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Gjon counted himself lucky that he won the jury vote, although Måneskin won the televote and overall contest, Gjon was happy that he left with winning something, because he hasn't exactly won anything in his singing career up until this point.
Unfortunately, his friends Jendrik and Blas were not so lucky, and when it rains, it pours, because both Jendrik and Blas, alongside Jeangu Macrooy and James Newman all got a whopping 0 points from both the televotes and juries, which made for an unforgettable and rare moment, since it has never happened before.
What a horrible way to start the voting process, his heart ached for them. He promised himself that he was going to give each and every one of them a hug even though neither of them looked upset and just accepted their fate, it was some great sportsmanship but Gjon knew that they were disappointed in one way or another and just needed to mask the pain in front of the cameras.
__
Gjon arranged a meeting with the four of them in his hotel room as he gave them all of a well deserved hug as both Jendrik and James were still tipsy – and so was Gjon for that matter – from the celebrations. He did not know what time it was, and he didn't care.
As they all talked, the conversation shifted to their Eurovision "successes" as Gjon was still confused on why Jendrik, James, Jeangu and Blas seemed competent on their 0 points.
"Aren't you guys annoyed, just a little?" Gjon asked, sitting on his bed as the rest of the group were spread across the room, with Jeangu quietly helping himself to some of the drinks in the mini fridge. Gjon wasn't going to drink those anyway, so he wasn't going to bitch to Jeangu about it.
Jendrik chortled, "We get free alcohol, so that's a bonus!"
The blond haired smiley German was always happy-go-lucky and he had a penchant for alcohol – but consumed rarely – like Gjon, so the two got on well. Two drunk golden retrievers was a funny sight to behold, and according to his bandmates – from his band, Gjon's Tears and the Weeping Willows – Gjon got into some right shenanigans after he had a bit too much.
"I suppose that is a bonus?" Gjon murmured, as he knew once the high feelings of alcohol wore off, it was one dreary and depressing thought after another, well that always happened to him, but it might not happen to Jendrik.
Blas, who has been quiet so far, smacked his lips and admitted, "As much as I'm having a blast with Eurovision, 0 points is just...painful" Slightly trailing off as he sat cross-legged on the floor.
Finally, some honesty.
He saw the rest – even Jendrik – nod in agreement. All the alcohol in the world couldn't make up for the mental anguish that was 0 points.
Jendrik bounced onto Gjon's bed and sat a bit too close to him as he chirpily swung his arms around Gjon – a bit too roughly – and beamed, "At least we have the jury winner with us!"
"T-thanks." Gjon awkwardly smiled as Jeangu, who has finally stopped rummaging through the mini fridge, piped up, "He'll make us better!"
The best he could provide was cheap alcohol, compliments and hugs, he wasn't sure if he could cheer up four tipsy nil point-ers while being tipsy himself.
But he sure loved their optimism about Gjon being able to cheer them up.
"I will?!" Gjon rhetorically asked, his eyes wide as the others nodded.
Jendrik, who had sensed that Gjon was stuck in a rock and a hard place about how to cheer people up, suggested, "I propose ambushing the most successful ones with water guns!" He then quickly added, "But we're not gonna ambush you!"
Gjon blinked and the German, "How drunk are you?"
He pouted, trying to convince Gjon by quivering his bottom lip, "...I just want fun, besides I'm sure they'll like it."
James then piped up, his Yorkshire accent strong and sharp, which almost made Gjon jump out of his skin, "...except for the Ukrainian girl. She might kill us."
Did he mean Kateryna Pavlenko? Sure she looked scary but she was an absolute darling to Gjon and the both of them made quite the positive duo.
Jeangu, who had continued endlessly rummaging in the fridge, defended Kateryna and told James, "Gjon and Katya are friends, I'm sure she'll like it!"
...no she won't.
He wasn't even going to go there. Kateryna won't like it, full stop.
Gjon wasn't frightened of her, to say...
...well maybe a bit.
As much of a darling Kateryna was, she definitely looked like someone you didn't want to cross, even if it was for a harmless prank because some people didn't like pranks much, and he didn't know Kateryna's position on them. Something in his gut told him that Kateryna just wouldn't like being sprayed by some drunken nil-pointers. (and Gjon)
"Yeah...I'm not testing my luck." Gjon muttered as Jendrik snickered with a dirty grin and playfully jabbed Gjon with his elbow, "Ooh, she's feisty!"
For fucks sake.
"Jendrik, shush." Gjon quietly scolded, rolling his eyes and giving him a look of annoyance.
"Sorry." He murmured under his breath.
"We can do the water gun thing, but only I can decide on who to do it on." Gjon explained, knowing well on who'll be in the "no water gun spray zone."
"Why? Is it because you're the jury winner?!" Jeangu exclaimed in slight jealousy, actually averting his gaze from the snacks and cheap alcohol from the mini fridge.
"No!" Gjon asserted, as he added, "It's because I'm friends with like 90% of the contestants."
"And what does THAT mean?" Blas asked with a slight undertone of snark.
"So I can form diplomatic relationships." Gjon cheekily smirked, as Jendrik burst into laughter, falling back on the bed.
This was going to be a fun night.
__
They planned, consumed alcohol and planned some more, but most importantly, they got absolutely hammered.
The group spent a solid hour trying to whittle down on who to select for their "ambush" and then split everyone up.
James "ambushed" Barbara – he probably wasn't going to do a good job.
Jendrik "ambushed" Daði – Gjon could just imagine him with his silly grin and a small water gun.
The rest – Blas, Jeangu and Gjon – were going to do a bigger challenge: soak Måneskin, the winners of the contests.
"And we can blame you if they get mad?" Blas asked.
Gjon, who was struggling to sit on his chair as this point, hiccupped in a drunken state, "Y-yeah, I don't f-fucking care at this point."
He then fell off the chair, thankfully he didn't hit his head on something hard, just some carpet.
Blas, Jeangu, James and Jendrik laughed, as Jendrik cheekily grinned, "I love you in your alcoholic era."
Idiot.
"Shut up." Gjon murmured, as he used his hands to climb back onto his chair, hopping he wouldn't fall off of it, again.
__
James Richard Newman, poised and ready with a water gun in hand and a devious smirk. He knew he was the oldest of the group, but he wanted to cause a bit of chaos.
His target was Barbara Pravi, who like Gjon, sung in French and lost to Måneskin, but still managed to come in the top three. Gjon and Barbara were on friendly terms with each other, unlike their respective fanbases. Barbara was ever so graceful in her loss, unlike the French delegation, whose salt could be spotted from across the globe.
Hiding in a blank spot behind a wall, Barbara was in his sights as he spotted her exit her hotel room in a swanky new dress.
He quickly sprayed her, as he hoped that Barbara had no caught him, but she had already had.
"James!" She gasped before marching up to him in an elegant strop.
"I have just gotten dressed and, I c-can't believe you!" Barbara stammered, shaking her head.
James then took off, snickering, "Sorry, not sorry."
He heard Barbara yell, perhaps shaking her fist in a comedic manner, "CASSEI-TOI!"
Oops.
Well, Gjon was going to have to deal with that.
__
As James ran whilst sniggering like a schoolchild, he bumped into Jendrik, as in quite literally bumped into him, completely knocking the German off his feet.
"Sorry Jendrik." He apologised, helping him up.
"No worries. It seems like you've pissed Barbs off." Jendrik playfully laughed.
He must've heard her anger.
"Have you done Daði yet?" James asked as Jendrik nonchalantly shrugged, "Yeah."
"How did he take it?" He enquired as Jendrik continued to be his relaxed and slightly tipsy self.
"Chillest guy ever, he just laughed it off. I thought he was going to kill me." Jendrik chuckled as James patted him on the back. Soaking a 6.9ft Icelandic giant was no easy feat.
"Damn, I wish I had him to drench." James murmured. As much as he liked Barbara, she definitely wasn't in a good mood with him right now.
Jendrik then clicked his tongue, continuing James' sentence although it didn't need any continuing, "-instead of a French!"
The fuck did he mean by that?!
"What?" James asked, confused.
"Combining your sentence and then mine, it rhymes." Jendrik explained as the cogs in James' brain began to turn.
It then clicked.
Damn, I wish I had him to drench, instead of a French. Clever.
"...impressive, I never made that connection!" James smirked, impressed at Jendrik's genius.
Jendrik wasn't fazed at his intelligence as he hurried James along, "C'mon, let's see how the rest are doing!"
__
Meanwhile, Blas, Gjon, Jeangu are also hiding in a blind spot near Måneskin's hotel room.
In a hushed tone, Blas whispered, "There's Damiano."
Gjon whispered back, slightly impatient, "What are you waiting for?!"
Without warning, Jeangu then sprayed Damiano, as he said quietly, a bit confused, "Were we supposed to go?!"
Gjon wasn't too sure himself, as he muttered, "Um..."
His attention was then shifted to Damiano proclaiming, as he looked around, confused, "Who the fuck is there?!"
Damiano then turned to Thomas, who Gjon had not yet spotted, and told him, "Thomas, someone just sprayed me..."
Thomas proceeded to laugh at Damiano misforty, "Holy shit, it's the phantom sprayer!" Was all he could add to the conversation as Damiano frowned at him and crossed him arms:
"You're not funny." The elder Italian said as Thomas playfully jabbed him with his elbow, "Yes I am."
Gjon then saw Jeangu spray Thomas, as the Surinamese-Dutchman hissed at his colleagues who were too cowardly to spray the attractive Italians, "Why are you guys not spraying?!"
"I'm a chicken." Blas whispered, before turning to Gjon, who froze up.
Chicken?!
Gjon loved chickens.
He adored animals, and was damn good at animal noises. Perhaps he should demonstrate them?!
"I can make chicken noises." Gjon feebly whispered as Jeangu looked at him with wide eyes:
"So you both chickened out?!" He quietly hissed, a bit annoyed at both Gjon and Blas.
Gjon then meekly said, "You wanna see me make a chicken noise?"
Jeangu's eyes widened as Gjon didn't know what he was doing wrong. Jeangu waved his arms in a panic and sharply hissed, again, "Holy shit, no, no, no."
"Oh..." Gjon trialled off.
Blas who had been quiet, then said, perhaps a bit too eagerly, There's Ethan!" He then proceeded to spray Ethan, who had just appeared into view.
As Ethan stood, confused, Gjon readied his water gun, but Jeangu stopped him, "Wait for Vic."
In almost comedic timing, the final member of Måneskin had turned up too see what all this fuss was about as Jeangu murmured under his breath, a bit amazed at the coincidence, "Oh there she is."
Without hesitation, Gjon sprayed Vic, who unlike Ethan and Thomas, didn't shrug it off. She was not as annoyed as Damiano, but instead, confused.
"Where the hell did all this water come from?" She questioned to the rest of her bandmates as Ethan sighed.
"Are you guys stupid?!" He facepalmed as Thomas frowned, "Ethan, I don't like being called stupid."
"Yeah, we're just drunk." Damiano added with a snort.
Ethan crossed him arms in a huff, "Fine! But it's so obvious that someone is spraying us!"
Oh shit, they've figure it out.
"But who is it?!" Vic asked as Ethan shot back, annoyed, "How should I know?!"
Trying to diffuse an incoming argument, Damiano explained, "We can just ask around to see who is the phantom sprayer?"
Thomas smirked, "There could be phantom sprayERS-" he put emphasis on the end of "sprayers" before continuing, "-instead of just one."
Damiano added, "Makes sense." As he and the rest of Måneskin went off to find the culprit – or culprits.
Now it was just Blas, Gjon and Jeangu alone as Blas whipped his head to Gjon, "Your fault."
Gjon stammered in disbelief, "...I...I...Jendrik started it!"
Jeangu then quickly said with a snicker, "Your fault."
Was he just piggybacking off of Blas?!
"I can't believe you guys!" Gjon exclaimed, his mouth agape as he rolled his eyes in annoyance.
Blas tried to diffuse the situation, similar to Damiano, as he told him, "Look, you organised it..."
Still bewildered at the audacity of Blas, he shot him a look, "You can't be serious?! I shouldn't take the blame for all of this!"
Jeangu then proceeded to get out a tape recorder as he snickered, "Blas said and I quote-" He then began to play the recording on Blas saying, "-and we can blame you if they get mad?"
...
He was beat, and he knew exactly what to do in such a situation.
"I'm going to bed, see you guys in the morning." Gjon causally said before walking off.
Jeangu sighed and muttered, "You absolute cock..."
Gjon whipped his head around and exclaimed, "What?!"
And so, Gjon, Jeangu and Blas proceeded to squabble like children as Gjon left the two of them too it and dashed off to his hotel room, leaving Jeangu and Blas alone.
A few moments after Gjon left, Jendrik and James managed to locate Blas and Jeangu.
"Where's Gjon?" Jendrik asked.
Blas shrugged, "He just fucked off."
James laughed, Should we just call Katya?"
The quartet shared looks at each other as Jendrik then whipped out his phone and began dialling, "On it."
__
Gjon woke up and did morning routine, bathroom, shower, hastily finding clothes and recovering from a hangover. Whatever did he do last night?
He heard a knock at the door and answered it, being faced with Kateryna – who had a face devoid of emotion as always – and Daði, who looked as chirpy as ever despite his height of 6.9ft being intimidating at first.
Gjon greeted the pair, "Good morning you guys."
Kateryna, still stone faced, crossed her arms and sharply said, "There's nothing good about it."
Oh crap.
Gjon felt his stomach clench as he muttered and tried to defend himself, "Fuck...it was Jendrik's fault, okay?! He started the entire thing."
He was pinning the blame on Jendrik because...he wanted to, okay?! He wanted to pin the blame on the someone for once!
Kateryna did not buy Gjon's excuse, as she glared at him, " Yeah, but you threw your friends under the bus."
Daði had his turn in the conversation, as he was just standing there, goofily smiling, "I mean, it seemed like a bit of tipsy fun-'
Kateryna interrupted him with a brisk, "Whose side are you on?!"
Did she wake up on the wrong side of the bed, because why was she so ratty this morning?!
Daði explained to her, "No-one's side, like you, and you wanted me for revenge."
...so that's what this was all about.
"WHAT?!" Gjon exclaimed in shock, his eyes wide as his Ukrainian friend chuckled to herself.
"See...harmless fun." She said under her breath.
Revenge wasn't exactly harmless fun, was it?
"Why do you care about this?!" Gjon asked, trying to process what Daði had just said about Kateryna's "revenge." Just how far was she going to take this?!
She flashed him a smile, "Because I just want a bit of fun as well."
Gjon started blankly at her, his mouth slightly agape as he stammered in confusion, "...w-what are you trying to say?"
Kateryna sighed, like Gjon was the one who didn't understand, "I wanted to be sprayed with the water guns as well."
So that's what this was about?! She could've just told him, but did she have a revenge kink or something?!
He pursed his lips and admitted, trying to give his reasoning, "I thought you would've killed me."
Kateryna glared into his eyes, still unimpressed as he playfully clicked her finger and cut to the chase, "Look, I just want Daði to tip you upside down and let this be done with."
That wasn't what Gjon originally thought Kateryna was going to do, but at least she wasn't taking it too far.
But then, Daði is 6.9ft...
...and Gjon is only 6.0ft.
It could be worse, because 6.0ft was taller than the average, but not tall-tall, but still, tall.
"Why?" Gjon blinked, bewildered at Kateryna's request.
She gave off a devious laugh, "Because I'm bored."
As lovely as she was, she was sure...interesting, at times.
Gjon tried to piece it all together,as he told her, "So you're on no-one's side and just wanted an excuse to tip me upside down?"
She nodded, "Yes."
Gjon sighed with his hands in his pockets as he directed his attention to the Icelandic gentle-giant, "Daði, just let this be done with and I can continue with the rest of my day."
With a cheeky snicker, Kateryna added, "Barbara also wanted you tipped upside down. She was upset when her dress was ruined."
Well it was James who did it, so he could be the one at Kateryna was after, but Gjon supposed that he deserved this "punishment" because he did stitch his friends up.
"It's just water-" Gjon casually began as he felt Daði grab him and tip him upside down.
First it was exhilarating, rush of blood to his head which he didn't want to think too deep about as he heard Daði chuckle.
"Hey, this is fun!"
Gjon then added, "Just don't shake me."
...and guess who shaked him?
Why the fuck did he have to say that?!
"Daði!" Gjon yelled, trying to get him to stop, but was thankful he hadn't eaten his breakfast yet or it'll just be instantly coming up right now.
Regardless, he still had that feeling in the pit of his stomach that he was going to be sick, as one does when they are tipped upside by a nearly seven foot Icelandic who was currently lightly shaking him.
And so, Gjon vomited all over the floor, now feeling like complete shit.
Kateryna's best course of action was to laugh, as she found this all humourous.
Daði was more sympathetic, as he set Gjon down and apologised, "Oh, my bad, sorry."
Gjon frowned, wiping his mouth and glaring at Kateryna before going back to his hotel room, "You're cleaning that up."