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The first thing to change was the way she slept.
On normal days, Mizi was a night owl.
She would persist into the ungodly hours, enjoying the silence night brought, recording melodies in their heavily padded closet. Her mic would be cradled close to her chest, a thermos of warm lemon tea nestled at her side.
Otherwise, she would simply edit the music on her laptop, with Sua curled comatose at her side, nonsensical hums escaping her as she made the melody come together under her headphones.
In the morning, classes would often pass by in a blur, with Mizi catching snippets of fitful sleep at her desk...or more likely Sua's shoulder, as the girl took notes for them both.
Till often complained about it, how her cheerfulness would somehow persist in the morning, while he just wanted to stab the nearest thing that made noise (Most often Ivan.)
But it was second nature to Mizi. The sunlit daze would just curl her lips into a smile. And she would let other people distract her from the itch behind her eyelids, occupying herself with whatever she could to keep slumber at bay. Be it her classmates, conversation with her professors, or volleyball on the campus grounds.
Most of the time with Sua close by, observing the world with a look that suggested she found it unimpressive at best.
Until they made it to the dark of their dorm, and Mizi got to bury herself under the Sua-scented blankets, drifting into warm bliss, a soft hand in her hair usually the last thing she remembered.
So...when she randomly started sleeping through the night, it was definitely noticeable.
The first time...waking up in the quiet morning before her partner was a uniquely disconcerting experience. No smell of coffee and tea brewing, no ticking of the timer as Sua heated up breakfast. Just the parch of her own throat, dragging her to the bedside table, to her cold, stale tea.
She sat in a trance on the bed, afterwards, waiting for her mind to catch up to her body, frozen until she felt Sua shuffle closer, searching for her warmth.
The wakefulness stuck to her all day, like a pill caught in her throat. Her usual friendliness was replaced with nervous chatter, clinging to Sua like a comfort blanket in a stranger's home.
When night arrived, however, she was shocked at the somnolence that had her drifting asleep inside their recording closet, her laptop patiently absorbing hours of her muffled breaths and shifting.
And that was a few days before the other effects surfaced.
The desire to wear Sua's clothes. So overwhelming that their entire wardrobe flipped in the matter of days. And the bitter, annoying scent of others, but especially Alphas—began to repulse her, make her actively nauseous. The feeling intensified to the extent that she began to wear a mask sprayed with Sua's perfume to their classes.
Hunger, heavy and unassailable, also overtook her faculties. She found herself parasitized with the thought of sweets, over-sugared caffeine, and the maddening lure of chocolate.
She took far too many free samples from the Ice Cream store Ivan worked at, dragging Sua by the arm each day into the establishment despite her protests. And her liberties with the store's sample policy became so egregious that Ivan had eventually offered to buy her a pint.
Sua's scent had soured quickly at the offer. Her arm shifting into her fluffy rabbit purse and pulling out a card.
Mizi had left the store that day clutching two heaping bags full of goods, stammering that she couldn't possibly finish it all alone.
Luckily for her, she didn't have to.
Because Sua's hunger soon began to rival her own.
Sua liked to be prepared for things.
She liked things moving in beautiful, predictable patterns—with symmetry and order.
She liked mathematics, re-watching old sitcoms, and taking her tea twice a day with one lump of sugar and a scone...no exceptions.
Conversely, she loathed surprise parties, Jazz music, and all unsolicited social interaction.
So she noticed immediately when the familiar rhythms of her body began to shift.
How one lump of sugar became three, her muscles succumbing to fatigue earlier than normal in her workouts, the unstoppable urge to spend her day curled in Mizi's "recording booth" in favor of attending their classes, to bury her nose into the shirts Mizi discarded to the hamper after volleyball.
So she checked the Firefight app several times a day, because sex-ed had taught her the signs of an impending heat very well, even if it had come with a sexist monologue about an omega's responsibility to not tempt rabid alphas, who would take any opportunity to sheathe their knots.
She double and triple confirmed it over pints of ice cream...that her and Mizi's suppressant shots were all up to date. That, by all factors of reason, their heats should be well under control.
And yet the symptoms persisted. And Sua wasn't sure what to make of that.
The research rabbithole she fell into online was conflicting, as it so often was regarding omega-omega relationships.
Synched heats were known to happen of course, especially among sexually bonded omegas. But there was no shortage of religious blogs online proclaiming that it was impossible for omegas to bond sexually in the first place. That any such behavior was the result of demonic possession.
Some scientific articles insisted that paired omegas calmed each other's cycles, making synched heats more bearable for each party, and protecting them from lurking alphas by masking their scents. While others described the opposite effect, with synched heats between omegas feeding on each other's pheromones, making bodies crave satisfaction in each other to the point of psychosis...and sometimes severe injury.
Others explained that some omega bodies just rejected suppressants, but that the effect was rare. And, in the rarest of cases, there were the articles of omega copulation triggering parthenogenesis, which Sua could have sworn was a myth until she came across a documentary of an omega man and woman holding a toddler, that looked like a carbon copy of the man.
The videos she searched up to understand synched heats had the slick pooling between her legs, and by that time she decided to call it a day, and made her way to Mizi's "recording booth", any impending heat be damned.
Their bodies were conserving energy for something, she could tell.
But Mizi was as enthusiastic as ever when she pinned Sua's hips to the padded wall, bunching up her dress to bury her face between Sua's pale thighs, her tongue running practiced patterns between her folds, lapping at her engorged clit, her pleased sounds sending vibrations straight up Sua's spine.
If Sua noticed how Mizi had "forgotten" to pause the recording on her microphone, she couldn't be bothered to point it out.
It wasn't long before Sua was mewling against Mizi's mouth, unsure if she wanted her iron grip in Mizi's hair to wrench her away or have her force a third or fourth wave of boneless pleasure from her mouth and fingers.
They both ended up sleeping in the closet that night.
There had been no heats for either of them in their time together. Not yet.
Even as the love they had found in one another consumed them whole. A fascination akin to worship, igniting ever since Sua had walked into her dorm, clutching a suitcase handle, and had caught Mizi's glasses glinting in the sunlight, as the pink-haired girl balanced a tattered copy of Anthony and Cleopatra on her knees.
This girl had smiled at her, her amber eyes glowing honey-gold in her direction— and a part of Sua had surrendered then and there, to a new faith...Recognized a new deity in the pantheon of her heart.
She had learnt many things about Mizi soon after, during nights spent full of whispered conversation, both of them caught like stars in each others orbit. And she devoured each scrap of knowledge with the greed of a devotee, which she hadn't known herself to possess.
So she knew Mizi had largely spent her heats alone, her very indulgent adoptive mother spending egregious amounts of money on state-of-the-art Milders. Drugs that reduced even the most resistant cycles to near-beta levels.
All the while Sua's parents had preferred the suppression implant method.
Her sister had made the appointment the very night of her presentation. And she was grateful for that, in a way. For her over-cautiousness.
It had allowed her a sense of self-possession...and a focus in her life she wouldn't have had otherwise.
But something about it—or maybe something in her upbringing overall—had dulled her all the same.
And she couldn't help but feel this stifled apathy, an absent heaviness in her emotions that she yearned to release. To let go in a way that was primal, destructive and free, even as she feared it.
It was a lack that made her flatten the gas pedal most times she drove, that made her prefer the sharpness of needles, and jumping into ice cold baths. Even as she took her suppressants with an efficacy bordering on clinical, even as she clung to routine and order with everything she had.
It was why, when Sua finally awoke one day to a gnawing need between her legs, to Mizi's ice cream laden tongue lapping at the borders of her scent gland, her abdomen simmering red-hot in a way it never had before...her first response was to scramble away with her phone.
It was humorous, terrifying—and so very, painfully arousing—the way Mizi whined for her then, the way she clutched at Sua as she left her embrace, her hands coiling into the fabric of Sua's night gown, her face flushed down to her neck.
Sua's eyes flickered uncontrollably over her body, over her sweat slicked thighs, clad only in her pink panties and one of Sua's tank tops, the hard peaks of her nipples moving under the fabric as she panted.
There was no mistaking it this time.
They had already made a nest, Sua registered, amidst her climbing panic and arousal. And her mind teetered on a sharp cliff, the hunger in her chest roiling like a living creature—a greedy, evil thing.
They had locked and darkened their dorm for the night, piled together inside familiar sheets, now reinforced with articles of their clothing, Mizi's laptop balanced between them as the movie lulled them to sleep.
Reaching the bathroom was a feat she was impressed to manage on her wobbling legs, and with the molten heat growing between them. And she slammed the door shut with her back, even as Mizi pleaded with her to stay.
Her hand trembled as she thumbed through her contacts, very aware that Mizi's scent was everywhere, a viscous amber in her lungs, clogging up her thoughts.
It had slowly mingled with her own over the days, morphing into something overwhelming and delicious, and Sua was shuddering with every breath she took, the ache in her abdomen growing malignant.
Was she really going to do this?
The voice which answered the phone was cheerful and robotic:
"Hello! This is the Seoul Omicronology Helpline, for all your Omega health needs! If you or an omega you know are in need of Emergency Suppressants, press 1. If you or an omega you know are in need of safe escort services, press 2. If you wish to consult your sexual health physician, press 3—"
Sua, now having curled into a ball outside her bedroom door, flattening her face against the tile to cool her boiling skin, pressed three, as her other hand crawled between her thighs, yearning to relieve some of the pressure there.
But it was useless—
She knew nothing but Mizi would relieve this.
Why was she even calling?
A bossanova tune mocked her as her number was tracked to find her designated doctor.
She let out a half-screech of frustration at the wait, biting at her hand until the taste of copper met her tongue.
On the other side of the door, Mizi whimpered, and the sound sliced right through Sua's chest.
"Please, Sua..." She heard, accompanied by a wretched little sob. "I need you. I can't—Please."
Sua bit harder into her hand, a strangled gasp escaping her at the spike of pleasure-pain it elicited.
"Let me have you please?" Mizi murmured, her nails scraping gently on the other side. "Let me..."
She was right there—nothing but a shitty plane of wood separating them. Her God, the avatar of her faith, calling her to worship.
What gave Sua the right to refuse?
Fear?
What was faith then, but a leap into darkness? The act of baring your neck to a force you couldn't understand, but loved beyond life itself anyway?
What better fate then, to be afraid? To be called to devotion despite it.
"Hello? Sua? Is that you, dear? Is everything alright." The matronly voice of her doctor said at last.
Sua declined the call, and pressed the power button till the screen faded to black.
Her reflection in the screen stared back at her, disheveled and wide eyed.
Alive. Truly alive.
Everything inside her stilled then, only the pounding of her own heart against her ribs registering in the quiet.
She lifted herself up on her shaking legs.
And pulled open the door, the old hinges squeaking reliably as she did.
Mizi's arms wrapped around her waist almost immediately, nails digging into her sides as she pulled her close.
Sua's insides clenched at her proximity—at the warm breath against her stomach, those beautiful amber eyes shining up at her, glistening with tears.
Mizi sobbed, pressing hot, open mouthed kisses into her midriff, her tongue wetting the fabric in her haste, climbing up Sua's body.
Halfway through, Sua's hands grasped the sides of her face and yanked, crashing their lips together in her desperation.
It was a mess, interspersed with the sharpness of teeth, more an attempt to devour each other than a kiss.
Sua bit at Mizi's tongue as it invaded her mouth, and kept biting until she heard Mizi's voice sharpen at the pain, and the fresh taste of metal coated her tongue.
Her god returned the favor, nails scratching up her sides in sharp, twin stabs. Her mouth unrelenting against Sua's own.
God, Sua needed it, needed Mizi more than she had needed anything else.
"Take me." She begged, gripping at the back of Mizi's neck as though she wished for her fingers to sink through skin into the flesh below. "Take me, and give me all of yourself."
Amber irises nearly disappeared under Mizi's expanding pupils.
The taller girl melted into her with a whine, pushing her body roughly against the door, enveloping her with her scent as her hands roamed over every part of Sua she could reach.
She bit hard at the crook of Sua's jaw, sucking at the skin between her teeth, while coaxing her nightgown down her shoulders.
The soft silk fabric quietly crumpled to the floor.
Mizi's lips roamed lower, pausing to inhale deeply at her scent gland, teasing at the sensitive patch with her tongue until Sua was shivering beneath her.
"You smell so good." She murmured into her skin, her fingers fumbling with the latches of Sua's bra, tugging until it joined the nightgown on the floor.
A moan tore out of Sua as Mizi began to knead at her breasts, squeezing them together, fingers pressing into the soft flesh with a roughness that Sua craved, even as it lit matches of pain under her skin.
She crumpled into Mizi with a whine when the girl began pinching and tugging at her nipples, abusing the sensitive buds between her fingers, occasionally utilizing the sharpness of her nails in a way that had Sua on the verge of tears.
"You're so fucking cute, Sua." Mizi groaned, before sinking her teeth into the flesh on the underside of her breast, hard enough that Sua squeaked, sure that the imprint of teeth remained.
She couldn't reply, or breathe, couldn't do much more than feel and crave. So she just held onto her, her hips rocking into Mizi's own, all too aware of the slick wetness between them, both their panties entirely soaked.
She groaned as the blinding heat of Mizi's clothed center met her own for a second, making stars flash in the darkness of her eyelids, her head buried in Mizi's neck, nose nudging at her scent gland.
But Mizi pulled away, palming at Sua's throat as she tried to chase her, making something inside Sua clench with a forbidden thrill.
Honey eyes seared into the place where their hips rolled together, taking in their soaked panties, white and pink, their thighs glistening with shared sweat and slick.
Her head tilted almost curiously, and she pinched sharply at Sua's nipple, pulling a moan from her abused lips, the sound vibrating under Mizi's palm as it travelled up her throat.
Mizi let out a hysterical little giggle at that, her fingers tightening against her neck, applying the slightest pressure as she reached down to the waistband of Sua's panties.
She hooked her fingers into the waistline and tugged slowly, pulling upwards, tightening the material against Sua's core until it hurt, the wet cloth digging between her lips.
"M-Mizi..." Sua whimpered, digging her nails into her wrist, her hips bucking at the delicious, painful friction.
So good...
...but not enough to fill the clamping ache in her insides yet.
She nudged her leg against the other woman's core, relishing the way fingers tightened around her throat, the way hot thighs clamped around her own, rubbing with a wet, frantic need.
But Mizi continued to tug the fabric of her panties even tighter against her, and Sua couldn't help the way the growing pain mixed with the pleasure pushed her closer to the edge, as she ground against the fabric and Mizi's thigh.
It was the sound of the fabric finally tearing, the sharp pain, and the tight, heady feeling of air being kept from her lungs that suddenly pushed her over, tearing an orgasm from her that had her mind blanking in white-hot pleasure, before she fell limp into Mizi's arms.
Mizi let out a delighted giggle at this, lifting the filthy, torn fabric of Sua's panties, observing it hungrily before she brought it to her mouth.
Her fingers pushed it between her lips, cheeks bulging around the fabric—and she let out a heady moan at the taste, head falling back, her hips still rocking steadily on Sua's thigh.
Sua's body throbbed with an intensified hunger at the sight, pressing her thigh even harder against Mizi's center, her hands climbing up her tank to play with taut nipples, teeth clamping hard around her earlobe.
It wasn't long before Mizi came under her touch this way, chanting what Sua assumed was her name with each rhythmic jerk of her hips, muffled by Sua's panties.
Oddly enough, it reminded Sua of prayer.
"More." She ordered, begged, commanded, the second Mizi collapsed into her neck, the emptiness inside her core driving her insane. She punctuated her point with a harsh bite to Mizi's collarbone, making the other girl gasp in her aftershocks, marveling at the pink indents her teeth left on pretty skin.
"On the bed," Mizi gasped, after pulling Sua's panties from her mouth, lips glistening with spit, the madness in her eyes matching her own, and that was the last thing Sua registered before she was dragged forcefully to their bed.
Their nest, she thought, her body filling with a new, intensified arousal when the scent of their clothes became stronger, surrounding her in familiarity, and warmth, and need.
Sua's back hit the soft sheets and she didn't have a moment to breathe or think before Mizi crawled on top of her, tugging her into a wet, filthy kiss, the taste of Sua's slick mingling in their mouths as Mizi's tongue danced with her own.
And she was burning, she was a black hole collapsing under its own gravity, unable to do anything but whine that need pathetically against Mizi's lips, begging for mercy the only way she could.
Mizi seemed to understand the extent of it all too well, and there was no hesitation as she scratched her nails down her abdomen, leaving fresh pink lines on her pale skin.
Her hand quickly found Sua's entrance, and the relief when two fingers slipped inside of her had Sua nearly screaming against her lips, barely aware of the tears pricking the corners of her eyelids.
Mizi was practiced with Sua's body, and the crooks of her fingers were quick to find the rough patch that had Sua whining harder, eyes rolling into the back of her head.
But still...
"More—I need more, Mizi please." She begged, searching for all the friction she could, anything but the gnawing emptiness.
There was a delightful stretch as Mizi added a third finger, then a fourth shortly after, testing the limits of anything Sua had taken before—but all Sua could to was whimper with need, chanting the word More like a supplication.
Her god simply laughed at her, and a delirious part of Sua wondered how Mizi coped with feeling the same way she did, empty and gnawing.
In the moments when Sua could bear to open her eyes, the glint of Mizi's eyes on her own was manic, fierce and hungry, her cheeks flushed alarmingly.
"You're so beautiful." She whimpered, gasping as she flattened her palm against Mizi's scorched cheek.
Mizi's eyes widened, and her jaw set into a wide grin, moving to tug roughly at Sua's nipple, and her fingers curled inside again at just the right angle.
Sua groaned, head snapping back as another orgasm overtook her body, her walls rippling around Mizi's fingers, her spine curving in an arc under the pleasure.
And Mizi's wrist angled itself, and Sua gasped again at the stretch as Mizi's thumb slipped inside her. The stretch at the widest part of her hand was insane, and something primal and intense in Sua's mind begged for it.
"Please," she babbled, barely aware of her own words anymore, "My Mizi, my god, please. I need y—"
There was the flutter of a kiss against her face, making her words strangle into a sob.
The moment Mizi's hand slipped in to the wrist, entering with an obscene little pop, Sua's walls trembled under the weight of a release that had every last semblance of sanity slipping from her thoughts, the feeling of emptiness finally disappearing, replaced by a blessed, mind-numbing fullness.
When consciousness, or at least something resembling it returned to Sua's reality a while later, she became aware of Mizi leaning over her, her beautiful golden eyes absolutely wild, her fist still sheathed inside of Sua, sending wild sparks of pleasure as she rocked herself against Sua's thigh, lines of fresh tears making their way down her face.
Her hair caged Sua in like a cave, the morning light turning everything a light pink like a filter, and the coolness of her tears fell against Sua's overheated skin.
And she was rambling...
No—she was begging—the words just now reaching past the muffled haze of Sua's thoughts.
"Please, please please, Sua-unnie," she sobbed, her fist clenching into the sheets beside Sua's head, her arm trembling under her own weight. "Please, I need your knot, please, I need it."
Sua's heart clenched, admiring how patient and beautiful her omega had been for her. At how incredibly wrecked she looked.
And who was Sua to refuse her god?
She pushed at Mizi's chest, straightening her on top of her thigh, her own hips chasing yet more friction on the hand buried inside her.
Mizi quickly pushed herself onto the two fingers she offered, riding her with a renewed frantic energy, a string of thankyous falling from her lips alongside her moans.
And Sua was entranced at the sight, working her fingers in and out, gasping as Mizi's arm pistoned inside her, their movements chasing each other.
She devoured each of the heightened sounds from Mizi's lips. Watching completely entranced as she orgasmed under three of her fingers, and continued riding her without so much as a breath.
"Are you ready to take it, my love?" She asked, almost teasingly, amidst her pants, her body approaching it's fourth release, and she needed it to coincide with her fist, her knot entering Mizi's warm, tight entrance.
"Yes, yes... please!" Mizi cried out, nearly impaling herself on Sua's fingers, her whole hand on the verge of slipping inside from the slickness and intense rocking alone.
And, oh god, Sua was close, Mizi's hand inside her dragging the pleasure out of her insides, soaking the sheets beneath them.
Distantly, as she angled her wrist, her brain remembered with a flash the sight of an omega man holding a child exactly like him.
"I wonder if— I'll get you pregnant—with a little you." She said between gasps, almost to herself, as her thumb stretched out Mizi's entrance.
There was a strangled whine, and Mizi's eyes met hers, the hand inside her stuttering at the words.
Her hips snapped forward, desperately, to take Sua's fist inside fully...
The feeling of it, of being sheathed fully inside of Mizi, of her Mizi was the first thing that finally drew her off the cliff to her orgasm.
And the last was the feeling of Mizi's teeth finding her neck and clamping with a searing sharpness into her scent gland.
Her vision went white, the feeling so intense that nothing remained inside her but Mizi, no thoughts, no self, nothing but the one she'd given herself to. Her everything. Her whole body was wrung out with wave after wave of pleasure. And she was distantly aware of Mizi's walls clamping vice-like around her knot, draining her of everything she had, her name a prayer on her god's lips.
"Did you mean it?"
Sua blinked one eye open, catching honey-gold eyes glinting at her in the dark of night, wide open, despite the late hour.
Some things never change.
"Mean what?" She asked, curling her arm to pull her closer, nuzzling her face into her bare chest.
Mizi's breath stuttered under her affection, and the slow build of heat in Sua's core reminded her exactly why bodies saved up on energy during heats.
"A-about—" Mizi stammered, chewing at her words in a maddeningly cute way. "About one day getting me..."
"Pregnant?" Sua finished flatly, stroking at her hair, a yawn escaping her throat despite herself.
Mizi nodded, her eyes shifting to everything except Sua's gaze. And Sua wondered what the point of the pretense was.
Surely she knew?
"Or one day you could do the same." She shrugged, the sleep lingering on her eyelids and fighting against the desire building in her body.
Heats lasted for a few days...it was probably important to save her strength for later.
"Together?" Mizi asked, tilting Sua's chin up to meet her gaze, her eyes wide and disbelieving. "Even if our love is not like others?"
Such a foolish deity. Sua thought.
"Yes, Mizi." She said, wrapping herself against Mizi's chest fully.
And if Mizi said anything else. Sua didn't hear it through the veil of her sleep.