Chapter Text
Will woke up screaming. Which wasn’t too unusual. What was unusual was the sight of several of his closest friends peering over him with shocked, scared eyes. Jolting upwards, Will smacked his head into Robin’s and groaned as pain split across the bridge of his nose.
“Jesus!” Robin exclaimed, pulling back to rub at her head. She stared down at him with accusatory eyes. “No need to give me brain damage, Byers. Steve’s got that covered for the both of us.”
He let out a deep breath. “What is going on?”
Lucas blinked at him. “You were screaming, dude.”
Vaguely uncomfortable in his sweat soaked shirt, Will shifted around on the couch. His throat was sore and scraped raw. When he ran his tongue over the roof of his mouth and towards the back, he felt raised, ridged lines. Rubbing at his face, he pushed Robin away from him and stood up.
“I was sleeping, dude.”
Erica folded her arms, drawing his attention towards her. Allowing it to keep skipping over Mike, who was staring at him with varying levels of intensity.
“Didn’t sound very peaceful,” she snarked.
Will rolled his eyes good naturedly. He gestured at himself up and down. “When does it ever?”
“You were saying no,” Mike reported. Interjecting into the conversation abruptly. His eyes were dark and frustrated. “Over and over.”
Well… okay then.
Swallowing, Will shrugged his shoulders. “I–”
“And go away,” Lucas added on.
A frown creased his face without his prior consent. “What?”
“Yeah,” Robin was nodding her head vigorously. “It was goddamn unsettling, man.”
Unable to help himself, Will made sharp eye contact with Mike. Suddenly the room was a lot colder than it had been just seconds before. Will could generally chalk up saying no on repeat to a lot of things in life. Math tests. Argyle’s driving. Eleven sneaking Eggo’s into the shopping cart. But there was only one person Will had ever screamed at to go away.
“Oh fuck me,” he said.
Mike’s eyebrows shot straight up.
“Excuse me?” Erica drawled.
He knew taking Vecna’s powers and using them was going to come back to bite him in the ass. What were the chances that he’d simply passed out into a coma like sleep after taking out three Demogorgon’s and walking away from his encounter with One like it was nothing. A sleep with no dreams or nightmares that he could recall.
Robin had a sly look in her eye. “Well, that’s a lot more forward than I suggested.”
Mike and Lucas’s heads swiveled towards her. In unison, they said, “uh, what?”
“Thanks Robin,” Will said dryly. His heart was crawling up his throat. “I didn’t say anything else did I? I mean.. Did it seem like I was talking to someone?”
Erica pulled back. “Talking to someone?”
On the contrary, Mike ventured further forward. His hands were tightening into anxious fists at his sides. “Do you think it was Him?”
Lucas immediately started up a chant of “hell no’s” and “oh shit’s” under his breath. Which was frankly, very reassuring to Will currently. Erica made it even better by making a sign like she was warding off evil.
“He’s not about to be possessed again is he?” She questioned.
“Uh,” Robin said, there was a peculiar look on her face. “Did she just say possessed? Again?”
“Don’t be stupid,” Mike snapped. He looked at Will out of the corner of his eye, once, twice. Will supposed he should be flattered at the blatant double take. “Of course he isn’t. He’s normal.”
Lucas pursed his lips. Then he started to do a wild reenactment of the Demogorgon levitating into the air before its bones all snapped grotesquely. Afterwards, he dropped back onto his toes, straightened out his disjointed arms and gave Mike a dubious look.
“Yeah, real regular.”
Will felt his stomach tighten. Was Lucas afraid of him? Or worse, repulsed?
He hadn’t even known what he was doing. It had just felt right. Instinctual. If he would’ve known he was concocting some sort of Vecna-esque snap, crackle, pop ritual, he would’ve… found something different to do.
Probably.
Mike threw his hands up. “Real mature, Lucas. Not like he’s standing in front of you or anything. But sure, be a douchebag and make him feel bad.”
“It’s fine,” Will said. “It’s not like he doesn’t have a point.”
“If Vecna wanted you, he had ample time tonight to take you,” Robin pointed out. She hooked a thumb over her shoulder. “While Wheeler and Mrs. Byer’s were zonked out.”
Will didn’t respond.
She was right. But it still felt… too easy. All of this did.
“I still can’t believe he came out of hiding for the first time in over a year and you didn’t even fucking see it,” Lucas complained at Mike. “Like, hello? Get knocked out much?”
Mike huffed. “It’s not my fault–”
Will ignored the raging flashback those words caused. “Lucas, come on.”
“What?” He said. “What even was the point of that? Like, hey Will, long time no see. Hope you’re doing well. Let me have this weird conversation with you and then dip. Like what? What did he even do that for?”
Will laughed a little and Robin and Mike eyed him severely.
“And then he sends his stupid fucking pets back to finish the job?” Lucas shook his head. “None of this makes sense. Mike, you’ve gotta admit that.”
“Yeah it does,” Mike said.
Will nodded. He’d been thinking about it.
“Henry wanted me to know it was my fault,” Will supplied. This apparently caused Mike’s tirade to stop in its tracks. He had a look on his face that suggested he had no idea what Will was talking about. “I’m the reason why he knew what to do with the kids. And I’m the reason he sent them back. It wasn’t because he was threatened… or angry. He just wanted me to be alone. Isolated.”
Just like him.
Erica made a whooshing sound with her mouth. “That’s obsessive.”
Will side eyed her. “What?”
Lucas was rubbing at the bandaged wound on his stomach from where the Demogorgon had sliced him earlier. His shirt was covered in black blood. Will felt queasy just looking at it.
“I thought he would’ve gone for Eleven, knowing she was in the Upside Down,” Erica confirmed. She sounded so matter of fact. “But he came here for you. Coincidentally at the right time at the right place. It was like he knew you were going to be there.”
A scowl pulled down over Mike’s features. “But what does he want from Will? I mean, why go to all that trouble?”
“It’s like he…” Robin trailed off.
Will raised his eyebrows at her imploringly.
Robin fiddled with her hair. “So you guys read comic books and all that nerdy shit, right?”
Lucas scoffed.
“So you know how there’s always this one supervillain with this really weird interest in the heroine?” Robin asked. “Like he thinks she’s too good for everyone else and should just… like… be with him?”
Will’s cheeks were turning a hot scarlet. “Robin–”
A storm cloud settled over Mike. “What are you suggesting?”
“Like, it’s totally plausible that Vecna, slash One, slash Henry, sees himself in Will,” Robin said, waving her hands around. “I mean, they are a bit similar.”
Thanks. That’s perfect.
Lucas scoffed again. “Similar?”
“Whatever,” Robin said. “You’re missing the point.”
“Which is?” Mike asked. He had his arms folded.
“I mean, didn’t Eleven say that he originally asked her to join him and got all pissed when she said no?” Robin continued. “What if that’s what he’s hoping for in Will. And that’s why he went to all the trouble. Because if Will had no one and was feeling upset and vulnerable, he would’ve been more likely to say yes.”
Everyone’s eyes settled on him, heavily.
Mike shook his head. “But why Will? Like you just said, he originally wanted Eleven. So why not her?”
Robin’s cringe was half formed by the time Will felt the sting settle in at his words.
Suddenly he was more than a little peeved.
“I know this is hard for you to believe Mike,” Will said. “But not everything is about Eleven.”
Lucas coughed. “Um, guys–”
Mike sputtered. “What is that supposed to mean?”
I bet you thought it was El tonight, Will wanted to shout, but it wasn’t her. It was me.
Robin’s eyebrows were steadily climbing up her forehead. Her eyes darted from left to right, like she was unsure if she should step in and change the subject or not. Her hands were pulling at her hair anxiously. It reminded him of her sitting in the back of his mom’s car, tapping her fingers against the headrests as she was reprimanded. The dazed, slightly abashed expression on her face.
Will sighed. “Nothing, Mike. Let’s just forget it, okay?”
Mike scoffed. “Didn’t sound like nothing.”
What did it sound like? Will wanted to demand. Looking at Mike’s sullen pout, Will felt a sudden burst of anger knock him in the chest, like it was forcing its way in, banging the door blocking all his misguided feelings down. God forbid Mike Wheeler realize what was right in front of him.
He violently pushed the thought aside.
Erica’s eyeroll was legendary. “Can we focus, please?”
“You said that they were similar,” Lucas pointed out. Seemingly content to ignore the elephant inching its way into the room. “Do you think that’s why he was taken?”
“I thought it was random,” Erica said. “It’s not like Vecna was stalking Will or anything.”
“He didn’t appear to you as Mr. Whatsit, did he?” Robin asked. Her voice rolled around the fictitious title, sounding almost hysterical. When Will shook his head, Robin began chewing on her bottom lip. “And you never met him before tonight?”
“Of course not!” Mike interjected.
But he must’ve caught a flicker of something on Will’s face. There and gone.
“I think… I think I did.”
Unbidden, Will’s hand crept up to trace over his mouth. Then lower to his throat. It certainly seemed like Vecna had known him. And the things he said. That he took Will because he was weak, unloved, easily broken. It made Will feel like he was a doll sitting on a shelf in the toy store, limbs twisted, eyes and stuffing falling out, watching as no one ever picked him.
He cleared his throat and glanced up to see his friends watching him with fear. “The things he’s doing to the kids. To Holly. He showed me visions of them, stuck to the wall with… a vine down their throat.” Mike’s face blanched and went bloodless. Will figured he was picturing his little sister going through that all alone. “Before he went back into the Upside Down… he showed me visions. And I saw it.”
Lucas barely raised his voice over a whisper. “What?”
“The same thing was happening to me,” Will said. He was proud when he was able to deliver the line without shaking. “But I don’t remember it.”
His eyes glazed.
“I don’t remember any of it.”
Whenever he cast his mind back to his week in the Upside Down, it was as if there was something or someone keeping him from accessing his memories. All he knew was what he’d been told. That he had hidden out in Castle Byers, half dead and still stiffly singing the words to Should I Stay Or Should I Go. Or how his mom and Hopper had found him in the library and had to perform CPR on him.
“Let me get this straight,” Robin said. She was staring at him with dawning comprehension. “You can’t remember anything about the Upside Down? Not how you survived that long on your own? Not when you talked to your mom through the Christmas lights?”
He blinked. “I talked to my mom through the Christmas lights?”
Mike’s eyes were wide. He swallowed and it sounded like a gulp in the strange silence of the room. “And what about El? Didn’t you see her? In the void?”
A white hot throbbing started in the back of his left eye.
Upon witnessing his helpless expression, Lucas buried his face in his hands for a moment, muttering curses under his breath. Then his head shot back up and he glowered at Mike. When he spoke, it was obvious he was quoting something. “Let’s give Will some space, guys. He’s been through a lot. We can’t overwhelm him with questions. When he’s ready he’ll come to us.”
Mike stiffened. “Oh fuck you, Lucas. I thought I was doing the right thing.”
“Clearly!” Lucas argued back. “Good going, man! Let’s just ignore the traumatized eleven year old and go about our year. I don’t see anything wrong with that!”
Mike opened his mouth to speak, eyes flashing.
Will broke in. “Eleven?”
Both boys turned towards him.
“Uh yeah?” Lucas said. “You were eleven when you went missing.”
Robin’s eyebrows pulled together. “So he’s the youngest of the group then?”
Mike’s eyelashes fluttered as he considered. “No–that’s not right. He’s older than I am. By a few weeks. We always had joint birthday’s.” He paused. Confusion split across his face. “We haven’t had a joint celebration since… before the Byers went to Lenora.”
“Maybe your math is off?” Erica suggested to her brother.
Lucas frowned.
Will sat back down, pressing his knuckles to his brow bone. Annoyance and hurt flooded through him. How could his best friends forget his birthday? His age? They’d never do that to Dustin. He thought back to the way his family had skipped over his fifteenth birthday. Mike and Eleven making him the third wheel at the roller rink. His mom taking off and leaving the country with Murray. Almost as if it had never happened.
Will’s eyes rose.
“When’s my birthday?”
Robin whipped her head in his direction.
Neither of the boys answered.
Jesus Christ, Will thought, they forgot my birthday.
“It’s March,” Mike responded. His lips were pressed together tightly. “It’s in March.”
“At the end,” Lucas surmised. “Right?”
Robin held her hands up. “So no one here knows Will’s birthday?”
Erica’s eyes were dark. She shared a surprised look with Will. “So you guys are shitty friends.”
Mike shook his head. “No, we celebrated it last year.”
“No actually,” Will said. “You didn’t.”
His heart was frosting over. Physically freezing in his ribcage. All the ice was crystallizing around his bones. Sending shards into the space between his lungs.
“You missed it,” Will confirmed. “You’ve been missing it.”
Mike’s face dropped. He began shaking his head vigorously. Denying it. Rejecting the possibility altogether. “That’s not possible. We wouldn’t do that to you, Will. Certainly not your mom or Jonathan. You would’ve said something.”
Will smiled at him, tiredly.
“Except he obviously didn’t,” Erica supplied.
Robin’s thoughts were practically visible. Pacing back and forth, she started gesturing madly with her hands. Her fingers were covered with silver rings. They were gleaming in the dim light. Appearing gold tinted in the yellow. “So not only did all of Will’s friends and family conveniently forget his birthday. But Will can’t recall anything from a week of his life. A pretty important one, I might add. And not only that, but Vecna clearly wants something from him. And if Will’s theory is correct, then he sent the demogorgon’s back to alienate Will. And no one is drawing any conclusions?”
“But why?” Mike asked. “Why take our memories in the first place?”
“I don’t know,” Robin said. She stopped her pacing. Beaten up converse squeaking against the floor. “To make him feel lonely? Like he doesn’t matter?”
An outcast.
Even with his own friends.
A child whose parents didn’t care about.
“Like him,” Will said out loud. He couldn’t help imagining Henry in the lab. Even more afraid and abandoned than Eleven was. “He wanted me to feel what he went through.”
Lucas’s breath caught.
Will’s gaze crept up to meet Mike’s searching one.
“And… to make me angry. Bitter.”
To hate the world.
To hate himself.
To be jealous of his sister. Who had gotten everything she ever wanted.
“And… I think it kinda worked.”
Before anyone could let that statement sink in, the door to WSQK opened, allowing cold air to fill through the radio station. Footsteps sounded against the hardwood floor and then Will heard his mom’s voice calling out to them. Robin hollered back and soon Joyce and Murray were coming through the door, eyes rimmed red with exhaustion. Joyce scanned the room and when her eyes landed on Will, she paused, squinting.
“You okay, baby?” She asked.
He nodded, fingers tugging his sleeves down over his hands. She quirked her eyebrows at him for a moment, as if debating on whether or not he was telling the truth. Then she focused on the rest of the Party.
“We made contact with them,” Joyce said finally. Will’s walkie talkie was sticking out of her back pocket, antenna bent at an odd angle. Almost like it was trying to point downwards. “They’re all on their way back. Together.”
Lucas practically collapsed onto the couch next to Will, making the cushions slide out from under him as the sofa jolted with the force. When he leaned back, Lucas winced, rubbing his hand over his stomach where the Demogorgon got him. The relief was vivid on his face, though. It was clear on all their faces.
Not that Will wasn’t. Because God, he worried every time someone flipped and went into the Upside Down. The contrast at how they treated it now versus back then was startling. Right after Will’s disappearance, the Upside Down was believed to be toxic. The air, the spores. The environment as a whole. No food. No water. It was like a completely different planet. An uninhabitable one. And watching all his friends and family head down there with no masks, little food and water, and few weapons made his skin prickle with anxiety.
What are you doing, he wanted to scream, why are you going down there so easily? Like it was some extravagant adventure. Some exciting new place to discover. Jesus, it made Will feel like a crybaby. That he’d just been overreacting when he’d be down there. He’d seen the way Nancy measured him up after she’d come back from there. After she shot Vecna, after they lost Eddie. The whole group had gone in and out of the Upside Down. No problem. Multiple times.
Meanwhile Will had to be dragged in and dragged out.
Sometimes when Nancy looked at him, he wasn’t sure what she was seeing. Or who.
If every time she glanced his way, she wondered why it was him who made it out and not Barb.
“And they’re all okay?” Mike asked. His shoulders were making a home around his ears. His mouth was in a thin, tense line. “They haven’t seen Him?”
Murray shook his head, flashing them a proud smile. “All good, mini Wheeler. They should be back by tomorrow morning. Assuming that Harrington’s car doesn’t give out.”
Mike’s nose wrinkled. “That’s comforting.”
Erica sighed. She side eyed Will from where she was standing. “So what now?”
“We wait,” Joyce affirmed. Her eyes were steely. “We get all the rest we can. And then we’re going to kill this bastard. El’s going to finish it.”
Robin made a gesture at Will and he ignored it. His mom had enough going on with her boyfriend in the Upside Down along with her two other children. She didn’t need the guilt of forgetting his birthday on top of it. And selfishly, Will had liked running off with Robin. Being independent. If Joyce knew that he’d talked to Vecna in his sleep, she’d never let him off the leash. Just wind it around tighter, like a noose.
“I’m going to go crash on one of those big ass chairs over there,” Murray informed them. He had blood coagulated on the side of his head from the car crash. But otherwise he seemed fine. No more shaken up than usual. Although, Will could never get a good read on the guy. “If One shows up, don’t yell for help.”
With that, he turned on his heel and left.
“He’s kidding,” Joyce said, rolling her eyes good naturedly. “If anything happens you will come and get me, understand? And I mean anything. A goddamn gust of wind blows in through the window and I will be the first to know.”
Erica’s mouth twitched like something was funny.
Mike and Robin nodded.
She smiled at all of them. After a few more probing questions, she too disappeared down the hall. Hopefully finding somewhere to sleep, far away from Murray and his chair. Not that Will thought that anything was going on there, but still.
Lucas slumped further down into the couch. His eyes were half lidded. “I should probably go phone my parents and let them know that we’re safe.”
Erica waved him off. “I already did that. I told them that I’m spending the night at Jessica’s and that you’re having a sleepover at the Henderson’s house.” She gave Lucas a firm look. “I’m getting really tired of covering for you.”
Raising his hands like he was about to be shot at, Lucas smiled at her sheepishly.
Silence overtook them.
Mike made eye contact with Will and he looked right back at him. Mike’s gaze was unwavering. A physical presence that stuck like glue. Leaving residue everywhere his eyes swept over. Will wanted to know what he was thinking. If he was hurt or scared or even hungry. But he didn’t want to ask. Whatever courage he’d gained earlier was all but drained out of him now.
It wasn’t like Mike reciprocated anyway.
Will’s cheeks warmed under the scrutiny and caught Robin’s eye as he glanced away. She was chewing her bottom lip, ripping off dead skin with her teeth.
“Shouldn’t we have said something?” Robin blurted. “To like, Joyce? Or an adult?”
“You’re an adult,” Erica informed her. “We told you.”
Robin seemed offended by that for God knows what reasons.
“We will,” Mike said. He folded his arms. “Tomorrow, when we’re all back together.”
Will looked out the window at the darkness. The inky blackness that coated the Hawkins skyline. Despite sitting inside with the furnace, he could feel the chill seeping into his veins. Taking over his body.
Everyone settled in for the night; Erica and Lucas camped out on the floor with projector screens as blankets, Robin leaned back against the couch, head tipped at an uneasy angle, and Mike on the couch next to him, but tucked into himself.
Will didn’t sleep.
***
The Party crashed back together almost explosively the next day. Will could barely keep up with all the shouting and theorizing, at one point El had introduced them to her sister Kali, while Dustin crowed about the wall in the Upside Down hiding Hawkins Lab. Things were moving so fast that Will felt like he was seeing through a camera lens. Watching the reels flicker and cast shadows over him.
Mike and Lucas, of course, had taken great satisfaction in being part of the group with the biggest bomb to drop. The pair had taken it upon themselves to create a wild reenactment with Mike pretending to be Will, while Lucas “levitated” in the air. Will felt a little hot under the collar when Mike ran a hand across his nose, like he was wiping off blood, eyes dark. Because for one thing, Will definitely did not look that intense. And for another, Robin had been staring daggers into his soul for the whole conversation.
Did Will purposely make eye contact with Mike after killing the Demogoron’s? Of course not. His vision had been blurry, okay. He could barely see. Mike just happened to be there.
Whatever.
Things got even crazier when Robin and Erica told them about what they’d discovered last night. It had been uncomfortable, watching his mom’s face crumple with guilt. The way Jonathan wrapped him up in a hug and held on for dear life.
Despite wishing everyone would notice him for years now, Will sure felt a lot better in the background. He wanted to go back to it. With his face outside of the camera lens, an outline of his shoulder just barely being included in the reel.
Thankfully, Hopper and Nancy had switched gears, successfully distracting the group. Which led him to this current moment, standing in the back of the room, doing his level best not to make a face as the beginnings of a plan were being formed.
Up front, Nancy and Hopper controlled the projector. Nancy was twiddling with a blue marker as she drew a large circle around an image of Hawkins lab on the map. Dustin was standing just off to the side. His eyes were bruised thanks to his broken nose and his cheeks were puffy and yellow. Steve was sitting on the edge of a desk, shoulders brushing Jonathan’s anytime either one of them so much as moved an inch. Each time it happened it made Jonathan’s lips twitch like he was fighting back a sour expression.
Across the room, El sat with Kali on the floor, holding hands. She’d sent a searching look at Will when his powers had been revealed but other than that she hadn’t had any outward reaction to it.
Joyce was on the outskirts of the room, leaning against the wall. Her eyes were sharp, but they kept landing on Hopper. Then they’d flicker over to Will. As if she were keeping track of him.
Which left Will to stand in the back with Robin, since Lucas and Mike had crept forward during their little production to stand off to the side of the table with Nancy and Hopper, frowning at the screen.
“If Dustin’s right and we can get through the wall,” Nancy said. She drew a little stick figure in the middle of it. The girl had a dress and poorly drawn pigtails. “Then that’s where Henry must be keeping Holly and the kids.”
“But how do we get in?” Steve asked. “You heard El, she can’t get it to open.”
Hopper folded his arms. “Let’s not forget about the military loitering around, either. Even if El was able to get back in the Upside Down and somehow managed to get the wall to move, we’d still have to be on the lookout for them.”
“Couldn’t El just… you know?” Robin made a cut throat gesture.
“Not with those things on the top of their vans,” Hopper responded. He always sounded so gruff.
“The kryptonite,” Dustin added thoughtfully. Will could visibly see the wheels spinning in his mind. He turned to El and Kali. “It affects both of you, right?”
Kali nodded.
“Then it must affect him too,” Dustin finished. “Vecna.”
The two girls shared a look.
“I had not thought about it,” El said carefully. “But yes… it should hurt him too.”
Robin wound her hair around her index finger. “So that pretty much guarantees that we have a way to stop him. At least temporarily. If we could get our hands on one of those things, we’d actually have a shot.”
Mike rolled his eyes. “Except for the part where it works on Eleven and Kali too. How are we supposed to fight him then? Shooting at him didn’t work out so great the last time.”
Jonathan made a humming noise, agreeing.
Nancy pursed her lips. “So you’d need a team to go down there with El and Kali. Someone that isn’t affected.” She drew some more stick figures around the wall. Both had their hands out. “If Kali could create an illusion, then we’d be able to sneak in and out undetected and take one of those things. The kryptonite.”
Hopper frowned. “I can do it. It makes the most sense. I’ve been to the Upside Down more than anybody in the past couple of months.”
Joyce bit her lip. Will’s eyes scanned the livid red welts around Hopper’s throat from where he’d been almost strangled to death. It had been obvious when he’d arrived that his body wasn’t physically able to carry on anymore.
“Hop–”
Robin cut off the argument before it could even start. “Let’s put a pin in it. For now we should be focusing on the bigger picture. It doesn’t matter who goes in and who stays up here. What matters is how we’re even getting back in the Upside Down and how Eleven is going to get through that damn wall.”
“I will practice,” El said. “I can do it.”
“But it seems like you can’t,” Mike responded. Will’s eyebrows flew up and so did Nancy’s. “I’m not saying that you aren’t capable, El. But it seems like he’s keeping you out for a reason. That’s why you can’t get through the wall. That’s why you can’t find him, even in the void.”
El scowled at Mike, thunderous. “He will not hide forever.”
Dustin appraised Kali. “Do you think that you could find him? Like in the void?”
Kali shook her head. She had contributed very little to the conversation. But Will didn’t think she was the strong and silent type like Eleven. There was something harder, more vicious about her. “I do not have the powers that Jane has.”
“Shit,” Steve cursed.
“I wish we had another kid laying around,” Dustin said. He pushed his matted curls back and out of his eyes. Will wanted to grab him by the shoulders and march him into the shower. “That way we could draw him out.”
“We already did that,” Jonathan said softly. “Remember?”
Erica sighed. “I can’t believe you guys let him take Dipshit Derek.”
“Delightful Derek,” Robin and Will chorused.
Joyce rolled her eyes fondly. “Okay, you two.”
El didn’t appear to be in the mood for levity. She was still glaring holes into the floor.
“Do you think that’s why you can’t see Max?” Lucas hedged. All at once, everyone turned to stare at him in askance. “Because she’s where all the other kids are?”
Mike was perking up. “Which means that if we were able to break through it–”
“--We might be able to get Max back,” Lucas continued.
Will could see the pressure settle on El’s shoulders. “But I do not know how. Mike was right. Henry is not letting my mind into the Upside Down.”
Some minds do not belong in this world.
They belong in mine.
“What if I could get in?” Will asked. He looked at El, wide eyed. “Vecna practically confirmed it. He told me that my mind doesn’t belong in this world. That I don’t. But he said that I belong in his.” He was gaining steam, talking quicker and louder before anyone could tell him no. “My powers aren’t my own, so the kryptonite probably won’t work on me. And if I’m right and my powers are stronger when I’m connected to the hive mind, then I should be able to theoretically control the Upside Down. And I could open the wall.”
El got to her feet. “But what if he takes control… while you are in there?”
“She’s right,” Hopper said. He was looking at Will like he’d never seen him before. “You’ll be closer to the hive mind, but you’ll also be closer to him.”
“But I could help,” Will argued. He turned to Nancy. “This is the best idea we’ve got.”
Mike and Joyce exchanged a look.
“Baby–” Joyce started.
“It would solve our Demo problem,” Dustin said. He was fiddling with his hat as he spoke, like he needed something to do with his hands. “If Will was that powerful just by being close to the gate, then imagine how much more he could actually do inside it.” He seemed to be speaking directly to the original Party members now. “Do you guys remember Dart? And I told you that he saved me and Steve at the end, right? In the tunnels? I’ve been thinking and what if Vecna is making the Demo’s do his work? Obviously they’re still monsters, but I don’t think they necessarily want to be doing what they’re doing.”
Lucas was nodding along. “So if we could break them free from One’s control…”
“They could listen to Will instead,” Mike concluded. His eyes were sparkling as he looked over at Will. “You could turn the whole environment against him.”
Dustin was jumping up and down. “Like the vines!”
Hopper cleared his throat.
“And do you know how to do any of this?” Steve questioned.
“I mean, not exactly,” Will allowed. His palms were clammy. With excitement or horror, he didn’t know. Maybe an ungodly mixture of both. “But I didn’t know how to do what I did last night, either. Not until I did it.”
Robin was smirking.
“That still doesn’t answer Jane’s question,” Hopper said lowly. He was gazing at Joyce, like he knew how badly this was affecting her. “What if One tries to take control over you? He did enough damage when you didn’t share powers. If he were to turn you against us… against El.”
Nancy was beginning to smile. “Then we’ll blast him with his kryptonite.”
“I don’t know–” Joyce said.
“It’s risky,” Robin said. “But so is sending El down there again. At least Will could give us a fighting chance.” She brushed her pinky finger against his and he hooked them around each other. “I don’t think One knows about this power transference. So Will would be like our secret weapon. Our trojan horse, if you will.”
Steve looked confused. “He’s our what?”
Jonathan pinched the bridge of his nose.
A squeak of a marker and Nancy had written down Will’s name on the board smack dab in the middle of the Upside Down. It was official. He was going back.
Hopper’s jaw clenched.
But no one disagreed.
“Now,” Nancy said. “Who is going down there with them?”
The unspoken: and who is staying up here?
“It’s already been decided,” Hopper said. Apparently this was a hill he was willing to die on. “No one else has military training. I know how to drive the vans. I can get in and out.”
Steve side eyed Hopper. “And I’ll go with.”
Nancy hid her smile, burying it in her shoulder. “I think that’s a good plan. From what Dustin tells me, Steve took on a Russian guard a few summers ago. Plus he’s actually seen Vecna before, Hop. You haven’t.”
Hopper groaned and pointed a finger at Steve. “Fine. But no funny business, got it. If I say jump, I want to hear you say how high. And your feet better not touch the damn floor until I’ve said so.”
Steve saluted him.
“I’ll go with El,” Nancy stated. She added more names to the board. “Someone’s got to get the kids in and out. And Holly knows me. She’ll trust me.”
El dipped her head. Her fingers twitched in Kali’s grasp.
“Joyce, Jonathan, Murray, Erica, and Robin will stay up here,” Nancy said matter of factly. “If the kids are in the condition that Will was in when he came out, then we need to be prepared. Joyce and Jonathan know what to do. Plus if there’s any chance of Henry jumping ship and using one of the kids, then they already know the signs.” She uncapped a red marker and wrote the BYERS in big, blocky letters. “We’ll position them around a gate. We won’t have much time to pull this off, so it’ll have to be quick.”
“And us?” Erica asked.
“I want you in the hospital,” Nancy said. “Blasting Kate Bush as loud as you can.”
Robin’s lips twisted. “That’s it?”
Will bumped his shoulder against hers. “If Henry catches wind of what we’re doing, he’ll send the Demos to the hospital. He won’t want to let Max go.”
“You’ll be there to stop him,” Steve told her, winking.
“And what, oh fearless leader, is my job?” Murray inquired. Honest to God, Will hadn’t realized he had woken up and entered the room with them. His pulse pounded away. “Babysitting perhaps?”
“Do what you do best,” Nancy said.
Murray raised a single eyebrow.
Nancy’s grin was sharklike. “I want the government to pay for what they’ve done. I want you to stir up trouble with Hawkins. If we can manage to pull as many personnel away from the Upside Down and the gate, the better.”
“Oh hell yes,” Murray said.
“And us?” Mike asked.
Will watched as Nancy wrote Mike, Dustin, and Lucas’s names down right next to his. She labeled their group as the CORE FOUR. “Isn’t it obvious? You’ll be with Will.”
The boys turned to look at him.
“Upside Down 2.0?” Dustin suggested.
Will tipped his head to the side. “Sure, let’s do this thing.”
***
Max was faded. Her once vibrant hair was now falling around her face in greasy, lifeless clumps. Her skin was ashy and pale. Even the bags under her eyes were grey. Everything about Max that had once been bursting with life and energy and color was now dull. Will stood in the doorway, watching as Lucas bent his head over their joint hands.
El was standing on her other side, brushing her bangs back. She had a green scrunchy wrapped around her wrist and after a second, she took it off and put it on Max.
Mike and Dustin were standing next to him. Hesitant.
Not that Will didn’t love Max. He didn’t know her very well, but he loved her all the same. She made him laugh and put the boys in their place and was always so ready to fight to protect the people she cared about. She was brave and smart and looking at her in this goddamn hospital bed made Will physically ill. Nauseous.
“This is going to work,” Dustin said.
Mike nodded. “I know. Because it has to.”
Will felt Mike’s gaze land on the side of his face. Selfishly, Will wanted to demand another pep talk from him and Robin. He had felt so sure of himself for a moment there. But now, seeing what was truly at stake made his throat tighten. It wasn’t explicitly stated, but Will knew that everyone was counting on him. All their plans revolved around him being able to take control.
To fight back.
Will pushed aside his nerves and smiled softly at Mike. “It will.”
Time passed by slowly in the bare hospital room. The silence was thick and heady. Lucas was content to just sit by Max and hold her hand, rubbing a thumb over her knuckles. El had lasted about twenty minutes before she couldn’t take it anymore and hurried away, muttering something about training with Kali under her breath.
Originally Hopper had wanted Will to train with Eli and Kali, but Will’s powers didn’t manifest themselves in a trainable, malleable way. He didn’t have telekinesis. Unless he counted whatever the fuck he had done to the Demos. He still was unsure how everything worked.
Dustin had been mildly disappointed to discover that Will wasn’t able to levitate pens or blast people through walls. He’d made Will try on at least three separate occasions until Mike had finally had enough and shouted: “Was saving mine, Lucas’s, and Robin’s lives not enough for you, Dustin?”
The training sessions ceased afterwards.
Will hated to admit it, but he was a tad disheartened as well. A small part of him wanted to be like El. Sometimes Will wondered if he meant the powers or being a girl.
All the confidence Robin had inspired in him had already circled the drain and emptied into Hawkins sewer system. Being different was a lot less freeing and a lot more earth shatteringly terrifying. It’s not that he was unhappy with how it all ended up. Will finally had a shot to prove himself. To show everyone that he was worth fighting for. Worth all this mess that they’d found themselves in.
Worth all the bloodshed and the death.
Even if he really wasn’t.
Because he really wasn’t.
By the time Will moved from his chair, his legs were cramped and his back was numb. How could Lucas stand to do this everyday? Will pictured himself stuck in a small, soundless room with white walls and wanted to tear his hair out.
He gazed down at Max. He would never mention it to his friends, but he hoped that when Max woke up that she didn’t regret it. The doctors had said it would be nothing short of a miracle if she ever walked again. And she’d certainly never be able to see.
Privately, Will thought it’d be like exchanging one prison for another.
What was better?
Both options were lonely.
“Heading out?” Lucas whispered.
Mike and Dustin had left about an hour ago. Mike citing that he needed to talk to El. While Dustin simply patted Max on the head and vanished.
“Yeah,” Will whispered back. Throat thick. “Are you going to be okay?”
Lucas waved him away. “I’ll see you tonight, Byers.”
Walking outside of the room and into the hallway was like a breath of fresh air. Potentially spore infested. But fresh air nonetheless. Nurses passed Will, talking amongst themselves with their heads tucked down to scribble on clipboards. He wondered for a second what the rest of Hawkins thought about the circumstances they were in.
It was as he was making his way to the bathroom that he heard a familiar voice. Immediately, he backtracked, hovering right outside a cracked door. He got the strangest sense of deja vu when he peeked in to see Robin and Vickie.
Vickie’s mascara was lumped together on her bottom lashes.
“I’m sorry,” Robin said. She reached out and grabbed ahold of Vickie’s hands. There was a panicked, almost desperate look on her face. An air of urgency. “Really, I am. I swear I was going to take you to Enzo’s and it was going to be the best date in Hawkins history. I just–”
Vickie cut her off. “You just? You just, what? Robin? Huh? Had a better option come along?”
“No!”
“Jesus,” Vickie chuckled. She wiped underneath her eyes. “I bet it involved Nancy, didn’t it?”
Robin peeled back. A flicker of shock. “What does Nancy have to do with it?”
Vickie shook her head. Her candy striper uniform was rumpled and creased, like she’d been tugging at it nonstop. “If you don’t know, I’m not going to tell you.”
“Vickie!” Robin complained.
Will frowned. It sorta sounded like Vickie was implying that Robin had a crush on Nancy.
The two went back and forth some more, Vickie coming up with the worst possible outcomes as to why Robin missed their date. For a third time this month. While Robin stuttered and stammered. All the times that Robin missed made perfect sense to Will. They were all Upside Down related. But to an outsider like Vickie, it probably just seemed like a bunch of poorly made excuses.
“Look, clearly there’s something going on,” Vickie finally said. Her voice was harsh. “I’m not at the top of your priority list and I don’t even know if I want to be! But I can’t keep doing this, Robin. I deserve better than half assed dinner plans and being stood up.” She didn’t let Robin defend herself. “God, I wasn’t sure if it was going to be worth it. Being with you. Risking being found out. Shunned. This isn’t my only option, Robin. I like both. I don’t have to be stuck on the sidelines, waiting around for you. Hiding my life from my family. I can be with a man. I can be normal.”
Robin’s eyes filled with tears. “Normal?”
Vickie raised her chin. “If you’re looking for a practice girlfriend, you can find her somewhere else. Preferably in a less homophobic state.” She snorted. “If you can even manage to pay attention to one, of course.”
Vickie went to leave and Robin snagged her by the sleeve.
“Wait, just–”
“No,” Vickie snapped. “I’m done doing this with you. This pointless, maddening squabbling.”
Robin’s lips were quivering. “I’m sorry. I wish I could… I wish I could explain. I’m crazy about you, you know? Certifiably. I think about you all the time. And I really wanted to meet you at Enzo’s last night–”
“Then why didn’t you?” Vickie yelled. “Why weren’t you there?”
Nothing.
Will watched as Robin played out a thousand excuses in her mind. Obviously coming to the conclusion that none of them would make Vickie understand. None of them would make her forgive Robin.
Robin closed her eyes. “I wanted to be with you so bad.”
“Well, so did I,” Vickie spat. Her hands were shaking down at her sides. Will imagined kicking down the door and telling her. It’s all my fault. Not Robin’s. This is all me. “I guess us queers don’t always get what we want, right?”
Robin flinched.
At the door, Vickie paused. She stared at her reflection in the mirror next to the sink. Stop this, Will chanted, don’t make this mistake. Visibly steeling herself, Vickie raised her head defiantly. “It’s probably for the best anyways. It’s not like this,” she gestured between them, “could’ve gone anywhere. We can’t date in public. We can’t kiss. We can’t even hold hands. Some things just aren’t meant to be. Some things just aren’t worth the effort.”
With that, Will scrambled back as Vickie threw the heavy oak door open and blew past him. Seconds later, Robin exited as well. When she noticed him, her eyes grew heavy. But she didn’t say anything to him. Just put her head down and trailed down the hallway.
Will knew they were both hearing the same sentence on repeat in their heads.
I guess us queers don’t always get what we want, right?
***
Robin refused to even look in his direction that night before he and Mike left WSQK. Steve was practically surgically attached to her side, warding off anyone who might come close. The usual morbidly uplifting positivity that radiated from Robin was nowhere in sight and he could tell that it was making the Party uncomfortable. More uncomfortable than they already were, that is.
Will just wanted to scream and never stop. Up until he’d witnessed Robin and Vickie in the hospital, he’d always assumed that he was alone. Completely and utterly other. Different. Unnatural. Sick. You name it and he was it. Recalling the hope and the genuine flutter that kickstarted his heart back to life when he saw them together was not dissimilar to getting stabbed with a hot firepoker.
It burned and it burned and then when it stopped, it scarred. Leaving him forever changed.
God, he’d even started to believe that Mike could actually want him back. That maybe what he’d said all those years ago still held true. That they would go crazy together.
These days it was just him.
Will Byers left out in the cold.
Mike’s voice sliced in between his rambling, self-pitying monologue like a butter knife.
“You’re quiet,” Mike said. “Not having second thoughts, are you?”
Will looked to his right, studying Mike in the moonlight. It had still been light out when they’d left for Lovers Lake. Warm enough that Will had kept his jacket tied around his waist. Now it was dark out, so dark that Will had to squint to make out Mike’s facial features. His hair blended in with the world around them. Regardless of his sudden invisibility, Mike was a steadying presence next to him. Every so often Will let their hands brush.
It didn’t stop him from the immense guilt and disgust that overloaded his system after. But it felt reassuring. And it was warm, Mike was always warm. A human space heater. A tiny, personal sun that left Will sunburned and blinded.
Their hands bumped again. Mike’s fault this time.
Soon the sunburn was going to turn into skin cancer.
“No,” Will said. The woods around them were illuminated by the dim light from their flashlights. Every so often Will would jump at a random, gnarled tree and then laugh at himself for his twitchiness. “Just… ready for all of this to be over.”
That’s part of why they were out there. Hopper had wanted to dot all their i’s and cross all their t’s when it came to possible entrances and exits to the Upside Down. Joyce had drawn sticks to see who would partner up with each other. The fact that Will had ended up with Mike at Lovers Lake was simply a cruel act by a merciless God.
November in Hawkins was beautiful. Cold, with frost spread out over the grass, forming picturesque little images. The lake itself was beginning to freeze, reflecting the minimal stars in the sky. The water was pitch black, so black that if Will didn’t know up from down and left from right, he’d mistake it for the sky. The sky for the ground. The trees that hung over the water still had leaves and whenever the wind blew, it rattled them. It smelled different out by the lake compared to the rest of the town. Like childhood. Autumn leaves. Sap. The type of plants that grew and blossomed closer to the water.
Will edged closer to the lake. “Where did Dustin say the gate was?”
Mike had pulled a map from his pocket and was holding his flashlight up to it with his left hand. He was squinting, a frown tugging at his mouth, causing the corners to droop slightly. “It should be towards the Eastside of the lake. Assuming that’s what his little squiggly lines meant.”
Will peered at the map, scrunching his nose. “How hard is it to just draw a big ass circle labeled gate?” This close, he could feel the heat radiating off Mike. Smell the strawberry shampoo that Mike stole from Nancy but swore was accidental. He cleared his throat and backed away. “After all this is over I’m going to have to hold art classes in the off chance that another supernatural entity tries to take over the world.”
Mike snorted, shoving the map back in his pocket. “I just got this image of Dustin being possessed and drawing all over Mrs. Henderson’s walls.”
Will rolled his eyes.
In the end, they didn’t end up needing Dustin’s shoddily made map. The hair on the back of Will’s neck was rising before they ever came close. He was morbidly thankful for it. The thought of piling on a boat and sitting over the still water made him strangely light headed. Who knows what other types of monsters hid underneath the murky surface.
He squeezed the nape of his neck and let out a breath, watching as it became visible in the night air. “It’s definitely still there,” he said. Mike nodded, bumping their shoulders together. “I wish we could tell how big it was.”
“Or how small,” Mike pointed out. “We need to be able to get out through that thing if, God forbid, something goes wrong.” He smiled to himself, glancing down at his hands. “Knowing us, that'll be more than likely to happen.”
Will sat down by the shore, ignoring the cold biting into the backs of his thighs. His jeans were threadbare and looser than they ought to be on the account that he was borrowing Mike’s for the time being. All his clothes were left in California along with his safety and his sanity and his only goddamn shot at normalcy. Not that he’d ever truly achieved any of those things. Not that he ever would. Even when he wasn’t being targeted by a psycho mind serial killer with a number for a name and vines for a face, Will was still something so wholly and uniquely other from the rest of the world. From his friends.
He rubbed anxiously at his ring finger.
Mike dropped down next to him, as if sensing the direction his spiraling thoughts had taken and was determined to put a stop to them. He sat closer than was strictly necessary, if anyone had ever bothered to ask Will. He always did.
“I’m sorry about your birthday,” Mike said, completely out of the blue. “I can’t believe I just forgot. And I really can’t believe that you didn’t tell me.” He wiped at his eyes, inconspicuously. Will’s heart melted, defrosting from it’s earlier icy state. The ice shards formed icicles and dripped from his ribcage and into his bloodstream. Warming his cheeks. “Why didn’t you? Say anything?”
Will fumbled with his words for a moment, unsure. “I guess I thought there were bigger things to be worried about other than everyone missing my fifteenth birthday.”
That statement visibly settled over Mike’s face. “Like what?”
“Like El,” Will said, shrugging. His stomach clenched, hard. “Like Angela. Like Murray showing up from nowhere. Like my mom taking off to Alaska of all places.”
Mike swallowed noisily. “Did you notice how I wasn’t mentioned on your grand list of things that were more important than your birthday. I didn’t try to murder my classmate at the roller rink. I wasn’t taking off to another country. I was right there.”
Were you, though? Will thought bitterly.
“Yeah,” Will mumbled.
“I missed you like hell,” Mike blurted. His eyes were wide like the comment had burst from him, climbing up his throat like it had escaped out from under lock and key. “All I could talk about for a week was how excited I was to see you. I was going to be able to spend your birthday with you, just like we always do. It made me feel like I was still able to be your best friend, even from all the way back in Hawkins, Indiana.”
Will’s breath caught. “You wanted to celebrate it with me?”
Lips twisting, Mike smiled sardonically. “Yeah, some best friend I turned out to be, huh?”
Tears sprung to Will’s eyes and he brushed them away, digging his knuckles into his eye sockets in reprimand. He hadn’t cried over his missed birthday when it happened. He certainly wasn’t going to do it now. Years later.
“It doesn’t really matter,” Will said, having found his voice again. “In the grand scheme of things, how great are fifteenth birthday’s really supposed to be anyways? Maybe Henry did me some kind of favor. Jonathan always said that misfortune builds character.”
Mike was silent for a heart stopping moment. “I hate it when you call him that.”
“Jonathan?” Will joked, already knowing what he meant, who he meant.
“Will,” Mike implored.
Shifting, Will angled his body away so Mike could only see his side profile. Better not to let him see his whole expression. God knows what Will would do to his face during this conversation. What he’d give away.
“El does it sometimes, too,” Mike added. He sounded angry about it. “But she usually sticks to calling him One. It’s good for her, I think. Gives her some degree of separation from it. Plausible deniability.” Mike also shifted, moving so he was staring at Will instead of sitting side by side with him. Shit. Bad time for Mike Wheeler to pop his self-inflicted little bubble of obliviousness. “When you do it, it’s like… different. With El, it’s like she’s sad about what happened to him. Or like she’s so mad that she can’t stand it. With you… I don’t know, I guess it sounds almost familiar. Like you’re old friends.”
“We sorta are,” Will chuckled. “It’s different for El, Mike, because he’s never been inside… her head. He knows me, Mike. In ways that not even my mom does. Not even my brother.”
“Not even me?”
They stared at each other for a lengthy stretch of time.
“Yeah,” Will replied, shakily. “Not even you.”
Mike scoffed. He was oscillating from anger to hurt to something else. Something darker and unnamed. It looked a lot like when Will would bring up Robin in a conversation. Or when Will would talk to Jennifer Hayes after art class.
“That’s fucking fantastic,” Mike grumbled. “The monster from the blue lagoon knows my best friend even better than I do.” He folded his arms.
Will sighed, fond despite himself. “What are you saying? You wanna take a spin in my head too? See all my nightmares and feel what I feel? It’s not that interesting, Mike.”
“Well what if I do?” Mike demanded. He leaned forward, pushing past the outskirts of Will’s personal space. “It seems fair, doesn’t it? If he gets to, why don’t I?”
Will blinked at him.
Jesus that was–not a normal way to treat your best friend, right? Your male, totally, one hundred percent platonic best bud? Your kindergarten swing partner?
“I don’t think Henry was doing it to see my opinion on drizzling maple syrup over eggs, Michael.”
Mike didn’t laugh. He just looked at him, searchingly.
“I still miss you, you know,” Mike said conversationally.
Will’s throat was tight. Like someone had wrapped a fist around it from the inside. “I literally live with you, dude. You can’t tell me that you aren’t a bit sick of me yet.”
“Are you sick of me?” Mike pried. A flicker of genuine devastation flashed across his face. Rippling down his neck and stiffening his shoulders. “Will?”
Closing his eyes, Will tipped his head down, hiding the flushed apples of his cheeks. Never, he wanted to say, God, I could never be sick of you. Will thought about him all the time. What he was doing. Who he was with. If he’d eaten breakfast and what it had been. Will felt like the earth, orbiting around an unforgiving sun. Always near but never close enough. The center of gravity was never weak enough to let them collide.
Will tipped his head back, letting his feelings eat away at a gooey, aching hole in his chest. The forsaken place right under his breastbone. It was so big that Will was shocked that people didn’t stop him in the streets and exclaim: “good God, what is that? What is wrong with you?” He pictured it happening sometimes when he was lying in the Wheeler’s basement at night. “Who did that to you?” He wanted them to ask. But he knew that it was so, so, awfully obvious. Will’s spine was all that was left, keeping his body upright and together. But all the organs were perforated by words and actions and false hopes.
It’s not my fault you don’t like girls, and all that entailed, was shrapnel in his lungs. My life started the day I found you in the woods, was a knife embedded in his liver. The lack of a letter compared to his sister’s overflowing mailbox was a splinter in his pancreas. Mike refusing to hug him, to even touch him, at the airport was a gunshot wound to his kidneys.
There were stitches covering Will’s body in the formation of an autopsy scar. Lettering that spelled out: It was the best thing I’d ever done. And: If we go crazy, we’ll go crazy together. And the newest addition: You’re a sorcerer.
Will was so poorly made that his body was turning against him, dying. And one day a harmless word from his best friend was going to act like a punch in the gut where the hole in him started and he was going to choke on his own lifeblood.
Painstakingly, Will pulled the sides of the pit in his soul closed. Shutting himself off.
It felt like all his organs were shutting down.
Giving up.
“No,” Will whispered. He stood up, though. Hoping that Mike would follow. Follow him to the ends of the earth. Like he tried to follow him into the Upside Down when he was twelve. Like he was trying his hardest to do, climbing over the barriers and the blockades to get into the impenetrable fortress that was Will’s mind. A mind that didn’t even belong to him anymore. He was marked. Stained by his connection to Vecna and his goddamn love and loyalty for Mike.
It was a losing battle on both fronts. A monster in his mind and a kind hearted, gentle, and sweet boy, raging war on his nervous system.
Will wanted to take it all back. Heal the hurt. Close his mind so tightly that no one could ever see inside him again. Block off his friends and family. No one could ever know the real Will Byers and so help him, they never would.
He wanted his life back.
Wanted it more than he’d wanted to go home. More than he’d wanted a monster out of his head. More than he’d wanted to be warm. More than he’d wanted his friends to notice him. More than he’d wanted Mike, the love of his entirely selfish, terrible, life.
Please, Will thought. Don’t follow me, Mike. Stay away, stay away, stayawaystayawaystayawaystayawaystayawaystayaway. Don’t come close. One day Will worried that Mike was going to stick his whole hand in Will’s gaping jaws and he was going to lose it.
“Are you going to be okay tomorrow?” Mike inquired. He had also stood. Go figure. There was a new fragileness to him that Will hadn’t spotted before. Like a hole was being created in him as well. “Back there?”
Better there than here, Will thought. Then he regretted it.
“Of course,” he said, not meaning it. Lying, just like he always did. He didn’t know what he was even talking about when he said, “it doesn’t even bother me.”
Mike, noting Will’s defenses popping back up around them, retreated as well. Closing off. All the signals in the world wouldn’t have given Will what he really, truly wanted. “At least we’ll be there with you, right?”
Goosebumps covered Will’s arms and legs.
He smiled, brittle and fake. “Yeah, at least I have you guys.”
A part in the back of his mind replayed all the sneers and jeers that had been tossed his way after he’d gone missing. How he’d probably been taken by some other fucking queer. How he was so disgusting that no one would ever touch him other than the man who’d taken him. How his first thought when he’d opened his eyes to see a place that looked like home but wasn’t, was that he’d finally gone to Hell.
Will had always been told that he was going to drag Mike down with him.
***
Will was sitting at a feast. With a gorgeous oak table covered with turkey and mashed potatoes and salad and the juiciest, most vibrant fruit he’d ever seen. There were empty chairs lining the table with one standing at the top, a host's place. Mouth watering, Will reached out to bite into the pomegranate.
“Will?” Someone called.
The juice ran down his wrist. Coating his arm in red, dark and thick like blood.
“Will!” Someone called again.
He turned, floaty and content. For once he felt normal. Full and safe and happy. For nothing could get to him here. He was special and smart and so brave.
He remembered someone referring to him as beautiful, stroking his face lovingly.
He hadn’t felt so free in his life. Not since before the Upside Down. Maybe even before then.
He turned slowly, blinking sluggishly.
A girl with pigtails was standing next to him, tugging at his shirt nervously. Her face reminded him of pain and rejection and so much suffering. Holly Wheeler opened her mouth to speak to him and another voice came out, interrupting.
“Will,” it said. So soft. “I’m so glad you’ve joined us. I see you liked the pomegranates.”
***
Distantly the tones of Kate Bush began to kick in.
***