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XxX
Phoenix fell back against her seat with a huff that sent her flyaways dancing around her face. Her body ached from the mission and her adrenaline was just beginning to ebb as the transport left the carrier. Her eyes wandered to the seat next to her where Bob quietly dozed.
She lingered, sorely tempted to reach over and brush his ruffled swoop aside. Her neck pricked and she cut her eyes across the aisle where Hangman was sitting with a grin only he could pull off. She rolled her eyes when he looked from Bob to her with a wag of his eyebrows and she shot up a single finger in response.
Even though she didn’t care what the hotshot pilot thought, Phoenix knew she had been caught and made sure to keep her eyes to herself for the duration of the flight. Instead, she let her thoughts wander, considering questions she hadn’t risked asking while in the throes of training.
If she was being honest, she had grown quite attached to her little shadow and she couldn’t figure out why. She had run countless missions with a rotating door of wizzos over the years and she had always taken care to keep everyone she worked with at arm’s length. After all, business and pleasure rarely mixed well.
But, something had changed this time. Something had happened between their exhausting training sessions and Mav selecting them for the final run.
Though, maybe it wasn’t something so much as someone.
The last few weeks had been brutal, and Bob had shown himself to be an easy target when it came to hazing, a fact the guys used to their full advantage. Why they kept at it was beyond Phoenix, since Bob never gave rise to their antics, but that might have been why. They wanted to see just how far they could push Bob before he pushed back.
Phoenix had realized early on that very few things would rattle him. The only time she ever saw Bob reach his limit was when Hangman took a cheep dig at her; Bob had taken up her defense without missing a beat and held the line ever since.
Phoenix was used to Rooster or Payback having her back, but they had known each other since their Academy days and their comradely had been earned over the years, whereas Bob and her seemed to simply have an understanding from the moment they met, unspoken and unearned, and she hadn’t once questioned if he had her six. He just did. And, to know she had been the only reason he’d stood up to the guys these past few weeks, while letting them take all the shots they wanted at him, made her feel something she wasn’t quite sure what to name.
But, it had been impossible to get behind that mask of his.
Always composed and quiet, Bob was a wallflower in the truest sense. Everyone else had written him off as single-minded, a mousy little geek best left to his own devices, but it was easy for Phoenix to see that there was more there than met the eye.
Especially when he continued to surprise her. Not just with his little quips when they were sky-bound, but when he had refused to give-in when Vice Admiral Simpson had tried to get them to rat out Maverick after their crash or when he kept her company after the Admiral’s funeral long after everyone else had gone home because he somehow knew she didn’t want to be alone, or how he always knew exactly which drink she wanted after their grueling runs even though her tastes were constantly changing.
Of course, there had been a few times when the freedom of the F/A-18 loosened his mask enough for her to peer behind it, and she had managed to get some answers out of him after the funeral, but she still knew almost nothing about him. She had tried opening up to him in hopes that he might do the same, but, apart from learning that he had a little half-sister named Elsa and had grown up in Montana, he remained mum about his personal life. So, Phoenix took to watching him like he watched everyone else, hoping to find out whatever she could about her stoic wizzo who went unnoticed by most.
Phoenix had hoped she might be able to make some headway before they headed back to Lemoore. Both the Aces and the Eagles were stationed there, but it was one of the largest bases. She’d never run into Bob before this assignment, and she doubted she would after since their squads were constantly on the move in opposite directions. Her time was running out and she could feel the pressure building.
Phoenix rested her head against the seat, her eyes wandering out the window, and wishing Bob would wake up for her to give it one last shot.
XxX
Phoenix banged the suitcase loudly down the stairs behind her, smirking at the glares she received as she marched towards the lobby. By chance, she caught him out of the corner of her eye.
“Bob?” Her smile grew as she made her way over.
The wizzo hurried to sit up. He quickly wiped his nose and fixed his glasses, but his quiet smile wasn’t enough to hide behind. At least, not from her.
Her bliss instant gave way as she sat down on the table across from him. Phoenix watched him squirm under her gaze and she realized she’d have to ask if she wanted to know, “What’s wrong?”
“Um, I…” He tried to laugh it off but his jaw shifted, trying to cut off the tears before they could brim over, “My...my grandma had a heart attach a couple days ago, the day we left for the mission, actually.”
Her shoulders sunk and she reached for his hand, giving it a squeeze. Bob stared at their hands; his own digging in to his knee, desperately trying to maintain control, and her smaller, soft one holding on to his with as much resolve.
Finally, his mask gave way, “She’s ninety-five, so I shouldn’t be surprised, but part of me thought she’d outlive us all so it’s...it’s a lot.” He chuckled, using his free hand to brush back his hair, “She still works the family farm up in Montana, even at her age. Always going, always doing. She can outwork all the ranch hands even in the dead of summer. Every Christmas she hosted a big family get together...which I missed last year because...” He fidgeted with his phone some as he pushed back the second wave, “Elsa was with her at the time, she found her. I—I’m waiting on a call now, they said they sent her to some group home when they couldn’t get a hold of me.”
“What about your parents?”
Bob shook his head, “Our dad and Veronica—that’s Elsa’s mom—are in Europe, I think, or is it South America?”
Phoenix’s eyes grew. Bob was so precise and punctual, he had a color-coded schedule for the most asinine tasks, so the fact that he didn’t know about his family’s going-ons shocked her.
“It’s not like it would matter anyway,” His pain began cracking through in the form of anger, unable to contain his heartache any long, “They ship her off every summer and usually forget to pick her up until Christmas when they need her for their Kodak moments.” Bob stopped short but Phoenix could figure out the rest of the thought: just like they did with me. Bob gave a sigh, “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have said that.” He turned to her with a sincere smile, “You must have a plane to catch, I’m sorry for keeping you.”
“It’s fine.” Phoenix watched as Bob took his hand back, wishing he hadn’t, “I don’t mind.” She could feel her moment slipping away and her heart began to race, trying to chase after it.
His phone pinged, letting him know his lift was there, “Well, maybe I can make it up to you. Do you need a ride to the airport? I’m heading there now.”
“That would be great.” Phoenix stood up, but, before she could grab her suitcase, Bob had claimed the handle with a sweet smile. She smirked as she followed him out to the car. If Rooster had done that, she would have fought him for it, but, for once, she happily accepted the chivalry.
The drive was quiet, with Bob deep in thought as they drove along. Too soon, for both of them, the departures sign came into view.
“Which terminal are you heading for?” Bob asked.
“This one’s fine.” Phoenix answered, not sure how to explain that her flight was a red-eye that wasn’t leaving for another fifteen hours from a completely different airport.
Bob hopped out and made sure Phoenix was situated before he grabbed his own things and paid the driver. They shared a shy smile as they both headed in together.
Phoenix was so used to traveling alone that she had forgotten how fun it could be to travel with someone. She chuckled when Bob, who was one of the best wizzos to come out of TOP GUN, kept messing up the simple instructions of the TSA agent when he was getting scanned. They took their time afterwards and browsed the shops as they made their way towards his gate. Bob bought a small plush unicorn, a purple one after Phoenix had lobbied hard for it over the pink one, to surprise Elsa with.
When they reached the gate, Bob found them a corner to tuck into after Phoenix insisted on keeping him company since her plane left after his, which wasn’t a complete lie, and they spent the next hour talking about the beauty of the Big Sky state. Bob was like a little kid who had finally found someone interested in what he had to say, and Phoenix was happy to oblige.
“And the sunsets! You’ve never seen anything like them, just all the colors and how they reflect off the cliffs. You would love it.”
She settled back, just imagining it, “I bet I would.”
Bob let his eyes wander out the window as his plane taxied in and sighed, “Thank you for keeping me company, I’ll pay you back for the ticket.”
“W-what are you talking about?” Phoenix couldn’t meet his eye and felt her nerves starting to give her away. Typically, her poker face was solid, but it faltered this time. She worried her lower lip and that sealed her fate, “How’d you figure it out?” She winced. When they got to the airport, Phoenix knew she couldn’t get through TSA without a boarding pass, so she had snuck a peek over Bob’s shoulder when he checked in and bought one of the empty seats on his flight.
“I peeked, just like you peeked.” Bob grinned, his eyes filling with appreciation, “You didn’t have to do that, I would have been fine on my own.”
“Maybe I just wanted to see these oh-so-famous sunsets you’ve been going on about, hmm? Did ya think about that?” She bumped into him, sticking her tongue out playfully. Bob just chuckled.
The unloading went quick and soon they were calling for first class and military boarding. Bob started to get up but, before he could begin a “goodbye”, Phoenix had marched past him to join the line.
Never one to back down from a challenge, she threw a look over her shoulder, “Coming?”
Bob caught up to her in a few strides and, gently, took hold of her arm to pull her aside, “Natasha, you don’t need to—”
“If you didn’t want me coming, you shouldn’t have sold Montana so hard. Honestly, they should have you write the brochures! Besides, there’s nothing waiting for me at home but piles of laundry, which I am more than happy to put off a while longer.” Phoenix stepped up as the clerk scanned her ticket and thanked the other clerk as he checked her bag, “So, it looks like you’re stuck with me.” She looked more certain than she felt, waiting to see what he would do.
Bob conceded with a nod, his obvious relief instantly putting Phoenix at ease, and stepped up to scan his ticket. He wasn’t quite sure what to make of Natasha Trace, or why she had decided he was worth such trouble, but he was grateful for her company nonetheless.
XxX
Phoenix looked at her ticket for the first time, trying to find her seat, “23 C...well, at least it’s not a middle seat.” She quipped as she pulled off her backpack and tried to stuff it into the overhead.
Bob reached up and pushed it in, “Lucky you.”
She grimaced when she saw the bold “B” on his pass, “Ouch, back of the bus too.”
“Yeah, comfort wasn’t my main concern when I bought it.”
Phoenix slowly nodded, knowing how fried his brain must be between their mission and then finding out about his grandma, “It’s been a rough few days.” It finally hit Phoenix what she was doing. Of course, she had always been a spur-of-the-moment person – making decisions in the heat of the moment had always served her well, after all – but she realized right then and there that Bob hadn’t exactly invited her to come along. Not to mention that he was heading back for a serious family matter, emphasis on the family. What was she doing? Inwardly, she groaned, realizing she’d get to keep company with those thoughts for the next four hours instead of Bob.
“Excuse me, dears, I don’t mean to interrupt.” An older lady with a gentle face stood up from the middle seat of section 23, “But, would you like to trade me tickets, son?”
“No, it’s alright, ma’am.”
The woman chuckled as Phoenix threw a very pointed look in Bob’s direction.
“Dearie, a middle seat is a middle seat. Besides, I couldn’t live with myself if I separated you two lovebirds. It goes too fast, trust me.” Before Bob could argue further, she had tucked her ticket in his hand and taken his before tottering towards the back.
“T-thank you.” Bob finally managed and the lady offered a simple wave off her shoulder. Then it dawned on him what she had said and he stumbled around, “Oh, we’re not—”
Phoenix’s dramatic sigh as she fell into B cut him off, “Guess that means I should do my part and take the middle. Littler legs and all.”
“Natasha—”
“Don’t worry,” Phoenix winked, “You can owe me one.”
Bob offered his small smile as he stuffed his bag in next to hers and took his seat, “Fair enough.”
This time, as the plane took off, it was Phoenix’s turn to doze and she found herself a willing pillow.
Bob watched her peaceful face, feeling safe to do so away from the base. These past few weeks he had found himself in awe of the decorated pilot beside him. Phoenix was so bold and certain that he couldn’t help but bask in the brilliance that surrounded her; it was intoxicating. If truth be told, he had questioned their pairing in the beginning since her level of skill felt light years beyond his, but, as time went on, he had found a comfortable rhythm. They worked quite well together, pushing and pulling as they shared the load, and it had meant everything when Maverick had chosen them to make the run with him.
Early on, Bob had learned that it was easier to keep to himself so he didn’t bother anyone but, the last few weeks, he’d felt drawn to open up more and he found that he wasn’t looking forward to heading back to Lemoore and his former life. Though, he would have preferred that to finding out that Jean had a heart attack and little Elsa was all alone, thousands of miles away.
He took a shaky breath as he closed his eyes. I’m coming, he thought as hard as he could, hoping his little sister might feel it somehow.
Phoenix shifted and snuggled closer, which made him smile. It felt nice, not being on his own, and Bob settled in beside her, hoping to enjoy it for as long as he could.
XxX
Bob’s phone started pinging the instant airplane mode was turned off. His heart raced as he pulled up his voicemail and Phoenix kept close while giving him space.
“Hi, Bobbie, this is Aunt Lynette. I just wanted to let you know that I have Elsa and we’re back at the farm. I would have called you sooner, but I didn’t know you were Jean’s emergency contact for Elsa until today. Jean’s doing well, they just released her a couple hours ago and she’s settling in nicely. I’m not sure if you’re already heading up but I just wanted to let you know how things are going. I hope you’re doing well, sweetie, love you.”
Bob fell against the wall, relief washing over him.
“Good news, I take it?”
“Very!” He brushed back his tousled hair, letting his smile grow, “Jean’s back at the farm and so is Elsa!” He could scarcely believe his own words.
“Looks like all they’re missing is you.” Phoenix smiled, even though a piece of her held back. She wasn’t sure if it was because she knew she wasn’t needed any more, or if she was jealous because Bob had a big, happy family waiting for him.
The way Bob looked at her, it was almost like he saw her thoughts written on her face, and Phoenix shifted under his steady gaze, “We should get going before the traffic gets too bad.” Her face softened as Bob grinned, “The farm has the best sunsets, after all.”
“Count me in.” Phoenix beamed and the two headed for arrivals.
XxX
“Thanks!” Bob paid the driver and saw him off as Phoenix stood in awe of the 120 acre farm. Never in her life had she seen such a place; green and gold dressed the endless acreage, which was dotted with cattle and horses, while the breeze danced through the limbs of trees that had been witness to countless generations of Floyds.
Bob sneakily claimed her suitcase handle from her while Phoenix playfully rolled her eyes and sighed.
“You gotta learn that it’s okay to let others take care of you sometimes.” He said as they started up the stairs.
“Easier said than done.” Phoenix whispered to herself as she followed him up. Still, she smiled, realizing she might be able to get used to the idea if it was Bob doing the caring.
As they reached the screen door, remnants of a conversation drifted out.
“I am sorry, Jean, but I do not see how this is what is best for Elsa.”
“But I’m fit as a fiddle!”
“You just had a heart attack.”
“Well, I have Lynette close by—”
A tut and then, “She lives two hundred miles away.”
“And Bob is coming home. I’m sure we can work something out...”
“Your grandson is an active duty naval officer stationed in California, which pose a number of concerns. The first and foremost being that Lieutenant Floyd is a bachelor with you as his emergency contact. Neither of you have the appropriate support network to raise a six-year-old girl.”
“Please, you can’t take her.”
Bob’s brow knit and he looked at Phoenix, who was straining to hear more. She took a step forward and knocked into a flower pot, sending it crashing off the porch. She winced and mouthed a “sorry” as Bob led them inside where three women sat around the table.
“Oh, Bob!” One of the three, a much older woman who must have been Jean, held out her arms and Bob greeted her with a kiss on the cheek. The pair exchanged a look and Jean said, “Elsa’s bringing the horses in with Felix.” Bob nodded as Jean turned her bright blue eyes, a perfect matched to her grandson’s, to the newcomer, “Who’s this?” Her smile was sweet and inviting, and Phoenix instantly felt at ease.
“Oh, this is Natasha Trace. We flew my last mission together.” Bob quickly added at Jean’s pointed look.
Jean leaned into the woman who was her spitting image, only twenty years younger, and chuckled, “Talk about talking your work home with you…” Lynette was quite demure in her laugh as she batted at her sister.
“It’s nice to meet you.” Phoenix stepped up, falling into her training and made the rounds politely.
The third no-nonsense woman, it turned out, was one Ms. Petunia Johnson, a social worker with CPS. She looked down the bridge of her nose at the young Navy lieutenants, “As I was saying, I really must insist that Elsa return with me to the group home. I just do not see how this is an appropriate fit for her.”
“Why’s that?” Phoenix couldn’t help herself. The woman felt out of place, an intruder, and Phoenix’s first instinct would always be to protect.
Ms. Johnson narrowed her eyes, “Mrs. Floyd’s health is declining and Lieutenant Floyd,” She nodded to Bob, not even trying to hide her disdain, “Is not fit to be Elsa’s guardian as Mrs. Floyd suggested.”
Phoenix watched as Jean waved Bob away. It was obvious she was feeling embarrassed for even suggesting such a thing, but Bob was right there to assure her that it was alright.
“Why isn’t Bob fit to be Elsa’s guardian?” Phoenix narrowed her eyes, her chest beginning to heave as she turned back to the intruder, “He has a steady job and income, he’s kind and caring and thoughtful, and he’s the most responsible and organized adult I know. And no one loves that little girl more than he does!” So focused on the fight before her, she didn’t notice the admiration emanating from Bob, who now knew why she was called Phoenix. She shone brighter than anything he had ever seen and his heart swelled, never having had someone come to such a passionate defense for him before.
“Because, Ms. Trace, he lives over a thousand miles away with no one to assist in raising Ms. Floyd.”
Her fists flexed at her side, her eyes staring the social worker down, “He has me.”
“If you have not noticed, this is a private, family matter. Just who do you think you are, Ms. Trace?”
Phoenix could feel her victory slipping away so she went for the only ace she could find, a cheat though it was, “I’m Bob’s wife.”
Bob had learned pretty quickly how to follow Phoenix’s train of thought the last few weeks and so he was slightly less caught off than his grandmother and great-aunt when those three little words came out.
Phoenix’s dark eyes, lit with passion, looked at her wizzo. Bob knew he couldn’t leave her six exposed and he stepped up, “Natasha and I are on different deployment cycles and my contract is up next summer, I can retire at that point to look after Elsa.” It wasn’t a lie, but it sold her story enough.
Triumphantly, Phoenix turned back to the social worker, who looked like she’d swallowed an entire lemon.
“I will discuss this with my supervision and get back to you on Monday.” Ms. Johnson sniffed and, after a round of taut goodbyes, took her leave.
Once the door was safely shut, Jean’s joy burst and filled the entire house, “Oh, my dears!” She reached out a hand to each of them and pulled them close, “Oh, my dears!” She wasn’t sure if she was more thrilled that Bob had finally found his person or that Elsa’s future was secure.
Before they could say much more, a squeak of, “BOB!” rung throughout the house and a blur ran through and attached itself to Bob’s leg.
Bob chuckled as he hoisted Elsa up, “Ooof! There’s my princess!” He kissed her golden crown as she snuggled close with a giggle, “Hey, I brought you something.” Bob set her down and reached into his bag to pull out her present. Elsa’s big blue eyes lit up with delight when she saw the plush unicorn and she hugged the toy close.
Phoenix watched the little exchange, completely enthralled. She didn’t have much experience with kids since her nephews lived on the East coast and none of her friends had settled down yet, but she found herself captivated by the love this little family had for each other.
Bob rested his hand on top of Elsa’s head as she tucked herself against him; she had just realized they weren’t alone and her shyness had taken hold. She hugged his leg, practically hiding behind him, as Bob turned to Phoenix, “Elsa, this is Natasha.” Bob didn’t force Elsa to come out from the safety of his leg, but he wasn’t above bribery, “She helped me pick out your gift.”
Elsa chanced a peek out as Phoenix squatted down, “It’s nice to meet you, Elsa. I’ve heard a lot about you.” Phoenix smiled, not really expecting anything.
Tentatively, and after a couple looks at Bob, Elsa stepped out and offered her hand, which she let Phoenix barely shake before reclaiming Bob’s leg, “Your name’s pretty.”
“Thanks, yours is pretty, too.” Natasha’s arms hung over her knees, wondering what she should do. She wasn’t sure why, but it felt like so much hung on this single moment, almost as if it mattered more than anything else this entire trip would. Maybe it was because Elsa meant so much to Bob, or maybe it was because Phoenix saw so much of herself in this little girl. Her smile grew when she saw Elsa’s shirt, “Is Rapunzel your favorite princess?”
“She’s the bestest!” The girl tugged the lip of her shirt down to show off the whimsical princess printed on it; it was clearly a beloved shirt, with its old ketchup stains and little holes. Elsa’s smile lit up her face, her eyes shining bright, “What’s your favorite?”
“Who is your favorite.” Bob corrected gently.
“I’m a Rapunzel girl, too.” Phoenix turned around since they were doing show-and-tell and tugged down her shirt collar to show a Tangled sun tattoo at the base of her neck, colored with a splatter of different shades of purple.
Her earlier shyness forgotten, Elsa stepped forward and touched the beautiful design, “Wow.”
Bob moved so he could see too. He’d caught glimpses of it over the last few weeks, but he hadn’t been able to figure out what the tattoo was of. Phoenix looked up through her long lashes and his thoughts teased him, wondering what other tattoos she had and where those might be.
Phoenix caught his eye and winked, as if she had heard his thoughts; Bob cut his eyes away and cleared his throat, knowing he was caught.
“Well, why don’t we get some dinner going, hmm?” Lynette offered, stepping up to retrieve Elsa’s hand, “We’ll leave Bob and Natasha to clean up and get settle in. I’ll grab you some more water, too, Jean.”
“Lynette took the guest room so the only one left is yours, Bob. I hope that’ll be alright for you two?”
“Oh, that’ll be—” Bob froze, realizing exactly what their little ruse had gotten them into. Namely, that Phoenix and him would now be sharing his tiny, little bedroom. Together.
Phoenix caught the ball with ease and smiled, “That should be fine. Thank you, Mrs. Floyd.”
“Please, dear, it’s Jean. Go on, get settled in. We’ll call you when dinner’s ready. And, Bob?”
Bob, who had gone into autopilot, turned back to his grandmother, who claimed his hand and gave it one last squeeze, “Thank you for coming, it’s so nice to have you home.”
He eased at her touch and chastely kissed her cheek again, “There’s no place I’d rather be.”
XxX
The instant the door closed behind him, Bob started to pace, “What are we going to do?”
“Clean up and settle in before dinner, did you not hear your aunt?” Phoenix popped open her suitcase and rummaged around until she found a shirt that smelled clean and her travel case. The only thing she could think about now was a long, hot shower, everything else could wait as far as she was concerned.
“We lied to a government employee!” Panic cracked his voice, “Can we get a court martial for this? I mean, she’s not Navy, but still...”
“Technically, I lied to one, you’re just the accessory.”
Bob stopped and looked at her, clearly not amused. His first wave began to ebb when he realized just how much she had risked for him, “Why...why did you do it?”
“Do what?” Phoenix continued to poke.
His nerves got the best of him and he couldn’t meet her eye. It was then Phoenix realized just how uncharted these waters were; she most definitely wasn’t dealing with Rooster or Payback or one of the guys on her squad. This was Bob, and, contrary to how he might appear, he thought and felt deeply. He was sensitive in the truest sense of the word, which meant trust probably didn’t come easy for him. Phoenix sat down on the bed, reminding herself that she couldn’t hide behind her mask if she expected him to let her see what lay behind his.
“You lied to her, just to help me.” Bob’s voice was a whisper, almost of disbelief. It was as if he’d never had someone he could trust to really have his six on the ground, and that nearly broke her heart.
“Because,” Phoenix started towards him, silently asking him to look at her before she answered, “It’s the right thing to do. For you, for Elsa, for Jean.” She reached over and squeezed his hand, “Besides, we’re unbeatable as a team. We made that impossible run with Mav and I see no reason we won’t be able to see this one through, too.”
Bob watched her steadily, realizing she hadn’t just said what she had off the cuff. She was in this for the long haul, “Do you even know what you’re signing up for?” Here Phoenix was, having gone out of her way to make sure he was okay, going so far as to rearrange her entire life and fly up to Montana with him, and now she was offering not only to pretend to be married to him but to live with and help him take care of Elsa until next summer. This was all too much. And, for what? She didn’t know him, not really, and Bob was pretty sure she wouldn’t be impressed when she did. After all, no one else ever was.
“My contract isn’t up until next July, that’s a year of pretending we’re...we’re…” He couldn’t even say it.
“Like I said, we’re in this together. You’re not gonna get rid of me that easily. Now,” Phoenix grabbed her things and headed for the door, “I need to shower, because I’m gross. I’ll leave you here to think about, oh, I don’t know, tattoos?” She winked and began to chuckle when she saw his face erupt in scarlet.
XxX
Dinner wasn’t as awkward as Bob had been worried it might be. In truth, he was enjoying learning about Phoenix as much as his family was. She had grown up in Arizona but now her and her three older brothers were spread out across the country; one Marine and two Army. She’d gone the Academy route, having used the inheritance her parents left her upon their passing to pay for it, while Bob had slogged up the enlisted chain. Yet, even with their different backgrounds, Phoenix seemed to fit perfectly in his little patch-quilt family.
“So, how long have you two known each other?” Lynette finally asked.
Bob caught his fork before he dropped it and Phoenix headed him off, “It’s been a bit of a whirlwind, actually. We met earlier this year and just decided this is what we wanted.” She looked at him and, if he didn’t know better, Bob would have sworn the love in her eyes was genuine.
Jean hummed, her eyes closing as her own memories caught up to her, “Just like Daniel and me.” She opened her eyes to find Phoenix studying her, “Daniel was in the service, too, a very handsome Navy pilot, and we decided to get married before he shipped out. I think we’d known each other, oh, three weeks?”
“Three weeks to 65 years.” Bob said in almost reverence. He caught Phoenix’s eye and offered a small smile.
Phoenix got another glimpse; Bob’s grandfather has been an instrumental part of his life. She also couldn’t help but grin, because Bob and her had only really known each other three weeks, too.
“To Natasha and Bob, may you have as many happy years together!” Jean raised her glass and Lynette followed suit, even little Elsa hurried to hold up her water, taking care not to spill it.
Bob savored it for a moment before he lifted his own glass and turned to Natasha, finding a spark of courage, “To the woman who taught me that life is worth the risk.” And, just like that, something shifted between the two of them.
Phoenix practically melted at his words and they clinked their glasses together. For the rest of the evening, their little stolen glances didn’t go unnoticed by anyone except the six-year-old.
XxX
Phoenix was just finishing putting her clothes in one of the empty drawers when Bob came back from his shower.
“So, do you have any tattoos?” Her sly eyes playfully raked over him.
In the safety of his room, with no one but her for company, Bob felt his walls give way to his more playful side, “I’m pretty sure that’s a third date question.”
“Well, it is our wedding night, after all.” Phoenix smiled, enjoying their little game, “Speaking of which, we’re gonna have to make this legal. They won’t put us on the housing list if we aren’t and it’s too expensive to live off base, and I doubt Ms. CPS will let us go without an official certificate in hand.”
Slowly, Bob nodded as he sat down on the bed, realizing the weight of what they were talking about, “Are you sure you’re okay with this? It’s...it’s a lot.”
“It’s no biggie, I know at least eight contract marriages, two are in my squad.”
“Eight?” Bob’s eyes grew.
“It’s not like you have any moral ground to stand on right now, Lieutenant Floyd!” Phoenix chuckled.
Bob nodded, his thoughts a whirlwind, “Elsa seems to like you.”
“She’s a great kid.” Phoenix shoved the drawer closed with her hip and grabbed her purple hairbrush.
“Kids aren’t easy, and she definitely has her moments.” Bob muttered, tapping his fist against his mouth, “Maybe we don’t have to live together? I’m sure I can figure something out.”
Phoenix took care to hide her little grin. She didn’t want to hurt his feelings, but she was pretty sure Bob wouldn’t be able to juggle his squad, upcoming deployment, and a six-year-old in a tiny, Californian apartment alone. And, she knew he was smart enough to have figured that out on his own, so she wasn’t sure why he was pushing for it, “But you don’t have to.” She sat down next to him on the bed, “It’s really hard for you to accept help, isn’t it?” She thought of what he had said earlier, about letting others take care of her. Phoenix wondered if he realized his advice had been as much for himself as for her.
Bob ran his hands back through his hair, letting out a long exhale, “Is it easy for you?”
She shook her head, “No.” The vulnerability she felt scared her, but, for once, she leaned into it instead of away, “But I want to do this for you.”
“But, why?”
Phoenix had finally gotten what she had wanted: Bob had let her in and, while she cherished it, her heart ached just the same realizing how wounded and broken he was.
“Because,” Gently, she turned his face to her and framed it with her hands, “You are worth it.”
He tried to hide behind his smile, shutting his eyes tightly to hold the tears back, but a few escaped anyway. Tenderly, Phoenix caressed his face, trying to sooth him and let him know it was alright.
“Oh, I’m sorry.”
The pair jumped apart and Bob quickly turned away to dry his eyes.
“Hi, Jean.” Phoenix stood up and protectively stepped in front of Bob, shielding him from view, which didn’t go unnoticed by the newcomer, “What’s up?”
“I just wanted to give you your wedding present.” Slowly, Jean shuffled into the room and offered Phoenix a little, nondescript box. Phoenix accepted it and looked at Bob, waiting till he was ready to join her.
Once more, the mask was donned and he hid behind his small smile. Though, Phoenix was pretty sure Jean could see through it just as easily as Phoenix now could. Bob looked over her shoulder as Phoenix opened the box and her brow knit when she caught sight of an inscription on one of the two rings resting inside it.
She pulled it out and held up the well-loved gold band, just barely able to make out, In thy breast. She tilted her head, trying to make sense of the odd inscription.
“That was my grandfather’s.” Bob explained, reaching for the other one, “The inscription doesn’t make sense when they’re apart.” He placed the one he held beside Phoenix’s, “‘In thy breast my heart doth rest.’”
“Your grandfather had them made for us when he got back, and I want you to have them.”
“Gran—”
J ean held up a hand, “ I insist, it’s not like I can take them with me when I’m dead anyway . Besides, nothing would make me happier than knowing they get to witness your love story like they did ours. ” She placed a tired hand on Bob’s face, “I know we never talked about this, about Elsa, and I never wanted this burden to fall on you, but I am so grateful you are the man that you are.” Her bright eyes shone even in her aged face as she turned to Phoenix, “Look after him for me, will ya?”
Phoenix nodded, knowing what Jean was asking, “I will.”
Jean stepped back, admiring the pair, and Bob got the hint. He held out his hand, asking for Phoenix’s, and she obliged. Her eyes lingered on the ring he slide over her finger, marveling at how well it fit, before she placed his grandfather’s on his.
“Well, I will leave you to it. Good night, my dears.”
Bob walked with Jean to the door and, once he was sure she would make it down the hall alright, closed the door and dropped his head against it. This was all too much.
“I meant what I said.”
He raised his head to look at Phoenix and offered a small smile. Phoenix wasn’t sure if she was talking about what she had said to him or Jean, or maybe both, but she knew his emotions were spent and she expected nothing in return.
“Um, I’ll...I’ll take the floor.” Bob grabbed one of the pillows and a blanket.
“Bob, the bed’s big enough—”
He turned to her, gently trying to cue her on his boundary, “I’m more comfortable sleeping on the floor.”
Phoenix conceded with a nod and let him get settled before she stepped over him and climbed into bed. She quickly brushed her hair and braided it back before she tucked in. She folded her hands under her chin, her eyes lingering on the ring, “Good night, Robert.” She wasn’t sure what had made her say it, but there was something intimate, more personal, using his first name and, if they were going to be in this, they had to be in it all the way.
“’Night, Natasha.”
XxX
“So, what are you two up to today?”
Phoenix and Bob exchanged a look, “Um, we’re thinking about heading into town for the day, if that’s alright.” Bob answered.
Phoenix quickly added, “Yeah, maybe do some sight-seeing before heading up to the Cliffs.” Jean popped a playful brow at “sight-seeing” but nodded.
Elsa, with her unbrushed rat’s nest, pipped up, “Can I come?”
“Maybe another time.” Bob replied, not wavering even when her little lip started quivering.
Phoenix was still too new to their routine and couldn’t help herself, “How about we plan something special to do this weekend, hmm? Maybe we could build a fort and watch Tangled?”
“Sucker.” Bob whispered into his OJ as Elsa began cheering. Phoenix wrinkled her nose at him.
A little after ten, they were heading to the courthouse. Phoenix saw Bob’s hands flexing around the steering wheel, his nerves getting the best of him.
“You okay?”
“Y-yeah, it’s just…”
Phoenix waited for him to find the words. She wasn’t going to push, but she didn’t want to brush it aside either, which left her in a predicament. This was a whole new world for her, the exact opposite of her usual bull-forward personality, but she had learned a valuable lesson last night, and she wasn’t going to risk Bob scurrying back behind his mask when he had finally dared to venture out.
Finally, he sighed, “I have spent my whole life trying not to be my father and...” He carelessly brushed back his hair and Phoenix grinned, enjoying the little traits of his that were coming out now that they were far away from base, “Now I’m taking the easy way out. I’m lying to everyone – CPS, Jean, the Navy – just to get what I want, and I didn’t even hesitate to do so. I don’t like that. It’s what my father would do, and I don’t want to be him.”
Her smile faltered as he shared his heart, “Robert, you’re here and he isn’t, and that says all that needs to be said.” Phoenix sat up, her passion roaring to life, “You’re doing what needs to be done to keep your family together, and you are sacrificing everything to do so because that’s what a man does. He goes to the wall, no matter the cost. You aren’t taking the easy way out, you are stepping up to do what needs to be done.”
Bob’s face softened, “You sound like my grandfather.”
“I’ll take that as a compliment.” Phoenix rested her head against the seat, savoring the peace that had dawned across his face at her words.
They pulled into the courthouse soon after and headed inside, where Phoenix was surprised to learn how lax Montana was concerning marriage. They could actually sign a simple Declaration of Marriage without any sort of ceremony, they just had to declare the date they had agreed to the arrangement. Phoenix wasn’t exactly sure what she expected, but she felt slightly disheartened that there wasn’t more to it.
His pen hovered above the line, “What date should we use?” Bob asked, sweat beading on his temple.
“May 27th.” Phoenix shrugged when he looked at her, wondering why she had picked that day, “It’s the day we ran our mission.”
“At least it’ll be easy to remember.”
Phoenix watched him fill in the date and smirked, her playfulness teased, “And, just so you know, I prefer edible gifts over perfume or jewelry.” Phoenix winked, “Hey, they say the first anniversary is the most important!”
Bob shook his head but Phoenix could tell he enjoyed her little quip. After the declaration was paid for and submitted, the pair headed out.
“You know, this isn’t me…” Bob started as they walked along. Phoenix turned to him, waiting for him to continue. He cleared his throat, “I mean, I’m— I’m not a spur-of-the-moment type of guy, I like planning and knowing what’s ahead.”
“Never would have guessed.”
He stopped and Phoenix followed suit, knowing what he had to say must be serious.
“I was taught that marriage is something to be taken seriously, it’s not something that comes with an exit strategy because it isn’t about you but the two of you and...” He pushed his glasses up as he rubbed his eyes, “This isn’t coming out right. What I’m trying to say is that I’m doing this for Elsa, and, I’m not holding you to anything and we’ll get everything annulled next summer once I’m retired, but I want you to know that marriage is something I take very seriously and this,” He gestured around, trying to find the words, “Isn’t me.”
Slowly, Phoenix nodded, knowing she had been trusted with another very important piece of his heart. She continued to play his words over in her head, not sure what to say, let alone what her own views on marriage were.
Bob cleared his throat, his courage waning, “Well, with that out of the way…” Bob pushed open the front door and stood back, “After you, Mrs. Floyd.” He winced, realizing, too late, that he probably should have kept that joke to himself.
Phoenix just laughed as she walked passed and playfully bumped into him, “That’s Lieutenant Floyd to you, Lieutenant Floyd!”
Bob eased into a smile, not for the first time feeling undeserving of such a friend , “ Yes, ma’am! ” He chuckled as he followed after her.
XxX
Bob parked in front of the grocer and the pair hopped out to pick up some snacks before heading up to the Cliffs. Lost in their own little world, Bob pushed the cart along while Phoenix grabbed anything and everything that looked good.
“Bobbie?”
Bob looked down the aisle and Phoenix felt him tense. Her eyes followed his line of sight as a Miss-Montana-wannabe strutted down the aisle towards them.
“I heard you were in town.” The woman zeroed in on Bob and pulled him into a hug even while he remained stock-still, “Oh, where are my manners? I’m Ash.” She offered her perfectly manicured hand to Phoenix.
Phoenix accepted it and pasted on a smile, “Natasha. Nice to meet you.” Her eyes wandered to Bob, who was making his retreat.
Bob practically hid behind Phoenix just like Elsa had done with him the day before, “Ash and I went to high school together.” He explained.
“Oh, it was more than that!” Ash tittered, turning to Phoenix, “We grew up together and dated our senior year, I was his first kiss.”
Phoenix shifted; she stood to her full height, waiting to see how the game was played. Bob shrugged, trying to find an out.
But, Ash had him in her sights and wasn’t going to miss her short, “I guess I should say his only kiss. Bob’s never been one to play the field, or even step up to bat, like the rest of ‘em. Not like he’s had many chances to, I imagine.”
Bob’s jaw shifted, but he wouldn’t take the bait.
Phoenix, however, was willing to fight fire with fire, “Oh, I wouldn’t say that. I’ve seen how the girls fawn over him, especially in his blues.” She gave a low whistle, “During our last mission, I think he broke quite a few hearts without even realizing it.” She caught Bob’s little grin out of the corner of her eye, his way of thanking her for having his back.
“Oh, so you’re Navy, too?” Ash pursed her lips when Phoenix nodded, “What brought you out this way?”
Phoenix didn’t waver, “We had some leave so we came up to check on Jean and Elsa.”
“We?” Ash popped a very sculpted eyebrow as she looked at Bob.
Phoenix had forged most of the way, and Bob stepped up to see it through, “Natasha’s my wife, Ash.” He tentatively wrapped his arm around Phoenix, relaxing as she leaned into him.
“Oh.”
Phoenix wasn’t sure she had ever smiled so big as she watched the vapid paint of the beauty contort her face and show her true self.
“We should get going, it was good seeing you, Ash.” Bob excused them quickly, knowing his lie was too easy to see through.
They quickly checked out and, after a hearty congratulations from the clerk who had seen everything go down, headed for the Cliffs. When they reached the lookout, Bob hopped out and grabbed the blanket from the tuck bed while Phoenix gathered her little treasure trove of snacks. After a couple beats, she finally chanced, “So, what happened there?”
Bob winced, knowing exactly what she was asking about, “We dated, she gave me a shot, and I blew it.”
“Blew it, or dodged a bullet?” Phoenix rummaged through the Gatorades and tossed one to Bob. She saw him brighten when he caught it, “What?”
“Oh, I was thinking that I wanted a Gatorade and then you tossed one to me, it was just funny.”
“Yeah, the light blue ones are your favorite.” She replied, grabbing one of the iced coffees for herself. She smirked, remembering one lecture day when Fanboy had grabbed the last one from the snack bar and Bob swapped it with a dark blue one when Fanboy had his back turned, “But you always drink a yellow one after a run, why is that?”
Bob shrugged, “They say lemon’s good for you after a work out.”
“Yellow Gatorade has never been near a lemon in its life and you know that!” Phoenix chuckled, playfully bumping him as she joined him on the blanket. She took a swig of her drink, gazing out over the little town, “And you didn’t blow it.” She leaned back and closed her eyes. The soft breeze and the kiss of sunshine were nice, but her favorite part was the feel of Bob’s eyes as he watched her, feeling safe enough to do so. Finally, she sighed, “She did.”
His smile grew and he leaned back too, letting the silence linger, because, with Phoenix, there was comfort in just being together.
XxX
Over the next few days the two found a stride similar to the one they had in the air. Bob enjoyed watching Phoenix maneuvered through his world and claim a place for herself in it, but the look that drew across her face each and every night when they sat together on the porch to watch the sunset was his favorite. He would playfully tease her, asking if he had oversold them, and she would always shake her head, too awestruck for words.
It was bittersweet for Bob as their leave came to an end. He would miss the little routine they built, but they were booked to fly out that Saturday so they could get the house set up for Elsa’s arrival at the end of the month and he was excited for the next chapter, even if it was pretend.
If Bob had risked sharing his heart, though, he would have found out that Phoenix felt the same way.
As they drove into town that Friday, Phoenix looked longingly at the pub just like she did every time they drove through. She had never said anything, knowing Bob didn’t drink or even seem to enjoy being in bars, but she had always been a fan of local crafts and the siren signs advertising the different breweries beckoned her every time. Her face grew surprised when she felt the truck shift and saw Bob pull into the parking lot.
She popped a brow in question and he just shrugged, “You might not get another chance to try the local brew before we fly out.”
Phoenix grinned and hopped out, not needing to be told twice.
“Hi, Ken.” Bob greeted as he held the door open for Phoenix, who snuck under his arm.
“Bobbie!” Ken, a gruff, good ol’ boy, threw out his big bear arms, “Long time! And who ya got here?”
“Um, this is my wife,” Bob smiled nervously, still not used to the term, “Natasha.”
“No shit? Well, this calls for a celebration! Whatever you want, on the house!” Ken gestured to his wares as Phoenix perused the listings.
“Bob? That is you!”
Phoenix felt Bob start to tense and she didn’t need to look at him to know he was grimacing. She looked up as a tall, pudgy guy, probably around their age, made his way over.
“Hi, Pete.” Bob greeted, always one for manners. Phoenix accepted the pint Ken slid her way and took a sip, her eyes closely watching the interaction.
“Did I hear right? Your wife?” Pete looked at Phoenix with a crooked smile that matched his crooked nose. Phoenix was pretty sure it might also match a crooked personality, but she was willing to give him a fair shot.
“Yeah, Natasha, Pete, Pete, Natasha.” Bob quickly introduced before ordering a water from Ken.
Pete clapped Bob’s shoulders, almost throwing him off balance and knocking his glasses askew, “So, our Bobbie finally lost his v-card! I’m so proud of you! Only took thirty years, but still, progress is progress.” Pete laughed heartily at his own joke, not realizing he was the only one, and threw an arm around Bob.
Bob moved away as politely as he could and Phoenix realized she’d found another line of his. When it came to the goings on of the bedroom, there was a large “do not enter” sign posted in bright red. It was probably the reason he had shared his view on marriage with her, to help her understand why he was so particular about their sleeping arrangement. It was also why she hadn’t asked any questions about Ash, knowing there was a story there that had scared him deeply.
“He’s the only guy I know who turned down the chance in high school. And with the hottest girl in town!” Pete jutted his thumb over his shoulder at Bob, “Stupidest thing he ever did, I’d say! Well, ya know, apart from joining the military.”
Bob hid his grin behind his hand as he rubbed his mouth, “Natasha’s a fighter pilot, we met on my last mission.”
Pete looked back at her with wide eyes, “No shit?”
“Looks like joining the military was probably the best thing to happen to him.” Phoenix took a sip of her drink and Bob toasted his water to her.
“I thought you might be one of those Russian mail order brides since Bobbie’s never had much luck with the ladies. You’re not Russian?”
Phoenix stared at him, “Italian and Mexican, but close.” Bob caught her eye, an apology all but written on his face. Phoenix was pretty sure it was a record for how fast she had ever drank a pint and Bob quickly excused them to finish up their errands before they headed back to the farm.
Quietly, she watched him as they drove back. Bob was lost deep in thought, probably in a memory made long before he knew her. She found herself wishing he’d let her in, because she was desperate to see the parts of him he rarely shared with anyone else.
XxX
“Okay! Got our popcorn, candy, soda. Looks like we’re set!” Phoenix clapped her hands together as she reached for the TV remote. They had gone all out for their movie night; Bob and Phoenix had hung a white sheet from the stairs to the couch and they had collected all the cushions, pillows, and blankets they could find to stuff inside their little fort. Phoenix had rummaged around in the shed and found some Christmas lights that she had strung across the top to give it a magical touch.
Elsa sat in the middle of it all, hugging her little unicorn, “Wow…” She whispered.
Phoenix snuck in beside her and Elsa quickly cuddled into her. She was struck, not for the first time, by how much she enjoyed this. She knew things wouldn’t always be this easy, and there was definitely going to be an adjustment period when they got back to Lemoore, but, when it came down to it, she knew she’d made the right decision.
“Will you brush my hair?” Elsa held up her little pink brush and one she had clearly absconded with from Bob’s room, “And Bob can brush your hair! And we can have Rapunzel braids and flowers! I want the purple and blue ones but you can have the yellow and pink ones.”
Bob, who had claimed the recliner outside the fort, got up when Phoenix held her brush out to him, “We need to have a talk about boundaries, little miss.” He said.
“Tomorrow?” Elsa bartered.
Bob looked at Phoenix, realized he was outnumbered, and nodded as Phoenix hit play. The familiar logo lit up the screen and Phoenix chuckled as Bob tried to fold his lengthy self under the sheet. He finally managed it and plopped behind her, a small smile of triumph on his face because the fort was still standing.
Phoenix pulled out some of the flowers Elsa wanted and handed the bag to him, “You can have the green ones.” She teased.
“I’m good.” He laughed and reached up to pull out her ponytail. It surprised Phoenix that he didn’t hesitate in doing so but she figured it might be because he was used to helping with Elsa’s hair, even though part of her hoped it might have something to do with the trust they were building. She had noticed the last few days that he had let his black-and-white rules get a big grey; he didn’t retreat as quickly when she leaned into him and he would even let his hand brush her back when he let her go first.
Phoenix was partially right, but the real reason was because Bob had been aching to touch her and this was the first chance he had been given to all day. Jean and Lynette had headed into the city for a follow-up appointment early that morning so there hadn’t been a need to keep their ruse up and it had left Bob missing something he knew he shouldn’t. Bob knew it wasn’t real, that this was all just make believe, but he was willing to pay whatever price there was to make this moment with Phoenix last a little bit longer.
As Bob brushed her hair, Phoenix found herself melting into the sensation of the brush gently gliding through her thick strands. She finished with Elsa’s hair pretty quickly, since sitting still was not a favorite activity of most six-year-olds, and tucked a few flowers into her braid before settling back to enjoy the feel of Bob’s soft touch.
Bob felt a stirring as Phoenix leaned back against him. It was like it was just the two of them, far away from the rest of the world in their little sanctuary. He was content listening to the little sighs she made as he brushed her hair, which told him he was doing something right.
He was surprised when he heard the credits start up and he looked over to find Elsa fast asleep. Bob grinned when he realized Phoenix was almost asleep too. Gently, he shifted and watched her wake up, “I’m gonna tuck Elsa in.”
Phoenix nodded and moved so he could slip pass. Their bodies brushed and Bob felt the spark, but he quickly quieted it. Phoenix savored it and found herself laying back down after Bob had taken Elsa upstairs, her eyes watching the lights as they twinkled.
Bob helped Elsa sleepwalk through brushing her teeth before he tucked her in and flipped on her little otter nightlight. Carefully, he closed the door and headed for his own room which he was surprised to find empty. He started back downstairs, “Natasha?”
“I’m in here.” Came a soft reply.
He saw her bare feet sticking out of the little opening and he swallowed as he squatted down beside it, “You coming to bed?” His face flushed, realizing how that might sound.
Phoenix looked at him, her dark, shimmering halo crowning her and her eyes the softest brown, “I just wanted to enjoy the lights a little longer.”
Bob nodded and started to get up.
“You can join me, if you like.”
The temptation grew as she reached her hand out to him and he yielded, feeling unable to do otherwise. He carefully laid down beside her, letting his arm rest lightly against hers.
Phoenix smiled, lost in her own memories, “My brothers and I used to take over the entire living room and build a fortress. We’d wail on each other for hours with those toy lightsabers and pillows and whatever else we could get our hands on.”
“You must be pretty close.” Bob mused, trying to imagine what the Trace boys were like.
Her smile faltered, “No, not really. Sam, he’s the oldest, headed for boot camp the minute he turned eighteen, Jude and Cam followed after and we just sort of, I don’t know, life went on.”
Bob nodded. Even though he didn’t know exactly how that might feel, he knew enough about loss to understand where she was coming from.
Phoenix dropped her head to the side. There was a question she was desperate to ask, but she just couldn’t bring herself to force his hand.
As if he could read her thought, he sighed, his eyes watching the twinkling lights, “It’s alright, go ahead.”
“What Ash said, and Pete...have you never...ya know…” Phoenix rocked her head. For all her show, she knew she was just as prudish as Bob.
“The first night we were here, you asked if I have a tattoo.” His voice was so quiet, as if he were sharing a secret he wasn’t sure he should.
Phoenix nodded, worried that, if she spoke, he might scurry back into himself.
Bob brushed back his hair and pulled off his glasses, the memories flooding his thoughts, “After...after my grandfather died, I—I got a tattoo of part of a letter he wrote me.” Bob looked at Phoenix, his quiet smile warming his face, but she could see the pain in the depths of his eyes. In their little nest, however, tucked away from any prying eyes, he knew he was safe, “It’s a quote by Robert Browning.” Bob cleared his throat as he looked back at the ceiling. He traced the tattoo through his shirt, the place right above his heart, “It’s in his handwriting right here. I figured it was the one place I could count on my grandmother never seeing.”
Phoenix turned and propped her head up, wanting to see him. Bob looked at her, his fingers drumming on his stomach.
“And, he wrote that letter because—” He took a sharp inhale, “Because he was the one that found me in the barn after I told Ash I couldn’t.” His strength faltered and he pressed the heels of his hands into his eyes.
Phoenix wasn’t sure what she should do and was terrified she might do the wrong thing or make him uncomfortable trying to do the right thing. But, she knew that she couldn’t let him feel alone, not now. So, carefully, she reached out and took his hand. She watched him, almost asking for permission, as she pulled his hand back to her and pressed it to her cheek. He watched the interaction as if he weren’t part of it, and treasured the sweet gesture.
“I’d driven her home after the homecoming game and we were doing, ya know, the typical teenage goodnight routine.” Bob chuckled, “Then she said her parents were gone all night and asked if I wanted to come in. And I just...I didn’t freeze,” Bob shrugged as he sought the right words, “But, I knew I didn’t want to, not yet. I told her I couldn’t and that I had to get the truck back, and…” Another shaky breath and, this time, he squeezed her hand, “She didn’t take it too well. On Monday, the whole school knew that I was still a virgin and it became my nickname until graduation.”
Phoenix brought her other hand up and hugged his to her face. She just couldn’t understand how someone could be so cruel to anyone, let alone to Bob.
“I went straight home after school and holed up in the barn. There I was, seventeen and bawling my eyes out. Very manly response, right?” He tried to laugh as he continued to force back his tears even now, “My grandfather found me and he got enough out to piece it together. That night, when I finally went inside, I found a letter on my pillow.” Bob’s smile was full now as he remembered the man who had meant so much to him, “He—he said he was proud that I knew myself well enough to know that I wanted to wait and that it took a lot of grit to go against the crowd. And he shared how he knew Jean was the right one for him, giving me some practical advice for the future, I guess, and he ended with that Browning quote. ‘I was made and meant to look for you—’”
“‘And wait for you and become yours forever.’”
Bob had stopped when he heard Phoenix join him and he just stared at her. She rolled up her left sleeve to show the quote tattooed on her bicep, “It’s a good quote.”
Bob settled back, quite content, “It is.”
“Well, if it counts for anything, I stand by what I said. Ash blew it, not you.” Phoenix laid her head back down, gazing up at him, “And your grandfather was right, following the crowd is stupid. Best to forge your own path, do what’s right for you, not anyone else.”
“I’m starting to learn that.” He smiled softly.
The pair settled back in, savoring the gentle light and the stillness of the farm, so unlike their life back on base. Soon, their peace yielded to sleep but not before Phoenix risked moving closer, nestling her head against his shoulder. Bob, in turn, rested his head atop hers, feeling more at home than he had in years.
XxX
Jean slowly sipped her coffee as she smiled down at the pair of entwined feet. She’d chanced a peek inside the little fort and noticed how tightly her grandson held his wife in his arms, just like his grandfather used to do with her.
“Lord, let them find a way to make it work, no matter what comes their way. Let them go the distance.” Jean prayed before quietly retreating to the kitchen.
XxX
Phoenix was the first to stir, her nose twitching when she realized she was not in a bed. Her next thought was realizing that she was very much not alone.
When she saw Bob still fast asleep, she laid her head back in the crook of his arm. In the bliss of sleep, his face was so peaceful, as if he didn’t have a care in the world. She knew all that would change when he woke up and hid behind that quiet smile of his yet again.
So, for now, she savored the way he held her, because she knew it would be gone too soon.
She was right and Bob woke up quite flustered a few minutes later. He put some distance between them but still lingered, his heart not ready to part just yet, “We fell asleep.” He rubbed the sleep from his eyes.
Playfully, she snuggled back into the pillow and looked up at him teasingly, “It’s a good thing we’re married then, isn’t it?” She beamed when she saw the smile drawing across his face.
“Breakfast?” He offered and snuck out once she had nodded.
Phoenix lingered a little while longer, realizing, not for the first time, that she was beginning to fall for the quiet wizzo, and hoping he might be doing the same.
XxX
They spent the rest of the day running the last few errands before their flight out that night. Bob always paid close attention to Phoenix, but he was even more attentive as he watched how she moved through the town and the farm that had been his childhood. It was like she was the bridge between what his life was and what it was now, and he was scared that the feelings churning up within him might ruin everything because he couldn’t imagine a world in which someone like Phoenix would want to be with someone like him.
XxX
Their flight back was a breeze and they spent the rest of Sunday sorting through their things to determine what they should put in storage and what they should bring to the house.
Phoenix, for her part, was shocked at just how little Bob owned. He was a minimalist in the truest sense and, remembering his room, it seemed he had spent his life with only the bare necessities.
Bob, for his part, wasn’t surprised, but he also couldn’t help it when he saw just how much was cluttered in Phoenix’s apartment. At least, he thought there was an apartment under all the mess. Phoenix stuck her tongue out and threw a sock at him when she saw his face and she began her first of many laundry trips.
Monday morning Phoenix headed to housing and got their keys while Bob helped sort the movers. By Monday night, they were completely moved in to the little two-bedroom house. Bob had sorted his boxes as they came in while Phoenix had the movers stack hers in the small living room, trapping them in a maze of cardboard.
“Hey, it’s the first line of defense against any intruders!” She asserted when Bob raised a brow in her direction. He just laughed and left her to it.
As the long day came to a close, Phoenix grabbed a shower while Bob continued to sort his meager belongings. A little while later, she rounded the bend as she toweled her hair and was pleasantly surprised to find Bob sitting on the bed, caught up in a book.
“The Letters of Robert Browning and Elizabeth Barrett Browning.” Her grin grew when she realized she’d startled him, “Bit of light reading before bed?”
Bob caught the book before it could clatter to the floor, “Sorry.” His eyes cut around as if looking for an escape.
“For what? Reading?” Phoenix tossed her hair towel over the door and plopped down on the bed beside him.
“My grandfather gave it to me when I enlisted and I just want to make sure it’s kept some place safe.”
“Away from sticky six-year-old fingers?” She smirked as she moved to look over his shoulder, letting her chin rest gently on it, “‘Well, I do think of it sometimes as you see. Which proves that I love you better than myself by the whole width of the Heavens; the sevenfold Heavens. Yet I think again how He of the heavens and earth brought us together so wonderfully, holding two souls in His hand.’” She closed her eyes and hummed, letting the words linger in the air, “Even his letters are poetry.”
Bob just nodded before he closed the book and tucked it safely within the nightstand. He felt Phoenix shift and burrow under the covers and the same temptation that arose the night he had joined her in the fort stirred, and he could almost feel Phoenix waiting to see if he would yield to it or not. He rubbed his face, remembering how hard it had been last night to get to sleep in his own apartment miles away from her. It felt so silly, and he knew he shouldn’t, but all he wanted to do was be near her.
“A-are…” He started, feeling the lump in his throat.
Patiently, Phoenix waited for him as he took a couple breaths, his hands flexing along the mattress.
“Are y-you alright if I sleep with you? No, that’s not what I meant! I meant in the bed, sleep in the bed! Nothing else!” His nerves stirred and his words spewed out, “We only brought over one of the beds and the other room is full of boxes and I don’t think my back can handle another night on the floor and—”
“Bob,” Phoenix gently reached out and touched the place between his shoulder blades. Her heart ached when she felt him startle at the touch. Instead of words, she pulled back the covers on his side and encouraged him to lay back. She checked in with him, making sure he was alright, before moving back to her side.
His fingers ripped back through his bangs and Phoenix realized that was probably one of her favorite quirks of his, “I’m gonna pick up some things for Elsa’s room tomorrow. You have a session tomorrow morning, right? I can drop you off before I head into the city.”
“Yep.” She popped the “p” as she clicked off the light on her side, “Hey, can I ask you something?” She looked at him as she settled in and continued once he offered a nod, “Why don’t you have things?” Phoenix propped her head up, “Like, besides the basics. It surprised me you didn’t have anything personal up in your apartment, not even pictures of Jean or Elsa.”
Bob just shrugged, “I spend most of my time on base or deployed, I don’t need much. And all my pictures are on my phone.”
“But don’t you want it to feel like home when you get back?”
Bob felt the pit growing in his stomach, because this, right now with Phoenix, was the closest he had felt to being home in years.
“I hadn’t thought about it.” He finally managed.
“Maybe you should, because we all need a place to call our own.” Phoenix snuggled in, “My session should be done by 11. Maybe I can go with you tomorrow and we can pick out some things for you, too?”
“I don’t need anything, Natasha.” Bob reached over and clicked his light off, feeling too exposed in its warm glow.
She watched his silhouette for a while, “Maybe you don’t, but we do.” She whispered, her courage spurred in the shadows. Phoenix knew he had heard her but she let it be, knowing Bob would need time to sort it out on his own.
XxX
As Bob pushed the cart down the aisle, Phoenix kept pointing out things she liked and asking his opinion which ranged from “meh” to a shrug, with mostly shrugs. They went back-and-forth for close to an hour before she called for a time out to grab a coffee.
When Phoenix came back, she was surprised to see Bob standing in front of a display of little inspirational box signs. One in particular seemed to have caught his eye, a simple little box that had “home is wherever I’m with you” written across it.
It was the first thing she had seen catch his eye all day so she quickly reached around and dropped one in their cart.
Bob turned around, “Natasha, no—”
“Too late, it’s in the cart!” She snuck under his arms and stole the cart away, “Come on, we have a lot more ground to cover!”
XxX
They easily found a comfortable routine in the weeks that followed and, soon enough, the day came for Bob to fly back up to collect Elsa. Phoenix would be holding down the fort, mostly because she was scheduled for an intense training week but also as a last hurrah of her single life.
By the time Friday rolled around, she was beat and practically collapsed on the couch, not sure she would even be able to make it to bed. The latch caught her ear and she looked at the clock.
“You’re early.” Reluctantly, she dragged herself to her feet and started for the foyer.
The door had barely opened when a squeal of, “Natasha!” sounded and a little purple blur flung itself at her. Exhaustion weighed heavy but a second wind picked up at the uninhibited love the girl had for her and Phoenix hugged Elsa as if she thought she never would again.
“Bob got you something!” Elsa spoiled, looking back at her brother.
Phoenix brushed back Elsa’s golden tresses as she continued to hug her legs and turned to Bob, who sheepishly held up a bouquet of purple flowers, “They’re not edible, but they can be if you try hard enough.” He joked, trying to sidestep his nerves, “Elsa said we had to get you something since we got her something last time.”
“Oh, did she?” Phoenix started forward with her sixty-pound leg weight and accepted the gift, “They’re beautiful.” Their rich smell filled her, brightening her whole mood. Calculatedly, she leaned forward and kissed his cheek as she whispered, “How’d it go?”
Bob whispered back, “Lots of tears – hers, Jean’s, mine – with one meltdown during our layover because she was too upset to eat before we left and was running on fumes.”
“Did you get something in her?” Phoenix was surprised by how quickly it came. She’d never considered herself the maternal type, but she’d also never been given a chance to be one before.
“About four nuggets and an ice cream cone.”
“Did you eat anything?”
Bob sheepishly looked at her and Phoenix looked down at Elsa, “Let’s go put these in some water and get the adults some dinner, hmm?” The two waddled off and Bob followed, breathing a sign of relief that he now had reinforcements because that hour layover had nearly killed him.
XxX
After a quick dinner of boxed mac-and-cheese and no less than eight reads through of her favorite Rapunzel book, Elsa was fast asleep in her new room with her little otter light. Bob carefully closed the door and quietly made his way towards the master bedroom where Phoenix was sprawled across the bed, not moving.
“Long day?”
A groan was his only answer.
“I’ll take Elsa to the park tomorrow, give you some time to reset.”
Finally, Phoenix managed to at least lift her head, “You’ve had her all week.”
“Yeah, but I had Jean and Lynette’s help. I don’t need a break like you do.” Bob offered a small smile as he grabbed his pajamas and headed for the bathroom.
Phoenix brushed her hair back, “That’s not what I meant…” She said to the empty room. Dropping her head back down, her eyes lingered on Bob’s bedside table where a picture of him and his grandfather with Elsa tucked between them sat. It was one of the many she had stolen from his phone and had printed off while he was away to hang up around the house.
At first, Phoenix had been looking forward to having the week to herself but, as the week had gone on, she found the house too empty and that she didn’t quite know what to do with herself. It startled her, how quickly she had accepted their new normal.
A smile tugged at her, she had also gotten used to sharing her bed. Bob started each night off taking great care to stay on his side but Phoenix woke up every morning tucked snugly in his arms. Since she went for runs early in the morning, she would carefully extracted herself and pretended like nothing was amiss when she saw him later, knowing he might start sleeping on the floor again if he knew.
A polite knock and the door opened. Bob came in with his usual small smile as he moved to comb his freshly showered hair. As he moved towards the bed, he let his eyes linger on the little sign Phoenix had bought. He’d figured out pretty quickly that he snuck over to her side of the bed every night but the care that Phoenix took in not letting him know that she knew told him she must not mind. And, he was grateful for that, because it was his favorite part of this game of house they were playing. He knew it would eventually come to an end, but, for now, he let himself enjoy it.
Phoenix watched him, not bothering to hide it, and she met his eye when he turned to her, “I missed you.” The thought whispered itself.
His breath caught. It was what Bob had been hoping to hear, but he couldn’t bring himself to accept it, “Yeah, I saw the laundry pile.” If he was honest, Bob had found it impossible to sleep without her beside him and he had counted down the minutes until he was back in their house, in their bed, together.
Phoenix crinkled her nose at his reply but he just grinned so, when Bob began to pull back his side of the covers, she refused to budge. He raised a brow and she just stuck her tongue out.
“Oh, real mature, Natasha.” Bob chuckled as he forced his way onto the bed with no help from her. Eventually, he made it under a corner of the covers, but he was still hanging half off, “Really?”
Phoenix, having had her fun, rolled over to her side as Bob pulled off his glasses, all but tutting at her, and turned off his light. If anything, she savored the victory that he had pushed back instead of scurried away from her little game. His boldness spurred her to push a little bit more.
“Did you miss me?”
Bob smiled, feeling safer in the shadows, “Yeah, I did.”
Phoenix nestled in, resting in the contentment she felt, “Me too.” Her eyes traced his familiar silhouette; she couldn’t wait for him to sneak over to her side that night.
XxX
The little family found their stride over the next few weeks, with Phoenix even managing her first “no” and Bob and her both surviving their first major temper tantrum, in the middle of the grocery store no less. Since their schedules were packed with extra training sessions, Bob and Phoenix signed Elsa up for whatever summer camps caught her eye so she didn’t have to spend the whole day cooped up in the base’s childcare. It quickly became apparent that ballet was her favorite and they decided to sign her up for regular classes which Elsa was thrilled about because she got to be in a mini-recital at the end of summer.
Bob and Phoenix easily fell into their roles, always in-sync. With each passing day, Bob was getting more comfortable, finally having a place he felt he could call his own. One Saturday, when he’d woken up before Phoenix, he let himself brush back her hair like he had always wanted to. The touch had caused her to stir and he smiled as she sighed a, “good morning, Robert.” He had stuttered some excuse and scurried off soon after but Phoenix didn’t mind. She replayed over and over how his feather touch had felt across her temple and she smiled, knowing how much it had taken him to work up the courage to do so.
Their push-and-pull made even their hardest days bearable; when Phoenix had a rough training schedule, Bob somehow always knew how to lighten her load, and Phoenix was carefully fine tuning her responses as Bob invited her further behind his walls.
They still hadn’t risked talking about what this little arrangement of theirs was becoming, which they probably should have done sooner rather than later.
While Phoenix was sure about what she wanted, even though she never said as much, fearing she might scare Bob back into himself, Bob continued to hold a few pieces back, not wanting to get his hopes up since he had convinced himself that Phoenix was just being a good friend.
It all came to a head one afternoon when they went to pick Elsa up from her ballet class. Bob had taken point on drop-offs and pick-ups since his schedule was more open in the afternoons, so this was the first time Phoenix had ventured into their little ballet world. The pair found a seat in the viewing area and Bob wasn’t sure what he enjoyed more: seeing how well Elsa was doing in her class as she paid close attention to her teacher or how Phoenix leaned forward with her nose practically pressed against the glass, an ever growing smile on her face. It was obvious she was just as proud as he was that Elsa was flourishing here.
Bob leaned back, letting his arm hang over Phoenix’s chair, and was startled when he felt a firm hand squeeze it.
“It’s good to see you again, Bob.” Stephanie, who had the twin terrors in Elsa’s class, purred down at him. Her long extension lashes fluttered, looking very much like a cat toy.
“G-good to see you too, Stephanie.” Bob tried to find a polite way to free himself, “Um, your girls are doing great this week.” He successfully freed his arm and pointed at the window before awkwardly crossing his arms over his chest. Stephanie, he had learned early on, didn’t understand personal space, or she just didn’t care, and Bob had gone to great lengths to keep his distance ever since the thigh grab incident.
Phoenix had looked up when she felt him shift and she checked in with Bob before turning to the newcomer. Her eyes narrowed. Natasha knew it wasn’t right to judge a book by its cover but, at the same time, one usually found summaries on the cover, “We haven’t met. I’m Natasha, Robert’s wife.”
The use of his first name cued Bob in. He watched with carefully concealed amusement as Phoenix shook the dance mom’s hand, nearly crushing her perfectly manicured fingers.
“Pleasure.” Stephanie had pulled back, flexing her hands in a very pointed way, “I think it’s just the sweetest that Bob took custody of Elsa after everything that happened with her grandmother and her parents. And the fact that he is going to retire to take care of her full time? Aw, warms my heart! It’s a shame you’ve been snatched up.” Stephanie offered a big, longing sigh and Bob forced a polite smile, “So, you must be Elsa’s aunt?” Stephanie asked, remembering Phoenix.
Phoenix raised a brow, questioning just how much time Bob had spent with this woman, “Yeah, Elsa’s ours.”
Bob was caught off by Phoenix’s retort. He had always known she had been serious about helping him with Elsa, and he knew how close Phoenix and Elsa had gotten over the past couple months, but her response said more than just the few words uttered. It told him what he had been wanting to know for a while now: she thought of their little trio as a family, just like he did.
Stephanie continued to stare at Phoenix with pursed lips. Before any more sparing could commence, however, one of the twins punched the other and they began rolling across the studio floor. The instructor simply sighed and knocked on the window with a call of, “Stephanie!”
“It’s been a pleasure.” Stephanie forced a sickening sweet smile.
Phoenix couldn’t resist getting the last word in, “So you said.” She watched to make sure the door was closed before she fell back with a scowl, “Fucking Jody.”
“I think the term you’re looking for is Barracks Bunny.”
She cut her eyes to him, “As long as she isn’t in my barracks.”
“Neither yours nor the surrounding ones.” Bob couldn’t help his small smile. He’d never thought of himself as someone anyone would be jealous of and he was enjoying her little territorial display.
Phoenix eased her green-eyes and settled back, content to watch Stephanie wrangle her two girls while Elsa twirled around in her little skirt.
Bob watched her a while longer before he sighed, knowing he couldn’t put it off any longer, “Natasha?”
“Hmm?”
“I...I got my orders.”
Phoenix felt her heart speed up but she kept her head, “When?”
“End of August.”
Slowly, she nodded.
“I was thinking I could ask Jean—”
“ No, I can handle it. ” Phoenix shifted, tightening her arms.
“It’s six months, Natasha.” Bob tousled his hair, “I thought they might put it off until next year, and that I’d be out, but they didn’t.”
“Do you think I can’t handle it ?” Her anger raged so she didn’t have to feel the ache.
“No! You can do anything.” Bob looked at her and his sincerity warmed her heart, “It’s just—”
“You can’t take her away too!” Phoenix folded back into herself. She wasn’t sure the last time she had let her heart venture so far out and now she remembered why.
Bob pulled back, trying to reassess what he had missed, “I won’t, I just...you’ve been so good with Elsa the past few months, you’ve even replaced me as the favorite, but this is a lot. More than you signed up for.” For the first time, he couldn’t figure out what she was thinking, and it bothered him, “What do you want me to do?”
“ Come back to us as soon as you can. ”
Bob pulled back, not having expected her to be so honest, and laid his last few cards on the table, “They will probably call and want her back for Christmas.” He watched carefully as her breathing stuttered.
She tried to shrug the hurt off, “ Fine, but she’ll probably be back with me by the time you get back. Safe and in one piece. ” Phoenix huffed and tugged out her ponytail to angrily redo it, “And we need to talk to them about us taking over full custody because this shit show of back-and-forth is not okay .”
Bob slowly nodded. Finally, he worked up the courage, “Is...is this what you want?”
Phoenix smirked, “You really don’t know, do you?” Her dark eyes were so open, her heart pouring into them.
His eyes flit to her lips, which were slightly parted and red from her worrying them.
“This is what I want.” Phoenix whispered, hoping beyond hope that he’d see it through.
Without a second’s hesitation, Bob took a gentle hold of her neck and pulled her to him, sealing his lips against hers. It was everything and more than he had hoped it would be; her taste and warmth filled his very being. Phoenix didn’t care where they were; she wrapped her arms around his neck and pulled him even closer.
Bob and Phoenix quickly pulled apart when they heard the studio door fly open and the students stampeding out. One of the dads, who was also Navy, gave Bob two thumbs up, having seen the whole thing.
Bob grew bright red and tried to laugh it off. Phoenix rested her chin on his shoulder, her eyes finding his and stealing his breath away.
He offered a nervous smile, “Maybe—maybe we could try that again t-tonight? Ya know, without the chairs, and our audience.”
Phoenix sighed, “I’d like that.”
“Mr. Floyd?” The pair looked up as the instructor, Ms. Jessica, started over, a clipboard in hand, “I still need your payment for Elsa’s recital costume. Oh, is this Mrs. Floyd?” Her smile was full, admiring the pair.
Phoenix looked at Bob with her heart in her eyes and joy filled his very being, “Yeah, this is my wife.” He said, his eyes seeing no one but her.
XxX
Bob finished tucking Elsa in and, as he closed the door, he could feel his palms grow sweaty. Adrenaline shot through him like it did during a mission but, just like then, he pushed through it and continued down the hall towards the looming door where he knew Phoenix waited for him.
He lingered for a moment, teetering between nerves and desire, as he watched the light slipping through the door. With a final, steady breath, he pushed it open.
Bob instantly found his ease, and quite a bit of amusement, when he saw Phoenix standing on top of the small bookshelf, stringing up the last of the fairy lights she had bought months ago when they got his little sign.
Never one to loose stride, Phoenix smirked, “I knew these would come in handy, and you said we didn’t need them...”
Bob laughed and walked over to offer her a hand. She stepped down in front of him, letting their proximity pulse as her body kissed his, “Hi.” She brushed her nose against his, feeling his heart pounding even at a distance.
“Hi.” Bob wasn’t sure what to do but he knew, with Phoenix, he was safe to fumble through.
Slowly, lovingly, she stole a kiss, and savored his body’s reaction as it drew towards hers.
Bob rested his head against hers, “What should I do?” Always the planner.
“Just be with me.” Phoenix reached up and gently caressed his face, “There isn’t any right or wrong way, Robert. It’s just us and figuring it out, together.” Her small smile grew as she remembered what she had said to him all those months ago. They were in this, together, no matter what.
Bob nodded, soaking in her words, and then he surprised her by taking hold of her and kissing her deeply. He had been wanting to do that for months and, now, having had a taste, he couldn’t hold back any longer. Phoenix leaned into him, gently guiding them towards the bed as she smiled against his mouth. Bob’s knee found it first and buckled.
Before he could get flushed, Phoenix snuck between his legs and gently brushed back his hair, distracting him with a kiss as she pulled his glasses off. Bob watched her place them off to the side, the heat in him rising at how smooth and graceful her body moved.
She turned back to him and reached for the lip of his shirt, “You okay?” She waited for him to nod before she pulled it off. Her eyes drank him in, realizing he had more reason than most to show off, but he didn’t. This sight was just for her. She reached up and feathered a touch across the words written over his heart.
“I was made and meant…” Phoenix sighed, tracing the words as she spoke.
Bob’s eyes never left her face, “For you.”
Her smile grew and they both rushed into the kiss. Phoenix crawled onto his lap and grinned. She felt sixteen again and, in a way, they were. There was nothing but this moment, no past and no future, apart from them.
They took their time, savoring as each layer between them was removed, leaving them both bare, body and soul. Phoenix couldn’t help but hum as he traced each of her marks, both intentional and not, and she savored how boldly he met her eye, wanting her to know how much he adored what he found.
Phoenix could feel her body getting impatient and she urged them on, letting the kisses grow instead of linger, and Bob followed her lead.
“Whatever happens, it’s okay.” Phoenix whispered, trailing kissing along his jaw, “It doesn’t have to be perfect to be us.” She waited for him to nod before she carefully brought him to her. His whole body shuttered as they met.
His fingers dug into her side as she continued to claim his kiss. Phoenix’s body responded, desperately pulling him as close as she could. Her hips shifted, tightening her hold, and refusing to let go.
She practically whined when she felt him pull away, his breathing ragged as he tried to get it under control, “What’s wrong?”
“I just…” He chuckled, realizing, for the first time, he could just be himself, “I just don’t want to go too fast.” He let his eyes meet hers, hoping she understood what he meant.
“Well, fast or not,” Phoenix moved to straddle him, savoring the admiration he looked at her with and the soft feel of his hand as he traced her hip, “I was enjoying what we were doing…” Teasingly, she slid back down and smirked when Bob could only nod, “And I know you are too...”
They fell back into it again and Phoenix shifted so he could loom over her once again, trusting him to stay put this time. She nuzzled her head into his as he burrowed it in the crook of her neck, his shoulders flexed under her hands in a feeble attempt to keep his control.
“It’s okay…” Her nose traced his shoulder before she kissed it, wanting to draw him out of his head, “Just be with me.” She closed her eyes, wanting to stay in this moment as long as she could. Their bodies pushed and pulled, matching the other, until their love overtook them both. Phoenix kept her legs gently twisted around his, not wanting him to leave just yet.
She brushed back his sweaty hair and smiled as she pressed her lips against his forehead, “I love you.” Phoenix wasn’t sure he could have looked any happier, but he did.
Bob brushed his nose across her cheek and lovingly kissed her neck, “I love only you.” They chuckled as Phoenix finally relinquished her hold only to quickly reclaiming the warmth of his side, resting her head against his heart as he held her close.
In the hours before dawn released the night, they became the others body, mind, and soul. Masks completely abandoned, they shared anything and everything that ventured through their thoughts and heart. And, they both knew this was how it should always be.
XxX
August went by too quickly and they found themselves standing on the dock before the carrier.
Elsa hugged Bob for as long as she could, her little arms leaving a fleeting impression on the collar of his uniform. The warning call came and he gently set her down, taking great care not to hurt her feelings as he pulled her arms from his neck. She had never seen him off before and it was a lot for her little heart to take, especially since he was going to be missing Christmas again this year.
Bob let his eyes wander to Phoenix as he finished his goodbye with Elsa; his eyes watching how the light caught her dark hair and crowned it in gold. Her arms were crossed, almost in defiance of her feelings.
She shifted as Bob stood and faced her. For a while, she couldn’t look at him, and she almost lost it when he reached out and brushed aside a loose strand of hair from her eyes, “You’ll call every week?”
“Just like I promised.” Bob nodded. He’d spent a small fortune on the prepaid card needed to use the ship’s payphone, but the cost meant little to him. It was the only thing Phoenix had wanted, apart from him coming home safe, and Bob would have done even more if asked.
“Good, because Elsa will miss you.”
He grinned, knowing she preferred these types of games, “Oh, just Elsa?”
Phoenix finally met his eye and Bob saw just how hard it was for her to keep it together, “Don’t make me say it.”
He nodded and leaned over to chastely kiss her cheek. She threw her arms around him instead and pulled him close, letting a few tears escape when he hugged her back even tighter.
The final call sounded and Bob gave her one last kiss, “Six months.” He held her hand as long as he could.
“Six months.” Phoenix caught Elsa before she could run after Bob. She hugged the sobbing girl to her as she watched Bob head up the plank to the carrier. She took a slow breath in and released it even slower, “Six months.”
Once she couldn’t see Bob any longer, Phoenix gently untucked Elsa and brushed back her hair, “I don’t know about you, but I need a taco.”
Through sniffles, Elsa managed, “W-w-with c-cheese?”
“So much cheese!” Phoenix laughed as she stood and took the little girl’s hand. Don’t look back, she told herself, Don’t look back.
Elsa leaned against her leg as they walked along, “Can I sleep with you tonight?”
Phoenix reached down and picked Elsa up, “You can sleep with me every night until Bob gets back.” She kissed the little girl and nestled her into her shoulder. Realizing Elsa was the only piece of Bob that he had left with her, Phoenix hugged her a bit tighter, Six months.
XxX
One month turned in to two and then three. The girls eventually found a routine of their own once Elsa started 1st grade that September. Phoenix was happy to report to Bob and Jean that she was excelling both academically and in the friend department, and she had even won an award for Most Well Behaved and received nothing but praise at her aunt-teacher conference. Elsa had even done so well in her ballet classes that she had earned a small part in the party scene for the studio’s Nutcracker performance that year, which was sure to be the pick-me-up needed with a very prominent member of their little family missing that year.
More and more, Phoenix found herself texting Jean updates and setting up video calls for the three of them since they all felt the emptiness of their respected homes. Bob’s 20minute calls each week meant everything but it always took a day or so for Phoenix to be able to offer a real smile to anyone, even Elsa. Still, she carried on and found a way to make it work.
Everything was as it should be, until it wasn’t.
One late November evening, the door rang and Elsa sprung up from the couch to answer it. Phoenix slowly got up to follow as the little girl threw open the door and squealed, “Daddy!”
During the school conference, Ms. Waller had informed her that Elsa had been telling everyone that Phoenix was her mom, and Elsa had also ended their last few calls to Bob with, “Love you, Daddy” so it was no surprise that Phoenix’s heart raced and her feet rushed expectantly to the front door after hearing the word, “Bob?” Her heart fell when she saw an older man who, while similar in appearance, was not her husband.
“William, actually.” The man’s smile was almost serpentine as he set the little girl down, “Say hello to your mother, Elsa.”
Elsa flung herself at who Phoenix could only guess was Veronica and the perfectly styled woman offered her daughter a pat on the head. It wasn’t with the same affection Bob patted Elsa, but more like how one would greet a dog. Phoenix knew instantly why Elsa had been pretending she was her mom at school; her real mother was the embodiment of Mother Gothel. She even wore a scarlet skirt suit!
“We were surprised to learn she was down here with Robert instead of with Jean, where we left her.” William fixed his expensive cuff as he spoke, “Is Robert here?”
“No, he deployed a couple months ago.” Phoenix could feel the panic beginning to rise in her, remembering Bob’s warning before he had left, “We were granted temporary guardianship after Jean’s heart attack.” The fighter pilot watched closely to see if the man would show any emotion.
He was almost mechanical in his response, “Indeed. Well, Vera and I are back now and we will be taking Elsa back to the city with us for the holidays.”
“I don’t think that would be wise. It’s the middle of the school year and she’s doing quite well—”
“Elsa, go collect your things.” With a wave, Veronica dismissed Elsa, who turned her confused eye to Phoenix, “Now, Elsa.” William took hold of the little girl and forced her to do as she was told. Veronica turned next to Phoenix, “Who are you, again? The nanny?”
“Natasha Floyd.” Phoenix shifted her jaw, feeling her hands flex, “I’m Robert’s wife.”
Phoenix’s tone caused Veronica to finally look up from her phone, “His wife?” Veronica looked Phoenix up and down with a sniff, “Yes, I remember Jean mentioning that. Well, I appreciate you taking care of Elsa while Jean was recovering, but it is almost Christmas and Elsa should really be with her family.”
“How do I even know you’re her parents? You could be kidnappers for all I know!” Phoenix was growing desperate in her panic, and they both knew it.
“Does Elsa greet every man who comes to your door as ‘Daddy’?” Veronica looked down her nose at Phoenix as William and Elsa appeared around the corner with her little suitcase and backpack.
“We’ll send for the rest of her things after the holidays.” William bid as he walked Elsa out the door and towards the awaiting taxi. He ignored Elsa’s request to stay with Phoenix or even say goodbye and drug her down the walkway. The little girl was too scared to make a fuss after getting a very heavy handed reprimand in her room and she looked back at Phoenix with pleading eyes.
“No…” Phoenix tried to follow but Veronica stepped in front of her and one look at their security detail showed they meant business. Phoenix knew she didn’t stand a chance, “You can’t!” Tears began to blur her vision as she watched William shove Elsa into the car. Her chest heaved, feeling absolutely devastated that she couldn’t say goodbye. She hoped that Elsa could somehow feel just how much Phoenix loved her and how desperately her thoughts were working, trying to find a way to get her back, “Please!”
Veronica held out a piece of paper, her ruby lips like blood, “For your troubles.”
Phoenix looked at the check and, for a moment, her anger overcame her sorrow. She narrowed her eyes, “Keep it.”
“Very well.” Veronica tucked it back in her purse and started for the taxi with a final little wave, “It was nice meeting you, Natalie.”
Phoenix couldn’t even begin to describe the storm brewing inside of her as she watched the taxi pull out and she saw little Elsa peering out the window with her hand pressed against the glass. It consumed her very being and threatened to tear her apart from the inside out until nothing was left but ash and soot.
“No...no...no…”
She flew back into the house and tore around for her phone. She finally found her cell phone completely dead and she grabbed for the landline. She slid to the floor, her chest heaving as it rung. Finally, it went through.
“Jean! Oh, thank God! They—” Her voice broke and the sob grew, “They took her!”
“Oh, Natasha, I am so sorry. I tried calling but I got your voicemail every time. I am so sorry, my dear.”
The emotions became too much and the storm broke, her heartache loud and echoing in the empty house. Jean stayed on the phone with her all night, even after Phoenix had worn herself out and her body forced her to sleep.
XxX
“Phee!”
The call shot her awake and she clutched the phone.
“Natasha, is everything alright?”
Phoenix futzed with the receiver and finally got it to her ear, “Y-yes, I—” Her eyes caught sight of Rooster as he came around the bend, “I’m fine, but I have to go, I’ll call you tonight. Love you.”
Phoenix let the phone drop as Rooster knelt beside her, checking her over, “I saw the door and…” He breathed a sigh of relief as he gently framed her face, “They have been trying to call you all morning.”
Her veins turned to ice, knowing exactly who they were.
“It’s not that! No, Bob’s fine, he just took a hit.” Rooster hurried to get out. Relief instantly filled her and spilled over in tears; Rooster hugged her close, “They said something about his next of kin being his wife and I said I’d handle the notification when I heard the name.” He offered a small smile as he pulled back to look at her, hoping to ease the tension, “You got some explaining to do, Lieutenant Floyd.”
He was rewarded with a smile as she waved him away, “Later. Where are they taking him?”
“They have him inbound. Their engine took a hit and blew during a test run, a large piece of shrapnel impaled his arm. He’s really lucky, the pilot didn’t survive.”
They had started to get up while he told her the news and she felt herself swaying towards the end. Thankfully, Rooster was there to steady her.
“I...I need to be there…”
“Whoa, whoa, it’s gonna take a few hours for them to get here and they’ll probably rush him into surgery. Why don’t you shower and then you can tell me what’s going on?”
Phoenix went into autopilot, her well trained instincts taking over, and she followed orders. She only paused, letting her emotions surface for just a moment, when she saw the little sign on Bob’s bedside table.
XxX
“So, you married Bob so he could get custody of his little sister, and his parents, who thought you were the nanny, came and forcibly took her from you last night?”
Phoenix sighed, rubbing her temples as he drove through base, “Yep, that’s about it.”
“I knew you two would end up together.”
“What?” Phoenix looked at her best friend, curious what he had seen and why he hadn’t said anything before now, “Why?”
Rooster shrugged, “Just a feeling. You two fit, if that makes sense.”
“Yeah, it does.” She nodded as she leaned back, the hospital sign coming into view, “It really does.”
“Are you sure you don’t want me to come in with you?”
“Roos, I love you, but this is my mission and I fly singles.” Phoenix leaned over and kissed his cheek.
“You fly solo, huh? Might want to tell Bob that…”
She whacked him before she hopped out of the car and waved him off. It took everything in her not to run inside and demand answers. Instead, she started for the front door and checked in, appearing much more in control than she was.
She found out that Rooster had been right and that they had taken Bob straight into surgery when he got in. It was another two hours before the doctor came out, “Mrs. Floyd? Oh, my apologies, Lieutenant Floyd?”
“Yes?” She stood and started forward, keeping to presentation protocol even while her heart raced.
The young doctor offered a soft smile, “It went really well, we were able to remove everything and it looks like it should heal without issue. Though, we won’t know if there is any permanent nerve damage until your husband’s awake. He’s in room 1221, you can take the elevator there, top floor.”
Phoenix rushed a quick thank you before headed for the stairs, needing the hit of endorphins. Once she got to the floor and found the right door, she found herself frozen in place.
It wasn’t only because Bob was laying unconscious on the other side, having just come through an extensive surgery, but because she wasn’t sure she would be able to keep it together for him, not after everything that had happened the past 24 hours.
“You got this, you are the best fighter pilot there is, you can do anything. Now, go, just go!”
She pushed open the door without another thought and peered in. A persistent beeping came from a machine and she rounded the curtain to see Bob hooked to it, his arm freshly wrapped and his stitches already bleeding through it.
Phoenix stopped short, crossing her arms to shield herself.
As if he could sense her, Bob began to stir. Without his glasses, he could only take a guess, but he knew it was the right one, “Natasha?”
She nearly broke at his voice and she hurried to his side, “Yeah, it’s me.”
“Oh, good, I was worried you might have found a Jody of your own.”
Phoenix offered a little laugh as she took his hand in both of hers, needing to make sure he was real and he was safe, “Nope, no Jodies. Just a heartbroken wife waiting for her sailor to get home.”
She had tried so hard to hold it back, but Bob was waking up enough to piece it together, “Where’s Elsa?”
“Oh, she—she’s fine.”
He laid his head back with a sigh, “They took her?” His eyes wandered to the window, remembering that Thanksgiving was next week.
Silent tears trailed down her face as she nodded and she dropped her head onto the bed. Sobs wracked her body when she felt his fingers gently running through her hair, hoping to sooth her.
“They took her, Robert, they took our girl.”
“I know, Natasha, I know.”
S he had been so strong for so long on her own that she broke when she finally had him there to help shoulder the load. But, it was safe in this little world of two and, as she let her fingers cling to the blanket separating Bob from her, she let herself simply be with him .
XxX
Bob was released at the end of the week, but whether it was because he was healing quicker than expected or the doctors were tired of Phoenix commandeering the entire floor was anyone’s guess.
Phoenix kicked open the door and heaved his bag inside as Bob followed. He lingered at the door, his eyes slowly roaming over everything they could.
Her eyes lit up, curious what he was thinking, “What?”
“It’s just…” Bob shrugged, trying to hide behind that quiet smile once again, “I’m home, aren’t I?”
Phoenix dropped the bag and started towards him, gently framing his face, “Ya, you’re home.”
He sighed and covered her hand with his, “So, you don’t want to...to go back to how thing were?” He grimaced, knowing how lame that sounded, “You could have your own life back, not have to worry about anything, anyone.”
“Not a chance.” Phoenix drew him close and kissed him, “You’re stuck with me.”
Bob smiled as she pulled back, “Promise?”
She took his pinky in hers and held the entwined pair up, “Promise.”
XxX
With the extent of his injury, Bob wouldn’t be returning for the final three months of the mission and the Navy offered him an early retirement, which he happily accepted.
“You sure this is what you want?” The question had become automatic, something Phoenix asked every time she thought of it, “If you want to stay active, I’m sure we could make it work.”
“Yeah, actually…” Bob rubbed his neck, too shy to meet her eye, “I really liked staying home with Elsa.”
At first, his comment surprised Phoenix, but, as she thought about it, it made perfect sense, and she joked, “Is there something you need to tell me? Any little surprises in the oven?”
“Not that I’m aware of.” He chuckled, “I just know how my dad and Veronica are. They’ll drop Elsa off sometime in February so they can go on some special Valentine’s trip and the cycle will repeat. Since I’m retired, I’ll be ready to fly up and get her whenever that happens.”
Phoenix huffed, “This isn’t right, Robert. Elsa needs stability, security, especially now that she’s in school. And, if you saw how that woman treated her...” Her eyes met Bob’s, “She needs a home, Robert.”
Bob nodded, knowing exactly what she meant.
XxX
Phoenix sat at the gate, bouncing her knee. It had already been the plan to take Christmas off and fly up to Montana but she was supposed to be going with Elsa instead of Bob. While she was thrilled to have him home for Christmas, she couldn’t help the ache she felt.
“We’ll probably get to see her.” Bob squeezed her hand, “Dad always likes to make an appearance to makes sure Jean doesn’t write him out of the will.”
If Phoenix didn’t know he was being serious, she would have laughed. Instead, she leaned back and rested her head against the wall. She wasn’t sure which would be worse: getting to see Elsa and having her taken away again, or not seeing her at all.
XxX
“My loves!”
Bob hurried up the stairs before Jean could start down them and hugged her, always putting her well being over his. Phoenix followed closely behind him, making sure his shoulder hadn’t jostled too much, before hugging Jean.
“Looks like there is someone else dying to see you, too.” Tears started to brighten Jean’s eyes as she looked over their shoulder to where a Mercedes had pulled in.
Bob squeezed Phoenix’s shoulder as they saw Elsa squirming to get out of her car seat. Veronica was tutting already and, somehow, the little girl managed to free herself enough to push past her mother once the door was open.
The girl sprinted towards Phoenix, calling out her and Bob’s names, and flung herself into the pilot’s waiting arms. Phoenix held her close, kissing her head, as Bob wrapped his good arm around them.
“You got hurt?” Elsa tugged at the sling he still wore as she snuggled close to Phoenix.
“‘Tis but a scratch.”
Phoenix smirked, “Bit more than a scratch.”
Elsa was old enough to realize the adults weren’t being completely honest and she clung to Phoenix, “I missed you.”
“Not as much as we missed you!” Phoenix nestled her close. Bob turned as his father and his wife made their way over and, always one for manners, moved to greet them.
“We heard you had gotten hurt, Robert. It looks like you are recovering well.” William stated. Phoenix was pretty sure if the man showed any sympathy for others, he might explode.
Veronica offered a polite hello and quickly took her hand back. She looked at Phoenix and Elsa, “Really, Elsa, it’s like you were raised in a barn.”
Phoenix knit her brow, wondering what Veronica was getting at. Bob had a guess as to what was coming and took the precaution to wrap an arm around Phoenix’s stomach, even though he was pretty sure she wouldn’t lunge at the woman with Elsa in her arms.
“If only you were a bit older, we could send you to St. Mary’s and get some of those edge’s filed down. Maybe if we offered a donation, William?”
Jean could see where this was headed as Phoenix’s eyes narrowed and she stepped in, “Tea?”
XxX
Elsa refused to let go of Phoenix for the next hour, and then she latched onto Bob’s leg and wouldn’t let him go for the next two. William was talking about his favorite topic, himself, to anyone who was standing near, whether they were listening or not, and Veronica had been on some sort of call since their terse greeting.
Phoenix stood in the kitchen, her eyes lingering on Bob as he sat on the floor with Elsa playing Candy Land.
“How are you doing, sweetie?”
Phoenix jumped but eased into a smile when she saw Jean, “I’m fine.” Jean stared her down and Phoenix sighed, “Okay, not fine, but it’s not like we can do anything about it.”
“There might be.”
Phoenix’s heart rushed, the hope stirred, but she was quick to quiet it.
Jean turned to Phoenix, her gaze steady, “Is this what you really want, though?”
Phoenix knew how much hung on her next words and she answered without hesitation, “I’m not sure I’ve ever wanted anything more.” Her eyes found Bob and she smiled, realizing there might have been one thing she wanted more, but she already had it, so she called it a tie.
“Okay.” Jean poured herself a cup of coffee and headed back to the living room, leaving Phoenix wondering what she had planned.
XxX
Bob woke up when he felt movement at the end of the bed. Blinking a few times, he could just make out the little blur.
“I—I had a bad dream.” Elsa whimpered as she crawled up the bed.
Phoenix stirred and moved so the little girl could fit between her and Bob, “What about?”
“That Mommy and Daddy took me far away and I never saw you again.” Elsa sniffled, burrowing into Phoenix’s arms, “And there were spiders.”
“Not spiders!” Phoenix brushed back her hair, trying to sooth her. Bob looked over the mess of curls and raised a brow in question. Phoenix responded with a look.
“The bed’s not big enough for three.”
Bob would regret that comment since it led to all three of them sleeping on the floor since he couldn’t, in good conscious, stay in the bed while Phoenix slept on the floor with Elsa.
XxX
“Breakfast!”
Phoenix popped awake and realized she was sandwiched by Floyds; Elsa was tucked in her arms while she was tucked in Bob’s. Phoenix snuggled the little girl close, realizing that it was actually a trio of Floyds instead of a sandwich.
Elsa rubbed at her eyes with a big yawn, “Pancakes?”
“Hmm, with that blueberry jam Jean makes?” Phoenix’s stomach growled in response.
“And chocolate chips!” Elsa started to squirm and took off, realizing there was a sugar rush waiting for her.
Phoenix laughed and started to get up only to be pulled back down and hugged even tighter. She smiled as she snuck a peek at her husband, who wasn’t quite ready to get up.
“There’s probably coffee, too.”
Bob twitched his nose, his eyes still closed, “Sleep.”
“Up.”
“No.”
“Well, you shouldn’t have married a morning person then!” Phoenix playfully wiggling herself out of his arms and he groaned, trying to grab her back.
Finally, he admitted defeat and laid back on the hard floor, “You’re worth it though.” It wasn’t really coherent, it didn’t make much sense, but Phoenix realized Bob had shared more than he had meant to. He shared something he was longing to hear, too.
Lovingly, she leaned back and brushed back his hair, “You are, too.” She nuzzled her nose against his cheek and kissed it, “I hope you know that.”
His sleepy eyes finally opened and he smiled up at her.
XxX
William cleared his throat as he walked into the kitchen, very much looking like a disciplined child told he was going to make a public apology. Phoenix shoveled another bite of pancake in her mouth as she let Bob take lead on saying a polite, “good morning.”
“So, Mom and I were talking and we, that is, Vera and I, think it might be for the best if you and Natasha take over permanent custody of Elsa. Our business has us going in all sorts of directions during the year, as you know, and, with our big merge coming up, we would lose a lot of momentum and revenue if we had to pull back to manage Elsa’s school schedule and all. It would be a great help to us if you would take her on full time, if that is something you are willing to do, of course.”
Phoenix’s fork clattered off her plate and onto the floor.
Bob sat back, never one to show his hand, “Are you sure that’s what you and Veronica want?”
Phoenix didn’t miss the little exchange between William and Jean, which was over in the blink of an eye, and the pilot turned to Jean, who just winked at her.
“Of course we would still like to see her as often as we can. You know how busy we are, but we’d like to still see her at Christmas, and her birthday. Maybe we could even take her on a trip when she’s older, it’s a bit hard flying with someone her age, you understand.”
“Yes, it is.” Bob never let his gaze waver. He respected his father, as his grandparents had raised him to, but he knew that he was no longer that little boy who needed his father’s approval. He was a man with a family of his own and he had his own lines now. He silently checked with Phoenix, who nodded, before he turned back to his father, “We will take over custody.”
William nodded, clearing his throat as he fixed his cuff, “I will have the papers drawn up and we can sign them after the holidays.”
“Her school starts back on the 9th.” Phoenix asserted, “I think she should remain at the farm for the rest of the break and fly down with us.”
“Very well.”
Phoenix leaned back, knowing Christmas had definitely come early this year.
“Yes, well, Veronica and I are going to head into town.” Without any further adieu, William took his leave.
Phoenix watched him go, wondering what had just happened.
Bob looked at his grandmother, who walked over and kissed his head, “Will they be able to sue us for duress?”
Jean laughed, “All I told him was that I was thinking about updating my will so that you got everything when I kick the bucket since you had been so helpful with Elsa this last year, and that it makes me so proud to see that you had become a man like your grandfather, who puts family above self. A couple more hints and my point was made but, I think any attorney would be hard pressed to prove duress.”
Bob offered a small smile as Jean gave him a final squeeze of the shoulder and shuffled out.
Phoenix leaned over and rested her head against his shoulder, “She’s right, ya know.”
“About the lawyer?” He smirked.
His wife elbowed him, “You know what I mean.”
“Thank you, Natasha.” Bob looked at her evenly, making sure she understood, “I don’t think I’ve said that enough.”
They rested their foreheads against the other’s and Phoenix breathed, “Any time.”
XxX
Christmas was filled with more joy and laughter than either Bob or Phoenix ever remembered it having before; it was everything it was supposed to be and more.
Even as excited as Elsa was to be returning with Bob and Phoenix, saying goodbye to her parents was still hard on her young, confused heart and she cried in Phoenix’s arms for close to an hour. Bob felt guilty because he couldn’t help but wonder if either one of them would ever see their father again since his inheritance was now secured. But, Bob knew it didn’t matter what his father did or didn’t do, because one look at his girls told him he had chosen the right path, one that would hold more love and joy than his father’s ever would.
Phoenix was in much the same frame of mind, until they got back and found her orders waiting for her.
That night, Bob hugged her close like he always did, “It’s only four months, it’s a really short mission.” Whether he was consoling her or himself, he wasn’t sure.
“What if they extend it?” Her heart raced. Not only would she be gone for four months, but she’d also be missing Elsa’s birthday.
“Then they extend it. We’ll still be here either way.” Bob lovingly traced his nose down her neck, “You were born to fly, and you love your job. It will be okay.”
Phoenix’s fingers dug into the pillow, But I love you more.
XxX
If Elsa had been upset when Bob left, she was inconsolable when it came time to see Phoenix off. One of the moms from Elsa’s ballet class, who was married to a sailor, stepped in to distract the little ballerina so Bob and Phoenix could say their goodbye.
“And you promise you’ll call every week?” Bob poked.
Phoenix rolled her eyes and moved to fix his collar, “Of course, gotta make sure I don’t give those Jodies any in.”
“Never.” Bob pulled her in for a deep kiss and Phoenix felt her body respond. They were both running on little sleep, having not wanted to waste a moment together last night, and she still felt like she might have another round in her.
The final call came.
Phoenix picked up her bag, “Four months.”
“Four months.” Bob collected Elsa and hoisted her up to wave Phoenix off. Phoenix continued to watch as long as she could and it nearly broke her when she lost them in the crowd. She rushed to one of the ports and stared out, trying to get a final glimpse.
“Four months.” She breathed.
XxX
“I think you might be up for Uncle of the Year, Bob, I might even hire you to plan my birthday party this year.” Ms. Jessica praised as she headed into the studio to set up the game while the girls finished decorating their pointe shoe cookies.
Bob quietly accepted the compliment with a smile. His eyes wandered around the small studio, feeling a hint of pride at how well he had pulled off the Rapunzel-ballet themed birthday party Elsa had asked for. A twinge caught him, wishing Phoenix was there to see it.
They had a call scheduled for later that night but those were a mixed blessing. In a way, it shortened the distance between them, but it also was a sharp reminded of it. Bob knew Phoenix had sacrificed a great deal during his last deployment, but he hadn’t realized just how much until he had experienced it himself. Somehow, she had always made it seem so easy in their emails, and he was left in awe of her one more.
Over the last three months, he’d had nothing but time to think about the last year and all the times she had said “I love you” without saying a word. Now, the final stretch was in sight and he couldn’t wait till she was home so he could show her just how much he loved her too.
His thoughts were interrupted as Ms. Jessica called the girls and herded them into the studio for a couple games. Bob moved to watch with the rest of the parents as the girls were taught some dance combination with bright purple and yellow ribbons. He smiled when he saw Elsa twirling around in the center of the group in her little Rapunzel dress, a small Pascal pinned to her shoulder and flowers precariously tucked in her braid. Bob wasn’t sure he had ever seen her so happy and that meant everything.
“Bob?” Marie Miles, whose husband was deployed with Phoenix, tapped him on the shoulder, “Should I start setting out the food?”
“Oh, I can do that.” He smiled, pulling out a chair for her, “You really shouldn’t be on your feet.”
Marie smiled and carefully folded herself and her ever-growing bump into the chair, “You don’t have to tell me twice!” She laughed.
Bob snuck pass and headed for the hall to finish setting things up. He took care laying out the spread, remembering everything Jean had taught him from the countless Thanksgivings and Christmases he helped with growing up.
“You should put the cupcakes at the end, give the veggie tray a fighting chance.”
Bob grinned but didn’t look up as he swapped the platters. He’d discovered over the last few months that, the more he missed Phoenix, the more his thoughts worked to keep her present. It was a small comfort that made day-to-day life a bit easier as he held down the fort.
Once he was finished, he turned around and what he saw froze him in place. It was easy to hear what Phoenix might say in any given situation, or picture her expression, but he’d never envisioned her standing before him so fully like he did now. He blinked once, twice, to make sure it wasn’t a trick of the eyes.
Phoenix pulled off her cover and tucked it under her arm, “I know it’s been three months, but I haven’t changed that much, have I?” She smirked.
Bob’s smile grew, realizing she was real, and they rushed towards each other, meeting in the middle. Phoenix’s arms wrapped tightly around his neck and he hugged her even closer but something felt different and Bob pulled back, trying to figure out what it was.
Phoenix grinned, “My CO wasn’t comfortable with me flying in my condition.” She unbuttoned her jacket and turned to the side, showing off the very beginnings of a bump.
His eyes grew to the size of his glasses as he looked between her and the bump, “Y-your…your…we’re...” He looked at her and she nodded as she took his hand and placed it on their growing baby. Bob brought his other hand up to cradle it, joy filling his face. He couldn’t find the words; he wasn’t sure what he had done to deserve this much happiness and the love that filled her face as she looked at him would always steal his breath.
“Guess we had a bit too much fun that final night.” Phoenix laughed.
He laughed, the start of tears fogging his glasses, “I guess we did.” His eyes wandered to her face, “How are you feeling though? How long will they keep you on shore duty?”
Phoenix’s heart swelled, realizing, not for the first time, that Bob was the only one for her. Never had she been with someone so considerate of her wants and desires. He knew how much flying meant to her, and, for that, he would temper whatever he felt to tend to her. She wasn’t sure what she had done to deserve such happiness, either.
“Actually, an instructor position opened up and I’ve been thinking about applying for it. I already asked Mav if he’d be alright recommending me.”
Bob’s smile brightened his face even more if that were possible, “So, you’ll be home?”
“Yeah, I’ll be home.” Phoenix reached up and gently framed his face, “With my family.” Tears threatened to spill over when she realized that she had finally gotten what she had always wanted: a family to call her own.
Bob took gentle hold of her neck and pulled her to him, resting his head against hers.
“Let’s not tell Elsa yet, though. Today’s her day.” Phoenix squeezed his hand before kissing its palm.
Bob nodded, too speechless for words, and the pair started towards the studio. Bob snuck in front, hiding Phoenix from view, and popped open the door, “Elsa? I have a surprise for you.”
Elsa tilted her head, trying to figure out what it might be, and she started over to him. Phoenix stepped out from behind his shoulder and Elsa’s face erupted with joy, just as Bob’s had a few minutes before, and she sprinted towards Phoenix. Phoenix caught the little girl and swung her around.
Phoenix wasn’t sure how long they stood like that before the little girl wiggled out of her arms and claimed her hand to pull her over to her friends, “This is my Mom! Like Charlie’s mom.” Elsa turned her big blue eyes back to Phoenix and the pilot’s breath caught, “She wanted me when my real mom didn’t.” Elsa wrapped her little arms around Phoenix’s leg and hugged it to her tightly.
Phoenix reached down and picked her up once more, snuggling her close. Bob made his way over and gently rested his head against Phoenix’s. His hand snuck under her jacket and lovingly cradled the small bump, his contented sigh saying everything he couldn’t.
And Phoenix closed her eyes and whispered, “It’s good to be home.”
XxX