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Poking a hole in his dark blazer with the little pin, a smile crept up his face. He wasn't quite ready to tell the police force about his secret but he still wanted to stand up for his community. Afterall, if he wasn't going to stand up for it who would? The pin itself was a small star badge with the different points being the colours of the trans flag. It seemed to be hand made, likely with shrink plastic and paint. Not perfect, but it was still nice. It made Alec feel nice.
fetching a tea from the communal kitchen, the stares of one of his coworkers didn’t go unnoticed.
Grabbing the tea and heading back to the slice of safety known as his office he ignored the whispers of the two officers guarding the coffee machine. They’d been there a month but since day one had been nothing but thorns in his side constantly gossiping and goggling like deranged animals. He wasn’t actually sure when the last time he saw them do any work was, and they’d decided to join the gym he tried to frequent so there was quite literally
'Hey what's with the pin?' one of them had piped up. 'Gift from a friend' pulling on his grouchy demeaned in an attempt to prevent further questioning. It seemed to work well enough and he slipped back into the quiet of his office.
He didn't leave again until 2pm when he and Miller were called to a meeting about improving public perception of police with the whole department. Of course no one could stop bringing up the constant media slander Alec received, 'Maybe it would improve public perception if our DI wasn't constantly caught up in scandals' everyone laughed but to Alec it just kinda stung.
The ideas slung around by the department were pitiful. Posters and local advertising that sort of thing. One idea did catch his attention though, a talk from the police in the school nearby. Clearing his throat the Scottish brogue rang clear.
'Ai, I actually thought it might be nice to have a talk at the school on LGBTQ+, we could show as a police force that we care about important issues and educate kids at the same time?' There was a pause from the room but the chief super seemed somewhat pleased. 'Sounds like a great idea Alec, but uhm- who would give this talk. You can't exactly do it, you’re a straight white man.’ Chuckling she continued ‘We need someone a little more diverse.' Alec blinked. He was a trans bisexual man with ADHD and autism. Still, agreeing to the talk was a step in the right direction, besides no one in the office actually knew any of that.
not like they tried to get to know him in the first place.
'Amy you can give the talk'. She was openly a lesbian and the office just used her as a prop for events like the talk. Whenever she was around people were obnoxiously supportive of it, and the second she left they went back to their homophobic bullshit. Alec thought that Amy probably knew this, she was always tired when people brought up Cate her girlfriend for the 5th time trying to make their point, 'Oh my cousins bi' 'Oh once on a call I had to interview a gay couple, they were really nice' she seemed fed up. So Alec made a point to talk to her about other things, whenever they ended up in conversation. She was the only other person in the office he actually talked to besides Miller.
The days end rolled around and out went his colleagues back to their homes along with Alex himself. Daisy was moving down to his in 2 ish month so slowly the house found all its minute problems being attended to. Fixing a creaking door here, and new paint there. Daisy was always going on about the benefits of a hobby and this one had some practical benefits making it perfect for the workaholic.
On his way out of the office he passed the two new recruits giggling about something like always and today it was his pin. It wasn't metal, or professionally made in any way, instead it was constructed from shrink plastic and acrylic paint. That didn’t matter to much, it had a sweet feeling to it, that someone had taken the time to make it for him. Everyone else it was just 'crafty' and weird.
'So what's the deal with the trans flag then? trying to make yourself look like more of an ally then' The giggling just kept coming. Really they should've been hyenas the way it made up 90% of their sentences. 'Seriously, we all know you’re some homophobic asshole who fucks up everyone around him. I mean really, one pin isn't going to change that. It's not even a nice one' He just kept walking. Hypocrites.
'Hi uhm do you happen to have a DI called Lilly Mayfield?' The receptionist at Broadchurch police had picked up the phone one morning half expecting it to be a sales call. 'No sorry there is no one by that name here' There was a scrambling noise on the other end of the phone. 'Wait, uhm- do you have a DI last name Hardy? uhm- I think she got married a while back? I'm her sister and my parents just said if I wanted to contact her I should call this number?' The receptionist scoffed 'We've got a DI Hardy sweetheart but he certainly isn't your sister. Talk to your parents check the numbers right okay' 'Wait okay they don't know i'm calling you. Look they cut ties with my sister before I was born and so I don't actually know what her number is okay, they mentioned she lived in Broadchurch and worked for the local police as a DI, could you, I don't know look her up or something. Or could you put me through to this other DI Hardy? maybe he knows her, or-' the receptionist sighed. Seemed a little scattered but a good kid on the other end of the phone. Maybe DI Hardy had some secret sister or something, 'Look sweetheart, if it will put you at ease I'll patch you through to DI Hardy but i'm telling you now that man's not worth your time, he's some Scottish bastard, oh excuse my language but he that doesn't give two shits about anyone.' There was a silence 'Scottish? yea if you could patch me through that would be great, my sister was- well is Scottish, my family's been in Scotland for something stupid like 7 generations' 'Alright patching you through love, if he gives you any trouble you tell me and I'll report him to HR for you, might finally get him fired.
'Hey, uhm- is this Lilly Mayfield' Alec was in his office with Miller when the receptionist patched someone through to his phone. He'd put it on speaker expecting it to be some kind of report about littering or some bullshit. Instead a small voice crackled through. His face drained of all colour, 'Who's Lilly, Hardy?' Miller looked suspicious. She'd grown to like his company over the year or so they had worked together but she still found his bullshit a bit much. 'Is anyone there' An eyebrow raised. 'Miller could you leave my office for a moment ai, thanks' She shuffled out looking skeptical, who was Lilly? 'Who is this? where'd you get the name Lilly from?' some kind of paper shuffling was heard from the other end of the phone 'Uhm- well, TV shows really don't do it justice how hard this is to say- but I think she maybe, my sister? my parents kinda hid that I had like 6 older siblings from me, and apparently one of them works in your office? I could be wrong though- uhm the only thing they said was that she worked in Broadchurch with the police?' The jumbled Scottish dialect poured out of the phone. He hadn't been called that name in a very long time. It wasn't her fault though, parents never wanted a trans kid. 'Yea, hi, i'm L- I go by Alec Hardy now but that used to be my name ai, tell you what- I uhm- I'll give you my phone number lass and if you call me later we can figure this out okay, but uhm- sorry I don't really know what to say here.' 'I don't really know either, sorry for getting your name wrong Alec' 'It's fine lass, parents always refused to call me Alec, look I know this isn't great but I cannae talk right now I've got a witness to interview- uhm, It was nice to meet you though lass- well speak to you anyways.' He repeated his phone number out and after a brief conversation the phone line went dead. He just breathed. A sister? his parents must of had her after he left, she still sounded underage. This was a lot to take in. 'Hardy, we need you out here now' Miller voice was ringing through the office and he was snapped out of his thoughts, when had she come back inside? 'Right yea, lets go then'
As it was a Friday the police crew went to the pub together for a weekly hangout. Hardy wasn't there of course, no one had invited him but frankly no one wanted him there in the first place so all was fine. They doubted he wanted to spend time with them anyways, too stuck up to grace them with his presence. Most of the evening was spent gossiping about him though, and this Lilly character. Someone had made a joke that Alec was secretly a trans woman called Lilly Mayfield and the rest of the evening they'd referred to him as Lilly for a joke. For the first time in a long time, the jokes about Alec hadn't sat right with Miller. Sure he was an asshole but Miller drew the line there personally. Broadchurch was a bit behind the times on things like LGBTQ+ she knew that, but seeing her 'friends' joking about it just stung a little. Alec was a brooding mess that didn't respect anyone in the office sure, but she still felt bad for him. She would go as far to consider him a sort of friend. He'd looked after Fred when her babysitter cancelled last minute, and he brought her coffee sometimes. He wasn't actually all that bad. He was there throughout Joe's trial and was there for her when he was forced out of town. He wasn't a complete asshole.
Taking a sip of her pint she looked away from the group of cackling officers and her eyes met those of a young woman. She sat in the corner of the pub drinking what looked like a coke and writing something on her laptop. Those eyes stared up at her and seemed to offer no warmth. Instead a piercing judgement that made Ellie feel hollow. Practically the whole pub could here their conversation but only one seemed to actually be paying attention to it.
Ellie had never felt more judged in her entire life.
The following Monday the members of the department who hadn't covered the weekend shift filtered in, seemingly weighed down by the gloom of realising you had to get up at a reasonable hour in the morning in order to attend your job. They seemed to brighten however when someone had mentioned Friday, and the mill of jokes fired up again churning out repulsive laughs as DI Hardy worked inside his office whilst they threw their sharpened stones. It felt to Ellie like someone was tapping the glass at a zoo exhibit, they all just kept tearing him down insult after insult. It made her feel sick.
'Hello, i'm here to see DI Hardy?' A young woman around the age of 16 appeared before Broadchurch police's very own Margret the receptionist. She gave the girl a sympathetic smile. 'If you need to talk about something private with the police I can go get DS Ellie Miller for you? she's a very gentle woman, kids of her own a year or so younger than you' The teenager blinked, her eyebrows scrunched 'No I'm here to see Alec, uhm- we spoke on the phone a few weeks back? I was calling about my sister-' The receptionists sugar coated voice rang through her ears 'Well, if you're here on a search for your sister poppet then i'm sure DS Miller would be happy to help you, she's just upstairs, first door on the right, I can take you up if you want.' Her shoulders sagged slightly, the receptionist kept giving her big gentle eyes and a soft calm voice, she wasn't here to report a crime but if she was frankly she'd of walked the other way from the overbearing woman. 'No, it's fine, I can find my way up there just fine' She knew she wasn't going to get anywhere with the receptionist and so decided to just ask this DS Miller where she could find Alec. Her boots thumped softly as she climbed up the stairs and the door swung with a creak. Immediately every police officer in the rooms head swung up to meet her eyes, so much for 'a welcoming safe space' as it said on a decrepit poster on the wall
Taking a deep breath her voice rang out 'Does anyone here happen to know where I might find DI Alec Hardy?' in her head she could hear crickets. Wow this place was weird about him. 'Are you here to report a crime? I can help you with that dear if you just follow me' Why was this so much harder than it needed to be. 'No I'm here to see DI Alec Hardy? uhm- could you just tell me where to find him?' before they could start with the sugar coated spiel she started up again. 'I'm not here to report a crime, he's my brother and he is supposed to be meeting me for lunch, so if anyone could just tell me where he is please.' once again, crickets. Seriously what was with this lot?
'DI's got a sister? didn't know he had siblings, bastards so secretive all the time' This made her chuckle slightly. She certainly didn't know much about her family but what she did know was that she had 7 siblings dotted around the earth causing chaos. This lot were surprised by one? wait till they meet the rest. 'What's happened to make you lot all stare at the door then- Sammy? that you? wow you look just like Campbell.' Prior to this meeting neither had any knowledge of what the other looked like. The only of her brothers she'd met prior was Campbell, he was only 3 years older than her and sure he left a few years back but she still knew what he looked like. Apparently he was the 'spitting image' of her brothers at 15 and she in turn the spit of him. Her hair was styled similarly to how Campbell did it, long curtain bangs and sides but she had an undercut. An image of him flashed passed her eyes as she wondered if he had changed his hair style.
Now being a socially awkward teenager she didn't really know what to say next, the two had planned to sit on a picnic bench and Sammy being interested in cooking said she'd bring the food and so all that came out was 'I brought tacos' her backpack swinging off her shoulder to reveal a plastic box with tinfoil covered food.
Alec returned from lunch with a smile on his face but no sister. She'd gone back to his house to drop off her stuff in the spare room soon to be Daisy's who was moving in soon, about 2 weeks from now. Closing the door he landed back in his office chair picking up where he left off on a report that needed doing. His mind kept wandering to his sister though as he typed up the arrest report. Every one of his siblings had a certain smile, a wide goofy one that makes their eyes shine, and she had it too. Constantly smiling as her hair was blown back in the wind, it looked just like Campbells did. He hadn't changed it since he was 15, and the lad was 19 now, to be fair though Alec hadn't changed his hair in the years he'd lived in Broadchurch, after Sandbrook he just let it grow out, no longer styling it to one side.
A conflicting feeling was gnawing at the detective. She'd had to put up with their parents for 15 years just like the rest of them and under no good conscious could he send her back. She said she was fine, they weren't too mad, but there were scars, neat incisions up the back of her neck, middle of the forearm. He bet they were more, across the stomach, between the ribs, along the legs and the top of the head and the back and the waist and everywhere. Whenever Alec saw them he felt like some kind of science project, and he could see it behind her eyes too.
during the day Sammy would explore Broadchurch a bit more, meeting up with her brother for lunch and seeing the sights to see. She quite liked it, it was an idyllic town with a nice ocean view, wasn't too busy but wasn't a ghost town either. The only problem was the people. All of them seemed intent on offering condolences once the news of Alec's mysterious sister had spread. She also received a lot of offers for a chat by a local journalist by the name of Olly. Seriously did this town have nothing better to do than bug Alec. There was a confliction of peoples opinions, it was either all 'I'm so sorry', 'Oh dear you know family's chosen not blood', 'you can come stay with me if he causes you any problems' or it was the complete opposite, pestering if she was a secret love child of his, or some kind of teenage girlfriend, 'Bet she's just like him', 'Being a bastard must run in the family, look at that scowl', 'She got the same genes as her brother', 'Oh hon don't go up to her, that's the DI's sister, that man you need to avoid him'
It hurt more than she was willing to let on.
She was hounded by people looking for some kind of gossip on Alec with the paper's constant hammering drying up now they'd run out of controversies with Sandbrook closed. Sure she could file harassment charges but being honest that would never stick, so everyday at every hour of her impromptu holiday there was at least one person following her. All her faulty little heart wanted was for a little time to breath and figure out her next steps. Running away at 15 seemed to be a family tradition at this point, Alec and his brothers left at 15, followed by Campbell when he was 15, and now it was her turn, turning 15 a few months back. So this little visit to Broadchurch was really just a chance to figure out where to go without her parents breathing down her neck. Only now the entire town seemed to be doing just that.
There was this one woman, DS Ellie Miller. She didn't hound her for gossip and she seemed to respect Alec by the way she spoke. But when she was around the rest of the police force that all seemed to but disappear, she let them talk shit about him and all her confidence seemed to just vanish, she'd laugh uncomfortably at the jokes and stand there as they tore apart her brother. She'd seen the woman on her first night in Broadchurch, staying in a nearby hotel she'd gone to the pub for dinner and there Ellie was, amongst the crowds whispering the name 'Hardy' like it was a slur.
'Sammy was it? do you know where Alec's gotten of too? I know you two are about to go for lunch but I need to show him a forensics report quickly.'
'It's Samantha, and you'll have to wait'
On Friday Alec had to stay late to wrap up paper work on a case, so Sammy had gone to the local weather spoons for cheesy chips and a coke. Set up in a little booth near the front door, she was minding her own business working out logistics of renting a cheap flat in London using inheritance money from a recently deceased uncle, until most of the police force she'd come to know and tolerate (that was a complete lie she couldn't stand any of them except Amy) decided to enter. Yay. One of them eventually spotted her brooding in the corner and had the bright idea to come say hello. This was met with a goodbye and Sammy quickly moved to another corner of the establishment, the furthest one away that wasn't occupied. However, the little mob of officers slowly trickled closer and eventually they came over. She really wanted to stamp on their feet with her heeled boots but didn't feel like spending 15 years in jail for assaulting a police officer and so she heard them out. 'Hey, so like your Hardy's sister right? is he like a trans woman or something' A woman who looked like a cross of a mole and a stinkbug piped up. Hearing them out promptly fell out a nearby window and Sammy burst into laughter. The situation felt like something out of a low budget cartoon.
'Okay then, it was just a question. Are you even his sister or something though because like he didn't recognise you on Monday, like who doesn't know what their sister looks like? oh my god are you some daughter from a one night stand! swear I'll keep it just between us yea'. Yea and the 10 officers eavesdropping across the table from us. Seriously they weren't even being subtle. 'I'm his sister, not some secret love child. He left home before I was born hence him not recognising me.' they didn't need to know that 3 weeks prior he didn't even know of her existence. 'So has he not visited you at home then? Cause like he never talks about his home life' 'I think he just doesn't talk to you in general'
'Why'd you think that' the woman was clearly offended
'Do I really have to explain why?'
This was becoming a regular occurrence. Sammy had extended her stay in Broadchurch for another week, and everyday she'd go get Alec for lunch, and every time she was cornered by nosy office goers looking for a scoop on Alec. The local paper at this point wasn't even subtle, they were constantly looking for tip offs to do with Alec and all the police force wanted to be the one with the latest dirt on him. It was just sadistic. Every day it was 'Oh your Hardy's sister, do you know what happened with him and his wife' 'Does he have a criminal record?' 'Was he arrested once?' 'Are you secretly his daughter? did he have an affair'
but the one that seemed to be popping up more and more was 'Is Hardy a trans woman?' to which Sammy didn't know whether to laugh or cry. I mean where did THAT come from. The police department in particular were nagging her on it, constant 'Oh i'm an ally' 'Oh I know this trans woman' it was just creepy, and unsettling how infatuated the town was with her brother, who most certainly is not a trans woman. He's literally the opposite. A room full of trained police officers and this is the conclusion they reach? Sammy was seeing why they got on Alec's nerves so much.
On the Wednesday of her extra week of staying at Alec's DS Miller actually stopped her on course to get Alec out of his paperwork, but she wasn't pushing her for an answer, or some kind of gossip. 'Look, some rumours have been going around- Could I chat to you for a moment, not trying to pester a story out of you but I just need to ask you something, it's important swear.' Her eyes were soft, but not in a forced way, like she genuinely cared. Following her to a private corner, Miller pulled something out of her purse. 'The DI has a bathroom attached to his office, I used it the other day and. . .I found this needle' pulling out the injector Sammy immediately recognised it as a testosterone shot. Damm Alec and his inability to keep organised, in the 3 or so weeks she'd been staying there were she'd come to realise that without any sort of roommate he was constantly leaving mugs of tea around, plates and files, that extended to his testosterone shots and gels.
'Look, I know the office have been pressuring you about it, but is Hardy trans? he's my friend, I know I haven't been much of a friend recently, i'm pretty shit at it apparently, but- I want to make sure he's okay.'
It wasn't Sammy's secret to tell. Part of her wanted to tell Miller, Sammy had only realised during their first lunch together that no one apart from the vicar Paul knew Alec was trans, he needed a support network, someone to rely on. sure she hadn't been much of an excuse for a friend as of recent but Alec spoke highly of her and DS Ellie Miller would probably be a great deal of help to him. He liked few in the police department but she was the few. Sammy wasn't in school but she knew that Miller had children in the local one, she was a good mother and her brother had taken a liking to 'wee Fred' as Alec called him. 'Look I can't tell you that. Such a personal thing should come from the person themselves, when their ready not from someone close to them.' pausing. 'But if you truly care about Alec, you should ask him. You shouldn't be afraid to ask him.'
Miller's breath hitched. In truth she was almost scared to ask, for how should she respond, if he said no it would be awkward as hell and she didn't want to insult him. But if he said yes how was she supposed to support him, keep it from the office. There wasn't exactly a handbook on this- 'You could try amazon?. . .You we're speaking out loud'. OH
whoops
'Thanks Samantha? I'll talk to him after you're back from lunch, thanks for that'
'call me Sammy, and I can wait'