Chapter Text
Gumshoe couldn't help but sigh and glance at the clock on the wall near his desk, it currently read 4:45pm. He had been told by the Chief Detective that if by 5 p.m. he hadn't been assigned to a case that he could clock out from his detective work and then he could do another very important task.
Twice a month Gumshoe would go to Chief Prosecutor Mile Edgeworth's office and clean it for him, this had started when Mister Edgeworth had been in his normal office and now Gumshoe was continuing to clean Mister Edgeworth’s new office.
Ironically enough, Mister Edgeworth hadn't initially asked him to clean his first office. It was just something that Gumshoe had chosen to do. After a while he had gotten so used to Gumshoe cleaning the office that he had given him a key both for his old office and now for the Chief Prosecutor's office.
"Dick, if you can't focus on your paperwork then just clock out already." " A voice from behind Gumshoe said suddenly, causing the man to jump quite a bit.
"I'm sorry sir, I'll go back to work." Gumshoe said, jumping to his feet in embarrassment when he saw the Chief detective standing in front of him.
"No it's alright, by the time you get to the time clock it'll be 5 p.m. anyway, just go ahead and go." The Chief said with an amused sigh.
"Well, if you're sure Sir. Thank you." Gumshoe said, scratching the back of his head in an embarrassed way.
"I'm sure, Dick. Now go on and get clocked out." The Chief said, stepping out of Gumshoe's way so he could start walking toward the time clock.
"I still don't understand why you clean the Chief Prosecutor's office, it's not like he pays you to do it." The Chief tried to grumble quietly, once he thought Gumshoe could no longer hear him.
Despite the fact that he had in fact heard what the Chief had said, Gumshoe chose to ignore the comment as he clocked out. Truth be told, Mister Edgeworth HAD originally offered to pay him; but Gumshoe had refused because he didn't clean the office for Mister Edgeworth out of wanting more money.
Of course, Mister Edgeworth had been surprised when Gumshoe had refused payment and though he still didn’t think that Gumshoe had noticed; the detective had in fact noticed that whenever he cleaned the Chief Prosecutor’s office that his salary remained the same and wasn't under threat of being lowered, even if he happened to have messed something up on a case before the cleaning had taken place or even a few days after it.
Not that Gumshoe ever MEANT to mess things up of course, he legitimately did try. Sometimes he just did things on a case without thinking and that always caused trouble.
"At least when I clean Mister Edgeworth's office I'm doing something that's useful. I just wish I could do better for him as a detective." Gumshoe thought to himself, sighing out loud as he thought this.
"I just need to focus on cleaning the office for now. I can worry about doing better as a detective when I get my next case. Alright, let's do this!" Gumshoe continued to think to himself in a more determined way as he reached the door to the Chief Prosecutor's office.
Filled with determination, Gumshoe was quick to pull out the office key and unlocked the door. Now feeling too excited to begin cleaning as he opened the door, Gumshoe failed to notice a small light coming from the office or the fact that there were also noises coming from the office.
As Gumshoe entered, however, his attention was quickly drawn to a fairly loud moan coming from nearby and his eyes were automatically drawn to where the sound was coming from.
Gumshoe's eyes widened in surprise at the sight before him. Laying on top of the desk, naked as the day he was born, was Mister Edgeworth and on top of him was and equally naked Phoenix Wright; who Gumshoe could see had an iron grip on the prosecutor's hips and was thrusting against, and presumingly inside him, for all he was worth.
Gumshoe couldn't help but continue to stare for a moment in shock as the two went at it. Eventually, however, he realized that this was something he definitely wasn't so supposed to see and quietly backed up towards the door.
The two men had been too busy with each other to notice that he had come in and as he reached for the door handle that was behind his back, Gumshoe prayed quietly to himself that they would continue to be oblivious to him being there.
As quietly as he could, Gumshoe opened the door and carefully made his way into the hall. He was certain that he had succeeded in getting out of the office without the men noticing when suddenly he heard footsteps coming down the hall.
The door was still wide open wide open and if Gumshoe didn't close the door quickly then there was a possibility that whoever was coming would see the two men together. Not wanting this to happen, and despite knowing there would likely be consequences for himself later, Gumshoe quickly closed the office door and locked it just quickly behind him; which he knew had made enough noise for the men inside the office to have noticed.
"Oh It's just you, Gumshoe. I thought I heard noise coming from this way and decided to see what was going on." The Night time Security Guard said, appearing from around the corner.
"Sorry if I worried you. I just came to clean Mister Edgeworth's office but realized after coming all the way up here that I forgot the key in my locker." Gumshoe said, rubbing the back of his head and doing his best to look embarrassed.
"Well damn, if I'd known that I would have brought my master key ring with me, it has a key to this office on it. I can go back and get it if you like." The Security Guard offered kindly.
"Nah, it's okay Pal. I'll just clean the office tomorrow morning before my shift starts." Gumshoe said with an appreciative chuckle.
"Oh, alright. Well if you're sure. Anyway, I'll see you later Gumshoe; gotta get back to my rounds now." The Security guard said politely.
"Right, see you later Pal." Gumshoe said with a quick wave as the security guard started walking away.
"Oh thank god he's gone." Gumshoe added to himself with a relieved sigh once the guard was well out of earshot.
"Guess I better be going too, don't want him to come back and see I'm still here after I told him I didn't have my key." Gumshoe out loud with a sigh, also noticing that he could no longer hear noise coming from the door behind him.
Feeling completely embarrassed, Gumshoe wasted no time making his way down the hall to the stairs that led back down to the precinct, once he was down he was spotted by a very surprised Chief Detective but he was quick to give the same excuse he had given the security guard. Luckily for Gumshoe, the Chief bought the excuse, just as the guard had done, and had allowed Gumshoe to leave without questioning him. It was all Gumshoe could do to not sprint outside to his car once the chief had allowed him to go and as he drove home he couldn't help but think about what he had witnessed earlier.
"They'll know I was there, they had to have heard me close the door and they definitely heard me talking to the security guard or they wouldn't have stayed so quiet. Also, Mister Edgeworth knows that I'd never forget my key after personally telling me to always keep close while I'm at work; so he'll realize I saw the two of them like that." Gumshoe thought to himself as he drove.
"I wonder what he's going to do now. Am I going to be fired because I saw them together? I sure hope not. It WAS surprising to see, but at the same time it's not really that surprising that they're together like that." Gumshoe continued to think to himself as he continued to drive.
"I suppose there's no use worrying about it now. I'll likely find out tomorrow what's going to happen next." Gumshoe said out loud with a sigh as he reached his apartment building.
Feeling more exhausted than he had in a long time Gumshoe trudged up the stairs that led to his apartment, feeling temporarily happier and distracted as his dog Missile jumped on him happily. Still, as he petted the excited canine and quickly got both the dog and himself something to eat, Gumshoe couldn't help but wonder what he would be facing the next morning.
...
The Next Day:
Gumshoe woke up long before his alarm ever went off, he’d hardly slept at all due to his nervousness. Still, despite being exhausted he forced himself to get up and get ready. After quickly feeding both himself and Missile breakfast, Gumshoe took Missile outside to do his business and then put his beloved canine back inside before heading back outside and making his way to the apartment parking lot where his car was parked.
He almost hesitated for a moment after getting into his car but then quickly snapped himself out of it. Sitting here in his car would not stop Mister Edgeworth or Mister Wright from eventually confronting him about what he had seen; so with that in mind Gumshoe started his car and began driving. Gumshoe was normally very happy that he lived fairly close by, it meant that on his two fifteen minute breaks he could quickly come home and let Missile outside. Today, however, he almost wished that he lived just a little bit further as he pulled into the precinct parking lot.
After pulling into his assigned spot, Gumshoe sat in his car for just a moment longer then he normally would. He quickly took a calming breath before shutting his car off and made his way inside the building.
"On the plus side I'm super early today, even Mister Edgeworth shouldn't be here this early." Gumshoe thought to himself as he got inside.
"Dick? What on earth are you doing here so early? You don't have to clock in for another hour yet!" The Chief said in a clearly surprised way as he saw Gumshoe.
"Yeah, I know Chief. But that gives me plenty of time to clean Mister Edgeworth's office. I feel so bad that I forgot my key last night, and I want to make it up by getting the office cleaned before he even gets here." Gumshoe explained, remembering his excuse from last night and giving the Chief an embarrassed smile.
"Well you're in luck, because he's definitely not here yet. Still, and I know it's probably none of my business, you treat Mister Edgeworth far too well considering he's always telling me to dock your pay." The Chief said in a surprisingly stern and confused sounding tone.
"Says the guy who doesn't have enough of a backbone to tell Mister Edgeworth NO and DOES dock my pay whenever he's told too." Gumshoe thought to himself quickly, though answering just as quickly out loud.
"Yeah, maybe. But I respect Mister Edgeworth, Sir. And I know that he just wants me to learn from my mistakes and also wants me to do better." Gumshoe explained out loud with a shrug.
"Anyway, I should probably head up to the office and start cleaning. Like I said, I want it to be clean before he gets here." Gumshoe said in a more insistent way when it looked like the Chief was going to comment on what he had just said.
Without another word, Gumshoe quickly turned on his heels and made his way up the stairs that led to the prosecutor's offices. He then made his way down the hall to where Mister Edgeworth's office was and unlocked the door.
Gumshoe couldn't help but stare over at the desk for a moment as he came into the office. Other then desk lamp, which had been on the floor with it's lampshade knocked off the night before but was now in its proper spot, he could see no evidence of what had happened here the night before. Nonetheless, that didn't stop Gumshoe from remembering what he had seen and though he was still embarrassed from having witnessed such a private moment, he mentally pulled himself together and went to the closet where his cleaning supplies were because he had a job to do.
"And I'm starting by cleaning that damn desk. Honestly, I hope those two didn't scratch it up. I work hard to make sure it looks nice for Mister Edgeworth!" Gumshoe thought to himself as he put his cleaning gloves on, got the duster and the wood polish that he used specifically for the desk, and then made a beeline for it.
"Well, it doesn't look like they scratched it. I suppose I should have more faith in Mister Edgeworth. He'd never forgive Mister Wright if they ruined his nice desk." Gumshoe thought to himself in a somewhat relieved way as he examined the desk.
"Still, I'm going to thoroughly clean this beauty. Honestly, what is up with those two? Doing that on the desk when there's a perfectly good couch nearby?" Gumshoe continued to think to himself as he first dusted the desk and then moved on to polishing.
"I mean, you're a good desk, don't get me wrong. But you can't be very comfortable to lay on top of." Gumshoe muttered out loud to himself as he continued to polish the desk.
"Though I suppose that at the time they weren't really thinking of how comfortable you are. They had OTHER things on their minds." Gumshoe continued to mutter quietly to himself out loud, smirking ever so slightly at his own comment and he looked at the newly polished desk.
"Oh god, what am I doing thinking about things like that?! That's Mister Edgeworth and Mister Wright's business! I need to focus and get on with cleaning." Gumshoe said out loud to himself in an embarrassed way once he realized what he'd been thinking and talking to himself about this whole time.
Now more determined than ever, Gumshoe quickly moved away from the desk and began his other cleaning task. First, he had to dust the bookshelves; and since there were a lot of them in this office he got to work immediately. Once he finished doing that, Gumshoe also dusted the separate shelf that had some trophies and other knickknacks on it.
With the polishing done, Gumshoe pulled the vacuum out of the cleaning supply closet and plugged into a nearby outlet. Before turning the vacuum on, Gumshoe sprayed the carpet with carpet cleaner. This particular cleaning method was something he only did once a month, since the carpet stayed clean for a while, but it had been a bit since he had done so and he wanted the carpet to look perfect for Edgeworth.
Once the carpet had been thoroughly sprayed, Gumshoe turned on the vacuum. He made sure to just as thoroughly vacuum the floor as he had with the spray. Eventually, he was satisfied with how it looked and after turning off and unplugging the vacuum he put it back in the closet before moving on to the windows. Mister Edgeworth had large windows in his office and a fairly nice view outside of them; though being afraid of heights as he was, Gumshoe knew that the Chief Prosecutor probably didn't look out of the window much.
Regardless of whether Mister Edgeworth looked out of them much or not, Gumshoe was still going to clean them. It was inexcusable to leave them unclean when the rest of the office was so nice now and, with that in mind, Gumshoe quickly pulled over his step ladder and set to work on the windows.
"There we go, all clean now." Gumshoe muttered to himself out loud once he had the window sparkling.
"Time to look around and see if I missed anything." Gumshoe continued to mutter to himself as he carefully stepped off of his step ladder and made his way over to the office entrance.
"Doesn't look like I missed anything. Well, except for all my cleaning supplies. Time to get everything put back in the closet where it belongs." Gumshoe said to himself with a pleased smile before beginning to go around the room and collecting all of his cleaning supplies.
"There, now everything is perfect." Gumshoe said out loud to himself in a proud way after putting everything back in the closet and once again making his way towards the office door.
"I still have just enough time to take a quick shower in the locker room before I clock in. I don't want to look too dirty, even if I am a detective." Gumshoe said, turning himself towards the door to open it when to his surprise a very familiar figure opened it before he could.
Gumshoe froze in shock at the sight of Mister Edgeworth and the well dressed man in front of him looked equally shocked to see him as well, there was a brief moment of awkward silence between the two until it was Mister Edgeworth that broke it.
"Hello Detective Gumshoe, I didn't expect to see you so early. Your shift still doesn't start for a bit, yes?" Edgeworth said in a polite but slightly tensed way as he tried to make small talk with Gumshoe.
"Hello Mister Edgeworth, Sir. Yeah I still have a little bit before I start my shift. I just got done cleaning your office and I was going to…" Gumshoe started to explain in an embarrassed way when he was interrupted.
"Ah I see, in that case would you mind taking a moment to speak to me." Edgeworth asked in a polite tone, though clearly determined that Gumshoe speak with him.
"Of course, Sir. Though I will warn you, I'm a little sweaty and probably covered in dust from cleaning." Gumshoe said in a polite but also embarrassed way.
"That's fine, you may take a shower when we're done speaking. I will explain to the Chief Detective that I took up your time if you're late for shift." Edgeworth said calmly.
"Alright then. Thank you, Sir." Gumshoe said in an appreciative way as he moved aside so Mister Edgeworth could come into his own office.
"Sit won't you, I need to get something and then we'll speak." Edgeworth said gesturing towards the empty chair in front of his desk, which he headed over to himself.
"Yes Sir, of course." Gumshoe said politely before doing as instructed and taking a seat.
As Gumshoe watched Mister Edgeworth go through his desk, looking for whatever it was he was after, he couldn't help but feel a bit nervous. Gumshoe knew good and well what the Chief Prosecutor was going to talk to him about, and he wondered how the conversation was going to go.
"Detective Gumshoe, I'm sure you don't need me to tell you why I wanted to speak to you." Edgeworth said after he had found whatever it was he'd been after in his desk.
"No Sir, you don't. I know what this is about." Gumshoe admitted with a sigh.
"Then you'll know that I find myself in quite the conundrum. Despite having not currently gotten his badge back yet, Phoenix Wright was once a defense attorney; thus it would be ill advised for anyone to find out that we are together." Edgworth explained pulling out a small red leather booklet, from which he also pulled out a small slip of paper.
"Wait, what are you doing Sir?" Gumshoe asked in a completely confused way as he watched Edgeworth write something down on the paper and also signed his name on it.
"I am giving you this check as a means of ensuring your silence on the matter, Detective Gumshoe. If the amount is not to your liking then I will be more than willing to raise it. As I said, it would be ill advised for anyone to learn that Wright and I are a couple." Edgeworth said in a simple and logical way.
"You're bribing me to keep quiet?!" Gumshoe asked, speaking much louder than he had intended because of how shocked he was.
"Shh! Keep your voice down Detective Gumshoe. To answer your question, yes. I suppose I AM bribing you, but you must realize that I wouldn't do so unless…" Edgeworth said in a slightly panicked way at first, briefly regaining composure but stopping midsentence as Gumshoe took the check in his hand and glared at it.
"Detective Gumshoe, are you alright? As I said, if that amount is not to your liking I can always…" Edgeworth started to say, in a surprisingly desperate sounding way, when to his shock Gumshoe angrily stood up from his chair, ripped the check up in front of him, and slammed his hands angrily on the desk.
"What kind of man do you take me for, Pal?! I'm done speaking to you, I need to go before I lose it!" Gumshoe said in a loud and extremely angry way, storming out of the office before Edgeworth could process what had just happened.
"Dick? Are you okay?" The Chief asked in surprise as Gumshoe came storming down the stairs.
"I'm taking the day off Chief, I can't be here right now!" Gumshoe said firmly, leaving no room for argument; which was very unlike how he usually acted.
"Of course Dick, try to enjoy your day off." The Chief said, giving his blessing without hesitating; he had never seen Gumshoe so angry before in his life.
"Thank you Sir, I'll see you tomorrow." Gumshoe managed to say in a semi polite way before he very quickly made his way to the employee entrance of the precinct.
"Good lord above Mister Edgeworth! What the hell did you do to get Dick Gumshoe of all people so angry?!" Gumshoe heard the Chief ask loudly right as he opened the door to go into the parking lot.
Though he couldn't confirm it, since he was now outside, it seemed that Mister Edgeworth had apparently followed him downstairs. Honestly, right now Gumshoe didn't care about any of that and wasted no time getting into his car; all he wanted right now was to get as far away from the precinct and from Mister Edgeworth as possible. With that task in mind, he was quick to start his car up and drive off before the Chief Prosecutor had a chance to come into the parking lot and stop him.