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There were not many things in this world that could stop Fabian's constant inertia.
He was a dancer, he was an adventurer, he was a bloodrush player. When he was tackled, he got back up. When there was something in his way, he twirled around it. When there was a battle, he fought.
This would probably explain why, then, he was shadowboxing in his room, on a Monday morning in the hour before having to get ready for school. The movement soothed him. Yes! It said to him. Yes! In big yellow letters. Today was the day.
Today was the day Fabian Aramais Seacaster would take his rightful place as Riz “The Ball” Gukgak's official prom date!
Well, propose to, anyway. He was trying to work on the “taking” language.
With a final jab, he pumped his fist in the air before heading to the shower.
Here's the thing: he did not have a plan. He would let the moment speak to him. That seemed to have worked thus far. He'd sort of had this thing going on with Riz for a good while, this like, are-we-or-aren't-we thing. It was excellent, very dramatic and homoerotic. Stolen drunk kisses, glances from across the room, quirked smiles and shared laughs, swordfights and target practice. Good stuff! But Fabian was not, er… doing his diligence in communicating what it is he wanted, perhaps. And to his defense, nor was The Ball! The rest of the Bad Kids would joke about them and their camaraderie, sexually of course, and Riz would get cagey about such matters. Indeed, he would get cagey about all matters of the heart.
But that didn't mean Fabian had to be… so cruel, at times. So adamant about denying he held The Ball in any high regard. He couldn't stop it, this sharp and harsh attitude that he'd come to hide behind. Riz had proved time and time again that he was a worthy candidate for Fabian's affections— which, really, shouldn't've been necessary, given how Aelwyn had earned them without proving a damn thing— but he still felt shame about the whole affair. And really, he shouldn't. He shouldn't. He couldn't give a sexy rat's ass that Riz was a man, a goblin, and a total dork. He liked all of those things about him, even.
But then he'd think about how people looked at them and rescind the outstretched hand of affection. It was a very real thing, people's perception of you. It was a scary thing. His father, may Hell serve him well, would never care what anyone thought about him. His father never knew that fear.
Fabian clenched his fist, looking up into the stream of water coming from his showerhead. Yes! Today he shall ask Riz out, and they shall become official! He will no longer hide his love!
If Riz wanted that.
Which he might not.
In which case, Fabian would make a fool of himself and possibly alienate his best friend. Whom he had never so much as even called his best friend before.
Maybe he should try baby steps.
…Nay, nonsense! Seacasters did not believe in baby steps! Seacasters believed in taking the plunge.
He shut off the shower. He also may have power posed in the mirror after he got out. Just to remind himself that he was, indeed, powerful.
He was starting to realize that he was never going to do this without a plan. He had talked to Riz at least three times today without asking him to prom, and it was starting to get frustrating that he couldn't bring himself to do it, he should just do it. Fabian thrusted his sword at his opponent as he worked off this energy. He couldn't decide if he wanted it to be a big deal, or if he wanted it to be their little secret. He got a kind of kick out of imagining them placing bets on how long it would take the rest of the Bad Kids to find out about their clandestine affair, on how many times Riz could sneak contact in while they were around. But would that seem like he wanted to hide it, rather than want it to be a sort of game? He didn't want to give the wrong impression. He had resolved himself to being out and proud, partially because he knew he'd definitely be receiving a surprisingly delicious gay celebration cake from Kristen. And besides, a big elaborate declaration of love was way more Fabian's speed. Maybe he should do it at lunch, in front of all of the Bad Kids— and the rest of the school!
Well, actually, Riz would hate that. And he might be killed by Fabian's many suitors that constantly vie for his attention. A very real possibility at an adventuring school, though thankfully not usually a permanent one.
It could be just in front of the Bad Kids then. They could help him, even. He'd have to be vague, he didn't want them to know per say. But he could tee it up, as it were.
He beat his classmate at the spar with a flourish, satisfied that he knew what to do.
BAD KIDS SANS THE BALL
Fabian Aramais Seacaster: Hello treasured companions!
Fabian's typing was interrupted by a message.
fig: no riz?
Fabian Aramais Seacaster: Yes, well, if you'd let me finish typing, perhaps the purpose of this group chat would be illuminated to you.
He went back to typing his initial message, only to have been interrupted yet again.
🍎🐝🏳️🌈: woa did u guys break up
Fabian Aramais Seacaster: We did no such thing!!
Fabian Aramais Seacaster: We were not dating!!
Fabian Aramais Seacaster: I shall go back to typing my LONG message out now.
Gorg: Hey fabian, i think you forgor to include riz
Fabian Aramais Seacaster: I did not, and you shall not be adding him!!
Gorg: oh okie
Fabian: I am planning a SURPRISE PARTY for TB. This means it shall be kept a SURPRISE from TB. You shall not TALK about the SURPRISE PARTY to TB. I will need assistance with decor and preparing of refreshments (ie, I will need someone to go to the store with me.) It will be tonight at Seacaster Manor. You WILL be there and you WILL not tell TB.
Gorg: TB?
Fabian Aramais Seacaster: The Ball.
Adaine: Is Riz's birthday not in October?
Fabian did not think about the fact that he would need a reason to throw a party for Riz beforehand.
Fabian Aramais Seacaster: It's a SURPRISE party. If we did it near his birthday it wouldn't be a SURPRISE. He is a PRIVATE INVESTIGATOR.
Adaine: …If you say so…
fig: kinda last minute but im always down to clown
🍎🐝🏳️🌈: lmk if i need to bring a gayke
Fabian almost told her to, just for the thrill of it. But nay! He shall save gayke for later.
Fabian Aramais Seacaster: Heading to Gorgug's. Meet there.
He opened another text chat.
RIZ “THE BALL” GUKGAK
Fabian Aramais Seacaster: Sparring at mine tonight? 7 PM perhaps?
He tried very hard not to look at his phone in the two minutes between that message and the next buzz.
Riz “The Ball” Gukgak: k!
Fabian pumped his fist in the air, having successfully lured The Ball to his house under false pretenses.
Here was the plan, which he expertly crafted in the van on their way to the store:
Riz would arrive, everyone would yell surprise. He would be shocked, looking to Fabian for some sort of reasoning. Fabian would laugh, and say, I wanted to get the upper hand on you! Then, he would pull out his sword.
Win or lose, he'd ask Riz to the prom. Win and it'd be a sort of hot power imbalance thing, lose and he'd have the power stripped from him, which was, strangely, equally hot. Then they would dance, and make merry, and he'd reveal to Kristen the box of cake and the tin of icing he had snuck into his basket and subsequently his plastic bag after checking out.
It would be the stuff of legends.
The first part, sneaking the cake, had been easy enough. Though he wasn't built for being sneaky, per say, but he was rather dexterous, and sleight of hand and stealth were both dexterity based skills. He got lemon, as that was Riz's favorite flavor. He supposed this would be his gayke too, so it seemed like the appropriate gesture.
The second part was decorating Seacaster manor to look like a party was occurring within three hours. Or, more accurately, two hours and fifty minutes, since Riz was notoriously early for things. They managed to get it done in the nick of time.
As he saw Sklonda's car pull into the driveway, he urged everyone to hide. Kristen was so abhorrently bad at it that he just threw a sheet over her. He got into position, lazily sat upon his chair in the living room. It was important for these sparring sessions that Riz got his sneaks in, but he wouldn't be surprised by him.
Perception check…
Fabian smirked, dodging an arrow. His mama had told them no gunplay inside.
Riz revealed himself, rushing towards him and then stopping, looking around. “Are you… having a party?”
Part three. “Now!” He called out.
“Surprise!” They all shout.
Riz's tail flicked as he looked all around him. “I… uhm, thanks but, I feel like I'm two steps behind on this, what are we celebrating?”
Fabian let out a dark chuckle. “Indeed, you are two steps behind!” He swung, clocking Riz with the butt of his sword.
“Hey!” Riz yelped, slashing at him with his own sword. “That's playing dirty!”
“I'm a fucking pirate's son!” Fabian laughed gleefully as their fight continued.
They had known each other well by this point, Fabian's advantage was quickly lost as Riz got back into the swing of battle.
Finally, he disarmed Riz, and took the opportunity to pin him down with his sword. This was where the fight usually ended, with both of them covered in sweat, one of them conceding defeat. Fabian knew he looked wild, manic, he knew he looked pleased to have won. Riz looked defiant, even though he knew he had lost. There was still bite in that spirit, and Fabian knew any wrong move would allow him to lunge for his weapon.
Fabian laughed deeply. “Very well then. As the winner of this battle, I only have one thing to say.” He announced.
Everybody was looking at him. Everybody was looking very confusedly at him.
“Riz Gukgak,” he looked Riz in the eye, and now everybody was very, very confusedly at him. Good. Let them be confused! They could never understand his love! Fabian's heart was pounding as Riz's eyes surveyed him, unsure of what would happen next. He almost looked concerned. “Will you accompany me, Fabian Seacaster, to prom?”
Nobody in the room moved. In fact, the air was very awkward. He wasn’t sure why, he was pretty sure he looked really cool and sexy right now.
But Riz, looked down at the tip of his blade, looked back up at Fabian. His eyes went wide as he looked at the rest of their friends, and he looked… he looked scared.
Fabian lowered his sword, and Riz scurried away before he could offer a hand to help him up.
Fabian sat shell shocked as people argued around him and possibly at him. Though he was pretty sure that maybe the arguing at him had stopped after he was clearly so dejected by the rejection that it was obvious this wasn't a very mean-spirited prank. Which of course it wasn't, and he couldn't believe they thought he would do something like that, to The Ball no less.
Then again, he did still call him “The Ball,” so maybe it wasn't far fetched.
It was Kristen who sat down next to him, breaking away from the arguers, who were actually just mostly Adaine and Fig. “Hey.”
She made to put a hand on his shoulder and he jolted away from it.
She held it up peacefully. “Alright, no touch right now, I can respect it.”
He relaxed a little.
“So, hey. How are you… how are you feeling about, y'know… what happened?”
Fabian spluttered before retreating back into his shell, into the cool, unaffected jock who did not just get rejected by his crush shell. “It's whatever.” He crossed his arms and leaned back, looking away from her.
She furrowed her brow. “Hey, I get it, it's rough out here. But, if you need to talk about it…”
“I'm fine.” He scoffed, knowing very well the only people who ever said ‘I'm fine’ never were. “Why're you comforting me, anyways, I clearly don't need… I mean, go comfort The Ball.”
Adaine snapped her head in his direction from under the sofa, where she was on her knees looking. “We can't find him, otherwise we would.”
Fabian frowned. “Oh.”
And because it was all Fabian knew how to do, he got up, and he moved.
Everybody protested him going to find The Ball. Which, fair, he probably was in quite a state, as was Riz. But what they were forgetting was it was his house, and Riz had hidden there many times. He knew his favorite spots.
Fabian went to his bedroom and opened up his freshly empty hamper.
“How'd you…” Riz began as he looked up, stopping once he saw Fabian.
“You like this one. You can see through the wicker but it the holes are tight enough to not be able to see you,” Fabian replied, even though the question was never fully asked. “You said you liked hiding in my room because you like my taste in candle scents. I figured you wanted to be somewhere…” he paused, stumbling through an explanation, “...That you liked.”
Riz stared up at him, and Fabian stared down at him, and good lord this was awkward.
“If you'd rather talk to Adaine—” Fabian started.
Riz furrowed his brow. “What would I have to talk to Adaine about? She didn't look like she was in on this.”
“Well, I just thought…” Fabian looked away. “That if it's a feelings thing, I'm sort of… bad at that.” He scratched his chin nervously.
Riz looked at him with his calculating eyes, and must've flubbed his insight, because he just sighed, sort of angrily, and said, “I don't think it takes being good at feelings to know that what you did was a dick move.”
And Fabian didn't know what the fuck that meant, which was maybe part of the problem. “What do… are you serious? I tried to… and I… you're not the only one who's hurt, Riz,” he bit out bitterly, and he knew it was harsh, but he was also just rejected by his crush, and that blows! Just because his crush was allowed to reject him didn't mean that that didn't suck!
“Oh, sorry!” Riz returned the acrid tone. “Sorry that our friends don't think it's funny when you humiliate me in front of them! Sorry that they also care about how I feel.”
“Wh— why do you feel humiliated?” Fabian turned back, suddenly hyper aware of all the reasons he'd ever been embarrassed to be seen with Riz, and thinking about how it was just as embarrassing to be seen with Fabian. He wasn't smart, not in any way that mattered, he was a spoiled, emotionally stunted jock who would never live up to what his father was.
Riz had his hackles raised, “Because I thought I was going to hang out with my best friend, alone, and instead I have my ass beat in front of all my other friends, and then I'm made fun of for—! For…” he looked at Fabian, who was wildly out of the loop.
“I think I'm two steps behind,” Fabian said cautiously. “Who is making fun of you? I'll kick their ass.”
Riz, for his part, looked a little horrified. “...You were being for real.”
“It really does not make me feel good that all of you seem to think so little of my affection for you,” Fabian pouted, but he did think he earned it.
Riz, still looking horrified, repeated, “You were being for real.”
Okay, maybe he could stand to not look so distraught at the idea. “Yes, it was…” he could feel the tips of his ears heating up as he looked away again. “It was supposed to be cool.”
“I just… hold on.” Riz clamored out of the hamper. “I just didn’t think you liked me that much.”
Fabian scoffed. “I have kissed you.”
“When we were drunk. You've also kissed Kristen Applebees,” Riz pointed out.
“Kristen Applebees has kissed me,” he defended. “Why would I… I mean, of course I like you. I've always… And I wouldn't… even if I didn't… which of course I do… but even if I didn't…"
Riz padded over and grabbed Fabian's hand. He sighed, running his other hand through his hair. “You're right, you wouldn't, even if you didn't. I'm… fuck, now I'm the asshole…” He looked away. “I don't… I don't know how I feel about this kind of stuff… I like… I don't like thinking about it. And I guess that freaked me out, because I never thought you’d… I mean… with you… I kinda do sometimes… like thinking about it. But it never seemed like… I guess I just felt like I was always being so obvious, that by now you would've already… said your piece.”
Fabian chuckled. “You act like I’ve been looking for clues.”
Riz looked a bit sad. “It’s what I’ve been doing.”
Fuck.
Fabian leaned down, close to Riz’s face. He looked him in the eye. “I promise from now on I will give you so many clues.”
Riz burst out laughing.
“Stop! I’m being serious! The Ball!”
“I’ll tell you what,” Riz smirked, “How about we work a bit more on reading each other.”
Fabian raised an eyebrow. “Oh?”
“Yeah,” Riz smiled, gesturing for Fabian to come closer, as if to tell a secret. “I’ll let you figure out what this means,” he whispered. Then he moved Fabian’s face and kissed his lips gently.
It took a full minute of chasing Riz around Seacaster manor before he was able to tackle-pin him down and kiss-attack his stupid face.
He was always enamored by how good box cake could taste. Fabian had had fancy lemon cake before, the kind with actual lemons in it, but this was perhaps the one instance where the common version was far superior to the rich people version.
“Why'd you get lemon? I'm not the one who came out,” Riz laughed.
“Well, it felt wrong to—” Fabian's mind caught up to what he said. “The Ball, what are you talking about? You're going to prom with me.” He said this partially as a gloat. “A man.” He clarified.
“You're a boy at best,” Fig rolled her eyes.
“Well…” Riz bit at his thumb claw. “I guess… I'm just… I haven't done the coming out part yet. Like, I'm still figuring out the whole rest of my deal. The man part’s not the only part. It may not even be the most relevant part.”
Fabian thought about what he had said for a few moments. Was Fabian… did he like girls? He thought he liked Aelwyn, kind of. He definitely liked Riz. He just sort of took that and ran with it. “Maybe it's too soon for gayke…” he said absently.
Kristen shook her head, “The gayke does not care if you know what label to put on yourself. The gayke just cares that you're a part of the family.”
Fabian mimed vomiting, in spite of appreciating the sentiment.
After their gayke, they all settled down, played some music and chatted. He had his hand in The Ball's hair, to which Kristen feigned disgust, to which he reminded her she's way worse and it's his house.
A song with a good beat came on and he got a wicked idea. He leaned down and muttered into Riz's ear, “Rematch?”
Riz grinned. “What are the stakes?”
“Winner gets to drive the loser to prom?” Fabian smirked.
“You'll be eating those words when you have to get a hundred pictures of me and you taken by Sklonda Gukgak,” he laughed, sliding away. And maybe he wouldn't admit it, maybe he was still bad at admitting things, but that prospect thrilled him.
Of course, that didn't mean he'd go easy on The Ball. They bounded around each other, Fabian with a good hit, Riz responding with a great one. In many ways, it looked like a dance all their own. Ultimately, Fabian found himself pinned to the floor, under Riz's blade.
Fabian was always in motion, always looking for the next opportunity to get back on his feet and move.
All he wanted in that moment, with his eyes locked on Riz's, was to stay where he was.