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Lana, objectively, had good taste.
In food, clothes, friends, but most importantly, crushes.
When she was younger, she had to like someone to keep herself entertained. That sounds a bit shallow, but it wasn’t like she was doing it for the love of the game! She never really ended up dating anyone though, the Garrison was too rigorous to really offer anything more than secretive crushes. But even still, she kept her standards high!
The people she liked had to be kind, affectionate, empathetic, dependable, calm, and, obviously, attractive.
So why in the world does she have a crush on Keira??
Keira could barely be called kind, she was crude and dry, she was probably the nicest to Shiro and that’s literally her brother. In no way she was affectionate, whenever Lana even attempted to give her a hug she would just freeze up! Which is weird, because Lana gave amazing hugs, thank you very much, literally everyone else on the ship could attest to that except Keira!
She wasn’t empathetic, how could she be? Keira was as dense as a brick wall when it came to reading other people’s emotions, god knows how many times Lana had to train her through how to talk to diplomats.
Dependable… That was one that could be something to actually describe her. Keira was dependable in battle, when Lana would be an inch away from an enemy sword she would be there in a second to take it down instantly. Dependable when it came to making sure that a space cookie, courtesy of Hunk, would be left for Lana? No way, curse Keira’s sweet tooth.
But was she at least calm? Not a chance! Keira was angry. She was angry, and brash, and reckless, and every other word that’s the opposite of calm! She always ran into danger, with no care if she got hurt or not. Lana doesn’t know how she doesn’t have a head full of white hair, poor Shiro though.
There’s no way Lana actually likes Keira, this has to be a side effect from living in a castle ship with only six other people. It’s like a worse, horrid and evil-er version of Stockholm syndrome! Definitely caused by constant close proximity or something. Because it wasn’t like Keira was purposefully keeping her here, that’s Voltron’s fault. Wait, if Lana likes Voltron does that mean she’s getting Stockholm syndrome from Voltron? Is that even possible?
Focus, Lana!
Keira didn’t do shit to hurt or even to make Lana like her! It doesn’t matter that Keira always looks after her on the battlefield, or brings an extra blanket to the lounge when Lana complains that Altean castles are too cold. Or that she somehow knows wherever Lana’s feeling too homesick and asks Hunk to make space garlic knots, or the fact that in group training Keira’s always the one to ask for target practice when she knows that it’s Lana’s favorite type of training to do.
This crush came out of nowhere! It’s like instead of slowly dripping down water onto Lana they just completely water boarded her into the ocean. Like a bug that crawled all around her until biting her in the face! She doesn’t even know when she first got it, just that at some point it arrived and now she has to deal with it.
It wasn’t like Keira wasn’t attractive, she had stupidly healthy black hair, long eyelashes and big ass eyes that just stare into you sometimes. She would be too powerful with blue eyes, Lana would’ve hesitated with her crush at least if Keira stared into her soul with them. That sounds stupid, Lana has blue eyes, but they were a nice pretty blue! Not demonic, scary blue.
God, stop getting off topic Lana!
Keira’s face was cute, but would be cuter though if she smiled more, which sounds kind of weird but isn’t because Lana is a girl and not some creepy dude. She also spends waaay too much time training, like, please get a real hobby. It’s not like it didn’t amount to anything though, she was crazy strong, and was buff as hell! Lana thought that she also got pretty strong from training, but she didn’t really dedicate herself to it like Keira, she has better things to do besides beating up a bot all day!
But, ugh, her clothes, Lana could have at least liked someone with an actual taste in fashion! Cut Lana some slack, it’s not her fault she was in her lazy outfit when they got launched into space! If she had known that she would be here she definitely would've chosen something cuter, not her older brother’s cargo jacket, worn out flare jeans and a gray long sleeve. At least it was comfortable, if anything.
That does NOT give Keira an excuse! A bright red CROPPED jacket with a black t-shirt and black skinny jeans?? What could’ve even led her into owning them? Let alone wearing them out.
This is so stupid. This crush is stupid, Keira is stupid, god, just everything! Everything is stupid, why is Lana even in space in the first place? Her life is stupid.
⋆⁺₊⋆
When Shiro went missing, everything turned to shit, and it turned into more shit when Keira became Black Paladin.
Lana became the Red Paladin, which is fine! It’s not like she’s mourning the loss of her bond with Blue and nervous or anything about making a new one with Red! Allura is the new Blue Paladin though, so that’s fun! Voltron needed more girls in it anyways, (Sorry Hunk).
Becoming the right hand man (girl actually, but whatever) for Voltron was difficult, it was made even worse having to be it for Keira.
But she would be lying if she didn’t somewhat enjoy their late night sessions of just working through paper work and mission files. Maybe this is when Lana realized that she was really down bad for Keira, seeing the normally stoic girl in a more tired, vulnerable state.
She thinks that they became quite the dynamic duo over time! They support each other up when fighting, Lana makes a point in a discussion and Keira backs her up, and when Keira blows up at some prissy royalty that thinks they’re too good for Voltron Lana amends things with them and gets Keira to say sorry. And if they meet up after to talk shit about said royals? That’s something they could only know.
The point is, she was really warming up to her new leader, and their former ‘rivalry’ has developed into this new kind of friendship. And that’s great! Awesome, even! But it’s bad when you’re desperately trying to hide a crush, especially when said crush is constantly with you.
Turns out, after she stopped acting constantly annoyed with Lana’s existence, Keira is very unaware of personal space. It wasn’t anything major, but Lana quickly noticed how in large balls or parties, Keira would hover behind her when she wasn’t talking to some military general or leader. Or when in the mornings Keira would be too tired after training and just walk behind Lana and lean her head against the other’s back, it takes everything in Lana to not completely blush and pass out when she hears Keira let out a long sigh and complain about Lana being too tall.
No, Lana’s heart does NOT beat rapidly whenever Keira takes her hand to maneuver around crowds, or when she flashes Lana a grin when mocking a stuck up noble. Lana is definitely not completely and fully whipped, and she doesn’t even begin to know how to deal with it.
⋆⁺₊⋆
They found Shiro! Which would be a “YAAAAY” if she wasn’t feeling like such a “naaaay” right now, if that even makes sense.
Shiro is.. different. He doesn’t really seem the same, which freaks Lana out because she knows something is wrong but she can’t even confide it to anyone because they’re all so happy he’s back. She especially can’t say anything to Keira, who’s the most happy about getting her brother back, but there’s no way she doesn’t notice how weird Shiro’s acting, right?
Worst part is that Keira’s pulling away, and Lana can feel it in how she’s been treating her.
Instead of joining in the team bonding game nights, or really the team anything, she just sits in her room and only leaves to train for hours.
It’s unhealthy, and Lana tries to tell her that, but all she gets in return is radio silence. Ouch.
Keira’s taking more and more Blade of Marmora missions, so she’s not even staying at the castle that often anymore. She’s not talking to Hunk, Pidge, Allura, and Coran that often anymore. She’s not even talking to Lana anymore. What, so they had months of becoming besties just for her to be dropped by some hot topic wannabe?
All of Lana’s hope of them ever going back to how they used to be got completely broken during one of their worst, and last, late night conversations.
⋆⁺₊⋆
Lana was leaving her bedroom, rubbing her tired eyes, in search of water. It was roughly the middle of the night, and she was planning to go straight back to sleep after chugging a gallon of water, and maybe a plate of food goo.
What she didn’t expect was seeing Keira, fully clothed in BOM armor, carrying a bag with who knows what, heading to the pod hanger.
She didn’t notice Lana until the tired girl opened her mouth,
“Where are you going Keira?”
Keira’s head turned around instantly, her eyes wide with surprise,
“What the hell, Lana! Why are you here?”
“Uh,” She looked down to her blue pajamas, “water? Also I asked first! There’s no way that there’s a Blade mission at this time of night that couldn’t wait until morning.”
Lana watched as Keira’s expression changed from a scowl to guilty, she started scratching her neck awkwardly. She tried to whisper what she was saying but her answer rang throughout the empty halls of the castle.
“I’m leaving Voltron to join the Blade. Like, full time, I guess.”
“WHAT!?” Lana shrieked, causing Keira to wince from her volume.
“You- you can’t leave Voltron! You’re the Black Paladin now!”
“I’m not the Black Paladin, I was just a place holder for Shiro.”
“Then you’re the Red Paladin, whatever, you’re still a part of Voltron!”
“Lana,” Keira sighed, as if she was trying to explain the obvious, “we have too many people in Voltron now. You have a great bond with Red, Allura can’t be pushed away from Blue, and Shiro is in good condition to start piloting Black again. I’m not needed here anymore.”
Lana could feel her hurt turn into anger hearing how non-committal Keira is speaking about what should be a more serious issue!
“Wasn’t it you who got mad at Pidge when she tried leaving Voltron to look for her family? Why are you switching up now just because you wanna run around with the Blades.”
Keira mirrored Lana’s scowl, clearly becoming more agitated,
“Because back then we actually did need her and couldn’t afford to lose anyone. The Blades is a-”
“A secretive operation that could play a key part in taking down the Galra Empire. We all know that. You’re already doing missions for them, you don’t need to be there full time!”
“Yes I do! I could find my mom through their connections and it’s not like I’d be doing anything substantial here.”
“We could find your mom together, it’s not like you can’t talk to them when staying with us anyways,” Lana’s pleading sounded more and more like demands with each sentence spoken.
“Lana, you don’t understand! I need to be there, I need to find out more about my Galra heritage, and I’m not learning shit sitting around in this fuck ass castle,” Keira snapped, her free hand curling into a firm fist.
“Those Blade guys don’t give a rat’s ass if you die! They have that stupid policy of focusing on the mission and leave whomever is injured behind to avoid liabilities! That’s too dangerous!”
Lana got leveled out by a very pointed and sharp stare from Keira,
“You think what we’re doing in Voltron is safe? Just because we care about each other and have that magical lion bond that makes us work together better and besties forever we suddenly are above every other group fighting against Zarkon? You and I both know that we’ve almost seen death more than once, the Blade won’t be any different. I’ve worked alone before.”
“You don’t have to be alone anymore! You have us, you have me.”
Keira’s glare softened, her eyes shining with an unknown emotion as she stared at Lana. She opened her mouth again after a few beats of tense silence,
“Good bye, Lana,” Her voice cracked as she spoke, she then turned away, going in the direction of the pods once again.
What the fuck was that. Keira just leaves and Lana’s left there to stand like a bumbling fool? She’s still in shock of what she just learnt. Keira wants to leave because there isn’t enough space for her? If anything Lana should’ve been the one to leave, she was the seventh wheel, not Keira!
She’s not even thirsty anymore, and doesn't even know if she has the energy to walk any more distance than to her room.
Watching Keira walk away, Lana could feel her heart breaking ten times over as the footsteps became more and more distant.
⋆⁺₊⋆
Pining over someone who you haven't seen in ages is a lot harder than it seems, especially when said person refuses to do the check in calls with anyone besides Shiro and Allura. Is Lana not good enough to be graced by the holy presence of high school drop out Keira Kogane?
Again, Shiro is kind of weird…
He’s getting mad and getting pissed off a lot more often and the ‘responsible older brother’ energy he had before is slipping away with every annoyed sigh and dismissive wave. Lana is this close to going to the Blade of Marmora base herself and getting Keira just to put her brother back in line.
On the bright side, Pidge found her brother! Matt’s pretty chill, fun to talk to sometimes, but a total simp. He made heart eyes at Allura as soon as he saw her, which makes sense because Allura’s definitely one of the most beautiful people Lana’s ever seen, but still! Keep it in your pants, we’re fighting a war here.
The Voltron show was fun, it was really awesome getting to live out her drama kid dreams by acting out plays about battles they’ve fought before. The worst part about the Garrison was its lack of creative classes and clubs because it’s a “military school”. Frick you Iverson. Lana couldn’t stop laughing at Allura’s lone wolf Keira act, it was totally hilarious seeing the Princesses' pissed off expression every time Coran called her that.
Besides Keira’s absence, things have been pretty okay! Sure, being Shiro’s right hand person is kind of hard when he hates it when she tries to help with anything, but Lana’s adjusting. But whenever he bitches about Lana getting in the way or just not being good enough, a little voice in her head whispers Keira wouldn’t have done that, Keira was better. And Lana feels so bad for thinking that because Shiro has definitely gone through a lot! The guy is literally graying and has a metal arm, but it shouldn’t be an excuse to be so mean to her all the time.
Lana misses Keira, like, a lot.
And she starts missing her more when Lotor gets in the picture. He’s okay, but with his arrival Lana’s noticed how disconnected she’s becoming with the team. Allura’s constantly hanging out with Lotor, and Pidge and Hunk are both busy with whatever they do to hang out with Lana like the good ol’ days. It makes her feel lonely.
If Keira was here, they probably would've been hanging out too. Maybe they would’ve trained together, or gone to the pool, or even just hung out in one of their rooms. If Keira was here Lana could’ve done a skin care night with her, or painted her nails, or just get to see her stupid face.
She wonders if Keira misses her as much as Lana misses her.
⋆⁺₊⋆
What they don’t tell you about fighting in a war and having to deal with helping to lead an intergalactic rebellion is that it drains you. Lana learnt this the hard way.
Her long, normally straightened, hair is now curling back into its original shape and incredibly frizzy. Thank god for Allura lending her curly hair products, but Lana can’t get herself to have the energy to properly use it. She still does her skin care routine but she’s not as consistent with it as she used to be, and she’s too drained to cover up her eye bags with the limited amount of makeup she got from the last space mall visit.
Lana’s falling apart, and she knows that everyone can see it. Hunk is talking to her more carefully, as if she was a piece of glass that already has cracks in it. Pidge tries to cheer her up with video games, but that only serves to tire her out more when playing late at night.
Allura’s even trying to help her, bringing up a girls spa night for the two of them to decompress, but Lana has barely any time to spare with the sheer amount of paperwork that needs to be done. Who knew that trying to make an alliance with the Prince of the Galra empire meant a lot of busy work?
Shiro isn’t even helping that much with the work, He just glances at a few papers then shoves the rest to Lana for her to do by herself. She’s noticed though, that Shiro looks over the most important documents for a good few moments before tossing it aside to Lana, weird but okay.
But she had thought that she'd been holding it together pretty good, at least until on a random mission where they fought on a Galra ship. Lana’s hair was tied up, and she thought that it was secure, until a close call with a sentry proved her wrong. She was able to dodge in time, but it wasn’t until the end of the mission she realized that her head felt a lot lighter, and that the others had been sending her pitying looks.
Lana collapsed against her bed, not bothering to remove her armor after the mission, laying there until pulling herself up to go refresh and maybe clean up a bit. She changed into her pajama robes, then slowly walked into the bathroom.
She splashed her face with cold water, feeling herself relax with the feeling of sweat and grime being washed off, then looked in the mirror after wiping her face. Lana felt the color drain from her face at what she saw.
Her previously hip length hair was now up to her chin.
When did this happen? How did she not notice? Is that why her head felt lighter? She thought it was just because she took her helmet off.
Now she was left with a botched pixie cut, and her hair looked even more like a mess.
Lana felt her last piece of resolve break, and before she knew it tears welled up in her eyes.
What did she even do in her past life that made her deserve this? She should've graduated high school and be in college by now. She missed every major milestone for herself, no senior prom, no graduation ceremony, and she broke her twin sister’s promise of sneaking out to Waffle House on the first day of summer. She misses her mom, and her dad, and her siblings, her house, and just Earth in general.
She misses Keira.
Lana couldn’t stop herself from crying over the sink, then sliding down to the cold metal floor as more tears came. She cried until she felt too tired to care anymore, collapsing into her bed that smelled nothing like home and hugging her older brother’s jacket.
She woke up that morning to a splitting headache, and just spent the better part of that morning staring at her messed up hair in the mirror. She took the short walk to Keira’s room in search of a stray knife, finding a small blade tucked under the cold pillow.
Lana huffed out a small laugh, of course Keira slept with a knife under her pillow. The walk back to her room was just as uneventful as the walk from it, thankfully nobody else shared this room wing of the Castle besides Keira and Lana.
Standing in front of her mirror, Lana tried to work diligently as she carefully cleaned up the ends of her hair, putting in small layers to somewhat help with volume.
After a long shower she decided to put her gifted hair products to use, and ended up with a surprisingly decent hair cut. It was the complete opposite of her old long, heat damaged straight hair, but it was okay . Even if it wasn’t a horrible change, Lana still felt like the last piece of Earth she held with her shedded away with the new cut.
Lunch was when she finally emerged from her room, still wearing comfortable pajamas but looking much better. When she entered the lunch room, she saw Allura give her a wide smile, Pidge complimenting her with a playful grin as she sat down,
“I like your hair, new look?”
Lana gave back a small smile as she sat in her seat,
“Something like that.”
⋆⁺₊⋆
When in the middle of shooting practice, Lana was alarmed at the sound of the hanger door opening to let in a new ship. From what she knew, Allura and Lotor were still in the quintessence field, there’s no way they came back that early.
Worried, she ran to the hanger, only to be met with the surprise of a lifetime.
Standing right there, in all her glory, was Keira, and she looked different. She was taller, which will definitely take some getting used to because she used to be shorter than Lana, and she looked older, and grizzled, she guessed. How long was Keira gone for to go through a full transformation? It’s only been around six to eight months, if she remembered properly.
Lana wanted more than anything to go and give Keira a hug, but when she had gone to try to embrace her friend, she was met with only cold, cold, rejection.
“I don’t have time for this Lana!”
Keira hadn’t even looked at Lana when she had decided to just brush her off like she was chopped liver! The nerve, and to think she missed her this much.
Lana noticed the extra three passengers Keira brought with her, a tall Galran woman that has a creepy resemblance to Keira, a cute space dog, and a blond Alte-
ALTEAN!?
Before Lana could fully wrap her head around what she had just seen, Keira spoke again ,
“Lotor is a traitor.”
⋆⁺₊⋆
The next few vargas were probably the most stressful moments of Lana’s life.
Her head is still rushing from the earlier fight, and she could barely process the grief of losing what had been her home for the last two years, not with the scene in front of her.
The real Shiro, well, not the real real Shiro. A cloned version of his body, that was laying limp in the healing pod that was whisked away from the Castle as they left. His hair was fully gray, and Lana never felt so bad making so many jokes about him going full white before he hit thirty. His soul was inside of the Black Lion, and Lana watched with a slight unnerving feeling as Allura used her Princess Power Hands (trade mark pending) to channel it into the body.
Those same hands had brought Lana back to life too, once, so it was weird watching it happen to another person. It felt like watching her own resurrection from the third person, if she was a six foot something grown man with a robot arm.
Grown man? But she had just turned nineteen a few months ago, she was now also a grown adult, technically. It doesn’t mean anything though! Lana is as much as the seventeen year old teenager she was when they first came here, she’s just a bit different now, that’s all.
The other Shiro, the weird one, was a clone being controlled by Haggard. That definitely made sense with how freaky he was acting, it should’ve been more obvious with how he turned a total one-eighty from his old personality.
Lana took the moment of tense silence as Allura furrowed her brows in exertion to finally look around at the planet they landed on. The ground was dark, and the setting sky gave the area a magenta hue. She found herself missing the cold sterile white of the Castle med bay walls and floor.
Allura let out a sigh, collapsing on the ground as her hands fell away from the body, the blue glowing from her hand disappearing. Coran appeared by her side to steady her as they all stared at Shiro with anticipation.
As soon as his first breath was taken, Keira was at his side, helping Shiro sit up as Pidge and Hunk surrounded him quickly in a hug. Watching, Lana waited until he fully opened his eyes, joining the hug as soon as a warm expression spread on his face. She knew for a fact this was their real Shiro.
“Hey guys, had fun while I was gone?” Shiro croaked out, his voice being used for the first time in months.
Keira huffed out a fond sigh, “Not at all, please for the love of god stop doing stupid shit.”
Nodding her head, Lana agreed, “The other fake weird you was a total buzz kill, nothing like our Shiro!”
Everyone was finally together, no clones, no annoying space princes, and no leaving.
⋆⁺₊⋆
Three years.
That’s how long they have to travel to get back to Earth.
Three whole years, until skies that are an actual light blue and not a weird purple, until grass that is green and turns pale yellow when dry not bright orange, and until other humans and family are able to greet them and not some random alien species.
Three years until Lana can see her family.
It would’ve felt so long if before as far as she was aware they weren’t going to risk going to Earth until well into the war, but they’ve got it mostly under control now that both Zarkon and Lotor are dead. The only threat now is that creepy witch.
Now they’re on a super fun space road trip! Sucks that there aren’t any space gas stations to go with it though, getting a bright blue and red 40 filled slushie would heal Lana right now.
The Lions lost a lot of energy from the fight and losing the Castle, so to give both them and the robots a needed break they have the occasional pit stop on a planet. The one they are landing on now is their first stop of many, a large field with a forest with ginormous trees behind it.
As they land, Lana gets the notification of a group line being opened, and calls Romelle over to listen to it.
Pidge adjusts her glasses as she sees everyone enter the feed, moving her head to look at something off screen,
“We can take off our helmets for this planet, my readings say that its atmosphere is safe to breathe, we can also change into casual clothes but staying in armour is technically safer.”
“Are there any hostiles or civilizations?” Keira asked.
Lana noticed her mom in the background, and felt like she was staring right at her, though Krolia might have very well had just been staring at the video feed in general. Still, she felt a shiver as those purple and yellow eyes bore into her soul, she can definitely see where Keira gets it from.
Pidge looked harder at whatever screen she had open before answering Keira with a disappointed sigh,
“Nah, there’s only peaceful beings but no animal here is advanced enough to be considered an intelligent being, it’s better for us but I was hoping to be able to talk to someone new besides you guys, no offense Romelle and Krolia.”
Krolia waved an unoffended hand as Romelle shouted “None taken!”
Lana could not wait to leave the ship, sorry Red, but after being inside of him for so long she was starting to feel like she was stuck in an evil Walmart.
As soon as they touched down onto land, she left the Lion immediately, throwing off (taking off and gently placing to the side) her helmet as her foot met blue grass. She breathed in a deep breath as she looked out into the field, planes of blue with a pale green sky.
Surprisingly, not the most interesting color combo she’s seen so far in space.
Looking over the scenic view, Lana mourned the loss of her Instagram more than anything, all seven hundred of her followers must have been wondering where her amazingly thought out stories and posts went.
Still admiring the view, she didn’t notice the sound of rapid footsteps behind her before being tackled by a big, dark blue fluff ball.
“AAUGH!”
Lana let out a scream before realizing her attacker was none other than the space wolf Keira had brought with her. Kosmo tackled her down onto her back before licking her face in the excitement only a puppy could have.
Her scream dissolved into giggles, not having the heart to push off the smiling dog, the wolf letting out tiny yips as it calmed down from licking and laying on top of her contentedly.
It doesn’t matter that she could barely breathe under him, Lana concluded that Kosmo is officially the most precious thing in the universe. Just look at him! What an adorable thing, she hasn’t felt this happy since Hunk made her knock off red velvet cake for her 19th birthday!
“Kosmo! Get off her!”
Keira was speed walking to where Kosmo and Lana laid, a small scowl twisting her face. Kosmo got off, but sat obediently next to Lana as she sat up, sticking his tongue out like a true dog as he stared back at the Black Paladin.
The scowl on Keira’s face only deepened when the wolf refused to leave Lana’s side, sticking next to her like glue as she stood up, rubbing her legs and walking around her in circles.
“Kosmo. Come here, now!”
The wolf let out a defiant whine as he pressed closer to Lana, which made her let out an amused laugh. She bent down to scratch and pet him, cooing him in a high pitched voice,
“Awwww is the angry lady there being a huge meanie to the little guy? The cute little guy that just wanna play with the nice pretty lady? It’s okay cutie, you can stay with me!”
She looked up to see Keira staring at her, her eyes strangely warm, but lips still slightly downturned.
Lana offered a somewhat awkward smile, with this being the first time they’ve talked one on one since their fight, and stood up fully,
“Don’t worry, I’m okay with him sticking with me today, I won’t lose him, cross my heart!”
Keira looked between her and Kosmo, both giving their best puppy eyes, before dragging her hand down her face with a deep breath,
“Okay, tell me if he bothers you,”
She knelt down to Kosmo and pointed a finger,
“And you. Behave for the nice pretty lady, if anything happens teleport both of you back to camp.”
Kosmo nodded seriously, as if he could understand a single word coming from his owner’s mouth, then turning his head back up to Lana asking for more scratches.
The word pretty got completely thrown over Lana’s head, she barely noticed it as her attention was brought back to Kosmo, who was eagerly barking to play around their camp.
Lana pointedly ignored how she felt Keira’s eyes watching her and Kosmo as they played around and helped in setting up the camp. And she especially ignored how at night as the team huddled around the fire Keira stared at her so hard Lana thought she was trying to burn holes into her skull.
They haven’t even had a full conversation yet, let alone properly talked to each other about anything except plans really. Lana was still hurt from Keira’s absence, how could she not be?
Keira left abruptly in the middle of the night and Lana wouldn’t have even known if she didn’t happen to run into her, she never bothered to call or to reply to Lana’s messages while she was gone, and worst of all she was a total asshole when she came back!
Lana does not have a crush on Keira, not anymore at least.
She’s been hurt too many times, too many to let whatever half assed apology, which Keira hasn’t even offered yet, slide.
⋆⁺₊⋆
Lana’s completely ruined.
She’s laying in the inner Red Lion bed, decked out in her blue PJs and eye mask trying to go to sleep, but nothing she tries is working! Counting sheep, noise canceling headphones, calming music, none of them work!
It’s not even because of some fucked up trauma induced dream this time, this is an entirely different kind of nightmare.
And it’s all Keira’s fault.
For the past few weeks, they’ve been talking more. It’s nowhere near how comfortable they were before, but it could be considered a start. The light teasing and casual conversation has at least served to somewhat ease Lana’s worry that Keira might’ve just straight up not liking her anymore.
The problem is that earlier today, Keira, like the jerk she is, SMILED at her! Not even a small, subtle one, it was a full on grin that showed off all her teeth and made her eyes sparkle and lit up her face like the Fourth of July.
All Lana did was take down four Galra sentries with her broad sword to help save Keira’s butt, only to be met with the widest smile she’s pretty sure she has ever seen from that emo when she turned to ask if she was okay.
Her face was so.. happy? In awe, maybe? Like Lana had just told her that My Chemical Romance and Paramore were having an exclusive cross over tour in space. Maybe she was just in shock of her new weapon, Lana had only gotten it a few months before Keira had come back, and this was her first time using it in battle since.
It took everything in her to not just grab that stupid face and kiss it right there, in all its blood and sweat soaked glory. But she didn’t.
As soon as they came back to the temporary camp at another planet from the cruiser, Keira had pulled her aside to ask if they could spar together sometime with an excited glint in her eyes and still having that stupid smile on her face. Obviously, Lana said yes.
How could she not! You would too if you saw how eager Keira was asking and saw how her grin only grew when she agreed to spar some time. It’s funny, Lana mused, Keira had reminded her a lot of Kosmo with how she was glued to Lana for the rest of the night, trying to talk and help her with any mission logs and work.
And now because of that, Lana was now rolling around in her uncomfortable bed that was definitely made for the occasional trip and not a three year journey, and on the verge of screaming.
But if she did, the mice would definitely get pissed at her, especially since she was the one begging to have them staying in her Lion for this leg of the trip.
Just, AUGH, how could Keira still be this cute!
Keira couldn’t possibly still be cute, she’s older, taller, and buffer. If anything Lana should be calling her hot, not cute.
What even is that logic?? Lana was still mad, she shouldn’t be thinking that Keira is anything!
Is she dragging it, maybe, but god forbid a girl is petty for once. She should be meaner, but those eyes. She is so weak for a pretty girl, and even weaker for a pretty girl that could break her in half but still has an awkward demeanor when talking to people.
Lana notices her legs kicking in the air as she thinks about Keira, slamming them down on the bed immediately, way harder than necessary. She’s almost twenty, for god’s sake! She shouldn’t be kicking her legs in the air like a teenage girl in some shitty romcom.
⋆⁺₊⋆
Keira, you ran away.
Maybe you should’ve just stayed away.
Ha haha ha
It’s crazy what the mind makes you say when you’re delirious and floating in empty space for hours with a falling apart team.
They’re landing on a new planet, after the whole strange event that just occurred to them. Their bond has grown stronger, making the Lions have more energy and able to travel for longer distances than before. It’s nowhere near how strong it used to be before though, but that’s not the biggest issue right now.
Even if the Lions could fly for longer, after that whole… situation, they all deserve a break from flying inside the small confines of their ships. The good part is that nearby was a rest stop planet, whatever that was.
Coran explained that it was a very small planet made for short stops, complete with an all day food service and individual rooms for each person.
Individual rooms? Like Lana gets her own room? Like she gets to sleep in her own little private area without having to deal with Romelle’s snoring and getting woken up in the middle of her nap with a training drill?
Lana was already shaking with anticipation when Coran had first mentioned it, and was about to explode when Shiro agreed and said they’d pay for the full package, which meant hot tubs and room service. She hasn’t felt this excited to go to a hotel since she was six and on family vacation, and even then she had to share her room with her siblings.
The others shared her excitement, but when Lana moved her gaze across all of her friend’s video feeds she noticed that Keira wasn’t as happy as they were. Her eyebrows were furrowed and her mouth was put into a pout, as if she was thinking about something really hard. Lana hopes not too hard, she would hate to have her die from brain damage.
Her mind drifts back to before, when they were stuck floating in space. Everyone gets a bit space crazy, and she’s sure that they were all already partway there with all of the endless flying, being stranded with no Lions and with just the five of them was just the push to madness they definitely didn’t need.
They all said hurtful stuff, and Lana’s heart hurts for Hunk who had been trying to keep them together so desperately. The words that came out of her mouth after Keira had blamed Allura for their situation wasn’t intentional, it just came out harsher than expected, okay?
In her defense, she was pissed, months of resentment and anger boiled up when Keira just started blowing up out of nowhere. They weren’t only friends because of the damn Lions, they also were friends because they trusted and cared for each other, something Lana isn’t sure she could say the same for Keira after that.
It’s okay, they all made up and had a group hug and everything. They’re fine.
Lana left her hotel room after a very long shower, which was definitely needed. One more day of showering in the recycled water in Red would’ve sent her into actual psychosis.
Her hair was still slightly damp, drops of water falling from a few strands, and she was wearing the Sonic tee (found in an Earth merch stall) and a pair of blue pajama pants. The shirt was off the shoulder, thanks to Lana’s awesome cloth customizing skills that was sorely needed in space. She knows she’s the Red Paladin now, but blue is still definitely her color, no one is going to change that.
As closed her door, she turned to be met by a pair of deep violet eyes.
Surprised, Lana flinched back, “Oh! Hey, Kei-”
“Should I have stayed away.”
Lana blinked owlishly, tilting her head slightly.
Seeing that she wasn’t responding, Keira repeated herself,
“Do you think I should have stayed away, Lana?”
Her face was serious, but there was a tinge of hurt spread across it.
“What! No! Of course not, I was just stressed, I didn’t mean it at all,” Lana protested.
“But if you said it, obviously you were thinking it!”
Keira looked at Lana’s face, trying to soften her tone in a more approachable way,
“Look, I know the reason that the Lions aren’t at their top energy capacity and still unable to form Voltron is because the bond is still fragile, and I think the reason for that is from us. I know we haven’t been..” She trailed off, looking to the side, “the closest these past few months, but if there is something that’s making you feel closed up then tell me, please.”
Lana scoffed, “There’s nothing wrong, I’m just tired. Now if you excuse me, there is a muffin with my name on it!”
She tried to speed walk past Keira, but felt her wrist get caught in a strong grip, and pulled back to stand in front of her leader.
“You’re lying to me. There’s something up with you and if you can’t deal with your shit then we can’t even begin to think about forming Voltron,” Keira’s voice shifted to something more demanding, like the voice she’d use when negotiating alliances.
Lana pulled her arm back, leveling the older one out with a glare,
“I don’t have any shit, I just have a ton of work and a sore excuse of a leader, so forgive me for being a bit tired.”
Keira scowled, clenching her fists,
“Seriously! What the hell is your problem!”
“My problem is that you think that you can leave for, what, over eight months? And think that I’ll grovel at your feet and we can just go back to normal as if nothing changed!”
“Lana you know I left for good reason, we wouldn’t have Romelle, or know about Lotor if I didn’t go. I don’t get why we can’t go back to how we used to!”
“Because you left me! You went to have fun with your little blade friends and left me to deal with what you left.”
Lana glowered at the girl before her, voice on the verge of shouting as she pushed a finger onto Keira,
“I didn’t have any help with all of the work, I didn’t have my normal back up in battle, I had to deal with Shir- the clone’s BS about me being the weak link because I wasn’t strong enough, and I had to deal with the hole you left on your little escapade.”
“You think I was having fun?” Keira walked closer to Lana, grabbing the arm that was poking her and pulling it down to the side.
“The blades were like hell, and being on that stupid space whale was like being stuck in purgatory. You were right, the Blade of Marmora doesn’t give a shit if you live or die, but I did it for our cause. But you know what got me through every mission and every day in the two years on that whale?”
They stood in a tense silence for a little less than a moment, before Keira looked straight at Lana, her gaze serious.
“You, thinking of you kept me going. Not Shiro, or Pidge, Hunk, Allura, or anyone else. The only thing making me wake up every morning was the thought of your face, your jokes, and your smile. I dreamt everyday of going back home to you, and you would smile at me and make some stupid joke about me looking like shit and you’d drag me to do a skin care day and we’d watch some Altean movie that we can’t even understand but it would be okay because we were together.”
Moving their arms, Keira held Lana’s hands together in between her own, and looked at her with a pleading look.
“Every night I dreamed of running my fingers through your hair, and holding you in my arms in bed. I recounted every story about your family and Earth that you’ve told me, and every conversation we had to keep me sane. I wish I had never left, I wish that things were different and that we could’ve stayed together every day and that we would’ve been coming back to Earth under better circumstances. I just want to make you happy.”
Lana’s brain short circuited. She looked between her hands held in the gentle grip and then to Keira's big eyes. Her face flushed completely red as she took in the words that had just been proclaimed to her.
“Was that, you- you just said- did you,” her mouth opened, closed, then opened again, not sure what to say.
“Keira, did you just say that you… like me?”
Huffing out a laugh, Keira pressed her lips against Lana’s hands, a small smile spread on them,
“Lana, I literally don’t know how I can spell it out more for you, I am in love. With you, I mean.”
Lana’s face grew impossibly redder, stammering at the feeling of slightly dry lips against her fingers,
“This, this isn’t real, either I’m dreaming or I need to lay off of the alien painkillers, my mind is so cruel to me.”
She tried pulling her hands away, but with no real effort that was shown clearly with Keira tugging her back again gently.
“Hopefully this will show it’s real,” was all Keira muttered as she moved one hand to Lana’s cheek.
Before she knew it, Lana was kissing Keira, and it was leagues better than what she had ever imagined it being. Keira’s lips were just barely chapped, and her lips tasted faintly of some sort of alien fruit and goo rations, but it was just so Keira and she couldn’t get enough.
Lana felt Keira’s other arm wrap around her, pulling them closer together. Her now free hands roamed around the other’s arms before settling in Keira’s hair. Her hair was stupidly healthy, and all Lana felt was soft waves as she pushed Keira in closer.
As they separated, Lana made sure to take a moment to appreciate Keira’s appearance, her hair was disheveled from hands that were still buried in it, and her eyes were blown open, pupils big. The smirk on her face grew as she took in Lana’s face too, probably taking her in the same way Lana was to her.
Breaking the silence, Keira opened her mouth, a grin still wide on her lips.
“Is it real now?”
Lana looked down, her face burning, she was about to reply before her head snapped back up in realization, eyes wide with disbelief. She pushed Keira away, her hands moving as she gripped her own head in shock.
“Did you-! We just- our faces, our mouths, that was my first kiss! And it was in the middle of an alien hotel hallway! Why would you, I’m supposed to be mad right now!”
Watching with thinly veiled amusement, Keira slowly took Lana’s flailing hands in her own as she listened to the blue eyed girl’s rambling, her mouth moving a mile a minute.
“Mami is going to be so mad with me, and we’re in public, what if someone saw! We’re going to be detained by space police for PDA! I’m too young to go to jail, and Pidge would never let me hear the end of it if she found out why they had to bail us out! No, I’m making sure that you don’t leave, I’m getting bailed and making you wait in there for at least three, no, four, days and then you’ll get bailed.”
Keira smiled fondly and she ran her thumb over Lana’s knuckles, laughing softly as she replied,
“I’m okay with that, but you do realize that we’re the space police, right?”
Lana’s head turned to the side, her mouth shifting into a pout,
“Okay, fine, whatever.”
Blue eyes met violet as Lana looked at Keira with a firm expression,
“I can’t, I won’t be able to be perfectly close to you right now, I love you, so much that it hurts, but I need us to work through our stuff before anything. I can’t just move on just because you reciprocate my feelings.”
Keira gripped their hands together tighter, her face still hopeful,
“I am going to do whatever it takes to gain back your trust. I’ll kill Zarkon all over again just to get you back.”
“Then stay, please, just don’t leave again without a word. I am so tired of this shit, if you leave again I won’t be able to promise that I’ll be here to welcome you back.”
Keira knocked their foreheads together, their noses almost touching,
“I am never going to leave you, not anymore. And you will be next to me as we do whatever duties the galaxy calls for in Voltron, and in us. Lana and Keira, neck and neck, right?”
Frown shifting into a small smile, Lana looked back at Keira, mirroring her genuine expression.
“Right.”
Suddenly, two loud roars came from the direction of the ship parking, startling them and making them jump away from each other.
The two girls ran outside, only to be met with the Black and Red Lions sitting outside the hotel, meeting their paladin’s gazes with glowing yellow eyes.
They were all fully charged with quintessence.
The thought rang throughout the two co-leaders' minds as they looked up, speechless at what they were seeing.
After a few beats of silence, Lana turned to Keira, who was still looking up at Black,
“Huh, turns out I did need to work through my shit.”
Tearing her eyes away, Keira faced Lana, grinning as she chuckled, “Told you.”
Still on the high of the good news, tentatively, Lana stepped forward, once, then twice, towards Keira, who had noticed her steps and started moving towards her to meet in the middle.
Their steps quickened before they collided, Keira wrapping her arms tightly around Lana as she did the same, holding on to each other as if their lives depended on it. Keira buried her face into the crook of Lana's neck, letting out a deep sigh as she hugged her tighter.
“Do you hate me?”
Lana laughed at the question, humming in thought,
“How could you kiss and hug me and only now asking if I hate you? Of course not, stupid, but we just made up, like, today, so how about we just take things slow?”
“Slow takes too long though,” Keira mumbled against Lana, not planning to let go anytime soon.
Huffing in amusement at the older one’s actions, Lana indulged her for a few moments before pushing her off, resting her own hands on the other’s shoulders as she leaned away from Keira’s pull.
“What’s that thing that Shiro always says? Patience yields focus, or some old geezer thing like that.”
“Amazing impression, it’s almost like he’s right here.”
Keira frowned at the distance between them, despite the fact that she still had her arms around the Red Paladin. She resisted the urge to pull Lana back, settling on just looking at her face with content.
They stood in a daze, until an annoyed roar from the Red Lion interrupted their moment. Shaking away the shock from the loud sound, Lana gently patted Keira’s shoulder, sighing,
“Okay team leader, now there’s seriously some food and mission logs waiting for me to get to, soo,” Lana looked up to Keira, eyes shining with hope, “I've got to go, but I can count on a casual hang out sometime soon..?”
“Of course,” Keira smirked, but the teasing edge was softened by the whipped look in her eyes.
As she stepped away, about to leave, Lana turned back to Keira as if a thought came to her. Ever so carefully, she leaned in to leave a quick kiss onto Keira’s cheek, grinning as she reveled in the way the fierce Black Paladin devolved into a blushing mess.
“Consider this our warranty, also, can I trust that you’ll tell everyone about the Lions?”
She watched Keira nod dumbly before spinning around on her heel and walking back to the hotel. There was an added skip to her step that may have not been there before, and her smile was blinding to the passing aliens she walked by.
⋆⁺₊⋆
Lana has.. decent taste, but it’s certainly better than having a bad one.
Keira is kind, even though she tried to hide it under her ‘bad girl’ act. She was empathetic to little kids who needed help and entertained them to distract them from any damage around or on them. She goes with Pidge to look for scraps of metal in random planets' landfills when no one else wants to come help. She taste tests Hunk’s most dangerous recipes even if it means having a stomach ache just to help him to perfect the recipes. She trains with Allura to take the Princess’s mind off of other matters with hours of sparring.
Keira’s affectionate, more affectionate than what she lets other people know. She baby talks and coos to Kosmo like he’s her own kid, balancing out affection with strict dog training. She hugs like she’s scared to let go kisses like she never wants to.
She was nothing but dependable. She covered Lana’s ass when in battle, and was someone Lana knew that she wouldn’t have to worry about getting hurt when Keira was nearby. Even when not knowing what to say, she always provided a comforting hand on the shoulder. Keira was more empathetic than she let on, always checking in with the team after missions to ensure that everyone is okay, not only as their leader but as their friend.
Over the years, Keira had mellowed out. She wasn’t as brash or reckless as she used to be, though she still has her moments. Keira wasn’t angry, she knew when she could be mad and when she had to keep it under wraps.
Keira was beautiful, and Lana was blind for not seeing that sooner.