Chapter Text
Childhood memories stick throughout one's life. And Devon had plenty of memories he held dear.
His first bike. And how his father taught him how to ride. All the times his mother asked for help in the kitchen. She'd sing a song he knew by heart while the smell of palak paneer filled the space. The moments they'd all gather in front of the TV, watching the show they all loved. Laughing together.
There were other memories, though. Buried so deep, long forgotten and kept for years, he would only recall them in specific situations.
For instance, the sweet memory of his mother's nest. How she'd hug him when he was a baby, until he stopped crying, until he fell asleep. The amount of pillows and blankets, all smelling perfectly of his family, surrounded him. It was such a sweet remembrance, that feeling of this little pack he had in this world.
And now, moving away to live in another city, and for good this time, he couldn't help but recall it all. How he'd be alone. No pack to call his own, at least not close by. And an empty nest of his own.
***
The apartment he rented in Atlanta wasn't too big, but he's lived in smaller places.
It was close to Chastain, though. A bus ride away. Devon was excited to start this new chapter of his life – working in a hospital, with real cases, real people. Truly, he couldn't see himself doing anything else, even if he had to face some obstacles.
Especially if he had an obstacle in the form of an alpha who happened to be his resident.
Conrad Hawkins was an excellent doctor, there was no denying it, even if Devon hadn't seen him working for long. Hawkins knew what he was doing and he wanted Devon to learn too, so he pushed and yelled and demanded too much , but always offered a proud smile in the end. Truth is, one could question Conrad's methods, though not his results, and although Devon hated it at first, slowly, he started to notice how much he's improved.
Still, whenever the scent of burnt wood and oranges got close enough, the omega hid a sigh and got ready for whatever insanity Conrad would ask of him.
Luckily, the others were much easier to approach.
Nic had taken Devon in fast, with her kind yet firm nature. Irving was probably one of the best companions he's had ever since he started, attached to the hip, the two of them. He was half terrified and half impressed by Mina every now and then, but she opened up eventually. Jessica was such a sweetheart, even when she was messing with him. And AJ would smile at him when passing by and invite him to watch his operations when he thought Devon would like it.
It felt different from his friends at university. It felt different from being under his parents’ wings. And yet, there was a growing feeling on him whenever they spent time together, that all consuming sensation of, finally, belonging.
He hadn't realized what it meant until one morning.
“You seemed to have adapted well to these.” Jessica said, shaking her box of suppressant pills. Every month, Chastain would provide all their omega workers with their suppressants, free of charge.
“Yeah.” Staring at his own box of pills, Devon followed her. “I used to take them in med school, so I’m used to it.”
He couldn't hide his laughter when Jessica made a face at him.
“I know. They can be awful in the beginning.”
“Oh, don't even tell me. It just messed with my whole schedule.” Scrunching up her nose, she pouted. “But then again, I was never the kind to try suppressants.”
“Most of my omega colleagues didn't like it either.” A painful memory came over then. He tried not to think about it. “They said they'd postpone it until mandatory. I just decided to get used to it first, you know, as it's required at hospitals.”
“The boy genius.” She sighed, dreamily, and he chuckled. “I mean, I get it, we're working with people and all of that…”
“And it's necessary to regulate our heats.”
“But couldn't they just give us some scent blocker and let us be?”
She was still pouting. Devon shook his head. Her scent of cherries was muted but it was still there: joyful as usual. From how closely they've been working in the last three months, he'd naturally get some input from her scent, even with them both being on suppressants.
“I don't know if I'd like to work in a place where I couldn't smell anyone.” He mumbled, still thinking about how much (or how little, but still there) he could sense from her. Maybe all the others could catch something or another from his scent as well. “It's part of us. Scent blockers make us feel like…”
“Like we're not humans.”
“Exactly. We can't tell what people are feeling or… you know, who they are.”
Seemingly thinking about it, Jessica followed him to the elevator, waiting for it in silence. Devon simply looked at her.
“I know it's bad, but in the end, suppressants might just be our best option.”
The omega had a small smile on her face when she looked back at him.
“Guess you're right.” She finally said, hands in her pockets. “Well, at least Chastain lets us have our heats every semester. I heard Atlanta General only allows their omegas a heat-leave after a whole year.”
Devon grimaced at that and found his expression mirrored on Jessica. “Really? No wonder there are so few omega doctors there.”
They entered the elevator as soon as the doors dinged open, pressing the button to the ER floor. They were both scheduled there for the day, after all. Devon didn't like staring, but he couldn't help taking in the omega friend next to him: it felt so good to have someone who could understand him in those matters.
“Speaking of heat-leaves…” The silence was interrupted by Jessica. “Mine is in a few days.”
Devon hummed. “Still have about three months before mine hits.”
“You’ve got time to prepare then.” At Devon's nod, she looked down. “You know, Nic lent me her blanket.” When he said nothing, Jessica continued. “She said it was hers and her sister's when they were young.”
“That's really nice of her.”
That wasn't unusual: packmates always lent a piece of cloth with their scent to omegas before nesting, so they could be surrounded by their smell. Even though Nic was a beta, she was still the leader of the pack, so of course she'd be the first to give Jessica something.
“Irving gave me a nice cushion too…” There was a small smile on Jessica's face, which she quickly hid. It seemed like there was more she wanted to say, but she decided against it. “And Conrad sent me some granola bars with a blanket. I might keep just the blanket.” They both laughed. “Oh, and Mina made me socks! Can you believe it?”
Her happiness was contagious. “I'm glad everyone is helping with your nest.”
“Well…”
Jessica wasn't a shy person at all, always the straightforward nurse, but she seemed to be looking for her words. When she looked back at Devon as if she was expecting something, a frown marred his face.
“Almost everyone.”
And then it hit him.
The elevator doors were about to open when he rushed to hit the ‘close doors’ button.
“You…” he was staring at her. “You want me to give you something?”
With raised shoulders, she nodded. “Yeah. I mean, you're an omega too, it's nice to have another omega scent as well.”
“You would want my scent?” He was still stuck on that.
“Uh…” She was confused by his reaction. “Well, yes, Devon.” She replied with a shrug. “You're pack too.”
Jessica probably had no idea what it meant for him to hear that. He was pack too . It was the first time anyone has ever said that to him, the first time anyone has ever explicitly asked for his scent when nesting. None of his omega friends had ever wanted that from him, and as consequence, he'd never expected to be offered something like that either.
And then there was Jessica, making it look so simple he couldn't help but rush to her, hugging her tightly, the smell of cherries filling his nose, an honest smile on his face.
“I'll take that as a yes?” There was laughter in her voice.
“You can bet on it.”
When the elevator doors opened, no one understood why they were still hugging. If Jessica noticed the way his eyes were slightly damp, though, she didn't mention.
***
Devon first learned about nesting in school.
Biology classes were mandatory to cover all things heat and rut related, and for everyone at that: alphas, betas or omegas. Heats were to happen every three months, and nesting was a big part of it – ensuring a safe space for the omega (and their partner, if so they chose) as well as any child they might want. It would last a couple of days until the heat truly started. All perfectly calculated.
And the scents one had on it made the biggest difference.
For teens, the scent of their family would suffice most of the time, but many would usually have something from their closest friends as well. It wasn't unusual to see some of his colleagues exchanging stuffed toys or cushions with their friends: they may not grasp the idea of a pack completely, but it was the beginning of it.
And having a safe space, surrounded by the scents of the people one loved, was the perfect idea of a nest.
Devon remembered all about that class. There had been this fascination upon learning about hormones, about scents one would give, the way they just complemented others, how the body would change and grow. Notebook filled with notes, Devon decided right then, maybe that's what he'd like to study further.
Unfortunately, school covers only the practical side of the thing.
By the age of fifteen, Devon woke up feeling so cold he couldn't help but wrap himself under one of his old quilts, shivering while feeling like crying. He knew his temperature was below normal and it should have clicked, it really should, but he couldn't focus on much other than this sudden need to grab all the pillows and blankets in the house until his temperature came to a normal warm level again.
So his mind had barely allowed him time to contemplate what was going on, except for the fact there was something missing, something he didn't have, and a horrible feeling crawled up his chest.
His mother found him hours later, body still too cold and shivering, cramping up badly and sobbing in the middle of a disastrous attempt at a nest.
“Oh, raja beta …” Her voice helped, somehow. “You're presenting, my love. You're an Omega.”
Tears of happiness welled up in her eyes and Devon hugged her. Miraculously, his pain stopped. When his father arrived, he immediately grabbed one of his pillows and Himaya’s blankets and brought it to Devon's room.
He hadn't realized how much he needed their scents until he had it. Comfortably buried in the nest, smelling of his pack. It wasn't perfect. But it was the best thing he's ever had.
***
It's been some months since he's used his Kantha quilt.
Getting it from a hidden space in his closet, Devon washed it before letting it dry in the sun. It was a simple design, mostly consisting of yellow and orange, but it brought back memories nonetheless. It had been, after all, the quilt he had on himself when he first presented and one he has kept for his nests ever since.
So he slept in it that night, tightly holding it around himself. The next day was his day off, therefore, he did some cleaning and cooked something easy. He could almost see Mina’s head shake at his Mac and cheese and Nic's muffled laughter.
Well. It was natural to remember his friends like that. He knew at least Jessica considered him part of her pack. Who knew? Maybe the others wouldn't take long to consider him as well. He truly liked them all.
(He heard Conrad's voice too. Complaining he should eat better, something healthier. They had been getting closer recently and something inside the omega was happy and nervous about it at the same time. So Devon did his best to ignore the voice and the feeling, munching on his Mac and cheese. It didn't taste good.)
It was around the end of the afternoon that his phone rang. His mother's name on the display, Devon sighed, an idea of how the conversation would go already on his mind.
As usual, he hoped he was wrong.
“ Raja beta, ” his mother's excited voice rang. “How have you been?”
“Good.” Grabbing his quilt, he made it to his living room, sitting on the sofa. “You and dad?”
“Missing you dearly, Devon.”
That brought a smile to his lips, but it was short lived.
“Your heat is approaching, isn't it?”
It wasn't, not with the suppressants. He'd still have three months before he had to worry about it, yet, explaining to his mother might not be easy. She wouldn't understand postponing a heat, but then again, there was much she didn't understand.
When he didn't answer, she tried another question.
“Have you found an alpha for you yet?”
Hiding how much he wanted to scoff, he simply sighed. Apparently, his hopes had been in vain: he knew it wouldn't be long until the subject was brought up. First, talking about finding an alpha, then bonding, mating and, finally, kids. Massaging his forehead, he took a deep breath.
“No, mom.” Before she could say anything, he talked over her. “I've been working a lot lately. Haven't really had the time.”
“Don't you have alphas in that hospital?” She sounded almost offended, as if it was absurd no alpha would look twice at her son. “ Beta , it's good to find someone soon.”
“It’s not that simple. Especially not at work.” Not with the alpha scent of Conrad so close to him – and there went his good mood. Closing his eyes, he made a decision. “Listen, I gotta go, okay? I'll call you later this week.”
Waiting for her (lengthy) farewell, he decided he'd catch some sleep early. His head pounded with the beginning of a headache and he wondered if it was the discussion or the Mac and cheese. Probably both.
Lying on his bed, making sure his quilt was perfectly surrounding him – after all, he needed it to smell like him – , it didn't take Devon long to sleep.
***
Chastain’s hallways were packed with patients, the ER the usual organized chaos Irving managed. Devon hadn't been paged, but as he decided to arrive a bit earlier, he'd have to deal with all the mess that's been there.
He only needed to do one thing first.
Checking the clock, he realized Jessica was about to leave. Holding a paper bag with his beloved quilt on it, smelling of him from the last two days he's kept it, he turned to make his way to the break room.
“Where are you going?”
It had to be Conrad, of course. Devon stared at him then, feeling just bold enough to raise the bag he was carrying.
“Trying to give this to Jessica before she leaves.” With a raised eyebrow, he watched as Conrad frowned.
“It's…” Conrad approached him, taking fast steps. “what, an early lunch?”
He wasn't exactly comfortable sharing what it was with his resident , but Conrad was asking and being a pain, so maybe that'd teach him a lesson about meddling.
“No.” He took a deep breath and hated himself instantly. Conrad was too close. “It's my blanket.”
He was half expecting Conrad to scold him for something. Instead, the alpha looked at the bag and, upon breathing in, his shoulders relaxed minutely.
“Oh,” his voice had a different cadence then, something warmer. Aligned with his scent of burnt wood, always so heated, it fitted perfectly. Devon didn't want to think further on that. “That's… that's really nice of you.”
He sounded almost unsure. Not as if he didn't think it was nice, but as if he was studying Devon's intentions on that. Devon wasn't inclined to have an omega partner, especially when Jessica was such a good friend who's called him pack . So he waited for anything else and, when nothing came, he turned to go again.
“She'll like it.”
It was all Conrad said. Devon looked at him and, upon realizing he was being honest, decided to be honest too.
“I hope so.”
Jessica was about to leave when Devon finally entered the break room.
It was the end of her shift: she looked tired and a bit stressed, but still held a small smile so typical of her. When he raised the bag and she noticed what was inside, she hugged him so tightly that Devon knew he had done the right thing. Her muted scent of cherries had changed a bit, having something of a whipped cream on it. It was her last day before her leave.
“Thank you.” Her gratitude was palpable. Devon shook his head.
“No. Thank you.”
If he thought she wouldn't understand, maybe he underestimated her. There was a glint in her eyes that said too much. Devon went back to the ER not long after that, saying goodbye again. He felt lighter than he had in weeks. Probably in months.
Because for the first time he could say he belonged.