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Here’s the thing with Yang Jungwon: he is meticulous and deliberate just as he is clumsy and stubborn.
For the life of him, he has always made sure that his chess pieces are in a neat line without being conscious of the play his opponent is making. He liked to be calculated for the sake of it, not as some defense or coping mechanism; he just liked having things in order and under his control.
Jungwon had his life in order, technically and by his own definition, even if his own relationships started falling apart. All the girls he had spoken to had complained about him having his defenses up all the time, never letting them in even if they had already been on the fifth base or so.
He is selfish like that, one might say. Jungwon values self-preservation, and he doesn’t like letting people get to the best of him. Sure, he may or may not choose to let some people in, but the minute they step out of line, he’d shove them right back out, shut the door on their faces and lock it.
Heart kept inside his ribcage, fluttering like a bird not having seen yet the clear blue sky, Jungwon, for the longest time, was sure that he was doing it right.
He knew what he was doing. He was sure of it.
Jungwon had priorities, but it seemed that it was only him that had those. Even if his friends (Heeseung hyung, specifically) kept on telling him that he should do more, be more, Jungwon just waved their unwanted pieces of advice away like fruit flies.
After all, he had lived long, satisfied and happy, with just how he was living—that was, until he met Kim Sunoo.
It all began when Jungwon barged in Sim Jaeyun’s dorm room unannounced with the intention to simply bother him, only to find an unknown boy squatting down beside an opened luggage. It appeared that his entrance had startled the boy with the way his eyes were blown wide and his mouth hung open.
“Who are you?” Jungwon asked, his mouth moving before his brain processed how rude he sounded.
“Jungwon-ah! Jesus, can’t you knock?”
Jaeyun’s voice echoed from the small kitchenette by his left. Jungwon would’ve looked at him if he weren’t distracted by the soft curl of the boy’s hair, his three piercings on his right ear, and his glimmering rosy plump lips. He didn’t want to seem weird by noticing all the little details immediately, but he couldn’t help it. The boy was pretty. That was a fact.
“This is Kim Sunoo,” Jaeyun stepped by his side as he pulled Jungwon closer and away from the door, closing it with his foot. “He’s the sophomore transfer student. The one that I told you about last time.”
With that, memories of last week’s conversation over hot pot came to mind. Jaeyun had mentioned that he won’t be dorming alone anymore since an transfer student would be moving in. Jungwon had, honest to God, tried to listen, but his mind was preoccupied more with the earful that his workshop classmates had given him about his poetry collection.
“Oh.”
Eyes still trained on the boy—Kim Sunoo, he told himself—Jungwon nodded. Sunoo moved to stand, and Jungwon noticed just how tall he is.
“Sunoo-yah, this is Yang Jungwon. He’s a junior from the English department. Younger than you, but still in the same year as I am. This smartass.”
Jaeyun spoke as he moved some of his stuff on the floor up to his bed to make space. Sunoo offered him a smile and a hand, and in return, Jungwon took it. The boy’s hand was soft. Warm. Slender in a way that it seemed small in Jungwon’s hand despite them being the same height.
“Nice meeting you, Jungwon-ssi.”
“Just call him sunbae, Sunoo-yah. He hates formalities.” Jaeyun interjected as he took a seat on his bed, with all the mess. Sunoo let go of his hand first, and Jungwon put his inside the pockets of his jeans.
“Yeah, sunbae is fine.” Jungwon spoke for the first time. “Sorry if I startled you earlier, by the way.”
“Oh, no.” Sunoo laughed as he waved it off. “It was nothing.”
Jungwon was about to ask Sunoo what his major was when all of a sudden, Jaeyun stood with an “aha!” look on his face.
“Sunoo-yah! Come have dinner with us!”
Jungwon looked over at Sunoo who had a stunned expression.
“Oh, I—I don’t want to impose, hyung.”
The older boy stuttered as he side-eyed Jungwon shyly. His ears were turning a shade of red as so were his cheeks. Jungwon could tell that Sunoo was hesitant, possibly uncomfortable with his presence.
“Sunoo-yah, you won’t be imposing. We always have new faces around, don’t we, Jungwon-ah?”
Jaeyun smiled at him with an expression that was asking him to say yes. Normally, they don’t tug new people in their friend dinners. As many of them were introverts, they usually keep to themselves. However, Jungwon could see why Jaeyun would say otherwise. It was the only way to persuade the older boy. So, he decided to play along.
“Yeah, the guys would love to have you there.” Jungwon offered a small smile as he leaned against the Jaeyun’s desk. “You could also meet Jongseong hyung and Riki. They’re transfer students too.”
“And Sangwonie, though he has a permanent residence in town now.”
Jungwon watched Sunoo rub his hand over his neck as the older boy looked at the two of them. He seemed to be assessing the situation, seeing if there was even a shred of uneasiness from either Jaeyun or Jungwon. To make it known that they were genuine about the offer, Jungwon smiled as he spoke.
“We’d be happy to have you, Sunoo hyung. Do come.”
And so, Kim Sunoo came to the dinner. Jaeyun sent a heads-up to the group chat that he’d be bringing over his new roommate, so everyone better be on their best behavior. Now, with everyone but Jaeyun and Sunoo in the Chinese family restaurant just outside the campus that they all came to love, Park Sunghoon directed a question to Jungwon.
“Is he cute, Jungwon-ah?”
Myung Jaehyun almost choked on his drink as Lee Sanghyeok slapped his back. Nishimura Riki whined as most of what Jaehyun spat out went onto him. Jungwon was left bewildered.
“What?”
“You heard him, Jungwon-ah.”
Park Jongseong interjected as he handed more tissue to Jaehyun. The other boy blushed as he mumbled his thanks.
“I’m not sure what you mean.”
Sunghoon rolled his eyes as he repeated the question. “D’you think he’s cute? The transfer student?”
“Sunoo-ssi.” Riki said teasingly.
“Sunoo-ssi?” Kim Donghyun said as he approached them, holding up the food that they ordered on a tray. “Why’re you talking about the new guy?”
“Jungwonie finds him cute.” Jaehyun muttered as he assisted Donghyun.
“I never said that, hyung.” Jungwon frowned. “Stop putting words in my mouth.”
“Heard he’s pretty.” Lee Heeseung added, his eyes taunting as he looked at Jungwon.
“People were talking about a pretty transfer student in the lounge earlier. Maybe that’s him.” Lee Sangwon spoke as he leaned against his hand, elbow propped up against the table.
“Oh, I bet. Jungwon’s turning pink.” Sunghoon pointed out, which resulted to everyone around the table to stare at him and burst out laughing.
“You’re all insufferable.” Jungwon rolled his eyes as he felt his phone vibrate in his pocket. Then, as he was about to get it out, a warm hand landed on his shoulder. He turned to see Jaeyun smiling at him. Sunoo was right behind him.
“What’re you laughing about?” Jaeyun asked as he stepped towards the empty seat by Jungwon’s right side.
“Jungwonie finally has a crush on someone.” Sunghoon blurted out. A round of laughter began again, with only Sunoo left clueless. Almost like a lost puppy.
“I hate you all.” Jungwon muttered under his breath as he leaned back, picking up his chopsticks in the process.
“Interesting.” Jaeyun said thoughtfully. “Anyways, guys, meet Kim Sunoo. The transfer student.”
Jungwon turned to look at Sunoo again. The boy, draped in an oversized baby blue sweater and some denim pants, smiled brightly. His whisker dimples made an appearance, and Jungwon couldn’t help but feel endeared. As Sunoo offered a half-bow, looking around the people in the table, his eyes lingered a second longer on Jungwon. Jungwon felt his heart skip at this, but he pretended he didn’t.
“Hello. I’m Kim Sunoo, a sophomore taking up music studies.” Sunoo shyly introduced himself. Jungwon noticed how he fiddled with his hands.
“Music studies? Are you doing education, composition, or performance?” Heeseung inquired as he is also taking up the same program.
Sunoo’s smile grew. “Performance. Mainly voice, but I also plan to take performance classes here and there.”
“Oh, Heeseung hyung is also taking the same program.” Jaeyun stated as he pulled out the chair right beside Jungwon. “Sunoo-yah, sit here. I’ll just head to the comfort room real quick.”
Sunoo moved to take his seat, scooting closer to Jungwon as he pulled himself in. Belatedly, Jungwon noticed the fruity and floral scent radiating from the older boy. Peach and jasmine, he figured.
“So, what brought you here to Seoul?” Sanghyeok asked as he poured Sunoo a glass of water from across the table. Sunoo muttered his thanks before responding.
“My aunt told me about the music program here. She said I shouldn’t let the opportunity pass, so I applied and… well, here I am.”
“You must be good, then, hyung.” Donghyun’s eyes shimmered as he leaned closer, his elbow knocking against Jongseong’s. Jaeyun arrived and sat right next to the empty seat beside Sunoo.
“Oh, I’m… not…”
Jungwon noticed the faint blush on Sunoo’s cheek. Then, he realized that he had been looking at the boy a little too closely. In an effort to play it cool, he reached for the fried rice only to meet Jongseong’s eyes across the table. There was a flint of mischief in them. If Jungwon knew him well enough—which, he certainly does—he’d be sure that the older boy across him was pulling his leg. As he served himself some rice, he raised an eyebrow at him. The conversation around him was still ongoing, and unbeknownst to them, Jungwon and Jongseong were having a separate one.
Jongseong smiled briefly. Looked at Sunoo, then back at him. Then, annoyingly, he raised his eyebrows provokingly. Jungwon frowned as he put down the serving spoon and shook his head, eyes still locked on Jongseong. Right when he was about to pull his arm back to pick up his chopsticks, Jungwon knocked over Sunoo’s glass. The water spilled across the table, earning a surprised sound from everyone. Some splattered onto Sunoo, causing him to flinch back. Thankfully, most of the spill was absorbed by the tablecloth. It didn’t free him from the embarrassment, of course.
“Shit, Jungwon-ah!” Jaeyun exclaimed as he pulled away. Sunoo mimicked the action, not without a laugh.
“You’re so clumsy.” Jongseong said playfully.
“Shut up, hyung.” Jungwon uttered before turning to Sunoo hastily. “Fuck, hyung. I’m so sorry.”
Jungwon reached to get some napkins only to find the container empty. Jaehyun laughed as he stood up, saying that he’ll ask for more.
“It’s okay, sunbae. Really.” Sunoo insisted as he let out a few chuckles.
“Sunbae?” Sangwon piped in as Jaehyun handed Jungwon the pile of napkins. Awkwardly handing half of the pile to Sunoo, just in case he got wet, Jungwon then began patting the table cloth in an effort to lessen the mess.
“Oh, Jaeyun hyung told me that Jungwon sunbae didn’t like too much formalities—”
“Aren’t you older than us?” Donghyun asked rhetorically, his eyes shifting between Sunoo and Jungwon. At this, Sunoo paused wiping his arm and looked at Donghyun. Stunned, with his eyes blown wide the same way they were when Jungwon barged into their room a couple of hours ago.
“Yeah, hyung.” Riki added. “You can call us by our names. Except Jongseong hyung, he’s stingy about honorifics.”
Jongseong made a move to smack Riki at the back of his head, but the boy avoided it while laughing.
“Oh, I don’t want to be—”
Sunoo tried to say as he laughed it off, but Jaehyun held up his hand. Filled with rice and stew, he opened his mouth to speak not before Sanghyeok smacked his arm.
“Swallow before you speak.”
Jaehyun closed his mouth at Sanghyeok’s word, resigned.
“Seriously, though.” Heeseung leaned forward to look past Jungwon and meet Sunoo’s eyes. “Call us hyung. We’ve already adopted you.”
Everyone spoke in agreement—except for Jungwon who was still embarrassed by his clumsy stunt earlier. Distracted by finishing up his wiping, he didn’t notice that the conversation topic already changed. He sighs in relief before going back to eating. As he let his eyes drift from his food, he noticed Sunoo looking at him. Jungwon raised his eyebrows in question. Instead of answering, however, Sunoo just shook his head as he smiled. Because he felt like he needed to say something, Jungwon cleared his throat.
“Sunoo hyung.”
Sunoo turned his head again, his cheeks full. Jungwon almost choked on his spit.
“You don’t have to call me sunbae. It’s okay.”
Jungwon watched as Sunoo’s smile grew, and for a moment, Jungwon was grateful that only he got to see it.
“Okay, Jungwon-ah.”
It was only then that Jungwon realized that his friends might be right. Looking at Sunoo, a boy he just met hours ago with his whisker dimples and wide bright eyes, he finally came to two conclusions: 1) Kim Sunoo is, indeed, pretty, and 2) Yang Jungwon might’ve just fallen headfirst for the boy.
It was only a matter of time before Jungwon grew to want Sunoo in ways that scares him. The object of his affections, the subject of his desire. This raw and unforgiving hunger inside of him craves, so desperately, that he wonders about how the boy would look like once he had been made his.
Jungwon wanted, in the beginning, only to spend more time with him. He was meticulous, after all. He knew what he needed to do even if his heart tried to break past his ribcage, shattering his insides as he tried to hide the smile mirroring Sunoo’s when he offered him a ride home. He began hanging out more often in Jaeyun’s dorm just to see Sunoo. Jaeyun, of course, knew what he was up to. Heeseung as well, and Sangwon. Jongseong probably had an inkling ever since he saw Jungwon walking Sunoo to his car one afternoon, an innocent gesture to drive the older boy to his class on the other side of the campus turned into a heated conversation in the group chat.
“Are you courting Sunoo-yah?” Jongseong opened, tagging him in the message. Then, everyone came following through.
“Courting? That’s still a thing?” Sanghyeok asked.
Donghyun immediately replied. “Just because you’ve been celibate for your entire life doesn’t mean that much has changed.”
“Didn’t know that hyung would be so…” Riki left hanging.
“Romantic?” Jaehyun finished.
“Well, what did we expect from Jungwon himself?” Heeseung commented.
Everyone then went back to teasing him and Sunoo. It would’ve bothered Jungwon if it wasn’t true. But it was, so he kept quiet.
Jungwon knew what he wanted, and he knew what he needed to do to get it. It didn’t matter to him how others thought of him because of that.
From “coincidental” meet-ups, Jungwon eased Sunoo into intentional ones. An hour in the cafe talking about their favorite films turned into five hours in Jungwon’s car as the older boy took a nap. The longest time they spent with each other, for the past two months that they had been “hanging out,” was when Sunoo spent the weekend over at Jungwon’s dorm because the former’s roommate had his boyfriend over.
Initially, it was all innocent. Guiltless, clean-handed. They genuinely liked having each other’s company. Sunoo knew that, and so did Jungwon. They knew each other’s likes and dislikes, had each other’s birthdays already on their phone calendars, and, for some reason, gave each other the keys to each other’s dorm (something that Jaeyun did not appreciate but allowed anyway).
They easily became good friends. It was all casual before, but now they only grew closer.
And that is why they were also aware that they were venturing uncharted territory.
With Sunoo brushing his hand against Jungwon’s during the weekly dinner their friend group have, a gentle smile etched across his face as he leaned in to look at Jungwon over Jaeyun or Heeseung’s shoulders, Jungwon could hear his heart pounding in his ears.
Or when Jungwon would hold Sunoo’s wrist a little tighter when he’s looking at the boy’s phone, his fingers feeling Sunoo’s racing pulse as he unintentionally breathed against Sunoo’s ear.
Or when, while Jungwon had just woken up from their nap inside the car, he saw Sunoo watching him closely, bottom lip trapped against his teeth as he fought a growing smile.
“You snore when you sleep, you know.”
There was a tug at Jungwon’s chest, one that clearly responded to the intimacy of the moment. It wasn’t foreign to Jungwon, this feeling of tenderness. He would always be overwhelmed by it whenever Sunoo was around. That boy was the only one who could summon such affection from him. The magnitude of the emotion didn’t go unnoticed as well.
“No, I do not.”
“Yes. You do.”
Jungwon playfully frowned as he fixed the driver’s seat upward, glancing at his phone to check the time. He still had 40 minutes left before Sunoo had to leave. Without warning, there was a pang in his heart.
“Don’t worry, Jungwon-ah.” Sunoo continued as he ruffled his bangs before sweeping them back, his eyes bright and free for Jungwon to get lost in. “You’re still cute.”
Jungwon tried to tell himself that it was just some silly infatuation in the beginning. How Sunoo looked lovely when his eyes sparkled under fluorescent lights. How Sunoo looked lovely when his smile grew big enough that Jungwon could see his gums. How Sunoo looked lovely when his fingers would tap against the dashboard of Jungwon’s car, matching the beat of the song from Sunoo’s playlist.
Except Jungwon was self-aware. He was conscious of what his wants were and how far he was willing to go to get it. He was versed with the turning of his stomach, the itch under his skin, the pounding inside of his chest enough to know that whatever he felt about Sunoo was no infatuation.
Jungwon was aware of how badly he wanted Sunoo—and he knew that he would do what it takes to get a taste of him.
And Jungwon did. Three weeks after he had settled with the fact that his desire for Sunoo grew beyond simple infatuation. It was borderline obsession. He had never imagined himself to be the possessive type of lover, but as he watched Sunoo in the arms of some other student at Heeseung’s house party, Jungwon had to come into terms with it.
Clutching the beer bottle in his hand, Jungwon couldn’t tear his eyes off the sight. Sunoo was there before him, so it would make sense that the older man didn’t know about his presence. It didn’t help erase the image of Sunoo feeling up others while Jungwon was away. If this was how the boy was without his company, Jungwon wondered how he was when Jungwon was nowhere near him.
The jealousy was a large mass in the back of his throat. He tried to wash it down with his stale beer, tried to distract himself by conversing with Anton beside him. Those, of course, didn’t work. The music was loud, the bass was tangible, and Jungwon’s skin burned at the sight of someone else’s hand creeping around Sunoo’s waist.
“Dude.” Anton spoke up, following the direction of his intense stare. “Jesus Christ, you’re so obsessed.”
“What.” Jungwon still couldn’t take his eyes off of Sunoo, now blushing under the person’s touch.
“You might break the bottle if you don’t stop this.”
Only then did Jungwon look away to see his grip around the neck of the bottle tight, the veins on his hands visible. Anton let out a chuckle.
“If you want him so bad, then do something about it.”
Jungwon huffed. “I am.”
“No, you’re not. You’re letting someone else be all intimate with your boy, mind you.”
Anton’s comment landed heavily against Jungwon’s skin. As he turned to look back at Sunoo, he could see the person leaning down, face tucked in Sunoo’s neck as he appeared to be whispering something. Jungwon watched Sunoo’s smile falter, a dark look clouding over his face. Then, briefly, Sunoo closed his eyes and leaned closer to the person.
“That’s fucking it.”
Without hesitation, Jungwon stood up and stormed towards Sunoo. The older man only took notice of him once he was a few feet ahead of him. Suddenly, Sunoo made a move to lightly shove the other person away.
“Jungwon-ah.”
“Hyung.”
The air was heavy. Jungwon kept his gaze on Sunoo. He knew that he might’ve looked displeased. As he intended.
“Won-ah, this is—”
“Soobin-ssi.”
Jungwon finished it for him. Soobin looked impressed. Sunoo looked shocked.
“Jungwon-ssi. Nice to meet you.”
“Hyung, I need to speak with you.”
Ignoring the introduction Soobin said, Jungwon gripped Sunoo’s wrist with his empty hand and began pulling him away. He vaguely heard Sunoo telling Soobin that he’ll talk to him later, and Jungwon fought the urge to tell the man to fuck off. He continued dragging Sunoo behind him as he led them to the second floor of the house. Less crowded and more quiet than a while ago, Jungwon noticed how tight his grip was on Sunoo’s wrist. As they entered an empty room, Jungwon eased up his hold and turned around.
“What the fuck was that, Jungwon-ah?”
Sunoo was furious, and yet he didn’t pull his hand out of Jungwon’s grasp.
“I was speaking to him and you suddenly come barging towards us with that stupid frown on your face, ignoring Soobin hyung’s introduction, and pulling me awa—”
Jungwon wasn’t able to hold himself back, backing Sunoo up into the wall and forcing his lips onto him. Sunoo let out a grunt, and Jungwon had half the mind to back up, apologize for his behavior, and try to talk some sense into him. A confession would’ve been a better start, not a violent kiss that almost knocked Sunoo’s skull against the wall if it weren’t for Jungwon’s hand.
But as he was about to break away, Jungwon felt Sunoo’s fingers gripping his hair, the other hand holding onto his shirt like a lifeline. It was at that moment that Jungwon knew, Sunoo wanted this, too.
And so, he let himself loose. His desires had taken the wheel, devouring its way through the soft flesh of Sunoo’s lips. He slides his tongue out, pushing it against Sunoo’s closed lips, and forcing his way through. This earned a soft whimper from the boy pressed against the wall, his body sagging at the motion and Jungwon struggled to hold Sunoo up. Despite being close in height, Jungwon seemed to be towering over Sunoo, one hand gripping the side of his neck, his thumb drawing circles against the skin of Sunoo’s Adam’s apple. His other hand was preoccupied with Sunoo’s waist, pulling him against his body as Jungwon ground himself against him.
They were a mess, obscene noises from their throats, hands grasping each other like predator tearing through its prey. Whenever Jungwon tried to pull away for a moment to breathe, Sunoo whined and pulled him back, his lips attaching on Jungwon’s jaw and nibbling on his skin. This did nothing but light the fire inside his belly brighter, a violent heat coursing through his veins and reaching down to his cock. Every push against Sunoo’s melting body, Jungwon felt himself grow harder. Every whine and moan he pulled out from the boy, Jungwon felt himself grow hungrier.
Jungwon is a decent man, but at this moment, with Sunoo’s warmth burning through his body, Jungwon might just let himself go.
Which brings them to where they are now.
Where Jungwon is fucked, and he knows that there is no one else to blame but himself. Maybe Sunoo too, but mainly himself. He had chosen this hill to die on, subjected himself to this kind of torture.
After their heavy make-out session, Sunoo wanted Jungwon to take him home. But with the taste of alcohol on his lips, Jungwon knew that it wasn’t right to fuck Sunoo that night. And so, once they arrived in Sunoo’s dorm, Jungwon immediately gave the older boy a glass of water, helped him change into his sleepwear, and put him to bed.
That was four nights ago. Jungwon hasn’t seen Sunoo ever since, and now, here they both are in Jungwon’s dorm room.
“Jungwon-ah, what d’you think?”
Sunoo whines, lying across Jungwon’s bed on his stomach, his attention directed to his phone. It is 11 in the evening on a Thursday, and Jungwon is fighting for his life.
He feels himself throb inside his cotton shorts like some feral dog staring at a chunk of meat. Sitting right beside Sunoo against the headboard, he is forced to look at the older man’s bowed head. If Jungwon stares hard—which is something that he is trying not to do—he will see Sunoo’s bare shoulder and collarbones, his collar hanging loosely because of how big his shirt is, down towards the arch of Sunoo’s back and the swell of his ass. Sunoo’s legs are bent skywards, crossed against each other like a pin-up model posing for the camera.
Except there is no camera. No one else is watching Sunoo but him. They are alone in Jungwon’s room, and Jungwon is hard in his cotton shorts. He’s not even wearing underwear, for fuck’s sake.
The only source of light is Jungwon’s red mood lamp. There is faint music humming through the speakers. Some Frank Ocean song that gets under his skin the same way Sunoo does. It is a Thursday. They have their classes tomorrow. Sunoo just came over to hang out because he said he missed him. Jungwon, being the considerate dongsaeng that he is, told him to come over.
“Jungwon?”
“Huh?” Jungwon wants to smack himself across the face. He probably looks dumb right now, mouth hanging and eyes wide. Sunoo looks up at him, his neck and collarbones on full display.
“D’you want to watch The Summer Hikaru Died with me?”
Sunoo’s voice is quiet. Not as quiet like a whisper, but more of a temptation. The sweetness dripping from Sunoo’s tongue sears through Jungwon’s flesh, setting his whole body on fire. He tries to hold himself back, forcing his hand to stay put because he doesn’t trust himself once he lets himself relax. The way Sunoo smells, too, is pulling him to the brink of his sanity. The older man’s peach and vanilla body cream will probably leave a trace on Jungwon’s bed sheets, and he can’t say that he’s not looking forward to it. Jungwon even wishes that it follows him to his sleep, his dreams laced with Sunoo’s delectable scent.
“Why?”
Sunoo pouts at Jungwon’s response. He should feel guilty for sounding uninterested, but the way Sunoo’s lips look so irresistible right now is only sending lustful throes in his cotton shorts.
“Because I want to watch it with you.”
Jungwon closes his eyes at the sound of Sunoo’s whining tone. He’s well-aware that he looks stupid right now. As if he is purposely being lured into taking Sunoo right then and there like some succubus out of control and out for blood.
Opening his eyes once more, he is greeted by Sunoo’s wide eyes. Jungwon notices that the older man still has some eyeliner on, probably from the hang out they had earlier that day. His mind betrays him as he remembers how Sunoo looked in that white collared-top and denim jeans.
The boy looked perfect, the air of innocence captured in Sunoo’s skinny and small figure, in his nervous habit of clasping his hands together. It stirred a demon in Jungwon, one that he had never known he kept in the dark. Seeing how Sunoo looked like such a boy, he had to fight himself from wanting to touch him. Defile him. Corrupt him in ways that he knew Sunoo would get addicted on.
He remembers the dust of pink across Sunoo’s cheeks and how they would get deeper and deeper at every praise his friends gave him. If Jungwon didn’t know any better, he would’ve given Sunoo a kiss right there, in front of everyone. Just to show people that Sunoo blooms far more beautifully under Jungwon’s attention.
Of course, he had to hold back. He’s a disciplined man, after all. He doesn’t act on his lust whenever he wants to.
This, Jungwon thinks, is why Sunoo being in his dorm room—alone and unguarded—is dangerous.
It’s a test of patience. A temptation that he knows he should not give into.
It’s a Thursday, for fuck’s sake. Sunoo needs to rest, and Jungwon does too.
“Jungwon-ah.”
Sunoo’s call drags him back to the present, and only then does he realize that he had been staring at Sunoo for some time.
“Are you okay?”
Jungwon lets out a groan before he can think about it. This does not go unnoticed by Sunoo, and suddenly, the air in the room turns heavy. Just as Jungwon was about to reach out to Sunoo, the older man heaves himself backwards. He is now sitting on the bed, his knees locked under him and his eyes cast down on the sheets. Jungwon is confused.
“I’m sorry.” Sunoo begins. “I shouldn’t have come.”
Before Jungwon even realizes it, he is pulling Sunoo’s fleeing form by the boy’s forearm, causing Sunoo to fall forward on the bed. Jungwon moves from his spot, his hands rising from Sunoo’s forearm up to the older man’s shoulders, and flips him over.
Without thinking, Jungwon is leaning down at Sunoo, both of his hands on either side of the Sunoo’s head. Sunoo is breathing heavily under him, and it takes Jungwon a minute before he can process what he had just done.
“Hyung.”
He breathes out, eyes still on Sunoo. Like this, Sunoo’s hair is splayed out on the mattress like a halo. The oversized shirt that had been taunting Jungwon is flat on Sunoo’s torso, giving him a clear view of the rise and fall of Sunoo’s chest. If Jungwon looks closely, he can see Sunoo’s nipples peeking through the fabric.
As Jungwon allows himself to look longer, his eyes move up to Sunoo’s neck. His collarbones are still on full-display for him, the older man’s slender neck calling out to him like a sinner’s repentance.
Jungwon has never been so hard in his life.
“Why’re you going?”
In an attempt to deescalate the situation, Jungwon asks. His voice is strained, his desperation out in the open. Sunoo stares up at him with his wide eyes, then turns his head to the side, towards the door.
“You should get some rest, Jungwon-ah.”
Jungwon is confused—again.
“Why?”
Sunoo keeps his gaze away but doesn’t bother to move away from Jungwon.
“You’re tired, aren’t you?”
“What makes you say that?”
Sunoo shrugs, then turns to look up at him.
“You should’ve just told me that you don’t want me here.”
Jungwon’s body goes rigid.
“Hyung… what?”
Sunoo sighs. His hands begin fiddling with the comforter. Jungwon focuses on the movement, still hovering above Sunoo with his arms aching. Still, he holds himself up. He waits for Sunoo to answer his question, but his patience is running thin when he notices the blush growing deeper on Sunoo’s cheeks.
“I don’t know, I…” Sunoo trails off, then looks away. “You seem tired, Jungwon-ah. I should’ve let you rest on your own.”
At the admission, Jungwon feels his body go weak. He can see the guilt in Sunoo’s eyes, and for the first time in the night, his lust subsides.
“Oh, baby.”
The endearment slips out of Jungwon’s lips naturally, and he watches Sunoo’s cheeks turn a deeper shade of pink. His eyes dart downwards, onto Sunoo’s mouth, as the older man bites his lower lip. Giving into the urge, Jungwon drops one of his arms onto his elbow, his head now supported by his hand. His hips dig into the mattress, right beside Sunoo’s, and his other arm lands against Sunoo’s chest, right on the exposed collarbones that Jungwon had been eyeing. His face is now closer to Sunoo, and he can feel his breath ghosting against Sunoo’s temple.
“I wasn’t tired, hyung.” Jungwon confesses quietly, closely watching Sunoo’s eyes flutter at the feeling of Jungwon’s words against his skin. He is reminded of how much he loves Sunoo’s eyelashes, Sunoo’s eyebrows.
His gaze traces the slope of Sunoo’s nose and stops at Sunoo’s bitten lips. He drags his gaze back towards the boy’s eyes. If Jungwon leans an inch closer, he knows his lips will graze the side of Sunoo’s head, right next to his eyes. He thinks about how reverent the gesture of kissing someone’s eyes is, how badly he wants to do it to Sunoo.
But now is not the time, Jungwon tells himself. Not yet, at least.
“I’m sorry that I seemed… uninterested.”
Jungwon’s thumb draws circles against Sunoo’s collarbones before sliding upwards to rest against Sunoo’s neck. Jungwon fights the heat under his flesh to close his fingers and instead moves further to cup his jaw instead. Jungwon’s index and middle finger fiddle with Sunoo’s ear as he continues.
“I was rather preoccupied.”
As he speaks, Jungwon takes a deep breath in and lets himself drown in the scent of peaches and vanilla. He thinks about how he wishes to get under Sunoo’s skin and live in there forever.
“Preoccupied by what?”
It doesn’t go unnoticed by Jungwon how breathless Sunoo sounds like. As he continues to let himself be consumed by Sunoo’s presences, the older man suddenly turns his head to look at him face to face. Jungwon’s heart stutters in his chest, his hand stopping its strokes against Sunoo’s skin. As he rests his palm against Sunoo’s neck, he can feel the rushing pulse of Sunoo’s heart. Their eyes hold on to each other, and Jungwon is so close that he can smell the peppermint toothpaste that Sunoo uses.
If he leans closer, just a tad bit closer, Jungwon might have himself a home run.
But then, he reminds himself that it is a Thursday. Sunoo is tired, and so should he be. They have class tomorrow, and Jungwon is a decent man.
“Hyung.”
Jungwon doesn’t know what he wants to say, but he doesn’t hold it against himself because how could he? He has a pretty boy on his bed, smelling like temptation and sweet sin. Sunoo is placid under his touch, putty against his hold. He can literally do whatever he wants right now, and he knows that Sunoo will open up beautifully.
Another thing with Yang Jungwon: he knows what he wants and how to get it, but there are times when he just doesn’t seem to know what to do. The sense of morality in him has never faltered—except for whenever Kim Sunoo is around.
His resolve trembles at the way Sunoo looks at him, a passing glance that carries so much meaning is enough to make a man like Jungwon go weak.
Jungwon is selfish too, one might say.
He values self-preservation and doesn’t like letting people get to the best of him.
When it comes to Sunoo, however, he seems like a different person. A beast, desirous and desperate. His self-preservation is gone the second Sunoo asks him to kneel before him.
Sunoo gets to the best of him, and Jungwon thinks that even that is never enough.
See, Sunoo deserves more than what Jungwon can offer, or so he believes—but at this moment, Jungwon is willing to prove himself otherwise.
“Jungwon-ah.” Sunoo whispers, his breath kissing the tip of Jungwon’s nose. “What do you want?”
The question catches Jungwon off-guard. So off-guard that his hand against Sunoo’s skin goes rigid and closes lightly around the man’s neck. In a split second, there is an apology forming at the tip of Jungwon’s tongue. Just as he was about to say it, he notices Sunoo’s eyes flutter close.
Then, Sunoo parts his lips ever so slightly and lets out a sound.
A quiet moan.
There is a beat of silence.
All at once, Jungwon is overcome with his greed.
As soon as Sunoo opens his eyes, Jungwon tugs him closer and slots his lips against Sunoo’s parted ones.
It was desperation at its finest. A raw display of desire as Jungwon grips Sunoo’s neck harshly, pulling him impossibly closer as his tongue dives in to feel Sunoo’s teeth. Jungwon feels Sunoo moan against his lips, and this drives him to press deeper, bite Sunoo’s bottom lip harder.
Without even realizing it, Jungwon has pushed Sunoo back on his bed, caging the older man between his arms on either sides of his head. Jungwon feels Sunoo’s hands gripping the sides of his shirt, and the sensation burns through the fabric like magma.
Jungwon pulls back slightly, just to see Sunoo, and he feels his body go weak at the sight of Sunoo’s heavy-lidded eyes and raw-bitten lips. Sunoo looks beautiful breathless and underneath him like this. Like the stuff that makes up all of his wet dreams. Jungwon feels his balls heavy, his cock trying to break free from the confines of his shorts.
“Sunoo hyung.”
Jungwon watches Sunoo stare up at him, his eyes clouded with something dark, something hungry. He feels Sunoo’s hands sliding up through his back before resting against Jungwon’s shoulders. All of a sudden, Sunoo drags Jungwon down, forcibly pressing the entire length of Jungwon’s body against him. This earns a grunt from Jungwon as his hard cock brushes against Sunoo’s thigh. The older man’s legs wraps itself around Jungwon’s waist, drawing him closer.
“Fuck, Jungwon-ah.”
Jungwon’s face is tucked against the curve of Sunoo’s neck, his lips brushes against the boy’s jaw. At the words, he can feel Sunoo arch his back towards him, the legs around him tightening their hold. It is as if Sunoo doesn’t want to let him go—and it takes everything in Jungwon to hold himself back from going insane.
“Sunoo hyung, wait.”
“Jungwon-ah.”
Sunoo sounds meek, honey dripping in that one-syllable word. Jungwon pulls his head back just enough to meet Sunoo’s eyes, their foreheads against each other. Jungwon is not able to stop himself from pressing a chaste kiss against Sunoo’s nose, a smirk growing on his lips as he earns himself another meek moan from the older man underneath him.
“Yes, baby?”
Jungwon waits for Sunoo to respond to him as he lets his hand wander across Sunoo’s chest. He watches Sunoo following his hand’s movements, tugging at the oversized shirt upwards until it is tucked just underneath Sunoo’s armpit. Jungwon holds his stare at Sunoo’s face as he teases Sunoo’s lean torso, fingertips gracefully grazing the warm skin. He can feel Sunoo skittish and sensitive against his touch as he continues watching Sunoo’s dazed expression. Jungwon can see how wet Sunoo’s lips are, and he lets himself grind his hips against the boy underneath him as some sort of reprieve. In return, Sunoo shifts his eyes back up to him, mouth opening wider as he lets out a shaky gasp.
“Jungwon-ah.”
Jungwon sighs at the sound of Sunoo’s wanton desire.
“What do you need, baby?”
Sunoo’s hold on him tightens. Jungwon waits to see which of them will give in first.
“Fuck me.”
Jungwon groans, and finally dives back in to the lust he had been holding off minutes ago. For a moment, they are just devouring each other, hands all over each other’s bodies—and the next, Sunoo’s shirt is pulled off. Jungwon’s lips find their way back to Sunoo’s neck, nipping and biting and sucking at the flesh. Sunoo moans, his hands gripping the hair on Jungwon’s nape like a lifeline. It must be a bad idea, leaving marks so high up, but Jungwon couldn’t care less. At that moment, he’s only concerned of getting to taste every inch of Sunoo’s skin, leaving his mark against the older man’s flesh, a testament that he had been there first.
“Jungwon-ah.”
Sunoo whines, and Jungwon smiles as he bites the other side of Sunoo’s neck. He makes a questioning noise, eyes wide open to see Sunoo’s wide open mouth gasping for air. Jungwon moves to mouth Sunoo’s ear, which earns a higher-pitched moan from him.
“What do you need, Sunoo hyung?” Jungwon mumbles as his teeth takes hold of Sunoo’s earlobe. “Tell me what you need.”
Sunoo looks like he’s on the verge of crying, his drool marking the sides of his mouth. At the sight of this, Jungwon dives in to drag his tongue against Sunoo’s chin up to the older man’s mouth as he licks up the mess, pushing Sunoo to open his mouth further and take Jungwon’s tongue.
“Hyung.”
Sunoo clutches Jungwon’s shirt as Jungwon continues to ravish him. There are tears falling across Sunoo’s cheeks, and Jungwon doesn’t waste a minute before he’s tasting the saltiness in his mouth. Like some feral dog being fed for the first time in ages, Jungwon indulges himself in Sunoo. His hands, as hungry as his mouth, makes its way down, down, down until Jungwon feels the waistband of Sunoo’s white underwear. He slides his hand inside and feels Sunoo’s cock, hard and dripping with precome.
Sunoo keens at the sudden contact, and Jungwon can’t help but chuckle as he tongues Sunoo’s jaw. He keeps his eyes open as he closes his hand around Sunoo, pulsing his fist as Sunoo lets out staggered moans. Their eyes are on each other, and Jungwon feels himself drip inside his cotton shorts. Sunoo’s eyebrows are furrowed, his lips in a permanent state of openness. As Jungwon thumbs Sunoo’s slit, he watches the older man throw his head back as he arches against him. Jungwon’s other hand slides under Sunoo’s neck and forces Sunoo to look back at him.
“Tell me what you want.”
Jungwon demands as he draws tight circles against the head of Sunoo’s cock. Sunoo, in response, grapples against the bed sheets and Jungwon’s shirt, letting out soft cries as he watches Jungwon play with him in his underwear.
“You’re so wet, hyung. Aren’t you so sweet?” Jungwon purrs against the side of Sunoo’s head. “You’re ready for me, aren’t you?”
Sunoo nods frantically as Jungwon digs his nail into the frenulum of Sunoo’s cock, wailing as Jungwon keeps pressure there.
“Jung—Jungwon-ah—Ah, fuck, baby, please.”
“Tell me what you want, hyung.”
Jungwon licks into Sunoo’s earlobe, and he can feel Sunoo shivering. He can’t believe that Sunoo is this sensitive. Jungwon’s mind brings up the image of Sunoo overstimulated, shaking and begging him to stop as Jungwon keeps plowing his ass. This makes Jungwon hoist Sunoo closer, his hand under Sunoo’s underwear loosening up its grip before his fingers begin pressing against Sunoo’s balls. Given that Sunoo just had their laser session last week, it doesn’t come as a surprise that Sunoo is hairless down there. Still, it stirs something evil in Jungwon. Something restless and fiery.
“I need you—fuck, Jungwon—I need you to fuck me.”
Sunoo breathes out the same time Jungwon’s fingers begin cupping and massaging Sunoo’s balls. Then, his fingers stretches downwards, pressing against the older man’s taint teasingly. Sunoo groans, mouth going slack as Jungwon keeps playing with Sunoo.
“Fuck you? With this?”
Jungwon’s fingers begin teasing Sunoo’s puffy rim, reeling in the way Sunoo’s tight hole wouldn’t open at the softest prodding. Biting his lip, Jungwon runs his fingers up and down as Sunoo desperately grasps his arms. Though Sunoo’s hole is dry, Jungwon’s fingers are wet with precome. Still, as he slowly puts force on his touch, Jungwon can feel Sunoo’s body giving way into him.
Like Sunoo was made to take him.
Like Sunoo was made for him.
Jungwon groans when he manages to slide an inch of his middle finger into Sunoo. It must burn, the dryness of it all, but Jungwon can’t help but enjoy the cries Sunoo is letting, gasping and moaning uncontrollably as he wiggles his hips to take Jungwon’s finger deeper.
“D’you want this, Sunoo hyung? Think you can get off to my fingers?”
Jungwon grunts right as he bites Sunoo’s earlobe again. He won’t be surprised if it’s already bruised. Sunoo throws his head back once more as Jungwon draws his finger out, going back to cup his balls instead. Jungwon closes his fist around Sunoo and teasingly tugs on his sac, earning a strangled cry.
“Talk to me, hyung. Tell me what you want.”
Jungwon follows the length of Sunoo’s neck, stretched and exposed, as he keeps tugging lightly. By the looks of it, Sunoo is already gone. There’s a prominent streak of drool on the side of his lips, his mouth loose as his tongue peeks out against his bottom lip. Jungwon surges forward, putting his tongue again on Sunoo’s skin as he licks the spit.
“Baby, what do you want?”
Jungwon demands firmly. He loosens his hold on Sunoo’s balls and rests his palm against Sunoo’s stomach, his pinky brushing the head of Sunoo’s cock. The night hasn’t even begun, and Sunoo is already limp under Jungwon’s touch. The fire in the pit of Jungwon’s belly hasn’t subsided, watching Sunoo’s eyes flutter as Jungwon continues to kiss the juncture of Sunoo’s neck and jaw.
Then, Sunoo lets out a moan.
“Oppa.”
Jungwon freezes, his breathing growing heavier against Sunoo’s throat as he drags his eyes back towards Sunoo’s eyes. He sees Sunoo looking at him, eyes brimming with tears. Jungwon has only seen Sunoo cry one time, and he has never realized just how beautiful the boy looks all vulnerable. The sight of Sunoo crying, of Sunoo begging for something, tugs on Jungwon’s loins. It doesn’t help that he just heard what he thinks he just heard from Sunoo.
“Baby, say that again.”
Jungwon whispers, almost pleading, as he moves to gently lay Sunoo back down. He leaves open-mouthed kisses across Sunoo’s neck, down his chest. He drags his tongue across Sunoo’s nipples, leaving a bite for each, before he continues his journey south. Sunoo’s hands are now resting against Jungwon’s head, fingers carding through his hair.
“Sunoo hyung. Call me again.”
Jungwon’s breath ghosts Sunoo’s underwear, the head of his hard cock peeking through the waistband. Sunoo holds his gaze as Jungwon bites the white fabric and tugging on it. His tongue traces the length of Sunoo through the underwear, slobbering over it until it becomes so wet with his spit that he can almost see through it. He feels his own cock twitching in his shorts, and Jungwon’s sanity is on the brink of breaking as he realized how red Sunoo is.
Looking back up at the older man, Jungwon presses a kiss on Sunoo’s cockhead. This earns another breathy moan.
“Oppa.” Sunoo exhales, his hands tugging on Jungwon’s hair. “Please fuck me.”
Jungwon smiles and makes quick work with getting the bottle of lube from his drawer and taking off Sunoo’s underwear, leaving the older man finally bare naked on his bed. Spreading Sunoo’s legs apart, Jungwon makes room for himself and lies on his stomach. Jungwon is now face-to-face with Sunoo’s hole, and he has never been so hard in his life.
He takes Sunoo’s cock, now red after all Jungwon’s teasing, and begins pumping it languidly into his closed fist. This earns Jungwon small uh-uh-uhs from Sunoo, whose hands have let go of Jungwon’s hair to clutch on Jungwon’s sheets. Sparing the boy mercy, Jungwon leaves a kiss on the tip of Sunoo’s cock before taking it into his mouth. Sunoo’s moans grow stuttered, and Jungwon drags his tongue along the length of Sunoo. His eyes remain on Sunoo’s face as he watches the him writhe, throwing his head back and forcing his eyes to stay open.
Sunoo grows restless, and Jungwon’s smile widens. He can see the older man’s stomach twitching every time he squeezes Sunoo’s cock. He can see Sunoo’s mouth open wider, drool painting his chin and staining the sheets whenever he turns his head to shove his face into the sheets. He can see Sunoo clutching the pillow by his head, his fingers opening and closing, his arms stretching above his head. Just as Sunoo is starting to hold his breath in brief intervals, Jungwon lets go of his cock.
This earns a whine from Sunoo, and Jungwon, as an apology, kisses the inside of Sunoo’s thigh.
“Jungwon-ah, please.”
Jungwon grins, eyes meeting Sunoo’s teary ones. God, he looks unreal.
“That’s not my name, baby.”
Sunoo frowns, spreading his legs further. Jungwon shakes his head and waits. It gets to a point where Sunoo is holding the back of his knees, exposing himself totally to Jungwon. Like this, Jungwon can see Sunoo’s hole. Pink and raw. Ripe, like a peach. Jungwon wants to get his mouth on him so bad, make Sunoo cry with his lips and come with his tongue. He could do it, but the strain in his shorts tells him otherwise.
“Sunoo-yah. What do you want?”
Jungwon holds his breath, one hand holding the bottle of lube, as he waits. Sunoo’s frown dissolves as he keens like he had been wounded.
“Oppa, please. Open me up.”
Jungwon grunts. “Good boy.”
He pours an unreasonable amount of lube directly on Sunoo’s puckered rim and gets to work. He immediately pushes one finger in halfway, wiggles it to feel Sunoo’s warmth, and continues pushing it down to his knuckle.
“One more, oppa.”
Jungwon chuckles at Sunoo’s desperation, but he gives in to the older man’s request. The sooner he opens up Sunoo, the sooner he can get his cock in him. Jungwon draws out the finger, fiddles with his hole with the pads of two fingers, and pushes back in. The stroke inwards is smooth, but Sunoo is tight. So tight, like a welcome embrace.
“Fuck, baby. You’re hugging my fingers.” Jungwon moans as he bites the inside of Sunoo’s thigh. “You think you can take my cock? When you’re this fucking tight?”
Sunoo moans at the feeling of Jungwon nibbling his flesh. It is as if Jungwon is trying to eat him up.
“Oppa, oppa…” Sunoo breathes, and Jungwon watches as the boy tries to reach out to him. Jungwon gives him his free hand, something to hold on to, as he continues stroking Sunoo from the inside. The grind of his fingers is steady. He spreads his fingers apart as he is shoved deep inside Sunoo, seeing how his flesh gives way to Jungwon’s stretching. Not as fast as he normally would go, but that’s only because he’s opening Sunoo up for him.
To be a little mean, Jungwon curls his two fingers on the outward stroke, and Sunoo lets out a sound of shock and pleasure. Having found Sunoo’s prostate, Jungwon knows that it won’t take him long to push Sunoo to the edge. His thrusts are slow, his every downstroke is curved, and his attention solely directed to the expression that Sunoo is making every time Jungwon’s fingers brush his prostate.
It takes Jungwon a solid minute before Sunoo’s breathing is stuttering again, a constant barrage of oppa stumbling out of Sunoo’s loose mouth. Jungwon watches Sunoo gripping the sheets and feels the older man’s thighs tensing on either side of his shoulders. Sunoo’s eyes are wide open just as his mouth is.
Then, as Sunoo closes his eyes shut, Jungwon pulls out his fingers, leaving Sunoo high and empty, his orgasm ruined.
“Oppa.”
Sunoo cries out, sobbing completely as he takes deep breathes. Jungwon leaves wet kisses on Sunoo’s groin and thighs before working his way up again. His mouth on Sunoo’s pelvis, lightly breathing out on Sunoo’s red and weeping cock, before dragging his tongue across Sunoo’s chest. He bites both of Sunoo’s nipples again before laving them with his spit, and finally peppering kissing along Sunoo’s neck and jaw.
“You’re so pretty, hyung.”
Jungwon’s voice is low. He is still fully clothed, but his shirt is drenched with sweat and spit. His cock is painfully hard inside his shorts, probably dribbling with precome. He is barely hanging on to his sense of self, if not for the sight of Sunoo already breaking under him.
“Oppa, please.”
“What does my baby want?”
Sunoo whines as he winds his arms around Jungwon’s neck, dragging Jungwon upwards and slotting his lips against Sunoo’s. The kiss is messy. Wet with spit and drool, the noise turning Jungwon’s brain into static. Sunoo is holding on to him so tightly, his hips shifting to grind against Jungwon’s bare legs. Jungwon can feel Sunoo’s cock prodding his thigh, and he laughs into the kiss.
“You’re so needy tonight.”
Jungwon pulls away slightly to speak, and Sunoo, lips latched onto Jungwon’s jaw, moans. Jungwon can feel Sunoo gnawing his flesh, teeth bearing down on the meat of Jungwon’s neck.
“D’you need me to take care of you, baby?” Jungwon goes back to nibble Sunoo’s earlobe. “D’you need oppa to take care of you?”
Sunoo squeals out a yes, tongue tasting the stretch of Jungwon’s neck. Jungwon cards his fingers through Sunoo’s hair, taking hold of it and tugging. This makes Sunoo moan, stopping him from his nipping and forcing him to look into Jungwon’s eyes. Sunoo looks dazed, and Jungwon feels the fire in his belly roar into life.
“Tell oppa what you want, hm? Be a good boy.”
Sunoo stares up at him. Jungwon can see the need in the older man’s eyes, and his cock leaks.
“Jungwon oppa.” Sunoo whispers, hands gripping Jungwon’s shoulders. “Fuck me please.”
Jungwon’s mind snaps, and all hell breaks loose.
In an instant, Jungwon drops to ravish Sunoo’s lips. He lets go of the boy’s hair and tugs on his shorts. Finally, his neglected cock springs free. Jungwon pushes his waistband down to his balls, not bothering to take it off.
“D’you want it raw, baby?”
Sunoo nods as he stares hungrily at Jungwon’s cock.
“Come in me, oppa.”
“Fuck.” Jungwon groans as he squeezes a generous amount of lube into his hand. He strokes himself one, two, three times before letting his cock go. Then, he drags his sticky hand on Sunoo’s balls, two fingers pushing in Sunoo’s rim all of a sudden. “Need me to stuff you full, huh.”
“Please, please, Jungwon oppa. Please.”
Jungwon smirks at Sunoo’s sobs. He holds himself against Sunoo’s hole, eyes locked on the way Sunoo spreads his legs wider to accommodate Jungwon. Then, he looks at Sunoo’s face. His face is a mess, drool and tears wetting his skin. The sight of it is enough to urge Jungwon in.
Jungwon’s tip slides in slowly, and Sunoo opens up warmly. The squeeze of Sunoo’s puckered hole feels as if Jungwon is being pushed out, denied of entry. Like he is violating Sunoo. Like he is breaking him open.
With just the head of his cock in, Jungwon sighs. He grips Sunoo’s waist tightly, nails digging into the older man’s flesh. When he looks up at Sunoo, he notices that the boy is watching his cock pushing in.
“Baby, is this enough?” Jungwon decides to be insufferable again.
At the question, Sunoo whines as he meets his eyes. “Oppa, more. Please, please, please.”
Jungwon lets out a chuckle and gives into his baby’s request. After all, he can never really deny Sunoo.
Holding eye contact with Sunoo, he pushes in the remaining inches until his pelvis hits Sunoo’s ass. He lets out the breath that he didn’t realize he was holding as he watches Sunoo’s face contort into pain, eyes squeezed shut, and morph into pleasure, lips slack and eyes opening once more. Their gazes are locked into each other.
Without warning, Jungwon pulls out and thrusts back in, a smooth movement despite how tight Sunoo is. Jungwon’s hands are still on Sunoo’s waist, holding him down on the mattress as he builds up a pace. Sunoo’s hands are locked around Jungwon’s wrist. Every withdraw of his cock earns a grunt from Jungwon, and every shove back in earns a whine from Sunoo. The momentum is slow, with Jungwon enjoying the squeeze every time he pushes in. He feels himself leak inside of Sunoo, and Sunoo sucks him in.
“Open up for me, Sunoo-yah.”
The entire time, their eyes have never left each other.
Then, Sunoo’s hand slithers into Jungwon’s neck. He tugs him down for a kiss, their foreheads grazing against each other. Jungwon lets go of Sunoo’s waist and slides his hands under Sunoo’s armpits, taking hold of his shoulders. They are chest to chest, with Jungwon’s cock lodged deep in Sunoo’s ass. Sunoo wraps his legs around Jungwon’s waist and hauls him closer. The angle is intimate.
“Is this good, baby?”
Sunoo hums, his hands carding through Jungwon’s hair.
“Want it harder?”
At the question, Sunoo tightens up. This makes Jungwon breathe out a laugh.
“Oh, you want that? Want me to fuck up your ass?”
Sunoo whines into the kiss, tongue dragging across Jungwon’s upper palate. Jungwon, in return, sucks Sunoo’s tongue like it was his last meal on Earth. Pulling back slightly, he sees Sunoo in his debauched glory. His hair, a halo around his head. His lips bruised and moist, with spit shining his chin.
Jungwon throbs inside Sunoo as he thinks about how he’s defiling the boy under him. The boy he is supposed to be taking care of.
He never knew corrupting someone so pure, so pretty like Sunoo, can be so addictive.
“Baby.” Jungwon breathes out. “Tell oppa what you need.”
Sunoo inhales, squeezes around Jungwon, and speaks. “Fuck me, oppa.”
The request sends a shiver down Jungwon’s spine. Instantly, it urges him to move.
He draws back, away from Sunoo, to get on his knees. His hands find their way back on Sunoo’s waist, gripping his flesh like a lifeline. He hoists Sunoo closer to him, tugging him onto his lap. Like this, Sunoo is forced into an arch, splayed across Jungwon’s bed like a sacrificial lamb for the taking. Sunoo whines at the angle. Jungwon can feel himself lodged deeper into Sunoo, and the fire inside of him erupts.
Suddenly, everything is too fast. Too loud, too filthy, too wet. Jungwon is pounding into Sunoo like he has no time. Sunoo is crying out like he is being punished, begging for mercy. The sticky noises of the lube, the slap of their skins, and the grunts and moans coming from them fill the room. It overpowers the music that Jungwon has left playing, overriding the sense of sanity that he has tried to hold on to.
“Taking me so fucking well, fuck. Hyung, you’re so fucking good.”
Jungwon’s mouth runs loose, his desire driving him to shove his cock deeper, harder, faster into Sunoo’s tight ass. Sunoo, with his hands grasping whatever he can, is staring up at him with an open mouth, tongue pushed against his bottom lip. Jungwon smiles at the sight.
“Baby, what do you want?”
Slowing down his thrusts, Jungwon purposefully grinds against Sunoo. He savors the tight and warm grip of Sunoo’s hole. Home is where the heart is, Jungwon remembers his mother telling him. He doesn’t know how he should tell that he has made himself a home inside Sunoo. It almost seems like Jungwon’s cock is made for Sunoo—or Sunoo’s ass is made for him. Either way, Jungwon pushes slowly, his balls sweaty against Sunoo’s skin.
“Jungwon oppa…” Sunoo exhales, his eyes closing as he catches his breath. As much as he admires the sight of the older man out of it, Jungwon moves his hips side to side, forcing Sunoo to open his eyes. “Please.”
“Talk to me, baby.”
Jungwon leans down, his heaving chest firm against Sunoo’s. He can feel Sunoo’s heartbeat, thunderous in the way it matches Jungwon’s rhythm. Jungwon can also feel how wet Sunoo’s cock is against his belly, weeping from the overstimulation. It stirs the desire to break the boy in him.
“Want your come.”
Sunoo whispers as he winds his arms around Jungwon’s neck. Jungwon tucks his face against Sunoo’s cheek, tongue lapping the older man’s tears.
“Want my what?”
Whining, Sunoo tugs on Jungwon’s hair. This pulls a chuckle out of Jungwon, jostling his cock inside Sunoo. As a retaliation, Jungwon cards his finger through Sunoo’s hair as he breathes him in. Peaches and vanilla. His cock twitches, grunting as he feels Sunoo tighten up.
“Oppa, please.”
“Hyung.” Jungwon whispers as he nibbles Sunoo’s earlobe for the nth time that night. “Call me appa.”
At the question, Jungwon feels Sunoo squeeze him like he doesn’t want Jungwon to leave him. Like Sunoo wants to keep Jungwon inside of him forever. Jungwon likes the thought of that.
“A—Appa.” Sunoo exhales softly as he claws Jungwon’s neck, pulling at Jungwon’s shirt like he’s clinging onto a lifeboat. Jungwon grins, his heart soaring at the same time his flesh is searing at Sunoo’s display of desperation.
“Jagiya,” Jungwon whispers, leaning closer to Sunoo’s ear. “D’you want me to call you that, baby?”
Sunoo grunts as Jungwon swivels his hips, grinding deeper into his warmth. At this, Jungwon can feel Sunoo shiver against him. Sunoo’s cock, pressed in between their stomachs, lets out a spurt of pre-come, and Jungwon takes this as a sign that the older man’s close to coming.
And Jungwon can’t allow that.
Jungwon roughly draws himself away from Sunoo as he pulls out his cock, leaving Sunoo empty and confused. With wandering hands, Jungwon grips Sunoo’s waist until his fingertips turn white. Sunoo lets out a gasps at Jungwon’s actions, and once Jungwon lets his grip loose, he savors the print that his hands have left on the boy’s flesh. He feels his hard cock twitch at the idea of leaving marks on Sunoo, but at this point, he needs to put himself first.
“Jagiya, on your knees.”
Jungwon demands, and Sunoo, with heavy-lidded eyes and weak limbs, complies. He watches as Sunoo clumsily turns to his side before dragging his legs inwards, shifting his hips upwards as he gets on his knees. As the older man is about to get onto his elbows, Jungwon smacks the inner side of Sunoo’s thigh, earning a pained moan from him.
“I said knees, baby. Not elbows.”
He knows how mean he sounds, how cold and demeaning he is—and he takes pleasure in it. As he watches Sunoo turn his head, the lower half of his face covered by his arms which only gives him view of the older man’s teary eyes, Jungwon can’t help but hold his cock to stroke himself to the sight.
“Please, appa.”
Sunoo’s voice is weak and needy. Jungwon lets out a grunt as he grips the base of his cock, pointing it towards Sunoo’s ripe and wet hole. His cockhead kisses the puffy rim, and Jungwon lets himself be greedy and smacks his cock against it.
“Please what, baby?”
“Please…” Sunoo arches his back, his spine dipping into a curve as he raises his ass. “Fu—fuck me.”
Jungwon’s smile is indulgent. Seeing Sunoo bend for him, his body canted to cater Jungwon’s desire, is what drives him to push in the warm wet hole. There is no resistance, Jungwon’s cock fitting in just right inside of Sunoo. Once his balls presses against Sunoo’s taint, Jungwon lets out a satisfied sigh.
“Fuck, hyung. Your ass is eating me up.”
Sunoo moans at this, his eyes closing as he stretches his arms upwards like a cat. Jungwon takes hold of the older man’s hips and grinds deeper, impossibly deeper than he already is.
“You’re made for me, aren’t you, baby?”
Jungwon chuckles breathlessly. He watches Sunoo open his eyes to look at him, the boy’s mouth wide open. There is already a patch of drool on Jungwon’s pillow, and his cock throbs. This urges him to build a slow and steady pace, teasing with the way he would slowly pull his cock to the tip and sluggishly feeds it back in Sunoo’s hole. This lazy tempo sends electricity through Jungwon as he feels Sunoo’s muscles quivering, milking his cock and gripping it like he doesn’t want to let go. It’s cute, Jungwon thinks.
“Sunoo-yah, you’re so cute.”
Jungwon whispers as he leans down, his chest against Sunoo’s sweaty and lean back. At this, Sunoo pushes himself slightly upwards, grinding his ass against Jungwon probably to stir him up.
“Hyung, please.”
“What did you say, baby?”
Sunoo frowns. Jungwon watches the older man’s hands close into fists, clenching the sheets in desperation.
“Oppa.”
Jungwon smirks, but that isn’t it.
“You’re so cute, but that’s not my name either, is it, baby?”
Jungwon leans down further, his face shoved against Sunoo’s neck. He can smell peaches and vanilla on Sunoo’s skin. Letting himself have a taste of the ruin, Jungwon drags his tongue across Sunoo’s neck before fitting his flesh between his teeth.
“Oppa… I’m so close—”
“That’s not my name, baby.”
Breathing in Sunoo’s sweat, Jungwon can hear Sunoo whining beneath him. He lets his hands make their way through Sunoo’s hair, roughly pulling the strands and feeling Sunoo tighten around his cock. Jungwon wouldn’t be surprised if he sees a puddle of precome under Sunoo’s cock.
“Call me, jagi.”
Jungwon mutters, lips grazing Sunoo’s earlobe. Sunoo closes his eyes, lets his jaw drop. Jungwon catches sight of another line of drool on Sunoo’s chin. The older man looks dumbed down, and Jungwon’s cock throbs inside Sunoo.
“Sunoo-yah.”
Sunoo clenches before he opens his eyes. Jungwon maintains his grip on Sunoo’s hair, pulling his head up to bare the older man’s neck.
“Appa,” Sunoo breathes. “Let me come. Please.”
Pleased at the sight, Jungwon leaves a chaste kiss against Sunoo’s chin before he begins moving his hips. Jungwon pounds his cock into Sunoo, rough and hard and ravenous. With every thrust, Sunoo keens like he’s hurt. Jungwon knows he’s not, especially with the way Sunoo keeps turning his head to meet Jungwon’s kiss. Sunoo’s tongue is hanging out of his wide-open mouth, and Jungwon takes it into his mouth before sucking it messily.
“Baby, fuck…”
Jungwon breathes as his pelvis slap against Sunoo’s ass, his cock drowning in Sunoo’s warmth. His pace is fast, driving and pounding into the boy like he’s breaking him down. Jungwon’s skin burn at the reminder that he has the upper hand, that Sunoo is under him, willing to obey his every word. Jungwon is filthy for enjoying the mess Sunoo has made on his bed—tears and drool on his pillow case, a small puddle of precome on his bed sheets. The headboard slams against the wall at every thrust, building up a rhythm that mimics Sunoo’s staccato moans. The room smells of sex and Sunoo, and, God, Jungwon can eat the boy up right then and there.
He has ruined Sunoo all for himself, and Jungwon feels his lower abdomen tense with the incoming climax.
“Oppa, oppa, please—fuck, oppa, let me come.”
Jungwon smiles at Sunoo’s desperation, watches Sunoo arch his back and begins meeting his thrusts.
“D’you want to come, baby?” Jungwon exhales, his hips not stopping. “D’you want me to breed you? Make you my wife and give me a baby? Make you nice and round?”
Sunoo, with his eyes closed, let out a stuttered uh-huh, please, appa as he grips the sheets. Jungwon bites his lips, one hand gripping the pillow cushioning Sunoo’s head, the other digging through Sunoo’s hair. He can feel himself about to come, so he takes mercy and licks into Sunoo’s ears.
“So good for me, jagi. I’ll come in you. Keep you full, all mine. You’re mine, aren’t you, eomma?”
Wetting Jungwon’s pillow with more drool, Sunoo moans wantonly. Jungwon feels his abdomen tighten.
“Come for appa, baby. Show me you’re mine.”
At his word, Sunoo’s tongue lolls out of his open mouth and shivers violently against Jungwon’s body. Jungwon can feel Sunoo’s hole squeezing him, pushing him to let out a grunt. It seems that Sunoo’s hole is both pushing him out and keeping him in. As Jungwon continues to grind, he lets himself look at Sunoo’s face. Wet, obscene, messy. There are tears on his cheeks, drool on Jungwon’s pillow. The sight is divine, and it is enough to push Jungwon to come.
He feels himself filling up Sunoo, all wet and warm, and he knows that Sunoo can feel it too with the way the older boy sighs in relief. As if he had been waiting for this moment, this satisfaction that comes from Jungwon flooding him with come. The room feels hot, their bodies are sweaty, and Jungwon likes to think that this is the closest to heaven that he can ever be.
As he moves his hips in slow circular motions, letting Sunoo’s ass milk him, Jungwon presses soft kisses against Sunoo’s wet neck. He can see the bruises already forming. It looks as if Jungwon had mauled him, and the thought of other people seeing his marks on Sunoo makes his cock twitch.
“Jesus.”
Sunoo moans as he turns his head to look at Jungwon, his eyes heavy and lips plump from Jungwon’s abuse.
“Don’t tell me you’re still hard, Jungwon-ah.”
Jungwon lets out a chuckle. Sunoo does too, and as Jungwon watches Sunoo’s face crumple into a smile, his whisker dimples showing, he knows that he is fucked.
Again, here’s the thing with Yang Jungwon: he had liked having things in order and under his control, his heart kept inside his ribcage, fluttering like a bird not having seen yet the clear blue sky.
Jungwon, for the longest time, was sure that he was doing it right.
He was doing alright.
And now, with Sunoo under him, basking in the afterglow, Jungwon is suddenly hit with the realization that he wants more.
With his room smelling like Sunoo, his sheets stained with Sunoo, and the shape of his teeth on Sunoo, Jungwon is forced to come to the realization that maybe there can be something more.
He had lived long, satisfied and happy, with just how he was living—that was, until he met Kim Sunoo.
And now, with Sunoo wrapped around him, Jungwon dares himself to just do it.
“Hyung.”
Jungwon’s voice is small. His softening cock is still inside Sunoo, and for some reason, he can’t find it in him to pull out. Maybe he’s afraid of what might happen if he did. So he lets himself stay. Leaning back down and pressing his chest against Sunoo’s back, Jungwon lets his lips graze Sunoo’s earlobe.
Like this, everything feels more intimate. And Jungwon can’t help but hold on to it, greedy as he may be.
“What is it?” Sunoo speaks quietly, like he knows a secret coming.
Jungwon takes a deep breath, drowns himself in the sweet musk of Sunoo skin, and lets go of his thought.
“I think I’m in love with you.”
The silence that lingers after Jungwon said those words feels heavier than he expected. He doesn’t dare himself to look at Sunoo’s face, too close with how they are pressed against each other. Instead, he becomes too aware of the little things: the way Sunoo’s breath hitched, his body going rigid, and his hole tightening up around Jungwon. In fact, Jungwon knows that if he wasn’t so scared right now, he might’ve gotten hard.
But that’s not the point. As he presses himself harder against Sunoo, the weight of his body sagging completely, Jungwon arrives at the conclusion that no matter what Sunoo says, his feelings will never falter. He is stubborn, after all.
Of course, the racing pulse inside his flesh says otherwise. His heart, beating wildly inside his ribcage, a bird breaking its way out, tells him that he’s still afraid of being let down. Of ruining whatever something they had going on. Sure, they had been toeing the line, walking along the boundary, but the fall has always been scary. And right now, with his confession still up in the air and his cock inside of Sunoo, his descent—his surrender to his desires—is growing faster and faster by the second.
Until Sunoo turns his head at an awkward angle, his eyes searching Jungwon’s,
Until Sunoo’s hand finds Jungwon’s hair, sliding downwards towards Jungwon’s cheeks,
Until Sunoo’s lips curve into a soft smile, one that is too graceful for a rejection.
And then, Sunoo speaks.
“You’ve kept me waiting, Jungwon-ah.”
At the Chinese family restaurant that their group frequents in, Kim Donghyun is grinning. Lee Sangwon and Lee Heeseung are confused, along with the others.
“Why’re you smiling for?” Myung Jaehyun asks as the waitress brings over their food.
Donghyun shakes his head. Park Jongseong eyes him carefully.
“You know something that we don’t, don’t you?” Park Sunghoon pushes.
“Maybe I do, hyung. Maybe I don’t.” Donghyun chuckles as he splits his wooden chopsticks.
Sim Jaeyun smirks as he picks up a fried dumpling. Heeseung sees this and nudges Sangwon with his foot.
“Is it Dongmin hyung?” Nishimura Riki interrupts.
“Who?” Lee Sanghyeok asks.
Jaehyun’s eyes go wide. “Wait, Han Dongmin?”
Donghyun chokes on his braised pork. “Jesus, Riki. It’s not about him.”
Riki shrugs as he stuffs his mouth full with the fried noodles. Jongseong sighs.
“Well, then, what is it?” Sangwon asks, then turns to Jaeyun. “Hyung, you know something too, don’t you?”
Jaeyun only offers a smug smile and shrugs, which earns grunts from everyone except Donghyun.
As Sunghoon is about to speak, the door chimes by the entrance sound. Everyone turns to look at who just walked in. By the entryway, Kim Sunoo is smiling at them. Yang Jungwon is right behind him. Everyone is about to whine and scold the two for how late they were if it isn’t for the sight of the pair, disheveled and a little sweaty. One may assume that they had been up to something, but it isn’t that detail that catches everyone off-guard.
“Sorry, we’re late.” Sunoo speaks ahead, a couple of meters away from the group. Everyone is still stunned silent, which confuses Jungwon. They are all looking at them weirdly, and then it hits him: Jungwon is holding Sunoo’s hand. Fingers interlaced, locked together like lovers.
As they stand in front of their table, Jungwon turns to see that Sunoo has also figured it out. It is Sanghyeok who breaks the silence.
“Jesus fucking Christ, finally!”
“Took you several months too long to figure it out.”
“Mind you, I even gave Jungwon-ah the keys to our dorm!”
“Donghyun, is this what you were smiling about?”
“Of course! What else?”
“How did you find out about them?”
“Let me not relive a trauma that I had been trying to heal from.”
“Sunoo, you have no idea how badly Jungwon wanted you from the get-go.”
“We have to show him the group chat.”
“Wait, no, I’ll just add him there!”
At the sound of their friends’ conversing about them, Jungwon can’t help but squeeze the hand that he is holding. Sunoo looks up at him with a small smile, and Jungwon knows that everything will be alright.
He is sure of it.
It was just another Sunday morning in Yang Jungwon’s dorm room. Between Christmas and New Year’s Eve, his days had usually been stagnant. It was a limbo, a waiting game. Or so it used to be.
Because unlike last year, where he had to spend the dull days alone in his dorm room, trying to catch up with his academic work, he is now preoccupied with a lapful of one Kim Sunoo.
“Jungwon-ah.”
Sunoo purrs, his face tucked against Jungwon’s neck, lips dragging across the juncture between the younger boy’s jaw and throat. With his arms wrapped around Sunoo’s waist, Jungwon lets out a groan as he tugs Sunoo impossibly closer, grinding his hard and twitching cock deeper inside of his hyung. As a result, Sunoo tightens up around him, his leg, wrapped around Jungwon’s waist and squished by the backrest of the couch, squeezing his torso.
They had been like this for around twenty minutes now. The episode of Revenged Love on the television screen is forgotten, their cups of hot chocolate now cold. And they didn’t even plan on this happening. It just so happen that what they were watching riled Sunoo up, enough to raise a suggestion that they fuck instead of watching. When Jungwon refused to give in, he made a passing (and joking) statement about how Sunoo should just sit on him instead—since he wanted to be filled up so bad.
And the smirk that grew across Sunoo’s face was enough to tell Jungwon that he shouldn’t have said that.
But now, Jungwon has no regrets. Because while he is achingly hard inside of Sunoo, it seems to him that Sunoo is the one who is suffering more.
“We still have ten minutes left of the episode, hyung.”
Jungwon whispers, his breath tickling the hair by Sunoo’s neck. This sends goosebumps growing across Sunoo’s skin, as Jungwon can feel them under his palm. In an effort to comfort his whiny hyung, Jungwon let his hands wander downwards and rest against Sunoo’s ankles. He presses on the flesh there, a soothing massage that he found out Sunoo loved whenever he’s all worked up. This earns him a soft moan from the boy on his lap.
“Please, baby.”
Hearing the pet name, Jungwon smiles to himself, breathing in the fruity scent of Sunoo’s shampoo as he nuzzles his face into his hair. He can feel Sunoo’s hands, desperate for something, brushing their way from his neck up to Jungwon’s hair. His fingers lace themselves into his hair and gives it a tug. Instinctively, Jungwon grunts and pushes Sunoo’s body down to grind him down on his cock. Sunoo’s hold on his hair tightens further, and Jungwon can’t help but grip Sunoo’s ass harshly, the flesh soft and plump in his hands.
“Baby. Behave. I’m watching.”
With his voice stern, Jungwon feels Sunoo tighten up. It takes every ounce of patience in him to hold back from thrusting upwards and giving into the older boy’s desires. At the same time, he can feel Sunoo turn his head towards him, brushing his lips against Jungwon’s earlobe. This has Jungwon holding his breath, his hands squeezing Sunoo’s flesh tighter to the point where he feels that they might bruise.
“Appa, please. Fuck me.”
Here’s the thing with Yang Jungwon: he is meticulous and deliberate just as he is clumsy and stubborn.
Except for when one Kim Sunoo, pretty and putty in his hands, pliant on his lap, is begging for him.
That is when his resolve crumbles, his stubbornness backfires, and all hell breaks loose. Suddenly, he is all rough hands and hard thrusts, driving deeper into Sunoo just as adoringly as the older boy slithered his way into Jungwon’s heart.
His meticulousness lets him move in ways that he knows Sunoo will like, hands pressing against the right points to bring him closer to the edge. His deliberateness allows him to angle himself just right, pulling moans from Sunoo’s chest and tears from Sunoo’s eyes.
While Jungwon does get clumsy when his climax is near, he maintains his composure as he puts Sunoo first every single time, wanting to watch him break before he does.
And at the end of it all, as they lie quiet in the afterglow of their tryst, Jungwon watches Sunoo smile at him—and he knows that he has done right giving in.
After all, who is Jungwon to deny his boyfriend of his desires and devotions?