Chapter Text
Lucifer isn't even sure why he's at this bar.
He hates sinners. And its full of them. He could have gone to a different ring, then he would only see hellborns, but he wasn't in the mood to be treated as a big deal and crowded right now.
Right now all he wanted was to get shitfaced drunk and most sinners wouldn't know they were looking at the king of hell when they saw him because he's never out of his palace, that's something he can't have with hellborns because in the other rings despite never being out, his image is everywhere (sinners just dont give a fuck about him really unlike the hellborns who treat him like a celebrity)
And another thing he likes about going to sinner bars (despite hating them) is that being small and unknown means he can listen in on other people's conversations and they won't bat an eye at him.
So maybe he does actually know why hes at the bar. It's because he's a nosy bitch. And a depressed one.
But not as depressed as that guy--!
And by that guy, he means the guy with a box for a head. The box is actually what humans call a TV. They invented it at some point-- (Lucifer doesn't care enough to remember when right now) anyway the guy just got absolutely mentally destroyed.
Banxcent-- box? Bax--? Vinco? No no, none of those. Just TV Head will do for now. TV head, was shot down by his red pal (and by red GOD did he mean red, guys just wearing it head to toe, even his hair is red--! Like geez! Tone it down! Ever heard of color variation?!) after proposing a partnership, i mean just laughed at right in the face for a good solid 5 minutes. Then given a edgy rant about how friends in hell didn't exist.
Said red guy then proceeded to stand up and leave afterwards not sparing TV-head guy a glance.
Now TV-head was just staring into his drink gripping his lap looking like he was trying really hard not to cry.
Lucifer has never liked sinners. Its been said multiple times.
But even he feels a little bad watching this Tv-guy get laughed in the face when proposing a business deal between friends-- i mean that's just rough!
His daughter has always told him to empathize with sinners-- be a actual ruler. Make friends! So fine.. just this once, he'll say something nice to one.
He scoots a bit over in his wheely chair to be closer.
"Woow thats uh--" he hesitates trying to figure out what to say "rough buddy.. real rough"
The sinner's head shoots up to stare at Lucifer in disbelief as if shocked and insulted that he dare to speak "Are you mocking me?"
"Well no. If i was, trust me, you would know, I can be realll annoying when i want to be." Lucifer fumbled with his bow tie.
".. Leave me be. Can't you see i just had a real shitty night?" Wow this guy is just wallowing in self pity huh?
"Look Mr- tv for brains--" "It's Vox." "Okay- box--" "I said Vox--!" "Well yeah thats what i just said Box--" "Your fucking mocking me aren't you?! You can't seriously mess up my name that easily--!"
"Okay okay-- touchy touchy! Look i just wanted to say i'm sorry you just got friendship dumped-- and i'm in the same boat as you-- well not friendship wise-- you see my wife has--"
"I DON'T CARE--!" his voice gets all glitchy with frustration.
Fucking RUDE! Wow. He tries to be nice to a sinner for once and this is what he gets in return?!
"Wow! Okay man, fuck you! I was trying to be nice to you but clearly your a asshole who probably deserved to get friendship dumped!" Welp.. him and his big fat mouth. Now the sinner's probably gonna want to beat the fuck out of him and thanks to the restriction Lucifer can't do diddly squat about it.
At least that's what he expected.. but the guy just bursts into tears instead. He must be really drunk if he's crying.
See in hell-- with sinners anyway, crying is seen as weakness and you can't afford it at anytime, and here is this guy who was talking about taking over hell (really arrogant to say with the king of hell in the room btw (not that the sinner knew the king of hell was in the room but still) ) now crying in public.
Hoo boy.. what does Lucifer do now? This is really uncomfortable..
"I-- i know--! I know i'm a asshole-- but-- but i thought--" More glitching noises as the tv man struggled to even talk "I thought Al would-- would always still be there. That we could be assholes together--! My one friend-- we had something! I know we did- he cares! Right?!"
Lucifer pats the guys shoulder as he speaks up again "Yeahhh whatever you say Box.. Lets not draw too much attention over here.." Lucifer DOES NOT want to get kicked out of the bar before he can properly get drunk because he's associated with the guy loudly crying that's probably killing the mood for everyone else (unless they are sadists)
The guy falls silent at the touch.
He looks confused-- then it's like something clicked together for him.
For Vox.. this is the second person in hell to touch him in a non violent way. (The first was Alastor, and that was.. already ended now.)
"Who are you..?"
"Huh? I-- well--" Saying his name right now could go multiple ways.. he is too tired to deal with a whole crowd of people swarming him so he say's simply "Lu. My name's Lu."
"..."
Its silent for a long time as they awkwardly stare at each other and Lucifer has no fucking clue whats going on in the sinner's mind right now.
"Did.. you really think what happened was rough?" the sinner finally says.
"Well.. yeah i guess. It sucked and i'm sorry about saying you deserved it.. guy was probably everything to you." Anything to get this guy to stop sobbing so Lucifer can go back to drinking.
"...."
God this is so awkward.. what the hell is happening right now?
How is he in this situation right now?
"Luuu! Ahah--! Fuck man your not so bad--! your-- great actually--!" his screen his flushed as he laughs.
TV-man is slumped down with his arms around Lucifer's shoulders as Lucifer helps him walk home because he's drunk.
Why do they keep running into each other these past two weeks?! And why is Lucifer helping him home?! (because he doesn't want to suffer through another drunken rant about red guy AGAIN which is what the sinner does whenever they see each other)
"Your damn right i'm great.. I put up with your wasted ass.." Lucifer mutters under his breath.
They aren't friends. The TV sinner hasn't even asked Lucifer about himself. But then again, that also makes it easier to hide the fact he is king of hell.
"You know Lu.. your so much easier to talk to then Alastor--" he hiccuped. "Never-- never talk all smart with bigger words then needed to seem better then me-- or-- or always put me down--" Lucifer isn't sure where this is even going. He doesn't care so he tunes it out.
"Mhm yep.." Is all he says.
This guy.. a pain in the ass. He really should stop coming around this sinner bar.. no matter how good the drinks are..
And yet he never does. He still isn't ready to face the other sins and even a little word got out that he was in a bar in one of the other rings-- well-- the sins would show up fast.
So sinner bars it is. And Mr. Picture Box is currently in the routine of drinking away his sorrows about his red-headed obsession right now. So here he is again. Listening to him talk. He should have bitten his tongue that day instead of following his inner charlie voice.
"--and i saw him the other day-! And he didn't even glance my way---!" GOD when will he shut up about this guy?!
Just zone it out again Lucifer.. zone it out.
"But what about you?" huh? "You uh.. the first night we met.. you said that your in the same boat with your wife.. but i never-- well i never asked about it after i said i don't care. But i care now." Well.. wow! He can actually ask about other people! Hmm.. maybe he can make friends with a sinner after all--! Charlie will be so proud when he writes about this to her--!
"Oh well.. she.. we haven't been talking. And she left the palace.. i don't know where she went--"
"Left the palace..? You live in a palace?" FUCK... he's way too fucking drunk he should have said house or something--! He's gonna connect the dots--
"That's so fucking cool man" Or not..?
"But um-- sorry for interrupting.. you said she left?"
"Yeah.. she.. just-- stopped speaking to me. And took all her things and left. We've been drifting for a while but i thought- well i thought we would still be.." Lucifer feels a deep ache in his soul. Alone.. god he's really alone if he's even considering talking to a sinner about personal things.
The sinner's hands close around his shoulders-- a shiver goes up his spine- apparently personal space doesn't exist now.
"I'm so sorry Lu.. we really are.. both in the same boat huh?" Well he does NOT like how that was said. Especially the manic look in the guys eyes.
"Um.. yeah sure. Sure we are. A drink to that?"
"Yeah.. a drink to that."
Lucifer isn't sure when the shift happened.
The sinner lately had been asking more about HIM then talking about red guy.
"You like ducks?" he said in surprise after Lucifer had answered the question about favorite animal.
"Well yes-- i do."
"Huh.. i didn't expect that. I pegged you for a snake guy, with the snake thing wrapped around your hat and all--"
"Nope.. i like ducks more."
"Huh. Why do you have the snake and apple thing by the way?"
".."
He doesn't know what to say. He wouldn't say he likes the sinner, but he.. well.. started to grow into decent company. The only person he speaks to outside of his daughter, and that probably ends when he says 'oh by the way i'm the devil'
"I was religious in life" technically not a lie?? He IS a part of the religion as the literal devil and first fallen angel and thus is religious!
"Oh neat. I was the leader of a influential group"
"Do you mean a cult..?" Lucifer's eyebrow rises.
"Well-- i cant exactly say no."
Lucifer laughs after that. He isn't sure what to make of the way the sinner's screen lights up after.
He would literally rather be with the tv head guy right now then at this meeting.
"And then she liked bitched for half a hour because i fucked her sister and i was like-- what you though the dick-master was like exclusive or whatever?! Like i'm the first MAN bitch, i fuck who ever the fuck i want--"
"Adammm pleaseee what the hell is this meeting about?!" Lucifer groans his head slumped against the table.
"Quit rushing me. Your the asshole who stole both of my wives you have no right to complain about anything i do" Can the guy let that go already?!
"I hate to agree with him sir, but we are on a time crunch.." The women standing next to him speaks up, which he only met just now, who she is and why she follows Adam around? No clue. She's Flute or something like that--
"Alrightt.. fine danger tits--" what kind of nickname is that?! "Listen up bitch. Under the order of heaven, we are gonna like come down bi-annually to totally slaughter every demon in that shithole of a place you got down there"
WHAT.
"Hold on now--- your what?!" Lucifer can feel a burst of fire coming out of his mouth-
"Do i seriously have to repeat myself? Are you deaf?"
"What makes you think i would accept this?! I will NOT let you hurt my daughter--" Lucifer shot up from his seat, tail lashing out as he felt his wings unfold completely in what felt like the first time in forever.
"Oi--! Don't get your panties in a twist. Heaven's offering immunity to hellborns."
Anddd the anger is gone. Hmmm.. this could actually work for him! Bye bye sinners he can't kill himself! Oohh buttt Charlie would be SOOOO mad.. oh this is really tough to decide on--!
"Alright.. I agree to this completely but can you guys like make it look like i had no other choice but to accept this?"
"Well you do have no other choice but to accept this" Adam deadpans.
"Great--! Hah exactly--!" Lucifer winks.
"Don't fucking wink at me we are not friends"
"Right i know that. I hate you too Adam."
The first extermination is a blood bath.
He doesn't witness it. He just sees the aftermath of the bodies everywhere a week later.
And when he see's the TV-sinner man at the bar-- he's practically crushed in a brutal hug.
"I thought.. i thought you.. i couldn't find you.. anywhere.. and i didn't know-- i didn't know if you were--" his voice is glitching again.
Whats happening? He didn't think Box would care this much.
"Don't leave like that again. From now on.. i want to know where you are Lu." the sinner buried his head against Lucifer's neck.. inhaling deeply.
...
This has become too much now. Maybe they should.. just be distant again.
Except Lucifer never says it. Because he does NOT want to become the new red guy. (Having the sinner have a hate boner for him is not on his to-do list)
So for now this weird sort of friendship will continue.
"You have a daughter?" Vox blinked in surprise.
"Yep..! Greatest thing in my life." Lucifer smiled just thinking about her.
"So did your entire bloodline just go to hell or something..?"
"Well excuse you--! I'll have you know my daughter is a good and pure soul!"
"So she's in heaven..?"
".."
"I'll take that as a no."
Fucking asshole--!
"He disappeared.. he disappeared recently.." his voice glitched at the end.
"Huh..? Who..?" Lucifer looked up from his drink.
"Alastor--! WHo else?!" More glitching.
Who is Alastor again..? mmmmmmm... well theres only one guy Vox talks about the most-- and that's red guy.
"Righhttt.. Red guy.."
"Do.. do you think he's dead?"
You would think the sinner would be overjoyed if that was the case, (Lucifer knows he would be. Nothing against red guy, he doesn't know him personally, but it would stop the constant complaining from Vox) but the sinner sounded depressed.
"Well.. i don't know" Lucifer blinks one eyelid at a time.
"... Lu. You'll never leave right?"
... what?
"You'll stay right? You have to. You only talk to me after all. You need me."
A hand flew to grip Lucifer's chin.
"You need me." One of his eyes does a weird spiral thing and for the longest time Lucifer has no fucking clue what he's doing until-- it hits him
He's trying to fucking hypnotize him--!
"You need me.. and only me" He panted as he gripped him even harder. "Please.. please just love me.."
Lucifer shoves the sinner off. Technically he didn't hurt him because it was a light one so the barrier doesn't act up.
"WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU?!" Lucifer isn't sure why he's this angry. This upset.. this hurt..
Oh. Lucifer does.. he.. he actually thought they were friends. That the sinner wasn't so bad. Wasn't like the other sinners after all. (A stupid thing to start to think when your with a sinner, let alone a sinner who used to be a cult leader.)
He feels his wings lashing out-- his tail whipping through the air-- horns spouting-- and he knows. There's no mistaking it this time. The sinner will know he's the king of hell.
"Lu-- wait-- hold on--" Vox sounds sober now.
Lucifer's already leaving.
"Fuck-- just please--! God-- im sorry-- im sorry--! Don't leave like-- COME ON--! You said i didn't deserve what happened--" He's desperate. Talking fast, voice cracking.
Lucifer is walking down the alley and the sinner is following behind him.
"That's before you tried to fucking force yourself on me--!"
"THATS NOT WHAT HAPPENED--!" Vox's claws digged into Lucifer's arm. "And you-- you did something just as bad.." HAH?!?
"You lied to me Lu.. or should i call you Lucifer? A man of religion huh? Making me believe you were alive.. you really are the king of lies"
...
"Unhand your king sinner. That's a order." Lucifer's voice is cold to mask his fear. To mask the fact he cant actually make Vox let go.
He watches Vox's screen glitches get even more bad as it jerks.
"Lu.. come on.. please-- fuck- dont-- dont do this-- im sorry-- please--!"
Lucifer tugs to get his arm free again.
Vox falls to his knees and clings to his legs now. "I love you--! I love you so much my heart feels like it's pumping again-- please-- i'll do anything-- dont g0--!" Vox whines.
Lucifer no longer dislikes red guy. He clearly had the right idea about getting the fuck out of there.
"Let go before i kill you" Lucifer spat it out. Please.. please listen. There alone in the alley-- so please-- please let go. Please don't make it harder.
Vox releases him as he stares up with tears streaming down his face.
Lucifer doesn't hesitate to poof out of there.
This is the last fucking time he ever is nice to a sinner.
Vox lost everything.
Again..
Again..
He laughs hysterically as tears run down his screen-- "FUCK! FUCKK---!" he kicks a trash can. he slams his foot into it over and over and over.
Lucifer.. lucifer..
You really are.. a being of temptation aren't you?
You just want to be chased don't you? You want to dangle a apple and then get offended when someone dares to eat it.
Vox can play that game.. he can.. oh.. he understands.. he understands that you clearly want to be held down. To be forced. He can do that.