Actions

Work Header

How to pacify a ragebaiting bandit

Summary:

Both Boosfer and Wemmbu are exhausted after returning from the nether void. And despite Wemmbu saying that taking a nap in FlameFrags's base is probably a bad idea, Boosfer doesn't care.

Notes:

It's weird writing fanfiction that's this fluffy lmao. Most things I write are angst or comedy

Work Text:

"Let's never talk about this again." Wemmbu said as he and Boosfer exited the nether, exhausted from their ordeal beneath the nether bedrock.

"Wemmbu, you can't just leave me here!" Boosfer said. "I'm so tired. I haven't slept in days, I'll keel over on the spot!"

"Stop being overdramatic." Wemmbu drank an invis potion, turning himself back into the invis knight. "You'll be fine."

"You're so heartless." Boosfer crossed his arms and pouted.

"Let's just get out of here and go our separate ways." Wemmbu insisted.

"Why don't we go through my escape tunnel?" Boosfer asked. "After all, it's probably the fastest way to the surface."

"Are you stupid?" Wemmbu asked. "Flame will kill you the moment he sees you in his base."

"Naaah." Boosfer dismissed. "I can be sneaky when I try. And if I do get caught, I can charm my way out of any situation."

Wemmbu tried to give Boosfer a skeptical look, but he was invisible.

"Fine." Wemmbu said. "It's your death."

"Aw, you're so sweet!" Boosfer said, grinning.

"Shut up." Wemmbu said. "If you don't shut up I am going to drop you."


Soon later, they were at Flame's base. Both of them were soaking wet, since they'd used a water bucket to climb out of the tunnel. Wemmbu was surprised Flame didn't bother to block it off.

Boosfer shivered. "Why is it so cold? We're supposed to be in a mesa!"

"Because you're wet, that's why you're cold." Wemmbu said. "I don't see or hear anyone here. I'll go check outside." Wemmbu walked outside. He didn't see Flame anywhere, and the horse was missing from its usual spot, so he was probably out doing something.

Wemmbu went back inside Flame's base. "He's gone." He confirmed, walking into Boosfer's room. "Now we can leave." But when he looked at the bed, he saw Boosfer snuggled up in lime green sheets.

Boosfer yawned. "Oh boy, I am tired after that expedition. I need a nap."

"Bro, you are not going to take a nap in Flame's base." Wemmbu exclaimed. "If he comes in here, he'll kill you on the spot."

"But it's soooo cozy." Boosfer complained. "And my nearest base is like 500 blocks away."

"So?" Wemmbu said. "Just deal with it. It's not naptime."

"Come on Wemmbu, you can't act like you're not also tired. Surely you want to take a nap too. After that horrible adventure, I feel like I'm about to topple over!"

Boosfer was right, Wemmbu did feel quite tired. But there was a time and place for everything, and right now, Wemmbu needed to get somewhere safe before napping.

"Yeah. I am tired. But I'm not stupid. When he gets back, he'll literally kill you. You need to go somewhere else. And stop calling me by my name!"

"I'm staying here. This is my room."

Wemmbu looked down at Boosfer, not sure what to do. He hated to admit it, but in that time underneath the nether bedrock, he had come to care for Boosfer just a bit.

Wemmbu could tell from Boosfer's demeanor that he wasn't going to move from here for a while. And if Flame came back to his base and saw Boosfer here, Boosfer would surely end up saying something stupid and getting himself dropped.

But if Wemmbu was here, as the invis knight, then Flame would be slightly less annoyed. Wemmbu would be able to calm down Flame, while also keeping Boosfer from ragebaiting too much and getting himself killed.

He couldn't believe he was about to do this.

Wemmbu walked over to the bed. Sure, he could sleep in Flame's bed, but he got a feeling that would piss off Flame quite a lot. And it's not like Boosfer's bed was small; it was about as big as his ego.

Wemmbu slipped into bed next to Boosfer, and he could admit that the sheets were comfortable. Normally, he wouldn't have bothered with sleeping; he would've just patrolled outside. But he knew how much he desperately needed it.

"Bro, you are really gonna sleep with your armor on?" Boosfer questioned.

"I do that all the time." Wemmbu said. "And if I don't have my armor, you'll have no idea where I am because I'm invis."

"Yeah, but you won't be invis when you sleep." Boosfer pointed out. "Come on, just take it off. It's so much cozier without armor."

"I don't know if that's a good idea." Wemmbu said. "In fact, it sounds like a terrible idea."

"Come on, it's not like you need it. And besides, those trims are ugly. Netherite trims on diamond? You look like a rich person who doesn't have upgrade templates."

"Bro, my trims have plenty of aura!" Wemmbu said. "They are not ugly."

"Nah, I think you have L aura." Boosfer retorted. "And a dune trim? Really? You look like an invis mafia copycat who doesn't have an eye trim."

Wemmbu sighed. "If I take off my armor, will you stop insulting it?"

"Only if you hide them out of my sight."

"Okay." Wemmbu took off his armor and put them under the bed. "Happy?"

Boosfer smiled, indicating he was indeed happy. "Also, I don't actually hate your armor. It's just funny seeing your reaction."

"Why are you like this?" Wemmbu settled into the bed. He was still slightly cold, but the blankets helped.

"I dunno." Boosfer said, scooching closer to Wemmbu.

"Back off. Personal space, bro." Wemmbu said.

"Fiiiine." Boosfer whined, moving away from Wemmbu.

Wemmbu sunk into the warm covers, and he barely noticed his invis running out as he sunk into a blissful slumber.


When Wemmbu woke up later, he found himself to be freezing cold. All the blankets were being hogged by Boosfer, and the temperature in the room felt like it was freezing.

He'd once heard that while deserts and mesas were hot in the daytime, they got very cold at night. That explained why it was so cold.

Wemmbu tried to pull the blankets away from Boosfer, but even in his sleep, Boosfer held onto them tightly.

He knew he should wake up Boosfer, but Boosfer just looked so comfortable and happy. It felt wrong to wake him up, just to steal the blankets away from him and subject him to the cold.

But it was genuinely freezing in here, so even half the blankets probably wouldn't suffice to keep one of them warm. They only had two options: hog the blankets, or freeze.

Unless…

Wemmbu admitted that the idea was absurd. But he kinda felt bad for Boosfer, and it's not like it could do much harm.

Wemmbu swiftly stole the blankets from Boosfer, waking him up harshly.

"It's so cold in here." Boosfer complained. "Gimme back my blankets." He made grabby hands at the blankets.

"Just shut up, I'm here to help with that." Wemmbu said, still wrapping his head around the absurdity of what he was about to do.

Wemmbu grabbed Boosfer and pulled him into an embrace, then wrapped the blankets around them.

"Mhh… this is nice." Boosfer mumbled sleepily. He yawned loudly, and then nuzzled his head into Wemmbu's chest.

Wemmbu had to admit this was weird, even for Boosfer. But he could also admit this was comfortable. He was warm, and Boosfer was no longer hogging the blankets, so that was good.

It seemed that his plan to pacify Boosfer had worked. Who knew that cuddles were Boosfer's secret weakness?

"This is super nice." Boosfer said. "You should give me a massage. Massages are super nice. Ever tried getting a massage therapist? Really helps ease the stress."

"Stop making this weird." Wemmbu said. "I'm only doing this because it's freezing in here."

"Okay, anything for my bestie." Boosfer wrapped his arms around Wemmbu, getting as close to his as humanly possible.

"We're not besties." Wemmbu insisted. "Maybe associates. But not friends."

"You are such a meanie." Boosfer mumbled. "Now is sleepy time."


Wemmbu was awoken to the door of the base opening. Quickly, he tumbled out of bed and splashed himself with invis.

"I am never going to the nether again." Flame mumbled as he walked into his house.

Flame walked by Boosfer's room, and spotted Wemmbu while he was fumbling to put on his armor.

"What are you doing in here?" Flame asked.

Wemmbu applied the voice changer. "Bro, it's none of your business."

"Of course it's my business! You're in my house! Wait, is that Boosfer over there?"

"Oh yeah, that's me." Boosfer was now awake. "I was just taking a nap with W- uh, my invis bestie."

"Bro! Get out of my house!"

"But it's my room." Boosfer protested. "I have a right to be in my own room, don't I?"

"No. I already kicked you out of here, so leave."

"Sorry about that." Wemmbu said. "Come on, Boosfer. Let's just leave."

"Do we have to?" Boosfer complained. "This bed is really comfy, man. Why can't we all just live together and be roomies?"

"Yes. If you don't leave then I'm going to drop you. That applies to both of you." Flame glanced at Wemmbu.

"Let's just get out of here." Wemmbu said. "Come on, Boosfer. I can go back to being a guard in Capital City, and you can go back to…. whatever it is you do. Honestly, I don't even wanna know."

"Fine." Boosfer said. "But Flame, when you need help, I just know you'll come crawling back to me, because we're besties."

Flame splashed potions at his feet.

"Okay, okay, I'll shut up!" Boosfer exclaimed, walking out of the house.

"So, are you gonna leave, or…" Flame asked Wemmbu.

"Thanks for not killing Boosfer." Wemmbu said.

"I wanted to so badly." Flame said. "I swear, if he ever comes back here I actually will kill him. All he does is annoy me."

"He's not actually that bad when you get to know him." Wemmbu said. "I mean, he's bad… but I've gotten used to him."

Flame laughed. "Keep being delusional, bro."

"I will." Wemmbu said as he exited the base.