had both been through so much trauma recently she didn’t want him to wake up and worry about where she was.

Crossing the bedroom, planning to go and sit on a chair and quietly read a book, her eyes were drawn to Adar’s gauntlet and ruined armour that had been set aside on a wooden table. It saddened her, she knew that his armour had meant a lot to him, and his sword too. It was still out there, somewhere. 

As she stood looking at his things, Adar had now also awoken. He quietly approached her, and gently embracing her from behind, he kissed her on the cheek softly.

“Good morning, beautiful. How long have you been awake?” He was wearing a plain black robe, the Uruks had managed to procure a lot of their old things from the evacuated camp back at Eregion.

As always, her heart did a little leap at his touch and she turned to face him, returning his kiss with one of her own. “Not long. I made us some breakfast. But then, I was just thinking about your old sword. I wonder if it’s still out there, in the forest…..”

Brushing a lock of hair behind her ear, he answered gently with a velvety soft voice. “Do not trouble yourself with this, melda nín, it matters not.” But he couldn’t help but looked saddened at the loss of his personal items, they were the only things he had left from his past. “Maybe it’s for the best, my past is something best left forgotten.”

“If I recall, I believe you said you were going to tell me about the history of your things one day.” She said playfully.

He looked at her with an amused look. “I did, didn’t I? It would seem that you don’t forget a thing”.

“You are right, I don’t. Not ever.” she teased.

“I don’t either, I’ll never forget the day I met you, how beautiful you looked, despite the mud that was on your face from sneaking around in my Uruk camp.”

“Really?” She rolled her eyes at herself, exasperated. She didn’t recall this. “No wonder you put me in the prison tent.”

He looked at her with amusement and a mischievous look in his eyes. “It was a guest tent actually.” Adar teased. “As for today, I would take you to bed even if you were covered from head to toe in mud, you would still be the most beautiful thing in this world. In fact, maybe I should take you there right now.” he whispered seductively with a dark and smouldering look on his face. 

Heat rose in her core and her heartbeat began to quicken. Slowly he leaned in and their lips brushed together in a slow and lingering kiss. Pulling away, his eyes searched hers, burning with desire. 

Trembling with need for him, she leaned in and they began to kiss intensely, removing each others clothing as they edged their way back to the bed. His love for her had filled her with a growing confidence, and she climbed up onto the bed, sitting astride him. Holding her waist he kissed her all over, making his way up to her neck as he whispered to her about how beautiful she was. His warm breath against her skin and the sound of his voice telling her how much he wanted her was enough to send her over the edge. She couldn’t even speak, other than to whisper his name as she quivered with pleasure. “Adar……” 

Forgetting his injuries, he gently yet assertively changed his position so that he was lying on top of her, his eyes gazing into hers intensely. Coming together in a heated kiss, he took her deeply and passionately, completely letting go and giving themselves to each other until they were both utterly spent. 

 

**

 

Together they sat on the large balcony in the morning sunshine, on the wooden chairs Neldoriel had set up earlier. They had finally gotten around to having their breakfast and were quietly and lovingly holding hands, looking out over the golden leaves of the woodland landscape.

“So, you still wish to know about my past?” Adar spoke quietly while still looking out over the woodlands.

“Yes, I love you Adar, I want to know all about it, all about you. But, only if you want to.” She replied gently, holding his hand a little tighter.

Nobody had ever cared enough to be interested before. The secrets of his heart were always something he had guarded carefully, but he trusted her, fully and with everything. It touched his heart that she cared so much and was so interested in him. Even now, he still found it hard to believe sometimes.

“My weapons and armour….you wanted to know about their history. They were gifts, from my family. The sword and dagger were passed down to me by my father, and his father before him. Family heirlooms, my father was always one for tradition. Had I ever had a son, it would have been passed to him.” Adar sighed. “I was young when Morgoth took me, but, I had hoped to have a family one day.” 

“You have me, and the Uruks are our family.” Neldoriel said with a small smile.

“And it means everything to me, beloved. I have never been so happy in all my life.” Adar said with sincerity and love.

”And your armour?”

“The armour, my mother had it made for me. She always loved nature, especially the rivers, and the stars…” He trailed off sadly.

‘You kept them for all these years? Neldoriel asked gently.

“Yes. It was all I had left. That, and my memories.”

She nodded in understanding, thinking of her father’s sword that was similarly sentimental to her.

“The gauntlet is not fully of Elven make of course, as the Lord-father of the Uruk, some modifications were made.” He said with a dark and mysterious look in his eyes, and his mouth curled into half a smile.

”Of course.” Neldoriel said with a smile of her own. “It’s only right that the Uruk are represented as well.” She loved the dark side of him as well as the light.

Adar looked at her with a smile in his eyes, so glad to have her never ending love and acceptance.

“Tell me about your parents, meleth nin. Your mother, what was she like?”

“She was gentle and strong, with all the elegance and grace befitting of a Noldor lady. She loved animals, especially horses. You would have liked her, I think.” He smiled wistfully. “We were nobility. My father desired greatness, he wanted to elevate our family, to become like the great royal houses. He had high expectations of me, lofty standards that I could never live up to.” He muttered resentfully. 

“I always knew you were Noldor, I recognised that you were of my people when I first saw you,” said Neldoriel.

Adar nodded. “Indeed. I also saw myself in you, the day my Uruks captured you and brought you before me, bold and defiant. Getting into trouble, just as l was when I was a young Elf. I rebelled against my father’s oppressive values. I couldn’t stand the haughty society, I had no desire for it. I took after my mother, and just wanted a simple life. I wanted an escape and it led me down a path I would live to regret. I do miss her, I wonder if I will ever see her again… and my father. I do not know what became of them.” 

Neldoriel’s heart ached for him, knowing too well the pain of missing her family. “Perhaps they are in Valinor, mine too.” She said very quietly.

“Ah, Valinor.” Adar sighed. The great city of Tirion, it was beautiful… I loved nothing more than to take my horse, and ride for miles along the glittering shores of Eldamar, or make the journey across the plains to Ezellohar.” His presence was ethereal, and radiant as he recalled his memories of his past. The beautiful and pure Elf that he had always truly been.

Neldoriel listened in awe as he spoke at length about his homeland. “You came from Valinor, among the first of the Noldor. You’ve seen the light of the Two Trees.” She spoke quietly and with deep reverence.

“Yes.” He answered, his eyes shining with ancient wisdom and the light that had always been within him.

”What were they like?” She whispered.

“They were the light of the world, their radiance was glorious to behold. The gold and silver of their leaves were as shimmering stars when stirred by the wind. They were day and night, sunlight and moonlight, their beauty and purity like none other.” There was sorrow and mourning in his voice for the loss of the Trees.

Neldoriel felt a sense of longing in her heart, a yearning to go home. “Though the Trees are gone, I still cannot wait to see these lands one day.” She said softly before continuing. “So your family, you all came to Middle Earth, much like my parents did.”

“Yes, my father’s pride, ambition and his mistake in following Fëanor led us to be among those who were caught up in the rebellion. Despite it all, I thought that if I sought to become powerful, I could bring glory to my family and make my father proud. So when Morgoth came, with his lies, his manipulation and promises of power, the foolish young Elf that I was, believed him. It was the worst mistake I could have ever made. I never saw my family again. Along with twelve others who were tricked like I was, or forcibly taken, we became the Moriondor, the Sons of the Dark. We were twisted and tortured, and made to do unspeakable things for the Dark Lord. I cannot bear to say any more about it.” His voice began to tremble slightly.

Neldoriel got up from her chair and wrapped her arms around him, holding him protectively, wishing she could erase his trauma. “Speak of it no more.” She whispered. All she could do was love, and comfort him. He returned her embrace and continued.

“They are all dead now, I’m the only one left.” His expression was pained and he was shaking slightly from the memories of the terror and suffering he had endured. 

“Be at peace, meleth nin.” Neldoriel whispered comfortingly.“It is over, you’re safe and nothing will ever hurt you again. I won’t allow it.” She added defiantly. “No matter what Morgoth did to you, the light of the Trees will always shine from within you. It’s always been there.”

Adar held her a little tighter, as he took in her words. Together they gazed out over the golden canopy of the trees, as their branches swayed and sighed in the breeze. They sat closely together for a while in comfortable silence, listening to the sound of the gentle flow of water trickling over rocks in the stream behind the cottage.

 

“Adar? What was your name back then?” 

“My name was Elarion.” He answered quietly.

“Prince of the stars.” She replied softly.

He scoffed. “A pretentious name that means nothing to me. It was the name my father gave to me, following the traditions and themes of the family lines. His name was Elarwë.”

Her eyes filled with tears. “No, It’s beautiful. Elarion. It’s a name that represents light, and the worlds beyond Middle Earth.”

He looked at her, taking in her words and contemplating. And for the first time, perhaps seeing his name from a different perspective.

“I’m honoured that you have shared all of this with me, meleth nín.” Neldoriel said after a while. 

“The honour is all mine, that I have someone to share it with, it’s the least you deserve, my love.”

 

Hand in hand they cherished the peace of the forest, as they gazed out over the woodland landscape before them, the golden leaves of the autumn woodland reminding Adar of his home from so long ago.

“If you are feeling up to it, I’ve got someone I’d like you to finally meet properly.” Said Neldoriel joyfully. 

Adar smiled and rose to his feet, extending out a hand to his beloved. “Lead the way, my lady.”

Notes: Melda nin means ‘my beloved’

Chapter 23: Faithful Children

 

Stepping out of the cabin, Neldoriel and Adar walked through the peaceful woodlands, quietly listening to the sweet sound of birdsong as they walked among the trees. Neldoriel had a spring in her step and a lightness in her heart as they made their way to their destination.

“Before we continue, we must go to see your children, they will be so glad to see you,” she said happily.

Adar agreed, it had been too long since he had seen the Uruks, so they continued on until they arrived at the part of the woods where the Uruks had made camp. It was reminiscent of the camps at Mordor and Eregion, but now they were hidden among the trees of the remote golden woodland. Makeshift little huts made from wood and some of the old tents salvaged from Eregion were dotted about. One by one, the Uruks noticed them approaching and they all came and gathered round. Ûlfa came to the forefront, with another taller, long haired and heavily built male, whom Neldoriel recognised as the one she spoke to on the day of the attack. 

“Lord-Father! It’s good to see you well again,” said Ûlfa, bowing low.

Her stocky male companion followed suit and bowed in reverence. “Adar. Some thought you wouldn’t make it. But we waited, and kept watch day and night. There aren’t many of us left, but we will always be loyal to you, Lord-Father. I’d rather die than follow Sauron. Not like Glûg and the other scum,” the Uruk said with loathing in his deep voice.

Adar was saddened at the reminder of his once favoured son. Being turned upon by his own children was a perfect example of Sauron’s cruelty. Adar loved each and every one of his children, with all of his heart. And he would forgive them, even after what they had done. He knew all too well how Sauron was able to get into one’s mind.

“Do not let hate for your brothers darken your heart, my son. We must learn to move on from the past, and live in peace,” Adar said with a knowing glance at Neldoriel. “What happened to me that day, it was Sauron who was behind it all.”

The Uruk nodded somewhat reluctantly, but with deep respect for Adar. “We found Glûg’s body in the forest, by some old ruins. We think Sauron killed ’im. Can’t say for sure though.”

Adar’s eyes filled with unshed tears. He could imagine the twisted satisfaction that Sauron would have got from killing Glûg, after convincing him to kill his own father. The Uruks were just a tool to Sauron, easily discarded and replaced when their use had run out. Adar mourned for the loss of his children, even after everything, he would always love them.

He knew that he had to keep his remaining children safe and out of Sauron’s grasp. They needed a home, but Mordor was no longer safe. They needed somewhere secret, and hidden.

Shaking off the feelings, Adar clapped a hand to the large Uruk’s shoulder. “Have there been any signs of Sauron since that day?”

“No, Lord-Father.”

“Good. Thank you, my good and loyal son, and daughter,” he added, turning to Ûlfa. “I will never forget your loyalty and how you have watched over us while I was incapacitated. I am proud of you all, my children. Know that I will always protect you in return.” 

“As will I.” Neldoriel added with a small smile.

The burly Uruk turned to Neldoriel. “Thank you, she-Elf, for what you’ve done for Adar. You saved him.”

”I promised I would try. What is your name, Uruk?”

“I am Augdakh,” the Uruk replied. 

“Thank you Augdakh, for everything,” Neldoriel smiled.

Augdakh bowed, and turned to leave, touching his forehead to Ûlfa’s, before heading into the depths of the forest with a couple of smaller Uruks, to begin their patrol of the area.

More Uruks gathered around Adar to greet him, most of them hadn’t seen him since he had been left for dead on the forest floor, and they were relieved that he was alive and well. Cheers and chants of ‘Adar!’ resounded through the trees as he walked through the group of Uruks, greeting each of them by name and with fatherly love. 

While Adar was busy with the Uruks, Neldoriel came to stand beside Ûlfa. 

“You and Augdakh seem close.” Neldoriel teased with a small smirk.

“Yes. He is my new mate.” Ûlfa said with a grin.

“Is he now? Well, he’s a fine Uruk, I’m happy for you.” Neldoriel smiled.

Ûlfa smiled back at her in her toothy, typically Uruk way. Neldoriel was happy to see the Uruks seemed to be thriving, and she knew Adar would be happy too.

 

After spending some time with the Uruks, the two of them continued on out of the woods and into the grasslands, where Neldoriel whistled into the distance. The sound of distant hooves could be heard and eventually two horses came into view, grey and black, galloping over the hill in the horizon.

Thalion joyfully cantered over, dancing around with excitement. Neldoriel greeted him with matching joy.

“Suilad, Thalion. I’ve missed you too, my dear friend. I hope you have been looking after our new companion.”

The black horse shyly approached and Neldoriel quietly stroked her muzzle. “What a sweet girl you are, loyally waiting for so long. This is the horse that carried you here, meleth nin. Her name is Rána,” she said, turning to Adar.

Adar quietly approached the dark horse, and softly touched his hand to her face. 

“Thank you, Rána,” he whispered quietly, softly stroking her forehead as she nudged him playfully with her nose.

“She likes you,” Neldoriel smiled.

“She’s a magnificent animal, she reminds me of my horse from when I was young,” Adar said with a smile. “Thank you, Aryantë. The one who brings light to my life.”

Neldoriel suddenly felt a pang of sadness for the life he had missed out on, the things he had lost.

“Adar, I’m sorry for all you went through, and that you were so alone, for so long. I wish it didn’t have to be that way for you.”

He looked at her with love in his eyes. “Do not lament, Vanimelda, I would change nothing, for if my life had gone a different way, then I may not have met you.”

This statement broke her heart, he spoke with such love, it almost moved her to tears.

“Oh Adar, I love you so much.”

“And I love you too Neldoriel, with everything that I am.”

He took her into his arms and she wept, holding on to him tightly as he held her gently and protectively. Their eyes met and they kissed sweetly and lovingly, hair and robes billowing in the wind as a light breeze blew across the grassy plain. 

Adar was not yet strong enough to ride, though he wanted to. Sending the horses back out across the plains, they started to head back, agreeing that they would return once he was well enough.

 

They were almost back at the cabin, as they walked, Adar was clutching at his side where one of his wounds was causing him pain. Neldoriel wrapped her arm around his waist lovingly, worried that he had overdone it. A young Uruk, slender framed, yet muscular, spotted them from the trees, and ran over. 

“Lord-Father, a group just came back from hunting for supplies, and we found something!” He said excitedly.

“Ozrad. What is it, my son?” Adar asked tiredly, but with interest.

“Come with me, I’ll show you!” The young Uruk was enthusiastic, and ran toward the trees, turning and waving a hand for them to follow.

“Take it steady, my love.” Neldoriel said softly.

Adar as always, was touched by her care for him, and kissed the top of her head sweetly, before following the young Uruk into the woods. 

After a short walk they came to a small clearing, where the hunting party had gathered after returning from their expedition. They were in high spirits after finding many things while out exploring and chattering amongst themselves in their language.

“Lord-Father, over here!” Ozrad called.

The young Uruk was crouching on the ground, rummaging through the items that they had managed to procure. Rising to his feet, he turned around and handed something very precious over to Adar.

“My children… where did you find this?” Adar whispered. 

“We found it in the forest back at Eregion, Lord-Father, just lying there on the ground,” Ozrad replied.

Adar gazed upon his beloved and ancient Elven blade. Though tarnished and weathered, it was an exquisite sword, and a precious memento of his old life. 

“Your loyalty will never be forgotten, my dear children. Thank you.” Adar said quietly, placing a hand on Ozrad’s shoulder. Weariness was beginning to overcome him.“I must go and rest, I trust the woodland camp will be safe in your hands, my son.” 

“Yes, Father!” Said the young Uruk proudly. 

Adar nodded approvingly and he and Neldoriel departed, heading back to their home. 

 

“I can’t believe they found it, Adar, I’m so glad you have your sword back. Those dear boys. Though, I do worry about them, it’s not safe for them to keep going out for supplies all the time, if they are seen, they could be killed.”

“I fear you may be right. We need to find a safer home for them,” Adar sighed.

“My family, when we lived out here, we lived off the land. Maybe we could teach the Uruks too.”

Her care for them warmed Adar’s heart. Right now, he needed rest, so they returned to their little house in the woods, where they would stay until he was strong enough for the journey. And soon, they would venture out and find the perfect home for Adar’s faithful children.

 

 

 

Chapter 24: The Uruk Caves

 

A few days passed as Adar and Neldoriel spent their days peacefully while Adar rested and recovered, and now they were finally ready to ride out and explore their lands. Neldoriel was putting on her leather bracers and readying her bow, excited to be going out into the woods. Although it was badly damaged, Adar wore his beloved armour. She didn’t show it, but she was saddened for him. 

As before, they went out into the plains and called for the horses, leading them to a little wooden stable area just outside the house. Neldoriel put on Thalion’s saddle and bridle, and there were spares for Rána too.

Carefully Adar mounted his horse, mindful of his injuries, and together they set off into the golden woods. As they rode along, Neldoriel closed her eyes and inhaled deeply. It was so good to finally be riding again.

“Enjoying yourself?” Adar teased, as he rode alongside her.

“It’s wonderful, Adar. How is it for you? How does Rána handle?”

“She is a good horse. But at this slow pace, I’m yet to see what she can really do. Come, I’ll race you to that mountain range,” he said, gesturing to some high peaks in the distance beyond the forest.

“But Adar, your wounds…” she began.

With a smirk, and a whisper into Rána’s ear, he flew on ahead, not giving Neldoriel chance to talk him out of it. Neldoriel sighed and shook her head in amused disbelief, and set off after him. 

The sound of thundering hooves echoed through the trees, the wind whipping through her hair as she sped through the forest. She could see Adar up ahead, weaving through the trees like a dark shadow. They were fast, much faster than Neldoriel had anticipated, and she was having trouble keeping up.

“Is that the best you can do?” Adar called back to her teasingly.

“Let’s show him, Thalion!” She said to the grey horse, encouraging him to go faster. He picked up the pace, tossing his mane extravagantly and throwing himself fully into a gallop, not about to be outdone. 

They broke through the forest into an expanse of grassy valleys. Before them was a vast lake, its calm surface glittering in the sunlight as they galloped across the plain. Beyond the lake, were the mountains, surrounded by yet more golden woodlands. 

They came together side by side, riding alongside the magnificent lake. Rána was a beautiful, athletic horse and she could barely contain her excitement, whinnying with joy as they ran together across the beautiful landscape.

Neldoriel locked eyes with Adar, unable to keep up the facade of annoyance. He should be taking it easier than this, but she understood as well as anyone the thrill of galloping across the land. Rider and horse as one, the freedom of it, it often felt as if they were flying.

Eventually they slowed down and came to a stop at the top of a hill, overlooking the lake. Both were slightly out of breath from their exhilarating ride.

“I won.” Adar said smugly as he pulled up alongside her.

“I would say that was a draw, I caught you up.”

“I slowed down to let you catch up. I have to commend you for trying though,” Adar said with a mischievous glint in his eyes.

Neldoriel looked at him with a frown, eliciting a laugh from him. At this, her expression changed and she smiled, it made her heart sing to see him so happy.

They had got off their horses and together they sat on the hillside, looking out over the lake’s crystal surface.

“This is the furthest I’ve ever ventured into these lands. What a beautiful place this is...” Neldoriel mused while taking in the view. 

With a sigh, she lay back in the grass, watching the clouds as they slowly drifted by. Adar came to lay beside her, propped up on one arm as he gently brushed a stray lock of hair from her face.

“It’s not nearly as beautiful as you,” he whispered, gazing soulfully into her dark blue eyes. 

Neldoriel blushed as he leaned forward and kissed her. Bringing her hands up to his face, she kissed him back, tracing her fingers along his neck and through his long, dark locks. Their hair was flame and shadow intertwined as they lay closely together, kissing sweetly on the hillside as the wind whistled softly through the long grass.

 

They stayed for some time, lying among the tall grass and watching the wind rippling on the surface of the lake in the distance. After a while, they journeyed on, finally arriving at a cluster of woodlands at the base of the mountains. And here they found something of interest, along the rocky surface of the mountainside, they noticed an opening to a cave. Neldoriel got down from her horse and went to get a closer look.

“This place looks interesting,” she said, peering inside.

“We should be cautious, this is unexplored territory,” Adar warned her.

Neldoriel drew her sword. “I’m going in.”

“It is futile to try to convince you otherwise, my lady. I wouldn’t expect any less, after all, if it weren’t for your curious nature, you might never have stumbled upon the camp at Mordor.” Adar smirked, amused at her stubbornness.

 

The two of them gracefully traversed the rocky slope down into the cave, barely sending a pebble out of place. Just beyond the entrance, the cave opened up into a huge cavernous area, with huge stalagmites and stalactites that erupted from the floors and ceiling of the cave. It was dimly lit with light coming from the cave entrance, and there were many smaller tunnels leading off from the main cavern. 

There were no signs of life, it seemed untouched. Neldoriel sheathed her sword as they started to look around the cave.

“This place is huge. I wonder, Adar, could this be a suitable place for the Uruks to make their home? It’s more sheltered and hidden than where they are now, and they would have protection from the sun here.” Neldoriel mused.

“Hmm. It could be. It’s certainly remote here, but still close enough to the cottage. We would have to check all the tunnels, to make sure it is safe.” 

Neldoriel nodded in agreement and they began to explore the smaller tunnels, most led to nowhere, or to other smaller caverns. All were completely untouched. As they walked through the network of tunnels and caves, they noticed something different about one particular tunnel as they made their way through, the surfaces on either side of them began to sparkle, and as they walked, they noticed the rocky walls were dotted with small shining amounts of crystal that grew denser the further along they went.

As they went deeper in, their eyes were drawn to the most beautiful sight. A vast cavern, illuminated by a single beam of light from a gap in the ceiling and reflecting on a still pool of clear water. Beautiful formations of quartz and amethyst grew from the surfaces of the cavern and glittered all around them.

“Elë…” Neldoriel spoke reverently, her soft voice echoing through the cavern as she turned around slowly, taking it all in.

Moved by the ethereal beauty of this place, she came to sit by the water’s edge. Silent as a shadow, Adar came to sit beside her, also in awe of the cavern’s purity. She looked at him with tears in her eyes, overwhelmed with emotion.

“I’ve never seen anything like this in all my life. It’s otherworldly, as if it were fashioned by Aulë himself,” she murmured.

Lightly she traced her fingers along a delicate cluster of amethyst. “The amethyst, it’s wonderful, it’s always been my favourite colour.”

Adar smiled at her lovingly, remembering how she looked in her pale lavender dress she wore at the river.

“It is a beautiful colour, one that suits you well,” he said thoughtfully. 

 

They sat for a while in silence in this ancient and mysterious place, the only sound to be heard was the gentle dripping of water from the ceiling of the cavern into the crystalline pool.

“I think this will work.” Adar observed after a while.

Neldoriel looked around at the vast amount of crystals all around them. “Will the Uruks be safe from Dwarves here? If they were to learn of such a place…”

“A legitimate concern, but we need not fear, we are not in Dwarven lands. And the Uruk are fierce and strong, they can defend their own.” Adar replied confidently.

Neldoriel nodded in understanding. 

“We will return to the forest and see what the Uruks wish to do, they are free people and can choose where they want to make their home. Though I think these caves and surrounding woodland will be desirable to them, here they will have ample protection from the sun, and shelter from the elements. They will be safe here.” Adar was happy that they had discovered a good new home for his beloved Uruk children. 

 

 

*****

 

 

A few years passed in peace. The Uruks had been happy to move into their new home in the mountainside caverns, and there they were thriving, the Elves did indeed teach them to be self sufficient. Adar’s children learned to grow and tend to plants, and raise animals for food, hidden within the woods and caves. The Uruks were safe there, free to raise their families without persecution. 

Adar was fully healed now from his wounds, and he and Neldoriel frequently made the short journey past the lake and through the forest to the Uruk caves. And likewise, some of the Uruks would come to visit, and to help with rebuilding the woodland cabin. Their home was whole again, and beautiful. Adar and Neldoriel, true to their Noldor heritage, were very good at creating beautiful things and had made it their own.

 

One morning they were sitting by the stream beyond their cabin home, at peace with their lives, although Adar still had something weighing on his mind.

“So much has changed, Neldoriel. It’s been a long time since those dark days, yet I still cannot help but feel so much guilt for what happened to Eregion at my hands. If the Elves were ever to find me, I dare not imagine what they would do. I do not know if we can ever fully be at peace, unless I can be forgiven.”

“Adar, what are you saying?….”

“I think I need to go to Lindon, to make things right, to pursue the forgiveness I had once hoped for, long ago.”

“It is too dangerous, you could be killed. I nearly lost you once, I can’t risk losing you again,” she said with worry in her voice. 

“I know, my lady, and I am sorry to put you through yet more uncertainty, but if I succeed, we can truly be free.”

Deep down she knew this to be true.

“You cannot go alone. I will come, and I will always support you, no matter what,” she said with love and an inner strength.

“I know, my beloved. Thank you.” He said softly, putting his arm around her as they watched the stream flow gently before them, enjoying these final moments of peace before beginning this new journey.

 

 

Notes: Elë is an exclamation of wonder, meaning, ‘behold.’

Chapter 25: Lindon

 

 

Lindon, the great Elven realm of Middle Earth. It had been many years since Neldoriel had last been here, and it was just as beautiful as she remembered. Sprawling golden forests and towering mountains, with waterfalls that cascaded into the surrounding sea. In the distance they could see the beautiful Elven buildings made from pale stone built among the trees and cliff face. The coastal wind coming in from the ocean gently moved through the trees, rippling through their yellow-gold leaves and making them dance in the invigorating breeze. 

She felt so at peace here, almost as if the trees were welcoming her home, like long lost family. Though her joy was mixed with anxiety for her beloved, she was worried for him, conscious of his feelings and the potential danger they could be putting him in. Riding closely beside him, she watched him as he took it all in and praying that this was all going to go well.

 

“We are nearly there. I can only hope we remain unnoticed until the right time,” Neldoriel said quietly. “It has been many years since I have visited Lindon, but I’m not a stranger here, my arrival will be hardly be noticed. If we can just find Galadriel, and talk to her, she might sympathise with us and help us plead our case to Gil-galad. I fear she is the only one who will listen.”

“I believe you are right, though I cannot enter, my presence would draw attention and our venture will fail. You must go on without me.” Adar said with a serious expression.

Neldoriel looked worried. “I cannot leave you here, alone. What if something happens?….” 

“I will remain in the shadows, as I have always done. I will be safe,” he said softly, holding her face in his hand and touching his forehead to hers.

She nodded tearfully, knowing there was no other way, she set off with haste towards the Elven kingdom, anxious to find Galadriel before somebody found Adar. 

 

It was only a short ride there. Dismounting her horse, she walked through the woodland realm. She passed through beautifully made dwellings, elegant Elven architecture nestled amongst the trees, bathed in the warm golden light of the sun, while the Elves went about their daily business.

As she walked across a small bridge that went over a stream, Neldoriel squinted her eyes as she spotted a familiar face in the distance. A Sindarin woman with dark brown hair and delicate features.

“Neldoriel, is that you?” The Elf asked quizzically.

“Aureleth! It’s good to see you, It’s been a long time.” The two Elves met in an a warm embrace, glad to see each other after such a long time.

“Likewise, it has been far too long. What has it been? Over a century I think. Will you join me for dinner and we can catch up?” Aureleth asked enthusiastically.

“I am sorry. I would love to, truly. But I do have some quite pressing matters to attend to.” Neldoriel felt bad for having to turn down her old friend, but time was of the essence.

“Of course, another time perhaps. I hope you will be staying in Lindon for a while?”

“I am not sure yet. Perhaps you can help me, I don’t suppose you know if Galadriel is here?”

“Galadriel? I believe so, she was last seen up near the courtyard of the Great Tree,” the dark haired Elf replied curiously.

“Thank you, friend. I must hurry, but I hope to see you again soon.” 

“Námarië, Neldoriel,” said Aureleth, giving a polite bow and wondering what this urgent business was. And hoping that it would not be such a long farewell this time, she was determined to see her friend again soon and not let another century go by.

 

Neldoriel hurried along through the trees, the golden leaves rustling under her feet as she made her way to the place she hoped she might find Galadriel, along winding paths and up stairways of stone, until she came to an elegant building among the yellow-gold trees, with intricate and delicate archways, and climbing ivy growing up its stone walls and pillars. 

And there in all its glory, the Great Tree of Lindon, its majestic golden branches gleaming in the light of the sun. Neldoriel came closer to the tree, gazing up in wonder as the ocean wind gently moved through the leaves, creating a soft whispering sound as the branches gently swayed in the breeze. Closing her eyes and inhaling deeply, she stood in reverence of this sacred and peaceful place. 

The silence was broken by the sound of soft footsteps approaching from behind.

“Neldoriel. I did not expect to see you here,” said Galadriel quietly. She was dressed in an elegant turquoise gown, and she looked rather serene and graceful compared to the last time they met.

Neldoriel bowed respectfully. “Lady Galadriel, I have come seeking you out, I need to speak with you.” 

“I am listening,” Galadriel replied, with a look of sadness. She had been there when the attack had been launched on Adar, and her heart was grieved for Neldoriel. She assumed the poor Elf wanted to know more about what happened that day. 

“Can we talk somewhere more private?” Neldoriel asked.

Galadriel nodded, and together they left the dwelling place of the Elves and rode back out into the woods, Galadriel on her own white horse as Neldoriel rode along on Thalion.

“Neldoriel, I was there that day, I am sorry for what happened, and that I could not help him. I know you loved him. Truly, I am sorry for all of it.” Galadriel looked sorrowful as they rode on gently. She seemed to have more grace and less stubbornness and pride since they last met, Neldoriel thought.  Neldoriel halted her horse and dismounted, Galadriel did the same and they began to walk further into the woods.

 There was Adar, sitting silently and peacefully under the shade of a tree. His eyes were closed as he leaned against its trunk, the golden leaves gently fluttering down all around him. Galadriel squinted her eyes, almost not believing what she was seeing. 

“Is that… Adar? He lives?”

Adar looked up and rose to his feet, Neldoriel came to stand closely beside him, proudly and faithfully by his side, always. 

“How can this be?” Galadriel whispered in disbelief. “The Orcs, the attack… no one could have survived that.”

”Uruks.” Adar corrected with a slight smirk.

Gadadriel shook her head incredulously, but really, she was happy to see him alive and well.

”It was a miracle that he survived. Those wounds… I thought he was gone,” said Neldoriel. It pained her to think of it.

She continued to tell Galadriel how he had survived, how she had begged the Valar for his life, and cared for him in the seclusion of their secret woodland, about his spiritual healing and his receiving of the Valar’s forgiveness. 

Galadriel listened quietly, nodding her head occasionally.

“The healing power of your ring removed any darkness that was left in me. Although, I had been shown the light long before this,” Adar added, looking at Neldoriel with a loving smile. “As I told you that day, all I wish for is for peace, and forgiveness. I…..”

“Daro!” Two Elven guards appeared from among the trees. His face etched with apprehension, one of the Elves drew his sword. “You. What are you doing here, how are you alive?” 

“Îdh, maethor,” said Galadriel quietly.

“But, Commander Galadriel, it is he, the Moriondor. He should not be here, we must tell the High King at once.”

Adar’s expression was pained from hearing the term. In his heart this was no longer who he was, and it hurt to be reminded of what he had been for so long. 

“There is no need, I have the situation under control.”

The guard swallowed nervously before starting to walk resolutely in the direction of Lindon. “I’m sorry Commander, but I must.” 

Galadriel blocked his path. “You will do no such thing. Stand down, soldier.”

”I cannot. You shall have to cut me down if you wish to stop me. Let me pass.”

Galadriel sighed and stepped aside, watching on in frustration as the pair of guards began a swift march towards Lindon.

“I must get to Gil-galad first, and try to reason with him. I know you both speak truth, and can be trusted, yet I do not know if the High King will listen to me. I will do all I can.”

“Thank you, Galadriel.” Neldoriel replied softly. No ill feelings remained between the two Elves as time and maturity had closed the rift between them. 

“Stay here, and be on alert. If this does not go well, you must flee this place before it is too late. Keep your horses ready.” Galadriel warned them as she mounted her horse.

“And Adar, in case we do not meet again, I am sorry for the way I mistreated you and your Uruks in the past. It was wrong of me and I should have known better.”

“It is forgotten,” Adar said graciously as he took Neldoriel’s hand.

Galadriel nodded, and rode off into the distance, leaving them to wait apprehensively among the beautiful and peaceful golden woodlands.

 

***

 

A full day went by and the sun was beginning to lower in the sky. Eventually a messenger came from Galadriel to tell them that they were summoned to the Great Tree for an audience before the High King. 

Nervously, Neldoriel took Adar’s hand and he drew the hood of his black cloak up over his head as they set off on their way. Neldoriel led them up a remote way, off the usual trails so that they wouldn’t draw unwanted attention. 

 

They arrived at the Great Tree, where Gil-galad and Galadriel were standing. The High King was dressed in fine golden robes, his regal presence commanding respect as he watched over his domain.

Neldoriel held Adar’s hand a little tighter as they approached. If she was feeling this nervous, how must he be feeling? If Adar was worried, he didn’t show it. As always, he moved with grace and elegance, not revealing his true emotions. Showing the correct etiquette to the king, Adar lowered his hood and bowed respectfully, Neldoriel swiftly mirroring him.

Gil-galad surveyed the pair of them for a moment, then his gaze fixed upon Adar alone.

“Adar.” The High King spoke in an icy tone. The memories of Eregion were still fresh in his mind even though a long time had passed since the siege.

“Galadriel tells me that you have come to my realm seeking forgiveness. There is much to forgive, you have committed many heinous crimes. Greatest of these is the destruction of our great city in Eregion, and the Southlands. Do you think these things are forgivable? I should have you killed where you stand.”

Adar looked at the ground, his eyes shining with tears as he recalled it all, Neldoriel could feel his hand shaking slightly as he held onto hers a little tighter. Outwardly he was hiding it but she knew that inside, his heart was breaking. 

“It is true. Simple words cannot undo the damage that I have done. But from the depths of my soul, I am sorry.” His voice was hoarse as he spoke, barely concealing his emotions.

“You could have stayed hidden, we all presumed you were dead. Yet you have come here to try and make amends, at the risk of your own life.” The High King was thinking aloud, interested in this change within Adar. “Galadriel has spoken for you, and is in support of letting you be. What am I to make of this?”

Neldoriel stepped forward, bowing low before beginning to plead Adar’s case. ”High King, I ask your permission to speak.”

Gil-galad regarded her critically. This young Elven woman was unknown and unremarkable to him, though he did recognise the look of the Noldor in her features. “Tell me your name, nissë, who are you?”

“I am Neldoriel, my parents came to Middle-Earth during the Exile. They are no longer here, but I remained. 
When I met Adar, I saw something within him, a gentle, tormented spirit trapped in darkness. Even after all Morgoth did to him, the torture he was put through, the light within him never went out, it just needed to be brought back out.”

Gil-galad listened, considering her words. “Continue.”

“I know the things he did cannot be taken back, and my heart grieves for the loss of Ost-in-Edhil and the Southlands as much as yours. They were acts born of desperation, to try to save the Uruks from becoming Sauron’s slaves.”

Gil-galad’s eyes flashed with anger at the mention of the Uruk. “Those creatures, they are an abomination, their lives are not worthy of the beautiful lands that we have lost in their name. They care for nothing, and have no respect for life, see how easily they turned upon their own leader? They should not be allowed to live.”

Neldoriel gave Adar’s arm a gentle squeeze, begging him mentally to not retaliate. ”Not all. They do care for life, they have families of their own, they can feel love and pain just as we do. Over time I have learned their ways and got to know them, they aren’t all like the ones that fell to Sauron, there is goodness even within the Uruks. They can be a little rough around the edges, but each one has their own personality, they have treated me with kindness. There is good and bad within all people.”

”Hmph. Well in the case of the Orcs, I have only ever seen the bad. You mean to tell me that all has been forgiven after turning on their father?”

“No, the ones turned by Sauron are presumably still under his control, or dead. There were only a small amount of good children that remained. They are far away from here, and they are peaceful.”

Gil-galad had a look of disdain, but held his tongue for now. “So, I am to believe that Orcs can live peacefully. And what of their leader who once waged war against us?”

“When I found him, as he lay dying on the forest floor, I cried out to the Valar. I begged them to spare him. And before that, I met an Ent, who told me to have faith. I do not know why, but they decided to save him. And from then on, we have lived in solitude and peace. He is the father of the Uruk yes, but he is also an Elf like you and I, he always has been. He has atoned for his past in the Halls of Awaiting.”

She looked at Adar, her eyes searching his, wordlessly asking permission to continue. Adar nodded in return.

“He is our kin, from the great city of Eldamar in Aman, born during the Years of the Trees. His true name is Elarion, son of Elarwë, his family were of a noble house, and he is among the eldest of the Eldar. He didn’t want any of what happened to him. I beg you, High King. All he wants is to live in peace, we will stay in exile, you will never see us again.” She begged, her eyes filled with tears.

 

As Neldoriel spoke, Adar found himself looking at the Great Tree, truly seeing it for the first time. He felt comforted in its presence and he was calm and at peace as he awaited his judgment. He closed his eyes and felt the warmth of the afternoon sun on his face as the light filtered through the golden leaves.

It was clear to see that despite his scars, there was light within him. He was an Elf, one of their own, one who had been trapped in darkness for so long. 

 

“High King, I saw it with my own eyes. He is no threat to us any more. Before the attack by Sauron, he wanted peace. Even before the intercession of the Valar, any trace of Morgoth’s corruption within him was vanquished when he wore Nenya” Galadriel spoke quietly. “If the Valar have forgiven him, so can we.” 

Gil-galad sighed. “I will trust your judgement, Galadriel. You have shown wisdom of late, Commander. And you, young Elf. You have shown more purity and grace than any of us present. Your boldness and devotion to this fallen Elf has given me pause. I have a lot to consider.”

An untold amount of time passed in silence, the atmosphere was ethereal as the soft wind blew all around them, gently whipping through their hair and Elven robes while the golden light of the sun shone down in rays through the trees, illuminating the woodland courtyard with a warm glow.

 

“The past has shown us that hatred and vengeance brings only sorrow. The will of the Valar must be taken into account, and your noble lineage. I herby pardon you, Elarion of Tirion. You may go and live out your days in peace. No harm will come to you.” Gil-galad finally gave his answer after much reflection.

Adar’s eyes met with the High King’s in disbelief, and he bowed respectfully. “High King, thank you….” Adars voice was raspy, and he was speechless.

Neldoriel did her best to remain serene and graceful, despite wanting to leap for joy.“Thank you, High King.” Neldoriel answered reverently. “We will be no bother, we will leave Lindon and….”

Gil-galad interrupted her.

“You do not have to leave. You may stay if you wish. The past cannot be erased, we have shown mercy, but do not mistake this for friendship. Your presence may be met with mistrust from the people, though in time, through continued repentance and good deeds, the wounds of the past may heal. Go now from my sight, before I change my mind.” Gil-galad was tired, and had other things that required his attention.  

Thanking the High King once again, they bowed in gratitude and began to leave. Neldoriel had a lightness in her step and in passing she gave a grateful look to Galadriel, who had a slight smile on her face as she watched the two of them leave. Hand in hand, they joyfully made their way down the stone steps, and back out into the golden forests of the beautiful Elven realm.

 

Notes:

 

Daro means ‘halt’ in Sindarin 

Îdh means, peace in Sindarin 

Maethor means ‘warrior’ in Sindarin

Nissë means ‘woman’ in Quenya

 

Chapter 26: Sinya Yesta

 

 

Adar and Neldoriel stayed for a few days in a small and quiet spot on the edge of Lindon at a high point near a waterfall, overlooking the golden trees and stone buildings. They ventured into Lindon again, it had been such a long time since Adar had been among the Elves and they weren’t in a hurry to rush home just yet. They made their visits very early in the mornings or later in the evenings, and kept to themselves. When they did on occasion cross paths with fellow Elves, they were met with a mixture of politeness and hesitancy. While they were becoming accustomed to Adar being around, it would take time before they would be able to trust him. 

Late one afternoon they wandered along cobbled stony paths among yellow gold trees, a gentle breeze blew through the leaves, causing them to flutter down around the two of them as they walked. Adar wore a dark robe over his usual armour. He drew his hood over his head, wary still about being among the Elves like this. Neldoriel took his hand reassuringly. Before leaving for home, Adar wanted to see the Great tree again, just the two of them this time.

“This has all been a lot to take in, hasn’t it?” Neldoriel asked quietly as they walked.

“Yes, it has. I must admit, I’m not used to this, it’s been a long time.” Adar answered thoughtfully.

“I know. And I’m proud of you, meleth nin, and all you’ve overcome. After this, let’s go home. We can visit again, but for now, we should get back to the Uruks.”

Adar nodded in agreement as they carried on walking in the direction of the Tree.

 

 

The courtyard was empty, the only sound to be heard was the soft singing of birds and the sound of the golden branches of the Great Tree softly blowing in the wind as the afternoon sunlight filtered through its leaves. They stood together under its great canopy, in awe of its majestic presence and beauty. 

“I never thought I would see this day,” Adar whispered almost inaudibly.

Neldoriel listened quietly and supportively as he continued.

“I spent so many years in darkness. I thought being here in this place, looking upon the Tree was nothing more than yet another lost dream. That my days as an Elf were over forever.” His eyes shone bright with deep emotion as he looked up at the Tree. “So much has changed.”

Silently, Neldoriel came to stand closely beside him, and slid her arm around him lovingly. There were no words in this moment. They went to sit by the edge of the cliff, comforted by the calming presence of the Tree and the waves from the sea in the distance. Seabirds called to one another while gliding through the sky as the sun began to set.

“Those dark days are long behind you, Adar. You are free now.” Neldoriel said quietly.

Taking her into his arms, he held her closely against him, he would treasure their love until the end of time. As sun went down, the sky was painted with soft pastel shades of pink and purple as the burnt orange sun slowly disappeared beyond the sea. They cherished this moment, never wanting it to end as they listened to the waves gently crashing against the cliff face.

 

***

 

The next morning, they were readying themselves to leave and return home, it had been wonderful spending time in Lindon and for Adar to begin reconnecting with his Elven side, but he also wanted to return to the Uruks. 

They gathered their things and were loading them onto the horses, when at once they were alerted to a presence coming from the woods. A figure appeared from among the trees, her feet light as a feather as she stepped gracefully through the fallen leaves on the ground.

“Neldoriel,” The brown haired Elf smiled. “I was just going for a walk, I’m hoping to go and gather the last of this year’s blackberries, I’m glad to have bumped into you though.” She looked over to the horses. “You’re leaving so soon?” 

“Aureleth,” Neldoriel replied happily. “Yes, it is time for us to go home. We will return, but for now, this has been long enough in civilisation. I’m ready to go back out into the wild.”

“That sounds about right for you!” Aureleth chuckled. “Where is home for you these days?”

”Oh, you know me, out in the woods somewhere, far away…” Neldoriel answered vaguely.

Aureleth shook her head, rolling her hazel eyes playfully. “And your mysterious friend. I was wondering when we would meet.”

“Oh, I’m sorry! Aureleth, this is A…”

“Elarion. It is my pleasure to meet you.” Adar cut in, with his soft yet gravelly voice, stepping forward gracefully and dipping his head in greeting.

Aureleth looked at him, fully taking him in. She had never seen anyone like him, so unmistakably Elven, yet dark, and scarred.

On the outside, Adar exuded confidence and grace, a mask to cover his feelings. But inside, he was anxious. Neldoriel, in tune with him and knowing him so well, knew his true emotions.

“I am pleased to meet you, Elarion.” Aureleth said warmly, and with no trace of judgment.

Adar nodded his head politely in reply, feeling relief at being received with kindness.

“I’m sorry our conversation ended so abruptly last time Aureleth. I hope you are well, and Estelion too,” said Neldoriel. 

“Thank you, we are alright, my husband and I now make our home here in Lindon.”

Neldoriel nodded, remembering their house in Eregion that she had stayed in before. And now it was no more. 

“I’m sorry for what happened your home, but I’m glad you both managed to get away. I was so worried, I hoped that you would be able to get to safety.”

“We and some others fled the city during the siege, when we had no hope left that the city would hold.” Said Aureleth.

Adar, who had been listening quietly, spoke in almost a whisper. “The other Elves… they must hate me for what I did.”

Aureleth regarded him, noticing the regret that was written all over his face. “Hate is a strong word, but some do feel resentment towards you.”

“I will be forever remorseful of the destruction wrought by my hand. I may have to spend the rest of my life proving it, before they believe me,” he said with resignation.

Aureleth shook we head. “Not all of us feel that way. Estelion saw first hand the dark powers of Sauron, after what happened to poor Celebrimbor. I have heard the story of your life, Elarion. And I wonder, if any of us we were put in your position, could we do any better?” She paused for a moment, deep in thought, watching the trees as they swayed gently in the breeze. “The others will come round, one day.”

Adar simply nodded, wishing for this to be true, but unsure. 

“Thank you my friend. Your kindness and grace means a lot. A lot has happened, all we want now is to live in peace and safety in our home in the woods.” Added Neldoriel.

”You two are well suited, I’m happy to finally see you happy and settled, Neldoriel.”

Neldoriel looked at the ground, smiling shyly. “Thank you, I’ve never been so happy.”

The two old friends continued to chat for a little while longer, as Neldoriel told the story of how she met Adar, and reminiscing on old times. Adar politely left them to talk, he didn’t want to deprive his beloved of time with her friend. Eventually though, it was time to leave.

“Don’t leave it a century this time before visiting,” Aureleth joked. “You are both welcome in our home any time. Elarion, perhaps next time you can meet my husband, Estelion. I’m sorry you missed him this time, he’s in the Havens right now, working at the forge.”

Aureleth’s eyes strayed to Adar’s armour that was visible under his black robe. As the wife of a smith, she was drawn to finely made things. “That is beautiful armour. From the First Age, no doubt.” Seeing its tattered state, she added, “what happened to it?” 

Adar looked downwards at the ground, saddened. “It has been through a lot, but it has survived all these years, just as I have.”

Aureleth felt compassion for this Elf that meant so much to her dear friend, it was clear he had been through a lot. “My husband would be glad to repair it for you, if you’d like. Estelion is one of the finest smiths in Lindon, he used to work with Celebrimbor.”

Adar looked up, taken aback. He looked over at Neldoriel who smiled at him encouragingly.

“You don’t need to make a decision now, but the offer is there.” Aureleth said kindly.

“Thank you.” Adar said quietly.

“Thank you Aureleth, you are too kind.” Neldoriel added. 

“That’s what friends are for.” Aureleth replied happily. “I will let you two be on your way, I need to go and find these blackberries. You know where I am if you ever need me.” Giving a little wave, she went off on her way through the trees.

 

In the peacefulness of the golden forest, Adar looked up at the trees as their branches gently swayed, their leaves rusting softly in the wind.

“Being here in Lindon, using my old name, it is… strange.” Adar mused.

“I understand, meleth nin. And I hope you are alright and it hasn’t all been too much.”

”You are as caring as ever, vanimelda,” Adar said quietly, taking her face in his hand and looking down at her with softness in his eyes. “It has all gone so much better than I could ever have hoped for. Your friend has been very kind, it was unexpected.”

“She has a good heart, and a gentle spirit,” Neldoriel said softly. “I noticed you corrected me when I was about to introduce you as Adar to Aureleth.”

Adar nodded. “I think it is best. To many of the Elves here, Adar is a name that many may see as a reminder of my past, and everything I’ve done. Perhaps it is wise for me to embrace my father-name while we are in the Elven realm.” He said with a look of uncertainty. This was all so new to him.

Neldoriel smiled, it warmed her heart to see him slowly starting to accept being known by this name too, as she knew that he once thought it to be a meaningless name. As much as she loved Elarion, she would still also always know him as Adar. Adar was his epessë, his chosen name, and it held so much significance to him. His Uruks would always be a part of who he was, no matter what. And now, it was finally time to return to them. 

Notes:

Sinya yesta translates to ‘new beginning’ in Quenya.

Chapter 27: Erumë

 

A light breeze whipped through their hair as Adar and Neldoriel made their way through the beautiful and peaceful trees of Lindon, the golden leaves fluttering all around them, carried by the wind. 
Adar led the way as they began their journey home. But after a while Neldoriel noticed that the direction he was taking was not the usual way.

“Adar, we are taking the wrong path, home is that way.” Neldoriel said, looking in the direction of home.

“You are right. I thought that perhaps we could make a detour before going straight back.”

“You know I love going on an adventure,” Neldoriel said cheerfully, astride her grey stallion. “But why, and where are we going?”

Adar patted the neck of his own black mare as he answered. “Would you like to pay a visit to an old friend? One we left behind in Mordor.”

“The Warg! Oh the poor thing, and her babies. They will be long grown by now, if they still live, that is. I’ll never forget that day, where we sat together under the old oak tree.” Neldoriel said, reminiscing on the time they journeyed together to the outer boundaries of Mordor, where the Warg had fled to be with her puppies. 

Adar nodded. “Yes. It’s been on my mind for a while, wondering if that one survived. If she did, then perhaps we can bring her back with us, for extra protection for the Uruks. And for us, in case unwelcome company ever comes poking around where they don’t belong,” he added with a wicked smile, spurring Rána on and trotting on ahead.

Neldoriel grinned to herself, Adar still had some Uruk like tendencies. The darkness would always be a part of who he was, like shadows in a sunlit forest. They carried on riding until night fell, journeying on towards the lands once known as the Southlands, following the great river Anduin as they travelled through vast fields and forests.

 

A campfire crackled in the depths of a pine forest. As Neldoriel gazed into its flames, she was lost in thought, reminiscing on the past and how much her life had changed. Adar came to join her from the shadow of the pine trees. 

“What are you thinking about, vanimelda?” He asked, coming to sit with her. They cuddled closely together as the fire cracked and popped.

“I was just thinking about life before, and how things have changed. I used to do this all the time by myself, sleeping under the stars, wandering around from place to place. I was quite lonely at times. But now I have you, I’m not alone anymore, you have made me so happy, meleth nin.”

He looked at her, his eyes dark and piercing, yet kind and gentle as the firelight reflected in them. She looked up into his eyes, she loved him so much, he was so beautiful. His face was illuminated with a warm orange glow in the presence of the campfire and a strand of black hair fell idly across his face. 

Reaching up to gently brush the hair from his face, she touched her hand to his face, caressing it lovingly. In return, Adar placed his hand over hers, leaning down and kissing her softly. As they kissed, she pulled him towards her, until he was lying on top of her. Wordlessly and breathlessly she gazed into his eyes, wanting him. Adar kissed her deeply, as he worked to unlace her Elven riding dress, planting kisses over her body as he gently removed her clothing. It made her shudder with pleasure as he kissed her all over, exploring her body. She got up and began to free him from his armour, blushing as she gazed upon him. Taking her in his arms, he looked down at her with half lidded, smouldering eyes.

“You are so beautiful…” he whispered in a low and gravelly voice.

“I am yours. Adar… I need you.” She breathed, begging for him. 

Their bodies and souls were intertwined as one as she kissed him, running her fingers through his hair and down his back. The warm light from the fire caressing their skin as they gave themselves to each other with a fiery passion, long into the night.

Afterwards, they lay together under the stars, the campfire had died a while ago, and Adar held Neldoriel close against his body as she slept, safe and warm under blankets together. He kissed her head protectively and tucked a lock of red hair behind her pointed ear, as he drifted off into peaceful dreams.

 

***

 

After a few more days, they arrived at the borderlands of Mordor. Green grass started to turn brown and prickly, and the sky turned into a grey haze. It was slightly unnerving being back here after so long, and knowing these lands no longer belonged to Adar. 

“We should move quickly.” Neldoriel said, looking around warily. All of a sudden she longed to be at home, back in the safety of the golden woods.

“Do not fear, my lady. I know these lands. Come, it is this way.” He reassured her.

Neldoriel didn’t like bringing the horses into this place, but they needed to be swift. The trek to the Warg territory took a fraction of the time that it did last time on foot. Before long they arrived at the same rocky incline that she remembered from years ago. Leaving the horses at the bottom, they began to climb the rocky pass.

When they got to the top, it looked mostly as she remembered, except it now looked even more desolate. The longer the land had been without the sun’s light, the more the environment had deteriorated. Neldoriel looked around at the ground, looking for signs of recent Warg activity. It was hard to tell, there were some signs but she wasn’t sure. They searched around, and checked the cave where the mother Warg had hidden before, but with no success. They even climbed to the summit, the place that was once a small haven of life in the barren lands, only to be saddened to see that the majestic old oak tree had withered and died. 

“We were too late.” Neldoriel said sadly. 

“I did this.” Adar murmured. First the Southlands, then Eregion. Why have the Elves forgiven me? I don’t deserve it.”

For the first time in a long time, his heart was filled with sadness as he came to sit beneath the skeleton of the old tree, and gazed out over the desolate landscape.

Neldoriel came to sit beside him, cross legged on the dusty ground. 

“They have forgiven you because they have seen the light within you, as I did. What you did back then, you did because you and your Uruks were just trying to survive. You are safe now, and so are they, you will never have to live in darkness again.”

“Thank you, my love.” He said, smiling sadly at her. “I’m sorry this was a wasted journey.”

“We can wait a little longer, she may come.” She felt slightly safer in this familiar place, even though it was no longer as it once was. 

They stayed for a while, until deciding to give up and leave. It was such a long time ago and the Warg was probably no more. They couldn’t linger any longer so Neldoriel and Adar began to leave, making their way down the rocky slope. 

“At least we tried.” Neldoriel said, trying to be cheerful. “It would have been nice to see the old girl again.”

 

The sound of a stick snapping a little way ahead stopped them both in their tracks and they stood still, listening. The atmosphere seemed to change and there was a disconcerting presence up ahead. From among the rocks, figures began to slowly emerge. As they came closer, it was clear to see that it was a pack of Wargs. Thin and malnourished, but still dangerous. They paced back and forward threateningly, their huge teeth bared at the intruders. Neldoriel stared wide eyed in fear, they did not expect their number to have grown this much.

One of the Wargs snapped its teeth and growled, a deep, menacing sound. Adar held out his gauntleted hand and in Black Speech, spoke to the Warg with an authoritative tone, commanding it to obey. It snarled at him in return. They did not know him. They were wild and savage, the only living creatures other than their own kind that they had ever encountered in this barren wasteland was prey, and these Wargs were starving. Adar cursed himself, it was foolish to come here. More Wargs emerged from the shadows, closing in on the pair of Elves. 

With a terrifying snarl, one of the Wargs rushed at Neldoriel with its great jaws open wide. Adar did not hesitate, in one fluid motion he drew his dark and ancient sword, and moved swiftly towards the beast, bringing down the blade heavily and taking its head clean off. Standing in front of Neldoriel protectively, he held his sword at the ready, awaiting another attack. Neldoriel nervously drew her own sword in preparation.

The Wargs continued to circle and snarl, enraged. Pacing up and down, ready to attack again at any moment. Another launched itself forward, this time going for Adar. With great strength he took it down, but as he did, more joined in the attack. It was a flurry of teeth and metal as Adar held them off. 

Neldoriel swiftly leapt to one side as one flew at her, she dodged it and delivered a strike with her light blade, causing it to howl in pain and fury. It leapt at her again and again, and each time she managed to avoid it, but only just. She wasn’t an experienced warrior like Adar. With a second stroke of her sword, she delivered another blow, stunning the Warg so she could get away. 

“Run.” Adar growled, taking her hand as they fled. Tearing down the rocky pass, they tried to escape, leaping over rocks and boulders as they went. 

“They won’t give up!” Neldoriel panted as they ran. She could feel the Wargs closing in on them. Drawing her bow, she spun around, and quickly taking aim, loosed her arrow, taking one down with a direct hit to the heart. Swiftly drawing again, another Warg fell to the ground, with an arrow through its eye. 

The rest of the pack faltered, then turned and ran, but one stubborn beast remained. A huge, vicious creature. Adar and Neldoriel held their ground. From the rocky cliff face behind them they heard another low growl. Another Warg was coming from behind the rocks, they were going to be surrounded. From the shadows it appeared, stalking forward menacingly. Grey around its face, and rather haggard looking, this Warg was old. The growling ceased and it regarded Adar and Neldoriel.

“It’s her.” Neldoriel whispered.

The Warg remembered her old master, and Neldoriel, who had offered her food and been kind to her.

Taking the opportunity while the Elves were distracted, the remaining Warg launched forward. The old one flew at the attacker, instinctively protecting her master, as she was bred to do back in the days of the Uruk camps. The two Wargs slammed together, rolling around on the ground, a tangle of fur and teeth as they tore into one another. The younger Warg was stronger, but its elder was experienced. Vicious snarls erupted from the Wargs as they continued to fight, neither backing down. Neldoriel gasped as the younger, stronger Warg got the old one by the throat, pinning her down and tearing into her. With precision, Adar rushed in and ran his sword through the heart of the feral Warg and its body fell to the ground.

The old Warg whimpered as she lay on the ground, unable to get up and Neldoriel came to kneel on the ground beside her. “You saved us.” She said with tears in her eyes. Blood stained the ground where the Warg lay, bleeding out from the fatal wound to her throat. 

Neldoriel ran her fingers through the Warg’s coarse fur. “Shhhh….. we are here.” She murmured, stroking the poor creature’s neck as she lay dying.

Adar came over and placed his hand on the Wargs head, comforting her. “Thank you,” he whispered and the Warg closed her eyes as her life slipped away.

Neldoriel looked at Adar as a tear fell down her face. “The poor old thing, we came to save her, and we got her killed instead. This was all for nothing.”

From amongst the rocks, small noises could be heard.

“Not for nothing.” Adar said quietly.

Leaving the body of the old Warg, Adar and Neldoriel got up and moved towards the direction of the noises. Through rocks and undergrowth they made their way through, and there hiding under some thorny, dead bushes, were four small, terrified Warg pups. Neldoriel’s heart broke at the sight of them. Their mother had been killed in the fight.

Gently, Adar picked them up one by one, giving two of them to Neldoriel. “We couldn’t save the old one, but we can save her grandchildren.”

They made their way back down the rocky trail, back to the horses, and left Mordor, never again to return. 

Notes:

Erumë is a Quenya word that means desert or wasteland.

Chapter 28: Vinya Coivië

They travelled day and night to get back home, riding through the depths of the wilderness tirelessly, until they could finally see the lake and the Uruk caves in the distance. 

A scout spotted them and ran over, it was Ozrad, the young Uruk that had retrieved Adar’s sword in the forest. 

“Lord-Father! You are finally back. And what’s this? Wargs?” the young Uruk asked enthusiastically, eying the furry bundles they were carrying with interest. 

“We took a detour on the way home, a rescue mission that partly failed.” Adar sighed. 

“Back to Mordor?” Ozrad asked with a grin on his face.

“Yes.” Adar furrowed his brow. “Don’t get any ideas,” he said sternly, knowing the young Uruk’s enjoyment of going out and looking for things. “I mean it, that’s an order.” He said seriously. Then he added in a gentler tone, it’s not safe, my son.”

“I understand, father,” said Ozrad solemnly.

Neldoriel spoke up. “Ozrad, perhaps you could run on ahead and let the others know we are coming with Wargs.”

Turning to Neldoriel, Ozrad was glad to help. “Yes, Lady-Mother, anything for you.” And off he went to tell the others.

Neldoriel paused, touched by the endearing name Ozrad had called her by. Adar smiled to himself as they carried on towards the caves.

 

 

Waiting to greet them at the entrance to the caves were a small group of Uruks, among them were Ozrad, Ûlfa, and her mate, Augdakh. Neldoriel noticed straight away that something looked different about Ûlfa, she was looking noticeably rounder around the stomach.

“Ûlfa! Neldoriel exclaimed, hopping down from her horse. “I think congratulations are required.” 

“Thank you, Elf Sister.” Ûlfa smiled in her usual Uruk way.

While Adar went off with some of the Uruks to go and settle the Wargs into their new home, Neldoriel spent quite some time with Ûlfa, excited to hear all about how she was getting on.

“I’m happy for you Ûlfa, a little Uruk on the way, it’s so exciting! I hope Augdakh is taking good care of you.”

“Yes. He looks after me well, he’s strong, and handsome. And a good hunter.”

“I’m glad to hear it, Ûlfa. You’ve been a good friend to me. And I’ll be there for you, always.”

 

Inside the caves, Adar made his way along the winding tunnels, carrying a single Warg pup in his arms. He was accompanied by Augdakh, who was large enough to carry two pups, one under each arm, and the smaller Ozrad who carried the remaining one. 

“Lord-father, I know a place we can keep the Wargs,” said Augdakh in his deep and gruff voice.

Adar nodded. “Lead the way.” Augdakh was one of his best Warg handlers, he knew what he was doing. 

The Warg pup trembled in Adar’s arms as they continued through the tunnel. Despite their ferocity, they were still animals, and these were just babies, that had lost their mother. Eventually they reached a light at the end of the tunnel, and it opened up into a huge area that was lit with torches. The ceiling of the cave was so high that it wasn’t even visible, the rough voices of the Uruks and the sounds of building and tinkering echoed through the cavern. There were the same ramshackle tents and dwellings here that the Uruks were so used to making. It was just like the camps, but sheltered from the suns rays that hurt them, and instead illuminated with the warm glow of the torches mounted to the rocky walls. Augdakh let them to a fenced off area used for storing vegetables, and plopped the pups in there for the time being.

“There is plenty of space here, Lord-Father, me and the boys will have a proper pen built for the Wargs in no time at all, ” Augdakh said, standing tall and confident. 

“There is still so much space here that we haven’t uncovered yet,” Added Ozrad with a curious look on his face that was so typical of the young Uruk, also putting his Warg into the vegetable storage.

Adar lifted up his Warg pup and brought it up to eye level. It looked at him, as if thinking for a moment, before licking him on the nose. “Thank you for that.” Adar said with light hearted sarcasm, placing the last pup down.

”How are you all getting on, my sons? Do you like it here?” Adar asked, wiping his nose. It was so important to him that his children were happy.

”It is a good place. It is safe, and feels like home,” Augdakh said simply.

Adar breathed an internal sigh of relief. This was all he ever wanted for them.

”There are lots of places to explore here. Lots of shiny rocks for me to add to my collection.” Ozrad was in his element. “Come, father, let me show you.” 

Adar gave a bemused smile as he followed the young Uruk up a steep rocky path. Ozrad growled at passing Uruks on the way, warning them to not even think about going near his things. They reached a smaller cave, lit by a single torch. It was just big enough for a bed and a chair, and a big pile of carefully placed objects in the corner. 

“Do you like it, father?” Ozrad asked hopefully.

Adar stepped closer and scanned over the items, Helmets, animal skulls, tankards, plates, all sorts of trinkets pilfered on their travels. Was that a hair brush? Ozrad didn’t have hair. Adar shook his head with a quiet, bemused laugh. Next he spotted a pile of crystals and gemstones, glittering beautifully in the firelight. 

“The shiny rocks,” Ozrad said as he noticed Adar looking at them. “There’s lots of them here.”

Adar looked at the gemstones and at Ozrad thoughtfully. “You have been busy. It is a good collection, my son. Take good care of it.”

He was happy that Adar approved. ”I will, Lord-father!” 

Happy that the Uruks and Wargs were safe and settled, Adar and Neldoriel reunited outside, they were exhausted. Mounting their horses, they rode home to their little cabin in the woods for some much needed rest.

 

***

 

Time passed peacefully in the golden woods and Neldoriel and Adar had settled into a safe and happy life. Their little house was fully restored now, and even improved upon. They had taken the large bedroom, and made it their own. Warm rays of sunlight poured in from the double doors that led out to the balcony as they lay together one lazy morning, neither one in a hurry to leave each other’s arms. Adar appeared to be lost in thought, gently brushing his thumb up and down over Neldoriel’s bare shoulder as she lay in his arms, cuddled against him.

“What are you thinking about, meleth nin?”

“I was thinking about the Warg attack, and how badly it could have gone. I wonder Neldoriel. Your friend, Aureleth, wasn’t it? Perhaps I should take her up on her offer. My sword has seen better days, I know I could get new things, but…”

“I understand.” Neldoriel said softly. “We could go today, if you like.”

“I have some matters to attend to with the Uruks, you ride on ahead, and I will catch you up.” Adar said mysteriously. 

Neldoriel looked at him curiously, but didn’t question him. He was an ancient and powerful Elf, and she respected him as well as loved him. These lands were safe and she was sure they had nothing to fear.

Later that day, with Adar’s sword and armour wrapped and bundled onto her horse, she departed for Lindon. Neldoriel closed her eyes, breathing in the crisp morning air as she looked out across the grasslands. A strong wind whipped up behind her, blowing through her hair and cloak, while Thalion snorted and pawed the ground in excitement.

“Oh, impatient are we?” Neldoriel chuckled. “Lenna!” She said spiritedly, and the horse set off at a gallop. Neldoriel laughed, Thalion’s enthusiasm was infectious. Joyfully they raced across the plains and through the forests towards Lindon. Although she missed Adar, and wished that he was riding alongside her, she was happy to be doing this for him, she couldn’t wait to get his things restored for him, the thought of bringing him happiness made her heart soar as she galloped through the wilds on the back of her beloved horse, the wind carrying them as they went.

 

 

Neldoriel sat alone beneath the Great Tree, listening to the sound of the whispering leaves. A gentle breeze from the ocean caressed her face as she looked out over the sea, its waves eternally undulating across the vast blue horizon. She had ridden to Lindon so swiftly that she had spent a couple of days in the Elven realm, waiting for Adar to join her.

“Beautiful.” Came a soft, yet gravelly voice from behind her.

Turning around, she saw him. Like a shadow he gracefully emerged from among the trees, the wind gently blowing through his silky black hair as the golden leaves gently fluttered down around him.

“Adar!” She softly exclaimed, running to him. He caught her in his arms, holding her lovingly as he looked down at her with his intense and beautiful eyes that reminded her of the ocean she had just been gazing upon. Taking her face in his scarred, yet soft hands, they kissed as the leaves continued to fall all around them.

“I’m sorry I kept you waiting, my lady.” Adar said worriedly.

It’s alright, meleth nin. I missed you. But I have been fine, I spent some time with Aureleth, I finally relented and joined her for that dinner she has been wanting me to come to for the last decade.” Neldoriel chuckled softly. She told me that your things will be ready in a day or two, and to meet them at the forge in the Havens. I think it must be ready by now.”

“You have done so much for me, and you still do, all the time. Thank you, Vanimelda.” Adar said lovingly.

Finally reunited, they set off for Lindon’s capital.

 

 

 

Note: Lenna means ‘go’ in Sindarin.

 

Notes:

Vinya coivië translates to ‘New life’ in Quenya