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When Sebastian says at the end of their 7th year he’s going to take some time to visit the other side of the family, and invites Ominis, naturally Ominis agrees.
Sebastian doesn't know why honestly. The year was a proper shit show. He finished half assing everything, just enough to make him employable. It’s been rocky with Ominis to say the least. But after all that has happened in Hogwarts, he can’t give up on his most long standing friendship. If Anne still will not speak to him, he will do everything in his power to keep what little pieces still survive from the aftermath that was 5th year.
Dear Merlin 5th year.
Half way gone to an eternity bound to chasing darkness. It's a wonder why Ominis still speaks to him at all. It took a whole year after all. One of letting him have his space and think things over after not turning him in for what he did to Solomon. But Ominis can not abandon him.
A part of him is just too tied to Sebastian to be able to truly ever let go, to throw away all that was built. A part of him also knows it's more than just friendship he holds onto.
The invitation to London is more than a trip. It's a do over, a new leaf for the both of them to be able to pick up where they left off. Try to fix what was lost and forget the wizarding world, even if for just a quick summer.
It’s odd really, to try and go back to how things used to be. From huddling in the same bed to being unable to even sit next to each other. From sitting so close he could count each breath to standing at least a foot apart.
To when one night after a well earned quidditch win all of Slytherin went to Hogsmeade. One too many butterbeers later, Sebastian can not forget the way Ominis tilted his head right before pressing their lips together. Never again speaking of that night.
To be boys again.
—--
‘Sebastian!” his aunt coos, pushing him through the doorway with a smile.
“Hello aunt Victoria,” He mumbles as he's squished between her arms.
“Is this your friend?” She peeks over Sebastian to see a very awkward Ominis, unsure of where to look or what to do.
“Yes, this is Ominis.”
“Friend” does little to explain what they mean to one another at this point. Little to explain anything at all. It makes his ears burn.
—--
The first few days in London Sebastian pulls them every which way into cafes, bookstores, souvenir shops. Muttering softly of old memories that resurface at each twist and turn of the streets.
“Anne used to love coming to the river.” he sighs.
Ominis nods, unable to come up with anything of value to say. He can not bridge them together. It can only be Anne.
London is crowded in a way so unlike diagon alley. Instead of the usual hustle and bustle built from magic, bits and bursts of it at the seams of every way you look, London is full of the mechanical. Almost practical in a way. The way the lamps come on every night from the people's hands, the shutters closing for the day. And of course the large clock tower in the middle of it all.
Ben of all names, muggles are truly bizarre creatures. It's hard to hate them when he's here to experience it all, wand tucked under his sleeve to show the world to him.
Sebastian keeps a fair distance between them, scared of being too close and sending Ominis away forever. Even after all these years, he still clings to his boy self and all the mannerisms associated.
If he wasn't such a coward, perhaps he would have half the heart to be a man about things. To live, breath, love. He’s only ever loved a handful of people. All of which have either died, refuse to speak to him, or come from a pure blooded family of lunatics. It's an odd thing to love Ominis. A very odd thing indeed. With so much status attached to him, framing him like a basilica. He’s afraid of ruining it, tainting him with his horrid touch and destroying him forever.
But Sebastian doesn't deserve love, certainly not from Ominis. To love a man, a Gaunt of all men, is a luxury too high. A feat to magic can conjure, and a sickness no potion can cure.
And yet as they stand in the last light of the sunset in a small garden, Sebastian's heart turns with the fury of a thousand suns.
—--
“You never told me you were half-blood you know.” Ominis says, already tucked in for the night. They sleep in one of his cousin's old rooms, now moved out and raising his own family a few towns away.
“It never came up,” he shrugs.
“Not when you found Salazar Slytherin's spellbook?”
There's a beat of silence, and even in the dark Sebastian can see the frown that etches onto Ominis’s face. “No. Not even then.”
“Have you spoken to Anne?”
Sebastian sighs, laying down onto his bed and staring out the window his bed is pressed up against. Full moon tonight. “Sent her owls, no response per usual.”
“She will come around.” Ominis does not trust his own words. He doubts she will heal from all the wounds left behind. Physical and otherwise.
“Has she spoken to you at all?”
“Not since we graduated. Sending her well wishes and all.”
“I hope she's alright.” It's a long shot, hoping the door he has left open will welcome Anne once more. He doesn't know how much longer he is to live without his twin.
“I’m sure she is.”
—--
The next day is spent much of the same. Roaming the streets, eating their fill of sticky sweet treats, smoked meats. But on this partial night, they are out later than usual. The sun has set, the lamps have come on. And they watch as London comes to life, people dancing, laughing and living.
Their feet take them down a rue bustling with people and color. Down at the end of a street where a single sign hangs atop what seems to be a two story house. Molly house, it reads.
There's a man leaning against the side, cigarette in hand and loose dress shirt half open. Looks to be no older than they are, dark curls framing his face.
“Are you guys coming in?” He coughs between plums of smoke. “It’s a full night.”
Sebastian shrugs, “what for?”
“It’s boys night.”
“What is he on about?” Ominis sighs.
“Fine, suit yourselves. I know the type when I see it. But trust me, Molly House is the only place where you will be free to love.”
Free to love.
It seems only Sebastian caught on to that last bit, Ominis already turning on his heel.
“Wait, maybe we should take a look.”
Ominis gives another sigh, but gives in. Following him past two twin oak doors and into a crowd of men dancing to music coming from the center stage of what seems to be a bar. Men that laugh, hold hands, kiss one another without a single fear nor care.
The faint glow from the want tucked under Ominis’s sleeve sputters out. “We shouldn't be here.” he hisses, reaching out for Sebastian.
Sebastian takes his hand, gentle, firm. “Do you remember? At Hogsmead.”
“Sebastian.” he warns, lips curving into the start of a snarl, not letting go of his hand.
“I remember. Every day I remember.”
“We must go-”
“Stop running from it for Merlin's sake.”
Ominis is silent, grip tightening. “It can not be so, no matter how much you and I will it to be.”
Their lips meet the moment he stops talking. Harsh, heavy, hopeful. Ominis doesn’t need his wand to see, to feel. He knows. He's always known. He thinks Sebastian does too.
In this room full of boys with heavy hearts
When they return back to their little home, they head straight to Ominis's bed. Laughing softly while gentle hands card through hair.
“I could never hate you.” Ominis whispers against his skin, ghosting against the nape of his neck.
Sebastian hums, “I was hoping.”
“Do you really believe?” Ominis doesn't say what, but Sebastian knows. Does he really believe in them?
“Yes,” he says back. Even when sleep comes to their eyes like molasses,they return to their own beds. And Sebastian tries not to feel like it's all too final.
—--
Their stay is cut short when Ominis receives an urgent owl from his father, urging him to return home on family business. “I would not return to my family home so quickly if it wasn't urgently needed.” is all he has to say.
So Sebastian doesn't press, nodding and watching Ominis pack the last of his things neatly into his suitcase. They kiss against the early morning light.
“Off so soon. The summer has just begun!” Victoria tries to keep him.
“Thank you for your hospitality, but I'm afraid it's urgent. My family needs me.” Ominis says, giving her a smile and heading out the door.
She doesn't say more, watching with a frown as he goes. “I liked that boy.” she sighs, closing the door softly and tending back to her ball of yarn.
—--
They meet again in the ministry as Sebastian is starting a new job. Nothing major nor exciting, paper work really. He doesn't think he trusts himself with much more anyway. Keep his head down, earn his wages, live his life.
He sees Ominis walk in with his father, head held high. Off to a meeting with the minister no doubt. Leave it to the Gaunts to never miss an opportunity to leverage one of their own into politics. Sebastian doesn't know how Ominis can stomach it.
They cross paths leaving at the same time. “Hello Ominis.” Sebastian tries to smile.
“Hello Sebastian." he nods while his father glares.
They hurry away, muttering something about proper mingling while Sebastian can only watch on. Hoping to catch a glimpse of the Ominis he knew in London.
—-
Their next encounter Sebastian has moved up the ranks, found himself in his own office. No more stuffy basement with only the paper work to keep him company. It's only Ominis this time. Older, wiser. Been a few years since they've done anything but exchange pleasantries on holidays via owl. They don't talk about London, they never do.
He feels like a fool to still hold onto it. Too afraid to move on in hopes that one day he will come back. Sebastien didn't lie. He truly did believe in them.
But Ominis can not afford love.
—-
“Rise, Ominis.” Speaks his mother.
Rise for this father who has entered the room. Rise for the wicked man. Rise for the heathen.
Ominis sits.
“Rise.” she repeats, louder in the face of all the Gaunts who have made the journey to be here. Bear witness to the madness his father insists on bringing to their world. Even after all these years. Obedience is expected, demanded.
He doesn't speak, and he doesn't need to see to be able to feel her gaze sinking into him like the teeth of a snake.
“You will show your own father respect.” his uncle hisses, grabbing him by his collar.
“I will not be compliant in this madness.” Ominis tries, voice wavering as his hands grip the table.
Laugh echo weakly. Unsure of where his little insurgency is heading.
“Then he may leave.” a cousin says at the end of the table.
“Cast him out. He is not worthy of having such a name.” says another.
Ominis can feel the bile crawl up his throat. “I spit on your wretched name.”
Chaos erupts.
—--
One letter comes in the mail during the spring. Sebastien sits in his own home by a low fireplace, folding away laundry and tidying up from the afternoon. He’s found himself back in Feldcroft. All roads lead to Rome he supposes. And Anne has found him here all the same.
Dear brother
Time has long passed since we have spoken. I do not know if I can forgive you, even now. When the years have washed away at my memory, turning that day in the catacombs into a mere dream. I truly wish you well. Ominis has told me of your work in the ministry. I believe this to be your true start in life.
In regards to Ominis, I send this letter on his behalf. He has cut all ties from his family and thus the wizarding world. He came to see me one last time, handing me a letter to send to you as he fears to bring too much attention should he deliver it. Attached to my letter is his. Read it, and do not linger on the past.
Your sister,
Anne
Tied in red string is the letter from Ominis.
Sebastian.
Forgive me for all the faults that have accumulated to this point.
I am a fool. Not a day goes by without my mind lingering on that summer together. Should I have fought for what was real I would at the very least have had a companion in this solitude I cast myself in.
I fear my time with the Gaunts comes to an end now. I renounce my family name and the wizarding world. I know you will think this is too grave, I do not think it is enough. In my travels I have seen so much. A blind witness to the misery and unjust corruption that my family is bringing down on masses of people.
I can not continue to live in ignorance as this continues.
Do not search for me. I beg of you.
Ominis
Sebastian still believes.